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unfinishedslurs · 2 months ago

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de-aged bruce wayne and the worlds most thrilling game of clue

Mini-Bruce stares at Tim, and hands him a doll.

“We are playing Detective Barbie,” he announces. “You can be Ken.”

Affection rises in his chest. He’s just so tiny. Some of the panic eases too. Barbies. He can play Barbies. “Is Ken the Watson to your Sherlock?”

“Ken is dead.”

Never mind. He barely resists the urge to groan. What is he supposed to do if he’s dead? He’s so bored. He can’t leave the room, he’s supposed to watch Bruce. And if he tries to take Bruce with him to a different room, he has no doubt the kid will slip him somehow.

He knows exactly what he’s doing, too. Trying to make it clear that Tim isn’t welcome. Welp, sorry, Mini-Bruce, but if your adult self couldn’t get rid of me, this eight year old version of you has absolutely zero chance.

Tim’s like a termite. He has gotten in the foundations of the house, and there is no getting him out. Still, he doesn’t want to just be playing Dead Ken.

“Counter offer,” he suggests, and Bruce stares at him flatly. God, it’s weird how much like Damian he looks. Not that adult Bruce doesn’t share a resemblance, but it’s even more obvious when the baby fat hasn’t faded to a sharp, square jawline and five o’clock shadow. They’re not identical, different shapes to the nose, different eyes, but the scowl he’s leveling at Tim sends him right back to when Damian first moved in. “I play the murderer.”

Ha! It was barely there, but he caught it. A small flicker of interest in Bruce’s eyes.

“That sounds dumb,” he scoffs, but it’s too late. Tim has smelled blood in the water, and he’ll press his advantage until Bruce has no other choice but to let him win. He’s not too good to use the same tactics he uses for Ra’s and the board of Wayne Enterprises on an eight year old. “How would that even work?”

“I’m so glad you asked.”

He has Bruce blindfolded with a pair of bat-grade noise canceling headphones on in the center of the room, and goes to work picking out props and setting clues around the dollhouse.

He lays Ken in the middle of the mock police tape (the decorative stuff that seemed to spawn in every artsy girl’s pencil pouch in school but never actually stuck to anything) and spends a few minutes contemplating which Barbie he wants to use as the murderer.

No offense to Ken, but there was only one in the bucket. Plus Tim really wanted to be Barbie.

“Are you done yet?” Bruce complains loudly. Tim flicks him in the back of the head, since he wouldn’t be able to hear his response anyways. “Hey!”

Tim pulls one of the headphones off his ear. “Patience, padawan. I’m wrapping it up.”

Bruce huffs, but settles again.

It’s all worth it when Tim has him finally take the stuff off, and Bruce’s eyes widen with excitement as soon as the blindfold falls away.

It’s almost like a Cluedo setup in the dream house, with several possible murder weapons strewn about, different suspects in different rooms, and Ken laying face down the middle of the kitchen.

“There’s been a murder,” Tim announces gravely as Bruce whips his head around to him. “Your goal is to figure out which Barbie is responsible for the death of Kensworth Footsworth, a wealthy heir of a washing machine company. There are seven possible suspects, each with their own motives-“ he pulls out the informational cards he made with a grin “-and alibis. One of these cards also has a description of the victims injuries. Your goal is to figure out the perpetrator, the murder weapon, and the motive. You get three hints. I will be acting as the different suspects, trying to throw you off the scent.”

Could they have just played Clue? Probably, but the 3D aspect of things is kind of exciting. Tim is actually really looking forward to this.

Bruce just stares at him. “Kensworth Footsworth is a stupid name.”

“Maybe that’s why the perp killed him.” Tim’s smile slowly fades as Bruce just keeps staring at him, expressionless. “We don’t, uh, have to play if you don’t want to. Obviously. I just thought it might be fun like this…”

Bruce finally looks away, something flickering over his face. “It’s fine. We can play. But you’d better not go easy on me!”

Tim smiles again, a little more strained. “Great!”

An hour later, Tim thinks this may be the most fun he’s ever had. Bruce is actually smiling. A real, bonafide, ear-to-ear grin that hasn’t shown up the whole time he’s been de-aged. It’s somehow the same and completely different from older Bruce’s smile, the one Tim always feels so proud of whenever he’s the one to make it appear. It still invokes the same feeling from an eight year old, apparently.

Bruce slams a character card down, beaming. “I’ve got it! It was Balloon Beauty Barbie, in the kitchen, with the stiletto!”

“And why did she do it?”

“Because Kensworth Footsworth stole her rightful place as heir, and she’s still next in line for the fortune when he dies!”

“Yes!” He jumps to his feet, raising his hand for a high-five. “Dude, you got it! That’s awesome!”

Bruce bounces on the balls of his feet, eyes lit up with a child-like eagerness that is still so weird to see on his dad. Tim would do pretty much anything to keep it there, probably.

“We’ve gotta celebrate,” he decides. “Do you like ice cream? I think we have ice cream in the freezer.” They always have ice cream in the freezer.

He’s being dragged out of the room before he even finishes his sentence.

“Alfie!” Bruce shouts as soon as they enter the kitchen. “I won detectives!”

The butler turns around, and his eyes widen slightly at Bruce’s beaming face before the boy collides with his leg. They both stumble from the force of it. Bruce seems caught off guard by this, but Alfred steadies them quickly enough that Tim doesn’t have to keep them from falling over.

“Is that so?” He asks, hand coming down to brush his fingers through Bruce’s hair. The questioning glance he sends Tim is full of affection and something he doesn’t know how to name. Gratitude, maybe, but he doesn’t know why.

“Tim showed me this game you can play with the Barbies, where you start out blindfolded and the other person makes cards and there’s a dead body and a bunch of weapons—“

“Oh?” The next look he shoots Tim is a little less fond. He smiles sheepishly.

“I basically made Clue into a 3D Barbie game,” he explains.

“It was Ballon Beauty Barbie, in the kitchen, with a stiletto,” Bruce recites dutifully. “Alfie, we need to play! It’s kind of like your spy games!”

“Spy games?”

