#the dm is like “yeah it's a happy ending” cuz no one other than the “antag” died and the other named npcs survived but

[eiseryn]

Rest

When Lei and Ceres were working for Prism corp, they were not given breaks and had to find time to set their own breaks (often impossible). This moment I drew might have only lasted 5 minutes. But in that time, they were truly comfortable around each other. They were at peace and able to be rest in the presence of each other's company.

It is unfortunate... that the time they spent was transient. If Lei had known, this memory would be one of her bygone days... she would have savoured it longer 😭😭😭

(insert lots of crying noises about

This is actually a redraw of an older piece I don't like so I'm not going to post it. But I like this much better than the old piece! Hopefully in another 6 months or something I'll redraw it to be even better cuz I whipped this out in 1.5 hours on a stressful day so I already see some mistakes LOL

But it is simply too cute not to share 😤

[w0w0zella]

So i tried to map out the description of the fight and came back with some questions (sorry for any misinterpretation)

How does Joe sweep Bugbo's leg? Does he push him away and does something or is he really flexible?

Why does hoppo side with Bugbo?

How did the argument begin? Does Joe confront bugbo? How would the argument go?

Why does Bugbo try to take the notepad away from Joe?

Does Bugbo feel bad about Gerbo?

Bugbo's personal thoughts on the situation?

When did Joe's shirt fall off during the fight?

Brief description of the fight?

Here's the process of you wanna know

Thank you so much for answering my asks^^^^I'm sorry if I was a pain to deal with

Thanks!

HI okay. THANK YOU FOR YOUR DEDICATION TO THIS AU. you honestly have more dedication to it than me lol i am sorry if any of the info is Wrong or Fucked up, i dont really think the lore through i just go with whatever feels the most correct in the moment. thank you so much also this is going to be a long post (one that i already had to write Once And it DELETED ITSELF) so my apologies

"How does Joe sweep Bugbo's leg? Does he push him away and does something or is he really flexible?"

i did a little Drawing of this just for you friend

basically its the classic Pinned to the ground with legs on either side of him,, Until bugbo gets cocky. puts one leg up to get a better grip,, and Boom. joe uses whatever is left of his Brain power to do this so

"Why does hoppo side with Bugbo?"

i just think that hoppo is better friends with bugbo and gerbo than with joe. i think that if she came back and saw what had happened, she'd assume that it was joe's fault somehow. "How did the argument begin? Does Joe confront bugbo? How would the argument go? Why does Bugbo try to take the notepad away from Joe?" i dont really know any specifics, but i have this plot outline that might help ^_^

"Does Bugbo feel bad about Gerbo?"

he does feel bad that he's Gone,, but he doesnt really think he's at fault. hes kinda in denial about it. like he knows that he did something Incorrect but hes pushing it away cuz he thinks he's this Perfect role model or smth

"Bugbo's personal thoughts on the situation?"

honestly? i have no idea. he's a really fucked up character and its hard to tell how he's feeling so. Come up with it yoyurself,,,. (big heart emoji)

"When did Joe's shirt fall off during the fight?"

it doesnt "fall off" per se, its more like. he loses his tie and the button up becomes open. i think that during the fist fight, bugbo either grabs joe by his shirt which causes the buttons to open, or punches him in a way that Nicks his shirt and makes it open and then the tie becomes undone when bugbo starts choking him.

honeslty i didnt think it through super well cuz i mostly just like the idea of joe looked all rugged and fucked up at the end of the fight and having his shirt open and tie missing was the best way i could convey that.

"Brief description of the fight?"

i think i've already written a couple of these and theyre. ss. somewhere on the bugbo murderstuck tag. apologies, i do not have the energy to write another one right now lol. just a note, a lot of the time between bugbo meeting up with joe face to face and the physical fight starting is just bugbo and joe dissociating while standing next to each other. they arent always communicating.

and yeah the meat cleaver Does just come out of no where. Wateverm. Fuckin. Its cool. lol

THANK YOU FOR THE ASKS MAN,, you can straight up just dm me on tumblr or discord if you want more info, im more than happy to provide. thank you so much :D

[slimesaurian]

im gonna go on a rant in a sec. I'll try to cycle back and edit the top here to cw the post but if it takes too long and I forget or end up missing some im sorry

so a friend of mine just got outed to her ultra religious parents by her fucking shitty ex. it really fucking sucks and I so badly want to [redacted] the dude who did it. It especially sucks because like, I befriended this gal maybe a year into transition and she was still closeted/figuring stuff out at the time but would ask me some stuff about transition and I was happy to help. My first "baby trans" of being a woman who was out.

anyways her boyfriend seemed okay on twitter, tbh was always a bit annoying but then again who am I to judge. Our interactions were alright and it was just neat having some moots. Then twitter shat the bed and I made a lil friend server on discord for people I liked. I ended up sending a invite to both cuz they expressed interest and unfortunately the annoying vibes from boyf were correct. Dude would ping her in the server to get him to respond to their dms and say a buncha yikes things. I think he even mentioned being republican or smth which wasnt a hit in the "leftist tranny" discord server. Mostly he made peeps uncomfy but I was hesitant to give the boot to him because of his connection to someone I liked.

Then there was one point where I was in vc with him and baby trans messaged me saying "hey be careful with what you say around him" and then sent me a screenshot after he ended up going on a tirade against her for expressing interest in piercing her nipples at some point

1: bullshit lmao

2: very clearly controlling behavior and an implicit threat

at this point, i basically just stopped interacting with the dude in the server. I very much wanted to kick him, both from the server and irl but I was worried about escalating things and putting my friend in danger so I kinda just bit my tongue. eventually they broke up and I asked whether she'd like me to kick him or not and she told me she I didnt have to if I were comfy with him. I still didnt kick cuz I was worried about retaliation but my man was on thin ice, especially because I had just settled into a new place after fleeing a controlling man so I was not pleased with him.

Anyways then I made a joke about being gay in my sapphic tranny server and he was like "Wait, you like MEN????". Honestly, I had never felt like you could hear a pin drop in a digital space before. Anyways yeah I pulled out the boot after that.

Then dude was insistent on vc'ing me to "talk about what happened" and wouldnt stop messaging me trying to set up this call rather than just explain in text. Honestly I got the vibe this was intentional, I've had too many HR meetings to really buy that shit any more. I decided to entertain him just to get him off my back but then he kept pushing me so I eventually said I'll think about it. dude kept pushing and pushing me over text for updates for the next three days where I honestly just fucking ghosted him because of other life shit. Eventually I caved and told him to give me some space because I needed it and he went off about "Do you see how thats better than no response?" and then went on to talk about how "this issue isnt that big in the first place"

At that point I just never talked to him again. I figured his beef was with me and he has no leverage so I'm safe and hopefully baby trans is safe. Anyways fast forward half a year and god damn this girl has blossomed in the presence of other folks helping her through this stuff (if you end up reading this somehow, love you girl 💗). Unfortunately she learns that shitty ex has told ppl she cheated on him and thats why they broke up (girl absolutely has been too timid to pursue anything since, this is 100% a boldfaced lie. But gosh you rly should ask alex out already). She ends up making a very calm post clearing the air about how this isnt the case and she didnt feel safe around him due to the threat of being outed (above). No @'s, no names, just a simple post.

And then her dad gets a text talking about every little thing that could be used against her, from her caffeine addiction (lmfao) to her not rly being christian and eats weed gummies. Oh and, you know, she "wants to identify as a woman and have started taking drugs for hormone replacement therapy". As an aside, the text mentions she's "been dating a man for a year now" and "have sucked a couple of dicks". but who's dick i wonder 🤔. Also she's "never liked women and is attracted to penises" if this werent so fucking awful id be laughing my ass off.

The text ends with "I'd suggest confronting [deadname] about this since they're clearly out of your control and could learn a lesson about insubordination and respect". Not rly being subtle there bud. Anyways, me and my friends have spent all fucking day making sure our gal is safe and has a place to stay and are emotionally supporting her and I'm just so fucking angry. Her entire life has been uprooted, her autonomy violated, her existence endangered because this fucking prick decided he wants to be a petty motherfucker. For the record, she has temporary housing and is safe right now, but she's going to come out of this with such deep scars.

I think the worst part is, is that he's got a lot of trans women friends/mutuals. He was practically bragging about it in my server. Other trans womrn are in danger around this man and his vindictive rage but I dont have the energy to do anything more than try being there for my friend and help her through this. I'm just angry and sad and worried and tired. I hate this man. I hate people like him. I hate the fact that he will more than likely never face any sort of consequences for ruining someone else's life. I hate that society makes him feel comfortable where he is. I fucking hate.

I'm trying so hard to not succumb to hate and become this jaded feral beast but it's just so hard. its so hard seeing everyone i care about in this fucked up world get hurt over and over and over again. It's so hard seeing all this violence and pain and choosing to fight back with love. Every time someone i love is hurt it feels like a chunk of my flesh is taken along with it. a core of my being is robbed because I need to help. i need to be there. i need to counterract the world. but its not enough and itll never be enough and ill just wear myself thinner and thinner each day until all thats left is my bones bleaching in the sun. but what else can i do? the rabid dog gets put down. i just want to be safe and help my friends be safe and i want us all to live.

i dont know any more.

edit:

I think one of the worst parts is knowing that it's within my power to hurt him back. Like, he's told me the general area where he lives in the past and it's honestly not hard to narrow details down from there if you're dedicated. I could realistically make this fucker fear for his life. But then I'd be one of those radical violent transgenders who dared to bare her teeth at the society that uses and beats and breaks and kills her kind. I have to rise past it. I have to choke this rising bile in my throat back down and be a good girl for a chance to be granted the fucking right to live. I have to sit and feel my heart break and break and break and break and break every single day so some smug white boys won't ever have to experience the fear of god for the slightest moment.

[hangmanbradshaw]

One thing about me is I LOVE spoilers, it never ruins the fun, it just makes me even more excited to see how things play out.

