#the lang brothers were insane for this

[booksandicedmatcha]

WHY DOES IT HURT TO LOVE YOU

WHY AM I IN PAIN

WHY DOES IT HURT TO KNOW YOU

YOU'LL LET ME DOWN AGAIN

IF I TURNED MY INSIDES OUT WOULD YOU EVEN KNOW THAT I WAS THERE

WHY DOES IT HURT TO LOVE YOU

WHY DOES IT HURT TO LOVE

[lycorogue]

One Piece NoPixel

Ever since the 4.0 launch of NoPixel (a private GTA Online roleplay server), my husband and I have become OBSESSED with the Yuno Sykk storyline going on.

Considering Sykkuno has been streaming NoPixel for roughly 8hrs every day, there's no way I can fully keep up, so my insomniac husband tends to give me recaps the following day. As he's telling me the story and is trying to get me to understand the relationship ties between characters I had an epiphany: Yuno is just Luffy from One Piece.

People already joke that Sykkuno has "plot armor" and is the "main character", so his GTA character Yuno being Luffy already kind of fits. Plus, both Yuno and Luffy are ADHD/Autistic balls of chaos that are also unintentionally beams of charisma that attracts just about everyone to their side. It doesn't matter how insane the plan is, if Luffy/Yuno says it people will follow through. You also have the fun of wondering if Luffy/Yuno is just insane with godly amounts of luck that allows their plan to work out, or if they are secretly geniuses that had already calculated everything in the background and the plan worked because of that discrete planning (or if it's a happy combo of the two). Luffy and Yuno are both almost impossibly optimistic and goofy, and people INSTANTLY know to take these boys seriously the second they become serious. If Luffy/Yuno stop smiling, you KNOW shit is about to go down! Also, Luffy/Yuno is INSANELY loyal and protective of his found family. On multiple occasions, Yuno has been informed that if he were to betray the speaker that would kill their last bit of faith in humanity, because if they know ANYTHING it's that Yuno doesn't lie and doesn't betray. Much like Luffy.

OK, so Yuno Sykk is Monkey D. Luffy (If Yuno's name wasn't just Sykkuno's I wouldn't be surprised if he had included the D. initial).

I then thought about those around Yuno. While the personalities don't work one-to-one, my husband and I were able to map a lot of Yuno's friends onto Luffy's simply based on relationship ties.

First is obvious. Yuno, through the 3.0 adoption chaos, ended up the adopted grandson of cop (and eventual Police Commissioner) Sam Baas. So, Baas is Garp. The fish-name connection is just a bonus.

Next up is the inspiration to both start an illegal lifestyle and to become the best possible at it. A pseudo-father-figure and mentor. The man whose blessings and pride in Luffy/Yuno is just about everything to the boy: Lang Buddha as Yuno's Shanks.

Luffy/Yuno couldn't get as far as he does without his true ride-or-die. The man who is loyal to a fault. Who will gladly give his life to not only save his best friend and brother, but also to simply lift him higher, if that's what's requested of him. A man who will smile as he participates in mass murder, and whose homicidal tendencies are surprisingly calmed when around Luffy/Yuno: Raymond Romanov as Yuno's Roronoa Zoro

The personalities don't really match, and YMMV when it comes to this ship, but 4.0 brought about Yuno's "relationship arc". This introduced us to a woman that Yuno loves spending time with, is very protective of, and joys in making her smile. She is there to comfort Yuno, but understands that he needs to do things his way and on his own sometimes. Yuno keeps saying that they're only best friends, and that may be true. He may honestly have no romantic interest in her, despite her obvious romantic interest in him. Even so, she's His Person and he wants to be with her and protect her as much as possible. If there's one person that Luffy/Yuno cares about that you DO NOT mess with, it's her. Ladies and gents, meet Yuno's Nami: Lottie Mae

On the flipside, we have a woman who started off as an enemy, but was instantly charmed by the lengths Yuno would go to in order to help someone that had threatened him. Someone who has family who viciously protects her. Someone who is completely smitten despite Yuno not really giving as many "I want to be in a romantic relationship" vibes as he does with Lottie. Someone who clearly has a jealous streak to her. The main person people seem to ship with Luffy/Yuno behind Nami/Lottie. Our own Tsundere Queen: Gigi Costello as Yuno's Boa Hancock

Next up is a man who is a more serious leader who doesn't approve of Luffy/Yuno's shenanigans, but he also can't deny the results, so he begrudgingly gives Luffy/Yuno free rein. He still tries to talk some sense into Luffy/Yuno and his friends, and they do listen to him on occasion, but those moments are few and far between. He also can't ignore Luffy/Yuno's charisma, and, in spite of himself, he's equally drawn in to the King of Chaos. Congratulations, Tommy T. You are Yuno's Trafalgar Law.

We then have someone who is older. Someone who is a bit of a mentor, but also would gladly follow Luffy/Yuno. Someone who was once a leader himself, but has since disbanded his own crew (or, at least, left them). Someone who is incredibly protective of Luffy/Yuno, but also understands that the kid can hold his own (for the most part). Someone who can't fathom Luffy/Yuno ever betraying anyone. Someone who is a master a steering??? This one is a little bit of a stretch, but my husband believes that Tony Corleone is Yuno's Jimbe.

Finally, we have someone who is a pseudo-ally to Luffy/Yuno, almost begrudgingly. Someone whose goals differ from Luffy/Yuno's and those differing goals caused tension for a bit before the two decided to break off from each other. Someone who has a sort of 1920s gangsta vibe with his underground gambling and mob-like connections. A man whose main goal deep down is to find a family of his own. Marty Banks as Yuno's Capone Bege

My husband also thinks that Benji Ramos would be Yuno's Sanji, mostly due to the incessant flirting with little-to-no success. Also, Mickey Sinclaire as Usopp due to Mickey being a cowardly schemer and master liar. I'm still on the fence for both of those. This list was largely mapping parallels on how these characters relate to Luffy vs how they relate to Yuno. The Benji and Mickey parallels are more about their personalities pairing with One Piece characters.

I think that will have to be a different list, though.

So, NoPixel/One Piece fans, what do you think? Does this work? Would you have picked other character parallels? Are there others we didn't think of?

[potokguy]

The Shimerman Chronicles

Set in Somewhere, SW, USA, 2009.

Sheila Shimerman: Focal character of whatever story is going on in my head. Complete nerd loser. Best friend of Bernie Chaykovsky. Sister of Leonard Shimerman. Obsessor over Danielle Toledano. She cries in the passenger’s seat of Bernie’s car whenever he drives her back home from her dorky lesbian book club because he added a k.d lang CD to their regular rotation and jams out while she languishes about the personal significance Ingénue has to her. She doesn’t smoke weed because she has asthma. She wears her glasses sincerely and her t-shirts ironically. She’s got lots of growing up to do, but there’s no way she can’t do anything.

Bernie Chaykovsky: He’s Sheila’s best friend because he makes her look cool by comparison. Well, actually, they’ve known each other since they were little kids and have stayed friends because they’re both the same kind of weird and care about each other much like a brother and sister (and yes, they fight more than Sheila and her actual brother). Driven mostly by desperation in his life, whether it be desperation to be loved, liked, admired, laughed at, spoken to, he’s a desperate character. This obvious desperation leads to teasing, which leads to more desperate attempts at being likable and smart and cool. He’s been nicknamed “Bernard ‘Jerkoffsky,’” but he laughs in the face of the epithet…mostly because he doesn’t get how it’s supposed to be mean and not hilarious. When not needing, or feeling the need, to impress anybody, he really is cool and funny and energetic and full of laughs. All in all, he is a great friend, even if he isn’t the deepest guy ever. He’s hopelessly infatuated with Sheila’s brother, Leonard, who kind of thinks he’s funny, but hardly ever looks at him that way. Sheila thinks he’d make a really annoying in-law.

Leonard Shimerman: He’s Sheila’s “idiot brother” who is actually pretty sharp. He’s only two years older than Sheila, but that’s enough. He still sees Sheila as “a baby.” They aren’t as close as they were when they were younger, but he’s the Agnes to her Tilly in a way. He’s the older sibling who doesn’t always get her, but he loves her. Contrary to how Sheila would describe him, he’s a pretty smart and gentle dude. He’s not a huge part of her life since he’s not living in their old town anymore, but when he comes to visit, they always have fun, going to a movie or out to dinner. Of course, her little friend Bernie always wants to tag along, though…

Danielle Toledano: The object of Sheila’s affections and the coolest chick she’s ever met. She’s treated like a queen by Sheila. Not exactly a loser, but not really a success yet. She’s going to school, working on finding a job, and she never stopped believing that she’s really secretly a genius. Still, she’s always treading like the ground could crumble underneath her if she made a wrong step. Just a little self-obsessed. She has delusions of grandeur. She is insane but in a very contained way. Hasn’t watched T.V in 5 years, and she has a superiority complex about it. Most people actually find her insufferable, but she’s irresistible to Sheila. She has short blonde hair and several piercings. She has been told about Sheila’s infatuation with her, but has never really believed it (“Jerkoffsky’s a fuckin’ yarn spinner, man. Remember when he swore Len Shimerman took him to see “A Four Letter Word?” He couldn’t even say hi to him without laughing like a dumbass!”)

[7grandmel]

Todays rip: 06/03/2024

Should auld acquaintance be forgot, and the days of high quality rips?

Season 7 Featured on: Rips of Christmas Present

Ripped by berg8793

Requested by itsyeeted! (Discord)

Funny thing - I was supposed to have posted this far closer to new years, but then somehow convinced myself that I'd...already posted it? Just marked it as done in the spreadsheet and everything. Bizarre. Well, its never too late to celebrate the new year, is it? Especially not with a rip as sincere, wholesome, downright pleasant as Should auld acquaintance be forgot, and the days of high quality rips? - This is the kind of rip to remain on the laid-back playlist all year long.

I'm sure a lot of people were a bit puzzled to see a game like Tetris on CDi even *get* rips, let alone any form of non-ironic memes. I mean, its the Philips CDi, it's the meme console with Hotel Mario and the bad Zelda games! But this is another case of what I brought up back in Viva La Robocop, another case of one of SiIva's most fascinating phenomena: when otherwise wholly obscure games are kept in discussion through the surprising quality of their music. With only some exceptions (such as the games composed by the Follin brothers) that discussion seldom becomes widespread, usually staying contained to enthusiasts of VGM: such as the very people behind the SiIvaGunner channel itself! And while many of these soundtracks are kept relevant by chiptune artists, with examples like the aforementioned one, Never Gonna Give Up Mahjong and Beautiful! ~ Curveball of Sean Kingston - Tetris on CDi is, as the name of the console suggests, full-on CD quality, with a sound so stunning beautiful and atmospheric for a game series otherwise so content in reusing and remixing the typical Tetris theme. In the words of Jack Yarwood - "Before 'Tetris Effect,' There Was the Vaporwave Bliss of Tetris on the CD-i".

The wonderous atmosphere of this otherwise entirely obscure release of Tetris has kept its heart beating ever so faintly in the 32 years since its release, and Should auld acquaintance be forgot, and the days of high quality rips? feels just as much like a love letter to this game's vibes as it does a soothing celebration of the new year's beginning. Level 6's soothing tune is used as the backing instrumental to an original cover of the Scottish folk song Auld Lang Syne, one typically sung to inaugurate the beginning of the new year. And it's one that I, despite being from all the way over in Sweden, swear I must've heard in a film or show at some point - its lyrics and melody felt immediately comforting and familiar as soon as I started listening to the rip. Part of that comfort is of course the vocals, berg8793's vocal performance is positively soothing, but it may also be from how the vocal performance is implemented into the rip. It's given a layer of compression to it that matches the quality of early CD games, and indeed the quality of the CDi games' soundtracks themselves, a comfy faint noise and static stitching the two pieces of the rip together as a seamless whole. berg8793 has previously mostly been featured on here in rips that appeared as if they were borderline painful to make, such as Banjostruck and Kirby Joins the Circus!, so it was a delightful surprise to see him having made a rip like this. Should auld acquaintance be forgot, and the days of high quality rips? not only feels like a welcome break in energy from the guy's typical output, but also shows me that he's got a genuine talent for singing - one I hope he finds use of in rips to come!

There's little else to say - Should auld acquaintance be forgot, and the days of high quality rips?, much like Wham! Into Dreams, feels like a cover from the heart, a cover made with the intent of pure celebration, to band us faithful viewers together for the new year in the comments section. Amidst all the shitposts and insane-scale collaborations, it's...nice, to have rips like these to return to for the quieter moments in life.

[thirdworldearthling]

UltraelectromagneticHIGH

December 22, 2022. SMDC Festival Grounds. ERASERHEADS. Huling El Bimbo.

Bombarded by birthday greetings from family, friends, colleagues and insurance company 😂.

Today is gonna be the day that they're gonna throw it back to...me? Haha!

Eraserheads will be playing their final (final?!?) reunion concert in PH. I was the happiest person in the entire universe when I learned that they're going to play on my birthday. No more questions asked, no buts and ifs, I will be there come hell or high water, even dead and cold hahaha!

