#there's so many 'this is what you are Steve' fics and it drives me mad because that's not how it works

[missingexaltation]

Alternative 'Steve coming to terms with being Bi' idea:

(The queer community isn't perfect, there's a lot of infighting that's not obvious on the surface level. A lot of bi/pan/ace people get sneered at by gay/lesbian people even now, and in the 80s it was worse.)

After Vecna, Eddie tells Steve he had and still has a crush on him, but as he's aware that Steve's straight, he's going to stop flirting with him because he doesn't want to make Steve uncomfortable. Eddie will get over it eventually, but he wants 'to be friends so please don't hate me, Stevie, I'm trying to stop'. For some reason that hurts Steve and he can't stop thinking about it. For a few weeks, while Eddie's being his usual boisterous self, Steve just watches and thinks.

Eventually, he tells Robin how he feels, that he thinks he likes Eddie and wants to try being with him because they get on great, and he's nice, and kind of good looking, and why not? He's not used to being subtle about asking people out, so figures he might as well see if Eddie wants to actually date him.

Robin is shocked but then SO happy that he's gay too. But when Steve says that he's not, that he still likes women, she gets annoyed. Being gay is a big deal to her, and she feels like Steve would rather date someone he's not attracted to, just so that he's not single/lonely. 'Maybe I just like Eddie, he has long hair, I dunno?' 'That's not a thing, Steve!'

Steve has no idea, and after his shift, when he's alone, he melts down about it and genuinely wonders if he's deluding himself. Maybe he is 'fully gay', maybe he's desperate for love from anyone. He thinks he likes Eddie, so was he lying to himself before? Did he love Nancy, or did he just want to love her? It doesn't quite fit, and it takes him a long time to get to grips with who he is, and he spirals a bit because he realises that actually he has no real sense of identity in general. He doesn't know what he wants in the future in ANY capacity.

During a movie night with the older teens, it's Argyle (bizarrely) that vaguely states that he finds both the make/female lead actors hot, and it's the catalyst for Steve actually figuring himself out. He doesn't talk to anyone at all about it. He thinks and thinks and thinks, and just comes to terms with it. He did love Nancy, he does find girls attractive, but he also wants to make out with Eddie. (He also thinks that guy in that labyrinth film is kinda hot.)

So he bites the bullet and does what he wanted to do originally. He asks Eddie out, and Eddie's immediately like 'uh HELL yes', feeling like he's won the jackpot. And after a few weeks of vaguely secretive dating (ie making out at Eddie's new house), Steve settles into 'liking both', and tells Robin. He's much more confident this time, now that he's tried and knows he likes both.

Turns out Robin's been thinking about it too, and when Steve tells her about him and Eddie, she's apologetic for trying to tell him who he is. She points out that she'd have hated it, if it was the other way around. She's been looking into it, and come to the same conclusion. Steve was right, he can 'like both'. They have another soft little moment before she brutally mocks him for his taste in men.

(Eddie, meanwhile, has no idea how much soul searching Steve and Robin have been through. He's walking on air, just ecstatic that The Steve Harrington is his boyfriend.)

[kamaluhkhan]

i'm not wanting anything (but your loving, your body, and a little bit of your brain)

pairing: shuri x fem!reader

summary: being an avenger doesn't leave you much time for college life (let alone a girlfriend), you and gwen stacy accidentally show up to a halloween party in a couple's costume, and shuri is determined to prove who you really belong to.

warnings: allusions to PTSD and death, mentions of alcohol and partying and smut - fingering (both shuri and reader receiving), oral (shuri receiving), thigh riding....

song inspo: "thats what i want" by lil nas x

a/n: hello!! this is my first time posting a fic on tumblr and im so nervous but very excited because shuri has been on my mind for the longest time. reader is an avenger in her senior year of college and best friends/roommates with peter parker. this is set before black panther: wakanda forever, and after endgame but some things are different (the blip was only a year, steve and tony both died in the final battle with thanos). anyways, please enjoy!!

before the blip, you had the whole work/life/superhero thing (mostly) down to a science. now, everyone was still processing the absolute mindfuck of half the universe being snapped away by a mad titan, only to be returned by a group of heroes one year later.

in the midst of it all, the girl you'd travelled across time and space for somehow ended up low on your priority list, but you found comfort in the fact that it was mutual. you were busy in new york, with college (senior year was kicking your ass) and avengers work (trying to keep the city safe with half the team gone and the others scattered across the universe was exhausting) and your internship at oscorp (basically unpaid labor, but you needed the credit to graduate). shuri spent most of her time catching up on what she missed, working on scientific and technological developments in wakanda whenever she wasn't travelling with her brother around the world for united nations or wakandan outreach reasons. there was only so much calling or texting that can be done before your relationship started to feel like an afterthought.

tonight was supposed to change all that.

harry osborn was throwing a 'halloween in january' party. shuri was in new york with t'challa, but she'd promise to keep this night free, and you promised the same. you were looking forward to being surrounded by a crowd of drunk 20-somethings, taking shots, dancing to music that was way too loud, feeling shuri next to you.

normally, you didn't dress up for the holiday - wearing a supersuit all the time kinda takes the novelty away from wearing a costume - but if halloween could be in january, you decided tonight would be the exception. you'd decided on a red lace bralette with a matching vinyl skirt, fishnet stockings, and a headband with devil horns. you didn't normally show this much skin. it was supposed to be a surprise for shuri, and the hope was that the outfit would drive her crazy. you had finished decorating your face with glitter and were about to swipe on some red liquid lipstick when the text signal rang from your phone.

shuri ♡

i won't be able to come to the party tonight - brother wants me to join him at an ambassador's dinner. i'm sorry. love you.

you knew that there had been one too many times when you had done the same to her - needing to attend to your avengers duties instead of spend time together, cancelling at the last minute on plans you were both looking forward to. you would see each other next time one of you happened to be in the same place, which started to feel less and less likely. that was just the way things were. you were fine with it. totally fine.

after you send shuri a quick no worries! i understand, you finish applying your makeup, taking one last look in the mirror, ready to party even if you didn't have your girlfriend by your side.

harry osborn was shirtless, wearing only a red and gold tie, jeans, and round glasses. you were pretty sure peter choked on spit when harry walked up to you, chest sparkling with a mixture of sweat and glitter under the disco lights.

"magic harry potter, right?" you guessed, glimpsing the lazily drawn lightning bolt on his forehead.

harry grinned and did a little spin to show off his costume. "hogwarts student by day, stripper by night," he said, voice strong over the pounding music. he gestured to your outfit, eyes lingering at the top of your bralette. "you look amazing. and you...." he looked peter up and down. "damn."

peter was wearing an earlier model of his spiderman suit. you'd told him it might not be the best costume to wear when he was still very much clinging to the whole secret identity thing. he didn't particularly care, though: apparently, he overheard a certain heir to the oscorp dynasty gush about how hot spiderman must be under the suit, and how much hotter it would be to be tied up by his webs. needless to say, by the way harry looks equally entranced by peter as peter is by him, your guess is that his eavesdropping paid off.

"come on parker, let's dance." harry didn't wait for an answer, only pushed through the crowd of people. he turned around and locked eyes with peter, a flirtatious grin on his face. you spotted a bar in the corner, and bartenders dressed up as various halloween creatures who walked around with trays of bright neon shot glasses. when a skeleton offered you some, you grabbed a few before they moved on to a trio dressed up as the powerpuff girls.

"i don't have to go if -"

"go," you interrupted, handing peter one of the drinks in your hand. "one of us should get laid tonight."

even though the flashing multicolored lights made it difficult to know for sure, you guessed that peter was blushing. you clinked glasses, downed the shots. peter kissed your cheek.

"love you!" he said before disappearing into the crowd to find his wizard with shining abs.

you smiled, and made your way to the bar. next to the bar was a table of halloween themed snacks - candy, sugar cookies in the shape of ghosts, orange cupcakes and more - so you popped a few pieces of candy corn into your mouth before ordering a drink. you took another jello shot while you waited, this one sweeter than the last and neon green. looking around the room, you were impress by how decorated it was: orange string lights, pumpkins, ghosts and bats floating from the ceiling. you wouldn't have guessed that harry osborn would be into this kind of thing, assuming that he was a trust fund kid used to parties at yacht clubs, but as "monster mash" played through the speakers, you had to admit you were pleasantly surprised.

you scanned the room to see if there was anyone you recognized. you spotted a mermaid making out with a pink power ranger; a group of fairies doing body shots; someone wearing a zombie captain america costume (steve rogers version) and another in a zombie iron man suit, both of which felt more than a little insensitive. it hadn't even been a year since they were gone, and you didn't need the reminder. you glared at the zombies from across the room, and the captain america actually noticed you, offering some sort of awkward salute, like you were a war hero. somehow, that made everything worse and the room suddenly felt suffocating and you just needed some air -

that was how you found yourself on the balcony, overlooking the manhattan skyline. there were heaters outside, thank the gods, so it wasn't too cold. you could still hear the chaos of the party from behind the glass doors, but other than that you were alone - or so you thought.

"you look hot."

you turn around to see gwen stacy in all her glory, wearing an almost perfect replica of claire danes' angel costume from romeo + juliet. the two of you were co-workers more than friends, both working at oscorp along with peter and harry, but it was comforting to see a familiar face.

"and you look amazing," you complimented.

"here, you looked like you might need this." she handed you a sugar cookie decorated with orange frosting and black sprinkles, which you gratefully accepted.

you split it in half, handing one back to gwen before devouring your own. you washed it down with the neon orange drink you'd ordered earlier, before offering a sip to gwen.

"god, is that --"

"vodka and orange crush," you explained. "apparently harry osborn likes to color coordinate his parties like he does his lab notes. at least this makes sense."

gwen laughed, angelic and carefree. "you wanna go back inside? i've always wanted to dance with the devil, and i was hoping this would be my lucky night."

you'd been around long enough to know that gwen was flirting with you and even if you were totally, completely committed and in love with a certain wakandan, you were feeling a little tipsy (probably more from sugar than alcohol, it was hard to tell), and it felt nice to be complimented, to be noticed, to be touched. so, you let gwen lead you to the dance floor, your bodies close together. you let her flirt with you, and maybe flirted a bit with her back. you let people compliment your accidental couples' costume. you weren't sure how long passed, after a while you heard your name being called over the sound of "somebody's watching me" by rockwell. ironic, you knew.

instantly, you recognized the familiar accent and lilt of her voice. you turned around to see shuri, wearing a black satin suit lined with dark burgundy, the shirt underneath long gone, revealing only a black lace bra and a gold body chain and gods she looked so fucking hot right now, it felt like your entire body was on vibrate.

"shuri!" you exclaimed, voice an octave higher than usual, a little thrown off by her sudden appearance. "um, this is gwen."

"hey! it's nice to meet you. i like your vampire costume --"

"i'm not a vampire," shuri interrupted gwen before dragging you to the bar. she leaned against the counter and ordered a whiskey, draining it in one sip before practically slamming the glass back down. "what in bast's name was that?"

"we were dancing," you explained.

"it looked like the two of you were about to rip each other's clothes off," shuri snapped. "i didn't realize that was how you danced in america."

you bristled. shuri was the one who ditched you tonight, and now she was mad at you? "it's a party. we were just having fun. you're overreacting!"

"i showed up to surprise you, but maybe you'd rather go to bed with that angel over there."

"that's bullshit."

"no, what's bullshit is me walking in on my girlfriend grinding on someone else while wearing this outfit." her eyes grazed your body dangerously, and from the clench in her jaw you could tell she had to restrain herself. "so don't pretend you need me here. it seems like there are other girls you'd like to fuck instead."

shuri ordered another drink, but before it arrived, you dragged her to the nearest bathroom. one of the zombie avengers from before - iron man - was about to enter, but you beat them to it, effectively closing and locking to door behind you. you ignored the subsequent banging on the door. harry's apartment was huge; you were sure there was at least one more bathroom, and you couldn't bring yourself to care about whether that asshole got a uti or not.

while shuri remained standing, pacing back and forth on the marble floor, you leaned against the counter, watching her.

"what the fuck was that?" you asked, arms crossed over your chest. "you walk in here accusing me of what - wanting to cheat on you? do you know how ridiculous that sounds?"

"you have to admit, it couldn't have looked good from where i was standing. you grinding on some blonde girl, wearing a couple's costume. don't think i didn't notice that, too."

your cheeks felt warm, knowing that shuri might have a point. "in my defense, the costumes were a coincidence and the grinding.... maybe that was less of a coincidence," you admit. you walk over to shuri, placing your hands on her cheeks to get her to finally look you in the eye. she gently pushed you away, looking down instead, but stayed in front of you. "look, i get that it probably looked like --"

"like you wanted to have gwen's babies."

you took shuri's humor as a good sign, continuing with a soft smile on your face. "please know that i'm 110% committed to you. i would never want to do anything to make you think otherwise. but...i'm not going to apologize for dancing, and having fun, because shit's been....fuck, shuri, it's been hard."

"you don't think it's been hard for me, too?" she scoffed, finally meeting your gaze. "i was gone for an entire year, and the world just moved on, and - and maybe it doesn't need me anymore. maybe you don't -- " she let the words get caught in your throat, and she broke away from your gaze once more.

oh.

what you thought was a burst of jealousy was actually...something else.