Another thing is that I���ve been wondering about is the title. I absolutely love TS and Paris is probably on my top 5 on midnights. I think it could be from either “pov”, or both (let me explain). I think Bradley fell first, which is why he agreed to the contract in the first place, so I think “I want to brainwash you into loving me forever” would be him saying that he wants to make Jake eventually want to be with him outside of just the contract. Now, Jake fell harder (or will fall harder), yeah he thinks Bradley is hot but he hasn’t allowed himself to even consider the possibility of love. Until some point in the story when he realises he needs Bradley more than he need air (no, it’s not too dramatic), probably after some angst. But Jake doesn’t think Bradley loves him (he does) so he is the one that wants to “brainwash” Bradley into loving him forever. Basically, both of them want to brainwash the other into falling in love with them forever, without realising the other wants the same thing. They are just two idiots in love, your honour.

wow, that was long…

If you ever want some spoilery hints, pop in my DMs and I'm happy to share some secret hints. I have a few things up my sleeve for these remaining chaps and there might be some hidden little hints in the already written chaps ;) I'm honestly not sure what everyone's expecting for the rest of the play out but I'm very excited about what I came up with :D

OKAY TITLE. Yes. I love TS obvi (like it's a problem) so I actually almost titled this 'are you ever dreaming of me' because Delicate is such a theme song for this in my mind. I have a playlist for this fic of specific songs that give the right vibes or remind me of the characters and a lot of it is TS, but Delicate is right there at the top for SO many reasons. BUT I went with Paris because that song is up there too. The idea of this fun relationship where being with them feels like being in their own world, 'no I didn't see the news cuz we were somewhere else', 'i'm so in love i might stop breathing', 'privacy sign on the door and on my page and on the whole world, romance is not dead if you keep it just yours', 'sit quiet by my side in the shade' just this idea of Jake's life being so insane, and Bradley becomes his anchor, his sense of normalcy, his escape from it. The rest of it falls away when they're together. And also vice versa. Bradley wants him to let go of the fame, the stress, his belief that people can't love him, and just be with him. So then you get to 'i want to brainwash you into loving me forever' which is definitely both ways, and you were right on the money with it. This idea that Jake feels he can't have that, but he so badly wants to convince Bradley to love him, to stay. And Bradley, who views Jake as unattainable in some ways for various reasons, wants to convince him to love him too.

Let the only flashing lights be the tower at midnight.

The end :D

That was an essay I'm so sorry. I could write this about every song on that playlist I swear.

[psychelis-new]

I know I kept sending short asks cuz those are at the spur of moment but.

I just wanna express my appreciation towards you.

You're an amazing gift to this community. I started feeling a lil uhhh scared? Reserved? Around you. Maybe cuz it's your theme being monochromatic and very aesthetic, and how you form your words and sentence. It's like... Very well thought out and trying to keep things neutral, which is very opposite of the chaotic me.

However, that aspect of you gives out a peaceful vibe as well. There's a slow sense of secured comfort, where people can just rest here and read your PACs with a cup of tea in hand.

I know we don't really interact much but I think (and feel) that there's a mutual respect that we have with each other. I mean, we do respect each other and other people, but maybe (just maybe) the mutual respect we share is slightly different? It's more than just mutuals, but we can take that further. Can we be closer friends?

So yeah, I think it's the caffeine hitting in the morning but yeah I really wanted to get this out. I hope that things are doing well for you and wish that all good things fall upon you. I await more readings but I also await more random notes/stories or anything that you wanna share. Seeing you on my dashboard just makes me happy!

And I hope you're happy as well! Take care, stay hydrated, stay comfy, and may you get through whatever challenges life throws at you. <3

First of all, thank you Ann! I've been reading this as I woke up but I needed a little time to collect my thoughts (and go training) before answering you: I am not that used to receive so much appreciation from someone heh. This said, let me tell you you made my day: I've been smiling reading through the whole ask. :)

I'm sorry I'm not as good at expressing the emotions I feel as you are. It's something I still have to work on (yay emotional abuse!). Maybe this is what makes me look scary and closed off at first, or maybe it's also cause I don't really take too much part in the community either (not even from my other main account: sorry everyone, I am like this lol I tend do change my mind and follow my guts a lot). It may be because of a not so good experience back when I didn't have good boundaries (which made me come back with pretty strict ones before finding a new balance), and because that's what I realized I should do from the *often implied* feedback I get: people are here for what I can give them in terms of readings and advices or messages, they don't care that much about me as a person (and I accept that ofc! not judging anyone: this blog is about tarots, not about me), so I don't often share much of myself nor I tend to dm to too many people unless I feel there can be mutual interest of any kind.

Differently from you, I'm also pretty introverted I guess lol. But I am very happy that at least in my readings and answers you can find a bit of peace and comfort cause that's what I feel is my main job here and on my other blog too. Trying to help y'all and make you feel understood cause life is pretty stressing, and so it's healing and all, and we all need a break and someone to put a blanket on us sometimes, right?

Anyway, aside from this little explanation I feel I owed everyone in a way...

I would really love to become closer friend with you. I think you are a very talented and outgoing person which I really admire. You call yourself chaotic and for the little I have seen maybe your main blog is (and I am honestly saying this with a smile and lot of love) but Idk, what I feel around you is just a very sweet and deeply good energy. This energy can take any form imo, even the chaotic one, but at the end of the day it doesn't matter: it's what there's at the core that matters. And yours is a funny cute chaotic imo. Which I really appreciate. I wish you to receive lot of love, support, appreciation and hundreds if not more of good things. And that you can be strong through difficulties and trials and just know that if you need even to just vent, here I am :)

Take care, stay safe, stay hydrated you too and be well<3 And okay let's dm lol

[ocularmacdown]

15 questions for 15 mutuals

TYSM @sewerkingcharlie FOR THE TAG !!! i love doing things like this teehee

are you named after anyone?

my legal name is the same as a film/musical character (my parents maintain that wasn’t the entire reason). currently irl i go by just the first letter of that name, but the name i WANT also happens to be a film character (coincidental, but i was happy when i realised)

zoot is the muppet’s band’s saxophonist and i chose him over gonzo (who is technically my fave muppet, beloved thing <3) cuz i also play the sax.

do you have any kids?

nope! and i don’t want any - ofc i can’t predict how future me will feel, but i’ve genuinely never felt/understood the desire to have a child (have felt exactly one paternal pang). still love kids, just not for me!

do you use sarcasm a lot?

i have no idea what’s “a lot”? i enjoy jokes and bits (particularly with my sibling) that usually entail sarcasm, so technically yes, but in a silly/exaggerated way.

first thing you notice about people?

i think i’d say what they’re wearing, cuz personal style can be so cool and varied. general vibe/personality is a close second tho (and ofc first if i’m not physically seeing the person). neurodivergent brain sometimes picks up on vibes TOO much tho-

what’s your eye colour?

like. green? not bright green tho.

scary movies or happy endings?

i’m not really a scary movie watcher*, so happy endings!! small rant, but i’ve noticed people often view happy endings as less inspired than sad/shocking ones, which just is NOT true and really frustrates me. a happy ending can be just as if not more thought provoking and empathetic and realistic !! pls love joy in media more !!

*i have seen all of one horror movie BUT i am a huge fan of uk tv series inside no. 9. it’s so SO good and the only real “scary content” i’ve ever been passionate about.

special talents?

if i lie on my stomach, i can bend my back and legs up and forwards far enough to touch the tip of my nose with my toes :D

what are your hobbies?

drawing and crocheting are the biggest i guess, but i sometimes bake or sew (tho that’s mostly diy-ing rather than big projects). i rly love making bottle cap badges and i used to paint patches too, if that counts. consuming media at a rate of knots is my full time passion /hj.

have any pets?

YES. YES I DO. I COULD GO INTO GREAT DETAIL. IF YOU WANT ME TOO. JUST DM. I WILL SEND YOU AN ESSAY. tldr is i have three cats currently. MY cat, effectively, is a tiny girl cat called (lady) cleo and i adore her <3

what sports to you play/have you played?

as a kid, i swam for several years and was goalkeeper for my school’s girl’s football team for a bit (i was tiny…the uniform and gloves were massive…,), and i always ALWAYS did loads on sports day. did netball in secondary but quit cuz i hated it (the other girls were real assholes) and also badminton after school club (my friend and i just did rallies non competitively, it was great).

i think sport gave me gender euphoria when i was a kid, but as a teen it did the opposite. i’d love to start swimming again in the future and i wanna take up boxing (got some rage to get out my system teehee). i TRY to go to the gym weekly.

how tall are you?

5’4…my mum’s short genes messed up my dad’s average/tall genes :|

favourite subject in school?

DRAMA. always. in primary i loved creative writing, and for the most of secondary i really enjoyed maths. i ADORED geography in secondary (about out 2 my geog teacher….i miss u sir…), but it was too much for me at alevel. i really enjoyed film studies alevel tho!!but yeah. drama forever <3

dream job?

i guess acting ?? but also not ?? i have a very unsteady grasp on what i want my future to look like, and job is not the focus of my plans. i’d love love love to act professionally, but i’d also be just as content with working in cafes forever (what i do currently) and being silly and trans and making art on the internet. i really don’t know. but that’s okay <3

i uhhh don’t have 15 mutuals yet 🧍‍♂️ i will just tag all of y’all tho - u don’t have to participate ofc !!! and i think everyone should do this that wants too !!!

@boodlesofdoodles @beesallhail @cloveclump @cactusfool @certifiedeccentric @angelic-charlie-kelly @emodennis @a-nice-egg-offering

[itmightbeneb]

Practising doesnt do shit if you do the same stuff all the time. The point of "practise" is not "repeat the same action over and over until magically it works", its "try a hundred different things and see what emerges that you end up being okay at". I understand your frustration cuz, fundamentally, i dont think that ppl understand how ppl get better at art. But thats my advice. Try everything at least once, and anything you enjoy, stick with it, try combine it with other things you enjoy.

