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aladaylessecondblog · 2 years ago

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Faal Hah Wuld, ch. 11

Summary (I suck at these):

Sadrith stops at Heljarchen with Torovan. There is an argument over beds, and a fight with bandits.

"The Right Set Of Ears"

"So," Torovan said, looking at the lit, empty, blue-green crystal display, "This is where you found the Elder Scroll."

"It is, yes," Sadrith replied, "And you know what was strange...how light it was."

"I know. Sigurd tells me you sold it to the librarian at the College, and he keeps it along with the two others."

She looked over quickly. "Two others?"

"There was...an issue with some vampires attempting to make particular nuisances of themselves. Blotting out the sun...what a foolish notion. We found two more in the process of taking care of that issue. Seems we were quite lucky you sold him the Elder Scroll, as it turns out we needed that one too."

"Funny how I heard nothing of that. Certainly I noticed an uptick in vampire attacks, but..."

"It's no longer a problem," Torovan added after a moment's thought. "And the orc has now three Elder Scrolls over which he can exert the authority he seems so eager to throw around."

"SOMEONE has to make sure the books remain intact," she replied. There was the urge to go on about how it was important, entirely necessary for (gods, what was that orc's name?) to make sure that knowledge REMAINED as accessible as it was now. She managed to stop herself, though, and say only, "It's something to brag about, at least. How many places outside the Imperial City have more than one elder scroll just laying around?"

"The Imperial City is in shambles," Torovan said, as they headed for the lift, "And they're lucky to have much of anything still there, let alone the elder scrolls."

"If the Thalmor kept their noses out of everyone's affairs, then things would likely be better off. And not just for the Imperials."

Torovan made no reply.

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Both of them were glad to step out of the lift at the Tower of Mzark, though for different reasons.

Torovan said something about having spent too much time underground already, and pulled his fur cloak more tightly around himself.

"We're not too far from Heljarchen," Sadrith replied, giving a gesture as she started off, "Bit of a walk, but it shouldn't take too terribly long. My steward'll give us a good welcome."

Still grumbling, Torovan followed along.

"I'll be glad to get out of this wretched cold. I'm surprised you aren't feeling it more yourself. Small as you are, you ought to have frozen over by now."

"I'm used to it," she shrugged, "Maybe you need to get out of the College more often...or, and I say this politely, go back to Morrowind."

"I would if I could." Torovan's voice was not angry as she half-expected it to be. "But Sigurd plans to stay here, so here I stay with him."

"How lucky you both are, to have a friend so loyal," she smiled briefly at the thought, an expression which quailed when Lydia came to mind again. "I'm sure he wanted to come on this journey, but they need the presence of an adult at the College to keep the peace."

That made Torovan laugh. "You are no stranger to their antics, then."

"Not at all. Most of them are tolerable, but...the pointless rivalries..." Sadrith shook her head. "And then there are the ones with outlandish research. Arniel Gane..."

"I don't recall that one."

"He was there before you and Sigurd, I believe. The first time I came to the College. I wasn't especially interested in his research but he paid decently, so I went along with it. Man vanished before my very eyes hitting some sort of warped soul gem with Keening."

"Keening, you say."

"He was researching what happened to the Dwemer, and thought he might be able to...simulate it again."

"That was foolish of him."

"I'm not even entirely certain that it didn't work," Sadrith shrugged. "He hit the soul gem twice with Keening, and nothing happened. Then a third time, but angry. Then he was just...poof. Gone. That part would be expected, maybe but..."

She gestured vaguely with both hands.

"The odd part is, I can summon him. He's ghostly and doesn't speak, but he's quite handy if I need someone around to help me clear out a bandit camp."

"Strange that no one has ever mentioned it at the College." Torovan said. "Do you still have Keening?"

"I honestly don't remember."

"How can you NOT remember?" His tone shifted instantly; there was now a definite edge in his voice, "One of the tools of Kagrenac, and you simply don't remember what happened to it?"

"I've--handled a lot of artifacts. I'm sure I've told you that already." Sadrith shrugged. "Nocturnal's Skeleton Key, the Wabbajack, the gray--the point is, it could be anywhere. It's not like it's good for anything now anyway."

Torovan said no more on the subject, and seemed to move faster once they were within sight of Heljarchen.

It had changed quite a bit since she had first had it finished. To one side was a proper stable. To another was a shack for breaking down animals, and a scorched bit of ground littered with unused bones.

"Gregor must've had a hunter over recently," Sadrith said.

"Poachers, you mean."

"Hunters," she corrected, "As long as they hand over a little of their kill I don't care if they hunt on my land. They get to keep doing what they do best, and I end up with a little more to go into my stores...and a few less deer to pick at my wheat."

"You? Farm?" Torovan laughed. "Now I've heard everything."

"Really, is it that hard to believe? It's easy enough to handle...good and..." Sadrith stopped, suddenly unable to find the word she'd meant to say. Easy, that wasn't it, she'd already said it. M...m, something. Mundane? No. No, that wasn't it. "I can't seem to please you at all. Hired sword, not enough. Farming, definitely not enough. Do you expect me to live on dragonslaying all by itself? Do you think hero types just vanish once the hero work is done?"

Again, silence. A long pause.

She was raising her hand to knock at the door when he finally answered again.

"I simply never thought of someone like you farming, is all. Others I know dedicated themselves to a cause rather than settle into such a...lackluster routine."

"I have a cause," Sadrith added, after she knocked.

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Gregor gave a smile and then a bow when he opened the door.

"Thane! A surprise to see you, but a welcome one. Come in, come in, you look as though you've come quite a ways tonight."

"That I have," Sadrith replied, "And I've brought someone with me...we'll only be here for the night. I hope we're not imposing on any plans you might--"

"Bah, what plans do I ever have? Come in, come in."

He gestured and Sadrith walked in; Torovan ducked slightly and shut the door behind him.

"Has--trade with Dawnstar stayed good?"

"Good enough. We're making a small profit from that and from the caravans that stop here now and then on their way there." Gregor gestured vaguely. "One of the hunters dropped by a few days past, so we've got quite a good haunch of venison ready. And a black pudding, too...though I have to confess I've already had more than my share of it."

Sadrith gave a slight laugh. "That's no problem, so long as you've enough to share. Do you have enough blood to make any fresh?"

"Ah, sadly no."

The conversation stayed in a similar friendly vein through dinner, though Torovan (understandably, at least to Sadrith) claimed the lack of an appetite and ate nothing. He did take wine, but stay mostly quiet.

Until it was time to sleep, of course.

Sadrith steered him away from the door off the side of the main room. "Not there, that's Gregor's room. Upstairs."

She lead Torovan up the left stairs, and moved towards the two small beds.

"You've got to be kidding me," he said. "You expect me to sleep in one of these?"

"It's not just the one I expect you to sleep in, I was going to push them together. It's either this or my bed, which isn't--"

"I'd rather take yours, then." Torovan replied. "It's only one night but I do not intend to wrench myself like a contortionist and wake up feeling as though you had kept me in a trunk."

Sadrith huffed. "It's not my fault you're as tall as you are."