"hey." you take her chin between your thumb and your index finger, turning her head to look at you. "hey. i don't care how many dates either of us miss, how many oceans or time zones separate us, you are my person and i'm yours, okay? i will always need you." you moved to drape your arms around her neck, and she instinctively grabbed your hips, hands dangerously close to your ass. your bare torsos touched, the cool metal of her body chain brushing against you and sending shivers throughout your body.

you could tell that her eyes were slightly glazed over, and wondered if she was about to cry. your heart ached as you placed a gentle kiss on her forehead, as if to let her know: i'm here, and i'm not going anywhere anytime soon.

she didn't say anything, but instead closed the gap between your lips. it was such a rush kissing her, after all this time. her lips tasted like whiskey, mixed with sugar from the candy you'd been eating. when you pulled apart you felt dizzy.

"shuri." you whimpered. she lowered her head to the side of your jaw, placing a kiss just below your ear before whispering:

"tell me what you need from me."

"so much," you answered. "i need you on top of me, under me, inside me."

shuri's lips ghosted yours, the hint of a smirk.

"come on, sithandwa," she taunted, letting her xhosa slip out. "you can do better than that. be specific."

"fuck," you groaned. you found yourself being pushed back against the counter, the marble cold against your bare skin. shuri didn't stop kissing you everywhere, her hands exploring your body. "i - i don't know. something, anything, everything. any time i try to get off i need to think of you, but it's never as good as the real thing. and now that you're here now...." your words trailed off into a sigh. right now, you couldn't make a reasonable argument, let alone a logical sentence, even if you tried. you just wanted to relish in the moment - to enjoy her.

you throw your head back when you feel her thumbs brush underneath the vinyl of your skirt, the slight pressure reminding you that she was here, with you, for you.

"fine, i'll decide," she said sternly. she gestured for you to sit on the counter, and you did just that. shuri adjusted her body between your thighs, spreading them wider. she shuddered seeing the red lace thong you wore, the lack of fabric covering you, and met your gaze once again, eyes darker than before. "you don't get to come if you don't stay quiet. so be quiet for me, yeah?"

you bit your lip and nodded. anything, everything. she smirked, pushed the fabric of your panties aside, and sunk two of her fingers into you, knowing you were ready for her. even after weeks, months, apart, shuri could always read your body, know what you needed, how you needed it. the answer was simple, really; like you said, it was always her, her, her.

she kissed you, harsh and messy, tongue and teeth, swallowing your moans as her fingers brought you closer and closer to your release. shuri pulled your bottom lip with her teeth before moving to suck on your collarbone, your jaw, your neck. she bit down on your skin, right at your pulse point.

"i thought - i thought you weren't a vampire," you attempted a joke, but that was a mistake. you'd let a low groan tumble from your lips. another when she let her tongue soothe over the sting from her bite.

"i don't appreciate the attitude," shuri replied, her voice steady, but the corners of her mouth, slightly upturned, threatening to turn into a smile, gave her away. she was loving this. "and, i told you to be quiet."

she removed her fingers from your cunt and promptly shoved them past your red lips. you groaned again when she kissed you roughly, the taste of you dancing across your tongues.

"we'll try one more time to see if you can follow instructions. make me come, and maybe you can finish after."

she swapped your positions and unbuttoned her pants, pulling them off along with her briefs, as you got on your knees before her.

there was a joke here about the devil worshiping an angel, but you were too focused on her. her smell, gods, her taste - it was too overwhelming, and all you wanted was more. you'd spent your whole life on your knees for shuri if you could: worshiping her body, worshiping her.

you draped one of her legs over your shoulder, giving your tongue better access. shuri tugged on your hair slightly and you moaned, sending vibrations up her body.

"bast, that's it," she groaned. you added a finger, while your tongue worked her clit. "fuck. i missed you."

you brought her to the edge, stayed with her as she came. she probably expected you to get back on your feet right away, but you stayed, adding another finger and sucking her clit. she moaned your name.

you pulled away slightly. "one more, pretty girl," you promised. "can you do that for me?" she nodded furiously, and you went back to work.

when she came once more, you kissed her ankle before releasing her leg. shuri pulled you up to your feet, sucked the taste of her off your tongue.

"i missed you, too." you pull away, breathless, heart racing. "do i get to come now?"

shuri hummed. her thumb wiped the smudged lipstick below your lip. she studied you, admired you, like you were a fucking work of art that belonged in the met, like you hadn't just fucked her through two consecutive orgasms in the bathroom at a rich kid's upper east side apartment while michael jackson's "thriller" played outside the door.

"take off your thong." you did as instructed. she pulled you towards her, and lodged a leg in between yours. your cunt brushed against the skin of her thigh, back and forth as shuri guided your hips. "i can't believe you got all dressed up like this. absolutely sinful. and these...."

her hands moved to your thighs, nails digging into the flesh and dragging across your fishnets, effectively ripping them.

"shuri!" you protested, though it sounds like a moan.

"i'll buy you more. now, are you gonna come for me?"

the sound of her voice, the feeling of her skin against your heat, the smell of the two of you intertwining, it was too much. your orgasm crashed into you, and you were grateful that shuri held you through it. you kissed her once more before removing yourself from her grasp, smoothing down your skirt and looking around for your underwear.

"where are my...."

you looked over as shuri tucked your red thong into the inner pocket of her jacket.

"i'm guessing you'll buy me replacements for those, too."

she flashed you a shit eating grin before putting on her own underwear. she then pulled up her pants, not wiping your release from her thigh. the thought of her walking around, leg sticky with you, made your pussy clench.

the sound of someone banging on the door brought you out of your post-orgasm haze.

"holy fuck! hurry up!" they shouted.

"given your costume, i would say that was an unholy fuck," shuri joked, adjusting your headband for you. you nudged her playfully, rolling your eyes.

"how about we stay for a few songs, steal some cupcakes and drinks, and then head back to my place for round two?" shuri nodded.

"perfect."

before you opened the door, you shot her one last devilish grin. "oh. and this time, i'm in charge."

the next morning, shuri woke up to an empty bed and the smell of burnt cinnamon.

you were sitting on the small window bench in the corner of your room, a tangle of purple yarn on your lap and crochet needle in your hand. even though there was frost on the window, you only wore a pair of boxers printed with the word 'sunday' and cartoon suns, and an empire state university sweatshirt.

"sithandwa? the bed would be warmer with you in it."

you turned to look at her, snuggled under your brightly colored duvet, eyes half open.

"this should help."

you walked over and wrapped a purple scarf around her neck, sitting cross-legged in front of her. shuri sat up, but kept the duvet wrapped around her. there was still glitter decorating your face from last night, and shuri reached out to brush some away.

"you made this for me?" you nodded.

"rhodey taught me how. said it would help with...." you trailed off, not wanting to go into the details of your insomnia. "anyways, t'challa mentioned at our last team meeting that you're going to vienna after this. we went there once to take down a hydra base and gods, it was freezing."

shuri kissed you, pulling you into her blanket cocoon so that you were inside as well, straddling her waist. you broke apart, and she put her hands under your shirt. you shuddered at the sudden contact, her skin cold. her thumbs rubbed circles under your breasts.

"it gets pretty cold in new york, too, doesn't it?"

"yeah, but i can just make another one," you explained, letting your finger trace the details of her face, her sharp jawline. shuri took your hands in hers.

"no, i mean....i can still wear the scarf you made me when i stay in new york."

you brightened like one of those cartoon suns. shuri staying in new york for more than a day, more than a night, hasn't happened in so long. you yearned to wake up next to her regularly, kiss over coffee and bagels, take the subway together, show her the tourist sights you yourself haven't been to since you were a kid - the statue of liberty, coney island, the works.

you stopped your daydreaming there, not wanting to get too ahead of yourself. life is busy. plans change. people leave, for a little bit or forever. it happens.

"like for another day?" you asked, clearing your throat to subdue the excitement in your stomach.

shuri shook her head. you knew it would be too good to be true.

"like for me to move to new york. to live with you."

wait, what.

"shuri. wakanda's your home just as much as new york is mine. i know this long distance thing has been tough on us, but i would never ask you to leave your home, your family."

shuri said your name softly and gently brought her palms to your cheeks.

"you're not asking. i'm offering. the dinner i had to attend last night was to convince the UN to greenlight our wakandan outreach centre in new york," she explained. "if it goes through, my brother suggested that i be the one to lead it. on site."

"and that's what you want?"

"what i want to be wherever you are. i want to be part of your routine. i want to meet your friends, skip work and spend hours in bed together. i want to be here for you - for parties and movie nights and graduation."

at that word, you put your hand up. "i'm going to stop you right there before you send me into an existential crisis."

shuri grinned. "but yes to the rest of it?"

"yes. yes, of course." you pushed her onto the bed so that you were both lying down, facing each other, your legs tangled together. "so...when is this happening?"

"probably in a month, maybe a month and a half. there are still hands to shake, contracts to sign."

"bureaucracy," you sighed. shuri giggled, and your heart fluttered at the thought that you would get to hear that sound on a regular basis in person, not just through cellphone frequencies.

"i am, however, staying for a few more days while my brother takes care of things in vienna. so you're not getting rid of me just yet."

"now that is great news." you kissed her once, then twice.

suddenly, there was a knock on your door.

shuri readjusted your position so that the length of the duvet covered both of your bodies. "come in pete!" you said once she was done.

the door opened and peter parker's face came into view, along with a plate of those ready to bake cinnamon rolls that must have been fresh out of the oven.

"there's extra if you want," he offered.

"that'd be great, thanks." you gratefully accepted the plate, swiping some icing from the edge and licking it off your finger. "what's the special occasion?"

peter cleared his throat. "no special occasion."

you glanced the hickey on his collarbone. "oh, so harry stayed over last night and you wanted to make a good impression on him. breakfast in bed, domestic husband, sort of thing."

"that's not --"

"that's exactly it!" a voice from the kitchen interrupted.

"good morning, harry!" you replied, smiling tauntingly at peter.

"harry, i don't think we've met!" shuri added. "peter has told me so much about you...."

peter groaned and flipped you both off before shutting the door.

"thanks for the cinnamon rolls!" you shouted.

there was a pause before the door opened slightly. a curt, "you're welcome," was offered before it was closed once again.

you got up to put on a record as shuri devoured a cinnamon roll.

"you know, i'm really happy you're staying for a bit because i actually need your help with some things." you ripped off a piece covered in frosting and stuffed it in your mouth.

shuri raised her eyebrow, waiting for you to explain.

"my electric toothbrush has been weird - i can't figure out, for the life of me, what is wrong with it - and i've asked peter to fix it one too many times at this point," you continued, ticking off checkboxes in your head. "i wanted to talk to you about some potential upgrades for my suit that i would love your opinion on. oh, and i'm pretty sure i also broke my vibrator." you grinned sheepishly. "i didn't even bother to ask peter about that one because we don't need to be that close."

shuri stiffled a laugh, muffled by a mouthful of cinnamon and cream cheese frosting. she swallowed. "how do you even break a vibrator?"

"i don't know!" you exclaimed. "that's where you come in."

"baby." shuri wrapped her arms around your torso. "if i'm staying around for a while, you won't need a vibrator."

[cicimunson]

Christmas

Author's Note: My comeback is fierce, this fic is long af compared to what I usually write. I couldn't come up with a name. don't judge. Also this is the first time I've kind of drifted back and forth between POVS but I'll try to make it obvious. Steve's POV is in italics.

Story Summary: You and Steve have disliked each other since high school, but after your car breaks down in front of his house on Christmas Eve, the two of you...well, read the story.

Characters: Steve Harrington x Female Reader, OC Vinny the mechanic, nameless family members of the reader.

Warnings: Steve is drinking a bit but NOT drunk, Steve and reader are mean af to each other, angst, bit of fluff, sexual situations included: rough sex, bareback, biting, mentions of blood, spanking, face slapping, choking, degradation, praise, fingering, orgasm denial, too many orgasms, I think that's all but please let me know if I missed anything!

Word Count 7.5k+

Conclusion is up

Steve should be used to being alone for the holidays.

Birthdays, Halloween, even Christmas Eve now. It's not like his parents didn't call and apologize for not being there. It's not like they didn't put overpriced gifts under the tree to make up for it before they left. It's not like Steve was hurt or even surprised when they took off for a tropical vacation five days before Christmas without him.

He tried to convince himself he didn't care as he sat on the couch across from the fireplace, sipping a beer. He told himself he chose to be alone tonight. Nancy had invited him over for Christmas dinner but the thought of seeing the Wheeler family in matching sweaters and all happy like a real family had no appeal to him. The thought of Nancy and Jonathan exchanging gifts and kisses really had no appeal to him.

He's nursing his second beer when there's a knock at the door. He almost thinks he imagined it, it's nearly ten p.m. Surely no carolers are out this late. The knocking comes again, louder this time, and he peels himself off the couch to answer.

He opens the door and frowns.

"Shit, shit, piece of shit!" You bang on your steering wheel in frustration. Your clunker of a car always gives out at the worst times. You're not dressed for the cold weather, having chosen to wear a tight, short red dress to your office Christmas party and your jacket wasn't big enough to keep you warm for the mile walk to your place. 

You get out of your car and kick the door shut, trudging through the snow to the first house you see. You go up to the door and knock, shivering as you rub your arms trying to keep warm. No one answers but you see lights inside and a car in the drive, so you knock again.

The door opens and you frown.

"Wrong house, Y/N?" Steve asks, crossing his arms across his chest. No way you showed up on his doorstep on Christmas Eve intentionally, especially not with the way you're dressed. He glances down at your exposed legs, your dress barely covering half your thighs. Surely you weren't this dumb, coming out in the cold in a dress so short and tight he could see your nipples poking through.

You explain through chattering teeth. "M-m-my car broke down in front of y-your house."

Steve sighs. "You need to call someone?"

You nod, shivering as the wind picks up.

He steps aside and motions for you to come in.

"T-thank you."

