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#that i was taking way too much responsibility for us on myself
conkers-thecosy · 18 hours
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Five Fic Feedback!
Tagged by: No one! Seen this floating about a few fandoms, and decided to bring it over to bagginshield!
Rules: Pick five fics you've written, then tell us about how you feel about it vs how readers have received it!
1 - Bad Blood
My Thoughts: This one is way bigger than I meant it to be! It was going to be about 5k words and the only scene I had in my head was Bilbo biting the elven guard, haha! Readers: People really seem to love this one! I feel like feral Bilbo is always a crowd-pleaser, and this fic got much more attention than I ever expected it to! - 2 - Soldier My Thoughts: I'm really proud of this one. It was my first bagginshield fic, and it was after a loooong break from writing. Even though it's a bit weak in places, I have such a soft spot for it. Readers: I ended up re-posting this one after some harassment kicked my confidence down the toilet, but since then the reception has been very positive! - 3 - Poet My Thoughts: I'm sorry to say it, but this is probably my least favourite fic I've written. If it wasn't so popular I'd have removed it and altered the end of Soldier so it was just one fic! Readers: This fic seems to be very popular, and was the first time someone made art of my work - and more than once! I remember posting the first chapter and not expecting very much, only to come onto tumblr and see random posts where folks were super excited to see it was updating! It was such a lovely feeling! - 4 - My Ego Dies My Thoughts: I genuinely love this one, I think it's probably my personal favourite. I really enjoy playing about with the idea of "forgiveness" between Bilbo and Thorin, and this fic really scratched a particular itch for me! Readers: Probably my least popular fic - statistically, at least! I've found most folk weren't into it for one reason or another, but the people who love it, really, really love it! -
5 - Stealing Moments, Moments Away My Thoughts: I wish I'd taken more time with this one in some ways, but in others it really is the reshirement fic I wanted to tell. Again, I got to tinker with that "forgiveness" trope, and have a good look at what survival might realistically have meant for Thorin. Readers: This one is a quick read, and it's soft and fluffy, so I think readers enjoy it for that reason, though I believe some found it a bit boring. It was being updated almost daily, and the folks who were invested came back to comment and read practically every time I updated, which was just amazing to me! - 6 - Backs To The Wall (Sorry, I've written six, so I wanted to do all of them!) My Thoughts: I wrote this because it was something I wanted to read, and couldn't find. It's been amazingly fun, and I told myself when I started (knowing it was going to be fairly long - even if I didn't realise quite how long at the time, haha) that I wasn't going to take it too seriously, and I was really only writing this for myself, as the most self-indulgent kind of nonsense, ever! Readers: I can't begin to tell you how utterly blown away by the response to this I've been. Like?? It's just crazy to me how much folks are enjoying this, how excited and supportive everyone has been! I've been so grateful for everyone reading, and genuinely shocked down to my bones, haha! 💛 - No pressure tags for: @fantasyinallforms @lucigoo @lordoftherazzles @domesticgoddesswriter @thatfancygirlinwhite @lauramkaye @sass-y-squatch @mintedwitcher (and honestly anyone else who sees this and wants to do it, *waves a wand* you are Tagged!)
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subaquatic0mess · 2 days
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Alenoah Hypnosis AU, where Alejandro offers to hypnotize Noah, Noah says yes but makes sure that Owen + Izzy + Tyler is around to make sure that Alejandro doesn't make him do anything too embarrassing...
But Alejandro only adds a hypnotic trigger... Whenever Alejandro offers Noah a hug, Noah feels a strong urge to cuddle Alejandro... It's Alejandro own way of playfully messing with Noah... Noah hates it (but secretly enjoys the cuddles)... Owen + Izzy + Tyler doesn't stop Alejandro from adding the trigger, cause they think the hugging might help the anti-social grumpy Noah...
NOAH (while hugging Alejandro): "I'll get you for this, you eel..." 🍥
I've induced myself into to much content about this idea already so I'll give you a quick response so that I don't become hella biased or just repeat something someone else might have already said. (Did I say quick? Fuck that, future me had other ideas.)
Something I would like to see is Noah gradually understanding how to suppress the urges of the hypnosis with Owen's help.
By that I don't mean he just randomly stopped being able to be hypnotised or something.
I mean that Noah would realize just hiw much control Alejandro had over him and he realized he couldn't do anything about it.
This then brings Noah to consistently try to explain to Owen how wrong this is and that he needs him to help him to not give in. Yet it wasn't that easy he knew that if that eel even doubted Noah was retaliating he'd most definitely put a stop to it.
So this ends up with Owen confused as he keeps recieveing mixed signals from Noah who seems to switch up almost completely when Alejandro joins the same room. (Noah isn't taking chances.)
So this ends up with Noah practically beggin Owen to pay attention to the next time he gets hypnotised.
This results in Owen seeing his best buddy go from his usual self to someone who wasn't there. The way Noah disassociated scared Owen a bit.
Now Owen would try to understand how he views Alejandro. Alejandro was supposed to be a good guy no? Why does this feel so wrong then?
The moment Noah would regain focus he'd probably be quite alarmed as his chubby buddy is quite literally having a crisis. See what I mean now Owen?
And this would result in the two slowly scheming a way of making sure Noah would be able to control the trigger of his hypnosis.
Owen making sure Noah avoided Alejandro.
Noah trying to concentrate on Owen rather than Alejandro.
Owen trying to distract Alejandro when he saw he was hypnotising Noah breaking his focus midway through. That last one was quite helpful. Hope is not something the cynic feels too often but this is important.
Hope.
Knowing that he can break even if only momentarily from Alejandro's grasp.
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Something I invision would maybe be Noah being able to free himself from his grasp but not emidiatly making it clear for anyone else. Besides Owen.
Like now they have the power over that eel. Ofcoirse this would work for only a little since I feel like after all of what happened Noah would be pissed.
And he isn't one to just express himself. He's too lazy for that.
And since he bottled up his anger I have a feeling there would be a moment where he would just burst?
It's not even about the hugs. Fuck that Noah wasn't even that pissed about that.
He was pissed Alejandro used that to make Noah shut up when he disagreed with him.
He felt as if he took his voice. It made him feel small.
He couldn't take it anymore. So blah blah angst and more heavy angst that I have no clue how to write properly. Srr!!
And then they would probably become quite begrudging of eachother as now things are quite tense.
From Alejandro's pov he didn't see no wrong in what he was doing. Maybe he might've have gone a bit overboard but- Noah allowed him. Did he just make Alejandro a fool of himself in international television?
For everyone to see? For his brother to see? For his parents?
Oh no. He can't bear that.
Did he do the same to Noah?
They're both torn at the moment. This is all my brain ranting srr if it makes no sense.
Credits to this anon, @total-drama-brainrot and they're anons awell for the inspo!
Idk what else to say!!!
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alexa-nowak · 2 days
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One of my old texts from YouTube arguments about Astarion endings
I am not that invested in this discourse nowadays because I lost hope to change anyone's opinion and also, I am simply tired from dealing with toxic bs that I am getting as a response to some of my old comments on YT to this day. My favourites are those who will reply to my every comment to say how delulu I am and I probably just dreaming about being in a toxic relationships myself, while being unable to understand that people have their own ways to heal through art and that throwing poison on people like that is not helpful at all.
I will leave it there and funny enough, I am not even so much of AA fan, I just don't like people being ignorant and rude.
And I like writing essays, so here it is.
So, what this dark romance fantasy is about for me personally,(even though i prefer spawn romance, i absolutely understand the appeal of asc Astarion because honestly, i was all about this kind of romance during my childhood and teenage years, hardocore the Phantom of the Opera girl is here, inside your head 💀), and why it's also healing route for some players,and no, it's not about kinky vampiric banging.
1)A lot of people feel extremely worthless and insecure, lonely, like no one really cares for them at all. It's a very deep wound that hurts and it's difficult to overcome even in perfectly loving, healthy and supportive relationship with a good partner,and even with therapy. So fantasy about a vampire, being obsessed with you so much that he is ready to do absolutely anything just to be with you for forever is really comforting. Also,you don't have to think too much about your imperfections, because for him you like a center of his vampire heart.
Besides, you sympathise with him - it's like a selfcomfort mirror, i love this monster despite everything, so in a way, i accept myself despite any flaws i see in me.
2) Safety. When the world around you feel like a wilderness, full of monsters, it feels like only the most terrifying loving monster can protect you from it. He is powerful and protective, and i am so precious to him, that he will set the world on fire just so i would be safe.
3) Responsibility. As you may see, this kind of relationship have daddy issues vibes and codependency, and in real life, you can't just fully submit safely to anyone, I don't think i have to explain why it's a dangerous idea to seek this kind of relationships in real life. You have to stay a grown up independent person and seek safety for yourself without expecting someone to come and heal all your wounds. But this is fantasy, so finally you can use this as a comfort fantasy with no fear about being taking advantage of, without shame to be called childish and etc.
4) Independence. Spawn ending is very terrifying for anyone who has issues with feeling safe and independent, because some of us prefer violent power fantasies over "we have each other and that's all that matters", second of all, this ending also has some shady co-dependency undertone to it that can be triggering for some people. I love Spawn Astarion a little bit more more than Asc and yet my heart stayed absolutely broken after running away from the sun scene, and i hate that he is so dependent on Tav. Larian owes me some emotional refund after this.
5)SA trauma: it wasn't even seen as a possibility for healing way by writer, but it is for some.Asc Astarion feels like he is the most powerful creature in the world,and he is fully controlling everything that happens between him and Tav,so finally, it's a kind of situation where there is no chance of him being abused again. It's one of the reasons why some people become Doms in BDSM dynamic relationships: finally, full control of the process and a partner, who trusts then enough to fully submit, trust issues is also big deal in Astarion story of healing. I find idea that that only Subs can enjoy Asc Astarion a little bit naive. Because,well, some news for you: Doms like it too because they understand why he is so eager to be a top :D
Unrealistic, not the healthiest way? Probably! But this man and this love is not real anyway.
Yes, i think many of us, especially folks who went through therapy and a lot of self reflecting are already aware that it's basically romanticized version of narcissistic obsession and in real life this is creepy, but it's not real, it's a fantasy. People use BDSM to heal, romance books and all other forms of art to deal with their inner demons and it's absolutely normal. Even if someone is blind to see what is wrong with Asc Astarion, I highly doubt that toxic bucket of shame and aggression are able to help see anyone problematic side of things. Do you know who is usually up to romanticize toxic dynamic in romance? Victims of abuse. In real life, if you just scream and yell at any poor girl/boy/whatever about how stupid they are for believing that their abusive partner really loves them, people will either break down and cry or tell you to f#ck off and they will have every right to do so, but they won't see what's wrong with their partner,in whom quite often victims of abuse see their only source of love and safety in life.
Hells, I am so sick and tired from this "white cloak knight saviour from cycle of abuse" toxic flood in this fandom. If you really want to educate people - do it with extreme care and compassion. Real life healing is not working like it's with Astarion in the game,few right dialogs and boom, dude is on the right path.
It takes enormous amount of patience and love, be kind to one another, and stay safe, darlings. Being toxic on Asc fans you are not helping anyone, you just hitting your superiority complex button in your ass.
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leandra-winchester · 3 days
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So. There's been a lot of speculation, and a lot of hot and lukewarm and some honest and valid takes about the new trailer and the potential of what might go down next ep.
I've been thinking thoughts, and I have my own personal stance on the matter. And no, I will not be 'taking criticism', because this is the way I view things in general, and it won't change. So this isn't me opening up a debate about this, this is just me sharing my personal views, which you absolutely can agree or disagree with. (So if your views on cheating are vastly different from mine, don't come at me telling me how wrong I am, I'm not doing that at you either)
That being said, here are my thoughts and beliefs.
Kissing isn't (automatically) cheating. For me, it highly, highly depends on the accompanying circumstances. There are kisses for shits and giggles that are not cheating. There are kisses happening under heavy influence of whatever substance - something that can render you legally not responsible for a lot of things, so how does it make you responsible for a moment's poor choice? There are kisses that are done deliberately with intention and feelings/high physical attraction involved, and THAT is cheating. When we look at the Buck/Lucy kiss, I didn't see it as huge a deal as many of the fandom did. The kiss itself somewhat fell into the second category. But what made it at the very least borderline cheating was the fact that Buck made a secret of it afterwards. Had he said "Look, something happened last night. I was drunk, then Lucy kissed me, and I didn't instantly pull back, but I didn't want to kiss her again or anything. I have no feelings for her whatsoever and I will watch myself in future a whole lot more to notice any signs of flirting, which, in hindsight, there were. I'm sorry." - then I think that's still grounds for a partner to be mad, sad, disappointed, but it's not really full-on cheating. Not in my book, by my definition.
Emotional cheating is much worse than physical cheating Being in love with someone and knowing it, imagining yourself to be with that other person, THAT is much more cheating by my definition than a fleeting kiss. And sometimes, depending on the circumstances, maybe even more than a drunken fumble or one night stand, but that is a very complex question. However, emotional cheating means you're not really in it with your current partner, pining for someone else but settling for what you can have out of convenience, fear of being left behind or some other highly egoistical motivation. That really sucks. (I've seen that take expressed on my dashboard as well, though with slightly different nuance to what I feel and believe, but pretty close)
So, taking these two of my underlying beliefs as the basis, what can I see happen in the next episode that would leave me feel okay with it, or happy about it, and what would make me feel iffy about it?
Let's start with the iffy.
Buck:
If, at any point in their drunken Hangover-movie escapades Buck and Eddie kiss, full on kiss (with maybe a little bit of tongue), and that kicks something lose in Buck, I would utterly hate that. Not that I wouldn't find it plausible that a kiss like that would trigger him realizing romantic feelings for Eddie, but that it happens now.
Someone else made a long post about negative stereotypes about bisexuals, and I agree. This is the promiscuity/bisexuals can't be trusted to be faithful stereotype, and I don't want Buck to ever be seen in that light.
Also, Buck JUST (and that post mentioned that too) convinced Tommy to come with him to the wedding, that he's ready for something... only to emotionally cheat (because it's that aspect for me rather than the kiss itself) on him the very next opportunity?
