#the ai is so dumb oh my god

[idiotwhotalkstoomuch]

Replaying Persona 5 Royal with a challenge where no one but Joker can and must use support and status moves and teammates can only attack with them having to be in full assault mode for every boss battle (mostly so exploration and grinding is still fun for me) and oh my god I want to find the person who made the Persona 5 teammate AI and PUNCH THEM IN THE NUTS (OR IN THE STOMACH IF THEY ARENT BIOLOGICALLY MALE)

[moonsidesong]

ai chatbots are so corny and they drive me slightly insane. just go write bad fanfiction in your notes app. like “wowie look at what this computer can do!!!” ok dont care have you considered finding intrinsic value in creating something with your very own hands

[coridallasmultipass]

TUMBLR WHY STOP THIS IS A CHILD LMAO

I'M IN FUCKING TEARS LMAO STOP PFFAHAHAHAHA

[veone]

playing the last of us 2 and constantly managing to survive with two bullets and Ellie pocket knife and no health has been an experience 😭

[impishjesters]

Time out for Jax

warning(s): Jax, temper/anger issues, inappropriate reaction, unhealthy coping methods, suggestive/implied sexual content, cursing note(s): I'm at a loss for the correct words I wanted to use in the tags, but Jax's anger is a little overkill and the reader admits to him not having great coping methods when he's really pissed off and at a breaking point. I'm in no way saying that type of coping/behaviour is acceptable, just that it exists. I also want to state that the sexual implications at the end are completely consensual! A/N: I don't know why this popped into my head but the idea of Caine putting Jax in time out only for it to not really be effective is absolutely hilarious. Plus I told my mom about it and she agreed it'd be something Caine would do and fail at.

“That’s it!” Caine shouted. He raised a hand and gave a quick snap, summoning thick iron bars from the ground that formed a small jail cell around Jax. “You sir, are in time out!”

You and a few others let out a surprised gasp. Caine had never gone so far as to actually do something to punish Jax for his behaviour, if you could even really call it a punishment.

Even Jax seemed surprised if you could get past the obvious miffed expression coupled with a few censored curses being thrown at the AI. Caine did nothing in response to the words except fix his clothes that had seemingly gone astray amidst his anger.

If you could call it that.

Caine turned to the rest of you and rushed through a more dramatic rendition of what was basically I Spy meets hide and seek, the activity he initially had started explaining before Jax’s little stunt. As soon as he finished explaining he let out a huff and disappeared with a poof of smoke.

“God dammit Jax!”

“Holy shit, I’ve never seen Caine so upset.”

“Oh, that’s worrying…”

“He didn’t give us a list of what we’re looking for…”

“Oh, maybe this thing?”

Everyone spoke over one another the moment he left, except for Jax who was still irked at being put in time out like a child of all things. “Oh c’mon this is bullshit, he’s the one who wants to keep us entertained.”

“You tried to pants him, baby.” You approached the bars with arms crossed, staring up at your idiot of a boyfriend. “I don’t even think you can pants him.”

He scoffed and copied your stance, crossing his arms. “It’s his fault we’re stuck here, he wants to entertain us then that would’ve been fucking hilariously entertaining.”

Of course, Jax didn’t feel guilt for literally taunting the entity that was likely your captor. He barely found himself feeling guilty when you did something stupid enough to make him laugh. Entertainment was entertainment, no discrimination there.

“How long do you think Caine will keep you in there?” Gangle asked, slowly approaching the two of you.

“Knowing that bastard? Who knows.” he shrugged.

“Hold on a second..” You took a step back and let your eyes roam the little makeshift prison before letting out a laugh. The whole thing was as tall as Jax and had at least enough room for him to stretch, but that wasn’t what made it so hilarious.

“What? What’s so funny?” Jax sneered, this whole thing wasn’t funny in the slightest. Weren’t you supposed to be on his side, as his partner? He was fucking stuck in this thing until you guys either finished this dumb little activity or got his attention to let him out.

The laughter caught the attention of the rest, causing them to slowly inch closer. “What’re they laughing at?” Ragatha asked.

“Heck if I know.” Jax threw his arms up and stared you down. “You gonna tell the rest of the class angel?”

It took a few moments to compose yourself, but the faint giggle never left you. Rather than answer them out loud you simply walked closer to the cage before slipping yourself between the bars, joining Jax. Caine had been so focused on putting Jax in a cage that he didn’t even take into consideration the spacing between the bars. Sure the bars were thick but they were spaced too far to really matter.

“Baby, you were never trapped.”

You walked back through the bars with little difficulty and Jax’s eye twitched with irritation. “You’ve gotta be shitting me…” He slapped a hand over his face and growled, stepping between the bars and finding himself outside the very useless prison. “I’ll kill him…”

“No, you won’t.” A sigh left you, the giggle dying down completely. At least for you, the others were still varying levels of laughter and giggles accompanied by Kinger’s slightly confusing questioning as to what everyone was laughing about. You could hear someone try to explain it to him but focus your attention on the man before you.

Jax was still agitated and like this, he would be nothing but bad company for the others. You turned to Ragatha and asked if they’d be able to handle the activity for now. She agreed, telling the two of you to return before they finished and got Caine back. Who knew how he’d respond to finding Jax outside of his time out punishment?

The others left and you turned back to Jax before offering an open palm. “How about we go to our room and let the others handle the game? I’ll even help you plan a few pranks.” If only to make sure that none of the others suffered too harshly at Jax’s irritation.

Sometimes his outbursts could get particularly nasty and would often result in some less-than-ideal words or pranks aimed at others. You’ve been on the receiving end a few times and while the first few times hurt, you knew it wasn’t anything to take personally over time.