He nods curtly. "Phone's in the kitchen. To your left."

You go into the kitchen, a little surprised that all that's sitting out is a half-eaten box of pizza. You would have expected the Harringtons to have a whole feast for Christmas.

You call for a tow truck, but of course Vinny says he's gonna be a few hours. The holidays, you can't be mad.

You go back into the living room.

"Get squared away?" Steve asks, tossing another log on the fire.

"I got Vinny coming to tow my car and drop me off at home, said he'd try to be here by midnight."

"Long wait."

"It's Christmas, I expected it. Thanks for letting me use your phone." You head for the door.

"You're gonna wait two hours in the cold?" Steve asks in disbelief.

"I didn’t think-"

"Sit down, dummy, and warm up by the fire."

"I'm fine. I don't want to bother -"

"I said sit." He snaps. "I'm not gonna let you freeze to death, no matter how much we might dislike each other."

You sigh. He's right. As much as you want to get away from him, you'd turn into an ice block sitting outside in your car. Instead you sit in front of the fire, holding out your hands to the flames to warm yourself.

"Thank you." You say softly.

He flops back down on the couch and continues nursing his beer.

You both sit in awkward silence for a bit. Finally you ask: "Your parents already in bed?"

He snorts. "Not here. Went to Florida to beat the cold."

"So you're alone on Christmas Eve?"

He gives you a withering look.

"Sorry. Just making conversation."

"Yeah, we don't have to exchange pleasantries and shit." He shakes his head and sips his beer.

You frown at him and turn back to the fireplace.

"Sit back a little dummy, you'll catch that dress on fire."

I fucking hate him.

"Don't call me that."

"Then don't do dumb shit." He retorts. "I'm not tripping over myself to put you out when you start smoking."

"I wouldn't expect you to do shit for me, Harrington." You snap. "I'm surprised you even let me use your phone."

"You and me both."

"Sorry I'm not throwing myself at your feet with gratitude!"

"Can you shut up? You're killing what little buzz I had going." He snaps.

You both fall silent. You sigh. Your feud with Steve had been going on since freshman year when the two of you were assigned to work together for a science project that was twenty percent of your grade.

Steve hadn't met up with you a single time to work on it. You'd busted your ass on the project and refused to put his name on it with yours. Steve failed the class and had loathed you ever since.

Steve stares at the fire, pretending you aren't sitting in front of it. You two had been in an intense feud since freshman year when he'd overhead you complaining about being partnered with him. He knew he wasn't smart like you, but hearing you and your friends mock him for his low grades had actually hurt his feelings. He had avoided you, taking a failing grade on the assignment so that he didn't have to deal with you judging him and putting him down.

You sigh again, frustrated beyond belief as to how your night is turning out. The office party had been lame, your coworkers sloppy drunk and loud. You didn't want to spend Christmas Eve alone but halfway through the party you'd made up an excuse and left.

"Why are you dressed like that anyways? It's freezing outside. You didn't think to at least wear tights?" He suddenly scolds you.

He's more annoyed with himself than with you if he's being honest. Your body looked amazing in your dress and the twitch he'd felt in his pants when he had opened the front door and saw you standing there had him feeling frustrated.

"I forgot to wear tights. We can't all be as smart as you, Steve." Your voice is dripping with sarcasm and Steve scowls. There you go, making quips about his intelligence.

"For someone that graduated high school with honors, you really are a dumbass." He retorts. "You'd risk freezing to death just to look hot?"

You blink up at him, surprised. "I look hot?"

Steve blushes slightly, realizing what he let slip. "As hot as someone like you could look, which isn't much."

Your face falls and Steve immediately feels guilty. You rise to your feet.

"I think I'll take my chances waiting in my car."

"Don't be stupid." He starts to protest, but you're heading for the door. "Y/N, come on, I didn't mean it."

You ignore him and slam the door behind you.

Steve contemplates going after you, dragging you back inside. Your scrap of a dress wasn't going to help you against the cold at all. 

Not my problem. He tells himself.

He sips his beer and sighs, the loneliness creeping back up to taunt him. He finds his thoughts turning back to you, you and that tight fucking dress. He palms himself without even realizing it. What the hell were you doing showing up at his house in the middle of the night dressed like that? And then you chose to be rude after he was gracious enough to let you come inside?

He stands up and grabs his coat, hellbent on giving you a piece of his mind.

You make your way back to your car, yanking on the door handle. It doesn't open. You fight the urge to scream when you realize you locked your keys inside.

Fantastic. Fucking fantastic.

You wrap your arms around yourself and try to stop shivering, cursing yourself for dressing so skimpy tonight.

I hope I freeze and they charge that asshole for contributing to my death. Smug pretty bastard.

You kick your wheel in frustration.

Who the hell does he think he is, talking to me like that? And he chose to be rude when I was trying to be gracious?

Your temper flares. You start to march back to his front door, hellbent on giving him a piece of your mind.

To your surprise, the door flings open and Steve comes charging out of his house. You both start speaking at the same time.

"Listen here you prick-"

"Alright dummy, listen up-"

You both stop and glare at each other, tension rising.

I want to hit him. I should smack him in the damn mouth. That fucking mouth of his.

You stare each other down, chests heaving, angry expressions, both waiting for the other to do something. To yell, to swing, anything. You tense up, expecting him to lash out at any second. Whatever he can dish out, you're ready for it.

What you aren't ready for, however, is Steve Harrington jerking you to him by your thin jacket and crashing his lips into yours.

You're stunned. He's kissing you roughly, teeth biting your bottom lip, tongue sweeping inside before you can react. You bring up your hands to his chest and push him away, hard.

Steve stumbles back a step, eyes widening. 

"Y/N, I-"

"What the fuck, Harrington?"

Has he lost his mind? Have I lost mine?

He looks just as shocked as you do, mouth hanging open, hand on his chest.

You realize you can't stop staring at his lips.

I want more. I want to taste him again.

You close off the space between you and fist his jacket, jerking him downward. 

"What the fuck, Harrington." You repeat, but there's no malice behind your words.

He stares down at you, his expression darkening. You reach a hand up and tangle it in the hair at the nape of his neck, tugging slightly.

He groans and reclaims your mouth. The kiss isn't as rough this time, but still hard and frantic, almost needy. He starts tugging you towards the house, almost slipping on a patch of ice, his lips never leaving yours.

He pulls you inside and slams the door, yanking your coat off your shoulders. He walks you backwards toward the fireplace as his tongue slips into your mouth and he snags a blanket off the back of the couch.

Steve breaks the kiss long enough to spread the blanket out in front of the fire, then yanks you flush against him.

You gasp as his hands reach under your dress. He grazes his fingers lightly over your clothed pussy, then slips his thumbs in your waistband and snatches your panties down, dropping to his knees.

His arm locks around your waist and he pulls you to the floor, laying you down on the blanket before pushing your dress up.

He unzips his pants and shoves them down to his knees with his underwear, then wraps his hands around your thighs and yanks you to him.

"Clean?" He asks, looking feral.

You nod, your words stuck in your throat.

"Safe?'

You nod again.

He holds out his hand in front of you.

"Spit."

You spit in his open palm.

Steve spits too, then coats his cock with your mixed saliva.

He lines up with you and pushes inside.

You cry out. You were a little wet from kissing and the spit helps, but it's not nearly enough to prepare you to accommodate his length.

He chuckles as you groan. "Too much for you, dummy? You can always tap out."

"Are you even in yet?" You retort and Steve lands a light slap on your cheek.

"You're moaning like a whore so you must be feeling something." He taunts, pushing in deeper.

"All I'm feeling is disgust that I'm letting you between my legs."

"Of course you are, you're such a pretty fucking whore, aren't you?" He reaches between the two of you and rubs your clit.

You moan again, wrapping your legs around his waist.

Steve leans down and kisses you roughly, then peppers bruising kisses down your jaw. He bites your neck and you yelp, shoving his face away.

"Don't leave marks on me."

"I'm do what the fuck I want." He growls, yanking your dress over your head. "No bra?"

You blush, crossing your arms over your chest, which makes no sense because he's already inside you but you do it anyway.

Steve laughs mockingly, tugging your arms away. He bites down on you tit so hard you yelp, grabbing his hair and yanking.

"Fucking prick!" You hiss.

He bites down again, his hand returning to your clit. 

"Steve, fuck!" You arch your hips as he bottoms out in you and starts fucking you hard.

"Take it. Take this dick." He groans.

"Not much to take-"

He shoves his fingers in his mouth and makes you gag.

"Shut the fuck up." He snarls. "Or I'll choke you with my cock next."

You bite his hand and it only seems to excite him, he moans and sticks his fingers further down your throat. You gag again and he chuckles.

"Dummy can't even suck fingers properly."

 You bite again, harder this time and he snatches his hand from your mouth to smack you.

"Bite me again and I swear I'll bite back till you bleed." He warns.

You squirm, his words having the opposite effect he intended. He notices and cocks an eyebrow.

"Thought you didn't like being bitten."

"I said no marks. Visible ones."

"Then fucking come here." He slips out and rocks backwards on his ass, then yanks you so that you're sitting in his lap straddling him, before shoving himself back inside you and biting your shoulder.

"Bleed for me." He groans into your skin. 

"Fuck, Steve." You whisper, squeezing him tighter with your thighs as you start to ride.

He bites and laps with his tongue at your shoulders, your tits, anywhere he knows you can cover up. You're gonna be a walking bruise tomorrow but the pain is so delicious you wouldn't dream of telling him to stop.

"I'm so close." You whisper.

"Already?" He teases. "Come on dummy, show me how you cum."

"Stop calling me names, you fucking prick!" You choke out, your body starting to tighten with anticipation of what's building up inside you.

"Whore. Slut. Bitch." He cups your chin and forces you to look at him. "Fucking dummy."

You cum hard, soaking his cock. You wail and bite down on his neck, your whole body spasming as you ride out your orgasm. It's so intense you almost fall off his lap, and Steve digs his fingers into your waist to hold you steady.

Steve makes a disapproving sound. "Didn't last long, did you? And look at the mess you made." He gestures to his cock. "So naughty."

You whine, overstimulated now that you've cum. He chuckles and rolls his hips, hitting that sweet spot inside you again.

"Steve, oh God."

"Knew you'd break first. Going soft on me now that I made you cum, slut?"

You slap him and he grins. "I wouldn't go soft for you if you begged me." You hiss.

"We'll see about that."

He picks up the pace, determined to make you cum again, to see you fall apart on his cock one more time. He'd never tell you, but you look so beautiful right now, skin flushed and glistening with sweat, lips swollen from his kisses, your eyes dark and pupils blown with lust. You were stunning, he realized. How he hadn't noticed it before tonight, he had no idea.

You moan as Steve locks his arms around your waist, lifting his hips and fucking himself up into you. He sucks his bottom lip between his teeth, the expression on his face practically feral as he looks up at you. He was gorgeous like this, you couldn't deny it. 

Your eyes stayed glued to his mouth, wanting to bite his bottom lip yourself. Wanting to kiss him until you were both breathless and whimpering.

Steve locks eyes with you. He smirks, but there's no malice behind it. He shifts and rolls you onto your back, driving his cock deep.

Your breath hitches. His hand loops under your armpits and grip your shoulders, his chest pressed against your tits as he thrusts harder, faster, groaning and grunting. At one point you think he moans your name but surely you misheard him.

Steve's trying to hold off, trying not to cum just yet even though you already got off, but the way you're looking at him, the way you clench around him, he's not going to be able to hold out much longer. You're perfect, so goddamn perfect, your tits, your lips, the way you're spreading your legs so eagerly for him.

"Baby…" He moans and your eyes widen. "Y/N, baby."

"So good." You whisper. "You feel so good, Steve."

He kisses you, still rough and demanding, but there's an urgency underneath. He needs to kiss you, needs to suck your tongue and catch your breathy sighs in his mouth.

"I'm close again." You groan, your body tightening once more, almost to the point of pain.

"Cum for me." He mumbles, his tone almost pleading. "Soak me again, Y/N, come on, come on, baby."

You cry out his name, that coil that was winding up so tightly inside you finally snapping and releasing. Steve groans as your nails sink into his back, hoping it leaves marks that sting for days, so when he jerks off thinking about this night he'll still be able to feel some of the pain.

"Steve! Fuck! Fuck!" You gasp, rocking your hips against him frantically.

"That's it baby, let me hear you."

You let out a garbled sound that's something between a scream and sob, your body slumping back on the blanket.

Steve stops pumping. "You okay?"

"Yeah, yeah, keep going. I'm good." You reach up and push his hair off his forehead.

"You sure?"

"Who's going soft now, Stevie?" You tease.

"You're the one laying there all fucked out on my dick." He retorts, suppressing a smile.

You clench around him and his breath catches.

"Don't think just because I need a minute to recuperate that I can't keep rocking your world, Harrington."

"Yeah?" He thrusts hard, making you whimper. Your pussy is so overstimulated that even pleasure hurts, but you aren't gonna give him the satisfaction of knowing he's made you so fucking achy and sore.

You clench again and he grunts, slapping your tit.

"Oh, you ass." You groan, your nipple stinging from the blow.

His hand snakes around your throat. "Didn't we agree, no more name-calling?"

"I didn't agree to anything. You're still a prick."

"And you're still a dumb slut."

"You talk too much."

His hand around your throat tightens. "So do you. But I know how to shut you up."

He keeps his grip around your neck as he resumes fucking you, long, deep, strokes that have you wet and throbbing all over again.

He pulls out and flips you on your stomach, barely giving you time to scramble to your hands and knees before he's slamming back inside you, his hand coming down hard on your ass.

