#the absolute insanity that makes me feel. the fact that for the entirety of that book call has no clothes of his own and is stuck wearing--

[nonbinary-androids]

I have returned to my natural state, which is chewing on The Silver Mask like a dog with a bone and a vengeance bc it absolutely should have been the best Magisterium book. It has all the ingredients it needs to blow every other book clear out of the water... but it just doesn't commit all the way to any of them and instead continues to pale in comparison to Iron Trial.

Like.... we have Aaron comes back Wrong, Tamara having to choose between her loyalty to Call and her loyalty to the Magisterium/Assembly, Call really actually wholly taking on the mantle of the Enemy of Death and being faced with the same situations that Constantine was in, getting more up-close time with Master Joseph, Alex, and Anastasia, Jasper is.... there, I think, and Rufus is forced to confront that the system he's spent his life perpetuating fucking sucks!!!! and is actively harming not just his partner but his beloved student!!!!!

HOW is TSM now better than it was!!!!

[kamiversee]

The F*ck List (semi-official) Breakdown.

The following was submitted by my lovely ☃️anon, & I needed to make this it’s own post given how long it is, my replies & clarifications are written in between this breakdown & theory (Ex: A/N > Etc.). 

Here, you’ll find majority of details you may have missed & maybe even more to think about. Enjoy :)

(wc; 5.7k) (content; spoilers ofc)

holy shit Kami. i literally had to take the entire day to process everything. before anything else, i need you to know that you've created an absolute masterpiece. TFL was the first fic i ever cared to keep up with and it has set the bar impossibly high for any other writer out there. please take your time with TFL 2, i'm so excited to read your other work!! also a break sounds like it would be so good for your mind considering how long you've dedicated yourself to this story 😭😭😭 you're seriously impressive. heads up, i didn't proofread this at all bc i finished typing this at 4 am LMFAO so forgive me if it's all scrambled and makes no sense.

┏━━━

A/N > Thank you for taking the time to write this breakdown, I seriously appreciate it so I wanted to take my time in responding to it & engaging with you :)

┗━━━

now, on to the yap. i deadass cracked my knuckles before typing all this out.

┏━━━

A/N > You’re so real for tht ngl

┗━━━

i reread the entirety of TFL from chapter 1 and my brain is so melted from analyzing that i'll prob find more details tomorrow after i sleep on some theories 😭 BUT HOLY FUCK YOU REALLY WEREN'T KIDDING WHEN YOU SAID YOU WERE HINTING AT GOJO'S OBSESSION SINCE LITERALLY THE FIRST CHAPTER??? the fucking hint being that "Gojo's desire for you is so strong it's almost frightening." GIRLLLLLL 🫵🫵🫵🫵🫵🫵

your foreshadowing and referencing is insane. idk if you intended a lot of it, but a lot of it caught my eye.

┏━━━

A/N> I TOLD YOU GUYS IVE BEEN DOIN IT SINCE THE FIRST CHAPTER !! Okay not exactly but like there was a vibe I had from the first chapter & when I later came up with the twist & went back and saw that everything would connect perfectly ^.^

┗━━━

chapter 7; the reader and Gojo have lighthearted banter about how the reader "started this" situation.

"I made a mistake." [reader] 

"A good one." 

"Bad one." You correct.

this was regarding a completely different situation but it baffled me how much it connects to the plot itself; the reader making the "mistake" of leaving her door open, and how it lead to months full of trauma and love. probably completely unintentional, but such a good detail.

┏━━━

A/N > Very intentional btw, it’s supposed to be known that, in a sense, Gojo x reader is forbidden :)

┗━━━

Choso's still staring at you intently, "What version of you would someone not like?" 

The way he words his question only furthers that little feeling in your chest. It's almost as though he were implying that any and all versions of you would be acceptable in his eyes. - Chapter 16

THE WAY WE SHOULD HAVE KNOWN THAT CHOSO WOULD STICK BY US REGARDLESSSSSSSS AAAAAA WE'RE SO BLIND!!! i just hope this stays true to the sequel :')

"No, I wish you didn't have to hate me." He says, shutting his eyes again and sucking in a deep breath, "B-But... it's uh, It's okay. I can live with you hating me." - Chapter 21

AAAA WE SHOULD HAVE KNOWN!!!! WE SHOULD HAVE KNOWN THIS WAS FORESHADOWING OUR FUTURE WITHOUT GOJO 😭😭😭 how he can live with the idea of the reader hating him so long as she's happy with Choso, especially considering his later revelations of how twisted his actions were and how if you stuck with him, he'd view you differently. fuck.

You despise the fact that he loves you. To you, it's almost entitled for him to feel like he has that right. How dare he hold such a strong emotion for you? If he felt this way, why is he forcing you to sleep with people for him? It makes no sense. 

Why would someone claim to love you and put you through so much? 

If he's been in love with you all this time, why start the list in the first place? Why couldn't he have just tried to win your heart from the beginning? Why the list? Why the blackmail? You don't understand him. - Chapter 23

i'm crushed. we didn't understand because we didn't know that Sukuna was involved. that could mean a million other things. i have some far-fetched theories about this but hear me out later!!!

the entirety of chapter 23 had me fucking floored while i was rereading. THE FORESHADOWING WAS EVERYWHERE!!! EVERY FUCKING WHERE

"No sweetheart, Sukuna's an asshole but..." His expression flickers and his smile fades away. He swallows and then clears his throat, "I'm pretty sure he'll satisfy you just fine." 

...

You narrow your eyes at him, "Are you sure?" 

...

 "Fuckin' positive," Gojo suddenly sounds pissed and you grow concerned. The arm around you gets a little tighter while he walks you through some crowds and you keep looking at the man confused. 

There's a vein popping out along his jawline because of how hard he's gritting his teeth.

of course he's aggravated because he knows that Sukuna is the one behind the list in the first place 😭😭😭 I'M SORRY WE DOUBTED YOU SATORU, FUCKKKK

——FIFTEEN MINUTES. That was the exact amount of time it took you to seduce Sukuna. The act was way too easy. Actually, it was suspiciously easy.

BECAUSE HE FUCKING KNEW 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

"What all did you plan on doing tonight aside from getting harassed by strangers?" Sukuna suddenly questions against your skin. 

You ignore how close he is and the way his lips make you tense, turning your head to face forward. Chuckling at his last comment, "Same thing as everyone else here." You reply, slightly confused by his question. 

"Bullshit," He utters, "Nobody dresses like this without the intent of gaining my attention," Sukuna claims while his hands slide back down along your body.

this 100% could be just him being cocky and Sukuna, but the recent reveal just makes this feel like an extra demeaning interaction. but of course, it's Sukuna.

chapter 24 is so fucking shady too with everything we know. i know you addressed some of these points already bc i brought them up in previous anon messages, but these things still had me paranoid;

the way Sukuna leaves us and tells the reader to go to his room after a certain amount of time (i know he could have just been tidying up real quick but everything about this man has me on edge)

┏━━━

A/N> A lot of people are on edge about this but I’ll be honest, there’s nothing crazy that happens in between this time period. Not saying nothing happens but nothing crazy— it’ll be addressed later (in the next fic most likely)

┗━━━

the way he's been consistently on the phone since the reader entered the room, which is shortly after she messaged Gojo saying that she'll be able to cross Sukuna off of this list by tonight which he wasn't happy with at all.

no seriously, he kept diverting his attention to something in the bathroom and then came out, still on his phone. maybe he's talking to literally anyone else but STILL I'M PARANOID

┏━━━

A/N> This is to show the fact that Sukuna is a very socially active individual, & hints to the theory (I think you later state) that he has connections.

┗━━━

this happens in chapter 25 but the way he keeps smiling while the reader kisses him is just so smug of him especially considering the original reason as to why the reader's even interacting with him

then the spicy chapters with Sukuna…

the foreshadowing that the lack of knowledge of Sukuna's reputation will come back to bite her in the ass; first with the knowledge that he is abusive, and then her finding out that he is the curator of the list, knowing the full details of her blackmail and even threatening her again.

WHO DID HE FUCKING FIGHT HELPPPPP MY MIND IS BOGGLING there's no way it's Gojo, right? they're both too unscathed in these next few chapters for there to have been a fight between the two of them.

┏━━━

A/N > It’s not Gojo. 🙏

┗━━━

THE FUCKING MOMENT WHERE HE CONTEMPLATED SOMETHING WITH THE PHONE IN HIS HAND??? I FUCKING KNEW IT. I FUCKING CALLED IT WAS SOMETHING SHADY AS HELL.

┏━━━

A/N> The other Sukuna hint I was talking about is right before this moment btw, you’re welcome ;)

┗━━━

then he has the audacity to hold his tongue right afterwards?? it's such a big hint towards the fact that he knew about the list from the beginning UGHHHHHHHH.

the way he tried to humor the reader about her "job" even though he was in on the whole thing. UGH. SUKUNA WHEN I GET YOU SUKUNA?? 👊👊👊👊 especially with that "whore" joke right afterwards. i can't stand him. i know that it's implied that he has a twisted view on women from having abusive women in his life (his mom and his ex who he punched) BUT STILL. he's so lucky he's fictional and hot.

the fact that we're able to pick up on the fact that it's a "crazy coincidence" that he continues the whore jokes UGHHHHH HE HAS BEEN PLAYING US FROM THE STAAAAAARTT

Gojo got upset at something from Sukuna's party, he didn't want you to call yourself a whore all of a sudden, Sukuna seems to have believed that was your actual job, and you remember how pissed Gojo seemed as he thought about you sleeping with Sukuna- 

Holy fuck. Are the two connected somehow? Is something going on? What does Gojo owe Sukuna? Does Sukuna know you only slept with him as payment to clear Gojo's debt? Is-

GIRL YOU WERE ALMOST THERE!!!! YOU ALMOST HAD IT!!!

┏━━━

A/N > I love teasing in my narration by nearly spoiling things 😹

┗━━━

---

seriously though, these chapters killed me. the official end obliterated my heart. it's so fucking bittersweet i want to scream at the top of a high building. the reader ends up happy and with someone she loves, which is fantastic for her. she deserves that after everything she went through. Choso treats her so, so well.

but Gojo. with the theories i have, i feel horrible. i was so harsh towards him as a die hard Choso girly but these endings changed me. i just hope i'm right.

the fact that his healing journey is harsher than ours makes this ending sting so much. he's healed, and you can see it with his demeanor from the call and the way he interacted with the reader.

we were always made aware of the way he looked at us such deep attachment. the initial gleam shows that he's happy to see us, but that he's not reliant on us for his happiness anymore. he's finding that on his own, and it's a grueling process for him. i wished the reader gave him a hug, but that would probably make me feel even worse.