"But Tommy and Buck aren't in a relationship yet," I heard someone say, and well, yes. But this isn't REAL LIFE. It's writing. Things are crafted in a certain way to form a story, and stories have a purpose. The narrative gave us an arc where Buck seemingly wasn't ready for a relationship with a man yet, where he fucked up and had to fix that, had to take a leap and take some courage to make it work.
Just purely from a narrative standpoint, it would be so inconsistent to reverse that healthy step forward just one episode later.
From what we know about the episode, it also doesn't look like he's breaking up with Tommy in that episode. A lovely, potentially dramatic moment where Buck kisses Tommy in front of everyone as a means of 'coming out' is highly implied/likely. So that would mean him being aware of some feelings towards Eddie and still going through with that. And yeah. No. I'd really, really fucking hate that.
Eddie:
If they kiss at some point and it kicks something loose in Eddie, and he then goes back to Marisol... I'd have much less of a problem with that because it could still be explained and justified with him just being in utter panic about coming out. It would match the catholic guilt arc, and all his previous attempts at conforming to heteronormativity... BUT, if the relationship just continued as is and he'd actively use her as beard that would be shitty, even for poor confused, repressed, closeted Eddie.
The Not Iffy
On with Eddie:
If that kiss brings something to the surface in Eddie and he then breaks up with Marisol one episode later I would not consider that cheating or poor morals or anything of the sort. He wasn't aware of it until that moment, and as soon as he is aware of it and has had a little bit of time to process it, he draws the right consequences from it and breaks off a relationship he's not fully in.
So this would actually be fine to me. This could be the kick starter for a potentially long and complex arc for Eddie to a) come to terms with his sexuality and b) pine for Buck from a distance, because Buck is with Tommy and c) eventually, when the time is right, for Buddie to go canon.
Buck:
The kiss itself wasn't a serious or real kiss. I'd be okay with it, if it was some silly, exaggerated "MWAH" smack of the lips kiss, prompted by someone or something around them - I dunno, maybe one of the women there saying "Aww you're such a cute couple" and they going in for it just for shits and giggles; or Buck gushing about Tommy and what a great kisser he is and Eddie drunkenly, outwardly jokingly saying "Hey, I'm a great kisser too!" and them jokingly leaning in for a smooch, again, for shits and giggles.
Buck afterwards doesn't even remember it because it meant nothing in that moment, and so he's neither seriously physically nor emotionally cheating on Tommy in the slightest.
"But Buck has deep feelings for Eddie. How can he kiss him and not realize them?"
Well, see, Buck has been around Eddie for almost 6 years now and not realized them. They are so, so far past that getting to know and falling in love phase that it makes it a bazillion times more complicated to distinguish those deep platonic feelings from deep romantic feelings (because, what it comes down to in both instances is a deep bond; the bond of love you feel after years of dating isn't that different from a deep platonic bond. Again, Eros vs. Pragma and all that).
But Buck is *in love* with Tommy, he's just entered that exciting, chemically turbulent process of falling in love with someone which, with all the newly formed neural connections and all those hormones overrides anything else that has long since been present and is only now presented with the opportunity to take on a new nuance. Of course he doesn't get it, and he likely won't get it until much, much later, when he's falling out of love with Tommy again for whatever reason, or they break up amicably for whatever reason.
And THIS again is something that could easily go into the iffy, because I would really fucking HATE the implication that Buck needs to break up with Tommy to be with his One True Love. I don't want this to be a difficult and painful choice.
IF (when) Buddie goes canon, I want them both to be ready and free for it and not accidentally pushed towards it, or struggle with a guilty conscience for it, or hurt someone else about it. (Marisol wouldn't count in that context as Eddie would have broken up with her months ago and gone on his own long self-discovery trip).
So yes, even if for slightly different reasons, and even if my views on what constitutes 'cheating' may differ from a lot of yours, I agree that any actual MUTUAL feelings realization right now, under these external circumstances, would totally tarnish the beginning of the Buddie relationship.
Which also makes me hopeful it won't happen in such a way. Up until now, the writing has been extremely solid, and Buck's coming out arc has been done with so much care. I doubt they'd do something that ruins it. (But I'm not 100% sure of it either).
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My mom just sent a message to the family group chat suggesting that my siblings download the 'For the Strength of Youth' magazine on their Gospel Library app and talked about how much the youth magazines helped her testimony growing up and like, cool. Fine. Don't know why the 'sending random spiritual thoughts in the gc' thing started out of nowhere when it hadn't been a thing for a decade but this is just another one of those, and you're ofc allowed to talk about things that are significant in your life.
I don't think sending the 'What I Did When Someone Close to Me Challenged My Faith' article right afterwards was strictly necessary though 🙃
#hi bg mutuals 👋 i'm gonna vent about this from time to time. if any mutuals dont want to see it block the 'apostake' tag#trying not to read too much into it b/c I think I did last time something like this happened#and i dont want to make an ass of myself even if neither time would actually be in front of my parents#but like...i know that they know that one of my sisters is clearly PIMO#they went through her phone a couple weeks ago and i have no idea if they read my texts w/ her#but if they did they probably saw the conversation i had with her about some of the really common shelf-breakers#and telling her to take looking into it at her own pace b/c it's scary and overwhelming#(a conversation SHE started btw)#and when i talked to my parents about the larger context of that whole situation i talked about not having space to step back#and their response was that they give plenty of space b/c they dont make her go to seminary???#that's not the same thing as letting her openly question & potentially leave the church idk what to tell you#like. besties i dont know for sure what caused it (which is NOT making things better. it just feels potentially passive aggressive)#but from my end? it sure looks like it might be a reaction to that. probably not JUST that (friends exist) but.#if you think I'm whispering anti-mormon rhetoric into my siblings' ears just ask me. i'm very much NOT doing that#i'm just. talking? to them? when and if they come to me with questions?#and not making my answer 'well there's a reason our parents raised us in the church! ☺️'#(an actual argument given in the article my mom sent)#hate it. thanks#apostake#jay rambles#ok to interact#im not challenging anyone's faith. my patience though? INCREDIBLY challenged#gotta figure out how to work my way around a 'hey please dont send spiritual thoughts to the gc *I'm in*' talk tactfully#they've been pretty chill about me leaving over-all?? at least to my face#haven't pushed me to go to church w/ them; was fine with me not visiting for easter; didnt try to convince me to not drink coffee; etc#it's just. frustrating that they're not giving my siblings that still live with them that same grace#my sister's 17 ffs#it's very possible im way overreacting to the article. but what is tumblr for if not screaming into the void#religion#mormonism
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munch-mumbles · 1 month
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ive been a little upset about it all night so i need to write out all the things that happened at work today and are bugging me so i can TRY to get it out of my head and actually RELAX bc i just keep pacing in circles around it instead of just accepting it and moving on
#for context i was working frying chicken today. ok so i arrive and literally all the chicken out expires within ten minutes of each other#meanwhile to remake everything takes about an hour 20#tried my best to get everything out and replaced and make sure i have enough of everything and then take my break bc with chicken there are#few narrow windows to take your break in you have very little control over when it is#get back and while im getting ready for my next fry one of the assistant leaders comes back and passive aggressively asks 'everything ok?'#and when i say yeah shes starts saying how shes 'just checking' because apparently i didnt have enough chicken out for her liking and went#on about how we're in a chicken drive (I KNOW. I WORK CHICKEN SHE NEVER HAS.)#etc etc. i just say ok and she leaves#like 20 minutes later she comes fucking back to rag on me again about how i need to choose my break times better and i need to have more#chicken out there as back up (extremely difficult bc there is literally only so much room in the fryers. the batches i usually make already#nearly completely fill them up) blah blah and then when i try to explain how i WAS making pretty big batches people are just snatching them#up fast she keeps trying to walk out the door right away and keeps stopping and looking over her shoulder to just stare at me while i try t#finish my sentence#and she just. doesnt say anything in response when i do finish she just leaves#so clearly she didnt want a conversation she just wanted to rag on me#then later for cleanup the timing of everything just kept lining up inconveniently so i kept having to get in and out of raw cleaning gear#and slowing myself down and i end up having to stay almost 15 minutes late to finish cleaning#during cleaning i have to go grab a key to the back door to take out my trash and this one coworker i have was standing in the way of the#door. i say excuse me and she just stares at me and goes huh?#and i say i need a key and she barely moves out of the way without responding and she has a look like im bothering her#why are you acting like im being douchey. i just need a key. thats something she does a lot she acts like im inconveniencing her by asking#basic favors . ive stopped asking her to help me open the back door (sometimes needed if i also have raw garbage to take out and therefore#cant touch the key myself) for some reason she takes it upon herself to almost completely close the door after i walk out so when i come#back i have to awkwardly use my foot to reach around and pull the door open#ive asked her before not to do it and she just ignored me#GRAH GRAH. and then like i said in my last rb i realized while i was drivign home i forgot to wash a damn pan#im mostly worried about it because ive forgotten a couple times in the past too . in my defense its a pan i personally dont use but it just#gets left behind from first shift sometimes and then second shifters end up having to make sure its clean#im just irritateddd and im mad im worried about it all. its all little things piling up on each other#LOL I WROTE A LOT MORE BUT THE REST GOT CUT OUT IG I HIT A TAG LIMIT. tumblr voice ok dude quit your bitching !!
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one thing abt being disabled/chronically ill that some people don’t get is that sometimes body maintenance that ensures you have the absolute minimum amount of function can also be something that takes away a lot of control and autonomy. you can argue till the cows come home that making those decisions to try and help yourself (or realistically to try to make sure things aren’t worse than they already are) is something that exhibits control and autonomy and stuff, but they can be so limiting in practice because they’re things that take up so much time but have to be done to do anything else
#i have to sleep a lot. i’m at the point where functioning requires 8 hours of sleep if not more#I should probably be getting 10+ but i’m a student and i work so 8 is the minimum. but then also getting ready for bed is a whole process s#the whole thing can take 10-12 hours depending how much im sleeping. just to make sure i can do anything#that is time in my day i cannot use for anything else. it’s not ‘oh but i can push through it’ because i can’t without spending the next da#lightheaded and nauseous and vaguely dizzy and with such intense brain fog I can’t think with my fatigue so bad i genuinely don’t know how#get myself to work a lot of days. my abled peers don’t have to deal with this at all. they have unlimited study time if they want to#and yeah it is a choice i’m making that’s true i could just not do. except i would lose my job and fail out of college because i would not#be able to get to classes or do my homework or think. but being told ‘but you are making choices about your life’ when i have lost so much#of what i used to be able to do because i am spiralling down and continuing to get worse is so.#literally last year i would wake up at 6:30 and then go to school till 3 and then go to my internship until 10 and get home at 11 and be in#bed anywhere from midnight to two in the morning and then wake up the next day and do it all again. i graduated with a 3.9 gpa and made it#into my top college while dealing with my cancer symptoms and then the two surgeries about it#but now i lose half my day to just making sure i can get out of bed. i can’t go anywhere because my body is physically too exhausted#any extra time goes into doing homework or occasionally time to myself#not decimating my health by doing minimum body care responsibilities isn’t freeing. occasionally i have a good day which is freeing but tha#usually goes into just. other things outside class or work or eating. I don’t go do something for myself or go do something fun on good day#because I still can’t. good days just mean i don’t want to lie down on the pavement when i’m going somewhere#I just. I don’t magically have control over my life because i try to get enough sleep. i lose half my day to doing that and ultimately it’s#just a bodily function that would have to happen anyway#this is a vent post im just having a really hard time right now because it feels like im in exponential decline. it was nowhere near this#bad last semester. my grades are tanking and i have no free time because anything outside of sleep is either work or school#vent tw#yall can rb this just ignore my tags completely#disability#chronically ill#i keep trying to explain to people how pots works because that’s all logical but there’s no way to explain what it’s doing to my body or ho#i feel all the time. the last time i felt this bad was when i had a bad flu or immediately after surgeries because i don’t react well to#anesthesia and always come out of them feeling like shit. and now i just feel like this all the time and it’s only getting worse#I can’t even stay up late anymore because my body feels like it isn’t counting the sleep even if I get 8 hours#I can deal if I have a free day the day after but that just leaves Friday and Saturday nights and I usually still have to do homework
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xoxoemynn · 2 years
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Pro tip: if you ever suffer any kind of personal/medical/family/whatever emergency and your place of employment’s response is anything other than “please take all the time you need, let us know if you need anything, we’re thinking of you,” start applying to other jobs asap because you deserve better.
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the-cooler-king · 3 months
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The thought of explaining to my mom at some point that I'm moving in with this guy I met at work (that I don't talk to her about because.... wait for it) because her immediate reaction will be that we're fucking, dating, whatever and that I'm stupid to do this (like she did) and I'm especially worried about the moment she discover he has kids because she has always maintained I am "confused" and that I would end up with a man and be normal. What a thought to get out. That's probably why I have a headache
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screampied · 21 days
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‘ DARLIN’ CAN I BE YOUR FAVORITE ? ,
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ᡴꪫ‎ sum. if you knew you’d be sandwiched between two of your dad’s colleagues, you’d—actually let’s not finish that sentence. turns out you get walked in on by shiu kong, toji’s best friend who’s also your ex boyfriend. awkward…
wc. 6.5k
warnings. fem! reader, toji & shiu kong, threeśome, age gap + (reader's over twenty), unprotected, shiu walks in on you and toji, size kink, cowgirl dp, sucking toji's nipples, praise, degradation, shotgunning, double penn, overstim, spit, squírting, spanking, face-fucking, cunnìllingus.
dbf! toji masterlist.
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oh, everything felt like a fever dream…
one of those dreams that was so good that you just never wanted to wake up from—yeah, those ones. it’s been quite some time since your little fling with your father’s best friend took off, as if you’d even call it a 'fling' anymore. perhaps you were getting a bit too attached. maybe he was too, the both of you ended up screwing around literally any chance you got. so secretive, you’d almost gotten caught when your panties were found that one time. thankfully, toji came up with some bullshit excuse that was surprisingly believed. 
he had a single taste of you, just a taste and he was whipped. addicted just like that. it was a sunday evening, pretty quiet and you were currently drying yourself off from the shower. toji came out right after you, and he lifted you, pressing a sweet wet kiss near the corner of your lips. “mhm. how much time do we have, baby?”
