#tbh it was actually super fun writing for this pairing i had a good time

[lostaurorax]

our mvp- patrick mahomes.

pairing| husband!patrick mahomes x wife!reader

summary| patrick and his growing family celebrate the chiefs third super bowl win at their parade

authors note| this is my first time writing for patrick and tbh i actually love how this came out! i switched a few things up from his current life in this story that i think flowed better! lmk what you think!!! 💓💓

the past few days had been absolute chaos but in a good way. the chiefs had won the super bowl for the third time and you’re husband had won mvp. things had been really good.

your 4-year-old son was absolutely ecstatic about everything that had happened. he was his dad's second biggest fan (after you of course). he adored pat and was his twin and mirrored all of his actions. so when you pulled up to the big party bus he immediately freaked out knowing he’d be able to celebrate with his dad.

“daddy the bus has the chiefs logo on it!!” your son bronze said in awe as he stared out the window. “yeah buddy i know. wanna get on it?” patrick said as he smiled at your son “um YEAH!!” he said practically jumping out of his seat when the car had come to a stop. “let’s go mommy & daddy!!!” he said as you followed behind him as quickly as you could at 6 months pregnant

“i’m comin' baby!” you said as pat stepped out before you and assisted you out of the car. his hand was placed supportively on your lower back as you both walked behind your eager son to the bus. “i told you he’d be more excited than you.” you said to your husband as you looked up at him “i really didn’t think he’d be that excited” pat said as he laughed “babe you’re his idol anything that involves you automatically makes him excited.” you said as you stopped before getting into the bus “i got so lucky with you three…” he said as he rubbed your belly and leaned in to kiss your lips “mom, dad!!!! come on everybody’s waiting for you!” you’re son said as he looked down at you from the top of the bus. “we’re comin!” you said as you chuckled “i love you baby, you’re our mvp..” you said placing your hand on his chest and placing a kiss on his cheek before slowly climbing up the stairs of the bus before pat was immediately behind you guiding you up the stairs.

“jeez me and bronze thought you guys got lost down there…” your sons godfather travis kelce said sarcastically as you and patrick made it to the roof of the bus. “we’ll hello to you too trav.” you said as you gave him a hug “hey y/n how’s the babe doin?” he said as he did his signature fist bump to your belly “she’s doing great! keeps me up all night and in the bathroom every 10 minutes but she’s thriving!” you said with a tight lipped smile on your face “you’re a trooper!” he said as he laughed and patrick came over after chatting with one of his teammates and dabbed him up. “i’m gonna go see bronze babe.” you said to pat as he replied with an “okay baby” and kissed your forehead before you walked away

“bronze you havin fun?” you said coming up from behind your son who was talking to orlando. “yeah momma!!” he said as he hugged your lower half. “hey orlando how are you!” you said as you sat in the seat next to your son needing a break from standing in your heels. “hey y/n i’m good how are you and the baby?” he said trying to look at you and your son as he talked to him. “we’re good! thank you for asking.” you said as you smiled at him “of course! hey do you mind if i put bronze in one of my tiktoks?” he asked as he pulled out his phone and mini microphone. “yeah i’m fine with that! get me in there too!” you said jokingly. “don’t play i will! i actually was planning to interview all three of you guys too!” he said causing you to laugh. he ended up asking bronze a bunch of questions about the nfl and how he felt about everything that had been happening lately and it was super cute.

“okay bronze last question! what are you most excited for coming up?” he said as he placed the mic next to your son. “um well my mommy’s pregnant and about to have a baby so i’m excited to be a big brother and hope i’m a good one!” he said nervously which immediately brought tears to your eyes. “wow bud that was actually really sweet!” he said as he pretended to wipe tears from his eyes but then he saw you and signaled the recorder to put the camera on you. “y/n you good?” he said slightly concerned “yeah yeah that was just really sweet…” you said as you squeezed your son and kissed all over his face “mom stop!!” he said trying to break free from your grip until you finally let go. “we’ll let’s interview y/n mahomes now! seems only right.” orlando said as he moved to sit in the seat next to you as you were laughing as you wiped your tears “sorry pregnancy hormones make me so emotional.” you said as you looked at the camera.

“nah it’s all good! now if you guys have been following patrick and y/n for a while now you know they’ve been together since college right y/n?” orlando said moving the mic to you. “yeah that’s true!! we met in our freshmen years of college and have been together ever since!” you said as you smiled “that’s awesome. i think anyone would say that you’re pat’s biggest supporter and number one fan. would you agree?” “oh, i definitely am. i love him so much and support him with every bone in my body. but i think i’ve got some competition with bronze! he’s trying to beat me for number 1!” you said as you looked slightly mad but anyone could look past your facade and tell that was the opposite. “you definitely do!! i don’t think he can take your spot tho! that’s why we got you this…” orlando said as he pulled a fake gold metal out of his bag that had pats face on it that said ‘#1 fan of the mvp” on it. “oh my god…i love it!” you said as you laughed and put the necklace over your neck. it was long enough that it reached your very pregnant belly but it was perfect.

“speaking of look who’s walking over here! let’s get pats reaction to that…” he said as patrick walked over as he had already been looking for you and your son who was sitting on your right side as he slept peacefully. “hey orlando!!” hey bab- oh my god…” he said as he saw your necklace and bent over laughing “do you like…? i’ve won the #1 fan award!” you said as you started to laugh too and he walked over to you. “oh i love it and you’re keeping it for later..” he said loud enough for only you to hear as he leaned in to kiss your lips causing all the men around you to erupt in cheers and you to roll your eyes.

“you ready for your interview pat?” orlando asked “oh yeah buddy let’s do it.” pat said as he dabbed him up. “so sorry to interrupt i’m just gonna go downstairs with this little guy so he can rest before the parade starts!” you said as you got up and picked up your son trying not to wake him. “okay baby call me if you need me. i’ll be down in a bit” he said as he gave your butt a gentle slap as you walked in front of him that didn’t go unnoticed by the other guys as they all looked at each other. “bye y/n & bronze see ya later!” orlando said as the camera followed you two as you walked.

“now pat if you could play for any other team in the nfl what team would you play for…” “hm i don’t know man that’s a hard question but if i had to pick id say….” orlando asked him many other questions some about the nfl some about his past and future and many about you and your growing family. “okay final question before we start moving! who’s your biggest inspiration? the reason you do what you do?” orlando said as he watched patrick’s face light up.

“oh man you already know my answer. my wife y/n is my biggest supporter and i’m so thankful for her you don’t even know. i love that woman so much man and id do anything for her. also, of course, our son bronze is my mini me and i love him so much. and our baby girl on the way! that’s the reason i do what i do for them.” pat said with a huge smile on his face. “wow man that was really sweet. congrats again bro! now go find your wifey!” he said as pat dabbed him up once again and went downstairs to quickly find you guys before the parade started. when he walked downstairs he found your son asleep with his head resting on your belly and you were also asleep right beside him. you had every right to be exhausted because you’d basically been up the last two days and had only been running on a few hours of sleep. he honestly wished he could’ve been sleeping right next to you two but the parade was about to start. “hey baby..” he said as he gently rubbed your cheek with his thumb “hm…” you said as your stirred awake “oh man i didn’t mean to fall asleep i’m sorry babe…” you said scared you’d missed the parade. “no it’s okay the parades about to start. if you guys want to stay down here that’s fine, i’ll honestly stay with you-“

“the parades are about to start! let’s go!!” your son said as he was immediately up and ready to go as soon as he heard those words. “alright then let’s go!” you said as you slowly got up from your seat taking pats extended hand. “thank you, baby. now let’s go celebrate my mvp…” you said as you leaned in and kissed his lips. before you could get too carried away your son interrupted you. “not againnnnn come on!” he said as he gently stomped his foot to get your attention causing you to laugh and break away from the kiss. “i’m not done with you baby, when we get home we’ll finish..” patrick said with a smirk on his face. “okay mvp…” you said smirking at him as you adjusted the glasses on his head and walked towards your son and the top of the bus. god, you drove him crazy but he loved you more than anything.

[samssims]

Hi Sam! I was wondering if I could ask for some advice on how to make simblr fun again? I love storytelling (it's how I have fun with the game) but lately with writing posts and even in game, I just find myself stressing over if it's good/interesting enough or if I took good screenshots, if my writing is good, etc. I love this game and sharing my stories with this community, so it sucks to feel like this. Thank you sm ♥

Oh Nonny, how I feel this pain. I wish I had a sure fire answer to this but sadly there isn't just one thing that will work.

I will put some advice below for some things that have worked for me in my experience if you're interested in trying them out to try to find that spark again!

Now I have been on tumblr sharing my sims since 2013 so I have seen the community change a lot. Things change, people come and go, it's just the natural way of things. So a lot of the time your community can change around you and so a few years ago sims storytelling was really popular and it was the thing everyone was doing. And I mean everyone.

But now things have sort of fallen off or shifted and there is no shame in that for those who moved onto other things and hobbies. Sims storytelling, at it's core, is a hobby. No one is making money off of it (unless you write it all down and get it published in which case, hell yeah go you!)

That being said, finding your spark again is going to be finding what YOU like about storytelling in the sims.

So here are some tips you can try out in the game to keep it fresh and exciting:

Play the Game

The game has changed a lot and added a lot. It came out in 2014. It's about to be 10 years old. With expansions still being added. Honestly having a family where you can just play through what the game offers you can offer inspiration on how to use in game things for story related things later on.

I have found having a lowkey gameplay (for yourself or even for your blog if you are posting) is an easy way to stay active in the community while keeping things low stakes and casual for yourself while you work on finding your spark again.

Change Up your Post Style

Idk about you Nonny, but nothing gets me less motivated than having to edit photos. If I could just point, shoot, and post, I would have content coming out my ears. Which is what I started doing with my Princess Legacy. All I do is crop it. I add some things here and there but really it's all pretty much easy.

Now I have done it all.

Prose on photos.

Prose under photos:

Icons Only:

Gameplay Only:

And finally just cropped:

Now what is the best? That is personal preference especially for the project you are doing. However I have definitely discovered the crop method to be SUPER helpful.

It makes me not have to worry about the whole photo. Sometimes I have this SUPER awesome detail in the back of a photo but when I crop them I lose all that. Which is not good for storytelling lets be honest but does force me to focus on what is actually important in the shot.

Example: Here is the full cottage photo from above You can see that I cropped out a lot of the cottage in favor of being able to see the deer and swans as i thought that was more a cozy fairytale vibe than just the cottage itself. I lost a lot of this detail yet the point still came across.

TBH the paired crop photos also makes me cut out a lot of access photos if they don't have a pair. It's sort of made me realize how much I don't need to take screenshots of. Though I am definitely an overtaker of photos so I always have plenty to choose from. Sometimes I even queue them then look back and realize they aren't needed and delete. It's humbled me a bit.

I could break down every one of these posting styles but that's a whole other thing you didn't ask about.

TLDR of this section is to experiment with how you post. You can have a lot of fun with that.

If Something is Boring, Skip it.

Do you hate the infant stage? Age them past it. Do you hate the winter months in game? Set seasons to never have winter. Do you hate in game holidays ruining your plans? Delete them all from your calendar. Is it a crucial part to your story? Not anymore. Write around it. Or find some creative angles and dialogue to write over it.

Make the game fit you!

Follow the Inspo

Have inspiration to make a new sim in CAS? Do it! Want to make a whole new save? Have an idea for one scene that could start a whole story but you have nothing else for it? DO IT!!!

The game is supposed to be fun. If you have inspiration for a project, live in it. Have fun with it.

But Sam, what if only lasts 2 weeks and I never touch it again?

Me too, babes. Happens to me all the time. Own it. Keep it around in case you want to mess with it later. Have 10 million saves. It's your life and if it brings you a moment of joy to work on it, then it totally is worth it.

If you want to be like me: Be chaotic and post it too. Then private the posts later when you decide to never touch it again. Never delete tho. I always tend to regret deleted things.

Find Your Community

You should ultimately write and create for yourself, but find others who are doing it too! Lift them up as well! Use one day a week on your blog to give reblogs or shoutouts to your fellow creators and writers! It's all about lifting each other up and making friends who all have the same hobby as us.