┏━━━

A/N> He gave her a lil side hug (with his arm over her shoulder) & was resting his head on hers at the end if that makes you feel any better 😅

┗━━━

"Through my blackmailing, I fell for you but I also did it because I loved you from the start." i'm gonna throw up bro i'm so sad. i'm proud of his growth. his obsession was so, so strong but he always prioritized the reader's happiness over himself. i know that being self-sacrificial is so core to his personality but it doesn't make it suck any less. i'm devastated. i started blasting mitski in the car on my way to work after reading this.

i thought i was ready for the journal burning. i was so ready for this tie to be severed, for them to finally move on. but i failed to realize that it could ultimately mean a life without each other. it makes sense as to why, but it still sucks.

kami i need that poly ending before i cry my eyes out at 4 am rn. you know i can't handle angst, but bittersweet endings lowkey hurt me even more. i need all my babies to be happy. i desperately need it.

but that alt ending... fuck. in a horrible, sick, and twisted way, i'm relieved. i'm a Choso girly from the bottom of my heart but i can't let this Gojo go omfg. even if he shows up for one more chapter, i think i'll be alright. BUT IT BETTER NOT BE FOR DEATH KAMI!!!! I HAVE A FEW EXCERPTS THAT SUGGEST DEATH FLAGS BUT I AM SIMPLY NOT LOOKING AT THEM. DON'T DO THIS TO ME KAMIIIIIII. i need this boy to be frolicking in a field of flowers or something. my heart can't take this.

┏━━━

A/N> I know I reference death a lot but that’s just to add a sense of how dramatic the characters are 🫶

┗━━━

---

okay, time for my mind-fucky theory. pls bare with me. if it wasn't obvious by my last post, i'm 100% on board with the theory that Sukuna's blackmailing Gojo, which started this whole thing. but the thing that is getting me is how this all connects. i have some assumptions that could make sense, but there are a handful of gaps. here's my thought process;

Sukuna's blackmailing Gojo by using his obsession/love against him.

we are already familiar with the fact that Gojo has liked the reader for years. there was a chapter where Gojo mentioned that it started off as a "crush" but he was so oblivious to his own obsession up until the reader mentioned it to him. it's to the point that he didn't understand what was wrong with the idea of hurting people for the reader. who's to say that Sukuna didn't catch him in some sort of heinous act regarding the reader like stalking?

┏━━━

A/N > You’re cooking with this one and I almost, almost had to go get the fire extinguisher :D

┗━━━

Gojo didn't understand the difference between love and obsession until later on in the story. this would be consistent with the implication that Gojo just loved her so deeply that his morals were askew as we have yet to find out how far his love goes.

what if Sukuna caught him in the act of doing god knows what, and brought up the fact that if the reader found out about this, that she'd get super freaked out and would do everything she can to get away from him (considering probably barely knew each other, if at all, at this point). but why would Sukuna devise such a plan over a money bribe? well, Sukuna's already revealed to be wealthy, and maybe he was bored. the same line that Gojo kept repeating to the reader whenever she questioned him as to why he did it. what if Gojo asked Sukuna why he's blackmailing him, and he said the exact same thing; "I was bored." we see how much Sukuna mirrors Gojo's speech by calling the reader "sweetheart" often, what if Gojo did the same thing? 

┏━━━

A/N > Gojo & Sukuna do have a few parallels in this story & they will be addressed more in the sequel.

┗━━━

we wondered in chapter 23 how Gojo reaches out to these men to ensure their debt is "paid," but considering how oblivious everyone else on the list is to Gojo owing them anything, it would make sense that he only reports to Sukuna as he is ordered to do so. but two things stumped me on this theory overall.

the reader said that she used to party a lot and get involved with boys before Gojo. if he was stalking her for so long, why did he wait so long to approach her?

what specifically would be the blackmail that Sukuna has on Gojo?

regarding the first point, it's been mentioned that Gojo has been "scared of women" and was shy when it came to approaching the reader. he knew of her for so long, but was able to constantly slip under her radar. considering how much of a pervert he is, it wouldn't have been surprising for him to sneak around and watch in on the reader hooking up with other guys. after all, these guys were probably complete strangers to him and all he cared about was you. remember how Gojo was basically able to tune out his own best friend, Suguru, when the reader was hooking up with him in their living room? it wouldn't be wild to assume that he was able to do the same for your other hookups as he spied on you.

to connect this with second point, what if Sukuna caught Gojo being a peeping tom on the reader during a party hook-up? while being so distracted in the act of spying, Sukuna spots him. the reader wouldn't be alright with the fact that someone who's barely an acquaintance (if that, depending on the time this occurred) to her has been perving around and watching her have sex without her consent. she would do anything to get away from Gojo, and of course that would crush him. Gojo tried to buy Sukuna's silence by any means necessary. so, Sukuna generated a list of people that he and Gojo mutually knew for the reader to fuck. the reasoning for it would be the fact that Gojo has to sit through the process of having the girl he likes fuck a bunch of guys besides him, and the fact that Gojo knew all these men would make it sting more. plus, he has a reputation for hookups. (chapter 8)

┏━━━

A/N > You’re like RIGHT there with it and yet not there at the same time omg 😟

┗━━━

but why would Gojo agree to this deal with Sukuna, and why would he also go with the method of blackmailing the reader? it's basically a guarantee that the reader would be scared away regardless. but again, we could recall that Shoko mentioned that he was too "scared of women" to approach the reader at first. this was his chance to finally approach her. plus, "once that video is gone, there is no excuse he'll have to be around you." (chapter 8)

---

but the more i thought of this reasoning for the two points, the more bizarre it felt. so what if instead of Gojo being a peeping tom, it was Sukuna. we get so many hints that Sukuna has eyes and intel everywhere. we get an indirect implication of this when he called us out for rolling our eyes during our phone call with him. yes, it could be completely by chance, but it's still a great hint that he "sees everything" and "knows everything." we get an even bigger hint towards this in the alt ending when he directly references The F*ck List.

┏━━━

A/N > Others have taken note of how Sukuna knew she rolled her eyes but trust me, that’s just to show that Sukuna knows the reader’s body language more than he’s let on & paid attention to her a lot during the time they were together. 

┗━━━

it wouldn't be too far fetched to assume that he has some shady videos taken of people without his consent, some possibly acquired through other people (like how Gojo was revealed to have sent Sukuna the video of the reader from the first chapter). what if Gojo caught Sukuna with the video, threatened him to delete it, and Sukuna counterthreatened to have it be sent and posted everywhere. it would be highly ironic, but consistent with the way that Gojo and Sukuna practically mirror each other at times. the reasoning for the list choices would still be the same for this theory, too.

---

my citations for these theories ☝️🤓

“You once asked me if I love you because I blackmailed you or if I blackmailed you because I love you and my answer is both,” Gojo confesses as he turns to meet your gaze, “Through my blackmailing, I fell for you but I also did it because I loved you from the start.” - Chapter 56

loved you from the start; his obsession has been consistent from the start (supports Gojo being a peeping tom theory) or he has always had a deep concern for you (supports him wanting to stop Sukuna from spreading blackmail of you instead).

“I’ve sacrificed everything for you, y’know.” 

“How? What’s everything that you’ve sacrificed, hm?” 

“You. I sacrificed the woman I love to make her happy.” Gojo admits, and of all he’s said thus far, that feels like the truest statement. 

“I could’ve been happy with you.” You remind him. 

He laughs, “Yeah well, I’m an idiot.” 

You scoff, “That’s all you have to say?” 

“Yup.” - Chapter 56

is he an idiot for being a peeping pervert instead of just approaching you normally? maybe. how does this make her happy? she ends up finding love through Choso, through the list, through the blackmail.

But deleting the video means ... he has no more leverage over you and can't force you to help him with the hole he's dug for himself. -  Chapter 8

the hole being the blackmail set against him by Sukuna.

Gojo's behind you cursing at himself for being unable to tell you the truth. 

He's so scared that you'll never help him without the blackmail and, well, he has every right to be because you're pretty sure that if it weren't for those videos he has over your head, you wouldn't be doing any of this. - Chapter 9

the videos he's referencing is the original video from chapter 1 and the fake video he lied about with Suguru, but he can't tell the reader the truth because it's too twisted and risky (supports Gojo peeping tom theory).

He silences himself in thought. There are so many ways he could go about answering such a question but the possibilities of how you may react are endless. Plus, you're drunk and if he's going to admit or explain anything to you, it'll be while you're sober. 

"Because..." Gojo's voice gets so quiet that you almost don't catch what he says, "...I don't have any other choice." - Chapter 21

if he didn't go through with his list, Sukuna would have went through with Gojo's blackmail, thus resulting in either you getting as far away from Gojo as soon as possible or Sukuna's video being sent around.

He let something slip abruptly, "W-Wish I c-could tell you everything, sweets..." 

Your brows furrow at that. 

Are you missing something here? - Chapter 22

YES GIRL!!!! SUKUNA'S BEHIND THE WHOLE LIST, HE'S BEHIND THE BLACKMAIL GIRLYPOP

"Anything," Gojo says, meeting your gaze. He's so serious that it's almost dark the way he looks at you, "I'd do anything for you." - Chapter 29

"I meant it when I said I'd do anything for you." 

You follow his motions and then end up right back in his arms, "Right..." 

"I'd sacrifice the very thing I love just to see you happy." Gojo claims proudly. 

You scoff, "Thought' I was the thing you loved?" 

"You are." 

His words bewilder you, "Then that makes no sense." 

"It won't." Gojo shrugs. - Chapter 29

🧍‍♀️

anything. even if it means putting your body, heart, mind, and career on the line. directly supports the theory that Sukuna initially had blackmail on the reader.

"We're the same, y'know..." He suddenly says, his voice breaking again, "We both want someone so terribly bad but our situations prohibit us from getting that person." 

"You could've prevented all this though..." 

Gojo sniffles and you feel a drop of wetness slide down his cheek and slip against your palm. The man was crying? Why? - Chapter 30

this whole time we've been told that Gojo and the reader share more similarities than the reader realizes. what Gojo is to the reader, the reader is to Choso. while Choso now knows of the men that the reader slept with, he doesn't know why. he doesn't know about you being blackmailed. you know that you had to sleep with these men. you don't know why. you didn't know it was because of Gojo being blackmailed.

"For loving me, Satoru. It's not a crime," You say, mocking a comment he made to you earlier, "You're allowed to love me. So, for that, and that only, I forgive you." 

Those words healed so many more wounds in his heart than you realized. It was like that was all he ever needed to hear. If Gojo's mistake was loving you and that's what caused this, then you forgive him. 

If in some twisted way, his feelings started the list, you forgive him.

COME ON NOW.