It was just easier to let him take her bed, she thought. It wasn't a big deal, he'd only be in it for a night. And she could manage just fine pushing these two beds together.

She lead him around the top floor and into her bedroom.

It looked the same as the last time she'd left it. A single candle and a mug on the bedtable, the wardrobe--slightly out of place, she thought, as she went to adjust it.

"One might almost think you don't want guests here, with the lack of suitable beds," Torovan said as he tucked his bags into the wardrobe. "Did you never expect to have any?"

"What would you say if I answered 'yes'?" she asked. He gave her a strange look as she shrugged and went on, "Most of those who do visit tend to sleep outdoors...the hunters, the khajiit. I suppose I just...never thought of it."

She paused, turning away when he sat down on the edge of the bed, but staying close enough he could hear her as she lowered her voice. "How is your supply looking?"

"Good enough," Torovan replied evenly, "But it would be best to replenish it, if you've a source."

"...if worst comes to worst, you can take mine. But the hunting is decent around here, so it shouldn't be necessary," Sadrith added.

She could almost feel his stare.

"You trust too easily," he added in a low tone soon after. "You would do well to fix that failing. Suppose I were of a mind to harm you?"

"If you were, you would have done it already. I'd have seen a look, or a sneer that wasn't just you being an utter snob." She turned back around to look at him as she headed for the door at the back of the room, gave him a grin, and an exaggerated bow. "I am the dragonborn, the favored fearless hero of Skyrim, and if I am afraid of anything, it is a battle made too easy."

"And you say I am too full of myself."

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Sadrith could not sleep.

Blame it on the shadow man, or sleeping indoors after a long period spent outside, or not sleeping in her own bed--whatever the source of the problem, the end result was the same.

She tried reading, but the fatigue never strayed into her mind, which always presented her with the same strict and definite feeling of you are not going to sleep. After a lengthy period and more intimate book failed to do anything for her, she decided to look about in the basement. Perhaps some mindless arranging of weapons or organization of ingots might help.

She went down the stairs and took the trapdoor into the basement, shivering only slightly in her robe. She formed a ball of light in one hand, and noting the altar to the Nine, walked over towards it.

"I forget if I've prayed to you recently," she said, "I...tend to forget things like that. But I suppose I ought to do it now, while I have the chance."

She took a deep breath.

"Show me what to do. Give me some...some idea, something to go on. The Thalmor will take over, if they aren't stopped, and...well, there are others who would resist. But I have the strange feeling that if I don't, no one else will. Nonsense, I know. Arrogance. What right do I have to think such a thing, with my...with my failings? My unsteady mind?"

Perhaps it was hopeless, came the thought, to think that there might be an answer. To think that she should hear from Akatosh himself, despite the gift of the dragon soul she'd already received. Maybe he would think that that was enough.

"I just want to stop the high elves from obliterating us all," she said, "Will you not help me?"

There was no answer. No feeling of being watched. The shrine did not feel entirely empty, but it was still cold.

A similar prayer was offered to each of the other eight shrines, but there was no answer from any of them, either. Though from Talos's shrine she did feel something...some small inkling of pride.

He saw what I did to the Thalmor, with the Nord prisoner...of course he would look kindly on me after that.

She walked past the training dummy to get some mead, and then looked back at it once she'd finished her drink. Gregor had dressed it for some training apparently--she noticed some marks at its neck--in that strange Crusader armor she had found at Four Skull Lookout.

She remembered trying to wear them the first time she laid hands on them, and having a feeling of discomfort, of wrongness. That she was unfit to wear them, and had then taken them off. She had made the pilgrimage to the nine shrines, but then--had forgotten to come back to get the armor again. There were other things to wear, after all, and other things to do.

"What about you?" she said, "I've read in books you don't like to be prayed to, but that doesn't mean I can't speak to you. If you're there to listen. Would YOU like it if I strayed out, wearing your armor, slaying the Thalmor in defense of Skyrim?"

It was faint...very faint, but Sadrith felt something then.

(Maybe, she told herself, it was her own mind. Was it possible, certainly. But she wouldn't dismiss the idea of other things)

Eagerness.

"So you are...well--"

The trapdoor above opened suddenly, and Gregor's voice shouted down from it.

"Thane! Bandits are approaching, four of 'em!"

"It's fine, I'm coming!"

She cursed under her breath that she'd left Chillrend up in the bedroom. She knocked over the fighting dummy and dressed hastily in the armor, and not seeing its sword--grabbed for one that sat in the weapon rack. A two hander, a little much, but--

Her mind stilled, instantly.

The sword from the Solitude sewers, she realized halfway up the ladder.

That sword, she'd forgotten what it was, only where she'd found it. It was plain metal, unadorned, nothing to really crow about. Except for one thing that she found most valuable--that when her hand closed around its hilt, the chaos in her mind ceased entirely. It was a cold silence, almost frightening in its way.

She rushed out the front door, sword in hand.

Four bandits stood before her and Gregor. Four nords, one of which was wearing the expensive Nordic armor she'd come to expect from the bandit leaders.

I wonder if it's a set I've sold to Tonilia before...

Sadrith charged at the nearest bandit, which wasn't the leader. She saw him raising his own sword and swung her own low--it bit into his side, cutting cleanly through the leather armor he was wearing. He cried out in pain and she pulled it back, aiming a kick directly at his groin. He fell, and she turned to see Gregor taking on the leader. The two others approached her and she sidestepped, letting the sword drag along the ground for a moment.

She Shouted--"FUS!"

They didn't go flying, but they DID stumble, and that gave her the opportunity to raise the sword and bring it straight down on the head of one of them, splitting it halfway and staining the sword and his armor alike. Then the ground, when she pulled it back.

"Run," she growled at the other, "Run, and I'll let you live."

When he ran forward, mace raised in what would clearly be a wild swing, she smirked.

It seemed that she blinked and dodged his blow in that missing moment. Her sword was raised, and she brought it down, cleaving off his arm--

There was a sudden elation, a glory in defeating these miserable bandits. When she turned and saw Gregor falling back, though--the sensation died almost instantly, and turned to fury.

Again, she Shouted.

"IIZ SLEN NUS!"

Her breath crystallized to ice in the air as the Shout moved forward, striking the bandit chief--and turned him from a man of flesh and blood to solid ice. With an enraged growl, she strode forward, swung the sword--and shattered what had once been a man.

For a few moments she stood like that--arms sore, muscles complaining, breathing coming hard. Then she turned to Gregor.

"Are--are you alright?"

"I'm--" Gregor stumbled over his words and stood, clenching at the (ebony axe, she remembered giving him that some time ago) as he stood. "I'm fine. He moved quickly for one so heavily armored."

She felt the anger leaking away as she watched him dust himself off. There was a wound on his arm, which she came forward to heal.

"A pity I didn't think to leave the armor for you. You probably could have used it," she said, "It looked...very nice."

"I'm happy with what I have," he replied, waving dismissively with his free hand once its arm's wound was closed, "Truly, Thane. The fur in this armor is better against the cold, at any rate, and lets me stay mobile."

That made sense, she supposed. She thought for a moment, and then looking down at the bodies, something else came to mind.

