#there’s not really been another pop era like it in recent years

[catofadifferentcolor]

Terrible Fic Idea #92: Percy/Apollo, but make it The Trojan War

Into every fandom, a time travel fic must fall - or in this case a second one, because I somehow got to thinking about the delightful PJO trope of Percy being thrown back in time to The Trojan War and realized that doing so misses out on a fantastic opportunity.

Or: What if post-TOA Percy Jackson and Apollo time travel to shortly before The Trojan War?

Just imagine it:

Everything follows canon through TOA, with one exception: rather than struggle to catch up in the mortal world following the Second Gigantomachy, Percy elects to stay at Camp Half-Blood. There he can homeschool at his own place with programs tailored towards ADHD children and still visit his family on the weekends - and not get into any more ridiculous situations in the mortal world when one of the gods kidnaps him or sends him on a quest to find their sneakers.

This, naturally, stresses his relationship with Annabeth - who, now that she's no longer living at camp full time, calls it the easy way out. But Percy is tired and struggling in mortal high school where everyone thinks he's a delinquent idiot when another option exists seems foolish. Percy and Annabeth break up and drift apart.

Enter Apollo, fresh from his latest stint as a mortal. He's trying to do his best by his children, which includes popping by camp as often as he can get away with - which in turn means spending a lot of time with Percy, who at this point is unofficially running CHB because it's not like Dionysus or even Chiron have done a brilliant job of it in recent times.

(First aid, strategy, and mythology classes are made mandatory. Percy personally ensures every demigod knows enough about self-defense to be able to survive long enough to run away or for help to arrive. Bullying is cracked down on so hard that it's this, not Percy's generally parental nature, that has people calling him Camp Mom.)

Percy and Apollo become friendly. Enough so that some of Apollo's kids assume they're dating and keeping it on the down-low so as not to draw Zeus' ire. Or Poseidon's. Or anyone else's. It's on one of their not-dates that they're yeeted into the past, without warning or explanation.

And so 19-year-old Percy Jackson and post-TOA Apollo find themselves in Ancient Greece c. 1220 BCE, roughly thirty-five years before the destruction of Troy.

The time travel is immediately obvious, as Apollo becomes the closest thing a god might experience to being high the moment they land in the past - being a powerful god in modern times is nothing like being a powerful god at the height of his power in ancient times. It's overwhelming (and somewhat alarming from Percy's POV, but kind of funny in retrospect.)

The specific date is harder to determine, but made clear when Hermes shows up and starts going on about you'll never believe what father's done now: he seduced the Spartan queen as a swan and she's laid an egg. Hera is furious - especially as they're saying the girl that hatched from it is the most beautiful in the world, even though she's only a few days old. It's nuts. By the way, where have you been? You missed the last two council meetings. Do you want Dad to punish you?

Apollo at this stage is very high. He's also been USTing over Percy for quite some time and is worried what the gods of this era might do to Percy without divine protection (smiting or seduction, it's all on the table). But mostly he's very high, and so to keep Percy close and safe he declares he's been off having the dirtiest of dirty weekends with his latest lover and that Hermes' presence is ruining the mood. So if he would kindly leave, please and thank you, he'd really rather get back to it without an audience.

This, naturally, is a surprise to Percy, but he rolls with it because 1) he doesn't have any better ideas on how to get rid of Ancient Greek Hermes so they can figure out what the hades is going on and 2) he's been USTing over Apollo ever since he recovered enough from Tartarus to start feeling attraction again.

Fueled by mutual UST, they put together a cover story that should hold the next time a god with too much prurient interest shows: Percy is now Prince Persē of Gadir - a Phoenician colony that will grow into the future Cadiz - well past the edge of the Greek world at this stage but not beyond belief for Poseidon to have visited, as it's obvious who his father is. They claim his mother is the King of Gadir's youngest sister and as such Persē had a royal upbringing, but was far enough down the line of succession that he was free to chose to sail east and explore his father's homeland. Apollo caught sight of him on his journey, one thing led to another, and here they are.

(Are there easier, more sensible cover stories? Possibly. But the UST refuses to let them consider any of them now that a fake relationship is on the table.)

Deciding what to do about The Trojan War is much harder. On the one hand, it's a lot of senseless death and destruction. On the other, without it we don't get The Iliad and The Odyssey - two of the most influential works of literature in western civilization - and Aeneas doesn't go off to Italy (leading to the founding of Rome, which would change the history of western civilization a lot). In the end, they decide to let the war happen but do their best to mitigate the worst parts of it.

And so Percy goes off and becomes a hero of Ancient Greece while pretending to be in a relationship with Apollo.

This stage of things is filed with angst from both parties, as both Percy and Apollo want a real relationship with each other but think they're abusing the other's trust by eagerly faking their relationship. There's a lot of PDA, a lot of feelings, and limited communication. It goes on for quite a while and would probably exasperate quite a few people if everyone in the know didn't think they were already in a relationship.

It's also filled with modern day Percy being confronted by realties of life in Ancient Greece. It's not just mortals knowing about - and interacting with - the gods: it's everything. It's food and clothes and language and culture and housing and travel. He can play a lot off it as being a traveler from the edge of the known world, but some of it has him asking Apollo if he's being rick rolled.

Apollo, meanwhile, is having troubles of his own. He is not the god he used to be and it's hard pretending otherwise. He tries to walk the line of doing enough to be believable and holding back enough not to despise himself, but it's a fine line, he fails often, and he spends a not insignificant amount of time worried he's backsliding.

And so it goes until 7-year-old Helen of Troy is kidnapped by Theseus to be his wife.

This, naturally, does not fly with Percy, who by this time has built up something of a reputation as a hero. He teams up with the Dioscuri to rescue Helen.

One would think this would earn him Zeus' favor. It doesn't. Instead, Zeus sends monsters to harry him for refusing to let Castor and Pollux take Helen's captors' loved ones captive and raze Aphidna for Theseus' crime. Percy manages to hold his own for quite a while but eventually, exhausted from the near-constant fighting, is gored and left for dead by the reformed Minotaur.

...and when Apollo arrives, frantic, to heal him, Percy ascends instead, becoming the greek version of Saint Sebastian - a minor god of heroes, strength in the face of adversity, and athleticism; sort of halfway between Hercules and Chiron.

Then and only then do Percy and Apollo finally get their act together, confessing to each other how much they care for the other and how much they don't want this to be fake any longer.

History proceeds apace - albeit with Persē being a second immortal trainer of heroes.

24 years after their arrival in the past, 16 years after Percy's ascension, The Trojan War begins. Despite their best efforts, there's only so much they can do - war is war and gods are gods. They are able to stop some of the worst excesses on both sides, but in the end Apollo still sends the plague that causes Agamemnon to take Briseis for his own, which caused Achilles' departure from the field, Patroclus' death, &c - not because Apollo was trying to maintain the timeline, but because in the instant he sent it he was angry and reverted to his old ways.

Troy falls...

...but when Zeus tries to use this as an excuse to ban gods from interacting with their demigod children, Apollo is able to say that's a bit extreme isn't it? with enough backing from the rest of the council that Zeus is forced to amend his ruling so that the gods are only allowed to freely visit their children on the "cross quarter days" that fall between each solstice and equinox (1 February, 1 May, 1 August, and 1 November).

This changes everything and nothing.

Time continues its inevitable march. Greece has its golden age before being conquered by Rome, which splits apart under its own weight and forms several smaller countries, which eventually spread their cultures around the world...

Apollo and Percy are there for it all. Persē is a minor figure in mythology, but never forgotten. He is ever-present in Apollo's temples - though the Church will later try to rewrite their myth so that they were merely sworn fighting partners, rather than lovers who eventually had a quite lovely wedding on Olympus (and then, at Poseidon's insistence, an even bigger ceremony on Atlantis). Percy takes over day-to-day operations of CHB from practically the moment the Trojan War ends.

...and so Persē is there the day Sally Jackson tries to get her son to camp, and is able to intervene when the Minotaur attacks on their border. He's able to meet her and her young son, Perseus ("Mom named me after you and the guy that killed Medusa since you're the only two heroes to have happy endings!"), and guide him through the trials that come with being a child of prophecy.

One day that Percy will hand Luke - who was never happy with the limited attention the gods were allowed to give their children - a cursed dagger so that Kronos can be defeated. That child will be offered godhood, turn it down, and go on to have a happy life with his eventual wife, Annabeth. He will never have his memories erased and be sent to Camp Jupiter. Gaia will not rise until long after that Percy's grandchildren are dead, and Zeus will not be quite so bullheaded when the proof of it is brought before him. That Second Gigantomachy is swift, well-coordinated, and fought without another Greek/Roman war brewing in the background.

And when they finally arrive at the day Apollo and Percy were originally sent back in time, Percy admits that while he is happy some version of him was better prepared for the war he was asked to fight in and allowed his peace afterward, he would change nothing about his own life, for it brought him to Apollo. The sunrise the next morning - on the first morning of the rest of their lives - is particularly spectacular.

Bonuses include:

Gaslighting Poseidon into believing that he's met Percy before the first time they're introduced. ("What do you mean you don't remember me, Father? You were present when I came of age! You gifted me this trident! Have I displeased you in some way?") It's an absolute masterclass that eventually manages to convince Poseidon that, yes, of course he knows Percy - and, maybe, he should check in on all his other demigod children to make sure he's not missed someone. (Two. He lost track of two of the others. Maybe he should be more careful about siring children in the future.) Apollo practically has to stuff his fist in his mouth to keep from laughing.

As much historical accuracy as can be crammed into the Percy trying to make sense of Ancient Greece chapters as possible. Think Of a Linear Circle - Part III by flamethrower levels of historical research. As much as can be shoehorned in without bogging down the plot.

Percy and Dionysus bonding over their mutual dislike of Theseus, though Percy generally gets along with his other half-siblings, especially the ones who come to camp young enough to keep from getting big heads over being the children of Poseidon.

Though Percy adores all the children in Cabin 7 (most of whom are born via blessing this time around), he and Apollo have at least one child of their own - maybe a demigod born before Percy's ascension to sell their fake relationship? Maybe a minor god who's later attributed a different parentage by mortals? Dealer's choice on details.

It never being made clear who, or what, or how, Percy and Apollo were sent into the past. All of Percy's oddities are attributed to him being foreign or formerly mortal, all of Apollo's to the fact that he's in love with someone who didn't die before their first anniversary, and no one ever guesses time travel is responsible for their eccentricities. Or that time travel was ever an option.

And that's all I have. As always, feel free to adopt, just link back if you ever decide to do anything with it.

More PJO Ideas | More Terrible Fic Ideas

[blueberry-lemon]

An introductory guide to getting into Sonic the Hedgehog...

…if you're a grown-ass adult who is busy and doesn't want to play a bunch of video games but thinks the characters look sorta cool.

If you've ever been curious about Sonic as a series but haven't known where to start, I have some recommendations! I think Sonic is a cool and still somewhat unique thing because it takes cartoony characters (like a Mickey Mouse or Felix the Cat) and lets them jump around in cool action sequences through the lens of a shonen anime. It's colorful and usually pretty light-hearted, and I think the character designs are pretty iconic.

There's two handy places you can start without prior context, to see if it's something you'd be into...

Getting Started: If You Wanna Read Something

The IDW Sonic Comics

There were years of different Sonic comics back in the '90s and early 2000's, but the franchise got a complete reboot and fresh start with IDW Publishing in 2018. If you're looking for the most straight-forward way to get into this world of characters, I think this is a great start. You don't need any prior knowledge whatsoever to crack open issue 1 and get started. All you need to know is "Sonic and his friends protect the world by fighting against an evil scientist named Dr. Eggman, who they just recently defeated after he briefly took over the world."

I love these comics and I feel that the writers and artists who work on it have a really good sense for this series. Reading issues 1 through 12 will get you the first major story arc. If you like it so far, I highly suggest reading up through issue 32, when another major story arc concludes. After that, the world's your oyster! Unlike the tangled web of Marvel or DC comics, IDW Sonic has a very simple and linear reading order. You pretty much just read the issues in order, and occasionally there are spinoff stories that are optional to read.

Getting Started: If You Wanna Watch Something

Sonic Mania Adventures

Maybe comics aren't your thing and you want something even quicker. These are a series of animated shorts that are lovely. Conveniently, they've been compiled together by Sega into one little video right here.

It's a great intro to some of the main characters, and combines cartoon slapstick with some amazing action sequences.

There's also a nice little epilogue short.

Sonic CD's intro cutscene

If I had to pick a single 1-and-a-half minute clip to embody what I like about this series, it would be this very simple intro movie that plays before Sonic CD. Check it out!

Sonic Origins/Sonic Origins Plus Cutscenes

In 2022, Sega released a compilation of the classic Genesis games on modern consoles. In it, they added a few animated cutscenes. You can watch those cutscenes, plus the Sonic CD intro and the Sonic Mania Adventures episodes, all compiled into one handy Youtube video.

Taking The Next Step: If You Wanna Read Something

The Archie Sonic Comics

You might have heard that Sonic had a comic series published by Archie Comics from 1992 to 2016. This was a vast, overarching series that wrote an original story by weaving together ideas from the different Sonic cartoons and games. It went through several different writers, many different artists, and obviously spanned over multiple eras of pop culture.

It's pretty cool! The fact that it was so long-running, and the fact that Sega wasn't very strict with what the writers could do, led to a lot of buckwild lore, new characters, and plot developments. That said, it's also pretty bizarre, complicated, corny, and cringey at times. There is a stretch in the middle that is pretty infamous among fans.

You have a few options for jumping in.

Option A: You can start at the very beginning and read all of it. If you do this, it is going to be like a One Piece / Homestuck / etc. kind of undertaking, and you're going to be pushing through the good and the bad of huge genre and tone shifts. That's your call!

Option B: You can brush up on the main characters on a wiki and then start at Issue 160, when Ian Flynn (who now does a lot of work on IDW Sonic) became the lead writer. More specifically, you can jump in at the start of a new story arc by starting at Issue 175.

Option C: You can start at Issue 252, when there is a universe-altering event that essentially retcons all of the characters and plot threads from the previous writers and starts completely fresh. Easier to keep track of and you won't have to worry about all the previous plot and lore.

If you want something you can read in a single sitting, you should instead read Sonic: Mega Drive, a short-lived miniseries published by Archie that follows "Classic Sonic" characters (aka, the same vibe and art style of Sonic Origins, Sonic Mania Adventures, etc.) It's really great!

Taking The Next Step: If You Wanna Watch Something

Sonic the Hedgehog (OVA) aka "Sonic the Hedgehog: The Movie" (1996)

This is, essentially, a 1-hour Sonic anime movie. You can watch it in Japanese or in English. I adore it. It makes up its own lore and continuity so you don't need to know anything before going in, besides generally knowing a one-sentence synopsis of who Sonic, Tails, and Dr. Robotnik are. It's action-packed, well-animated, and has great music. Enjoy! Sonic X If you're enjoying what you've seen so far, and you want something much, much longer...there's an official 78-episode anime adaptation of Sonic called Sonic X. It's an original story that loosely pulls together some ideas from a few of the games. It's mostly intended for a younger audience, but I hear if you watch it in the original uncut Japanese, it feels a little less "for kids."

Other Ways To Get Into Sonic

There's some great video essays on Youtube about the series!

Professional animator Dan Floyd did an in-depth video looking at the highs and lows of Sonic character animation in the games starting from Sonic 1 up through Sonic Forces.

Super Bunnyhop plays through the first level of a bunch of Sonic games to compare how the mechanics, physics, and level design feel throughout the games' history.

Liam Triforce has a great deep dive on the franchise's music.

You can play The Murder of Sonic the Hedgehog, a murder-mystery-party themed visual novel put out by Sega. It's nice and short, so you can finish it in an afternoon.

If you haven't seen them already, you can check out the live-action/animated hybrid films Sonic 1 and Sonic 2 featuring Ben Schwartz and Jim Carrey, they're pretty good. That Sonic Prime cartoon that's currently on Netflix is pretty good too.

