#tf2hcs

[yeetfort]

Mercs’ Phobias

Soldier - Wiccaphobia (fear of witches/witchcraft) Merasmus got him all screwed up on magic crap and while he’s not totally petrified of it, he just really hates the idea of it and doesn’t want it near him. If you’re Wicca yourself, he’ll actually try to have an open mind about it. Maybe you’ll even teach him some basic stuff about it! Otherwise, it doesn’t come up until you go to watch horror movies. He likes a movie that actually freaks him out, and it’s always witch-centered!

Scout - Trypanophobia (fear of injections) Poor scout, medic is just trying to give him his vaccinations but he hates getting shots so much. He can’t stand to see the needle go in, and he starts sweating and breathing irregularly. You always stay in there with him and let him squeeze your hand and keep his focus just anywhere else. Medic keeps those little lollipops you see in drs offices just for lil scoot to have after he gets one.

Demo - Toxiphobia (fear of being poisoned) He’s so worried that he won’t be paying attention while drinking one day and someone will slip some drugs or deadly poison into his cup. He knows what some of those chemical agents can do, and he couldn’t imagine a worse kind of death, even if he does respawn afterward. You’re the only person he lets handle his alcohol after he’s already opened it.

Engie - Nebulaphobia (fear of fog. This is especially terrible at night for him) Engie likes everything to be clear-cut and visible. Even the most complex things have very clear inner workings. He cannot stand to think of anything clouding his view, whether physically or mentally. If they have to go to battle on a foggy day, you keep a foglight which, while not removing the problem, brings him some comfort knowing that he doesn’t have to be alone when facing it.

Heavy - Autophobia (fear of being alone) Heavy has spent his whole life around family and friends. He can handle some solitary life, but he knows he always has someone to come back to, namely you. You spend quality time together most every day, and reassure him He doesn’t know what he would do if it were all gone.

Pyro - Eisoptrophobia (fear of seeing oneself in a mirror) Even with his mask on, pyro hates to see himself. He doesn’t want to think about what’s under the mask, whatever it is. After a very lengthy building-up of trust, he let you get a look at him, but he absolutely refuses to face it himself. The base has mirrors only in individual rooms and one part of the communal bathroom, so it is never really too bad of a problem.

Spy - Gamophobia (fear of marriage) Because of his job, spy was always moving from place to place and found it hard to stay for any meaningful length of time. He can’t stay committed in anything as serious as a marriage; it would tie him to something. He’s so anxious that what you have will become really serious, and you’ll to start to talk about having a future together. He dreads that if he came clean about those reservations, he’d break your heart and you wouldn’t think he loved you.

Sniper - Agoraphobia (fear of crowded spaces) He’s spent most of his life socially isolated and is very awkward around others. He gets so overwhelmed in any kind of crowd, and he doesn’t want to embarrass himself by reacting to that fear. You encourage him to come to places with you, but are always by his side holding his hand and telling him to focus on you when he gets too anxious about it.

Medic - Gelotophobia (fear of being laughed at) He was ridiculed for odd behavior throughout his childhood, and even into his adult life when others in the medical field said his work was laughably bad. He is reluctant to do experiments with anyone watching or share details about himself with anyone. It takes him a while to open up to you, and even that was only because you’d come into his office and marvel at jars of old experiments. You don’t ever laugh when he tells you his worries, and you’re the one person he has confidence in.

A/N: Personally, I have scopophobia and casadastraphobia (fear of falling up into the sky) Like, as if gravity is just gonna fail. It’s especially bad if I look up into a blue sky with few clouds and no visible grounding objects. Add your phobia in the tags!