"Take this dick." He groans. "Fuck, Y/N, take it."

You fuck yourself back on his cock, crying out as his slaps your ass again, the sting almost making you tear up.

"Damn it, that hurts." You groan.

"Shut up and take it." He hits you again and again, his strokes becoming more frantic and sloppy.

You grit your teeth and take his blows as long as you can, but one particular slap catches you so roughly your knees buckle.

"Steve, no more!" You whimper.

He stops, his hands coming up to grab your waist and pull you back further on him.

"I'm gonna cum." He grunts. "Gonna fill you up, slut."

"Oh fuck."

"Beg for it."

You aren't sure you heard him right. 

"What?"

"Beg for to cum in you."

"Oh, fuck off." You retort.

He jerks your hair so hard your hands come out from under you. You land face first on the blanket, turning your head to the side to breathe. You try to lift back up but Steve pushes on your back, keeping you pinned.

"Beg, dummy, if you even know how."

"Fuck you."

"I'll hold off, Y/N. I'll fuck you for hours until you're raw and begging me to stop, don't think I can't. Now, beg me."

You have no doubt he can do it. And as much as you love pissing him off and defying him, your sore pussy can't handle much more. You hold off a few more minutes, then finally give in.

"Cum in me." You whisper.

"Louder, don't think you're gonna get away with that. And I didn't hear please."

"Please cum in me."

"Again." He speeds up and you cry out, your body starting to tighten up once more.

"Steve! Please!"

He reaches under you and rubs your clit. 

"No, fuck, Steve, I can't!"

"You can and you will. Now, beg!"

"Cum in me, fuck, please, Steve, cum in me!"

"You first." He groans. "Again, Y/N."

"I can't, oh fuck, oh please." You babble, trying to push his hand away from your clit.

He keeps rubbing, ignoring your nails digging into his wrist.

"One more time, baby, you can do it. Cum pretty for me, yeah? Make me happy."

Oh fuck, not praise.

Of course he waited till the end to start praising you. Steve wasn't an idiot, he saw the way you lit up in school when you got an award, had a teacher call you out by name for doing a good job. Of course you had praise kink.

"Come on pretty girl, you've done so good for me. Cum for me, you've earned it. Let go."

You sob his name, your eyes rolling back in your head as your body convulses. You lose your balance on your knees but Steve holds you against him easily, grunting loudly as he pumps his load into you.

Rope after rope shoots off inside you and he wonders briefly if he'll ever stop cumming, because fuck, he hasn't exploded like this since he was a teenager.

After a minute or two he gently eases himself out of you and lays by your side. Normally when he's fucked a girl he'll hold her close and tell her how good she was, how sweet and perfect she is, but with you he isn't sure if he should. You probably wouldn't like it, right?

You can barely hold your eyes open. You'd been up all day as it was and now Steve has fucked you so good that all your muscles ached. You will yourself to get up and start hunting for your clothes, but you can't summon the strength to lift your head, much less anything else.

You hear Steve ask you something, hell, probably telling you to get out of his house, but you fall asleep before you can respond.

Steve asks again if you're okay, frowning when you don't answer. Are you seriously ignoring him right now, after what just happened? He sits up and looks at you.

Oh. You're asleep. He automatically grabs another blanket and covers your body, debating on what to do. Should he wake you so you can leave? Carry you his bedroom and let you sleep? Leave you here by the fire and go sleep in his room alone?

He's still weighing his options when there's a knock at the door. He glances at the clock. Little after midnight, must be the tow guy.

He tugs on his pants and answers the door.

"Y/N here?"

"She's asleep. I don't know if-"

"I told her I'd tow her car and give her a ride."

"Right, um, I don't know where her keys are or-"

"She locked them in her car. She does every time it breaks down."

Steve frowns. "Her car breaks down a lot?"

"At least once a month. I keep telling her she needs a new battery."

"Can't you replace it?"

He shrugs. "She says no. None of my business why, but I figure it's a little out of her price range."

Steve glances behind him to where you're sleeping. Even resting you look worried, the frown lines between your eyes furrowed and your jaw slightly clenched.

"Can you just fix it and bill me for it?"

"Sure, but tomorrow's Christmas and I-"

"I'll pay double. And throw in a big tip for your trouble."

Vinny hesitates, then nods. "Y'all swing by around noon tomorrow, I'll have it ready for her."

"Thank you."

"No problem, thank you. Have a good night."

Steve nods and shuts the door. He adds another log to the fire, tiptoeing so he doesn't wake you. After a minute of debate he slides under the blanket beside you.

He's asleep within minutes.

You open your eyes and stretch, sitting up to look around. You briefly panic when you don't recognize your surroundings, almost jumping out of your skin when you notice the sleeping form beside you.

Oh God. I fucked Steve Harrington last night.

You groan out loud and he stirs, propping up on his elbow.

"Hi."

"Uh, hi."

"How are you?"

"I'm fine, thanks. You?"

"Good."

The awkwardness between you can't be looked over, and to your surprise, a giggle escapes your mouth. Steve gives you an amused expression, letting out a chuckle himself.

You realize the sun is up. "Oh fuck, my car!"

"It's fine. The tow guy was smart enough to come to the door, he said we can pick your car up at noon."

"He's gonna fix it on Christmas? Must be feeling the holiday spirit."

"Would you like coffee? Or a shower?" Steve quickly changes the subject.

"Oh, um, yeah, a shower would be great, thanks."

You stand up, wrapping the blanket around you and scooping up your panties and dress from their discarded spots on the floor. Steve leads you to the bathroom, explains which one is hot water, and leaves you to it.

You're both relieved and disappointed that he didn't ask to join you. You wash quickly, wincing when your hands run over your chest and between your legs.

You wipe the mirror off when you step out of the tub, grimacing when you see yourself. The bites and hickeys on your shoulders and tits are red and purple, one small bite on your neck. Your ass is bruised too, you observe as you do a complete turn, and your hips and waist have fingerprint marks.

What a fucking night.

You dress and follow the smell of coffee to the kitchen. Steve pours you a cup and pushes it across the table to you as you sit down. The wince as your ass touches the seat doesn't go unnoticed by Steve, and he makes no effort to hide the smugness on his face.

"Sorry there's no cream or sugar. Haven't shopped in a bit. If you're hungry I might could fry an egg but-"

"I don't usually eat in the mornings. But thanks." You reply, sipping your coffee. You try not to gag at the strong bitter flavor.

"You slept a long time. We gotta pick up your car in just a bit."

"You don't mind giving me a ride?"

"You didn't mind giving me one." He quips without thinking.

You frown slightly.

"Sorry. That was crass."

"Yeah."

There's an awkward silence for a bit, you struggling to choke down Steve's coffee, him trying to come up with something to say. 

"Should, uh, should we talk about last night?" He finally asks.

"I don't think there's anything that needs to be said, do you?"

"I mean-"

"It was fun. We had fun."

"Yeah, sure." He agrees quickly.

More awkward silence. Steve leaves the room and comes back fully dressed, thank God. You'd been having a hard time not staring at his bare chest sprinkled with your bites marks and scratches.

"You ready to go?"

"Mhmm, sure."

You follow Steve to his car. He opens the passenger door and helps you inside, ever the gentleman.

He gets in the driver's seat.

"Vinny's shop is-"

"I know where it is."

He starts the car and you chuckle lightly as Christmas music starts playing softly through the speakers. Of course Steve Harrington likes Christmas music.

You sit in silence until you pull up in front of the shop. Steve puts the car in park.

"Um, so, thanks for the ride."

"You too." He replies with a cheeky grin.

You blush slightly. "Steve."

"Merry Christmas." He says simply, reaching across and opening your door.

"You too."

You get out of the car and hurry inside the shop. Vinny greets you warmly and hands you your keys.

"Glad you finally got this clunker fixed, Y/N. I mean don't get me wrong, good for business having repeat customers, but I worried about you being stuck out in the cold in the middle of nowhere. Not safe for a young girl."

"Did you say you fixed my car? As in-"

"Replaced that damn battery."

You fight the urge to panic. "Um, Vinny, I didn't tell you to do that. I can’t afford that!" You were barely scraping by to pay student loans and rent right now. You couldn't afford a new bill.

"Your boyfriend said he was taking care of it. Didn't he tell you?"

"My boyfriend? What are you…Steve??"

"Whoever's house you were at last night. I assumed boyfriend."

"He said he's gonna pay for my car repairs?"

"Sure did, offered double. Now normally I get payment up front, but that family is well off and his mother is well-respected so I know I'll get paid."

"I, uh-"

"Good on you girl, bagging a Harrington. They'll have you driving one of their fancy cars in no time, I'm sure."

You don't respond and Vinny pats your shoulder. "Merry Christmas, Y/N. Now, get outta my shop. I wanna go eat some turkey."

You leave, still absorbing what Vinny had said.

Steve offered to pay for my car repairs? Sure, he can afford it, but why would he do that?

You're lost in thought as you drive home, suddenly realizing you're passing by the Harrington house. You pull to the curb and park, marching up to the door and knocking.

Steve answers, shirtless again, hair still damp from a shower. He frowns when he sees you.

"Don't tell me that your car broke down again?"

"Why would it? It's got a brand-new battery, thanks to you."

"You don't sound happy about it."

"Why would you pay for my car repairs?"

"Well it's a shit car and the tow guy said it keeps dying on you. Why not?"

"You aren't serious."

"It's no big deal. I can afford it and now you won't be stranded anymore. You could have froze to death last night."

"Not the point!"

"Why are you being ungrateful? I did you a favor!"

You sigh. He's right. I sound like such a bitch.

"I'm sorry. It was very sweet. Just very unexpected. I'll pay you back. It may have to be on payments but-"

"Consider it a Christmas present or something. You don't have to pay me back."

"It's a lot of money, Steve."

"Honestly at this point hearing you actually say thank you would be more than enough to repay me."

You force a smile begrudgingly. "Thank you, Steve, truly."

"You're welcome."

You both stand there staring at each other awkwardly.

"Did you, uh, wanna come in?" Steve asks, hating the way his voice sounds almost hopeful.

"Hmm? Oh, no, thanks. I've gotta get home and start cooking. My family has a big dinner on Christmas."

"Oh, well, have a good time with your family." Steve replies.

You realize that he probably has no Christmas plans and mentally kick yourself for bringing up yours.

"See ya." Steve says with a little wave.

You turn to leave. Invite him to dinner, it's the least you can do.

"Do you wanna come?" You blurt.

Steve pauses, hand on the door. "Um, I don't know if that's a good idea. I mean last night was great and all but I think a repeat would be-"

"Wait, what?" You cut him off, bewildered. "What are you talking about?"

"You asked if I want to cum and I just-"

"Come to Christmas dinner, Steve! I mean do you want to come to dinner!" You blush scarlet and so does he.

"Shit, I'm sorry. I completely misread that." He apologizes, rubbing the back of his neck sheepishly.

"Yeah, I'd say so."

"Sorry, sorry." He repeats. "Uh, what were you saying about Christmas dinner?"

"I was asking if you wanna come- would you like to have Christmas dinner with me and my family?"

"Oh, uh, that's sweet of you, but-"

"Think of it as a thank you for my car. You should join us, really."

"You sure?"

"Yes. You know where my parents live, right?"

"Doesn't everybody know where everybody lives in this town?"

"Good point. We usually eat around five, if you decide to join us."

"Okay. Thanks." He starts to shut the door.

"Steve?"

"Yeah?"

You close off the space between you and peck his cheek. "I really hope you'll show."

Steve watches you hurry back to your car, his hand drifting up to touch his face. Your lips had been cold, so why was warmth spreading from his cheek through his body?

That evening you're surrounded by family and friends, helping serve food and chase the kids away from the desserts.

You're so busy you don't even hear the doorbell ring. Your uncle calls out in a booming voice from the living room.

"Y/N, a boy's here for you!"

You swat away a little hand trying to stick dirty fingers in a pie and hurry out of the kitchen.

Steve is standing by the door, holding a poinsettia plant and a bottle of wine. His red and green sweater is hideous and bright, making you giggle softly.

"Hi, Steve."

"Hi. You said five, right?"

"I did. Come on in."

You introduce him quickly to your hoard of a family who swarm and ask all kinds of questions. Steve is polite and charming, instantly dazzling your aunts with his smile and impressing your uncles with his knowledge of sports. You catch his gaze every so often and offer an apologetic smile, to which he shrugs his shoulders and smiles back.

Dinner is finally ready and everyone gathers around the table. Plates are passed, cups are filled and everyone chatters excitedly. 

Steve bumps your arm with his slightly and leans into your ear. "Your family seems really nice."

"Only in small doses. We're all ready to kill each other by New Year's."

Everyone eats and talks, dessert gets passed, and you manage to wrangle Steve from your family so you two can go for a walk.

As soon as you're outside, you apologize. "I should have warned you that they're so…much. Honestly, I didn't think you'd come."

"You saw my kitchen, you really think I was gonna pass up a free meal in favor of leftover pizza and cheap beer?"

"Good point."

To your surprise, and maybe his too judging from his expression, Steve slips an arm over your shoulders. "Cold." He explains, but honestly he's never felt warmer.

You nod. "Can't wait for the snow to melt away."

"Really? I love it."

"I had you pegged for a summer lover."

Oh for sure, can't beat the heat. But the snow is just something else. Beautiful."

You find yourself smiling up at him. "Yeah. It is."

"Wow, something we agree on." He quips. "I never would have thought."

"I'm sure we agree on a lot of things. Just neither of us would ever want to admit it."

"I know one thing we seemed to agree on."

You blush slightly. "Steve."

"I'm just saying, we were definitely in agreement last night."