"Let us burn the bodies," she replied, "Not knowing them, we don't know if they have...a family tomb, or anything of that sort. We can bury the bones tomorrow."

Gregor silently agreed, and helped her carry the bodies of the three remaining bandits to the blackened ground where he said the hunters had burned the remains of their kills. After stripping them of their weapons and gold their bodies were arranged on a small pyre.

It did not take long to finish the job, and perhaps half an hour later it was done. She headed back to the house, followed closely by Gregor.

The door opened just as she was about to open it; Torovan stood there, his fur robe loosely pulled on. She saw him look at her; a second later he drew back. Not afraid, surely, but definitely shocked or surprised.

"What's going on out there?" he asked, "I thought I heard weapons at first, but then there was the sound of a fire..."

"Bandits," Sadrith replied quickly, "We've taken care of them. You can go back to bed."

"You're sure there aren't more lurking to avenge their--"

She removed the helmet, and looked up at him. Gregor, muttering something about all the excitement, headed right for the kitchens.

"I'm sure. The leader is a pile of ice on the ground. Any bandit watching would have fled for the hills if he has any sense in his brain. There is NOTHING to worry about."

Torovan huffed, but not in an angry way--at least, not that she could tell.

"You're a cocky little bastard, aren't you?"

"And don't you forget it," she said.

Sadrith went to the basement, cleaned the armor, and returned it to the training dummy, now upright. The sword she kept when she went back upstairs, and then propped against the wall beside the bed.

Finally, finally, she slept.

#fanfiction #pelinal hearing dragonborn talk about killing thalmor like 👀#voryn is a grumpy old man #and very loyal to his buddy the archmage #the dragonborn doesnt know whats going on yet #dagoth ur #dragonborn #tes #tesblr #elder scrolls #nerevarine #skyrim

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yanderelovlies · 2 years ago

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The two of your twirled around the large room as you let out a giggle. Jack smiled lovingly down at you, almost completely forgetting where the two of you were.

"Don't keep the dragonborne to yourself!" Before Jack could react, a nord came behind him, taking you away from him. Immediately, Jack's smile fell as you and the nord danced further from him.

Your smile didn't seem bright. In fact, it seemed forced. He began to make his way to you, wanting to save you from whatever this guy was doing. However, once again before he could reach you, you were twirled into the arms of a wood elf. This happened a couple more times before you pulled away from whatever partner you were with.

You didn't hesitate to find your way to Jack with a nervous laugh. "I forgot how joyful the people of Skyrim can be when celebrating."

Jack hummed with a nod before he gently grabbed your hand. "How about we step outside for a bit sunshine." You nodded, following the bigger nord outside the dining hall.

Even as the big doors shut behind you two, you can hear the party still raging inside. Jack let go of your hand, his gaze going up to the sky. Besides the muffled music and laughter, it was quiet before Jack finally spoke, his eyes never leaving the night sky. "It's over, huh?" You looked up at him questioningly."I mean. Alduin is gone, and the world is safe again... I guess it time to start looking for new work."

Though he wasn't looking at you, he could see the shocked expression from the corner of his eye. "Are you leaving? why?"

It was Jack's turn to look at you with a raised eyebrow. "I thought you were gonna focus on the companions now?"

"Yes, as Harbinger, I think it's best to do so, but I'm not sure why that means you have to leave. Was it Vilkas? If so, he doesnt-"

Jack shook his head, his eyes finally meeting yours. "No. I know how Vilkas is. I'm not a companion, Sunshine. I'm not sure they will take too kindly to me hanging around."

You took a hold of his hand, making him visibly perk up "Jack I WANT you by my side. If the others have a problem with it, then they can take up with me."

Jack could feel his face go hot. This felt like a confession, and he would be lying if he said he didn't want that. "Do you mean-"

You look up at him, love and determination shining bright in your eyes. "I love you Jack...I wanted to tell you after the celebrations away from everyone, but too late, I suppose."

Jack could feel his whole body light up. You loved him possibly as much as he loved you! "d...do you mean it?"

Now you were fully facing hold both of his large calloused hands in your own. "More then you could ever know."

That was all Jack needed to hear as he pulled you into deep yet passionate kiss. He wasn't exactly sure what the future holds for the two of you, but God's above is he glad he is by your side.

#sunny day jack #swwsdj #something's wrong with sunny day jack #x reader #yandere x reader #something's wrong with sunny day jack x reader #swwsdj x reader #skyrim au

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patchdotexe · 4 years ago

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doip.: session 1 / 7.11.21

LAST TIME ON DOIP we got our asses solidly handed to us by a manticore and alidaar wasn't actually set up to use his class specialization because i've never played a fighter before. also i wasn't paying attention to half the session bc i was probably dissociating so my notes are incredibly useless.

jorb: nameless still doesnt have any personality traits on their sheet but that's okay nyx: don't worry about it.

jorb: do you want a recap? leo: yeah, my notes are garbage jorb: okay! PREVIOUSLY, ON DRAGON BALL Z.... [starts ACTUALLY PLAYING THE "PREVIOUSLY ON DBZ" MUSIC] leo: I AM GOING TO KILL YOU

oh god i have to do math oh my mic cut out during the dbz bit so the last thing anyone heard was me Yelling. and it also means jorb missed out on my applause. f. anyway nothing of importance was lost bc i was mostly whining about math

tobias is casting Speak With Animals! ...on a druid! who he doesn't know is a druid! tobias: don't worry little buddy, we'll get this curse off of you some day. nameless: uhhhhhhhhhhhhh alidaar can't understand nameless in wildshape yet so he's just overhearing tobias talking to him and nameless going [binturong noises]

tobias: [thinking] should i ask him if he knows.. math? how intelligent is this raccoon???

michael: wait is it allie-dar or alee-darr leo: .........i forgot! (it's alee-darr)

nyx: ARE YOU YEETING ME IN THE RIVER? heading to gnomengarde! alidaar fell in the river like a dipshit (he's fine) we are already making jorb's life hard bc he has to figure out auras on roll20

jorb: ..and you see a gnome. alidaar: howdy! jorb: and she says.. "strangers! good! i've been looking for someone to test this [crossbow contraption] on!" alidaar: NOOOOOOOOOOOOPE jorb: ROLL FOR INITIATIVE.

we have managed to de-initiative! alidaar still got shot though. he'll walk it off.

leo: delete my aura. my vibes are so rancid

tobias has been assigned sieron. we've found several gnomes! they are not shooting us. they also like mushrooms? "death corridor" is now the official term for the hallway where alidaar got shot. thanks facktore. im excited to learn all the silly gnome names-- FABLESTABLE? DABBLEDOB? I HAVE GREAT TIMING.

tobias: that explains the mushrooms. i wonder how they taste? alidaar: like mushrooms, i guess.

tobias has discovered the new gnomish invention, Barrel Crabs! "DO WE WANT TO FIT THE FUCKING *BINTURONG* IN THE BARREL CRAB?" "I AM NOW DUAL WIELDING CRABS."

tobias calls the binturong Friend! alidaar calls him Little Guy.

nyx: what's plan c? jorb: plan c is crabs. leo: I AM NOW DUAL WIELDING CRABS.

little guy is biting through the string on the crossbows! jorb gets to figure out how to deal with this mechanically. HOLY SHIT IT WORKED time to roll initiative again! LITTLE GUY HAS 24 INITIATIVE HOLY FUK

jorb: nameless, what do you want to do? nyx: im going to jump on her face and bite it. - nyx: can i crawl up her? leo: crawling all over her like weevils michael: i believe they're called bishops.

little guy is crawling on facktore and biting her face.

