#thankfully it's been a slow month at work overall

[ingo-ingoing-ingone]

Another year come and gone!

It's been two years since I began my submas hyperfixation! I am still so, so glad I did, and I owe pretty much everything to this fandom!

I have to say, though, from March of 2023 to now has been... a rough year for me, overall. It's been REALLY hard for various reasons, and I thank both my friends and followers for your help and support. I apologize things have been so slow in coming out! I just need more time than I used to, is all. Most of the bad stuff was not related to any fandom at all, thankfully! Some of it was, but that's the risk of being in a fandom.

I am hoping that the March 2024-2025 period is kinder to me.

I did do a lot of cool submas stuff, though. My longfic surpassed 100k words. A zine I was in was released! My first one! And I got into another zine as well! I flew across the USA to meet up with friends and go to a con! I met Emmet's english anime VA! I got to meet other incredible people in cosplay! I got to do so much, and I am so, so grateful for that.

So cheers to another year of submas :)

Tomorrow, the 29th of March, marks 2 years also since I posted my very first submas fic, Closing Doors. While this year I have no new oneshot to post, I will be posting the next chapter of ABYS! I have a lot of things in the works, but burnout and mental health has gotten in the way. I hope y'all understand <3

I'll be posting it from a con too lol, where I will be cosplaying as Emmet! The 2 year anniversary of the first time I cosplayed Emmet! (Not to the day, the con switches what months it's held in every year)

Happy two years, everyone, and here's to many more <3

Here's last year's post :)

[mindblindbard]

It’s a Bird, It’s a Plane, It’s a Mind Blind Update

It’s been a hot minute since I last updated here. Several hot minutes, if I’m being honest. And no, despite my usage of that phrase, the colloquialism “hot minute” still doesn’t make any sense to me. But it makes me envision hourglasses wearing bikinis.

Anyhow! A lot has happened.

I’m still chugging away at Mind Blind’s rewrite, and currently working on Chapter 9 for Mind Blind 2.0. I have to finish reworking Chapters 10-17 (10-14 should be easy, 15-17 need copious work), and then I’ll finally have a solid enough foundation to code in the two final chapters, most variations of which are already completely written! I may release the endings in advance as a word doc for Patrons since editing has been slow going, but we’ll see.

As for why I haven’t been on Tumblr for the past two months . . .

Well, it’s not great news. My amazing, phenomenal, “what-do-you-mean-she’s-not-invulnerable?!” mom was diagnosed with cancer a few months ago. She didn’t show any symptoms, and it was caught during a routine checkup (so see your doctor on the reg, folks!). While initially hopeful that it would be treatable via surgery, we recently learned that it was actually a much later stage and that she’ll need six months of chemo.

Thankfully, writing full-time meant that I was able to pack up my suitcase and relocate to Seattle until the end of the year. My schedule’s become a bit more hectic, but things should settle within the next few weeks once my mother’s appointments begin. I’ve set up a secondary office in what used to be my brother’s bedroom (I am surrounded by Garfield comics and obscure philosophy books), and I hope to return to return to Chicago to bring back my computer since my old laptop is . . . less than ideal.

And by “less than ideal,” I mean that my laptop’s fan sounds like an asthmatic jet engine panting its way up a very steep hill.

Overall, I’m on track to submit Mind Blind this fall! My mom’s prognosis is good with treatment (although I’m still reeling over the confirmation that she’s not, in fact, invincible), and I’m doing my best to remain optimistic and hopeful.

[lia-land]

Throne of Glass

2.5/5 stars

*Spoilers for the first book in the Throne of Glass series.

This was boring and slow. I would have stopped reading early on had it been any other author, but I ended up resorting to the audiobook only because I love A Court of Thorns and Roses and have seen SJM’s storytelling potential in that series. If I had read this book before ACOTAR, I would have likely stopped reading and not been interested in any of her other works either. I understand that she was around 16 when she wrote this book, but did an editor not go through it? What—perhaps irrationally—annoyed me was the use of so many exclamation marks. 221 of them, to be exact. Here’s some examples from one chapter 2:

She’d forgotten there was anyone else in the room. She looked at her rags and stained skin, and she couldn’t suppress the twinge of shame. What a miserable state for a girl of former beauty!

But now, standing before Dorian Havilliard as little more than a gutter rat!

“Four months,” Chaol said, “after Sardothien arrived, she attempted to flee.”

She waited for the rest of the story, but he was clearly finished. “That’s not even the best part!”

“There’s a ‘best part’?” the Crown Prince said, face caught between a wince and a smile. (This line specifically is a great summary for how I felt while reading this whole book)

Dorian grinned. “What remarkable eyes you have! And how angry you are!”

…And this is all just from one chapter. The second chapter, specifically. As far as first impressions go, this was not a good one. Maybe I’m just not used to seeing this in other books, but thankfully, SJM does drop the exclamation marks for the rest of this series.

The entirety of the first interaction between Celaena, Chaol, and Dorian in Endovier felt like a very young writer wrote it. I’m talking 12 or 13. The dynamic seemed strange as well because they’re all talking to each other like old friends, but they don’t have any previous relationship. I think Celaena was meant to come across as badass, but I found her insufferable and sort of fake. A lot of her remarks through this book were cringey.

There are only two things that I was interested in: Dorian, and the competition. Both lead to disappointment. The competition was such a cool concept based on how it was described and I was excited to see some sort of Hunger Games style situation where it was a continuous and deadly arena sort of thing. I was so underwhelmed when it ended up being weekly ‘tests’ like archery and climbing. It wasn’t even really that necessary for the overall plot of the series. It had so much potential, and nothing was done with it. 

It’s worth mentioning that I chose to read Assassin’s Blade as the third in the series as SJM recommends, so maybe I just didn’t have any reason to connect with Celaena in Throne of Glass, but having read Assassin’s Blade at the time of writing this, I can’t imagine I’d have cared enough about any of the characters to get through it as a first book.