“Master Bruce has always enjoyed mysteries, as I’m sure you’ve figured out by now.”

“I hadn't seen young Master Bruce smile like that since…” Alfred trails off, then shakes himself briskly and turns a fond smile onto Tim. “You boys have always been very good at showing him the light in the darkness.”

“You know me, Alfred,” Tim says. “It’s what I’m here for.”

#batfam fanfic #tim drake #bruce wayne #alfred pennyworth #for context bruce has been de-aged to eight years old only a few months out from when his parents died #which is part of why he's so standoffish at first #honestly the idea of this tiny eight year old not smiling like he did before his parents deaths until dick came into his life #like 14 years later makes me want to cry #he's so tiny. itty bitty. no wonder alfred tears up

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uluvjay · 1 year ago

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Drunken confessions- J. Marino

John Marino x Hughes! Sister

In which you drunkenly admit your feelings for your brother’s teammate

Warnings?; fluff, talks of embarrassment, crying, drunkenness, cursing, throwing up and mentions of it, kissing, slight age gap(5 years), I apologize for any errors.

The sound of the front door bursting open along with stumbling feet and mixed curses caused John to jump up from his spot on the couch.

Making his was to the entryway of the house he found both of your brothers holding you upright as they did their best to get you into the house.

“What the hell happened?” He questioned the younger men as he moved forward to give them a hand.

“Someone was upset about failing her test so let’s just say the vodka shots were never ending tonight.” Luke grumbled as they finally made way into the living room and laid you onto the couch where John had just been sitting.

John laughed lightly at the sight of your snoring form, your hair was messy and makeup smudged, yet to him you still looked just as beautiful as earlier in the evening when you first emerged from your room for a night out with your brothers.

“Um My girls here, I’m gonna head out.” Luke coughed before he quickly rushed out of the house.

“Okay?” John laughed as he looked at Jack who looked just as guilty.

“I-would you be okay watching over her till morning? She usually doesn’t puke or anything and Vodka tends to knock her out so she shouldn’t be an issue.” Jack rushed, rocking back onto his heels while he awaited his teammates answer.

“Where are you going?” John questioned confused.

“There’s a girl in my car….waiting to go back to her place…” Jack breathed.

“Oh, uh yeah I can look over her. Go enjoy yourself man.” John shrugged, you were snoring pretty loud and it looked like you wouldn’t be waking up anytime soon.

“Thank you! I swear the next time we go to dinner I got you covered. You’re the best man!” Jack beamed.

John watched as your brother placed a kiss to the top of your head before rushing out the door and making sure to shut it quietly behind him.

John grabbed the remote off the coffee table before he sat on the opposite side of the gray sectional, he unpaused his show and picked up from where he had left off.

However he had trouble keeping his eyes on the tv for long, they seemed to continuously drift over to your sleeping form. He didn’t understand how someone could be as beautiful as you, he still remembers when Jack introduced you a few months back.

You’d alway been around and he knew he had met you before but there was something different this time. You were in college, had just transferred over from the university of Michigan so you could attend a better program.

He knew he shouldn’t have looked at you the way he did, you had barely just turned twenty-one but there was something in those blue eyes and dark hair that captivated him.

Especially once his apartment building had to be shut down due to an outbreak of termites and your brothers offered their last spare room to him three months ago.

He thought he’d be fine living under the same roof as you, you’d always be at school, him at practice or a game, however he was very wrong. He couldn’t help the way his eyes followed you throughout the house, how his heart warmed at the sound of your laugh, or how he blushed like a teenager anytime you came within a foot of him.

The sound of you coughing pulled him from his thoughts and before he knew it you were jumping up and sprinting down the hallway towards the bathroom.

Hearing your gags echo throughout the hall he quickly followed behind you and grabbed your hair just in time for you to empty the contents of your stomach into the toilet.

You don’t register who it was behind you even as there was a cold rag placed onto the back of your neck;something your brothers never did, however that didn’t stop you from thinking it was one of them.

“Thanks Jacky.” You mumbled as your head rested on the back of your hand.

“Uh, I’m not Jack but you’re welcome.” John spoke softly.

Your body went stiff at the sound of his soft voice, there was no way you just puked in front of him, dread filled your stomach and before you knew it tears of embarrassment were streaming down your cheeks.

“Hey, hey, what’s wrong? Why are you crying?” The older man quickly kneeled beside you on the cold tile of the bathroom floor.

“S’ nothing” you grumbled slightly pushing him away.

John pushed away the flash of hurt in his chest and grabbed your chin to lift your head, his free hand pushing the hair that had fallen in your face back.

“Don’t say it’s nothing, what’s wrong Y/n?” He asked gently.

“That was embarrassing” you mumbled, eyes looking everywhere besides his.

“Throwing up? There’s nothing embarrassing about that sweetheart, trust me I’ve cleaned up Jack’s vomit more times than I can count.” He laughed.

You tried not to swoon at the nickname he let slip, but the alcohol in your system wouldn’t let it go as your cheeks flamed bright red.

“I didn’t just throw up John, I threw up in front of you!, my crush, the hot guy that’s older and can have any girl he wants, the guy that doesn’t want some sloppy college girl.” You cried.

John swore his heart skipped a beat at your admission, but he couldn’t lie that his brain made him think it was just your drunken words.

“See you don’t feel the same and it’s all because I threw up in front of you.” The alcohol spoke for you and John couldn’t help but giggle lightly.

“How about we talk about this tomorrow? When you’re sober.” He asked softly.

“Okay.” You agreed.

John smiled and helped you off the floor, his hands gripped your waist and walked you towards your bedroom a few doors down. He sat you on the bed and turned to your large vanity looking for makeup remover, finding what he needed he made his way back towards you and began to wipe your face.

“Are you taking my makeup off?” You whispered.

“Mhm” he nodded.

You smiled as he ran the wipe along your forehead before coming down and running it over your cheeks and eyes, doing his best to get everything off.

“Do you want some pajamas?” He asked.

“Yes please, they’re in the drawers on the right.” You smiled softly.

He nodded and made his way over to your dresser grabbing you an old T-shirt and a pair of shorts he sat them next to you.