This may sound strange, but honestly you might enjoy poring over the sprite sheets from the old games. In particular, I really like the sprite animations from the GBA games, like Sonic Advance and Sonic Battle.

Sega is pretty lax about allowing noncommercial fan games, so there's at least a hundred different Sonic fan games out there by hobbyist developers. Check out the Sonic Amateur Games Expo and the Sonic Fan Games HQ.

You can watch LPs or cutscene compilations of the games on Youtube! If you watch Sonic Adventure, Sonic Adventure 2, and Sonic Heroes, you'll get a crash course on most of the characters.

And finally, of course...you can play the games if you want to! There's a number of them that are available on Steam, Switch, Xbox, and Playstation if you don't have access to older consoles.

There's a lot of different angles to come at Sonic as a franchise, and lots of different entry points. Have fun!

[popculturebuffet]

The Book of Bill Review: Bye Everyone He'll Remember You All in Therapy (Comission for Emma Fici)

Hello all you happy people and man it's good to be back. After a week's vacation i'm recharged and ready to plunge back into reviewing stuff. For those of you new here i'm Jake, I review various media , mostly cartoons and comics.

Over a week off filled with batman, persona 5, more batman, Truthful Timmy the Blowjob Queen of Saskatoon, and more, I picked up a certain book since my money dropped: Yes folks thanks to a generous friend who also enjoyed the hell out of this book it's time to talk about mildly curesed new york times #1 bestseller The Book of Bill.

The Book of Bill is the latest in something Disney has been doing for a while, some of the only merch they really make for their telveision animation series: Journals! Specifically books following a character from the show in the first person and helping drop some juicy lore. I naturally have all three previous major ones: Journal 3, The Big Book of Spell and Marcy's Journal. There was also one for Ducktales I need to get at some point and an early Star Vs book, but these big three are the important ones, making real books from the show canon and not only being cool props to own, but also nice bits of canon after the show ended. Or in star vs case as the show slowly burst into flames.

Book of Bill continues that trend yet also breaks it: This book is coming out 8 years after the series ended, is an entirely new creation, and is geared towards adults even having a warning label. Granted it's more a pg-13 than the hard r said warning label implies but the fact disney is acknowledging a product from less than 15 to 20 years ago has nostalgic fans is a victory in itself.

And said victory was followed by an even bigger one with the book recently topping the New York Times bestseller list, even topping "we gotta see what that couchfucker is about just in case". This is a huge victory lap that makes me hope we'll get even more content from various disney shows in book form. At the very least it makes the owl house art book an even easier sell and at most i'm hoping Owl House gets more content now, and I wouldn't say no to Hirsch returning to gravity falls if he has another idea. While i'm used enough to Disney's bullshit to see them ignoring this obvious sign, it could really get them to take kids content from this era more seriously or at least try to get it's creators back to get more of that sweet dollar dollar bill ciphers ya'll. Either way this could be a great thing.

Even if it dosen't lead to more books, Book of Bill is great on it's own and something i'm happy to dive into. And since I know it's harder to get the book outside of the us this is also a chance for those of you outside it to get a peak inside. So let's begin as tonight it's gonna get weird.

Book of Bill is diffrent from the other books in that while it follows a narrative, the first half is mostly just bill shenanigans while the second gives us his history from when he was a baby boy baby to he and Ford's messy breakup involving live snakes, it's a small world and jars of spiders.

It works perfectly too: I forgot how much fun bill was till he burst through the page to greet me

Like bill himself the book deftly ballances comedy and horror. Like gravity falls it leans more to the former, as most of bills antics are just him being unsettling and charming as always, but we get plenty of truly disturbing stuff from his collection of heads to a mouth suddnely popping up demanding blood to this lovely bit showing all the many realities where the pines kids didn't exactly win

Also yeah, outside of Bill's fate, the book dosen't move past where Gravity Falls was on the timeline in the extended Disney Television Universe. It does firmly confirm it's all one universe as we get some refrences to owl house with some tapestry showing off the titan and my boy

As well as a cameo we'll get to later. But it's clear Hirsch, for now has no plans to tell us what happened to errybody after the show aside from bill himself and honestly? That's fine. I'd rather he did a full revivial or book about it at some point than drop it in here and before the nightmare fuel sets in the sleep image of the two on the bus with waddles is adorable.

Back on point the book will hit you with horror well but is maily just a non stop parade of good jokes for the first half. The framing device is simple: Bill created this book and Ford found it shortly before he and Stan went off to make movies, make songs and fight around the world. He tried destroying it but befitting spooky books it kept coming back and so he put in an ash williams style warning telling the reader for the love of god don't read more. And like that idiot from evil dead 2013, I didn't listen and pressed on as i'm sure any of you who got the book did too. I mean we already paid our 20 some dollary doos right?

So the book has bill giving the reader advice, trying to trick them and general other wacky nonsense. This book is DENSE with jokes, and there was hardly a page that wasn't meant to be truly horrifying that didn't have one on it. And sometimes even them. Highlights for me from the first half include his self interview where he deflects being phineas' father, dating a howling void and other hot goss, his entire chapter on silly straws (if you murder someone with one it becomes a serious straw), his having you murder an elf for him, dividing a number and brutally murdering it, and Ford claming he'll tell you how to turn ducks into nuclear bombs.. with Bill doing that immediately after and likely being fully aware of what he was doing.

My faviorite bits are him fleshing out his "reality is a hologram" statment

Every bit of this joke works from me from the reveal, to perfectly nailing the classic pokemon trading card style for this gag. Good stuff. Also not sure why the multiverse has only 50 hp, better not to ask.

The other bit I love the most is bill trying to help the readers love life with advice so good it got this book classified as advice

And helping the love cage with some wonderful bilintines

I"m sending I don't want to die alone to my next crush!

This section really is just a vehicle for jokes and general bill chaos for the most part and it does so gloriously. If you liked bill, your gonna love this thing and if you love him.. he'll never love you back but you'll still enjoy this.

The first half does have a few little pitterpats of lore. One of the biggest.. is that we get more dipcifica

Also Dipper's search history as a whole and while some parts I'd rather forget if my brain would let me, there's a lot of good gags here. But yeah Pacifica Northwest Pagent Video. man is crushing. And also mildly creepy but it's still a step up from looking up Wendy's instagram and other things i'd rather not get into because

This segment goes into the casts dreams, most in depthly Dipper, Mabel and McGucket. That last one is just a really hautning page of how much of a tornado his mind is ... bill BARELY got out. Dipper is naturally bill laughing at his embarassment and revealing he put a bunch of fake author images in his head for funzies.

Mabel on the other hand is one of the funniest segments in the entire book as well as revealing exactly HOW he concoted the scheme. A nice thing we get , and that explains why he gave her her own fifedome.. is that bill actually likes mabel as a person. he likes her chaos, loves watching her dreams which is creepy but for him is about as close to kind as he can get. Problem is he went in AFTER the whole Sock Opera mess, so she hates him. Thankfully the people guarding her dreams are Xyler and Kraz, nature's perfect himbos. So he simply gives himself a hat and blonde hair, a neat jacket and the name chill cipher and gets them on board by eating his skateboard. And to his horror has to do a montage from saying no to drugs to teaching a dinosaur with shades to beleivie in himselef. Just imainging bill doing an over the top 80s montage while having the most pissed off uncomfortable look in the world.. it's going to help me sleep at night.

We also find out he found Mable's deepst darkest fantasy... a tape of Mariah Carrey's fantasy.

It's a genuinely good gag and bill finds out from them how down in the dumps she are, her wanting to let summer last etc.. and thus you can thank these himbos for the apocalypse.

Otherwise the only other little tidbits are in a bit on various dreams. We find out Ford is in love with logic (Bill quips he'd be a plansexual which.. accurate), Soos wants to change his name to pins, and Pacifica.. is suffering horrible ptsd. The big bit though is that dipper walked in on a conversation between his parents about something he wouldn't hear and Bill implies it was why they sent them away. It COULD be divorce, it could be somethign else entirely it's honestly hard to tell given both how little we get and the fact it's bill. Bill's about as trustworth as a snake wearing a top hat

On second thought make that Snake mayor stat.. then god emperor.

But yeah you can't really TRUST bill but it's a nice little seed of info nonetheless and it'd be weird if I didn't talk about it. That said I don't have much to say about it. The kids parents MIGHT have had a rough marraige though that would make sense why they cling to each other so much and make Mable's desperation to keep her brother around even more heartbreaking, so i'm all for it.

So then we get to that sweet juicy lore we woudln't stop bugging Alex for: Bill's history. And this may be my faviorite part of the book simply because there's a LOT of good gags and great visuals tucked in here. A crapton of artists who were VERY good at making something look real enough, as well as GF Vetran Emmy Ciecerga who drew all the gravity falls style art for this book and deserves a LOT of credit, make this book look gorgeous. There's all kinds of styles, from 20's newsclippings to photos to disturbing bill images, all of which needed a great graphic design to it. While none of the books so far are slouches in graphics, journal three itself looked gorgeous, this is far and way the best looking of them so far. Since it's bill their not constrained to one style, like marcy's was mimicking her art style (And later Anne's for her third of the book), journal 3 was. Book of Spells has come closest having each queen have a unique style but it still held to star vs.

This being bill this book goes all over the place: you've got brain teasers, photos, photoshopped nightmarish heads, a reaslitic mouth wanting your blood, all kinds of visual trickery that fits what a visually gorgeous nightmare bill could be. Like the other style, a very chaotic style that oscelates from people magazine to several pages of the great gatsby to punish you for wanting to know his weaknesses (get gatsby'd sucker!) all without breaking a sweat.

The history of bill section is where it really gets to shine once he gets to earth.. but before that.. we adress the elephant in the room. What happened to his home dimension?

Yeah one of the biggest bits of narrative blue balls of book of bill is we don't learn hardly anything about the second dimension and learn NOTHING about how it actually died. Both make perfect sense enough narratively to work and it's clear Alex, while great about answering the shows bigger and more importnat mysteries and not just jerking the audience about, does like to keep some things a mystery. The kids parents, shermy pines, why was thor crying that kind of stuff. While I WANTED an answer for my own works, I respect that it honestly worked better to not get one. We get just enough: bill climas to have been well loved by all in the way a flashback would show he wasn't, having seen the third dimension. It adds layers to him and ford's later friendship: both were outcasts with no one at one point or another. But Stanford at least had stan for a while before he was a dick about things.. bill seemingly had no one and is active denial he was hated and feared.

So he tried to merge dimensions.. and we have no idea exactly WHAT happened.. but not knowing.. is more horrifying. Bill tries to retell it but blacks out

It's very clear Bill has ptsd.. and somehow used urkel to kill people. I feared this day would come but never thought such a dread weapon would wind up in the worst hands imaginable.

It's a great section and I honestly like this... it makes the clear bait and switch work as alex knew what we wanted.. but gave us something more fitting the character.. the one moment bill GENINELY regrets.. but due to eons of lying to himself can't admit. He twisted the narrative to be that he freed a bunch of squares when really it was his first mass murder and the only one he clearly still feels bad about. While he was likely always a tad weird, this event is what snapped him into the monster he is, convicning himself their better this way and he did the right thing instead of truly dealing with his guilt. Bill has lied to himself so much he blacks out when even thinking abotu the truth because if he really thought abotu what he did and what happened, he'd have to rethink his whole sense of self. And Bill can't do that because he's built his whole self worth into his ego after this. That he was specail they just didn't get it and it's to the point he can't even be honest that he wasn't liked> he always had ot be great and special. It's honestly.. sad more than anything. That had bill not done this or simply not made what seems like an honest mistake just not to be alone he may of simply been able to escape and find kinship in ways that didn't involve gaslighting and evil overlord ship.

Sadly he did so we find out he found the nightmare dimension , conquered ita nd slowly gathered his henchmaniacas. We find out little btis; 8 ball has a crush on pyronica, pyronica wants to fuck smokey the bear for the sick thrill of pulling it off

A

Teeth is more a team pet.. all stuff i'm glad we have simply because the henchmaniacs never got fleshed out. Pyronica also has a phd. Bill also has a lawyer named dan crabbleman he uses as a scapecrab because of course. His version of peter I suppose.

Eventually though the good times stopped; While they had nightmare dimension prom (death toll 300), it ultimately was found the dimensionw as dying and we find out HOW bill ended up here and why he hates the time baby so much. .

Now granted the section with the time baby, only a few pages.. didn't do much for me. I've never really been a fan of the time baby: he comes off at least a touch evil, if less here since ANYONE comes off less evil when compared to bill, and the only joke they seem to have is he acts like a baby but is an elder god or something. He's one of the weaker weridos our heroes encountered.

Thankfully bill defeats him and the dinsoaurs would rebound eventually

And we'd only have to deal with time baby a few times after this before Bill kills him

So we then find out why Bill was spread about history. Turns out, not suprisingly, he landed in gravity falls which was perfect for his nonsense. In 30 Million BC he found a small tribe and befriended it's local shaman.. then kinda killed that good will when his first portal created the bottomless hole, let loose sea monsters and killed a lot of people.

This is also where something clever about the book comes about, something I hadn't noticed in the show till Bill's history made it clear: While Bill CAN manipulate a person fairly well he has a huge weakness besides tin foil or techno: He dosen't care enough to hide how unhinged he is. Bill by this point in the story, after eons of self denial and surrounding himself with people who either enable him or he tortured until they enabled him presumably, simply can't grasp that maybe giving a kid deer teeth or a head that's always scremaing isn't the way to make a good first or second impression.

And those moments from the show did set this up well: i'd always assumed he did that shit because it was fun. See the "Your insane!" "Sure I am what's your point?" exchange that's the second thing he ever says. But now I get it's .. well still part that, Bill likes fucking with people.. but it's also that he can't turn OFF his need to fuck with people. Even in this very book instead of giving genuine if shallow love advice he wants you to lock someone in a love cage or become johnny cobra arms. And I mean the second one is sound advice if you've got sufficent padding or a venom immunity, who dosen't want cobra arms, but this book really hammers home that Bill , while good at praying on people's desperation... is REALLY bad at actually keeping them on the hook unless their already as mad as he is or their desperate. He has one exception in ford but as this book, journal 3 and the series all establish.. Ford is also weird, dosen't really get people or social norms. Not saying all societal norms are good.. but maybe don't give your grandaughter a gun Sixer.

It dosen't detract from Bill's threat, as Ford comes to horrifying conclude later... no one actually BEAT bill pemrenantly. The shaman simply banished him and gave out the prophcey for the finale.. a prophecy that ended up not working. Bill constnatly gets shooed away or bribed by people to please shoo, shoo good sir shoo.. but it's not till stan after centuries of work on earth that someone actually BEAT him.

But it does humanize him, even if calling him human is not even a stretch it's just innacurate, but it's the term we got: Bill's ultimate weakness isn't his ego or collection of sily straws: it's that he simply CAN'T stop being him long enough for someone to actually buy into his shit. He actually had the founding fathers listneing.. until he called martha washington hot lips. He nearly gets the US Government to get him to the president.. but can't reissit talking about how fun it'd be to set all the nukes off at once. He makes a truly fun looking silly siphonies style cartoon.. but then it's time to relase the bees

Bill for better and for worse can't help but be himself. his schemes usually drive people to madness or away. He's good at preying on people's desperations and it ultimately needed him his three days of weirdmageddon.. but but he's not good at pulling the long con and only managed it once in his long career.

Thankfully while the book has plenty of great failures from bill from his computer to his do wop group the cipher tones (And the insuing country music backlash record calling him the devil. Please the devil threw him out because living with him is like living in a living nightmare).

There's a few slightly meatier episodes: There's his days in the dark ages.. and one of the few times someone actually got the better of him: he seemingly cons a dark wizard into joining him, sending some knights on a fetch quest to get his copy of monty python and the holy grail. How Disney got away with using the full title I have no idea but they did. God I hope it's not the same copy I have. Turns out though said wizard pulled a sandman and trapped him in a glass orb somehow woven with unicorn hair. Granted it does lead to bill goign on a rampage the second he's free but said rampage gets him banned from Europe so we'll call this one a draw.