The series does drastically improve after Crown of Midnight/Assassin’s Blade in both plot and writing style, as many others have said. I don’t think any book series should take 3 and a half books to get good, but I stuck with it only because it’s SJM. This book gives context and adds to the world building (as does book 2), but this could have easily been combined with Crown of Midnight. ACOTAR felt like a prequel until Under the Mountain, so I went in with the mindset of not expecting much from the start of this series either. I did wonder while reading this book if this series would have benefitted from the first person POV that ACOTAR had, but SJM does get better with third person as ToG goes on and it ends up working eventually.

I’m a very slow reader, like it will take me a full day of reading to get through 200 pages, so I would not have stuck to this series had I not read ACOTAR before it. I extended the courtesy to SJM on this occasion, but I likely would not have done so for other authors and would have missed out on the intricate story that unfolds throughout the rest of the series, as many others have.

It’s worth putting up with this book and the next one in order to get 5 good books (5 because CoM and Tower of Dawn are not great). I haven’t found that Celaena gets any less annoying, but she is unlike any other main character I’ve read about so almost as interesting as she is annoying.

[livewildlivefree]

Desolate Paradise July/August Update

Hey another monthly update, but it isn’t a good one...

You see I’ve been dealing with a lot bad luck during these last few months trying to tackle my life issues, it’s like a roller coaster that I can’t get off of.

Like holy cow, it’s never ending...

Anyways during the beginning of July, I’ve been working really hard on finishing Kane’s character reference and making a lot of headway through the first half.  

Of course just when stuff is going well, my unlucky streak has to ruin it yet again.

Around the middle end of July, this happened...

Yeah... 

Basically my body kinda gave out on me. Nothing seriously wrong, but I had a horrible pinch nerve that stopped me from continuing on with Kane’s bio or even getting any drawing content out. The best way I can explain it, I couldn’t sit down or even stand for long to do anything.

It sucked because I was hoping to finish him in July, but I was able to finish at least this much.

The whole half end of July I was forced to be bedridden and rest a lot to heal my poor back and hips.

I was really annoyed because I was hoping to get him out of the way by the end of the July deadline I set for myself. Sometimes it makes me feel like I’m a failure and disappointing you guy’s with more delays. On the positive side I do see the massive progression I’ve made in 2023 compared to the last four years since I’ve started. I feel that I’m getting closer to my biggest goal for the Desolate Paradise project.

I’m just rolling with the punches with the bad luck in my life and it won’t be discouraging me anytime soon.

Now with that out of the way.

I can thankfully say that in the beginning of August I was able to finally finish Kane’s character bio!

Yay! Whoopee for me!

Meaning that I’ll be taking a break from writing for a while and turn my focus on making drawings and overall content for this blog for the next couple of month’s. I’m quite excited to start drawing the many ideas I have and using the new tools I’ve been experimenting with...

So stay tuned!

Now what will be going on in the future?

Well I can’t really say at the moment, due to what I’ve experienced in the last few month’s. A lot of stuff is going on in my life and important stuff that needs to be addressed before anything.

Which is stressful for me but I know it needs to be done.

All I can really say is that I’ll be drawing for the time being as promised but the pace might be slow and having longer pauses.

Once I get these stressful things out the way, hopefully things will get back to normal again.

 I’m sorry about this guy’s, but sometimes I can’t control the curves that life throws at me. I’m doing my best to my abilities to keep going through these rough patches to accomplish my goals.

Just give me time...

Thank you for listening and have a good day!

[willmarstudios]

Bookworm Will Review 2024 (#6)

Title: 'The Orc Prince Trilogy'

Author: Lionel Hart

Rating: 2/5

Review: (MILD SPOILERS)

I've been sitting on this trilogy for a few months now and the excitement I got to finally read it was met with disappointment. :' )

The concept was something I was beyond ready for (queer fantasy involving orcs is SO my thing!) and while I kept hope, the plot and pacing were what let me down. To me, it felt very first draft with some minor spelling errors. The world-building was intriguing because it included things like reproduction between two male-identifying individuals which I don't usually see a lot of discussion about, however, it was really glossed over right after being introduced. Thankfully there wasn't just a cop-out to say 'Oh it works because of magic'. In response to the surface-level details, the plot felt like it wasn't sure if it was trying to be a cozy fantasy or erotica. The line between them wasn't really well established.

That being said, it did have some really nice/cute moments of their relationship-building/exploring. I did fanboy over one flirty scene in particular which gave me hope about the rest of the series. Credit where credit is due! I wish the two MCs weren't the same muscle twinks types, but it is what it is. I'm also really biased on what I find attractive (iykyk) Plus the smut felt really copy+paste each time it happened causing it to get stale.

Overall I think this could've used a bit more editing and story fleshing out in terms of pacing and which subplots to focus in on (some parts were really slow and felt, not out of place, but not needed).

Still love the genre, just not my favorite rendition.

[the---hermit]

Work in progress of the September cover page in my bullet journal, inspire by this postcard I got in Amsterdam years ago (and had already sort of recreated in my sketchbook when I got it), and my current read.