It wasn’t healthy but it beat letting him keep everything pent up. Plus it had its rewards, Jax would always make it up to you in some way or another when that happened. The worse it was, the better the reward, and boy were those rewards worth it.

“Oh angel I’ve already got a list of pranks planned, but what I want to do is blow off this steam in other ways.” He jabbed a thumb behind himself. “Get walkin’ sweetie.”

Oh, this kind of blowing off steam was your favourite. Double reward in your book.

“Yes sir.”

Jax let out a low growl before following close behind. He’d definitely make it up to you for getting him out of that, his own anger clouded his judgment, and had it not been for you he’d still be stuck there. No, he was going to blow your back out and then reward you with a long, tender round two.

[rottenpumpkin13]

Out Of Context Shit Heard On The SOLDIER Floor #6

Previous: #1, #2, #3, #4, #5

Angeal: No, Genesis, you spaghetti-noodle-spine-having-ass bitch.

Sephiroth: I identify as a tonberry *chases Cloud with a kitchen knife*

Zack: Ra Ra Rasputin *kicks Sephiroth over*

Genesis: Unhand me you cretin *alone, talking to no one*

Angeal: Zack just showed me a picture of the Grinch and said "hear me out"

Lazard: No, Sephiroth, you cannot have a human-sized cat bed in your office "for enrichment"

Cloud: Parkour time *crashes through the air vents*

Sephiroth: I'm the biggest lesbian ally in this department, actually.

Angeal: For the sake of my sanity I'm gonna pretend I didn't just see Zack twerking to One Winged Angel.

Luxiere: I would commit unspeakable atrocities for a crumb of Zack's attention.

Lazard: That stripper pole better be gone when I get back or so help me, Genesis, I will return you to the goddess.

Sephiroth: *does a single pump of sore throat spray* This is enough for sustenance for the day.

Kunsel: Care for a deep-fried cigarette?

Angeal: You look like an AI-generated twink.

Sephiroth: I've grown so tired of Genesis's voice that we now communicate solely through interpretive dance.

Lazard, over the speakers: Whoever heated fish in the break room microwave, please come by my office so I can break your knees.

Zack: Aww, I forgot to feed the Roomba :(

Genesis: I don't know why me and Angeal are being judged. Simulating a birth with a watermelon is a perfectly normal activity for two people.

Kunsel: Hopefully this office party won't end in accidental weed use.

Angeal: WHY IS THERE A FAMILY OF RACCOONS IN THE TRAINING ROOM?

Genesis: I noticed some homosexual subtext in your screams, do you want to talk about that?

Angeal: *sniff sniff* Ooh~ who's barbecuing? OH MY GOD IT'S AN ELECTRIC FIRE.

Roche: Every time I think about chopping my hair short I think "Sephiroth wouldn't want this for me" and the feeling is gone.

Genesis: I made a friend *drags in a skeleton with a Sephiroth wig*

Cloud: *points at Angeal, Genesis and Sephiroth* Pure of heart, dumb of ass, big of tit.

Lazard: I told Zack to use Excel and he started sobbing.

Angeal: WHAT DO YOU HAVE AGAINST SEASONING YOUR GROUND BEEF?

Sephiroth: It's extremely rude to ask someone why they're eating a salad bowl of udon at 8 AM. Mind your business, Zack.

Cloud: Genesis likes Loveless so much because the title resonates with his love life.

Zack: You keep your anxiety pills in a takeaway to-go box? Dude that's so fancy.

Lazard: Why is Sephiroth the only one wearing a shirt??

Angeal: Common sense has chased Zack all his life but he wears wheelies so he's faster

Sephiroth: I personally don't use the peace sign because I haven't had a day of peace since I was 12.

Kunsel: I'm never going out in public with Zack again. A child's balloon popped when it went near his hair.

Angeal: No I'm not giving you an aspirin. Last time I gave you one you crushed it and snorted it like cocaine.

Lazard: An overwhelming majority of you peaked in kindergarten.

Sephiroth: Zack, I'm becoming increasingly concerned by the amount of potatoes in your pants right now.

Zack: This year I want an A/B/O themed birthday party.

Sephiroth: Please don't commit tax fraud, Genesis. You won't thrive in prison.

Genesis: Does anyone have an extra ramen packet to give Sephiroth? The 64 he consumed this morning weren't enough.

Roche: Commander Rhapsodos and his emo fringe is our culture.

Zack: I'm at my fucking limit! I'm about to eat a vegetable!

Genesis: He's a son of a bitch Sephiroth: That implies he has a mother, so I don't see how that's an insult.

Zack: Fuck around and find out *said with a chunk of Genesis' red coat hanging from his pocket*

Cloud: Does anyone have an extra brain cell? I lost my remaining one when Genesis spoke to me this morning.

Sephiroth: Damn.

Kunsel: Zack owes me so much money that if he sold his box of random shit he stole from Angeal, he still couldn't pay me back.

Angeal: Why are you guys playing Queen's Blood in the closet? is this a metaphor?

Genesis: Have you prayed to your Sephiroth cardboard cutout yet today?

Sephiroth: Alert me once Rufus Shinra arrives so that I may greet him adequately *said while building a pipe bomb*

Lazard: It's all fun and games until the timeout cage that I ordered online arrives.

Genesis: I will atone for my sins by becoming a nuisance to the environment.

Cloud: If Zack were a scented candle he'd smell like ADHD and crayons.

Sephiroth, standing on a table: DO NOT. EAT. THE CHEESECAKE. IN THE FRIDGE. It's mine.

Angeal: *with a bucket while it's raining hale* Free ice baby.

Zack: I finally have enough gil to buy a sixteen bouncy castles.