Try New Challenges

A lot of my sims storytelling started from inspiration around legacy challenges. I loved to take challenge rules and figure out how to make a story around them. But remember: Rules are made to be broken. Especially in favor of a good story.

If you are working on a current challenge/story, find another to merge with it or to give yourself a heck of a fun plot twist. There are no rules!

Have Fun!

This is sort of the whole crux of it, right? And if you're not having fun then...

Take a Break

You are not beholden to your queue! Let it die out! Disappear for 6 months. Return when you want. Go play Animal Crossing or BG3 or whatever it is at the moment. Sims is a hobby. But it does not have to be your ONLY hobby. Let your brain rest.

In my case, whenever I leave the sims I am always filled with ideas and ready to come back in like 3 days.

This could also mean take a break from your save too. Maybe spend some time in CAS. Or in build mode. Or cleaning out your mods. You can still do sims things while letting your story brain rest.

TLDR:

There is no right answer for this, Nonny. I promise your photos are all gorgeous and your story is wonderful! But creativity like anything ebbs and flows so give yourself that grace to let yourself rest and just enjoy the game again, or enjoy time away from it! You deserve it you superstar creator!

[soulofamy]

14. What two fandoms would you write a crossover for?

(If I already asked of this one before you can ignore it)

Yet another fanfic writer ask game!

i view crossovers in two ways, 1) with characters from two or more fandoms meeting/interacting with each other in the same story and 2) taking characters from one fandom and sticking them in the universe of another fandom without actually including that fandoms characters

i preface this answer by saying that i am EXTREMELY picky with how crossovers are done. i think isekai stories are incredibly boring unless there is canon precedence for it, i personally like to do it by making au versions of characters to make them fit into other universes more seamlessly.

ive definitely thought about a soulcalibur x starwars au before but moreso because i feel like it would be super fun to draw. its fun to imagine who would be on which side of the force, what species everyone would be, what their lightsaber would look like or what they would wield instead. it already kinda works because we had starwars guest characters before and then lucasarts made a comic about it so like it already kinda exists?? maybe its not mainline canon anywhere but soulcalibur has a multiverse so maybe its canon SOMEWHERE lol. but also if i were to actually undertake this idea for writing, i probably would not include any of the canon starwars characters i would just fill the galaxy with starwars au!soulcalibur characters

i have also thought about a soulcalibur x mortal kombat au before too but like it would have to be very particular characters. calibur has a handful of underage characters and like i kinda want to keep them far away from mk gore tbh lol but like i could see a few characters fitting in REALLY well in the mk universe. azwel would either get along really well with shang tsung and quan chi or he would become the bane of their existence, im not sure yet. i dont have the words to explain why yet but i feel like tira and havik would be a really fun duo. kilik and liu kang would get along really well. i really want to see syzoth interact with aeon calcos because they are basically the inverse of each other, syzoth is a reptiloid who can change to a human form at will but aeon was born a human and was changed into a lizardman against his will. idk if i would pair astaroth up with any character in mk but i just feel like his general vibe works as some sort of an outworld monster. OH and i REALLY want to see geras meet zasalamel because they are both so similar but also so incredibly different

the fun thing about a soulcalibur x mk crossover is that both of them have multiversus and in soulcalibur, the witcher universe canonically fits into the soulcalibur multiverse. which makes me feel like other games could also have their own universe be canon in the soulcalibur multiverse. AND spawn has a line in mk11 that indicates that he remembers his time as a guest in soulcalibur 2 ("Maybe that's why my soul still burns" <- soulcaliburs tagline has always been "does your soul still burn?") which is good enough evidence for me to say that soulcalibur and mortal kombat exist in adjacent universes and thus a crossover would actually make sense

[intermezzobysallyrooney]

i know this is a me problem but i cannot get super invested in challengers because i do not care about either of those men at all...josh o'connor used to be so special to me...and now...still cannot articulate why i find men so boring and/or offputting. used to feel like i was ~protesting too much~ iykwim but now...i don't know. the ratio of fandom's investment in men vs. women is so tiring but is def not going to change and there are reasons why that's true that i understand. but i just...ugh.

tennis at its peak to me was serena/caro/angie/maria/vika/venus/etc and all the contrasting and weird dynamics that were SO different from each other. you can add aga in there too. and it was interesting because of the expectations of how they were meant to act vs. how they did. and now i really dislike them both and am disappointed/angry about a lot of their views, but the chrissie/martina rivalry was so INSANE. like that documentary haunts me and the book about them is like...wow. and the men's versions just do not hit the same for me. like roger/rafa is so boring and i think if i had been paying attention during the peak of it, i'd be more interested in it? but it's so...blah. i think maria/serena tensions are insaaane and for so many reasons and i think it's partially understandable, partially a shame that their rivalry and careers get reduced to these very simplistic tropes that i think are deeply unfair to both of them. like people think maria is one thing and she really is not? and flattening her is shit for so many reasons...god. anyway. i don't know what my point is. i know that a WTA movie wouldn't hit the same way as challengers. and i know it's also just not a movie for me. because the whole ot3 never really works. writing the fic for it was like ok. do i care about him being pathetic? and the answer is no!

rafa/novak is actually kind of interesting to me ngl i miss that account....the history was like damn ok! rn i'm def more lenient of caring about ~shit people or i guess being interested. like obviously not the most vile people like zverev is just so horrible to me i cannot. and then there's more opinion based ones like rublev drives me bonkers because the babygirlism of him is disgusting to me and i think...whatever. this isn't my point. this was supposed to be a post about how i wish i could get invested in f1 but i cannot. the pathway of like...nba fandom (a select few, imo most steph/klay which was like...not really for me but now that they're seperated and watched the wnba game sitting apart...well i am interested!) to f1 fandom to the motorsports thing which i do NOT get is so baffling to me.

hockey is like...the one sport i know the most about and have loved for the longest period of time but i just...i am not built to be romantic about sports or like...oh my god these men hugged. wow. what does it MEAN. like i don't get any of it. i've tried reading the articles and the books and i just find it so embarrassing. and boring! and obvious? unless it gets turned into something that i do not really think exists but it sounds smart. i don't know. like team dynamics etc are so interesting to me but i also think they're so segmental. and contextual that i get sooo bored of like...the reading into it. and then i feel bad because people act like you should be murdered if you read into it with women. but i get that because women's sports already has so many existing relationships that it's not as fun to play pretend because it's a lot easier to forget about male athlete's rl partners etc than like...the fact that mpp is marrying laura stacey. like dartmouth's laura stacey. can you believe that? i still cannot tbh. i don't know! i have no point. sometimes i feel like i am hanging onto fandom and i really should not because i feel like such a drag. the new tennis rpf fics has actually been so good because it isn't boring m/m pairings with no tension. SORRY! but like damn...is this growth? idk. i don't even have anything to bring to the table rn...

also back to challengers the only positive emotion i've had about it in a while was comparing that trio to ben affleck/jlo/matt damon. now that is interesting.

it is baffling to me that qinwen/iga has been the pairing that's hit the most out of every wta pairing i've randomly decided to try. aryna/paula does not interest me at all i'm so sorry. the emma/qinwen was v good and i think the edge of it is what i like. too far but not really at all. unless you're like...rpf should be illegal. which i obviously don't feel that way but i def experience a lot of internal shame about it. i miss writing but i think the unfinished twu fic that will never become anything makes me not want to start writing anything that isn't a one shot that taps out by 10k for sure.

[tragicclownwrites]

Writing Update ✍️

Well, what a busy summer it's already been! Know I've been active here and there, but tbh, life has been crazy - both in good and in bad ways.

I still find solace in writing no matter what, so just wanted to post a tiny update about what I'm presently working on and what I want to work on eventually 🤗📖

Very subject to change but I'm excited!

Current project:

Squarepants family fic

I'm currently working on a fic (mentioned here) that involves the Squarepants family. 🧽👨‍👩‍👧‍👦 What started out as a plot bunny has evolved into something much bigger, which (unfortunately) means it's been taking me a bit more time than expected.

Additionally, with all the lore and headcanons I'm including, this fic is becoming slightly longer than I originally thought. It was going to be ~6 chapters but I'm thinking it might go up to 7-8.

Hoping to share some teasers by the end of this month, but we shall see.

SquidBob is the main pairing. 🧽🐙

Future projects:

Fortune teller/soulmate fic

Yes! This is still happening, I swear it!

I've already shared quite a bit about this fic, but deets are here and here. There will be more teasers when I have more figured out + written/edited.

No ETA yet.

Main pairing is SquidBob, with a relatively big Plabs/Karendy side plot. There will also be Fancykins if you squint.

TLM AU fic

I've definitely said somewhere that I don't usually write/read full-blown AUs (i.e., not canon divergence), but I'm about to do something I never thought I'd do and try my hand at writing an AU fic. 🙌

As with many AUs in SBSP, it will involve humanization. However, it will also involve non-anthro critters that maintain cartoonish attributes (ex. Finding Nemo, Lion King [animated], etc).

Setting is probably ~1800's in a seaside kindgom/village. It won't be super accurate but I'm here to entertain, not educate - unless the opportunity presents itself in a fun way. 🤯

It isn't going to be the timeliest either lol, but it was somewhat inspired by this. 👀🧜‍♀️

I haven't even started drafting this, so no ETA yet.

To the surprise of no one, SquidBob is the main pairing. 😊

Werewolf lesbians fic

I haven't posted much original content for Sims, but I'm a total Simmer and I'd love to do more Sims storytelling at some point. Fun fact: my username was actually inspired by the Tragic Clown from the games. 🤡

The Sims 4 Werewolves did a great job on the lore so I've had this idea to write a story (maybe with screenshots?) based on that with my own made-up lore sprinkled in. 🐺There would obviously be a romance aspect because I'm a sucker for it and there's this "Fated Mates" feature that I just have to include. 💏

Main pairing is Rory Oaklow & Lux DeMarco.

[withercrown]

20 questions for fic writers

Tagged by @spicedrobot!

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

26!

2. What's your total A03 word count?

561,816

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Star Wars. I wrote OFMD and some Tolkien but I don't often stray outside my main.

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

Curse of Hospitality, an OFMD Stede x Izzy fic about Stede taking care of Izzy while he's sick. I wrote it for the approximate one month I was into the show haha.

Found, a BobaDin fic where Boba is deaf. Actually one of the first fics I did for Star Wars!

Mand'alor Darasuum, a DinMaul longfic where Maul saves Grogu from Gideon instead of Luke. This is probably the fic I'm proudest of and enjoyed writing the most. :)

Stardust Legacies, a DinLuke fic that I'm always very close to deleting. I am glad I wrote it for a lot of reasons, but it needed way more work than it got and I don't have the energy nor desire to improve it. But hey, some people really like it.

Memories of Water, an ObiMaul longfic where they train Luke on Tatooine together. Super happy with this one.

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I respond always. I just think it's good form. I'm also looking for community in the fandom, not just one-sided praise.

6. What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Fateful Absence, most likely. It's not really angsty? It's just not a happy ending. I'm not a whump person tbh.

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Ferine Love Language! It's the sweetest ending more than the happiest I think, but it's the one that makes me happiest.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Yes, on DinLuke fics, from DinLuke fans. Outright flames, weird/entitled comments, pestering for updates or bitching about creative choices. I stopped being interested in the pairing once I discovered TCW thankfully, because honestly it just wasn't a nice community.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

I do! But not often. I tend to write awkward sex. I think it's more fun to write about first times realistically.

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

Nope!

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I'm aware of.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Not for a long time. In my former fandoms I had some stuff translated into Chinese but that's all I remember.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Again, a long time ago. I would absolutely love to collaborate on Star Wars fics sometime though. :)

14. What's your all-time favorite ship?

Realistically, probably ObiMaul. But DarthFett is an extremely close second. They're both wonderful but in completely different ways.

15. What's the WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

An ObiMaul (or) JangObi dating sim. I wrote/coded probably 70k of it and it was good, but dating sims are obviously a bit more likely to get litigated against, among other things. I'd really love to do something with it, given that we had some great art for it, but I'm not sure how that will pan out.