16|08|2022

I am definitely back from my holiays at the seaside. To be honest with you I would need a few more weeks to get back all my energy, but unfortunately that is not possible. I will no get back on more regular posts as I normally do. In general these past few months have been quite tough, and I am still not at my best mentally. I have kept a sort of productivity of which I am happy, but I will admit I have felt my mental health slowly deteriorating in these past months. I am activly working on myself, and trying to be as kind to myself as possible, but I'm not going to lie it's not always easy, and I feel myself getting more and more tired. I am talking about this on here, because I feel like on studyblr we are always talking about being productive and doing stuff, but life is made up of a lot of things that do influence you and your productivity. Those couple of holiday weeks were really needed, and certainly helped, but the consequences of being back are having to deal with a bunch of stuff. Overall when I was at the seaside I did not study as much as planned, and that's fine cause I needed to rest, but now I need to organize my study and work and just do stuff. Today was a slow start but I am proud of myself for what I did, because I tackled on of the university tasks that gives me more anxiety, which is to pick the new courses for the year. Although I have yet to get my degree (which will happen in November) in September I'll start with my master's courses. This morning I basically went through all the options I had for the first year's classes and picked what I'll be studying. There was a lot to pick from and I might decide to switch some classes in the future, but I now have a general idea of the first courses of my masters. I can already tell that I will not be able to complete everything in the span of the first year, because it's way too much to physically follow all courses and study for all exams. Thankfully uni is not as strict on this. I am quite excited for some classes, a couple I had to pick because they were the best option in a not so geart group of classes, but in the end I am pretty excited to get back to class! I am definitely intimidated after more than two years of studying at home and not physically go to uni, but I am also looking forward to this new start. You'll probably hear me rant about this stuff in my next posts. As I said I am really proud of myself for not procrastinating this task of picking my classes, because it makes me really anxious and that would have fucked me up at the moment. Aside from that I did a bit of planning for whaT I want to study this week, but I am not sure how much I'll be able to follow that plan, we'll see. In the afternoon I helped my dad to buld some new shelves, and doing this type of work with him is one of my favourite things in the world, so that was really therapeutic.

[woolywoofs]

I wanted to post a little update. And ask for a little help, again (paypal posted below, please dont feel pressured! you and your needs come first always).

Moppa and I are still grieving Skvetta, but we are managing now. She can be left alone now without panicking and she no longer searched for her in the yard.

I had my tonsils taken out last friday, on my birthday lol. Surgery itself went well, but beforehand did not. My IV infiltrated and all of the meds to calm me down and put me to sleep just went into my soft tissue. It was extremely painful and I started to have a panic attack on the table because of it + the oxygen mask makes me feel like im suffocating (i know it doesnt make sense haha). All hands on deck after that and I had 3 people on me at once sticking me trying to get IVs in me but my veins just kept breaking. It was actual hell and felt like forever.

Recovery has been a hot mess honestly. The first 3 days were fine and since then its been reaaal bad. The ear, throat and tongue pain is unreal. I am drugged out of my mind because pain/stress is a huge seizure trigger for me, but at this point it is not really working. I did have 1 bad seizure, to a point where i had broken capillaries in my face. But thankfully it didnt create any issues with my surgery recovery. Im hoping things will start improving soon.

Generally my epilepsy has fucked up a lot. My short term memory is messed up and I have lost some skill sets after the bad seizures. I have been re-learning how to draw and paint! It is a very tedious process but i really feel like im making progress.

My autoimmune disease has been lowkey out of control and I saw my rheumo and I am going back on a low dose chemo drug. It really did help last time, it just made me so sick. But we will be looking into every option to control my nausea etc! So im trying to be hopeful. Ill start once im completely healed from my tonsillectomy, since the meds make you more likely to get infections and slows healing.

My uterus has also been absolutely fucked, once again. We were really hoping that removing the mass, scraping my uterus and putting the IUD would stop the bleeding, and it did, for 6 months. But im having issues again and I saw a specialist and we decided that the only option left for me is a hysterectomy. There is a year long wait though. This wasnt exactly on my list of things to do at 27.. but i suppose it is what it is.

Now for some good. Moppa is healthy and happy. She was attacked by a dog in september and got a bad gash but shes completely healed! She loves the fenced yard. We have been working on nosework stuff when im feeling okay enough for it! She is honestly such a light in the dark and I love her.

I get to renew my lease next year so i dont have to worry about housing!! Rent will be increasing bc inflation but im okay with swapping some meals with ramen to make things work, when I cant make extra money. I have been learning how to quilt!! My grandma does it a lot and i asked her to teach me so I am working on a project with her.

While things are generally a hot mess right now, i am mostly okay. And i feel like thats a big improvement for me, im not sure I would have handled all this a year ago. And im proud of myself.

With everything going on, I have obviously been unable to do commissions, or taking in dogsitting clients or anything i typically do to make money. If anyone is able to help, it is really appreciated. *This is my PayPal*, im afraid its my only way to receive anything. *any* amount helps. I really hope this is the last time i ever have to ask for anything. I feel like things are going to turn around now that we have solid plans to help with my health issues. The hope is that once my uterus is out and the low dose chemo has gotten my overall pain under control, that my epilepsy will chill out. It seems to be easily triggered via pain and hormones.

Thanks to anyone who had the patience to read this thing. I just havent posted an update in so long that there was a lot to say 😅 i am going to start being more active on here as ai really miss it. I will include the 2 art pieces I managed to make and finish. It took forever to figure everything out but im proud of myself. Quality may be a little destroyed bc tumblr likes to do that... i really hope i can offer commissions again soon. I might choose a person or two at random that donates and do a ghost commission like below for them? I can at least try. But youd have to message me on here after donating so i know who you are, i think i can attempt dog, cat or rabbit. But i cant promise anything.

I talked forever, im so sorry lol. Here is the paypal again because its definitely lost up there in the babble

Just to end this.. Has anyone here had a tonsillectomy as an adult and can tell me at what point it got better?

[girlinlotsoffandoms]

she’s her daddy’s girl, her momma’s world - chapter 32

a very 51 christmas

sometimes work gets in the way of special moments but Stella has a plan - an alternate version to Maya's first Christmas

Read on AO3 or below

One of the best things that came from giving birth in October, Stella found, was that her maternity leave lasted throughout the end of the year. This meant she’d get to be fully present for her baby’s first Halloween, first Thanksgiving, and first Christmas. Stella was lucky and she loved it.

Kelly wasn’t nearly as lucky. His paternity leave didn’t last long, and he was already back at work by the time Halloween rolled around. Thankfully Stella was feeling good enough to dress Maya up and take her to the station so Kelly could see the newborn in her costume. 

He was off on Thanksgiving, but Kelly’s holiday off ended sooner than it was supposed to after he and Squad got called in to assist with a water rescue. The call ended well, and Kelly had been able to spend the majority of the day with his family so overall, it wasn’t the worst way to spend Maya’s first Thanksgiving.