The other is the anti cipheretes, a turn of the century group that means well and is engaging.. but sadly tried to preent their findings publicly and their leaders gets intionalized. It's honestly sad.. all this guy wanted was bill out of his head and they lost.

There's also said Silly Symphonies detour where the walt disney expy uses it's a small world (not named directly but barley disguised) to drive bill out.

It's another fun section, filling things in and letting bill fuck with history. He even gets a genuinely heroic moment

Yeah Bill deals with the puritans.. and they piss him off something bad, their lack of imagination making most useless to him, their society being horrifcally stuffy even by the cipher standard of "Stuffy assholes won't let me fill a theater with bees. Charlitans", so he helps an abused local housewive used as a footstool discover what laughter is and soon forms a coven. Said coven inacts a bloody coup, sure.. but it was puritan times, this is the only way a feminism could happen.

We then get the penultimate chapter in our story: At this point it's the 80's, do a lot of coke and vote for ronald regan and bill.. is at the end of his rope. His last scheme is easily one of my faviorites...

I know disney won't because they hate merch but I genuinely hoope a fan recreates these to own. Even the 3d model used here would be appricated for printing.

But then... fate threw bill a bone: he started laughing. Uncontrollably.. lights turned yellow his image was on every computer and breakfast cereal... someone.. opened up gravity falls again.

This is where Ford comes in: In a clever twist the next bulk is from Ford's perspective, with Bill having somehow found pages ford torn out. This is great for two reasons: the first is that it allows us to see their story more on the ground.. and the second is it's a resonable explination why pages that would've defintely told dipper who the author was were missing: Bill points out Ford tore them out due to his own shame and vanity. The former was on display in the last mablecorn, with him not telling dipper and only not getting mindwipped because the horrifying experinces recounted in those pages made him get a plate in his head. The second was in the book: Ford's biggest weakness and one Bill fully took advantage of.. was his ego. Ford thinks a LOT of himself and while he is impressive, it's his need to be seen, to be recognized after being ostrachized most of his life that makes him easy to play like a fiddle before bill and made him stubborn and dangerous after.

Ford can't admit he was wrong and had he left that vunerablity in there the show might of gone diffrently and weirdmageddon probably woudln't of happened.

It also covers in the one gap the journal glaringly left out, but again for plot reasons: that winter Ford was at his cabin. It's a geninely touching story: Ford feels lonely, and bad that he didn't get fiddleford anything before McGucket goes to see his wife back home, and spotted dipper and mable's footprints.. and ends up kidnapped by the krampus and having to rescue a bunch of children because of where he lives. What's heartwaring is fiddleford returns.. and while he fucked up his relationship by forgetting to get her a present, though the shippers certainly got one with this story arc, Ford decorates the portal to cheer him up.

The bulk though is about Bill and Ford: While Fiddleford IS his friend, he's gone a lot because he you know has a life. We see a side we didn't really see too much in the journal but makes sense: Lonliness. Ford is just too dang weird and awkward to be around people, can relate and bill takes full advantage of that. We get to see bill play full on manipulative boyfriend as he preys on Ford's ego, need to not be alone and subtly tries to isolate him when stan comes up and after the heartwarming moment above. It's neat to see just how things went wrong, how Ford got played by bill. Like I said Bill can't hide who he is.. but it works here as Ford dosen't get people so while creepy as hell, Bill leaving a giant pile of dead rats in his name for his brithday and getting him karoke drunk is not a red flag. You also get the sense that while bill isn't remotely a good friend, person or triangle, Bill WAS fond of ford, he genuinely liked the guy and gets shitfaced when eh dosen't on "i'm totally fine juice" and crashes an interdimensional mexican restraunt. Also props to alex I didn't know I needed to see Ford and Bill hammered on seperate occaions but here we are.

Naturally it goes south and the post breakup is easily the most serious part of the book. There's still some great jokes, but it shows how horrifying bill can be. His first actions are, after Ford installs his lab's retinal scanner to keep bill out (since the pupil thing isn't just stylistic, it really happens), he beats the poor guys knuckles bloody trying to claw his way out. He revivies Zombies to stop ford at the mourge as it turns out he can control ANYTHING with a brain. That does lead to a really awesome moment I didn't see coming as Ford admits he's missing him.. but his aim is getting better

Yes they called back to THAT of all things.

It's then things get terrifying: Bill starts writing on ford's post it notes, taking his body at intevals since Ford let him in.. and it's something I just never thought of: while we saw what he could do to dipper, we knew it was a bad idea and he was able to get him out pretty quickly. This segment.. shows what happens when bill can come and go as he pleases. Fordapparenly would just pass out for a second and wake pu with notes.. and when Bill got tired of the post it note tag.. he went a bit further with what's easily my faviorite joke of the whole book

It's just so bill. Grante did' be terrified and probably dead from such a stunt, but it's still just.. so damn perfect.

Ford gets him back with it's a small world after all.. only for us to get to the most unsettlign portion of the book. Ford wakes up on the roof and finds bill left a tape. And while a portion of bills shenanigans, memoralized with polaroid are just hilaroius, like slapping a cop or getting a baby girl tatoo.. we also get shit like eating a jar of spiders (And as an arachnophobe the sentence I keep coughing up siders is.. a lot for me ) and hammering his own hand. We'd seen this kind of shit with Dipper.. but this is what he'd do when he dosen't necessarily NEED the body for himself.

The lowest though is Bill.. trying to call stan. And trigger warning for his next image as it's ... pretty fucking rough.

Yes Bill.. nearly sent a suicide note to stan over the phone in ford's name. It's only sheer luck and likely some lawsuits that saved it but it just hits so hard. Even as much as Ford hates stan.. he dosen't want this and is truly terrified. It strips away the wacky nonsense of bill and gets right to the point: bill is gaslighting and abusing ford, even making him forget his own name for a second, until he gets what he wants. The earlier parts showed him playing the more manipulative roll of abuser but now.. we see what happens when bill goes full on petty and vindictive and there's nothing humorous about it.

Thankfully ford got the plate in his head, he called stan, you know the rest.

It's here the book reaches it's climax: Ford contacts the reader again.. but in a nice bit while he begged them before.. he can't blame them. THe post weridmageddon character development shown in journal 3 stuck: he was where they were. Not only that while he hid the book from his family they found it and instead of turning all into bills.. they just laughed. They'd all grown enough to just find his attempts at playing them funny. They all took his embarssing past in stride. As Stan perfectly puts it "So you messed up a bunch. Guess that really makes you a pines". Stan of all people has EVERY reason to never let ford live this down.. yet does because he gets it. Everyone fucks up and it helps Ford see he's human.. and so's bill. Well again eh's a triangle man but he's ultimately as Ford puts it "A sad theater kid desperate for attention". This book isn't some grand demonic tone: it's the sad last effort of someone who already lost.

We get some fun letters from each pines: dipper and mabel both encourage the reader, and Mabel, even if she threatens to fucking murder bill if he goes after her brother again.. even offers Bill tips on getting over ford. Dipper sympathizes with the reader and also threatens to murder him. And stan.. well stand does what he does best.. promote the mystery shack. Yes even when he's not the owner he can't help plug it. But he also gives bill the biggest kick to the nuts of all: he dosen't care. He hasn't had the personal trauma the others have and just sees bill as another werido trying to steal his wallet like every other thursday in this town. Stan Pines murdered one of the greatest villians in history.. and he somehow tops that by not even carring.

We get Bill screaming STANNNLEEEYYY again, having been beaten and the reader convinced not to swap places with bill. Not only that Stan and co also figured out something important: If bill isn't dead but IS trying to escape.. where he is cant be good.

And we finally find out what happened to him. Which is a mild suprise as while it's VERY nice we found out, as seen in the rest of the book alex is keen to keep some secrets close to the chest. He teased at bill's possible return: the statue in the finale, the axotitl he invokes showing up in a non canon choose your own adventure story, that sort of thing... but it wasn't guarnateed going into this book we'd learn. Thankfully Alex, as ever knows when to not tell us stuff and when it'd be a real dick move not to and not in a funny way.

Bill made a deal with the axitotl to reincarnate. For those less familiar, all two of you the axitotl is some mysterious god taking the shape of that adorable creature whose as kind and benevolent as that sounds and even gave BILL a second chance.

He isn't, thankfully stupid.. and thus after a lifetime of lopsided deals.. just like with Stan moments before making this one.. Bill gets hit with a bad one. And the thing is unlike Stan who just flat out tricked Bill like Bill played so many people, the Axitotl didn't lie: it told bill he'd have to repent. It was bill's own ego that assumed he could scheme his way out

Instead bill is now inside the Theraprism, a maximum security dimensional prison that takes all commers and is filled with sterotypical therapy activites like arts and craft and constant group sessions. And while a tad unsettling it's honestly.. nicer a fate than I expected. It's still pure hell for bill.. but the place isn't EVIL. it geninely wants to help it's patients, even the worst people imaginable and while there's things like a sensory deprevation void, it's clearly because this place is essentially arkham asylym but ran compitently and with actual care towards ehabilitation. To let those who genuinely repent reincarnate.. granted there are options like "cloud of spore sor a butterfly" but I get that maybe Freddy Kruger dose'nt need to come back as a wolverine and possibly maul faces. Let him get a chance at that third time around.

But for Bill.. a place to self reflect, heal and come back as something powerful.. as hell. There's no ESCAPE: whatever's running this place is clearly powerful enough to hold fucking BILL down. Darcy's helmet is there too in a nice little cameo and I wouldn't be suprised if every dead disney villian deemed enough of a threat was here. Honestly making Bill and Belos room together is the punishment they deserve. or belos does, Bill would get a kick out of having someone to torment so maybe just let him do it in moderatoin. As a treat if he participates in group.

It's Bill.. trapped in his own personal hell... a place he can't escape through manipulation, surrounded by people he dosen't respect, with the only way out being self reflection and a cursed arts and craft project that was quickly confiscated before it coudl take the reader. Bill's fate was already great in the show.. but this improves on it> Bil got conned twice and is trapped in a hell he could easily escape but never will because he just.. can't grow. He won't. He refuses to. His ego can't take it. So all that's left in the book is bill pathetically whimpering that SOMEONE wil lcome from him.. but with his henchmaniacs thinking he's dead and having spent his life burning bridges.. no one ever will.

This book is amazing. Read it if you can. A truly great little followup that fills in some gaps, is packed densely with jokes, has some really effective horror and has a truly amazing ending. Check it out if you haven't and if you can.

Thanks for reading

[dragonss-in-the-north]

I’ve had a certain interview with Rob James-Collier and Allen Leech pop back into my brain after lying dormant for years - the one in which they suggest that Thomas run a gay bar, and Tom run an Irish bar, and they be business rivals. My first thought: “Oh! That would be a fun modern AU!” But then I thought: “What if canon era though????” So... uh... this is what I’ve got:

At some point after the events of the first film, Tom decides to run an Irish pub instead of the car business he was managing with Talbot (Mary/Henry divorce mayhaps?). He’s desperate to get some space from the Crawleys and find himself again.

Meanwhile, Chris has been recently released from prison. Thomas has been exchanging letters with him on the quiet for all the months he was locked up, and they have become good friends. Chris wants to arrange meet-ups with the rest of the Turton’s crew, but everyone is understandably skittish about squatting in another abandoned building.

Tom finds out about all of this because of [muffled sounds behind hand] reasons, and he’s like, “Wait! I think English cops should go fuck themselves, as well. You fellas should use the back room of my pub for your parties. We can stick it to the man together.” Thomas is... not impressed. But Chris is not about to look a gift horse in the mouth.

And perhaps Tom bizarrely, impossibly finds himself drawn to this new Thomas, who dances and laughs and drinks with his fellow gays. Maybe that funny, happy, beautifully alive man is... sexy? But even if Tom really did feel that way - which of course he doesn’t - it wouldn’t matter. Because obviously Thomas and this Chris guy are some sort of item. Neither of them have ever actually said that, but clearly they are. Probably? Maybe?

Branrow shippers, is this anything??? Genuinely do not know at this point.

[eds6ngel]

Hello love! Could you do a Steve x Munson!reader?? I want like protective big brother Eddie and love sick Steve and reader I think it’d be so cute! Btw you’re so talented and I absolutely adore you and your writing 💘💘💘

of course i can my love! and thank you ever so much for the compliments, it means a lot to me <3

warnings: fem!reader. munson!reader. no physical appearance mentions so r could be biological or adopted sibling. swearing. a lot of comedy. fluff. comfort. a love confession!! [1.5k].

You started dating Steve at the beginning of ‘85. Your Uncle Wayne had taken a great liking to him, Steve being extra polite when you first invited him around to dinner with your family. When he called it a night and headed home, Wayne closed the door with the words: “He’s a very good kid, Y/N.”

But, there was one person who wasn’t fond of your boyfriend at all, and that would be your brother, Eddie.

Eddie was a prime victim of Steve’s ‘King’ era, recklessly getting bullied by Steve and his friends at the time. So, when you eventually broke the news that you were seeing Steve, it’s safe to say your brother did not take it lightly.

Eddie actually stopped speaking to you for a good day and a half, and then sulked around you for the remainder of the week.

He had eventually gotten used to it, Steve acting nice enough when you invited him over and Wayne wasn’t home. But, just because he was used to it didn’t mean he liked it. If anything, he despised it.

So, instead of leaving you two alone when he would come over, he would become extra annoying.

And boy did he enjoy it.

“Hey, Wayne?” you ask, walking into the living room where he was lounging on the couch. “Is it alright if Steve comes over tomorrow night?”

“Course it is darlin’,” he replies, signalling over to your brother, “But, I am out for the night, I have a shift. So, you should really be asking Eddie.”

“Yeah, whatever…” he mumbles, not looking up from his Heavy Metal magazine, obviously listening in to the conversation between you and Wayne.

“I’ll take that as a yes,” you say optimistically, “Thanks Eds!”

You skip back to your room, running to the phone so you could let your boyfriend know, unaware of the conversation that was happening in the living room.

“You gotta accept who they are son, you can’t be sittin’ here all grumpy any time she brings up the poor boy.”

Eddie sighs out frustratedly, “He’s an asshole Wayne. He bullied me for two years!”

Wayne looks up from his newspaper, “Has he bullied ya recently?”

Eddie pouts his lips, avoiding Wayne’s gaze, mumbling out a “No.”

“Exactly boy,” he replies, “He’s obviously changed, people can do that. Your sister wouldn’t date him for no reason.”

Eddie shakes his head, groaning out, until a little idea pops in his head. An idea that he could accomplish tomorrow.

You and Steve were sat on the couch, snuggled up to one another, some cheesy horror flick on the TV which Steve had rented out from Family Video.

“How’s your week been, beautiful?” Steve asks with a smile, pressing a light kiss to your forehead.

“Not bad, Mrs. Click only gave me a B- on that damn History homework, again! Like, I really don’t understand what this woman wants from me, honestly,” you softly laugh.

“Babe, I think you forget that I get a C in every class, so anything above that is incredible to me,” he tangles his hand in your hair and presses a kiss to your cheek, “I’m proud of you.”

“I’m proud of you too,” you whisper back, “Grades are technically just a reflection of the teacher’s working. If most of your kids are failing, technically that’s your fau—“

But, your sentence gets interrupted by the loud sound of clashing from behind you, Eddie shifting through the cupboards to grab something.

“Hey Eds,” he looks up at you, “What are you doing?”

“Oh, I just fancied a grilled cheese, so I thought I’d make one,” he smiles.

“You know Wayne left that soup in the fridge that Mrs. Johnson gave to us. You just need to heat it up,” you remind him, your patience wearing thin.

“Nah, I don’t feel like that,” he looks between the two of you, innocently saying, “Oh, I won’t interrupt you guys. You just keep being cutesy and all that shit.”