[tf2eri]

headcanon: spy speaks spanish super fluently and he likes reading and writing spanish poetry

from a fellow spanish pal

[transheavy]

@tf2hcs please pelase pelase shut the fuck up about engineer bei g acowboy please please pelas eplea

[teamfortressaswell]

this is tf2hcs on my main, thank you so much for the compliments on my art ;_; ur tags made me so happy sdfrksjljsdfklsd

Ur art is so good I’m blown away!!! <333

[yeetfort]

Mercs with a pregnant lover,,,please go ham on quirks or protective behaviors i would die for paternal mercs

Oh my god. Ooooh my god. OoOooOOOhHHHMy GO

Soldier

- VERY EXCITED TO BE A DAD

- you know that stupid happy grin he pulls in the comics? It’s that, every time he thinks about it

- It almost...grounds him a little bit? He’s more sane and down to earth now that you’ve got a little one on the way

- Starts trying very hard not to randomly yell all the time

- Still says the same stuff tho, but he says it to ur pregnant tum

- Shushes other people if they’re being too loud around you

- Secretly hopes you have a girl

Scout

- This fucking guy. He can’t shut up about it. Tells his friends, absolutely boasts about it

- When you told him you were pregnant he just whispered “Oh my god we’re having kids” and got all teary eyed about it

- Will gladly indulge your weird cravings (chocolate covered pickles or some shit) and uh...might actually join in because let’s face it he’ll put some questionable stuff into his mouth

- Tends to your every need, offers to do literally anything and everything for you

- You were already his queen but this is a new level of dedication

- Total adoration. He’s so excited.

Demo

- Shocked because?? What the fuck he never imagined being a dad

- High key sobers up and gets clean because he wants to set a really good example for his kid(s)

- Supports you throughout pregnancy, sits with you and will rub your back when it hurts

- Sings to you and the baby

- Paints the nursery room and decorates it with you

Engie

- “Oh, you’re pregnant? Well here let me draw up plans for a whole fully-equipped crib that is entirely safety proofed and-“

- Way overplans for everything!

- Bought the exact same baby clothes in several different colors, baby-proofs the entire house....you’re only like four months along.

- Honey slow down

- If you didn’t want to have the baby sleep in a crib in your own bedroom he would literally have built an entire one-room extension on the base with soundproofing and everything (it almost happened)

- Definitely sets up an extra sentry outside ur window...just in case

Heavy

- BEAR HUSBAND

- Picks you up and holds you and is like “mess with my s/o and you fucking die”

- Tells his family; they are so happy for you!!!

- He’s kinda overprotective, doesn’t like for you to be by yourself for too long

- Side note: Zhanna is the BEST sister in law and offers to babysit in the future. Somehow you don’t foresee it ending terribly well.

- He wants to teach his child how to read very early on in life and gets both English and Russian children’s books

- As the due date comes closer he gets more and more excited and you talk about it more often

- Just.....family

Pyro

- *muffled “HUDDAH!!”*

- Paints the room into pyroland; rainbows, unicorns, cotton candy clouds - you name it, it’s in there

- Except that uh...it was all just straight up murals of fire at first. Some of it stayed, but you worked the nicer stuff in

- Super excited when your baby bump becomes more noticeable

- Full of love

Spy

- initially, he is extremely nervous about having a kid

- After all....last time he did, it didn’t go so well. He’s still very shameful about it.

- However, when he sees you light up talking about your future together with a child he can’t help but smile and encourage your vision

- He is determined not to repeat his past mistakes and stays by your side the whole way through

- He adores you and will always be ready to protect you and your baby

Sniper

- Gets all sniffly and just brings you in wraps his arms around you and tells you how much he loves you

- He doesn’t think that he’s fit to be a dad, but nearly every day you tell him how great he’ll be, and he feels just a little more confident

- Will off a motherfucker if they say anything to you that makes you even mildly upset

- Buys so many animal books. So many.

- Cleans and cooks for you especially on days when it’s a little worse

- Still in total disbelief that he will be Dad Man™

Medic

- Usually he’s not all touchy feely but after you tell him you’re pregnant this changes drastically

- Lifts you off your feet in a sweeping, strong hug and giggles while kissing you

- Becomes...very soft....

- Unless someone tries to fuck with you and then wow that is far too graphic to go over in a cute fluff post

- He checks your health very often and makes sure you get everything you need

- Very good at helping thru morning sickness, and afterwards he sits with you for a while and pets your tummy absentmindedly while you rest and he reads

- Somehow, the entire situation calms him down as a person and he’s just kind of mellow and lovey.