There’s so much going unspoken but the two of you knew what either was saying, you understood each other more than either of you realized. - Chapter 35

“Well,” Gojo sighs heavily and then draws your hands off his face, leaning down to you a bit, “Sometimes, sacrifices need to be made in exchange for one’s happiness.” 

“Are you telling me that all this was for the greater good?” You quiz as you raise a curious brow. 

“Something like that, yeah,” He shrugs. - Chapter 45

You tell him, “If I had one wish, it’d be that you did that from the beginning.” 

Gojo opens his mouth to say something but then he swallows his words down. He nearly fucked up. 

“All you had to do was talk to me,” Your shoulders raise into a shrug as you move a hand to the doorknob, “Things could’ve been different if you did.” 

“Even if I’ve been obsessed with you since the beginning?” He questions and he’s stepping closer to you again. He can’t possibly wrap his head around that possibility- 

You laugh a bit, “Especially if you were obsessed from the beginning,” You didn’t know it but that statement right there made the man feel as though his world was falling apart, loads of regret tumbling over him as he stares at you with wide eyes, “Satoru I think you forgot but, before all this started, aside from Shoko… I was lonely.” 

Gojo’s throat goes dry and he fails to form a response to that, “I…” 

“If you had just talked to me one time, and more than a hey or how are you,” The way your eyes soften, a slim sheer gloss of tears coating your gaze as you speak to him, “I would’ve fallen for you.” 

He grits his teeth, “Don’t tell me that.” 

“But it’s true.” You say. 

And just like that, Gojo was crumbling all over again. If only you knew how much he regretted everything after hearing you say that. - Chapter 46

if he had just spoke to the reader before all of this, maybe she wouldn't have gone to those parties, hooked up with those people, and caused whatever kind of blackmail Sukuna had on Gojo (or on her).

He wishes he could take it all back, his feelings for you included. If only he could go back and stop himself from ever being curious about you. That’s what started it after all. Because, at the end of the day, Gojo knew who you were before you knew who he was— hell, even before Shoko knew who you were. - Chapter 53

then what is the timeline of his obsession starting? has it been before Gojo? could his blackmail have taken place even before Shoko introduced you two, adding to the weight of the threat that Sukuna held over Gojo's head (regarding the peeping tom theory).

┏━━━

A/N > The timeline on Gojo’s interest, not obsession just yet, on the reader will be addressed in the sequel so this’ll be answered there <3

┗━━━

---

but there were certain parts that stumped me and my theories so i have some weird reasonings around them;

It's selfish of him and seriously fucked up but, he's said it before and he'll say it over and over again-- you're all he has. He made promises to everyone on that list, promises of delivering a woman to them at some point, and of course, he couldn't convince anyone he knew to do such a thing. 

So again, the situation with you just happened to be a coincidence. 

The problem is that Gojo hates that it's you. He hates that you're the one he ended up doing this to. - Chapter 8

Gojo's known to be a silly guy so it could make sense that he actually did promise these guys hookups for reasons unrelated to his blackmail. after all, he does have a reputation for getting people hookups. the coincidence is that Sukuna now has dirt on Gojo and wants to toy with him. by making the reader sleep with them the guys he coincidentally owes hookups to, he fulfills his role/reputation and relieves his debt at the same time. two birds, one stone.

┏━━━

A/N > As we later learn that some of the “debt” Satoru claimed to have isn’t real, we can also infer that his reputation & the promises he’s made to these men were done out of coincidence. Take Toji for example; tell me you can’t see an interaction between him & Gojo where Gojo gets a bad grade and wants to get it up so he taunts his professor with the idea of getting him a hookup & Toji would laugh it off considering Gojo’s reputation ;)

┗━━━

another thing that stumped me is why Gojo got so worked up with the reader referring herself as a whore, and the connection to Sukuna. my delulu reasoning is that once Sukuna threatened Gojo with blackmail by either of the two theories/methods i mentioned, Sukuna casually referred to the reader as a whore. that caused a major fight between the two, possibly even getting physical (which can refer back to the implication that Gojo has hurt people for the reader).

the fight could have increased the tension and severity of the situation, so Sukuna decides to add Choso to the list knowing how easily attached Choso gets. in chapter 5, the reader and Gojo were discussing the list and Choso specifically. Gojo was even noted to be relieved when the reader had mentioned that they'll just have to hope that Choso doesn't get attached, as he obviously holds deep feelings for the reader. Sukuna knows that by going through with the blackmail with Choso involved, Gojo most likely will not end up with the reader if Choso get attached and the reader reciprocates those feelings.

also, the counterargument that Sukuna and Gojo are actually friends/allies in this situation just doesn't sit well with me. it would make for a crazy twist but it just feels too out of character for Gojo. but then again, how would Sukuna specifically know about The F*ck List? but idk, it just feels so wrong to me. maybe i have too much faith in Gojo lmfao. after all, he has consistently shown a great dislike towards the guy since chapter 23. but maybe it's my denial speaking. i really don't want to think of Satoru going through this whole arc only for it to reveal that he truly is a piece of shit. pls don't do this to my pookie my heart cannot handle it </3

┏━━━

A/N > Remember, Gojo is a good actor & you go a long period of time in the book not realizing he’s not as much of a villain as he pretends to be 😉 

┗━━━

there's that moment after the reader fucked Sukuna that still messes with my brain. with my theories, my brain's thinking that he contemplated on collecting even more blackmail on the reader. for what reason? idk, to be an ass? to torment Gojo further and add more to his blackmail? but maybe he decided not to because he already has plenty of blackmail on the reader (if the theory of Sukuna having a video of her from way back then is true) and fucking her knowingly made Gojo pissed considering all the dirt Sukuna has.

so why can't Gojo tell her the truth now? why does he want to wait years in advance? maybe he's hoping that by that time, not only will you forget and not care about the situation overall, but maybe Sukuna will forget all about it as well. the chances of Sukuna holding on to the reader's blackmail for that long is slim and the reader would most likely be in a situation where she is completely separated from Sukuna depending on her job and living situation with Choso. the stakes are lower than if he were to reveal everything to you now, at a moment where your life is still so uncertain. it would go against his wish for you to end up happy.

┏━━━

A/N > Maybe Gojo doesn’t tell her the truth because he can’t, just as he said 🌚 Perhaps he’s not allowed to yet. After all, why would Sukuna even tell the reader he made the list in the end? ^.^ Just some food for thought!

┗━━━

---

regarding the future of TFL... fuck, bro. i have no fucking idea. i'm too caught up in the (presumed) past. i'm mourning fr. i love this fic sooooo fucking much. whenever you decide to pick up on the sequel, i will be there. if you choose to publish anything else in the meantime, i will be there. thanks for such a fun and memorable read, Kami. i'm excited to bookbind this soon 🤍🤍🤍 now, i need to watch blue lock to shove these feelings down.

yap fin (for now)

-☃️

A/N > I love you sosoosooooo much for this. These theories are like reading an entirely new fanfic sometimes except, I know all the answers & what’s going to happen next, which only makes me more excited ^.^ Thank you for taking the time to make this, thank you for reading, thank you for supporting, just, THANK YOU.

This right here is exactly what I write for; people like you :)

To the others reading this breakdown & theory, thank ☃️anon because she’s a damn godsend & ilhsm ^.^ (definitely showing favoritism rn, sorry not sorry, ily all I swear)

Edit; Since you’re watching Blue Lock, I can’t wait to bring my Shidou fanfic here because a lot of the drama in TFL has inspo from that fic, which I wrote first ^.^ & I could totally see you enjoying it because not only is it a childhood friends to lovers than enemies & back to lovers troupe BUT it also includes Itoshi Sae x reader which ofc, adds hella drama :))

P.S. It’s two am as I finally post this and omg sorry it took me a while, I wanted to answer other anons first before unpacking this badboy, again, tysm!!

[rustic-space-fiddle]

Things I love about EPIC: The Musical

Greek mythology hehehehehhehe (my weakness)

Little Ajax

The slightly different styles in each segment but the overarching cohesiveness

The crew singing choral vocals for Odysseus

POLITES *screaming crying throwing up*

The crew introducing Eurylochus but Odysseus introducing Polites

Odysseus’s ‘Ha ha HA Haaaaa!” What a smug lil $h!*

His whole description of Athena ~ fanboy energy

“Bestest of friends(?)!” “Okay chill kid” ”okay :D”

Polites definitely almost knocking himself out with lotus before Odysseus definitely takes it away like “oh honey no”

POLITES *STILL CRYING AND THROWING UP*

The RUMBBBBLING BOOOOOMS when Polyphemus enters—WOOO YOU CAN FEEL THE FEAR IN HIS FOOTSTEPS (also: heartbeats!)

I’m not a musically intelligent person so forgive me but the way the “take from you like you took from me / gift from you and a gift from me” sounds just makes my brain so happy

If music is math then that is definitely some solid well done math

“Nooooooobody, noooooooooobody, noo~ooOOOOOOOOOOOOH~bodyyyyyy”

“WATCH OUUUUUT!” *AGGRESSIVE CHORUS*

“My brothers-!” yall I’m gonna freakin cry

The visceral death sounds when the club comes out

Polyphemus’s voice slowing like a giant robot powering down to show him falling asleep

The sound slowly fading in as Odysseus takes in the death around him (I imagine he’s looking at the remains of Polites)

The sound Athena makes whenever she appears or disappears (NOTICE SHE DOESNT MAKE THAT SOUND WHEN SHE LEAVES FOR THE LAST TIME! just empty wind…)

“HEY CYCLOPS!”

“The next time that you dare choose not to spare, remember them.” UGH BEAUTIFUL

The growl in “REMEMBER ME.”

Ship sounds!

The entirety of “My Goodbye”. It’s just such a good argument song and I love it so much.

Odysseus’s angry “HEY.” when Athena basically blames the death of his friends on his kindness.

The fact that Odysseus isn’t afraid to absolutely WRECK Athena verbally? She has definitely killed and turned people into spiders for less

You can tell he felt a little bad about it and that she actually was kinda hurt by it too (silence is a heckuva tool)

“Aim for the island in the sky” oh yeah I’m listening to a Greek myth wHEEEZE

Eurylochus slowly getting on Odysseus’s nerves till he literally has to pull him aside and tell him to stfu

No but actually Eurylochus is not being a real one rn he is not being helpful

The wind god ( *0v0*)

“Why are my eyes and my heart and my soul so heavy?” WOW OKAY DANG

Poseidon’s entrance — DANG SON THE POWER OF THE SEA IS PALPABLE

“Ruthlessness is mercy—DIE.”