Unfortunately, Firehouse 51’s second shift pulled the short straw once again and would be on shift for Christmas. Kelly tried to play it cool when he told Stella, but she knew better. As much as he loved being a firefighter and he loved the team at 51, Kelly would much rather spend the holiday with his wife and new baby.

Stella knew he was bummed, and she was too. So, she hatched a plan. 

It took no convincing to get Chloe and Cindy on board and soon all the other wives and significant others were in on the plan as well. Roles were assigned, food was ordered, decorations were purchased, and the children old enough to know what was going on were sworn to secrecy. Everything was perfect - they just needed Christmas to come so they could execute their plan.

                                                … … …

Christmas morning was a lively affair in the Severide household. Kelly had gotten up early to shower and make breakfast before leaving for the firehouse and Stella’s excitement for the day’s surprise had her too wound up to sleep. Maya seemed to pick up on her mother’s barely concealed excitement so the almost three-month-old was up early as well. 

Stella nursed her and tried to get her back to sleep, wanting the baby to be as rested as possible for the day ahead. As soon as Maya had fallen back asleep, Stella put her back in her bassinet and joined Kelly in the kitchen. 

They shared a quick breakfast and coffee before Kelly had to leave for the station. As soon as the door closed behind him, Stella returned to the kitchen and started preparing the food she'd been assigned for the day. 

It was slow going, with Maya waking up again about an hour into her prep, but Stella managed to get everything prepped.

With Maya secured in a baby wrap on Stella's chest and the Christmas group text alive with steady updates, Stella moved around the kitchen. She put a pie in the oven and started the potatoes to boil, all while gently rocking Maya and keeping an ear on the scanner.

It was just after 10:00 am when Stella heard the call she was waiting for—one that involved Truck, Engine, Squad, and Ambo. A full station call usually meant they'd be gone for at least a few hours, which meant this was the perfect time to head over there. 

Stella told the group chat as much then went around making sure she had everything Maya would need for the day, along with all the food. She fed Maya one more time, got the food loaded into the car, and then it was off to the firehouse.

As she drove the familiar route to the firehouse, the excitement started to build and chase out all the other emotions Stella was feeling.

                                             … … …

It was just past noon by the time the trucks rolled back into the station. The call had been just a simple house fire, likely caused by an uncleaned chimney. The fire had been put out quickly and the house had been saved, but the family ended up being displaced for the holiday, which was always hard.

Calls involving families were always hard, especially around the holidays, and morale already hadn’t been the highest from the start of the shift, so it was a rather quiet group of firefighters and paramedics that returned to the station. Everyone wanted to be home with their families instead of at work and even though they all loved their team, it just wasn’t the same.

Their moods brightened immediately when they entered the kitchen and common room and found their significant others and their kids standing around a buffet of food and twinkly decorations.

“Hey!” Herrmann called with a smile, one of the first through the door. He immediately walked over to Cindy and his kids.

The others followed suit, either going to hug and stand with their families or gather around the large spread of food. Kelly and Boden were the last two to walk in though their reactions were no less special.

“What’s all this?” the Squad Lieutenant asked with a smile. He went straight to Stella’s side and welcomed her with a kiss before taking Maya from her and peppering her with kisses.

Stella smiled at the sight—watching her husband be a father was something she’d never grow tired of seeing. “I know none of us like working on holidays but we figured an hour or two and Christmas lunch with your families would make things a little more bearable.”

“It was Stella’s idea,” Chloe added from where she was standing with Joe, Javi, and little Otis.

Kelly looked at his wife and gave her a beaming smile before kissing her again. “I love you.”

“I love you too.” Stella gave Kelly one more quick peck before turning to the others. “Let’s dig in!”

Needing no other instructions, the group of first responders and their families started making their plates and settling around the room to eat.

It wasn’t the way they’d envisioned spending Maya’s first Christmas, but Stella and Kelly couldn’t have been happier with how the day turned out. Holidays like Christmas were about family and the people at 51 were their family too.

[unclevladscorner]

Six months Post Top Surgery

It's officially been six months since my top surgery!

I was actually on the fence about top surgery for a long time and I finally committed and had surgery this past March.

The Good: I've been healing well without any complications or infections. Recovery was never very painful, and I was able to go back to work on time. I am a lot happier since I have a chest I actually like, and I've seen a HUGE reduction in dysphoric feelings about my body.

The reduction in dysphoria was actually unexpected. I originally committed to top surgery for purely cosmetic reasons.

The Ugly*- I'm not totally happy with how my nipples look and I'm still carrying some debt from the surgery.

Overall, I have no regrets. I'm still 100% happier after having my chest reconstructed than I was before the procedure. I'll share some images and more details under the cut-

All things said and done, I think everything turned out really well. I opted for a more expensive surgeon and a different type of gender affirming chest masculinization to preserve my nipple sensation.

I got buttonhole, which is the successor to T- anchor. You can read about it here-

So far, so good. Sensation is still returning in my chest, and my right nipple has the same level of sensation as the skin around it. It can take a year or more to regain any erogenous sensation in my nipples, though.

The left one has been a slow healer from the beginning. Slower to lose it's scab, slower to fully heal over, and it's been slower to regain sensation.

Both kind of look like they are 'melting' off my chest because of the big light spots around them and in the healing areola.

Scarring so far is actually really minimal, as you can see. No big dog ears at the sides, either. I had a lateral chest lift included to prevent dog earing.

My biggest scar is on my right side.

I suspect the skin became separated really early into the healing process when I lifted my arm too high over my head, or pulled on something the several days right after surgery. Thankfully the wound did not reopen or anything like that, but my right side was very sore while healing.

Even with my mild dissatisfaction in how my nipples look, I am still really happy with the results overall. I legit did not realize how much having top surgery would improve my overall quality of life.

The relief was almost immediate. It makes me really happy to see a much more masculine chest on my own body. My chest had lost a lot of mass over the last eight years and it was really saggy and unattractive. The change has really positively reinforced how much I feel at home in my own skin.