“I’ll be right back.” He spoke as he left you to get dressed and to collect a bottle of water and Tylenol for you.

He came back to find your bedroom door open once again and your body tucked comfortably under your large comforter.

He sat everything on your bedside table and wished you a goodnight but before he could exit your room he heard your voice speak up.

“John?”

“Yeah?” He replied as he turned back to face you despite the now pitch black room.

“You promise we can talk tomorrow?” He heard you ask quietly.

“Promise.”

“Goodnight John.”

“Night Y/n, sleep tight.” He smiled and made his way to his own bedroom for a long sleepless night.

The following morning you woke up to the smell of bacon flowing into your room making your severely dry mouth water.

Sitting up you looked down at the shirt you wore and the shorts on your legs, confusion wracked through your body for a moments until the memories of puking in the toilet and John taking care of you came floating back.

Butterflies filled your stomach as you remembered how well he took care of you and made sure you got into bed safely. However your smile quickly faded as you remembered that you drunkenly admitted your feelings to the older man last night.

“Fuck!” You groaned as you slumped back into the comfort of your bed.

It took you a few minutes to get the guts to go out to the kitchen where you knew John was no doubt cooking breakfast.

Shuffling into the large kitchen of the house you found him standing him at the stove, shirtless with sweatpants low on his waist, his rib cage tattoo on full display.

“Morning sleepyhead” he smiled as he heard you take a seat at the island.

“Morning.” You greeted with an awkward smile.

You watched as he turned the the fire off and turned to place the last few pieces of bacon onto a plate, looking around you noticed pancakes and a bowl of fresh fruit.

“Eat up, you definitely need it.” He spoke up nudging a plate in your direction.

You wanted to but you couldn’t take the feeling that weighed down on your chest, the anxiety of what you admitted last night lingering over you.

“John, I’m sorry.” You mumbled quickly.

“For what?”

“For what I said and did last night. I shouldn’t have drank as much as I did and you shouldn’t have had to take care of me while I was a mess, I was probably a handful and I’m real-” You began but the feeling of soft lips touching yours cut you off.

It took you a moment to respond due to shock but once you shook it off you were tangling a hand into his curls and pushing your lips harder against his.

He placed a large hand on your jaw, tipping your head back as his tongue slid into your mouth and ran against yours.

You whined when he pulled his lips away from yours, embarrassingly following his mouth as he pulled back.

“Don’t apologize.” He whispered, hand still holding your jaw.

“Did you really mean what you said last night? About me being the guy you like?”

You nodded softly, “I’m sorry if it’s weird.”

“It’s not weird, especially since I feel the same way.” He smiled.

“You do?”

John laughed lightly, “Thought me kissing you was enough of a give away.”

“Hmm, I’m not sure I’m convinced. Maybe you should give me another one.” You smirked.

“Is that so?” He asked, spreading your thighs a bit more as he slipped between them.

“Mhm” you nodded, teeth sinking into your bottom lip as you looked up at him.

He smirked before dipping down and kissing you breathless this time, it was different from the first kiss. This one was full of passion, his hands tangled into your hair as kissed you deeply.

Once he pulled away he rested his forehead against yours.

“Are you sure you’re okay with me only being twenty-one?” You questioned softly.

“As long as you’re okay with dating an old man.” He laughed.

“You are not old!” You giggled.

He gave you one more kiss before backing up and beginning to make himself a plate and you followed behind him to make one of your own. And after a delicious breakfast you two cleaned up and made your way to the living room to relax on the couch, this time cuddled up next to each other instead of on opposite ends.

“How should we tell my brothers?” You questioned.

“Tell us what?” You heard from the entryway.

#nhl #john marino #john marino x reader #john marino imagine #john marino x you #john marino x y/n #hockey imagine #nhl fanfiction #nhl imagine #nhl blurb #nhl fluff #nhl fic

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h-doodles · 1 year ago

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@greencurlyhair i cant tag you for some reason but n e way. YOUR TAGS:

so true and so real. to me 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰

also neo, your miranda slander amuses me. OFC there are geniune miranda stans. toxic yuri needs love too fr and i'm happy to carry that love and burden for everyone <3

ive made this pole before already but i wanna see if its still the same

#that being said MAXI OMG SO REAL i'll be next to you with termites <3 #/j #resident lover #mother miranda #polls

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anonymous-dentist · 18 days ago

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Ok but considering that actual pangolins eat termites that’s not SUPER strange /j

He’s more of a pangolin than you’d think (even though he’s genuinely superpowerless lol)

#asks!#anon!#coffee shop superhero au

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sapphire-heart-tippy · 10 months ago

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Sugar Crash Void Bash: The Fanfic!

chapter 1 chapter 2 chapter 3

CWs: Anxiety, snake mention

Chapter Four: Strawberry Shortquake

chapter 5 chapter 6 chapter 7 chapter 8

“Hngh!” Tippy hoists a large, sparkly blue suitcase onto the bed, “Alright, that’s the last of it.”

“Sweetie, you’ve said that three times now.” Vanilla rubs his husband’s royal blue hair.

“I know, Vans, but this time I mean it.” Ze chuckles. Ice looks around, then puts his hands on his hips,

“Did you pack any shoes, Termite?”

Tippy’s eyes widen and ze quickly unzips the suitcase. Ice lightly covers his mouth with a small chuckle as he watches his husband. Ramón walks into the bedroom’s open door, looking a little nervous. Ice turns to his son, while his husband picks out some shoes to bring,

“Hey, Foofs. Are you all packed up?”

“Oh, uh, yeah, papa.” The teen nods then clasps his hands together, “So. We’re going on some kind of vacation or business trip or…?”

Ice frowns his brows, looking a little nervous. He gives a polite smile to his son, while his husband tries in vain to press zeir suitcase closed,

“Oh, we’re simply visiting my home country to…” Vanilla looks to his upper right, “expose you to a part of my culture which– that y-you have never seen before. You- this is for your enrichment and education.” Ramón nods slowly then looks away nonchalantly. What is the point in lying to me about what’s really going on? I’m not stupid, papa…

After the plane trip

Ramón and his fathers leave the plane. The teenager looks outside the airport’s window with confusion, something he has also been feeling as he looked out of the plane’s window.