Dizizit! Bzzzt bzzzt! I'm going to experience once more (or for the last time?) that euphoric feeling, nostalgic ecstacy - ultraelectromagnetichigh.

The Diegos started stepping on the gas at around 8:00 P.M. to fill our dehydrated souls with music that we, the heads generation, love to death.

The 90s kid in me started giggling and mumbling, with the occasional head bounce (cannot do the head bang now, vertigo will kill me 😵‍💫) and stomping, eyes closed, to entirely feel the moment. OPM Megahits from FrancisM, Yano, Wolfgang, Razorback, P.O.T., Pu3ska and even Gary V were included in their catalogue, combined with the famed 90s anthem from Nirvana, RATM, RHCP, Cypress Hill, Beck, Salt-N-Pepa, Naughty by Nature, Arrested Development, Mastaplann, Breeders, The Cardigans, Blur, Daft Punk, Chemical Brothers, Beastie Boys, Fatboy Slim and merry more. They capped off their set with Teeth's Laklak, which heightened our sentimental senses and rebellious teen spirit.

8:30 P.M. The whole festival grounds went black and silent (just for a few seconds). Then the jumbo LED screens flashed a montage of Eheads' journey counting down to this epic finale.

5. 4. 3. 2. 1. Wooooooooooooohhhhh!!!

Lights off. All of us are guessing the first song. My previous assumptions were Fruitcake (why not? it's christmas time!), Superproxy (coz of the main producer's bragging of the hologram tech that made the ticket prices soar high way up in the sky 🤣) & Pop Machine (this is my current favorite). And then baaaaam! We all went insane and in flames!

We were all screaming our hearts out. Although the audio and visuals were disappointing (we barely hear the solid sound of guitars/bass, the screen display at the Moshpit/VIP section was out of sync with the music), our energies were intensified more than ever. Sing. Scream. Jump. Bounce. Stomp. Repeat. Then Elmo, Arkin and Eon went down the main stage to perform with their respective dads, and the much-awaited hologram of the great Francis Magalona unfolded right before our fiery eyes. I must admit that I am not impressed with the 3-D moving figure (with that ticket price they could've done better), but the illusion of him performing was undeniably a feast.

Oh my God. They're going to shove the whole Cutterpillow album to our face! The album art at the back of their most successful album were flashed one by one in the screen. BTW, I love their all black outfit for the 1st set.

Upon hearing Raymund's familiar drum patterns, we screamed in unison again. Saan ka nagtungo, tumila na ang ambon, sana man lang naghintay kahit na konting sandali, weee weee weee!!! (takatakatakatak) Sorry for all the people near me recording that important moment of your lives, you'll definitely hear my voice singing along, that was unforgivably cringeworthy. 🤣You can still hear my voice and it gets more annoying as the night progresses.

When they played Overdrive, we were loaded with nitro boost during the whole song and we stand by near the end, not sure if we wanted to hear the monologue of Marcus (Pare 'di na magstart yan, buti pa kain na lang tayo) or let them proceed onto the next song.

Slo mo. They let Ely rest for a bit. Raymund on vocals! Also one of my favorites, I love every bit of this masterpiece (written by the 4 geniuses). My twitter username was inspired by this song.

Another trip down the memory lane - Huwag mo nang itanong - I was in 5th or 6th grade when this song was released. It made me laugh when I first heard the line, "ewan ko, hindi ko alam, pwede bang huwag na lang nating pag-usapaaaaan. Huwag mo nang itanong sa akin, 'di ko rin naman sasabihin", I thought, oh dear, that was sooooo me haha! I don't talk much when I was younger (until now?), that was a waste of time for me, I value my solitude more than the nonsense chitchats.

Next! First time to hear Paru-Parong Ningning live. Though Raymund & Ely were upbeat, I was unable to move because I'm having cramps hahaha (signs of aging). Standing still while enduring the agonizing pain, I didn't want to be pulled out of the concert grounds. I just need water and I'll be fine 😂

I'm still singing and dancing with the crowd (even with recurring cramps haha) and then Raymund strikes again! Yoko - A very fitting song for the current madness we have these days. "Tigilan na 'tong raket, raket ng gobyerno, 'di ko na kelangan ng pang-aabuso niyo" / "milyon-milyong pilipinong estudyante, tumiwalag, palayain ang sarili!"

Ely showcased his acoustic guitar prowess, singing along with the crowd, as Fill her ended the first set.

The 30-minute break started with Cutterpillow playing in the background of the countdown timer. I used to have a cat, who wouldn't ever wanna get fat! I kept singing while in a rush to buy water. Aaaaaaahhh my throat was dry and painful. But I don't care, I'm going to sing my heart and lungs out all night. Haha!

Opening song for the second set - Pop Machine! At last, wish granted! As I've said earlier, this song is my current fave. The beat, the rhythm and the lyrics were perfect. Kailan ba ako magkakapera? Yeah!

I was surprised to hear them play Sabado. They released this song back in 2014, along with 1995 (the song, not the year). The limited edition CD was included in the Esquire Magazine September 2014 issue. Buti na lang, I got my own copy hehe.

Of course they also played their very first single (Ligaya) that captured the entire nation. Who would've thought that a tshirt, isaw, tansan and thesis (I don't even know thesis at that time, I was only in 3rd grade playing jackstone & patintero when I heard it on the radio) will make them legendary rock icons.

Buddy introduced Maestro Mel Villena who helped them arrange Lightyears - my ultimate favorite song from Eraserheads. No words needed. Just listen. The orchestra almost made me cry.

Aside from the orchestra and the back-up singers from AHEB cast, they were assisted by their auxiliary band members: Audry Dionisio, Mikey Amistoso and Jazz Nicolas.

Surprised again upon hearing the back-up singers sang the lines: In a hostile takeover bid... Whoa! Saturn Return! One of the songs in my wishlist. I wanna see a showdown from Ely and Raymund. But it got a lot better! Backed by the orchestra, the rap parts of Rayms were performed superbly by Arkin Magalona and Eon Buendia. I think after the 2nd set, I saw Diane Ventura (Eon's mom) and told her that Eon was impressive, then she shouted loud and proud, "Galing ni Eon!". The kids are alright.

Got another one in my wishlist - Tama Ka. At long last, been wanting to hear this live. Buddy didn't disappoint. "Minsan nagtatanong kung saan, kailan, paano nasimulan, ang katapusang mahirap takasan, pero 'wag na, ibato mo na lang sa ulan."

After With a smile, the band continued to play Insomya, perfect timing to pump up the crowd. We were on fire again! SWWWWW

Amazed and delighted when I heard the intro of Christmas Party. Another fave from the Fruitcake album. Did not expect this song, I was more convinced that Fruitcake will make the cut. Gary V sang the parts originally sang by the late Francis M.

The Sticker Happy piano was used as a backdrop during Spoliarium and made it more melancholic and gloomy. Remember The Final Set concert 13 years ago? That very same piano was set on fire. We can also feel the show's about to end soon.

They ended the second set with Magasin. Short break.

Encore. During Pare Ko, Raymund walks around the stage recording the event while drinking haha! "Lalo lang madadagdagan ang sakit ng ulo at bilbil sa tiyan" 🤣

Alapaap's intro was playing and the crowd sing along. But that was a mistake, that's why Ely's opening spiel doesn't add up haha! Minsan was the correct song, followed by Alapaap and the final song, Ang Huling El Bimbo. One of the greatest songs ever written, it was really doing well on its own, but when backed up by the orchestra, it went more magical and breathtaking. They ended the night with the magnificent fireworks display and loads of confetti shower.

Huling El Bimbo setlist:

1ST SET

1. Superproxy 2. Back2me 3. Waiting for the bus 4. Fine time 5. Kamasupra 6. Overdrive 7. Slo Mo 8. Torpedo 9. Huwag mo nang itanong

10. Paru-Parong Ningning 11. Walang Nagbago

12. Poorman's grave 13. Yoko 14. Fill her

2ND SET

15. Pop Machine 16. Sembreak 17. Sabado

18. Ligaya 19. Lightyears 20. Saturn Return

21. Maling Akala 22. Tama Ka 23. With a smile

24. Insomya 25. Christmas Party 26. Spoliarium

27. Magasin

3RD SET (ENCORE)

28. Pare Ko 29. Minsan 30. Alapaap

31. Ang Huling El Bimbo

Only three songs on my wishlist weren't included in their awesome setlist: Fruitcake, Maselang Bahaghari & Balikbayan Box. But still, one for the books! Thank you for the best birthday ever!!!

From the 8 year old kid in 1993 who listened to your songs & stick (still kick!) until the end. Amen? AMEN!!!

[girl-kendallroy]

1, 31, 33!!

thank you sid <333

1- comfort characters

ough… there are so many… kendall roy (i know..) kyle and stan from south park, ellie (i’m not going to lie she’s based on me basically. not only name and lesbianism but i have an uncle named joel) dina, and joel from the last of us, edward little from the terror, ivan and alyosha karamazov from the brothers karamazov all of the trailer park boys, elaine benes and george costanza, louis ironson, prior walter, and harper pitt from angels in america, sansa stark, lexi from euphoria. those are the main ones.. there are probably more though <3

31- music you find grounding?

ohh. this is going to turn into music recs in general because i am listening to music 24/7… i’m gonna list artists and best albums/songs that help me relax <3

george harrison my #1 fave ever… best calming/grounding albums: all things must pass, living in the material world, self titled, 33&1/3! also the songs long long long, here comes the sun, something from when the beatles were together…

i've been listening to a lot of leonard cohen lately.. he literally did have such a way with words it's actually insane... my fave albums are songs from a room, songs of leonard cohen, i'm your man, and songs of love and hate. hallelujah, anthem, take this waltz, dance me to the end of love are also some songs i find relaxing..

i've also gotten back into k.d. lang recently.. always been a fan because her voice and my mum has taste but she’s just soo. well. u know... anyway my fave albums of hers to put on and zone out to are shadowland (top five albums ever to me...), drag, ingenue, and hymns of the 49th parallel (makes me sooo homesick.) not to keep talking about it all the time but her hallelujah from the 2010 olympics is the best ever like. wow woman amazing also related.. case/lang/veirs is a gorgeous folk album... ok time for this dyke to shut up

simon and garfunkel. literally my gay uncles. love bridge over troubled water and parsley, sage, rosemary, and thyme, and sounds of silence. love mrs robinson and save the life of my child too.

that's probably it! or at least as far as im going to go in this post to save everyones dashes from an insanely long post... anyway.

33- last adventure you went on!

hm! two weeks ago i took the bus around my city by myself to go thrifting and stuff, actually the first time i took the bus since i came to university. another one was in november when i went to vancouver to present research all by myself and then ended up going all the way to nova scotia, again by myself. highly recommend traveling by yourself whether to thrift in your city or go back to the motherland because it is actually so healing <3

thanks again sid <3333

send me random asks!

[nordleuchten]

I was tagged by @echo-bleu (thank you!) for the words magic, men, marry, mince, mourn. There were only a few matches in my unpublished WIP’s but here is what I got. :-)

For the word marry:

"Ich habe für dich gekämpft Joséphine und du kannst das nicht verneinen! Ich habe während des Krieges jeden Tag um dich gekämpft! Um deine Freundschaft, dein Vertrauen, deine Geheimnisse - deine Liebe. Du warst diejenige die uns beiden nie eine Chance gegeben hat und mich stets von sich weggestoßen habe. Doch ich habe um dich gekämpft. Ich habe während meiner Ausnüchterung gegen Dämonen gekämpft, von denen ich vorher nicht einmal wusste, dass sie existierten. Nicht für mich habe ich das getan, sondern für dich! Ich kämpfe immer noch. Ich kämpfe gegen mich. Du stehst hier vor mir und alles was ich möchte, ist es dich zu beschützen und dich glücklich zu sehen! Wenn ich dich dafür also gehen lassen muss, dann werde ich das tun und dabei gegen mich selbst kämpfen! Ich werde gegen mich selbst kämpfen, solltest du einen anderen Mann heiraten und ihm gesunde Kinder schenken. Allein bei dem Gedanken, dass du im Kindebett sterben könntest, ich dich für immer verlieren werde und nicht einmal deine Beerdigung aus Gründen der Schicklichkeit besuchen kann, muss ich gegen mich kämpfen. Aber ich kämpfe gegen mich und nicht gegen dich!“ /// “I fought for you Joséphine and you can not deny it! I have fought every day during the war. I have fought for your friendship, your trust, your secrets – your love. You never gave the two of us a chance, always pushed me further away. But I fought! When I was becoming sober, I fought against demons I was not even aware of previously. I did not do that for me but for you! I am still fighting, still fighting against myself. You stand here in front of me and the only thing I want is to protect you and to see you safe and sound. If I have to let you go, for you to be happy, then so be it – I will let you go and continue to fight against myself. I will fight against myself should you merry another man and bear him healthy children. The thought alone that you could die in childbirth, that I would lose you forever and could not even attend your funeral for reasons of propriety is driving me insane. But I fight against myself and not against you!“

And for the word mourn:

Henry hatte das Gefühl zu ersticken, hatte das Gefühl zu verbrennen, hatte das Gefühl auf jede nur erdenkliche Art und Weise gleichzeitig zu sterben. Er wusste nicht wie lange seine Beine noch ihren Dienst erfüllen würden und deshalb ließ er sich auf der obersten Treppenstufte, auf der seine Frau eben noch gestanden hatte, niedersinken. Er hat das Gefühl, dass ein paar Treppenstufen ein passender Ort waren, um das Leben zu betrauern, das man nie geführt hat. Henry hätte zuhause in Virginia sein können, auf der Plantage seines Vaters mit zehn Kindern, die über die Wiesen tollten und einer Frau die …einfach nur perfekt und rein war. So hätte sein Leben aussehen sollen und dieses andere Leben nun zu führen fühlte sich plötzlich wie ein grausames Spiel der Natur an. /// Henry felt as if he was suffocating, he felt as if he was burning, he felt as if he was dying every single death imaginable all at once. He was not quite sure how long his legs would continue to support him and so he sat down on the stairs where his wife had stood, only a minute ago. A flight of stairs felt like a suitable place to mourn the life he would never know. Henry could have been home at his father’s plantation in Virginia with his ten children playing in the gardens and a wife that … was simply perfect and pure. This was how it should have been and, in such moments, his own life felt like a sick and twisted game.