“like an hour,” you’d mumble, your legs swiftly locking around his slim waist. toji’s kisses were always so sloppy and rough, a faint touch of passion trodding underneath before his hand found its way near your ass again. a towel wrapped around his waist, another wrapped around your torso, so wet. “i think he’s still out.”
“so i have ya all to myself again,” he rasps, leading you towards the bed, his warm lips coat a plethora of steamy kisses all down your collarbone before placing you down. “perfect.”
although, perhaps it wasn’t as perfect as toji initially thought. because who knew you’d get walked in on—again? not by your father thankfully, but shiu kong, toji’s long-time best friend, and no one other than your one and only ex-boyfriend.
shit.
you moan, feeling him lie you back down towards the mattress. toji stares at you, such an appetizing stare. he was feral, feral for you.
the two of you had been going at it for hours just moments ago in the shower—yet he wasn’t exactly finished with you. toji had stamina equivalent to a hefty stallion, he showed no signs of fatigue whatsoever.
your eyes peer at his body, his perfectly sculpted hardened pecs— he was a statue, his entire frame had you soaked. momentarily, he then starts to slowly peel your towel off. he’s slow, basking in your beauty, seeing your body was a sight he doesn’t think he’d ever get used to.
“damn. look at this perfect fuckin’ body,” he huffs out, taking in every sight of you. every curve, every angle . .
you felt your heart throb for a moment before he leans in to plant a multitude of chaste kisses near your tummy. toji then lolls his tongue out briefly, creating a wet trail to lick way down between your legs. “messy girl. ‘s still running down y’er thighs.”
“clean it off me then.” you’d tease him, parting your legs ever further for him. 
toji tsks, kissing his teeth before brushing a thumb between the slit of your folds. so damp, so swollen . . . swollen just from a few moments ago.
you watch as he gets on the bed, it sinks down a tad bit from his weight — a springing noise commences in the process. he decides to be a mere tease and blows against your pussy. near the very entrance part. the moment he watches you twitch as a response, he snickers. “ooooh. someone’s eager. look at how ya respond from just a little blow, baby.”
“t …. toji,” you’d choke out, grabbing onto the ruffled slightly wet strands of his hair. “hurry up ‘n just finish.”
“nah. girl. what i tell ya ‘bout rushing me?” he grouses, and his abrupt switch of attitude made you throb.
you whimper once you watch him graze a thumb down your sopping cunt. your body was still immensely wet from the shower, he brings a single kiss towards your folds before lapping up the remnants of your syrupy flavor. “now shut the fuck up ‘n let me enjoy my meal—”
the entire atmosphere gets indecorously ruined once your door opens, and the familiar person standing there is the last person you’d expect to meet eyes with.
“…….oh my,” a low rasp escapes from his mouth, and you sit up as well as does toji. there stood shiu kong, in nothing but his usual attractive business attire. his hands were deeply buried into the fronts of his pockets, and a typical lit cigarette stuck out of his mouth. “fushigurooo?”
“… shiu?” you’d mutter, and toji glances at you. 
“psh. don’t tell me you two know each other,” toji dramatically rolls his eyes, getting up to close your sprawled out legs for him. your mouth suddenly felt dry and shiu stares at you with the most blank, unreadable expression.
you awkwardly squeeze your thighs together. “uh, sorta.”
“sorta…? sorta?” shiu replies, and he’s amused. you lowly grumble to yourself, finding this entire situation crazily awkward. better yet, how’d he even—you had too many unanswered questions. “aw. now doll, don’t try ‘ta be all smug in front of this cheap bastard. she means to say, we used to be a thing.”
toji grows quiet before, clicking his tongue out of sheer annoyance before scoffing. “you’re joking.”
the entire room felt so hot, you had the most dumbest expression on your face the entire time.
talk about timing . . seems like the universe was never on your side.
your ex-boyfriend and the guy you were currently messing around with in the same room? only to discover that they had history also. talk about a small fucking world. you clear your throat, shielding your body with a cover before mutterng. “...shiu, why are you—”
“did ya forget, doll? i’m your dad’s handler,” shiu says with a mere bland tone. he shifts his weight before pulling his hands out his pockets. his posture was straight and he fixes his collar. the band of his watch glimmers in the light, so flashy.
god, he was so sexy…
forevermore with a cigarette sticking between his pink lips, his gaze that he gave you was so intimate. hooded eyes that you always got lost in, you could never forget shiu. “told your father i had to use the men’s room, only to find out you’re getting all nasty for this bum,” and then he smirks. “woah. toji you grew two inches.”
you were smart enough to know shiu was talking about toji’s height..
“…doll,” toji repeats with a mocking sneer, ignoring his little comment.
perhaps you were a bit delusional, but judging from toji’s tone he sounds… jealous? “still can’t believe you dated this guy,” he yawns, sitting up to strech before glancing at you. “who’s better in bed?”
“...huh?” you murmur, not expecting a question as such as that. again, the entire room felt thick of hot tensed air. you squeezed your thighs shut before realizing both of them were giving you the same intrigued stare. they favored each other if you squinted.
mayhaps your type was quite obvious. older guys with dark hair, tall and buff … the list continues to go on and on. “um, probably—”
“girl, don’t answer that.” toji grumbles, immediately cutting you off from speaking any further. 
shiu snickers, making himself comfortable by sitting between the both of you. “awh. mad that she was gonna say me, toji toji?”
“call me that again ‘n you’ll be six feet under, shiu.” he stares at him, and you nearly gasp once you feel toji softly place his hand down near your thigh. his touch . . . it never failed to make you practically weak in the knees. 
you feel yourself growing more hot the more toji gingerly skims a thum between your squeezed thighs before you speak, “so you two know each other?”
“yeahh, we fuck on the low.” shiu shrugs, and that makes the tips of toji’s ears boil. the difference between toji and shiu was somewhat cute yet humorous. toji was more laid back and stern whilst shiu was more playful and perhaps even a little dominant. “toji would never admit it though.”
“…..we’re just close friends,” toji bleats, and a near cute pout tugs on his lips. he’s still holding onto your thigh, yet it starts to go higher and you had to restrain yourself from moaning. “he works for me too or whatever,” and that’s when toji leans in close to you, scudding a thumb near your chin. “enough about him though.”
firmly, toji grips your chin before closing the remaining distance with a kiss. a rough kiss. you already lost whatever composure you had left, moaning right into his mouth the moment his lips mashed against yours. minty, he always had such a sweet candied flavor to him.
toji groans himself, feeling your tongue swiftly glide against his, giving it a brief suck.
the way you were somehwat of a . . . sloppy kisser so to speak, he always found it so cute. you breathe through your nose, warm jagged breaths colliding amongst each other before suddenly you’re pulled away abruptly. 
your peripherals spot shiu lingering near the corner of you. you turn while he holds your chin now, removing his cigarette before whispering in a low, “mmm. may i get a taste too, doll?”
“y—yes,” you mutter immensely, and you don’t even realize how fast you said it before shiu swipes a thumb against your bottom lip. so shiny, he’s missed your lips—he remembers how you taste, it was saved all the way in the back of his mind. he stares at you for a long while, a quite stern yet relaxed expression.
“now now, open that mouth for me,” he whispers, and you listen without even questioning. “just like that, goooood girl . .”
toji watches the two of you. he’s got the biggest scowl on his face and its adorable.
it’s not like you two were a thing or anything, but he wasn’t fond of sharing his new favorite girl.
once you part your spit-glossed lips, shiu blows a nice amount of smoke into your mouth. a decent sum of smoke. you moan, wanting him to kiss you and after long seconds later, he finally does. shiu’s kisses were more sincere and passionate. it was as if he was waiting to kiss you again for ages, it felt natural. you couldn’t lie to yourself, you missed shiu . . a lot more than you wanted to admit probably. nothing relatively bad caused the two of you to break up. the two of you just separate and decided to be just friends, but did friends kiss the way you and him were doing? 
probably… not.
a concoction of your own saliva concisely mixes with his, and you can still taste the rough scented smoke on his tongue. you feel yourself throb, grazing your tongue near his before toji pulls you off.
“okay that’s enough,” toji growls, and then you watch as he wipes your lips. you could tell he wanted more of you, and not like toji would ever admit it, but . . seeing you kiss shiu turned him on a little. “tell me,” he says, and his thumb runs across near your chin. he was so close to your lips, nearly inches apart from kissing you again. “who do you want more? me or that idiot?”
you keek at the two of them, both exchanging the same lust filled gaze before you hum, merely out of breath. “i— i want both..”
“greedy girl,” shiu snickers, moving a few strands of hair away from your face. shiu’s right beside you before he makes you sit right on his lap. you hear toji grumble before he starts to peel the cover that was shielding the top half of your body off. “i bet you’re still a mess from toji, huh,” and he gently reaches in between your legs to rub against your slick entrance. you moan, feeling shiu drag two fingers inside. he feels the residuum of toji’s cum that filled you to the brim, merely leaking all out before he chortles. “my, what a dirty girl. how’s it feel when i do . . this?”
you mewl out another whimper, feeling him curl his fingers further inside before shiu runs it against your swollen slit. “g—good,” and then you stare at toji who’s got the cutest jealous scowl. “toji . . kiss me.”
“don’t fuckin’ tell me what to do,” toji carps, and he cups your face, kissing you anyway. you lean into his embrace, and that’s when you feel shiu’s knee propped up right underneath you—right between your precious thighs.
you moan, your body moving rhythmically before sooner than you knew it, you were riding shiu’s thigh, you hear shiu cackle, a hand teasingly sliding up your frame. he bounces his thigh and a tiny squeal leaves past your lips as toji’s tongue roughly swipes against yours. you felt so hot, being felt by two men—two men that wanted you just as bad as you wanted them. the friction, it had you whimpering all inside toji’s mouth, you couldn’t stay still and they both found it adorable.
“so eager,” shiu murmurs, a hand squeezing against your hip. his roughly textured fingers always felt soft on you, you remembered his touch like it never left your body.
(mainly because it didn’t, it never did…)
you were still a bit damp from your shower, nearly dried off when shiu leans in to kiss near your neck. “toji doesn’t deserve a pretty girl like you,” he whispers, taking a fleeting pause between each pull away he makes. “jus’ look at how y’er riding my thigh right now, doll. you missed this, missed me.”
toji turns your head to focus strictly on him now, deepening the passionate kiss before he bites gingerly near your bottom lip. you moan, your arms slinging around his neck before he eventually breaks away.
“shut up, shiu,” he scoffs before a hand trails down towards your ass, he gives it a firm squeeze before spanking it. “you want both of us, princess? ‘n look at me when you answer.”
the entire room felt clouded with heat — the tension, you could feel it from a mile away. you were pulsing, yet you were most likely sure it wasn’t your heart but instead right between your legs. you stare into toji’s eyes, murmuring out a sweet, “yes, i want you both,” and toji’s thumb continues to run against your lower lip. he teasingly pulls it down, darkened eyes flickering towards your mouth before you moan. “please...”
“such good manners for a good girl,” shiu utters, and he continues to twitch his thigh against your legs. you were still insanely sensitive thanks to toji earlier, feeling his hand rub right near the inner part of your thigh. the way his pants against your leg creates so much friction, you started to spasm—it was that easy. “i bet i can make you finish quicker than toji ever could.”
“oh please. is that a challenge?” toji gruffs, and he suddenly makes you lie flat on your back.
you swore things like this only happened in the movies—being shared between two hot men, coincidentally enough, you had some sort of history with the both of them. more-so shiu, toji was just a mere fling, nothing more . . or was it? “don’t get so cocky. i last longer than you anyways.”
“yeah? and how would you know?” shiu snickers, placing his cigarette back between his lips.
“ . . . . ”
their banter was so annoying yet it was practically laughable. you eye as they both sat over you, shiu makes you suddenly sit up before you’re laid flat on all fours. your palms dig into the silk cushioned sheets and toji’s right in front of you. “pretty girl,” he huffs out in a rough voice, grabbing ahold of your chin. “stick out that tongue ‘n say ah for me, baby.”
you comply with ease, slowly rolling out your tongue and toji groans.
always so obedient, you watch as he removes his own shower towel before being met with his hefty shaft. you could never get used to the sight, despite how feral he had you just moments ago.
“y’er pretty but you’d look even prettier with this bratty mouth stuffed all full,” he grumbles through gritted teeth. you moan, feeling as toji rubs and smears his fat tip against your lips. he then smacks against your tongue and you moan, oh so desperate for him to hurry. the way your tongue tried to sneak a lick but couldn’t due to the movements, cute…
toji’s tip was dashingly pretty, swollen with a pearly pink tip. he had a few specks of black hair near his base, the carpet most certainly matched the drapes. your tongue strums against the head before he grips a handful of your hair strands. a brief yank that makes you slightly jolt forward earns a sweetened moans from you.
“toji’s made such a mess out of you, huh,” shiu says from behind you, and you gasp once you feel him bring a kiss towards your ass. his kisses were sweet and gentle, he brings a single sharp spank to your ass simply to watch the recoil jitter right before his eyes and he grins. “mhm. missed this ass. look at how happy she is to see me again.”
your back arch you had going on was immaculate, hands propped into the fat sheets of the bed—your eyes remained focused on toji the entire time, slowly but surely lapping up the remaining sprinkles of pre that coat his tip near his frenulum. his most weak spot…
you made sure to take your time, purely savoring his sweet yet bitter taste. he groans, pulling your head forward just a second before you whine once you feel shiu’s tongue run against your soaked entrance.
“aw. toji got ya all soaked already? damn shame,” shiu grits, and your eyes suddenly droop out of pure pleasure the moment he delves his tongue right between your slit. you couldn’t lie, you missed his long tongue—so long, it reached many many places.
his technique was always killer, a bit different than toji. he preferred eating you from the back, the tip of his hooked nose prods everywhere, getting damper and damper in the process. he removes his cigarette of course before he dives in, and you could barely concentrate. you couldn’t process anything in that small brain of yours. it was merely impossible.