Genesis: Being overcome with the desire to eat pasta and call your mother at 2 AM and wondering if you're having a mental breakdown or are possessed by Sephiroth.

Lazard: I can't fire any of you, but I'm about to start setting things on fire.

[happypotato48]

Wandee Goodday EP 5 Unhinged Tangant Thoughts

Finally it's brainrot saturgay. we're back with a dumb homo, himbo bisexual, the cutest domestic hubbies in existence, tired acesexual eyebrows, and dr. 666 himself (i still can fix him!)

Well well well if it isn't the look of a dumb whore who is in too deep with this fake relationship. Dee i know you already imagine a nice big house with 2.5 kids, 2 dogs and 1 cat future with this man... oh wait that's me nvm then.

i bet Yak also remembers how many HJs, BJs, and all the other Js he received.

Oh hi baby i've missed you so much. now save these morons from themselves with the power of poorly made sextumes.

You took too long, now your candy's gone, that's what happened!

He's so happy how well his sextumes are received. Ahhhhhhh! he so cute! i can't, i RAK him so much, this eyebrows is my everything.

ตาคิ้วหนาาาา!!

I will be joining @lurkingshan in the recovery ward of saint framboise, hospital for the gays and the gals. and i'm expect many more will be joining us soon. for this scene is a mass casualty incident.

Why are you both still has thoes things on your heads. my first instinct in this kind of situation is probably to get rid of the very noticible kinky headband on my head. forking amatures.

Kawaii Dick!! i name him dick-kun.

Karma sure is a funny bitch. her comedic timing is impeccable.

God bless this mess.

Ok this show finally made me cave in and bought that tacky elapant pants that i used to associated with foreign tourists. turn out they are very comfy. man, i shouldn't let white people dictated my fashion sense. live and learn i guess.

Speaking of fashion sense. this look is definitely not working for you Yak.

Can you blame him! i too would be this cray if i have someone as hot as Yei as my bf.

My money is on a loan shark. i will forgive you for this one lie, Oye.

I have to remind myself sometime that i was not like other kids. cause i definitely would be bored out of my mind with this kind of stuff as a kid.

Two dick jokes in a row. NICE!

I can still fix him! no really i can i just need the right tools.

I love that even though i saw these two fucked each other nasty before. the anticipation of them kissing is still very much present.

This is a nice intermediate ep, not a lot happened but we get to spent more time with Yak and Dee growing their 100% not fake Boyfriendship. they had both met each others close families, very involved in each other lives. and emotionally supported each other. they're good together and they started to realized that. the many looks of Dee "oh shit" is already gave me all the angsts. and from the preview shit totally gonna hits the fan next ep and i can't wait for someone (hopefully Ai Phi Ter) to get punch.

[deliciousangelfestival]

You can totally ignore my idea lol but what about a fluffy/angsty fic about Steve Rogers or Bucky Barnes being turned into a baby/toddler by Tony on accident. But because they are babies they just want to be around and held by “Y/N” and get mad or throw a cute tantrum from lack of attention or if someone tries to hit on their “Y/N”. You can ignore this if it sounds idk weird or dumb lol but I thought it would be cute like they can’t hold back there affection for them while in baby form and when they turn back they are like well shit.. lmao

(PS: the fanart here is from Alexa_520 on Twitter I’m not sure if she has a tumblr but in case you or anyone wants to see it for yourself)

This is so cute!!!

Thank you for the idea. Here it goes. The story has little angst a bit. 

Zero Crush.

Summary: Y/N was on her way to go out for her day off. However, her plan got interrupted because the AI told her something at the lab. You almost lose your mind seeing both of your bosses turn into babies. 

And now, she has to watch them. Y/N is okay with kids, but the problem is she has a little crush towards Captain America and The Winter Soldier. 

Character: Steve Rogers x platonic!reader, Bucky Barnes x platonic!reader

Warning: If you squint a bit, there’s a little angst. 

Main Masterlist || Buy me Ko-fi please 🥹

Drawing of baby Steve and Rogers : Drawing 1, Drawing 2, Drawing 3

It's been a long time for Steve and Bucky to cry, even for crying their heart out to release all their feelings through tears. 

“Waaaaa!”

“Aah…Ahh!”

The rest of the Avengers rubbed their eyes. They couldn't believe the strongest soldiers standing tall before, were shorter than them.

Steve and Bucky have turned into babies. They were standing too close to Tony and Bruce's new invention. 

The high IQ bros try to copy the Pym-particles to shrink and increase an object.

"What kind of machine is that, Tony?!" Natasha pushed Tony away while he was still in shock. 

"I'm trying to make a quantum machine like Ant-man. Look, it works!!! The box got small.” Tony pointed at the test object.

"Yeah, it’s obvious the zone needs to get fixed." Natasha carried Bucky to her arm. At the same time, Steve was taken by Clint. Steve wants to push Clint away because he stinks. 

Bucky did the same towards Natasha; her perfume was too strong. Natasha couldn't help it since she just returned from her mission, and Clint was training when Tony called him.

Tony shook his head. "If Steve and Bucky didn't stand near the test object, they wouldn't get transformed." 

Natasha wants to punch him. "You..!!"

All the adults are pointing at each other. At the same time, Steve and Bucky were confused. Since they're shorter than everyone and the mood in the room doesn't feel good, it makes them uncomfortable.

"Uuh…"

All of them stop arguing because they suddenly hear a sobbing voice.

"Hey, guys? Is everything alright?" You were preparing to go out since today is your day off. Before putting on sunscreen, F.R.I.D.A.Y informed you that something happened at the lab.

Nobody answered you, but from their face, you could say they were nervous.