I always hated blending, it ended up muddy and gross unless i spent hours rendering, which i wasnt prepared to do. So i just. Stopped. I started picking out shapes of light and shade and now thats my main thing.

If you want some specific critique and things you can try, you can dm me if you want, cuz seriously, i understand. All I will say is dont take peoples love for your stuff as a lie just because you dont see the merit in it. People see something in your art. Whether youre happy about it or not, they arent lying . You can take what they see in it, and use that as somewhat of an anchor to change things around

im sorry if this seems rude but you dont think ive tried different things? you dont think ive tried different styles and ideas and methods? do you really think i havent done that?

just because i dont post my art here doesnt mean i dont draw, doesnt mean i havent been ✨artsy✨ since i was a kid

i get that someone having a breakdown seems like they dont know what theyre doing but please dont pretend you know what ive been doing

yeah ive tried different styles and ideas and ways of doing things and the one that worked i fucking hate, like yeah objectively it looks better than everything else. i fucking hate it and deleted all of those pictures

and yeah ive had "friends" lie to me before about stuff like this only to talk shit elsewhere so maybe im not trusting enough because ive been through that before, but when people try to say it feels like theyre really there for a scene without much description, when its just a skeleton of a scene, it definately feels like a lie, like someones complimenting the blending on a flat colour piece for an art example

[privayuna]

Wanna get drunk and nasty?

Genre: Smut

Pairing: Niragi Suguru x Female Reader

Requested by: Anonymous (guys pls don’t put it as anonymous cuz i wanna tag you guys when u request, so if you finna request smth, pls don’t do it anonymously or you could always dm me!)

Warnings: Rough sex, gun play, mentions of rape

Summary: When Niragi learned that you’re equally psychopathic and insane as him, this peaked his interest in you. He’d always follow you, day after day, always offering you a drink at his place. But you’d always decline. After countless times of asking and begging you gave in and went to his place for a drink. Whilst drinking, Niragi proposed a game you two play. A game where you prove who’s more insane, and that game lead to you not walking for an entire week :D

Note: this took longer than what i’d promise ToT i hope you guys enjoy it !!! (i made niragi soft in the end i hope u guys dont mind )

Word count: 2,005

“Ah Y/N, you’ve finally agreed to my long-time offer! Good girl.” He spoke as you opened his bedroom door “Please I only did this so you would stop pestering me.” Closing the door shut. “I can barely find peace anywhere then you’d come barging in my happy place, just to ‘offer me’ a god damn drink” you mumbled to yourself.  “Awe did I annoy you, baby? If you were so bothered with me, then you should’ve just killed me! Come on Y/N, we both know, the Beach knows, that your equally as insane as me” he smirked, God only if he knew.

“Being ‘insane’ isn’t something to be bragged about Niragi, and even if I wanted too, in which I do, I cannot kill you. Are you in your right mind? Of course, you’re not, how foolish of me to ask. Are you even thinking? If I even tried to kill you, what would happen to me? Yeah, I did manage to murder but there are thousands of people inside the Beach. Your death would need to be well-thought of and well planned. You’re Aguni’s little dog and what happens if you go missing? There are more militants than there are of Boshiya’s loyal hoes. If I did kill you, I’d be dead by now. And for the love of God, stop calling me baby.”

Niragi was impressed, he chuckled in reply to your little outburst “Calm down Y/N, I didn’t know you’ve already tried to plan my murder. Must be hard to get me off your mind huh? But I supposed you’re right. Killing me would be challenging. Enough of planning my murder, please sit down” he motioned his hand towards the armchair beside him. As you sat down, he pulled out a glass and a bottle. Your eyes stayed fixed on him pouring you a glass, being extra cautious, that he might try anything. “Please Y/N, I’m not putting anything in your drink, trust me. If I had intentions with you, wouldn’t you think I would’ve done it a long time ago?” he gave you the glass “You’re not that easy trust.” You drank slowly. He was right though, if he did want you, he would’ve done it sooner. Possibly bursting through your door and raping you while you sleep. Still, Niragi isn’t the type to give up just like that, especially when he’s desperate, whatever it is.

He sets his glass down. “As I’ve mentioned earlier, there’s a side of you that’s a lot like me. And I love that about you. How about a challenge?” Oh, how you love challenges. The thrill whether you’ll lose or win. And the pleasure when the opponent is so confident that they’ll win, only to be faced with defeat and failure. “This may sound childish, but it’ll be fun.” He paused “How about we give each other tasks? Not the easy ones like ‘get me that, give me that do this and that for me’ type of shit, no baby no. Difficult tasks, tasks that’ll make you wish you never accepted my offer. And whoever gives up first, well you decide.”

“If I win, I want you out. I want you out of the Beach. And once you’re out of your militant position, once you no longer have use or mean to Aguni or Boshiya, you’ll give yourself to me, for me to kill you.” You set down the empty glass, he chuckled “You really must hate me huh? Well then, if I win, you get to ne my slave. Not only in bed, but any where else. You get to be my pet, my servant, my sex toy, my property. If you still don’t get what I mean, if I win, you will give and offer your life to me. If I win, I owe you now, and if you don’t follow my orders…” he laughed. God, you hated that laugh, you hated how confident he was, you hated that if you lose, you’ll never have freedom again. You hated everything about him. “And what if no one forfeits? No one gives up on the task no matter how challenging it is?”

 “You’re right about that, haven’t thought about it yet. Oh well, good luck to you Y/N” he pulled out a penny. “You’re heads, I’m tails. Whichever lands, they’ll be the one to order around first.” He tossed the coin in the air; your eyes never left the coin. Never blinking, never looking away.

Tails

‘Shit. Fuck fuck fuck, there it is again, that fucking smirk, that stupid grin, God I fucking hate it. Just wait until I wipe that fucking grin off your fucking face. Just wait till your begging for mercy, begging for your life.’ Your thoughts were disturbed to him laughing maniacally “Oh? My my Y/N. Don’t worry, since it’s the first round, I’ll make it easy for you” he paused for a moment “How about steal Chishiya’s jacket?”

“You want me to steal who’s jacket?”

“You heard me, Chishiya.”

“And how do you expect me to do that? He never takes it off!”

“Baby, now that isn’t my problem now, is it? But since I love you so dearly, I’ll help you out a bit. He has presumably 5 jackets inside his closet. Steal all of them, he can survive with one piece of clothing.”

“Alright. But where do I hide it?”

“You can hide it in… Boshiya’s room! And you have one day to accomplish your mission. Do well, baby”

Is he being serious? Stealing Chishiya’s jackets then hiding it inside Hatter’s room? And you have under one day to finish it? Is this a task or a suicide mission? You left his room. You calmed yourself down and thought of a plan. Slowly creeping to Chishiya’s room and walking across his closet, you prayed to every God the wardrobe wouldn’t make a noise and he wouldn’t wake up. You took everything inside and ran as quietly as you could. After getting out of there alive, you ran to Boshiya’s room. Checking if the cost was clear, you thanked God they were all at the Bar. Checking for cameras, there were none, you walked towards the wardrobe and placed everything inside. Once more, running, running towards your room, begging no one saw you come out of his room.

You laid down on your bed, out of breath from all the running. Niragi opened your door and stood at the doorway “And you did that under 1 hour, congrats Y/N”

“My turn fuck face, fuck off and get a dick piercing, would ya?” kicking the door shut as you groaned in annoyance.

A week passed by, yet no one came to bother you. Alas, victory, Niragi finally left you alone. But you came to wonder, where was he? Why did he suddenly stop pestering you? Did he finally surrender? Was he too scared to die and ran away? You smile to the possibilities of Niragi being a pussy and ran away. But as usual, to your ‘victory’, it was nothing. It only lasted for a quick second. Your bedroom door opened.

“Strip.”

Your jaw dropped; there he was. Niragi fucking Suguru, in the flesh. “W-what? Excuse me?”

“You heard me, strip. Have you forgotten? It’s my turn to order you around, or do you give up? Hm?”

You scoffed “Please Niragi, you haven’t even finished my task for you yet.”

“What makes you so sure”

“I don’t see a dick piercing anywhere-…”

He started unbuckling his belt, pulling it down to reveal it. There it was. That damn dick piercing. Not only that he was hard, rock hard. “Like what you see? Can’t seem to stop drooling for my cock, now, can you?” He pulled his pants back up.

He was right, you did like what you see. You did as he said. You took of your clothes but left your underwear and bra. Niragi walked towards you, you started backing up to the table behind you. His slender hands traced your back, then slowly went to down to the lining of your underwear, tugging it down. He ran his middle finger up and down, lining up his finger with your slit.

He continuously played with you, feeling how soaked you were under his touch “H-hey you only told me to s-strip. You didn’t say there was t-touching” you struggled to speak. “Do you really want me to stop now?” he moved the panty out of the way and slid one finger inside of you “Look how easy my finger slid inside. Come on y/n, look at how wet you are.” Pushing one more. He moved them gently, then slowly picked up the pace. Shaking, with one hand on the edge of your table, the other to cover your mouth. “Don’t be shy Y/N, take that hand of your mouth, moan for me” you shook your head.

Niragi stood up, throwing everything on the table down to the floor. He held your waist and lifted you to sit down on your desk, spread your legs and knelt. As he continuously worked on your orgasm, his other hand traveled to the clip of your bra, gently taking them off. He wasted no time and gobbled on your titties, looking up to you with such lewd eyes. You could no longer hold back.

“Fuck keep doing that” you moaned so freely, he loved the sounds of your moans, how you moaned so good for him and only him. You could feel him grinning whilst sucking your boobs. He felt you tighten around his fingers, you were close. He pulled them out, making you whine as he wrapped his hands on your waist, pulling you closer to him. He eagerly took off his pants. “W-wait hey I’m n-not read- Fuck!” He moved in such a fast pace, you felt like you were already close, and you were. “Cumming already? I don’t think so” He pulled out a gun and pointed right at your forehead. Your breath hitched “I tell you when to cum, you fucking whore.” You nodded, trembling in fear, but getting closer to your climax.