16. What are your writing strengths?

Long stories. I feel like I'm good at pacing a story and bringing together plot threads into a cohesive ending.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

SHORTER STORIES. I really struggle with oneshots. I've written quite a few but it always takes so much longer. I can sit on a oneshot for months and months before feeling like it's finished.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

I think it can be done well, but don't just stick stuff into google translate and hope for the best. I think using Mando'a words for texture, for instance, can be really good.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Oh man. Silence of the Lambs, I think?

20. Favorite fic you've ever written?

Faith's Fetters. It's the only fic that I've really done a deep dive into the potential relationship between Vader and Maul. I think it's the most interesting fic I've written, too.

[digisurvive]

Saki ramblings

I think it's funny that Aoi and Saki might outwardly look like opposites— the serious, reserved, anxious girl and the carefeee, outgoing optimist— bc what they both choose to say is very measured and there's a high degree of reservation for both. With Saki, it makes her appear downright flighty and oblique, whereas Aoi comes off as more lenient & docile & overall a lot more repressed lol I think it could be fun to write them both running into each others' emotional walls

The other thing that is fun is that Aoi generally likes talking about what bothers her. If you prod her, she tends to overshare. She is super consistent lol She likes being asked her opinions on things, having the chance to voice her misgivings w/o disturbing the morale of the group and to be reassured about things; plus she deeply dislikes having her concerns dismissed through "don't worry so much" lol

On the other hand, Saki gets annoyed/upset if you press her. Saki really isn't upfront about what she wants. She takes the edge off situations through jokes like Minoru (this makes the way she's rude to him extra funny lol Hating the mirror that reflects you, huh), but hers are more charged because even if she says it lightly, she's still taking notice to the ways the other respond. Sometimes she just wants to play around and be comforted without going into the gritty details and others she wants to actually talk about things sincerely but she won't openly say which time is which.

Her bluntness is interesting for me because she (& Floramon) tend to get annoyed when Takuma is tepid/too conciliatory, but Saki herself is fairly adverse to conflict. Not just disliking the fact they have to fight the mons, she gets outright weary of the group fights. That passage in pt4 where Aoi gets mad at Kaito and yells at him to let her handle the child digimon trio? Saki was 'oh boy, now even Aoi is getting mad.' So, it's funny that she gets annoyed at Takuma for being tepid when she herself doesn't wanna get involved in the arguments— even when she has a clear stance (Like when she told Minoru that voting on a human life was unethical. But still preferred to just watch Kaito and Shuuji fight, though she arguably agrees w/ Kaito). Both because she fears rejection so she would rather not disrupt the group and bc that conflict aversion.

At the beginning of the story, her bluntness reads more like impulsiveness for this reason. I'd have liked to see it evolve to a more conscious frankness tbh! (the response the affinity dialogues provide about her stance on conflict is really good though).

I love also love how utterly incompatible she's w/ Shuuji LOL I love So Much that affinity dialogue in pt3 where Shuuji is crying about the Professor & Saki can't stand him 😂 Despite sharing the risk/conflict aversion, they express it in such clashing ways. I love how utterly unfair she's to him in that scene. Part of Shuuji's conflict is that he isn't allowed to express that sensitive, crybaby side of his & it spills without control. He feels even less allowed as the oldest there, and it's such a moment that reinforces that. Not that you can blame Saki for not wanting/being able to engage, it's just that delicious incompatibility.

I also wish we had gotten more out of her and Ryo as foils because they're really similar in core ways: their desire to be accepted, extreme sensitivity to how they're perceived, their keenness; yet they'd seem to express in nearly opposite ways. I feel that they could've worked as a meta pair in a similar way Aoi n Shuuji do.

[mermaidsirennikita]

I also read the Maiden Lane series (I finished the last book last week) and I actually think book 2 was my favorite, I devoured it, I think all the negative reviews there are on Goodreads made me lower my expectations and I was so pleasantly surprised. It was such a different “ballroom romance” and never afraid of going to more difficult and “immoral” places. I think generally speaking there is too much purity discourse around historical romance and I was just surprised by how unapologetically messy all the characters are in her books. Do you have other books with that vibe? Also thank you a lot for the rec cause I think my perception of what makes a good historical series totally changed after reading her books

I'm so glad you liked it! That book gets a bad rep because it is "cheating", which I think is so unfair tbh. I don't feel like historical romance cheating is often the same thing as contemporary cheating, lol. Was Hero engaged? Sure. Did she have any feelings for that man or vice versa? No. Her brother was forcing her into the relationship. She had no true power. Her giving her virginity to a man who was not her intended was truly one of the only acts of agency available to her, and it was risky as hell.

But yeah, a lot of historical readers, unfortunately, are there to basically act out their purity fantasies. Like, it's fine if the characters fuck outside of wedlock, but only if it's monumental and viewed with shame. Non-virgins must be widows. Sex should result in pregnancy, etc. There's not a lot of consideration given to the fact that a) these books are inherently inaccurate and b) even if they were true to life, people had casual (by the standards of the time) back then, many marriages occurred because sex was had out of wedlock, people anticipated the wedding often, women took lovers. Not everyone felt this huge amount of guilt over it. Hoyt is so good at that.

For a similar vibe, I would absolutely recommend Joanna Shupe, who wrote a few Regencies, a few Victorians, and mostly Gilded Age books. Her characters love sex and are immensely messy (so much drama, so many revenge plots, so many heroines defying their fathers, so much excess) aaand often make bad decisions at first. I would recommend basically anything by her, but standouts include:

The Uptown Girls Trilogy: About three daughters of a rich New York man--the oldest one, who fucks daddy's lawyer/fixer; the rebellious middle child, who asks a casino owner to mentor her but dun dun DUN he really wants to ruin her dad; the baby angel, who gets tangled up with a gangster.

Fifth Avenue Rebels: Four friends get into some bullshit after a messy Newport party--the first is childhood friends to lovers with a heroine engaged to another man; sex lessons by a himbo rake to a shy wallflower type; former fiancees who hate each other hooking up at a masked sex party; and two assholes who've been circling each other the whole series finally becoming fuckbuddies, except he wants LOVE.

My Dirty Duke: a novella about a heroine who wants her father's BFF

Wicked Deceptions: her Regency books about: a duchess who disguises herself as a courtesan to get pregnant by the husband that abandoned her; a former scandal of a woman tangling with an uptight earl; a woman who cross dresses in order to do some good in the world getting found out by her dude friend who thinks he's going insane.

Nicola Davidson writes some fun books about people who walk on the wild side--she especially focuses on sex and queer issues. Start with her novellas, like Seven Sinful Nights (heroine agrees to be bad man's mistress for a week to avoid. her horrid in-laws) or Duke for Hire (the heroine pays a down on his luck duke to deflower her). Davidson does a lot of research and is super knowledgeable about things like sex toys, sex work, etc, in the past.

Eva Leigh writes really frank, honest books with morally complex characters. Lady Viper and The Bastard is her Georgian novella about a pair of rivals (both in their 40s) who fall in love as they scheme to tear two lovers apart; her Last Chance Scoundrels trilogy is a really good series about three friends (two of whom are brothers) who have to find wives within a year after ruining a much-vaunted wedding. Does a good job of exploring a more diverse (in several ways) England with artistic circles and parties and hedonism. Offers characters from both aristocratic and working class backgrounds.

Adriana Herrera's Las Leonas series focuses on a group of friends who leave the modern Dominican Republic and go to Paris to find love. The first book is m/f, the second f/f. They explore a world you rarely see in historicals, with sex (not all straight) and politics and art and subversive thinking.

You might also like Sierra Simone's historicals--she writes great erotic romance. Try The Chasing of Eleanor Vane (m/f, heroine is engaged to a loser but is seduced by his older uncle) and The Last Crimes of Peregrine Hind (m/m, one hero abducts the other for revenge, BDSM ensues), and The Conquering of Tate the Pious (f/f medieval, abbess falls in love with a lady conqueror who also conquers ladies).

Stacy Reid writes some deliciously messy books that sometimes feel like send-ups to old school historicals. Try her Wedded by Scandal series, which I love, featuring absolutely nobody who isn't messy, and tons of public sex.

Grace Callaway writes some really hot, fun, messy, mystery-solving historicals. Give her Lady Charlotte's Society of Angels series a try. It's Charlie's Angels, but historical, and these girls are constantly getting into trouble and falling for men who go "I must spank yhou for this, 10% as punishment and 90% because I'm hard". They're delightful.

Of course, you should definitely try Sarah MacLean as well. Her Rules of Scoundrels series (my favorite) focuses on four casino owners; Bareknuckle Bastards centers three outcasts who run Covent Garden; and her current Hell's Belles series focuses on a girl gang of friends who fuck shit up, basically.

Alexis Hall's Something Fabulous is a m/m historical romcom about a pair of heroes who go on a wild goose chase for the uptight one's fiancee after she runs away. The next book, Something Spectacular, focuses on the queer world even further with a genderfluid lead falling for a castrato soprano (fun fact: entirely accurate that castrati GOT THE FUCK LAID EVERYWHERE). If you want less whimsy and more drama, his A Lady for a Duke focuses on a trans heroine falling for a duke and having to deal with telling him about her past. Also something historicals often avoid--queer people have always existed!

[ivarthebadbitch]

Tagged by the one and only @aethelreds :)

How many works do you have on AO3? 113

2. What's your total AO3 word count? 426,197 :O

3. What fandoms do you write for? been on a little hiatus lately, but most recently it's been vikings, tlk, little bit of vikings valhalla, whatever else I'm in the mood to write

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos? 1. Only you (HOTD); 2. Climb (GoT); 3. The test (Rings of Power); 4. Strange things can happen (Vikings); 5. Insatiable (Lovecraft Country)

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not? Sometimes. I do read them all, I just don't always know what to say in response! I do try to reply to longer or especially nice comments.

6. What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? I've written some angsty stuff but generally try not to end on a super bleak note. The drowned and the damned is pretty fucking bleak all the way through, though.

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? I AM a sucker for happy endings so I've got a bunch of them. Strange things can happen might be my favorite, though.

8. Do you get hate on fics? only once

9. Do you write smut? If so what kind? every now and then, when the mood strikes. I've had my fun dabbling with femslash but my actual favorite is my silly overlooked richelieu/marie de medici three musketeers fic, Acid and honey. this is the one and only story on ao3 with this pairing, so you know it's special.

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written? nah

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen? not that I know of, no

12. Have you ever had a fic translated? yep, somebody translated my borgias fic Aut Caesar aut nihil into Russian, which was awesome and very flattering.

13. Have you ever cowritten a fic before? Vikings modern au We could've been better with @volvaaslaug, a true meeting of minds and a total delight to write.

14. What's your all-time favourite ship? ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ I think I've sort of moved away from this, tbh. I got nothing.

15. What's a WIP you want to finish, but doubt you ever will? ugh, I'm terrible at finishing anything; I've got sooo many sad little unfinished stories sitting in a folder. but the one that's been nagging at me is a helaena lives/helaena is the prince that was promised hotd fic. I got maybe a third of the way through and totally stalled out.

16. What are your writing strengths? I like to think I do a good job with characterization and dialogue...

17. What are your writing weaknesses? finishing anything, especially multichapter stuff. I'm not into the whole writing plot thing and doing much in the way of actual planning and that's defeated me a number of times.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic? I've never attempted it, but I'm a silly monolingual american. I mean, I guess if it's fitting for the context of the story? I dunno.

19. First fandom you wrote for? agent carter <3

20. Favourite fic you've ever written? Animal. It's under 600 words, I wrote it five years ago, and I've written a lot since but it's still special to me.