Working out has been easier, too. I'm at a point now where I can work out regularly, and I am much more comfortable doing so. I won't see any big muscle gains for a bit, but I'm looking forward to redefining my chest further through regular exercise.

For anyone out there on the fence, ow who's scared of getting gender affirming surgery-

-Research is key. What you want and how you want to look is the most important thing to consider. You want to pick someone who is both reputable and will do work you are happy with. It took me two years to pick a surgeon. Look at before and after photos, listen to former patients. There are more variety in what you can get and how the results look than in the past, too.

-Your reason for surgery doesn't have to be deep. I decided to get top surgery for purely cosmetic reasons. The rest has been a bonus.

-Start saving! Save some money now, and Future You will have an easier time doing what you need to do later. It's much easier to meet a small gap in funds through crowdfunding or loans. It can also help build a healthy financial habit you'll keep the rest of your life. Even if you don't know what you might want or need later, having money in the bank will make that possible. It doesn't have to be a lot, even $10-$20 a month will get you started and build the habit.

No matter what, remember that your happiness and comfort is more important than anything. Get joy where you can, and take care of yourself!

[aka217]

ok so 2022

(yes, 2022. I know this is just about a year old, and honestly i completed the writing maybe 6 months ago, but I just didn't get around to it. so apologize to my two readers - hello Ading, hello wife - I'll be doing one more of these, then with hope I'll be transitioning to monthly format on insta 2024. That should make these a little more interesting and easier to put together for tumblr.)

well then. what a difference a year makes. I remember 2021 kind of being 2020 part 2, and even after getting vaccinated it wasn't like things were back to normal. However in 2022 (and more so getting Covid post vaccinated) there was some assurance that maybe we can get back to things that once was. But on top of that, I made a major pivot to my career, as well as started traveling to new places, and even a new car. A lot of key points in my life have been impacted this year, so let's dive into it:

January - Start off with a seeing golden state warriors vs. the heat with a couple friends. Soon after we are flying back to Orlando to celebrate Justin and Susette's Wedding. At the time one of the covid variants was ramping up at this time, and it definitely felt like we were going backwards. I remember being pretty concerned, and if I weren't the best man there was real consideration to missing out on Justin's wedding, but seeing as he's very much my best friend it's kind of crazy to think we were considering it. But we went, masks and all, and what a wonderful time we had. Thankfully we got out of there unscathed. It was exhausting dancing so much under a mask, but overall if that small inconvenience relieved our concerns it was well worth it.

February - So I decided to leave HCI. Forever thankful that I was given the opportunity to come on board during the breakout of Covid, and really kept me and Ashley afloat during our move to California. But ultimately it wasn't a job I found enjoyable, as it leaned more into sales than engineering. And with Covid still at the time a looming presence, the idea of increasing the amount of customer visits this year was not my cup of tea. I had been in talks about pursuing a transition into project management, and again thanks to key friends that can connect me, I was well into talks about joining the tech world. Risky once more, I decided to leave before securing my next place. But as grateful as ever that things turned out alright for me, as I would soon after leaveing HCI secure my spot with Paramount+. What that did was allow me gain a small gap of funemploymet, and boy did I make good use of that. First was a local rental of a Porsche Boxster, taking through Napa, Sonoma, and up Mt. Diablo. Then shortly after we took a week long trip to Portland. Hanging out with Ashley's Aunt/Uncle/Cousin, we explored the city of Portland for a bit, and even made a trek out to Tillamook. Also in Portland, I rented an mx-5 and took it through the gorge, which is along the columbus river that naturally splits Oregon and Washington. Honestly, one of the most beautiful drives I've been on.

March - Relatively quiet, although I did start my job at Paramount+. Those early days were honestly pretty nice, as it was definitely slow paced with really no work and just taking it all in. Being my first remote job, it was an interesting adjustment in lifestyle. There were a few outings this month, including kareoke in sf, and a house warming for Francis and Nhi.

April - started out the month is a visit to the SF Giants game vs. Miami Marlins, we typically only go at this point to grab food and enjoy the atmosphere. Next was celebrating my Lexus' Quinceanera, 15 years and about 190,000 miles on the odometer. With brand new headlights and a well equipped roof rack, we had a mini photoshoot to celebrate. Soon after, getting ready for Coachella, Ashley gets Covid. We pin it to the baseball game, as that really was the only place Ashley went out in public. Oddly, I tested negative the whole time, and decided to still go to Coachella.

Alright Coachella. I'm writing this out as I may in the future forget, what what an experience. It was a lot, it was exhausting, but I don't regret it, but not sure I'd do it again. I'm someone who studied the festival lineup, listened to each artist beforehand to pick out people I may like to hear, and set out to listen to everyone that I could, from opening bands all the way to the closer, every day. I did not hang out with the group that I went with, I for the most part was by myself to enjoy the music. I stopped drinking from the first day as it was slowing me down, and did not do me any favors powering through the day. My feet hurt so bad, and my throat was killing me. But man did I get a lot in during those 3 days, seeing so many great acts. I milked the opportunity and saw as much acts as I could. There are a few things I would do differently the second time, like not have such a big backpack so I can dance more freely, but honestly I'm not so sure I'd do it again. Yes, it was a very concentrated musical experience, but also the for the amount I paid, I could probably spread out that money into multiple concerts across an entire year. But again, I'm glad I went, to say and know what it is like.

But back to reality, Ashley had a miserable Covid weekend (and made sure I felt sorry about it), and leaving Coachella I, too got Covid. Hard to say where I got it from, but it did hit me that following week, but honestly getting the vaccine shots effected me worse. At this point I think I would just be as exhausted with a sore throat post Coachella, covid or no covid. And thankfully just starting my job, there was minimal impact to work hah.