“eyes up here, girl,” toji reminds you in a rough pitched voice, bringing your head to face him once more. you felt the sensation brew and brew, nerves forevermore pulsing through your veins. your mouth was full, toji’s cock was so fat that strands of your own spit starts to seep out near the corners of your lips. pouring down like a waterfall, you were a drenched mess.
and he loved it.
“oh fuckin’ shit, how ‘bout that? y’er drooling for me,” he scoffs, bringing a thumb to wipe it all away. “such a mess,” and then he slowly thrusts his hips into your mouth, making you cling onto his beefy thighs. “such . . a . . fuckin’ . . messsss,” he’d coo gruffly between thrusts. you could savor his taste forever, such thick balls reaching to the very back of your throat. “how’s it taste. the meal okay?”
it was a mere joke, he knew you couldn’t physically reply due to your throat being blocked with such bulky inches of dick, but you nod.
“yeah? yeah. best meal you’ve ever fuckin’ had. don’t forget it.”
you whine, feeling shiu’s tongue resume against your clit. he knew just where to go, to pivot and slither his tongue past all the right spots. he’s always been a sloppy eater, occasionally breaking away to spit right onto your swollen folds. it was his favorite part. spitting on your cunt only to clean it up happily with his tongue.
“she’s so pretty,” he sighs, and then that’s when he blows on your pussy—straight on it. your eyes start to roll back, it was dramatic, really…
“get her niiiiice ‘n wet. i know toji always fails at that part,” shiu jibes, and that earns a vexed glare from toji. you tremble within him, his tongue being practically no match for you. you part your lips, nearly gagging once toji reaches way past near the roof of your mouth. “ooooh. that spot, baby?” he purrs in a seductive voice, watching his own spit trickle right in between your puffed folds. it was a sight to witness, glistening spit making your entire clit sheeny.
“she’s gonna cum, shiu,” toji groans, basically guiding your head by this point. you bobble back and forth, back and forth, a hand then wrapping around his erect shaft. your thumb skims against the few veins that coat near his dick, and you continue to moan out sweet muffled whimpers. so close, you could nearly taste your candied orgasm approaching.
shiu hums, two rough hands spreading your ass a bit further before he starts to create loooong sloppy sucks.
by that point, you were just near the edge. he was so good, you felt your nipples start to perk and tense—you whine, still taking toji into your mouth before you watch toji start to moan louder too. the both of you were approaching quickly, he huffs out a single breath before giving you a single head pat. “make me cum girl, fuckin’ do it.”
you blink thrice, feeling your eyes become watery for a brief moment. gradually, you swipe your tongue against his tip before sinking deeper down. your throat was so compatible, compatible with his inches. so much saliva ran down the sides of your mouth and down your chest. he had to keep wiping it like a true gentlemen.
gentleman was… a word.
waves started to grow, rising and rising. the build up of it all was purely exultant, euphoric even…
for the both of you, it felt so hypnotizing. equivalent to a tsunami about to create total havoc, he felt the ache in his thighs subside before building back up again. your maw lowers just a tad bit. and toji groans lowly, making your head go back and forth until he heard those sweet gagging sounds once more.
he was really that big, you always wonder how he even fit inside your mouth sometimes—he always made it for though…. just for you.
his favorite girl.
the moment toji cums, it’s so much.
it comes out in warm spurts. ropes and ropes galore.
your tongue catches it all, making sure to not miss a single drop. it tasted sweetly bitter, sugary but bitter. he shakes a bit, a hand still tightly grabbing onto the crown of your head as he finishes down your throat. whenever he came, he came a lot. toji never failed to leave your throat full, loaded with such velvety ropes of his honeyed flavor. “s-shittt,” he’d pant, feeling his chest tighten. hearing toji stutter was always cute, the swear that left past his lips sounded so enchanting. he swallows, and whilst he pulls out his now flaccid length, he grumbles. “stick that shit out for me.”
you loll out your tongue yet again, showing him that you proudly swallowed it all and he wipes a few beads from his forehead, feeling at such a high, “….phew girl.”
you end up finishing shortly afterward, your body jerking against shiu’s tongue. it felt so intense, you shook violently, legs shaking—contractions arising everywhere. his tongue slows down, still against your clit before the endorphins that ran through your body waves and roams all throughout. you bit your lip, finally coming undone and your moan was so pitchy and loud.
“forgot how noisy ya usually get,” shiu remarks, and you felt yourself still profusely throbbing. you swipe a tongue over your lips before moaning. once shiu gifts your ass with a final mean spank, it’s so rough. “awh,” and then he shifts his gaze towards toji—a very flustered-and-out-of-breath toji. “look at toji babygirl. ‘s all speechless. is he usually like this?”
“n—no,” you spat, intaking a sharp breath before sitting upright. your entire body still felt warm, tingles running all over before you stare at toji yourself.
he glares at the two of you, suddenly feeling cornered before sternly.
“shut the fuck up. ‘m not flustered,” and then he grabs ahold of your arm. softly, he pulls you into his chest before he falls back. “any-fuckin’-way,”we’re not finished here, little girl. we haven’t even gotten to the best part,” and you watch as he gives himself a few concise strokes. he was surprisingly hard a bit, despite his previous release. “shiu, get over here.”
“ah, so demanding,” he sneers. with glossy eyes, you reach for shiu’s black long slacks, giving it a cute tug. he hums out in sheer amusement, watching your fingers unzip near the fly of his pants and you could make out the bulge that was eagerly presenting itself. he moves closer, closing the distance between the two of you before toji briefly lifts you up. “oh i see,” he whispers, and then you feel shiu’s hands softly graze against your waist. “doll, can you handle both of us inside?”
“y— yes,” you quickly reply, throwing your arms over toji. he snickers at you, that same scar that runs across his lip contorting each time his facial structure twitches. again, this entire thing—this entire scenario, it felt like a dream. a fever dream.
a fever dream, you never wanted to wake up.
not now, not ever.
“yeahhh? let’s see,” shiu breathes, and he gingerly brings his hands towards your hips.
thumbs of his gently presses into your skin before he picks you up. by now, you’re hovering over toji’s angry tip. toji leans back, all manspread with that annoying sly grin. he’s waiting, awaiting patiently. he was never a patient man, but for you, maybe that could have been changed.
you moan, slowly but gradually sinking down onto toji’s thick length.
the sounds your cunt made upon impact was so lewd, salacious squelch after squelch—it ringed into your ears, so tediously repetitive. as you got lowered down onto toji, you wriggle your hips a bit, grinding forward and he grunts. “don’t fuckin’ do that,” he mutters, spanking you. “stay the fuck still.”
shiu gazes from afar, and that’s when he whips out his own hardened shaft — he breathes, smothering his glossed lips together before preparing to go inside of you too. into somewhere where it wasn’t so occupied, you let off a soft whimper once he inserts himself, real slow.
you were a ticking time bomb, gnawing down on your lip as you started to feel madly stuffed. you’ve felt stuffed by toji, but with them both? you felt extra stuffed, double stuffed even..
“s-shiu ‘s big,” you moan, feeling him slowly ease his way inside—everything felt so hot. your ears, the very tips of them was probably fuming with a scorching temperature by now. “fuckkkk.”
“always the right size for you, baby girl,” shiu huffs out, a thumb strumming against your sides. you stare at toji and he’s got the biggest pout on his face. the fact that you two had history irked him for reason—again, he shouldn’t care. it shouldn’t bother him. the two of you weren’t even together but still. it pissed him off, he felt threatened—as if he had some sort of competition against his best friend. “there we go, easy now. bare with me,” and his voice was so low, right up against your ear. being double stuffed between the two of them, you whine. your hand placement was right onto toji’s beefy pecs before you tap on him, yearning desperately for his attention.
“what.” toji grumbles, his tone was sharp and he grips onto your waist just as you’re about there at taking both of them fully. his pout was cute, briefly glancing at shiu who was propped right up behind you.
his pecs were so soft, chiseled even. it flexed a bit each time you ran a finger against his skin and he shudders a bit. “can i…” you mumble, a quick short second stare averts towards his nipples. they were so hardened—perky, you felt awkward at even asking but they were so big, literally right in your face. “can i suck on them?”
“girl what?”
you moan, starting to move forward against the both of them, a pace starting—so incredibly stuffed, they both reached deep inside of both holes before you clench. you huff out a single breath before repeating yourself. “i said can i—”
“i ain’t deaf, i heard what ya said,” he responds, bringing the left cheek of your ass a brief squeeze. “you wanna suck on my … nipples?”
“awhhh. don’t be mean, let her suck toji. i’d suck too,” shiu cackles, and he starts up a jerking rhythm. you moan out, feeling the girth of them both wholly stretch you out. it felt too good, drool-worthy. “your tits, i mean—pecs are fuckin’ huge man.”
“shut up. y’er both fuckin’ weirdos,” toji swats, clearly irritated. it was cute, he was cute. he then averts his darkened green eyes back towards you, pleading with your eyes. “fuck. fine….fine. just not so rough, ‘m sensitive there.”
you smile, leaning near his chest before softly rolling your tongue against his nipple near his left chest.
you earn an abrupt strained moan from toji, and he wasn’t kidding. he really was sensitive there, his head throws back slightly—so much was occurring that you kind of forget how you were being stuffed full of not only one cock but two. you were quite vocal yourself. slumped against toji as you start to suck on his nipples, you gingerly nibble against it and he slips off a whine.
“aw, doll. you got him soundin’ like a girl.” shiu titters, and his rhythm had you moaning with toji’s pec right into your mouth—you felt your mouth ‘pop’ in surprise, feeling shiu’s fingers slither down against your back. his touch, it was so warm. the way he’d strum his fingers alongside your back had you throbbing desperately for more.
“s—shut up man,” toji groans, a hand grabbing onto your head. he gives it an awkward pat, not exactly wanting you to stop because it feels good. the way you flick your tongue against his nipple, lathering it with your saliva—so lewd, he’s always loved that part about you. he ruffles your hair and for a split second you can see that his eyes sort of soften. “shit baby. just like that…”
toji’s rough and mean demeanor went away for a moment it seems.
you whimper once you’re brought back to reality. reality of feeling yourself soak up both shafts buried deep inside of you, buried to the very hilts. your cunt pulsed and pulsed as you’re just rutting back and forth against him. you’re jerking, it was so repetitive as the bed creaks. it created the same harmonic noises of squeaks and creaks, forevermore ringing into both of your twitching ears.
“f-fuckin’ freaky girl,” he breathes through clenched teeth, watching as your eyes playfully linger up at him. “no one’s ever— did that to me before.”
your body felt so warm against theirs, both bodies colliding against you—you felt the pace quicken, clenching down on both of them before a whine slides out. your mouth was still primarily occupied, sucking on toji’s nipple. with a muffled, “mhm,” you suck down a bit deeper, making sure to coat every part of the center of his pec with spit.
he stares at you the entire time with dark dilated pupils, sucking his teeth before he feels his cock twitch inside you.
he was turned on….
yet after a while it dawned on him, toji wasn’t gonna cum from being inside of you with shiu, he was gonna cum from you sucking on his sensitive nipples.
a hard reality to face, he was the epitome of embarrassed.
“fuck,” he growls, watching you still attach your lips against his nipples—shiu continues to stuff you full from behind, he starts to feel his breathing rapidly pick up. toji’s thigh aches as he’s just bouncing it against you. “shiu, quit fuckin’ looking at me like that.”
“like what?” he chortles, and you were approaching close too — it was coming quick, so quick that you could barely even fathom anything.
you were merely drooling against toji’s hardened pecs, feeling as if you were in heaven. you always did wonder what his pecs tasted like, and it didn’t disappoint. you moan, lapping your tongue up against his nipple once more before he groans out again. this time, it’s the low pitched moan he always does when he gets close. his jaw tightens and he spanks your ass, a rough smack that brings you back into reality again for the umpteenth time. shiu snickers, making you arch forward in toji a bit more before purring, “aw. gonna cum just from our girl suckin’ on y’er tits?”
our girl.
for some reason, shiu addressing you as his and toji’s girl made you throb a bit. actually, ‘a bit’ was quite the understatement. you were convulsing, stuck in a lewd frenzy as you were just spasming out. every few seconds you felt shiu’s thumb prod against the outer part of your hole, his strokes was slow yet deep and thoroughly thorough. same with toji, although he was starting to merely bottom out. more like he already was.
“fuckkk,” toji groans, and you suddenly lean in to kiss him. he moans right into your mouth, tasting bitter arousal all on his tongue. he pants heavily, short two second pants pouring into your mouth. wrapping his arms around you, he shudders from the sudden cold air that wafts against his bare chest.
he ends up finishing inside of you, such sloppy ropes of cum pouring right into you—you slump against his chest once more, intaking all of his warmth before squeezing him dry.
shiu was reaching his peak too, the more he picks up his frenetic pace, the more he was so close to give you another deep filling. it was so sticky, you felt the remains of toji’s sopping cum run down your dripping cunt, jerking forward against him you let off a moan before reaching down to touch yourself.
“ah. no touchin’ our pussy.” shiu swats your hand away softly, pinning it behind your back.
yet everything comes to a halt when your phone rings.
your ears twitch at the loud screeching ring of your ringtone, it was more closer to toji so you mutter.
“who is it?”
“y’er dad.” he replies, fat thumbs turning the brightness down on your phone whilst he squints.
“a-answer it. just tell him ‘m busy.” you whine in a shaky voice, merely feeling yourself about to burst right into both of them.
“okay.” toji snickers.
toji swipes the green button to accept the incoming call, putting it on speaker for you all to hear.
“heyyy honey… i was just calling to check on you. i had to go step out for a moment to buy some beer. want anything?”
“hey buddy,” toji snorts. “she said she’s busy.”
“toji?” your dad responds with a tone of pure confusion. there’s a long three second pause before he adds onto his sentence. “uh. what’re you doing with my daughter’s phone?”
“well shit. that’s a good question,” and you nudge on toji, watching him merely burst out into a straight goofy guffaw. you’re so close to your orgasm that your vision started to blur. stars clouded your entire eyesight, and you feel shiu guide your hips to its inevitable release. “heh. ‘m just joking man. she’s …….. takin’ the trash out. left her phone on the table.”