A/N: I may be going on a temporary hiatus for about a week or so to get settled into college. I am not leaving you!!! I shall be back shortly. Thank you all so much for choosing to follow me, and I look forward to writing more for you soon!

[yeetfort]

It’s 9:55 pm

Ok so self ship fic with medic specifically where medic is just out and about maybe shopping or whatever and also he has Archimedes because he’s a weird fuckin dude and takes his birds everywhere. Archimedes sees u and maybe you have a shiny thing they like in your hair and they go Ape Shitte™ and fly over and land on your head and nest on it like it’s a totally normal thing and ur like “????????????? This sweet little bird just fuckin asserted itself on me but I like it because how cute” and medic immediately crushes hard because this very attractive person (yes, you are extremely attractive, and I don’t mean just your idealized self, I mean YOU! YOU THERE! Handsome, gorgeous, breathtaking) just got absolutely loved up on by his favorite bird, and may I add, a bird that does not like everyone, and he only trusts people that his bird likes and holds them in high respect. ANYWAYS you’ve got this pretty little bird on your head and this dude is like “I’m so sorry, he just gets a little excited around pretty people”. Your fluster meter is at like 100% while this handsome dude who just said you’re good-looking untangles his cute bird from your hair. After walking and talking together a little more and getting to know each other, you’re both just kind of like “guess I’m in love now :/” and like...it just grows from there bro.

And that’s the meet-cute story you tell your kids and friends.

[yeetfort]

Hcs for medic with an s/o whos a dumb bitch and cant get shit and doesnt know things but still rlly likes when he explains shit,,,

I’m gonna tell you what I DON’T do....I don’t KNOW shit, I don’t GET stuff, and I don’t understand THINGS.

Medic and curious lil dummy S/O

- it’s not that you’re stupid but...

- Well, you’re really curious about everything, but are too excited to know what it is that you don’t use any critical thinking skills

- He’s really patient with you surprisingly. It seems like it would be something that might drive him up the wall, but he loves to share his interests with you

- He’ll be working on something and will tell you what he’s doing while he’s doing it

- He infodumps without realizing it a lot, which you don’t mind even if you don’t get what he’s talking about

- Sometimes he surprise kisses you to get you to shut up and stop asking questions for a little bit

- You’re too flustered for a little while after that to even comprehend anything

- Also, you don’t seem to absorb literally any information whatsoever unless he explicitly tells you every detail.

- Secretly, you sometimes just ask about things so you can hear him talk

[yeetfort]

Mercs with a lover who's autistic and rocks and chews to stim, and is mortified when their mercenary bf finds out because they're so used to getting bullied over it?

Okay so I’m not autistic, but I tried to be as respectful as possible when answering these! The last thing I would want to do is spread misinformation, so please tell me if something is offensive or just flatout incorrect!

Soldier usually abides by “everyone’s business is their own”, and he really wasn’t trying to pry, but he just curiously asks what you’re doing. After you tell him, he can’t understand why you’re SO embarrassed, but tells you that you don’t have to hide it and in fact should be proud that something so little makes you so happy!

Scout laughs upon seeing it just because he wasn’t expecting it, but when he sees how embarrassed and upset you are, he apologizes profusely and assures you that he isn’t making fun of you. He probably offers to beat up any stupid mfs that try to make you feel bad about it.

Demo doesn’t think it’s any “weirder” or more shameful than being absolutely shitfaced 95% of the time. Realistically, he probably wouldn’t have noticed at all had you not said anything. He tells you not to worry, that it’s perfectly normal and good as long as it’s making you happy.

Engie actively encourages it as an outlet for you. He probably makes you new chewables when your old ones start to get rough-lookin. The ones he makes don’t wear out nearly as fast! He thinks it’s sweet that you prefer his.

Heavy can understand why you might not want anyone to see you stimming after you explain to him about being taunted for it. He’ll respect your space if you want to do it in private only, but he doesn’t mind it at all if you’re doing it in his presence.

Pyro would never have even thought to make fun of you for it?? He does it all the time! (Although he chews when no one else is looking because he has to remove part of the mask.) He thought everyone did that, just in private, so really he’s more just sorry to have walked in on you! You start doing it around each other regularly without fear of shame.