I honestly have completely lost track of all the people that have already participated so I am tagging everybody who liked to join in the fun with the words brother, water, moon, star(s).

[hvbris]

@normallyxstranger​ / semi-plotted starter for Lang Maddox

“Hey Lang,” said Eve as she walked into the living room, throwing her jacket on the couch. Noah was not far behind, and he soon sat down, feet on the coffee table. The twins were always moody, whenever they returned form visiting their dad at the Baltimore Hospital for the Criminally Insane. 

“Fucking bus ride home took forever,” she sighed, sitting next to her brother. 

Noah was always less talkative than his sister, but on visiting days, he was practically mute. He simply nodded with a shrug, as if to agree with Eve’s comment. 

“All this to go yell at our dad for 45 minutes, fucking bullshit.”

And yet, they went every two weeks, like clockwork. And they would keep doing it, too. No matter how long the bus ride. Noah finally seemed to emerge from his silent limbo as he stretched and asked Lang:

“How was your day?”

It wasn’t like the twins wanted to talk about their day. Not in details, at least. And what was there to say, anyway? Another family fight. At least, the Gideons were consistent. 

[taiishii]

❝     In fact, up to this time, in his heart, Chang Geng was still that gentle and simple young man. Perhaps he was more brilliant than others, but he would never look down on people because of his talents. Perhaps he had a little bit of petty temperament, but he did not get angry easily. Even if it happened, it happened in a proper manner, only to express to the offender that ‘I’m angry’. The person would at most only feel like they were being scratched lightly by a dear little animal, only leaving a little white mark and not breaking the skin. Could make one love him down to the bones.    ❞

A private + extremely selective roleplay account for Chang Geng from PRIEST's Sha Po Lang / Stars of Chaos. 21+ over only. Exploring drama, political intrigue, tactician types, young and enduring love, and lots of love for ancient chinese history.

ABOUT:

Chang Geng is named after the evening Venus, sometimes called Lucifer, which is believed to be an unfortunate star.

Chang Geng is the son of the previous emperor Yuan He of Great Liang and a captive northern tribe princess. Hidden away by his aunt, he grew up in a faraway village watching as steam powered ships and airships took over the skies. His aunt was not kind despite stealing him away, and he was often subjected to abuse both physically and psychologically that when he was a child he tried to run away multiple times. 

Saved from wolves on the outskirts one winter when he attempted to run away, one of his saviors was a young man named Gu Yun and his friend Shen Yi, he dubbed this man ‘Yifu’ out of gratitude and cared for him in his half-blind and half-deaf state for a few years. When it’s revealed that Gu Yun is the Grand Marshal of the Great Liang Empire who has come to protect Chang Geng, he takes him to the capital to claim his royal title as the Emperor’s fourth son, Li Min later known by the title of Yan Wang.

Described as having an appearance like jade, his features are sharp, which could make him seem unapproachable but he has an air of calmness around him that mellows it out, even making him look sweet when he smiles.

Thoughtful and brilliant, Chang Geng works constantly to solve national crises of Great Liang. With his heart firmly planted in seeing his country prosper without war, he assists in new banking, creating railways, and even pushing invasions from the West from their borders. But under the high functioning exterior, he fights to suppress a violent curse called the Bone of Impurity placed upon him by his aunt in retribution for his father’s crimes, who over time during his childhood had slowly poisoned him. 

The curse itself has the long-term effect of being unable to differentiate between reality and dreams, causing the afflicted to go insane, bringing violence and destruction anywhere they go. In multiple instances, when emotions were high, Chang Geng would begin to bleed from his eyes and seemed to grow two sets of red pupils in his agitated state.

In order to control this he followed a monk named Liao Ran for a great portion of his teenage years who taught him stoicism to contain his emotions, and in his adulthood learned from a master healer and doctor named Chen Qing Xu who later would find a ritualistic cure to help rid him of the Bone Impurity.

His love for his country and the people, coupled with his decisiveness on when to be kind and when to be ruthless led to his ascension after the death of his brother emperor Li Feng and made him the best Emperor Tai Shi that Great Liang has had in 3 generations.

RULES:

25+ // genderfluid // mst . due to my demanding schedule i am low activity and appear here and there like a cryptid . i require patience and understanding from my partners please!

i. i am not associated with the author or fandom . nothing here is owned by me unless stated otherwise . that being said my interpretation is my own and will largely be divergent, though i will take pieces from canon & incorporate it with chinese mythos/culture .

ii. i have a very demanding schedule outside of rp . i work a lot & game like a second job . so please understand that my replies may be very slow some days & quick others . i do not require a post length , so please do not expect one from me !

iii. i have d*scord available upon request & i am always down for plotting . if you need clarification on my interpretation or on a thread feel free to DM me too , i prommy i don't bite! that being said , i am here for long-term rp partners/friends and only rp with people who are 21+ . minors please do not follow .

iv. i don't do drama . don't involve me in any shape or form with yours , i do not come here for online squabbles . it will be a quick unfollow from me if that is all you post about . i will however reblog callouts on predators & known manipulators that have cause genuine harm to the rpc if it pops up .

v. while there may be mature or potentially triggering content and spoilers on here , i do not ever tolerate pedophilia , incest , racism , ableism , fetishization & homophobia/trnsphobia to any member of the lgbtq community . if i post triggering or nsfw content , i will post a tw after the trigger or nsfw in the tags . i don't do fancy tags as this is a safe space .

vi. multis please specify which muse you want dan feng to interact with if you like any starters or send me an ask . i am really chill about establishing relationships + shipping but know that i reserve the right to turn you down at any point if it's not my jimjam .

overall , please be kind to each other . we're here for a good time , not a long time .

[therealvinelle]

Ok I'm embarrassed to admit this, but I'm just now copying your Norwegian Bella AU into a text translator, and if you don't already have 50 people in your inbox demanding a translation then shame on ALL OF US because this is glorious! And while Google Translate does have a certain charm (it translated "piper hun ut" as "she beeps") I'm curious to see how you'd put it in English.

Troquantary is referring to this post. In which Bella doesn't speak English.

Fun fact, you're the only one who's gone into my inbox to request this. I was so sad, had the translation half-written and everything, but I was too proud to beg. So thank you, Troquantary, for popping this ask.

As for the dictionary fuckups, sounds about right. I made a few typos, too, that made Google Translate suffer even more. (Such as managing to mix up "henne" (her) and "hendene" (hands), resulting in Aro patting Bella instead of clapping his hands. Poor Google.)

Also, there are a few cultural references and language things that would be lost in the translation, in an attempt to keep them I included notes clarifying things.

Some things, like Aro and Carlisle's very old man way of speaking, are easier said than done to translate, you'll have to bear with me there.

Additional notes are that I added a few things to this version, many of them because translating is hard, but a few because while translating I thought "oh you know what would be much funnier-" and then wrote that.

Alright, without further ado:

When Renée left Charlie she did not go to Florida, she went to Oslo. And she went all in to make her daughter a true Norwegian, hiring Norwegian nannies and making sure never to speak English around the child. Since transatlantic flights are expensive, little Bella Swan rarely got to visit her father, and as such she never did learn what should have been her native language.

She quickly forgot what English she did have in favor of Norwegian, with the exception of words like “Yes”, “No”, and “I’m Bella”.

The few trips she took to visit her father were all the more awkward than in canon since she couldn’t play with the Black kids. Let not the blame fall upon Charlie: he took Norwegian classes and speaks conversational Norwegian. He can’t speak to Renée, because her Norwenglish is incomprehensible even to Norwegians, but he can communicate with Bella.

Not that he’s had a lot of chances to do so.

Bella makes it to seventeen years old, she’s in second grade at Handels* and is a major outsider among the preps there, and then Renée marries a handsome skier**. Together they shall travel the continent all winter to participate in as many skiing races as they can, and in the summer they’ll take gigs at Hurtigruta to see the coast.

*“Handels” is the nickname for an Oslo high school infamous for its pupils being rich and beautiful blonds who are going to be CEOs when they grow up.

**Skiing as a sport is huge in Norway

***Hurtigruta is a famous ferry that travels across the Norwegian West coast

Bella, who sucks at skiing and is too young to work at Hurtigruten, takes the hint.

With dread in her stomach and dictionary in hand she goes to her father in America.

Where she doesn’t speak the language.

Faen.

Charlie gives her a car, and I wish this meta was set in the present because I could have joked about electric cars and the automat only driver’s license*, but Twilight is set in 2005 so I can’t. The car part proceeds without drama.

*An increasing number of Norwegian youth take the driver’s license for automatic cars only, and we’re the country in the world with the highest percentage of electric car purchases.

School is worse than in canon, because she is now a thousand times more sensational than if she was merely the new student. She is from another country! All of Forks keels over with excitement.

To make matters even worse, our girl doesn’t understand a word of what people are saying.

She is too awkward to let them know she doesn’t know English. It’d become a thing, and they might think she’s dumb. To be fair, it’s not good that she’s been through primary, secondary, and now a year and a half of high school and still sucks at English.

So she nods, smiles, mumbles “Hi, I’m Bella” to the new faces, and blushes heavily when anybody says anything.

People assume she’s shy. That’s a bit boring, but oh well.

She has her biology class with the redhead hottie she noticed during lunch. She watched him and his family, they were fascinatingly pretty, but she doesn’t know anything more about them. Sure would have been great if she could have asked the tiny girl (was it Jess?) about them.

Biology proceeds as in canon - Edward badly wants to eat the delicious girl, but fortunately doesn’t.

She runs into him in the office when he tries to switch to another biology lesson, but she has no idea what he’s saying so she only has the suspicion that this somehow concerns her. Which is still uncomfortable, but Bella is probably the problem here. The hottie surely can’t be.

He’s missing from school for a week, Bella finds that weird.

He returns, and to her great horror he starts talking to her.

“Hello”, he says.

Bella dies inside. He’s too handsome!

"I'm Edward Cullen," he continues, and ok, she got that. The hottie is called Edward, that’s good to know. She’s not sure she caught that last name, though, Köln?

He says something else, it’s gibberish to Bella even though she’s concentrating, and at the end there he says “Bella Swan”.

She gulps.

"I'm Bella Swan," she confirms and nods. That should be correct. God, she hopes it’s correct.

He smiles a crooked, boyish smile. She’s awed. She didn’t think it was possible to be so beautiful.

He says something else.

Bella didn’t catch it.

She blushes even harder, she hasn’t been more embarrassed in her life. Here he is, the most handsome guy in all the world, and she has nothing to say to him. Literally, they don’t speak the same language.

She should tell him.

It’s one thing to chicken out of telling the town she doesn’t speak English, but there’s something different about Edward Cullen. He deserves the truth.

But...

He’s the most beautiful person she has seen in her life. He is American, too, so the odds of him knowing Norwegian are microscopical. If he finds out she doesn’t understand a word he says he’ll stop talking to her, and selfish as she is she doesn’t want that.

So with a slightly guilty conscience (but not enough to fess up) she contributes to the conversation with enough words and smiles to pull through. "Yes", "No", "Thank you", and "That's nice".

He is surprised by several of these answers, but instead of giving her odd looks and losing interest he grows more invested in the conversation.

Class ends.

The next day the near accident happens, and he saves her. She is stunned - dear god, did he just pick up a whole car? After teleporting across the parking lot..?

Soon she’s in the ER, and more than a little bit stressed about that fact since she knows the Americans have a terrible healthcare system.

She hopes Charlie has an insurance.

An insanely beautiful man walks into the ER, and Bella is shocked. He is just as handsome as Edward and Edward’s lunch friends!

He introduces himself as Carlisle Cullen, and Bella can only assume this is someone’s older brother. Possibly related to the blonde girl.

He smiles at her, says something, and she answers, "I'm Bella Swan."

He frowns.

That must have been the wrong answer, then.