"Were we? I seem to recall a lot of bickering and name calling." You tease.

"Foreplay, baby." He wiggles his eyebrows and you laugh.

"You're an idiot, Steve Harrington."

He grins. He’d heard those words several times from several people, but for some reason hearing them from you didn’t sting. He could hear the warmth behind them and it made him feel lighter than air.

You two make your way back to your house, the sun starting to go down and the wind picking up.

"You coming back inside?"

"Actually I'm gonna head home before it gets too dark. Tell your family I appreciated their hospitality, truly."

"They certainly liked you."

"Maybe too much. Pretty sure one of your aunts slipped me her number."

"Oh, I'm sure she did."

Steve hesitates, then closes off the space between the two of you and wraps his arms around you.

Maybe he meant it to be a quick friendly hug. Maybe it was a way of thanking you for inviting him to dinner so he wouldn't be alone.

But somewhere in between hugging and pulling apart, his mouth finds yours.

You gasp softly and he cups your cheek, stroking it with his thumb as he gently deepens the kiss, his other hand resting on your lower back.

You moan softly, parting your lips for him, and his tongue sweeps inside, brushing yours.

There's a whoop from the front door and the two of you jump apart, you turning to glare at your nosy cousins who'd stuck their heads outside.

Steve chuckles. "Guess that's my cue. Goodnight, Y/N."

"Goodnight, Steve."

He jogs to his car, hesitating before getting inside. "Hey, Y/N, you got plans after this?"

You shake your head. "No, why?"

"Just thinking, if you get cold tonight, you know where I'll be." He winks and gets in his car.

You watch him drive off before going back inside to your family.

They gush over Steve, how handsome he is, how charming he was. You nod and smile, your mind replaying his words over and over.

If you get cold tonight, you'll know where I'll be.

You make up an excuse and skip out of the family festivities early, driving straight to Steve's.

He's got the door open before you're even all the way up the walk.

"Get in here and lose the clothes." He orders.

"Don't tell me what to do." You retort.

He groans and reaches out, snagging you by the back of the neck. "Shut the fuck up."

"Make me."

"You goddamn brat." He growls, and his lips are on yours and he's slamming the door shut behind you.

Clothes are shed in mere seconds, and then he's got you bent over the couch, slamming into you.

"Couldn't stay away, huh? Such a greedy whore." He taunts.

"I could always leave." You retort, moaning as he drives deeper into you.

"I'll never let you go." He groans, landing a loud slap on your ass, and you know that he's just rambling, saying whatever he can to make himself feel in control, but your heart does a little flip-flop in your chest.

He reaches around and rubs your clit. "Come on whore, cum on my cock."

"Make me." You grunt, rolling your hips frantically. "Come on Steve, make me."

He slaps your ass again, his fingers working your clit furiously. "Cum for me baby, soak me cock, come on, wanna see it, Y/N, fuck, cum." He mumbles, biting down on your shoulder.

"I'm so close." You groan, your body tightening. You grip the arm of the couch, hoping you don't hit the floor when you cum.

"That's it baby, so fucking pretty when you cum, God, so sexy, cum for me." He rambles, lost in how good you feel clenching around him.

Your orgasm hits you so intensely that you choke back sobs. It's like white lightning and pure pleasure and also pain because God, pleasure like this has to be just a little bit painful, doesn’t it? Steve cries out your name, shooting rope after rope inside you, holding you tight against him.

You start to slump but he catches you easily, dropping to the couch and pulling you into his lap.

"I got you pretty girl." He murmurs, his lips touching your temple. "Wore you out, didn't I?"

"Don't sound so smug." You push at his chest playfully. Steve catches your hand and kisses your knuckles, then tucks it back against his chest.

"Ugh, don't be sweet."

He bites your ear. "Shut the fuck up, I'll be sweet if I want to."

"Ew. No." You tease, giggling.

He fists your hair and jerks your hair back, planting a noisy kiss on your lips.

"I'll throw up right here." You roll your eyes and make a gagging noise.

Steve slips a hand between your legs, fingers brushing your over sensitized clit, making you hiss and whimper.

"I could be mean. I could play with your pretty pussy until it's so sore you can't walk tomorrow."

"Please?" You whisper, parting your thighs further for him. You can feel his cock already stirring beneath you.

"Tell me you're my good girl."

"Oh, fuck you."

He pushes a finger inside you. "Tell me. Tell me and I'll pleasure you all night long."

"That's blackmail." You retort, trying not to moan and arch your hips.

"Mhmm. Be my good girl."

He sucks a nipple between his teeth, biting hard.

"Fuck…"

"We can. As soon as you say it." He adds another finger, his thumb pressing on your clit.

You feel yourself getting close again. "Steve, oh fuck yes."

He smirks and starts to pull his hand away.

"Prick." You grab his hand, trying to keep it between your legs.

"Come on, Y/N, admit it. You wanna be my good girl so bad."

"I'll choke first."

"On my cock, maybe." He starts fingering you again. "Say it."

You groan and rub against him, your hips jerking. Steve continues till you're right at the edge of your orgasm, then pulls away once more.

"Steve!"

He kisses you roughly, his fingers moving once more, curling against your g-spot.

Your body aches, the need to cum again so severe it's borderline painful.

"Please!" You whine.

"Tell me."

You bury your head in your shoulder. "I'm your good girl, please, please, I'm your good girl!"

He pulls you so you're straddling him and slips back into you.

"Steve!" You wail, your nails digging into his back.

"That's my good girl, say my name." He growls, his hips snapping upward, teeth against your throat. "Who's fucking you?"

"Steve, oh god."

"Whose good girl are you?"

"Yours, fuck, I'm gonna cum again, Steve, gonna cum!"

He grinds his palm against your clit, making you cry out. You wrap your hand around his wrist, bouncing faster on his cock.

"Cum baby, soak me, soaking my fucking lap." He urges. "Make a mess baby, God, making me such a fucking mess."

You scream. You try to stop but you literally fucking scream as you cum again. You feel a gush of wetness between your legs and can't even stop yelling to see what happened.

You realize Steve is yelling too, his hips flexed off the couch, driving deep inside you as he cums again.

You slump against his chest, whimpering softly. Steve strokes your hair, panting heavily.

A few minutes of silence pass. Your heart rate slows and you catch your breath. Steve is staring at the fireplace, looking lost in thought as he absent-mindedly runs his fingers up and down your back.

"Do you mind if I shower before I leave?"

He shakes his head. "Spend the night."

"I can't. I always meet my cousins for brunch the day after Christmas, family tradition."

He looks disappointed but masks it quickly.  "Oh, nice."

"I mean, I could stay, I'd just have to get up super early so I could run home and change-"

He cuts you off. "Nah, we've had enough fun for one night. Don't worry about it."

His words sting. Enough fun? Wow.

You get off his lap and collect your discarded clothes before disappearing into the bathroom. Once again, Steve doesn't join you. You shower quickly and redress, coming into the living room.

Steve's snoring on the couch, still naked. You toss a blanket over his lap and leave, ignoring the voice in your head that says to wake him up and kiss him goodbye.

Tag list: @neewtmas @harrystylesandthegoobs @cancankiki @cal-is-not-on-branding

[steddieunderdogfics]

This week’s writer spotlight feature is: @fandomlover1992! FandomLover1992 has 7 works in the Stranger Things fandom, and all of them are in the steddie tag.

@kaypie91 or anonymous nominator recommends the following works by @fandomlover1992:

Hello My Old Heart

Nothing Sweeter Than My Baby

A Rage That Never Wavers

Chained Up Fire

Finding Krampus

"I love her story lines so much! It never fails, once I get an email that one of her fics have updated I drop everything and RUN to ao3. Her fics really make you feel the feels." -- @kaypie91

Below the cut, @fandomlover1992 answered some questions about their writing process and some of their recommended work!

Why do you write Steddie?

Honestly, when I first started getting obsessed with Steddie, I wanted to read a very specific AU. I loved the plotline of season 4 but I was literally distraught by Eddie dying LOL! And I was like he doesn't have to be dead in an AU. He can live happily in an AU with Steve 😍😍😍

What’s your favorite trope to READ?

I love enemies to lovers. It is just such an amazing journey to see two characters go from one extreme to the other. To go from completely loathing someone to 'I'll kill for you.' The journey can be comedic but also humbling as the characters have to be able to say 'maybe I was wrong about you.'

What’s your favorite trope to WRITE?

I love, love, love soul-mate AUs. Particularly ones where they know it the moment they see each other. It just makes me feel so warm and fuzzy when someone goes, "Yes, this is the one. I don't need to look any further this idiot is mine and I'll love him and wrap him up in a blanket and feed him."

What’s your favorite Steddie fic?

Oh Goddess there are so many. Honestly the fic that I am constantly astounded by and just re-read all the time is Hic Sunt Dracones by Just-My-Latest-Hyperfixation. I am just so floored by the level of passion and imagery and masterful storytelling.

Is there a trope you’re excited to explore in a future work but haven’t yet?

I love reading a slow burn Enemies to Lovers but I feel I'm too impatient to write it. I'll be like chapter 1 going good, they hate each other and….boom chapter 2 they're in love and married. So, I really want to challenge myself to be patient and let the plot flow nice and slow.

What is your writing process like?

So, it's extremely chaotic but I love it. A lot of times I won’t necessarily have a story or plotline at first, but I will just have a scene in my mind. So I will write that scene and then reverse engineer the story to that scene and that's how I create the plot. For example in Nothing Sweeter Then My Baby, it was the scene where Eddie finds Steve at the bakery and he knows that Steve is his soulmate, but Steve is denying it and is so scared to be discovered. So, I had to be like ok why is Steve hiding? Why is he running? Why is Eddie so desperately looking?

Do you have any writing quirks?

Yes, when I start a story it is so chaotic. Cause I never ever start at the beginning. I will write like two scenes that are not in any shape related, then a single line will pop in my head and I'll write that but I won't finish it and I'll just start writing another one and next thing I know I have 5k of gibberish.

Do you prefer posting when you’ve finished writing or on a schedule?

When I finish…or when I'm like ok I need to post people are starting I'm dead lol!

Which fic are you most proud of?

Honestly, not to sound pretentious but all of them. There was a time when I looked at a blank page and felt nothing but hopelessness that I could ever fill it, much less be able to write 10,000 words in one sitting. As weird as it sounds writing Steddie has given me the hope, the skills, and the drive to become a published writer someday

How did you get the idea for Hello My Old Heart?

So, I was reading Bad Beat by LexiRoseWrites and I just kept getting this idea about Eddie being so mad at Steve at the end, he just picked up and left town. And poor Steve is pregnant and alone. Lexi gave me her blessing to write it and I tagged her work as inspiration at the bottom.

When writing Hello My Old Heart, what was something you didn’t expect?

I didn't expect the plot to take me where it did. I had planned it just to be a heartfelt, angsty story but through workshopping some ideas I came up with the Brenner/pills plotline.

What inspired Nothing Sweeter Than My Baby?

I always loved the idea of soul-mate identifying marks and how that would affect real life. So, I thought it would be really cool to combine the idea with royalty core and draw out the dangers one might experience being the soul-mate of a very important and powerful person.

What was your favorite part to write from Finding Krampus?

The parts where Eddie makes Steve blush. I love that little cat and mouse games where they are both attracted to each other but are scared to make a real move so they just flirt and blush and giggle. I find it so sweet and exhilarating.

How do/did you feel writing A Rage That Never Wavers?

When I started, I was going through a very difficult time. When I'm overwhelmed or just so fucking done with everything and the people around me, I just want to be alone and self isolate. I felt like no matter what I said, or did or even wanted, everyone was attacking me. So, I came up with a scene of Steve alone in a cabin in the woods and he was just scared of everyone including Eddie. And so I reversed engineered, what if there was a magical reason this was happening and therefore a magical cure. Don't we all want that when we have anxiety and the world is pressing your chest and getting air feels like a battle. I am doing much, much better now and I am very determined to finish the story before Halloween.

What was the most difficult part of writing Chained Up Fire?

Honestly, it was probably one of the easiest stories to write. It just flowed out of me. Full disclosure I'm having trouble picking it up because I feel like it's original enough to publish, so who knows?

Do you have a favorite scene and/or line from any of your fics?

For Nothing Sweeter Then My Baby: "Eddie’s heart was slow, proud, heavy and belonging to Steve. And by everything that was holy and unholy in this world, he would deliver it to Steve at his feet."

Do you have any upcoming projects or fics you’d like to share/promote?

Yes, when I get all my WIPs done, I am going to start on a vampire/ABO/royaltycore fic that I'm too excited about.

Outside of these questions, Is there anything YOU would like to add?

No, just that it seems silly but writing Steddie has legit changed my life and gave me hope again that I could be a professional writer. And I love the supportive community so much and I really, really hope that it stays strong even past the series finally.

Thank you to our author, @fandomlover1992, and our nominator, @kaypie91! See more of FandomLover1992's works featured on our page throughout the day!

Writer’s Spotlight is every Wednesday! Want to nominate an author? You can nominate them here!

[noxxytocin]

20 Questions for Fic Writers Tag ✍️

Thank you for the tag @myokk 🫰✨ This looks fun!

How many works do you have on AO3? 4 public and 1 anon!

What's your total AO3 word count? 18,969 words (public)

What fandoms do you write for? For now, I'm focused on Hogwarts Legacy. But I do have some pretty intense ships in other shows, like Stranger Things, so I might dip my quill into those at some point.

Top five fics by kudos? My most popular fic by kudos is Bury. It’s quite amusing because I knocked it out in one night after a few drinks and some seriously intense feelings. It’s my least polished piece, which just goes to show that AO3 readers are all about those spicy, quick reads and I love that, haha.