“God your so fucking tight, Y/N. Are you that much of a slut for me, baby?” harshly grabbing your face, slapping you hard when you didn’t respond “Answer me whore” now moving the gun and placing it inside of your mouth, cocking the pistol, nodding in response to him. “Good girl” he took the gun off your mouth, a hand placed around your neck, choking you as he pounded the living hell out of you. You could feel him twitching inside “Cum for me”

Lust-filled moans roamed around the room, the sun was already rising, legs sore from being wide open, ass sore from all the spanking. Your faced down on the bed as Niragi came for 4th time. God does he ever feel tired? “I’m not done with you yet, princess” he flipped you around, lifting your legs to rest on his shoulder. Lining up his cock at your entrance, pushing it carefully. Tears spilled as he moved so carelessly. “Slow down, I-it hurts” you whimpered both in pain and pleasure, moaning quietly. “Shh, one more princess, just one more.” He says as he places a few more hickeys on your neck. “P-please it hurts”

 This made Niragi feel bad. Seeing you beg for him to slow down, he pities you, but couldn’t help but to get harder at the thought of you begging. He lifted you gently and hugged you while fucking you slowly. Wrapping your arms around his neck, he took this moment to look at you. God you were so beautiful, your eyes teary, your neck filled with hickeys, your makeup ruined, hair quite messy. He kissed you so gently, slipped his tongue inside of your mouth. He came as soon as you did, cum over-flowing your pussy. You cupped his face and kissed him back, his back falling to the bed, with you on top. It was a long kiss before you broke off to get some air. He held your face “I love you Y/N, more than anything.”

[ivesambrose]

Took me watching black widow for a boost to channel messages besties, apologies for the delay but y'all know I like to provide content!

Pick an image you can vividly picture walking into right now

The reading is timeless xo

To book a personal reading with me please DM or email me at jovescorpioreadings@gmail.com

1. Trials & ordeals bring clarity.

Cut them out

"Gossip doesn't mean useful information."

The offer is there, grab it.

"We won!"

The savings did pay off didn't they?

Works a little overwhelming sometimes but you know you earned all of this and you earned your time off too.

New love, stronger than any other.

It's time to drop the baggage, you know it. Its dead weight isn't it? You want to explore more specifically when it comes to your emotions, your gifts and what's out there for you to see till you can. But look at you, glancing back every now and then purposely conflicting your heart and mind. You think you know but you don't, not right now certainly. Now the thing is, 6 months from now this dead weight is not gonna matter. See that's why I called it a dead weight. You're gonna drop the baggage somewhere along the way.

Change is not always easy for you, isn't it? This one won't be either. But do you know what's it gonna be though? Exciting.

You've been lacking so much excitement cuz you've made peace with where you're at. Bad news and great news, this peace won't last either.

2. So much to learn, so much to see.

"aight, imma head out."

"I pretend I do not see it." 🤡 "it's RIGHT THERE my dude."

Hope & abundance

something brings you the kind of wealth you were looking to build. Slow progress but a sure one. It may have taken time to come likely because it had a timing to it.

Well, you did your running. You did your little, "just gonna dupe myself a little more." yeah... No.

Then what? Life got fed up of you not truly living it and decided to spiral out of control a bit. Hey look, I know it was sudden but look at you unrealizing then realizing. And here you are 6 months from now fixated on something that brings you joy, learning and improving along the way. Look how far you've gotten. Look how much happier this makes you. Look how your inner child smiles back at you. And you thought worry and regret is what you were gonna settle for lol.

3. Conflict & resolution.

Gained confidence

Ending (finally) of a never ending task or something you had been putting efforts towards only to gain something far better.

Stronger immunity

Expensive perfume (something specfic but came through nonetheless)

You took all the memories happy, nostalgic, bitter, sour, sweet, salty... Took them all and gathered power.

Now you're gonna go and build yourself a fortress.

Nothing much to tell you besides, you deserve to celebrate this. It was a whole task, wasn't it? Anyway, come on hurry up or you'll miss your flight.

4. Journey

Isolation

Determination

Travel

"life took 'you wanna see some real speed?' A little too literally."

Your words are really powerful, declare with caution.

The world is in your hands. How does it feel like? Looking back at the ones that caused you so much sorrow? They were your friends, yes? Oh a lover perhaps? And you thought the world of them and they left you so cold at heart and you vowed you'd never, ever, open that heart again. Then the ones with brighter smiles and tender hands came and filled you with so much warmth. Now you're celebrating with them. It feels right, doesn't it?

Walking away from fears and attachments that you worried you couldn't really stay without, suddenly your hearts at ease. Been 6 months and you realize why life is about the journey not really the destination. Oh and congrats on the glow up, peak performance right there 😉

5. You can rest now

Just breathe

This isn't your fight

Once you detach, you'll get to see the bigger picture.

A change or an ending of what felt like control or dominance over you. Could also be change in plans or something you were used to.

Time to feel an emotion that flows gently in you and doesn't drag you down and drown you.

Was it sad? Yes.

Did you fake it till you make it? Also yes.

Did things do a 180? Yes, right? It had to. What else? you were not gonna just sit there and cry for long. You're too strong for this.

Life has been spinning out of control but what we're not gonna do is Kubrick stare at yourself in the mirror. You're beautiful, now go water your garden and invest in your own thing. Everything else is covered.

6. Beauty & power.

You're a prize than cannot be possessed.

"So much to do, but I can't stop these new ideas from coming!"

"Okay I need a break. "

Connection

Romance? This is poetic cinema.

You're a fire sign, you're definitely a fire sign or you've unlocked this spark in you finally.

You definitely went through transition and it wasn't pretty at first. It wasn't pretty at all but you are not someone who gives up when you know deep down your hunches are right.

And you're on a mission that seems impossible. Maybe to others but not to you even if you think like that right now.

This will be the smallest one yet,

Damn... You did that huh.

You really did that. You know how you did that?

Come what may and whatever it takes,

You knew you could.

[will-on-the-internet]

Grow Old With Me | Spencer Reid

Summary: Spencer Reid never imagined growing old with someone, but then suddenly it happens within a blink of an eye, and it's perfect. Inspired heavily by the song Grow Old With Me by Tom Odell, and featuring Dad! Spencer.

Warnings: mentions of children, allusions to sex.

Genre: Fluff

Word Count: 1.5 k

A/N: I honestly meant to write something in my request list next, but then I listened to this song for the first time in over a year, and my brain was just like...Will you've gotta write something now. So, it's now 2.30 am, and I haven't properly edited it, but I hope you enjoy a little look into the life I think Spencer deserves. Also helps to listen to the song while you're reading.

PLEASE REBLOG FOR MORE SPENCER REID FICS!

I can feel you breathing With your hair on my skin As we lie here within The night

I'll pull the sheets When it's cold on your feet Cuz you'll fall back to sleep Every time

It all started after one night together. One night of blissful love, of heated lust and a desire to have each other so close that nothing could distract you from the moment at hand. It was in Spencer’s bed where he first said, ‘I love you', where he first took you in his arms under the covers and made it clear he had no plans to let go, and it was in his bed where the both of you slept together for the first time, a mixture of tangled limbs, strewn around blankets and the light from the moon shining against your bodies. On that night, Spencer knew, as he watched you sleep, a soft smile curling his lips, that he wanted to spend the rest of his life with you. And as the night turned into morning, as the cool spring breeze drifted through the window and you stretched in his arms, Spencer could only chuckle quietly as he tucked you back under the covers, pulling the sheets over your feet and humming as you laid against his chest. This was the perfect picture of all his dreams coming true, and he knew he wouldn’t ever trade it for the world.

Grow old with me Let us share what we see And oh the best it could be Just you and I

It didn’t take you long to realise that Spencer was in this relationship for the long haul, that he was going to fight to have every moment with you, to hold you as long as he could and to give you all the love in the world until your time on earth was up. You realised when he asked you to move in with him, and for a man who didn’t like changes, or going out of his way to make his life different, you knew as he held out the small silver key, that this meant something to Spencer.

“You…you want me to move in with you? Spencer, are you sure?” He nods furiously, knowing there’s no way he’s going to regret his decision any time soon. Standing up, he walks around the couch that the two of you are sitting on, and he gestures to the empty to one of the bookshelves that are now empty, previously jam-packed with his books.

“I’m sure, Y/N. Look! I made space in the bookshelves for all your books, and I emptied out half of my wardrobe for your clothes, and…and I just thought that this could be where you call home, from now on. And I know it’s sudden and we’ve only been dating for what…two months? But I know that I don’t want to share a place with anyone else, let alone wake up to an empty bed ever again.” You were kissing him then, taking the key happily while he could only smile against your mouth.

“Of course, I’ll move in with you, Spencer Reid. There’s no one I’d rather live with. Especially if it means I get to share a bed.” He laughs openly at your words and pulls you into a hug that you swear makes your stomach flutter and heart pound even harder, especially when he kisses you right underneath your ear and keeps whispering that he loves you as if you’re going to forget any time soon.

And our hands they might age And our bodies will change But we'll still be the same As we are

We'll still sing our song When our hair ain't so blonde And our children have sung We were right

Spencer’s greatest honour in life was having the privilege to see you grow, body ever-changing as the both of you got older, his chestnut-coloured hair being flecked with streaks of grey, and your face slowly taking on lines of age that he found so very beautiful. He loved everything about you, loved how even as the two of you aged, you still loved to lay yourself over his lap while he read, or how you danced around the kitchen while you cooked. And you loved every single thing about your doctor, from the way he smiled that little smile that made his eyes squint and cheeks blush, to how he never seemed to be warm enough, wanting an endless number of blankets, sweaters or even your body to swallow him up, to keep him warm and in turn, keep him safe from all the horrors of the world.