"am i proficient in myself?" figured out how to set up ali's breath weapon in roll20! woo! im learning! we are absolutely ruining facktore's day lmao alidaar: i lean out and flip her off jorb: literally?! alidaar: I'M HERE TO CAUSE EMOTIONAL DAMAGE NOW (and then i ran in and managed to do some damage with my morningstar! and also rolled a nat1 on my dual weapon fighting thing. whoops)

[checks twitter] ah. the wyatts are arguing about putting thirteen in a blender and 3d printing. having a normal one.

combat done! we broke the spinny crossbow machine! and facktore is now ignoring us to fix it lmao.

alidaar: what you see is what you get. i'm a dragonborn, and [looks at tobias] you're human, right? you're a normal human man? you're a human bitch man? bastard? bastard man? you're normal?

my face hurts so fucking hard from laughing oh my godddddddd . we had to prove we weren't "shapechangers" (nevermind the druid) and . i accidentally charlie'd too hard. tobias: guess i've got to add that to my flaws, i'm a stinky bastard bitch man!

jorb: [as gnome] ..and my name is pog. leo: YESS!!!!!!!!!!!

alidaar: oh great, they've got windmills. tobias: nothign wrong with windmills. alidaar: theyve got FLOOR windmills, that's so out of date

i . was checking the blaseball library bc something got unredacted and apparenty we threw little guy into the pita cutter room???

tobias: ah, um, excuse me, mr pog?

notes probably gonna trail off bc im losing focus whoops

jorb: you see two gnomes having a very animated conversation. leo, tired: a very anime conversation. michael: with hair like that, what kinda other conversation can she have?

fibblestib and dabbledob...

king korboz has lost his shit and imprisoned king gnerkli! this is a problem

#leo chirps #dnd #doip.#okay this is more like it lmao

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screamcr · 5 years ago

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M E T A - S K Y R I M ( 001 . )

she doesnt dislike the country of the northern race of men, scarce though it is in the wild nature which calls her home, or the cold that grips her bones even when shes nearly pressed into the fire . she likes the vastness of the land, the wide expanse both above and below the land that seems too hard and cold to grow food, and yet they do, and the forgotten tunnels and caverns where she finds absolute safety and security from the those who seek her out, both thalmor and blades alike . thats where much of her time is invested, in the dwemer and nordic ruins, the veins of skyrim, where she can live to wonder and question the worlds lost to time - much like herself - and where she knows none will venture to seek her out ; its a fools errand, dwemer defenses are notoriously dangerous and draugr do a great job of protecting their burrows .

though there are a few holds where she finds herself drawn to thrive, places where they still hold their beliefs above some treaty made by an imerpial emperor . her favourite place to disappear is falkreath, the forest is dense and the fog swallows her songs with a hunger none can compare ; a place where she can make herself just another ghost story, another body to bury within the massive cemetery that gives falkreath some prestige . she can thrive amongst the trees, the quiet, where the land provides everything she could need from food to weaponry to more furs to keep her warm . they need not know she exists, need not worry for thalmor agents to come snooping for her, nor worry for things to go missing ; she is content, satiated, and able to live completely unknown .

how, though, she adores whiterun ; the breezy atmosphere, the beautiful expanse just outside the walls, and the safety of neither racial disparities nor thalmor involvement . her favourite spot to pilfer, her favourite place to play as she climbs higher than any have gone since the construction and her laughs becomes songs sung around the hearth of the bannered mare ; she can be a common nuisance at dragonsreach, sitting among the banisters where spiders and birds might nest, tuning a lute or humming a song as she listens to the foreign politics from below ; they’re too lenient in her eyes, more akin to the bosmeri forms of punishment which shes learned are seen as quite disagreeable here . the only downside are the prying questions into the dragons crisis, the wonders of what she plans to do and when it shall end ; questions she doesnt have answer to, questions she doesnt want to think about .

she just wants to live, cant they understand that ?

windhelm is a reluctant hideaway for a reluctant dragonborn . she doesn’t like the cold, doesn’t like how cold the glares are when she first entered and watched as neighbors suspect neighbors for spies, nords blaming elves for their problems and failures ; she wasn’t a dark elf, but even still she felt the atmosphere in her wake, keeps to the grey quarters with malborn . its for the same reason she lurks within the crumbling walls - walls she knows were made by elves forced at the hands of atmorans, befitting for the town - malborn and her know the thalmor would never be able to reach them, never be able to bring down the walls without heightened retaliation, and for that they endure . like the nords in winter, she endures like the shadows, helping where she can - though not always entirely legal by most - so that the grey quarters can be at least a glimmer of warmth so far north .

#。 ➳ ❛ meta #* i have drafts filled with unfinished meta #have finished one *

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blookmallow · 6 years ago

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so it turns out windhelm is not a very friendly place at all

i read something about dark elves living in windhelm in one of my books, and also heard it was the stormcloak capital so i made my way there to see if i could learn anything about that

i very quickly learned it is Not actually a good place to be a dark elf at all

why can i even say this lmao. “yes, you should definitely be racist toward me. i dont belong here”

how fucking rude do you gotta be to say this to my face fuck you

me: [minding my own business]

this random fuck: hello I love racism

i didnt even pick a fight with him he just walked up and started threatening me so we ended up getting into a tavern brawl (and everyone else in the room was just like YEAH GET HIM lmao)

i completely smashed him and hes scared of me now but still continues wandering around being racist and awful. i REALLY want to kill him lmao but i dont think hes. killable. i gave a valiant effort but he just gets staggered for a minute and wont die even if i just walk up to him and take a sword to his face (i got very frustrated and was reloading from saves just trying to see if it was Possible to kill him) (i thought maybe my arrows just werent doing enough damage or something bc i was trying to stealth kill him so i could get away with it but. nah he just doesnt die)

why the fuck is this guy of all people immortal. is it because they anticipated players wanting to kill him and were like “fuck you”

had a very surreal moment in candlehearth hall; heard the voice of a woman singing (the only female bard I had ever seen at this point didn’t sing, just played music, so I hadn’t heard this before)

she had a very pretty voice but i couldn’t figure out where it was coming from, and she was singing a song about the Dragonborn

so it was just. this weird moment of “who is this woman she sounds beautiful but where is she!!” “wait she’s singing about me”

i found her eventually and managed to accidentally time it perfectly so that her song about the arrival of the Dragonborn ended the moment i walked up to her. it was a very strange experience

she also sings a song in praise of Ulfric and the stormcloaks, which is oddly the exact same song I’ve heard other bards singing in praise of the empire calling for Ulfric’s death, with the words slightly changed

which could just be lazy writing, but to me it seems to imply that either the original song was written by the rebels and later appropriated by the empire, or that the original was written by the empire to spread negative impressions of the stormcloaks but was then reclaimed by them as a kind of “the empire’s propaganda is our battle cry now” defiance and im not sure which one i like better (and have no idea which one it actually is) (or. if it’s just laziness lmao)

h....hm. thats. terrifying,

im dying though bc years ago i found this one audio post of someone doing a kermit imitation and saying the dark brotherhood oath with stabbing noises in the background and like. i didnt know what it Was i just thought it was hilarious

so my only context for that oath is “dark kermit” and i was not prepared to run into the actual thing in its original context i still read it in that kermit voice i hate this :’ )

EXCUSE ME THERE IS A CHILD SLEEPING ON THE STONE IN THE SNOW THIS IS NOT OKAY ?? ? ??