May - Post-Covid is a whole new swerve on life, one I would have though post-vaccine would be. At this point it really does feel like we are heading to a world that once was. May starts with my parents visiting us, and taking a trip to Yosemite for my first time. Honestly really cool landscape and very unique rock formations. Back home, we take more chances to eat out at restaurants (for now out on the patio, but still a worlds difference that take out). And this also marks the time where we start playing D&D. Having watched actual plays via Dimension 20, we embarked on playing the game ourselves. With a welcoming community at a local game shop, this would be the start of regular D&D sessions throughout the summer

June - Few key points this month. We attend Mia's debut, at a beautiful venue right off the bay water. It's interesting to think back that her sweet 16 we were doing a drive-by celebration with masks outside and no lingering, but here we are out dancing with a large group of people. It's really refreshing we've gotten back to something like that. This also marks the point where internally I had a goal to stay afloat long enough in California to see this birthday, and would mark the point where we can look back and say, keep going or what's next? Still a question to this day, but glad we were able to make the moved to California work for us up to this point. Mid-June we take a quick trip to Los Angeles, for one to watch a live show of D&D with many of our favorite players, as well as catch up with a few old friends who live in the area. And last, we watched Benee in concert, someone who's music was prevalent during the quarantine part of Covid that it felt fitting to see them live in concert

July - Start off the month with Ryan's bachelor party in Vegas. What a rukus of a time. A hot time to go to Vegas, but we were there to catch Summer League, which was a lot of fun albeit quite short. We also went through Meow Wolf which was pretty cool. Boys will be boys, and we did a lot of tomfoolery that weekend. Later in the month Ash and I went back home to go to Sannibel, and old stomping ground, to celebrate my Dad's 70th. This mixed in with some time back home in Miami, it's always nice to get a little injection of home once in a while.

August - ahh, and here we are. after a year and a half of waiting, my Bronco finally arrives. There was large anticipation, followed by months of doubt of getting it for years (I even ordered another car for the interim, and that too was delayed). But yea, kind of crazy to be buying another brand new car, but this felt like the best possible compromise between my wants and needs. We'll soon find that I'll barely get to drive it, but I do my best, taking to roof off when I can, and the first weekend drove down to Monterey to get a set of wheels. The following weekend is Ryan and Katrina's wedding, so mini reunion with old college friends (and would be the kick off of many reunions going into next year). The following week we took a trip to Denver for Ashley's birthday to see one her best friends and her cousin. First time in Denver it was interesting to see all of the little pockets of the city, each having their own kind of architecture. Also cool to be surrounded by mountains. While there I was remote working and dog sitting their 3 dogs. We met up with Ash's cousin, where we met her little kid at the aquarium. I also saw a Bronco Raptor which was pretty exciting for me, too. With our new love of Dungeons and Dragons, we hired a private DM to host a night for us and show Ashley's friend how to play. Before the month ends, a couple more moments: the first time I went into the office in the city. Honestly for me this was a huge deal.

September Hoo boy, this was a good one. For a while we wanted to explore the west coast more, and given the chance now with both of us remote, we wanted to enter the idea of living somewhere for an extended time, so we pulled the trigger and rented a flat in Seattle for a month. This place was right across the street from pike place market for maximum opportunity. Although we had a bit of an adventure securing the right room, we'd finally settle into a great place with enough space and a lot of sunlight coming in. Such a refreshing experience, and Seattle treated us so well with only giving us maybe half a days rain the whole month. Traveling wise we got plenty of chances to explore Pike Place Market, as well as travel further out to other pockets; capitol hill, Ballard farmers market, Bellevue. Events I went to while there included PAX, which was a cool environment to see upcoming games. I also saw Lisa Wallen do comedy in a secret venue (ended up being at a small photo studio). It was nice to meet her afterwards and talk for a minute. I also got to see a cousin and catch up. We even got a session in of D&D. Another big event to cross off my bucket list was got to DirtFish Rally school. One of the coolest driving experiences, it was so much fun to go out there and slide about. After all of the exploration of my driving enthusiasm, I really think sliding around in dirt is the pinnacle of my happiness doing it. I'm so glad I did it, glad I splurged to do the full day, it was definitely worth it. In the end, Seattle was such a dream of a stay. It's on the list of place we could move to, although I like the idea of taking in Seattle one month at a time, I hope we can do it again soon.

October Back in Oakland, but still a few meaningful events. One was Francis' bachelor party in Chicago. My first experience with Chicago was riddled with bad luck, not Chicago's fault, so it was nice to get redemption. It started with a night that went a little too wild, followed by days of recovery doing smaller things. But I did really enjoy the architecture boat tour, Chicago really does have great buildings along the river and lake coast. Besides the first nights jazz club and debauchery club, we also did a game night event which was cool, and while some of the guys went to a movie for Halloween I went to a underground club by myself which was an interesting experience. The other big thing in October was our dating anniversary, where we went to see Panic! At the Disco. While we got pretty decent seats, Ashley entered to win better seats and we won, gaining us access to floor seats right up front which was kind of crazy. While it wasn't the same songs as we loved in college, it was a fun time to be at a big concert.

November Ok so much like Seattle, we spent all of November (and the first week of December) in Florida. Chaotic is a word you can use to describe it, purely on the amount of traveling and seeing all sorts of family and friends. The paint a picture, we switched where we slept a total of 11 times, and that still doesn't capture the couple days where we took day trips. Might just have to list out a few notable pieces: Zachary's 18 spent at Hard Rock, only to eventually find out it was 21+ spent the night with Eddy on the coast to watch the Artemis rocket launch, a project they started developing what Ashley was still at NASA Ivanhoe christmas block party with Ashley's best friend, and really just a rare alignment of the stars to spend the time with them Photoshoot with Kevin/Kim's immediate family, which was nice because we haven't done something like that before, that also transitioned to a trip to Kissimmee, and Thanksgiving at Capitol Grill Ocala to see Ashley's parents, whinwe haven't seen for a while Nana's 80th birthday, which was a big surprise celebration in which a lot of Ashley's family was able to make it out. An really refreshing time and happy to see her family having a good time

December Back int he bay, once again just recovering from the month before, we kept it fairly low key. One notable excursion was to hog island for some fresh oysters, and another random trip to Palace of Fine Arts. for Christmas was spent it with the cuz and fam with dinner. For New years Ashley cooked up a delightful Filipino feast.