[iboatedhere]

Hi! So I have a random question about writing but no pressure to respond at all. I started reading your stuff as soon as I joined the LS fandom earlier this year. I am a big fan of your writing and how you can create a whole universe through one short prompt. This last month has been so awesome, thanks for everything you're doing to make the wait for Lone Star a little less hellish. Saving my life tbh. 😂 🙂

I have written a bit in some of my past fandoms and with the new season coming, I have been thinking of writing some stuff for Lone Star. I've never used a beta before, and since I'm sort of new to the fandom, I thought it might be good to find one if I decide to try writing for Lone Star. It sounds like you use a beta from time to time. I was wondering like, have you always had one? How does it work, is it just you tell them what you want them to look over and they comment? I did some googling and it sounds like what they do varies. Do you think it makes a big difference or is it just a nice extra thing to have? Is it hard to get feedback, like have you ever gotten negative feedback? That seems like the scariest part lol.

I still don't know how I'd find one, but just curious about how it works and how it helps, especially for a writer who writes as much as you do. Sorry this is kinda long, so no worries if you can't answer. Just asking around to some writers in the fandom who have mentioned using a beta before. Thanks so much in advance for any feedback!

Hello!

I didn't always have a beta, especially not when I was starting out and imo---you can tell. But that's okay! I mean, we all do this shit for free and for fun and as long as 80% of the words are in the correct order and 70% of those words are spelled correctly it's fine!

(If you ever sign up for a writing challenge or a big bang or something like that, they might require a beta and if that's the case I've found that if you don't have one, they'll assign one for you.)

I started to use a beta on a regular basis in the last fandom that I was in and found that it really helped a lot especially since I am not a proofreader and I never have been. Even when I was in school I would finish a paper and call it a day because I was not rereading that shit.

When you get into a new fandom is always kinda scary because maybe you don't have any friends there and it's super intimidating especially if the show has been going for a bit and everyone is kinda paired off into a groups and finding someone to read your work can be hard. I actually don't know how Sonia became my beta but I literally thank god that she did because she makes all my stuff so much better. She reads for grammar, spelling, structure--she'll tweak stuff that isn't working and switch stuff around so it sounds better. When I write, I basically just word vomit into a doc and she sorts it all out for me. I love it and I need it.

SO, basically, a beta will do whatever you need them to do, but they will only do what they want to do. I lucked out with Sonia because she does it all and she's a wizard but there are betas out there that only read for spelling or grammar (which is fine because they are also doing this for free and for fun). I will literally end a fic midsentence and be like "I don't know what's happening help" and she will help me. So for me, I definitely need one and I need it to be Sonia.

So, I would definitely suggest getting a beta, for at least grammar and stuff because I honestly cannot be bothered with that. You can tell when you read stuff that I just whip out there (codas written the day after an ep airs) without it being betaread.

Feedback:

For me, I absolutely sweated every single second after I hit post on that first LS fic. I was terrified that no one would read it or no one would like it and as a writer you want your stuff to be read and liked! But it all worked out, and now I'm really glad I took the plunge.

Negative feedback: I literally just got some the other day and you just have to tell them to go fuck themselves, honestly, and let it roll off your back. Again, we're all doing this for free and for fun and unless you specifically ask for criticism, they should not be giving it. Tag your stuff to the best of your abilities, leave an author's note at the end if you feel like something might get dicey, but beyond that, they know where the back button it.

[superfluouskeys]

35, 57, 69 for the fic writer asks?

Thank you for indulging me!!!

35. What’s your favorite fic you’ve posted?

This is hard to answer LOL, like almost every fic is special to me for some particular reason, and ya girl has been blasting the internet with her nonsense for a solid 20 years at this point. I always have a particular fondness for fics that were especially difficult for me to write for whatever reason, especially when I feel they turned out well, because it's so satisfying to be able to see the work I put in paying off. But then again I'm looking at my recent fics and I'm like "okay but the hawkeline one was easy to write and I really love it :( and [redacted--i promise it's NOT the prisoner LOL] took 10 yrs off my life and i hate it :("

But with that said the fic that came to mind was New Disaster (portal chell-focused chelldos fic) because it was hard to write in the sense that it's so self-contained within one character who canonically doesn't speak. It's hard to strike a balance between heavy introspection/character-focused pieces and actual story progression, which I think I did well in that fic. Not to say it's my favourite ever bc I think that would just be impossible to choose but I still feel a lot of fondness for it and it's not like super recent!

57. How conscious are you about including symbolism or foreshadowing in your fics?

Extremely conscious--it's almost always very intentional! Although don't go looking too hard or you'll just notice that I love to put a scene in the rain and you won't be able to unsee it.

69. What are your favorite fics at the moment?

Oh this is gonna be so bad I'm so sorry in advance. So I don't read very much fanfic anyway, and as I am currently in my first year of law school that pitiful number has been reduced to near-zero. Pretty much if I read something it's bc a friend wrote it/sent it to me or I stumbled upon it somewhere and immediately liked the writing style--like we're talking IMMEDIATELY like if you don't have me in the first sentence I literally have to go back to reading about the constitution or whatever.

The only time I usually search AO3 for stuff is when a particular pairing has made me insane and I want to see what's out there for it, and I'll just open a tab of anything that looks vaguely legible and go through mercilessly judging them on the first few sentences akjsndkjasdnad like I don't read tags at all and very often get absolutely BLINDSIDED by something I could have easily seen but that's part of the fun tbh.

So this has been awhile at this point but the most recent fic author whose style I was absolutely obsessed with is thepapernautilus/thenautilusknoweth--I stumbled onto her fics bc of wol/g'raha from ffxiv and her prose is just so evocative and gripping that by the time I realized what level of spicy fic I was reading I was too deep in and was just like welp whatever I'm along for the ride at this point LOL.

Another fic that never leaves my mind is April Come She Will by tetrahedron -- it's Hawke/Varric and Hawke/Fenris (set in da:i) and it's just......exquisite pain. I can only dream of writing angst so good. Altered something fundamental in my DNA.

And of course no such list would be complete without the incomparable menzosarres, known by many names, who totally 100% definitely doesn't write anymore and if I went looking for an anonymous fic that may or may not have been written by her as SOON as I had the relevant show knowledge to understand it well then that is a matter for history to decide.

Fanfiction Writing Asks

[clumsyclifford]

2022 Writing Evaluation

hi i dug this up from the archives of this time last year because it was fun to do and i wanted to give other writers a chance to reflect if they’re so inclined! so here is my 2022 writing self-evaluation. point of order, i’m mostly filling this out specifically for my bellawritess ao3 and all the rpf stuff i write, not my other secret ao3 where i put fics written about fictional media. okay, onward. 

1. number of stories posted on ao3: 23!

2. word count posted for this year: 117,763

3. fandoms i wrote for: 5sos, atl, and 1d (but also teen wolf, mcu spiderman, hawkeye, and daredevil)

4. pairings: cake, lashton, malum, jalex, narry, halex (you know that very popular harry styles/alex gaskarth ship), and mirry.

5. story with the most kudos/bookmarks/comments: the answer to all three of these criteria is a change of heart and a silver lining, my winter 2021-22 fic exchange fic, which makes me very happy. i cannot believe that fic was from last year, january feels like forever ago but i love love love that specific work so much, in large part because of how much i was able to tailor it to meg as reciprocation for all the times and ways she tailored things to me.

6. work i’m most proud of (and why): i’m gonna say a three-way tie between (1) i got a radar for trouble (and you’re a renegade), (2) between all the gasping i finally breathe, and (3) play it again and again and again. #1 is the cruel summer prequel fic that i always half-jokingly said i would one day write and then surprised myself by actually writing, and i am incredibly proud of how well i managed to recreate the vibes of cruel summer fic but also write a prequel that made sense with the direction the actual cruel summer story took. #2 was one of the first legit fics i wrote to break myself out of this big 5sos fic slump i had been in (consequence of a perfect storm of a lot of small things), and i may have gotten lost in the metaphor sauce but i maintain that the metaphors are really fucking good which was gratifying to me as a writer who had felt like maybe i’d lost my real writing skill before then. #3 is the christmas fic i wrote for hazel, and what i’m most proud of there is that i fuckin actually wrote that. my love for my friends carried me through the warfields of attempting to romanticize christmas, and in so doing i think i actually learned something about christmas, ugh i feel like i’m getting less jewish every second i spend talking about this but i really am proud of myself for writing that and even moreso because i think i tailored it pretty well to hazel’s taste and that made me happy. it was like an extra challenge i set myself and then i did it well.

7. work i’m least proud of (and why): pretty much all the prompt fics from this year’s batch, tbh. this malum roommates one is really funny if you imagine you’re a fly on the wall of mine and megs’s dorm room but it’s the most nothing fic on the planet otherwise, and you’re my whole house is cute but again, literally nothing. unfortunately these were written while i was binge watching seinfeld which probably contributed to how much they were About Nothing but that’s no excuse.

8. share or describe a favorite review you received: i’m super terrible at remembering comments and stuff that people leave me but a few days ago i got a comment on yssdf saying it was one of the best love stories they’d ever read and that just about knocked my socks off

9. a time when writing was really, really hard: from aboutttt february to september, which is pretty obvious when you notice that i didn’t post a fic (on this account) between march 18th and september 27th of this year. i hit that aforementioned slump in a big way and i was also busy with life stuff and i was also just. unmotivated and uninspired! but in that time i wasn’t really doing a lot of writing to struggle with. something that was actively hard to write was definitely parts of the jet lag songfic i wrote for the fest. megs and hazel both experienced various aspects of my intense battle with Plot and Characters. it was not pretty.

10. a scene or character you wrote that surprised you: luke in the muke college beach fic!!! he was so much more gutsy than (a) he’s usually written and (b) i expected him to be. and tbh, michael in that fic also kind of surprised me, although less so because he was based on a real guy i know, so it was more like trying to delve into the fictionalized mind of a real human being i go to school with and understand what it is that makes him only APPEAR to be an asshole and in reality maybe actually have a heart of gold. if that makes sense. character work but the character is based on a real person who is based on a real person. meta af.

11. a favorite excerpt of your writing: ill be the first to admit im a sucker for when there’s a song playing in the in-universe fic scene and then the lyrics tie into the moment. i have that in two fics that i can think of, so here they both are:

(1) from everywhere, everything:

Luke is trembling when he looks up at Ashton, but he only nods. Tilts their foreheads together.

Say it’s me that you’ll adore— Sinatra sings, and then there’s a scratch and a crack, and the whole record player crashes through the glass tabletop.

(the end of that lyric is “for now and evermore” !!!! HOW FUCKED IS THAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)

(2) from faith in a stolen car (the jean jacket songfic i just wrote for the fest):

Calum’s rumbling laugh shook both of them as Springsteen vowed I’ll love you with all the madness in my soul, and Ashton sang along in a silly voice so Calum knew he meant it with everything he had.

[and]

He turned up the music, and ‘No Surrender’ blared out of the surround sound. The lines that had been stampeding around Ashton’s brain since Calum had first swept him up in tonight’s teenage delinquency now screamed against the wind in his ears.

Ashton smiled wider than his face could handle and screamed right back.

“WE MADE A PROMISE WE SWORE WE’D ALWAYS REMEMBER,” Calum’s voice joined his, and together they beat back the deafening gales; “NO RETREAT, BABY, NO SURRENDER!”

12. how did you grow as a writer this year? this year i learned the importance of conflict. “hey bella, didn’t you learn that in seventh grade english?” YES but then i IGNORED it and now i have relearned it in a fanfiction context and in the broader sense that i now understand every story has a conflict and more than that, a story needs a conflict, because that’s what drives it. after i finished writing those prompt fics, i thought, damn, these are fun but nothing is fucking happening in any of them. i wonder why that is! and then i realized. there was no conflict. i was writing “scenes” but nothing interesting within those scenes, so there was nothing pulling the characters from point A (the start of the scene) to point B (its conclusion) and as a result they all became meandering blocks of text with no goal or direction. anyway. point being that i have embraced conflict as a necessary factor in storytelling and i hope this will mean no more seinfeldian fics, prompt or otherwise.