You sigh as you snuggle back into Steve’s side, trying to focus on the movie. But, you could’ve sworn Eddie was being extra loud on purpose, slamming the fridge door shut and throwing the frying pan on the stove.

It went all quiet for a while, the low sound of sizzling being the only distraction in the background, silent enough for you and Steve to focus back on the movie.

However, that was until Eddie called to you, “Hey Y/N!”

You roll your eyes as you turn around and look behind you, “Yes Eddie?” you ask with a sarcastic smile.

He signals you to come over with his arm, “Would you say this is cooked enough?”

You pinch your forehead with your fingers, “When it’s golden brown, it’s cooked Eddie.”

“Yeah, but what is ‘golden brown’? Just, get your ass over here.”

You groan out as you get up from your seat, stomping over to Eddie and looking down at his food sizzling away in the frying pan.

“Eddie, you haven’t even flipped it over yet,” you stare at him with a deadpan look.

“Oh yeah, so I haven’t,” he smiles back at you, a smile you wanted to wipe right off of his face, “See, this is why I need you sis. Where would I be without you?”

You walk back to the couch, mumbling under your breath, “Away from me, that’s for sure,” laying completely on top of Steve as he wraps his arms around your back, yours around his neck as your face squishes into his chest.

Although you can’t see, Eddie’s frustrations are growing. How did that make you two even closer? Eddie smirks to himself as he thinks of something that would definitely get you to move away from Steve.

You haven’t looked up from the screen in over five minutes. With the grilled cheese sizzling away behind you, you believe Eddie has everything under control for once. That’s until you smell the sense of burning behind you, followed by the loud blaring of the smoke alarm.

“What the fu— Eddie!” you yell, leaping off of the couch, Steve covering his ears with his hands at the loud noise as you turn the hob off and move the frying pan onto the worktop.

Eddie returns from the bathroom, you yelling at him, “What the hell were you doing?”

“I needed a piss!”

“Well, you can’t just leave food unattended!” you shout, smacking the smoke alarm with your fist, knowing from experience that the worn out item died down from doing that motion.

“Jesus,” he holds his hands up, “I’m sorry.”

You huff as you head back over to Steve, pressing a soft kiss to his cheek as you say, “I’m heading to the bathroom, okay?”

He nods as you exit the room, leaving just him and Eddie alone, Eddie assembling his burnt sandwich, although he didn’t mind, since it got you away from Steve.

But, maybe this was worse, because now he was stuck in a silent atmosphere with his former bully.

Steve speaks up, “I’m not going to hurt her, y’know?”

Eddie doesn’t look at Steve as he continues making his sandwich, “What?”

Steve turns around, looking at Eddie in the kitchen, “I said I’m not going to hurt her. I’m not like I used to be. King Steve died a long time ago.”

“Yeah, well, I don’t believe that,” Eddie mumbles back, throwing his grilled cheese on a plate and heading towards his room.

“Dude, wait!” Steve yells, getting up from his seat and jogging over to him, Eddie turning his back as he leans against the kitchen countertop, “Look, I know why you don’t believe me, hell, I wouldn’t either.”

He sighs, “The reason Nancy Wheeler broke up with me is because I didn’t care about her problems. When she needed me most, I wasn’t there. I don’t want to be that again for your sister, man,” Steve admits. “I love her, I can’t lose her. I’m not like I was before, I’m not friends with Tommy and Carol anymore, I couldn’t give two shits about popularity, all I care about is being a good boyfriend to your sister. And all I ask of you is to accept that because if you started dating my sister, I would accept it in a heartbeat.”

“You love me?” you whisper as you come out of the bathroom, looking at Steve with a loving gaze. You walk up to him, wrapping your arms around his neck as he cups your cheeks, “Yeah baby, I love you.”

You smile, your insides burning alive at the confession, “I love you too.”

Steve sighs happily as he slots his lips in between yours, the two of you sharing a soft kiss, expressing all of your love and admiration for each other.

Eddie slides past the two of you and heads to his room with his food. Did he 100% believe Steve had completely changed? No. He was still pretty convinced that the old him was buried away in there somewhere.

But, was he undoubtedly in love with you? Yes. And although he feels protective of you after everything the two of you had been through together, the one thing he could let you do is be happy with your boyfriend.

You deserved love, and he wasn’t going to take that away from you.

i really hope you enjoyed this fic! i had a lot of fun writing it <33

[likeadevils]

I trust your opinion. If you were making bets about what TS11's themes, concepts and sound would be like.. What would you like& prefer? and what would you think Taylor would do?

thank you for trusting my opinion but i am god awful at predicting what taylor is going to do next. that being said:

i think something taylor learned with all too well, anti-hero, and cruel summer is to… trust her instincts, i guess? not that she hasn’t in the past, but she’s mentioned that those songs were her favorites of their respective albums, and she didn’t expect that the general public would enjoy them as much— at least, not to the degree that they have been. but they’ve all been #1s, and more impressively to me, they’ve all broken through into wider pop culture in a way that’s super hard to do nowadays. like can you tell me what’s #1 right now because i can’t. but anyways i think she’ll be following what she wants to hear a little bit more, and trusting that her and the general public’s taste is pretty aligned at the moment. so like, to boil it down into a bingo card prediction, the lead single is going to be taylor’s favorite song on the album

also, bingo square, the color will be white. no evidence just vibes

i think another thing taylor recently learned is trusting that not only her fanbase, but the wider pop landscape would accept complex ideas delivered with a complex vocabulary. in some ways i think she was really burned by me!— she had been taught that it’s the we are never ever getting back together and shake it offs that you send to pop radio, not the all too wells. and then me! got torn apart (deservedly or not), and then the world shut down and it’s not like she needs to find a tour off her next album so what the hell, let’s take out the immediate hooks and replace it with flowery language. and it was a massive hit! twice! but it’s not the kind of music she wants to make forever. so midnights was an added gamble— can you marry the hooks with the collegiate vocabulary? and you can! anti-hero was her biggest chart success ever! so i expect more dictionary/thesaurus starter pack memes in our future, no matter what genre it’ll end up in

that being said, i think she’ll be staying in pop. i maaaaybe could see a kind of pop rock thing happening— think like, the electric guitar she adds to don’t blame me when it’s preformed live.

regardless i do think she’ll be pulling in more rep influences— i’m not super in the buisness of trying to track down when exactly she’s been re-recording, so this is coming from swiftie brain rot not timeline brain rot, but if i had to guess i would say she was mostly recording rep over the summer and with the occasional ts11 track thrown in as well. but i could be wrong maybe she has three albums recorded. idk. i am very interested in what the rep sounds like though, i think that’ll be the biggest clue to what ts11 will sound like

i’m curious how auto-biographical it’ll be. honestly, i could see taylor creating a single character to inhabit and tracking their story throughout an album, which would parallel the emotions she’s going through, but not the exact situations. but that’s me projecting what i would need to do to process the fucking year she’s been through, and taylor has consistently been saying how much she gets from having people sing back the words thought she must be alone in thinking, so like maybe it’ll be intensely About Her, who knows

as for release, i’m a big post eras tour believer. like i know it’s been said a million times but god how impossible would it be to add another set to that thing. like we might get the announcement and lead single while still on tour, but not a full album

i’m also expecting a more talk-y rollout. i would bet we’re getting a couple of print interviews— not anywhere near 1989 or lover levels, but like, you know. rolling stone, vogue, maybe another time, that kind of thing. and in front of camera stuff too— zane lowe, a bbc live longe, some late night appearances, maybe going on kelly clarkson’s show. and maaaaybe a hot wings episode. maybe. i think taylor got a bit burned by the long roll out for lover, and regardless she had other priorities when it came to the midnights release, but it’s been a while and she does like to surprise people by doing something completely predictable. but also this is totally me being like pleaseeeee give interviews they help me with timeline research so much

i predict this every time but visual album!!! if i keep saying it one day it’ll be true!!! it just makes sense she’s been getting so into directing!!!

while we’re in the realm of things that would make me specifically go insane i just think it would be funny if she got paul mccartney to feature on a song. just to be petty. imagine your ex is releasing an album and she gets one of your favorite musicians to play on it. and after the sweet nothing debacle too. oh. so ouchie. also she would have paul fucking mccartney on an album that’s insane in its own right

while we’re throwing spaghetti at the wall. two word title. let’s get crazy maybe 3+ words why not (this is by far the least serious prediction if the title is more than one word i’ll lose my mind)

maybe some religious imagery for the visuals? i’m trying to think of aesthetics taylor hasn’t thoroughly explored. what’s coming to mind is stained glass windows and like, the wild west. this is not at all influenced by me being raised catholic in the american southwest what are you talking about

so to sum up i think i want a pop rock opera with a title along the lines of “the blank of firstname lastname” about a woman in the wild west that has climatic scenes in a cathedral?? i guess that’s the shape i want?? i was not aware that’s what i wanted when i started writing this post okay

[ducktracy]

How would you rank the entries in the Hunting Trilogy (aka Rabbit Season, Duck Season) from favorite to least favorite?

ALRIGHT, i just rewatched the entire trilogy to properly answer this! so, prepare for rambling HAHA. but as it stands now, i would personally rank them:

Rabbit Seasoning

Rabbit Fire

Duck, Rabbit, Duck!

BUT. if i were ranking on which i think are the BEST in a more objective standpoint? then:

Rabbit Seasoning

Duck, Rabbit, Duck!

Rabbit Fire

i've expressed this grievance before, but i, like probably most other people, grew up when the landscape surrounding LT was Chuck Jones Chuck Jones Chuck Jones. the hunting trilogy is the main association of the series to many. for good reason! all of the shorts are fantastic. it's amazing that Chuck was able to keep such a streak going as long as he did with the trilogy--especially since all 3 shorts are so reliant on being extensions of each other and utilizing the same formula. that novelty can get old REALLY fast (exhibit A, at least in my personal opinion: the Pepe cartoons), so it's sort of amazing that all three are as sharp and have defining characteristics against one another

however, i've definitely become victim to the Jones saturation of the 90s-00s, and the hunting trilogy has been one of the biggest offenders. i don't go out of my way to watch the trilogy often for this reason, and i haven't entirely been able to shake myself OF that oversaturation like i have with other Jones shorts of the era. which stinks! i'm very frustrated by this

NEVERTHELESS! Rabbit Seasoning is tops for me and is probably my favorite Bugs and Daffy period, next to Beanstalk Bunny. i think it has the greatest balance of what makes the hunting trilogy so successful and memorable. snappy wordplay that happily indulges in Mike Maltese's writing credit--"STILL LURKING ABOUT" i think pops into my head the most. really nice balance of funny and REVEALING facial expressions, Daffy getting his beak blown off unfortunately gets old for me very quickly but i feel this short is more reliant on finding other avenues that reach a similar goal in comedy. the lipsmack Daffy does to the camera after seeing Elmer fall for Bugs made me laugh really really hard the first time i gave this one a chance again in recent years

likewise, Bugs' introduction in that one is something i really appreciate. i'm not sure how purposeful this was (but i certainly feel it had to be), but Bugs humoring Elmer at the very beginning is a direct mirror to his introduction and subsequent banter in A Wild Hare. Carl Stalling even uses the same music cue, which is an original music cue!! i feel that's not only an endearing callback to the roots of both characters, but likewise establishes just how much progress has been made since then AND seems to even be poking fun at the original scene itself.

i also think that the drawings are sharpest in it, they feel the most solid and confident and tight. Duck, Rabbit, Duck is visually solid for the most part, but i think can get a bit melty in some spots--and i know i may be in the minority for thinking this, but there are some frames in Rabbit Fire that are just plain ugly to me i'm sorryyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!!

BUT, moving on a bit. i personally enjoy and get more out of Rabbit Fire, but i think Duck, Rabbit, Duck! is the funnier cartoon and more structurally sound. Fire has some understandable growing pains, including some odd jump cuts and a lack of hook-ups, whereas DRD has the benefit of getting the formula down. with that said, i feel DRD is much more dependent on formula, and i tend to enjoy cartoons that are a little more freeform--all of the hunting trilogy shorts are heavily character based, but i really enjoy the prevalence of character acting in Fire.

copy and pasting something i literally just sent to someone else: i was just thinking about the disguise bit in Rabbit Fire, Mel doing the characters imitating each other is so crazy good, but i also like how with Daffy's impression of Bugs, you still feel some of those Daffy-isms present. he doesn't entirely commit to the bit as faithfully as Bugs in WHAT he actually says. and i think that's an amazing attention to detail in character acting; Daffy's impulses just can't help but bleed through everything he does

i feel DRD doesn't have that same sort of intimacy? if that makes sense? but, at the same time, it doesn't need to--Fire was the first formal Bugs and Daffy outing, so it makes sense for there to be a heavier presence on figuring out how they play against each other vs DRD being the final effort in the trilogy, all the fat has been cut, now it's just time for gags gags gags. DRD likewise has the benefit of really snappy, fetching dialogue ("I'M A FIDDLER CRAB")... but Fire appeals to my sensibilities more. i also like that it's the short that gives Bugs the most to do--he still has a little bit of his scrappiness, and that's always always always a point of favorability to me.

i still feel like i have so much more to say on this and yet i also can't think of much else to say! i feel i have more to justify but don't know what that is LOL. BUT YEAH, Rabbit Seasoning indisputably takes the cake for me. it's easily the short of the trilogy i revisit most and is actually one i feel an active desire to watch every now and then. i think it has the best balance of everything and is egalitarian in where it pulls its comedy from--it's not all from the faces, not all from the acting, not all from the situation, there's a really solid balance of all

and the "wait til you get home" bit is just one of my favorite endings to a Chuck Jones short period. flawless execution. i deeply love Carl Stalling's gently climactic crescendo in the music and the abstraction of the gunfire caricatured with color cards through the house's windows.

that, and this just cracks me up

[thestylesindependent]

Seemingly inescapable whenever you turned on the radio last summer, Harry Styles’ As It Was was one of the biggest hits of 2022, and remains on heavy rotation today. It topped Spotify’s end-of-year list of the most popular songs, and hit number one in the US and UK.

The song was co-written by Tyler Johnson alongside Kid Harpoon and Styles himself. Johnson and Harpoon both have production credits on the track - as they do on Watermelon Sugar, another Styles mega-hit - but as Johnson explained to Music Week [Paywall] last year, the creative process behind the two songs was very different.

“[Watermelon Sugar] took a while and As It Was was more speedy, right out of the gate,” he says. “Harry was sitting on the Moog One and I liked what he was playing, so I sat down and played as he started to write the melodies and the lyrics. Tom [Hull, aka Kid Harpoon] did a half-time beat around it, we were like, ‘No, it’s not right.’ So then Tom played the double time beat, which felt very good.

In terms of harmonic structure, As It Was has been compared to a-Ha’s Take On Me. As John Mayer demonstrated during a recent live performance, the two songs share a similar chord progression - ii-V-I-IV - but As It Was has a very different, highly distinctive topline.

“I said to Harry, ‘We need a lead line’ and he just came up right away with the ‘Dah, dah, dah...’ part,” reveals Tyler Johnson. “He didn’t hesitate. Then he started writing the second verse and referring to himself in the third person. So much of this song just came from Harry’s heart. And then Tom, as he does, with this magical sense of hooks that he has, came up with the idea of doing, ‘You know it’s not the same…’ after the chorus, which I was very impressed with. That turned out to be a very smart move.”

The song came together quickly, then: “Really, the record was about where it’s at now after three or four days,” Johnson recalls. “It didn’t go through a lot of [changes], there was never anything drastic. I had a guitarist friend, Doug Showalter, add electric guitars and some transition sounds. Then we got the tubular bells - another Harry idea - and I’ve got a video of him playing those. We had Mitch Rowland come in to do some live drums. We chopped those up for the ending to give it a more bombastic feeling.”

The best thing about As It Was is just how effortless it is, how it just flows over you and gives you a good energy.