His hands return to investigating her scalp, and to her great surprise he switches to perfect Norwegian, "kjenner De* noe ubehag når jeg holder her?" Do you feel any discomfort when I touch here?

*De is the Norwegian polite pronoun for “you”. Du = thou = the French tu, and De = you = the French vous. These polite pronouns went out of use in the 1980’s, save for when addressing royal persons, and would be considered antiquated in 2005.

He hurries to add, "Norsk lærte jeg i... fjor sommer. Det var et nettkurs." I learned Norwegian… last year. Online class.

"Hvilket da?" Which one? Bella asks, because Charlie needs to hear about this. The doctor has beautiful, if slightly outdated, pronunciation.

The doctor’s smile turns uncertain. She gets the feeling there’s something he doesn’t want to say. "Husker ikke," I don’t remember, sier han etter en litt vel lang pause.

That’s a shame. And weird.

"De hadde hellet med Dem i dag, som ikke ble truffet av den bilen." You were lucky today, not getting hit by that car. he then says, noticeably changing the subject.

"Det var ikke hell, det var Edward," It wasn’t luck, it was Edward, she replies sharply.

The doctor definitely looks uncomfortable.

She continues, "Han krysset skolegården på et blunk, og plukket opp hele bilen. Jeg så det," He crossed the schoolyard in a moment, and picked up the whole car. I saw it,

The doctor laughs. "Om han kunne det hadde nok gymkarakteren hans vært meget bedre. Nei, frøken Swan*, jeg beklager å si at det høres ut som at De er litt omtåket. Det er helt normalt ved hjernerystelse." If he could do that, his PE grade would be a lot better. No, Miss Swan, I’m sorry to say you seem confused. That’s normal with concussions.

*Addressing a young woman as “frøken” is even more outdated than using polite pronouns.

Why does Bella get the feeling he’s lying?

She’s discharged.

We’ll jump ahead to her trip to La Push - that trip uneventful, since Jacob knows she doesn’t speak English. They stick their hands in their pockets and stare at the sea.

The next day she’s shanghaied to Port Angeles, because apparently she said “Yes” at the wrong time when talking to Jessica (Turns out Jess’s name was Jessica!) and accidentally said yes to a day trip to Port Angeles.

Like in canon she wanders away from the others, and as in canon she is nearly gang raped. And again as in canon she is saved at the last moment by Edward.

He buys her dinner, and she can’t believe her own luck- and misfortune. A date with the most handsome guy on the planet (hence the luck) and she can’t say a word to him (hence the misfortune)!

He says things to her, lends her his jacket, and really this is it for Bella, she’s peaked, life can’t get better than this.

(That’s a lie, it would be better if she spoke English.)

He’s so amazing.

She’s gotten pretty good at navigating conversations with him, so she nods and aha’s her way through.

In his car on the way home the tone takes a more serious turn.

He asks her about something, and it’s a serious question, that much she’s gathered. She answers in the confirmative.

He is silent.

Did she say anything wrong?

(Edward, on his end, just asked if she knows what he is. She said yes, so calmly, not even a trace of fear in her.)

A few days later he takes her out on a walk in the woods.

He shows her a meadow in the woods, and when he steps into it he lights up in the sunlight.

Bella is in shock.

She knew there was something different about him, but- holy cow. This guy isn’t human.

Is she dating a god?

She stumbles into the clearing after him, and they spend a day together where he says things, and she can barely hear any of it (nevermind understand it) because she’s so distracted by how pretty he is.

The next day he takes her to a house in the middle of nowhere. She doesn’t want to guess that this can be where he lives. Surely gods don’t live in houses?

He shows her inside the house, and introduces her for Dr. Cullen and a lady with a name she doesn’t catch.

Bit weird that these two are acting like a couple of parents, they’re far too young and divine for that.

Edward shows her around in an old-fashioned office, and she doesn’t know what to make of i when she sees a painting of Carlisle. Edward launches into a long story when he sees her watching it, unfortunately she doesn’t catch any dates or artist names. At one point she heard the word “suicide”, though, and that’s not good.

She doesn’t get much out of the story.

The baseball game doesn’t happen because Bella didn’t pick up on what Edward wanted and didn’t realize she was being invited to a thing. They spend the afternoon watching a movie instead.

The relationship continues, impeded slightly by communication problems, but she’s mostly able to cover those up.

Until her birthday comes around.

She gets a papercut.

Jasper lunges at her. Edward throws her into a glass table, and then everyone is leaving.

Carlisle is kind enough to switch to Norwegian when he’s stitching up her arm, perhaps remembering the last time she was his patient. "Jasper har ikke vært på dietten vår så veldig lenge." Jasper hasn’t been on our diet for very long.

"Diett?"she asks. She’s never seen Edward eat anything. She wasn’t clear on what the Cullens ate, honestly she thought they were above such things. She was thinking maybe photosynthesis. The knowledge that they apparently eat food astounds her, but diets?

"Dyreblod istedenfor menneskeblod," Animal blood in stead of human blood, Carlisle clarifies.

Whachasay?

Carlisle gives a slight smile. “Jaspers liv som vampyr fikk en brutal start." Jasper’s life as a vampire got off to a brutal start.

...

Vampire?!

Bella’s missed something here.

Oh dear lord, oh fy faen, she has missed something.

“Åja”, uh huh, is all she can say, and suddenly she’s very aware of the fact that she’s sitting there with a bleeding arm.

And Carlisle.

Who is a vampire.

Over the course of the following conversation Bella makes a host of discoveries.

Edward has been a vampire this whole time, and he’s a telepathic vampire. Whether Bella should be a vampire too or not has been a matter of hot debate, but due to religious reasons Edward doesn’t want that.

Carlisle also brings up how Edward died of the Spanish flu.

"Jeg var under den oppfatning at Edward fortalte deg bakhistorien min?" I was under the impression Edward told you my back story? Carlisle asks at one point, and Bella just has to ask very nicely if he’d be so kind as to repeat it.

Turns out the guy is nearly four hundred years old.

Jaha.

Jahahaha jaa ha.

That’s… a lot.

She wanders out of the house in shock, and hardly notices Edward’s strange behavior over the next couple of days.

One day he picks her up at school, and takes her behind the house.

That works out.

He’s a vampire, but he never hurt her. He is endlessly beautiful, perhaps easier to love now that she knows he’s not a god. He’s her Edward, and that’s suddenly easier now that she knows.

They can still be together.

But now that she knows this about him, it’s about time he knows something about her as well.

It’s time to finally be honest with him.

So when he opens his mouth, she opens her mouth as well, but she doesn’t get any further than to “Edward-” before he launches into a monologue.

She’ll have to wait until he’s done before saying her piece. It’s a bit embarrassing, but it doesn’t seem like he intends to stop talking anyway.

And what he’s saying seems to be serious, so it’s probably best to let him finish.

Edward concludes his monologue by kissing her forehead. Then he disappears.

Where did he go?

A big unsure, Bella goes back to the house. She’ll just have to wait until he gets back.

She doesn’t know what to think when Charlie returns from work and tells her the Cullens have all left.

Oh, god.

Edward must have found out she doesn’t speak English.

She made a mockery of him.

He has every right to leave.

Knowing this doesn’t make it any easier to live with.

Bella sinks into a depression.

The hallucinations begin, as in canon, though Hallusinward speaks Norwegian. Thank god for small mercies.

The friendship with Jacob (dictionary in hand) blooms, as someone has to help her see those hallucinations.

The cliff diving happens, and Alice shows up. Bella’s not sure what this is about, but she has gotten good enough at English to know that something bad happened, and Alice wants them to do something.

She’s a bit surprised to find herself on a plane to Italy, though.

Alice tells her to “Run to Edward” and ok, she got that, actually.

So she saves Edward.

After that she’s taken into the sewer, which turns out to house dozens of vampires.

Bella, Edward, and Alice are received in some kind of hall, where an unusual vampire has quite a bit to say. She understands some of what he’s saying, at least the part about “la tua cantante”. She knows a bit about Italian, see, so she knows that he’s talking about a song now.

She wishes she knew the context.

At one point he takes her hand, and appears fascinated by it. She wonders if he’s a palmreader. Not very vampirey, but what does she know.

He asks her a question.

"Yes," she says.

Saying yes has gotten her this far, after all.

But when he lights up and claps his hands together, and Edward and Alice stare at her in shock and betrayal, she knows she must have said the wrong thing.

The two are dismissed from the room before Bella can do or say anything, she’s just listening to Edward make a racket outside in the hallway.

Not good.

The unusual vampire brings her further down in his sewer palace to a basement, and she is given comfortable clothes to wear.

This is getting terrifying.

The vampire leans towards her - and she chickens out.

"Jeg snakker ikke engelsk!" she squeaks. "Non habla ingles!" I don’t speak English.

Han stanser, og ser forvirret ut. "Que- Hva behager*?" I beg your pardon? spør han etter et øyeblikk.

*A very formal, and slightly outdated (you can use it, but people will think you’re putting on airs. And they will be right) way of saying “excuse me?”

Sobbing, Bella tells him the whole story, from how she didn’t want to be the weird kid in school to how she’s now somehow in Italy without knowing why nor what she just agreed to.

When she’s done the vampire starts laughing.

"Dette forklarer jo en hel del," This explains quite a bit, ler han. "Men, kjære Bella, jeg er redd det ikke endrer noe." But, my dear Bella, I’m afraid it changes nothing.

He tells her that she has agreed to serve him and his army of undead warriors into eternity.

Well fuck.

"Du skal få slippe det, når du ikke visste hva du samtykket til - men skjebnen din forblir den samme. Loven er loven." You’re released from that promise, as you didn’t know what you agreed to - but your fate remains the same. The law is the law.

After a moment of silence, during which she looks terrified, he hurries to add, "Vi har en lov. Du må bli en av oss." We have a law. You must become one of us.

A law that Bella Swan has to become a vampire?

People are finally speaking Norwegian, and Bella is still lost. And it’s too embarrassing to keep pestering this poor, polite man with questions.

So she nods.

He gives her a glittering smile, and bites her.

When she wakes, Aro offers her an English course. A language course that, naturally, leads to her staying in Volterra. Why not learn a few more languages while we’re at it, dearest Bella?

Some time later Edward breaks into Volterra to save his Rapunzel, only to barely recognize her now that she’s a vampire who says things. Lots of things, she talks all the time now. WHAT DID ARO DO TO HER.

Too mortified to admit that she never spoke English, Bella claims she’s been brainwashed.

Aro is having too much fun to correct her, and the whole sad affair sets off a regrettable flood of rumors.

[dangermousie]

Mousie’s absolutely subjective, very biased Top 10 web novels list

Please note that this is hardly aiming to be objective, if one can even be properly objective about a work of fiction. It is 110% based on my preferences, which means this list is heavy on the angst and has nothing set in the modern day. It is also heavily danmei-centric, even though I read way more het romance than danmei, because for whatever reason, most of the danmei I’ve read has been insanely good.

10. Return of the Swallow - one of the two non-danmeis on this list. Smart and nuanced and with a large cast of characters. Our heroine is a long-lost daughter of the family that is brought back in and has to cope with familial struggles, crazy royals, court intrigue, invasion et al. It’s SO GOOD! There is romance with the sexy smart enemy general but honestly, it’s the heroine that is the main selling point for me.

9. Transmigrator Meets Reincarnator - the only other non-danmei novel on this list, this was my very first web novel and what drew me into this insanity. This is just a ton of fun, probably the lightest novel on this list, not an ounce of angst to be found. But it’s hilarious and features competent heroine and tsundere hero and I will always love it for opening a new world to me. Anyway, our heroine transmigrates into the novel as the female lead. Unlike the original lead though she doesn’t want to seek adventures and angst - she just wants to comfortably live with the wealthy, nice husband heroine has. Alas, said husband is no longer nice since he has previously lived this story where he was betrayed by FL and then transmigrated/reincarnated into the past. Oh well, the heroine opens up businesses and makes friends. And eventually, her husband realizes his wife is way different this time around. This actually doesn’t have much romance, not until close to the end, but this is so fun I don’t care.

8. Lord Seventh - I am only partway through this so far, but it’s already on the list because it’s smart and somehow intense AND laid-back (not sure how this works, but it does) and is honestly just a really really solid and smart period novel, with the OTP a cherry on top of a narrative sundae. Plus, I love the concept of MC deciding he is not going for his supposedly fated love - he’s tried for six lifetimes, always with disaster, and he’s just plain done and tired. When he opens his life in his seventh reincarnation and sees the person he would have given up the world for, he genuinely feels nothing at all. (Spoiler - his OTP is actually a barbarian shaman this time around, thank you Lord!)

7. Grandmaster of Demonic Cultivation (MDZS) - oh come on, how are you even on this tumblr if you don’t know MDZS/The Untamed? This was my very first danmei and it’s so much fun! I love everything about it - the unreliable narrator, the looping structure, the main OTP, Wei Wuxian’s laidback, traumatized insouciance, everything. Anyway, the plot in the event you somehow transported here from 2005 is that the Grandmaster of Demonic Cultivation, Wei Wuxian, was defeated by the righteous sects over a decade ago and fell of a cliff to his death. Only now that same Wei Wuxian opens his eyes in another body and everything that was supposed to stay in the past starts again.