13. how do you hope to grow next year? yes <3 jk but i sincerely have no idea, i don’t have any current ideas on how i plan to grow next year i just very much intend to grow. how it happens is anyone’s guess

14. who was your greatest positive influence this year as a writer (could be another writer or beta or cheerleader or muse etc etc)? gotta be a tie between megs @igarbagecannoteven and hazel @allsassnoclass. obviously megs is my #1 rubber duck roomie, whether she likes it or not, and she has helped me solve more problems than i am comfortable admitting. actually i’m very comfortable admitting it megs has untangled a myriad of fic knots on many occasions this year she is the best rubber duck in the world. and hazel has become my virtual rubber duck which is great because it means i have all my bases covered! truly these two are a dynamic duo because they will both just let me sit there and complain and yet always have the right thing to say.

15. anything from your real life show up in your writing this year? as always, a great many things. make the same mistakes ‘til the morning breaks and the muke college beach fic are both inspired by things that happened with this one guy i know from school (yes, the same guy, and yes, he is represented by michael both times, and no, i do not know why it happened like that). the latter came from just a single snap i saw on his snap story, and none of the fic is actually based on real events, but the former is HEAVILY based on real events between this guy and one of my good friends at school. lmao! 

i’ve been wishing i could breathe underwater is based on my experience scuba diving, which is to say, pure unmitigated terror, 1/10, do not recommend except to say that you did it. tequila shots from the dark scene of the crime is chock-full of baseball talk, specifically about Worst Team In Baseball the Washington Nationals (affectionate), so those feelings are straight from my heart. the concept of tell me what to see has not happened to me but it was very much inspired by my experience of getting in the habit of working out and realizing your muscles are literally increasing in size. the christmas fic has all my jewish disdain for christmas. that’s the shortlist, i think!

16. any new wisdom you can share with other writers? honestly, nope! i think other writers are thriving on their own fic journeys, as i am on mine. you guys seem to have a handle on things. i can reiterate my vehement loathing of comma splices or otherwise incorrectly-placed commas, but other than that i don’t have much to offer in the way of wisdom.

17. any projects you’re looking forward to starting (or finishing) in the new year? yes!! i am really excited to (hopefully) finish this fic ive been intermittently writing that is based on back together by tss. well, actually it’s based on the specific energy that was created in the world when back together and 2011 were released on the same night. it’s a tss!5sos au. it’s going to be really good okay. it’s tasty. and as always i hope to finish summer camp au i am dead fucking set on finishing that fic there is no question in my mind that it will be completed someday sooner rather than later i hope but definitely eventually. aside from those, i can’t think of any other fic plans i have! just gonna see where the winds of fic fate take me.

18. tag some writers whose answers you’d like to read: @igarbagecannoteven @allsassnoclass @kaleidoscopeminds @burstingsunrise @cringeycal (?) <3

[huntingteeth]

ask and you shall receive :D

45. if you were on a 10 hour flight and could sit and talk to any person the entire time, who would it be?

46. when do you feel the most confident?

47. what do you do on your free time?

48. is there anyone who has completely lost your respect

49. have you ever broken someone’s heart?

50. did/do you play sports in school?

51. when are you happiest?

52. coffee or tea?

53. what is one possession you own you wouldn’t want to live without?

54. what is the first thing you notice about a person?

i searched ask game and just grabbed a bunch from the first one - feel free to answer as many or as few as you'd like!!

you’re truly a blessing 🥹

45. ignoring the flight part (lmao) if there was anyone i could talk to for 10 straight hours, my nerdy brain would probably want to talk to any education neuroscientist because that’s always my favorite part of going to conferences is the neuroscience/reading panel and it would be wild to be able to talk through all my nerdy interests with them lol but if we’re talking about a famous person maybe uh lmao idk. idk that i’m actually interested in talking to anyone who’s famous lmao. i gotta like know a person to be comfortable talking to them for 10 hours and then also i get super tired of talking to people for 10 hours. maybe lord byron so i could bully him for 10 hours.

46. in my professional life definitely. but also when i’m in a small group of people i like lmao. i get wildly anxious when i’m left on my own for too long (lol at having summers off of work) but when i’m around people who have the same type of humor that i have or who lmao like me as a person, i feel very confident

47. in my freeeee time, shit. i like cooking. i like hiking. i like read thicc nonfiction science or history books (my books for vacation are “the particle at the end of the universe” by sean carroll, “monsters” by edward regis, “decoding the heavens” by jo marchant, and then one of my fave books “seven brief lessons on physics” by carlo rovelli). am i gonna be able to read all of these on my trip? no but i’m gonna give it a go. and uh i guess writing too lmao. oh and any kind of like cross stitching, knitting, crocheting situation.

48. yeah lmao. i think it’s generally pretty hard to lose my respect because i’m usually pretty easygoing but i have a really strong sense of justice and once a person makes it to the point where we’re on opposing sides of whatever issue it is, it’s pretty easy for me to justify bopping them out of my life.

49. i don’t know! i don’t know if i want to know either. maybe when i broke up with my high school boyfriend bc i was going to a different college lmao but honestly i dodged such a bullet. i haven’t had a relationship with anyone since probably like i was 18 and in college and it’s been so great lmao.

50. i did color guard in the marching band and winter guard for three and a half months years in high school lmao. i’m not really a sports person lol.

51. i’m happiest at the beach. not in the ocean necessarily but laying in the sun with a book and a fun drink and maybe i can take a nap. that sounds great. i also dearly enjoy being the first person in a hiking group so i can pretend like i’m a will-o-wisp who’s luring other people deeper into the forest tbh. thrilling.

52. my favorite drink in this world is an unsweetened iced tea. i do drink coffee and enjoy it but if i had to choose between the two things, i’d choose the iced tea.

53. honestly probably my extensive shoe collection. that’s a really frivolous answer but what’s the point of life if we can’t be a little frivolous? i have jordans that i love love and probably about ten pairs of sam edelman pointy d’orsay flats and sometimes when i think about how much money i’ve sunk into shoes it is a little wild but we’ve only got the one life and we should be filling it with things that make us happy

54. if they have a good sense of humor, quickly followed up by if they’re kind.

[survivor-marieta-islands]

Episode 1: "Why do I hear Boss Music?"—Zee

Antigua

Steven

Hey y’all!!! I’m just your average line cook that is sweating his ass off in the summer heat. If I’m not working then I’m probably watching reality tv or playing something Pokémon related.

Ellie

HIIII have y'all missed me?? the original idol and immunity giving snake queen has returned to her throne of ninth place. I have missed this omg, I haven't been super active bc of college and shit but thankfully i am in an alliance (hate the feeling of not being in one) with my bestie baes Raffy and Colin called chaos CREw (see what we did there) I genuinely want to play with them and have us be f3 just bc i think it would be fucking hilarious!!! bye party people, ttyl

Jinx

AUGUST 10th, 2023 (2:22PM) CURRENTLY: Watching two GAY PEOPLE play Phasmophobia while queueing a playlist of 557 KPOP songs. BACKGROUND: This season Jinx wants to try to focus more on written confessionals as it’s what is most accessible for the majority of people and they did tell people in their intro that they’re a writer, afterall. In an effort to bring some humor, honesty and flair to their Survivor Stings ORG experience they are trying to adopt their detective persona from Raccoon City in the voice of Noir Spiderman from Spiderverse (with some Barbie energy tbh). It is very very likely that they’ll abandon or forget or just be completely against this persona fearing it is cringe beyond measure – but they may also keep it up as it’s kinda fun. Either way, they’re writing and that is a feat. A writer who doesn’t write is simply a flop.

LMAOO ANYWAYS I don’t know how to be serious in this type of way completely but I was feeling myself when writing the above so I will accept it and move on. If I’m not consistent with it, at least I tried! Which is really what this season is about on a personal level for me. It’s about meeting myself where I’m at. I expressed to Jay in my confessional that I’m frustrated at the current state of personal affairs even if it is temporary.

Coming into this season of Stings, I feel like I have a lot to give back and a lot left to express. Two seasons in a row, while I have nothing to regret about the games I have played – I have regrets about the personal relationships I have failed to maintain and the ones I failed to cultivate. I remember everyone from both seasons, I actually do care about them, I also know that these personal feelings may not align with others personal feelings about me. That it might not be what other people feel from me due to my absence. Due to my inability to have a good social game particularly last season. Saying yes to Stings this season, I was optimistic about the direction my life was heading and still am. More so, about the environments, the time I’d have, the attitude I’d come in with. It wouldn’t be burdened with the same struggle I have come into the last two seasons with and in a way – it isn’t.

In a way, I am simply sick of my own shit which may add to the judgment I am placing on myself. Not only judgment but the idea that my presence was really of THAT much importance to anyone in or out of game. I wanted to be much more confident and self assured that I would be different this time, not just disappear post season because of life circumstances as if not everyone has life get in the way. I know now I am still being kinder to myself than I have in the past – I do not write this with actual anger towards myself, striking disappointment, deep frustration but with a heavy sigh of here we go again. Though, with this awareness I know I can change my actions for the better. Even if I fail, I can try again. There’s an air of compassion that I’ve cultivated with and for myself. It’s definitely different than over a year ago when I first played Stings.

When I first played Stings – it was because Amy begged me to. Around six people had dropped out and she just needed a body, someone to play and be there. Paired with Raffy hosting – it was an easy sell. When falling down the rabbit hole of Survivor Stings, I didn’t expect to love an ORG or an environment or cast this much. I had just moved out, I was a mess on a level I knew of but never was allowed to investigate due to not being in a safe environment for so long until then. As I investigated, I was playing Survivor Stings. It’s weird to think that I am such a different person than I was even a year ago because as I’ve written this I don’t think I’ve given myself any faith, credit or hope that I am. I don’t even think I’ve expressed the changes and turns my life and myself have taken. I am so used to the disappointment that comes with failing that I forget how much I’ve succeeded and how far I’ve come. These are old narratives we sometimes tell ourselves when we don’t know how to write new ones. When we don’t know what the new ones will be. When it feels too scary to step into the greatness that we have earned because we are scared we are not worthy of it.

See me? I like knowing. To jump into the unknown always seems like a step back, even if I am of the risk taking variety, I like to take risks that are calculated. Moving cross country the way I have was the most uncalculated risk I have ever taken in my life and while it paid off – for every action there is an equal and opposite reaction. This oversight has caused me to feel a fear I haven’t since I moved out, I have seen as I have fallen into old patterns that are just really indicative of what my comfort zone is and why I need it currently. Even though I sometimes sit in doubt thinking I cannot break the cycle, I know I already have many times before. I know that I will, again and again. I wanted to come into Survivor Stings this time without thinking of all this. I guess that was my mistake, to think that playing an online Survivor game wouldn’t unearth something in me as it always does. This time though – I am the least certain of what it (the unearthed) will be than I ever have been. For once, I’m not really sure who I’ll be at the end of this game (because yes, I hope and plan to be at the end of this game) and it doesn’t completely scare me to not know. Maybe I’ll let myself down. Maybe I’ll surpass my expectations more than I could have ever imagined. Maybe I’ll be first boot. Either way, I don’t know and I am not trying to control it. That’s how I’m coming into this game.

I’ve only played one other ORG this entire calendar year – which is a feat for me. I go into ORGs with a lot more intentionality now, though it may seem so serious to me to be writing this all – it’s just how I am as a person. Hyper verbal, overly invested, able to detach quickly and grateful for the opportunity to be attached to an ORG I admire so much. I love these games, no matter how many bad experiences I have (which are plenty), no matter how many times ORGs have made me abuse my Xanax prescription, I will never say I will retire. They connect me to a part of myself that I felt was long gone, they connect me to so many people who have changed my life for the better. I think sometimes the point is to show up for yourself where you’re at when playing these games and not detach from it because we won’t take much from these games otherwise. For me, ORGs are a practice of being present with myself, learning other people, playing a game that is fun and brings out parts of me to overanalyze and understand. To win doesn’t mean getting first place to me – though that would be nice this time around – to win would be to at peace with myself. To know I played the best game I possibly could, that I am proud of the game I played, that I know I rose to the occasion and didn’t shy away from it.