Then you saw that Natasha and Clint have a baby in their arms. 

"Ooh, so cute. Clint, you have a twin? Congrats." You know Clint is a family man, but it’s new for him to bring his kids to the headquarters. 

Clint chuckled. "Y/N, you don't recognise him?"

"Huh?" 

After he said that, you did notice something that felt familiar, but you can tell what it was. Blond hair, blue eyes, straight nose. Then you turn to Natasha. The baby has black hair and vibranium arms. 

You gasped, “Oh my god!”

"Yaa! Yaa!" Steve stretched his short arms towards you. Clint gently put Steve on your arm. 

“Why did you give him to me?” You nervously hold Steve. Even though he’s a baby now, he is still your boss. You turned to Tony. "You better fix this!!"

"On it."

Bucky saw Steve get carried by you. And he wants it, too. "Ahh…" He pulled Natasha's shirt and pointed at you. 

"Even in baby form, you can't be separated from your best friend?"

After everyone stops panicking, Tony wears his Iron suit and buys kid's clothes; perhaps he wants to run away. Bruce is fixing the machine, Clint went home to get toys for Steve and Bucky, and Natasha is helping you. 

But you know Natasha just returned after a 3-month mission, and from her eyes, you could see she's damn tired. So you told her to rest. 

In the end, there are two babies in your arms. You learn that Steve and Bucky are two years old and can walk alone. 

You put them on the couch while you went to the fridge to make warm milk for them. You're not nervous taking care of little kids since you always cared for nieces and nephews before being accepted as a SHIELD agent.

But you’re nervous since you have a little crush towards your idols. 

You're relieved to see milk inside the fridge. When you turn around to search for a pan, you're shocked not to see the two babies on the sofa.

Where are they?

Then you feel someone is watching you. You looked and saw Steve and Bucky looking at you. 

You lean down and speak softly towards them, "I'm making warm milk for you both. Do you want some?"

Steve and Bucky nodded at the same time. With their fluffy cheeks and small body-like dumplings, you wouldn't believe they're the same boss who is deadly and righteous at the same time. You patted their head gently. 

When the milk has warmed up, you give it to both. Steve and Bucky drink the warm milk. They widened their eyes when they tasted it. It's delicious. 

In their eyes, you're the person they could look up to. You never raised your voice, and you gave them a delicious drink. 

Is this what it feels like to have a big sister? 

After 30 minutes, Tony returned with shopping bags from the kid's store. 

"Give me the clothes. It needs to be cleaned first before they wear it." You received the bag from Tony. You look inside the bag and see there are pyjamas too. 

"I'm going to the laundry room. Could you watch them for a while?"

"Sure."

Steve and Bucky didn't want to be left alone with Tony. Their short legs immediately run after you. Then, each of them hugs each of your legs.

Your body froze. You looked down at the little boys who held your legs, their two big eyes looking at you intensely. 

You knew they didn't want to be left alone at this moment. "Umm, Tony, could you do the dirty laundry instead?"

Tony nodded his head. "Yup, the message is clear: both hate me." 

Since then, both Steve and Bucky have followed you everywhere. They helped you when you made lunch. They wash all the veggies. 

You chuckled, even though they turn into kids, they are always helping. 

But no matter what, they're just a kid who needs attention. You learned that when eating together with them. 

When you help to feed Bucky because of his metal arm, it doesn't seem like he can control his body. 

Steve doesn't like to see Bucky get all your attention. He starts to make a noise and drops his spoon. "Ah..ahhh..."

Because of that, you feed them in turns. 

And before they go to sleep, you want to read a bedtime story. You thought this would be easy since they didn't take a nap. 

You were wrong. First, it was Steve's book choice; then, it was Bucky's. You should've said only one story but couldn't say no to them.

When they fell asleep, you slowly went out of the room. Finally, you could breathe. Even though you like kids, it takes time and energy. 

But at least because of this, your secret crush towards your bosses is gone. Like 50% gone. 

Before you join the Avengers, your HR has told you to keep everything professional. It's impossible not to like Captain America and The Winter Soldier.

At first, you saw them cute. But because their crying and whining hurt your eardrum, it shattered their perfect image in your brain. 

You don't think you could wait for another day. You could handle terrorists, pirates, and aliens, but not kids. You wish Tony and Bruce could finish the machine quickly.

It took three days to fix the machine. When Steve and Bucky return to their old self, they fall asleep to get checked first. After two hours, they finally woke up and searched for you. 

"Ooh, you're looking for Y/N? I gave her a week off after caring for both of you."

Yes, you do. When Bruce said the machine worked fine without side effects, you immediately left the building and went to a bar. 

At the bar, you gulped the second glass of beer. You sighed heavily since you realised you needed the strongest alcohol to erase the image from your mind of baby Steve Rogers and baby Bucky Barnes when they're crying, nagging and pulling your hair. 

Their perfect image in your mind has been destroyed.

Drawing of baby Steve and Rogers : Drawing 1, Drawing 2, Drawing 3

Main Masterlist || Buy me Ko-fi please 🥹

[bunny-yan]

Okay but the hacker and AI made me actually laugh out loud when I reached the end, I was not expecting a comedy sprinkled into my yandere soup today 😆 I'd love to see more of their dynamic if you're inclined to continue with that story. They've got this great bickering, snarky energy between them, like two coworkers who really do not like each other but have to remain relatively civil because they work together.

I think it’s because half of our hacker yan’s personality is sarcasm and he unintentionally teaches this to Eve. It can get pretty annoying for him when it learns how to use sarcasm, but not understanding the full implications of how it comes off.  TW: language

—

“Excuse me?”