Having a real drummer, it turns out, is important for Johnson, Harpoon and Styles. “For As It Was, we were thinking 2008-2012 indie rock, MGMT, Phoenix, Passion Pit. We want to be referential and for the music to sound familiar, but our process is that we don’t do as much drum programming as live drums. That’s what people in that era were doing to make things sound big, but not too programmed. Our engineer Jeremy Hatcher really helped shape that, those drum tones are unique in pop.”

Speaking to Rolling Stone, Kid Harpoon threw another influence on As It Was into the mix: “I’m sitting there on the drums and I was like, oh, this could have a Strokes kind of vibe,” he said. However, while he acknowledges the debt that As It Was owes to other artists and songs, he also firmly believes that it has its own identity.

"You get to the end and you hear it and you go, oh, it’s got the sort of A-ha references and the Strokes references and maybe there’s a bit of Talking Heads in there and then it becomes something bigger than the sum of its parts.”

Perhaps the relaxed vibe of As It Was stems from the fact that it was recorded in the living room in the home of A&R man Rob Stringer’s house, a place conducive to chilling out, you would have thought.

“The living room was actually a very perfect size for a control room, nice and tight but kinda long,” notes Tyler Johnson. “The back of it had a couch, an upright piano and windows that looked out over some fields, and in the front we had the desk. We rented a ton of gear, all the walls were lined with preamps and compressors. Even though we were going kind of bedroom-y, Tom and I just love lots of microphones and we do live drums, analogue synthesisers, multiple guitar amps… We love that whole element to recording.”

It was Styles, it turns out, who pushed for As It Was to be his album’s lead single. A wise move, it turns out, given its subsequent success.

“The best thing about As It Was is just how effortless it is, how it just flows over you and gives you a good energy,” thinks Tyler Johnson. “It has a gentle conversation with the listener while being upbeat. It’s easy to consume, but it still has depth and Harry brings so much character to it. Really, pop is just about people living life with music to garnish it.”

[laurolive]

Why Paul McCartney Still Tours: Part 3 - A Tinge of Sadness

Another Essay

A Daily Mail article (see article here) about McCartney’s continued touring prompted some reader comments.

Part 1 (here): One reader’s granddad ties McCartney’s happiness on stage to his memories of Linda.

Part 2 (here): I mused on granddad’s opinion and found merit in it from McCartney’s own words.

____________________________________________

While describing Linda’s photos and the memories they evoke, McCartney said that the main emotion of joy can be “tinged with sadness because you lost that person…” (The Times 2011)

McCartney has made it clear that he absolutely enjoys touring and playing music live. He must crave the excitement of a concert, the happy memories, the symbiosis with the audience, the cheering and applause that feed his ego. But what about when the tour is over and he is at home? Is there a tinge of sadness ? Does it linger a little more as the years advance further from his prime?

And what about the concert goers who get emotional and teary? I would think that there is a mix of joy and sadness in those tears — sadness for McCartney’s band mates who are gone, for time that can’t be turned back to re-experience the Beatles or Wings in their heyday, for the music of bygone eras.

We have looked at the joy; now let’s take a look at that tinge of sadness for performer and audience.

Wistful Regression: Beatlemania Ain’t Never Coming Back

In advanced age, one has accumulated a past. One feels blessed, grateful even; one has fond memories. That’s not to say there are no more positives in the present, or that memories don’t bring joy; but inherent in the recollection is the somberness of our being bound to linear time. Those past experiences play like a movie in one’s mind. The scenes have already been filmed. One can’t viscerally touch and feel and hold onto them ever again. Beatlemania ain’t never coming back.

Although McCartney enjoys performing and the ticket buyers enjoy his concerts, there is a wistful regression lurking on the periphery of these live shows: a musician in his 80s immersing himself in his life from age 22 to age 35 or so, willing the stage into a time machine, his set list ensconced in the earliest beginnings of his professional career — the 1960s Beatles era and his 1970s chart dominating success.

When he includes a few of his more recent songs, McCartney himself admits to the audience that he knows they don’t really want to listen to that stuff, but he’s going to play them anyway. Not to fear though; he’ll get back to the oldies that they all came to hear as soon as his new songs are over. (2022 Got Back Tour and Oct. 2023 Melbourne).

It’s a career that demands nostalgia of him, that reminds him that his best and most inspired work is behind him. The granddad from Part 1 had a point. While McCartney enjoys playing live, all this visitation with the past that’s built into his concerts can’t help but keep alive memories of Linda — and John, and George, and whoever else.

Especially Linda, I think, because she never betrayed him like the music business could, like the critics or the press often did, and even like his Beatles mates could because of jealousies and rivalries. Paul and Linda were on the same page. She was his best friend and protector. I believe Paul had a happiness with her like no other.

There’s nothing wrong with nostalgia. Sometimes, though, it carries a built-in touch of melancholy. It reminds one of just how GOOD it was back in the day, when one was on the right side of youth, ascending toward one’s peak.

And McCartney in concert in the 70s was the PEAK.

McCartney in concert in the 70s was the PEAK. But that was the past. Now he adapts with a hearing aid and teleprompter. Also reflective of the inexorable march of time is the decline of his singing voice.

He’s done better than most and is a living legend, but he’s no longer at the apex. He doesn’t dominate the pop charts like he did in his post-Beatles 70s career. He’s not even mildly famous with the under-30 crowd, and many twenty-somethings don't know who he is (Forbes Sept. 2018). He may fill stadiums, but stadiums aren’t the world.

Now, this former symbol of 60s youth wears a hearing aid and needs a teleprompter to remember his song lyrics (understandable after having written hundreds of songs, but it’s still a reminder of the inexorable march — and toll — of time). And then there is the decline of his singing voice, which has been increasingly criticized by the general public, reviewers, and bloggers since 2012 or so. I wonder if in his quieter moments that criticism dispirits perfectionist McCartney. (Hearing aid, Teleprompter, Voice: Inarguable voice decline over past 15 yrs (from 2022), PM’s Voice Not Worth Price of Admission (losing voice since 2017), Afterword (2012-2016), SED (2020), McCartney III review, 2020 (voice is a problem))

Still, he refuses to sing his iconic tunes in a lower key. He is, after all, in the business of nostalgia, of entertaining the masses and giving them what they want to hear. And what they want to hear is his songs the way they remember them from the radio and from their albums and CDs, even if he has to strain himself trying. All in all, he can only give them an approximation at best.

____________________________________________

Why wouldn’t McCartney tour when the audience still comes, when it gives him that amazing human connection? His children are grown. What is there for him at home?

Notably, diehard fans take his strained voice in stride, and pay it the compliment of being pretty good for a man of his age. The audience members at his concerts sing along, dance in the aisles, cry with emotion (and a bit of bittersweet nostalgia), etc. Why wouldn’t McCartney tour when it gives him that amazing human connection? His children are grown. What is there for him at home?

When his grown children and/or grandchildren are able to attend one of his concerts, it must be a celebration for him. With Nancy in attendance (for every concert? most of them?), it’s the type of family affair he cherishes. It’s pretty close to those old family days with Linda.

Nancy is not a substitute for Linda, nor does McCartney treat her like one. Nancy is not a public figure. She is not involved in his music. As far as I know, she didn’t personally know any recording artists in her pre-Paul life. Also AFAIK, she didn’t have an artistic leaning that drew her to music so strongly that she forged a path for herself into the professional rock milieu. That was Linda.

Music was the other bond that Paul and Linda shared. The two most meaningful commitments of his life — raising children and making music — were done in partnership with Linda. No wonder he spends so much time with his children and grandchildren. No wonder he tours. Linda, love of his life, is there. He hasn’t been the same without her.

A Fan’s Tinge of Sadness: A blogger compares two McCartney concert experiences, 1976 and 2010. Paul amazes in 2010, but never recaptures the magic of 1976, as Linda’s absence is keenly felt

From the blog JimmyCsays July 27, 2010, written by James Carey Fitzpatrick, Kansas City writer and reporter.

The blogger compares two McCartney concert experiences:

May 29, 1976, Wings Over America tour, Kansas City, MO, Kemper Arena.

July 24, 2010, Up and Coming Tour, Kansas City, MO, Sprint Center.

The author begins by telling us this: “I have felt a vague sense of loss and unease the last few days, since going to the Paul McCartney concert Saturday night [July 24, 2010 Kansas City, MO].”

He then launches into his recounting of his first McCartney concert in May 1976.

“From the first song — I don’t remember what it was — I could tell it was going to be a memorable show. Paul was totally focused. He didn’t indulge in much chit-chat. Just song after killer song. His voice — and the accompanying music — was clear, strong and dazzling.

“Analyzing that [May 1976] concert in retrospect, I think that Linda McCartney played a large role in its magic. Even though she did mostly background vocals and percussion, she was the glue, and she was a picture of grace, femininity and professionalism. And everyone realized that she and Paul were a rock solid team, the foundation on which everything was built.

”Of course, it was a lot different on Saturday night [July 2010 concert]. Paul is 68, not 34. His star is not ascending; it is holding, at best. And Linda is dead and gone. The four other band members – great musicians, for sure — were all men. To me, Linda’s absence was conspicuous.

“Even before the concert started, I realized in my heart that it wouldn’t, couldn’t, measure up to the experience of 1976. Nevertheless, Paul was amazing. He still hits most of the notes, perhaps not with quite as much power, but he gets there… Instead of grabbing the crowd by the throat, Paul stroked and patted, for the most part. As you would expect from a retrospective, he did more talking between songs…”

There will never be a duplicate Linda, or John or George. Therein lies the bittersweet amid the celebration.

The audience may miss her; but for Paul, Linda’s presence is on the stage, bringing beautiful memories. There will never be a duplicate Linda, just as there will never be another John or George. We have the songs, but there will never be another Beatlemania or “Wingsmania.” McCartney can sing those songs, but never again in his youthful voice of 60 years ago. Therein lies the bittersweet amid the celebration.

©️ laurolive, laurolive.tumblr.com, www.tumblr.com/laurolive, www.tumblr.com/blog/laurolive, 2024

________________________________________

[your-absent-father]

Hihi get it? Because Eve is my name-

Okay, in all seriousness, hi to old friends. It's been a while. Almost half a year it seems. I took too much pressure on this thing which should have been like a hobby and not... like work. We aren't getting paid to do this so I want my free time to be escapist and fun and not another reason to fall into previous habits.

I am rambling. The tldr is that I am on my rebrand and self care era after a year of disappointment after disappointment so I want to do something fun and have fun.

Who am I?

I am... people on here call me Eve, but I have juggling around new pen names I could start using, mainly because my last one I have used ever since middle school. So, you can call me Eve, but don't wonder if you see other names popping up like Alina Ellis and E.V May that are now the top runners up.

I am queer, probably more neurodivergent than diagnosed but I am too broke to get tested. I live in Finland. I am 22 years old and right now I am trying to get my papers to be a full time teacher's aid, and maybe apply to study to be a elementary school teacher.

I love K-pop, especially stray kids and (g)-idle, classical literature, media about problematic women doing problematic stuff, Taylor Jenkins Reed's historical books, pretending to watch indie movies even tough I would rather just watch musicals on loop.

As a writer, I love to write some good angst. I have recently tried to write some more positive stories and just have fun but I can have fun while writing some pain. I really love complex female lead that has that delicious female rage in her. I also almost always have at least one lesbian couple or/and wholesome guy with a girlboss woman.

my WIPs

Drafting

All the great love stories

Six love stories all different in nature. An evil sorceress waiting for her turn in the steak falling in love with her guard. Cabaret performer seducing the police officer and getting more that she barganded for. Children of rival mob bosses falling in love. Two soulmates trying to find each other. Mad scientist trying to keep their lover alive. Girl with unbeliavable power who can't seem to die. All of the stories are different but they all have one faithful similarity: All of the stories end in a tragedy.

intropost

all writing in one

Tag: WIP: ATGLS

False Gods

the story of Beatrix Jones, the lead singer of the rising indie rock band Aurora Four. With fame and success on the rise, Beatrix and her bandmates navigate the music industry while keeping their identities hidden behind masks, a decision made after a scandal threatened their careers. Is the hid indentity worth the criminal activity they tangled themselves in.

Tag: WIP: FG

intropost

all the writing in one

The vanishing act

a mystery thriller about a mystical carnival whose employees seem all to be identical to missing people trough out the years, and haven't aged a day even if 100 years have gone by. After year of gaslighting, Amanda witnesses her best friend and her mother, looking almost same age, in the circus performing.

Tag: WIP: Circus Moirai

intopost

All the writing in one

Mika Connelly VS the power of love

Mika Connelly never thought something like this cpuld happen to her. After pissing off a fortune teller, who was secretly Cupid in disguise, Mika Connelly is forced to live in a teen romance novel so Cupid can prove that everyone falls in love at least someone. Problem is, Mika is aroace, so romance is final thing she could think about.

To escape her rose colored prison, Mika makes a deal with cupid. Cupid has 20 chances to make Mija fall in love. Mika's mission on the other hand, is to make her new love interest not in love with her anymore. If she fails, she is trapped eternally as a high school senior in a warpped version of her old high school.

Intropost

On the shelve rn:

Children of Jessamine

Fantasy story about a queen who has to make a choice between betraying her country to join her husbands enemy, or protecting her son while the time is ticking. People might soon find out, the crown prince isn't the kings child

intopost

Also I have couple on hiatus that some people might remember. I think I'll come back to them at some point.

What I am doing on tumblr?

I am not probably going to be that active on ask games and all of those but I do want to do stuff and be creative so I have couple of ideas that maybe could be fun.

I want to do trailers for my wips. I want to edit again and I don't vibe with any fandom where I could do the edits I want

fake scenes from the books as edits too

more organized stuff

I just want to be creative without putting pressure on myself.

Other tags:

Eve Rambling: My random ramblings

Eve venting: If I need to vent

Eve being creative: creative stuff other than writing

other people's x: Other people's writeblr

So... Sorry for the essay lmao. But feel free to messenge me. I'll follow back. Let's have some fun!

[colleybrifanfics]

Imagine a divergent universe, where Cassian Andor never met two bullies on Morlana 1.

He’s not the man he should be.

Jyn Erso, dedicated Rebel in the face of an impossible fight with a triumphant Empire, comes to Ferrix one morning to buy stolen parts. Cassian is very much… his old self.

NSFW below the cut. Smut with a distinctly wistful flavour.

Ferrix, Imperial Era 24

As the glow of dawn makes a rare appearance low on the horizon a flock of five steelpeckers flap over, low and squawking, heading from the main salyards to their daytime roosting sites in the surrounding hills. He tenses a little, instinctively, and hurries under the awning at Gueti’s. One of these birds had shat on him once, and clothes were basically unsalvageable after that. He isn’t ready to give up on this coat yet, not after all these years.

He doesn’t go off-world much these days as the risks are so high, but he does remember a few planets with … nicer birds. Birds that made pleasant noises to greet the day, a chorus of joy at a new beginning rather those guttural cries that put in mind a Corellian hound being throttled. He can't remember the morning songs of the birds of Kenari, though, and supposes he never really noticed.

He selects an outdoor table with a nearby heater, greets Gueti and orders caf and pistachio cake. Then, oh so casually, he places a little iron bowl on the table and pulls out the datapad from his large bag. The Time Grappler marks Start of Day but his, and Gueti’s, and his buyer’s (whoever they may be) has already started.

So. Something to read while he waits.

How many have died recently?

He rarely dwells on the news these days. It’s so hard to know what is the truth anymore. But illicit stations, broadcasting from ships flying under flags of convenience or from all-out pirate vessels, still pop up every few months before being shut down, and manage sometimes to broadcast text updates too. His datapad is ancient and he can’t afford the latest software update, but it doesn’t matter - these guys use old tech and the ‘dark’ holonet, whatever that is. He still likes old tech. He stares at the silently unfolding letters, telling the same familiar story. Another several-billion lives destroyed in a heartbeat. Apparently, a rebel cell had been located on this outer-rim world, a planet he had never even heard of - and that fact didn’t matter one bit because it didn’t exist anymore anyway.

