#the show mostly gives the impression of the angels and demons always being enemies with the exception of the starcrossed love interests

[dateamonster]

spent a surprising length of time today binge reading angel's friends, a pretty good italian comic book series that was adapted into a pretty mediocre early 2000s cartoon series. i had been vaguely aware of the cartoon in the sense that kid me was prone to imprinting on anything with even a passing resemblance to winx club, but didnt know about the comics, and its kind of amazing how much better the comics are, in spite of apparently never being finished :(

like its not a masterpiece or anything and its got a couple of Very Questionable character designs but man im a sucker for silly angels vs devils brand fantasy media and the way the comics approach that type of story with some actually pretty fresh lore ideas (whether or not all of it necessarily makes perfect sense..) really gets me in my overanalyzing-childrens-media-worldbuilding brain.

also (with the exception of aforementioned questionable designs) its just so much cuter and overall visually appealing than the show like look at this

i dont even like dislike the show designs or anything theyre very y2k but im biased towards the one where they actually look like kids

[amor-immortalem]

My Adoring Fan Chapter 6

Chapter 5

Before he knew it, a week had passed. It was the start of a new school term. As Aurelius rolled out of bed, he shut off the alarm so it wouldn’t go off at its normal time. He didn’t sleep well the night before, not because he was excited to return to his studies but more like he was debating if he should really betray his parents’ trust when it came to meeting with this girl who’d sent him the letter. If he was being honest, the half demon was hoping that the letter was forged.

Ever since he’d met her that night, Aurelius often found his thoughts wandering back to her. He wasn’t lying when he told his sister that he thought she was pretty. No one had ever had this effect on the sixteen-year-old before so why was she so different?

“I don’t have time to think on this any longer.” He sighed. “Maybe some tea will take my mind off things?” The half-demon makes his way out to the kitchen and is only slightly surprised to see his mother in the kitchen already making herself some tea. He doesn’t know why, but he still figured she’d be asleep at four a.m. like a normal person.

“Aurelius, good morning. Why’re you up so early?” Arella asks as she sets the kettle on the stove. “You should go back to sleep for a bit.”

“No, I’m good, Mum. I can’t really sleep all that well anyway. Can I have some tea?”

“Sure. Do you want to talk about it?”

“Yeah, I guess that couldn’t hurt...” He lays his arms on the counter as he’s leaning against it, chin resting on top of his arms. “Or maybe this is something I should talk to Dad about? I don’t know...”

“Oh, I didn’t realize it was one of those things...”

“No, no, no,” He waves his hands about as a blush covers his cheeks, reaching down to his neck and up to his ears, “It’s not about that kind of thing. More like... relationship advice? Girls in general? I don’t know.” Arella only laughed softly as her son let out a groan. “Please don’t laugh, Mum.”

“I’m sorry, Sweetheart.” Arella sighed as she pulled the kettle off the stove and got two cups down for them, “I wasn’t laughing at you, more like the misunderstanding. If you feel more comfortable talking to Dad about this then that’s fine, but you know you can talk to me about relationships or girls too as well, right? I’ve had more than my fair share of relationships with women as well so I think I can provide some helpful insight too.”

“Yeah... It’s about that girl I met the other day. You know, the one who I can’t be sure sent me that letter?”

“Yes. She hasn’t tried to contact you again, has she?”

“No, but it’s just.... I can’t stop thinking about that little bit of time we interacted. I’ve never really given much thought to anyone I’ve ever met before but she still sticks in my mind for some reason. Is there something wrong with me?”

“No, not at all. It’s perfectly normal to have someone on your mind at this age.”

“So... there was something wrong with me before then?”

“No, that’s not true either. You’re perfectly normal, Son. Some people just aren’t interested in things like that and that’s okay too. What worries me is who this girl is. You don’t know all that much about her and the fact that she may have sent you that letter doesn’t bode very well. It makes me worried for you.”

“If we have classes together at RAD, I’ll have to talk to her since she’ll likely take a seat next to me at some point and I have a reputation to uphold- well more like I don’t want to be rude. And I kind of want to talk to her too. If she was a fan, she pretended not to be and it makes me wonder if she was being considerate since I nearly trampled her trying to get away from ‘Zalea. She was... normal. I’ve never gotten that from someone outside of our family.”

“Well,” Arella slid the teacup toward Aurelius. “I can’t stop you from talking to this girl. You seem rather dead set on it too. But please, for the love of your grandfather, don’t go off with her alone.

“’for the love of my grandfather,’ why do you guys always say that? It’s not just you and dad but my uncles too. What’s with that? I’ve always thought it was a weird saying. And Max says something similar. Are they related?”

“Yeah, they are. You see, your Father and Uncles- save for Uncle Satan- were once angels a long, long time ago. All angels are “created” by God so technically he would be considered your grandfather as everyone in our family still refers to him as ‘Father’.”

Aurelius nods, “Oh, Alright. I always just thought Dad had always been a demon... but wait don’t you have distant heritage from the Celestial Realm too? That’s where you and I get our magic from, right?”

“It’s… messy. Technically, the angel I’m descended from was reincarnated into a human and Angels aren’t actually related by blood to begin with in the way you’re related to your siblings so really, it was anything goes when it came to me- genetically speaking that is.” Arella was skirting around her connection to Lilith as much as she could as they hadn’t yet told any of the kids in the family about this kind of thing. “I really wouldn’t think too hard on it if I were you. It’ll give you a headache.” The boy only nodded as he sipped on his tea. He had never seen his mother trying so hard to skirt around something she didn’t want him to know. “Anywho, are you hungry? I can start on breakfast.

“Yeah, thanks. I can help if you want.”

“Thank you, that sounds lovely.”

“Also... Can I have that letter back...”

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Getting up and dressed for school was difficult for Persephone. Ever since she’d overheard her dormmates snickering about the letter they’d forged and sent to Aurelius, she’d been dreading the idea of seeing him at school. She wanted to get to know him but now he was probably going to avoid her at all costs. As she looked herself over in the mirror, she hoped he hadn’t put two and two together yet or that the impression she made on him that day would be enough to tip him off that something was wrong.

Instead of having breakfast with her dormmates, the succubus just headed out for school. She was too nervous to actually keep anything down. She kept looking around, Persephone was hoping to spot the object of her affections. And then she saw them, the three girls that he lived with at the House of Lamentation: his sister, cousin, and a sorcerer-in-training that had come to stay with them. But Aurelius was nowhere to be seen.

Persephone moved to trail just behind them, just far enough away to not look like she was eavesdropping but close enough to be able to hear their conversation.

“A new term, a new start!” Zulima smiles as she stretches. “It sucks that I’m grounded. What I wouldn’t kill to go out shopping after school for skin care products. There’s a new line I’ve been interested in trying that comes out today.”

“Hey, that’s all on you, Missy!” Azalea grumbled. “And what’s worse ya got my brother booted out of the dorm and grounded too for doin’ your dirty work.”

Zulima squawked at that as she threw her arms around her cousin. “That wasn’t my intention though! I said I was sowwy.”

“Hey, hey, hey none of that cutesy shit, got it? Cut it out.”

Zulima pouted at that as Max laughed softly.

“Come on, Zulima, you have to admit that you were in the wrong even though it all panned out in the end.” The human smiles.

“MAX!”

“Huh? Oh shit- Sorry, Sunshine, it slipped.”

“Wait... Wait did my plan actually work?” The silver-haired girl’s eyes lit up. “It did, didn’t it?! Stars, I have to tell Daddy.” The sixteen-year-old dashed off.

“Zulima stop! Don’t- aaaaand she’s gone...” The half-demon only sighs,” Damn, what are we gonna do with her...? You know we’ve just unleashed a monster, right? She’s gonna tell everyone.”

“Yeah, I mean we could just go public with it ourselves. That wouldn’t be so bad, would it?”

“Well, no, under normal circumstances it wouldn’t, but I still have enemies at school. Sure, it's no secret that you’re important ta me but if our classmates knew we were datin’, they’d go after you ta get ta me. I know you’ve been workin’ on improvin’ your magic and Solomon even gave ya that charm that’ll mostly protect ya from most attacks from demons but it still makes me nervous since I take advanced courses while the rest of y’all take regular classes and I can’t be with ya ‘cept for homeroom and lunch. I mean my family can know, that’s all well ‘n good. They all like ya anyway but the reason I didn’t want Zulima knowin’ is that when it comes to secrets, she’s got the loosest set of lips this side of the human world...”

“Aww thanks for being worried about me,” She slung an arm around Azalea as they walked.

The white and black-haired girl stiffened slightly. Even after a year, she still wasn’t really used to someone outside of the family showing her any kind of public displays of affection, platonic or otherwise.

“Sorry, are you uncomfortable?”

“N-no. I like it. Don’t stop. Anyway, love, we should go. Aurelius is waitin’ for us.” The half-demon’s voice was quiet as they kept going.

Watching from a safe distance, Persephone laughed softly. Azalea had a reputation for being an unapproachable tough girl so to see her being so soft with a human was interesting. She wondered if she could manage to get close to his older sister and her girlfriend, she might be able to get close to Aurelius. Was it wrong to use Azalea for her own purposes? Yes, and Persephone knew that but if the letter was still a factor, she had to prove that she didn't mean him any harm.

Hurrying to school, she thought of a way to introduce herself to the girls ahead of her. What she wasn’t expecting was to bump into Azalea and fall on her face.

“Hey, watch where yer goin’!” Azalea growled as she puffed out her chest, that tough girl front making its first appearance for the day. “Ya almost knocked me over.”

“Azalea, be nice. Are you okay, Miss?”

“Sorry, I thought I had more room. I didn’t mean to bump into you and yeah, I’m alright. Thanks for asking.”

“Whatever, just make sure it don’t happen again, got it?” Azalea's blue to gold gradient eyes studied her appearance. “You go to RAD? I ain’t never seen ya around before. You new here?”

“Ah, yes. I just transferred here. Today’s my first day.” Persephone smiled as she held out her hand.

Max reached out to shake her hand and Azalea thought about stopping her but that might not be a good idea. As she regarded Persephone, an eyebrow raised slowly, remembering what her brother told her about the girl he was unsure had sent that letter.

“What’s yer name, girly? I heard about a transfer student from my brother. That you?”

Persephone’s eyes widened. He talked about her? How does she answer? Does she tell the truth or does she lie? Ultimately, the succubus nodded deciding the truth was best.

“Stay away from my brother, got it? Yer gonna regret it if I find out about ya harassin’ him. He already gets enough of that and you don’t need to addin’ to that. He’s already thinkin’ about quittin’ the one thing he loves ‘cuz of crazy fans like you.”

Max could sense that Azalea was getting more and more worked up. Before the situation could get out of hand, she grabbed her girlfriend’s hand and drug her off so she didn’t do something she’d regret later.

Well that option was out. As they walked off, Azalea turned her head back toward Persephone with a warning glare. The former idol knew now she had to set things straight. She knew what it was like to have crazy fans too.

------------------------------------------------------

Homeroom was the first class of the day, having been dropped off by his mother, Aurelius was able to get prime seating at the back of the class where the teacher could hardly see him and therefore wouldn’t call on him if they thought he wasn’t paying attention. He pulled out that letter, waiting for Persephone to show up. They were all in the same year and there was only one homeroom teacher for their year so every student in their year- advance courses included- had the same homeroom hour.

The teen watches the door with baited breath.

“I hope this is the right room.” She mumbled. When her eyes met his she looked away. They were the only two in the class room.

“Hey again.” He smiled, using his charm to his advantage. “Come here, I’d like to speak with you.” She was a little hesitant to begin with but ultimately, she decided to sit with him. “So...” Aurelius slides the letter over to her. “I want you to tell me the truth. Did you actually lie to me when we met last week? Did you really know who I was all along and still chose to lie to me?”

Persephone stared at the letter with horror. “Y-Yeah. I just didn’t want you to feel bad about knocking over a fan of yours...”

“Thought so, well thanks for thinking of my feelings. That was considerate of you. And by the look on your face, I take it you recognize what on the table.”

“I didn’t send this letter. It was forged by a dormmate of mine.” The former idol panicked about losing her one chance at getting closer to him.

“Mhm... Well, I’d believe it. And I think I know who sent it. Would you like to read it and tell me if anything in it is actually true?”

“Your sister told me you’re getting harassed.... I’m sorry you have to go through that.” she said as she nodded.

“You’ve already run in to ‘Zalea, huh? She didn’t say anything or threaten you, did she?”

“She told me to stay away from you or I’d regret it. Should I move before she gets here?”

“No don’t. I called you over here because I wanted you to sit with me. You’re going to end up with a few of my self-proclaimed ‘super fans’ nipping at your heels though. Just ignore them, alright? And if my sister tries to start anything, let me handle her.”

“Okay, also... this letter is really creepy but a couple things are true... I do have all of your issues of DevilStyle Teen and I am a big fan. But I want to get to know you. I know there’s more to a person than what you see in a magazine. Would that be alright?”

He’s surprised at this, but it was a welcome surprise. “Yeah sure. I’m kind of grounded at the moment, but we can hang out here in the morning and talk. The teacher unlocks it at 6 a.m. so meet me then. After I’m out of punishment, we can hang out outside of school too. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t interested in getting to know you as well. Also, stop trying to charm me. It’s not going to work. Like my mother, charms don’t work on me.”

The succubus blushed as she sputtered apologies and a deep embarrassed blush covered her cheeks. She hadn’t even realized she was using her powers on him- the same powers that skyrocketed her to fame as an idol.

He only chuckled at that. “If you really want to earn my affections, you’re going to have to put in the hard work.” He teased.

“G-Good to know.” She squeaked as other students began to enter and she and Aurelius began to chat casually.

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Next

Find more on my masterlist

[magaprima]

I sometimes see people talking about how they dislike the pregnancy/baby storyline, but then the reasons they give are less about personal preference or dislike, but are all about basically deciding that having a baby or being pregnant makes the woman less impressive/independent or less of a feminist idol/icon, that suddenly she’s not someone to look up to or be inspired by etc, that she’s lesser because she became a Mother. 

I mostly ignore it because I’d don’t go seeking out opinions that irritate me and engage with them, but I was thinking about it last night, because as I’ve said a wee bit back, I’ve been having reruns of Angel in the background at night (as noise for Tybalt while I’m tidying up etc), and the whole Darla only having worth while she’s pregnant and literally staking herself so the baby could live just prompted me to think about differently CAOS handled a mystical pregnancy, and how Darla’s birth scene was all about her having no worth beyond her child, literally turning herself to ash to leave a baby in her place, basically saying that that’s all she was; a baby carrier (and let’s not even get onto her whole ‘I’m a failure as a mother because I can’t even give it life’ line which insults every woman who has ever had a fucking miscarriage or stillbirth), while, conversely, Lilith’s birth scenes was one of the most empowering scenes of the entire series, where, just like Darla, the baby is dying (as is Lilith) from the pain, but instead we have women saying ‘we will share your pain, we will take on your pain together so you can survive’. It was all about women helping women, about a woman being in a terrible situation and other women doing everything to ease that suffering, and all being joined together. 

And it is possibly the most empowering birth scene, mystical or not, that I’ve ever seen on screen, and I love how the show didn’t ‘downgrade’ Lilith once she became a Mother. She was given her own story line around it, her own challenges and hurdles and grief and elations, and nothing of Lilith’s core personality or character was weakened or replaced by her being a Mother. The show didn’t say ‘motherhood is a personality trait’ (which was definitely the fucking vibe they gave with Darla), they said ‘motherhood is now another aspect of who she is’, much like it’s one of the aspects of Hecate (but I’ve gone into my love of that parallel already before), confirming and emphasising that women are more than one thing. Lilith is a witch, a demoness (well pre-Lucifer-curse anyway), a Queen, a teacher (in more ways than one), a friend, an enemy and now a Mother. None of those take away from the others, they are all part of the complicated fabric that makes Lilith who she is. 

And I love how Michelle said how powerful the birth scene was (saying it was like Mother Earth giving birth) and that she even went on to say how powerful Motherhood in general is, and that it’s the greatest force in the world, because without Mothers none of us would exist. And I love her saying that so much, and owning it, because Mothers are too often see as a downgrade in the portrayal of women, or writers set mothers to the side or have them die or always in need of being saved by their superhero-children because Mothers are apparently defenceless and get into trouble often.

Motherhood is powerful and it needs to be portrayed that way more often. 

Note: I also count Zelda as a display of motherhood as powerful, because the show makes it very clear that Zelda is maternal and loves babies, but doesn’t say ‘this makes her soft and defenceless’. And as Zelda is clearly Sabrina’s adoptive mother, she’s another character that the show displays as motherhood being an aspect and not a character trait, and that it doesn’t equal weakness. 

Even Hilda who is seen as a traditionally motherly type, very Molly Weasley in the aesthetic, is shown to be violent, dark, even manipulative. Maternal inclination is not all the women are or all they’re for in CAOS, but neither do they have to reject it to prove they’re strong. And we also have women who have no maternal inclination at all; Prudence literally despises being left with the baby, for example, and shows no desire for starting a family any time soon,but she isn’t demonised for that choice either. 

Motherhood is portrayed in CAOS as powerful and multifaceted but also not essential to a woman’s life or a judgement on her as a person either way. Also, the fact they showed how far people will go for Motherhood (Zelda kidnapping a child to protect it from a worse fate, Lilith killing a child to protect it from a worse fate as examples) was important too. I mean even Lady Blackwood, who does die in giving birth (something which I always think is decidedly point making about how Faustus did that to her by his ‘need’ for heirs. She’d had several miscarriages, never had a living child, and any doctor would say she wouldn’t be likely to survive a birth, that the strain on her health was now too much...but patriarchal need for an heir means Lady Blackwood died in the same way and for thesame reasons as so many women in history. But I digress) plans to fucking outright murder Prudence by proxy to keep her children safe from what she perceives to be a threat. 

It’s a common belief that you don’t cross a mother when it comes to their child (Mama Bear mode) and the show definitely explores that aspect too. 

And on a lighter, final note, I also love that they showed that no matter what, a new baby is exhausting...even if you’re the ancient, powerful, Mother of Demons herself, haha. 

[middleinthenight21]

Ain't that the worst thing you ever heard? Part 3

This is sad for me, It's the end

Thanks to @ravenfan1242 Without your help I could not have done this. Thank you!

If you read stay safe

"Damian Wayne has a girlfriend and she's beautiful."

"It is a pity that Bruce Wayne's son already has a partner."

’’ I ship them so much.’’

’’ Tessa Collingwood and Damian Wayne are so beautiful. God, they look so in love’’

’’ I need someone to look at me like Tessa at Damian’’

Tessa Collingwood was a British actress, mostly known for starring in teen series. Her fame exploded when she participated in a Netflix series about the rampant life of wealthy teens, the series was questionable in many ways, but it powered the careers of its stars; Tessa Collingwood accumulated more than three million followers on her accounts, being a celebrity on Instagram looking beautiful in all her photos. The actress was gorgeous with long fire-red hair, a freckled face and big blue eyes, plus an innocent smile.

The photographs circulating on the internet were taken at an auction, the youngest of the Wayne family holding a glass of champagne out to the crowd, right next to an ice sculpture in the shape of an angel with flapping wings and Tessa Collingwood looked impressive In a red dress that highlighted her hair, she was hiding a smile behind her glass. The following showed a conversation with Dick and the one who was supposed to be the manager of the actress, but the young woman was inclined as if paying attention to something Damian said and smiled.

Conner was jealous and Jaime muttered something in Spanish about the fate of some.

He rolled his eyes.

"What is she like, man?"

He frowned, he was not willing to talk about anything related to the actress, since it could be misinterpreted, especially by his colleagues, who tended to exaggerate everything and if a few simple photos could ignite all that paranoia a few words would probably make them explode. He threw his bag on the living room sofa and ignored the questions choosing to sit down.

Jaime snorted "Give us something. You are being linked to an actress and model, and you are so indifferent" He showed the actress' social networks on his cell phone, as if that cleared his mind. "It's Tessa Collingwood! She won an award for best actress in a drama series. "

He said nothing.

Donna grimaced at the ceiling, she didn’t even know who they were referring to and was thankful that there was at least one reasonable person in the room.

Superboy didn’t stop talking to Garfield about the actress and her presence at the auction, as well as reading comments together and laughing out loud when they called Damian a gentleman, but he refused to continue this conversation.

His older brother sat next to him, crossing his legs with a smirk. He nudged him "Tell them. She kept smiling at you. "

"You too? I let them take a photograph for a single event and they already mad up a silly love story", he growled. His words were tinged with rejection at the idea of all those people getting into his life. Over time, he accepted that some types of relationships are necessary, but if he considered it, it would not be in the public eye. The point was "He had to wear the scarf. "

"And Bruce would have loved it."

Damian said nothing, just grimaced and looked away. The journey from Gotham to Jump City was more tiring than he’d like to admit, plus the auction for the sculpture by Allard, an artist known for his dark style, became famous for his sculptures of smiling demons, tormented angels, and trees with sloping logs; He had been fascinated by the man's work and the details, even though people murmured how horrifying it was.

The event was slow and boring, he knew it would be, but there were responsibilities that came with being a Wayne. Commitments.

"Dick, you have to tell us," Conner insisted. "Is it true that she offered him her phone number as anonymous sources say? "

The man laughed at just imagining it and Damian crossed his arms.

Jaime looked at him as if he had done something wrong.

Garfield kept reading comments aloud and zooming in on the photos.

Troy cocked her head, processing who the actress was and why they cared so much.

Conner bombarded Dick with questions, trying to get as much information out of him as possible. He couldn't believe he considered him a friend, he's an idiot.

"I prefer cancellation."

Each one looked at him. He ignored them by focusing on removing from the packaging of the small statues he bought at the auction, as well as a handwritten book by an anonymous ancient Arab poet., The piece was valued at less than a million dollars and how millionaires are of unknown origin. They had nothing to brag about, but Damian found a value for it, perhaps because he is also an Arab, perhaps because people are stupid, especially those with more superficial money.

His older brother gave him a sideways glance.

"What? " He asked defensively. He put everything heshe bought in his bag, taking care that it was kept in perfect order.

"You've been reading a lot lately."

"Is there something wrong with that?"

He raised his hands, as if stopping an invisible attack.

"No, I didn't mean that, Damian." He shook his head. He put a finger on his chin thoughtfully. "It is just that I have seen you with at least two books in the week. Three days ago, I saw you reading Lovecraft, then Whose Body? or whatever ... "

Garfield looked up from his phone and watched him.

"Who, darling?"

Kory stroked Dick's chest from behind, pressing her chin against the hero's shoulder. Damian pulled away, despising the show of affection from the apparent team leaders, and the entire team made excuses to go elsewhere.