During FTC last season, in my closing speech I quoted something along the lines of: Faith isn’t free – it costs us our cynicism and demands we spend a lifetime practicing it. I have been in constant practice of feeding my cynicism to the abyss, hoping that the faith I cultivate from letting go of it is no longer blind but earned. No matter what, this is what I aim to practice this season. Faith. In myself, my decisions, my intuition and my gameplay. I think it’s time for me to let go of the fears, the imposter syndrome, the trauma and move forward because this is a chance to practice. We don’t get enough chances to practice this delicate process in everyday life. This is what I am protecting, this is what drives me to get to the end of this game. In this current life transition, the knowledge that this isn't permanent and I have the honor of shaping my game, myself, my future in however way I want to. I want to lead with faith. As I write that, I cry. Because I am so scared to put this into practice but that’s exactly why I have to. I deserve to give myself the chance. XOXO, Gossip Jinx

eman

I know I say this every time but this time I really mean it.

It's vibes.

No plans.

I'm gonna let the game carry me.

What happens happens.

Promise.

🫡

Colin

WOOO GO GERIATRIC TRIBE

the game started last night and i'm LOVING this. so many old jokes to be made. and made they shall be. some of these people are so old that I don't even know them, and i've been around since the birth of christ.

pre season i said that if I didn't have a night one alliance then i would have failed. and unfortunately i failed. but i do have the groundwork for several partnerships. Ellie broke the ice by saying f2, so that's a thing. I love working with Ellie but sometimes they're too chaotic for their own good.

I had a great lil game talk with Steven last night. we agreed that we're gonna play this game naturally, and just accept that previous relationships are going to be a factor (i mean its a fucking all stars game). Usually we try to avoid each other because everyone just EXPECTS us to work together, but none of that this time. I'd love to work closely with Steven, I've never gotten the chance to before.

I spent like 45 mins on the call with jinx after everyone else left, we bonded over past org trauma and both of us living in missouri. it was a nice lil meeting. I think I can see myself wanting to work with them. they're very interesting.

and ofc I wanna work with Amy. Amy is an absolute treasure to the community. AND WE LIVE LIKE 30 MINS FROM EACH OTHER??! so we've already planned to attend some tribals together and meet up for some coffee. it'll be such a gag. i'm excited.

thats what I got for first impressions. gonna spend the rest of the day playing flash games and seeing what else I can learn about people and how they feel about the game.

bye bye

Amy

The Olds tribe is ICONIC and I literally do not want to go to tribal so I hope we win. I am also currently playing a two day mini right when this game started so I haven't been great with initial connections. Just banking on the fact that I know most people to get me through for now. This whole cast is iconic. Gonna be a fun one!

Jinx

oh i have GOT to rethink playing orgs and working full time. thinking i need to quit my job -- thoughts? bad idea, right?

Steven

There is a lot of people from T&T here which is kinda stressful since it literally just happened. Will there be drama from last season going to affect this one? Who knows but it’s definitely not what I was hoping for when signing up for this game. I will say that I am thankful to be old. The last few games I felt a need to hide my past in orgs and play down aspects of it but since everyone on the tribe has played them for years I don’t see a need to lie about it. Hopefully with being able to be more free to talk about my past I will be able to connect to everyone easier. Also there is a decent amount of stings winners on the tribe which is also a benefit and since I don’t think I need to hide that I have won in the past as a worry for putting a target on my back. My biggest worry right now is im busy today so im not as social as I want to be. The plan is once I finish work tomorrow is to put my social game into full gear and get everyone to love me. I just need to do it before results are posted so it doesn’t look sus and im just doing to not get booted. From the looks of it though we are up a point (thanks to me) and are on track for two more. Cross my fingers and wish me luck

Maddison

HI HELLO SLUTS (not derogatory) Let's seeee what's goin on. I'm doing a MID job at socializing with everyone tbh I have a total of zero (read: zero) alliances at this point which is ~ not awesome ~ but I've been a busy adult sooooo anywho. Lots of people on this tribe with pre-existing relationships which could play out in a multitude of ways. Raffy is hella consistent with reaching out and is defo social butterflying through this thing right now. Jinx is CUTIE absolutely love them. I'm currently pretending to semi-care about Taylor Swift (i do not) but I think I'm doing a decent job heheh. I've talked to several other people but honestly haven't gotten too far into any discussions and I've had not one single strategy conversation yet. :-) flop era activated. This is so chaotic but I've had three cups of coffee and am just pretending this is my journal. What else uuuuhmmmm one of my biggest mistakes during TDF was not talking to everyone on the tribe at the top. I need to rectify that this go around but haven't gotten there yet. Maybe this evening I can dedicated some time to networking lmfaooo. Okay that's all. Stay tuned folks happy Sunday <3

eman

Remember how I said on day one that it was no strategy only vibes and that I was only gonna see where the game took me.

And how swear to god this time I was serious.

I was a lying liar who lied.

Day two saw me up at the buttcrack of dawn to go to a National park and also trying to get a photo of an alpaca.

It still didn't do any good. We still lost the scavenger hunt.

Thank god we still won as a team for other reasons.

I'm all crankypants about losing the scavenger hunt though.

But at least we're still winning as a team.

And hopefully other team vibes will carry me through. I'm not willing to name names yet.

Yet.

Colin

WOOO WE WON THE CHALLENGE. i'm so glad because I feel like if this tribe of icons was going to tribal so soon, it'd be an absolute toss up. everyone is really formidable and I don't think anyone would be leaving without a fight.

i've been talking game a little bit here and there. i talked with raffy today and we came up with a little plan for securing our spots on the tribe.

we both LOVE amy and jinx, so we're gonna try to align with them. honestly I was wanting to make a missouri alliance with amy and jinx anyway, and i'm certainly not opposed to working with raffy.

i was talking to ellie yesterday and they mentioned the cursed idea of us + raffy + steven. except I dont think it's that cursed. I think i'd actually love to work with all of them. I really wanna make it work between Steven and I, we've never gotten a chance to work so closely before.

SO we're also gonna try to set up a side alliance with those four. I think the raffy + amy + jinx will be my main alliance, but covering all my possible bases is great. the tribe is still pretty big so working with a lot of people is smart, otherwise you'll get blindsided by the people you're not working with.

JG

Steven

Zoe

hi hello WHAT THE HELL AM I DOING BACK HERE IN SURVIVOR I really and truly am a chicken with my head cut off this round I forget how to play BUT I do feel that I'm building good social bonds with a few people which could make for me being an excellent göat xoxo Also thank heck we didn't have to go to the first tribal because I'm positive I would have been voted out lol

eman

Feelings and all . . . where would eman be without feelings. I dunno, man.

Idol hunt started and I found a backpack that had a metal detector and because I'm a Scorpio who can't keep a secret I went running. Why'd I go running to Amy, I don't even know, something told me to and that SOMETHING was right . . .

Cuz Amy had already been idol hunting and she got somewhere that said she needed a metal detector and whadaya know she's now let me in on her idol hunting.

So . . . maybe something's gonna happen . . .

We'll see.

It's weird that I'm pathologically incapable of carrying on a simple conversation IRL and yet incredibly good at the social game in Stings.

This tribe is nice.

Soup to nuts.

Raffy

This game is going to be intense from start to finish. I can feel it. I'm going to have to be extremely strategic to navigate through this mess. Here is my first impression of the cast:

1. Colin: We have never really gotten the chance to work together deep into a game. I feel like when we work together we always end up never going far together lol. Maybe that means I should not work with them, but I will try to feel them out. I can definitely see them being able to play more low-key and navigate easily through this tribe. Definitely not a name that can be thrown out easily.

2. Ellie: It is not a question of "if"; it is a question of "when" Ellie and I will work together. We always manage to get backed into the same corners in games so we also end up being forced to work together. I know if I need someone to flip or give me information, I can rely on them to give me what I need. What will be interesting is if we land on different sides. Though I can see Eman adopting Ellie and Ellie working with Maddison, Jinx, and Zo. Honestly I think Ellie has the most open game on my tribe so I think I want to get on their good side for the time being.

3. Eman: I don't know where I stand with Eman. I'm unsure if they will come for me for being amazing. I'll have to feel them out and get to know them more. However, currently, they are on my shortlist of people to get voted out of this tribe only because I am really unsure where I would stand.

4. Jinx: Jinx is going to be loyal to me 1000% if I am loyal to them back. However, I really don't know if I want to work with Jinx in this game because I like to shake things up and I don't know if our goals will align with who we want to work with. I wanna see who they get on with. I also worry that Jinx will be a late pre-merge boot if they get swap screwed. Though it is incredibly hard to turn down a guaranteed number and safety.

5. Maddison: A person I've never played with before! Her and Zo are the wildcards of the group. I just have a strong feeling they will work with Ellie and Zo. Those 3 kind of give off similar energy. But, I might want to be the fourth in that alliance. I really don't wanna vote her out, but she would be on my shortlist if it came down it.

6. JG: JG is a great guy. He's very loyal which is good. He hasn't been too online for the premiere which is always a worry since people might see you as inactive. But, he has a board game night with his friends so we'll see. I just don't know how JG will fit into any combination of alliances with people so I think he might already be on the outs? But that's just my worry since I do wanna work with him, I just don't see who would want to work with him with me. I'll put him on the shortlist of people too only because I feel like everyone would.

7. Steven: I love Steven so much. Do I want to work with Steven this game? Honestly I am not sure. I love talking to him so would love to get the chance to work with him again, but idk I get the vibe we might be on different sides. I think he'll definitely try to work with Colin and Amy. He might even bring in JG. Maybe that's the side that opposes the Ellie, Maddison, Zo (and maybe Eman) side that I've already conjured up in my head.

8. Zo: I want to work with her so bad. I've only talked with her for like 10 minutes, but I can already tell she's great and will be beneficial. Seems like an easy person to get along with and will be a way in for people I don't talk to. Very social butterfly. Very much how Ellie and I work together. I just hope she vibes with me. I would hate to be on opposite sides.

9. Amy: I fucking stan Amy so hard. I would love to work with Amy in this game. I kind of want to push Amy as my shield and cut her near the end so that I can win. A little bit of role reversal on my part. We'll have to see what her schedule is like though for this game as that kinda determines her activity lol.

Overall, I feel pretty good about this tribe. I think most people will see me as helpful rather than detrimental for the pre-merge phase. I think if I just chill and not game too hard that I'll be able to survive at least all of pre-swap. I'm too valuable during the pre-merge to let go at this point in time.

The other tribe definitely has some characters and threats. I do not trust Clefford, putting that out there. He's a devious little scamp. Trinica is an icon and would love to work with them, but I think we need to work together in pre-merge first because I wanna establish a rapport with them before I work with them in this game. AJ and Zee are definitely on my shortlist only because they are literally so chaotic that I think Ellie would be swayed into joining them. If they made it to merge, it's gonna be Ellie, Maddison, AJ, Zee, and Zo. Oh and Adeline is probably ALREADY working with AJ and Zee so add them onto that alliance too lol. Ellie is foaming at the mouth to work with Adeline again. I already know. Just watch. Love seeing Hairie and Brandi back. I feel like they are going to work together.

Sin Sazonar

Trinica

First impression: FUCK Second impression: DOUBLE FUCK

Basically, all the cool cats are on the oldies tribe, so my little babies tribe is screwed in this first challenge. Clefford wasn't around to pick a category so got put on pro gamers when he doesn't have a freaking computer and then immediately submitted super low scores instead of talking to his teammates about it, Shawn asked to do Popularity but seems to have only posted on social media instead of in VLs, Hairie was on trivia because he was quite literally the only one of us willing to do it who seemed to have seen a ton of Survivor but he lost because Steven is a superfan, and Tanner has now been moved to the scavenger hunt, a challenge he historically flopped on in Trinidad & Tobago. Like he only submitted 2 items and didn't do them correctly so didn't get any points for it. The ONLY section I think we have a chance at is 3-2-1.

It's honestly just hard to fight against the other tribe! They've been playing orgs longer than us, they're more familiar with Stings as a series, they likely have some challenge know-how/strategy that we don't. I have never played these flash games in my life. You know who probably has played them for hours and hours? Colin and Raffy. And maybe JG but I don't know them.

