#thedailystruggles

[thedailystruggles]

1. The beginning

Someone probably has said it before but it takes a lot of courage to start something.

I remember my first ballet lesson when I was 14. It was a bit late for me, but I chose not to care about my age as it had always been a dream of mine. And so I appeared at 4.00, Wednesday afternoon, in line with the other kids who were five, six, at most eight years old. It did not discourage me, I was a regular attendee until I left for a boarding school, two years later. I did not know where it would take me when I began. Apart from taking my dream classes, I gain a friend - in my teacher. She used to take me to the theater, to opera, so I could see professional dancers on stage. And although we haven't talked much since we parted ways, I will always remember her warmly.

And by writing this I want to start picking up the scraps of my life, little by little. I don't need you to help me - I just want someone to listen without judgment, to see a human in me, and treat me as one.

All in all, I never became a professional dancer but it was not my goal and that's for another story.

Why am I writing this?

I want to start this blog to tell my story. It is going to be a real story, although sometimes it may sound quite improbable.

It will be a story about laughter and tears, wins and failures. I figured I need a space where I can express myself freely, where I can say what I've got to say without worrying that it's going to be too much. You are free to leave whenever you want to.

I want this to be a journey - both mine and yours.

Maybe, in the end, we are going to learn something from each other, if only how to be more gentle and strong.

[ravenrook9]

GENDER DYSPHORIA MAN ATTACKS TEACHER OVER GENDER ROLE? “YOU DISRESPECTE...

[rebeleden]

Watch "WHAT AIRLINE IS THIS? IS IT IN FLIGHT? SINCE WHEN IS POWER SLAP FIGHTS IN THE AIR?" on YouTube

CC AMERIKKKA

[always-something-new-with-you]

Fine Porcelain (The Daily Struggle)

I force the smile and I laugh. I pretend that everything is okay because everything is at the moment, and nothing could be better.

I get to school and my porcelain smile is still intact.

I say hello, I ask about your night, and I feel good because I expressed interest in your well being without considering my own.

I never stop to ask myself

How was your night?

It’s always fine.

I layer gloss across my smile and I continue on.

7:30 clean

8:30 bending

9:30 cracked

10 am broken and done.

10:30 picking up the pieces, and promising myself a cry later.

11:05 conversations and I am whole again.

The gloss is fresh across the porcelain, and I am fine.

12:00 bending again.

12:01 forcing it back in place, still promising a cry later tonight to feel better.

1 pm.

Almost done.

1:30, happy, energetic and ready to be home to the sweet release of tears.

2:05, leaving.

Sometimes 2:30 home.

No tears come.

Other times later than 4:30 home.

No tears come.

Once a week, later than 9:30 home.

Tears will not come then because the porcelain is being built and tears will not work with the glue.

The tears do not come.

[oddballcattoys]

And they say working from home is a challenge! This is a typical day here at Oddball Cat Toys: coworker 1 is sitting on orders, and coworker 2 is passed out in my arms so I can’t work on orders. 😸 How do we overcome these challenges? You give them a break, because they’re so stinking cute and your life would be lonely without them. Hug your cat a lot too. They’ll be hiding from you soon. Hehehe . . . #workingfromhome #stayathome #furrycoworker #workingcat #catcoworker #thedailystruggle #smallbusinessowner #selfemployed #catshop #helpfulcat #kittencuddles #sleepingkitten #passedout #catsarelife #wednesdaywisdom #catsofinstagram #catstagram #kittenlovers #tuxedocat #tuxiekitten #meow #purr #coworkersbelike #zooey #ziggy https://www.instagram.com/p/B-Kf1qAn9fh/?igshid=14nt0fsy1dw5

[djsuperwill]

#donuts #thedailystruggle https://www.instagram.com/p/B9g-o-bloHn/?igshid=1xubrygrhw56t

[happinessideas-blog]

Why be at work when you can be here? via // time to plan another holiday I thi… Why be at work once you could be right here? #thedailystruggle through #tumblr // time to plan one other vacation I believe ☝🏼️

[l-l-kristofferson]

My TV Addiction

Hi. My name is Allister and I am an addict.

This is not a joke honestly. Some people are addicted to drugs and alcohol. I am addicted to my phone and TV. Then again, what Millennial isn't? Although I use my phone and TV for beneficial purposes, there are also a lot of drawbacks. Some people such as my brother say that I don't need TV and that I need to get over it. He never exactly understood why I needed the TV on for so long. Some of my friends who have visited see that my TV is always on or I am constantly texting. I will go into why to further clarify why I do these things. There are two if not three reasons as to why.