"I have to go bathe with my tongue." Garfield disappeared down the hallways.

The couple laughed. It seemed that they lived in a sugary bubble when they are together, all the time they touch each other and smile every time their eyes connect, once the caresses begin, they do not stop and they are not shy at all ... Damian has bad memories of this.

He left.

He just wanted his bed. After finding his face on the internet and what's on the fingers of so many people who just want to get involved in the gossip of the moment, he wanted to train, use his time productively.

Preparation is a prerequisite for victory.

And he's always ready, but he just wants to sleep.

For some reason, he can't help but start reading this book. That baffles him.

When passing through the kitchen a person is sitting eating a cereal bar and holding a coffee with a pungent chocolate aroma. She keeps a book over her face, covers her expressions and is dressed completely in dark tones., She had on a sweatshirt that is triple her size and one shoulder is exposed, he could only see a vestige of some shorts , since they disappeared in the long sweatshirt and thick stockings.

Her foot moved to the rhythm of an imperceptible melody and her hair was tied back in a high ponytail, leaving strands at the nape of her neck.

She turned the page "If you stay longer there, I will consider you as a stalker, what do you want?"

"And they say I'm rude."

Raven looked up. Her eyes narrowed when she saw him standing at the door, he was not surprised that she did not look excited, since the girl rarely showed her emotions and he was grateful for that. After coming from an event surrounded by teenagers who sighed ion his face, daughters of mayors, granddaughters of businessmen, actresses, models and influencers who took pictures of him on his social networks without asking for his permission.

He had considered suing, but Dick found it unnecessary and his father kept speculating with Selina about the possibility that a black-market gang would steal the pieces. Bruce thinks they collaborate with the Penguin, but he doesn't count them until they arrive.

The best detective in the world.

She puts the book down, but reluctantly does it "Sorry. I thought it was Garfield or Conner. " He bit down on the cereal bar, keeping an eye on Damian. "So, what happened? "

He frowned.

Raven watched him.

She is empathetic, he reminded himself. Sometimes he overlooked that detail, this was one of her powers, that does not make it more tolerable, he did not like that people would look below his appearance; It felt like an invasion of his privacy, it doesn't feel right, but he can't get mad at Raven for knowing too much.

Supreme warriors like us never give the enemy a chance to defeat us, not when it comes to emotions or appealing to feelings. We must get rid of them to rule the world, Ra's Al Ghul was clear. You cannot guide them to a better world, being equal to them.

You will not be useful to me, just as you are.

He pushed Talia and Ra's voice away, as if shaking the dust off.

He sat across from Raven. He watched her silently taking small sips of her coffee, when he met her he believed that she was a person drinking bitter espresso, but she has an insane inclination towards sweets of all kinds; she went to that little sweet shop on Riva Street where they prepare artisan cotton candy and bought those colored candies that she keeps in her pockets, like an amulet.

Damian grimaced when she added a spoon of cream to her coffee and licked what remained on the kitchen utensil. Pennyworth would disapprove of her behavior; he can almost hear the scolding in his head.

"Nothing. "

For a few seconds he struggles to remember her question. If this happened to him in the mansion, his older brothers would mock his face, and he grimaced.

After a weekend at Wayne Mansion living with his brothers and Helena, he was fortunate to be back with the Titans - his thirteen-year-old version would hit him in the face - but his little sister is loud, shaking her fists in the air and she opens her mouth as much as she can, claiming attention only for her, the noise of his brothers adds to it, that combination almost drover him crazy.

He doesn't want to talk about the auction.

"Look." She pulled a package out of her pockets. He raises an eyebrow, because he doesn't think it's anything special. "Son ghraybeh" she tried to pronounce. Raven lowers her voice, like she does when she's admitting something, she doesn't want anyone to hear. "I bought them in an Arab store. "

Damian analyzes one of the cookies. In his childhood in Tibet he had seen these biscuits in the markets of the nearby towns, the masses had almonds, pistachios and all kinds of nuts, but he had never tried them.

He bit into it. The sweet has a bitter flavor charged by spices, it’s an explosion in his mouth and he’s almost transported to those stores, to women covered by hijabs and  it reminds him of the music his grandfather listened to during dinners, Of burnt incense, the blue hyacinth that grows as a weed and the Dragon Blood tree that rested in the garden that was extremely cared for, his grandfather had said that it is as old as he is and it’s sap is the color of blood.

Raven smiled, she bit into one of the cookies herself while drinking coffee.

He is not surprised that she had visited Arab stores, since in her spare time she visited bakeries, and that bookstore where the owner recommended novels and would have a reserved seat in the Costa restaurant while reading a book, as well as the ice cream parlor hidden among the luxury stores .

She tried foreign dishes, does not despise any genre of novels and is shocked by the arts. He supposed it was due to her time in hell, but deep down it's more than that; Raven is someone who leaves memories between those streets, measures people's energy and how they impact places. At first, he thought that her powers focused more on magic, such as enchantments, potions and spells, but she is more focused on emotions and feelings, she is different from Zatanna or Constantine.

"Is it true that the Belmont Allard sculptures were being auctioned?"

He set the cookie aside by making a mental note to finish it longer.

"I should have known that you were interested in his works."

Raven rolled her eyes, glancing at her book, her eyes scanning the page, and was drawn to whatever she now has on her reading list. She was quiet, reserved, and would rather sit in the back than walk in the front, but she should not be underestimated, and Damian had seen her vanquishing godlike humans and demons, yet she has a gentle aura. It is difficult to explain.

"Allard is famous. It has a history related to Satan, it is full of treasons, witches and enrichment overnight. "

She Mocked "Typical of pacts with the devil. "

Despite her mocking tone the truth slips.

Damian pulls out the book he bought, it's not flashy, it's dirty and worn. It smells of dust and dry ink, lined by a thick cloth of a dull red hue, it has damp spots and folded corners.

She says nothing but he sees the interest in her eyes.

"It is from an anonymous poet. It is of Arab origin; historians say that the book dates from 750. approximately, which corresponds to the times of an Iranian revolution" explained. "They assume that the author is a wealthy man because of the references to luxury and the elaboration of the work, but they are not sure. "

She stared at the book. He let her analyze it, but she frowned as she turned the pages and her mouth twisted into a grimace, like she was annoyed.

"What's wrong? "

"The book transmits strong feelings" her eyes shine, and she continues turning the pages. Damian raises an eyebrow, waiting for a clearer answer. "It brings me a feeling of longing; it is as if the author had misplaced something or someone" she closed the book. "It's amazing, I never felt this coming from an object" she leaves it.

He frowned.

It doesn't seem like a danger to him.

"Also, I can't read it."

He rolled his eyes.

Almost on impulse he opened any page of the book. The leaves are of a yellowish tone, with the corners eaten by humidity and the poet's pen is small and light, a scribble made of ink that in some places is smeared and he is surprised by the content of the letters.

"What does it say? "

He read in a loud voice. His voice was released, his mother tongue slides through his tongue and it is simple, after speaking English for so long it is even relaxing to speak Arabic, but she was puzzled and confused by his words, she was even happy that she does not understand what he is saying. Despite knowing the language, the words feel foreign.

                                                                                            عظامي المحطمه تتصلح

                                                                                      مع كل تلك الليالي التي قضاينها

                                                                                حبك سر آمل احلم اموت لحفاظ عليه

                                                                                                    التغير من اولوياتي

Despite everything, he prefers that she be the one who listened to him. Damian realizes she is comfortable; he feels domestic and that makes him reconsider what he just did.

The girl bows her head and frowns, she didn’t understand what he just said and struggles to try to associate the words, but the English and Arabic languages ​​are opposite. Raven rests her head on her hand.

"What does it mean? "

Damian Wayne does not make these kinds of mistakes, his grandfather would subject him to abysmal punishment and his mother would slap him in the face, even his father would growl, but the answer is said before he can avoid it.

The translation is simple for him, a custom that he acquired over the years.

"My broken bones are healing with all these nights we spend. Your love is a secret that I am waiting, dreaming, dying to keep" responds. "You change my priorities. "

He looks her in the eye. Her eyes are like the purple tanzanite, a precious stone that Ra´s Al Ghul kept around his finger in a ring, a symbol of his status and power against his enemies; in the end it did no good, even the most powerful person in the world and his kingdom had fallen. Ra´s Al Ghul was no different than Julius Caesar, Tarquin, Darius I, Napoleon or Hitler and what they built.

Now he understood that the stone on his grandfather was a sample, a shell to inspire fear; Tanzania is extremely rare and expensive, its color was a boost to make it so coveted, and it seems imprinted in Raven's eyes.

He is aware of the level of communication they have; words are not necessary. Damian would have turned away, walked away and ignored her presence, he did not like that anyone felt familiar with him., He is a warrior not a sentimental teenager, but after the last few months he had been alone, nobody talked to him apart from matters involving the missions, he couldn't help but measure his actions and keep an eye on anyone who was around, it could be a stalker, maybe a person who hates him, or someone interested in selling a photograph to a magazine.

Damian preferred solitude, he exiled himself while the media storm passed over his head. Long ago he would not have cared, the Titans many times represented being a nuisance, they were open to anyone who told a sad story without caring about their past, but the weight of the distance began to haunt him.

He understood the nature of his character, how difficult it is to establish relationships, and the approach is difficult to deal with. Damian was extremely professional at best, concerned with realistic aspects and devised plans based on data, measured his peers and analyzed each and every action, judged and issued verdicts, disliked being touched by anyone and growled with his words to anyone who treated him like a child to be protected.

What before seemed to him aspects that should be highlighted now are the reasons why he is so hated.

He realized that his skills are a mattress; He was not welcome in many places, many heroes had complained about him and insulted him to his face, but they recognized how good a fighter and excellent strategist he is, not for nothing he is the son of Batman and the heir to the League of Shadows, and that does not mean anything. People on the internet didn't care who he was, what he accomplished, or what his story was. They hate him for the pictures, videos, and comments, and he couldn't do anything. It's tiring sometimes, when people decide to subject you to rejection and there is nothing to do to correct that.

They besieged his castle, forced him to close the gates of the kingdom.

He may not need third-party approval when criminals were loose on the streets, but it doesn't make it more tolerable.

His father told him of the harassment he would receive when he was recognized as the son of Bruce Wayne, but his home was snatched away, burned from head to foot and he had to create a new belief system out of thin air, he wanted to feel like he belonged somewhere. Bruce was right.

His privacy was stolen, he found his face on the covers of youth magazines and invented relationships with strangers based on nothing, he committed innocent people to address him and he does not want to live like this. He hates other people getting into his life, he doesn't have to explain to anyone, or hide, but Damian does.

I despised help, as well as apologies and looks of pity from others.

Raven was silent, and did not push him away when it appeared, she doesn't not care about the cancellation or how the Internet saw the next heir to the Wayne fortune. It was silent, private and intimate.

It is not dependency, it is not attachment based on loneliness or trauma, he doesn't even know where to catalog it. Raven had a breakup recently, although he knew that she is now friendly, that had affected her and he was canceled, tried and sentenced to global rejection, while his civilian identity was compromised, it is not a good combination.

She gulps and looks away. His hands tremble around his book and he almost see her shudder.

Damian stirs uncomfortably and insecure, he wants ...

"Tessa Collingwood talked about you!"

The entire group entered. Kory had ordered food from a local restaurant, and the rest just argued around the news on Garfield's phone, as if this was a gathering of old ladies arguing about the life of a misbehaving neighbor.

Raven raises an eyebrow "The actress? "

Jaime nods.

"She mentioned Damian in one of her stories," Garfield replied. Donna laughed at something, and Conner grimaced rereading the screen. "She said:’’ Me and Damian are just friends.’’

Kory smiled.

"I doubt I was friends with someone I saw only once." He crosses his arms. Looked at the Titans. "In fact, I have known certain people for years and doubt that I would include them on my list. "

Jaime rolled his eyes.

 "Do you have a friendship list? Dude, that's absurd."

Conner nods looking at the green teenager, while Donna decided that the adult conversation is more interesting.

"Anyway, this beautiful actress mentioned you."

He hit the table with his book, attracting everyone's attention. "I don't care what it has to do with her." He turned around. "I will be in my room."

Someone called him, it was Raven ...

He stopped, standing at the door with his fists clenched.

He looked at her, while she held the book in her hands and smiled, just a little, as if she had heard an internal joke that only she knew. He had left the book.

So, everything was very clear and he's an idiot because he hadn’t seen it before.

*** 

Raven was lost.

Completely lost.

Alone and confused in her room, wandering from place to place like a caged lion. She wanted to demand answers, she felt like she was about to go crazy, and it is as if it is slowly killing her, she tries to fight, but she loses the fight as soon as it begins.

She compared this sensation with the previous ones; Raven had experienced love, the one that hurts your heart, the one you justify when you are hurt and you throw yourself into the void, with your blindfold you stumble over stones and ignore the blows, but this is different; born of intimacy, like a secret that grows until it is difficult to maintain.

She had to know.

Oh, Azarath.

She never learns from her mistakes.

Now she talks to everyone except him.

When surrounded by her peers it's easy to keep up, she just focuses on the cakes Kory brought, Donna's fighting techniques she hones in the training room, she even prefers her father's voice in her head to pay attention to her.

If she bleeds, if she hurts not to have it, she would never tell him.

Your love is a secret that I am waiting, dreaming, dying to keep.

Damn the poems of unknown Arab authors.

Raven wants to bury her feelings; burn his perfect face and the dimple rarely shows to others. Maybe he's aware of his own charm and she did something that bothered him, and he's only taking revenge on Raven in the worst way, Damian was vindictive and…

This is ridiculous.

I'm going to kill that boy, witch. You are a whore girl.

She makes a gesture to turn away her father's voice, but he doesn't shut up and she doesn't care.

She is so disoriented, she lives anchored to him like a bird in her blue sky and she has no way to kick him out of her life, she just doesn't want to. She is not selfish, she would never put her desires or her integrity over that of others, but she hates it because she could not have him in her life without compromising their friendship, the level of confidence they have and that feeling of home when they are going through difficult times.

Home is the place where, when you have to go there, they have to take you in.

Now it had taken on a new meaning. There are people who went through her life, were transitory, arrived at a specific moment and continued on, like nomads who left a lost object, and those who stay and fight by her side, accept her without expecting anything in return, they are important, they are family. However, there are others that transcend to the next level, they are like home, places shout their names and even everyday aspects seem valuable.

Raven does not want to despise this, but she is not going to ruin it by confessing her feelings, she felt like a schoolgirl who jumped when she saw the boy and hid in the corners.

Someone knocks on the door and opens it, she discovers Damian's serious face, frowning and holding two coffees. The first rays of the sun illuminate his face, as if blessing his soul and highlighting his tanned skin, and for a few seconds it seems that he knows.

"Good Morning. "

She steps aside, letting him pass. Her voice is monotonous, tired and she considers for a few seconds not to let him in, but it is too late.

Everything seems to be pulling towards him, as if he possessed a magnetic field and was a magnet. This morning he was not wearing his uniform, but a simple plain t-shirt in pastel blue and dark jeans and Nike sneakers, he squares his eyes like when preparing for battle or listening to something or someone who he does not like.

From here she perceives that he is having an internal struggle.

He leaves the coffee glasses on a small piece of furniture and stands in front of the window with his arms crossed behind his back.

"Is Something wrong? "

Hearing a bark and opening the door, Titus enters the room going upstairs to his house licking the pillows and spinning on the mattress. With Damian he was disciplined, obedient, surprisingly submissive, but when Raven is around, she allows him to be playful and mischievous, as if he had never become an adult animal.

Damian had scolded her for being permissive, but in her mind, he was never going to stop being that puppy she gave away inside that box. The animal had been scared, lost and away from his brothers, he trembled when a person approached, and she seemed to see her friend in the animal in a strange way.

Titus was shy and fearful when he arrived. Little by little he emerged from his cocoon to become a loyal and courageous Great Dane.

He didn't challenge him for messing up the bed like he normally would, so she started to worry. She didn't feel anything and that was frustrating, it was easy for Raven to understand people through her magic, although she didn't like what was underneath, but he only let her see what he allowed.

"What wrong? " She asked again.

"People have spoken again. "

Raven grimaced "Is it because of the actress? "

He turned his back on her and the young woman sat on the ground, partly so as not to disturb Titus, to have a better view, partly because she felt closer.

He was still flat, like a soft wave on a lake, and that is not all; it's just the outside.

"A little." He paused. "People hate Robin, people love what Damian Wayne stands for" His face is reflected in the window glass, he is impartial, and he keeps that scowl that characterizes him. "I do not care. My father says that the press is like vultures, but sometimes they are noisy. "

She cannot relate to that.

Raven enjoyed anonymity, she may be a consecrated heroine, and has a couple of victories on her record; people do not stop to talk about her private life, but are interested in the source of her power, her dark and quiet nature, they build and destroy theories, but nothing else.

She was a favorite on YouTube and blog channels focused on mysteries, conspiracy theories, and the paranormal.

She can't imagine what media persecution is, online harassment and what it means to have so many people eager to know about your life, that drove celebrities crazy all the time, some fell into addictions to flee their problems, those who survived cruelly understood the boundary between professional and personal, marked the line and took refuge in their homes, as if they lived in a fortress. Robin was a global trend in social networks, it required many people to achieve this.

Damian had stayed away, holding on to his training and lifting his chin as high as possible, but she knew him; with him not everything is said, it is not what is shown.

"Damian" she calls him because she knows his thoughts are strong right now. She reached for the coffee. She appreciated the warmth of the drink in her hands, it feels real. "It´s okay" she smiled.

He looks at her.

She had never seen that shade of green before. He may not realize his own charm; his face reflected the golden rays, and his dark hair shone in a lighter shade.

Titus now sleeps in bed and his snoring is deep.

He sits next to her in the lotus position and they watch the sunrise together. They do not say anything, they do not speak much, both are people who were touched by tragedy, who face battles while forging their way to adulthood and are not used to expressing their feelings, interpreting silences and supporting each other from a distance with small gestures.

She wants to have better words, be more forthcoming, and offer advice, so they could talk more about his breakdowns. Raven would cleanse his heart if that helps his heartbeat, a word and it would be his.

Damian takes her hand.

His fingers are barely touching, his skin is hard, and that scar that ran like a thick rope over his knuckles is soft to the touch; his fingers are long and shiver, as if cold, but he remains in place; she compares it to a burn and is surprised.

Raven wants to hold onto him, because he doesn't deserve all the hatred, they chase him with torches and spears. She wants to tell him that she regrets him for his past, for all the manipulation, because there was no one to show him love and treat him like a child, who sees him as a person during his childhood and she wants to smooth his wrinkles that were beyond the ones visible. She wants to show the affection that was denied him all his life and tell him that she does not care what they call him on the internet- Either as Robin or Damian Wayne- Deep down, he is only a kind and generous soul, and she is fortunate to see it, even if he is insufferable.

She squeezed his hand. Words are not necessary.

He keeps his gaze on the dawn. His eyebrows tremble and he showed his emotions for the first time, it is like the caress of the wind of a summer night.

Silence.

They are like little children who take too much importance on their clasped hands. There is no lust, nor the typical approach to achieve something, they are two people who are used to being alone, pushing everyone away, seeing the worst in people and being disappointed, betrayed and disheartened, clinging to the other; it is so simple and complex.

He leans his head against hers and leaves it.

At first, she is surprised, but she thinks he is like a scared animal that would walk away in the face of any foreign sound or reaction. It is beautiful, vulnerable and serene, like a new dawn.

Aware of his exhaustion and frustration, this simple action reflects the fatigue of all these months of witch hunting, keeping quiet and holding on his own, she can feel him letting go of his burdens and that mask of indifference is shattered.

Her hair is soft, and his shoulder bumps into hers; He is taller, and his muscles are worked by constant exercise and his breath tastes like coffee.

The scent of shaving lotion reaches her nose, she was aware of that smell and it was masculine, it had a woody touch and she was relaxing.

Can they stay like this forever? In the silence and secrecy of her room with their hands clasped and leaning on the other drinking coffee from plastic cups ...

... And suddenly, this is enough.

*** 

Raven bought a dress.

That night is hot, and they visit an open bar on the seashore. The music is relaxed, the musicians play bass drums and ukuleles, giving the place a tropical atmosphere; decorated by lights and all the tables and chairs are made of wood, with small floral decorations as centers.

The sound of ocean waves and salty-smelling air was sleepy, almost as if slowly inducing her to sleep.

Kory forced them into a night of mandatory fun, booked a table in a corner under a palm tree, would give them a little privacy, and they wouldn't get as much attention. She sensed that in the place photographs were not allowed was a factor for her to choose it.

The tradition of compulsory fun was installed with the arrival of Damian, she was left justifying small getaways or celebrations of birthdays, anniversaries, certain days of the year.

Raven thanked the team leader- who she considers to be an older sister- since the bar is not very crowded nor does it allow crowds with all those people sweating under the influence of alcohol, but the place is familiar, spacious and quiet. Her powers would not overwhelm her.

"Honey, will you bring us our drinks?"

Dick nods walking towards the bar. The man was wearing a simple T-shirt and shorts, on the other hand, his fiancée looked glamorous in the purple dress with large openings revealing her shapely legs and a plunging neckline.

Garfield, Conner, and Jaime share a conversation with Donna about the dance, but the young woman only frowns when she looks at the musicians.

"It's Latin music. "

Jaime snorts "Don't look at me, dude. Just because I'm Latino does not mean I know how to dance. "

"I'm not the best dancer anymore." Garfield looks with a grudge at Damian, who grimaces looking away.

"I just beat you."

"You break codes and all that, surely you did it with the dance machine. "

Raven snorts, but she's amused.

"That was a long time ago." He looked at everyone. "Can we get over it? "

When Dick arrived he announced that he asked for drinks for each one, but they had a limit of two, because some recently stopped being minors, also in the tower they had rules and arriving drunk is on the prohibited list; for those who are minors there are unlimited juices.

The night is progressing normally, although she sees certain people who are surprised by her colorful group, nobody really cares. They are just a group of friends enjoying an evening by the ocean.

Damian rolls his eyes when Dick starts Kory dancing with a slow song.

"They've been dating for years."

Raven raises her eyebrows, not at all surprised. She already knew.

"I mean long before they became teammates." He gives his whisky a small sip. "When he was a boy, he kept having suggestive calls with her." He shrugs.

"No way! " Conner leans in and opens his mouth.

Jaime contains a laugh.

"Are you seriously surprised?" She didn’t need to be empathetic to know that.

They look at her, but it's Garfield who speaks first.

"Did you know?! " He shakes his head. "Of course, you knew, why didn't you tell me?! "

"I did not mean that. "

"Traci arrived!" Jaime gets up from the table and disappears.