I THOUGHT SHE WAS FUCKING DEAD

oh no here we go again

i know i probably shouldn’t impulsively adopt the first two orphaned children i find but. she’s gonna fucking die out here WHY DOESNT ANYONE DO ANYTHING. WHY WONT THE INNKEEPER LET HER STAY THERE OR SOMETHING

shes selling flowers to try to stay alive and i dont need them but i bought All of them

hmm

ah. i see

im guessing this is probably like. a mystery shack tourist thing where its just an empty book and he tells everyone the Book Of Fate story and just watches them freak out when they see that its blank for them im laughing

this little museum is so good

i forget what started me on the quest originally but people were talking about how this house was Cursed and you should Never Go There so naturally i picked the lock and snuck in, immediately overhearing This going on, but thATS A CHILD’S VOICE WHAT THE FUCK IS HAPPENING IN HERE

OH this is bad. this is so bad what the fuck what the fuck

KID WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU THINK YOU’RE DOING

ALSO WHERE DID YOU EVEN GET THIS STUFF

i guess the bEST case scenario is he stole it from a grave,

so hes an orphan who got sent to an orphanage that turned out to be run by, he claims, an evil woman he hates so fucking much he tried to summon the dark brotherhood to kill her

i found him first and played along with it so now he thinks im a dark brotherhood assassin. im gonna go check it out and see what the fuck is going on later

yikes,

aventus, a kid who now owns a home because his parents are both dead, was sent to an orphanage to be cared for because the jarl couldn’t allow him to live there alone unsupervised, yet sofie is out there starving in the cold trying to sleep on the stone streets and selling flowers to stay alive and he doesnt do a goddamn fuckin thing for her. explain this

i still dont totally get the politics of this land but i dont think i trust ulfric at all actually

and this city is the first time ive encountered people being actively racist and hostile toward me for being a dark elf, so like, even though my first impulse was to side with the stormcloaks (bc Rebels Fighting The Tyranny Of The Government, the imperials tried to execute me and several of them without a trial or explanation, religious persecution, ) i dont think i like them either

#lucy plays skyrim

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clownhex · 6 years ago

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Dragonborn, dwarf, half-elf, tiefling!

dragonborn: Give at least (one) unpopular opinion on something.

-i think st/ar--w-ars is overrated and boring, new and old. maybe if i had found the series on my own instead of having shoved down my throat by like half my immediate family i wouldve liked it but,,, shrug emoji (same goes for st@r7r3k)dwarf: Talk about a skill you either know or would like to learn!

-id love to learn sign language!! i go nonverbal sometimes and im hoh anyway so itd be a neat skill to havehalf-elf: Where would you build your dream home?

-somewhere that doesnt get very hot with a pretty view, great internet, and no immediate neighborstiefling: What is the best or worst first impression you’ve ever made?

-one time in highschool, i went to a pride prom with friends, but they immediately ditched me bc i didnt know them that well and they had other friends to party with, so i ended up helping with the cleaning up. so like, i was popping balloons to toss out with this mildly cute dude and was trying to pop them without like, making a whole lot of noise? (you gotta make the tiniest of holes near where its tied) and one popped right in my face and scared me and i yelped and said “i didnt expect it to pop like that,,,” and the dude i was with laughed a bit and kept going. but what i didnt know is that one of the chaperones i had noticed following me around literally the entire time (i think she thought i was suspicious bc i was from another school and this was like, a multiple school event) scoffed at me and said in like the most snide tone “you thought it wasnt going to make a noise?” and i got really embarrased. sidenotes about that night: i was really sick but i wanted to go anyway but i ended up sitting down and away for most of the party, i think the chaperone was a trans woman bc if i remember right she had a she/her pin on and a trans pride one too and whenever i saw her i was just like “i wish youd stop looking at me like that im not a creep im just kinda sick and also not out yet”

#anon #ask game #you got more than u bargained for sorry #Anonymous

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kaironlokethor · 7 years ago

Text

Meat Shield to the rescue!

< LAST FIRST NEXT>

We have a Tiefling rogue, a dragonborn fighter, a half-elf rogue, and a changling druid/warlock

---

DM: So Tiefling, you notice an androgynous tiefling across the bar making eyes at you. Not even trying to hide it, they are flirting with you Tiefling: I am really drunk [after a drinking game] aren’t I? DM: Yeah, you’re really wasted Tiefling: -Okay, I go up to the other tiefling, and hand them one of my stolen copper wedding rings- Return this tomorrow morning, if you’re still interested -And then I stumble up to my room and pass the fuck out- Changling: I WANT TO GO AND STEAL HER DM: It is not a “Her,” you do not know their gender yet. And no, you’re too drunk, you just start talking to a Dwarf and get conned into playing a game of noggins -We all go the fuck to sleep, Changling looses the game of Noggins lol, I wake up the next morning and stumble back downstairs hungover as fuck- Tiefling: -I look around looking to see if the other tiefling is still there- DM: Oh, they are, and they are still here, and they are still making eyes at you Tiefling: I start chatting with them-- WAIT ARE THEY A PROSTITUTE?? DM: What? Tiefling: An attractive, androgynous tiefling making eyes at me in a shady tavern? Are they a prostitute? DM: You’ll need to figure it out Tiefling: I don’t want to just ask...that might offend them! DM: Then you’ll need to figure it out Tiefling: ....Hey, What is someone like you doing in a tavern like this? DM(as the other tiefling): Oh, you know, good drink, good food, attractive folk Tiefling: attractive folk, of course. attractive folk with....deep pockets? DM(as the other tiefling): Why do you ask....? Tiefling: You know...in this...well to do tavern...expensive food....expensive board....folk here must be....heavy spenders, if you know what I mean. DM(as the other tiefling): ...Are you a prostitue? Tiefling: What?? No! DM:(as the other tiefling): I’m not judging, I just...I am not interested, sorry. I thought this was something else Tiefling: No! I am interested! Very interested! -Anyway, one thing leads to another and I end up taking the other tiefling up to my room for a real great time that involved having to mute the skype chat. I come back down limping/waddling...I think it’s worth noting I am a male tiefling, as is the other tiefling and apparently mine bottomed- Changling: So....you have a good time up there? Tiefling: Even you can’t ruin my mood Changling: You didn’t get anyone pregnant, did you? (They still don’t know the other tiefling’s gender and have assumed them to be female) Half-elf: Yeah, we can’t worry about children right now Tiefling: Don’t worry, we’re pretty safe Half-elf: There aren’t any condoms, though, so you could have Changling: Roll for pregnant! Half-elf: Roll for child! -Halfelf and Changling start chanting “Roll for child!”- DM: -sighs- Fine, Tiefling, roll Tiefling: I rolled.....crit fail Changling: Does that mean? Half-elf: TIEFLING HAS A CHILD DM: Yes, Tiefling, I regret to inform you that you are pregnant -Half-elf and Changling are ultra confused for a moment. Changling starts to catch on, Half-elf just....doesnt- Half-elf: What? Why? How? DM: Well, Tiefling here was bottom, so -Half-elf remained confused until we informed him that the other tiefling was a guy and dicked down our tiefling real good. He shut up after that-