He loved thinking back to all those years ago when he married you, when he took you as his partner for the rest of his life, and how the both of you danced until the sun came up, surrounded by those that loved you and you loved just as much. He thought you could never look more beautiful than you did on your wedding day, dressed simply for the little ceremony in Rossi’s backyard, but every morning when he sees you for the first time, in the sun that shines through the window and under fresh bed covers, he’s constantly waking up in awe, wondering how on earth he was so lucky.

But then the two of you became four, a set of twins making the little family that Spencer had always dreamed of, and suddenly Spencer thought that everything was perfect, that nothing could beat the feeling he went to bed with every night; happiness, love and perfection all around him after he puts his son and daughter to bed, pulls you into his arms and listens to your heartbeat against his chest, and he knows that he’s a lot luckier than most people, and he’s eternally grateful for that.

And the hairs they stand up And my feet start to thump Yer the feeling is dreaming Around

You'll be the one Make me hurt, make me come Make me feel like I'm real And alive

In the early stages of your relationship, every moment with you was filled with his racing heart, the fierce fear that he would embarrass himself in front of you and a love that burned so bright both of you were scared you were going to be burned. But then, as the dust settled and a familiar rhythm formed, Spencer quickly calmed down. Sure, his heart still thumped loudly in his chest, and he still wanted to make you smile and laugh with him and not at him, but he knew that everything was going to be okay.

He knew without a doubt that you made him feel alive, that he existed for more than just his brain and that you loved him endlessly when you kissed him and held him. He knew you were undoubtedly his, that you would never want anyone else, and he held tight to that truth every time the two of you fought.

You both knew the fights meant nothing, both knew that you only fought when work was becoming too much and the both of you were tired, at the ends of your tethers and feeling overwhelmed by raising a family and being there for each other. But once the pain had passed, apologies accepted and loving regret-filled kisses exchanged, and the two of you always ended up in bed together, wrapped around each other until the sun rose or your children woke, whatever came first as you grew older.

Grow old with me Let us share what we see And oh the best it could be Just you and I

Spencer Reid thought he’d never end up with someone, never had someone to grow old with him, to share a life and a house and an endless amount of mornings, evenings and time in between. He’d never believed that someone would ever love him enough to spend their life with him, to kiss him when he woke, to make him dinner after a long night, to fall asleep in his lap on the couch or even promise themselves to him. Hell, he didn’t even think he’d ever have children, or a little slice of happiness that everyone else seemed to think he deserved after all the horrors he’d experienced. But suddenly he had it, and he was never going to let go, especially right now, as you wrapped yourself around him as you watched your twins do homework at the dinner table.

“You know, I never thought this would be my life.” It was a whisper against the material of his sweater, but he heard it all the same as he pressed a kiss to the top of your head.

“Oh yeah, what did you expect, my darling?” You smile at his question and tilt your head up to look at him, brushing some of his curls out of his eyes.

“Something boring, not something as perfect as this.” He hums in response to your statement and swoops you in for a sweet kiss that your twins groan at, complaining about seeing their parents kissing in the kitchen. But the two of you can only laugh, telling them that they’ll be doing the exact same thing when they’re older, and even as they roll their eyes and turn back to their homework, Spencer can’t stop looking down at you, so in love, so happy and so grateful to grow old with you.

PLEASE REBLOG FOR MORE SPENCER REID FICS!

Send an ask, comment or DM to be added to the taglist!

Tagging: @cacoetheswriting @anxiousblanketqueen @madswonders @spookydrreid @altsvu @peachpitfics @spacedikut @reid-to-me @reidsconverse @reidsnose @b-a-utiful @bvttercupbby @averyhotchner @lunalovecroft @mggsprettygirl @makaylajadewrites @tobias-hankel @reidingmelodies @spencersmagic @random-human-person @reidemandweep @rigatonireid @wasteland-bvby @mikewizkalifa @spenxerslut @dralexreid @reidology @reidgifs @lizzarooni @lady-loves-a-lot @lumoshotch @spencersawkward @laurnrnlds @laurakirsten0502

[blacktofade]

pls oh god of fics pls grant thee touch starved Shane and oblivious Ryan in shyan ship *bows down* (i sent one before and donno if u actually got it cuz it showed error so im sending in another try)

I didn’t get your other ask unfortunately, but this is an idea I’ve been wanting to write like 10k for, but I know I’ll never have the energy. So it’s a little ficlet instead.

CW: Includes post-kidnapping, malnutrition, and an embarrassing lack of touching for a touch-starved prompt.

*

Shane disappears on September 17th. Ryan only remembers because they’d been scheduled to shoot an episode of Weird and/or Wonderful World and he’d had to eventually make the uncomfortable call to the Los Angeles County Arboretum and Botanic Garden to cancel their tour and interview.

It had been funny at first with Shane’s habitual lateness. They’d all assumed he’d slept late, forgot what day it was, and completely blanked on the filming schedule.

It’s less funny a week later when a missing person’s report is filed and Shane’s parents fly out to stay with Scott while they wait for any kind of news.

Detective Flores finds him two states over, a month and a half later. There are six hostages in total, as part of some elaborate heist that’s foiled before it comes to fruition. Shane’s kept in hospital for almost a full week, treated for malnutrition and a few general injuries, the news passed to Ryan through Scott via a DM on Instagram.

For the first time since Shane’s disappearance, Ryan sleeps through the whole night.

On the Saturday following Shane’s return, Ryan wakes to a phone call at eight in the morning.

“Hello?” he answers, voice rough from sleep, brain barely online.

“I’m sorry,” Shane apologizes, but his voice alone is enough to wake up Ryan the rest of the way. It’s the first he’s heard from him. He’d been trying to give the family space and knew Shane would find him once he was ready. Apparently, now is that time. “Can you come pick me up?”

“Sure,” Ryan agrees instantly, shoving back the covers and getting out of bed. “Where are you?”

“My apartment,” Shane admits and Ryan pauses from where he’s trying to dig out a pair of clean pants. “I just need a break.”

“Sure,” Ryan repeats. “I’ll be there in twenty.”

It’s quiet on the other end of the line before, quietly, Shane says, “Thanks, Ryan.”

*

Shane’s waiting at the curb when Ryan pulls up.

Ryan unlocks the door and watches Shane fold himself into his seat, waiting a moment for Shane to settle before reaching over to set a hand on his knee, squeezing gently.

“Hey man,” he says gently. “Long time no see.”

Shane startles at the touch, but glances over, offering a small smile in return.

He looks different. His face is thinner, his cheekbones a little more prominent, and there’s a new scar on the right side of his forehead that disappears into his hairline.

“Hey,” Shane replies, buckling his seatbelt and giving Ryan a view of his right hand, which has two fingers splinted together. “Thanks for coming.”

“Everything okay?”

“Yeah, why wouldn’t it be?”

Ryan stares at him incredulously and eventually Shane looks away, out the passenger side window.

“It’s just hard being surrounded by everyone right now,” he says, clearly talking about his family. “I need a break.”

Ryan checks over his shoulder and pulls back onto the road.

“Is my apartment okay? Or did you want to go somewhere else?”

“Your place is fine,” Shane tells him, and from the corner of his eye, Ryan sees him turn his head, staring as though Ryan won’t notice.

At the next red light, Ryan glances over. “How are you doing?”

Shane looks away, clearly caught. “Getting tired of people asking me that. It’s all anyone asks these days.”

“Guess they just want to know you’re okay.”

Shane glances back towards him. “Could be better,” he says bluntly and Ryan can’t help but let out a quiet huff of laughter.

“Yeah, no shit. But the hospital cleared you?”

“Yeah,” Shane sighs. “Apart from a few broken fingers and some weight loss, I’m okay.”

“I missed you,” Ryan admits. “It’s probably the longest I’ve gone without seeing you since we started at BuzzFeed.”

Shane frowns like he’s thinking and then the frown deepens. “Jesus, you might be right.”

Ryan laughs again. “Horrifying thought, huh?”

“Puts things in perspective.”

“Didn’t you miss me?” Ryan asks jokingly, but Shane doesn’t answer, just laughs quietly.

“It’s weird,” Shane says. “I was never alone, but it feels like I have to relearn how to be around people now.”

Ryan had read the news after Shane’s rescue. There had been five others saved alongside Shane, so he suspects they might be the reason Shane wasn’t alone.

Ryan shrugs gently. “Adjusting is hard, and I’m sure it’s even harder with your family refusing to let you out of their sights.”

Shane shakes his head. “You have no idea. I was in the shower for twenty minutes this morning and they started knocking on the door to see if I was still alive.”

“Rough,” Ryan laments. “Well, you’re welcome to chill at my place for as long as you need.”

“Can I move in?” Shane jokes, but Ryan just shrugs.

“If that’s what you want.”

It’s silent for a moment before Shane says, “Thanks, I appreciate it.”

Ryan offers him a smile. “Of course, dude. It’s what I’m here for.”

It’s quiet for the rest of the drive until Ryan pulls into his usual parking spot and glances over. “You good?

Shane nods and carefully unbuckles his seatbelt. “Yeah, I’ve got it.”

Ryan’s chest tightens watching Shane limp his way towards the front door, but he knows the last thing Shane needs is more helicoptering.

“Can I get you anything?” Ryan asks as he shuts the door behind them, watching Shane glance around as though he expects Ryan to have redecorated during his disappearance, but ultimately Shane shakes his head. “Okay, well, make yourself at home. You know the drill. I’m gonna go grab a drink.”

He knows Shane can find his own way to the living room, so he moves around him, heading in the direction of the kitchen instead.

“Ryan?” Shane questions and Ryan pauses, turning back.

“Yeah?”

Shane hesitates like he doesn’t know how to get the words out, but after a moment, he takes two steps closer and draws Ryan into a hug instead.

Ryan isn’t entirely expecting it. Shane’s not a touchy-feely guy, which means Ryan can probably count on one hand the amount of times they’ve hugged. But Shane folds around him so tightly that it startles the breath right out of him.

“I did miss you,” Shane mutters and Ryan lifts his hands to reciprocate, holding Shane as hard as he dares when everything feels so fragile.

“I was really worried,” Ryan admits. “I thought you’d been killed.”