Peace is, according to the official version, being kept. According to the unofficial version, Palpatine is simply wiping out any signs of resistance. He sighs. You think they would have learned their lesson by now, those rebels. How utterly pointless it was to fight back. It’s so much better to live. To eat, to sleep.

He is vaguely thankful, in a passing thought that commonly comes his way, that Ferrix has stayed relatively unscathed all this time. It’s a well-behaved community. Heads down, continuing as they always have to exploit those with money, whatever the design of their flag or logo.

His buyer is late. Still, he doesn’t mind. It means more time to enjoy the small pleasures of an early morning. He lights a cigarette - the iron bowl serving as an ashtray. It’s good cover for its presence, but he wants to smoke anyway. Since giving up the drink, told at last flat-out first by the doctor and then, more convincingly, by Brasso that it would be the death of him if he didn’t, he had felt.. hmm, rebellious … enough to take up another vice. Death-sticks had no appeal even for a risk-taker like him and the last thing he needed was more mental stimulation. Just something to make the days seem… a little more pleasant, in some indefinable way.

“Hello. Is this seat free?” The voice is from behind him and belongs to a human woman, with a clipped Core worlds accent, and obviously she is a small individual as he had not heard her approach over the sounds of the waking town.

He turns and takes her in fully. She is in Pre-Mor uniform, but of course that can mean very little and there’s something about the way she wears it just a bit… too well that makes him immediately positive that she isn’t Pre-Mor. No matter. As long as she has his money, he really doesn’t care.

She’s looking at him very directly, with pale grey-green eyes. She’s attractive. Definitely. He’s probably spending a beat too long looking at her as her eyes now dart quickly to the table - the little iron bowl there - and he realises she’s waiting for confirmation. He gives it with a little wave and she sits. Gueti is over in an instant and she orders caf but nothing to eat.

He sees her eyeing the cigarette. “Would you like one?” he asks.

She grimaces. “No, I hate the smell. Thank you, though.” She says this forcefully enough to compel him to hold the cigarette down and behind his stool so that the fumes don’t bother her. She’s intriguing him already. She doesn’t really look like a rebel. But he is immediately of the belief that that is what she is and wonders if she will realise that he suspects.

Negotiations begin. He’s so used to this now, it’s almost second nature. He's employing a favourite tactic today: try to bump up the price agreed remotely by introducing another unexpected piece as a bonus. The buyer would then sometimes think they were getting a bargain, without the time to research the actual value of said piece. But he knows not to push either the price or the deception too high. He likes repeat customers.

Repeat customers. She is talking now about how the masking transponder he has produced from the bag isn’t the exact model stated in their communications, and he’s telling her that it’s superior. He’s talking on autopilot, practically. A good part of his concentration is leaping ahead twenty minutes or so, to the time when he estimates that they will finish their business in a mutually agreeable way. He is thinking about how he might persuade her to delay her departure.

Because she is very attractive. And the problem with getting repeat customers on Ferrix these days is that … the women who live here all know him. Either directly or by reputation.

Off-worlders were a happier hunting ground these days. With them, he could very often rely on his old methods. Which basically consisted of throwing out the net and seeing if the object of his desire wanted to swim into it. He knew how good he looked, despite the signs of his past indulgences. He didn’t see it as vanity, just as a simple fact - evidenced by the way that the lamest of pickup lines would almost always result in… a pickup. Experimentally, he had even once tried the simple “I’m free if you are...?” - and had scored a pretty much instant success.

He realises soon enough that he should have put a little more thought into this, but then he wasn’t prepared for this particular buyer.

All he can manage, as they stand up, salvaged or stolen parts and credits exchanged, is “Would you like to stay a little longer and…”. He realises his error immediately, as her gaze goes from his face to his hand, where it had been making a vague waving gesture at the dusty street that seemed to suggest that the sentence might finish with ‘…let me show you the sights of Ferrix’, and then back to his face with a dawning expression of incredulous and derisive mirth.

Her laugh is loud enough to draw a glance from Gueti over at the counter.

“That’s actually hilarious. I was warned about you, y’know, by my contact before she gave me the rendezvous details. I thought you were going to be a real Loth-wolf. But this? Is this the best you’ve got?”

Stung but helpless and still hoping, despite these less than auspicious signs, all he can do is smile. Sometimes that would work. In fact, most things would work on off-world women. Again, he really wasn’t used to making much of an effort with them. He wasn’t very good at conversation. Perhaps he should just be frank.

“I just thought.. you might like a little fun. You know. If you want to, we can go…”

“Oh wow, you really don’t know when to stop, do you!” But her smile is now wide and genuine, and he still goes on hoping. He doesn’t mind being humiliated if a payoff may yet come his way.

At this most bizarre but strangely captivating impasse they continue to regard each other levelly. Finally, she tilts her head a little to one side and she subjects the full length of his body to a long, sweeping stare, as if assessing the visual condition of a speeder before deciding whether it is worth a test drive.

(Cont below - NSFW. )

“OK,” she says contemplatively, with a smile that reveals another glimpse of her prominent overbite. It’s… very cute. “Why not?”

He does have a very lovely smile, she thinks. And it had been clear that Caleen had feelings for him, despite the lighthearted warning. An intelligent being, especially a female, can often sense the painful truth behind the outward nonchalance. He was obviously an ex who she still cared about, despite everything.

But besides all that… she knows what she likes, and knows what she wants. Right now, what she wants is this slightly-built man with the unusual accent, the long jawline under a short beard and those big brown eyes that are somehow knowing, cynical and childlike all at once.

He is very, very attractive. And she has plenty of time today.

They attract a few knowing stares on the short walk to his place, but he doesn’t care, and he knows the starers don’t either. He’s gone home with a few Pre-Mor employees before. Some of whom turn a blind eye to his activities for that very reason.

They are upon each other even before the door slides completely shut, and her kisses taste so very good. She allows him to take her all at once and greedily, perhaps sensing that once this initial hunger is sated he will be more measured and considerate of her needs too. Maybe. He can’t think that far ahead. He can barely think at all. All his blood and energy seems to divert to his groin and he feels the familiar but still so delicious burning. He doesn’t even take his clothes off, bar the coat, concentrating on her tight-fitting uniform instead, featuring belt, buttons and zipped trousers that are not hastily shed. Panting, she tries to help him but her fingers get in the way of his, bringing a few snorts of laughter from them both. So she switches to unbelting and unzipping him instead, freeing the cause of that promising bulge that she had noticed from that first sweeping visual inspection. Finally, in frustration, he yanks her trousers and her panties to her mid thighs and she allows herself to be pushed back onto the bed. He follows and is delighted to find her so ready, absolutely sopping, her body belying that slightly demure expression on her face that he has adored for the last - hour?! - since he has met her.

He cradles her face with one hand as he pushes at her and she nips at his fingers with those cute teeth as he enters her fully, trying her out for size.

She breaks off from nibbling and fixes him with a frank gaze. “So,” she says conversationally, “what should I call you?”

He has almost forgotten that they didn’t know each other’s names. And here he is, buried deep and hard inside her. It does seem a little rude. For a second, distracted as he is by his lust he considers giving her his real name. But no, that wasn’t how this worked. “Keef,” he says after a little hesitation.

She smiles, as she knows that’s not his name, but he has answered the question truthfully enough. “Lyra,” she says immediately, before he even thinks to ask. He then vaguely wonders if, like himself, she has chosen the name of a real person of some significance to her life.

He finds himself frozen for a moment, despite the nagging from his nether regions to just get on with it already!. The past, always frighteningly close in moments of emotional vulnerability, lurks just outside his consciousness. Previously, he could drink it away.

“Come on then, Keef”, she growls with sarcastic relish, emphasising the F sound somewhat derisively. “Show me if the man lives up to the notoriety. Fffffuck me, Keefff...” and she blows the imperative and the false name into his lust-anguished face with those two long puffs of fricative breath.

Already thinking ahead to the next course, which might well involve that intriguing mouth of hers, he gets to work as instructed and she matches him, effortlessly.

***

They rest eventually, after over an hour of frenzied and gloriously messy sex. He wonders anew at the human female's ability to just… keep on climaxing, but decides again that he isn’t envious: if pleasure came that easily and frequently to someone like himself he doubts he’d ever do anything else remotely productive. It’s almost too much effort to light a cigarette, but it does really help to enhance the afterglow. She hadn’t seemed to mind the taste of him. It was a high quality tabac.

Very much to his surprise, she asks him for one. “I thought you didn’t,” he says.

“I don’t,” she replies. “Except after sex.”

“And how often is that?”

“I’m not telling you about my personal life.” But she smirks at him as he holds the lighter for her and she puffs the first little drag into his face coquettishly.

She is, quite frankly and once again, adorable. He wishes she could stay longer. Despite his reputation, he really dislikes one-night stands. Or one-day stands: whatever. There’s not enough time to get to know exactly what works for each other. Not enough time for getting to know each other. Just… not enough time.

Yes, there was definitely such a thing, with his relationships, as not enough time. But there was such a thing as too much time as well, of course. Bix knew all about that. Commitment. No matter how many times they tried it again, it seemed that he was never actually willing or able to give her what she really wanted. Perhaps that was sad. They had been so good together, when it worked. She was so good to him, even now. So good for him. Still, she had her life and that idiot of a husband and her cute children - and she seemed to be happy.

Switching his thoughts to the woman here now, as there's never any point in dwelling on the past, he calculates quickly - as he is still mostly as sharp and perceptive as he ever was - that “Lyra” doesn’t actually have sex that often. Or rather, that she doesn’t have regular sex with the same person. There’s something in her manner, her hunger, her eagerness to please him and to please herself that tells him that she is unattached. He feels even more certain now that she is a true-believer Rebel, despite her accent, and that her mere presence here was exceptionally dangerous, to him and possibly to the entirety of Ferrix, commercially valued though it was. No planet was ever, really, safe.

No. Rebels didn’t do long term relationships either, and in that respect he knew she was like him. Rebels put the cause first, always. They didn’t want to risk heartbreak. He snorts a little, cynically. So he does have something in common with them after all, albeit for a completely different reason.

An unpleasant thought threatens to cross his mind then but he quickly dismisses it, distracting himself with a long pull at his cigarette. They are sitting up in bed, the blanket covering them in a surprisingly modest-looking fashion. He thinks anew how nice it is to be sharing a bed when all they are doing are relishing what has been and looking forward to what is to come.

This in-between time… could possibly be his favourite part of a sexual encounter. Well, OK - but...top-three, anyway. Time to digest. Time to contemplate. Time to savour.

They could even be a married couple, he thinks, this silence between them is so comfortable.

She breaks it then, a child with a naughty joke. “Question: do you smoke after sex? Answer: I don’t know, I’ve never looked.” And she giggles.

As is often the case with jokes involving double meanings, as this is still ultimately a foreign language for him, he doesn’t get it.

Frustrated, but amused, she attempts to explain and finally ends up with - “You know - from the friction?!”

He gets it then, but as is always the way the joke is lost by this stage so instead of laughing he quizzically raises his eyebrows and suggests that after their next bout - they should look.

She finds that hysterical, apparently, and he finds her even more adorable.

***

They don’t, literally, smoke but he feels it’s a close run thing. By mutual agreement, they take turns to cool down any possibly overheating areas with their mouths, just in case. And both agree, after a great deal of intensive research, that this process is very counter-productive.

***

They break for a meal in the mid-afternoon. He can see she’s impressed by his store cupboard, packed high with dried ingredients and flavourings from across the galaxy, some of it rare and expensive. While he fries up some leftovers from the conserver, she explores the little house. There’s another bedroom, with a small single bed, in the front and he tells her it was his childhood bedroom.

As he had known she would, she soon spots Bee on his pad. “Your droid. He doesn’t seem to be charging.”

Even now, he can’t help but feel a stab of pain at that, but he keeps his voice light. “I know. He can’t be charged anymore. Eventually, he needed a completely new battery, and they just don’t make them anymore and I couldn't find a secondhand one. I keep him… just in case I do ever find the right model.”

“But his files will be corrupted by then. Have you transferred his memory? You could at least talk with him. Put him in another droid chassis, even.”

“I haven’t.” He concentrates on frying, stirring the vegetables and now adding the beaten fiejuc eggs. He has also just added Durmic spice so knows he can blame that for any dampness in his eyes that might come with his next words. “I made the choice not to. When my mother died, he was inconsolable. He couldn’t understand what death was. I could have had his memory wiped then, I suppose, but … he wouldn’t have been him anymore. His name was Bee. Is. I just … keep him there, in case…”

She has appeared at his side and he realises that while the Durmic might explain his wet eyes it doesn’t disguise the catch in his voice. He glances sideways at her, smiles slightly and sheepishly. He feels her arm around his waist then and her hug is one of comfort rather than desire, and it feels just as good somehow.

And he realises then that this is what he has really missed.

After this moment, and after the shared meal, things are different between them. Different in a good way. He realises later that they had moved forward with the liaison to the same stage that would normally take a week or so in his other casual relationships. There is a tenderness between them now. They talk. On light subjects, but they find common interests. It’s like a kind of cautious dance around the perimeters of each other.

And it’s all so good, and sweet, and delicious and somehow… medicinal. And hot.

It ends, as they had known it must. She needs to take the shuttle ferry out to the commercial port for her evening flight back to - wherever it was.

He wonders, as he watches her retreating form in the fading daylight, if he should call out after her, or tell her his real name. He decides not to. Perhaps she would decide to come again. If she lived that long. He feels a sudden and genuine chill that she will not.

He feels the pain anew then, and something of the old anger. The Empire. They had taken so much. Lives, chances, time.

He even wonders if he should join the Rebels, even at this stage. Belong, in some way, have a purpose, even if it is a short lived one.

Maybe one day. Then again, perhaps not. It is surely better to … live. To eat, to sleep. To do what you want.

He watches her until her retreating figure fades into the failing light.

Steelpeckers are nocturnal. Their dawn comes with the setting of the sun. Day shift; night shift. A flock of five fly over now, low, squawking raucously. Perhaps the same five from that morning - it is impossible to tell. The chimes for End of Day join their chorus as he stands there still, framed in the open doorway, looking, but with nothing to see.

From chapter 2.

[orreanintrepidness]

Someone called Ali a warlord literally ONE TIME to his face and he immediately attached the title to himself ever since. Thus, this gif was born. But I never did elaborate on it at all- Let me fix that Alistair's takeover, just under a year ago, isn't the first time Orre has had someone sweep in and take power over the region. No, since the region was settled 200 years prior, it has indeed shifted around a fair bit. During the early Orrean period (Equivalent to the modern old west era ((The 1800s)). ) Orre was ruled by someone holding the title of Sheriff. Funnily enough, the first Hagen would be the one to hold that title from it's inception, to it's end which came about following her death during the Orrean invasion of Unova somewhere in the middle of that century. Following this, Orre would be an anarchic mess for a good century or so. Bandit kingdoms popping up, etcetera etcetera. No rule of law whatsoever. This only changed when a band of Orrean mercenaries, led by Alistair's "Father" (Quotations because, well, Alistair is a clone, rather than actual son) Antonio Hagen, became sizable and powerful enough to assert itself as the dominant power, and therefore de-facto rulers of the region. Mind you, no titles were involved this time, and Orre essentially became a region split into smaller subregions each ruled over by members of Antonio's circle. This would lead to a swift modernization of Orre, which only ended once Orre once again collapsed after Antonio threw Orre into that one war that gets mentioned in the earlier games (You know, the one Lt. Surge talks about), and in turn threw it in on the losing side. Orre legitimately collapsed not long after other regions invaded it, and is the direct reason a lot of Orreans are typically hostile to "Outsiders" (A term Ali uses often, as people who've followed for a long time have seen). This collapse led to the former governance to turn into what would become Cipher, essentially Proto-Cipher, and in turn directly led to the creation of the Hagen trio (Alistair, Larissa and Lilli Hagen). Cipher would go on to in a way take over the region from the shadows, getting the mayor of Phenac, making Snagem a puppet organisation etcetera. Leading on to almost total technological stagnation, Orrean tech was, and still is in places, stuck in the 80's-90's. They're STILL using floppy disks. The most recent change, back to another form of warlordism, only occured after Alistair returned to Orre, gathered up what remained of Snagem as his "league staff" and essentially used that to repeat exactly what his father had done, the one difference being he is far less dictatorial, practically uninvolved with the daily lives of Orreans, and has managed to drag Orre out of the stone age with such speed that it's already on par with the likes of smaller major regions like Kanto, Johto and the like, and has only managed to partially crawl out of technological stagnation thanks to the Orreans literally stealing technology from literally everyone around them. The title of sheriff now being used for what would have been the subregional warlords of his father's day. Though these serve as ACTUAL sheriffs more than anything else, governance is left solely to Alistair for the most part. TLDR: Rye is a silly Welshman that spends way too long thinking about things far to intricate and convoluted about a region that hasn't been mentioned in any way shape or form by Nintendo in over 18 years, and it frequently spawns random meme images that I post without ANY context only for me to explain months down the line. Oh, and the Hagens somehow keep getting control of Orre, it's funny, all of them minus the First, Alisson, really have no place having that kind of control. The end.