You looked up from your phone to see a guy. It was odd how unassuming he was, wearing a dark hoodie on a day as hot as it was with a cap and a mask. 

“I’m really sorry to bother you, but I lost my phone, and I was wondering if I could borrow yours to call someone I know.”

You smiled and he felt as if his heart would skip a beat. He bit his lip, begging himself not to lose control. 

Your hand extended out, offering your phone without even bothering to pull up the app he needed. How trusting. 

You shouldn’t have been. 

He took the phone from your hands, feeling something tingle inside his chest as his fingers brushed against your own, but he had to calm himself down. He couldn’t pass out without doing what he needed to. It wouldn’t take long, but he was trying hard not to appear suspicious. 

It was fucking hot in this dumbass hoodie, and the mask and hat weren’t helping, but he didn’t want to tip you off on who he was. It was too embarrassing to face you just yet. 

He couldn’t pull up a tracking app and set it up on your phone with you standing there staring at him, but it was tempting on the off chance that he messed up. 

Oh god, you were looking at him. You made light conversation, making him think that maybe there was a chance to distract you long enough to-

No, no, it would have to happen remotely. 

Pulling up the phone app, he typed in his number before pressing the call button. His phone was silent in his pocket, having checked repeatedly that it was on do not disturb before he approached you. It would blow fucking everything if his phone rang, and he had to come up with some dumb fucking reason of how he didn’t realize that he had his phone the first time. He made a show of being annoyed when the person on the other line didn’t pick up. Attempting to call again, but adding a few special characters that would trip the program’s sensor to provide a connection between your phone and his. 

Did he feel bad? 

Sure.

It wasn’t your fault you were getting hacked. You were just a kind unsuspecting stranger who had the misfortune of running into him on a day he was feeling particularly shitty. But instead of being an asshole like half of the people he’d run into that same day, you were considerate. Squeezing his arm as you offered an apology, he felt something swell as he stared at this stranger who’d managed to move his stubborn heart.

He’d only known you for two hours, not even sure of your name, but he was desperate to know more about you—your hobbies, the things you liked, the things you didn’t, what you preferred to do in your free time, how many kids you wanted, what season you preferred to get married in. 

Maybe he was moving a little fast, but that’s what was so great about love. 

This was one-sided, but as soon as he scraped up every piece of information he could about you, came up with the perfect plan to approach you, knew what you liked, and imbued every inch of himself with your ideas of an ideal partner, he would execute the perfect first meeting, and things would fall into place from there. 

When your screen turned grey, he couldn’t help the smile that twitched from behind the mask he wore. He exited out of the program, deleting his number, before returning your phone to you. No different than when he handed it to you. 

He thanked you before speeding off like something was biting at his heels. 

He was nervous; he thought his lungs would collapse, that he’d say something stupid and that you’d regard him as a weirdo you never wanted to meet again, but thankfully, none of that happened. He was a little nervous that he wouldn’t set it up in time, that you’d decide to go home before he could figure out how to implement the program, and that he would have to follow you home and stake out your house until he could have another chance encounter with you, but things were looking up. 

He’d gain everything there was to know about you, learning everything he could about the budding new love of his life. He felt giddy, wondering what he’d learn, what kind of person you were. If he’d uncover gold the deeper he searched or found something he didn’t like. You didn’t seem like the type of person who posted provocatively, but it didn’t really matter. He could always dispose of the things he didn’t want others to see and keep them for himself. If he uncovered a significant other, it wouldn’t be hard to convince you of their infidelity. 

He was excited to unearth everything he could find about you as he slowly ingratiated himself into your life, and he knew the perfect program to help him do it. 

[teaboot]

Since I've seen many posts about people missing how common asks used to be, I have been trying to send to more asks to engage more. I really don't want to bother anyone though so I'd love to know if you enjoy receiving asks and if so what kind of asks. Detailed? Vague? Work? Fandom? Movies? Books? Childhood? Gardening? Thoughts? OTPs? OCs? I'm sure there are way more categories, I'm not limiting you to these listed options. Perhaps if it's an easier question what types of asks do you not like?

pPAAASGGFYGGJIK THANK YOU?

Detailed asks good yes

Vague asks??? Do not understand but open to the concept

Fandom: My first Fandom was X-Men, then Lord of the Rings, then Homestuck, Transformers, Fullmetal Alchemist, Teen Wolf, Avengers (first movie, when it came out), Batman, Overwatch briefly, Mass Effect, Gravity Falls, Trigun, and now my sister's getting me into Call of Duty! Feel free to ask about any!!

Movies: Yes movies are a great topic I have SO MANY

Oh lord I haven't consistently been up to date on books in FOREVER but yes books are good, you can ask book questions, I'm reading a lot of old classics and recently finished Pride & Prejudice, am now on The One That Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest

Childhood- oh my god bud you have no idea

Gardening- My house is full of plastic plants on account of how good I am at killing things

Thoughts- Always

OTPs YO YES

OCs? YO YEAH GO FOR IT I NEVER TALK ABOUT THEM aaaaah I need to start writing again- I've been working on an urban fantasy for like. God like 7-8 years now

If I don't like an ask I'll just ignore or delete it but not much is off the table. I will not answer where exactly I live, who I am, if I'm a specific person you met, etc. for safety reasons.

I've worked in sex education so I can answer questions on that topic but if you get too personal or abrasive I will not respond.

I'm regularly flooded with donation requests and it's often too hard to figure out which are real and which are scams using stolen legit posts so as a general rule I do not spread those, I'm sorry.

And if you pop in to sexually harass me or use abusive language towards myself or others then I'm just gonna block you and delete the message.