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-We go to a stables to get some horses. There are only 3 horses and 4 of us. I try to call over the owner to inquire but he was out back so I went to see- DM: So you see the stable owner out back fighting with this giant, snarling warg Tiefling: I grab my mace and growl back at it DM: It turns to you and snarls Tiefling: I growl and step towards it DM: You walk right up to it, nose-to-nose, both snarling Tiefling: I grab his snout and force him to the ground -I roll too low on strength- DM: It fights you Tiefling: I fucking bite it on the ear -I roll a 19 on this one- DM: Yeah, the warg now respects you as the leader of the pack... Tiefling: -I walk back around the front, brushing shoulders with the owner as I walk by- You owe me DM: So, now what do you want to do Tiefling: Well, we are just going to pick up our horses! DM (as the owner): Well...uhh...I know we have 3 for sale, but I haven’t seen any dropped off...These fine horses are 20 gold Tiefling: -I place my hand on the Warg’s shoulder- Good sir, don’t you remember, these are OUR horses. DM: Okay, roll for intimid-- Changling: We didn’t drop these horses off! DM: Officially with disadvantage Tiefling: -I grab my daggar and walk over to Changling. I press the tip of my daggar under his chin enough to barely draw blood, and slide it forward- You watch your goddamn motherfucking mouth. DM: So, what did you roll? Tiefling: 18....and.....4....so that would come to a 16 with my modifier DM: -The owner glares at you- I said 20 gold. Tiefling: Wtf?? What did he roll? DM: He rolled a 17 Tiefling: WOW I SURE WISH I GOT TO KEEP MY FIRST ROLL OF FUCKING 17 CHANGLING! Changling: What? How was I supposed to know I should keep my mouth shut? Tiefling: Whatever, I have my mount, you three figure your shit out. Wait, no. I buy one horse for Dragonborn. That’s it. Figure your shit out.

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Changling: So, how did you get that warg to trust you, anyway? Isn’t your animal handling 0? Tiefling: I bit it to assert dominance Changling: Wow....I want to bite my horse now!

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-We travel for a day, and camp at night. Me and Half-elf take first watch, and the Dragonborn takes second watch- DM: Roll for perception Dragonborn: 19? DM: Was that with disadvantage? You don’t have darkvision Dragonborn: .....4? DM: Yeah, so you don’t see this until it is right upon you, but the ground starts shaking. It wakes the other three up. You sit up and see this huge, lumbering Storm Giant walking towards you. Roll initiative -So this get throws a boulder at Dragonborn who needs to retreat so I can hand him a healing potion cause he was HURTING, and then Half-elf misses an attack, Changling misses an attack. I barely hit it with my handbow. It is our Dragonborn Fighter’s turn- Dragonborn: I roll to hit with my Vorpal Longsword.....NAT 20! DM: Nice! Roll 7 d8′s and 1 d10 and add 3 and then add 7...and then double it because of crit damage Dragonborn: -it takes him a while to roll and do the math like we wait for a solid minute while he rolls and counts- Um, 110 damage DM: 110? So like One-One-Zero? Dragonborn: Yup. Anyway, I get my second attack -rolls, hits, and gets 22 damage- and my third attack -again, rolls, hits, and gets 21- and then I am going to use my action surge to get a fourth attack -rolls, hits, and gets 12 damage- DM: So, just to be clear, you did a total of 165 damage in one turn. This guy is bloodied. He is hurting. He spits blood in the dirt and glares at you -Our dragon born ends up doing another 50 damage his next turn. I did a total of 15 damage, and our Half-elf got a hit off for 7 damage. Our dragonborn pretty much single-handedly took this motherfucker down- Dragonborn: -after the battle- Wait, I was calculating this wrong. I should have doubled my critical hit AGAIN. Also, my two rolls of 19 should have counted as critical because of this feat I have. DM: And done 220 damage? Dragonborn: Yeah, reading about this sword I was doing it wrong in battle DM: You could have downed that giant in one hit, you know Dragonborn: Just remember that next time, when my sword hits the table the fight is OVER (referring to earlier in the tavern when the changling was getting on my nerves, I stabbed my daggar into the table [my go-to intimidation in taverns], the changling drew his scimitar, and the Dragonborn ended the argument by slamming his lonsword on the table between us)

---

Half-elf: Wow, we would have been dead if it weren’t for Meat Shield Changling: Yeah, you’re a beefy tank Dragonborn: I was a scared tank there for a minute!

---

DM: What is your strength even at, Dragonborn? Dragonborn: 20, so +5 modifier -the entire party is in disbelief- Dragonborn: I couldn’t put any more into it.....i tried, but it wouldn’t let me. It’s maxed out

#D&D #DnD #Shit my players say #Tiefling #Dragonborn #Half-elf #Changling #nsfw?

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biorusted · 6 years ago

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I'd like to ask all of them for one of your Rose Gold members =3c Whichever one you'd like to talk most about!!

:00 okie hmmmmm ill do alittle about all of them!Names and ages n basic stuffs!

Priva- her full name is Privavit (Latin) and she honestly doesnt know a lot about her past, but she made the team going off what she knows (call it amnesia) - but with that, she doesnt know how old she is! She’s also an expert in magic, though she doesnt look it bc she never uses a wand or staff etc. She’s a lot more than what she seems.

Abigail- She chose her name herself so it really doesnt have any significant meaning and, in terms of her age- shes as old as dirt. (or so she tells Zinnia) out of comic colors, her skin is a pale gray and her main asperation in life is to become a god.

Alfida- (German) means ‘She who helps Elves’ she was given that name when she went out of her way to protect Abigail. From then on they’ve been a duo- thats how Priva found them. She’s about 50 in Orc years, but like ehhhhhhh 32 in human (?)

Ayanna- meaning Beautiful Flower. They are actually royalty, a high duchess of the spring court and a formidable opponent on the battle field- but they just chill in Priva’s hat (her hair smells nice) and occasionally teach Zinnia about Titania. Age wise- about 2 thousand years old- give or take - they dont keep track.

Zinnia- She was named after a flower meaning ‘Lasting Affection’ and is 3 months old. Alfy is who she considers to be Mom A, as Alfy worked the hardest to hatch her! Zinnia, as of yet in the comic, dont not have her special breath yet, as most baby dragonborn would have by this age. out of comic color, shes golden and very shinny.