“Is something the matter, child?” Ice asks his son.

“Yeah uh… I always thought Egypt was just, like, nothing but sand. There's also... grass?” Ramón asks. Tippy immediately starts laughing. Vanilla sighs with an exhausted look, not only from the fact that his son has obviously not been paying attention in class, but because he knows a barrage of puns or plays on words are coming from his husband.

“Well, I guess you better get your grass to the table tonight, because we're gonna have sandwiches for dinner!” Tippy snickers.

“Oh boy...” Ice speaks with an exasperated expression. Tippy giggles and looks up at Vanilla. Ice gives his husband a scolding look. Tippy cackles loudly, making some people turn to look at what’s happening.

“J-just-” Tippy holds onto Vanilla’s arm while Ramón cracks a smile, biting his lip trying not to laugh. The blue haired man continues, “J-just make sure you don’t wake up Vanilla’s mummy!”

“I don’t have a– ugh. Be quiet, Termite. Not another word from you until we get to the manor.” Ice shakes his head, a little annoyed, but also curious about what other puns his husband has to offer.

“What? Oh that’s not… Fair-oh.” Tippy’s hyena laughs are contagious, causing Ramón to giggle along with him, “G-get it? Pharaoh? Because–” He keeps laughing, “No? Well, I have more puns to keep you sarcopha-guessing!”

“Tippy.” Vanilla turns sharply to his husband, stifling a chuckle and cracking a smile against his will, “Enough. *chuckle* That is inappropriate.”

“Sorry, sorry. You know how I get when I’m nervous, baby.” Tippy pats Vanilla on the back. He mumbles, “N’Doul would make even worse puns.”

Ramón chuckles and looks around at the airport. It has been years since the teen had been out of the country.

“Ice?” A familiar voice speaks, making Vanilla’s head turn in an instant.

“Oh, Terence.” Vanilla replies, “It’s been years.” He touches the small of his partner’s back, “Tippy, you remember Terence, hm? Oh, and this is my son. Ramón.”

Ramón shyly but coolly waves to Terence.

“It’s nice to meet you, Ramón. Wow… You look just like your papa. The resemblance is almost uncanny.” Terence nods at Ramón and glances over at Ice. Ramón smiles then looks away, very perplexed as to why he said that… Terence then turns his attention back to Ice, “Lord Dio has given me specific orders to bring you three back to the mansion. So follow me, you all.”

In the car

Ramón looks out the window of the car. He hears his fathers speak to Terence but doesn’t pay attention to what words they are saying exactly. Instead, he is more focused on the new country he is in. Soon enough, they arrive at the mansion. Terence parks the car and steps out. Vanilla opens the door for his son and smiles at him,

“Well, Foofy, we’re here. What do you think?”

“Whoa!” Ramón looks at the outside of the mansion. Tippy skips around in the little yard and up to the front door. Ice gently pushes Ramón’s back up to the stairs leading up to the door of the mansion. The family and Terence enter the mansion. It’s bitter cold and dark inside, save for a few electric lamps and candles scattered around. Tippy scoffs and leans toward Ramón,

“Tch, wow, and it looks like your ‘tío Dio’ still doesn’t believe in dusting.”

Terence glances over to him,

“Yeah, well– yeah.” He brings the family up to Dio’s boudoir. Ramón can’t help but feel a bit uneasy when they reach their destination.

“Ah… there you are.” The golden locked, ivory fleshed man speaks as the door opens. A toothy, fang filled grin spreads across his ancient yet youthful face. He trots over to Ice, planting gentle kisses on either of his cheeks. He leans down and kisses the back of Tippy’s hand, with a grin. Suddenly, his amber eyes land on the bubblegum haired adolescent before him,

“And this… this is the fabled Ramón.” The pasty white man stretches out his hand, tipped with inky black claws, to the young boy. Ramón looks to his papa for reassurance. Ice nods at his son. Ramón hesitantly shakes Dio’s hand, feeling the cold, clammy, corpse-like flesh on his own.

“Well, well, well…” Dio speaks, his voice low and sultry, soothing to the ears yet something is eerily off about it… very inhuman, quite divine yet unholy. Everything about this man is a walking contradiction it seems, “How are you enjoying your vacation thus far? Hm?”

“O-oh, uh…” Ramón looks to his parents then back at Dio. He gulps then sheepishly replies, “It’s pretty cool, heh!” Dio nods his head, turning to Ice and Tippy,

“It’s uncanny how much he is like the two of you… both in appearance and demeanor. Even as an infant, it was just mystifying, the resemblance.” This makes Ramón confused yet again. This is the second time he has been physically compared to his adopted fathers. E-even as an infant?! What?! Ramón’s heart rate skyrockets.

Dio inhales and speaks again, “At any rate, I suppose it’s time I introduce you to your rooms, hm?”

That’s when an equally as large and buff older man, albeit just a bit chubbier, with blue hair and beard stubble, walks by the room, reading a book.

“Or better yet,” Dio snaps his fingers, “Jojo.”

“What is it–? Oh! Guests!” He closes the book shut, “How quaint, I–” He pauses, “Oh my stars… it can’t be! Mr Ice? Gratuity?”

“Jonny!” Tippy runs over to him and gives him a hug. Jonathan wraps his arms around the petite man, giving a hearty chuckle, “Man, I am never gonna get used to you being so tall… or having arms! And legs! And… everything below the neck! Haha, and you have a beard now!” Ze takes Jonathan’s arm and pulls him to zeir family, “Look, look. Vans and I got married and had an itty bitty!” Ze points to Ice and Ramón. Jonathan clasps his hands together,

“Oh, how precious! What a darling little family you have here, dear friend.” Jonathan shakes Ramón’s hand with a polite smile, “What an honor to meet the child of Mr Ice and Gratuity.”

“Jojo, show them to their rooms. The happy couple will stay in Ice’s old room, Ramón will stay in Gratuity’s old room.” Dio dismisses the four.