And that was it. As always, additional tidbits: A lot of opportunities to drive different cars. The Kia Soul was a quirky cheap car that was fun to have for a week. And the best drive was in the MX 5. Food? The first time I had House of Prime Rib, which I thought about that meal from time to time months later. Introduced to Marion Berry in Portland, especially a Marion Berry cobbler which we had to eat twice before we left. Another notable mention is iPot, a lovely spot for ayce hot pot/ kbbq that brought us joy throughout the year.

These year reviews are extensive. And that's good, my life grants me many adventures, more than I even write and record. I'll likely try to recap after each month, so that the task is less daunting, and perhaps provide better reflection. Currently writing the end of this April 2023, and so I already have insight into the next year. But If I recall, no matter what I think the next year will bring, there will many things, big and small, that will take me for surprise. and I'm ok with that.

To the next!

[doesntseeyourbeauty]

Helloooo again! 👻🤍👻🤍👻🤍 I'm so glad the week is going well for you!

Oh, that seems so fun!!! I think I need to stop being so shy and go to a pride event next year! All those activities seem extremely wonderful! And it's even more wonderful that you feel comfortable enough in a rural area to be doing all that. Here it would be fine, but you know how people are. Unnecessarily mean, and I know it would be weird. Still, I think mentalities are definitely changing and that's so amazing!!! I was talking about it the other day with my mom and I was so happy with how far she's come! Not that she was ever prejudiced against anyone in a big way, but there's those harmful little beliefs that we've grown up with that are in need of being irradicated for good. 🤍🤍🤍🤍

I agree all art is so interesting and I think textile art is sometimes forgotten . Which is very sad. We have an incredible artist that sometimes makes textile work and she's very well known everywhere and I think that's so cool! I love making things! I hope you enjoy what I'll be making for you!!! 😊😝

Oooh that is so INCREDIBLY COOL!!!! I can't believe you got to witness that! It's a hell of a memory, and probably A SUPER WONDERFUL time too at the time. Do you remember it? Was there anything she sang in particular that made you go wow?! 🥰

What's your favourite Halloween themed object(?)?!? I mean, ghosts, witches hats, etc??!

🤍🤍🤍

hiiiiii hun!!!!! it's been a slow week but a good one so far!

it was a lot of fun! my only complaint is how cold it was (i was outside for most of it!) and the fact that there was a covid outbreak after :( thankfully i'm testing negative but a lot of people are testing positive (ah back to school time on the west coast, someone always gets sick). We have a relatively large queer community in my area, but they've become much more vocal and out in the last five years, which i'm incredibly excited about! yeah we were concerned about announcing where pride was located until two weeks before since the Idaho pride shooting and the general violence against the queer communities across the U.S. at the moment. but overall it was great, there were no issues at all and i would call it a success!!!

Agreed! Textile art, especially handmade, is undervalued nowadays with the production of machines to do it instead. It always frustrates me when people get upset at the cost of handmade textiles but they don't take into account the time and effort that goes into handmaking textiles! I spent over a month alone doing my jacket for the eras tour (every weekend in April and May for about 12 hours a day) and while I didn't spend a lot on matierals, the labor alone is the costliest thing! I'm soooooo excited to see what you're making for me when it's ready!!!!!!! <3333

I WAS SOOOOOOOOO EXCITED!!! We didn't know who the opener was going to be and I remember how excited I got when Taylor stepped out with her guitar and band. I was only 9 at the time but it was by far one of my favorite memories of a concert from my childhood! The most notable song from that night for me was our song (which has forever been in my top 3 on debut), which was the last one she sang! Taylor did a meet and greet afterwords but my mom didn't want me to go alone so I didn't get to meet her, but I'm just so thankful I got to see her when she was first starting out, it's something that I really cherish!

okay so it's black cats and bats for me!! I have a black cat and have collected black cat items my entire life so they hold a special place in my heart! i also just love bats and everytime i see a bat item I go "it's freaking bats i love halloween" from vine!

ty for reaching out and getting to know me! i always get so excited when i see your messages!!! <33333

[whoreva]

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[vickikowalewski]

Day 7 - May 29, 2023: Lake Como

I take back my comments about this hostel being a party place. Surprisingly, I’ve seen quite a few families and people my age. The earplugs and eye mask worked like a charm too. I slept through everything.

Well jeez, today was a good but overall confusing day. I’ve now come to learn everything at Lake Como is pure chaos. There’s 3 bus stations and 2 train stations. The ferries, forget about it. Everyone is trying to get the hydroplane fast ferry. There’s only a a few daily and you can’t even book a round-trip ticket. Apparently, it also fills up quickly and can even be overbooked. You cannot reserve it in advance. You must stand in line in the morning you want to catch the fast ferry and hope you can get it. This may involve standing in line for an hour with no such luck, you get the slow ferry 3 hours later (as I heard happened to some people). I decided to go with the buses based on the recommendation from the hostel. But the buses are no less confusing. Bus C30 is supposed to leave from one station but there was a landslide that blocked a road over the past month, so now it’s leaving from another station. Mind you, there’s no signage anywhere about this. You just have to ask around with the locals who speak English and know to go to a different bus station a 20 minute walk away and stand in the line that looks wrong.

As you can tell, I was very turned around and missed the 9am bus so I had to wait for the 10am bus instead to Bellagio. I met a nice digital nomad couple living in Portugal on the bus that I finally got on. They were quite enjoyable to pass the hour with.

I forgot to mention the morning was hellish pure cold rain and 60 degrees. I ended up having to rework my outfit because I would have been freezing in a pair of shorts. Thankfully, luck was on my side. No rain the rest of the day with sun and warmth. Only downside was I didn’t prepare for that much sun.