Spy has seen everything. Out of all the things he’s had to bear witness to, on the scale of “slightly strange” to “grossly offensive”, this just doesn’t even rank. You’re not bothering anyone, so why poke at it? He just lets you do you.

Sniper just shrugs and carries on. What does he have against it? Nothing. If you’re really worried about it, he’ll reassure you that it doesn’t make him think any differently of you and that as long as it’s beneficial for you, to keep on with it.

Medic has seen many cases with patients on the autism spectrum throughout the years, especially in medical school, so this isn’t anything new or shocking. It can actually help him to tell when you’re happy or getting too nervous/overstimulated in a given situation, and he’ll help you away from it.

A/N: sorry for not posting in a few days. I’m not going to be able to post as much very soon, but I will try to complete a request at least a few times a week! Thanks!!

[yeetfort]

Could you write something about how which mercs are more traditional in their relationship when it comes to gender roles and more old timey dating “rules”

Me likey, anon. Also, I’m gonna assume you’re talking about a fem S/O just because of the dynamics at play

Soldier is such a mixture of it. He holds himself to “man standards”, but does not expect you to follow any particular rules regarding gender. His manliness is more of the WarriorMale variety! Anyone can be manly!

Scout sure might act like he’s some big shot frat boy, but when it comes down to it, 70% of his BONK drinks are Respect Women Juice™. He does like to be the one to pay for dinner and calls you “his girl”. He’s a little possessive, but more in the “clingy because he adores you” way.

Demo doesn’t give a fuck, as long as you’ll drink with him. He does secretly get a little turned on when you go full feminine in the bedroom, maybe with some lacy lingerie of your fave color. He appreciates when you’re more emotionally soft and sensitive, but he never forces you to be like that.

Engie is definitely influenced by gendered customs but doesn’t always expect them. He prefers a gf who’s a bit shorter than he is, if just by a little. He’s such a sucker for a housewife and likes good domestic traits like if you work well with kids and are great at cooking/cleaning. This man just wants to be a really good hubby.

Heavy thinks very highly of women in general, but when he’s in a relationship, he feels like he needs to protect you at all costs. He might not let you do certain “dangerous” activities with him or hold his guns/weapons because of his concern for your wellbeing.

Pyro - cannot care less about stupid social rules; he just wants to be with you. Although, he’d really prefer his S/O to like the same “””girly””” stuff he does!

Spy appreciates a “womanly” S/O who appears refined and sophisticated. He’ll have you wear stylish dresses and jewelry and kind of have you hang off of his arm when you’re walking around together on a date. He probably spends exorbitant amounts of money on high quality perfume and makeup for you to wear for him.

Sniper doesn’t necessarily care about how other people view your relationship roles, but likes to be reminded every once in a while that someone needs him. He wants someone to really depend upon him for affection.

Medic treats you like a lady, as it might be best described. He’ll be very gentlemanly with you on a date, and at home he’ll want you to act more subservient to him. Even though he knows you have a strong character, he’s the dominant one in the relationship and by god will he make sure that you know it.

[yeetfort]

What are the mercs ideal perfect date?

I’m sorry I haven’t posted like all day today. Rough night last night (migraine gang anyone?)

Anyways these were..so cute and nice to write and I just....this one is sweet ok

Soldier - Date night would probably be full of exploding stuff, whether that means you shoot off bottle rockets in the desert while the sun sets or through the windows of the opposing team’s base.

Scout - Ideally, he would like to take you out to a nice dinner like spy would, but he’s kind of broke. Fuck it, he says, and you instead get hot dogs from a 7/11 and go around back to the dumpster to hit beer cans and fluorescent lightbulbs with his baseball bat. He scores more hits than you, but you put up a good fight! It’s a perfect night (and probably ends in some sweet sex tbh).

Demo - He prefers to stay in together for the night and make fruity cocktails for you and have some dance music playing. Some of it will be partying music, but occasionally a slow song will come on and you’ll lean into each other and sway gently to the rhythm.