Do you respond to comments? Absolutely! Every comment notification makes my heart a bit brighter, so I reply to them with as much warmth as I put into my fics.

What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? I don't think any of my stories end on an angsty note—I'm more of a fluff enthusiast.

What is the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? Perhaps, Insomnium.

Do you get hate on fics? I don't believe I receive enough attention for that to be a concern. However, I do review all comments before they are posted for this very reason, so that I may block any unwanted individuals, if necessary.

Do you write smut? Yes, but in a very delicate, poetic manner. Smut, to me, possesses a certain elegance.

Craziest crossover? None.

Have you ever had a fic stolen? Not to my knowledge, though I do believe I have inspired some writings. I don’t particularly mind if I encounter similar works after mine has been published. Writing is meant to be an inspiring endeavor, and that is precisely the purpose of inspiration.

Have you ever had a fic translated? I have a close, French mutual who helps me double-check my French in my fanfics, and I know a decent amount.

Have you ever co-written a fic before? Well, my husband provides me with a great many ideas for the fics I’ve written, so I would certainly count his contributions. He is an excellent beta reader!

All time favorite ship? I couldn't possibly choose that...I have so many ships. I don't believe I have a favorite; they all occupy equal space in my mind.

What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? None, I am confident that I will finish all of mine in time. I've just been busy!

What are your writing strengths? Transforming risqué themes into romantic fluff is my specialty. I can take a rather smutty idea and turn it into tooth-rotting fluff. It’s more of a curse than a strength, really, haha...I also enjoy crafting dialogue and capturing the canonical personalities of characters. When writing Sebinis, I make a point of watching extensive videos of their lines to accurately capture their mannerisms and language.

Thoughts on dialogue in another language? It’s fine as long as it is executed properly. A minor mistake is forgivable, but it genuinely irritates me when I encounter French in other fics that is clearly incorrect, especially when the writer or beta says that French is their first language, yet this is not evident in their sentences. My French beta mutual has even remarked, “Yeah, no, they're lying” It drives me mad, as I am certain this beta is deceiving the poor author, and yet I cannot address it myself. It is not my place, and I am well aware that it would only result in the individual defensively justifying their lies. Hopefully they will find out eventually...

First fandom you wrote in? First ever?....hmm....I am honestly not sure...maybe (cringe) homestuck??? But that was in 2011 or 2012, hahaha...

Favorite fic you've written? One that I am currently doing for Sebinis...but I can't share because it's for an anon writing fest!

Surprise - no 20th question! 🫴✨ Tagging: @luminousecho @the-invisibility-bloke @shyinsunlight @steve-black-hl @moltenwrites @the-golden-comet @the-letterbox-archives @mirdeli @esolean @gaunts-angel @jamiemoonymark @crime-in-progress

[allyricas]

Make the Yuletide Gay

I would like to read a fic where Dustin is scheming to get Steve and Robin together during the christmas season. So he keeps trying to trap them with mistletoe but it just hysterically gets worse and worse.

First it's Nancy and Steve which is just super awkward for everyone involved. They share a quick peck that feels bittersweet. they loved each other once, but those feelings have transformed into a solid, lovely friendship.

Then it's Robin and Eddie and they cackle uncontrollably because they are both oh, so gay. Eddie peppers robin with sloppy kisses all over her face everywhere except her lips. Dustin is thinking maybe Eddie likes Robin, but then what about Steve? Steve obviously likes her too.

Unfortunately Joyce and Hopper are next, and of course, they start borderline making out. All of the younger teens are making gagging noises and Dustin momentarily considers giving up completely. He wants to see Steve happy though, so he carries on with his little plan.

When Jonathan and Argyle find themselves under the same mistletoe that same night, they just shrug and kiss. No fuss, no romance. They are basically platonic life partners at this point anyways. It helps that they are high as kites. The kiss makes them both giggle a little.

Things escalate when Nancy and Robin find themselves to be Dustin's next unwitting victims. He watches in rapt confusion as Robin is stammering and wildly blushing while Nancy sweetly kisses her. It's a soft, chaste kiss but zinging with emotion.

People are starting to catch on that someone is messing with everybody.

Dustin is getting very, very confused and frustrated. It seems like Robin and Steve are doubly sure to avoid the mistletoe at this point. He just escalates it further. As things go on, Lucas and Max keep "accidentally" finding themselves under the mistletoe. Dustin yells at them to just get back together and get out of the way.

El and Max, Eddie and Nancy (which once again, they are both giggling so much they can barely kiss. Eddie licks her) and a bright red Will and Mike round out the next round of awkward kisses. Mike kisses Will on the cheek and they are both tomato red.

Every single pair you can imagine get stuck but never Steve and Robin. It's driving Dustin mad.

The thing is Robin and Steve absolutely know what Dustin is doing and they think it is hilarious. It's Christmas Eve at Steve's house and everyone is having dinner and exchanging gifts when they decide to finally put Dustin out of his misery. Robin notes the mistletoe Dustin has hidden and allows her and Steve to get trapped.

Dustin has no chill as he watches with eyes wide, waiting for Steve and Robin to finally kiss. Only for Eddie to gently shove Robin out of the way and pull Steve into his arms. Then Eddie kisses Steve on the lips in a very, extremely romantic way. Like, something out of a goddamn movie.

Steve kisses him back. Oh god, they are kissing each other enthusiastically. Dustin is watching the two men he looks up to most passionately kiss each other.

oh oh oh

Dustin thinks back to Nancy and Robin. The connection between them. The many times that Steve and Robin have sworn they are platonic with a capital P. The laughs and smirks all four of them share with each other. The easy way Eddie touches Steve and gets in his personal space. The way Steve lets Eddie call him Stevie and touch his hair. He'd missed some major signs here.

"Why didn't you just tell me you're all super gay?! Could have saved me a whole lot of effort!" Dustin yells, exasperated but clearly thrilled for his friends. "You can stop shoving your tongues down each other's throats now, I get it ok. Talk about making the Yuletide gay."

[gosiksmallspace]

Shipper Tag Game

Thank you @godotismissingx for the tag! ❤️❤️❤️

Sorry that it took so much time 😅

Okay let's go!

1. What ship were you completely obsessed with when you were a teenager, but now you don't care anymore?

There were some k-pop ships I used to ship but as time went by I just stopped. Maybe because I’m not as much into k-pop as I used to be.

I also don’t ship any of Hetalia’s characters anymore.

2. Which ship would you consider your first one?

Stella and Brandon from Winx Club or Kevin and Gewn from Ben 10: Alien Force. That was even before I was aware of what shipping was.

While I was aware, I think it was Shizaya? Durarara was one of the first animes I watched. And Heiwajima Shizuo and Orihara Izaya's love-hate relationship was so good for a 12-year-old me.

Or it could be SasuNaru…

3. Your first fanfic belonged to which couple?

Written it was Merciless. 

But read? That was so long time ago...

I remember I found some Ben 10 stories on the Internet and I read a lot of them as a kid.

But when I read and I was aware I was reading fanfics it was most likely SasuNaru or Darry. It was most likely still on Wattpad or fanfiction.net. On or those self-publishing blogs. Those were popular back then.

4. Do you remember the first couple you saw a fanart over?

Probably SasuNaru. Or another ship that was popular at the beginning of the 2010s.

5. Did you ever get into ship discourse?

I try not to. I mostly believe that fiction is fiction and when I don't like something I just don't read it.

I like to read people's points of view though.

6. Did you used to have any no-otp or have it currently?

Not really. I used to hate UkFrance from Hetalia but now I just don't care. And I never really shipped Destiel. But I'm not sure I would call them a no-otp.

7. Who were the couple in the last fanfic you read?

A new chapter of Merciless fic that I'm always waiting for was published. It's called Hidsight by duty_free. AND IT'S AWESOME, GO READ IT. It's a wonderful continuation to The Merciless that can actually fix those two morons (I have hope, it's still ongoing)

Before it, my friend @frayed-at-the-seams published her fic about Junho and Hoyeol from D.P. It's called Dogs and Cats. It's an interesting supernatural spin on the original story and it allows Junho and Hoyeol to be cute ❤️

8. Currently, do you have any OTPs?

Of course. My absolute favorite obsession is Han Jaeho x Jo Hyunsoo from The Merciless

But there is more:

Roronora Zoro x Sanji (Zosan) from One Piece

Sakata Gintoki x Hijikata Toshirou (GinHiji) from Gintama

Shizuo Heiwajima x Orihara Izaya (Shizaya) from Durarara!!

Oga Tatsumi x Furuichi Takayuki (OgaFuru) from Beelzebub

Lee Dongsik x Han Juwon from Beyond Evil

Kang Yohan x Kim Gaon (GaHan) from Devil Judge

An Junho x Han Hoyeol from D.P.

Miyuki Kazuya x Sawamura Eijun (MiyuSawa) from Ace of Diamond 

James T. Kirk x Spock from Star Trek 

Merlin x Arthur Pendragon from BBC Merlin

James Bond x Q (00Q) from James Bond movies

Harry Hart x Gary "Eggsy" Unwin from Kingsman movies

Tony Stark aka Iron Man x Steve Rogers aka Captain America from Marvel Comics (comics only.)

Peter Parker aka Spiderman and Wade Wilson aka Deadpool from the Marvel Comics

Loid Forger x Yor Forger from SPY X FAMILY

Hino Eiji x Akhn (EiAn) from Kamen Rider OOO

Shijima Go x Chase from Kamen Rider Drive

Kiryu Sento x Banjo Ryuga from Kamen Rider Build

and many many more

Also as an exception to my k-pop rule, I still ship ChanBaek from EXO.

9. Is there any couple that, to this day, you are extremely mad about not getting together?

Robin and Barney from How I Met Your Mother. I get that it was planned from the beginning for Ted to end up with Robin but did they have to make Robin and Barney so good???

Also, Merthur, like they had a whole story about them? All 5 seasons?

And Sterek. 

10. Is there any ship you used to dislike but now you think they are kind of interesting?

Zeke x Levi from Shingeki no Kyojin. I used to not be much into it but there is an amazing reincarnation comic AU on twitter (here) with them and I have to say that they have a potential.

11. Do you have any ship that, in the past, was considered normal but now you would be canceled over?

Not sure... There were some ships that I wasn't aware of age. I don't mind ships with big age differences but I like for both parties to be over 18.

So maybe as an example Levi x Eren? Eren was 15 and now looking back I'm not sure if I would ship it. 

12. What was your favorite crack ship?

Tried to think of something but my head is empty. I don't believe I don't have any crack ships!

13. Who is the couple you read more fanfics of?

Shizaya, GinHiji or ChanBaek. They have big fandoms so I could just move from one fic to another. 

Also YoonMin. I used to ship them a lot but now not really but I read a lot of fics with them.

14. What most of your ships usually have in common?

They usually banter or tease each other. Those love-hate relationships are my favorites. And more of them lately have an age difference.

15. What you absolutely hate in a ship?

Lack of chemistry? I hate too much drama but also don't like where everything is fine. And cheating.

tagging (no preassure): @daxianme @yardmargs @frayed-at-the-seams @bobafvcks @babischlong-six @stanaclown @igonecrazy @chhagiya @lovemevermore @ilikeallthepenguins @manproposes-goddisposes @backtomanyang @inashoe @darktecno @areththeimagine and everyone who wants :)

[thrillingdetectivetales]

This is a total long shot, but I'm looking for a series of Harringrove fics that appears to have been taken off AO3. The series is at least two fics, but may be more (I can't fully recall) and I think both parts were fairly long. I don't remember the titles of the individual stories or the series or the author, because my brain is a sieve, but I put a quick rundown of what plot/details I remember under a read more below. If anybody either has a download of this fic, knows where I can get one, or remembers the author/titles so I can try my hand with the Wayback Machine, I would really appreciate it. (Spoilers ahead, obviously, and caveat that there's a chance I may be misremembering some of these from other Harringrove fic I've read):

Billy meets Eleven fairly early on, and I believe that at first he mishears her name as Ellen, but he eventually moves into calling her Elijane. Later on, toward the end of the first story/beginning of the second, he runs into Eleven (on her way to Chicago/to find her mom, maybe?) and offers to take her because he needs to get out of town to clear his head after a fight with Steve (detailed later). Their car gets run off the road and they get kidnapped by lab people.

Midwayish through the first story, I want to say, Hopper or someone intervenes on behalf of Billy with Neil and he winds up in his own apartment. He buys a couch or a whole set of furniture or something that's red.

Billy and Steve have their first kiss after they get into an altercation with Tommy and either some of his friends or maybe cousins, where they're walking down the street and Tommy throws a beer can at them. They throw it back and hit Tommy in the face or something and then go running. They end up in an alley together late at night hiding and that's where they have their first kiss.

Billy catches Steve wearing glasses he doesn't normally wear in public and Steve gets super self-conscious about it at first. He also has two german shepherds named Luke and Leia. When Billy first meets them, while Steve is out walking them near the garage where Billy works, he plays with them and asks "Are you a puppy?"

At one point, Lucas sees Steve and Billy together before they're out, and Billy goes full rage mode on him like an asshole. Steve gets big mad for obvious reasons and they sort of separate until Billy apologizes and gets his shit together. He does eventually go to apologize to Lucas, after which he goes to apologize to Steve. Steve is hanging out at his place with Nancy, because he needs to talk to someone about stuff with Billy, and Billy mistakenly deduces that they're together. This is why he's driving along and sees El on her way to wherever she's going before they get kidnapped.

When Steve and Billy try to have penetrative sex the first time, it isn't very good. I believe because they'd been drinking and having a celebration of sometime and don't communicate well. They try again a second time and it goes way better.