The crew calling for their captain as they’re taken by the sea

THE AUDACITY OF POSEIDON TO REMIND ODYSSEUS OF HIS OWN WORD—“when does a ripple become a tidal wave/ when does a man become a monster”—DURING THIS CRISIS. WHAT A PETTY JERK (do it again)

Eurylochus try to confess and Odysseus refusing to let him. There three reasons I think this is: 1) he doesn’t know why he wants to confess but he literally does not have time for his #2 to be having a moment rn. 2) he knows what Eurylochus did and is choosing to keep him quiet because he needs the crew not to dwell on this/he’s trying not to punch him in the face. 3) he knows what he did and he’s saying “stfu” as a way of forgiveness. All of these are great options imo

“We couldn’t resist!” “What was it?” “A woman!” “…w h a t. -_-“ my man is fed up rn

“We have to save them!” “NO WE DON’T” EURYLOCHUS WTF IS WRONG W YOU BRO

Hermes’s insane laugh !!!! LOVE

Hermes’s entire song

Rhyming “Be hurt” with “beat her” BRAIN SO HAPPY

Someofthamagic~ BRAIN SO HAPPY AGH

The fight between Odysseus and Circe~ so evenly matched! Wits, power, but she beat him! She beat him even though he didn’t cave.

“I dug the root up w my bare hands!” “Hermes gave it to you didn’t he” “…okay fine yes but rGARDLESS—“

The fact that Odysseus calls Penelope his power

Circe’s empathetic sigh because she’s not a monster, she’s a protector, and her heart has been touched by Odysseus’s earnestness and love for his wife and for his brothers

HER OUTRO WAHHHHHHH

[mixelation]

i will also share with u the absurd toxicity (reborn au au (tm)) rpf lore developed with @waffliesinyoface

point one: obito would not be naturally drawn to fandom, but he IS a troll who likes absurd things, and it's important to him to know what's up with the people in his life. he has read the entirety of icha icha (more than once!) for the simple pleasure of sniping kakashi with a well-placed reference. when tori gets fixated on ninja rpf, he also obviously starts reading it so he can have fuel to tease her.

unlike kakashi's brand of obsession (which is PRIVATE, obito, WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS), tori's obsessions crave interaction. you want to talk rpf with her? she is going to drag you down into a terrible vortex of rpf fixations

obviously "driven to making insane decisions for petty reasons" tori is obito's favorite tori. he is SO supportive of her ongoing war against the sasori girls.

obvious outcome of point one: obito becomes a kakashi girl

tori is SO supportive of his psychosexual kakashi obsession. she thinks him working through his feelings like this is good for him. also she likes reading fic

obito is not well-liked in kakashi fan circles when he's writing in under a pen name because he keeps writing kakashi as a damsel in distress in constant need of rescuing due to chakra exhaustion. fangirls hate this because kakashi should be cool and badass all of the time???

point two (horrible realization): in this au, obito retains his uchiha pretty privilege. he's also the infamous loose canon of the yellow flash's students. there's ABSOLUTELY insane fic about him

obito's favorite ship is obviously him/kakashi, but NO ONE writes it right???

yes he and tori are dating. no she doesn't care he keeps looking up kakashi/him. she knows what she signed up for.

in fact, tori inspires him!! if tori can go hunt down a random sasori rpf writer to argue with her, OBVIOUSLY he can go have a converastion with some obito writers and gently push them in the right direction!!

but he has to do it cool and mysterious, see, so they get him. he shows up in the dead of night in his super dramatic madara personality. he just wants to talk. he gives a dramatic speech and throws in some killing intent for Effect

obvious outcome of point two: everyone stops writing obito fic because they're terrified.

tori: realizes there's still READERS for obito fic but no writers

tori: that's free real estate

she's converting. she's an obito girl now. (obito: babe that's SO sweet of you)

NO ONE likes her obito fics either because she writes him as a deeply pathetic whackjob who cries during sex. she gets multiple replies that are like "when will obito show up to murder THIS writer"

instead of being normal she's like "FYI he DID show up in my bedroom but that won't stop me because I AM NOT A COWARD"

third, miscellaneous point: obito is shunned by fandom when he's a faceless person writing in. at in person meet-ups, people love him despite his rancid opinions because he is hot. :'(

tori: PUT THE MASK BACK ON I HATE THIS

obito in kakashi cosplay??? with kakashi's real clothes he stole???

i thought about writing a joke about them going to an in-person fic exchange and people not realizing they're together to mirror the ANBU Party Debacle. however i do not think this is the mood for Torito because they cannot physically resist bothering each other for more than 90 seconds at a time. obito shows up holding her hand so he can swing their arms like literal children. if he doesn't pay attention to her for long enough, tori WILL tug his hair/loose clothing/etc. he attempts to sit in her lap at least twice. they're both super into the other person's rancid headcanons. they are so fucking obnoxious

no one ever matches obito-in-person with obito-showing-up-to-harass-fic-writers because of the insanely different personalities

people are okay with obito in person despite his personality because he is. hot. and a man. and they're a group of mostly women who are attracted to men. do you see? but they still fucking hate tori

a rumor starts that the reason tori can write bonkers obito fic without him murdering her is that when he showed up to threaten her over it, she slept with him. so not only is she annoying, but she cheated on her hot boyfriend (obito) with famous ninja uchiha obito! she doesn't deserve either of them!!!

(obito: that's exactly what happened tho. i gave you my super cool and scary "write better fanfic" speech and you slept with me. <3 / tori, who will never EVER admit she found his stupid "madara" personality kind of hot: (tea kettle noises))

[literary-illuminati]

Book Review 13 – A Memory Called Empire by Arkady Martine

Okay, getting back into writing these reviews before I fall so far behind that catching up is just impossible. Memory is the first book this year that I’ve actually read before; I’m rereading as the first choice for a theoretical book club with some friends. Honestly quite enjoyed the experience, if only because trying to jot down some things to say when discussing it forced me to take it a little slower this time.

To get the technical details out of the way – the book won the Hugo, and did basically deserve it. The writing’s lovely and occasionally downright poetics, the two leads are both insanely compelling, and the court intrigue is appropriately convoluted and byzantine for what is obviously Constantinople IN SPACE. It’s just overall a joyous read.

So Martine’s clearly very fascinated by the experience of having your standards of aesthetics, and sophistication, and civilization defined by a culture which has never even bothered to notice your existence. The simultaneous rapture at being in the heart of the universe that you’ve read about your entire life, and deep alienation knowing you’ll never actually be a part of it. How ever most of the people trying to be friendly and compliment you don’t even notice how patronizing they’re being. And so on and etc. Mahit’s internal monologue does a really good job of selling the ambivalence of it, especially in the party scene.

The book does an excellent job of actually selling the palace district as a site of imperial grandeur, too, every building buried in symbolic aesthetics and ritual significance. But also just, like, actually impressive and grand to read about. All the contrasts between the oveflowing abundance in the city and life on Lsel are fascinating too – Martine makes really good use of the little worldbuilding quotes at the start of chapters to sell the difference. The one that really stuck in my head was a quote from a tourism

guide explaining all the myriad fine dining choices for tourists visiting the City followed directly by a Lseli agricultural report about how new hydrophonic techniques had increased rice yield sufficiently to support a whole hundred non-replacement births in the next generation (it helps that all the Teixicalaanli food legitimately sounds pretty amazing). Though the time where Mahit’s internal monologue short circuited over the idea of carrying a pregnancy to term in your own body – wasteful! Depriving the station of a necessary laborer for months and months when perfectly good artificial wombs are right there! So decadent – is a close second.

Martine is, as I understand it, a Byzantinist, and oh boy can you tell. The city’s a little bit Tenochtitlan in the aesthetics and the religion, but it really is overwhelmingly space Constantinople. The theoretically absolute emperor dealing with mobs in the streets willing and potentially able to acclaim a usurper, the constant risk of legions doing the same, the basic fact that there’s a vast empire which is viewed as nothing but an adjunct or extension of the capital city which is the entirety of all political life and the place everyone whose anyone needs to be, and so on.

In a way, the obvious Byzantine-ness of the Teixicalaanli makes them seem less imperialist than just imperial, at least from Mahit’s perspective. Which is to say, well, first of all that ‘empire’ has far too many meanings and distinguishing them is hard, but the Teixicalaanli don’t expand like the British or French, in constant competition over captive markets and strategic locations, they don’t feel some glorious burden of manifest destination or a mission civilisatrice that requires universal dominion. They already are the universe, or at least everything worthwhile in it, they go to war like medieval kings or Roman princeps – to win glorious victories and so show the empire they have the right to rule it.

The relation between Lsel and Teixicalaan – well, if suffers from the standard space opera lack of scale, first of all. The stationers number in the tens of thousands – the empire must be in the hundreds of billions, minimum. ‘Realistically’ Six Directions would never have found out about the imago device because relations with them would have been handled by some mid-ranking provincial governor, only showing up in travelogues and fanciful ethnographies. But leaving that aside, Teixicalaanli myopia also means that the cultural imperialism that the book’s so fascinated by is oddly...blameless? Teixicalaan presumably has brutal campaigns dedicated to stamping out native cultures and integrating them into the empire, but there’s hardly one directed at Lsel. The general sense you get is one of vaguely tragic inevitability – that the mismatch in size and wealth is such that of course any sort of even slightly free exchange of media and ideas will lead to Stationer culture being overwhelmed. Makes me think about arguments around CanCon regulations.

(The whole Roman, medieval feel of the empire means it all kind of calls to mind various Germanic elites actively reaching for Roman iconography and institutions to legitimize themselves as much as anything, though of course that’s not really right.)

The book’s politics are, I think, a bit limited by the degree it’s laser-focused on the very uppermost tip of imperial society – the book seems to know this too, given the thirty page digression into cyberpunk two thirds of the way through (speaking of which, I absolutely adore the fact that the elegant, ritually harmonious and utterly aesthetic architecture lasts about three metro stops away from the palace before everything starts turning into economical concrete blocks). Which isn’t really a knock on the book, but I do think some of the praise of it does get a bit overblown; there’s a limit to how much insight you can really have on imperialism when you’re so focused on the stories an empire tells about itself in its most rarified and luxurious heart.

In much the same way there’s something very, I don’t know, ‘written in America in the late 2010s’ about the political imagination the book allows itself. There are people who don’t want the world to be the world, and maybe they can help a bit, but the actual players in the game of thrones are corrupt oligarchs and populist warmongers, you know?

All that said, the book sure does portray a city that views itself as synonymous with civilization. I only realized there was a Teixicalaanli word for foreigner that wasn’t ‘barbarian’ when one of the probably-terrorists made a point of using it during the whole cyberpunk interlude. Which retroactively makes, like, every single other Teixicalaanli character in the book waaaaay more of an asshole. (fanfic thought - Teixicalaanli attempts to talk even vaguely respectfully to/about foreigners as analogous to people trying to be gender neutral or talk about nonbinary people in really strongly genedered languages, right down to the awkward neologisms that the ‘average citizens’ rolls their eyes at. What’s the Teixicalaanli term for ‘the woke plague.’?)