On the way to the rooms

“Wait, wait, hold on a second,” Ramón speaks, “So let me get this straight; you were a severed head in a jar. My papa and daddo used to take care of you, and Mr Dio is a vampire?!”

“That is correct, dear boy.” Jonathan confirms.

“...What is going on here exactly?!” Ramón shakes his head in confusion. The three adult men all exchange looks with each other, turn to Ramón and speak in unison,

“We don’t know.”

“H-huh–?!” Ramón gives them all an incredulous look. Jonathan raises his hands up and speaks cheerfully,

“Oh, it certainly is spectacular to have you two in the manor once again!” He shows them around, “It has been a while, yes indeed. As you may notice, we have made some adjustments to our living quarters.”

“Yeah, I’ve noticed there’s different people working here too,” Tippy begins, “Terence and N’Doul are still here though.” Jonathan nods and points to some new decorations,

“Of course. Oh, look at these, so delightful. Mr Ice?”

“Yes, Mr Jojo?” Vanilla responds.

“I hope you don’t mind, but we spruced up your old room a bit.” Jonathan opens the door to Vanilla’s old room. It’s clean and pretty fancy as opposed to how dark and gloomy it used to look, “Dear brother didn’t tell me that you all were arriving, so pardon the dust.”

“No, no, it’s alright, Jonathan.” Ice looks around, memories of his time in the mansion flooding back to him. Nostalgia and dismay of the recollections fill his heart. Tippy immediately jumps face first on the bed while Ice looks around and touches his old sliding closet doors. Ramón points to the right side of the room,

“What’s in there?”

“Oh, that’s the bathroom, Foofy. Your papa had his own bathroom too.” Ice turns to look at the bathroom door across the room, remembering the first time he and Tippy had showered together. A small smile creeps upon his lips as he looks back on that memory fondly.

“So… you were basically Mr Dio’s…?” Ramón asks slowly, his voice trails off at the end of his sentence.

“Servant.” Ice glances back at his son, “Yes, I… I was Lord D– ahem, Mr Dio’s servant for a time.”

“Lord Dio?” Ramón tilts his head, much like Tippy does when he’s confused. Ice feels his cheeks grow hot and he nibbles the inside of his cheek,

“Yes, because he is the ‘lord’ of this mansion, my child. You know how there are lords and ladies? Well, he is a ‘lord’.”

Tippy pipes up,

“Oooh, I thought it was because you practically worshipped the guy–”

“Tippy.” Ice grits his teeth and scolds his husband softly. The blue haired gentleman looks back and forth between Ramón and Vanilla,

“I-I’m just kidding! I was just joking, Ramón!”

It’s a little bit of an awkward silence. Jonathan rubs his neck and turns away,

“It’s such a pleasure to have you back, old friend. Alright, dear boy,” He turns his attention to Ramón, “Come with me and I shall show you where you will be staying.”

The two of them leave the room.

Ice sighs and sits on the bed, hanging his head and looking ashamed. Tippy gently touches zeir husband’s shoulder. The brunette looks over at zem with a dejected expression,

“Please don’t tell him…” he looks down at his hands, “about who I used to be. I don’t– *sigh* I don’t want him to think of me in such a bad light.”

“I’m sorry, Vans. I wasn’t thinking.” Tippy rubs Ice’s shoulder.

“It’s alright.” He touches zeir hand, “I was at my lowest point. I did things I’m not proud of. I let L– Dio, goddamn it, humiliate me… sometimes in front of guests. I-I was so blinded by what I thought was love to even think for myself.”

Vanilla looks up at the top of the door frame for a while, then back down at his hands,

“I worshipped him like a god because he saved my life… you know what I did. He treated me so kindly, with a tenderness I have never felt in my life…” he turns to his husband with a warm smile, “That is… until I fell in love with you.”

“Awww, Vanilla. You soft serve.” Tippy gives Vanilla a little peck on the lips. The brunette holds both of Tippy’s hands gently,

“Then you showed me what real love is like. What it actually feels like to have somebody care about me…” He delicately caresses the cheek of his lover, “I couldn’t ask for a happier ending to this fairytale.”

Tippy chuckles and happily hums against the touch of Vanilla’s knuckles. Ze lightly touches Ice’s left bang, admiring the grey and white streaks mixed with the original brown hair,

“I’ll love you forever and ever… you’ve become such a handsome older man, you know? I’m looking forward to spending the rest of my life with you.”

Ice chuckles, a pleased smile plastered across his face. Those beautiful smile lines on his face, indicating how many years he has spent smiling and laughing rather than frowning and sulking, crease on the corners of his mouth. The delicate little crow's feet on the corners of his honey sunset brown eyes scrunch up with joy. He presses his lips, lightly glossed with his favorite vanilla scented lip oil, right in the middle of his husband’s forehead.

Meanwhile

“Alright, lad.” Jonathan opens the door to a bedroom, “This one used to be your father’s room! Er, your other father’s room. The one with the blue hair that is.” Ramón enters the guest room and looks around. It’s a little smaller than his papa’s old room. The bed is up against the wall, as opposed to being in the center like in the other bedroom. Ramón sets his luggage down and turns to Jonathan,

“Thank you, Mr Jonathan.”

“Oh, it’s never a problem, dear boy!” Jonathan gives him a warm smile, about to close the door, but he remembers something, “Ah, and feel free to raid the fridge. Just don’t disturb my wife!”

“W-what?!” Ramón recoils in shock.

“Ahahahohoho! I jest, my boy, I jest!” Jonathan chuckles, “Have a pleasant stay, and a good night.” He closes the door gently. Ramón sits on his bed, relaxing a bit. He touches the blanket a little…

“Something tells me he wasn’t joking.”

It’s a restless night, filled with tossing and turning. Chills crawl down Ramón’s back, yet beads of sweat pool across his face. The teen trembles with fear of an unknown threat, clutching his chest with shaking breath as he stares up at the ceiling. Behind his eyes, a cryptic dream of snakes coiling around his limbs plays, all with eyes of crystal, until they make their way to his throat, strangling the life out of him until his eyes go grey. The young boy lays on his side, clinging to his pillow for any semblance of comfort.

After what seems like an eternity,

Tuk tuk tuk

Ramón jolts up and gasps sharply.