After two years together he is still excited to see her enter the room, Raven got along with the girl, she is pleasant and has a pink aura, used to loving and showing it, she also has Jaime around her fingers.

Raven drinks her gin and tonic, the drink is incredibly sweet and fruity. Her friends raised an eyebrow at seeing her bite into the lemon wedge that decorates the drink, but it's not that she cares, it's probably because she's going for her second fruit drink and sweet alcoholic drinks are misleading.

A boy appears pushed by his group of friends, who laugh giving him sidelong glances and extends one of his hands to dance, he is tall, and his face is youthful, perhaps just after finishing high school. His emotions are strong too, but the one that predominates is lust, she has a moment when images of herself come of kissing him in the dark.

He has too much imagination.

"Would you like to dance? "

She shakes his head, absorbing the lemon juice to the last drop. The scene almost seems funny to her, this boy asking her to dance in front of her friends, among them her ex-partner is present, along with the young man who answered the name of her best friend, who also has feelings. It is funny.

A smile glides across her lips.

The boy stirs uncomfortably without knowing how to interpret her smile, but she continues to shake her head, so he leaves.

"You have low tolerance, Roth."

Raven grimaces "It will pass soon. Alcohol will be in my system for exactly forty minutes and then I'll be like new. "

She calls a waiter asking for a Cuban mojito with that sugar-covered rim she likes so much.

When the drink is put in front of her, it is just as promised and she almost sighs when she sees it. Damian drops his drink, gives her a disapproving look with those green eyes, and she could cry right now because she thinks it's cruel and insane to be around him.

Conner invites his friends to dance wanting to flee from the discomfort. The others continue to join the small group that formed in the middle of the dance floor, Kory and Dick get all eyes, they move well.

Raven sips the drink through the straw. The little umbrella is a hindrance, so she pushes it aside noticing how her fingers tremble, the sugar and the drink mix is ​​not a good match.

Damian approaches, but she moves away.

She should think twice before entering his space.

Raven looks him in the eye. Noting that his expression reflects concern, just as he was ready to scold her, she knows that scowl and he has that plain short-sleeved shirt with the designer's name she can't pronounce and some worn jeans; For someone with so much money, he have not invested too much in his clothing.

His eyes are green as a drink, and he raises an eyebrow. His features are a mix between the Middle East and the West, his Arabic accent is light, as if he had always spoken English and he moves his fingers on the wooden table; remember that morning when their hands touched.

She wants to cry.

"It's not fair."

It's not fair that he so perfect, while she was melting away for keeping her secret just to keep him within her life. It's not fair!

She doesn't want him as her best friend.

He is a magnetic force in the form of a man.

She is attracted to him. It is not a fairy tale, it is not idolatry, just esteem it, the past seems to have been erased by a rubber when they were together, and she is dying to have him.

Random, she's so angry.

Damian grimaces "are you okay? "

"I'm fine. "

That’s a lie.

 "Let's go," he says, taking her by the forearm before she finished her drink and takes her to the parking lot without asking. He opens the door of his car, sitting her in the back seat. "Try to get comfortable" He sits down on the pilot's seat and starts the car.

She really wanted to stay.

She rests her head against the headboard and looks out. The highway is fast and distinguishes trees and pieces of the ocean illuminated by a moon.

The lights are off, and there is no music.

She lies down in the back seat.

It smells of leather and that forest fragrance, just like his lotion.

Suddenly the tears slide down her eyes, they are thin. She is angry with herself for being weak, with him and for the life that kept hitting her, a few weeks ago she had been convinced that she is much better alone, lives well and recovers from a breakup, she is not missing anything, then he entered little by little to her life and she wants to push him away, now she just wants him to stay a little longer. A little bit closer.

Raven wants to see what's underneath that bad boy attitude.

He sees her in the rearview mirror "what's wrong with you? "

"Nothing," she says in a broken voice.

Damian raises an eyebrow. Maybe he doesn't care, maybe he's worried she will throw up in his expensive car or she pretends that she cares just so he doesn't make her feel bad.

What doesn't kill her makes her want him more.

He tilts his head she and sees that sharp scar in the corner of his chin catch the silver glow of the moon. This is horrible.

"It's not important what you're upset about."

What?

Damian, the worst adviser in the world.

Yes it is important because it would destroy everything, they would end the reading of books on the roof, visits to Riva street where they would chat in the book store, the shared cafes in their room when they feel too lazy to go up or the weather is not favorable for them and the way he smiles marking that dimple on his cheek, how he held her hand and leaned his head against her. She thinks that if she lost him, she wouldn't do those things again.

Her heart breaks.

She would never walk down Riva Street again.

It is her fault.

It is his fault.

She imagines reading Robert Frost alone knowing he didn't love her, she would visit Riva Street trying to meet again, she would finish the cafes on the floor of her room because she is dumb enough to confess. Damian wouldn't worry about love affairs, he has a purpose and it would be a distraction, a stone in his shoe, he had better judgment, therefore he would walk away first.

He would not give her second glances; in fact, he would despise her for ruining their friendship.

It terrifies her too much.

She cries like a baby in the back of the car.

When they park in front of the tower of the Titans, she does not think twice and opens the door running into the forest that surrounds the home of the young heroes, entering it as if he were chasing her. She can hear the car's engine go off, as well as his desperate call, then the footsteps.

Raven takes off her shoes.

Thanks for the lightness of her dress. She thinks about going through the back door of the tower and locking herself in her room, tomorrow she could say that she was drunk and was not thinking clearly, but now she needs to be alone.

Maybe she deserves it.

She is running barefoot through the woods with her dress catching leaves and branches, just as her hair is now a wind-tossed mess. The moon is a fuzzy point between the treetops and the warm weather does not help.

She runs a hand down her face, ridding herself of the tears that were running down her cheeks.

"Raven!"

She is not a runner, so she is caught by arms before she could open a portal to her room, another country or dimension, she really doesn't know for sure. There are three uncertain options.

Damian pushes her away, looking her in the eye.

"What's wrong? You ran away, the car was moving, Raven."

His hands go up and down her shoulders to her arms, giving her warmth. Then she realizes that she is trembling, like a scared puppy and she is a total disaster.

She wanted to escape to close her fate, because she deserves to be alone and having him close is her own personal torture.

Damian had come to her in moments of vulnerability, when no one was looking, he trusted her more than anyone, he was harassed and hated by people. Damian Wayne was easily associated with actresses, models and celebrities, they took his privacy without his consent, everyone hated or loved a version of him.

He showed her his true self and she paid him by falling in love with him.

He had driven her crazy, begging him to knock on her door or end it all.

It would destroy years of friendship and companionship.

Raven got out of a relationship, that's not how it was supposed to go, she hadn't looked for it.

He looks her in the eye, as if waiting for her to tell him the devastating ending of a novel. He is so close that his mint breath almost makes the tide, his hands are warm as the desert and she has to look away so as not to be consumed.

Her heart beats painfully in her chest.

She ruined her life for not being his.

She wants so much and that is hurting her.

"Tell me."

She digs her feet into the ground, her toes touch the ground and the dry leaves. This is real.

Suddenly, she is angry with everyone and everything.

Tell him! A voice rolled her, almost crying. You're going to ruin everything, says another with resignation.

However, something inside her asks for more, she wants to have him closer and her hands tremble wanting to interlock their fingers; it is as if a spirit had possessed her body and made her ambitious and selfish.

She feels her heart breaking.

Wanting it is bad. Damian doesn't deserve this, but ...

Now or never.

She shouts: "I love you! Ain't that the worst thing you ever heard?"

Time is frozen, like dead. Everything stops.

Damian is silent.

She swallows and clenches her jaw.

She wants to cry.

She has ruined everything.

But he looks up and smiles like a devil.

***

The lights are off when they reach her room, Titus is playing with her sheets and there is disorder.

She stands still, not knowing what to do.

The moonlight is bluish, almost blinding them and everything is silent. The door to her room is open, the kitchen light is dim and she listens to a tune in the distance, she thinks it's the radio that Kory always leaves on.

The tension could be cut by a knife, but it is different.

Raven has passed the effect of alcohol and knows that she has done something that is irreparable, but she couldn't care less, because he smiled and held her hand gently; Damian dropped the costumes a bit, sheltering his feelings and emotions as heshe had been taught all his life, just for her. Nobody else.

He is standing at the door.

He looks her in the eye and there is an unspoken agreement between the two.

Close the door.

Raven is an awkward mess, it will take days for her emotions to normalize, but this time she allows her stomach to spin, her hands to stay inert at the sides of her torso without knowing which position to adapt, and her brain short-circuiting.

All roads had led her to this moment.

Feeling their fear and how confused they are, none are used to showing affection unless someone loves them, but they try. She stands firm.

Damian says nothing when he approaches, he takes her hand gently interlacing his fingers, it is like fire and ice, two forces that collide. It is something so every day, but with him it is as if he left a mark that she cannot erase.

He presses their foreheads and she sigh.

She had been a hawthorn tree for a long time, but now she may be a rose.

He caresses her face, the pads of his fingers running down her forehead, her cheeks up to her neck. It is pure, there is longing and affection, he will not tell her that he loves her too, but the gentleness and innocence of the act is enough to let her breathe out, because they do not need to speak, nor do they require speeches. Love can be declared to anyone, castles are built on the sand with ease only from confessions based on nothing, but demonstrating it is something else.

Raven kisses him on the cheek, presses her lips against the skin, and the fingers he keeps on her neck tremble. His breathing is ragged, as if he was agitated; they were both so lonely, apprehensive, and fearful that this bubble was an illusion.

They cannot make promises now because this is running a thread.

Darkness surrounds them, like a blanket on this summer night. There is no one in the tower, everyone stayed at the bar and they only heard Titus's playful grunts.

Her hands go up his chest and go to the nape. They take it easy, adapting to being this close, and trying not to get the blow too strong to leave them in shock.

She presses her forehead against his cheek.

Her father's voice is strong and threatening, but she contains a smile because it is so ridiculous and funny.

"What does he say? " He whispers.

She looked him in the eyes "My father wants to kill you. "

Damian frowns "And me to him. "

Raven laughs, a loud, clear laugh; she shares his feelings about her father.

"I will have a good relationship with your father," he says sarcastically. His voice is light and attracts her, like bees to honey. "It would be a shame if you spend time with me. "

"It would be," she whispers.

He brushes back a lock of her hair, pressing both hands to her cheeks. He kisses her cheek lightly with the touch of a butterfly and sighs, almost instinctively closes his eyes and kisses her on the corner of her lips, they are like school children experiencing romance.

When they finally kiss, it is soft and delicate.

She has to lean on him not to slip, and her heart trembles with joy, because she has what she wanted for so long. She doesn't know when they crossed the line, when she started having feelings for him, it felt like a thousand years ago.

She in a safe place, she feels like she been waiting a long time to find something like that. This is the kind of love that time does not heal, that makes you sigh and beg for more.

She would ask him to please stay.

In the past she believed that love is painful, that it steals things from you and runs away, like a criminal, but it is more than that.

Kissing in the dark, limbs trembling and hearts pounding, praying this doesn't end. They are a blank page on a desk, which is filled as they go.

Raven strokes his hair, and feels his breath catch.

They stay there and Titus jumps around her, barking and expressing enthusiasm; he is the only thing in the room that is moving.

He kisses her again. This time it is safe, the kiss is slow, and he seems to want to savor this moment and her legs tremble.

His breath is slightly bitter, like whisky, and her lips are ice cold in the drink. It is an interesting contrast to his warm skin to the touch and she realizes how much she wanted to feel each of his scars, she wanted to perceive what his skin is like and the lights change the color of his green eyes, she wants to know what is under his clothes, count his freckles, moles, wounds and scars.

One of the straps of her dress falls from her shoulder.

Her body is new to him, and she is more than willing to get used to it.

Let him have everything; her heart, her body and soul.

*** 

Damian and Raven talk and agree to have their relationship private.

In front of the titans they are companions, they get along well, but it is not that they revolve around each other, in fact, they hardly speak if it is not for the missions. They try to separate the professional from the personal, they would have nothing in front of the others, but they look in private corners. No one knows what is between them.

They do well.

Damian has already been exposed to the media, they had gotten into his life and he was hated by everyone for his attitudes like Robin, but when they are together that does not matter. All the drama queens and the noisy ones muffle their voices and the statements of celebrities approaching him lose their meaning.

He doesn't care what is said in the tabloids.

He thinks the Titans are suspicious, but not that there was enough evidence, and none are willing to answer the questions or pay attention to suspicious glances. Nobody asks Damian, but his brothers are an exception, after all, they didn't learn from the best detective in the world for nothing and sometimes he thinks it's a curse to surround himself with his family.

He thinks Alfred and his father know but ignores them.

They are not a sentimental couple, nor do they go out too much, only on missions or compulsory fun dates, to walk in the park with Titus, although they rarely go together, since they fear finding the photos on the internet; they prefer to be in the room, have breakfast on the roof of the tower, lie next to each other without speaking, they could read together or hold hands and Damian prefers to enjoy her company when no one is around, She is surprised when she feels light waking up by his side in the morning or by entering her room after a mission.

Damian walks to her room with Titus following in his footsteps.

He goes through the room where the group watches a movie, Raven is not there, so she assumes that she must be in her room probably because they are watching a horror movie and it is not that the girl is a fan of horror movies that include Blood and uncensored deaths, the group barely notices as they are thrilled by the butter knife murder scene.

He opens the door and is surprised.

She is reading in his bed, wearing a shirt that she stole from his closet and never returned, and shorts made from gray fabric. Now she wears a plain Dolce and Gabanna shirt for sleep, as if the designer's brand was nothing.

Her short hair is strewn across the pillow and she is focused on the letters in that book.

Titus jumps onto the bed, licking the girl's face, she suppresses a smile, and looks up to see him lock the door securely.

She pet the dog "Hi. "

He quietly walks over to his computer, pulling a document Drake had sent him out of the recycle bin that contained a report with a couple of errors. His father instructed him to correct the mistakes since his brother had overdosed on coffee or something.

she is probably feeling his apprehension.

From his bag where she carries his pet's leash, water bottles, the muzzle and a part of towels, she extracts a cotton candy wrapped in a plastic bag, it looks like a pink cloud.

When he saw the vendor in the park, he remembered how she had that insane obsession with sweets and his mind began to associate her with caramel, soft and extremely sugary flavors. Sometimes he doesn't understand how she can tolerate eating a whole cotton candy.

She smiles at him and takes it in her hands. He sits on the bed, and she spreads her feet using his lap to support them; Damian looks down as if asking why he did that, but he just lets it go.

Raven eats the cotton candy, while smiling as she tries to push the dog away. Finally, the animal licks her fingers absorbing the sweetness, and she laughs.

He tries to focus on correcting the report, but her laugh distracts him.

"I'm trying to finish," he declares, but his gaze is no longer focused on the screen.

She puts a piece of cotton candy in her mouth and smiles. She doesn't answer him, but she looks sorry for interrupting him, heshe knows it's not her fault, but she didn't impose rules on Titus and around Raven he behaves like a spoiled brat. 

"Sorry, it's just ..." The dog jumps on top of her and licks her fingers. Damian decides that enough is enough and with just a sign Titus settles near his feet. The girl grimaces picks up the book and opens a page. "Is that the report they called you so much for? "

He nodded. 

Gotham City.

The Penguin robbed the city bank, between the streets ...

Raven shakes her hand and opens her palm. Now heshe is sitting next to her, she bumps her shoulders against his, she is small and their palms touch, she thinks she wants to interlace her fingers, but she puts a piece of cotton candy in his hand.

"Eat a little."

He is transported to the first night of mandatory fun when he hated being with the Titans, he did not belong because he knew everything there was to know, he was the most intelligent, disciplined and the most brutal fighter in the world, but nothing else and that is precisely what he lacked. He did not have any social skills, it was never clearer than in that amusement park, he had thought that his mistakes were great, he did not deserve that any of these people accepted him.

Raven had gotten closer; he didn't even know why. She offered him cotton candy ...

Just like now.

Shit. His father would kill him.

He closed the computer and set it aside. Damian eats the cotton candy, he still doesn't like it, it melts in his mouth and it is pure sugar, it is gooey, and his throat warms up, as if he had ingested a liquid at high temperatures.

He draws her in and sits her on his legs.

Raven is slim and diminutive, not muscular like Kory or Donna, but possesses the body of a runner, although both know she is not exceptional in sports, she prefers her magic. He surrounds her waist, and she rests her head against his cheek, as she likes to do when they hug.

She keeps her gaze on her book and turns the pages.

Read:

With his back to the sun, another day ends in this abandoned town.

You have a wish list:

-Know the city.

-Build an aviary for those little birds that roam your yard looking for food.

-Risking for someone and that it turns out well.

…

Damian laughs wryly.

"What? " She asked, looking him in the eye.

Raven pulls back a little but adjusts the position so that both legs rest to one side.

"You were drunk when you confessed. You took a chance. "

She buries her head in his shoulder "Don't remind me. "

She is embarrassed. He Finds this charming.

"It went right."

Raven stiffens, and looks him in the eye, but Damian is smiling because he can't help it and he likes to see how certain answers surprise her. She puts those eyes that he only sees when he smiles at her, it's like she's melting inside, struggling to hold back a sigh; He has seen her do it before they started dating because Damian Wayne is not a fool, he is still the son and heir of the best detective in the world, and he was taught from a young age to measure personal body language; It is adorable.

Maybe he still slips.

He strokes her hair, tucking one of her locks behind her right ear.

They looked into each other's eyes.

 "Yes." She kisses him, sighs against his mouth, and Damian interlocks his fingers giving her a soft squeeze. "I did something right. "

His grandfather and mother would be scolding him, an Al Ghul did not hold his partner as a delicate thing and allowed himself to be kissed without a purpose, even his father who had lost the ground to the Gotham cat would give him a disapproving look, it is dangerous to establish a personal connection with your teammates, but none knew and to be honest, they were not interested.

In fact, no one knows for sure.

The diamond sparkles on her forehead.

"My father still wants to kill you."

Of course, yes.

She changes position now sitting face to face, strokes his chest until she stops at his heart and stays there. He really doesn't understand how he came to this, he didn’t expect to find love, nor in a million years would he think about being in this position, but he won't run from this. All the voices from his past scream in his head, but Damian stays.

It is so unexpected.

Damian hates when something doesn't go according to plan, because he usually has it all coldly calculated, if it doesn't work then he would have a backup. As the future leader of an organization, his life was designed, as Robin, he has to be prepared for everything and being a Titan, he took on the hard work, the aspects that others would not take care of, everything was perfected. This is out of his hands.

"I hate accidents except when we went from friends to this"

Raven smiles and they kiss.

All the murders, all his past, all the pain and confusion, the hatred and the persecutions are nothing compared to her.

End.

[everythingoesnk]

Good man

summary; you’re an angel (literally an angel) and the world needs you. what for? to babysit mclennon. spoiler: you cannot resist john.

word count; 3 248

disclaimers; i’m SO proud of this but give me feedback lol you just can’t imagine how much it helps and motivates to keep writing

warnings; cannot think of one.

********

Too many of yours had been killed. Many others were still held in custody, tortured for the sole purpose of unleashing a war your community had been avoiding.

The smartest decision would’ve been to end the nonsense and face the enemy head-on, but again, you were angels. Dialogue always came first.

You learned the lesson.

This last year you’d been training and developing physical skills that initially don’t belong to your committee. What you didn’t know was the irrefutable decision the Parliament imposed in one of their meetings that they later would communicate to the nation: put into practice, only if necessary, the fighting tactics that you acquired. Not here, but on Earth. Long story short, become guardians. A large number of people understand that as angels that’s what you are. They’re not wrong, in a way.

On a final note, the Parliament concluded that its best pupils would descend to protect humans from the vehemence of the Evil.

Each angel has two people assigned.

Yours are Paul McCartney and John Lennon.

//

18th of June 1967, 15:18 pm

“Today marks six months since we met, and on top of that, it’s my birthday. Have you bought me anything?” Paul inquired from the sofa, straightening his neck to get a better view of your face.

It was difficult with you staring out the window, scanning every inch of the street and skyline, never turning to show any interest in what he was saying.

Dropping his head backwards, he added quietly, “And nothing happened”

“Is that disappointment in your tone?” you asked impassively, still not turning.

“Disappointment is not the word”

“What’s the word then?”

Your eyes travelled to a different point. No longer on the clouds that ventured the signs of a storm but on your partner and one of the other three funky insects.

Matt was near the metal gate, keeping an eye on the vicinities and probably rolling his eyes at the fans’ screeches coming from behind the entry, crying for any sort of interaction with their idols.

Not far from there John was sitting on the hood of his car.

Something must have told him he was being watched because he put down the hand with the cigarette and looked up to the same window you were at almost instantly.

An uneasy feeling that you couldn’t quite describe expanded around your heart after his inquisitive stare settled on you.

Flustered, you looked coyly to the left and right, because maybe Paul shifted to your side and you didn’t notice.

That got a small laugh from John.

Paul wasn’t in the room anymore but on the bathroom taking a pee, you could hear him. Regaining your usual erect composure, your brows pinched in a frown.

John got off the hood and put out the cigarette on the sole of his shoe before heading towards the building, looking in your direction once more with hands in his pockets and a sinful smirk tickling his lips.

“No,” you told Paul, observing John until he couldn’t be seen no more.

He shot you a confused glance as he finished pulling up the zipper.

“Babe, be more specific”

“I didn’t buy you anything” you concretized, facing him, “but I’m here to save your life in case you need to be saved. And if the moment comes I will, I’m a good warrior”

Paul blushed. He flapped his hand at you.

“It was a joke”

“I hope you were joking too about ‘nothing’ happening. You should be grateful you weren’t in any danger just yet”

You swore you could boil an egg in his face.

//

18th June 1967, 15:39 pm

“We’ll be back before dinner” Matt informed, putting on a jacket.

“Do the wings break through the clothes when you… invoke them?” Ringo asked.

George and John didn’t make any witty remarks, wondering the same secretly.

You and Matt exchanged looks. He shrugged and you thought it wasn’t worth your time answering.

“We do not invoke them. They appear when we need them”

Ringo kept asking questions but you didn’t focus on them, after all he was Matt’s responsibility. He was taking them –George and Ringo– to pay a visit to their wives. Matt missed driving so they didn’t mind him taking the wheel.

In Paul’s case it was Linda and her guardian who dropped by every now and then.

Due to the first impression of them, you thought Paul and John would be more demanding, however, they didn’t bother you and mostly stuck to doing their own thing.

Paul was taking a nap in the room next door; John’s whereabouts were unknown. You had to find him for his safety.

Gliding down the corridor you bumped into him.