Also – not really a better place to put this in, but something I really do like about the worldbuilding is that no one has anything like the same ideas of what constitutes political legitimacy as the contemporary liberal default? Lsel is a corporatist state, where political power is divided between what are basically guilds who seem to have wide remit to make policy within their jurisdiction, with only one seat on the council seeming to have any sort of election. And Teixicalaan is, of course, a bureacratic-verging-on-stratocratic monarchy, with a strong sense of popular involvement in government, but through demonstrations and rioting instead of any formal process. It’s enjoyable that neither place is actually, like, familiar.

The motor of the book’s plot is byzantine (or Byzantine, I suppose) court intrigue, and as someone who loves polite conversations and poetic allusions followed directly by assassination attempts, I adored it. That said, I’m going to be a slob demanding everything be hand fed to me for a minute and saying that it all got positively opaque by the end. Which is, I suppose, entirely realistic, given Mahit’s position and role in everything, but still I wanted an Agathe Christie drawing room denouncement so bad. Was Ten Pearl actively backing the coup? If not, what was up with the Sunlit? And the Cityshocks? Why was the Information Ministry so politically passive and uninvolved in a literal coup attempt? How was Eight Loop involved in the whole final resolution, given it was her people keeping the emperor safe but it was Nineteen Adze who was with him on camera? All these questions and more, unanswered and, probably, irrelevant! But like, inquiring minds want to know.

Though speaking of the coup, I really did absolutely adore how, like,incompetent and amateurish both coup attempts were? Which seems like it would be a plot hole, but actually it’s probably the strongest argument the book can make for Six Direction’s immortality plan – the empire has been peaceful for so long no one remembers how to do a coup.

Anyway, yes! Extremely good book, Mahit and Seagrass are absolutely great protagonists. Not at all sorry I’m peer pressuring people into reading it.

[narwhalandchill]

ok one thing i am Absolutely certain of is that something is Up with misha and im far from the only one

the fact that literally No character acknowledges his presence beyond us and clockie (who, mind you, isnt seen by anyone else either). how his dialogue as a visitor to the express has him likening it to feeling the way "home" does. the fucking keyhole eyes and the keyhole door motifs in the dreamscape Especially a childs dream (and whos a child in the penacony cast???)

and just honest to fuck the ENTIRETY of a childs dream like. mikhail. when misha is a diminutive of the name. the voices you hear during the story segment in the map DEFINITELY include mishas. they describe it as a dream that is created from the memories of a child yet its also the map that contains the most references to the watchmaker including that room which seems like his workshop or sth??

his interest in the astral express and the new gacha destruction LC literally depicting him receiving a ticket to the express (from his grandpa too whos prolly the mikhail n also the watchmaker) combined with the fact our invitation to penacony was using the EXPRESS distress call genuinely makes me feel like it could be him behind that hidden message

n then i just saw a comment that wondered whether hes the fucking nilou to penaconys "dream". and like. it would be so fucking wild but also adds up so well?? Or maybe im insane but listen.

penaconys dream is falling apart its sinking back into the depths of a much more chaotic, dangerous memory space. the way the dream samsara in genshin 2.0 story worked was that it depended on the "dreamer" never becoming aware of the fact that theyre dreaming. and what question does the distress call slash invitation carry? one thats pondering the meaning of dreaming. one that i can VERY well believe to be coming from someone whos literally been dreaming for aeons know How long slowly becoming aware and asking Why. Why does life slumber?

if misha has been created as or made into the lynchpin of penaconys dream holding it all together but for some reason has begun rousing from his slumber and gotten close enough to awareness that he IS dreaming that its beginning to affect the stability of the dreamscape. and he has some sort of vague memories (or maybe inherited ones thru his 'grandpa' who might well be just the watchmaker that Created him) of the express. wouldnt it make complete sense for the first thing in his mind to call for the express?

and even things like "death" too? if misha is the dreamer and waking up and hes fucking terrified and confused and disoriented. Yet its still his dream that makes up the entirety of the dreamscape. its not at all unrealistic on the level of just the idea itself that his creeping existential dread of who he even is and if hes even real outside of this dream hes now been forced into being aware of. begins to take the shape of an actual death incarnate in the memory zone. bc isnt that what it is to discover you yourself might just be a part of a dream - and a dream that could fall apart any moment if you wake up. That he might be already dead - or never even have existed in reality at all. like sheesh kid id be spawning nightmarish horrors into my dreamscape too

then i also just rly feel like. the watchmaker equals a nameless equals mikhail equals mishas grandfather but also the creator of penaconys dream but also possibly either the creator of misha or maybe misha himself being not only a diminutive of mikhail in name but Literally . as in a fragment of the watchmaker left behind in the dreamscape as the dreamer holding it all together. the LITERAL watchmakers legacy. like hhhhhhhh i cant stop thinking about thiss

if aventurines trying to take back penacony for the IPC does it mean hes literally trying to wake misha up to destroy the dream (tho he might be unaware of this being the final step as of rn himself)?? and the familys interest is obviously in forcing the dreamer to slumber eternally. but the one thing neither party might foresee is misha himself taking action too. which hes Already done if it was him behind those invites too

+ acherons comments when u first meet her? about the dream being doomed to fall apart in the end. it feels prophetic. ppl have theorized shes an emanator of terminus the finality which could mean she experiences linear time in reverse the same as her aeon. literally traveling from the end to the beginning in a predestined path. so if thats true then its almost guaranteed she wasnt making a hypothetical comment about the dream being destroyed.

she mightve seen it happen already.

man what the hell is going on in this planet😭😭

[jasminethetransvampire]

Ship It! for Kakegurui?

I think the way this is supposed to work is that you send me a ship then I give my thoughts on it, but fuck it this works too.

The ship I will be detailing my thoughts on is Kirasaya, as in Momobami Kirari x Igarashi Sayaka!

(Disclaimer, I've only watched the anime so take my opinion with a grain of salt)

What made you ship it?

Throughout the entirety of season 1 I kept fucking hoping that Kirari would get her shit together and actually knowledge her feelings for Sayaka (if she actually had them) and stop letting the poor girl live in doubt. Then came season 2, and the Tower of Doors, and let me tell you I literally fucking cheered and fist-bumped the air at the end. That was the turning point from "Ehhhhh" to "Full speed ahead, next stop yuri town".

What are your favorite things about the ship?

The fact that Kirari is basically an absolutely fucking insane chaos gremlin who couldn't even confess to her crush without pulling a massively elaborate stunt that must have cost her millions to arrange and construct. And Sayaka, smitten angel that she is, is 100% there for it. She loves this fucking lunatic. Yeah, she probably should sit Kirari down and explain to her that fucking with her head like that IS NOT OKAY, but I believe in these messy bitches. They can make it work.

Is there an unpopular opinion you have on your ship?

It's much more boring when it's interpreted as a toxic relationship. Like, you're stripping away the layers that make them interesting when you just turn it into "manipulative psychopath takes advantage of naive lovestruck fool". Like, in my completely subjective opinion, that shit just doesn't work. EDIT: Clarified some wording.

[roboyomo]

I've always loved Ayin as a Character since Lobotomy corporation. And this just grows as more City Lore comes out. Because damn, he's insane. In every way possible.

First, it seems like he didn't even really believe in Carmen Ideal. Nor did he even really understand it? He's just doing it because he was asked by Carmen. He seemed like the type that finished every task given to him. Which is most likely never been a problem because he's a genius. Then Carmen gave him a task. A last dying task. Well he did some seriously messed up things. But he finished the Task. An impossible one and he did it. I think I began to love his character with this quote. "Yet I, who held no such ambition, have to continue her legacy". He knows he did lots of atrocities. He's crushing under the weight of guilt but still doing it, because this is the path that WILL fulfil their goal. A goal he himself didn't even really have.

Then, as ruina and Limbus came out, I just realized the sheer scale and power he amass as the Head of Wing. Because damn. That's one hell of a power position. And it seems like he's a major power even amongst the Wings. And he did it by making a large scale multi wings war. Which we are STILL feeling in the following games. And he probably sees this position, the highest position one could possibly reach in the city, as a means to an end. Just a stepping stone. That's insane.

He's also an utter genius on a whole new level. I think I'm Lobotomy, it's implied that he also got followers? Like Benjamin who's also a genius but thinks Ayin was on a whole other level above him. He can do robotic, Ai, surgery, management and who knows what else. Just look at Angela to see what his skill can do. And it's implied that he took up robotic to make Angela specifically. It's not even his field.

That's not even mentioning all the middle finger he gave the head with everything he did.

I'm gonna be real with the fact that I actuallt hated Ayin at the start of watching the lore of the projmoonverse, but damn after being invested more and more, Ayin really grew on me. I despise his awful actions, but imo he is a great character in terms of writing. Not the best person but like we have seen what happens in the city and other wings in LoR, so I feel like it's not all that shocking at this point (heavily on what happens inside W. Corp. trains,,,)

But also YES the amount of this unknown and sheer power that Ayin has is absolutely crazy. He caused SO MUCH SHIT in the City, like a literal war between the wings, all to finally achieve the goal of completing the Seed of Light project, its genuinely insane. And if you consider how Abel in Lobcorp implied that the entirety of the LC facility is extracted from Ayin's mind, thus making it his E.G.O and the ordeals could be what happens if his E.G.O gets a little unstable and like???? Have you realized just what absolute POWER this man would have if his E.G.O was something like what The Red Mist's E.G.O is. One of the Ordeals is literally The Claw - and you're telling me that they are spawned in the facility BY the facility?? Not only is he highly intelligent, but he is actually so fucking insane in some way to the point that what is extracted out of his mind - is an entire WING in the city that caused so much outside and inside, despite acting so nonchalantly as if he's like,,, just an another dude that has no ambitions whatsoever. Like BRO he has some crazy The Head-level power in his hands and he uses it to continue pursuing the goal Carmen asked him to finish.

It's genuinely scary to think about Ayin's learning capabilities and his capabilities in full amount if he is just THIS SMART and what is extracted out of his mind is THIS INSANE. If he was somehow an arbiter of the Head, he would be crazy good at his job I feel like, and I think that's saying something about what he is capable of!!!