“oh okay! that’s so sweet of her, tell her i said thank you.”
“i’ll be sure to do that,” toji grunts, his thick base thwacking against you — he was still a bit sensitive from his previous release, and shiu ends up dumping a load into you after a while. you end up mimicking his actions, releasing yourself but toji has to cover your mouth. “since you asked, i’d take a pack of beer too. we still up for the game tonight?”
“yeah man! go packers!”
toji sneers, feeling you coat his entire lap with your slick arousal. you were soaked, a quavering mess before shiu pulls out.
“i’ll talk to you later though. drive safe,”
and he tosses the phone aside once your father replies with a cheery “alrighty then!” he was so oblivious. if toji hadn’t have been covering your mouth when you orgasmed, you were sure he was gonna hear. it was a lewd sight entirely, you started to suck on toji’s fingers and he eyes you with a sly smile. he wasn’t so whiney anymore, in fact— you ended up squirting on them both with them still shoved inside of you, so much too.
it came out so much, you were filled up with slick amounts of seed as well as damping yourself. you feel all against toji’s chest, moaning before shiu spins you around to kiss him. you lean into his touch, still tasting a good amount of smoke thay resides on his breath.
toji watches for a few long seconds before pulling you to kiss him instead—you moan, savoring both of their tastes before you feel toji’s fingers skim against the entrance of your filled up pussy.
“wonder how y’er dad would react at you doing this instead of taking the trash out. getting stuffed by his two friends, tchhh,” he mutters, delving two thick fingers into your cunt— he swirls it into a circular motion before pulling it out, staring at the mess that coats his digits. “shiu. c’mere.”
shiu inches towards toji before smirking. he gives his best friend a sly grin before humming. “yes, toji?”
“taste her for me.”
shiu lets toji slide his fingers into his mouth, and he sucks on them.
slowly, he glides his tongue across his fingers, tasting every inch. you found it a little hot as you watched, the way shiu stared at toji in such a playful gaze—you started to feel like the third wheel for a moment.
“mhm,” he mumbles, cleaning both of his fingers before he pulls it out. a pretty sheeny cobweb of spit left his mouth before he wipes his lips, dark irises focusing back towards you. “you taste so sweet on toji’s fingers, doll. like you always have.”
it was so filthy, they were filthy and you only wanted more…
you gasp once toji suddenly drags you off his lap, making you bend over for him. “i want more of a taste, bend the fuck over, princess.”
you do, being face first between shiu’s parted thighs and he gives you a subtle head pat, a thumb slides against your lips before he brushes his finger to make your jaw hang open.
you had heart eyes, metaphorically, not literally but even still—
a sweetened whimper pours from your glossed lips the moment toji’s tongue swipes against your folds, wasting no time to suck near your throbbing impulsing nub, tasting the aftermath that they both created with no shame whatsoever.
in front of you, you wrap a hand around shiu’s length, staring into his eyes before suddenly near the edge of the bed, you jolt at hearing your dad’s voice through the phone . . .
“what the actual fuck am i listening to?”
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skrunksthatwunk · 1 year
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been wringing my hands about the concept of family therapy. scary stuff. like maybe it could help and we sure as hell need SOMETHING to change but i think it would be like taking a potato peeler to the soles of my feet
#look it probably works for a lot of ppl but every time i think about it as a solution for my Definitely Needs It family it's like. god no#it probably only works when everyone's willing to change and actually listen to each other#if i did it with my folks im worries they'd quit if they were challenged or talk shit about the therapist/methods afterwards#like im so worried the therapist would take their side and we'd be stuck giving in to them#only now with assurance from an expert that they're always right and we're wrong and ungrateful. not helpful!! negative progress#and if we tried to switch therapists my parents would be like oh you just can't accept responsibility 🙄🙄#you just wanted someone to tell you you didn't have to try or to coddle you or make us do what you want or whatever#aghhh it's so scary and it's not even on the table. no one wants this but i also think trying to mediate it myself would suck so fuckin bad#aughh. sorry i wanna write about it as like. a tags rant. here goes#my parents don't apologize for shit. ive legit seen it happen once. they justify and backpedal but they never acknowledge their bs#they treat the harm that comes from their methods with a sort of 'well what do you expect me to do about it?! (rhetorical)' vibe#like there is no way to improve. like the ability for parents to fail and be flawed means those things must be accepted uncritically#because they're trying and they have good intentions. but if they really wanted to help as they claim they would be willing to change#if you're trying to help someone and they tell you your actions didn't help or are hurting them you should change your methods so theyre#helped. but they operate on this assumption that their methods should always work and thud if they don't that we're too sensitive#'youre asking for too much' was kind of a major theme in my childhood is what im realizing#instead they justify and focus on intent or their kids' flaws (real or imagined). they want to change the reaction rather than the action#they dont want to help they just want the problem to go away. and quiet kids look like happy kids i guess#thing is i cant even cite that many manipulative things theyve said bc we all go quiet as soon as they use a disapproving tone#like they'll just be like 'skrunks >:/.' and that's it. i cant say anything. i know i wont be listened to and they fucking do it on purpose#theyre kinda shit at defending themselves but i can barely follow their lines of reasoning so it's so fucking hard to argue with them#it's also so unnurturing. why is us being unhappy or uncomfortable smth to blame on our failure n not smth you want to help with? wth#yk the thing about the Shut Down Tone is i recognize and resent it sometimes but it still makes me feel like im not giving them a fair shot#bc i dont even slightly challenge them much (& they dont have to say what they mean for us to cower) i feel like im misreading their tone#that im being too sensitive and thinking theyre being controlling for no reason. like im reading into it too hard and hating them when if i#pushed back they'd freely be good to me and change and be reasonable. but now it's becoming clearer that that's not the case bc they Do Not#and if i mention The Tone theyll just say im overreacting and that it's my fault for not sticking up for myself AGAIN!!!!!!#and it's so frustrating knowing what's going on and still having these doubts. i can't trust my gut or what i hear bc they might be right#they'll straight up lie or change their arguments or their story to get me to submit. am i being gaslit??? wtf#but i trust my (treated worse) brothers' accounts which helps. my parents brag about their parenting skills to us btw ✌️✌️
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nathaslosthershit · 2 months
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A Much Needed Interview (OP81)
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(Part 2 of Teen Dad) Summary: After the shock of Oscar revealing himself to be a former teen dad, he joins an interview in the hopes of clearing everything up and limiting the overwhelming amount of questions he has been getting.
“Oscar, it is nice of you to sit down with us. I know it has been an interesting few weeks for you and your family. How are you guys all doing?” The interviewer asks.
‘Yeah, y’know, I had expected to one day have to open up about it all, but I never thought I’d have to do it the way I did. It has been fine, obviously my kids are young enough to not be impacted because they aren’t on social media, but it has been strange for my fiancée who is now getting hundreds of requests on her private account. I have sort of decided to take a break from social media because the response has been overwhelming and like none before. Mostly positive but I think a few people have gotten the wrong idea so I was hoping to clear everything up.” Oscar rambled. He was more nervous about this interview than any he had done before.
“Of course. Why don’t we start at the beginning, how did you and your fiancée meet?”
“We actually met at one of my races. She went to support one of her close friend’s brothers. After the race that I sadly didn’t do too well in, I saw her with her friend and I was kinda frozen in my spot, immediately head over heels. Sadly, it seems like everyone but her noticed. I was too scared to do anything so I just watched her leave. I think I sulked for days, totally regretting my decision to do nothing. A totally heartbroken 16 year old. I looked for her every single race until she finally came back a few months later.”
“Oh please tell me you finally got the confidence to shoot your shot.”
“Nope! I just stared at her and stuttered when she caught me looking then ran off. I then had an amazing race, I think part of me was just trying to make up for the embarrassment and luckily it seems my car got the memo. After the race she came up to me and asked for my number.” God, he was blushing profusely at the memory. He knew he would be getting slack for this for a very long time. 
“Such a story! The young Oscar Piastri was no ladies’ man.”
“He was absolutely not. Soon after we started dating.” Oscar awkwardly laughed, sensing what was about to come up.
“And then kids came shortly after?” The interviewer asked with care in his voice, certainly able to sense Oscar’s change in attitude.
“Yeah. Uh, obviously not planned. I don’t think many people plan to become parent’s at 18. It was a shock… I didn’t handle it the best at first, something I think I will always regret. She was scared and while so was I, I should have been more supportive. I was embarrassed for a while. Felt like a total idiot. I didn’t tell anyone outside of my family and made them swear to secrecy. I also began to isolate myself from friends because I couldn’t bring myself to tell them but also felt terrible lying. A few months in I finally snapped myself out of it and began to focus on all the wonderfulness that was to come. I loved her more than anything and I would be lying if I said I hadn’t already imagined a life together in great detail. By the time we found out it was twins, a boy and a girl, I was ecstatic.”
“Well mate, I don’t blame you for your feelings. I definitely would have been a terrible father at 18 so I salute you.” The interviewer joked.
“Honestly, I had the same thought for a while, even when I was excited to have kids. I had so many doubts about it, I mean how could I not? But when it came down to it, I couldn’t afford to be anything less than a great father. Of course I had my moments, and still do years later, but I wouldn’t be able to let myself be anything less than I am. If you love your kids enough, you find a way.”
“How did having kids so young impact your career? Obviously it didn’t hurt it too much considering you are in your second year driving in Formula 1.”
“Well, I decided I wouldn’t advertise my situation unless a team was very serious about me. Prema knew, Alpine did too and of course McLaren does. All were welcoming and accommodating, as much as they could be. I don’t think I would have gone with any of them if they weren’t cool with it though. I realized the minute my kids were born I would give it all up for them, which scared the hell out of me.”
“That is admirable. All these years later you are still with their mother, correct?”
“Yes! I asked her to marry me over break. Everyone close to us had been confused as to why it took so long but we had discussed marriage together many times and made the decision that because our relationship moved so fast with having kids so young, we would wait a bit. I mean, we are still young but I honestly couldn’t wait any longer. She is everything to me and the most wonderful mother my kids could have.”
“Have your kids been around the paddock yet? I assume they are old enough to understand what you do.”
“They have been to the factory and come with me to meetings when we haven’t had a sitter for them. Luckily, they are both very well behaved in public, they also really like watching the races on tv and have somewhat of an understanding of what I do. They don’t believe I actually drive the car though.” Oscar rumbled. Trying to convince his twins that yes, their father actually does drive the cars they see going super fast, has been an ongoing issue. They seem to believe he is tricking them but have no problem believing Uncle Logan and Uncle Lando drive the cars. It has definitely humbled him immensely.
“Well you will have to fix that soon huh? Will they be attending races in the future?”
“I am trying to work that out with my fiancée actually. They are almost four so we don’t want them traveling too far, I also don’t believe they will be able to be entertained solely by the race the entire time so we have a lot to deal with. But I think seeing them on the paddock supporting me will be one of the best moments of my life. I selfishly can’t wait for them to come.”
The interview wrapped up shortly after that. Getting to reminisce on the start of his relationship and how far they have come and how many wonderful things are in the future put Oscar in a deliriously happy mood. He couldn’t wait to get home to his family. 
Walking through the door, he was immediately welcomed to the sound of toddler meltdowns. Fully entering the house, he saw his very tired fiancée rubbing her face as she tried to calm her babies down. Clearly this had been going on for a while.
Despite how upset she looked, she immediately perked up at seeing Oscar had returned. But that immediately went away as she remembered the screaming kids and how messy the house and herself were.
“Sorry honey, I know you are probably so tired after the interview and meetings earlier and these two missed their nap so they are so cranky and I just-” He cut her off with a kiss. Once he pulled away she looked at him, perplexed. A kiss from Oscar was never unwelcome but it was the last thing she expected at that moment.
“Hey, look at me.” He said as he put a hand on her cheek. “I love you and our little family so much and you never, ever have to apologize for something as trivial as this. Why don’t you go get in the bath and relax a little and I will try to wrangle these two, okay?” 
In her eyes, Oscar had never been hotter than he was now. Now it was her turn to surprise him with a kiss, even more passionate than the first. They would have continued if it hadn’t been for more screaming from their two kids.
Still, Oscar wouldn’t change a thing.
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kawluv · 19 days
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What should you learn from your Sun's house? [1-12]
Sun in the 1st house: You have to learn how to work in a team. Individualism and independence are wonderful, but do not forget that you are a part of society and interaction with people is inevitable. You need to learn how to listen and hear those around you. Don't resist working in pairs or in a team, it's okay to ask someone for help.
Sun in the 2nd house: You need to learn not to get hung up on finances, to switch attention from the material aspect of life to the lively emotional aspect. Be generous, share resources (but in moderation). Look deep down, not at the surface.
Sun in the 3rd house: The lesson here is that you do not carry information through yourself lightly, but seriously comprehend it and accept it. You should learn to slow down, slow down your mental processes and be more in the moment. When you are in your head a lot and thoughts are constantly spinning thoughtlessly in your head, you need to learn how to stop it and be in the moment.
Sun in the 4th house: People in this position may have a strong attachment to the family, so strong that it can stop their own development. Maybe it's not just a tie to the family, but specifically to comfort and safety. You need to learn not to be afraid to leave your comfort zone, not to get attached to your family so much that you forget about your own growth. Trust the world, the comfort zone may be wider than it is now, the main thing is to go beyond it and get used to a wider range of new things.
Sun in the 5th house: You need to learn how to express your creativity to other people, inspire them and motivate them. Appreciate not only yourself, but also those around you, whether they are friends or like-minded people. Be generous with the people around you and don't judge people for their personalities.
Sun in the 6th house: It may be important for the Sun in the 6th house to let go of control, to understand that people, just like you, are not perfect and this is normal. You need to learn to relax, not to take responsibility for something that is not your problem. Be more patient with other people, do not condemn their flaws and inconsistency with your standards. It's okay to make mistakes.
Sun in the 7th house: As the owner of this placement too, I realized an important thing for myself. You and I need to learn not to lose ourselves in relationships with other people. Attachment is not bad, but you should not focus on your partner / friend and put them at the center of your life. Learn to be alone, do not be afraid of loneliness, but accept it. Enjoy the time spent alone with yourself when you can take care of yourself or just relax. Find your favorite business, hobby and put yourself and your interests at the center of your life.