You folded your arms across the chest.

“Where were you?”

“A fan dodged security and was waiting for me in the lobby. We talked for a bit and snapped a picture”

“For the thousandth time,” you groaned, annoyance streaming through your body like lava, “do not speak to anyone if I’m not around! Why do you keep disobeying my instructions?”

“She looked regular” he justified.

You looked at him as you might a cockroach.

“Demons disguise themselves accurately to fool jerks like you” you spat out.

Pulling a theatrical painful face, he brought a hand down to hold on to his dick and testicles, simulating that your words kicked him just there.

“Lennon, do not make it harder than it needs to be. I didn’t choose to have to follow you around like a puppy”

“Alright, can you take a moment to try and understand how overwhelming the situation is for us as well?” he argued, putting on hold his reckless demeanour.

Rubbing your eyes you sighed, “Yes, I can, but—”

“Forgive me”

“I forgive you, but don’t do it again”

A tender grin formed on his face, content that you didn’t put up much of a fight.

“Before I got interrupted I was actually on my way to get you. I wanna show you something”

You rolled your eyes. He’s so random.

Back in the room, he went straight to the piano. After tuning it his eyes wandered to the empty space he had next to him on the bench, waiting for you to take it.

Your expression switched from curious to stupefied.

Following his command you sat down.

Your gaze flickered from his eyes to his lips and from lips to his fingers. He played so carefully and delicately in the beginning, introducing the prologue of his piece, that you lost yourself somewhere in the middle of it. Recalling the day you entered Heaven you shivered.

Music filled the air, hijacking every part of your mind.

The melody began to change, more macabre and haunting. It reminded you of everything beginning to fall apart, when the enemy showed no mercy and without guilt slayed the innocent.

You weren’t aware of how you were digging your fingernails in his leg, the shrieks of the victims ringing in your ear.

John stopped playing, placed his hand on top of yours and clasped it firmly, looking concerned.

You shook your head and instead walked away, needing space.

John squared his shoulders as he took a deep breath and sauntered up to you. Brows together, you shrank back.

“I didn’t want to upset you,” he said, respecting the distance.

You remained quiet, head buzzing.

He squinted at you and tilted his head.

“Talking about it might help you”

“Have you taken it on yourself to be my personal psychologist?”

He held your gaze. It was the pain talking, not you. He knew and he was going to be patient.

“It’s not your fault this is happening. Any of this”

“Stop”

“You need to hear it. You have this vast weight on your shoulders—”

“I could’ve done something!” you hollered, saturated with the remorse you’d been accumulating. You knew you weren’t responsible for the cataclysm. He didn’t… he didn’t understand. “Those monsters killed them in front of me! Marta, Norman, Charlie! I can still feel how my body jarred after witnessing every stab and poisoned bite. Blood was gushing out of their mouths and I did nothing!”

The image of you petifried watching them die and not being able to help repulsed you.

How could you have been so cruel?

John held his breath. That was what was torturing you.

“You aren’t responsible for their deaths”

“Aren’t I?” you fumed, the void in the middle of your heart widening. “You know nothing”

The bitterness in your voice made his nostrils flare.

Through his bones echoed the determination to cure your scars. However, he understood it wasn’t his job to heal you.

“And I’ll never get to apologize”

You could sense John’s question without him actually asking.

“Demons get to exist thanks to the souls they rip from their owners. The bodies vanished after that” you explained, feeling dizzy.

Throat dry, you brought a hand to your forehead.

Beneath your typical mask of coldness never would have John imagined you were battling against yourself.

It brought him back to when he felt like he could have prevented his mum from leaving the house, saving her life. He was seventeen. Seventeen, not three or four. He could have warned her about the insanity of driving under those conditions. The wind was brutal that day, and it rained cats and dogs. Instead, he kissed her cheek good-bye and went to his room.

He blamed himself too at first. It was a long and tormenting process, but he comprehended he wasn’t guilty. You’d get to that point eventually, he thought, you’d have only gotten yourself killed too if you’d have intervened.

The breeze that came through the window dried your tears and moved the hair away from your notable cheekbones. He attempted to reach out to you for the second time. You just stared at him, biting your quivering lower lip. He stood before you, eyes boring into your mournful ones.

Wrapping his arms around you, he pulled you slowly against him. You sobbed into his chest as you snuggled closer for shelter.

John pressed his cheek onto the top of your head.

“It’s not your fault” he repeated, emotion palpable in his tone.

It’s not my fault. It’s not my fault. It’s not my fault.

//

2nd of February 1968, 12:13 pm

Matt dug his elbow into your ribs.

“He fell for you,” he said with a huge smirk, and imitated your pose: hands laced behind the back, eyes closed and body toward the sun taking in its pleasant rays.

“Shouldn’t have” you muttered after a pause, forcing the letters out of your mouth.

“That card you keep playing of apathy is ridiculous”

“I’m not playing any apathy card”

“Pretending you have no feelings for John won’t make it easier tomorrow”

You blinked and turned to him. He opened his and fixed them on you.

“I’m simply prioritizing other things”

“What other things are those?”

He knew already.

He knew that the things you just claimed to prioritize over your damn feelings were nonexistent. Like always, he was right. You didn’t want to triple the suffering that implied separating from John by confessing.

War was over. Angels defeated the beasts and freed themselves and humanity; home awaited your kind.

“My dear (Y/N),” Matt laughed dreamily, “you have all the time in the world to wait for him. Find out if he will still love you then”

//

3th of February 1968, 18:21 pm

John lost track of the number of times he rehearsed the torrent of words he planned on telling you.

He raised his hand and put it in a fist. Up in the air, he couldn’t seem to bring himself to knock on the door. Explicit terms and a deep groan escaped his lips. He dropped it and inhaled deeply, heart pounding frantically.

When he thought he was ready to finally do it Paul emerged from the closest corner, sprinted and knocked four times, running afterwards to the room that George and Ringo shared before John could catch him. And he did try.

“Ay! You want a fuckin’ hole in your face, you punk?!” he banged on their door, getting angrier with their laughs.

He almost lost it when Ringo hummed ‘With A Little Help From My Friends’.

Nonplussed, you crossed your arms and stood watching John from your spot after opening the door.

Just like before, his sensor did not fail him. He stopped his actions shortly and whirled around. Reddening abruptly, for a second he was sure his face was on fire.

You cleared your throat.

“Well?”

Cautiously, his brain stuttering, he glided the necessary steps to be in front of you.

He opened his mouth but didn’t get to say anything because Matt appeared from behind you.

“Who is—”

Immediately after seeing John his eyes widened.

“Oh God! I’m sorry! Were you- Oh my God, I’m sorry! Shit, go on” he gasped, and literally hurried inside.

That only aggravated the layer of crimson sprayed in John’s complexion.

You wanted to laugh but didn’t, obviously he was there to make the first move. You flashed him a small smile for support. He smiled at you too in return.

“Follow me”

Imperceptible in his voice, he succeeded in hiding elsewhere he feared rejection.

You raised an eyebrow teasingly. He frowned then chuckled in realization.

“Please?”

You giggled, which sounded way too girly for your liking, and took his hand in yours.

John led the way to the rooftop of the hotel.

Garlands of white and pink roses decorated the space, and since the sun was setting, you got to see how the orangy golden lights ghosted over John’s skin which made him look not handsome but celestial. At the distance, a trail of a plain crossed the horizon. You admired the view for a few more seconds and then drifted your eyes back to him.

The kindness and love reflected in his felt as warm as a kiss on the forehead of your favourite person in the world.

“I have to be quick, you don’t have much time”

He wasn’t wrong. You had to leave soon.

“Here, take this” he handed you a paper folded in half. “Open it when you’re there”

You averted the gaze towards the sheet and nodded. His eyes desperately searched yours again. Every second counted.

“I love you” he blurted out, a bizarre combination of panic and hope evident on his face. Like a child who just confessed that he broke granny’s vase, praying not to be grounded. “And I really, really want to kiss you”

The longing in his request melted your heart.

When you were about to let him know that you wanted it too you felt it in your back. You felt the muscles pulling the skin, pushing to make their way through to the outside.

One moment they weren’t there the other your wings were now displayed broadly for him to see.

They raised themselves, ready for departure.

John’s mouth fell open.

Unable to stop staring at their grandiosity and splendour, heartbeat wildly pumping, he ran a hand through his hair.

“You’re fucking gorgeous,” he said breathlessly.

With tears in your eyes, you cupped his head in your hands and laid your mouth on his mouth without prior notice.

In that very instant, right there, the world stopped spinning.

He moved his silky wet lips against yours, pressing you further in until there was no space in between when the saltiness of your teardrops mixed with the saliva.

Your wings started aching awfully by now, and you knew what that meant.

Not wanting to, you pulled back from the kiss, lips burning.

“No” he purred, holding you in place, fingers gripping so tight around your upper arms that the skin beneath them turned white.

“John, it’s time”

Brokenhearted, you withdrew fully after rubbing your noses in an affectionate eskimo kiss.

You nudged intimately his chin up with your thumb.

John didn’t want to miss the opportunity to absorb your dazzling beauty thus he forced his eyes open.

“Part of my heart will stay with you. Remain a good man, Lennon, and return it to me. I trust that we’ll meet again in due course”

3th February 1968, 23:33 pm

Excitement throbbed in you. Seating cross-legged, you created walls with your wings to avoid snoopers and unfolded the paper.

It was a piano score. At the bottom of it, written in his handwriting, was a small note:

“I changed the ending. Now it’s about finding peace and picking up your broken bits to build a stronger armour. You’re a fierce woman, (Y/N), but whenever that feeling tightens and saddens your heart, play this”

Tangled in a mix of joy and sorrow, you half smiled as a tear rolled down your cheek and chin, landing in John’s signature.

//

8th December 1980, 22:50 pm

Everyone fell silent.

You noticed that all of your fellow companions and friends had their gazes bonded to the same spot. Slowly, you turned to check what they were looking at, and you nearly passed out.

He rarely visited. Only when he had good reasons to.

Gait steady, knowing very well what he was doing, he gave a quick look around as he paced.

His eyes found you.

Saint Peter offered you a reassuring smile, causing everyone to snap their heads at you.

“(Y/N) (Y/L/N)”

You swallowed.

“Y-yes?” you sputtered.

“I believe you’ll want to see this”

Uncertain, you joined him, not before sending Matt a doubtful look.

In any case, all your questions were answered when you reached the Gates and saw who was waiting for you. His wings were even more impressive, glittering and elegant than anyone else’s.

He was touching their feathers, inspecting them.

You ran to embrace him. Off guard as you took him, his arms were trapped under yours, preventing him from being able to hug you back.

“You shouldn’t be here. What happened, John?” you said, a million thoughts rushing through your mind.

“(Y/N)…” Saint Peter warned.

Under no circumstances it was allowed to ask for the reason behind someone’s death nor tell yours. It was the rules; the subject was forbidden.

You squeezed your eyes shut and nodded.

Taking a couple of steps back, you looked up to him. John bored his eyes into yours, lips stretching into a dainty smile.

“Hello, love. I took great care of the piece of your heart that you borrowed me” he said, twirling a strand of your hair between his fingers. “The time has come, I can give it back”

“It was for you, dummy” you answered with a laugh, voice cracking.

He dropped his head shyly to the floor, smile growing larger.

You followed where his eyes were pointing at, only to see his bare toes scrunching into the delicacy and softness of the cloud, getting familiar with it.

“I’m sorry you’re here” you whispered, honestly horrified that he didn’t get the chance to grow old.

“I was never scared of dying,” he spoke, slowly raising his head, “because I knew I’d be with you”

Staring at each other, none spoke for a moment.

“I love you too, by the way,” you admitted, pink arising in your cheeks. “I realized after I left that I didn’t say it back”

John smirked. He caressed your face and you felt the butterflies in your tummy flutter.

Love danced in the brightness of his eyes.

“Show me Heaven, (Y/N)”

[jess-the-vampire]

Sky and the Forces of the Multiverse, Chapter 39

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-

A lot happened within the next few days.

Which was expected during a time like this, and in combination with everything that had just happened, but no day provided them a break, things seemed to always been happening now even if they weren't a direct attack. It put everyone on edge because who knew what they would be in for today at this point. No one held it past anything anymore.

Jackie for one, was gone, most likely sent out to search for luna, only after star confronted eclipsa on the matter.

She hadn't been seen for days, even when speaking to Kelly the Woolette mentioned Jackie had disclosed she was about to go on a mission for the queen and Kelly had to hold the fort with the rest of the knights. Sky didn't even see most of the squires in training anymore because she had little reason to visit them, but she could always hear them whispering about luna.

Maybe luna was kidnapped?

Maybe luna was a spy this whole time for an enemy of theirs? It'd explain why she was as skilled as she was.

Maybe she just plain died and the queen was covering it up?

Maybe nothing happened and jackie kicked her out or gave her to another knight to have as his or her squire?

Sky was quick to avoid all the rumors, and just avoid luna's fellow knights in general, she only was running into them so much because with jackie gone some of them were getting more unruly and more suspicious. Luna didn't really share much about her being a knight though it was plainly obvious she became a favorite of jackie's and a top knight quickly, seeing jackie's pupil disappear and jackie soon after was bound to cause issues.

And sky hoped jackie came back soon so the rumors died down before her mom got put on trial for a murder she didn't do.

Judas had been more tired then usual, sky first assuming it was due to stress but he mentioned to her he'd been having nightmares, which was never reassuring for his best friend.

Landon had been busy mostly to himself, but considering how he usually was judas had to assume he was mostly trying to get in contact with Bernard, though he didn't know for sure if it was normal friend stuff or landon was working up his courage to confess to him or not.

Meanwhile the Spiderbites had approved of eclipsa's charm after testing it, it was ready to be used on the queen before the charm wore off. Though it had annoyed angel just a little they took so much time testing it when he clearly just wanted them to focus on helping his mom as soon as possible before she was lost. There was no telling how time they would have left after all even if star set it back a little more.

Especially since his mom was getting a little weaker, he couldn't have expected star's temporary fix to last forever.

She was being tube fed and taken care of well but it was clear her body was still fighting itself and she barely moved.

His hope had been draining fast, even if people had been reassuring him they had a chance and it wasn't over yet.

He really just hoped the charm helped and they came up with the best way to fix this whole thing, as soon as possible.

Though he sat by her side as the charm was placed around her neck and the spiderbites sent him away promising they were almost finished with a solution to guarantee the removal of the parasite. This sent him to find sky, who was in the middle of talking to melaine, mostly to help her have a better understanding of mewni, but also to hear her updates on her theories and info.

It was her thing after all.

Though sky wasn't alone, judas, nora, sunny, galexia and celeste were with her, though they all mostly were doing different things.

Judas was mostly trying to get a hold of mason, who failed to pick up or speak to him the last few days, getting embarrassed and running off. Celeste was resting in the corner with her large rainmaker wand, forming little clouds to keep herself busy though she still seemed a little sad, nora was looking around at some of sky's things, mostly admiring her clothes and hats, and sunny and galexia were whispering among each other.

Angel's appearance was welcomed by all of them, it was so pleasant, entering a room and everyone being happy to see him. Though maybe they were laughing at how judas's clothes were kinda a little big for angel despite how nice he looked in them. Either way at least they were smiling instead of scowling and that was something he'd never get used to honestly.

And Angel took his seat next to judas and sky.

Sky was busy but judas was not as he put down his compact and rubbed at his face, "Mason isn't getting in contact with me...i've tried to speak to him but he ignores me, and there's no sign of the truth potion.". He was left with the impression mason didn't get the potion and was too embarrassed to admit this to him after telling him he could be responsible and do it.

Mason didn't normally ignore anyone, he liked seeing his brothers, having him try and avoid judas like the plague was a bad sign. He was rather social most of the time and he loved spending time with his family, if angel was avoiding people he loved he must've had a serious reason for it. Though for what reason wouldn't be clear without his presense.

Clearly distressed, Angel reached out to comfort the boy with a pat on the shoulder, an awkward one. It didn't seem to entirely make judas feel better but it did get a laugh from him out of seeing the other prince awkwardly try to be more affectionate. Angel kinda still had some stuff to learn with proper social interaction and how to talk with friends but he was getting better.

Though with his own lack of siblings, it was probably harder to give judas any good advice on what to say or do, being siblings probably added an extra layer to any conflict or non-conflict they had with each other.

In fact the only one in this room who had siblings from their own dimension, was Sunny.

And Sunny seemed to have a better relationship with her own brother back home then judas seemed to with his own siblings.

Though as Sky focused on whatever mel was going on about angel tried to give him the best advice he could, "Um well...maybe focus on something else and let him figure it out?". Angel might not know if that was the best thing for judas to do but judas actually seemed to agree with him, the demon prince was nodding and angel removed his hand from his shoulder.

"I just hope everything's ok.".

"With your brother? Well...your younger brother i'm sure will come back soon and explain himself...I mean...he's...not really shy or anything, he probably has reasons...", well, it was about as good as anything angel could give to help judas out. Though that clearly wasn't the only thing on judas's mind, he turned to look at angel and then to his cursed arm.

"It...seemed to act up...last night...I had nightmares...I had a hard time sleeping and it's skyrocketing my anxiety.".

Oh...

"Are you...in any pain?", he didn't want to ask but he had to, it was almost in his nature at this point.

He received a sigh, and thankfully judas shook his head no on that, "No pain...but a lot of panic...I've been having nightmares more often recently...I was just trying to rest and relax and enjoy the good news but i'm starting to freak out and I'm not sure it's helping...nora offered to give me something to help me sleep better but I should be alert in case...y'know...Her shows up.".

Nightmares? Every night? One nightmare was bad enough but having multiple every night?

"Does sky-?".

"Yeah, no duh I know angel, best friend here...he called me in the middle of the night after it happened.", Sky closed her compact, showing she and mel finished speaking, "Judas maybe you should take nora's offer, you need to relax and rest and I think all of this is just making it worse...maybe you could start by taking a nap here if you want to?".

She motioned to her messy room and bed, which wasn't the most unpleasant place for the demon to take a rest even if it was rather messy due to it's owner.

"Maybe you're right...but...what If i have another nightmare?", sky was quickly to lean past angel and push Judas onto the surface, "Then we'll see when we get to it, but you should rest...ok?". Judas grumbled but didn't protest much further, lying down, "Ok...i'll give it a shot...just...if anything happens...". Sky seemed to know and she patted his back as he tried to lie down on the bed and close his eyes.

And sky threw a blanket over her friend before leading angel away from the bed to give judas some space, judas was going to need some peace and quiet if he was going to get any sleep back.

And having them surrounding him would do nothing good for his nightmares for sure.

"Judas has put me in charge angel so...if you got anything, let me know...judas needs rest...he's so used to being the leader and taking care of everyone and being well...judas...he really needs a break. So you, me, sunny and galexia are going to go talk to mason and sort this whole mission out for him and Celeste and nora can watch him while we're out and alert us.".

"We're going to speak to his brother?".

"Yep, getting our potion back just in case...I mean the thing ain't always helpful but we might as well get it back. If i hadn't gotten myself worked up we wouldn't have lost it in the first place so i should get it back if i can...if mason doesn't have it already.". Sunny and lexi were already heading over to them, "So yeah, you know sunny, i don't think you know lexi super well.".

Galexia waved, and angel waved back slowly.

This girl was TALL.

Well, so was judas, judas was taller then her, but still.

Galexia must've been a little bit able to tell angel was intimidated by her size so she followed it up with a big smile and a big hug, welcoming angel to working on their team but also crushing him a little. Sky was already letting nora and celeste know where they'd be before they all left sky's room. The door shutting behind them as the four roamed the halls.

"So um...anything from your human friend?".

"Huh? You mean mel?"

"Well yes...you were talking when I arrived right?".

"Right right...well...i dunno she went off how maybe luna is responsible and maybe my mom is and like...it's just not a lot of really good ones right now, i don't think any of them are probably real...yet...". She seemed embarrassed, maybe asking a conspiracy theorist really wasn't the best person to help her figure out this incredibly serious issue.

Judas didn't like mel doing this stuff and he warned sky on multiple occasions since they met.

But it was less she thought mel was embarrassing and more she felt embarrassed for screwing up on her skills as a leader and not getting the best results. Granted, she should not have expected mel to just solve all her issues at the drop of a hat anyway, mel was mostly doing the best she can, even if her best was yet to give sky the answers she wanted.

"Oh...uh...sorry?".

"No need to say sorry...it's just kinda how things are going...they take time..." she still seemed to be a bit upset though, she probably hadn't expected being leader to go as super easy but judas clearly made way more progress in charge then her so far, they had plans but what they needed were full on results. If they knew what this person wanted they could trap them...but even if they found luna...she probably wouldn't know.".

They'd need something inciting, something they would want.

But what?

"Sky?", sunny tugged on her arm, "What's our plan for mason? Do we just talk to him? What if he doesn't wasn't to say anything to us?". Mason and Sunny were friends and did get along but she was right to be worried, if the boy was avoiding his own brother and even sunny herself during their dinners then talking to him probably wouldn't do a lot.

In fact, they didn't even know where he'd be.

"Well...we'll ask around and I guess we'll figure it out as we go?".

It was honestly the best advice she could give under the circumstances.

But as they teleported back to the underworld to get started on their search, they were greeted almost instantly by the former king of the underworld himself, Dave Lucitor. The man was surprised as one would if you popped out in front of them like that, but he quickly composed himself, probably used to something like this happening down here when demons regularly did that.

"Kids! Hey there! Hello sunny!", he smiled at the small girl as sky got to the point on why there were here.

"Where's mason?", that was a pretty sudden thing to be asked after being spooked at the man's appearance but they had o get right to the point if they wanted to get anywhere today. Thankfully they were in the presence of someone who might be able to give them some answers, instead of being froced to check the palace from top to bottom for the prince.

The former king, impressed with her boldness, crossed his arms and leaned his head, "Mason? Well he's been trying to help me out a lot for the last few days, so right now he's in my office, i was just going out to get us some snacks. What about it? He's not in trouble is he?". They were quick to tell him something, they really didn't need the guy with ears everywhere getting suspicious right now.

"No no...we just need to talk to him, uh...where's your office?".

"Just head down the hallway, take a left and he'll be at the end of the hallway in my office...though I could go with you all if you need-"

"No no...that's fine, get your snacks...we...won't be long anyway.", sky was quick to try and get away but dave stopped them, "Hold up, I wanted to ask...hows judas? We haven't gotten to talk much recently because he's been away...". With judas currently taking a hopefully calm nap in her room, the last thing he needed were his family members bursting in to worry him.

"He's...ok...", sky simply responded, "Just...busy...".

"He's sleeping", galexia piped in, before anyone could really stop her.