[theajaheira]

your tags on that fandom post got me thinking of how... defensive fandom is of the status quo kinda? like I'm white so this might come off like I'm absolving myself which I'm not, but so often I see "fandom is a queer run space that fixes canon! buuuut we're going to focus on the white men because they're the only ones with depth :) and we're going to make actually good female characters cookie cutter. and we're going to ignore black men and especially black women. but queer run safe space!!"

the minute i got this ask i knew i had to wait until i was at home with my laptop because my fingers cannot fly as fast on my phone as they can on the computer keys. this is literally so much of what is happening in the buffy fandom. the whole thing is built on intrinsic systemic racism n misogyny that's reinforced within the show and that many in the fandom do not critically engage with in the slightest. it is absolutely objectively insane to me that i can make a post going, for example, "hey, isn't it fucked up as hell that the show treats the romani people as evil for wanting angel to suffer?" and then people will come into my inbox or land in my reblogs and go "well, actually, the show treats the romani people as shortsighted and bad at long-term planning, and i choose to read them that way too :)" and fully not see that there is a hell of a problem with THAT statement as well (real thing that happened). OR that kennedy hate is still hugely in vogue because she's mean and bratty and terrible and doesn't know her place!!! OR kendra's death & how easily she is forgotten by the fandom!!!!! OR the entire trend of handing buffy to a person's favorite character like a little trophy they've earned for being tortured and sad, reducing her to a facet of a romantic relationship & implying that this is what she needs to feel and be complete!

OR OH MY GOD THE ENTIRETY OF EVERYTHING SURROUNDING SPIKE. where do i even start with spike. completely serious, i am honestly endlessly impressed by the people who can still handle being fans of spike, because being a fan of spike means having to wade through 20 million fics where That Bitch Buffy must be narratively punished for abusing poor baby spike who only ever wanted to love her and was totally out of character every time he hurt her (and also drusilla is a vapid whore who didn't love spike, ever.) like i am not at this point in time always strong enough to engage with spike content simply because there is so much spike content that is SOAKED in violent misogyny repackaged as Deep, Torrid Romance. it's exhausting to try and find the good stuff when sometimes even the good stuff will throw you a curveball in chapter five or shy uncomfortably away from the racist realities of spike's character. the fact that robin wood has been hated for so long because he had the Nerve and the Audacity to want retribution for his mom, and that he is framed as in the wrong for wanting that, is in and of itself so fucking upsetting to me.

AN Y WAY. i agree with you. and i get what you're saying. i think an awareness of the pattern and a willingness to feel uncomfortable within your own mistakes is always a good place to start. i try so hard never to dig my heels in if i can avoid it.

[lumiereandcogsworth]

okay I'm a little late but uhhhhhh top 5 favorite batb scenes !! or songs !! or both !!! whatever floats your boat 😇

YIPPEE!!!! :)) i had so much fun going to find these screencaps. also it was terribly difficult to narrow down. please note that the True Answer to “what’s my favorite scene” is the entirety of the film 🫡 but here are some special ones, not really in a particular order because that would be impossible.

the adam & lumière hug

i’ve gone insane about this so many times but my goodness it makes me crazy. the implication of it all. the HISTORY that it provides for their relationship!!!! it’s evidence of an absolute lore FEAST that i have been enjoying these past seven years. i love them so so so much.

The Dance™️

obviously i believe this to be the dance of all time. it is so gorgeous and beautiful and IT IS THE WAY THEY EXPRESS THEIR LOOOOOVE!!!!!!!!!! i’ll never be over it. their outfits. the song. the atmosphere. the way they look at each other like the entire world around them has ceased to exist. AAAAHHHHHH.

the celebration ball!!!!

what a beautiful beautiful beautiful ending this is. it’s just so joyous. they’re so happy. they’re SO HAPPY. the way they smile, ESPECIALLY ADAM…. oh i just can’t be normal about it folks!

the colonnade conversation

AGH. this conversation is so important to me. so absolutely vital and one of THE biggest reasons that this version will always be superior to the animated one, TO ME ‼️‼️‼️ i just love that they get a chance to just sit and talk. they tease each other and joke and talk seriously as well. they share personal feelings and grow closer and it’s such clear evidence of how they’ve BEEN interacting over the course of belle’s time here. it’s so clear that they’ve become confidants and friends and that love is very much flowering between them. it’s such a simple conversation but it’s executed so perfectly and it means everything to me😭

their first meeting

sorry to keep throwing stones but you got me talking about my wife i’m gonna put her on a pedestal. this scene is ALSO way better than the animated version and i love it so so so much. i love how much more stubborn and self-centered adam is. i love that when she asks him to come into the light, he DOESN’T. he’s TOO ashamed of himself to even reveal his face to her at first. and this shot right here is just 🤌🤌 CHEF’S KISS!!!

SPEAKING OF KISSING HERE’S A 6TH SCENE

ONLY KISS OF ALL TIME ONLY KISS EVER!!!!!!!!! such a beautiful movie kiss. such a kiss. WOWZA!!!! i can’t even elaborate i just keep looking at it. but yeah dude yeaaaaahhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! the whole interaction leading up to it is just genuinely incredible. i go NUTS thinking about how adam waits for belle to make the first move every step of the way. he’s still so afraid of hurting her or scaring her that he just lets her explore him first. she feels his face (AND HE HAS THAT LITTLE SMILE‼️) first and then he holds hers. and they just look at each other until she looks at his lips and then back up at him and leans in and he leans in and OUUKGHSKFHSJ💥✨💥⚡️‼️✨💥🔥🌟✨‼️☀️💥✨‼️

also sorry i have 4 more honorable mentions because uhhh this film is the love of my life?

paris

just everything about them going to paris is. so important. the fact that adam even suggested they run away is enough to make me crazy. but once there HERE?? ugh. adam immediately being so nerdy about it, but then looking at belle so seriously as she reveals that this is where she was born and this is the home she should’ve grown up in and the gravity of them being here just settles in. and adam is just. gosh. he’s SO caring toward her. he’s so incredibly GENTLE during this whole thing. BECAUSE HE LOVES HER SO MUCHHHH. and then the flashback. ooooooohhhhh buddy. you KNOW how i feel about maurice & maria. AUGUGHGHFJDHJD!!!!! paris scene truly is the scene of all time. it’s another lore feast that i have (clearly) been absolutely demolishing for years now.

belle & maurice hug 🤧

oooohhhhhhhhh these two mean the WORLD to MEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! all of their scenes are so deeply precious to me but this one with the “it’s alright! now go, live your life, and forget me” “forget you?? everything i am is because of you!” “i love you belle, don’t be afraid” “i love you too, papa. i’m not afraid.” UHHHHHHHH OKAY GUESS I’LL JUST EXPLODE???????? gosh. they’re everything to me. NEVER FORGET that in a movie where saying “i love you” is THE turning point of the plot… the first time it was uttered was from a father to his daughter 🥹 THAT’S WHERE SHE LEARNED THE UNCONDITIONAL LOVE GUYS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

shenanigans in the woods

this probably appears fairly out of place from the rest of the scenes i love, but there’s just something about gaston’s dialogue in this scene where he’s, ya know, threatening maurice’s life and such, that really scratches my brain. i also love his dialogue right before the mob song, so consider that an honorable mention too, but idk!! this scene is so funny and entertaining to me. which is funny in and of itself because it used to be like my least favorite scene. but lmao???? lefou asking gaston to calm down by thinking about death?? booping his nose??? gaston saying to maurice “please forgive me, old bean” ??? FJSKDK i love this scene so much, it very often makes me laugh.

and lastly :) hand hold :) hold hand :)

THEY’RE HOLDING HANDS🫵🫵🫵🫵

anyway hi you also asked me about my top 5 favorite songs, here’s that too:

be our guest — SO STIMMYYYY i love to sing and dance to it so much. i get so hyped. and it’s so visually GORGEOUS.

evermore — uhhh only love song ever. SADDEST love song ever. a lamentation that has, more than once, caused me to pause mid-song so i can write a quick happily ever after ficlet because i cannot STAND watching adam think he’s never going to see belle again. makes me utterly insane always and forever.

days in the sun — so sweet so good so underrated so lovelyyyyy and it Literally starts with a song adam’s mother sang to him and now he’s singing it to her. i’m gonna be SICK.

gaston — SO SO SO FUN. SO FUN. THE CHOREOGRAPHY WENT SO HARD.

beauty and the beast — i mean yeah. Yeah. I MEAN YEAH COME ON NOW THAT’S WHAT IT’S ALL ABOUT BABEYYY💙💛💙💛💙💛

[beevean]

Saw some terrible takes about Silver, but it got me thinking: for all the fuss raised about how issue 63 and 64 would be centered around him, the actual events had zero bearing on what would come after. Despite the fact that everyone in the Restoration was all startled and spooked by him dropping Duo an entire life-threatening one meter (😱), everyone is totally cool with him coming right in with his daaaaaangerous powers he absolutely cannot handle responsibly lifting a whole-ass metal container around in issue 67. And not a single cool OC who needs to keep an eye on him because he's too much of a loose canon otherwise in sight! It does not decrease my suspicions that the entirety of Silver's involvement with the Duo plot was put in only as a cheap rehash of the traiter plot from Archie, but this time with a "fun" "twist" that still paints Silver as an OoC fool. And that honestly makes me peeved: of course, I'm glad they've dropped the "Silver is too irresponsible with his powers and needs to be kept an eye on" bs (for now...), but in the same vein, why include him in a story at all if he's only there to get the piss taken out of him for two issues and then continue on like nothing happened? He barely even cared about what happened with Duo anymore in the second half of issue 64, almost all his angsting there was about what his purpose of being in the past is instead! It doesn't reek of the slightest form of plot or story consistency to me.

Yeah, you're right. Lanolin made that whole fuss about kicking out Silver from the DCs because he caused nothing but trouble, but then he's still allowed to do his thing in an even more delicate environment?

I'm sure you do. Especially when you get humiliated in front of the whole Restoration because now they believe you to be insanely dangerous to common citizens :)

Oh look, Silver is fooling around in the warehouse, so goofy :D

hey remember when Lanolin treated him like a child because she believed that he couldn't even move some rocks

I guess he got over that injustice very quickly, huh.

I agree with your feelings on this. I don't want to see this plotline ever again, but at the same time, it highlights how episodic and inconsistent IDW's story is. Silver had his angst time, now it's time to move on like nothing happened. Huh, the same thing happened with the MV arc.

The only one who has to continuously suffer is Whisper, I suppose :)

[natlacentral]

Rising actor Ian Ousley is making waves in Avatar: The Last Airbender.

When speaking with Ousley, seeing what the casting directors saw in him wasn’t difficult. A sharp wit, a dry sense of humour, and a charm that could easily capture the hearts of millions. He is the embodiment of Sokka of the Southern Water Tribe and he absolutely kills it in the live-action Avatar: The Last Airbender. Premiering this past February, Ian brings the character to life with a new dimension, giving us (the fans) a glimpse of what makes Sokka truly tick. It is clear the initial animated series meant a lot to him and the entirety of the crew that worked on the show. If you’re expecting a beat-for-beat retelling of the animated series, you’re going to be sorely disappointed, but if you open your mind (and heart) to new interpretations, you’ll be in for a pleasant surprise.