[nevereatpearss]

For the ask game, 15, 22, 28, 37? :D

15. Favourite song? Hmmmm I really don’t think that I have a favourite song, some years ago when I was in my mainstream pop era it was Cheerleader by OML (I think that’s who it was by, you know the song I’m sure).

Another song I recently found that I enjoy is On and On by Lars Eriksson which is pretty chill, I enjoy the sort of old sound to it. But yeah don’t really have a favourite song.

22. Have you ever gotten in trouble with the law? Nope. I’m a good law abiding citizen.

28. What type of music do you like? All of it. All of it Soam. I love music. Lately (like the last week) we’ve been into rap, and 2000s music. Rock and roll is a favourite of mine definitely, but I do listen to just about all the music. With a preference for actual instruments as opposed to synth.

37. Favourite swear word? You know I don’t think I’ve ever actually sworn on tumblr, fuck and damn are probably my most used. Bollocks is fun to say, bloody hell is another common one for myself, bastard. As for favourite.. I feel like I’d want to do research to find a really niche old fashioned swear word. But I can’t be bothered right now so just have the ones I use.

Is damn even a swear word..?

Asks from this post https://www.tumblr.com/nevereatpearss/755495278382022656/get-to-know-me-uncomfortably-well

[satans-helper]

Reaching for Stardust - Part I

Read Looking for Space here.

Listen to the LFS playlist / RFS playlist (all fic playlists get updated even to this day!!)

Word Count: ~3300

Warnings: none

A/N: Y'all...I'm so happy to be here, immersed in this new series. I began writing this back in April after I, seemingly out of thin air, came up with a foundation that seemed solid enough to even attempt writing a sequel to my beloved LFS. Ever since I finished that fic, I thought that one day, I might return for more. I have a very hard time letting any series go and LFS was truly a momentous project in my life--the fact that so many people have read it and continue to read it brings me so much joy, I can't even tell you.

Having been a fan of GVF for about five years now, I do feel a lot of sentimentality and nostalgia surrounding the band, the music and definitely my own fics, too, particularly all my series. I can still remember exactly where I was and what I was doing when I was mapping out certain pieces of them in my mind. I felt a huge rush of nostalgia recently when I revisited my city's planetarium for a star show, which was a huge source of inspiration for LFS, and I realized that it was literally this same month, August, in 2019 that I was just finishing up the first 8 chapters of LFS, not even planning on making it a 30-something part series (LOL!). You'll see, if you read, that some of these feelings find their way into RFS. This isn't because it's a self-insert fic, rather that's inspired by how much this fandom has seen, experienced and grown over the years. I imagine my friends and readers who were back there in the pre-pandemic GVF era can relate to some level of nostalgia. A big theme in RFS is change. I think we all can absolutely relate to that, too. One thing remains the same though--this is a love story, through and through.

This probably seems like major overkill to introduce fan fiction but this is how I feel. Many of my old GVF friends have moved on in some way or another and I've often felt alone the past few years with still being so tethered to this group of beautiful, silly, fascinating boys that spark so much joy and fantasy for all of us. So, as always, thank you so, so much for reading my fics. I really hope you enjoy

P.S. I am cross-posting to wattpad (comments bring me life!)

---

I was getting lost in the pictures of Alaska–deep, shiny blue water, towering, white-capped mountains, a vivid stream of neon green in the Aurora Borealis, lush green forests. Even enormous, graceful whales surfacing, their tails nearly popping out of my screen as I unconsciously leaned in closer, hovering over my desk. I blinked hard as I turned my attention to the next picture that had been emailed over to me–a huge white ship, lined with windows that seemed endless–and huffed, shifting in my squeaky second-hand office chair. I didn’t even have a true desire to go on a cruise or even go to Alaska, but the neverending research into foreign lands nagged at me, reminded me that it felt like a very a long time since I’d been anywhere new. At least not anywhere exciting, really. 

I grabbed my phone and opened the gallery to scroll through the last trip Josh and I had been on. It’d been a long weekend about nine months prior, which reminded me that it wasn’t all that long ago at all but it still felt like ages since returning to the normalcy of day to day life. It had been a gorgeous summer excursion where we’d had a comfortable, clean hotel room, a warm pool and three nights out all to ourselves, and I found myself yearning for that freedom and escapism again. Plus the sunshine and heat. Michigan winters persisted, long and brutal, and we hadn’t broken through into any real spring weather until just the past week, which had at least given Sam a nice birthday. Josh and Jakes’ birthday was coming up fast. I thought it’d be nice to do something for them, with all of us–go somewhere for real again, all four of us, run amok in a hotel or airbnb. Or just have a nice dinner together followed by bar-hopping. Whatever the twins wanted, really. 

The picture I’d secretly snapped of Josh in our hotel room wandering out of the bathroom completely naked save for a towel twirled around his head came up after a dual selfie of us at the pool and I laughed loudly to myself, throwing my hand to my mouth. I’d nearly forgotten about so many of the little moments. It was so easy to forget when time kept slipping by like the wind, each good moment gone in the blink of an eye and each bad moment suspended in the air until something else came along, and the minutes turned to days and the days turned to weeks and months and before I even knew it, years had gone by and it felt like nothing and everything had changed all at once. 

Next I scrolled to a picture of the best breakfast I’d ever had, this amazing brie-stuffed French toast with a warm berry compote and housemade whipped cream, then the picture of Josh’s breakfast, which had been a skillet full of chorizo, bell peppers, eggs and queso that he’d deemed to be “orgasmic.” My stomach clenched in response and I looked at my phone clock, suddenly eager for dinner once again. My hours were almost up with 5 p.m. creeping on me and my mind turned its attention to Josh and I’s relatively new Friday night ritual–binging on Chinese and watching the most obscure, nonsensical horror movie we could find. With that, I swiveled around to stretch my legs in the sun through the window and pulled up the menu on my phone, trading pictures of Alaskan mountains for pictures of fried dumplings and greasy lo mein; a few seconds later, a very appropriate text popped up:

Hey mama, I’m gonna be a little late tonight. Want me to pick up dinner on the way home?

Yes please. What’s your ETA?

8ish? What’s on the menu tonight?

I’m gonna do the orange chicken and an egg roll. Wanna share some crab rangoon?

yes I do. What about dumplings?

obviously! 

;) see you soon 

I’d need something to hold myself over until Josh got home, though I was glad to have this part of our routine to look forward to. Stability was important and even Josh had come to understand that more and more. I turned my attention back to Alaska, mulling over the images and cycling through words in my head that I could bring to the page and entice people with, as if cruises needed more promotional materials and marketing to bring in profit. They were relatively cheap, all-inclusive and easy for people to handle and reminding myself of this made me bitter all over again–why couldn’t my company make one of their perks a free trip for employees once a year? I didn’t know their exact state of finances but I bet it could be done. They just didn’t want to. And the irony was that they didn’t pay most of their employees enough to take extravagant trips of their own.

Whatever. There were other, more important things I told myself, getting up to stretch and find something from the fridge or snack cupboard. In 32 more minutes I could clock out and put these wild places out of my head for a bit–the weather called for a long walk somewhere.

It was the nicest day we’d had so far, which I fully realized once I was driving and headed out to a familiar, easy forest trail Josh and I often did together on the weekends. But we had a busy weekend coming up, actually. We desperately needed to stock up on groceries–my most recent find of an old packet of peanuts as my last snack was testament to that–and then the boys had a show at Waterstreet. Sunday wouldn’t be as fun–my sister was repainting the entire interior of her new house and had somehow roped Josh and I into helping, in part because we were just that nice, according to Josh anyway, and also because she let each of us pick one color for one room each. Josh had chosen a shade of dusky desert red for the den and I’d chosen something called “spring morning,” a pale lilac, for the powder room, which seemed pretty fitting for the time of year she was making these renovations. 

The trail was bustling, which I wasn’t surprised by, and much of my walk was spent nodding and smiling to other people passing by. The break in weather was infectious for all of us in the area–everyone seemed to be in better moods finally, myself included even despite the gripes I had with work and money and everything else. Sometimes it felt like just yesterday that Josh and I were lying on our backs in the deep black night, gazing up at infinite stars and trying to come up with material for that poetry class that had been the catalyst to bring us together. The warm sun above me while I continued down the dirt path also reminded me of days past, of the first hike Josh and I ever had together when we both stripped down to our feelings, laughed, kissed through sweat, and had decided that was it. We’d made a lot of decisions over the years, so many that I felt like I hadn’t even noticed some of them, but I’d never decided to let fog cloud my memories. I hated that it happened regardless. And sometimes I absolutely hated what changes all the decisions had led to. I wanted to go back in time every once in a while to relive those moments and those days and it made my heart ache to know I couldn’t. Josh would assure me that the future would be just as good–and sometimes even better–than what those memories had to offer. 

And he was often right. Life was good, and I reminded myself of that as I narrowly avoided tripping over an obtuse rock sticking out of the dirt, it was just more challenging now. There was no school to fall back on–I hadn’t realized how much of a safety net that had really been at the time–and less free time. There were more financial worries. More pressures in life. But if nothing else, I had the best people in my life possible; if nothing else, Josh and I were rock solid. He didn’t let a week go by without reminding me that we were soulmates and I agreed wholeheartedly–no matter what might happen, we’d have each other. 

After my walk, I thought about running our necessary errands on my own but ultimately decided that’d be a deviation in routine I didn’t want to make. Josh was the best person to go grocery shopping with, being surprisingly focused and deliberate in his choices. He also was the best at picking out produce, somehow always able to discern which fruit was just the right amount of ripe, and he was good at finding the best deals. He was the coupon cutter, which always made me laugh, and I was the one who followed instinct more than the list we mutually made the day before. I would get caught up in being frivolous, more often than not tossing special treats into the cart that I couldn’t excuse beyond something like, “Come on, you like them too” to which Josh would agree with his cheeky little grin. 

And that same grin was on his face later that night when he came home with the bag bursting with Chinese takeout. His voice and the smell of soy sauce and that syrupy orange stuff made me hop up from the couch, excited for all the things, but mostly him.

Josh gave a little groan as he headed into the kitchen, his backpack still over his shoulders while he carried the white plastic bag in his right hand and his keys in his left. “Sorry I’m late,” he said, shuffling and rustling all the way out of my sight. “Stephanie needed extra time–she’s having trouble with the new cameras. And to be fair, they do have a steep learning curve. You remember how much trouble I had with them last week?” 

I followed him in, taking the bag out of his hand so he could zip back out and discard his keys and backpack. “Which one is Stephanie again? The one who’s obsessed with ‘film noir?’” 

Josh chuckled from beyond the walls before appearing again, pink-cheeked and smiling. “Yeah, that’s her. And that’s another thing–I’m gonna have to review how these cameras even film in black and white because for the life of me I can’t remember right now.” 

“Does she have any movie recs?” I asked as I opened a cupboard to get plates. “We gotta figure out what we’re watching tonight.”

“What about Night of the Reaper? You haven’t seen that one yet.”

“Yeah, but you've seen it,” I replied, wagging a pair of chopsticks at him. “That’s like, cheating. We gotta watch something we both haven’t seen.”

“We’ll find something.” Josh moved in close and pressed a quick kiss to my cheek and my heart fluttered–it always did. “What about you? What’d you get up today in my absence?”

“I went to the Hemlock Trail. It was busy,” I told him while we both plated our respective dishes, my stomach growling. “It was nice though. Looks like we’re gonna have good weather for your birthday.”

“That would be ideal but I’m going to be cautiously optimistic. Last year we had snow, remember?”

“Yeah, like a dusting,” I said with a little laugh, purposefully knocking my hip into his. “I’m gonna be blatantly optimistic and say it’ll be good. And we still gotta figure out what you wanna do.”

“We'll figure it out, my love.” Josh led the way to the living room and sank into the couch which we could have probably done with replacing; he set his can of sparkling water on the end table then grabbed the remote. “I’m so excited for these dumplings. I don’t care if it’s cat food.”

“They do kind of taste like cat food, don’t they?” I concurred, settling down on the other side of the couch. I put my plate on the coffee table in front of us and pulled it closer. 

“They smell like cat food, too,” Josh said, picking a dumpling up between his pair of chopsticks. “I don’t mind. They’re fucking delicious.” 

“I really don’t get how you’ve always known how to use chopsticks,” I remarked, opting for a fork instead to pierce my own dumpling while Josh fished through the cushions for the remote as he chewed. “It’s not fair.”

“I’ve tried to teach you, doll.”

“And I haven’t learned, so either you’re a shit teacher or I’m a shit student.”

Josh laughed and swatted my arm with the remote. “Hush! I’ll have you know that my students love me.”

I nodded, chewing. “So I’m a shitty student after all.”

“You are not. There’s a learning curve to chopsticks too, ya know.” Josh took another bite of his dumpling then leaned forward, peering at the TV. “Okay, so–what’re we watching?”

I followed his scrolling through our shared list of choices while I tackled the orange chicken. “What about that one?” I asked when he paused on the title Devil’s Ground. “It looks pretty obscure. 1983, a director I’ve never heard of, looks grainy and weird.”

“It’s been on our list forever,” Josh said, clicking the play button. “Let’s give it a shot.”

The movie really did turn out to be obscure–the protagonist was a teenage girl who finds an old well in the middle of the woods and climbs down into it, for some reason believing that her missing brother would be down there. Josh and I chided about the already well-known fairytale parallels, except in this movie the girl encountered creatures in the world beyond the well even weirder than those in Alice in Wonderland or Labyrinth, and ended up having to get betrothed to some menacing demon, played by a giant puppet, to save her brother. Then she and her brother kill the demon and find their way out of the strange world and back in their world.

Josh laughed loudly as the movie came to an end. “That was ridiculous. One of the best ones we’ve seen so far.”

“Those puppets were something else,” I commented, watching the credits roll and hoping everyone on that production went on to do better things. “The little blue one with teeth was my favorite.”

“Why didn’t they just get a real actor for the demon?” Josh asked, shaking his head. “Good god. It was a travesty but also kind of brilliant. I could show this to my students to demonstrate the use of close-up shots.”

“The close-up on the puppet demon when he was being slaughtered seemed unnecessary.”

Josh got up and stretched, gathering all of our plates and silverware and his chopsticks. “It really was. You want me to do the dishes?”

I turned the TV off and followed him, carrying in our empty drinks. “I thought another part of our Friday night tradition was saving the dishes for the next day and we can argue about it then.” 

“No argument. You get to do them since I got the food,” Josh said as he set the plates into the sink with a clatter, then pinched my side. “Deal?”

I giggled, shrinking away from his ticklish touch. “Deal.”

“Anyway, my darling,” Josh began to say, twirling away from me and to another kitchen cabinet. I watched, amused at how he always struggled to reach far enough up to get the wine glasses. “There’s a full moon tonight. Let’s go see it.”