Though the man didn't say much further on where the boy was, "Well next time you see him, tell him to call me...I want to speak to him on his coronation and well...everything going on with it". There would be a lot to say it seemed, no one was sure if it would even go on anymore, at this rate it might be set back for a few more years in fact.

A place like that? an event like that? Perfect for someone like her to hide herself in...well if she had a reason to attend in the first place.

Then it hit sky like a brick, and it must've been right on her face because everyone was looking at her funny.

But she needed to get moving, "Uh...yeah we'll let him know, thanks Mr Lucitor!", and ushered the rest of her group to follow, leaving the man behind who shrugged and went on his way to grab some donuts. Everyone noticed sky's face but angel was the first to ask, "Sky...um...beg my pardon but...is something wrong? You now seem a little...more upset.".

"I'm not upset angel...in fact...thanks to him, I might have an idea...an idea about how we might be able to lure that...person".

"An idea?".

"We'll talk later...let's just finish this mission.".

The door the man had mentioned was quickly opened, and right there in front of them, going through several draws on the left, was mason. His wings were basically a dead giveaway as even as small as he was those things were too big to hide him away from what he was doing. The boy was so spooked, probably assuming it was his grandfather back already from his snack hunt.

But he wasn't anymore relieved to see who had actually found him.

"Mason!", galexia waved excitably to the boy, who suddenly became red with embarrassment.

Though he sent her a meek wave back.

"You could've just told judas y'know?", sky said to the boy, helping him go through another shelf, "We were gonna find out eventually, so might as well have told us and let us help you out...saved you some touble.".

"I was undercover!", mason argued back, "Judas said i could do it and i wanted to do it!".

"Well I asked judas to do it", sky told him back, "But he's been so busy he asked you...and still...after the first attempt, you could ask us?".

Lucifer, how many of the Lucitor kids had problems trying to prove themselves to others?

"I almost did it...".

"Well no, but only because of being unlucky...maybe the fact you went to a confrontation with fae might of already sorta made sure you wouldn't get what you came looking for...".

Mason's ears flickered on the mention of the demon girl.

"Anyways, let's just find it and go before he gets back."

The others were already helping them out, sunny cleaning and fixing each drawer they went in so it looked the same as when they left it. Granted, considering the strength and danger of a potion like this maybe the guy wouldn't just sit it somewhere a 13 year old could easily find it. Heck, maybe tom has it as he apparently held the investigation and interrogation of fae afterwards.

It wasn't unreasonable to consider.

"Grandpa seemed super happy when we passed him by ",Sunny mentioned, "I miss him so much, he loved my performances back home, but he's super happy here...so that makes me feel a little better.". Mason's wings flickered a little, "Yeah, i've been hanging out him...I hoped he would show me where to find the potion but...I couldn't find it at all.".

"You still have fun?".

"Maybe...a little...", the boy huffed, "But I want to help judas out and I couldn't do what he wanted because i'm too young, just like I can't help out anyone because my parent's think i'm too young.". He went through a few books before putting them back and shutting the door of the desk, "I'm tough...I can help out...i'm not like...a little kid right?".

"Just because you're not a little kid doesn't mean you can't get in trouble...", Sunny said, rummaging around, "I'm 14 and back home everyone says i'm a prodigy and i'm super mature and all that but I uh...I get myself into trouble sometimes...I uh...I made judas upset at one point. Cause I tried to sorta convince something of loki and he didn't think it was ok to do...".

"Really?", Mason seemed surprised, Sunny always came off as if she never made anyone mad and rarely got into fights.

"Yeah...and I stabbed judas once...and celeste got mad with me...and angel saw through my kinda lies...", angel nearby pricked up his ears, "Uh...for the record I mostly guessed...I think me trying to lie and practice to avoid tells made it easier to spot other's tells but I still mostly guessed.". He was sheepish before coughing and getting back to work.

"Yeah, your family is just being protective of you...not that they don't trust you...they just love you.".

Mason sighed before his hand found something, moving aside a hidden panel under the desk he almost hit his head as he pulled out the truth potion. It was still blue and partially used up, but it was definitely the same potion he had helped landon make. He almost screamed before the others quickly cleaned up the room and mason's victory was short lived as sunny reached out her hand to take it.

"Good, thanks mason, we better go before he gets back...", sky was relieved, she was so worried she had practically been watching the door more then searching.

Mason seemed to have his victory sucked away as he handed it over to sunny, who winked at him, "We'll tell judas you found it, we promise. But we have to fast before he spots us...ok?". But that victory was short lived as the door opened up and the former king walked in, with a box of donuts and a smirky smile on his face as he saw the embarrassed teens.

He leaned against the wall, chomping down on a donut. Everyone was left wondering how long he'd been standing there, he could've been for minutes, maybe an hour outisde of that door considering how distracted they all were trying to find what they needed considering how quiet he was being. But everyone seemed to have had their heart completely stopped at the sight of him.

They were so dead,

"What part of "Eyes everywhere" do you guys not get? You should know better then to think breaking into my office would simply be a cakewalk."

-

Judas quickly awoke from his nap, in a sweat, the girls only slightly scared at his sudden wake and quick to run to his aid to check up on him.

He was breathing heavily and nora was quick to check his temperature, demons were already naturally warmer then most creatures but judas did seem a little more above the line then usual. The Boy clearly just getting out from another nightmare and almost on instinct a rain cloud formed above him, raining onto his sweating head and all over the sheets.

Nora quickly looked to Celeste who shrugged.

"He probably wanted a cold shower right? That's something that's supposed to help wake someone fully up?".

Nora sent her a look that told her that sky would probably not be pleased to know they soaked her sheets whole she was gone and celetste grumpily turned ger head away from the princess.

The storm was quickly turned off, judas spitting out some water and rubbed his face, "I've had nightmares before, but not so...frequent before...not since I was a kid. I don't...I don't know if it's me or...it's...I'm seeing green and...". Nora quickly removed some of her cold slimy hair to place against judas's forehead, "What happened? Did..you...see anything?".

"I...I saw...something...a door? But I also saw...my arm...I think it...attacked me...".

"Was this the same one as last time?".

"Yeah...I think so...at least it's similar more then anything.".

She quickly removed the wet sheets to let them out to dry, judas laying back on the bed once more, "I'm not sure what's wrong with me nora...it seems to have started and it won't stop...maybe the stress really is getting to me.". Though celeste seemed more suspicious then anything, her arms crossed, "Look, green dreams sound weird if you ask me, especially with the door thing".

"How can you be sure?".

"Look, one dream in all green? Fine? Several though in a row? You don't find that weird at all?", she leaned on the bed, looking judas directly in the eyes, "Look, i'm not an expert on dreams, that seems to be lexi's weird thing if any of us know. But You haven't started having these nightmares until very recently, and they're all super similar, it's weird and not normal at all...something is wrong.".

"So what should I do then? I have to sleep at some point...", he held himself, shivering, "I can only keep myself awake for so long...I mean... I guess there's an old spell in the book of sleeps to help me stay well rested but...even sky can't do that for me forever...what should I do?", nora was the first to suggest, forcing her reply out of her before she could make herself stay quiet.

"Tell someone...get an expert...um...I mean...there have to be people who can help and look into it right?".

She got rather flustered, but coughed and got herself to cool down to explain her point better, "M-my family are mostly doctors and um...eclipsa is good at mind magic and uh...well your parents could do something, just tell them and maybe one of them can help...maybe". Dreams were a little hard considering there were many ways to interrupt a dream, one could claim his dream was a bad omen another could claim he would visit a green dimension in the future.

It was probably why he hadn't said anything before.

He told anyone and they might not think it's as important as celeste thinks it is.

He'd have just held up everyone with it and it might not even matter.

Though nora seemed to be reading his mind, quick to touch his shoulder and mumble, "Don't think your problems aren't important, they are...if something is wrong you should say something about it so we can help you...it's ok to ask for help...right? Like how you...helped me and you...wanted my help.". Judas rubbed his shoulder though, granted he must've felt a little bad about spending his time trying to have nora help him during a serious event and putting her in danger.

And it seemed he was taking a backseat since, with all of his problems.

And nora only seemed to get more worried, how did they go from judas wanting to help nora to nora wanting to help judas? Judas when he wanted to approach her wanted to help because he cared and wanted to make a connection with her, now that they did, nora just wanted to see him smile like he did before but was unsure how to do it. Judas just wanted to make her feel like she wasn't alone and she had power to stand up against her parents, nora was asking to fix judas's mental health that traumatized him since he was a baby.

That was not going to just go away, and it probably never would.

But she still wanted to do something, even though everything had been hindering her from properly focusing on helping her friend. Though for the time being the demon seemed to have appreciated the shower and cool slime even if sky would probably be upset later on that her bed was now covered in sweat and rainwater from out of nowhere.

"I know nora...but they're not as important as what's going on with you guys, i've been putting up with this for years without error...it's different then the pain everyone else is dealing with. I need to figure out how to fix myself but It can't come before helping you or angel or the girls...you've all been waiting long enough...I can wait a little longer if i have to...".

"Judas...this is important now, you can't just have nightmares like this for the rest of your life...I mean, we need you...you can't help us if you're distressed", celeste had to agree even if she wasn't saying much. "Dude, you really need to stop with your nonsense, the more you keep denying help the worse it's gonna get...I mean sky is in charge but we still need you."

"But...".

"But nothing, you can't help us if you're panicking and tired!".

She was right, he couldn't deny it.

As guilty as he felt about getting help during all this, help prevented him from causing more mistakes in the future.

Mistakes that could easily make things worse for the people he was trying to actually help, and cause so much worse in the long run.

"Ok...fine...but who should I go to? If you really think my dreams are bad and we need to find someone to help with all my...issues...who? I...I'm not sure who can really spare their time to help me.", the spiderbites would most likely not of anyone considering how much they had to deal with as is. His parents? Well they might just send him to someone...

"Eclipsa, she has all the time in the world anyway...", celeste grumbled, "Plus she probably knows dreams a lot better then anyone, might pick up on something the others wouldn't".

Guess she had a point, eclipsa didn't exactly have a lot to do with her time and mind stuff was something she was all too familiar with, though judas was worried eclipsa would give him nothing but bad news on something like this. There was no way he could go there and not feel worried, what if his nightmares were finally about to come true? What if it was going to take control?

Having something take over his body in his sleep was far from preferable for the young demon.

Far from.

"Fine...I'll go see eclipsa...right now, you girls can assist me...just in case I need help...", he got out of bed, before drying himself up in a blast of fire around his body, "Just...stay close by...I could use company right now.". He was followed out of sky's room and moved on his way to the tower, it felt too soon to see eclipsa honestly, and sky might get upset.

But even sky couldn't argue against this if it meant helping him.

However, as the demon knocked on the door, he was surprised to not get an answer, the door didn't open and no one called from inside. He knocked again, but he was still given no answer from inside. Was eclipsa sleeping? Or maybe she wasn't here at all and they came at a bad time? Maybe she was in her private home with globgor? Judas pushed the door opened and headed inside, the girls following.

"Eclipsa?".

As they entered her tower, they found no trace of her or globgor, the room looked tidy and empty.

They weren't here.

Darn.

"Gee, a time where you want her she ain't here", celeste kicked at the floor, "Figures...guess we gotta wait or...I dunno...find someone else.". But Nora disagreed, "We could just look around for her first? We don't know she's left the castle right? You know about eclipsa's secret home, let's go there and see if she's there. It wouldn't hurt right? The sooner we look at this the better.".

"Fine...whatever...I guess...".

It couldn't hurt, the worst is they go there and don't find her and just have to wait till she gets back. Though celeste was clearly not eager to go for some reason or another, and before anyone could ask she responded, fixing her hair clips. "Look, the place is gross and a pain to get to...i'd rather we just teleported there instead to save us the trouble...and then I don't have to row us forever and then come back if she's not there".

Well, at least she was honest about it.

"Maybe, but it's also rude to just...pop in, not to mention eclipsa probably has spells just to keep people from doing so to avoid ambush...it's ok though...i'll-", but nora stepped in front of him, "I'll row us! Judas you can just...relax, and celestte can-". But the other girl shook her head, "Actually, him rowing would probably keep him more awake, he'd more prone to fall asleep if he's just lying down, even if i'm there...besides...we'll all probably row...it might get us there faster...".

Then her bracelet glowed, "Plus...since we'll be alone down there...I can probably help out...just...for now...the commission probably won't think that much of it...mom could cover for us...". Celeste was offering to help out and put their needs before hers, she was warming up to them, and judas smiled at her knowingly despite her huffing and ushering them to go.

"C'mon...the sooner we fix this the better...".

Whatever storm powers Celeste seemed to be good at, did come quite in handy.

They all were rowing of course, but a gust of wind from a small cloud creature moving them through the gross looking water was also helpful. They were practically cruising that as they hit their mark they almost crashed into it with their boat, the ride seemed to get a smile out of celeste though. She actually seemed to have had a bit of a good time hanging out with them.

It was kinda nice.

Celeste wasn't great but she was still a person and they seemed to have tapped into her softer side in some places. Celeste might not want to admit it but she was having a good time and was feeling less angry for once. Though as they made it to their destination she was going back to being grumpy, guess they'd see more of her softer side another day.

As they made it inside they noticed quickly it was dark, judas lighting up some of the lamps around them to light up the room. It didn't look like eclipsa was here either actually, the place looked empty and clean and well...if anyone was in here they were being quiet as heck. It seemed most likely eclipsa was out and just hadn't gotten back yet and judas felt a little dissapointed.

"Maybe we could try queen butterfly?", nora offered weakly, trying to just figure out some kinda solution they could work up off of. The queen did go into someone's mind recently, maybe she could do something like that for judas? Then again, maybe not, nora lack of knowledge on magic just made this whole situation a lot harder for her to help out on.

Celeste didn't seem too surprised though, tapping her foot and grumbling, "Well, this was a wasted trip, let's get out of this dumpy place and find someone else to handle this." She was already on her way out when something sopped her in her tracks. She was quick to walk over to the nearest bookshelf and pull out a purple book that was sitting on the shelf.

It looked old and was covered in stickers, tape, and crayon, but something about it must've caught the girl's eyes in particular otherwise she wouldn't have bothered with it.

"Celeste?", she jolted at them, looking between them and the book, there was no way she couldn't show them what she found.

She showed them the cover.

"Meteora?", the name still seemed to affect judas, he never had met her before and yet he felt like he knew her. Everyone spoke on her and what she was like before her rampage and it was summed up as her being evil but also pitiful because of why she became that way, before this point he had been sure she was well...dead. Hearing about it made him afraid he'd end up the same way, but now he imagined what it was like for her growing up, not knowing what she did.

She probably grew up here, under their noses this entire time, completely ignorant with a fresh start in life to make friends and thrive on mewni without pressure to be anything other then herself. He wondered if they'd meet her eventually, face to face, as far as they knew she was still on mewni . His thought process was distracing them from the reason they were here but he couldn't help it.

Judas was quick to go over and look at the book, "Y'know...I still can't process the fact she's still alive...I grew up knowing nothing about her but that she rampaged and ended up killed before they rebuilt the entire kingdom back up. Knowing she's out there...I wonder how it feels...to have your mind erased and not have to feel terrified of the damage you can do anymore...".

"Judas...".

He carefully flipped through the pages, seeing a young half-monster with purple hair, horns, and cheekmarks throughout. "She's probably out there living her best life without having to worry about stuff like this happening, making friends and having relationships...there aren't even pressures anymore for her to be the next in line and be everything everyone wants her to be...".

"Jude...hey...it's ok...".

Celeste seemed to instantly regret her choice to give judas the book, ripping it from him, "Hey look, I only pointed it out because...meteora was...a bit of a friend to me back home...". She hugged the book to her chest, "I don't have a lot of friends back home but when I was ditching mom, meteora was there to spend time with me...she...babysat me a lot and I just missed her...".

"You never mentioned her before this point-".

"Well i'm mentioning her now ok?! I wasn't trying to get you upset...".

Judas sank, "It's not your fault...It just gets me emotional thinking about this kinda stuff...I know you didn't mean anything...". He stood back up, "Well...I guess there's nothing for us here anymore...we...better go...". Though he couldn't even take another step at hearing a crash in another room, spooking the three teens and making them jump.

Someone was here, and whoever it was hadn't said a word to them since they showed up.

Judas set a flame upon his hand in order to better light up their location, "We better check that out...c'mon...".

He took the lead, the girls following him behind as he opened a door and went further into eclipsa's mini home, finding his way into her kitchen. Though there was no sign of anyone in here, the kitchen being pitch black. Whatever made that noise had to have been in another room, and judas was already on the move to find whoever was sneaking around.

The next door found them in a bathroom, but nothing was there either.

The bedroom? Nah

Meteora's old room? Also nothing though the sight of it seemed to still leave judas conflicted.

Though the lack of progress was getting to celeste especially, stomping her foot and growling. "Where is that stupid sound coming from!? We've checked just about every room in this place!". Not that they knew much about this old home but they had been through every door and checked all the rooms inside and there was no telling where the source was.

Nora was even puzzled, having checked the same rooms, armed with a book, and finding nothing.

"It's as if...the sound is coming from nowhere...but it has to be coming from somewhere! Sound just doesn't come from nothing!".

And then it hit judas whose home they were in.

"Wait a second...celeste, check any of the portraits around here!", he looked determine and if his hunch was correct-

Celeste turned to him, "Wait...what? You think one of the paintings came to- OH!", she quickly ran off to the kitchen first and nora tapped judas on the back. The smaller girl clearly puzzled, "Judas...what if it's someone dangerous? Maybe we should call for help...just to be safe...I really don't want to run face to face with whoever is under that mask.".

But the demon stood in front of her, "Well, if they are...i'm here to help protect you...whatever it is if it's hiding then we'll have the drop on it before it knows what hit em, alright?".

"Alright."

And they quickly heard a whistle from the princess and followed suit, finding celeste back in eclipsa and globgor's shared bedroom, pointing to a portrait of meteora on the wall. "This one's funky...c'mon...let's see what's going on in here..." with judas helping they moved the hidden doorway open, showing a secret hidden passage, they honestly should've guessed eclipsa had some here just like in the castle...it was her favorite way to travel next to her wand.

And judas went first, the girls following him from behind, celeste in the back with her wand at the ready. Honestly they could be exaggerating, they could just find a rat in here, maybe even some old storage that fell over. They couldn't prove anyone was inside of here, thought if there was a chance it was an enemy or eclipsa herself they had to take it.

It smelled, that was for sure, eclipsa probably didn't clean in here very much.

In fact as they crawled around judas stumbled across candy wrappers and cans for soda, maybe this place was a secret room for eclipsa to store her snacks? If it was that would explain why it might have rats inside. They crawled for a little longer before judas hit the end of the road, pushing the wall in front of them and stumbling into a secret room, the girls following.

Only for them to almost be blasted, as food fell from shelves next to them.

Judas panicked and he almost struck the figure before he gapped, looking up at the person who shot at him he was surprised to find-

"Luna?", celeste grumbled, putting down her own wand.

And sure enough, panting in front of them, was the blonde teenager herself, putting down her own wand. Her eyes just as cold as the last time everyone saw all of them, which at this point had been far too long for them that they all couldn't help but stare. The tall princess gripped her wand tighter then before, looking at judas directly in the eyes, her red against her blue.

This was no warm welcome, for either side as luna pointed her finger towards the teenager intruders who stumbled upon her small hideout for the time being.

"You shouldn't be here...".

"So...how long has this been going on...", the former kind munched on a donut and sipped his brew in front of the pile of embarrassed teenagers. Honestly Sky should've seen this coming a mile away, judas always told her his grandfather had ears everywhere he could, if only to keep an eye out for the most unsavory of people. His office of all things would be bugged.

And yet-

Boy, jude was going to love hearing about this one when he woke up, they were about as stealthy as an elephant in an office building. Well, that's what judas would say when he found out.

It wasn't even as if no one could trust him, it was a matter of getting little as involved as possible, otherwise news may spread and news digging too deep about the situation would cause utter chaos. Plus this guy would probably not be happy his own son left him out of this for the most part, this was kinda a family matter after all even if sunny and celeste were...family in another world.

Yet no one wanted to say anything.

Maybe they could come up with a clever lie? Maybe?

His eyes were mainly on his grandson holding the truth potion, and rightfully so.

That was in a safe place last he checked and now it was being held by his youngest grandchild.

The more quiet they were the more suspicious they seemed to be, and the more suspicious they were the more the man would prod at them to find the truth of the matter. Just how much had he heard of them speaking? Did he know more then he was letting on? Or did he just think this was an average heist over a truth potion. Either way anyone knew better then to mess with any king of the underworld.

And sky felt all eyes on her, looking for guidance.

Or maybe just someone to lie them out of this, though she really should not have been their first option on THAT front.

Though Mason was the one to speak first, sensing that maybe as he was the one who started this, he was the one to take the fall for it. " I um...I made this potion awhile back and lost it and I...I just wanted it back...because If mom and dad found out...they'd know-". He seemed rather red-faced about it but his grandpa knew where this was going.

"You went into your garden against their wishes didn't you?", he actually wasn't even mad, in fact he seemed impressed, "I know you have the ingredients for one in your garden, if you were able to get your hands on one it would be through your own means. Eclipsa gave it to me to help, but sounds to me it wasn't originally her own potion, was it?".

He nodded, "I uh...they were just helping me out...I just didn't think you'd give it to me if I asked.".

"I understand, though I feel like I should be concerned for what reason you even made a truth potion. No one just causally makes a potion unless they intend to use it after all, so that's something worth asking. Not that i;m accusing you of doing anything in particular, but you do know you all are the most suspicious people in all of mewni doing stuff like this right?".

"Maybe, but like...we never intended to use it for anything bad...we're not...y'know, evil or anything?".

"Well, perhaps you have a point...but-", and that "But" seemed to make everyone's hearts in the room stop, "I heard something about sunny here stabbing judas? And the fact you're working with judas...I also seemed to have heard something about sunny passing by her grandfather...which is rather strange because as far as i'm aware, you said your family wasn't around here when we allowed you to stay at this castle right?".

Oops

Wow, they really should've been more careful in his office, who knows what other people have heard from them just rambling about everything going on when they thought no one was listening. If people didn't think of it as all lies or a bunch of kids playing pretend who knows if they also might be spreading rumors on what they were doing? God, they completely forgot about bugs, that should've been one of the first things they looked out for!

They were all looking between each other now and the man leaned on his desk, "Listen, i'm going to talk to my son very soon about this regardless, at the very least you should be honest about what's really happening around here so I can better help you.". Sky leaned back in her seat, not looking at him directly in the face, "Look...it's...I'm not sure it's a good idea to tell you...it's not simple to explain.".