6. Heaven Official’s Blessing (TGCF) - people either love its meandering narrative, picaresque structure and cast of thousands, or find it a detriment compared to much more compact MDZS. I love it even more than MDZS for those very qualities. It does have a rock-solid, darling OTP, but what really elevates it to me are the MXTX trademark combo of snarky/light tone hiding a ton of trauma underneath, the insanely intricate world-building, and what it has to say about the nature of grace and goodness. Xie Lian is one of my top 5 web novel characters and probably in top 10 from anywhere. Oh, and while MXTX’s stuff is not as angsty for me as Meatbun’s or even Priest’s, there are always exceptions, and there is one chapter in this novel that pretty much broke me and sometimes I still flashback to it and feel unwell.

Anyway, what is it about? There is a commotion in the heavenly realm - Xie Lian, the Crown Prince of a long-destroyed kingdom, has ascended to Godhood. That in itself is not so exciting. However for Xie Lian this is the third time (!!!!) as he’s ascended and lost his godhood twice prior. And now, the biggest joke of the divine realm is back, throwing the heavenly realm into chaos. And elsewhere, Hua Cheng, one of the four most powerful demons of that Universe, sits up and takes notice.

5. Golden Stage - my perfect comfort novel. Probably the least angsty of any danmei novel on this list (which still means plenty angsty :P) It also has a dedicated, smart OTP that is an OTP for the bulk of the book - I think you will notice that in most of the novels in this list, I go for “OTP against the world” trope - I can’t stand love triangles and the same. Anyway, Fu Shen, is a famous general whose fame is making the emperor antsy. When he gets injured and can’t walk any more, the emperor gladly recalls him and marries him off to his most faithful court lackey, the head of sort of secret police, Yan Xiaohan. The emperor intends it both as a check on the general and a general spite move since the two men always clash in court whenever they meet. But not all is at is seems. They used to be friends a long time ago, had a falling out, and one of the loveliest parts of the novel is them finding their way to each other, but there is also finding the middle path between their two very different philosophies and ways of being, not to mention solving a conspiracy or dozen, and putting a new dynasty on the throne, among other things. It always makes me think, a little, of “if Mei Changsu x Jingyan were canon.”

4. Sha Po Lang - if you like a lot of fantasy politics and world-building and steampunk with your novels, this one is for you. This one is VERY plot-heavy with smart, dedicated characters and a deconstruction of many traditional virtues - our protagonist Chang Geng, a long-lost son of the Emperor, is someone who wants to modernize the country but also take down the current emperor his brother for progress’ sake and the person he’s in love with is the general who saved him when he was a kid who is nominally his foster father. Anyway, the romance is mainly a garnish in this one, not even a big side dish, but the relationship between two smart, dedicated, deadly individuals with very different concepts of duty is fascinating long before it turns romantic. And if you like angst, while overall it’s not as angsty as e.g., Meatbun stuff, Chang Geng’s childhood is the stuff of nightmares and probably freaks me out more than anything else in any novel on this list, 2ha included.

3. To Rule In a Turbulent World (LSWW) - gay Minglan. No seriously. This is how I think of it. it’s a slice of life period novel with fascinating characters and setting that happens to have a gay OTP, not a romance in a period setting per se and I always prefer stories where the romance is not the only thing that is going on. It’s meticulously written and smart and deals with character development and somehow makes daily minutia fascinating. Our protagonist, You Miao, is the son of a fabulously wealthy merchant, sent to the capital to make connections and study. As the story starts, he sees his friend’s servants beating someone to death, feels bad, and buys him because, as we discover gradually and organically, You Miao may be wealthy and occasionally immature but he is a genuinely good person. The person he buys is a barbarian from beyond the wall, named Li Zhifeng. It’s touch and go if the man will survive but eventually he does and You Miao, who by then has to return home, gives him his papers and lets him go. However, LZF decides to stick with You Miao instead, both out of sense of debt for YM saving his life and because he genuinely likes him (and yet, there is no instalove on either of their parts, their bodies have fun a lot quicker than their souls.) Anyway, the two take up farming, get involved in the imperial exams and it’s the life of prosperity and peace, until an invasion happens and things go rapidly to hell. This is so nuanced, so smart (smart people in this actually ARE!) and has secondary characters who are just as complex as the mains (for example, I ended up adoring YM’s friend, the one who starts the plot by almost beating LZF to death for no reason) because the novel never forgets that few people are all villain. There is a lovely character arc or two - watching YM grow up and LZF thaw - there is the fact that You Miao is a unicorn in web novels being laid back and calm. This whole thing is a masterpiece.

2. Stains of Filth (Yuwu) - want the emotional hit of 2ha but want to read something half its length? Well, the author of 2ha is here to eviscerate you in a shorter amount of time. This has the beautiful world-building, plot twists that all make sense and, at the center of it all, an intense and all-consuming and gloriously painful relationship between two generals - one aristocratic loner Mo Xi, and the other gregarious former slave general Gu Mang. Once they were best friends and lovers, but when the novel starts, Gu Mang has long turned traitor and went to serve the enemy kingdom and has now been returned and Mo Xi, who now commands the remnants of his slave army, has to cope with the fact that he has never been able to get over the man who stabbed him through the heart. Literally. This novel has a gorgeously looping structure, with flashbacks interwoven into present storyline. There is so much love and longing and sacrifice in this that I am tearing up a bit just thinking of it. If you don’t love Mo Xi and Gu Mang, separately and together, by the end of it, you have no soul.

1. The Dumb Husky and His White Cat Shizun (2ha/erha) - if you’ve been following my tumblr for more than a hot second, you know my obsession with this novel. Honestly, even if I were to make a list of my top 10 novels of any kind, not just webnovels, this would be on the list. It has everything I want - a complicated, intricate plot with an insane amount of plot twists, all of which are both unexpected and make total sense, a rich and large cast of characters, a truly epic OTP that makes me bawl, emotional intensity that sometimes maxes even me out and so much character nuance and growth. Also, Moran is my favorite web novel character ever, hands down.

Anyway, the plot (or at least the way it first appears) is that the evil emperor of the cultivation world, Taxian Jun, kills himself at 32 and wakes up in the body of his 16 year old self, birth name Moran. Excited to get a redo, Moran wants to save his supposed true love Shimei, whose death the last go-around pushed him towards evil. He also wants to avoid entanglement with Chu Wanning, his shizun and sworn enemy in past life. And that’s all you are best off knowing, trust me. The only hint I am going to give is oooh boy the mother of all unreliable narrators has arrived!

The novel starts light and funny on boil the frog principle - if someone told me I would be full bawling multiple times with this novel, I’d have thought they were insane, but i swear my eyes hurt by the end of it. I started out being amused and/or disliking the mains and by the end I would die for either of them.

[daddysfangirls-marvel]

Material: Series

Series:

* Smut / Smutish

Polyamorous series: ( ongoing) Three people fall in love with each other in a time when loving more than one person was looked down upon. But even in a time when it’s not allowed they still share love and memories. Here are their polyamorous memories

First Kiss |  *First Touch | *Moving in  | *The day they left for war | Found you | *The day Howard Stark Found out  | *Big Change | The train | The plane | Alone | Unfortunate Sequences of events | I know her  | The restaurant  pt1 | The restaurant pt 2 | *It’s me | You can keep her | He’s okay with that | Mama loves me | Kissing Captain | Kissing Winter | Healing | *Hurt | *We’ll wait | Memories | Prude | *Whore |  Put in her place  |  The day Stark Jr. Found out |  Now You Know  |  Nursing  |  *Like a virgin  |  *Morning After  |  The Catacombs | Off with Her head |  Grieving the insane |  Let me make it up to you* |  Punishment*  | Spiderling pt1  |  Spiderling pt2  |  Twentieth-century love  |  The new we can imagine  |  Connection |  Please, Marry me  |  Walk me  |  Stand with me  |  Final touches  |  I do |  HoneyMoon  |  A moment in paradise |  Pictures from Paradise  | The Fever  | The Bad days | Let’s talk about it | *Practice makes perfect pt1 | *Practice makes perfect pt2 | Seed | Unknown Stolen | unfulfilled duties | Talking Emotions | Next Step | Holy shit!! | First steps to hope | She’s awake | Nicknames | The Mother and The father | The Boy | The Name Game | Talking | Not Ready | No Boys 

*Bonus*

Peggy Carter

*Let’s play a game

Howard Stark’s Video - ongoing

The Rain

Bucky finds a child in the rain. After noticing a few weird things about her he decides it’s best if she stays with him. Now they’re on the run. [complete]

Part 1  | Part 2  | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 |  Part 6  | Part 7   | Part 8   | Part 9  | Part 10 | Part 11 | Part 12 | Part 13 | Part 14

The Snow

Sequel to ‘The Rain’. The reader meets Thor, Bruce, and Loki. She accidentally tags along in their adventures. Along the way, she helps Loki. [ Loki x child! fem! reader] ( Complete)

Part 1 | Part 6 | Part 11 | Part 16 | Part 21

Part 2 | Part 7 | Part 12 | Part 17 | Part 22

Part 3 | Part 8 | Part 13 | Part 18

Part 4 | Part 9 | Part 14 | part 19

Part 5 | Part 10 | Part 15 | Part 20

The Storm series: Trilogy/ third to The Snow. “All life has water,” Someone said that to her once she didn’t understand how significant those words were until have the universe was threatened. The reader has been known to help everyone but this time she can’t help anyone. (Complete)

1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12

The Eye

1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | (Hiatus)

Summary: After the Snap (Y/n) spends the next five years trying to put herself back together again along with everyone else. Just as she’s on the edge of finding or giving up hope for this world of the leftovers Scott Langs shows up with a plan to bring back what was once lost.

Lost Love: [ on Going]Okay what if some write about the Winter Soldier instead of Bucky. Maybe read is forced to work hydra and she gets him to trust her and he protects her and she’s the only one who can calm him down and then he goes back to Bucky and doesn’t remember her and like has to fall in love with her all over again. ( Bucky Barnes/ Winter Soldier x fem! reader)

1 |  2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7  | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13| 14 | 15 | 16 | 17 |18 | 19 | 20 | 21| 22 | 23| 24 | 25 | 26| 27 | 28 |Ongoing

Black White & Gray:( Loki x reader )reader  is a prisoner in a high-security prison in the Stark Tower, and she is incredibly dangerous, and Loki is being brought in by the Avengers and he wonders why she is in there, they escape together and travel the Galaxy and then just stop on a planet and like start a new life but then Thor finds them and calls them to help on Earth and everyone sees how good they are afterward and just lets them start a secret family Europe or something

1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 - Complete

70 years: Bucky Barnes x reader, Steve Rodgers x (sister) reader. After Bucky and Steve fail to come home after ww2 y/n is driven crazy from the hatred she feels from being abandoned by her brother and left alone in the world she becomes an Assassin to kill those who ruined her life. 70 years later the avengers are sent to find an Assassin that has been killing for the last several decades only for Steve and Bucky to be horrified by who it is. (Codename reaper) Complete

Grief | Pain | Alone | Happiness| A thousand years of Happiness

Goth Boss: Tony stark x daughter goth reader. The avengers find out that Tony has a secret teenage daughter and make tony ask her to visit. But when they meet her the avengers find out why she was kept secret. (tony has a strained relationship with y/n as she grew up without him and he kept her secret) - Ongoing

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6

[usernamesarebitches]

Okay now that all 3 episodes of Nightmare Time has aired, I just have to say, Nick Lang and his brother are so incredibly creative and talented. I mean, who could just think of these things and create episodes and stories within a few weeks? Incredible.

And Jeff Blim's music and lyrics? Unbeatable.

It's insane how talented and credible all of Starkid is. Their stories and songs and acting are always so emotional and powerful and I am just amazed. These episodes were crazy and honestly fucked my mind up pretty good but they're just so crazy.

I think my favorite story was The Witch in the Web. So creative and intense.

Overall, amazing. I love Starkid.

[it-begins-with-rain]

Chinese Language TV Recommendations

For my Korean TV Recommendations, click here.

*Contains both Mainland-Chinese and Taiwanese programs.

** Updated 05/23/21 with “Miss The Dragon” & “Word of Honor”

A Love So Beautiful

Can the pure love of 17-year-olds endure through all the challenges of college and adulthood?

Chen Xiao Xi and Jiang Chen are high school friends and neighbors who grew up together. Xiao Xi is happy-go-lucky and doesn’t like to study much but she has a talent for drawing. Jiang Chen is popular for his good looks and high grades, but is cold and indifferent to other people.

Their friends include swimmer Wu Bo Song, who will do anything for XiaoXi, the dorky and over-confident gamer Lu Yang, and Lin Jing Xiao, the most beautiful girl in school (who Lu Yang is hopelessly in love with).

How will the realities of life shape the friendships and love lives of these young adults?

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Ashes of Love // Heavy Sweetness, Ash-Like Frost

Jin Mi is the secret lovechild of the Flower Deity and the Water Immortal, conceived before the Flower Deity suffers a fatal wound.