Sun in the 8th house: You need to take life changes easier. Rethink the situations in your head less, instead accept and let them go. Don't get hung up on getting revenge on someone, just let them go. Letting go and accepting is the way to harmony within. With them comes ease in life. Forgive other people and yourself.
Sun in the 9th house: In this house, the lesson will be tied to being in the state of a "student", not a "teacher". You should accept that you may not know everything in the world and your opinion may also be wrong and that's okay. Learn to listen more, accept more, absorb more. Do not teach people, do not think that you know how it will be better for another person. This is not your responsibility. People have different opinions, worldviews, and your truth may not be the truth for others. Don't impose your point of view.
Sun in the 10th house: Your lesson is not to give yourself completely to work, but to devote time to family, friends, and your hobbies. Learn to relax, remember about regular quality rest. Remember that you don't have to meet someone's expectations and exhaust yourself in order to be valued and loved. Patience and perseverance, of course, surmount every difficulty, but have you tried a long and high-quality sleep? Sun in the 11th house: It is necessary for you to learn to be flexible in communicating with people, to be able to share your feelings, and not to close yourself off from them. Accept that it is possible that you will not always do what you want and will not always be as individual as you would like. We live in a society, we are all connected and similar to each other.
Sun in the 12th house: Dear 12-housers, I understand that it can be hard for you to be down to earth, but you need to do it. Do not drown in your mind, get out of your stagnation and ascetism. Take a look at the world, communicate more with people, trust people. Don't miss the chance to have more joyful moments and experiences! Look beyond the usual, look wider.
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badbtssmut · 5 days
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Your boyfriend looks a little too good in his police uniform.
Contains: Jungkook is a cop, fucking while wearing his uniform, reader is handcuffed, bit of squirting, Jungkook telling reader not to cum yet, kinda roleplay-ish, pussy fucking from behind, missionary
“Yeah, like that? That what you want? Tell officer Jeon how much you like it.” You moan as he pounds into you, the metal of his handcuffs digging into your skin. “Pussy taking in all this cock so well, so fucking wet.” Your boyfriend cooed, gripping onto your wrists tighter as he sped up his hips.
He was still dressed in full uniform, the heavy weight of his utility belt pressed against your ass, his shirt still tucked in and his hardened cock poking between the gap of his undone pants, and you, laid bare before him.
“Yes, like that…” You dug your face into the mattress, frowning as you focused on taking in his size, feeling every vein and inch of his cock slide against your walls.
“Is that all? Don't make me repeat myself again. How much do you like it when I fuck you like this, slut? How much do you like your pussy used like the toy that it is? Hm?” Jungkook pressed, slowing down his movement before he stopped, keeping his cock tucked inside of you, waiting for your reply.
“Jungkook…” You whimpered, trying to move your hips back to feel the same pleasure as before, but he stopped you. His hands moved from your wrists to your waist, holding you in place. You could hear him laugh softly, amused at your frustration.
“Jungkook…” You started again, whining his name.
“Jeon for you.” He corrected you. You were surprised, not expecting him to keep up the roleplay, even with his cock buried in you.
You were too horny to fight, and just wanted him to keep going, so you obliged.
“Mr Jeon, I love it when you fuck me, feels so good, never wanna stop… Just keep going, please, fuck me and use me.” You whined, moving your head back, trying to get a look at his face.
He smirked, before leaning in closer and giving you a kiss. You kissed him back before he pulled away and resumed his rhythm, the sound of his belt and his thighs smacking against your skin filled the room, and you started to breath faster, before moans left your lips.
“Mm yes, right there…” You moaned, closing your eyes, letting the sensation of him hitting your spot wash over you.
“Yeah? Right there? That’s your spot, here?” He teased, hitting the same place.
You nodded quickly, unable to speak.
Jungkook then pulled out, before he flipped you over and got between your legs, entering you again. He leaned over you and caged you in, his arms on both side of your head, as he began to thrust.
Your arms were trapped between the bed and your back, and you were at his mercy, as he fucked you, making sure his cock rubbed against your g-spot every time. Your moans made him aware that he was hitting you in the right spot, and his cock twitched in response.
The bed creaked loudly, and his heavy breathing filled your ears. He looked down at your body, admiring the way your chest rose and fell with each thrust, and your eyes rolling back every now and then, and it pushed him closer.
Jungkook sat up, still moving his hips back and forth as he unbuttoned his jacket, pulling it off and dropping it next to him.
He then took the shirt off, exposing his sweaty torso, and he leaned down again, his hands now grabbing your bare chest.
Your tits bounced with each thrust, and you moaned louder, wrapping your legs around him, encouraging him to go deeper.
“Fuck.” Jungkook cussed, kneading your chest and rolling your nipples in between his fingers, causing you to whimper.
“Close…” You whined, feeling yourself near your climax.
“No, not yet, baby. Wait for me, yeah? Can you do that for me?” Jungkook whispered, now caressing your face. “Please baby? Need you five more minutes, can you? Please, wanna cum together, wanna cum with your pussy hugging my cock, need you to hold it a bit longer.” He nearly begged.
“Jeon, if you keep talking like that, I’ll…” You tried to tell him, but he silenced you with a kiss, moving his hips a bit faster.
It was torture, his pace was just enough to keep you on the edge, but not enough to send you over. You closed your eyes, focusing on his cock and his tongue slipping into your mouth.
Your feet kicked into the sheets, trying to hold it, but you couldn’t.
Jungkook could tell you were near your limit, and he sat up, raising your hips and pounding into you harder, chasing his own release. You whimpered, being at his mercy as he lifted your lower body and mercilessly pounded into you, him adjusting himself to fuck you into a higher angle made you nearly cry, as you could feel yourself coming closer and closer.
Finally, he released his load into you, moaning out your name and riding out his high, and you soon followed, squirting onto his cock and soaking the sheets.
“Mm..” He shuddered, keeping his cock in you and leaning in to kiss you.
“Baby…” You whimpered. “They hurt.” You reminded him.
Jungkook immediately reached down and took the handcuffs off, throwing them off the bed, and brought your wrists to his lips, kissing them.
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wanders-in-wonderland · 4 months
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Treatment Plan
Last night was supposed to be harmless New Year’s Eve fun, partying with friends, dancing with strangers, and maybe finding someone to ring in the new year with. I remember dancing and taking shots with a really hot guy at some club where we'd shared a new year kiss. There's nothing else in my memory and I don’t remember when I passed out but I wake up alone in a medical examination room, naked, gagged, and strapped down to a bed with my arms above my head and legs spread wide.
The door opens and four men walk in. The first one I recognize is the hot guy I'd made out with. Except now, he has the look of a doctor, dressed in a white coat, wearing a stethoscope and holding a clipboard. The other three men are wearing nurses scrubs and not a single one acknowledges me as they step into the room and close the door behind them.
The doctor glances down at his clipboard and looks at me, smirking slightly. “It says here you’ve been admitted due to your issues with obedience and self-control. I promise we deliver the best results here, so you, darling, will be in tip-top shape in no time,” his voice is tinged with mockery and I try to shake my head and explain that this is all a mistake, that I have no idea what is going on, and I’m not supposed to be here.
“Day one of this treatment regimen helps us establish a baseline of what we’re working with and involves some sensory deprivation just to enhance the effectiveness but I promise, you’ll enjoy it,” he purrs, coming to stand next to my head before sliding a piece of fabric over my eyes. I struggle uselessly against the bindings, trying to dislodge the blindfold but it’s too secure to move. I feel hands hold my head in place before someone else slides headphones over my ears and suddenly, I’m blind and deaf to the world.
There is nothing to prepare me for what comes next, and no way that I can have any ability to sense what they plan to do to me. I can feel tears pricking at my eyes, absorbing into the blindfold when suddenly, I feel fingers trail along my ribs.
I let out a muted whimper, my body instinctively lurching in response. The feeling is so overwhelming and I’m absolutely senseless and helpless. The fingers linger around my hips and dig in gently, making me jerk uselessly in my bindings. It’s almost too much for my body to handle, the unknown touches, the horrible anticipation and suspense of not knowing anything at all.
Without warning, the fingers dig harder into my ribs, tickling me harshly and mercilessly. I wail behind the gag and thrash desperately, begging for it to stop to no avail. The fingers don’t let up and my entire world has narrowed to the unbearable sensations those fingers are drawing out of my bound body. There’s nothing I can do except endure it.
My wails have died down to little mindless whimpers as the tickling continues to ravage my ribs and hips when I feel the fingers pull away finally. I gasp for air, hoping that this torture is finally going to be over. Suddenly, I feel fingers brush against my underarms and I scream so hard my throat feels raw. I’m yanking and pulling at the straps holding me down but I’m bound too tightly. Tears are flowing freely into the blindfold as my body jerks. The fingers dig devastatingly into my underarms and I’m inconsolable. The tickling feels like electricity going straight into my nerves and it makes my mind hazy.
There’s no mercy and no stopping. The fingers find every vulnerable spot on my body and there’s nothing to stop the wretched tickling that’s making me want to curl into myself and disappear. There’s no acclimation to the feeling or becoming desensitized to it all. Every single movement feels like my body is dancing on a live wire and I have no choice but to experience every devastating feeling.
Another set of fingers finds their way to my hard nipples and I can barely draw in enough air to scream as the stimulation adds to the overwhelming feelings crashing through my body. Flicks against my nipples make me squirm and moan.
Then, my world lights up behind my blindfold when I feel fingers on my clit.
The combination of tickling at every sensitive spot on my body and the focus on my clit shatters me. Every single nerve is pulled open and vulnerable to unforgiving, relentless stimulation and I know I’m dripping wet onto the bed under me. It’s all too much for my brain to process. Every force on my body pushes me closer and closer to an orgasm and it’s unbearable.
A sudden flash of pain hits my clit as someone’s fingers sharply pinch my throbbing button and I wail as my orgasm barrels through my body. None of the stimulation lets up and the fingers on my clit continue to force waves of pleasure through my body while fingers everywhere else drive my orgasm even higher. I’m delirious and barely coherent between all of the different assaults of stimulation that wrack my body.
I feel the fingers on my clit pull away and I’m gasping and shaking. The tickling at my ribs and underarms doesn’t relent and I can barely catch my breath enough to sustain my sobs. Fingers brush against my inner thighs and I can’t help but whine, hearing only my wild heartbeat thudding in my ears.
Suddenly, there’s a vibrator slammed against my clit and my mind breaks. There are too many things going on but my whole being is driven to focus on the horrible vibrator pillaging my clit with no mercy. My next orgasm shoots through me with no warning, no build up, no gentle waves of pleasure. Just pure ecstasy shooting deep through my body, so hard that I can feel it in my bones and it renders me completely broken.
I have no concept of time or place as the torture continues. My body moves on its own accord as it struggles and trembles, futilely trying to avoid every touch. It could have been ten minutes or ten hours when everything finally fades away and all of the hands touching me are gone. I lie there, limp, unmoving, unthinking, barely conscious. It takes me an immeasurable amount of time to catch my breath, my body still feeling phantom aftershocks of pleasure and torment. I vaguely register the feeling of someone pulling the headphones off of my head and I’m able to hear again.
“Oh darling,” his voice is the first thing I recognize, “I suppose I forgot to mention, this treatment regimen has ten levels. And we can’t move on from level one until you learn to control your body and keep still during your treatments. Clearly we’re not going to get there today, but perhaps you’ll do better tomorrow. Otherwise, you’re in for a very long stay here…”
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tojisbbygworl · 1 month
Text
The Apartment Across The Street - Sukuna x Reader
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In the short time he watches her, he learns 3 new things: 1. She has a mirror on the left side of the window. 2. She is completely unaware of how easily someone could see her in all her half-naked glory. 3. Sukuna could overpower her if it came down to it.
Or maybe it’s 4 things. From the beating of his heart and the warm rushing feeling heading towards his dick, he learns the drug he thought he needed might not be a drug at all.
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Words: 6.7k
Tags - 18+ MDNI, No Use of Y/N, No Curses, Set in late 90s/early 00s, Smut, Angst, High Sex, Missionary, Degredation, Marijuana, Slight x Toji (I can't help myself)
WARNINGS - Dead Dove, Dark, Non-Con/Dub-con, Breaking and Entering, Sukuna and Toji are criminals, Sukuna's a hitman, Choking, Violence
AO3 Version
Masterlist
author's note: Heyyyy! Okay I went a little too hard like I always do so this is a bit long and (imo) it get's a little intense so be warned. I hope you enjoy hopefully I have some motivation to keep writing. art cred: @innaillus
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That apartment used to be empty.
Sukuna hadn’t been home in a week. He doesn’t mind. He’s learned to not have too many hopes or expectations in this line of work. Besides, he prefers being his own boss. He accepts contracts when he needs money then he’s off until it runs out. Doesn’t matter if they take days or even weeks.
Shorter jobs like this one weren’t his treat. They don’t pay as much as he likes, but it works out. These apartments were a bit shitty, they didn’t cost too much. And, he was right in the middle of the city. Easy to meet clients. The clubs went on all night long. Which is exactly how late he was out when he was home. Actually, he was planning to go out tonight. Meet up with Toji and see if he can’t get a woman in his bed by 2 am.
He wondered how long it would take to see his newest neighbor. The way the apartments in the complex are built, you could easily see into your neighbor’s bedroom. 'State guidelines say blinds aren’t required. You buy them,' was the response he received when he brought the problem up to the landlord. A lot of people invested in curtains, maybe they hadn’t bought any yet. He saw a bed, but it seems to be the only thing they’ve managed to set up. There were a couple boxes with flaps wide open sitting beside it.
After a few more moments of rumination, he closed his curtain and laid down on his bed waiting for a text to come over. In truth, he couldn't wait to see who was unlucky enough to be his new window neighbor. The last one didn’t go too well. They also didn’t invest in curtains and he isn’t entirely sure if he’s the reason they moved out, but he’s sure they didn’t appreciate catching his stare multiple times a day. And that one time at midnight.
-
All it took was the next morning.