Tuk tuk tuk

“Foofy?” his papa’s voice speaks through the door. Ramón hesitantly climbs out of bed. His hand trembles as he reaches for the doorknob.

Krrrrrrrr

The door opens with a creak. Ice looks down at his son with a sweet, adoring smile. Ramón internally breathes a sigh of relief,

“G-good morning, papa. What’s up?”

“Hmhm, we need you to go ahead and get dressed for the day.” Ice softly rubs his son’s curly pink hair, “Mr Dio wants us all to meet in the dining hall for breakfast. He has some important news to tell us.”

“Oh, y-yeah! Sure. I’ll be right there.” Ramón rubs his neck. Vanilla leans down, about to plant a kiss on his son’s forehead, but he catches himself. Instead, he gives Ramón a polite smile and nods,

“Of course, dear. I love you.”

Ramón gives a nod and a smile right back before closing the door and getting ready.

In the dining hall

Dio is sitting down at the end of the table, daintily sipping on a mimosa. Vanilla and Tippy are sitting next to each other, touching hands and chuckling between themselves. Jonathan is finishing up setting the table with many different breakfast food options.

Ramón shyly and hesitantly walks into the large room through the open archway. Dio chuckles,

“Ohohoho, there he is.”

Ramón makes an awkward smile and lazily waves at those at the table. Ice gestures for his son to sit nearby. The pink haired boy obeys and sits next to his fathers. Dio takes a sip of his mimosa and hums a bit,

“Mmm… try some of those pancakes, lad. Add a little bit of powdered sugar, berries, and maple syrup on top,” he does a chef’s kiss, “divine.”

Ramón nods and helps himself to some breakfast along with his fathers. Everyone begins to feast for a while. Dio clears his throat and turns to Vanilla,

“Ice.”

“Yes, sire?” Ice instinctively asks. Ramón tilts his head,

“Sire?”

Dio chuckles and takes another sip of his drink as Vanilla’s cheeks heat up. Dio speaks before Ice can say anything,

“Something important I have been meaning to tell you,” He stands up and approaches the brunette. He drags his hand along Ice’s shoulders, stopping at his right shoulder. The blonde leans down and speaks into his ear softly,

“There is… somebody I’d like you to meet…” the vampire pats his shoulder and walks away. As he’s halfway to the archway, he glances behind him at the others,

“I’d like the rest of you to meet him as well. I’m certain he will make an important ally.”

When Dio says that, Vanilla gets tense. He was under the impression that this all was supposed to be a secret from Ramón. It looks like all of that just went out the window now.

Important ally? Okay, this just got weirder. What is going on?! Ramón thinks to himself.

To be continued…

#sugar crash void bash fanfic #sugar crash void bash #ramón ice jjba oc #tipvans #sapphire heartverse #jjba au #jjba au fanfic #selfship fanfic #selfship au fanfic #safeship #safe ship #fankid #fanchild #ask to cw if i missed something!#dio the vampire dude #jonathan the joestar #snake mention

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fallingstarsandthemoon · 1 year ago

Note

it’s me, I’m the parasite. :}

hi, I’m Star, and I’ve had an autistic ass perfectly normal interest in the funny blue goggled Brit since I was 7

anyways your shady oaks art is fine Michelin Star cuisine so

*poke poke nudge nudge like a damn parasite*

Shady oaks SMP is back :}

W H AT

#Is it normal to ring up your favorite artist in a fandom or not idk tumblr norms that well #fr said “wake tf up soilder it’s time to carry the fandom again” /j #shady oaks smp #also yes that animatic the last morsels of this fandom will eat that shit up like a termite colony in US walls #ive also been making shady oaks but GemCYT as a side story if you wanna check that out

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galacticnova3 · 2 months ago

Note

that was a little bit much for a joke. is there something you would like to tell the class

Actually, there IS something I would like to tell the class!

The order Embioptera, commonly known as webspinners or footspinners,[2] are a small group of mostly tropical and subtropical insects, classified under the subclass Pterygota. The order has also been called Embiodea or Embiidina.[3] More than 400 species in 11 families have been described, the oldest known fossils of the group being from the mid-Jurassic. Species are very similar in appearance, having long, flexible bodies, short legs, and only males having wings.

Webspinners are gregarious, living subsocially in galleries of fine silk which they spin from glands on their forelegs. Members of these colonies are often related females and their offspring; adult males do not feed and die soon after mating. Males of some species have wings and are able to disperse, whereas the females remain near where they were hatched. Newly mated females may vacate the colony and find a new one nearby. Others may emerge to search for a new food source to which the galleries can be extended, but in general, the insects rarely venture from their galleries.

The name Embioptera ("lively wings") comes from Greek εμβιος (embios), meaning "lively", and πτερον (pteron), meaning "wing", a name that has not been considered to be particularly descriptive for this group of fliers,[4] perhaps instead referring to their remarkable speed of movement both forward and backward.[5] The common name webspinner comes from the insects' unique tarsi on their front legs, which produce multiple strands of silk. They use the silk to make web-like galleries in which they live.[6]

Early entomologists considered the webspinners to be a group within the termites or the neuropterans and a variety of group names have been suggested including Adenopoda, Embidaria, Embiaria, and Aetioptera. In 1909 Günther Enderlein used the name Embiidina which was used widely for a while. Edward S. Ross suggested a new name, Embiomorpha in 2007. The currently most-widely accepted ordinal name is Embioptera, suggested by Arthur Shipley in 1904.[7]

Fossils of webspinners are rare.[8] The group probably first appeared during the Jurassic; the oldest known, Sinembia rossi and Juraembia ningchengensis, both in a new family Sinembiidae created for them, are from the Middle Jurassic of Inner Mongolia, and were described in 2009. The female of J. ningchengensis had wings, supporting Ross's proposal that both sexes of ancestral Embioptera were winged.[9] Species such as Atmetoclothoda orthotenes, possibly the first fossil member of the Clothodidae to be discovered, sometimes thought to be a "primitive" family, have been found in mid-Cretaceous amber from northern Myanmar. Litoclostes delicatus (Oligotomidae) has been found in the same locality.[10] The largest number of fossils have been found in mid-Eocene Baltic amber and early-Miocene Dominican amber.[8] Flattened compression fossils that have been interpreted as being webspinners have been found from the Eocene/Oligocene shales of Florissant, Colorado.[8]