The deity gives birth to a baby girl (Jin Mi) on her deathbed, and foresees the infant will face a terrible trial by her 10,000th year. To save her from her fate, the Flower Deity gives Jin Mi a pill that makes it impossible for her to ever feel romantic love. Upon her death, she forbids anyone in the Flower Kingdom from revealing the fact that she had a child.

Several thousand years later, Jin Mi is a bumbling little fairy trapped in The Water Mirror- a gilded prison where low-level fairies can live in peace. Jin Mi believes she is a small Grape Fairy, and lives a happy (if not dull) life within the Mirror with her friends.

When a charred bird falls from the heavens into the Water Mirror, Jin Mi decides to eat save the poor little ‘crow’– who in reality is Xu Feng, the mighty phoenix son of the Heavenly Emperor. Her decision to not eat save the Fire God will put them at the heart of plots and schemes, romances and adventures spanning the Flower Kingdom, Heavenly Realm, Demon Kingdom, and the Realm of Mortals.

**Trigger Warning: Contains reference to off-camera sexual assault.**

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Dance of the Phoenix

Feng Wu, a former genius girl in the Junwu Continent, was attacked by her old enemy Zuo Qingluan. In the attack, she lost not only her memories and abilities, but her “phoenix blood” which made her powerful.

In order to save Feng Wu her secret tutor, Master Mu Jiuzhou (a hero thought long dead whose soul is bound inside a ring Feng Wu wears around her neck), exhausted his vitality and fell into a deep coma.

The forces Master Mu Jiuzhou were trying to keep at bay are roiling again, readying for war unless Feng Wu can recover her memories, her power, and survive long enough to release him from the ring.

But if Feng Wu at full power couldn’t stop the evil Zhuo Qingluan’s attack and save herself, what chance does “normal person” Feng Wu have?

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Douluo Continent

Tang San is a hardworking and kind young man who was raised by his single father to be a blacksmith to a small village. His demanding father taught him secret techniques and cultivated unknown abilities while refusing to ever allow him to enter the world of the Soul Masters- heroes who use their inner power to defeat monstrous Soul Beasts and collect their power.

One day, Tang San is attacked in the woods by a fearsome Soul Spider and uses his special techniques to survive, drawing the eye of a nearby Soul Master. The man tests Tang San and discovers that while his Soul Spirit takes the utterly useless form of a common weed (as opposed to say a lion or a wolf), he harbors extreme untapped power and potential.

What only Tang San and his father know is that Tang San is a rare Twin-Soul, in possession of not one Soul Spirit- the Blue Grass- but a second extraordinarily rare weapon spirit capable of being wielded either against foes or in protection of innocents.

Unable to deny Tang San the ability to learn to control his power, his father allows him to leave the protection of the village and embark on a journey to develop his powers and perhaps learn the truth of his parentage.

On his journey Tang San will be joined by the mysterious and naïve Xiao Wu- a seemingly unstoppable and optimistic girl with a rabbit as her Soul Spirit and the ability to absorb the life force of Soul Beasts. They are led by a disgraced Soul Master in Training, Yu Xiao Gang, who was disregarded as a janitor all while studying Soul Masters and developing his own radical theories as to the nature of their power.

Tang San, Xiao Wu, Yu Xiao Gang, and the other friends they meet along the way will become a famous team of heroes known as the “Seven Devils of Shrek Academy”, and be drawn into an imperial struggle for power that threatens to consume their entire continent.

Tang San appears to the world as the master of the Silver Grass Spirit, but once that same world realizes the might of the Weapon Spirit he keeps hidden, he will have to fight with everything he has in order to protect what he holds dear.

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Fairyland Lovers

Bai Qi is a “spiritual doctor” who travels the world to rid spirits of their obsessions and stop them from becoming monsters. Eons ago he himself was at the threshold of becoming an Evil Spirit, and was saved by a Divine Warrior who helped him find a way to move past his darkness before tragically losing her life.

Isolated from the world and alone with a sprig of his lost love’s peach tree, Bai Qi meets the sunny but hapless actress Lin Xia. Not only does the tree come to life in her presence- and not only can she use the tools left behind by his lost lover- she also has the same face.

Curious, Bai Qi enters into a co-habitation agreement with Lin Xia and she helps him cleanse souls before they can turn into Evil Spirits. As their lives intersect, a memory that Bai Qi sealed away for over ten thousand years begins to surface.

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Guardian

Super-Detective Zhao Yunlan meets university professor (and powerful supernatural being) Shen Wei and the two men are instantly drawn together by a past one cannot forget and a future the other cannot guess. As they grow closer, they find themselves at the heart of a high-stakes supernatural battle between unknown enemies.

Will the heroic duo’s unique talents- and special bond- be enough to help them outwit the forces of darkness?

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Handsome Siblings (2020 Netflix Edition)

Hua Wuque is a pillar of righteousness and virtue, the only male disciple of the powerful Yihua Palace cultivation clan. An orphan, he was taken in by the clan leader and her sister and raised with only one goal in life: to find and kill Jiang Xiaoyu, a mighty villain and enemy of Yihua Palace.

So who is Jiang Xiaoyu? Also known as Xiaoyu’er, Jiang Xiaoyu is an orphan himself- the same age as Hua Wuque in fact- raised by the five most feared and hated villains in the world within the confines of the Wicked Canyon. Into Jiang Xiaoyu the villains poured their knowledge, tricks, and ruthlessness, seeking to create the ultimate villain. There is only one problem: As he was raised in the Wicked Canyon and surrounded by nothing but villains, Jiang Xiaoyu mostly uses his abilities to… harm villains and protect the weak.

When Jiang Xiaoyu comes of age and leaves the Wicked Canyon (or rather, becomes too much of a trickster for the villains to handle anymore), Hua Wuque is unleashed to venture from Yihua Palace and hunt down his enemy.

But how could someone kept confined in the Wicked Canyon for the first 18 years of his life be a threat to Yihua Palace? And why must Hua Wuque be the one to kill him (under direction that Jiang Xiaoyu cannot die naturally, be killed by someone else, or kill himself)?

There is a piece of the story Jiang Xiaoyu and Hua Wuque do not know: they are orphans of the same tragedy, in which the divine hero Jiang Feng spurned the love of both leaders of Yihua Palace for a beautiful servant named Hua Yuenu. Hua Yuenu was forced to commit suicide and Jiang Feng killed himself rather than submit to the Ladies of Yihua–

Leaving behind newborn (non-identical) twin sons.

Yihua Palace’s plot is a simple (if OTT) act of vengeance against Jiang Feng’s memory:: Force one brother to murder the other, then reveal to Hua Wuque the sin he has committed and let it drive the boy insane.

Will the truth come out before Wuque finds and kills Xiaoyu, or will the evil Ladies of Yihua Palace finally have the vengeance they have waited for for over 18 years? As Wuque and Xiaoyu’s paths cross more and more they strike up an unlikely friendship, even knowing there is no escaping their dark fate.

**Trigger Warning: Later episodes include off-camera sexual assault and on-camera depictions of near-rape.**

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Hi My Sweetheart

Xue Hai is a kindhearted (and extremely wealthy) but naïve man who has been sheltered by his big sisters his entire life. He decides to go to college in China- where no one knows him- under the name Da Lang and with the image of a poor scholarship student. There Xue Hai meets the dominant, friendless, and rebellious Bao Zhu. Naturally the two fall in love, but after 4 years together, just as he’s going to reveal his identity and propose, Bao Zhu viciously dumps him.

Fast forward three more years. Xue Hai has transformed himself into a handsome but ruthless playboy who treats women as nothing more than toys to be used and cast aside. When he chances across Bao Zhu once more, he decides to launch a campaign to destroy her heart as thoroughly and mercilessly as she did his.

Except Xue Hai is missing one important piece of their love story: Bao Zhu only left him to protect him from her domineering mother, and she has been searching for her beloved Da Lang ever since.

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The King’s Avatar

In the online multiplayer game Glory, Ye Xiu is well known as the undisputed master of professional sports- though no one outside of the professional teams actually knows what he looks like as he hides his face from media and fans. A player since he was a child- and raised largely in professional player training camps- Ye Xiu has no understanding of the outside world.

Halfway through the season, the money-hungry company behind his team, Excellency Era, forces him out and replaces him with an undisciplined hot-shot. Penniless and with nowhere to go, Ye Xiu crosses the street and enters the Happy Internet Cafe. The owner is a diehard fan of the mysterious Ye Xiu, and hires Ye Qiu as an IT manager not for his experience, but for his shared love of the game.

When Glory launches their tenth server, Ye Qiu throws himself into the game once more. Equipped with ten years of gaming experience, memories of an unfinished pledge to a dead friend, and an incomplete self-made weapon, Ye Qiu will rise from the ashes, forge a new team, and take back his crown.

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The Lost Tomb**

50 years ago, a group of Changsha grave robbers known as the “Mystic Nine” dug out manuscripts of the location of treasures from the Warring States period, but soon after almost the entire group was hunted down and slaughtered.

In the present, the young grandchild of the sole survivor, Wu Xie, discovers a secret within his grandfather’s notes as well as half of a silk manuscript that may reveal the location of the lost tomb. But there is one problem- the other half of the manuscript is held by a shady organization of tomb raiders eager to break in and steal whatever cultural relics are inside the tomb.

Wu Xie has a “National Treasure” moment and decides that in order to stop the objects in the tomb from vanishing into the black market he will break in first and recover whatever is inside (’I’m going to steal the Declaration of Independence…’).

Wu Xie is helped on his journey by his beloved “Third Uncle” Wu Sanxing, his uncle’s right hand man Panzi, and the mysterious Xiao Ge - a tomb raider who seems to know of traps before they are sprung and whose hand has been mutilated in a way not seen among tomb robbing families in over a century.

They expected to find a lost tomb, perhaps chase away some thieves, and learn about an exciting piece of lost history. What they did not expect was for the tomb to strike back, the dead to rise, and the past to fight and keep what secrets it holds.

Who exactly are this alternate group of tomb robbers? What are they searching for? What exactly is protecting the tomb? Whose side is Xiao Ge truly on? And- most crucially- can Wu Xie survive long enough to find the answers?

** This recommendation is part of a broader series of shows and movies, all adapted from “The Gravedigger’s Notebook” and its sequels::

The Lost Tomb (2015)

The Lost Tomb 2: Explore With the Note (2016)

Time Raiders (2016 movie)

The Mystic Nine (2016)

Tomb of the Sea (2018)

Reunion: The Sound of the Providence (which gets its own recommendation below; 2019-2020)

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Love O2O

** O = letter, not number

Wei-Wei has both beauty and brains. A computer goddess, she aspires to be an online game developer. In her spare time, she plays her favorite online game ‘A Chinese Ghost Story’- where she has made a name for herself as the top female player on the entire server.

After her online husband dumps her, she gets a message from legendary player Yixiao Naihe- asking to become her online husband (marriages in-game offer certain benefits and quest lines single players cannot achieve).

Little does Wei-Wei know that Yixiao Naihe is also her college senior and the most desired man on campus, Xiao Nai.

Will their online chemistry lead to a real-life romance? Yes. Of course it will. It’s in the title.

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Miss The Dragon

As a humble maid, Liu Ying never expected her life to be anything other than ordinary. Content with the world and her place in it, she spent her days tending to injured creatures and assisting her mistress Xia Hou Xue. But when Liu Ying finds an injured little snake and nurses it back to health, she has no idea how her life is about to change.

That little snake turns out to be a thousand year old Draong King named Yu Chi Long Yan. He falls in love with Liu Ying, and decides to repay her kindness by naming her as his queen.

And then Xia Hou Xue is captured by a wolf demon. Liu Ying flips the script- begging Yu Chi Long Yan to repay her kindness instead by rescuing her mistress and then keeping her safe for three lifetimes. Trapped by his word, Yu Chi Long Yan agrees to do so, though he secretly remains by Liu Ying’s side.

Now in her fourth lifetime, Liu Ying is reincarnated as Gu Qing Yan. She slowly becomes aware of his existence in her life- and her past lives as well. After waiting three lifetimes to be reunited with his lost love, Yu Chi Long Yan will fight with everything he has to keep her safe and get the Happily Ever After they should have had three thousand years ago.

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My Roommate is a Detective

Shanghai in 1925 is caught between gang leaders and the European powers colonizing China.

A resourceful young police officer named Qiao Chu Sheng is on the trail of a brutal but devious killer. Realizing that the police force will need some extra help with this difficult case, he decides to form an elite crime-busting detective team. He reaches out Lu Yao, a Cambridge graduate a slick con-man.

Qiao Chu Sheng has learned that Lu Yao has remarkable powers of deduction and a brilliant mind – and believes he can help crack this difficult case. To round off the team, he enlists the help of Bai You Ning, a focused young female reporter for a daily newspaper. A free-thinking, independent young woman, she has a strong sense of justice – and pledges to help catch the killer.

The trio form a small detective squad that specializes in solving strange and unsettling murder mysteries.