He finds himself rubbing one hand along Shane’s spine, trying to soothe him as Shane tucks his face against his shoulder.

“You were gone for a long time,” Ryan continues.

He can feel the warmth of Shane’s breath through his shirt as he exhales shakily. “They broke my fingers when I tried to escape.”

Ryan holds him tighter, needing them both to understand that Shane’s safe again. Having the weight of Shane leaning against him is grounding in a way he never knew it could be. About a month into Shane’s disappearance, Ryan had gone through a mourning period, assuming he’d never see Shane again. He finds tears prickling his eyes as the relief hits him solidly in the chest.

“God, Shane,” he murmurs and he’s not sure who’s comforting who.

The warmth of Shane spreads through him, all the way down to his toes, like a cup of hot soup on a cold day. Except that Ryan never realized he was too cold until this moment. He feels alive and whole again, and he knows he can’t even begin to understand what Shane experienced. The fact that he can feel every ridge of Shane’s spine as his hand passes along it says enough.

When he finally starts feeling like Shane’s probably ready to let go, he loosens his arms and shifts, one foot lifting to take a step backwards.

“Just a little longer,” Shane requests and Ryan’s more than happy to comply, a noise of agreement escaping as he nods.

“I’ll stay here as long as you need,” Ryan tells him. “It’s just good to have you back.”

“It’s good to be back,” Shane replies and tightens his grip again like he might never let go.

To be honest, Ryan’s okay with that. He holds on just as tightly and settles against Shane, finally feeling happy again for the first time in months.

[that-crazy-five-foot-two-chick]

✨WIP/Prompt List✨

These are all my wips and ideas that I've thought to write. If one of them gets you hyped up, send me an ask, comment, or dm, and it might give me the motivation to get my butt in gear and write them (depending on busyness and current frame of mind)! I also may be up to PG-rated meme requests...is that even a thing? idk

They're all pretty happy/fluffy unless noted otherwise. That's just how I roll. All sfw. I do not take fic requests unless it really really strikes my interest cuz if ADHD brain don't go brrr, it ain't happening. Any wips that have posted content will have a link to the first chapter.

So without further ado:

👊 wip, some posted | 👉 wip, none posted | 💭 idea | italics stand-in title

Fullmetal Alchemist

EdWin

👊 Elric Escorts (EdWin and AlMei)—college/modern AU: the Elric brothers start a service at their college to escort people across campus after dark. On their walks, they meet people with pasts, presents, and futures that intrigue them

👉 Baby—modern AU, songfic, sequel to Hello Stranger: What do you do when you meet a stunning stranger that terrifies you with how much of an effect they have on you? Scrounge up the guts to ask them on a date. (And figure out how to get through the date) A/N: I figured if part one was a Stray Kids songfic, part two should be too ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Anyway, here's Wonderw—I mean Mixtape: Oh

👊 I Cain't Say No (but I wish I could)—modern/high school/theatre AU: Ed thought he could drop out after auditioning for the musical...and then he got cast as the lead. Cue situations that put the drama in drama class, including but not limited to a method acting costar, scruples over stage kisses, and stage makeup applied by a not-crush

👊 And Then It Hit Me—college/modern/enemies to lovers AU: Edward achieved every college student's dream: he got hit by a bus. Or, at least, he would have, if some know-it-all hadn't yanked him out of the way at the last second. There goes free tuition...

Other pairings/gen

💭 Havolina (Havoc/Catalina) Bar AU—Catalina wants to go out to a bar but couldn't possibly go alone because it just isn't safe, and Havoc agrees to be her knight in shining armor. Strictly to keep her safe, of course. Perhaps she can get to know him better this way, since Havoc tends to only make an impressive fool of himself with women he's on dates with. And this isn't a date. Probably.

💭 Royai nonsexual FWB, mutual pining, probably modern AU—one day I thought "you know what would be a great/possibly terrible idea [for actual real life situations]? Non-sexual friends with benefits." Like, you're not in a relationship or have romantic feelings for the other, but want a semblance of that in your life. You need cuddles, a plus one for an event, somebody to do stupid romantic (but not for real) things with, someone to tell you you're pretty, someone to ward off creeps, maybe a kiss? Boom. You got it. So yes then I thought it'd be funny/cute to make that royai with a side of mutual pining.

💭 FMA Vietnam War AU—tbh I'm undecided on which generation I would focus on with this one, but there are so many parallels between the American side of the Vietnam War and the military events and perspectives in FMA. Royai/Team Mustang would be the early recruits that willingly shipped off to war while Ed would be one of the disillusioned latecomers to the war. I'm thinking because of his age and circumstances, he'd be a researcher for the military rather than a soldier. Still doing it for Al. There are a lot of loose ends and no particular plot thought up yet, but the similarity is so striking, I couldn't not write it down as a possibility to write. Obviously, being war-based, it would be a more mature, angstier fic, although it still probably wouldn't break the T rating, knowing me as a writer and since it's more character-based than action-based. And yeah, I'm a history nerd, fight me 👊🏻 although usually not military history nerd

💭 Ed's comic books—What if the comic books Ed had on his research tab were encoded alchemy texts? But of course, telling Mustang would take all the fun out of it.

💭 Mei & Hughes—just a couple of excitable throwing knife wielders that really should have met. I have no plot. I just think the two of them in the same room would be n e a t.

Mystic Messenger

👊 You Infect Me, covid/lockdown fic (Seven/MC)—Saeyoung Choi is bored to tears during quarantine, so he figures why not text one of the most available RFA members? But after a while, he realizes he's gotten in over his head... A/N: I haven't updated this since January, help. It was also the first fic I wrote, so I've definitely become a more comfortable writer since I started this

👉 The Song of Your Soul Is Not What I Expected (But It's Better) (Jumin/MC)—originally intended to be written for Mystic Messenger Reverse Big Bang 2021, but that didn't happen lol. For Jumin's first birthday as a married man, he decides to let his wife choose how they spend the evening. She chooses to go to an open mic night, but he never expected that to be her music taste. ...Blink-182. she sings Blink-182. Jumin may do some "MC research" and might learn a Fall Out Boy song as a comeback.

👉 Vanderwaiter (Vanderwood/MC)— MC is new to the world of being a businesswoman, and tries her best to navigate a dinner with a client. Which would be easier if the waiter weren't distractingly good looking. And if the restaurant didn't explode into chaos because his mission as a secret agent went south. (Definitely going to have an action scene, probably involving guns, but no graphic violence)

RWBY

👉 Insurance Scam (Renora)—Nora bursts into Ren's insurance agency asking for medical malpractice insurance for a pillow factory. Let the circus begin, clowns and all. A/N: this was a crack fic/prompt that my sister and I came up with when she was sick and loopy and I took it as a challenge. This will also be my first contribution to FNDM. Maybe I just haven't checked Ao3 since the last two seasons came out (I haven't caught up, don't give me spoilers 😩), but there is a sad, sad lack of good monogamous renora fics out there, and that really should be remedied.

Fruits Basket

👉/💭 Kyoru Bar AU—Tohru thinks it would be fun to go out to a bar with Kyo for their one-year dating anniversary. Kyo agrees, despite his misgivings. Includes: a heavy dose of Kyoko backstory fluff, a dash of Kyo backstory angst, and mayyybe a dash of jealous Kyo because Tohru collects hearts wherever she goes 👀

Ugh I'm finally done, this took so freaking long to get out 😩

As far as meme requests go if that's even a thing, if I've posted about a fandom, it's fair game. If you're not sure if I'm in a fandom, just shoot me an ask/comment/dm. And while I pretty much don't take fic requests, I'm totally open to getting asks on my thoughts about fandom stuff, because I can nearly guarantee you I have some sort of opinion, and I love the attention.

[corruptedsilence]

Anonymous asked: I honestly get it to an extent. I suffer from depression and anxiety and all that fun stuff. But for mine it comes and hits hard for a week or two and then leaves for months. But when I'm depressed, nothing helps much either. :/ But honestly, it DOES help to know people care about you, for me at least. Just people sending me kind words and stuff. Or people sending in threads and RPs to distract my brain. Just remember it's not weak or anything to rely on a few friends from time to time. (1/?) Anonymous asked: I'll be happy to throw you some anons if I see you down. Whether it's kind anons or anons asking questions for Missi to help distract the brain. I know we've never talked, but I really enjoy you on my dash. And let me tell ya, I normally unfollow non mutuals after a week. But there's some people who just seem like someone I wanna hang with, even if it's on anon. I'm not always on, but if you need someone to vent to, you can vent to me if you'd like. I know how it is to bottle it all up.

Sorry I was eating my borger and fries fhewjk

But yeah I totally get that. If people have been around me long enough they know I tend to get like that too. My depression is (at least in my opinion) always worst in Spring and Summer just because the heat absolutely murders me and I find it so difficult to get motivation to do anything. IDK what’s with those seasons it just makes everything worse. Since summer is finally ending and Autumn (like my favorite season) is coming I feel already a lot more relaxed. The cooler temperatures and the rainy days are just helping me relax so much more. Winter too is also so much nicer because while I hate the silence there’s something about Winter that just, it’s a calm quiet instead of silence. Like the entire world for once, can curl under a blanket and restf and that it’s a rest we’ve waited all year to take.

My depression (minus last saturday) hasn’t been too bad. I haven’t intentionally self harmed in so long and my depression has felt more intrusive than active? What I’ve felt this past week or two hasn’t felt like my depression, like it’s someone else’s.

I agree kind words do help a lot, TBH I’ve kept a lot of asks in my inbox just to remind me of the nice words people say and something I can always go back to, to help remind me that I am worth it, that I am good. I’ve finally broken out of the “im not worth it” but more worried I’ve become the “im not good enough. I’m worthy to be here and have friends, but I don’t give anything in return for everything they give me” kinda thing.