Over 400 embiopteran species in 11 families have been described worldwide, the largest proportion of which inhabit tropical regions.[1][4][6][11] It is estimated that there may be around 2000 species extant today.[12]

The external phylogeny of Embioptera has been debated, with the polyneopteran order controversially classed in 2007 as a sister group to both Zoraptera (angel insects)[4][13] and Phasmatodea (stick insects).[14][15] The position of the Embioptera within the Polyneoptera suggested by a phylogenetic analysis carried out in 2012 by Miller et al., combining morphological and molecular evidence, is shown in the cladogram.[1]

The internal phylogeny of the group is not yet fully resolved. Miller et al.'s phylogenetic analysis examined 96 morphological characters and 5 genes for 82 species across the order. Four families were found to be robustly monophyletic in whatever way the phylogeny was analysed (parsimony, maximum likelihood, or Bayesian): Clothodidae, Anisembiidae, Oligotomidae, and Teratembiidae. The Embiidae, Scelembiidae, and Australembiidae remain monophyletic in one or more of the three analyses, but are broken up in others, so their status remains uncertain. Either the Clothodidae (under parsimony analysis) or Australembiidae (under Bayesian analysis) is the sister taxon to the remaining Embioptera taxa, so no single phylogenetic tree can be taken as definitive from this work.[1]

All webspinners have a remarkably similar body form, although they do vary in coloration and size. The majority are brown or black, ranging to pink or reddish shades in some species, and range in length from 15 to 20 mm (0.6 to 0.8 in). The body form of these insects is completely specialised for the silk tunnels and chambers in which they reside, being cylindrical, long, narrow and highly flexible.[16] The head has projecting mouthparts with chewing mandibles. The compound eyes are kidney-shaped, there are no ocelli, and the thread-like antennae are long, with up to 32 segments.[17][18] The antennae are flexible, so they do not become entangled in the silk, and the wings have a crosswise crease, allowing them to fold forwards and enable the male to dart backwards without the wings snagging the fabric.[6]

The first segment of the thorax is small and narrow, while the second and third are larger and broader, especially in the males, where they include the flight muscles.[19] All the females and nymphs are wingless, whereas adult males can be either winged or wingless depending on species.[19] The wings, where present, occur as two pairs that are similar in size and shape: long and narrow, with relatively simple venation. These wings operate using basic hydraulics; pre-flight, chambers (sinus veins) within the wings inflate with hemolymph (blood), making them rigid enough for use. On landing, these chambers deflate and the wings become flexible, folding back against the body. Wings can also fold forwards over the body, and this, along with the flexibility allows easy movement through the narrow silk galleries, either forwards or backwards, without resulting in damage.[19]

In both males and females the legs are short and sturdy, with an enlarged basal tarsomere on the front pair, containing the silk-producing glands; the mid and hind legs also have three tarsal segments with the hind femur enlarged to house the strong tibial depressor muscles that enable rapid reverse movement.[20][21] It is these silk glands on the front tarsi that distinguish the embiopterans; other noteworthy characteristics of this group include three-jointed tarsi, simple wing venation with few cross veins, prognathous (head with forward-facing mouthparts), and absence of ocelli (simple eyes).[4][22]

The abdomen has ten segments, with a pair of cerci on the final segment. These cerci, made up of two segments and asymmetric in length especially in the males are highly sensitive to touch, and allow the animal to navigate while moving backwards through the gallery tunnels, which are too narrow to allow the insect to turn round.[17] Because morphology is so similar between taxa, species identification is extremely difficult. For this reason, the main form of taxonomic identification used in the past has been close observation of distinctive copulatory structures of males, (although this method is now thought by some entomologists and taxonomists as giving insufficient classification detail).[11] Although males never eat during their adult stage, they do have mouthparts similar to those of the females. These mouthparts are used to hold onto the female during copulation.[23]

The eggs hatch into nymphs that resemble small, wingless adults. After a short period of parental care, the nymphs undergo hemimetabolosis (incomplete metamorphosis), moulting a total of four times before reaching adult form. Adult males never eat, and leave the home colony almost immediately to find a female and mate. Those males that cannot fly often mate with females in nearby colonies, meaning their chosen mates are often siblings or close relatives. In some species, the female eats the male after mating, but in any event, the male does not survive for long. A few species are parthenogenetic, meaning they can produce viable offspring without fertilisation of the eggs. This phenomenon occurs when a female is, for whatever reason, unable to find a male to mate with, thus giving her and her species reproductive security at all times.[17] After moulting and mating, the female lays a single batch of eggs either within the existing gallery, or wanders away to start a new colony elsewhere. Because the females are flightless, their potential for dispersal is limited to the distance a female can walk.[8]

Most, if not all, embiopteran species are gregarious but subsocial.[4] Typically, adult females show maternal care of their eggs and young, and often live in large colonies with other adult females, creating and sharing the webbing cover that helps to protect them against predators. The advantages of living in these colonies outweigh the disadvantage that results from the increased parasite load that this lifestyle entails.[8] Although some species breed once a year, or even once in two years, others breed more frequently, with Aposthonia ceylonica producing four or five batches of eggs in a twelve-month period.[6]

Maternal care starts with the placement of the eggs. Some species attach batches of eggs to the web structure with silk; others form the eggs into rows in grooves excavated in the bark; others fix them in rows with a cement formed from saliva, while many species bury them in a mass of silk, even incorporating other materials into the covering.[8] The majority of embiopterans guard their eggs, some actually standing over them, the main exception being species such as Saussurembia calypso that scatter their eggs widely. The main threat to the eggs is from egg parasitoids, which can attack whole batches of undefended eggs.[8] At this time the adult females become very territorial and aggressive to other individuals with whom they previously lived in harmony; three different types of vibratory signals are used to deter other embiopterans that approach the eggs too closely, and the intruder usually retires.[8]