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Oh My Emperor

Fei-Fei, a young doctor, is wounded in an accident and finds herself trapped in the ancient and mystical nation of Huang Dao. The people of Huang Dao are ruled by a king born of the stars- the physical embodiment of one of the twelve zodiac constellations. To keep discord from arising among the people, the Twelve Zodiac Masters govern together to keep the peace.

But a thirteenth sign has been forcibly subjugated, it’s Lord executed, and its people scattered to the wind. The lost sign- Ophiuchus- is rising once more- and Fei-Fei is its (unwilling) Master.

It only complicates matters slightly that Fei-Fei finds herself between the handsome and charming Master of Aquarius and his nephew- the cold Master of Capricorn (who is also the Emperor). Can Fei-Fei keep her identity secret long enough to solve the mystery of the Ophiuchus purge- or is Huang Dao doomed to destruction?

**This drama is a showpiece for members of the Chinese pop group X-Nine, do not judge it by the same standards as a traditional drama. Showpiece dramas tend to be a bit silly.

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Reunion: The Sound of the Providence**

Wu Xie, “Fatty” Wang Pangzi, and the quasi-immortal tomb raider Xiao Ge (AKA Zheng Qiling, Kylin, and “Poker Face”) have faced many dangerous tombs together over the past twelve years.

Now, it is time for them to go on their last great adventure as the so-called “Iron Triangle” before Wu Xie sets off on the journey all must eventually make: death. He always thought his end would come in a dangerous tomb, but instead it will be lung cancer that claims his life. With only 3-4 months left to live, Wu Xie hides the truth of his illness from his friends and family, revealing the truth only to Xiao Ge.

Once upon a time, Wu Xie was told that when a man meets his death he must do so with a clear conscience. But something has been weighing on Wu Xie- his Third Uncle’s disappearance at the end of their first adventure. Right on time, a message from his long lost uncle appears, setting Wu Xie on a desperate mission to find him before the cancer eating away at his body destroys him at last.

This will most likely be Wu Xie’s final journey, but he will do anything in his power to make sure his friends and family will be safe long after his time is up. In the final 3-4 months of Wu Xie’s life he will seek to unravel the mystery of the “Thunder City”- starting with the most dangerous tomb he’s ever explored, The South Sea King’s Tomb.

The sound of thunder hides a secret men have killed for, but is there really a way to hear the words of gods within it? Someone clearly thought so, but who? Is Uncle Sanxing still alive, or is someone in the shadows guiding Wu Xie to them?

Wu Xie’s enemies thought he was dangerous before, but now he is a dying man with a mission. There is no telling what lengths he will go to in order to achieve his goals. He might just manage to die in a tomb after all…

** This recommendation is just the latest installment in an entire series of stories adapted from “The Gravedigger’s Notebook” and related novels::

The Lost Tomb (2015)

The Lost Tomb 2: Explore With the Note (2016)

Time Raiders (2016 movie)

The Mystic Nine (2016)

Tomb of the Sea (2018)

Reunion: The Sound of the Providence (2019-2020)

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The Romance of Tiger and Rose

Chen Xiao Qian has dedicated her life to making her dream of becoming a well-respected screenwriter come true. Standing on the production set of sweeping dramas she penned through endless blood, sweat, and tears, Xiao Qian can hardly believe what she is seeing: her work, come to life!

Except it isn’t a set. And her work truly has come to life.

Her script is a simple one: the heirs of two rival cities who seek to destroy one another enter into a doomed romance that will lead to endless betrayals and a war that will kill the male lead, Han Shuo.

There is just one problem- Xiao Qian wakes in the body of Han Shuo’s first wife on the day he will murder her! The only way for Xiao Qian to return to this world is to survive the story, but in keeping herself alive longer the script begins to change, and Han Shuo begins to fall in love with the wrong person.

At first it is easy for Xiao Qian to keep herself alive- just go along with the script! But the story wants to return to the original plot, which means characters who should be friends become enemies, enemies become friends, and Xiao Qian might not live long enough to find her way home.

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The Untamed

On the cliffs of the Nightless City, upon defeating his enemies in a bloody slaughter, the cruel and vicious Yiling Patriarch- Wei Wuxian- threw himself to his death.

Sixteen years later, he is resurrected by a madman and given a second chance to right what went so terribly wrong long ago. Wei Wuxian reunites with the honorable, righteous, and stern Lan Wangji- his confidant, soulmate, and best friend.

How can someone as upstanding as Lan Wangji befriend the monstrous and hated Yiling Patriarch? What turned the happy and popular Wei Wuxian into the man who slaughtered thousands at Nightless by weaponizing the souls of the dead?

And what terrible secret was Wuxian resurrected to unearth?

The past is not always what it seems, and there is no clean line between right and wrong.

**Don’t worry if you’re lost when the show starts, that is by design. Near the end of episode 2 the show will enter a 30 episode long flashback sequence to answer all questions.

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Well Intended Love (Season 1: Drama Version)

Seasons 1 and 2 of “Well Intended Love” feature the same stars playing the same characters, but the storylines are alternate-universes of one another telling the story from a different genre. Each season is wholly independent of one another.

A third-rate actress with leukemia becomes entangled with the handsome but cold CEO Ling.

In order to receive a bone marrow transplant and contniue her career as an actress, Xia Lin enters into a secret marriage with Ling Yi Zhou. Despite the conspiracies and misunderstandings they encounter, the two begin to find true love.

But one question nags at Xia Lin’s mind:: Why did the cold, controlling, and distant Ling YiZhou need her to play the role of wife?

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Well Intended Love (Season 2: Rom-Com Version)

Seasons 1 and 2 of “Well Intended Love” feature the same stars playing the same characters, but the storylines are alternate-universes of one another telling the story from a different genre. Each season is wholly independent of one another.

Rising TV superstar Xia Lin finds herself embroiled in scandal after a run-in with business mogul Ling Yizhou at a party. To clear up any misunderstandings the two prepare a joint press conference– where Xia Lin is stunned by Ling Yizhou’s statement that the two are- in fact- an engaged couple.

Ling Yizhou convinces Xia Lin to play fiancee for a period of one year, after which they can go their separate ways. To save face in front of her fans, Xia Lin agrees. She gradually begins to fall for the lovable and doting Ling Yizhou.

Someone works in the shadows to destroy everything Ling Yizhou holds dear- and the closer he gets to the heart of the conspiracy, the more he realizes Xia Lin may have a target on her back as well.

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Word of Honor // Faraway Wanderers

Zhou Zi Shu has served as the leader of Heaven’s Window for much of his life. A once righteous and honorable sect who acted as an elite Secret Service for the royal family, a corrupt prince has turned them into his personal assassin’s guild. With their oaths to Heaven’s Window as nooses around their throats, most of Zhou Zi Shu’s elders and friends have chosen death over continued service.

Wholly disillusioned, Zhou Zi Shu only wants to atone for the crimes he was forced to commit under his oaths to the prince. He endures the slow execution of Heaven’s Window- a process that sees seven nails inserted into the victim and ushers in a slow and painful death that takes three years to play out.

By gaming the system he helped create, Zhou Zi Shu manages to buy himself an extra year and a half of life to wander the world and wipe some of the blood from his slate.

In his wanderings, he is pulled into a conspiracy surrounding a young boy and meets a strange young man named Wen Ke Xing who sticks to him like glue. Zhou Zi Shu and Wen Ke Xing grow closer and closer throughout their journey to find a mysterious treasure that is rumored to give its owner unlimited power.

But just who is Wen Ke Xing? What is he really after? And most importantly of all- can Zhou Zi Shu really trust his new companion?

[j10kkuno]

Months falling away in VR

Yuno did a job with Ramee for the first time in months!!!! It was pure scuff and entirely by chance and it took a few minutes for them to fall into each other, but eventually, the months of crumbling trust and distance fell away and it felt like it was May again and they trusted each other and they were both so happy chance led them to each other.

So, Yuno wanted to go into the VAR, and it let him in, but he found an attempt in progress(Which it should've rejected his attempt to enter) and found Ramee, Autumn(She was also so happy to be able to do a job with Yuno), Anto(widepeepoHappy), HOA Freddy, and Gomer(Timmac's crim-a casino manager who only woke up to troll), and they agreed to work with him. There was some stress because X knew Yuno was going to VAR so Yuno with the intention of it being quick and it wasn't so he wanted to rob CG but he got talked down.

Not long after that, the original hacker, Freddy, started failing the 8 like 5 times so they decided to have Yuno take over and he was like "Let's show why CB trusts us" and one shotted the first 8. Ramee was immediately like "Good fucking shit, Yuno, good fucking shit."

And everything fell away. Ramee was taking bullets for Yuno. Ramee went down and Yuno immediately threw himself off the center to go looking for him to revive him. They went looting together. Ramee joked about getting Yuno a CG chain. They talked about how it had been so long since they had done a job together, but they were happy.

In VR, they found each other again, and as a fan, I'm happy, but as a writer, there's something painfully tragic about that. That only in a video game could they find their old friendship again. Could reality fall away and they could find the old times again.

Afterwards, K was on the roof and had almost shot down X's heli when he and Dundee tried to pick up Yuno and things were Very Tense but they smoothed it over with words with no guns drawn. Yuno was very happy. First time in a long time they've all met after a heist with it not ending in a gun fight.

Ramee called after Yuno left in the heli and Yuno offered to split his gun loot(You can take the VAR loot now and Yuno ended up with like 12 guns since CG was very supportive of him being a loot goblin) but Ramee said all that mattered was that he helped them willingly and they both sounded so happy it all worked out.

(Then K called Yuno and offered him a chain. Yuno thanked him and he's already trolling Tony with the idea of getting a CG chain. Tony is Not Happy and is like "Think of the fanart!")

But seriously, Tony and Yuno had some good conversation in the car. Tony was very proud of Yuno for representing CB well("my boy!") and defusing the situation with X because it never goes well. Yuno hesitiated and then said he probably shouldn't admit it, but he met Randy and Ramee before he met CB, and Tony was like "Wait, really?" And Yuno said it had been a long time since they did a job together and Tony understood that it felt nice and Yuno was like "I know it was just VR but Ramee was tanking bullets for me and he's a pretty good friend" and Tony was just like "I'm glad you had a good time."

It was very sweet. Like Tony understands Yuno better, understands his history and why Randy and Ramee mean a lot to him. And like an older brother, he just wants to see him happy, and Yuno was.

There was no fighting. No shooting. Everyone got loot. He got to do a job with Ramee for the first time in months. And Sykkuno kept mentioning it as getting to do a job with Ramee. I know Lang and K interacted a bit too(I think someone said they're doing wellness check's on each other's gangs to make sure no one on the other side is going insane over the casino heists-they really are such dads. Who each have two sons who are Romeo/Juliet with the other guy's sons but shhhh. K heard Tony yelling at his radio and was like "They're at the same place we are." At least they're not suffering alone.).

However the casino heist is still hopeless. I saw a lot of funny clips from Dean hanging around the CB guys at the casino(Tony and Mickey tried to say all the trash cans were full so could they get into the trash room to throw something away and Dean just spawned a new trash can)

[foxghost]

Joyful Reunion, Chapter 46

Translator: foxghost @foxghost tumblr/ko-fi1 Beta: meet-me-in-oblivion @meet-me-in-oblivion tumblr Original by 非天夜翔 Fei Tian Ye Xiang Masterpost | Characters, Maps & Other Reference Index

Book 2, Chapter 12 (part 1)

With one’s time on earth, there are always some things that you must do no matter how dangerous and difficult you know them to be …

But what can he do?

Early summer wind rustles through the trees, and a smattering of sunlight reflected off the glossy leaves sways this way and that over Duan Ling.

If someone is to ask him what he wants to do right now, all Duan Ling wants is to know where Li Jianhong is buried so he can go have a talk with his father.

He sits there staring into space thinking about the poison Lang Junxia added to his food. Again and again he’s faced imminent death but in every instance he’s survived; with one near-death experience after another, he’s never managed to actually die, so can he even try to commit suicide again?

Should he leave Xichuan and roam far and wide, hide his name beneath a pseudonym and become someone that nobody knows? But what’s the point of doing that? He’ll never forget all of this. Perhaps he’ll never come to terms with it all, not even until the day he dies.

And if he doesn’t leave, what can he do? Stay here?

How did Li Jianhong die? Where did he sacrifice himself?

For the entire afternoon Duan Ling sits there thinking, and slowly he comes to a decision. He can’t die just like that, nor can he leave just like that; he still has a lot of things that he wants to accomplish. Even though doing these things are no less difficult to him than moving the mountains to fill the seas, he no longer has his father to shield him and to plan out everything for him — he can only rely on himself.

I’ll just have to play it by ear. Duan Ling tells himself that if he ever gets to a point where he really can’t hold on anymore, it may instead be a kind of deliverance.

When Wu Du comes back, he tosses Duan Ling two pieces of cooked beef like he’s feeding a dog. Duan Ling catches them and after glancing at it briefly, begins to eat. Wu Du gives the room a once over, and rather satisfied with the state of it, sits down in front of the table and once again starts reading his Book of Medicine.

“Can you read?” Wu Du asks.