Not just that, this season is basically North Sea Reunion, which puts me at an immediate disadvantage. Maaaybe I'd have a shot if I was with Jinx and Raffy (or Colin and Steven since I've hosted them). But no, I'm stuck on a tribe with Zee who has seen me blindside AJ, AJ who has been blindsided by me, Hairie who has been blindsided by me, Clefford who has been blindsided by me, Arvin who has been blindsided by me, and Brandi who I never played with but who knows I won. Plus Tanner, who is tight with Hairie and AJ, and Del, who has connections to Clefford and Hairie. I just don't see a world in which A) we don't lose, and B) I'm not first boot.

Some may say I'm being defeatist (*cough* Jay *cough*) but I think I'm being realistic. This is a season I am simply not destined to go far in. My only hope is to convince people I'm good at challenges so should be kept until merge, and I'm a good meat shield.

Tanner

I’m feeling connected to Adeline others there isn’t game talk

Zee

Ok so right now I'm kind of feeling like a kid on their first day of school in a new school, I don’t know anyone and I want to make friends but it seems like everyone already knows each other and I’m just the new kid on the block. I am however taking this new game as a new leaf, since I want to play this game the way I should have played my last one, more trusting, giving, and openhearted. Imma slay the same though, the slay levels are remaining how they are now. Oh and I found that little clue in the rules for the idol hunt so I’m interested to see what that turns out to be :p

AJ

Starting this off with an early round one confessional bc why the hell not. Starting out I’m definitely not in a great position, if for the sole reason of I’m on Zee’s tribe. Which is not good. Yeah we say we don’t want to play with each other in the chats and everything, but I’m sure there’ll still be a general assumption/rumor that we’re gonna work together. Given, yk, the whole twin thing.

To be honest I’m not sure if I will be working with her, but we’ll see how alliance making plays out. I think the important thing for me is that she believes I’m playing with her. Given how chaotic she was last season and the somewhat generally negative perception she had, I really don’t think openly being an ally of hers is beneficial, but again, we’ll see what happens.

Also sidenote: I am scared about how many people I do not know on the other tribe.

I think this season I’ll start ranking people’s threat levels to my own game, because again, why not? At this starting point I’m going to just list people, my general vibe and thoughts about them at this point in the game, and also their threat level to my game right now and why I have put them there. (It’s a 1-5 scale - the higher the number the more dangerous)

General thoughts so far. I’m hesitant to work with Trinica bc she’s turned on me in two games now, we’ve got a hesitant thing going with working together for jury but idk if it’ll hold. Worried about Clefford since I didn’t speak to him for 10 months which is literally since we blindsided him. Hairie and Arvin I’m hopeful about. Hairie is a king and we stan. Arvin I kind of lied to constantly last game but he worked with us in the end. He’s probably closer to Trinica or Hairie than me at this point though. Shawn, Brandi, and Adeline I really don’t have any idea about - so I’m hoping to connect with them.

Tanner is the shining light in all of this, because I feel like with a little bit of work I can definitely have him on my side. He’s probably closer to me than anyone else in the game at this point, though I’m not sure who else he’s played with. But he seemed to be on good terms with me when we last spoke so. Fingers crossed we don’t lose and I don’t end up as first boot.

AJ

Talked with Trinica some more, I think maybe we can have a solid Jury pact, I hope so. Hairie I can’t quite trust I don’t think, he’s defs a villain esp given what Trinica is saying from watching his host chat. Him and arvin are an alliance to keep an eye on, and also him and Tanner who are apparently closer than I thought. Hopefully I can get a lot of people close to me. It would be really nice to win one of these things. Esp Stings, esp after last time lol.

Arvin

Hey Stings Fam. I'm back! I am so excited to play again, There's a lot of players from my original season and I wonder who's willing to work with me this time, since we all know how we played last time. I feel confident with our tribe that we can win the first immunity but I'm a bit worried that we haven't lock in our tasks yet. I also don't feel confident doing any of the challenges, so if I have to pick one it would be the TikTok got it challenge but it seems like the twins (AJ and Zee) won't let go of it because of the so called twin telepathy. My other choice would be the Stings classic first challenge, scavenger hunt. So I hope I end up doing it. I just hope for the best.

Clefford

My tribe is obviously The North Sea reunion. I was expecting this tribe to have unfamiliar faces, but I just got disappointed. Well, what can I do? Let's just face them.

CAST IMPRESSION

Good thing is that I have my co-Pinoy here, Arvin. I also know Hairie and Tanner in the ORG community. I'm actually shocked to learn that Zee is AJ's twin. They're both pretty and fun, so I'm putting extra effort to connect with them. I also had a chat with Trinica that I'd like to work with her this time. I'm happy to see Adeline, my Racoon City sister, and hopefully consider working again with me. I'll try to get into Shawn and Brandi's vibes, so hopefully they'll be around soon.

Seeing OLD TRIBE (yes, all caps) is pretty exciting. I would love to stay longer, so that I can interact with them. Unfortunately, Jinx is also playing this season. I don't know, but I'm kinda scared of her just the thought of she'll target me if we meet. I'm too kind to be treated that way *cries*. I wish that it's a clean slate between us.

CHALLENGE

Since I was late in the marooning, I got assigned to be in Pro-Gamers category where I had to play 3 challenges under that, and unfortunately, the challenges weren't designed to be played on mobile and I don't have a Laptop (Dear Santa, kidding) so I had to look an hour for a computer cafe to rent in my area. Premerge, I'm a tribe strong kind of player so challenges are really important for me to win to keep me and my tribe safe.

AJ

Day 2 and I’m already somewhat concerned. I thought I was doing alright, had some decent conversations with Hairie, Arvin, and surprisingly Clefford. However, I was informed by Zee that both today and yesterday all three of them had already been saying how Trinica and I are tight. I’m not sure how true that is/if that’s true - but it does leave me somewhat worried because I don’t want that to be a general perception out of the gate.

Also according to Hairie a lot of people are speculating about the twin thing, and I’ve straight up confirmed to Brandi that Zee and I live together. Which is another thing that concerns me because like, people are going to think we’re working together so much and I really don’t want that. When we’re together we’re always “the twins” and I really don’t want that to be a thing.

Now, despite my concerns, I’m in two alliance chats. One that Trinica created with Zee and I - jokingly titled the same thing Zee’s host chat was called last season. The second one is titled Timezone Hell, and it is just a trash fire (lovingly.) In it is me, Zee, Clefford (who we blindsided in North Sea), Hairie (who I lied to at team captain, and in amethyst, and at merge and then blindsided him), and Arvin (who I lied to throughout the entire swap and merge, up until I eliminated him.) I trust zero of these people.

Do I think I’m first boot if we go to tribal? I worry that that’ll be the case. I hope not, but it’s my fear. I think my only hope is a swap where I can reunite with Jinx (we stan, I miss them), or Raffy, or even Colin and Steven. Eman is also someone I really want to work with, esp with us having a good connection from DnD. But gah, I just don’t even know what to do or who I’m going to work with. It feels like we’re gonna go to tribal already so I’m trying to make a game plan but goddamn if I’m not struggling.

Zee

Why do I hear Boss Music? That’s what’s going through my head right now. Before we got into the challenge we were all like “oh cool Old School vs New School” no, not cool, mission abort. What we failed to realize was that this now means we are most likely going to get pagonged due to the sheer amount of experience in these games the Mega-Time Returneees over on Antigua have. I can feel it, The Pagonging is among us. As far as people go, AJ and Trinica are fun but it does kinda feel weird talking to them considering they DID host my last game. I’d love to talk to Shawn and Adeline more, hopefully we vibe when they’re both back from vacation. Brandi also seems really nice, and like always I’d love to try an all female alliance, but probably gonna hold off on that a bit.

Shawn

So far, the game has already begun and it's starting fast. Everyone is already getting to know each other or they already know each other. I feel like I missed a huge chapter and it hasn't even been 24 hours. I think I might vote Tanner as my least connect. He doesn't seem to put in the effort. But who knows, the game just started.

Brandi

There is no chance of us winning the games part of the challenge no matter who is playing on sin sazonar- if I remember anything Raffy is amazing at the games

Shawn

So I wake up this morning from a text from Hairie saying "you've been away awhile, home you're enjoying your vacation 💕" which maybe it's the passive aggressive in me that read that as passive aggressive. I respond everyday, I'm working on my part, I haven't really been away THAT much. Maybe I'm reading into it, maybe it's just a nice message, but those are my morning thoughts.

AJ

I may have turned something around?? I told Hairie what Zee said about him spreading shit about Trinica and I, I also told him about Clefford being weird this morning. It seems like he’s now super sus of them (hopefully) and may want to get one of them out if (being real probably when) we go to tribal. Which is very good for me. No I don’t have any reason to feel bad about potentially voting Zee out. This is an all star season and that means big moves and taking risks. If that means leaving your twin high and dry so be it.

One of two things is happening. Either she’s being truthful, I’m an idiot, and I go home first. Or she’s doing what was done to her by Kaleigh last season and making stuff up to purposefully keep me close to her. There’s a probability Hairie isn’t spreading Trinica and AJ are close propaganda, and even if he is, knowing Zee isn’t tight lipped about it will definitely make her a bigger threat than me. If I can get him to want to go against them, which he already proposed, I’m golden.

To seal the deal, add a little cherry on top some might say, I also let him know what Clefford said about Tanner as a potential vote, which I already knew Hairie wouldn’t like - since Trinica had already told me about his soft spot/soreness on the topic of Tanner being first boot. I also don’t want Tanner to go - he’s closer to me and Hairie than he’d be to other people, and he willingly tells me about his connections. I also let him know that Zee flat out said we need to eliminate Tanner, which again, had the desired outcome. Now if everything goes well with it - and assuming we attend tribal council, here’s what we could do.

Hairie, Arvin, and I, vote for Zee - we can figure out how to get Arvin on board somehow. Maybe just say she can’t be trusted? That’s a different bridge to cross.

We can tell Shawn that their name got thrown out by Clefford for being inactive despite them being on vacation. Shawn was second boot, and hasn’t played since - thus there’ll hopefully be some, ok well what do we do now. They’ll potentially vote for Clefford. Brandi might still be close enough to Hairie to vote for Zee or Clefford. Trinica will defs be on board to vote for Clefford, because at this point it seems like neither of us trust him. Tanner can get told that Zee and Clefford are both wanting to vote him, and Clefford thinks he can control Tanner.

Adeline knows and worked with Clefford in Racoon City, and knows a lot of people on the other side. That’s definitely something to look out for. We probably can’t tell her about the vote.

Tanner has stated he really dislikes being controlled, by Sam in particular, and will most likely want to eliminate the people spreading his name. We could probably get Clefford out using this method. That’s 4-3 (Clefford-Zee) and is majority either way, even if the other 3 votes are Tanner.

Now this is good because if Clefford manages to find an idol with his early idol hunting access, then he either uses it and Zee goes home in a revote, or he doesn’t use it and goes home. Will this probably change after I have other conversations with other people? Yes. Does this mean that I could potentially get out Zee/Clefford if we go to tribal if I need to? Also yes. So yeah. Feeling tentatively okay about the inevitability of us losing.

AJ

The more I think about it though, the more sense it makes for Clefford to be the one out of the two to go home. Adeline doesn’t want a femme/them to go out first, and I honestly agree, so new idea is finding a way for it not to be me, Zee, and potentially for it to be Clefford.

We’re almost definitely going to tribal so. Time to start scheming.

--

Well results are out. So much has happened since then. Our tribe heard tribal council and really said “bet.” So I guess we’ll go in chronological order of events.

First Zee created a chat for all the non-men without asking half of the people she placed in it. She seems close to Adeline who has mentioned she won’t vote a non-man out first. Which means I should be safe but also means she won’t go along with the plan that’s slowly slowly coming together. Anyway back to the order of events. So Zee has this chat. Shawn and Brandi both say they’re already thinking someone to vote. They say it on three. Brandi says Tanner (big surprise everyone knew he was a name going around) and Shawn says Hairie. HAIRIE. My boy. Anyway I obviously can’t have either of those things. So I’m like oh Shawn idk I’d be more wary of Clefford bc he mentioned your name. Shawn thinks I mean Hairie. And everything hits the fan.