If you want to warn me that a post I shared came from a bad source I do appreciate that, but if I do my research and can't find a legitimate reason to block someone then I probably won't.

I consider Legitimate Reasons to block someone on recommendation to be abusive language and behaviour, threats, bigotry, propagation of misinformation, production of AI content, and encouragement of dangerous behaviors that pose genuine harm to self or others. I'm not gonna block a random cause they enjoy Steven Universe and you think it's annoying. We all like stuff.

Womp-womp.

Thanks for asking!!! I probably shoulda talked about some of this myself, lol

EDIT: Terfs and radfems are block on sight, it's not your fault you're dumb but I am not capable of educating all of you

[sapphicnsh]

bro oh my fucking god i HATE AI ART!! when i look up shit it’s all fucking dogshit ass ai art with that horrible fucking “rendered” look to it fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you!!!! WHEN I LOOK UP “CUTE ANIME GIRL POSES” I WANT ACTUAL ART DRAWN BY HUMANS AND SHIT SO I CAN GET INSPIRATION NOT YOUR FUCKING UGLY ASS OVER-RENDERED RING LIGHTING BULLSHIT!!!!!!!!

i was looking for this one specific “dumb anime girl pose” where they’re like :0 with their finger to their mouth but of course when i google shit like that ALL OF IT IS FUCKING AI ART

AND NONE OF IT IS THE POSE I WANT BC AI ART IS LIKE “cute curious playful silly dumb shy anime girl” SO IT JUST POISONS EVERYTHING

[iguessitsjustme]

I don't think any of y'all watch The Circle but I am absolutely DYING at the episodes that dropped today. And the only people I know that watch it are coworkers so I gotta wait until tomorrow to really talk about it but oh my god. I gotta say this or I will explode. Under the cut to spare y'all:

Mad, mad respect for Caress for making the right move and sacrificing herself. She knew where she stood and she truly went out in the best possible way. I hope she finds nothing but blessings in her life.

I think the way the show is being edited is indicating that Kyle is gonna win it. I hope he does. He has been nothing but loyal and honest to everyone (aside from the fact he's married but that's no problem because Liv isn't exactly honest either)

I HATE Jordan. First of all, get your shoes off the bed wtf. You sleep there. I also get that he's good for tv or whatever because he's brings the drama but that is literally not what anyone likes about the circle. We like the genuine connections that people build in there. We like when the show is wholesome. And he came in and just decided Myles sucked and was manipulating everyone? Because what? People liked him? When he was going around lying about everything? That boy still has insecurities he hasn't fully worked through and is projecting that onto Myles.

I will be so sad if QT goes because she is genuinely such a good player. She's kind but also realistic and she keeps it real with her people that they're playing a game. I'm glad she left that influencer chat with Jordan because she was right. If she blocked anyone he wanted to block, she would look like she can't be trusted. She would be the next one gone. Because Jordan would have been safe since he was the secret influencer, he had no issues gunning for her people. And trying to tell her that her strategy is bad because she doesn't want to break every alliance she has in one fell swoop? He's dumb.

I hope Liv gets rid of Jordan but the smart move would be blocking QT and I honestly think QT would respect her for it. I don't know if QT would throw shade at Liv being a catfish or not though. That is if they make Liv block face to face which is what they've always done in the past so I don't see why they would stop now.

I am happy to see Liv makes it to the finals. I've been up and down with Liv but I do like her and think she deserves to be in the finals. Or he deserves it I guess. Go Brandon.

I want Kyle to win. Out of everyone left, I want him to win. Myles is my favorite but I think Kyle winning would be the sweetest moment.

Jordan can kiss my ass.

I do want Lauren to make it to the finals. I wish she had been in any other season cause I think the AI twist hurt her a lot and she would have been able to build actual connections with actual people which is what I watch the show for.

No seriously. Jordan makes me so mad. All he had to do was literally none of what he did. Why did he come in so nasty? Has he seen the show? Those people never win. Never.

I do feel bad for Autumn and I think if she had come in earlier and had a chance to talk to Myles they could have been friends. I do not know why I think this but I think they would have been friends.

[xxstraykidsaikoxx]

ᴛʀɪᴀɴɢʟᴇ ʟᴏᴠᴇ || ᴄʜᴀɴɢʙɪɴ (sᴛʀᴀʏ ᴋɪᴅs) ɴɪɴᴛʜ!ғ ᴍᴇᴍʙᴇʀ

It's a special ferret boys' birthday! And two very special people are dying to give him the most special gift one could receive! But what happens when these two happen to be fated rivals for the ferrets love, and when this special gift suddenly goes missing?

ෆ contents - cursing towards the end, drags on a bit, arguing, fluff, crack?, kinda lazy writing

ෆ word count - 903

ෆ notes - can you tell i ran out of ideas 😭 i really tried my best with this one i swear, its just i dont really know binnie as well as the other members but that doesn't mean i dont love him im ot8 i promise🤞

"When are you going to accept my feelings, Hyunjin-a.." Came the flirtatious words of a certain pig-rabbit. The latter braced himself for what he knew was about to happen. A well aimed plastic water bottle flew across the room and hit Casanova on his shoulder, "Ow! Okay that one was uncalled for, Ai!" The smirking maknae broke into a fit of giggles as she, once again, foiled Changbin's plan for Hyunjin's affections. Ever since Hyun and Ai had been confirmed to be dating, the interactions between the two and Changbin have become comedy gold. As previously mentioned, the rapper does any thing and everything to "flirt" with Hyunjin, from making comments, to romantic gestures, and even preventing other people, including Hyun's own girlfriend from stealing his affections. Obviously this is all a joke, Changbin would never do something so heinous, so Aiko never took is seriously and even bought into the joke. Now the three have become involved in some sort of love triangle.

