doomed valentines 🥀
aka what if kel and aubrey took over sweetheart’s castle ?
this is an au where if you interact with the keeper of sweethearts castle as anyone but omori, it unlocks a whole new optional level. you wake up in the picnic area with hero but no kel or aubrey. sweethearts castle is different and basil joins you for this level
the castle's main towers seem to have split into two, but the main building remains one, and smaller from the outside. but it turns out to be unnaturally spacious at times, as if the building was a psychological maze trying to separate... certain people apart
you find aubrey. she looks different, but happier. “it's like a princess' dream come true. it’s everything i could ever want and more.” she says, smiling at you. “now... all i need left is my lovely prince charming—”
“hey, guys !!”
enter kel.
“ugh.”
kel also looks different, if not for the fact hes wearing an obnoxious shade of pink, head to toe. he is happy to see you all. “everyone here LOVES me ! they respect me and trust me and all that kinda stuff. man, i feel so powerful ! im never leaving this place !”
that didnt seem to sit right, so hero intervened. “but.. if you stayed here, wouldn’t you miss everyone else ? omori, basil, me... mari ?”
“well, duh ! that’s why you guys will be staying with me too !”
that broke a new fight between kel and aubrey, but for the wrong reasons
it ends with aubrey dragging basil along with her, hero with kel, and you alone on the bridge connecting the two towers. you have a choice to follow one of them first. lets say, kel.
you head for kels tower and find hero talking with kel, trying to convince his brother.
“didja know ?? the sprout moles here love me so much they made me offerings, like, im a god or something ! pretty cool huh ?”
“..offerings ?”
“yeah ! oh man.. hero, youre not jealous, right ?”
“wh— no. its just.. a bit ridiculous.”
“...ridiculous ?” kels confused expression contorts into a smile, that of understanding. “i see whats going on. its okay, hero, i know its gotta be tough to be put to the side. and overlooked. bet its weird not being in the spotlight for once.”
you caught a quick flash of horror written on heros face. “kel.. are you saying this because—”
“but its ok ! as long as were here, neither of us will ever have to feel that way !”
remaining determined, hero put his foot down. “thats enough, kel. you cant stay here.”
“yea, thats a good one, bro.”
“im... serious. were leaving, kel.”
the younger boy stops laughing. ”...oh. youre— why ?”
“i dont think this place is anything like it seems. i think its a sham.”
kel barks with laughter.
“oh so when it benefits ME is it a sham. man, how selfish can you be ?”
“...what ?”
“you really cant stand it when its not all about you, huh ? but what about me ? what about kel ?”
“i-i think this place is affecting you. please, kel, listen to me.”
“no. if you wanna leave so bad, fine ! the sprout moles can send you out. but im not leaving. im happy here anyway, and you wont get it.”
with that, kel leaves you two in his tower. hero seems distracted, before suggesting you both go find basil
you head for aubreys tower, only to find a scared basil locked in a cell. upon freeing him, he stares over your shoulder.
“o-omori.” he whispers. “...behind you.”
“well, well.. well !”
enter aubrey.
“aubrey! why was basil locked in?” hero asks, perplexed.
“hm? well, he kept trying to leave! i couldnt let that happen, not when i was sharing my happiness with him.” aubrey frowns. “i thought he was my friend.”
basil looks terrified. “aubrey.. i am your friend.”
“hmhm, of course you are. friends dont leave each other behind, right omori?”
hero once again steps in. “aubrey, i think youre taking this too far. of course we want you to be happy, but kidnapping your friends isnt the way. this place is messing with your heads, so we should leave before it gets worse.”
but your path is blocked by kel in the doorway.
“that wont do.” aubrey hums behind you, brandishing her shiny pink bat. “no.. not at all. what do you think, kel ?”
“i think its rude to leave in the middle of a party. right, hero? you taught me that one!”
“kel..”
he then takes a bow as aubrey joins him. “so, friends, may we have this dance?”
“let us sweep the floor !”
boss battle mechanics !
you can not change aubrey or kels emotions even at the start of the battle. the only ones who can change their emotions are each other, so the best strategy is to adapt with your own party’s emotion play
there are 4 phases to this battle. a neutral state, tier one emotion, tier two, and lastly tier three, much like most emotion based bosses. between each phases, aubrey will make kel happier, while kel makes aubrey angrier. they are not made to have the sad emotion, however,
if you end third phase with an attack from hero, kel will start fourth phase with a depressed emotion instead of manic, giving your team good advantage on winning since he relies on speed. aubrey will still be furious, but its still one enemy disadvantaged
once you defeat them they will go snork mimi in your arms and you must carry them out of the castle and back to mari.
“aww, i guess its past their royal nap time !”
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Will my suffering never cease
- went to good Friday evening service even tho it's not a day of obligation, didn't go yesterday evening to Maundy Thursday for a variety of reasons
- priest manages to fit homophobia and transphobia into his sermon. Not even gay marriage. Just unions, that let ppl share taxes and have hospital visiting rights. And big bad scary surgery. Like. Completely unrelated to the matter at hand. Says SO LITTLE abt the Passion, managed to talk for 10 minutes without really saying ANYTHING. Takes Pilate's 'what is truth' and instead of engaging in the long philosophical and theological discussion around that question, decides to use it as a rallying cry against wokeism and a godless progressive society.
- my two ex best friends were there. Ran into them. + One's husband, who I introduced her to a decade ago. Like I'm mostly over that, no longer shitty and resentful, fully know that it was partially my fault and born from my own terribleness at 19 and undiagnosed untreated mental illness. Still uhhh hurts tho??? As a reminder?
- music bad. Ok I'm petty. I'll give the trads (1) point. I don't like guitar mass. I will NOT agree with the trads in assigning moral weight to my aesthetic preference. It's simply a preference, which does not make any musical form inherently superior to the others. But the triduum really lends itself to Latin hymns and chants, in my heart. My other fave church music is traditional Black spirituals. I would greatly prefer either. But just. If it sounds like an acoustic version of a pop love song. I just. I can't. I KNOW I'm the weird about Jesus romantically girlie. But I am not vibin with this folks
Literally would have simply Walked Out. Hit da bricks during the homily. But was with my family so 1) cannot out myself 2) did not have house keys on me, so I was suck regardless
Anyway I said I wasn't going to do fun things today but I'm so upset and cranky and I did chores all day, I am going to catch up on dungeon meshi. Marcille is my best favourite cringefail girl I'm obsessed with her and surely the wlw neurotic fussy mage who loves her friends will not betray me like this
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