So while I’m running interference of pushing Clefford’s name while trying to look like I’m not pushing Clefford’s name, and making sure Tanner isn’t the vote, and making sure Hairie isn’t the vote - I’m also trying to figure out on the fly how I’m supposed to deal with Hairie’s cryptic but definitely worrying messages in the tribe chat. Shawn seems to have decided to confront Hairie, and clear the air or something, and Hairie was like I’m sorry wtf is happening. Telling Hairie the tea and that his name is out there turns from a soon thing to an even sooner thing out of safety for my own game.

I make it seem like I only said Clefford because he was fine with it earlier and it was that or Arvin who no one would believe. And I made it seem like I wasn’t actively pushing for Clefford. Now, after thinking Clefford was a good choice and telling Tanner it might have been a better choice than voting for Zee, I thought to myself. What if I told Clefford his name was out there. Then I thought, well who would the target be? Zee. Hairie would be on board, I’ve since talked to him about it.

Trinica is allegedly on board. Tanner is on board. Brandi is on the fence but when Hairie wakes up and if he can convince her then that there is five. If we get Arvin that’s six, seven if we have Clefford on board. We may get Shawn - Hairie has mentioned speaking to them about it. If we pull this off it will be iconic and really improve my game in terms of not being seen as a set. Twins are a problem the longer they’re together seems to be the general consensus, if I can play without that being an issue that would be ideal.

And if I get screwed by this oh well. At least I’m attempting to make a big move. At least I’m playing the game. A femmes and thems alliance getting Clefford out is a repeat of North Sea, and I’m not looking to replay that. If this bites me I can’t really be mad though. Hopefully it doesn’t.

TL;DR - Am I the drama? Maybe.

Zee

So Hairie just caused some D R A M A in the tribe chat which is wild, and now apparently my name is out on the table coming from Tanner’s mouth. We’ve also got a Yellowjackets alliance which is very interesting. After the drama I got a pretty passive aggressive message from Hairie and that confused me because I thought we were on good terms, and I didn’t really do anything to him so that kind of made me a bit sad. I’ve really just been trying to be friendly with everyone so that’s kind of very interesting.

--

I have Alex as a guest in my VL! Very exciting, since I feel like his insight is going to be useful, and it’ll be nice to have an outside opinion on everything that’s going on. I think I’ll talk to him about the Hairie situation and see what insight he has.

--

Ok so Alex provided good insight, I was wondering if it seemed strange, how Hairie was acting and all, and apparently he thinks it’s out of pocket too so at least I’m not reading into things. Sadly I really like Hairie he seems like a fun person to work with so I hope I can get to the bottom of all this. :((

--

Wowie. So I just found some big news out from Hairie. I woke up to a message with an apology, but then the boston teaparty of teas happened. SO. Apparently he pushed my name due to some misinformation that was going around. I originally got the assumption that it was Trinica, as AJ suggested that too, and since Trinica did something similar to AJ in North Sea I believed it. HOWEVER my dearest Hairie has said that it was AJ, my own twin, who is spreading the rumor and has been spreading it for days that I’m telling people that hairie is spreading a twin thing and I’m not ok with that. Meanwhile me and Hairie haven’t talked any game, and I never heard a twin convo from anyone. So me and Hairie are now comparing notes, and it’s opened my eyes A LOT. We’re now discussing a vote after our comparison of notes.

AJ

I’m honestly kind of nervous about tribal. I feel like there could definitely be some pull for Zee going home. Hairie, who I do actually want to work with, doesn’t know who to trust. Which is honestly valid but also…man it’s just so tough. I don’t want to lead the charge, but I also feel like it may help me be more trusted? Also as always I’m worried I might go home. I learned last season that it’s so easy to get absolutely blindsided, so these may be my only confessionals of the season lmfao.

Current vibe is, Shawn, Brandi, Trinica and I could have a potential little alliance chat on the horizon. I’m not sure - but if we four work together and pull in Tanner we at least have 5 for a Zee vote. Hairie is allegedly down for that too, which would be an easy six. Seven if he pulls in Arvin. IF - and it’s a big if - I’m not being lied to. God I’m about to be OTT in edgic for SURE. I’m gonna be surprised if I’m not.

Crossing all my fingers and toes that I can pull this off and I’m not bit in the ass because of it.

Zee

So it would seem that the vote has shifted to Adeline. Hairie and I had a call after we compared notes, and we talked it out too, he said I seem very chill and fun, when before he couldn’t tell the tone. We added Clefford to the call and now and just like with Hairie I just decided to be like fully honest. I mentioned how I spoke with AJ about wanting an all non-men alliance, and how she was like “yeah lol create it” and how tbh it was actually my bad because I forgot that one step is actually ASKING everyone if they wanted to be in an alliance so that’s a whoopsie daisy on my part. I have also learned that AJ is HARD PUSHING my name, like girly calm down. I also learned that Trinica apparently asked Hairie to do the trivia since nobody else would step up, which was surprising because when Adeline said that he wasn’t putting effort and he was putting pressure, Trinica didn’t say anything in his defense, so she seems ok with that perception of him out in the gamesphere. Hairie, Clefford, and I all ended up comparing notes, and it seems like we’ve made an alliance, calling ourselves the Chopping Block. I spilled literally all the tea I have to them, so I hope that doesn’t bite me in the ass. I told Hairie that I 100% am voting with him, and for this, I told him to prove it that I’d write a specific phrase as my voting message. This is the one I told him “I just realized that, when it's dark out, the stars shining looks like little jellyfish populating the ocean of the night”. I think I’ll send that in the ChopBloc alliance chat. We need to convince the others to vote for Adeline too, otherwise it’s probably me, Hairie, or Clefford going home.

Brandi

THIS IS SO CHAOTIC

Shawn

Clearly everyone is popping off. Everyone is losing their shit and like I don't even know. This game definitely didn't go like last time. Zee is.. completely unreliable. Not trusting Clefford either. I feel like I've been a little messy too in my Dms and stuff. I'm not sure what to think of this but I know Brandi and Trinica are trustworthy. And my sweet jay, but they are the host. Honestly I'm just hoping my name don't get said, and that I can finish my work day in peace.

Trinica

i'mma do a tier list of most dramatic/chaos-inducing tribe members to least:

1. Zee (duh, who's surprised) 2. Hairie (i actually am surprised) 3. AJ (surprised about her causing chaos, not surprised at her already being a target, we love a predictable queen) 4. Adeline (instinct is to be chill but went to the tribe chat to bring things to the open when she found out zee was saying her name so that's why she's higher on the list) 5. Brandi (leaking everything to Hairie) 6. Clefford (being surprisingly chill for Clefford tbh but also made the first alliance chat i'm pretty sure and also saying lots of names to lots of people, zero loyalty) 7. Me (mostly telling jokes to help defuse tension, also a little bit stirring pots here and there as i get the whim but mostly trying not to say a lot because these people never listened when taylor swift said loose lips sink ships all the damn time) 8. Tanner (literally pre-voted yesterday despite the rule being we can't change our votes lmao, very much outside the drama but also telling a few lies) 9. Shawn (just doesn't want to be boot #1 or 2, staying out of things otherwise) 10. Arvin (calm king, literally sleeping)

Hairie

--

Zee

OK SO SHIT LITERALLY HIT THE FAN. While I didn’t want Adeline to go home, I was willing to vote her if that’s what it took. Ever since the alliance was created it was getting leaked, and I was told that Brandi, Shawn, and Trinica all complained to Hairie about it being made. But regardless, the chat got messy and I think things were being leaked from every alliance chat that existed, so, yeah. Due to this I think it’s highly unlikely that I’ll be kept in this game, but I’ve said that I do want to work to rebuild trust, because tbh I never really meant to break anyone’s trust, and I really did want to work with a majority of the people in those chats. I do think that I could use a good night’s rest though, so I’m going to prevote for Clefford since his messy behavior is what caused all this mess in the first place. I am very interested to know who was leaking information in the beginning-middle of the alliance though, but I guess I’ll see that when all these confessionals do get published in the end. I did end up leaking things when comparing notes, but it was after the alliance was already basically leaked through to entirety, yet still I’ve accepted and acknowledged my part in the alliance chat, so…Anyway this is probably my last confession but we’ll see.

[mattatouile]

🎢🙋‍♀️💖💥💔

🎢 Which of your fics would you call your wildest ride? Oooh. God, my fics are so sedate. I guess the time I wrote a roommates threesome fic where they all paired up as a buildup to the actual threesome. It's not that wild tbh. My fics tend to be more of a sedate stroll in a meadow lmao.

🙋‍♀️ Do any irl people know you write fanfic? HERES A FUN STORY. So okay. A couple of my early GoT fanfics ended up on Syfy.com and BookRiot as recs for JB fic during s7 of the show. This is not a bragging thing, I was and am far from like a BNF or whatever. But my wife was super proud of me and had a couple of cocktails AND TOLD MY PARENTS AND MOTHER IN LAW THAT MY SMUT FIC GOT RECOMMENDED ON SYFY.COM AT DINNER. I wanted to die. But yeah, pretty much anyone that's family or close friend knows some level of fic I've written.

💖 What made you start writing? I think it's just kind of what everyone I knew was doing. I started in Alias fandom because two of my good friends were, and I wanted to write non-canon ship fic for it.

💥 How do you feel about criticism? I have/had a betas and I wanted criticism from them because I trusted them to give me actual feedback on how to fix shit. If it's a random hateful comment, I literally couldn't rustle up a shit with time nor money for it. It just doesn't bother me. It's weird that they took the time to read and then comment on a fic they hate, when I read fic I dislike all the time and just bitch to my friends like a normal human would.

💔 Is there a fic of yours that broke your heart? I am very into happy endings, so not really? I'm usually writing to repair a broken heart, not to break one that's already whole. There have been scenes that got to me, but I fix it because I just don't like things to hurt in fic. I have canon for that.

[queen-haq]

hi i was the recent AWS anon. AWSu didn't frustrate me at all! haha i love every single aspect of it FOR REAL, tho i do see where the other asks are coming from. idk, imo i usually just enjoy the ride of an entire story/fic since it's not my writing and it's like viewing an other piece of media. yes although i can't dictate anything, i love seeing how it pans out and inserting myself into these situations is also just super fun and interesting to think about "an alternate reality of me" lmao. the ranting to my friends were all good rants about loving our toxic fictional (semi-canon) men (who are psycho just for us) 😂😂😂 (pssst: i literally can't get over when billy broke that guy's hand for touching us and his jaw for talking bad about us). regarding the ending, i loveee that reader insisted on taking time for herself and she got it!! I ALSO LOVE THAT WE CAN KEEP THE DOG<3333 AND OFC I LOVE HAPPY ENDINGS!!! in general, i also really like how even though the love interest is toxic, we have a spine and talk back/speak the truths. tbh i literally feel helpless and heartbroken irl whenever y/n in fics just takes so much shit LOL. i don't even often like reading fics with toxic + psycho love interests bc #espacism, BUT the toxicity and spiciness are warmly welcomed every now and then if i like the premise. and at the root of it all, they are driven by love (so if i see how desperate they are, with a side of groveling, then i am HERE). and ofc i loveeeeed the entire story of AWSu, the character arcs, and all the little moments. i felt really immersed throughout and i was actually heartbroken during the whole memory-loss-divorce-meanie-dumont-fiasco. idk what else to type bc no words/ask can contain my enjoyment of your writing haha. AWSu really resonates with me, it was a blast reading it all! literally can't wait for grudgingly yours to pan out. already know i'm gonna love it so much hehe. hope you have as much fun writing as we are reading ;)<3

Aw, I'm happy my fics captured your interest and that you appreciated AWSu. I had such a blast writing it, and I'm still surprised by how much it resonated with readers.

I hope you enjoy GY that much as well. I'm still at the beginning stages of the fic so I don't have all the details worked out yet - but I'm excited for the fic NGL

Thank you for the lovely feedback :)

Oh, and yes, I love it when female protagonists don't take shit. I just really, really love headstrong female characters paired with toxic men haha