If you ever want to my DMs are open? Or they should be at least. You can always send me an ask about who you are cuz yo udo seem like a really cool person! I don’t follow everyone who follows me back because I do have a lot of personal blogs following me (not that i mind since no one has been rude in spamming me or w/e) and Tumblr has a really annoying habbit of not telling me when people follow me??? I’ll look at my followers list from time to time and be like “wait, when did this person follow me?? Hello???” And this happens way too often.

Honestly? At this point I’d feel like we could be mutuals, even if we wouldn’t RP you seem like a really nice and chill person I’d want to support even if we don’t RP or we just slap each other anons lol. I appreciate everything you’ve been writing to me tonight and it honestly feels amazing. Wait it’s not night, it’s afternoon. RIP that’s what I get for sleeping 19 hours and living in a windowless room lol. Always feel free to hit me up, you’re more than shown to be a really cool dude (or dudette) I’d like to chill with too, or just support. Anyone who’s willing to go to this extent to help someone feel better I feel like should be given the respect they deserve because I’ll always respect people who do things like this.

Time is something that is valuable however cheesy it is, but it’s true. And the fact you’re willing to spend time to send me these messages shows to me how much you do genuinely care and how kind you are. So thank you, so much for these and I do hope to see you again whether anon or not I’ll treasure these messages and hope you don’t mind me filing these away with my other kind asks

[trekkiehood]

How Long? - SPN Fic

Title: How Long?

Fandom: Supernatiral

Author: @pricelesstrashpanda and @trekkiehood

Part: 1/10

Words: 2k

Setting: Preseries - Standford Era

Characters: Dean, Bobby, Sam, John

Ship: None

Ao3 Link

Summary: Dean hasn't seen or heard from his family in over a year. After one too many ignored phone calls, Dean decides he's better off dead than alone. Bobby disagrees.

Trigger Warnings: Depression, Loneliness, Self-harm, Suicide

Authors Note:

Hey guys!

We started working on this fic 5 months ago and finally finished the whole thing! We will be uploading the chapters one by one until the story is completed.

This story started in our DMs and somehow became this monster of a fic.

Full warning, this story is dark, read the tags and be warned.

Title from Hadestown song "How Long?"

I hope you enjoy it! Please let us know what you think!

-Jamie

~~~~~

“This is John Winchester. If this is an emergency, leave a message. If not, call my son, Dean, 866-970-3235. He can help.”

Dean’s hand tightened around the whiskey bottle he was holding as he squeezed his eyes shut and silently cursed the way tears welled behind them.

He didn’t like to think about how many times he’d heard that message over the past months. He should be used to it, but it still taunted him.

Dean can help.

Dean needed help. Who was there to call when Dean needed help?

The robotic voice on the other end finished the recording instructions, and the agonizingly familiar tone sounded in his ear. He cleared his throat.

“Hey, Dad. I… uh… I know you’re busy. I just wanted to let you know that… uh… I… I’m gonna go ahead and check out. That is…”

He cleared his throat again.

“I can’t do it anymore. I just… I can’t. I’m done. So I… I guess this is goodbye. Lucky for me, cuz you’re gonna be ticked.”

He managed to laugh, but even to him, it sounded utterly joyless.

“I’m sorry.”

He hung up.

A thumb and forefinger run along the bridge of his nose made sure the tears he could still feel trying to rise stayed well behind his eyes.

That was one strike.

He flicked his phone back open and found Sam’s name. Here went nothing.

He pressed call, raising the phone to his ear with one hand and the whiskey to his lips with the other.

It rang once, then again.

Dean’s throat tightened, something in his chest throbbing a little.

More ringing.

He set down the whiskey, just for a moment, so he had a free hand to once again rub the moisture back from his eyes. He picked it back up and took another swig as the sound of a call unanswered continued to taunt him.

Finally, the ringing stopped.

“Hey, it’s Sam. Sorry I missed you. Leave a message and I’ll get back to you as soon as I can.”

No, you won’t, Dean thought bitterly. Not me. Not the past five hundred times.

More robotic instructions like he hadn’t been through this process a thousand times before. A tone that over the past months, he’d come to hate more than any other sound in the world.

“Hey, Sammy.”

Two words in, and this message was already so much harder than the last one.

“It's been awhile. It's been... What a year? Wow. Uh. I don't know if you even listen to these. I've left enough messages haven't I?"

He forced a weak chuckle.

"Yeah. I just wanted to tell you that… well…. Y'know I won't be offended if you don't listen to this. In fact I kinda hope you don't… I shouldn't even be calling you but I… well you don't have to worry, this is the last time you'll hear from me. I just wanted to tell you goodbye. For good. I know we kinda already said it but that was a 'see ya later'.... Or I thought it was at least. Guess you always knew, huh? You were always the smart one. But this is a real goodbye. I... I think I'm gonna check out… just... I can't anymore and....don't worry about it. I just… I'm... I'm sorry for uh, for bothering you. I know you wanted to get on with your life and I- I just couldn't let go. But it's okay. This is it. This last message and I'll stay away. Permanently. You can be happy. We can both finally be... Well at peace if not happy. I- I love ya Sammy.”

His voice cracked a little in anticipation of the end of the monologue.

“Please be careful."

He snapped the phone closed and dropped it on the counter as the hand with the whiskey in it rose to his lips almost of its own accord. He swallowed a mouthful and then realized no more was coming. He lowered the bottle and stared at it a little dully. He’d only bought it yesterday. Not that it was a record for him or anything, but he hadn’t realized he was drinking so much.

It didn’t matter anyway. He didn’t plan to live long enough to worry about liver failure.

He dropped the bottle into the sink in front of him and picked up the knife he’d left lying on the counter.

His chance for a two-out-of-three was gone. He could just do it now.

But who would tell Bobby, if he didn’t?

Probably his father. Probably not gently or tactfully. And who knew when he’d get around to it.

Bobby didn’t deserve that.

After all, he’d been the only person to stay in any kind of contact with Dean since his family took off. When Dean had screwed up on a hunt and been bleeding out alone, Bobby had been the one to pick up the phone, and Bobby had been the one to call for help.

He’d be dead already if it wasn’t for Bobby.

He deserved to hear it from Dean, and Dean owed him that much at least.

He looked down and saw that he was shaking.

He wouldn’t break down, not yet. Just one more phone call and he’d be done… he could leave. A final “leave a message after the beep.”

The phone rang three times before there was the click of someone picking up the receiver. "Hello?"

Dean was frozen with the phone to his ear. He hadn't actually expected anyone to answer. He should have known better. This was Bobby.

"You gonna answer or just stand there breathin'?"

Dean cleared his throat. "Oh, uh, hey, Bobby. Sorry to bother you."

Dean could hear the smile creeping into Bobby's voice. He cringed inwardly. This call was going to be harder than the others. "You're not bothering me, boy. It's good to hear from ya."

"Oh. Okay. Well, I just... Thought I should tell you that..." He let out a small cough, trying to find the strength to say what he knew he had to. Dean never thought he'd see a day when he actually wished he had gotten the answering machine. "I just thought I should... Should tell you… Uh..."

The smile was gone from the voice and worry was beginning to creep into it. "Tell me what, Dean?"

He took a steadying breath. "That... That I'm done."

"Done with what? A hunt?"

Dean closed his eyes, leaning his head back against the bathroom wall. He couldn't do this. He couldn't explain what he was feeling. Why he was doing what he was doing. He just didn't have the energy.

"Dean, you're scaring me, Boy."

"Bobby..." Dean ran his hand over his face. He was so tired. Couldn't Bobby just leave it alone? Collect context clues and drop it? Dean's eyes flicked to the knife. Bobby would figure it out on his own soon enough.

"Done with what, Dean?" he insisted, a darkening tone spoken with abnormal carefulness and mounting worry.

He wasn't going to cry. Not now. Not yet. He took a shuddering breath. "Ev-everything. All of it. I.... I can't anymore."

"Tell me right now you're not saying what I think you're saying." Dean could hear the note of panic hidden under the growling voice.

"I'm done, Bobby. I tried. But I'm done. I'm checking out."

"No!" he practically barked.

Dean flinched, hand tightening around the phone. There was a brief moment of silence, both of their breathing sounding too loud over the tiny speaker.

"Bobby…" he sighed at last, but he didn’t know what else to say, and the word was left hanging alone.

A calculated deep breath and Bobby returned, sounding softer than Dean had ever heard him. "Hey. Listen to me, Dean. You're not going anywhere."

"I didn't call you so you could play shrink, Bobby. I just…"

Why did he call? He’d made the decision maybe a minute ago, but his mind was foggy and it was all running together. Right. Because Bobby deserved to know. But In the back of his mind, Dean was beginning to wish he hadn't called. Dad and Sam had made it so easy to say goodbye.

"I just thought you deserved to know."

"And I appreciate that. But Dean, I'm not letting you go anywhere."

"No, Bobby. I'm sorry. I am. But you have to let me do this. One out of three is a crap ratio and you know it."

"One out of three what?"

Dean picked up the knife again, running his thumb along the blade. He couldn't hold back the exhausted sigh. "Bobby, I'm tired. Just let me go, okay?"

"Dean. Dean, listen to me right now. Where's your daddy?"

The coarse laugh bubbled up before he even realized what was happening. "Like I know. I told you. One of three."

A beat of silence as the older hunter slipped the pieces into place. "How long have you been on your own, Son?"

"Not sure."

Why keep track of time? What was there to keep track of? Just alone, alone, alone, hunt, alone, alone, hunt.

"Couple months? Year maybe? Not long after.... After Sam."

When had he left again? August? No, before then? He never thought he'd forget that date. Now it was leaving him blank with just the searing memory of loss, loss, alone.

"He's been gone since Sam left?!"

"Like I said, Bobby. I can't do it anymore."

Maybe he was finally starting to understand. Maybe now Bobby would leave him alone and let him get on with it.

"Dean, you should have told me you were alone."

Dean scoffed at that. "Like you care, Bobby. No one cares."

That was the point. What wasn't Bobby understanding?

"You listen here, Boy. You're in a low place right now. I know. But you do not get to tell yourself that I don't care about you."

"Well then it's only you!" And maybe that made it worse. His voice softened, trying to make the older man understand. “And I'm sorry, Bobby, but... I don't know if that's enough"

Bobby didn't answer. Silence settled over them and Dean felt so overwhelmingly exhausted that he feared he may actually fall asleep.

"When did you call them?" Dean was brought back to the present, blinking at the quiet words.

"Uh… right before I called you."

"Maybe they'll call you back."

Another sardonic chuckle. Bobby really didn't know his family as well as he thought.

"Did you tell them? What you plan to do?"

A beat of silence.

"Yeah."

"They'll call back, Dean." And he sounded so sure of it that if Dean hadn't experienced the months of silence first hand he may have believed him.

"They probably won't even listen to the messages."

And even if they did they still wouldn't call. Probably wouldn't even care.

Bobby seemed to read his mind. "No, Dean. You can't think like that. Just wait."

"Wait?!" He was probably beginning to sound manic. "How long? How long do I have to keep waiting for them to even notice me? Sam leaves. So dad leaves. What does that say about me, Bobby? You think this is the first call they haven't answered? I'm done, Bobby. I'm done waiting."

"Dean, you... Just... Twenty four hours. Okay? Just give ‘em a day. See if they call you back. They might surprise you."

"Bobby..." He ran a hand down his face.

They wouldn't. But he could offer him that much. One final gift to the only person who gave a care what happened to him.

"Fine. Twenty-four hours. But they won't call. You're just delaying what should have happened a long time ago."

"Dean..." Bobby sounded like he wanted to continue to lecture but thought better of it. "Alright. Good. One day. Now where are you?"

"No, Bobby. We're not doing this." Dean wasn't an idiot.

"Dean..."

"No."

Bobby sighed, a mix between worry and exasperation. "Dean, please."

"I said no, Bobby. I'll give you twenty-four hours but that's it. You act like this is a spur of the moment decision. It's not."

"Dean…"

"No. I've made my decision. Twenty-four hours. If one of them calls, just one of them, I won't do it. I can deal with two out of three. But they won't call. And you're not stopping me." He bit his lip, stealing his resolve, cementing it in his brain. He set his watch. "Twenty-four hours."

He flipped the phone shut, ignoring any final plea from the man on the other side. Dropping the phone in his pocket he turned his attention back to the knife. He nicked the tip of his thumb, watching the small cut fill with blood.

Dean let the knife fall loudly onto the ceramic sink. Fine. Twenty-four hours