"Try me."

But instead of sky explained, sunny stepped forward and wiped the makeup off her face, her sharp blood moon cheekmarks in full view, and the demon king actually seemed rather stunned. Then galexia did the same, revealing her green saint markings, they barely got to show them since they're been there and even angel seemed surprised to finally see them.

She really wasn't going to have much of a choice was she? He sure wouldn't believe her lies and if he approached his son about this there was no way he could lie them out of it either with this guy's bugging and spying. If they didn't tell him now, at this rate he'd find out eventually on his own, sky felt herself give in and lean back in her chair, annoyed but at this point just accepting her fate.

"it's...a long story.".

"Luna...".

"Judas?".

Judas seemed on the verge of crying in the moment, even if he knew luna was safe and he trusted her seeing her in person was incredible. Well, she wasn't perfect, she looked like she'd been living in the woods for weeks but still, she was alive and ok and...well, her normal self. Though hugs were out of the question as she was quick to grab what seemed to be a backpack of snacks to leave.

"Pretend you didn't see me.", she was almost demanding, she sounded so cold, and she was speaking to people who had kinda been basically friends to her before this point as well.

But judas stepped in front of her before she could go anywhere, luna was a rather tall girl but judas was taller. "Not until you explain yourself...we haven't seen you in awhile luna...you...you stepped out on us...". But the girl wasn't much for conversation, sending him a look and a wand raise, "Judas...I don't have time for this...someone is on my tail and you being here does nothing but blow my cover...".

So luna was aware she was being followed by a spy, figured, she was much to smart to think no one would be out looking for her and keeping a close eye on her. Queen Butterfly wouldn't have just let her go without any fight after all, even if she was given a bit of a head start to begin running so no one could have followed her and she'd have time to cover her tracks before anyone could.

She was sneaky, but the queens had been sneakier, and luna did not like that at all.

''You can't just leave! You've mostly cut all communication with us! Where have you been?! So much has happened and...", he was starting to get emotional and for a second it seemed to have gotten to luna's cold heart before she tired to dismiss it entirely. "Look judas, i'm not good at goodbyes and you would not have let me leave if you knew...but regardless I have say in what I want to do...".

"Luna...".

"I'm here to get some food and hide, and you're not making it easy for me...".

"Oh, should we be?", celeste pulled out her own wand, "You want us to just move to the side so you can walk past us and go back to dumping us on the side huh? Figures as much, we finally find you and it's not ' oh hello guys!' or ' How are you?" it's ' get out of my way, i don't want you around!". Celeste was not afraid of spitting back, that was for certain.

"Celeste...this is-".

"This ain't anything, you asked for my help on some ideal that we cared to get home and for the benefit of helping each other we'd do some investigating yourself. But then you decided to dump us as soon as you get a chance to run and cut out from us and don't even care enough to say a word to us...would it really kill you to stay here with us at all?".

"I'm not even supposed to be here, I tracked it down myself and because eclipsa was out i stepped in, figured she wouldn't miss a few candy bars. If she comes in and finds me, i'm busted and done for. I went out there alone to help, and any contact with you or bringing one of you along puts you at risk. I know my strengths and this is for my strengths.".

"So your strengths consist of constantly pushing people down who care about you?".

"

...don't pretend like you didn't push people down yourself".

"Yeah but at least I stayed with them...".

Luna's expression suddenly got angrier.

Nora herself had not exactly been apart of this drama, her relationship with luna herself was rather minimal in fact, thought she could tell whatever happened seriously had affected judas and celeste and luna pointing a wand at them wasn't doing her any favors either. Luna was powerful and she was scary, and luna could blast her way out if she wanted to.

But she didn't seem to want to lay a hand on anyone here despite all of this.

Though someone had to do something, before things escalated or they were caught and she suddenly found herself in a burst of protectiveness for her friends, standing in front of luna directly, arms outstretched. This seemed to have caught luna off guard a little since most of her encounters with the slimely girl rarely showed signs of this much courage.

But she did it anyway.

"Please...put the wand down...let's just...talk...for a bit...if you want to leave you can leave after...", she glanced back to her companions who didn't seem entirely satisfied with that call but it was better then the alternative. Luna considered it, and lowered her wand, celeste following despite clearly not wanting to. Though luna still obviously didn't like being here.

Answering their questions at least avoided them from getting caught by eclipsa or anyone else who might of been out there and would notice any destruction or noise coming from inside of these walls. Celeste was still sending luna a dirty look her way and the blonde knew better then to try anything with her watching, celeste was not as powerful but she wouldn't hold back

"Fine...but i won't be here long..."., she simply muttered in a tone that expressed her displeasure.

"Fine...".

Judas plopped down on the floor, clearly still rather sad and upset.

And for a moment luna seemed actually guilty? Or at least that seemed to be the emotion on her face at seeing her friend in this state.

But she didn't say a word, staying trapped in her own silence and almost waiting it out for the situation to be over. She wasn't even sitting close to the others, keeping her distance as if worried they'd attack her or something. She folded her arms and folded her legs, the stuffy room wasn't exactly comfortable but it was all they had for now till further notice.

Hopefully whatever eclipsa was up to, she'd be busy for awhile.

"I heard about the trail...", she mumbled, "I heard form people...saw...papers...". She didn't seem happy nor sad when mentioning the event, it was probably hard to get too emotional over something she had little involvement with though she was probably happy no one got hurt or arrested. One could simply imagine how crazy the situation would've been with her there.

"We saved ourselves...however we could.", judas wasn't really looking at luna, but he still wanted to speak to her, even if he was hurt. "It wasn't easy though, angel and sky really could've been in a cell by now if things had gone any worse. I was panicking that day, it was...scary seeing everything play out. I was worried i'd lose sky and angel and...maybe even more.".

"Judas...you don't seem...well...".

"Well why should he be feeling peachy!?", celeste almost shouted, "It's not like we're the only ones being affected by what's been happening since we ended up here...everything's...been...a mess.". Judas shuddered at celeste's words, she was...defending him? She was straight up getting in luna's face to help him? It was all just...surreal.

Even luna was quite unused to celeste acting like...well, whatever this was.

"Well, i didn't imply that well...nothing bad was going on with any of you, I just noticed judas seemed to not be doing so well, am I not allowed to be concerned? ". One look at Celeste's face told her everything she needed to know, she knew leaving would have an effect on the group but not to this extent, was she completely cut out from everyone? It seemed like it.

Being away with little communication had it's disadvantages.

She lacked knowledge on the group, their plans, if anything bad may of happened in somewhere secluded, this was all unnerving. Though she didn't bow down to celeste's rude remarks, eyeing the demon. "I think judas himself is allowed to tell me anything he wants, I don't think you can exactly speak for him? He wanted to speak to me so...he can speak to me.".

Though judas was silent still, he did want to speak but didn't seem to know what to say.

Should he ask why she told him nothing? Ask about her strange markings? Ask why she felt leaving was the best outcome for everyone? Ask if she was up to anything...bad since the last time they saw each other? There was too much to talk about and he didn't even know if luna would answer any of it! She did like to keep so much to herself after all and some of this might never come out.

But sitting here in silence didn't help either.

In fact it was only making things worse for everyone in the room and if silence was not broken soon they'd miss their chance to do anything with this time they had to speak to luna.

"Luna...I...i've been having weird dreams, they're new, they started up a few days ago and i'm getting worried. We're here because we wanted to talk to eclipsa to see if she could help me. I don't know what's been happening but I've been seeing green and doors and whispers and-". He was quickly shushed by the blonde, who seemed startled, "Judas...repeat that...".

"I was in a dark room, and...I saw green, I heard noises, and I saw a door...and then my arm-", he didn't seem very eager to finish the rest though lucky for him luna didn't need it , the wheels in her head turning as celeste continued to glare at her. "Judas...I...had a dream very similar to yours...in fact that dream is why eclipsa made me...my charm...".

She pulled a very similar looking charm from under her shirt, "It's weaker now but...I remember passing out on the floor and waking up to find eclipsa making me this, saying it would protect me or something...". Something about that line seemed to run a chill down the boy's spine, eclipsa reacted to a dream by giving luna a magical charm that wards off dark magic?

That didn't bode well for him.

Luna looked at his face, and sighed, taking off the charm and handing it over to him without hesitation. "Here...you might need it more then me, it's not as strong as it was though i've been trying to increase it for as long as I could...using that much magic in a spot would blow my cover and it's been hard to try and get it to maximum strength again but maybe eclipsa can do it...".

"Don't you...need this? You're out in the woods luna! You need this charm!".

"I can protect myself if needed, i can make a new charm if i have to...but...i got this from one nightmare, you're having several in a row, you need this more then me.", luna seemed to insist, and judas placed it around his neck, his head feeling slightly lighter then before. "Keep that entirely safe, and wear it when you go to bed, if you want you can keep it under your clothes if that helps.".

Judas snuck it under his shirt, adjusting is jacket to hide it entirely for now. He didn't want anyone to know for now in case

"Thanks...luna...".

"It's fine, just be careful with it and don't lose it, the charm is useless if you break it or lose it...then again you may ask eclipsa for another, if you find her anytime soon.", celeste was still scoffing at the girl and nora was being rather quiet but neither were attacking her for the time being. Judas trying to get back into a conversation before luna was able to get out of it.

"Look, luna...I know you felt you had to leave us but...you should've said something to us, we're still your friends and...abandoning us like that, without telling anyone? It just made us feel...like you didn't actually care about any of us", he was clutching his jacket and he still couldn't look at her directly in the eyes, but he was sure she was avoiding his gaze as well.

She didn't answer, guess it was hard to make an excuse here, or maybe admitting she did care was harder for her then it was for him. Luna instead seemed to almost ignore what he said, trying to explain herself, "Look, I had to leave...someone needed to be on the outside, and I...i couldn't stay there with them all knowing who i was, or what i was...it...was bad news and I knew better then to put myself in that position."

"Oh, so it's ok for us to be there, but not you?", celeste grumbled, her side comment clearly insulting luna though she made a good point. The girls were also just as vulnerable if not more then luna was, but she didn't think they should've left as well? Luna couldn't even see to come up with any way of going against her, she was technically completely right about that.

"Listen...I...It was better I go then anyone else...I've been out there before, I can survive out there...I wouldn't wish that on anyone else. Back home i'd...well..I camped out for hours to weeks to catch criminals hiding in the woods. This is right up my ally, someone still needs to stay behind and we can't all just live in the woods! Someone had to leave and I was best fit to leave...".

"Yeah? And how's that working out for ya? Don't see a masked lady tied up anywhere?".

This was not going well.

"Um...luna? Will you come back anytime soon?", nora's voice sounded so innocent, so sweet despite everything going on around her. "We could really use your help, if you want to come back, not that you need to it's just...being here might be a lot better...for everyone. Maybe you could talk to the queens and they could give you some assistance and help you out and-".

"No...I...I can't face my mom knowing she knows who I am, neither of them...I'm not someone who can really handle that kind of thing"., she seemed to trail off on that note, leaving the others to wonder exactly what was up between her and her moms. Luna didn't seem to run much from anything but something about her moms she couldn't stand to still be in the room with no matter how much she tried to be brave.

"Luna...why not? Did you moms back home-?".

Luna seemed to know where this was going before shaking her head, "No, not that...but...I just can't face them, I barely like facing them back home, doing it here only makes it more...unfun.". She glared at the others, her voice cold, "I do not know the weight of how you all feel about your own parents, but I know my own, and I know i cannot face them right now...".

"Well you might be facing the rather soon...", the brunette mumbled, "Jackie's out looking for you...on your other mom's orders funny enough".

Luna's face twisted into one of horror, the mere mention of her mom coming after her sending shivers down her spine, she almost seemed nervous her mom would burst through the room and capture her right this second. Luna rarely showed much fear on her part, so when she did it stood out completely. She could clearly fight her mom off with magic if she wanted to and yet-

"She's...WHAT?!".

She quickly stood up, "Oh that's bad, I need to go...NOW! I had to train under her here and she's...she's not someone I want tracking me down...how long has she been after me!?" She was quickly starting to pack up her stuff, "Spy or no spy, i'd much rather run into a spy then my own mother whose hunting me down...I need to get out of here fast...".

"It's only been a few days, luna, don't-", judas was quick to stand up, "Luna...we just got here, I have so much to talk about with you! You can't just-". But the blonde was quick to pull out her wand, pointing it at him. "I'm sorry judas...but I need to move on, I can't be here right now and I need to get a head start on my mom before she tracks me down here...finding you all with me will only make it worse.".

Her wand being pointed at judas seemed to startle nora, who wasn't sure how to react but was quick to stand up to help, celeste was already drawing her wand. They both might've done something if judas hadn't motioned for them to stand down, there clearly was no point in using magic, they'd only get caught sooner and waste time, not to mention energy considering luna would put up one heck of a fight.

"Fine...get out of here...", the demon didn't seem too happy about this but like he had much choice.

Luna put down her wand, walking past the boy without even looking at him.

She stopped, he didn't even turn around to face her but he knew she had something to say.

"Judas...?".

"Yeah?".

"Good luck...", there was a pause but despite th snarling coming from ceelste she left the room, the door of the painting slamming behind her, leaving the teens behind.

And judas closed his eyes, his ears flickering at the door shutting.

"You too...".

The king took a LONG sip of coffee, in fact sky was sure he was almost about to spit it out, as he tried to process what he just heard. Honestly with how many people figured out what was going on due to them screwing up they might as well just tell the entire kingdom at this rate, Sky could practically hear luna complaining to her about revealing their secret once again on accident.

God, hopefully she never had to having being sneaky as a major part of her job as queen.

Actually, knowing what her mom got up to, it would probably be a major part of the job for the unfortunate young girl.

Ugh.

The rest of the room was mostly silent, though if luna were here she'd have most certainty wiped the mind of the man. For once though, sky would've actually been just fine wiping his mind out of anyone else's. But this was what they were stuck with, and this is what they had to live with. Dave was especially looking at sunny, as if now looking for the features she had inherited from their family.

He wasn't exactly dying on the inside, he had probably known about multiverses just as much as his son did. It was almost mandatory at this point to at least mention them to the leaders of the kingdoms in case Omni needed to but his head in about a timeline being broken so the multiverse doesn't collapse. It was one of those concepts that some people just kinda had to be given at least a mention of.

But that didn't mean this wasn't well...shocking considering the context.

This was one of those things that made you see other things in a whole new light then ever before, and he was clearly still processing everything sky had told him in rapid succession. He had probably expected to hear something was going on behind the scenes, this was not quite what he had been expecting though. No one expects this to happen normally.

However, what came next only added to the surprise.

He simply placed his cup down, and sighed, his lips parting before he pulled himself together in front of the kids as the respectful normal king he was.

"Alright, so how do you want me to help?", he said in the most calming voice he could possibly make considering the situation itself.

And everyone sat in awkward silence, the king folding his hands together, looking as clam and serious as ever. He was quick to notice their expressions and elaborate, "You need help, i'm here to help...I'll still be processing everything for days but well...I'll provide you help where I can.". He had his arms folded on the desk as he offered the kids donuts from nearby.

"I won't sell you out...and you don't have to tell me everything, but...I'll help if It means helping judas and his friends...not to mention...more of my own to an extent.", he motioned to sunny. "This conversation will not leave this room and...for now I won't mention anything to Thomas...we'll keep this between us until I think we're ready to say something. Don't look at me like that, like i don't get into stuff behind thomas's back on occasion with wrath".

He almost seemed to be daydreaming, thinking about his wife before his compact rang.

"Pardon me, stay right here...", he stood up, heading into a corner to speak with whoever was on the other line, he paused, before hanging up and facing the kids. "So...that was Marco, Landon's looking for you sky..".

The princess raised an eyebrow, staying cautious.

"What for?".

The look on his face didn't show promise though and sky gripped at her chair as he broke the news.

"Well um...it appears...his crush is missing, and you're the only other one who can really get in contact with him".

[dotthings]

Heavily cluttered, as many Bucklemming eps are, but worth the trip. There was a lot of goodness in 15.08 and there were two moments where I shrieked out loud.

My two out loud-shriek moments, let’s get that out of the way: 

Queen Rowena. Caaaaalled it.

Dean and Cas are going back??? To???? Purgatory???? Together?????? And Bobo???? Is???? Writing the episode???????????? *SHRIEKING AND FLAILING*

Okay more orderly and sedate now. Eileen is so damn fierce. She’s a very physical fighter, she’s smart but seems to use a blunt fighting skill. She can punch HARD. I love watching that so so much. I would enjoy female characters on SPN like this regardless, but the fact that this is a hero character with a disability and it’s never a big deal is deeply refreshing and SPN did something really really right bringing her back, amen.

Protective Sam shows up and Eileen is happy to see him but literally pushes him aside so she can make the kill. She doesn’t need his protection, but she also values him as a hunting partner as the ep shows. Also they’re trying to build a relationship here. Eileen seems used to hunting solo and Sam wants to offer backup, and he got worried. 

So the plan is to lock up Chuck like Chuck locked up Amara. The sweet irony of this delights me. He tried to shut away the divine feminine rather than actually stepping up to deal with his sister as, well, a person (well, a divine deity, but still, a being with feelings and thoughts and complexities). Chuck, the arrogant and narcissistic toxic masculinity God, maybe to be locked up now instead as his hubris and his lack of empathy and his petulance is exposed. What if Amara was the more competent deity all along? 

There is no way Dean doesn’t know what an Achilles’ heel is. The random WTF of this is so much it’s not even angering it’s just so bizarre. LOL what even. Look I am really enjoying S15 but I hope the butterfly net tightens on stopping this kind of thing because honestly. I’ll just pretend that scene isn’t there. Luckily I enjoyed the episode overall a lot.

Team Free Will in research mode together in the bunker just really makes me happy. Cas is where he belongs.

Donatello!Chuck threatening Jody, Donna, Eileen, “pretty much everyone on your speed dial” as a deterrent to Sam and Dean is bearing out again my impressions of how Chuck views these characters. I’m still not 100% sure what he thinks of Cas who is right in the room but Chuck doesn’t seem to acknowledge him, except as some sort of right arm to Sam and Dean, as I’ve said in other posts, I think Chuck regards him as a nuisance now, and a deterrent to his miserable endings, and a pawn. Just like Donna, Jody, and Eileen, to him, they’re just pawns. They’re all people Sam and Dean care about, and Chuck will use them to keep his two favorites in line.

See what I did there?

Yeah. Chuck doesn’t care about the characters as people. Everyone except Sam and Dean are expendable and tools to be used so he can control Sam and Dean and that’s it. He’ll destroy them with a snap of his fingers and won’t care. Look at that. Familiar attitude, isn’t it. How interesting.

“If you want to stay here, stay here.” Dean’s gone back to not!listening to Cas I see. While Cas is Dean-avoidant and trying not to look at him throughout the episode. But both of them are thawing just a little.

Like when Cas heals Dean’s cut palm and the way it’s staged looks like he’s going to take Dean’s hand to do it which I don’t think is an accident. That moment was meant to be soft.  Dean didn’t ask. Cas offered. And Dean didn’t jerk his hand away or say no. Then there’s the fact that Cas is going to go with Sam and Dean into Hell despite all his misgivings about Michael and this entire plan. 

Team Free Will, getting all researchy together, and then getting all BAMFY together with their angel blades going into Hell.

We didn’t get any kind of nod back to Dean and Cas’s last visit together to Hell and that’s the second time they have been back to Hell (well the last time was some sort of Hell ante-room, the cage was brought up iirc) and SPN failed to nod to it, WHY AM I CONTINUALLY DENIED THIS.

“Hello, boys.” There it is. My actual shriek of delight. I hope it didn’t alarm the neighbors.

“I took it.”  Yes you did, my red-headed goddess queen of the underworld. You sure did. GET IT ROWENA. Rowena won the game of thrones. Boom.

She’s a little flirty with Sam, still has a soft spot for him I think. 

And then starts playing marriage counselor for Dean and Cas. “What am I picking up with you two? A wee tiff?....So fix it.” Someone called this, I’m fairly certain, that if Rowena saw Dean and Cas again during their divorce she’d size that situation up and down and comment on it. FIX IT. So say we all.

“Family sucks.” Jake Abel did such a fantastic job in this. tbh I didn’t give much thought to Adam all these years, it seemed like SPN was never going back there. I liked Jake’s performances in S5, but it just seemed like a story that was over. But Jake Abel, man. He comes back after all this time and owns the dual roles and made me care. With a performance that was alternately fearsome and vulnerable. 

“That’s adorable.” Dean is SO happy about Sam and Eileen, he looked so soft, and still a bit not okay because his chosen other half is barely looking at him, but mostly Dean’s rooting for Sam to have some happiness. “If it was to work, she gets it, she gets us, she gets the life.” It’s a retreated on Sam’s speech back during “Baby” about someone...something...who understands the life. And Sam has found that with Eileen.

Meanwhile Cas is right there, with Dean, with this great big chasm still open between them but...he’s there. And all the arrows point towards him for Dean. 

Dean and Cas are being magnets again. Not like in S14 where every time there is a crisis they stand very close together and are drawn together, now they’re like magnets that are trying not to feel the pull but they cannot escape each other’s pull nor do they really want to, but they can’t quite figure out how to cross the distance. 

There’s more than one scene where Dean or Cas is out of focus and the other in focus, as if to emphasize how they’re both there but not in phase with each other. Not yet.

I so enjoyed the Cas and Michael stuff. Cas’s prayer to Michael, Michael’s mad on for Cas. “Oh, I didn’t come to beg.” And there’s the ruthless strategic angel.

There’s also something really...fitting about Sam and Dean and Cas all being the ones standing outside the ring of holy fire together to trap an archangel who they effectively hope to bring in from the cold, to their side, in a post S6 era of the show. 

“To paraphrase a friend you had an entire oak tree shoved up your ass.” I see Cas is still quoting Dean, having Dean as a compass point or a North star. Even if he can barely look at Dean right now.

Cas telling Michael his unimportance to God and keeping the upper hand is just...so satisfying. Cas has grown so much. I keep thinking about S5 Cas and how despite how powerful Cas was back then, radiating power in ways he doesn’t quite do the same way now, Cas always seemed so...smol next to the archangels. Punching above his weight class. But now he faces down Michael and tells Michael rawly how it is with their dad Chuck. And when Michael tries to choke him, he fights past it and goes into Michael’s mind to show him everything, to help him see the truth. Cas has grown so much, this felt a lot like a little brother constantly picked on leaves home, grows, and comes back to find big, big brother isn’t quite as big and intimidating as he remembers. 

Which in fact he isn’t, because Michael is capable of insight and change and feelings too. He’s not his father. Despite being the favorite. Despite clinging still to his hero-worship. But Cas worked past that with Chuck long ago.