Engie - You would bake something together, and it would probably be apple pie. You’d sit on the couch and watch a movie while you ate; he always wants to let you choose which movie to watch.

Heavy - Another man that likes to cook with/for you. He will almost certainly make something from his culture, like piroshkis (he quickly caught on that these were your fave). Afterwards, you’d sit leaning against his arm and read together until one or both of you fell asleep.

Pyro - Bonfire, bonfire, bonfire! You make a big stone pit behind the base to house the flames. You’ll have those pine cones and powder that you can throw in to make the fire light up pretty colors! He just loves to see you in the soft glow of the sparks before you (even though for him it’s more like you’re basking in the light of a rainbow fountain).

Spy - Augh, this guy is SO cheesy and he knows it! He goes all out sometimes, with a fancy dinner and wine and late night shopping in some fairly expensive brand stores. He almost always gets you a really nice piece of jewelry without your noticing so he can surprise you later when you get home. You have a small....collection, now.

Sniper - He tells you to pack an overnight bag and takes you way out to a place with no cities for miles. You do a little bit of night hunting and maybe have a little fire and tell each other stories until the sun goes down. When it finally sets, you climb up his camper and lay down to see the endless expanse of stars before you. There’s no light pollution out this far, and you can even see the dust of the Milky Way. You probably shared your first kiss like this.

Medic - Surprisingly, even though he’s normally a crazy bastard, medic likes a relatively normal and tame date: you’ll go out to a nice but not too lavish dinner, catch a movie (he’s a sucker for drive-in theaters, if you can find one). The whole time he’ll just gush over you and how nice you look and tell you how much he loves you. Before you started going out, you didn’t know he had such a sweet side!

[yeetfort]

Hi there if you're feeling up to it, could u do a headcanon of how mercs would react to an s/o with ptsd? How would they handle flashbacks, night terrors, etc?

Ahyy night terror gang (they aren’t fun but hey at least we aren’t alone) and also I don’t know very much about ptsd and I looked up some stuff but I’m sorry if some of it is inaccurate!

Soldier likely has PTSD himself, and can see when your eyes become wide and glazed over remembering and reliving a traumatic event. Sometimes it’s out of nowhere, but he is always prepared to console you.

Scout finds u sleepwalking during a nightmare. He remembers reading that he shouldn’t touch you or try to wake you up, but it pains him to see you walking around helplessly, especially if you’re crying.

Demo can tell when you’re in a particularly negative mood. He’ll sing songs with you and tell stories to pass the time. Maybe, if only just for a little while, he can make you forget it all like it never happened.

Engie holds your hands tightly to ground you during flashbacks. He can’t stand when he looks at you in the eyes and you’re just...somewhere else entirely. Somewhere bad. A place he just wants to be able to bring you away from forever and hold you tight so that you never have to go back.

Heavy has had his fair share of extremely traumatic events that he’s had to move past, so he regularly helps you go to therapy and find healthy coping mechanisms. He promises you that even though the experiences and memories may never go away, the pain can be eased. He’s a wonderful support system.

Pyro doesn’t immediately understand what’s wrong, but tries his best to “cheer you up” when you’re emotionally not doing so hot. After being together for a while, you confide in him what the problem is, and maybe even tell him exactly what happened. He does his best to keep you away from your triggers.

Spy knows the gravity of the situation you’re in, and tells you that he’s willing to help you in any way he can. He is physically by your side 100% of the time if you know you’re in a fragile state that day or if you think you might encounter anything that could trigger a flashback.

Sniper knew since before you were together. You’d told him about it when you were still just friendly with each other, and he regularly helped you through some serious flashbacks. He reminds you to take your meds every morning and night if you have any, and always takes you to do something fun after therapy as an incentive to go.

Medic had known that you were prescribed medications for the condition, but had ever seen it firsthand. He woke up one night next to you in bed in kind of a daze, and realized that you were breathing irregularly and crying in your sleep. You screamed once and were immediately awake. This happens every so often, and when it does, he’ll hold you and tell you sweet nothings until you can fall asleep again.

I’m sorry these took so long! Got kind of busy the last few days.