~~~~~

So... yeah. Not exactly a hopeful ending... it gets worse before it gets better... but... new chapter soon!

What do you think will happen? Will anyone call back? Are John and Sam jerks or is there something else at play?

Let us know with any thoughts or comments! (We both live for comments so please)

Come chat on tumblr at @/Trekkiehood and @pricelesstrashpanda

Much love and God bless,

Jamie

[amjustagirl]

Hii nikki jie!!!! Idk if you've had time to read the tags on the reblogs of a sea of flowers in bloom but in case you havent i just wanted to drop in and tell you that i love every single chapter sobsob. Pls i didnt even know there was a tag limit until i reached it when i was rambling after one of the chapters. This fic has officially gotten me through my first 2 weeks of uni and life will not be same without more kita for me to look forward to every tuesday as my sch week starts and every friday as my sch week ends lsjkdfh HAHA

anyways i absolutely loved how you handled kita's insecurities and reader's character growth was absolutely incredible. Her learning how to grab happiness with her own two hands and that leading her to give kita a chance after he apologised was soso beautiful to me 😭 like idk i feel like usually when a character has that kind of growth it ends up with them not having a man which is a great learning lesson on how you dont need other people to be happy BUT this time reader also knows how so very kind kita is and gave him a chance and STILL had her happiness and i think that's why the line "You’d already learnt to grasp happiness for yourself, but with his companionship, his friendship, his love (and gods, his kisses are to die for), the sprout of happiness you’ve cultivated multiplies into a whole sea of flowers in bloom" resonated with me so much i full on sobbed when i read this askjfksd

I loved all the pictures you painted throughout this whole fic; the ocean, drowning, life rafts, jumping off a cliff, all eventually leading back to 'a sea of flowers in bloom' it was absolutely amazing. I loved kaiyo and tsumu's banter and reader's friendship with kaiyo (and reader making friends with the msby boys had me crying too🥺).

As for outtakes, if i may offer asami and shoma? Maybe one of their playdates or even when asami introduced shoma to her parents as her boyfriend HAHA but if youre not comfortable or inspired to write that no worries :> is it too shameless to say i would just take whatever crumbs you give us HAHAH

Help not me spending like 20min to write this out instead of doing my tutorials asdfkjs sorry for the long message i just felt the need to make my love for a sea of flowers in bloom known HAHAHA hope you have a great day and a good weekend :) (Ive only sent you an ask on anon like once without signing off cuz i was too shy but i think ill start signing off cuz i would probably want to drop in more often 😆) ~ann :> (if thats not taken?)

ann <3

dw bb i've been reading and rejoicing over ALL your tags - the number of times ive gotten weird stares cos i giggled on the mrt is....more than my fingers HAHAHA. ahh i'm glad i made such a difference to the start of your uni sem! if you ever wanna rant about uni or life my inbox is always open, yeah!!

and adff,sgjkldfj;dsfdskj maybe it was me wanting to be greedy and give reader-chan the best of both worlds - growing into her strength while leaving space for love. she definitely doesn't need kita to be happy, but i recognised that he has the potential of making her happier - so that's what i was rly going for in this story. and that line you quoted (pls don't sob bb *wipes your tears away gently*) really encapsulates her growth and destination at the end of the fic. and it also signifies both of them coming together by marrying the imageries they're associated with, the sea imagery with the flower imagery and yeah :3

omg ty for appreciating the imagery!!! sometimes i wonder if im going overboard with it, whether im being poetic for the sake of being poetic but like...idk they kinda speak to me and i do try to be intentional with their placement. i'd say (as mentioned above) that there are two main imageries - sea (i.e. lift raft, ocean, drowning), and flowers (the river of flowers, sprout of happiness etc) that each character is associated with, and then married together as their paths converge and perhaps a dash of imagery for fun (and to tie it back into the storm chaser universe where taking a chance was likened to jumping off a cliff ><)

oh i am definitely gonna write the asami / shoma outtake sometime soon HAHA. let's torture kita and make him sweat a bit. and pls don't be shy about sending asks or even slipping into my dms! i love to chat, and i 100% am happy to talk abt anything under the sun HAHAHAHAHAH. i hope you have a lovely weekend, darling <3

[petalsbloomed-a]

( OK OKK OK I JUST SAW IT PLS ALLOW ME TO SCREAM UNDER THE CUT SPOILERS FOR EP12 OBV )

1. it had a completely different vibe from all the other eps?? prolly cuz the course was like this purple ass cave thing??? omg that was intense and frightening to watch kajkdhfkjskhdfks

2. I SHIT YOU NOT WHEN LANGA’S DAD APPEARED I LIKE AAAAACTUALLY BURST INTO TEARS??? UGLY SOBS?????? LIKE I GET IT IT’S KIND OF A COMMON-ISH TROPE BUT I SHIT YOU NOT LIKE THAT SHIT REALLY GOT ME HELLA EMOTIONAL FOR SOME REASON. AND THEM SPEAKING ENGLISH TO EACH OTHER??? DESTROY ME. BURY ME IN THE GROUND TODAY

3. REKI AND LANGA FINISH YOUR DAMN SENTENCES CHALLENGE. “after the final...” WHAT?? AFTER THE FINAL WHAT MOTHERFUCKER???? HONESTLY

4. tbh part of me expected an adam redemption arc but like??? i wasn’t the biggest fan of it tbh. like that motherfucker has been caught on camera literally fucking assaulting minors and people he’s competing against like???? he needs to fucking go to jail. i don’t mean to get political but i don’t like prisons and i’m an atheist but there’s a special place in hell for fuckers like that like jfc

5. SHADOW DESERVES BETTER I FELT SO SORRY FOR HIM LIKE WTF HOW DARE YOU. #JUSTICEFORSHADOW2k21

6. i personally don’t think the ep was SUUUPER baity??? like i understand peeps who say it’s queerbait but honestly there’s waaaaaay too much queercoding into this shit. langa literally said he LIKED reki and at the end of the ep he said langa was his happiness, so i gotta be real the bro and not lover energy was a bit disappointing, but tbh this happens a lot in sports anime i’ve heard.

7. THAT HUG WAS A GODDAMN GAY HUG IF I’VE EVER SEEN ONE HOLY FUCK. LANGA LITERALLY JUMPING INTO REKI’S ARMS AND BOWLING HIM TO THE GROUND WAS E V E R Y T H I N G I’VE EVER WISHED FOR IN MY FUCKING LIFE. THAT SHIT WAS CUTE AND DID THINGS TO MY HEART LIKE MY GOD.

8. last thing: i think the series is good with just one season, i don’t think we really NEED a second, but i’d be totally cool with one or more drama cd’s/extras/etc like they did with free

so yeah. those are basically my thoughts on the ep. i have too many feelings right now. i’m like fulfilled, disappointed, sad, a lot of things all at once. i will CHOOSE not to be productive for the rest of the day and likely all day tomorrow as well bc of this emotional-ass shit man. will my music theory homework get done? NOPE. will i do video observation hours for my 100 hours due at the end of the month even tho i’m only halfway there? NOPE. will i do any practicing? NOPE. will i get through the requests i got on my writing blog? NOPE. head empty but renga and this goddamn series live there rent-free.

also, now that i’ve gotten through that wave of excitement/anxiety/whatever the fuck that pre-episode emotional train was i can finally eat dinner bc my appetite is actually back and she’s here to stay.

so yeah i’m gonna go and listen the pain away with these four songs i found last night. oh and some movie soundtracks as well. also feel free to send me asks/dms/etc to scream with me i’d be more than happy to. uwu