When Eileen’s friend needs help on a hunt, and Eileen goes to Sam, Sam goes with her, no doubts. Tells Dean he’s going, as Dean recounts to Cas, and Dean seems cool with it. 

Sam and Eileen seem to be growing closer and closer, and while there is something tentative about Sam, he definitely is drawn to her and cares. That tentativeness is from past hurt and loss and maybe he’s scared to enter into this kind of relationship. But they’ve got their own magnetic pull together, they fit. 

Dean and Cas facing each other in that bunker kitchen, the lighting darker and colder than usual. They’re facing each other, and each shift in and out of camera focus, not looking at each other much. Cas can’t look at Dean at all in this scene, while Dean keeps sneaking glances at Cas. In other scenes, Cas does sneak looks at Dean. They are ridiculous and my heart hurts. The blocking here is them facing each other only not--they are a few feet off, so looking past each other.

Cas sitting at that table, hands folded, staring straight ahead and working very hard obviously to Not Look at Dean. 

Dean’s reaction on Cas reporting the words Michael said, “I want you dead, get out.” The things Dean has said to Cas are coming back to haunt him, coming from the words of their once mortal enemy, that’s gotta sting.

Both Dean and Cas have some work to do here, but Dean definitely is already very aware his own words went too far, and has been for a while. 

“God lied to me. I loved him.” Oh wow that hurt, I didn’t expect these feelings. 

A thing about Adam and Michael, both feeling so abandoned by their families, and losing everyone. They offered support to each other. They worked out a time-share in Adam’s body. We’ve seen genuine vessel and angel bonds form before (in Lily Sunder). There’s also a S7 episode by Ben Edlund about the bond between a human and the demon who possessed him. Not sure how healthy Adam and Michael are, but they seem weirdly functional, and don’t despise each other and I kind of have some feelings about Adam and Michael bonding the way they did in The Cage. Perhaps Michael shielded Adam from the worst of it. It’s how Adam is coherent after being down there for so long. Maybe Adam made Michael less lonely. Did I ASK for feelings about Adam and Michael, no I did nOT and yet here we are.

Then there’s Adam. It was interesting that scene where Sam acknowledges maybe they gave up too easily. Because Sam and Dean refuse to accept it when it’s each other they lose, and have gone way over the line to get the other one back. Here Sam is admitting that it shouldn’t be just for them. That Adam was worth saving. Even though they don’t know him well, he still didn’t deserve what happened (as Dean acknowledges at the end of the ep). And Sam and Dean never mentioning him again or giving him another thought apparently, all these seasons...well, that kind of made me assume that was that. Just because someone is blood, doesn’t make you family and they barely knew Adam. 

But if it’s someone who could potentially earn that? Someone basically good? And they just...forgot about him and left him to his torment in Hell? So this did need addressing. There’s not much time to develop a relationship with Adam and TFW this late in the game but there was a start here. 

Dean likewise offers his apology to Adam at the end. “You’re a good man. You didn’t deserve that.”

Right when I was thinking, so many of them don’t get what they deserve, they just keep getting Hell heaped on their heads, Adam says “Since when do we get what we deserve.”

There’s a subtle thing there where Adam looks at Cas, Cas very pointedly still tries to be not looking at Dean, and after Adam leaves Dean turns to Cas looking so...sorrowful for a moment. I keep saying, Dean and Cas deserve each other, and right now they can’t figure how to have each other. 

But Michael left them a strange gift. The Leviathan flower, to seal away Chuck, but the gift has a double meaning (unintentionally on Michael’s part). It’s not just the tool to shut away the villain, Michael opens a door to Purgatory and boom just like that, opens up a whole doorway on Dean and Cas’s story because of the emotional significance of Purgatory for them. What they had there. What happened there. The way that place broke loose some of their feelings. I’m not sure what’s going to happen now, if they both go, as the promo glimpses seem to suggest, does one return and the other gets trapped? Is Dean’s prayer to Cas going to be inside Purgatory, is Cas also still in Purgatory and they get separated? Is being thrown together back into that environment going to help them heal? Or will they be torn apart again but that provides another route to reconciliation?

[lady-divine-writes]

Concerning the End of the World ... Again ...

Summary: When Crowley shows up for his picnic with Aziraphale in serpent form and refuses to change into human, Aziraphale fears the worst. (1837 words)

Warnings: Some mild angst and anxiety, but mostly fluff :D

(AO3)

“Oh, there you are! I was wondering when you were planning to show,” Aziraphale says, greeting the long black serpent slithering onto his picnic blanket like it’s an old friend.

Namely, because it is.

His oldest and dearest friend.

And, as of recently, his husband.

“Where have you been? I was getting worried.” Aziraphale side-eyes the serpent, waiting for it to stealthily change into human form. But it doesn’t, winding carefully through the jars of jam and honey, the plates of bread and cheese he’d set out. “Uh … is there a reason you’ve chosen not to transform?” He waits for the snake to give him a sign of acknowledgement. When it doesn’t, Aziraphale chalks it up to his husband’s temperamental nature (he is a demon, after all), and continues the conversation alone. “Well, if you don’t, you’re going to miss out! I’ve gotten a few pears from a local vendor, apples, some fresh strawberries ... I took the liberty of sampling a few, and they’re all scrumptious!”

The serpent pauses momentarily, tilting its head as if struggling with a decision. Whatever the options, it chooses to tuck itself beneath Aziraphale’s knee. From beneath the shelter of the angel’s leg, it pokes its head out, tongue flicking to taste the air. A sensation of dread creeps into Aziraphale’s chest, latches on with hooks, and stays there.

“Wh-what … what’s going on, Crowley? What’s the matter?” He looks about, stretching his own mental feelers, searching for anything not quite right in the area. Of course, if someone was going to detect something not quite right, it would be Crowley, his serpent form the best way to keep tabs on it.

Months ago, they’d both been able to convince their ‘powers that be’ to leave them alone, but how long would that last? Aziraphale naively hoped forever, but Crowley is a cynic. If his assumptions are correct, their brief time of peace was a stop-gap - a calm before a storm of epic proportions.

Greater than Satan himself clawing out of the ground? Apparently.

“H-have you heard anything from … you know …?” Aziraphale subtly points down, but the serpent, eyes locked on a point in the distance, neither confirms nor denies. Aziraphale watches, breath held, overly wary of its cautious behavior. He finds himself suddenly dubious of everyone – the ice cream seller, an older married couple, a little girl riding her trike, a corgi rummaging through the bushes for a ball. It may seem ridiculous, but if the events of the Notpocalypse have taught him anything, it’s that their enemies could be hiding anywhere, could be anyone. “If you have, you’re right to remain hidden. Best to stay under the radar, as they say.”

Aziraphale is uncertain which would be less conspicuous – a distinguished man dressed as stylishly as he sharing an intimate picnic lunch with a man who looks like a rock star, or this right big snake?

Either way, it doesn’t matter to him. As long as they’re together.

Truth be told, Aziraphale is quite fond of Crowley’s serpent form.

Maybe he could try his hand at shapeshifting next time. But what would he become? A dove? Mmm, no. Aziraphale loved doves, but that seemed a bit too on the nose. A cat? A sleek, dignified, yet fluffy Persian? Or a Siamese – all cream coat and stunning blue eyes? Ooo, a Russian blue!

But he’s not sure Crowley fancies cats. Would he want one following him about, or perched on his shoulder, shedding fur onto his clothes?

Probably not.

A dog? Yes, Crowley might prefer a dog. A big, strong, strapping dog - something along the lines of a hellhound, Aziraphale assumes, but he can’t picture himself that way. Not as a menacing beast with glowing red eyes and sharp teeth. But he’s sure he can get Crowley to compromise. Maybe he could be a feisty little Scottish terrier in a smart tartan coat, as long as he also agrees to wear something more Crowley-esque – like a spiky, leather collar. That would surely suit the both of them.

It was actually rather exciting now that he’d given it proper thought.

“I haven’t heard anything either,” Aziraphale affirms, though whether Crowley said he had or not, he doesn’t know. Aziraphale can’t speak to Crowley in his snake form. He can’t speak to snakes at all. Or any animal. Though he did feel a spiritual connection to an owl once back in the 16th century. Rupert, he called it. Regardless, he believes that what he and Crowley have is deeper – a connection that allows him to infer what his other half is thinking, even when those thoughts are wrapped inside the labyrinthine mind of a serpent.

“Honeymoon’s over, I guess, hmm?” Aziraphale says with a forlorn sigh, gazing at the world around him – the world he loves – with bittersweet affection. “I know you’ve had suspicions about a battle to come, I just … I didn’t think it would happen so soon. I thought we’d have more time.” He runs a hand gingerly down the neck of the snake, chuckling to himself. “Listen to me. More time. We’ve known one another for six thousand years! If the end is coming, I guess I should be grateful for the time we’ve had.” The snake rests its head on his thigh and seems to sigh as well – not in defeat, but more like sympathy. Knowing Crowley, he already has plans – escape to the stars, other planets, alternate dimensions. Crowley will know a way out of this. He’ll know what to do. And they’ll be fine, provided things work according to plan. But what about the world? Aziraphale wants to spend forever with Crowley, but something has never sat quite right with him about abandoning this world to do it. “We’ve been walking the middle ground for so long, Crowley. And I will admit, even if I didn’t show it, I always feared one day it would end. I don’t want that day to be now. Not now. Not yet.” He bends as best he can in an awkward position to lean close to the serpent, and the serpent rises to meet him. Aziraphale cups it under what he assumes is its ‘chin’ and rubs it’s snout with his nose. It’s scaly and cold, nothing like the warmth of his husband’s skin, but it’s comforting nonetheless. “But whatever happens, we’re in this together. You and I, till the day we …” The rest gathers at the back of the angel’s throat, huddled in a lump, refusing to come out “… well, you know. But I want you to know, I’m not leaving you without a fight. Not ever. Because … well, because I love you, Crowley. I do. I should have said it a million times – the very moment I knew. But I’m saying it now, every day, as a matter of fact. I love you. I love you, I love you, I love …”

“Aziraphale? What on Earth are you doing?”

Aziraphale stops talking. His eyes go wide. He stares questioningly at the snake in front of him. If he didn’t know better, he would swear it shrugs.

“Crowley?” He sits up, hand still cupping the serpent’s chin, and sees his husband – human form Crowley – standing before him. His jaw drops, the apples of his cheeks glowing a jasper red, brighter than twin stoplights, especially since the rest of his color has drained clear away. “Wha---?” Aziraphale looks at the black snake sitting beside him on the blanket, the one he’s been talking to for the past half hour, then back up at Crowley, who’s taken on a rather defensive stance – arms crossed, hip cocked, glaring behind his dark glasses at his angel’s offending hand. Aziraphale pulls his hand away and swallows hard.

“Th-this isn’t what it looks like.”

***

“Let me not to the marriage of true minds Admit impediments. Love is not love Which alters when it alteration finds, Or bends with the remover to remove: O no; it is an ever-fixed mark,  That looks on tempests, and is never shaken;

“Ah, Shakespeare …” Aziraphale hugs the leather-bound book to his chest, gazing down the length of the sofa he’s on to the serpent lying by his socked feet, coiled against the cold. “In thousands of years, I’ve never had the pleasure of reading works by anyone who could do poetry such justice. Don’t you agree?”

The serpent raises its head, gives a little nod, then rests it on the angel’s ankle, exhaling in contentment.

“Hmm, I do agree. I do agree. So where were we? Ah …”

“Are you reading him sonnets?” Crowley snaps when he walks in and catches his husband curled up on the couch beside the creature he has affectionately begun calling his son.

“He listens,” Aziraphale replies, going back to the book and turning the page, “unlike some people.”

“You forget, I was there the first go round.” Crowley grabs a glass and a full bottle of wine from the desk nearby. “Wasn’t too impressed then, either. Why are you letting him stay here anyway?”

“He followed me home, Crowley! I can’t just put him out! That would be cruel! Besides, I don’t understand why you’re so upset! It’s not like I …” Aziraphale cuts himself short and looks up from his book. “Wait a minute …” A small smile dances at the corners of his mouth, not easily noticed by one unaccustomed to being teased by an angel. But Crowley’s seen it a thousand times “… you’re not still upset about …?”

“Yes! Yes, I am!” Crowley miracles the cork from the wine and drinks straight from the bottle, bypassing the glass clutched in his other hand. “I find it offensive that you can’t tell a common black snake from your own husband!”

“I’m sorry, my dear, but at first glance, you two do look strikingly similar.”

“Oi! Oi!” Crowley points at his angel, stuck for a comeback strong enough to express his displeasure.

“Also, it’s a large, black snake, Crowley! Those aren’t all that common in these parts! How was I supposed to know it wasn’t you? Do you know the odds? Really …”

“That doesn’t excuse the fact that you were getting all lovey-dovey with …!”

“… something that I thought was you!” Aziraphale closes his eyes in frustration and shakes his head. “But don’t worry,” he says, waving away his husband’s ire with a flick of his hand. “I promise not to fall into the same trouble I got into with the last snake that followed me home.”

“Is that so?” Crowley grumps, searching under the sofa and around the stacks of books for the offending bugger. “You have a whole harem of snakes hanging around here, do you?”

“Nope. Just the one.”

“Ah. So tell me, Aziraphale - what happened to him, eh?”

The angel and the serpent, thick as thieves at this point, look at a put-off Crowley, wearing matching smug smirks. “I married him.”

*** Notes: This was a sort of a culmination of different ideas I got from fanart on Tumblr. There's a consensus (I think) that when Crowley shows up in his snake form, Aziraphale automatically knows it's him. So I thought ... what if it doesn't work that way? XD

[neonnhoney-rec]

Kim Taehyung

Here are a few taehyung recs, most of them I’ve read and love, some are in my TBR. Tbh most of them are smut, but some are fluff and angst mostly angst. I will keep updating this woop woop.

I hope you enjoy tehee!

Buzzed- @junqkook

you spend weeks sulking after having sex with your best friend, but a party changes everything.

863 tokyo centre-  @becomingbts

Not much of one, just Taehyung fingering you on a bus at 2am

Hush, hush- @becomingbts

Taehyung makes sure you don’t focus on your insecurities during your first time. To do this he blindfolds you, leaving you slave to your now heightened senses so you ignore your racing thoughts.

Headcase- @becomingbts

Movie night, blankets and hands. What more could go wrong? Oh right, possibly getting caught and all. Well, too bad Taehyung couldn’t care less about that.

Request: taehyung wants to cuddle but you leave- @minyoongimakesmefeelthings​

Of lace and lust- @hobidreams

friendship rule number one: don’t imagine how amazing your best friend’s cock would feel inside you. except that’s all you can think about after accidentally discovering taehyung’s kink for panties. specifically, the lacy ones you’re so fond of wearing. 

Cheeky- @guksthighs

“Want some vanilla?” Taehyung groaned before he pulled you up by the hand you were offering and took a bite of it, his gaze piercing yours before his hand was on the small of your back and he pulled you into a kiss tasting like vanilla and salt.

Tae gets jealous when you go on a date- @minstrivia

says it on the tin

Let’s marvin gaye- @minstrivia

it’s valentine’s day. and it’s due time he shows you how it feels to make love.

See you- @gimmesumsuga

Taehyung notices you at a concert, and can’t help but want to see you again.

Slowdance on the inside- @floralseokjin

Taehyung has liked you as long as he can remember. He’s unsure when the line blurred from friendship to romantically, but it’s about to get a lot worse when he’s forced to watch you date his friend, Jungkook…

Under the taeble-  @functioningishardforme

getting a little handsy under the table

Four’s a crowd-  @guksthighs

As a birthday present your boyfriends Jimin and Taehyung take you for a special stripping show, little do they know how attracted you’ll be to the officer and the acts you’ll be performing to win this new man’s heart and cock.

Playing to win- @tayegi

Taekook friends-with-benefits threesome/porn without plot nonsense

Sapphire- @writingseoul

playing video games with tae ends up a little differently then you thought

A freindly favour- @baeseoul

you help tae out before his date 

baby,baby- @hobiwonder

When you’ve run out of savings to continue on to the last semester of your Bachelors - you take an unorthodox route. Helping a desperate couple have a child and getting paid for it? Heck yeah. But what do you know - it wasn’t as easy as it sounds.

Talk- @taehyungforreal​

Finals week is kicking your ass, thank goodness you have a friend to help you relieve some stress. It’s a great arrangement, as long as no one finds out… as long as you don’t catch feelings. What could go wrong?

Clair de lune- @taehyungforreal

being rewritten at the moment

Sore loser- @kingsuckjin

It’s game night with the maknae line. You team up as always with Jimin and Jungkook to beat your best friend and crush, Kim Taehyung. It’s all fun and games until this time he gets mad and decides to play a little game with just the two of you alone in his room.

Plan V- @taesbetch

When y/n can’t seem to find love she turns to her playboy best friend to help her find someone to lose her virginity too. However, fate has other plans 

Breath of spring- @cupofteaguk

he works with color all day, but you just might be the brightest thing he’s ever laid his eyes on.

Corruption- @95boysbe

DOM tae takes your virginity 

Laundry day- @hobidreams

taehyung discovers the surprise you left for him.

I belong to you - @jessikahathaway

you have rare blood, a deadly secret in the world that's run by vampires. Your family learns the risk the hard way and when your taken away to the highest ranking vampires in the world, your shocked at the decision you have to make, but its okay as one vampire in particular takes your fancy.

Obsidian- @kpopfanfictrash

The world of magic is divided into dark and light, witches and warlocks, choice and fate. You’re a prodigy of light, a witch who works within the police force. You’ve heard of Taehyung in passing, spoken in whispers as the warlock of dark who has the world holding it’s breath.  All this changes on the night you’re assigned as security for a mysterious singer named V and you come face to face with Taehyung himself. What happens after that might be fate. (so good guys)

Silk and skin- @kpopfanfictrash

You and your boyfriend, Taehyung, are playing a game of truth or dare when a very distinctive kink emerges from the fray.

Drawing darcy- @kpopfanfictrash

Tae loves taking random photos of you secretly, and one day when you’re looking through his phone you find out 

Impatient- @bxebxee

You are honor-bound to do your duty as a princess and marry for the good of the kingdom.  Marriage, like many things in your life, is meant to serve a purpose.  But you know you should be grateful because there are far worse fates than being engaged to marry Prince Taehyung.

Coming home- @taetaesource

Taehyung as a single parent. He was looking for a babysitter to help him raise his kid and then he met you. 

Heart is where home is- @gukyi

somehow, when you woke up this morning, you didn’t really picture yourself falling in love with the attractive, well-read traveller sitting next to you on the plane, but a missed connection and an alarming amount of hand-holding later, you find that you both get a lot more than what you paid for.

Can you see my pulse- @rohobi​

You fell in love with Kim Taehyung during Medical School. Now living totally different lives in completely different hospitals, you’re pulled together again as if by fate during a code black when someone plants a bomb in your hospital. 

when you least expect it- @johobi

You’re in love with your childhood friend, Taehyung. The problem is, you treasure your friendship with him far too much to ever risk losing it. Oh, and he’s quite the Casanova. At your wits’ end with feelings you can no longer hide as diligently as you once did, you ask him to set you up with someone, anyone, in a last ditch attempt to avoid a heartbreaking conversation. 

Electric lovers- @submissive-bangtan

An epidemic breaks out. The world is plunged into chaos. One giant corporation seizes its chance and puts you into quarantine, promising to heal the symptoms you begin to show. Just before you agree to undergo the crucial surgery, an android named Taehyung reveals the truth about the illness to you. A truth that makes you want to escape with him.

Babysitter- @kz-i-co

You were visiting home for the weekend to find out that your parents have hired a new babysitter. (jjk version aswell)

Shy lover- @squishyjiminnie

You’re popular and he’s painfully shy, he acts like he hates you but what if he thinks a lot more of you than you think?

Tempting- @kinktae

Y/N is an angel and a good one at that. She steers clear of the seven deadly sins, especially lust. She is out performing her duties when she runs into a demon. Luckily for her, that demon, Taehyung, doesn’t seem to buy into that whole “Angels and Demons are sworn enemies” idea. But unluckily for her, Taehyung just so happens to be the very embodiment of sin. Especially lust.

Or, “For someone who is meant to be so pure, you sure are dirty, angel.”

Who cares- @floralseokjin

what happens when Taehyung falls for someone who’s already taken? Can he control his feelings or will they take over and render him powerless? In the end is it all her fault or his…? 

Wings- @bangtangurlarmy

He tells to nobody in particular as to why he is on Earth.

Third boy is the charm- @sangsanghaebwa

With Namjoon as your sweetheart roommate and Jimin as your adorable bestfriend, who you openly crush on, things still somehow remained easy, until Taehyung entered your life.

Fifteen minutes- @btssmutgalore

you don’t do dates - all you give guys is fifteen minutes to see if they can impress you, and Taehyung’s fifteen minutes have just started.

The counselor- @dom-joonie

You’ve been feeling a bit…depressed. At your friends recommendation, you go to see a counselor, but…he’s a lot more than you expected.

Enemy- @btssmutgalore

Taehyung may be cocky, but he has every reason to be. After all, he never gets turned down by women – at least not until he meets you.

Pluto- @katobobato

y/n has always had a knack for getting herself into trouble. She is no stranger to danger, what with being a member of one of the biggest gangs in the country. Not only is she a member but she is dating their leader, Jeon Jungkook. Things get heated, however, when she is abducted by a rival gang that hopes to use her as a way to get to Jungkook. Will her kidnapper, the ruthless Kim Taehyung himself, be able to subdue the snarky gangster or will she put up a fight to the end?

“134340?“.

Begin again- @writtenyoongi

things had been tough since your divorce from yoongi, you were still heartbroken over losing him whilst trying to balance being a single mother and providing the best you could for your daughter. when kim taehyung enters your life you start to learn how to love again, but the beautiful man is not without his own source of heartbreak.

Curious- @honeymoonjin

Taehyung confides in you and your boyfriend Yoongi that he might be bi, and the two of you offer to let him experiment with you to find out.

Upstream colour- @honeymoonjin

welcome to the first Upstream Colour drabble! please do not read this until after you finish UC, which is available to read here. Word count of this is 426. Mentions of sexual content, non-explicit. Otherwise it’s just fluff. Taehyung x reader

Somebody else- @jamaisjoons​

yoongi doesn’t want you anymore. but he can’t stand watching you with someone else.

Multiverse- @jungkookiebus

what if…what if you found a tear in the universe? in a world where parallel universes seemingly don’t exist, there appears to be an overlap. what you had previously believed to be a haunting has now turned into something else, something tangible. everything you thought you knew about reality is about to be upturned and crumbled like a house of cards. 