Sukuna’s eyes crept open and he stared towards the ceiling. The girl he brought home last night was dead asleep and naked on his chest. He yawned and wiped his face tiredly. He nudged the girl off of him a bit, then sat up on the side of his bed. Ugh, he felt like shit. Toji always went entirely too hard when they went out, but Sukuna doesn’t mind. He has nowhere to be. Nothing to do. 
He got up and stretched then walked to the bathroom. As he completed his morning routine, he pondered about what today would behold for him. This is another reason he hated short jobs. Sukuna loves free time, but only if there’s something to do with it. There never really is.
He could kill that girl in his bedroom. In fact, he could have killed any girl he brought home since he moved in half a year ago. But the last time he made his job his hobby, it didn’t go so well for him. It was too close of a call, and getting arrested for murder just isn’t worth it. He could spend a couple months in the pen, not years at a time.
He spat out his toothpaste. Life was so fucking mundane. He had no life goals, barely any friends, his little brother hates him, and he works alone. All things he doesn’t actually care about, but shit, when is he going to get some excitement? Nothing gets him going anymore.
He needs something that will make him feel. A drug of some sort? But that doesn’t seem right to him. Even now as he walks back in the room staring at the woman in his bed, he feels nothing. If she woke back up and decided she wanted to have sex with him, he would say yes, but only because it’s something to do. He’s not feeling any particular way about her.
The moment he sat back down on the bed, she started shifting around. A few seconds later, she lifts her head and yawns. “Good morning.” She giggles, she leans over and kisses his cheek. Sukuna grunts.
The girl looks around the dark room. “It is morning, right?” She doesn’t let him answer before she stands up and opens the curtains. “Oh wow,” she exclaims. “I can see directly into your neighbor’s room.” She says. He still doesn’t get up, just hums at her.
“She’s cute though.”
Sukuna perks up upon hearing that. “Oh yeah? I haven’t seen her yet. She’s new.”
This was the first time since they’ve met that she said something interesting, but unfortunately for him, she drops the subject immediately and walks back into bed, leaving the curtains open. Sukuna holds back his sigh. Does he really want to spend the rest of his morning with this girl? It was half past 8. Way too early.
“I'm going to start getting ready for work,” he says without skipping a beat. She stops in her tracks and blinks at him, clearly not expecting that. It’s silent for a few moments. Sukuna’s not sure what she’s waiting on, but if it’s for him to say he’s kidding or let her stay, she’s sorely mistaken.
“Oh, I thought you were contracted,” she says nervously.
‘I only work when I feel like it, gorgeous.’ Sukuna inwardly curses himself for his suave nature. “Yeah. I got a contract. In an hour.”
His curtness and annoyed expression did good to make her feel completely and totally unwanted. The girl awkwardly smiled at him. “Oh, ha ha. Yeah…okay.” Sukuna got up and walked out of the room. Give her a little space to feel like shit while she gets ready to leave. He makes himself a cup of coffee, his face still that same blank expression even after he hears her rushing out the door from behind him. When she’s gone he takes himself back into his room.
He walks up to his window to close the curtains once more until someone catches his eye. He freezes and his eyebrows shoot upwards. That girl was right. She was cute. And he had the perfect view of her. She seemed to be posing or checking herself out. Sukuna wasn’t sure which one it was, but he hoped she didn’t stop. That bikini she had on was doing wonders for her, and him.
Something was off. Looking at her made him…tense. His hands were gripping the curtains, he was biting the inside of his cheek, his leg was shaking; Was it anxiety? No, she’s not making him nervous. What he’s feeling is euphoric. He likes it. He wants to grip her bare waist and squeeze her until she bruises.
In the short time he watches her, he learns 3 new things: 1. She has a mirror on the left side of her window. 2. She is completely unaware of how easily someone could see her in all her half-naked glory. 3. Sukuna could overpower her if it came down to it. Or maybe it’s 4 things. From the beating of his heart and the warm rushing feeling heading towards his dick, he learns the drug he thought he needed might not be a drug at all.
-
It doesn’t take long after that to finally meet her.
Before taking his most recent job, Sukuna had nearly consumed everything in his fridge. What was left was now finished and he spent a lot of his morning sulking at a half empty milk carton, his breakfast for the day. He hated eating out, it messed with his figure.
The local grocery wasn't too bad of a walk from his place, although he hated carrying everything back. He always bought a few necessities and a few ingredients to quickly whip something up for his dinner. Today, he’d have to bulk up if he doesn’t want to keep coming back.
As much as he hated the public, shopping never seemed to be a problem for him. He was tall and intimidating, he never smiled, he was always tense; people tended to avoid him like the plague. He appreciated it. But, as he enters the frozen meal aisle with his cart half full he wishes that just for a moment, he looked approachable. Then, this would be much easier.
There she was, in sweatpants and a cropped tube top, looking at the frozen pizzas. She looked like she had been home all day. She was much cuter now that he could see her better. A lot cuter. She’s pretty as hell.
Thank goodness, too. He already knew what her body looked like, what with her constantly taking pictures of herself in front of the window. She liked to play dress up, she would try on entirely different outfits before she was satisfied. Pretty soon, the colors of her bras and panties would be ingrained into his memory.
He stood there looking her up and down for a few more seconds before he started browsing once more. Although he really was looking for food he wanted, he used this opportunity to slowly get closer to her. He pretended to be interested in some frozen broccoli and he snuck a look at her. To his surprise, and enjoyment, she had done the same. When they made eye contact, she jerked and looked away. A couple moments after that, she grabbed her food and walked away into another aisle.
Sukuna chuckled to himself. She wouldn’t get away that easily. He dropped the broccoli in his cart and followed after her. He hadn’t seen which aisle she’d gone into, so he kept walking down and looking into each one until he found her trying to get some chips from a high shelf. He smiled upon seeing her struggle. Maybe this would be easier than he thought.
He managed to walk right up behind her and reach for the chips she was trying to get before she got startled. She gasped a bit and looked up at him. He looked down at her. Fuck, she was pretty. His heart started to pound, he could practically salivate at the idea of taking her home.
He hands her the chips before she can say anything, then walks away. Before he’s out of her sight he hears her say, “Thank you so much.”
Her cadence, the velvety softness of her voice; it made him want to drop to his knees. How sweet would she sound if he bit into her neck? How soft is her yelp when she stubs her toe? How shrill is her scream when she’s in pain?
Her appreciation made him stop in his tracks. He turned over his shoulder to look at her. She seemed nervous and her eyes were uncertain. Sukuna began to feel restless. So many ideas of what he could do to her if he got her alone were rushing through his mind and she was none the wiser. This aisle has been empty and no one has come by. He could take her right now.
Instead, he looks her up and down. “Yeah, sure.” And then he walks away with his shopping. He leaves wondering when next they’ll meet, she does the same as she watches his back.
-
“Still haven’t called the maintenance guy, huh? Lazy jackass.”
Sukuna turns his head to the side and glares at his unwanted guest. Toji may have been his best friend, but that doesn’t mean he didn’t want to break his fat neck and bury him in the park. Besides, that title meant jack shit. They met in jail and Toji helped him get on his feet when Sukuna’s sentence was up. Toji never really left him alone and Sukuna stayed because his family was rich. If anything, they were close acquaintances who had sex sometimes.
Speaking of Toji’s money, the asshole grew up in an affluent family which means his standards were a bit too high for the humble abode that Sukuna prefers. It was probably the most annoying part about him. He was complaining about the door to the bathroom. It didn’t close correctly so you had to force it shut. Something that just isn’t enough of a problem to be bothered to try and fix.
“Stop coming over if it annoys you so much,” Sukuna responds, taking another drag from their second blunt for the morning. He was finally starting to feel something from it and he didn’t want to hear Toji whining about bullshit.
“Nah, I think I’ll keep coming. Especially with your fine ass neighbor.” Toji walked away again, not seeing Sukuna’s head jerk towards him. What was he talking about? Sukuna didn’t tell him about her. Did he see her?
“Why the fuck are you in my room?” He gets up to follow behind him. Sukuna looks down the hallway and sees both his room and the bathroom doors wide open. The bathroom was empty. “Get out.”
He starts walking towards his room door but jumps back when Toji rushes out of it. “Come look at this,” he says, grabbing his arm.
Toji had this crazed grin on his face and he was tugging him along impatiently. “What the hell are you-” Sukuna’s words die in his throat as he gazes upon what had Toji so excited. It was his beautiful neighbor changing in front of her mirror again except, there was a big problem. She had never been completely naked before.
Holy shit, her body could stop a truck. Sukuna let his jaw drop. His eyes raked her from her breasts to her legs. She would turn around occasionally, walk back and forth in front of the window, oh he loved the way her tits bounced. He wanted her on top of him, his dick sliding in and out of her while he latched onto her nipple.
“She’s sexy as fuck, huh?” Sukuna’s unceremoniously snapped out of his trance by Toji’s comment. He turns his head towards him looking at his smile and twinkling eyes. “She do this all the time? Does she even know?” Toji gasps and looks him in the eye. “Does she do it on purpose?”
I’m that moment, a switch had flipped inside of Sukuna. Toji was watching her before he brought him in here. He saw her naked first. He shouldn’t have seen her at all. The warm swarm of butterflies in his abdomen had fluttered away, a feeling of rage building in his heart instead. She was Sukuna’s to look at, not Toji’s.
To answer his question, Sukuna shrugs. Then, they both turn towards her again only to make eye contact with her. They see her gasp, cover herself and shriek before running from the window. “Fuck,” they say in unison before shutting the curtain.
“I blame you for that,” Toji says despite both of them being at fault. He puts his hands in his pockets and walks out of the room. “Where’s the blunt?”
Toji may have forgotten about that little encounter, but Sukuna doesn’t think he can forget anytime soon. He hates that Toji got to see her like that. They still haven’t spoken more than once to each other, and now she knows he’s a pervert that stares at her through their windows. Sukuna scowls at the ground then slams his hand into the wall. She’ll leave soon just like the last one did, but this time, he doesn’t want to accept that as a possibility.
He gives himself time to calm down before joining Toji again. He can’t bring work home again.
-
It was over.
He saw her once after that incident. Waiting for Toji to pick him up for the night, he stood outside the local gas station smoking a cigarette. She’d been on his mind since. She invested in curtains, unfortunately. She was really uncomfortable. He’s not even sure if she’s left the apartment.
Thinking about what happened made him furious. If Toji hadn’t gone into his room he would have never seen her. Oh he just can’t shut the hell up about the shape of her ass and how he would let her suffocate him with her gorgeous thighs. Sukuna sighed, her thighs were gorgeous weren’t they?
She was a missed opportunity. There are so many ways he could have started something with her. It’s not like she didn’t like him, had they met again before that, he’s sure he could have gotten her number. Usually, missing out on a woman wasn’t that bothersome, but she was different for him. He looked forward to beating his dick under the windowsill while she tried on clothes. His imagination wasn’t bad, but by the time he came in his hands, his dick was red and sore and his arm was tired.
His memory is not enough. He wants her.
He looks at the time on his watch. A quarter ‘til midnight. He rolls his eyes. Toji’s always late. A quick snack is in order.
Sukuna mindlessly stares at the powdered donuts wondering if he really feels like fucking up his clothes and having dirty fingers. He hates club bathrooms, the one here is just as bad, and he doesn’t want to lick his fingers. Maybe he won’t. But right before he decides to leave, the door opens. He turns his head upon hearing the small ring of a bell, but doesn’t pay attention to the culprit until they’re in the same aisle. “Oh shit,” he said before he could stop himself.
He tries to look away before she notices, but it’s too late. He looks back at her and grimaces. The girl is shaken to her core. Poor thing is afraid. And while Sukuna feels a bit bad about making such a cutie so frightened, it kind of…warms his heart. She takes in a deep breath and twists back around. She doesn’t even buy anything. She just leaves.
He almost chases her. He stands in the aisle still reveling in her presence. He breathes deeply thinking about how nice it felt to have such power over someone. Hm.
Sukuna leaves the store only a few moments after her. Toji’s BMW was running next to a pump as he got out of the car. “Oh shit, there you are.” He grins. “Guess who I just saw.”
“I know. She was running from me.” Sukuna says, getting into the passenger seat.
Toji cackles while driving away. “Damn, so she’s scared of us, huh?” Sukuna shrugs. “She looked like it. Girl was huffing it. Actually…she ran down the street towards where we’re going.”
Sukuna raises a brow at him. Toji doesn’t say anything and just keeps smiling. “So?”
He turns on his beamers and slows down as he drives between the apartment buildings. Sukuna’s eyes widen as he realizes just what Toji’s trying to do. And soon his lips follow. Just up ahead was a figure with a hoodie walking very quickly. They turn around and immediately shield their eyes from the bright lights. It was her.
She seemed confused at first, and the bright light contrasted with the darkness of the night blinded her from seeing who was in the car. However, she didn’t stop walking or slow down. She decided to mind her business instead. It could be anyone. Anyone. Even though it was the same car waiting at the gas station.
Despite her telling herself that she’s okay, she couldn’t help but notice how they were matching her speed. And that once they had gotten right behind her, the window was rolled down. And that she still had a block left to go.
“Ay,” Sukuna shouted from behind her, effectively terrifying her. She turned to see his smile and upon further investigation, she saw Toji’s from the driver’s seat. Oh no. “You can’t say hi? You scared of me?” He taunts.
She ran.
-
And that was the worst thing she could have done.
There have been a few recent instances that made her question her move to this city. She was hoping to start a new life, away from her family, away from her ex, make some new friends; she didn’t think she would be planning to move out after a couple months.
That man…she didn’t know what the hell his problem was. Why did he and his friend follow her out of the gas station? Was he crazy? Did she do something to him? Since they followed her, she’s been racking her mind trying to figure out what the hell she did to deserve this. Before that, she had only ever spoken to him once at the grocery store. He was extremely intimidating, but she was intrigued by him. She didn’t mean to stare, but he was very attractive. Clearly he had seen it as some sort of invitation. Maybe he followed her into that aisle and it wasn’t just an act of kindness.