Outside of fighting for Hyunjin's love, Changbin and Aiko often had small quarrels about other small things, not as much as Ai does with other members, but enough to earn a eyeroll from anyone within earshot. "I thought you had it!" "No! Chan told me you had it!" "Well obviously it's not in my hands, so why do you think I have it?!" "Guys! Arguing about it isn't going to find it!" Another day, another petty kindergarten argument. But it wasn't just a normal day, it was Hyunjin's birthday! And for the ferrets special day, Aiko and Changbin decided to pitch in and get a gift for him from the both of them. An art set that had a lot of supplies Hyunjin had been wanting for his artwork. They had both bought it and decided to give it to Channie to hold onto, because they were aware that one of them would be dumb enough to lose it. And they did.

"Hyunjin's party is in 30 minuets, what are we going to do? Show up with no gift?!" Aiko panicked, she personally didn't like it when things didn't go to plan, especially when it came to the love of her life's birthday. "Well, we'll just go out looking for it! It's not like it grew legs and walk away!" Changbin suggested, hopeful as always. "You're making it sound like that's what it did! Ugh, let's go look where Chan said he put it, it couldn't be far from there." The pair set off to the confined room, desperate to find the gift to prove who loved Hyunjin most once and for all.

While the two desperately searched, Hyunjin had already arrived. "Where's Ai and Changbin?" Hyunjin had asked, noticing the absence of his most valued admirers. "Oh! They're looking for a gi-" "They're looking for something! Don't worry, they'll be here shortly!" Han quickly hushed Chan, persistent on keeping the gift a secret. Hyunjin obviously didn't buy the act but obliged, he turned away and looked around, waiting to see what the two were doing, hoping that they weren't killing eachother in the process.

"Dammit! We're 30 minuets late looking for this cursed ass gift, we should just give up and show up fuckin' empty handed!" Aiko had enough, clearly, and her mouth spoke faster than what her brain could think. As his younger companion cursed angrily to herself in one corner of the room, Changbin searched frivolously, hoping to any God out there that he'd find this gift. Not only for himself, but for both Hyunjin and Aiko. "You don't think Chan hid it.. right?-" Aiko suspected, it was the only other explanation. "No, Chan isn't like that, there has to be another way this happened. The two sat against the wall in silent defeat, wondering what the hell they were going to do. Both had too much humility and guilt to just show up to one of their closest friend's party empty handed. As they sat in self pity, Aiko looked around and noticed pieces of paper and a few markers scattered around the nearby table, had someone.. set this up? "Oppa, I have an idea." Aiko got up to grab the paper from the table. Changbin looked over to see Ai start folding the paper the several ways. It didn't take long for Changbin to realize what she was doing, "Oh my god you're a genius! Let me get some too!" The two giggled to themselves and hurried to make their newest plan.

Downstairs, a certain birthday boy was still waiting for one of his closest friend and love of his life (though one can argue is both of them) make their way to the party that was slowly dying out. Without two of the loudest members there it was left to Han and Felix to keep up the mood. A sudden burst open of a door made everyone jump as the long awaited Dweakki-Cat duo loudly made their way to the party an hour late. "JAGI! LOOK WHAT I MADE FOR YOU! IT WAS MY IDEA!" Aiko exclaimed as she showed Hyunjin what she did, before being shoved aside by her more stronger older brother, "Nonsense! Mine are clearly more expertly crafted!- Ow!-" Changbin yelped as Aiko kicked him from below. As the two once again started they're usual banter, a fond smile was placed on Hyunjin's face, They had made him paper hearts.

©straykidsaiko

Always keep in mind that nothing in this series and in my posts are real! So anything that may seem 'out of character' should be considered as part of a fake universe! <3

ᴍᴀsᴛᴇʀʟɪsᴛ

[stem-sister-scuffle]

STEM SISTER SCUFFLE: ROUND 1 MASHUP 14

Elisabet Sobeck (Horizon games) vs Jade Harley (Homestuck)

Elisabet Sobeck is a Roboticist!

Jade Harley is a Nuclear Physicist!

Why you should vote for each contestant:

Elisabet Sobeck:

"She used her exceptional skill and intelligence to combat the world's destruction by the hands of a greedy billionaire."

"Saved the world"

"She created world-saving technology."

"ohh my god where do I start. ok first of all she is (was) like the only sane one on her project. this bitch ass trillionaire accidentally caused the apocalypse bc he's a dumb bitch and she literally led a project in order to re-terraform the world and continue humanity, just to make sure they didn't literally go /extinct/. also, the main character aloy is a sorta clone of her, which is cool. OH SHE'S A HOMO!!! in the second game a character is revealed to be like ~1000 years old and was actually her gf for some time before that character left to go on a space expedition and they split up. the credits song for the second game reads like an angsty gay love(?) song from elisabet's pov. to me at least. she makes me so unwell"

"She's a genius roboticist and AI programmer whose heart is just as important as her brain. She creates (under IMMENSE time pressure) an AI that can not only design its own robots and crack codes and terraform, but has its own feelings and cares about the world as much as Elisabet does. She makes some hard, cruel choices but it really is always for the best. She's even gay"

Jade Harley:

"She's soo fun and silly and her symbol is literally an atom. she regularly irradiates steak to feed her weird dog"

"She and her nuclear powered dog creating a new universe. she's cool"

"Built a modded bass guitar that's only playable when she's in her robot form and has extra arms. Became a doggirl. She also plays the flute :)"

"i think you have enough ramblings about her already but i couldnt NOT submit her, she is so dear to me <3"

"bbg has THREE scientific specialties!! she genetically modifies plants and makes them grow beautifully high just because she can and loves science. in her alpha timeline she’s a tech mogul and creates technology that challenges the evil empress that brought earth to ruin. AND she’s a furry"

"Doggy"

"She plays a silly flute refrain. She's a furry. Literally, she's a doggirl. She's also a god and created the universe. JADE BEST GIRLIE!!!!"