After the eggs have hatched, the mothers resume their gregarious behaviour. In some species, they continue caring for their young for several days after hatching, and in a few, this parental care even involves the female feeding the nymphs with portions of chewed-up leaf litter and other foods.[24] The parthenogenetic Rhagadochir virgo incorporates scraps of lichen into the silk wrapping the eggs, and this may be eaten by newly hatched nymphs. Perhaps because individuals of this species are so closely related, the adults spin silk together and move around in coordinated groups. Even in species that provide no further parental care, the nymphs in the colony benefit from the greater silk-producing power of the adults and the extra protection that the more copious silk covering brings.[8]

Subsociality is a trade-off for the female, as the energy and time that is exerted in caring for her young is rewarded by giving them a much greater chance of surviving and carrying on her genetic lineage. Some species do share galleries with more than one adult, however, most groups consist of one adult female and her offspring.[25]

When webspinners clean their antennae, they may differ in their behavior from other insects which typically make use of the forelegs to either clean or bring the antennae toward the mouthparts for manipulation. Webspinners (as observed in the genus Oligembia) instead fold the antennae under the body and clean the antennae as they are held between the mouthparts and the substrate.[26]

When constructing their silken galleries, webspinners use characteristic cyclic movements of their forelegs, alternating actions with the left and right legs while also moving. There are variations in the choreography of these movements across species.[27]

Embiopterans produce a silk thread similar to that produced by the silkworm, Bombyx mori. The silk is produced in spherical secretory glands in the swollen tarsi (lower leg segments) of the forelimbs, and can be produced by both adults and larvae. Unlike Bombyx mori and other silk-producing (and spinning) members of both Lepidoptera and Hymenoptera, which only have one pair of silk glands per individual, some species of embiid are estimated to have up to 300 silk glands: 150 in each forelimb.[4] These glands are linked to a bristle-like cuticular process known as a silk ejector,[28] and their exceedingly high numbers allow individuals to spin large amounts of silk very quickly, creating extensive galleries. The silk web is produced throughout all stages of the embiopteran lifespan,[21] and requires modest energy output.[29]

Webspinner silk is among the thinnest of all animal silks, being in most species about 90 to 100 nanometres in diameter.[30] The finest of any insect are those of the webspinner Aposthonia gurneyi, averaging about 65 nanometres in diameter.[31] Each thread consists of a protein core folded into pleated beta-sheets, with a water-repellent coating rich in waxy alkanes.[30]

The galleries produced by embiopterans are tunnels and chambers woven from the silk they produce. These woven constructions can be found on substrates such as rocks and the bark of trees, or in leaf litter.[29] Some species camouflage their galleries by decorating the outer layers with bits of leaf litter or other materials to match their surroundings. The galleries are essential to their life cycle, maintaining moisture in their environment, and also offering protection from predators and the elements while foraging, breeding and simply existing. Embiopterans only leave the gallery complex in search of a mate, or when females explore the immediate area in search of a new food source.[16]

Webspinners continually extend their galleries to reach new food sources, and expand their existing galleries as they grow in size. The insects spin silk by moving their forelegs back and forth over the substrate, and rotating their bodies to create a cylindrical, silk-lined tunnel. Older galleries have multiple laminate layers of silk. Each gallery complex contains several individuals, often descended from a single female, and forms a maze-like structure, extending from a secure retreat into whatever vegetable food matter is available nearby. The size and complexity of the colony vary between species, and they can be very extensive in those species that live in hot and humid climates.[17]

The embiopteran diet varies between species, with available food sources changing with varying habitat. The nymphs and adult females feed on plant litter, bark, moss, algae and lichen. They are generalist herbivores; during his research, Ross maintained a number of species in the laboratory on a diet of lettuce and dry oak leaves. Adult males do not eat at all, dying soon after mating.[6]

The Sclerogibbidae are a small family of aculeate wasps that are specialist parasites of embiopterans. The wasp lays an egg on the abdomen of a nymph. The wasp larva emerges and attaches itself to the host's body, consuming the host's tissues as it grows. It eventually forms a cocoon and drops off the carcass. A Neotropical tachinid fly, Perumyia embiaphaga,[32] and a braconid wasp species in the genus Sericobracon,[33] are known to be parasitoids of adult embioptera. A few scelionid wasps in the tribe Embidobiini are egg parasitoids of the Embioptera.[34] A protozoan parasite in Italy effectively sterilises males, forcing the remaining female population to become parthenogenetic. These parasites and agents of disease may put evolutionary pressure on embiopterans to live more socially.[6]

Adult webspinners are vulnerable when they emerge from their galleries, and are preyed on by birds, geckos, ants and spiders. They have been observed being attacked by owlfly larvae. Birds may pull sheets of silk off the galleries to expose their prey, ants may cut holes to gain entry and harvestmen may pierce the silk to feed on the webspinners inside.[6]

Another group of associates inside the galleries are bugs in the family Plokiophilidae. Whether these are feeding on embiopteran eggs or larvae, on mites and other residents of the gallery, or are scavenging is unclear. The embiopteran Aposthonia ceylonica has been found living inside a colony of the Indian cooperative spider, probably feeding on algae growing on the spider sheetweb, and two webspinner species have been discovered living in the outer covering of termites' nests, where their silk galleries may protect them from attack.[6]

Embiopterans are distributed worldwide, and are found on every continent except Antarctica, with the highest density and diversity of species being in tropical regions.[19] Some common species have been accidentally transported to other parts of the world, while many native species are unobtrusive and yet to be detected. Some species live underground, or concealed under rocks or behind sections of loose bark. Others live out in the open, either swathed in sheets of white or blue silk, or hidden in less-conspicuous silken tubes, on the ground, on the trunks of trees or on the surface of granite rocks.[8]

Largely restricted to warmer locations, webspinners are found as far north as the state of Virginia in the United States (38°N), and as high as 3,500 m (11,500 ft) in Ecuador.[6] They were absent from Britain until 2019, when Aposthonia ceylonica, a southeast Asian species, was found in a glasshouse at the RHS Garden, Wisley.[35][36]

#asks #rambling

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