Well, although the transportation is awful… Lake Como lives up to the hype. It is unbelievably gorgeous. I spent the late morning and early afternoon walking around Bellagio and visiting the Melzi Gardens. Absolutely stunning.

I then decided to catch a ferry to Varrena. That process was also a hot mess. The man at the ticket station was quite rude. There’s also a boat ticket and a ferry ticket. The boat is for pedestrians only and the ferry is for cars and people. Both stations are different in Bellagio so you have to pay attention and the preference should be the boat. Well I came to learn trying to catch the boat, the rules can change on a dime. Don’t even bother with the schedule. My boat direct to Varenna turned into Menaggio and then Varenna. My boat back to Bellagio to catch the bus pushed me into the ferry to Bellagio and the other ferry randomly turned into Menaggio and Como. The lines fill very quickly too and people get left off the boat, and this is the “off season.” I can’t even begin to imagine what happens during the on-season.

It was almost 3pm when I arrived at Varenna and I was quite hungry. Unfortunately, I didn’t realize there’s a siesta hour after 3pm in this region of Italy. One of the only places without a massive line was quite expensive, although the view of the water was quite stunning. I got an Aperol spritz and a Caesar salad. Both were excellent.

By the time I was done, I noticed I was getting sunburn and my phone was dying, but I forgot my iPhone power cord for my power bank. I managed to get some spray on sunscreen SPF and the pharmacist hinted that an iPhone charger was for sale at a tobacco shop. With some mild difficulty because European English isn’t exactly 100% correct, I eventually found it and bought an iPhone power cord for 8 euro.

I started my day late so I didn’t get to see everything in Varenna that I wanted, but I did manage to see Villa Monastero, which was also quite beautiful.

The bus back to Como was chaotic, a bottle of champagne was popped, and a young girl got motion sickness and projectile vomited all over another person’s back shoulder which stunk up the whole bus. Thank goodness there were windows. The smell was rancid. I got a seat but a lot of people got left behind for the next bus in an hour. Apparently, the high speed ferry overbooked so a lot more people than normal were left stranded. We were literally driving past people at other stops because the bus was full.

I ended my night with a late dinner at 9pm in Como. It was absolutely delicious. Pasta with little neck clams and tiramisu. Mind you, this meal was cheaper than my snack in Varenna. I’m off to bed. Goodnight!

[sylvctica]

KNOWING YOUR PARTNER WELL CAN POTENTIALLY MAKE WRITING TOGETHER A LOT EASIER. ( REPOST DO NOT REBLOG ! )

✿ NAME:   aid! what i’m most known as, shorthand for Asuraid which is just my online handle in most places.

✿ PRONOUNS:   she / her!

✿ PREFERENCE OF COMMUNICATION:   mmm, mostly thru tumblr IMs / post replies? obvs discord is the best, but because i’m so low spoons for social energy i am a lot more picky with adding people there. :[

✿ NAME OF MUSE(S):   sylvie and my gaymer boy oc! tho i’m not very active on him, i do still have access to his account.

✿ EXPERIENCE/HOW LONG (MONTHS / YEARS?):   uhh, overall i started roleplaying when i was around 12-13 on devART, moving onto tumblr circa 2013 ( so i was around uh ... 14ish? ). so i’ve been writing on here for almost a decade at this rate LMAO ...

✿ PLATFORMS YOU’VE USED:   skype, discord, tumblr, devART, iphone messages, msn for like one person ... never tried my hand at forums, or rather i did early on and dropped it because the format was odd for me w/multiple people going on at once.

✿ BEST EXPERIENCE:   honestly getting to meet the people i talk to now, esp @afacere since we’ve been at the hip for years now; a lot of Hideki has been influenced by her, and we’ve been each other’s friend support pillars for years. honestly, taking the plunge to bring sylvie to tumblr ( since i had been in a heavy hiatus at that point off hideki ) also counts here.

✿ RP PET PEEVES/DEALBREAKERS:   tiny fonts, tiny themes / docs / carrds ... thankfully it’s not terribly prevalent but sometimes i do come across some of them where you either can’t read the text well because it’s too small, or it’s too blended into the background / too contrasting, so it hurts to look at, or the background is misaligned to the text box because other resolutions werent taken into account and i wanna bite my own arm off because it’s like ... pls. this is what ppl see first and where your primary info is. thankfully, dash view mitigates it for themes, but it makes me take -10 hp of damage.

✿ FLUFF, ANGST OR SMUT:   mmm, i guess fluff? mostly just due to sylvie’s personality, i do tend to lean more into silly light-hearted stuff. angst i do enjoy but it’s harder for me to write just cause i’m slow and for angst i really need to do it in the moment of it happening to feel it. smut ... i dont write on here ueueueue. sylvie does fucc tho.

✿ PLOTS OR MEMES:   memes, mostly because over the years i feel like i’ve lost my brain for generating plots. not that im not up for it!!! im just ... very, very very slow and work off spontaneous stuff better ( and discussing stuff more in depth ooc ). i bounce better off an existing base rather than no base.

✿ LONG OR SHORT REPLIES:   mostly short since im often pretty tired, so dash commentary is pretty prevalent. that’s not to say im not open to long replies!!! i enjoy writing them, they just take a lot of spoons for me the longer they are ... though sometimes stuff unintentionally gets long because sylvie rambles.

✿ BEST TIME TO WRITE:   whenever my brain doesn’t feel like death ... it really is sporadic, though most of my writing time ends up being at night because that’s when it’s the quietest and i’m free ( ... almost, my parents are playing a loudass movie rn even at 1am ). otherwise i do just write when i feel the muse for it.

✿ ARE YOU LIKE YOUR MUSE(S):   to a degree? it’s hard not to put aspects of yourself in an oc, even if subconsciously. sylvie is more-so what i aspire to be in confidence, but we do have some overlap ... especially in our humour. their unfiltered thoughts are my unfiltered thoughts, but i just have a filter to keep them in LMAOOO. we also deviate off topics very easily and ramble about things.