#thanks for the ask!!!!!#<3 <3 <3 #team rose gold #I love all my gorls (plus Ayanna)

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bucephaly · 7 years ago

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1-10 for brand zaw :0?

Putting this under a readmore cuz it ended up being sorta long!

It’s a little unreasonable for everyone in a Middle Ages-esque fantasy to be perfectly literate, and writing with quills was considered legitimate labor! How well can your oc read and/or write? How detailed is their quest log/journal, if they keep one at all?

Already answered!

How educated is your oc? Did their parents teach them, did they have a tutor or were they apprenticed to a master, or did they attend a university? What university? What are they educated in? How long did their education take? (Learned skills like blacksmithing count here too!)

I’m not entirely sure about where/ how Zaw grew up/ was raised yet, so im not sure exactly, but i wanna say he was taught basic restoration and alchemy by whoever raised him, and he taught himself how to fight with staves just from defending himself on the roads in Cyrodiil, but he got a little bit of former teaching in that later on. He also was formally taught some restoration, and he was a healer and alchemist while he lived in the Imperial City.

Does your oc have any kind of crafting skills that either aren’t in-game or don’t have as much importance in-game as they would in real life? (For example, can your oc sew or weave, etc? Are they skilled in any kind of art? Can they make jewelry or work glass? Are they musicians? etc)

Zaw can sew some, but just enough to fix his own clothes. He can carve some, but he just does it for fun/ to pass the time!

What pantheon does your oc worship? If they worship the Cyrodiilic/Imperial pantheon, does that include Talos? If they secretly worship Talos, how do they justify hiding it?

Zaw doesnt specifically worship anything. He doesnt have any connection to the hist, and, though he spent some time as a healer at a chapel in Cyrodiil, he doesnt revere the Imperial pantheon either. He finds it interesting to learn how different cultures worship, and what spins they might have on the same gods. He did do the 7 pilgrimages of the Temple, but that was partially to learn about it, and partially as sorta a Guided Tour through Vvardenfell. He can respect the Tribunal for the good they’ve done and there’s no denying that they have godlike power, but the more he learns about the reason of their godhood and such, the more conflicted he gets. Meeting Vivec was an awkward situation for him.

How religious is your oc? Do they come into conflict with others over their beliefs? If their patron deity told them to do something extremely undesirable or against their moral compass, would they do it? Would your oc sell someone’s soul for a corn chip?

Sorta answered some of this above. He’s just.. not religious. He feels like he sorta has to make his own way in the world, and it’s weird for him to learn that this powerful god-like being is watching over and guiding him [Azura I mean], and he sorta feels like.. he isnt sure if he should be thankful for her help, or if he should hate her for using him against his will for revenge. Usually the latter.

Does your oc have a family of origin? How many members of their FoO are still living? Do they have a good relationship? How much contact does your oc have with their FoO? How in-the-loop is your oc’s FoO about your oc’s being Dragonborn/HoK/Nerevarine?

This is kinda unclear to me atm. Right now i think he was raised in a more imperialized part of Black Marsh/ one of the southern cities in Cyrodiil by an argonian family. [They werent his blood relations though, as he was exiled from his original clan because he was rejected by the Hist.] He learned how to be an argonian and about that culture, but he was far enough towards Cyrodiil that it didn’t matter quite as much that he had no connection to the hist, or that he kind of had trouble.. being an argonian. He left his family and moved to the Imperial City when he came of age, and he wrote to them occasionally. I don’t feel like he was super close to them, like he always sort of felt like he was Wrong and he didn’t really belong there. They don’t really know anything beyond his going to prison. Maybe sometime after Dagoth Ur is defeated, he could visit them.

What social class was your oc born into? Did they change classes at all? How?

His adoptive family weren’t really well-off, but they had enough to get by just fine. When Zaw moved to the Imperial City, it was pretty much the same thing. He made enough money to keep himself housed and fed.

How politically active is your oc? Are they obviously influential, or is their influence more subtle?

ooh shit thats.. tough. Zaw kinda... becomes a figure that can’t help but be political. Doesnt mean he.. likes it, or is any good at it. He completely doesnt know what he’s doing, and so it can be really hard for him to not be manipulated. He ends up kinda.. dropping off the map and living in a yurt on the coast with his boyfriend for a while, maybe.

What unplayable faction would/did your oc join, if any? Why?

He’s not really one for factions! they feel kind of clichey sometimes, so he’d rather sorta do his own thing. He did a couple quests for the mages’ and fighters’ guild though when he first arrived in Vvardenfell.

How trustworthy is your oc? Would they ever change opposing factions?

He’s pretty loyal if he knows one has good intentions. [Another reason factions arent for him; they often have motives that he doesnt care for.]

#brand zaw #asks #honestly? made a lot of this up on the spot!#hes just a dude that wants to do good but he wishes he wasnt forced into a situation where hes super influential and he isnt.. sure whats g #nemettabris

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rhuemis · 7 years ago

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13. Introduce your current party.

hoo boy so we got:

-Scales

-Rhys

-Jeckyl

-Isiah

imma put the lengthy descriptions under a read more aha

Scales ((I dont think Scales even has a surname lmfao)):

-Warlock but insists that hes the party medic

-A white dragonborn that was born without scales due to a birth defect who has more than a few screws lose, calls himself a ‘doctor’ and we cant quite tell whether thats the truth or not

-Grew up in a brothel and now travels with the party to gain ‘medical knowledge’ whatever that means

-Has dissected the corpse of a literal god, harvests organs from whatever we kill and puts them all into bottles and then offers to transplant them into you if you get even remotely injured

-Is already mildly possessed but then ate some of the tentacles from a weird squid god for fun and then got DOUBLE possessed and tentacles shot out of his mouth and we had to drag him to a temple

-Something burst out of his chest one morning and now its his familiar. We were all stood at the door to his room like ‘This is Scales, this could just be part of his morning routine for all we know.’

- Speaks with a heavy German accent which makes anything Scales does like 4000 times better

-Isiah has literally promised his corpse to Scales

- Despite his quirks is protective of his party and deserves a pat on the snoot every so often

Rhys Lignius

- Half-elf sorcerer that currently has more levels in warlock than sorcerer

- hes the mom friend of the group and is a pretty serious guy, hes the one who gets shit done but not before he monologues so hard that the rest of us party members say ‘oh fuck no im not listening to Rhys’ spiel again’

-Came from a very important family and is very proud of his Latian heritage, doesnt let you forget that hes a big fuckin deal lmao hes on a mission to do something in relation to his father but hes not quite spilled on exactly what yet, hes just trying to get to some ancient ruins

- Is so much of an actual loser that whenever he casts Prestidigitation he clicks his fingers and the whole party has started doing it back at him jokingly

-Despite being a square we all love him and hes probably the most reliable in the group. Lawful Good™.

-Flavours my bacon.

-Is the metaphorical designated driver of the party, cleans up after us shit monkeys.

-Is physically around 22 years old but might as well be 55 years old.