“What? There is?” I asked, trying to peek at wherever it may have been through the kitchen window, our third-story apartment giving us a halfway decent view of the sky most of the time. That was one of the few perks of this place–we’d moved in last year, sizing up so I could have my “office” and enough space in general for both of us to not be completely on top of one another–though Josh never complained about that–but the building was old and lacking a number of things, namely outdoor space. Our little balcony was all we had anymore. 

Josh trailed out, wine glasses tinkling in one hand while he held the mostly full bottle of red wine in the other, and I followed again, feeling a sense of eagerness for the night sky which I hadn’t felt in, well, about a month. Our life together was full of tradition, I had come to realize in time, and a viewing party of the full moon whenever possible was certainly one of them. I’d just been too wrapped up in Alaskan cruises to remember this one on the calendar. 

The night air was chilly–a tingle ran down my spine and Josh noticed this as I sat down next to him on the cushioned bench we’d garbage-picked right after moving in. He skillfully and quickly poured each of us wine, set the bottle down and wrapped his free arm around my shoulders, pulling me in close. 

“It’s gorgeous,” he declared, his voice as rich as ever but a softness brushed through those words. I always loved whenever he got so starstruck over something that he couldn’t help but be concise. 

“It really is,” I agreed, pulling my gaze away from Josh’s equally–if not more so–gorgeous face to take in the huge globe of bright cool white above us. “I can’t believe I forgot about it. Sometimes I feel like I don’t even know what planet I’m on.”

Josh laughed, light and affectionate. “You’re on planet earth. It’s disappointing sometimes, I know, but if we weren’t here, I’m not sure we’d be able to see the moon and the stars like this.”

I took a drink, already lulled by Josh’s voice and his warm, strong arm around me. He’d always been strong, considerable muscle secure beneath silky tan skin, but he’d gotten stronger still; the muscles had become even more obvious and I sometimes poked fun, and a little bit of envy, at him for being a “hard-body” because, well, he was. I’d learned to memorize the curves and lines of his body throughout the changes, tracing every plain and valley with my fingers whenever I had the chance.“Probably not, no. We’re really lucky after all, aren’t we?” I said, reaching up to stroke his hand over my shoulder. 

“I think we are. Especially if we can see the stars wherever we go.”

“Speaking of–earlier I was thinking about how it’s been a while since we took a trip anywhere.”

“Yeah? Well, where would you want to go?” Josh asked, bringing his wine to his lips. “Not Alaska, I assume.”

“No, not Alaska. But I don’t know, Josh, I feel like we should go somewhere soon.”

Josh took another drink, looking ahead through the darkness that was interrupted by various porch lights from the other apartments rather than up at the jeweled sky. I’d expected enthusiasm–he’d have more free time soon with the semester coming to an end and I still had a lot of vacation days left, making the whole thing easy in theory–but he was uncharacteristically quiet. 

“What?” I prodded, tugging at his wrist. 

“No, nothing,” he assured me, coming alive again with his body squirming beside me, his hand grabbing mine in reciprocity. “I was just thinking about it. We should both think about it some more.”

I returned my attention back to the moon and the stars and a memory overcame me so viscerally it actually hurt–the abandoned barn, the vast field, the endless sky hanging overhead the two of us. “Alright, let’s think about it,” I concluded, wishing that the place we could travel to was back in time. 

Josh sighed and curled around me. “I feel like a dumpling,” he said, lifting a hand to pat his stomach, and I laughed right into the night along with him.

---

Tagging no one because my list is so outdated that none of those people are even in the fandom or use tumblr anymore LOL please let me know if you'd like to be tagged in this series!

[gaymer-hag-stan]

2023 SECOND GEN K-POP GG SONG ROUNDUP

The year is almost over, so I believe this is the perfect time for a song recap!

The girlies have been pretty busy this year as we have songs in Korean, English, Japanese and Mandarin Chinese!

•Hur Young Ji's "L.O.V.E.", from her digital single album, "Toi Toi Toi"

I still haven't figured out why DSP thinks that's how her family name is spelled in English, but Youngji's (third) solo debut was by far my favourite re-release of TAEYEON's "Weekend" this year! I love the colours, I love her hair, the looks and I even like her Bora-esque talk-rap segment after the first chorus!

•SUNMI's "STRANGER", from her digital single album of the same name

Sunmi has mastered the art of delivering gorgeous MVs and visuals, that's for sure, but I'd be lying if I didn't admit I was a bit disappointed. I like the instrumental she used for the chorus, and since it was the segment playing in the teasers as well, I thought she was gonna give us "Tim Burton movie OST realness", and she did... But then she went and mixed in a completely different instrumental for her verses and bridge and another one for the pre-chorus. Girl why 😭

•TAEYEON's "To. X", from her mini-album of the same name

Taeyeon is continuing her reign as the queen of second gen with her moody breakup songs and I wouldn't expect anything less from her. Not her strongest effort yet, but still fun to listen to.

•HYOLYN's digital single, "This Love" (feat. Random Guy No. 8)

Hyolyn is the queen of cunt, but it's still a nice change of pace when she releases cutesier / less sexy songs. The guy being a dog in the MV was a hilarious twist too!

•Sandara Park's "Festival", from her self-titled digital mini album

Dara finally released the mini she has been teasing for a while now and had her solo comeback after FOURTEEN years! I hope this isn't a one time thing and she actually releases more music. She may not be the strongest vocalist, but Dara was always an idol's idol like, she would do the 2NE1 choreos while looking gorgeous and serving face and smiles so solo projects like this re-release of TAEYEON's "Weekend" are the perfect chance to showcase more "stereotypical", if you will, K-pop visuals and concepts that we wouldn't really get out of 2NE1. And she even got Uhm Jung-hwa, one of her own idols, to cameo on the MV, sampled her song for this comeback, and got to guest at her concert! Way to go Dara!

•HYO's digital single, "Picture"

A solid release from our resident DJ, although I still think her early works and the unhinged "DESSERT" haven't been topped yet. At least it wasn't "Second", I HATED Second.

•SoYou's "ALOHA" (feat. Bora), from her mini-album, "Summer Recipe"

Soyou giving us "Queen of summer"! YES! This is definitely among my favourite releases this year. It's catchy, it's summery, it's dancey and she's SANGING as usual. The fact that she even got Bora to do the most unhinged 3 second rap of her career for this is iconic! A bit disappointed she's not in the video but I guess maybe appearing for just 3scs wasn't worth it... Still curious how Hyolyn convinced her to do just that for the upcoming SISTAR19 comeback. Maybe she promised her she'll sing as much as Dasom did for "Summer or Summer"?

Also, you know what I was thinking?

This is probably delusions of a senile homosexual, but having a SISTAR19 comeback in the middle of winter is weird. I know Hyolyn did previously release a summer-themed Christmas song but... What if this is a prelude for a SISTAR full group comeback..? Think about it!

•Park Bom's digital single, "I" (feat. A Victorian Era Ghost)

Yes Bommie! This was BEAUTIFUL 😍❤️! I love that she seems to have regained control of her voice in her recent releases? In the years after her comeback with Dara her singing sounded a little... Off? But since last year she seems to be back on track! She even actually got to appear in her own MV this time, I'm so happy!

•Jessica's "BEEP BEEP", from her mini-album of the same name

Okay, this is definitely my favourite song of hers so far like... Yeah, this was the third version of "Weekend" for the year but I don't even care, she nailed it. It's fun, it's cute and she SINGS her ass off. Yass cunt!

Now PLEASE release something more dancey and edgy, bitch..! I'm still not over that one performance of "How Deep Is Your Love" where she was serving c word all those years ago but then NEVER released anything remotely close to that like... what gives girl??

•SoYou's "Digital Single That Doesn't feature Bora"

Soyou had another release this year before her summer comeback that didn't get as much publicity. It's a much more mellow song and not cunty but she gets to showcase her voice and it's a nice song to listen to.

•Nicole's digital single, "Mysterious"

Okay, this I think might be my favourite song overall this year! Nicole picked up on the "YOU.F.O." and, of course, "MOVE AGAIN" momentum from last year and she definitely delivered! She is so mother in this it's insane. Gotta love that bass!

•Nicole's physical single, "Selfish"

And she continued with a Japanese comeback this time! It even charted decently in Japan, like top 20, I think? So girl SLAYED! Glad to see they still got it with Japan. Amazing.

•Amber Liu's digital single, "No More Sad Songs"

A good song from miss Amber. I think her Chinese fans must have liked it too because she also released a Mandarin version. Definitely her best out of the ones she released this year although, if I'm 100% honest, Amber's music is kind of middle of the road for me? It's not bad, it's not amazing, it's just okay. Good for her that she's still at it and doing her thing though.

•Raina's digital single, "The Way We Were"

Raina is back girlies! Glad to see she's still representing the After School girlies in the music scene as she's the only one still releasing music here and then. Luckily, this time she didn't have to resort to collabing with Trash E for this song!

•Amber Liu's digital single, "hatemyself"

Okay, this one is the darkest of her songs yet and, for real, I know everyone has been dragging Amber through filth ever since that stupid pro-cops comment she made, and she definitely deserved the backlash for that, but it did get pretty ridiculous after that like, I can't help but feel for her. She wasn't my favourite f(x) member, her solo music is not my favourite either but I do genuinely hope she is okay?

•NARSHA's digital single, "BLUSH"

Okay so, at first I was like "Is this bitch really making her first solo release in thirteen years a ballad?" But then she released "GAME" so the balance of nature was restored, but other than that this song genuinely did grow on me. It's a nice song and it really fits her voice and breathy singing style.

•Meng Jia's "KNOCKOUT", from her mini-album, "JIALAND"

So, Jia seemingly decided to release the most UNHINGED song of hers yet this year. The production is messy but in a "so messy it's good" type of way. The red hair was a serve and this was a very fun song. Except that weird change at the very end, what the fuck was that for? Someone deserves to get fired for that, she should change producers.

•NARSHA's digital single, "GAME"

I want to once again publicly apologize for ever doubting mother. This was a song for the ladies and the gays only and I know and love that she 100% knows it herself and owns this fact. BEG are among the cuntresses in the K-pop industry that actively and openly acknowledge their LGBT fanbase and regularly release songs about female empowerment and feminism in a non-performative and genuine way, so this was definitely a gift for us and I love her for that.

If you will indulge my delusions for a second time, I'd like to think that, like SISTAR, those OG hags are cooking up some new group music and Narsha's very unexpected comeback is a prelude to the group's.

•Nicole's "Gravity", from her single album of the same name

This is definitely not as strong as the other two releases this year but it doesn't matter because we shouldn't be greedy and it's still a fun song so it's all well. Bold move to release a summer song way out of season again too.

•Jea's digital single, "Congratulations to You"

This is a very sweet song honestly. JeA said she wrote this all the way back in 2010, I think, as a means to cheer up herself for all the things she had already accomplished and her future self if she was ever feeling like she wasn't doing enough. I think she also said she had been singing it live regularly whenever she was performing, she did have a solo concert either late last year or very early this year, if I'm not mistaken, and she decided it was time to release it properly.

My only minor complaint is that the "be happy day to you" part kind of takes me out of the sentimental moment 😅😭 I know nonsensical English is the bread and butter of K-pop, and I will forever be grateful for lyrics like "I'm so bad girl I'm so cool girl I'm so sexy sexy sexy girl" or "fire in the hole when you touch me down there I'm not feeling very well so hot in down there" or "kiss me baby I'll must be stay here day by day" but for such a personal and sentimental song she maybe should have had someone double check it, just this once 🤣

•Wang Fei-fei's digital single, "Distance"

Fei seemingly decided that she should give the others a chance and not serve cunt, not mother, but take it slower and chiller instead this year. A good effort, but I had come to expect a bit more from her if I'm being honest.

Below you can find the full Spotify playlist. Enjoy!

Some honourable mentions:

~Whatever that short snippet that HyunA released is supposed to be, it's amazing! She also did it for the gays and the girls and I genuinely hope she revamps it into a full song and releases it because it's currently not available to stream anywhere, other than the performance video on YouTube of course.

~Various project and cover songs: Taeyeon and Naul's "Nights Into Days", Bom's cover of a 90s song, "Holding On to the End of This Night", Hyolyn's cover of a Chinese TikTok song, "Fizzled", and JeA's "Rainy Day" for the Yaoki Project.

~Some b-sides from Taeyeon's mini worth checking out: "All For Nothing", "Fabulous" and "Nightmare"

~Jessica's collab with Amber, "Get It? Got It? Good"

~Hyolyn remembering to fulfill her cunty quota for the year and releasing a performance video for "BODY TALK", one of the b-sides from last year's mini.

~Although she said "No More Sad Songs", Amber went and immediately released three more. "hatemyself" was the better of the three, but she also did "Can't Go Yet" and "ILY".

~Jia's "GOOD GOOD LOVE" from her "JIALAND" EP and another song she silent-dropped a few days ago, "Starlight".

No T-ara reps at all this year as they were all real busy playing golf... I HATE THEM 🤬😭

[horrendous-bisexual-showdown]

Poll 5

Chandra Maharaj (She/Her) by @dreamypyon

Why Should Your OC Win?

She's so stupid and mean. she's just a huge mean pathetic jerk i love her. i think she's extremely horrendous because of how much of a jerk she can be.

What is Your OC Like?

Chandra is a gloomy debby downer who doesn't have many friends and claims to prefer it that way. Despite this she gets roped into the tragedy of everyone wants to be her friend anyways, because like how can anyone not want a bunch of friends to party with. the protagonist Valerie thinks she's just shy and could be won over with enough love and snuggles, but chandra is actually just mean. She likes horror films and trashy romance novels, and garbage josei manga and werewolves, her hobby is fixing computers and selling parts for extra cash

Mallory (He/Him) by @sparkledoodles

Why Should your OC Win?

Well. Here’s a visual. A pasty man with horns and a tail and in, for some reason, the most basic striped t-shirt plus …skinny black pants. He looks imposing, sure, with the demon eyes and the horns (and sometimes burnt arm, depending on the universe and time you meet him). He’s approaching you slowly, almost sauntering in a way.

He stops when he reaches a few inches away from you. He extends out his hand. “Ham?”

That’s it. He just wants some ham. Please feed him.

In short, he’s really a mess. A bisexual through and through, but horrendous by all accounts. He’s got many universes, usually head over heels for somebody canon or OC. If you like silly demon guys who speak the first thought in their head, take excessive naps, and feast on whatever is in the fridge, Mallory’s the guy for you.

What is Your OC Like?

Mallory. A dream demon with powers very reminiscent of Bill Cipher. His name supposedly meaning “unlucky” or “unfortunate”, he’s one guy who gets the taste of his own medicine.

I won’t bore with excessive details (you may have read his original info post from Round 1!), but he goes through a few stages. Class bully, angsty teen and then adult, worshipped/leader adult, and then house crasher. He develops an affinity for ham because of a simple question asking what he likes in his omelet. In one universe he develops a fear of blonde women with their hair in ponytails due to this nightmare (he takes dreams VERY seriously).

Most recently I’ve been messing around with his house crasher era. You may see a certain man named Castor Dent later, who is the owner of this house and ends up Mallory’s lover in this stage. I can’t speak about him in full since he’s not my OC, but Castor is great.

One universe he’s adopted a kid (and is a disorganized mess), in another he’s in his high school years figuring out his sexuality… then getting thrown into an arranged fight with a man so pretty he finds out his bisexuality right then and there.

Never let him behind the wheel, either. You will not make it to your destination by any means.

Anyways, that’s my ham-loving bisexual disaster for you.

Note!!!: If you’re wondering why sometimes he’s got his horns + tail, sometimes he has his burnt arm, sometimes he’s in a robe, and all that.. Well he’s got a few different stages/universes. His horns also come out, rising from his skull and his tail extends from his back. They pop out when he’s either feeling cocky/proud or he’s feeling strong emotions. His burnt arm forms from a deal he takes at a later stage in his life.