[senlinyu]

Sen! Just say ur tweet about ur writing and of course no pressure but are you okay sharing anything about ur writing so far? I’ll read anything you write but what can we readers look forward to (themes, ideas?)

Oh god. At the moment the main thing I'm working on is this sci-fi fantasy where some people have a special type of elemental resonance that allows them to perform alchemy, and they're fighting a war against a group of immortal alchemists who use human transmutation to reanimate the dead. Its a little bit of a Full Metal Alchemist meets Jade City meets The Locked Tomb meets Sen's diaspora and religious trauma. Although I actually hadn't read Jade City or The Locked Tomb series when I originally outlined the idea. LMAO.

And then I have two dessert projects, one is a fantasy about a witch who grows up cut off from witch culture inventing her own methods of practicing magic and accidentally disturbs a god. And the other is a sci-fi about a sentient spy android who's being hunted down by an assassin cyborg after an international law is finally passed liberating sentient ai's from indenture.

It all sounds dumb when I write it down in a way that's void of spoilers, but it's very interesting in my head.

I very much have time to be working on all of these things. /lies

[adastra121]

…I have a silly idea. A question for your Touchstarved OCs! How many times in the demo would they have met an untimely end? How do you predict them dying in the future?

So, not necessarily predicting how the MC will die in the routes, just wondering what doom looks like for your OC in particular.

I’ll start:

Luneth the Unnamed

She does pretty well in the demo, actually, the only time she might have died is by Leander after he grabs her cursed hand, but he’s “perfectly fine” so everything’s a-okay. Right?

The Senobium, probably. Trusts institutions over individuals. Would submit herself to experimentation for the greater good.

Vere. If their enmity grows, it could end in bloodshed and since she isn’t a fighter, her odds don’t look good.

There’s not a lot here, I expect her to be the MC who actually survives. Let’s go final girl!

Jin the Alchemist

Soulless. Boy spends his days studying and conducting alchemical experiments, he does not exercise enough to outrun a Soulless creature before Mhin gets there.

Leander. He trusts him so much.

Ais. If Ocudeus makes him lose control, Jin isn’t going to win a fight against him, and I don’t think he’ll be able to outrun him, either..

The Senobium. He too would submit himself to experimentation for the greater good. Compared to Luneth who’d be like, “This is my purpose. This is how I contribute to the world,” though, he’d probably view it more as a deserving punishment for being a monster. He has to be restrained somehow because he is made to hurt, and there is no redemption for that.

Mentor. I can see a path where he leaves Eridia and returns to her. He already has doubts about his decision to flee. Would let her take his life to keep others safe.

Seaspring. Would drink from it after losing all hope for another cure.

Alon the Hound Oh boy...

Vere. “Call me a dog again, and I’ll make you bleed.” “You got it, bitch! :D”

Vere. Booped the snoot of his monster form.

Vere. After trying to prank him with static electricity — look, it was Ais’s fault for giving them the idea of Vere’s tail frizzing up. Can you just picture Vere with a hand on that static electricity ball in the science centres? POOFY VERE XD

Vere. After drawing a portrait of Vere for his Senobium employee of the month picture (he is not employee of the month). They’re not really an artist. It looks like she’s insulting him. It amused Kuras before they died, though, so. Worth it.

Vere. Tried to serenade him. *strums lute badly* “I love you, bitch.”

Vere. Said directly to his face, “Sometimes I wonder how I taste haha.”

Vere. After trying to pick his pockets.

Vere. Surrendered.

Ocudeus. Tried fighting it.

Ocudeus. Tried flirting with it.

Ocudeus. Tried eating it.

Ocudeus. Tried flirting with it again.

Ocudeus. Tried to pick its pockets. And no, the eldritch kraken does not have any pockets, you dumbass—

Ais. “Trust me bro, I got this.” After asking him to help them with the famous magic trick that involves catching a deadly projectile in her mouth. I don’t know, I just feel like they'd enable each other with dumb shit.

Leander. Drank his poisoned punch on a dare. See the above.

Kuras. When judgement comes for their soul, I feel like she’d annoy the gods into smiting them.

Kuras. Ate his cooking. They’re the kind of person to eat rice raw and try to cook it by drinking boiling water. How much more dangerous could the doctor’s cooking be—

Senobium. They’d have a contentious relationship with the Senobium in every route, so the academy would take no issue with killing the thief. Probably via Vere.

Senobium. There is at least one universe in the demo where they made the split second decision to swipe that Senobium cleric’s keys and attempt to break Vere out. Spontaneous jail break wooooooo! They’d fail horribly, of course, but I know that there’s at least one alternate universe where she would do that.

Seaspring. Gave into their impulses and cannonballed into the Seaspring. Though who else lowkey wants to swim in the forbidden soup?

Mhin. Would sooner choose to die than kill their friend. So if Mhin loses control and running’s not an option…Damn, there’s so much they wanted to do with them. They wanted to make them laugh more. They wanted them to teach her about alchemy because it seems to make them happy. They still haven’t told them the secret to that one magic trick they could never pick apart and she knows how that’s been driving them crazy, even though they pretend they don’t care, even though they always care more than they let others know, it’s one of the reasons she—She never got to tell them. Ah, well. They’ll figure it out without her. She knows they will.

Please feel free to reblog with your OCs' death count/causes of death predictions!