Steve calls Billy "Bill" a fair amount and the author, while writing in Billy's voice, describes the kids as yapping pretty frequently. They also tend to write, 'says, "Ha ha ha!"' instead of 'laughs' which I thought was very endearing and delightful.

I don't remember the specific wording but at one point there's a bit that's sort of like, "Steve is a bitch but fuck yeah that's Billy's bitch."

I know it's not a ton to go on but I'm getting back into Stranger Things fandom recently and was so devastated the other day when I trolled through as many posted Harringrove fic over 80k as I could and didn't see it anywhere.

Any help is appreciated! Feel free to shoot me a DM here on Tumblr/reply to this post. I don't usually see Tumblr messages but you can give that a shot too. Otherwise I'm on Discord as thrillingdetectivetales, too, and you can message me there as well.

Thanks in advance for any assistance!!

[madaboutmunson]

Again - Part 3

Part 1 | Part  2 | Part 4 | Full list of Again series links inc AO3 Link

Steddie fic where Steve and Eddie are in their mid 30's and everyone has sort of drifted apart

This chapter is a bit exposition heavy.

Taglist: @adaed5 @grtwdsmwhr @swimmingbirdrunningrock

Thank you to @callme-keys for all their help with this 💚💚💚

================================================

On the drive home, it's quiet as usual Corey is absorbed in his game, Mackenzie her music, so Steve only has his thoughts for a while. He thinks about two things. First, he thinks about how nice a surprise it had been to see Eddie. Maybe he was due a meet-up with some other friends soon, perhaps something more organised. Secondly, that Morgan kid, well, not the kid himself, Mackenzie's interaction with him.

Steve waves his hand to get her attention and then looks in his rearview mirror at Mac, "So, what did you think? Wanna go back, or shall we try elsewhere? I'm sure there might be others D&D clubs around, right? It's a super popular game! We might just need to drive further out, which is not a problem at all." Steve raises his eyebrows, hopefully.

"Do you want me to find a game somewhere else?" Mackenzie says with a suspicious smile narrowing her eyes at him playfully.

"No! No. Not at all." Steve knows he's given himself away by how high-pitched his voice has gone and the raised eyebrow from Mackenzie and her nodding, turning to look out her window again.

He felt pulled in two different directions, he did not want to put Mackenzie off trying new things, but he also didn't want one of those new things to be that little, probably stoner punk squatting at his house. So he tries a different tactic. "Hey, you know what, it's fine. Eddie's there, and I know he's cool. He'll make sure you're ok there. We go way back" Steve nods to self-affirm and taps the steering wheel to self-soothe.

"Oh, is that why you were whispering to one another behind a book? There was me thinking maybe you'd found something there for yourself, Dad," Mackenzie smirks.

Steve could be mad, but when she smirks, it's his smirk on her face. It just floods him with fondness. He pretends it goes over his head, she's already certain she's smarter than him, and maybe she's right in many ways, to be fair.

"I have no interest in playing any nerdy games unless, of course, you were running one, and needed a player, then I'd happily help out."

She gives an eyebrow raise and upwards nods, laughing to herself. At least he'd succeeded in convincing her he didn't get it. He looks thoughtfully back out onto the road. Truth be told, for a good while, just before he'd met the kid's mom, in fact, he'd been purposefully trying to forget about Eddie. After everything, when everyone was still recovering, Steve felt something. He'd often tried to convince himself it was just a friendly fondness, but sometimes his thoughts would wander a little too far. Steve understood it a little more now, but it was just a big no-no at the time. Society generally was not that accepting, especially with the epidemic that the gay community had been scapegoated with, and then by the time he'd made his peace with the fact that maybe there was something more than friendship. Eddie left. He just packed all his stuff and left. Eddie kept in touch with a few people, but not Steve, at least not directly. For a little while, Steve thought Eddie hated him for something, but then he got an invite to his engagement party. He didn't go. He made up some bullshit excuse and drowned his disappointment in a bar. As luck would have it, the very same night, a beautiful woman, inside and out, happened to be doing the same over someone else, not four seats away from him.

Steve remembers her waving down the bar to get his attention, pointing at him and making a charade for heartbreak. He had raised his tequila shot at her in a cheers motion, and she raised hers back. She waved him over and patted the seat next to her, "Better to be miserable in company than alone, right? Do you wanna go first, or shall I?" She said with a tipsy smile and waved the barman over again for another round. She'd gone first, and then he had told his gender-changed version of events, and she just sat there and listened. In hindsight, it was probably not the smartest move, but they spent that night together, intending never to see one another again. Sometime later, Steve found himself at another bar, this time reeling from the engagement party pictures that had just come back from the developers. Eddie looked so happy. His fiancé was supermodel-level beautiful, and everyone said she was so lovely. All Steve wanted to do was go and be jealous somewhere, so he did, a bit further out of town near a motel so he could stumble back later. 

Then he saw someone waving, laughing so hard she nearly fell off her chair. It was the same woman. This time Steve doesn't wait to be invited to sit next to her. The universe had done that for him. Two broken-hearted lost souls had found one another in the night, not once but twice. Both were happy but hungover in the nearest diner nursing coffees the following day. Finally, Steve bit the bullet and asked, "Look, would you maybe wanna go on an actual date with me sometime? You know, rather than just getting wasted and fooling around?" He wished he'd said it looking into her eyes, but he'd said it into his coffee because he was anticipating the worst.

"I mean, sure, I'd love to. Maybe we could get wasted and fool around every other weekend?" She laughed, and as he looked up, her face was painted with the most radiant smile. From then on, they were barely apart. They initially found their feet and humble beginnings, but things accelerated to warp speed. On a whim, they got randomly married in Vegas, and she, Jenny, found out she was pregnant a few weeks later. Steve promised her a better home and a proper wedding after the baby was born, and when his trust fund finally landed, he could do all of that.

Baby Mackenzie entered Steve's world, and it changed him forever. He had always had these nurturing protective instincts, but not like this. This was their baby, his baby, and he'd do everything he could to ensure she would be safe no matter what happened to him. Enter the financial experts and boy, did they pay off. Steve and Jenny didn't have to work if they didn't want to. They moved to a community Steve was more used to, like where he grew up. He knew how it all worked. The problem was Jenny didn't. She tried her best to fit in, but it wasn't her scene. Steve tried to tell her it didn't matter. They had each other. He would happily go to all the traditional mother's meeting events. He didn't care; he loved it, but Jenny started to feel less than. So she went back to work, which made her happy for a while, but strains started coming back a few years into it. So they tried for another baby, and Corey was born, and again, everything was fine for a while. Mackenzie was in a great school, Steve loved being the stay-at-home parent, and Jenny went back to work. Then It started to crumble again, almost like they were on some weird five-year cycle.

So they sat down one night and talked it over. It wasn't an easy conversation, but it was easy for both of them to want the best for someone who had been their best friend, champion and confidant for the last 11 years. There were no arguments or bad feelings, but there was a loss. A sense of failure, an upheaval for the kids, and a new terrible thing for both of them but Steve especially, having to spend a whole week without his two little nuggets. It was a personal hell of his. When people asked, he pretended he was happy with the break and rest, and sure, who doesn't appreciate a bit more sleep, right? But what do you need all that energy for if you aren't going to do anything with it? So he got a dog, a rescue, a huge dark shaggy furred beast of a mixture of who knows what. Steve was going to give her a more dignified name, but Corey had insisted she be called Beans, so it stuck. Every other week Steve invested his time and patience into training Beans, and soon she was fetching his paper, accompanying him on runs, her recall impeccable, her trick portfolio extensive. Steve wondered if he had a knack for this or if Beans was just a genius dog, but then the neighbours got a dog, and during the day, when they were out at work, Steve would take care of it and train it.  Soon word spread, and it became Steve's bi-weekly business venture. 

All of that was enough for Steve. He didn't need more. A partner would be lovely, but it wasn't a necessity. Jenny had moved on pretty quickly after their divorce, and to his surprise, more than anyone else's, he wasn't jealous, but he was curious. He never believed Jenny would cheat on him, but the rapid uptake of someone new made Steve think she had been missing something from Steve for all those years. Maybe he'd done something wrong? He'd been on the verge of asking many times, but he didn't want Jenny back, so what was the point in asking? The next person could want very different things.

As they pull up on the driveway, Steve runs through the comforting predictability of arriving home. He knows every beat of it. Beans is already barking, then a patch of silence, her face at the window, almost like she’s double checking, it's him. One big loud bark before she runs to the door to open it and runs outside to them. Steve first, then Mac, then Corey. Then she’ll circle them, herding them inside, and once the door is closed, she sits next to her cupboard and waits for her treat, which Steve provides. Mackenzie heads upstairs, swapping music through her headphones for music out of the speakers. Corey puts away his game and calls Beans over for snuggles in front of the TV. Steve seeks out sustenance for his mini tribe, and then finally, he can sit down with the paper.

It used to bother him that the kids went off and did their own things. In some ways, he felt a little lonely but also guilty. Shouldn't he be doing more? More family activities for them all to do together? But the harder he tried with these things, the more resistance he got because, ultimately, Steve was trying to provide his kids with a family life and home that he never had. Still, he soon realised how outdated that was, and his pursuit of it was causing tension in the house, so much so that Jenny had to call and speak to him one night when the kids were with her. Steve had tried to defend his actions for a minute, almost resenting the kids for being ungrateful.

“You don’t mean that, Steve. Come on, be fair to them. They do them sometimes. They just don't want to do that stuff all the time anymore. They are older now. I know you know all of this. It just sounds like you don't want to accept it.” She had told him kindly and with compassion for all parties involved.

“I just want them to have what I didn't, Jen, that's all. When they’re older, they’ll understand.” He’d fired back a little more sharply than he’d wanted to.

“Steve. You can’t undo your past, and you are already doing the best thing you can so they don't feel that abandonment you did. You are there. Whenever they need you. You’re there. They won’t feel alone or lost without you. They might find their own friend families, but they won't ever need that because they’ve got us. They’ve got you, ok?” Her words just made Steve fall apart, even over the phone. He knew he was trying too hard but couldn't help himself. That is just who he was. But he had gotten better. He had taken on board that even though they were all separate, they were all home. Safe at home, and that slowly, over time, had become enough for Steve. Well, at least on most days. Days when he hadn't spent the entire night before with his nightmares. Those days he might slip into his old habits, but he was trying his best.

[teeelsie-posts]

⭐️ - anything about What a Day for a Daydream you'd like to share (but more specifically always love your Phil characterisation so would love to know more about that)

Director’s Cut answer about What a Day for a Daydream (Tomorrow I’ll Pay the Dues for Dropping My Load), the Clint/Coulson fic where Clint and Steve get dosed with sex pollen and there's a lot of 3-way angst about it afterward,

Oh, gosh. Okay, that’s an oldie so I’ve had to think about this a bit.  I guess, first, thank you for you for kind words—I’m glad you like the way I characterize Phil. 😘

So, Phil… I really love him and I do love writing him.  I wrote Phlint stuff earlier on and then sort of drifted away to winterhawk, which I also love, but when I’ve dusted Phil off a couple times lately, I’ve thought, Oh, I really love writing Clint/Coulson!  In my mind, he can embody so many great characteristics.  He’s BAMF, for sure, but he’s also smart and strategic.  And maybe most importantly for Clint, he’s kind, understanding, and patient.  To my mind, this pairs so perfectly with Clint and his more volatile past and potential issues.  When I’ve written winterhawk fics, often Clint and Bucky are both damaged and sort of healing together, with Clint and Phil, there’s more yin and yang: Clint’s damaged, Phil’s a more stabilizing influence.

But, as to my characterization of Phil.  There are a couple of things that drive that for me.  First and foremost, when I write, I really try to write my characters as realistic as possible.  This is just me—it’s what I like to read and what I like to write.  I want all of my characters to seem like real people and not caricatures, or perfect idealizations, or… well, let’s just say there’s not going to be a lot of conversations about feelings, and when there are, the conversation is likely to be oblique and/or brief.  So that’s always going to be the base level characterization I’ll bring to Phil: less is more when it comes to discussing feelings, but there will be glimpses of the depth of feelings revealed.  I don’t think there’s anywhere in Daydream where either Phil or Clint says “I love you” to the other (Nat remarks that Phil loves Clint at one point, which they both understand is a given), but I hope that it was clear that they do, they really, really do.  I actually see Phil as being stupidly, incredibly, deeply in love with Clint, and having to work a little bit to contain his emotion about it.  I think Clint knows Phil loves him, but I don’t think he has any idea just how crazy in love Phil is.

Second, and I’ve said this in A/N and comments more than once, I heavily base my Phil, and my Phil/Clint relationship, on the characterization of him and them that can be found in dentalfloss’ masterpiece, In Wade We Trust (We Are So Screwed).  That fic is really a Clint and Wade friendship story, but the brief glimpses of Phil/Clint in that fic, I absolutely adore.  They have an easy, comfortable relationship based on mutual respect (and for sure, love, though they never say it) and there’s no power imbalance (which is one thing I strongly dislike and will never write).  Her Phil is wry and funny and subtle, and I always try to have my Phil replicate her Phil.  Sometime, when I’m writing Phlint, I’ll read that fic first, to get it fresh in my brain before I start writing.