Being a fan of the original series himself, Ian never dreamed that the opportunity would even land on his doorstep. However, when Netflix announced they would be doing a live-action retelling, fast forward to mid-2021, Ian is sitting in a hotel getting the call that the directors had found their Sokka. As they pass the torch to a new generation to be introduced to the beloved show and its characters.

Following the news of Netflix renewing the show for another two seasons, Ian Ousley talks with 1883 Magazine about his love for the original animated series, his proudest moments on the show and his hopes for later seasons. He also chats about how he keeps himself centered after a long day, which character he’d like to switch places with and so much more! 

So, first things first, congratulations on Avatar: The Last Airbender being out in the world! 

I know, it’s crazy!  

How long have you been working on the show? Before Netflix officially announced it, or?

Truthfully, I don’t remember when it got announced. But I do remember being in my kitchen and hearing about it being like, “Gosh, that’s insane. I wonder who they’re going to get for that.” Not even thinking it would be me. It just seemed so otherworldly at the time. This was years before I auditioned for the show, I believe. Maybe about a year before? I remember sitting with my manager at the time (we were close) and I made him watch the whole first season. I just subtly nudged him, “Hey, dude, this is casting. I love the show.” I got cast much later, end of May 2021. I didn’t know what I was auditioning for. It had a code name and everything. My manager didn’t know either, when he found out, he was like, “Well, I guess I got it for you!”

Did you have a suspicion when you were reading for the part? Did it feel familiar at all?

I think it goes back to what I just said about me being in the kitchen. It had a name. Usually, the ones Netflix wants to keep secret do. And so, I was like, “Let’s think about this. Could this be Avatar?” Because the character description was so much about his sister. And I said to myself, “She has power. She has to save the world. She doesn’t know how to handle her powers.” It sounded like she was supposed to be the lead character. So, maybe not Avatar. The funny thing is, I was practicing with my sister and she said, “This is like the secret tunnel episode!” And I was thinking, “There’s no way that’s in season two!” And we moved on! 

When did they finally break the news to you that you were auditioning for The Last Airbender? Was your mind blown?

It’s funny, I was going through my behind-the-scenes for the show last night. I was on this deep dive of all the memories and stuff. I found a video after I did the chemistry read. I was like, “Hey, I just did the chemistry read for the show ‘Tradewinds’.” I was fully immersed in the fact that this was so new, I thought it was going to be like Outer Banks. When I got it though, I freaked out. They told me I was going to do a personality test, which I was very scared of. Also, my management team didn’t know what this was. So, they were like, “We’ve never heard of this before. You might have been a jerk, so they want to make sure you’re not a jerk to work with, you need to put your personality on for this.” And I was like, “What? Give me another audition, please! I’d rather do another audition.” I was out in the country, and I had no cell service.

Oh, no!

I had to drive to a hotel 30 minutes away that I hadn’t even booked. I sat down, threw on a different shirt and was ready to show the most personality I’ve ever shown in my life [laughter]. They didn’t let me talk, they were just like, “Hey, we’ve looked all over the world for this role.” I originally thought I was up against 40 people but it was 10. They said, “This is for Avatar: The Last Airbender and we’ve been looking for our Sokka.” And I just burst into tears, I started crying. I was doing that cry where you can’t quite catch your breath.

The ugly cries?

[laughs] Yeah, the ugly cries!

Has it sunk in yet?

I mean, I think so. I think one of the most grounding moments for me was the premiere. Watching it with a bunch of other people who were really enjoying it. It was so surreal getting to celebrate each other for all the hard work we put into it. And I think we’re all proud. So yeah, that was one moment that made it feel real. Also, meeting Jack De Sena (the original voice actor for Sokka) was crazy.

I saw that clip!

I never thought I’d meet him, honestly! So, that was a cool thing. He talked to me after the premiere and said some kind things, which I’m going to keep private. 

Of course.

But it was really, special to me. It was amazing.

Now that The Last Airbender is out what scene are you most excited for fans to react to and why?

That’s such a big question! There are a lot of great scenes! You could pick any scene from episode 8. I’m excited for fans to see the scale of our show and the epic magnitude of the fighting. I’m excited for fans to see the more human elements of Sokka. Who he is and why he is the way that he is. I would have to go with an arc instead of a scene, but the arc he has with his father and episode 5 is really special, and I think fans will open a new pathway in their heart once they see that episode and why our show is the way that it is. It’s still in the spirit of the animation. There’s a lot of new material when you see these characters in the flesh.

I agree. The live-action gives way to more character growth and new moments to be created. Since we’re talking about arcs, what advice would you give to Sokka as he goes on his journey? 

Before Season One or before Season Two?

Let’s go before Season Two.

Okay, so he’s learned a lot, honestly. I think some of the advice I’d give to him is to be grateful for the time he had with Yue instead of holding on to the past. I would also advise him to let go of Katara a little bit and let her become her own person and empower her the best he can. Be more open-minded. Also, he could love the kids in the water tribe a little better. In Season One he’s fed up.

He’s just a guy with a boomerang doing the best he can.

He definitely is!

How would you say you’ve grown as an actor since booking the role?

I don’t even recognize myself as a person! But this show has changed my life forever, in more ways than one. I mean the people I’ve gotten to meet are the most important thing. And the material means so much to all of us. It’s not very often that you get a project that everyone is so passionate about making good. Like the best that it can be. What was the question?

How do you feel you’ve grown as an actor since booking?

There’s nothing like experience. There’s nothing like experience on location, I was very far away from home for 13 months. I just immersed myself. I don’t think I would have been able to carry on if I didn’t give everything I possibly could to this role which is what I think I was trying to say earlier. Everyone was in that mindset. I roomed with Dallas Liu, who portrays Prince Zuko, and we were helping each other. We were figuring out each other’s scenes. I did a lot of acting classes, but there’s nothing like getting to play in front of cameras, it’s a whole new dance, especially when you’re in front of that thing every day. So, I still have a long way to go I’m only 21. I feel like I more than levelled up on the show, just like anything, you grow if you’re doing it for 12 hours a day for 13 months. I feel like a whole different actor than I was a year ago. I’m so proud of the work that I did.

As you should be! If you could switch roles with one of your castmates, who would it be and why?

Appa, bro! Just switch the faces out! It would be terrifying, but I think I could pull it off.

Oh, to be a flying bison soaring through the sky.

I joked around and I said, “Guys, I think I can do it!” The voice actor they got for Appa is incredible, I just wanted to do one sound. They wouldn’t let me do it.

I feel like that was a missed opportunity.

That’s what I’m saying! 

You never know, they may let you for season two! So, when the press junkets and the interviews are over, what do you do to unwind? What does your free time look like? 

Yeah. It’s kind of a weird job. Because you leave the press junkets and you leave these experiences that are honestly just talking for 8 hours? It’s like a therapy session. It’s not that deep or intense. It’s just being mindful not to say the wrong thing and that you’re serving the show the best way you can. It’s a whole other side of the job I’ve never experienced before. It’s a whole other job in a way. And you leave these things feeling fantastic, but by the time you get home, you’re drained. It’s like you want to lay on your couch and fall asleep.

So, for me, I try to realign spiritually. For me, when you’re giving a lot, you have to pull from a source, and that source for me is God. I’ll just sit in worship and I’ll read my bible and journal and pray. I’ll work out with Dallas, too, to try and get some of that physicality out. Also, fashion is a big part of my life. I read a lot of magazines; Vogue and such. I’ll draw occasionally. Just whatever inspires me. But mainly reading and just sitting with the Lord is the thing that centers me.

Looking to the future, what is one scene from the animated series you’re looking forward to seeing brought to life?

Oh, man. I’ll choose a serious one, and then a fun one. Okay, I need my space sword! And for a serious one… there are so many. Anything with Sparky-Sparky Boom man! I don’t know if we’ll get to him, but I hope so! 

I forgot about him! I think seeing combustion bending in live-action would be so cool, especially with what we’ve seen with bending so far! And lastly, what advice would you give young Ian knowing everything you do now? 

Oh, wow. To young Ian, don’t put too much stock into material stuff. Don’t stress out so much, it’s all going to be chill. Enjoy it more. I was so worried about ‘making it’ that it was the main thing in my life. I was consumed with film in general because I wanted to direct, I wanted to act, and I wanted to write. So, just chill out, you’re 15 — everything is going to work out just fine. Even if it wasn’t this [acting], it would have been something else. I believe that. Just work hard at something. Something that you’re passionate about and give it up to the Lord, honestly. That’s all you can do. I think that’s a recipe for success in any field for any person.

Interview Dana Reboe Photography Ben Duggan Styling Douglas Van Laningham at The Rex Agency Grooming Stephanie Nicole Smith using Prism Botanics and Bumble and Bumble Studio Vision Studio LA

[ninjabot215]

ITS MUSIC MONDAY BITCHES!!!!!

"Erm exsqueeze me whags a music Monday" you may be asking

ITS WHEN I POST A BUNCH OF MUSIC I'VE BEEN LISTENING TO, BUT ON A MONDAY

IF YOU WANNA REBLOG WITH A BUNCH OF MUSIC YOU'VE BEEN LISTENING TO, THATS COOL AND YOU SHOULD TOTALLY DO IT

ALSO ITD BE COOL IF YOU WROTE A COUPLE WORDS ABOUT WHY YA LIKE THA SONG (if you feel like it but if you don't want to that's also valid I just want more cool stuff to listen to 👉👈)

oki anywho here we go :3

I fucking love furries throwing a shit ton of drums and bass over sped up / pitched up 2000s music. Gotta be one of my favorite genders. Like the super loud bass during the back half of this song makes me wanna throw my body around like a gmod ragdoll in a old tf2 machinima.

Just a genuinely really good mashup of two excellent songs. Makes me feel some form of odd sadness that I can't really describe. 10/10 would decompose in my bed again.

Really good mix that unlike a lot of Waters of Nazareth mixes doesn't go super overboard. Manages to juggle the 11 (!) songs its using really well and is one of my go to songs to put on while absolutely throwing my "academic career".

Good classic hardcore complete with a goofy whimsical ass section in the middle of it. Uhh like seriously the part starting at 2:21 is so different from the other halves its sandwiched between I love it so much. Also there's an assload of ytpmvs of this song.

I love this song so fucking much. Peak tbh. The fucking guitar, the little sad section where the vocals gradually layer and build up to the finale, Just the overall vibes, its all just so good. Also Weezer lmao.