Duan Ling nods. Without bringing up what happened last night, Wu Du hands him a prescription. “Weigh these out accordingly.”

Duan Ling can tell it’s a formula for poison, and he has no idea who it’s for. He weighs and dispenses each ingredient; this is something he’s long since gotten used to doing during his stay in Luoyang. But Wu Du’s formula is quite distinctive — ingredients for “great cold” and “great heat” are mixed together in the same formula, and there are a lot of minor, concealed poisons in it as well.2

“What’s this for?”

Wu Du stops what he’s doing and shoots Duan Ling a glance. Duan Ling realises that he shouldn’t have asked.

“If you ask one more question, when it’s put together I’ll try it on you first.”

Duan Ling doesn’t reply, and it occurs to Wu Du that this kid isn’t even afraid of dying, so of course he’s not going to care. He heaves a sigh as he feels he really can’t do a thing to him after all.

Once Duan Ling finishes weighing out all the ingredients, he grinds them down into a powder, mixing in honey to make pills before hardening them with heat. He surmises that this is a hidden poison; the one who’s taken it may not even have noticed they’re poisoned, but they’ll need to take the antidote periodically, otherwise the poison will take effect and kill them.

“Are you perhaps thinking that since you’re not even scared of dying, of course you’re not scared I’d poison you to death?” Wu Du gives Duan Ling a casual glance and adds, “I have plenty of ways to make you wish you were dead.”

Duan Ling’s lips twitch — he wants to say I’m not thinking that, but the slight upward tilt of his mouth seems to infuriate Wu Du. He sets his brush aside and grabs Duan Ling by the lapel. His voice is cold. “Why are you laughing? What are you laughing at?”

Startled, fear surfaces in Duan Ling’s eyes. Wu Du suddenly gets the feeling that he’s seen this gaze somewhere before, but he can’t quite remember where.

Thankfully most of the time Wu Du is only mean on the outside and soft on the inside, and he does nothing more than give Duan Ling several threatening remarks before letting him go again, ordering him to get to work. As long as Duan Ling doesn’t go out of his way to provoke him, Wu Du is not about to give him any grief for want of anything else to do.

For an entire day, Duan Ling is thinking about what he’s going to do next. Recalling the conversation between Wu Du and the old man named He, they mentioned a “crown prince”, which means that after father’s death, Great Chen got a crown prince. It’s unlikely that this crown prince is his brother, and if Duan Ling ties this conjecture to Lang Junxia poisoning him … he suddenly has a theory, and this theory makes a chill go down his spine …

Can it be possible that Lang Junxia has found someone to pass for Duan Ling after father’s death? Does Mu Kuangda know of this? If Mu Kuangda is conspiring with Lang Junxia, then Duan Ling mustn’t let Lang Junxia know that he’s in the grand chancellor’s estate. But if Mu Kuangda knows about this, then why didn’t Lang Junxia hand Duan Ling over to the chancellor when he came looking, but chose to poison him and get rid of his body instead?

On this foundation Duan Ling works his way to an extremely brazen hypothesis. And though it seems utterly insane, it’s actually not far from the truth: Lang Junxia had managed to pull the wool over everyone’s eyes to bring back a fake crown prince, and Mu Kuangda has no inkling of Duan Ling’s existence. From here Duan Ling deduces that after his father’s death, Mu Kuangda thought he had full power over the imperial court and could dominate the government as long as he controlled fourth uncle, but to his surprise, the sudden appearance of a crown prince has thrown the game board into confusion. So who exactly is this poison made for?

Duan Ling’s mind goes through a number of possibilities in mere moments — if the truth is just as he hypothesised, then the chance of his survival will be quite high. After all, even if he stays in Xichuan, if Lang Junxia ever finds out he hasn’t died he’s not about to risk barging into the chancellor’s estate brashly to commit murder.

Staying by Wu Du’s side is presently the safest choice he has, and now he must confirm his guesses before deciding on his next course of action.

Once Duan Ling is clear-headed again his mind moves rather fast, and he runs through myriad possibilities in his head as he grinds the ingredients into a powder. He’s even considered the possibility that the crown prince may be a real one. Let’s say his father fell for someone after he returned to the imperial court and left behind a posthumous heir, that may be possible … no, not really. Setting his father’s moral character aside, even if there is a crown prince he must still be a tiny little baby so there’s no need to make such a fuss and poison him. And besides, this is clearly a poison made for an adult.

While he’s thinking all this, a young man shows up at the front gate.

“Wu Du!” The young man looks startled when he sees Duan Ling, and shoots him several more curious glances.

Duan Ling notices the young man’s delicate, pretty features and his high-class clothes, and comes to the conclusion that he’s probably someone important. There’s no young servant with him, so he’s probably here to ask for something.

Wu Du goes outside and says to the young man, “Mister Mu.”

That young man would be Mu Kuangda’s son, Mu Qing; he looks over Duan Ling before he turns to Wu Du with an arrogant air, and orders, “I’d like you to fill this prescription.”

“Without orders from the chancellor I can’t fill a prescription for you. If you want to use any poison, you’ll need a written slip from the chancellor or have him give me a verbal order directly.”

Mu Qing produces a prescription, but Wu Du simply doesn’t take it from him. Mu Qing frowns, displeased. “You really won’t fill it?”

Wu Du doesn’t say anything, standing quietly before the gallery. Without minding where it lands, Mu Qing tosses out the sheet of paper. The prescription flies this way and that until it falls onto the ground. “Think it over. I’ll give you three days.”

Mu Qing doesn’t bother waiting for Wu Du’s reply before he turns around and leaves.

Wu Du is so angry he’s shaking. A moment passes before he bends down to pick up that prescription and throws it onto the table.

Meanwhile, Duan Ling is hardening the pills over heat, and after he wipes his hands clean he goes to take a look at the prescription. At first he’s wondering what kind of prescription can’t simply be filled out at any apothecary, but sure enough, it’s an extra strength aphrodisiac.

“Will you fill it?” Duan Ling asks.

Wu Du sits back on the daybed, and picks up the teapot to pour a cup of tea. He says frigidly, “Scram.”

And so Duan Ling files the prescription away, and when he finishes hardening the pills, Wu Du tosses him a wooden box. Duan Ling separates and packs the pills away properly, and leaves the room as usual.

A stroke of lightning flashes across the horizon. At night it begins to rain, and the roof in the courtyard house is leaking as well.

Halfway through dinner, a servant comes to inform Wu Du that the chancellor would like to see him, so Wu Du can only put his chopsticks down to go see Mu Kuangda. He comes back soaked like a drowned rat and leaves again as soon as he picks up the wooden box.

Duan Ling gets several basins to catch water all over Wu Du’s room; the drip-drop of water on basins clinks and clanks, making quite the commotion. Thunder rumbles, and Duan Ling curls up inside the woodshed. Some time later, Wu Du pushes the door open.

“I’ve been calling you. Did you not hear me?!”

Wu Du is bare to the waist, his sturdy shoulders and back covered in water; all he’s wearing is a pair of thin white pants, soaked through and sticking to his thighs, turning a shade of skin.

“What?” Duan Ling asks blankly.

“I told you to get in here!” Wu Du says furiously.

Thus Duan Ling follows him all the way inside at a half run. Wu Du tells him, “Dry the clothes and books by the fire.”

Duan Ling hangs up several items of clothing by the stove, wiping down the water stains, and dries the boots by the fire for him. Quite a few books were right up against the wall and there’s water dripping down the walls as well. Duan Ling pulls the bookshelf a little ways from the wall, and opens up the books, flattening the pages carefully to dry.

“Sleep over there.” Wu Du points at a corner to let Duan Ling know that he doesn’t have to go back to sleep in the woodshed. Duan Ling helps him make the bed first before making his own, and he lies in the corner listening to the sound of water falling into basins and gradually falling asleep. In the middle of the night, Wu Du throws something over at him, startling him awake.

“Keep it down,” Wu Du says, “You’re so noisy I can’t get to sleep.”

Duan Ling is confused for a moment before he suddenly realises that he may have been talking in his sleep, and the thought of it scares him so much his back is all at once covered in a sheen of sweat. He gets up to pour out the water accumulated in the basins.

The rain lasts for a full three days; Duan Ling has no way to go out, and Wu Du is shut up in his house all day long. He can’t go out in the rain, and Mu Kuangda doesn’t summon him either. Aside from two meals delivered daily he’s largely left to do nothing on his own. Wu Du never had much money to begin with, and when Zhao Kui fell from grace what little savings he had was confiscated by the imperial court, which Mu Kuangda seems to have no interest in helping him recover. All he has to his name is the bit of honorarium given him when he pledged his services to Mu Kuangda.

Today, Duan Ling spies Wu Du counting his money — one tael, two taels, three taels, four taels … adding up all his silver bits he doesn’t even have ten taels in total, and Duan Ling thinks to himself, Wu Du is so poor. Duan Ling has never earned any money, but because he’s experienced hardship in Shangzi before, he can understand the importance of money somewhat. A single copper confounds even a hero, and he has to buy medicinal ingredients as well; money in, money out, so there isn’t much left over.

A visitor comes to call while Wu Du is calculating his life savings, and he grabs the silvers and puts it away properly in his money purse.

“This roof really ought to be patched.” The visitor is Chang Liujun holding up an umbrella. Mu Qing is beneath this umbrella too.

“Did you fill the prescription?” Mu Qing asks.

“Without the Grand Chancellor’s orders, I can’t fill a prescription for you.”

Mu Qing turns to look at Chang Liujun. Chang Liujun and Mu Qings stand in the courtyard without coming in. Neither does Wu Du go outside.

Chang Liujun says, “Just do it. Why bother with all these rules? Once you put the medicine together we’ll get your roof patched.”

Wu Du stares at him in silence.

Mu Qing says, “I’ll give you another two days. Do as you see fit. I’m leaving.”

Duan Ling watches Wu Du from the corner. Outside, Chang Liujun and Mu Qing have gone, and so Duan Ling goes to the table to fill Mu Qing’s prescription.

As soon as Duan Ling opens the drawer, Wu Du gets up all of a sudden. Surprised, Duan Ling tries to get out of the way, and he bumps into the table in the confusion and knocks it over. Wu Du picks up a vase and raises his hand as though he’s about to smash it over Duan Ling’s head, but before the vase even hits him Duan Ling is already screaming. In that instant, Wu Du stops moving, his hand hanging in the air. For a long time, the vase doesn’t come down.

Duan Ling has his eyes squeezed tight but he doesn’t feel pottery cracking over him, and he turns his head to look at Wu Du. So disgruntled he can barely stand it, Wu Du puts the vase down and makes sure it’s not going to fall over, and still holding Duan Ling by the lapel, he drags him to the medicine cabinet. “Go on. Fill the prescription. Let’s just see what you end up with.”

Duan Ling just stands there. A heartbeat later, Wu Du howls at him angrily, “Do it! If you make a mistake I’ll kill you!”

Duan Ling quivers, pulls the drawer open, and grabbing the ingredients from memory he brings it over for Wu Du to look over.

“It’s just these,” Duan Ling says, “you have all of them.”

“Go get the metal file and make a powder out of it,” Wu Du says.

Duan Ling follows his instructions and grinds them down to powder. Wu Du beckons to him. “Come over here.”

Duan Ling senses danger and backs away, but Wu Du takes one step forward and forces Duan Ling’s mouth open with his left hand, pouring the entire packet of powder into his mouth.

Duan Ling can’t stop shaking; his mouth is filled with that aphrodisiac, and he knows if he swallows it’ll definitely kill him. Fortunately Wu Du doesn’t try to make things more difficult for him beyond that, and Duan Ling runs off frantically to rinse his mouth.

When he’s finished raising his mouth, Wu Du has gone to lie down on his bed to take his afternoon nap. Duan Ling puts away everything, taking a lot of care to be quiet so as not to wake Wu Du, and closes up the mouldy books. As he cleans up he finds a book called “Book of the Medicine Sage” with lots of plants he’s never seen nor heard of, and he begins to read; he reads until the sun sets and Wu Du gets out of bed.

Wu Du opens up the drawers and starts filling a prescription personally. One glance tells Duan Ling that it’s the same extra strength aphrodisiac he filled earlier at noon, and he thinks, aren’t you just making more work, doing it again yourself?

Finally, Wu Du finishes up and tosses a small packet to Duan Ling. “Go deliver it. You know who to give it to.”

Duan Ling doesn’t really dare go out, but he’ll probably get a beating if he doesn’t. It’s one thing to get a beating, but what worries him more is that it may make Wu Du suspicious if he refuses to go, and so he picks up the packet and runs out in the rain to see Mu Qing.

I do not monetise my hobby translations, but if you’d like to support my work generally or support my light novel habit, you can either buy me a coffee or commission me. This is also to note that if you see this message anywhere else than on tumblr, do come to my tumblr. It’s ad-free. ↩︎

Great cold and great heat are Traditional Chinese Medicine concepts. Usually you’re trying to balance heat with cold (in a patient) or vice versa, so you don’t often see ingredients for both “great” heat and cold in the same prescription. ↩︎