Stealing the bite- @wildernessuntothemselves

In a world populated by the supernatural, witches were the most despised and mistrusted of creatures. Everyone desired to make use of their powers but no one was willing to be seen openly conferring with them. And so there came to pass a heinous practice: Small covens of witches were isolated and kept under wraps in every kingdom, to be utilized when needed, and kept under close watch to prevent them from rebelling. Growing up in a kingdom ruled by werewolves, abuse and scorn were a fact of life, but you were determined to put an end to it. You devised a devious plan to gain power, and it involved a certain prince.

Clandestine- @ditzymax​

As a professional assassin, Kim Kinsoo has many shrouded secrets in her life. Some of them she shares openly with her loving boyfriend, but there are other things he must never know…

Insomnia- @hobiwonder​

this is being rewritten

Dirty dishes- @jaysdimples​

when your boyfriend can’t seem to keep his hands to himself so he stirs up a little trouble in the kitchen while everyone else is a few feet away in the next room

Dalliance- @jvnghxope​

The Association sends you to your first mission alone and you encounter a Pureblood ⎯a race you believed were extinct⎯  who is in the mood to play.

Freak- @kissmetae​

your crush on your best friend was obvious and so was his. but as you took the next step together things turned out completely different. an accident caused an unbreakable bond and you found out about the secret he had kept from you for so long. a secret that put you in danger, forcing you to run away from him. 

but the bond brought with it more than you both thought... to put it charmingly, your blood thirsty lover was thirsty for far more than just blood and the world you once knew turned into something completely different

Lavender flowers- @kissmetae​

it all started when your boyfriend starting showing weird and abnormal behaviour...

at first it wasn't anything beyond the ordinary but as it gradually got worse and worse you were getting really worried...he couldn’t sleep and kept waking up in the middle of the night. but one morning was worse than others... and it would be the start of new encounters and a big change for both you... 

Freedom- @tayegi​

fleeing form your wedding you get into a little trouble with a certain vampire

Hung, open the door- @gotmetalkinginmysleep​

You’ve been keeping the boys awake with your moaning for months thanks to Yoongi. Tae and Jungkook want to find out why.

The doms next door- @tatertotthethot​

in which you unknowingly accept the offer to become a tattoo model for the two, sexually-crazed men next door.

Once bitten, twice shy- @pbandjk​

You met Taehyung in college and he convinces you to move to his hometown with him. The town is nice, Taehyung’s friends are great, and you get along with everyone except Jungkook. You can’t seem to figure out what you’ve done to make him not like you, and why did you care so much? Also, why did none of them ever get cold?

Push your buttons- @littlemisskookie​

You return to your childhood home in an attempt to uncover your past, despite the fact it seems as though everyone’s determined to keep it hidden.

Sehebon- @httpjeon​

you find yourself on izo huen, home to the sehebon. luckily for you, you’ve arrived at an interesting time.

Thursday night- @sinsforjeon​

You do a lot of things on a Thursday night but what you were doing right now was something you weren’t used to, not that you were complaining.

Flower arrangements- @iq-biased​

From the moment you met Taehyung, his flourish for life drew you in completely. It wasn’t long before you fell head over heals for the tattoo artist who was so wrong for you, it felt right. But your story hasn’t always been an easy one, and just recently it’s become a whole lot more complicated… 

Overworked and sequel- @iq-biased​ 

A stressful weak teaching has you turning to your colleague for help. 

Wrapped around- @jjkfire​

Freshman year was a mess and sophomore year doesn’t seem to be looking too good either. You know boys like them are no good for you but maybe they’re just your kind of type

Summerboy- @koyamuses​

In the mid-July heat, you find yourself unable to tear your gaze from the pool boy, whose skin glistens beneath rivulets of water as he sets about to clean your pool.

The talk- @kittae​

A drabble series where Taehyung is a successful artistic erotica actor but has to expand his areas of expertise in the rapidly evolving world of adult film. Lost and inexperienced in everything that doesn’t involve classy settings, flattering lighting and romantic scripts, he basically has to start from scratch to make it in the online porn community. As a highly demanded A-lister in that community, you take him under your wings (or better yet, between your legs).

Always together- @kittae​

having a romantic night with your life long lover and friend

New tricks- @geniuslab​

When your newly adopted puppy turns out to be a lot more work than you expected, a cute dog trainer comes to the rescue. You soon become friends, but you begin to realize friendship might not be all you want.

Try my luck- @drquinzelharleen​

When your sister passed away a few years ago you took in her two kids, Yoongi and Jimin. You were happy to do it. Now Jimin was going into kindergarten and you were so worried. But when Jimin comes home talking about his new kindergarten teacher, Taetae everyday. You start to wonder who this man is. Turns out he was just what your little family needed. ​

Slip through the seams- @deerguk​

your locomotion is not that of a normal human being, rather it is to extent of physically being able to transport from one place to another. normally, your seams slip you into locations that you are familiar with, but when you unexpectedly happen upon the apartment of Kim Teahyung in Seoul, south korea- your ability that you have always deemed a curse begins to feel more like a blessing in disguise

Lucy- @gamerguk​

after reading a few more titles of the videos you’ve uploaded, taehyung has come to the conclusion that you’re the hottest fucking dumbass he’s ever seen and so desperately wants to fuck.

The roommate- @jjungkookislife​

y/n is desperate to find a place to live in her city when her best friend, jimin suggests she moves in with his friend Jungkook (poly au)

Addicted to your touch- @jjungkookislife​

spending valentines with your boyfriends

change- @junghelioseok​

a kind, handsome stranger makes you question your deteriorating relationship

Heaven- @pjm-com​

Being an angel who is dating a demon wasn’t easy in your community especially when everyone weighs in. 

​Petals- @katobobato​

Every day the same boy with fluffy brown hair steps foot into y/n’s flower shop. He never buys any of the flowers, no, he just takes his time inspecting them all, taking in the heavenly scents. One day, however, he doesn’t come in. y/n wonders what happened to him until she bumps into him on her way home, surrounded by dying plants.

“The flowers get sad when you don’t look after yourself“.

Dick and go- @jeonggukingdom​

It was all shits and giggles when you and Taehyung were desperate seniors in High School, having no idea what to do with your lives, wondering if you’d ever find a decent job or even graduate in the first place. It is not so funny anymore when you come home from the big city to enjoy your vacation time and you find his sex-shop right in front of the house you grew up in when you were a kid. “If nothing works out I’m just gonna open a sex shop and call it something obnoxious like ‘Dick on the Go’ or something with a stupid zucchini logo flashing on top of the building.” He had said one time. Shit, you had no idea he actually meant it.

All that is gold- @winetae​

As a college student struggling to make ends meet, Taehyung resorts to a less than ethical method to satisfy his appetite for expensive treats. The last thing he wants is for you to find out how he acquires the Gucci in his closet… however this proves to be difficult when you are his roommate.

↳ or : Taehyung is a sugar baby and somehow thinks he can keep this a secret

[hamiltongolfcourses]

The Best Quotes on Fatherhood

Fathers tend to be taken for granted.

We invariably make more of a fuss over Mom on Mother’s Day than Dad on Father’s Day, for one.

Dads are like a steady but less sentimentalized institution — the sun in our familial sky that warms and gives life but isn’t much thought about unless he goes missing.

Yet this belies the enormous impact fathers truly have on their children; while a dad’s nurturing may often take the form of playful roughhousing and silly jokes, his influence is quite serious and significant: the presence of a loving father greatly increases a child’s chances of success, confidence and resilience, physical and mental well-being, and yes, quite naturally, their sense of humor.

One of the manifestations of the way we take fathers for granted is that there exist many more quotes about Mom than dear old Dad (and even fewer about fathers and daughters). To make more accessible those great pearls of wisdom that do exist, we searched high and low for the very best, and created this ultimate treasury of quotes about fatherhood. These short quotations provide great prompts for reflection; typically, we’re so busy plowing ahead that we don’t pause to look up and get a “birds-eye” perspective on things — taking the time to ponder what our own dads meant to us, and the way we’re shaping, and should be savoring, our kids right now.

Quotes About Fatherhood

“You don’t raise heroes, you raise sons. And if you treat them like sons, they’ll turn out to be heroes, even if it’s just in your own eyes.” –Walter M. Schirra, Sr.

“Some dads liken the impending birth of a child to the beginning of a great journey.” –Marcus Jacob Goldman

“One father is more than a hundred schoolmasters.” –George Herbert

“Sherman made the terrible discovery that men make about their fathers sooner or later . . . that the man before him was not an aging father but a boy, a boy much like himself, a boy who grew up and had a child of his own and, as best he could, out of a sense of duty and, perhaps love, adopted a role called Being a Father so that his child would have something mythical and infinitely important: a Protector, who would keep a lid on all the chaotic and catastrophic possibilities of life.” –Tom Wolfe, The Bonfire of the Vanities

“The best way of training the young is to train yourself at the same time; not to admonish them, but to be seen never doing that of which you would admonish them.” –Plato

“The nature of impending fatherhood is that you are doing something that you’re unqualified to do, and then you become qualified while doing it.” –John Green

“One of the greatest things a father can do for his children is to love their mother.” –Howard W. Hunter

“To a father growing old nothing is dearer than a daughter.” –Euripides

“If there is any immortality to be had among us human beings, it is certainly only in the love that we leave behind. Fathers like mine don’t ever die.” –Leo Buscaglia

“That is the thankless position of the father in the family—the provider for all, and the enemy of all.” –J. August Strindberg

“Every father should remember one day his son will follow his example, not his advice.” –Charles Kettering

“Son, there are times a man has to do things he doesn’t like to, in order to protect his family.” –Ralph Moody

“A boy needs a father to show him how to be in the world. He needs to be given swagger, taught how to read a map so that he can recognize the roads that lead to life and the paths that lead to death, how to know what love requires, and where to find steel in the heart when life makes demands on us that are greater than we think we can endure.” –Ian Morgan Cron

“Parenthood remains the single greatest preserve of the amateur.” –Alvin Toffler

“My father didn’t tell me how to live. He lived and let me watch him do it.” –Clarence Budington Kelland

“When you’re a dad, there’s no one above you. If I don’t do something that has to be done, who is going to do it?” –Jonathan Safran Foer, Here I Am

“‘Why do men like me want sons?’ he wondered. ‘It must be because they hope in their poor beaten souls that these new men, who are their blood, will do the things they were not strong enough nor wise enough nor brave enough to do. It is rather like another chance at life; like a new bag of coins at a table of luck after your fortune is gone.’” –John Steinbeck, Cup of Gold: A Life of Sir Henry Morgan, Buccaneer, with Occasional Reference to History

“If the past cannot teach the present, and the father cannot teach the son, then history need not have bothered to go on, and the world has wasted a great deal of time.” –Russell Hoban

“There are many kinds of success in life worth having. It is exceedingly interesting and attractive to be a successful business man, or railway man, or farmer, or a successful lawyer or doctor; or a writer, or a President, or a ranchman, or the colonel of a fighting regiment, or to kill grizzly bears and lions. But for unflagging interest and enjoyment, a household of children, if things go reasonably well, certainly makes all other forms of success and achievement lose their importance by comparison.” –Theodore Roosevelt

“Father!—To God Himself we cannot give a holier name.” –William Wordsworth

“We think our Fathers Fools, so wise we grow; Our wiser Sons, no doubt, will think us so.” –Alexander Pope

“His values embraced family, reveled in the social mingling of the kitchen, and above all, welcomed the loving disorder of children.” –John Cole

“Children are a poor man’s riches.” –English proverb

“It is easier to build strong children than to repair broken men.” –Frederick Douglass

“A girl’s father is the first man in her life, and probably the most influential.” –David Jeremiah

“Fathers, like mothers, are not born. Men grow into fathers and fathering is a very important stage in their development.” –David Gottesman

“Father of fathers, make me one,

A fit example for a son.”

–Douglas Malloch

“I believe that what we become depends on what our fathers teach us at odd moments, when they aren’t trying to teach us. We are formed by little scraps of wisdom.” –Umberto Eco

“My father used to play with my brother and me in the yard. Mother would come out and say, ‘You’re tearing up the grass.’ ‘We’re not raising grass,’ Dad would reply. ‘We’re raising boys.’” –Harmon Killebrew

“Until you have a son of your own . . . you will never know the joy beyond joy, the love beyond feeling that resonates in the heart of a father as he looks upon his son. You will never know the sense of honor that makes a man want to be more than he is and to pass something good and hopeful into the hands of his son. And you will never know the heartbreak of the fathers who are haunted by the personal demons that keep them from being the men they want their sons to be.” –Kent Nerburn

“When my son looks up at me and breaks into his wonderful toothless smile, my eyes fill up and I know that having him is the best thing I will ever do.” –Dan Greenberg

“Being a great father is like shaving. No matter how good you shaved today, you have to do it again tomorrow.” –Reed Markham

“It is easier for a father to have children than for children to have a real father.” –Pope John XXIII

“When I looked at you first I saw not your mother and me, but your two grandfathers . . . and, as my father, whom I loved a great deal, had died the year before, I was moved to see that here, in you, he was alive.” –Peter Carey

“Dads are most ordinary men turned by love into heroes, adventurers, story-tellers, and singers of song.” –Pam Brown

“‘Father’ is the noblest title a man can be given. It is more than a biological role. It signifies a patriarch, a leader, an exemplar, a confidant, a teacher, a hero, a friend.” –Robert L. Backman

“Noble fathers have noble children.” –Euripides

“The father who does not teach his son his duties is equally guilty with the son who neglects them.” –Confucius

“No man can possibly know what life means, what the world means, what anything means, until he has a child and loves it.” –Lafcadio Hearn

“I cannot think of any need in children as strong as the need for a father’s protection.” –Sigmund Freud

“A father is a man who expects his son to be as good a man as he meant to be.” –Frank A. Clark

“His father watched him across the gulf of years and pathos which always divide a father from his son.” –John Marquand

“A family needs a father to anchor it.” –L. Tom Perry

“Words have an awesome impact. The impression made by a father’s voice can set in motion an entire trend of life.” –Gordon MacDonald

“Children need models rather than critics.” –Joseph Joubert

“A father is someone you look up to no matter how tall you grow.” –Unknown

“Certain is it that there is no kind of affection so purely angelic as of a father to a daughter. In love to our wives there is desire; to our sons, ambition; but to our daughters there is something which there are no words to express.” –Joseph Addison

“Mostly you just have to keep plugging and keep loving—and hoping that your child forgives you according to how you loved him, judged him, forgave him, and stood watching over him as he slept, year after year.” –Ben Stein

“Life doesn’t come with an instruction book — that’s why we have fathers.” H. Jackson Browne

“Fathers, you are your daughter’s hero. My father was my hero. I used to wait on the steps of our home for him to arrive each night. He would pick me up and twirl me around and let me put my feet on top of his big shoes, and then he would dance me into the house. I loved the challenge of trying to follow his every footstep. I still do.” –Elaine S. Dalton

“A good father is one of the most unsung, unpraised, unnoticed, and yet one of the most valuable assets in our society.” –Billy Graham

“When you teach your son, you teach your son’s son.” –The Talmud

“My father always said there are four things a child needs: plenty of love, nourishing food, regular sleep, and lots of soap and water. After that, what he needs most is some intelligent neglect.” –Ivy Baker Priest

“Like so much between fathers and sons, playing catch was tender and tense at the same time.” –Donald Hall

“By profession I am a soldier and take great pride in that fact, but I am also prouder, infinitely prouder, to be a father. A soldier destroys in order to build; the father only builds, never destroys.” –General Douglas MacArthur

“The lone father is not a strong father. Fathering is a difficult and perilous journey and is done well with the help of other men.” –John L. Hart

“Children of the new millennium when change is likely to continue and stress will be inevitable, are going to need, more than ever, the mentoring of an available father.” –Ian Grant

“The quality of a father can be seen in the goals, dreams, and aspirations he sets not only for himself, but for his family.” –Reed Markham

“Fathering is not something perfect men do, but something that perfects the man.” –Frank Pittman

“Never fret for an only son. The idea of failure will never occur to him.” –George Bernard Shaw

“My son is seven years old. I am fifty-four. It has taken me a great many years to reach that age. I am more respected in the community, I am stronger, I am more intelligent and I think I am better than he is. I don’t want to be his pal, I want to be a father.” –Clifton Fadiman

“Some day you will know that a father is much happier in his children’s happiness than in his own. I cannot explain it to you: it is a feeling in your body that spreads gladness through you.” –Honore de Balzac, Pere Goriot

“A child enters your home and for the next twenty years makes so much noise you can hardly stand it. The child departs, leaving the house so silent you think you are going mad.” –John Andrew Holmes

“Every parent is at some point the father of the unreturned prodigal, with nothing to do but keep his house open to hope.” –John Ciardi

[raceandspeculation]

Buffy and Race: The First Slayer’s role as the Other

Angelique Leacock

April 12, 2017

Dr. Smalls

English 3690

The television series Buffy the Vampire Slayer can claim many achievements. Most importantly, it’s a show that showcases women can be everything that men are, and sometimes more. It cherishes long lasting relationships between a cohort of friends. It also paved the way for teen-centered fantasy and horror entertainment, like Twilight and The Vampire Diaries. However, one thing Buffy can’t mark as an achievement is the way it deals with race. The show could be a product of its time, but from the first episode, the main cast and surrounding cast are filled with mostly white characters. When the show tried to include racial diversity, it’d fail. Characters like Mr. Trick and Forrest were two Black men who were Buffy’s enemies. The character, Kendra, a Black vampire slayer, was classified as a “frenemy”, someone who Buffy didn’t hate but didn’t like either. Another disappointment was Sineya, who was more commonly known as The First Slayer. The First Slayer initially appears in the season four finale, “Restless” and her character is immediately pigeonholed. The character was used as a prop to add racial diversity to the show and doesn’t add substance to the show.  

The episode exists mostly as a dream and the first glimpse we get of the Slayer is in Willow’s dream. As Willow looks out a window, ominous music plays as she and the audience see something crouching behind bushes like an animal. The First Slayer is “Othered” as soon as she enters the show when Willow says “There is something out there”. She is called “something” rather than “someone”. She is perceived as being unlike the Scoobies, even though she was a slayer like Buffy. As the episode progresses, the First Slayer kills the core members of the Scooby Gang: Willow, Xander, and Giles. Each murder of the Scoobies is violent and animalistic. She bites Willow, pulls out Xander’s heart, and scalps Giles. The way she kills each character relates to the animalistic way she was portrayed earlier in the episode. Her portrayal allows no room for the character to grow. This animalistic entity is something we see in other characters like Angel and Spike, but the First Slayer is never humanized the way they are. Spike’s charm and Angel having a soul helps the audience to see them as people, rather than monsters.

The First Slayer’s role in this episode is not unlike other racist representations of Black people in fantasy and horror media. In Dale Hudson’s essay “Vampires of Color and the Performance of Multicultural Whiteness”, he discusses how Grace Jones’ character is used as a prop in the 1980 movie Vamps. Grace Jones plays the character Queen Katrina and in many ways is similar to the First Slayer. The only difference is Katrina is a vampire, while the Slayer is not. Hudson comments that because “Vamp’s protagonists are white, Jones stands out as the (muted or silenced) cultural other” and the same can be said of the First Slayer (134). In the film, Katrina has no lines and the Slayer does speak, but only has three lines in the entire episode. When she does communicate with Buffy, she does so through Tara, a white woman. The Slayer’s character is important but not having her speak doesn’t showcase that importance. She held Buffy’s job long before she did, yet she only communicates through a white person. To have a Black woman speak through a white woman erases any kind of agency the Black woman might have. In this episode, she has no formal name, speaks very little, and the only descriptions of her come from the white characters. Willow refers to her as “some primal, some animal force” and Giles calls her a “warrior beast” (“Restless”). In this episode, white voices are amplified over Black voices which erases the Slayer’s voice and personhood.

The First Slayer’s physical appearance contributed to how she is perceived within a show that centers on white characters. Her hair is something that makes her foreign and Buffy takes notice of it. Her hair is styled in locs but they look unkempt and seem to be styled that way to further the characterization of the character as wild. Before the Slayer vanishes from Buffy’s dream, Buffy decides to give her advice and tells her to think about the kind of “impression she’s making in the workforce” (“Restless”). The comment is supposed to serve as comedic relief and show how the situation had been de-escalated. Instead, it shows there was no respect from Buffy for a Slayer who came before her.  

In a subsequent episode, Buffy ends up needing advice from the First Slayer because she felt as though she didn’t know how to seriously embody the role of the Slayer. Buffy’s treatment of the First Slayer is reminiscent of the way she treated another Black slayer, Kendra.  They are both initially villainized and then are slightly redeemed once Buffy realizes she can use their skills to help her. The two characters are treated in a way Faith, a white vampire slayer, is not. The First Slayer and Kendra are villains because Buffy doesn’t like them, while Faith is actually a villain, but is never treated as one. Faith tries to steal Buffy’s boyfriend, kills people because she can, and even switches bodies with Buffy, but is never punished or ostracized. 

In a Tumblr post “Can we talk about the racism in Buffy the Vampire Slayer”, Tumblr user, validcriticism, comments that “if we take Buffy seriously as a feminist [work], we should be willing to discuss its treatment of characters of color”. While validcriticism suggests looking at all characters of color, limiting the scope to women of color would be more useful. The representation of Black women in the series brings up questions as to why this show is hailed as a feminist show. This episode and character show how Black women aren’t given the same representation as their white counterparts. Buffy shouldn’t be deemed a feminist show if it demonizes non-white women.

There was no valid reason for Joss Whedon to cast the First Slayer as a Black woman if her race was only going to be an agent to further demonize the character. Would Buffy have been rude and dismissive of the First Slayer had she been a white woman? The show’s history seems to suggest she wouldn’t. Adding racial diversity is always welcomed, but if the character is just going to satisfy a quota and adhere to stereotypes then there is no reason for it. The First Slayer, was just that, the first Slayer to begin a long lineage of women who fought vampires. But instead of having her live up to the standard audiences had become accustomed to because of Buffy’s work, she was reduced to a villain who was viewed as barbaric and primal.

Word Count: 1137

Works Cited

"Can We Talk About Racism In Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Part 1". Heroes One and All. N.p., 2014. Web. 9 Apr. 2017.

Hudson, Dale. "Vampires Of Color And The Performance Of Multicultural Whiteness". The Persistence Of Whiteness: Race And Contemporary Hollywood Cinema. Daniel Bernardi. 1st ed. New York: Routledge, 2007. 130-135. Print.

“Restless.” Buffy the Vampire Slayer, written by Joss Whedon, directed by Joss Whedon, 20th Television, 2000.