[yeetfort]

how about the mercs with a S/O who collects and takes care of snakes! (snakes are so goddamn cute)

I agree they are SO cute! Personally, yellow/orange corn snakes are my fave! (I like to call them “candy corn snakes”)

Soldier likes the ones that are really well-camouflaged, and compliments them directly: “You, sir, are hard to spot! A covert agent! We need more men like you!” Sometimes you’ll find him holding one and telling it how big and strong it is.

Scout draws them all the time. Sometimes they’ll be good little models and stay still, but occasionally they’ll get wiggly and not stay in the same spot for very long so he just draws them as little doodle noodles. He sticks them in your wall as little presents from him.

Demo thinks that the venomous ones are fascinating. However, he knows not to fuck with them, and lets you do most of the handling, even for the non-venomous ones. Even though it’s from afar, he’s a fan and actively encourages your interests!

Engie grew up in Texas, and is very wary of snakes. He saw a few idiot friends get bitten by rattlers in his childhood, and when you showed him the few snakes you kept, his hair stood on end. He thinks they’re pretty to look at and supports your enthusiasm for them, but honestly? He really hopes you don’t ask him to feed them or anything.

Heavy has a very high regard for the natural world in general and will help you take care of them. They strike him as being very intelligent little creatures, and he treats them as such. You like to tell him snake facts whenever you’re handling them together, and he always enjoys hearing about them.

Pyro only sees babeys whenever your snakes are out and about. If you have a Burmese Python, that would be his favorite! They’re like big, squishy noodles that just happen to have sharp mouths! He holds them often and “kisses” their lil heads with his mask on.

Spy appreciates the snakes that employ mimicry in their coloring, like the scarlet kingsnake imitating the coral snake. They can be very sneaky like he is, and sometimes if you have them out, one will slither by his feet and he’ll lean down to let it climb up his arm. It kind of warms his heart that you are willing to share your (admittedly, very cool) interest with him.

Sniper is the Snake KING! This guy grew up with them and he loves them to death, but respects that they are fierce and sometimes dangerous creatures. He will actively hunt out very rare snakes to take back so you can keep them. Oftentimes you’ll sit together and a tiny snake will be curled around both of your arms. You’re basically running a little zoo together.

Medic probably freaks the fuck out the first time he sees you holding one. It’s a snake! They eat birds! You gently explain that not all snakes eat birds and yours won’t try since they’re fed well and also locked up. He comes around fairly quickly, particularly after seeing some of the especially cute ones, like the little green garden snakes.

[yeetfort]

Mercs’ pet names for you (and yours for them)

Soldier

His for you: “Possum”, “Tinkerbelle”, “Sweetheart”

Yours for him: calling him your “Big Strong Soldier” absolutely fucking destroys him every time

Scout

His for you: “Sweet Cheeks”, “Cherry Pie”, “Toots”

Yours for him: “Sweet Thing”, “Stud” (jokingly)

Demo

His for you: “Gorgeous”, “My Dazzling darling/sir/lady”, “Sunshine”

Yours for him: “Sugar”, “My Love”

Engie

His for you: “Darlin’”, “Honey-pie”, “Puddin’”

Yours for him: “Punkin” (like pumpkin but way cuter), “Baby”

Heavy

His for you: “Kiska”, “Liybimaya”, “Solnishko”

Yours for him: “Bear”, “Hunk”

Pyro

His for you: “mrrrpph”, “mrrphphrrpm!”, and one you’re pretty sure is “Unicorn”

Yours for him: “Cutie-pie”, “Marshmallow”

Spy

His for you: “Mon Cher/Ma Cherie”, “Mon Petit Chou Chou”, “Mon Coeur”

Yours for him: “Angel”, “Loulou”

Sniper

His for you: “Roo”, “Love”, “Starshine”

Yours for him: “Snake King”, “Honey”

Medic

His for you: “Schatz”, “Liebe”, “Kätzchen”

Yours for him: “Doc”, “Darling”

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your tag fucking murdered me who's gonna bite the bullet and make the scout weenie man edit first JWODKDKDKWK

@tf2hcs did. he did. i hate him so fucking much for it