The top reason is my anxiety. In being anxious, you need something that is going to distract you or calm you down. When I am home, I usually sprawl out in bed and watch TV. After a long day at school or work, I want to relax and forget that my problems exist for a while. So I see what's on and pick something I like. When I am out of the house, I usually have my music on. I don't have a lot of memory on my phone so I stream my YouTube playlist when I leave the house. It helps me stay calm on the bus or when I'm walking. It helps me ignore ignorant people when I'm on my way to where I have to be. If I am not listening to music, I am usually on the phone with someone. Eight times out of ten, I am on the phone with my mother. I am a mamma's boy and I am proud. My mom is very important to me and I always make an effort to communicate with her. I always ask her about her day and how she's doing. I feel that it will help her get through the day. So I do my best.

Another top reason is for my insomnia. For those that know me, I do not sleep well at night. I either fall asleep late or wake up super early. Those hours are usually between midnight and five am. I watch TV to ease me to sleep or just as background noise so I can drift off. This is because I can't call anyone because it is usually when people are asleep. Because I am not normal, I wake up at all odd hours. If someone does happen to be awake, I try to flag them down and talk to them a while until I can also fall asleep. That is not always the case. So I will check my email, check my Instagram, and get comfortable as I listen to the TV. So when I am at home, my TV is on from the time I wake up to the time I go to bed.

A third reason is loneliness. I am usually the first to leave my house most mornings and the first person to come home. When I come home, it is usually just the dogs and the cat. I could get home between two pm and five pm on an off day I am not working. On a working day, I can get home by three (morning shift) or get home close to ten (night shift). Either way, no one is usually home. My friends are usually very busy and can't always respond to my messages. My mom is at work or asleep. My best friend lives states away and sleeps at odd hours but it's a high chance that I can catch her away or when she isn't occupied. So I watch TV, YouTube, or listen to music to occupy myself. I tend to write at the same time because they help me concentrate.

This may be seen as me trying to validate the reasons I am addicted to all kinds of media. But I honestly can't help it. I honestly can't sleep when it's quiet, walk without music when I'm alone, or ride the bus without my headphones in. It's just hard. I try to use my phone as little as possible. But I fidget and I'd rather fidget with my phone than have people assume I am about to lose my mind. I do give those in my company as much attention as possible. It is still something I'm working on. If I am with my family or friends, I try to keep the use of my phone to a minimum. I check every so often and if it is not important, I leave it for later. It takes a lot to wean myself off. But I know that I have to turn off the TV, put down the phone, and turn off the music at some point. As I work on it, all I ask if for patience.

Thanks for listening. Write again soon.

[xanadoes]

I just bought my first bonzai and I think it's having a medical emergency. Please can someone take care of it for me? ボンザイちゃんもうすぐ死んじゃお。助かってく��て #thedailystruggle #notgreenfingered via Instagram https://ift.tt/2RfhRoH

[notdeadjack]

ugh I just wanna read some smut and Not Think™ for the rest of the night I should be able to dig something up but idk what I'm in the mood for #thedailystruggle

[androidjames]

Until you understand, it's hard being Black in America, at least these shows recognize the struggle #Supergirl #BlackInAmerica #TheDailyStruggle #RealTalk Great episode ✊

[thepastcanchangeyou]

Packed it.. then it got unpacked by helpers.. then packed again.. well all for a castle 🙈#castle #construction #construct #helper #helpers #help #alittlehelp #child #children #shopping #shop #onlineshopping #onlineshop #littlehelper #littlerhelpers #essentials #week #weekly #weeklystuff #thedailystruggle #goodfriends #castles #imagine #imagination #fantastic #fab #fabulous

[benchapmanphotos]

I only put all these away last night and now they’re back out ready for the week #photographerslife #thedailystruggle #canon #cameraporn (at Ben Chapman Photos)

[xxjillsaysmeowww]

#thedailystruggle

[djsuperwill]

#thedailystruggle #donuts https://www.instagram.com/p/B9g9prYFtqW/?igshid=17aitjo8lpqsr

[gallvin1]

@lilyachty addressing #thedailystruggle x @akadmiks saying his album flopped.. shittt looks like he's doing good to me. ✔️✔️ #lilyachty #qc #gallvin #culture #music #jewerly #lilboat (at Los Angeles, California)