I cant even begin to explain what a mashup tournament is concisely in this already long-ass post so this is gonna be complete nonsense if you don't already know what I mean. This is probably one of the best songs from the entirety of TFA, perfect representation of the contestent its for. The fuckin part where Lifetime Achievement award gets pitch-corrected to sound like Harder Better Faster Stronger makes me levitate. Leans a little too hard into FNAF sources near the end but otherwise balances H3M's arsenal really well.

Another song from a mashup tournament, but a different one. Pretty much exactly what a good bracket theme needs to be, its hype as all hell and showcases all the characters really good while still being mostly cohesive. Its a miracle that a mashup of 29 songs goes as hard as it does without anything going too off-beat / key.

Its fucking Spiderwebs. If you haven't heard it just listen to it. Its so good. I can't explain why I like it better than the song itself can.

I mean come on. The sampling in this is insane. The flow makes me vibe outside of safe operating limits. I just love how the chords bounce around inside my head.

A really good reimagining of one of my favorite albums of all time. I actually kinda like some of the songs on this more that the original album (shoutout to Superheros for using the whos been sleeping in my bed sample more that shit goes so hard) and the new vocals are all really good too. I love the fact that its also half mashups - half complete remakes / remixes, gives the best of both worlds. Obviously the original Discovery album is still the goat and this wouldn't exist with out it but I still really appreciate this for what it is.

If you made it this far thanks for reading my deranged rambling and listening to my wack musical tastes. It was fun to write this so I'll probably keep posting these on Mondays until I get bored or forget. I would really appreciate it if you posted some music you like in the reblogs because I'm trying to make my bigass unorganized playlist bigger so any help is good. Anyhow thanks for reading / listening byeeeeee

[autisticjoshrusso]

What are your favorite Josh headcanons?

its the way that im so incapable of shutting the fuck up about this guy but the moment i get asked directly im like UHHHH IDK. so apologies if this is kind of a mess <3 also i rarely think about cute and fluffy things i am always digging deep into trauma and such so uh yeah these are going to be on the heavier side.

The biggest one is obviously that he's autistic, shocking I know. Who would've guessed this would be a dearly held headcanon of tumblr user autisticjoshrusso. It truly makes me so insane and I'm incapable of like... properly summarizing it in its entirety so I am actually working on going through ep by ep breaking down my thoughts about it. So far there's just this one post, but I am slowly but surely working through a series rewatch and doing this along the way. So. Stay tuned? JKDFHKJ

I think he was very obviously Gay even as a child and that it definitely affected his ability to socialize throughout his entire childhood and adolescence. Like he's very much giving "only had female friends who may or may not have treated him like an actual human person and not their accessory GBF". And he still leans into that "persona" sometimes as an adult because it's an easy way to be liked <3 again its the autism but yknow.....

Speaking of childhood, he's giving only child to me. And I think his relationship to his parents is just... non-existent. He didn't deliberately cut contact, it wasn't any sort of dramatic abuse situation, they just... aren't close? It's that thing where they knew he was gay from the start but also never really knew how to handle it, never being fully accepting but not outright hateful, just a very awkward medium that made it difficult to form a lasting bond into adulthood. They text once per holiday and are friends on Facebook.

This one doesn't really have much of a canon basis but rather builds on my other headcanons, and that's that growing up being a Known Gay led him to well... his own kind of Buck 1.0 era, so to speak. Basically being the favorite secret hookup for every deeply closeted sports bro, which was horrific for his mental health but was like... scraps of attention/intimacy that he wouldn't get otherwise, so why not keep doing it? I like this one because not only does it make the whole trying to avoid a meaningless hookup when he rejoined dating apps thing more meaningful and hurt even more than it already does, but also adds a new layer of substance to his beef with Eddie that I think is really interesting.

The timeline of this show is all sorts of fucked so I've just decided that like... he either just turned or will soon be turning 40, and definitely has some feelings about that because when he was younger he did NOT expect he'd live to be that old <3 Not necessarily in an active ideation way, but more of a passive disregard for his life and just general queer pessimism? I hold that Sue saved his life twice, first in the fire and then by giving him a job that gave him an actual sense of purpose and direction for probably the first time ever. Every time he thinks about the fact he might actually end up being a proper Queer Elder he just?? surprised pikachu meme.

I was going to just do five of these but for the sake of not having all of these be sad as fuck, one last bonus one for you is that I think his main special interest(s) is celebrities and films and pop culture and stuff like that <3 like he WILL infodump about the lead actress' entire filmography before you can actually watch the movie.

Thank you for asking I love talking about my favorite special guy <3 Minor characters are my absolute favorite and I love to come up with deeper backstories than what we're given based on over-analyzing all of their behaviors <3

[crabknight]

Just watched the entirety of Centaurworld today, and my thoughts are kind of split

The show in general was fine solid 6 to 7 out of 10, but there were some parts that I absolutely LOVED so it will stay on 7/10

Spoilers under the cut if you care

Now listen, I love rider, top 2 favorite characters, but I don't like their fake-out death, I think they should have died, otherwise what even was the point of their dying scene, and it's not like there's any story left that would need her to be alive

But everything before the timeskip in the ending I really liked, especially the end of the nowhere king

I think the show in general was fine, the messages were nice and written in a fine way, but most of the time wasn't anything special. But everything involving the nowhere king was aboslutely fantastic, definitly the best part of the show

It's very refreshing that a childrens comedy show with a vibe like this has a villain that is not only terrifying, well written, but also taken seriously by the show and the wacky characters in it, like the zaney characters don't joke around about the villain and actually treat him as the horrifying presence that he is

My three favorite characters in this show are as follows

1. Nightmare king, I've already mentioned him a couple of times, but I will never get over how genuenly terrifying and awesome this guy is. AND HIS BACKSTORY OH MY GOSH HIS BACKSTORY THEY ACTUALLY WENT SO HARD WHEN THEY WERE WRITING THIS CHARACTER AHHHHHHH

Also, his lullaby is hauntingly beautiful and a very good descriptor of him

2. Rider, gotta be honest, this is mostly because of the design, but I do also really like her calm and collected personality, it's a nice break from the insanity that can be centaurworld sometimes. I really like the duality of choosing bewteen your best friend and the person you've been idolising you're whole life, but barely know. Her lullaby also has a very nice vibe that makes me feel safe and calm, great voice. But come on!! Just look at her!!!! How can you not love her!!!!!!!

3. Woman (yes that is what she is referred to, they never day a name, an ocurring theme in the show for humans), I like her mostly because of her relations and interactions with the nowhere king, the general and their shared backstory. Also love the fact that she always hesitates when attacking the nowhere king but does not hesitate to kick the general of the cliff, and then still hesitates against elktaur at the end but still ends it while crying, it is a magnificent way to show what kind of person she is and her connection and feelings towards the entirety of nowhere king/general/elktaur. Someone help the traumatised lady please

Oh theres also the chubby gay tigertaur with a beard, he was also cool

Anyway, 7/10 for the entire show, but with an absolutetly imaculate villain. Overall, do recommend, if only for the nowhere king

[cruelfeline]

One of my Forspoken pet peeves is the rather common complaint that Frey is an unpleasant character. Or that she's too mean, too rude, too unsympathetic. I can understand personal character preferences, but I feel like the opinions I see, particularly in various reviews, move past personal preference and into "this is an objectively bad character" territory. Which vexes me for multiple reasons.

First and foremost: Frey has every reason on Earth to be sullen, snarky, unpleasant, and negative. Her life has been terrible. She spent the functional entirety of it growing up in the NYC foster system, only to age out and end up living alone, on the streets, with zero support network, zero safety net, and all of her trauma unaddressed and untreated. She's left in abject poverty, vulnerable to unsavory individuals who have zero issue literally trying to burn her to death.

She knows she was abandoned as a baby, and this is awful enough. But worse, in my mind, is knowing that she lived in the system her whole life, and no one claimed her. No one adopted her. No one decided they wanted her. And she was a newborn! It's one thing to have an older child not be adopted; that's a known difficulty. But a few-day-old infant? Just the notion that she entered the system at like... day three of her existence and was there the whole eighteen years with no one deciding they wanted her in their family has to be unbelievably crushing. Like... I can't imagine. I can't imagine how much it hurts to not only believe that your birth parent didn't want you, but that literally no one else did, either.

Now, moving on to her demeanor in Athia: people seem to find it off-putting that Frey behaves selfishly upon being asked to help Cipal's inhabitants. I can't say I do. What the Athians are asking of her is tremendous. To the point that, honestly, I find it a little bizarre that people, both real and Cipalian characters, are annoyed by her reluctance.

I mean... Jiminy Christmas, think about what they want her to do! They want her to go out into the wilds, a place filled with countless monstrous horrors, and fight them. With magic she's just barely learned to use. And because they don't know that she has Cuff with her, we can infer that they want her to do this all by herself. Just. Go ahead, kid. Go run around outside, in the Break-mist, with hundreds of mutated monsters and vicious zombies and maddened Tantas attacking you from all sides. Use the magic that none of us can teach you to use. Use the fighting skills none of us can train you in. And if you... I dunno, break your legs out there? Welp, none of us can come and get you! You'd better hope you can drag yourself back. Alone.

the irony of this is that Cuff's motives are terrible but the fact that he is there to guard and teach and guide Frey makes him more useful to her than all the Athians combined

It's absurd. What they ask of her is insanity, and while I appreciate that they are desperate people with no other options, I also think it's perfectly reasonable for her to balk at their demands. They're asking her to just... walk into hell for them. For them: the people who tossed her into jail the moment they met her. Who can blame her for not throwing herself recklessly into the role of "hero," in those circumstances?

And y'all know what? Ultimately, past that thick shield built upon years of trauma and pain? Frey is sweet. She's innately kind. She strives to be empathetic and helpful. She can be silly and playful and kind of dorky. She can't always get there because she is so accustomed to being in Defense Mode, but she still manages! She's absolutely precious with Homer and literally every other cat she meets. She's a sweetheart to the Cipalian sheep and clearly enjoys feeding them, plus is acutely aware of how they, too, might feel trapped in Cipal's walls. She empathizes with someone like Jennesh, who treated her poorly from the get-go but has potentially suffered in ways she's familiar with. Most telling to me is that she extends a hand to a creature like Cuff, seeking to understand and offer companionship to someone who has done nothing but harm everyone around him since his creation.

also she's interacted with Pilo multiple times and not killed him, which makes her a better person than I will ever be

Frey's character works for me because she has every reason to be as she is, both in terms of her past and in terms of what is happening to her now. She's built an incredible emotional shield to protect her from the abysmal circumstances of her life, and she's not shy about using it to protect herself. That doesn't make her off-putting to me. That makes her deeply sympathetic.