Coming home after work had become so much more nerve wracking. In fact, coming out of her unit brings her horrible anxiety. She’s constantly looking over her shoulder. Tries to pretend the building across doesn’t even exist. She doesn’t understand what took her so long to get curtains; it just wasn’t a priority for her. Either way, she didn’t deserve to be punished for her forgetfulness.
She’s in a weird position where the longer she goes without seeing him, the more worried she becomes even though she never wants to see him or his friend again. Currently, she was in the elevator heading up to her apartment. She was catching her breath and trying to relax now that she was safe. She does this everyday now.
She couldn’t wait to be home. The entire day she’s been feeling like complete crap. Her heart refused to leave her stomach. She dropped so many cups behind the bar that she spent more time sweeping and wiping up drinks than making them. And she was on the verge of tears the entire time. It was nice to be home, but she wondered how bad it would be tomorrow.
In fact, it was so bad today that although she was physically relaxed, her brain just wouldn’t be quiet. It kept telling her to stay alert, that there was still something waiting for her. She tried her best to ignore it and enjoy her night. She was going to kick off her shoes, rip off all her clothes, warm up her leftovers and hit her bong. She was off tomorrow and she is not planning on leaving her room at all.
She messed with her keys when she approached her door. All the apartments had two locks, a deadlock and a lock on the handle, but she was looking for another that she could attach herself. The home goods store near her didn’t have any promising ones, so she had to wait on a shipment.
She reached for the handle to unlock it. Her hand twisted the lever and she retracted it immediately. Her heart starts racing once more, but then she realizes the door was still closed. When she can’t get the door open, she sighs in relief. The deadlock was still intact and locked. The apartments are just shitty.
As relieved as she was in that moment, this just meant she had another problem to deal with. She couldn’t go with one of her locks not working, especially not the handle. In fact, maybe she’ll deal with it tonight. She does have tools and she can be pretty handy when she needs to be.
Like she wanted to, she kicks off her shoes and rips off her jacket. She almost takes off her clothes before she notices a certain smell in the air. Her apartment smelled of weed, but it smelled like someone was actively smoking right at that moment. Maybe it was her next door neighbor.
She walks through her silent home. Maybe she should get a cat. There are quite a few friendly strays around. She could afford-
What was that noise?
A bump. In her bedroom.
What could it have been? Had her worst fears come true?
No. It’s not possible…so why had that sinking feeling returned in full force? There was nothing in her room. There was no one in her room…
-
Toji had broken the lock for him. 'Just record it for me,' was his end of the bargain.
The place was just as cute as he thought it was. She still had a lot of things unpacked, and she hadn’t gotten a couch for the living room. Hm. He wonders if she really is planning on leaving. That would not be good.
He would want her to stay, but if she can get away from him, at least he’ll get a taste of her.
She leaves her weed out. Hm…he would enjoy this better if he were high. And he’ll make her smoke too. 
When he heard her coming closer to her room, he put the bong down and stood up. Her room was small and it was pitch black, the only light coming from the embers in the bowl. He hit her closet door and she heard it. Fuck. He hopes she doesn’t get a weapon out.
And she didn’t. This girl is…something else.
He hides right behind the door in between the wall and the hinges. Then, he waited quietly and patiently until she slowly opened the door and turned on the light. And before she could try to look around, he slammed the door shut behind her.
-
It all happened in a second.
She heard the door slam and time froze. She told herself then and there, that she was going to die tonight. She knew who her killer would be before she turned around. Did she even want to?
She didn’t have a choice, her body reacted before she could think. All she saw was a small scowl, he had brown eyes, but they looked tainted with blood. His hands, his large hands, shot towards her head and before she could scream he trapped her mouth shut. His other hand gripped the back of her head.
She fought him as violently as she could. She scratched his face, pulled his hair, tried to poke him in the eyes; but he was quick to show her that he was much stronger than her. He pulls his hand off of her mouth and smacks her across the face. She can only scream for a second before his hand is back on her mouth and he pushes her into the bed.
Sukuna takes his hand off of the back of her head and squeezes her neck. He still holds her mouth shut. She gets weaker and weaker as the oxygen leaves her brain. He leans down towards her face to speak to her. “You want to live?”
Tears had long been streaming down her face, but this is the point where she finally breaks down wailing. She lets her arms fall and Sukuna loosens his grip on her neck. But only slightly. She takes a deep breath and cries into his hand. “Answer me,” he says. “Come on, pretty girl.”
She cries a bit more before nodding her head in defeat. “I know. You’re gonna do what I say?”
She nods again. “You’re not gonna scream when I take my hand off?” She sniffles and sobs again. “Because you want to fucking live, right? Right?” He tightens his grip on her neck again. She kicks her feet and nods as best as she can. “Go turn off your light and turn on your lamp. You’re gonna smoke with me.”
He gets off her and watches her to make sure she does what he asks. It takes her a minute, she lays there quietly sobbing and wiping her tears while Sukuna takes another hit of her bong, but eventually she gets up to turn on her lamp, then flip her light switch. “Lock the door too. I like the feeling of extra privacy when I’m taking a woman to bed.”
-
He disgusts her.
He forces her to take several long hits that had her in horrible coughing fits. And of course, it wasn’t long before she was completely inebriated. She couldn’t really move too much, or think too much. But even though she was out of commission, she could hear every word Sukuna said to her.
He talked her ear off about how he’d been looking at her for a week before they met at the grocery store. All the way up until she realized just how exposed she was from catching him and his friend staring. It was her fault, is what he said. He said she was stupid to not think anyone could see her. She should have gotten blinds or curtains when she moved in. A fucking dumbass bitch.
That’s how she felt.
He taunted her as he watched her take her clothes off. His dick was already in his hand, he had been hard for a while. Imagining his dick finally pounding into her as he squeezes the life out of her.
‘I think you wanted someone to watch you,’ he said to her. She hung onto every word he said, answered every question he had. ‘You’re an attention seeking slut, aren’t you? Nod your head.’ And she did. ‘What’s your name?’ And she told him. ‘Take that shit off faster and come hit this again.’
She was completely out of it, but instead of floating, she sank. She sunk deeper into the bedsheets, Sukuna weighing her down with every word. Every stroke of his hand on her thigh, every lick on her neck and collarbone, every bite on her chest. When he reached down between her legs and stroked her clit, she moaned, then cried in shame.
“Shhhh,” he whispered in her ear from behind her. “You’re gonna love me. And if you’re good I won’t hurt you.” He kisses her ear, then nibbles on it. He leaves a trail of wet kisses down the side of her neck. She cries and shakes, twisting her head away from him as best as she could. Sukuna’s hands explore her body eagerly. He can’t decide whether he wants to grip her hips or play with her nipples. She was so soft, just as he imagined.
He flips her onto her back. “Look at me, baby.” She opens her eyes only slightly, her tears blurring her vision completely before falling. He takes his hand to cup her cheek and wipe them with his thumb. As she gazed upon his naked body on top of hers, she accepts her fate: this man was going to rape then kill her.
He looked deranged. His brows were knit together with a lopsided grin. Her body is racked with sobs once more. “It’s okay,” he tells her. “Shhhh.” He slowly brings his thumb wet with salty tears to her mouth. She tries to pull her head away, but he quickly attaches his hands back to her mouth and head then he leans down towards her. “I thought you said you wanted to live.”
She’s actually not sure at this point. Does she want to live with this trauma? Does she want to continue being this man’s neighbor for him to torture however he sees fit? Does she want to have to look at his building every single day living in fear that he’ll do it again? Living in fear of his friend getting any bright ideas?
“Just relax.” He lets go of her head and goes for her neck. She moans as he bites and sucks on it, making sure to leave a mark reminding her of what he did. It won’t be the only one.
Sukuna slowly takes his hands and lifts both of her legs in the air. He licks his fingers while looking at her, then bites his lip as he plays with her clit once more. She breathes harder and harder with every rub. They don’t break eye contact, it does something to him. He’s reveling in her fear. Her eyes were shot, her mascara and eyeliner running down her face. It made her look even more beautiful. She was making him feral.
Sukuna’s dick was an angry scarlet and dripped precum all over her leg where it rested. He was big and it scared her even more. As his eyes explored her body, he got hungrier and hungrier. He slides a finger inside of her and starts pumping. Her pussy was slick with her arousal.
“Fuck,” he whispered putting in another finger. He pumped his fingers hard enough to make her wetness splash. She threw her head back and arched her chest into the air. She sounded just as sweet as he thought she would. She was turning out to be everything he wanted and more. He wasn’t waiting any longer.
He yanked his fingers out of her and searched her bedside table for his camcorder. She whined when he removed himself from her and watched him. Sukuna pressed record.
“Say hi to Toji,” he told her, sticking the lens in her face. She closes her eyes and tries to avoid the camera. He grips her chin with his fingers and forces her head forward. “Ain’t she pretty?” Sukuna pulls away from her face to record her body. He takes her tit in his hand to play with. He jiggles and pulls on her nipple before smacking it. When she squealed he did it again.
“He’s gonna love watching me fuck the shit out of you.” Sukuna sat and balanced the recorder on her nightstand perfectly angled to show their torsos and hips. He gets back on the bed to grab her waist and pull her towards his. He groaned when he felt his dick rub against her pussy. “You know who I’m talking about, right? My friend? You know he saw you before I did.”
He pauses to spit into his hand and starts jerking his throbbing shaft. “I wanted to kill that fucker.” Sukuna leans over once more and kisses her several times before capturing her lips in one long and forceful kiss. He rubs his dick against her entrance as he does this, with a desperate moan from both of them to accompany it. Sukuna rests his forehead against hers. “Tell me you’re mine.” His eyes are fiery, and she doesn’t wish to find out what will happen if she fails to do what he asks.
His tip begins to poke through her entrance. She whimpers and he brings his head down and bites her lip. “Come on…”
“I’m yours-” He finally starts tucking his dick into her. The feeling of being inside her was heaven on Earth. He wasn’t ashamed of how loudly he moaned. She was louder anyway. They always are. Even when they don’t want it.
“My name is Sukuna.” She takes all of him like a fucking champ. And looks good as fuck while doing it. And her voice…
“I’m yours, Sukuna.”
A tear ran down her cheek. The dragging of his dick against her walls was nothing like she’s ever felt before. It felt so good, but she was the unhappiest she’d ever been. She’s terrified and unsure if she’ll live to see tomorrow. He says he won’t kill her if she’s good, but what does good even mean to him?
She knows there’s nothing she really could have done to avoid what was currently happening to her. This man- no, Sukuna, saw her when she was first moved in and decided then and there that he wanted to rape her. No matter what he claims about her being rude and ignoring him when he helped her. And yet, she blames herself.
If she had just gotten curtains or blinds early enough, then maybe she could have avoided him. Or maybe she wouldn’t have existed to him at all. At least he wouldn’t have known what floor she was on or her room. Maybe he wouldn’t have known what building she was in.
She was so fucking stupid.
-
He repeated that all night.
‘Stupid fucking bitch,’ he would mutter under his breath. ‘Changing in front of a window, thinking no one’s gonna see you? Posing in mirrors and shit?’ He fucked her at a smooth and steady rythym, she was soaking wet and splashing all over his stubble. The sheets were damp underneath. ‘Oh yeah. You like it when I talk to you like that?’ She couldn’t stop herself from crying in humiliation.
He asked her to cry louder for ‘Toji’, which she did, and he proceeded to smack her across the face for being too loud.
He felt amazing, he pushed her legs into her chest and hammered into her. She cried into his mouth as she came all over him. Her pussy squeezing his member drive him insane and before he knew it he was cumming inside her. ‘Fuck…’ He pulled out and jerked the rest of his cum onto her pussy and thighs. He quickly grabbed the camera to show Toji, with the flash on.
‘Look at that shit,’ Sukuna made sure to examine her at every angle. He pushed his finger into her and chuckled when she moaned. His index was covered with his cum and he brought it and the camera up to her body and face.
She was completely tired out. She couldn’t move, she couldn’t speak, she could barely even lift her eyelids. Sukuna kissed at her like a dog, then maneuvered the camera to her face. Her face was soaked with tears and spit. Her makeup had smudged everywhere and ran down her cheeks. Her hair was a mess, and she ached everywhere.
Her mouth hung open and Sukuna proceeded to jam his finger into it. He used it to pull her head back over to him and made out with her. Then, his dick started poking her ass.
She had no idea what time last night they were finally done, talk less of when she actually fell asleep. He smoked a blunt after the whole thing, sat her up so he could make her smoke too. He found her liquor cabinet. The night got worse.
She puked her guts out then fell asleep on the floor, but now she was in her bed trapped underneath him. They were both naked. She was sore as the day was long. He snores next to her. Holy fucking hell. She’s alive. Why is she alive?
She starts breathing heavily and looking around her room. She doesn’t know what to do. She didn’t think she would still be here.
In a flash, he’s up. His hand is over her mouth, and his eyes are staring into hers. He has a poker face. She shakes in his clutches and her eyes fill with tears already. “Relax. Listen to me. I know what you’re planning.”
What? What is he- “I dare you to fucking try and move away from me. I will follow you and ruin your life.”
“You said you were mine last night? Then you’re mine. You’ll do what I say, and I’ll do as I please with you. Do you understand?”
All she could do was nod. What could she say? She was planning on moving despite not having the money for it. She would have to save up. And now that he’s shown her what he’s capable of, why would she take the risk? 
Why is this happening to her? What did she do to deserve this? Want a better life for herself?
-
Sukuna was pleased with how the morning was going.
She was sitting on a stool in her dining room watching him make them breakfast with an ice pack on her face and a blanket over her body. She didn’t know what to think.
Suddenly, he perks up and turns towards her. “You got a phone, pretty?” 
She could throw up again. She swallows and points towards the hall . “My room,” her voice was hoarse and weak. “On the other side of the bed.”
He pauses and blinks at her. She gets scared again wondering what she did wrong this time. He turns the heat off. “You’re coming with me.”
Toji answers in a flash. “So, how was it?”
“You’re gonna like what you see.” He turns towards where she’s sitting on the bed. “Isn’t that right?” She’s not amused.
“Are you…are you with the bitch right now?” Toji asks.
“Yeah,” Sukuna makes his voice dreamy. “We’re going steady.”
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ending a/n: Please lmk what you think ! Thank you for reading !
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