Jeckyl Corvus:

- Newest party member, a half-elf rogue that keeps getting cockblocked from actually stealing anything

-Wrote a really intense anonymous love letter to my character and slid it under his room door at a tavern a few years before the campaign started after watching him perform and recognises Isiah but Isiah doesnt realise it was him who wrote the letter yet

-Spent some time in gay baby jail for being part of a group of thieves that got bamboozled by a rich and powerful family and was abandoned by the people he thought of as family.

-Wanted to be a tailor in the years before his taste for adventuring kicked him in the nards. He ended leaving his family to go and explore but this decision ultimately ended up with his family being stripped of everything they had so now hes plagued by The Guilt™. Wants to eventually save/steal enough money to get his family back on it’s feet again.

-Rugged and handsome but the most important thing you need to know about Jeckyl is that he keeps a pet mouse in his pocket named Rupert and that one day Jeckyl wants to fucking transmute him into an owl or some shit because he just cannot be satisfied huh. ‘Oh Rupert was my only friend whilst I was living on the streets blah blah blah’ yeah sure tell that to his face whilst you go fuckin Fullmetal Alchemist on his ass. Love Rupert for the contents of his character, not his form smh.

-Acts suave and cool but loses all of that composure when it comes to Isiah. Would probably commit sepukku if Isiah died.

-Has a lot of knives, which Scales finds ‘respectable’.

-First combat fuckin crits the fish plant man that had Isiah grappled 15ft underwater out of sheer gay panic. RIP Shape of Water fish man, you’ll be sorely missed.

Isiah Vakalyn:

-My character so you know hes....really something. Half-elf bard.

-Comes from a weirdly strict family who were actually fucking cultists and were ((and probably still are)) planning on sacrificing him to a demon or some shit but Isiah didnt even notice this shit and still has no idea. He thought everybody was taught Infernal and that families were just like that. His family told him to become a bard and he obeyed. They told him study and he obeyed. They limited his interaction to the outside world and he only really started thinking for himself after he made his first proper friend who then also later fucked him over real bad.

-Ran away from home after being cucked by his “only friend” into maybe murdering her dad we dunno if he died or not but I sure did stab him a lot. She lied and told him she was being abused by her dad and Isiah saw red and agreed to her murder plot only to be abandoned midway through. He also pickpocketed for her for like a year beforehand bc she said she was poor. She was very not poor. Bring on the subsequent trust issues.

-Is a bard but hates getting attention so he wears a black rabbit mask when he performs in front anything that isnt a small crowd. He found that mask in his house so you know thats gonna be some spooky cult shit.

- Is only 5′4 and is very conscious of it. Luckily the party is very understanding and calls him ‘the halfling’ or ‘the midget’ lovingly to watch him implode.

-Once accidentally stole a dwarven baby. Named it Isiah jr.

-Has a pet eel named Illius who is the most fuckin talented eel you’ll ever find. He glows! He talks! He beats your ass at card games! Translates languages! We found him behind a door that was sealed by magic and was only opened after Isiah played the music notes on the map we found. Those notes were an exert of a song by the most famous of all bards, Rickus Astelyus. Lo and behold behind the door was a huge tanks with a heckin good boy inside and Isiah adopted him IMMEDIATELY. Loves bacon bits and scritches.

-Received an anonymous love letter a few years back that gives him major anxiety and literally avoids the city he got it from. RIP Jeckyl youre gonna have to talk to him about that, Isiah is oblivious and has no idea lmao.

- Loves to eat bacon and recently bought out the bacon from the local tavern. Feeds some to Illius because its what he deserves. He’s also currently carrying a fuckton of bread, cheese, jam, and flour. Food is practically his way of diplomacy as he gives some to whoever he meets. It’s almost like his way of nervous self-defence. When tentacles shot out of Scale’s mouth Isiah just started shovelling bread into the tentacles and Scales woke up feeling incredibly full lmao.

-Has also in his inventory: a gay erotica book, a romance novel in a language he cant read, a rainbow slinkie, a magic mood ring that gives him poison resistance, 6 wolf teeth, a wolf leg bone, some gems, 4 days worth of rations on top of all the food he already has, a violin, a flute, and a fancy lute that he found in Illius’ chamber.

-Hes just nervous but loud mouthed and contradicts himself a lot. Anxious and eccentric. Says that hes just a bard and wasnt meant for any kind of greater scheme but the universe has other plans.

-Was once dabbed at by the god of entertainment, Apollon. ((Apollon is the only god Isiah really cares about lmao)).

and despite him not being in the party anymore im gonna give honorary mention to my favourite skyrim-glitch-of-a-barbarian, Florys:

-Was the character of a guy who played with us for one session. At the beginning of the next session he was on webcam with us all and we were about to start playing when suddenly his camera cut out and he went offline and weve literally not seen from him since. He’s not been online in over a month now. Some common theories in our group is that hes off fighting ISIS or got arrested for weed right there and then.

-Due to this weird player disappearance our DM, Benjamin, had to take control of Florys whilst we looked for a new party member. In the session that the player disappeared from we didnt know if he was gonna come back or not so Benjamin had Florys suddenly contract a horrific stomach bug and was just in the tavern toilet presumably making a fuckin hole in the floor with the noise it apparently made lmfao Isiah actually had to try and play music over the top of Florys’ shitfest at one point and only just managed to drown the sound out. But as time went by days were eventually passing in the campaign and the player still hadnt come back so poor Florys was not having a great time in the bathroom for several DAYS.

-Eventually the DM realised that this player was not gonna come back and that the party was short on a tank so he started piloting Florys for a while to accompany us on our quest ((and miraculously recovering from his terrifying stomach illness)) but hed forgotten how the player said Florys was so just was making shit up on the fly. I specifically remember the original player of Florys saying ‘Oh Florys isn’t like those stereotypical dumb barbarians’ which is why I lost my shit when the Florys being piloted by the DM turned around and said ‘What the fuck is a triangle?’ ... Florys is practically brain-damaged at this point, I think it might be the DMs retribution for the player disappearing lmao

-Threw all of his hand axes into a river during one fight and then into a cieling the next, which provoked Isiah to jokingly call out: ‘Oh, Florys! You’re so handsome and cool!’ which Florys with his last 2 braincells took seriously. The handsome and cool line became an on-running meme and gets used whenever any of us fucks up lmao

-For some reason grew rlly attached to a piano he found in Illius’ chamber and carried it around with him out of two parts stubborness two parts piano LUST.

-We ended up using him as a mule to carry all of our heavy shit bc he’d just do it and he literally wouldn’t think anything of it.

-We found a giant birds nest and Florys for some reason picked it up and carried it away and got fucking kidnapped by a giant bird so now hes literally just in fucking sky somewhere sat in a birds nest and being flown around which is wild bc we expected the DM to just kill Florys but instead hes just in the fucking sky where he belongs. Like legit hes just sat in there. Hes just in the sky. Godspeed.

HEAVES I could write so much more but this is already incredibly lengthy so here take it

also @redthebattler idk if any of this would be interesting to you lmao

#dnd ask #Anonymous

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