So, Daydream… Phil in that fic is barely contained fury, but he works hard to hold it in.  But he’s not perfect, and he loses a little bit of control when he sees Clint’s condition “after”, which of course sets things up for Clint to worry that he’s mad at Clint.  Phil’s furious and he tries to pretend he’s mad at Rogers, or himself (and for sure, there’s some of that), but really, given the circumstances, there’s no convenient outlet for his anger so he’s bottling it up.  It’s why his anger flares when Clint offers to let Phil fuck him – because he feels so helpless in the situation and he is a man who is always in control.  In truth, writing that whole protracted scene, when Clint makes that offer and then they argue in the kitchen and Clint leaves and then he comes back and they resolve things in the bed, was probably my favorite writing in that entire, long fic. I enjoyed writing it a lot.  I actually really enjoy writing dialog when I have a clear end goal, and so much of that scene was pre-formed in my brain, it flowed out really easily.  Love that.

Oh, I also liked the bit where Clint lashed out at Phil and Phil was all calm and reasonable about it, and later Clint sits down next to him and Phil says “Meow” because he’d made reference earlier to Clint being like a cat thrown in water. One of my betas suggested that maybe it would be better to have Clint say meow, as a sort of admitting he’d overreacted, but I left it, because I really like the idea that Phil understands that Clint’s going through a difficult time, but he’s also going to call him out on his shit.  Gently, though. And that’s all that was necessary – Phil saying “meow”, Clint huffing and acknowledging he was a shit, and that’s all they need to resolve the tension, because they know each other that well.  And they’re grown-ass adult men who are willing to acknowledge their bad behavior and apologize for it. (That’s important). 

Oh, one last thing about that fic: it was from a prompt on the AvengersKink and so when I initially started writing it, it was only posted there, but that site was a nightmare to post on and if a fic was long, each successive pieces was indented further, so I got to the point where there were only one or two words across before a new line started. 😅 Eventually I said fuck it, and posted it over here. I can’t actually remember if I posted all of this over there or not. 🤷🏻‍♀️

Okay, I’m pushing 1000 words here, so I guess I should wrap this up. I’ve actually had a lot of fun on this little trip down memory lane so thanks for the ask, nony!  I hope this is what you were hoping to see, but feel free to follow up if you have any more questions because obviously I’m happy to blather on about fic!

Director’s Cut ask game.

[astharoshebarvon]

To think there are people actually celebrating the death of a boy whose tragic and horrifying end even their fav regretted shows exactly how straight shippers/homophobes minds work, you know they are the ones who despise lucerys/aemond.

Anti Lucerys tag? Ugh, seriously? What did the boy ever do to you except being shipped with Aemond in fandom thus driving straight shippers, homophobes completely mad.

Then they shouldn’t get upset if other side says we look forward to Daemon driving the dark sister through his nephew. That fact will never ever change. I look forward to Caraxes biting grandma Vhagar’s neck. And he is the one who at least gets to the shore with his last breath. Go Caraxes!

You can’t quote your books one second and dismiss the show then quote show and dismiss the book. Pick one.

This weird behaviour isn’t even something new. I’ve seen it enough times that now I just feel kind of tired. It’s just - sometimes it gets too much, the homophobic comments and attitude, people excusing women off their gross actions, not calling bastard women bastard, because gasp, we can’t do that. Not calling women rapists even if the book shows you they were that.

I am sorry Tom Riddle Sr, you have always been a victim and are still reviled by the mad fandom and author. Good of you to run from your rapist and never forgiving her. You deserve to be applauded for being brave.

As someone who likes Ben Barnes and adored his portrayal of Darkling, you could see how manipulative, power hungry he was, he was brilliant!

I can say without hesitation his character deserves to be in purgatory regardless of how good looking he is. Did I like how he controlled the volcra and came out of the fold, yes! Do I look forward to him being defeated? Yes!

It’s hilarious how far straight shippers will go to excuse a character’s horrendous actions. I am sorry if you think how he looked the other way with Genya is not extremely vile of him. What good person doesn’t care if the people they are supposed to care about are hurt like that?

And, no I don’t care if people ship Darkling and Alina or not. I read a few works of it on ao3 and laughed when most were grooming, that creepy parent kink, pseudo parent child relationship. It turned me off the ship completely.

I like Lucerys/Aemond but if you are going to sit there and say that boy deserved to die then I feel sorry for you. Though it doesn’t stop the straight purists from erasing the boy from HIS ship and putting their self insert/ofc and clogging the MM ship tag with their fem luc bull.

Have a bit decency, even his name tag says son. Ugh.

The best part of this whole thing is straight shippers getting upset and saying slash ship will be forgotten once xyz fem characters comes.

Now lets take a look at how true that statement is. It’s not.

Witcher

Geralt/Jaskier- 19k thousand fics and lots of fanart and shippable moments. Top ship on tumblr, pretty sure ship with Yennefer didn’t make it and has 2k fics. But they have sex scenes on the show so, yeah.

Steve/Aunty, I refuse to call her anything else. It’s laughed at by even casual viewers. My friend doesn’t ship Stucky and she was like, why’d he go back to aunt ? What is this?

Stucky and Stony’s popularity shouldn’t even be a surprise.

Mcu is so hell bent on shoving straight steve down people’s throats they have to specify he is not a virgin and had sex with a female in their lame shows. As if it’s a crime if he died virgin or is asexual. God, seriously!

And that show invalidated Bruce’s trauma. We should forget the man put a bullet in his mouth and care about their lame, dumb girlboss show character.

Merlin/Arthur- it’s been almost a decade and they are still loved.

Sirius/Remus- I needn’t elaborate, it’s that loved.

Thorki, it still remains to this day popular ship for both characters.

not loki with mary sue oc was loathed by people who don’t even care about thorki, so, there is that too.

Hannigram! Still beloved by so manys that it’s embarrassing if you try to say but the sex scenes were with females. Please don’t. You have to be deaf, blind and plain stupid if you think they werent a thing.

Anakin and Obi Wan, yup, it exists and is loved, even more after the show came.

I can go on but it would just become embarrassing and pitiable.

My beloved cherik, Erik Lehnsherrr/Charles Xavier. I should just stop.

I am not surprised by this behaviour since the fans of got deluded themselves with thinking jonsa was a thing, and it was somehow better than aunt nephew since they are cousins. Incest is incest, don’t be stupid.

I dislike both, Jon is happier with his wolf, grey ghost than with either women. It’s predominantly het fandom and now they are pissed a MM ship is getting all the love. Isn’t that the crux of the situation? God, don’t take it out on that sweet boy, he doesn’t deserve it.

Then again this callous behaviour shouldn’t be surprising. I remember seeing top tumblr ships post of last year, characters posts and even there the posters were upset that majority of ships were slash. Only twenty percent were straight or something like that, they even went so far as to say this isn’t diversity. Seriously?

My God, please, don’t be so horrid. Don’t get so pressed if people like gay ships.

[queenofspades6]

New Haircut – Stephen Strange x Reader

Summary: Stephen Strange broke your heart to protect you from himself, but when you leave the Sanctum without a word, he realised his mistake, but you’re gone… are you really?

Pairings: Stephen Strange x Reader.

Warnings: None! Just pure fluff and angst.

Author Note: Hi! I just had a new haircut, and I thought ‘what if I wrote a fic with trader having a new haircut, and Stephen Strange’. I hope you’ll like it! Feel free to like, comment and reblog my work, I am forever grateful for the support!

Want more Marvel? It’s here.

———

Being Stephen Strange’s apprentice and also an Avenger wasn’t always easy. With the death of Tony Stark, Natasha Romanoff and Steve Rogers, you couldn’t keep living in the Avenger Tower. Stephen Strange had always been of your deepest friends, and watching your distress, he asked you if you would love to learn the Mystic Arts. Without a second thought, you said yes.

And here you were, being his apprentice. There was always a spark of attractiveness, a spark of ‘something more’ between Stephen and you, but at the time he was with Christine, and then, he couldn’t let her go. However, with your stay at the Sanctum, everything changed. You were taught the Mystic Arts by several Masters, and obviously Stephen was your favorite. He was always spending more time to you, throwing you small glances when you were training, and always helping you practice after. To say you were in love with Stephen Strange was an understatement. But when you tried to tell him how you felt, Stephen almost rejected you. Not directly of course, but it still hurt. You could remember this night like it was yesterday.

“Stephen? Can we talk?”

He was sitting on the rooftop looking at the sun slowly retreating himself.

“About what?”He answered.

“About what I feel, how I feel towards you.”

His gaze was fixed on you, admiring your features, and how your brows were furrowed, scarily waiting for his answer. He took a deep breath before answering.

“We can’t.”

“What?”

“ I-I… You, and me, we can’t.”He repeated, not daring to look at you.

“And why’s that?”You questioned, your hands on your hips, anger rising in you.

“You know why.”

“I don’t. But what I know is how infuriating you can be sometimes, Stephen!”

His fists clenched, and his gaze remained on the ground.

“There’s Christine.”He spat, without looking at your face.”I still care for her.”

And with these words, your heart broke. He was still in love with Christine, probably in every universe, and there was nothing you could do about it. It was just meant to be.

So, you did what you did best. Fleeing. You left the Sanctum for a month, leaving a small note to Wong and Strange.

“I’ll come back.”

And you left.

Stephen spent weeks trying to understand what he did wrong, what led you to leave. He knew deep down; he was the one responsible. Lately, he had been cold with you, making you think he didn’t really care. And he remembered the conversation you had with him before leaving. You tried to confess, and even if he didn’t want to, he rejected you. It was easier for him to reject you, than love you. He was terrified of hurting you, and ruin everything. But while trying to protect you of himself, he lost you, and he couldn’t forgive himself.

‘What if she doesn’t come back?’Stephen asked himself every night. ‘What if she’s dead?’ So many ‘What if’ without any answer. It was driving him mad. He knew if you had left, it was for a good reason, and he had no right to look for you. He couldn’t. And he waited. Days after days, transforming into weeks. He was losing hope, every day telling himself ‘one more day, and I’ll look for her’ but he never did.

“Don’t go looking for her, Stephen.”Wong told him once in an authoritarian tone.

“What if she’s hurt? Or worse, what if she’s been kidnapped?”

“She’s not. Don’t forget who she is. She is not a child; she can handle herself without you.”

“But-“

“No, but, Strange. You didn’t lose her. Not yet.”Wong spilled.

“Not yet?”

“Nobody’s irreplaceable, Strange, and if you don’t say what you feel to Y/N, she’ll move on. She’s not gonna wait forever.”

Stephen Strange nodded. Wong was right. He needed to face his fears, once and for good.

*****

And one day, when he didn’t expect you the most, you entered the Sanctum, a huge smile on your face and a new haircut. Instead of your long brown hair, he found you with a square cut. You had left the Sanctum’s robes for a lighter outfit, a skirt and a t-shirt. When Stephen saw you, he couldn’t ignore your white aura lightening the room. He smiled.

You had finally returned.

He approached you with a sudden shyness.

“Y/N.”He murmured, almost like a prayer.

“Stephen.”You smiled.

“You look-“

“Beautiful? Brilliant? I know.”

A smile escaped his lips.

“I was going to say different, but that works too.”

“I needed some change. I needed to find myself.”You whispered, smiling shyly.

“I know, he replied, I am sorry.”

You frowned.

“You don’t need to be. Now I know how you feel. I am glad you told me.”

“Y/N-“Stephen tried to say.

“Let me finish, Stephen.”

He glanced at you and nodded.

“It was hard at first, but I am glad I know the truth. Better the truth than a sweet lie. And I needed to lose you to love me. Don’t apologize.”

Stephen saw the hurt on your face, and he hated himself for that. He wanted to protect you, and he failed. Because he lied to you, he destroyed you. ‘And what if I try?’He asked himself, fearing the answer.

“Stephen? Do you hear me? If you don’t wanna see me again, I’ll leave. Just say the word.”You bluttered, tears stinging in your eyes.

“Y/N! Listen to me.”

You didn’t want to, you wanted to flee again, and never return, but you had changed, and that new haircut gave you confidence.

“I am sorry I hurt you.”Stephen muttered.”I am scared, Y/N. I am terrified that if I let myself love you, I’ll hurt you.”

He took a deep breath, before looking right into your eyes.

“I lied when I told you I still loved Christine. I don’t. She’s happy, and I understood I wasn’t the one for her. And now, I am scared, I’ll hurt you too, Y/N, if I let myself love you.”

Tears were running down your cheeks, and Stephen was looking for your hands. He grabbed your hands and caressed them slowly.

“But what if it works, Stephen? What if you take the chance? Because if you don’t, you’ll never know the answer.”

He caught one tear falling on your cheek and wiped it with his hand.

“Love can hurt, Stephen Strange, but with the right person, it’s worth it.”You declared, a new spark of hope in your eyes.

“I love you, Y/N. Deeply. Sincerely. Universally. I won’t lie to you, I am scared I am not good enough for you, but without you gone for a month, i know I want to try. I need to try. I can’t ask myself everyday ‘what if she was with me?’."

You sobbed. It was too much to process right now.

“Y/N, be with me, you won’t regret it, I promise.”

You approached him, and he took some shy steps towards you. His hand touched your face and lingered on your cheek where the tears were falling, and then on your lips, where he had dreamed of kissing you. His lips were dangerously close, and you couldn’t say no to the feeling in your stomach. You kissed him. His lips were intertwined with yours in a passionate kiss, and his hands were rested on your back.

“Be with me.”He declared, almost like an order.

“I will.”

Stephen Strange smiled, and you swore you saw some tears in the corner of his eyes.

In Stephen’s arms, you smiled, and laughed.

“What is it?”He questioned.

“It’s my new haircut that made you change your mind?”You asked in answer, still laughing in his neck.

“Definitely.”

It was definitely because of the haircut.

Definitely.

———

Want more fanfictions? You might like this one:

[rosiesramblings]

Oh What a Tangled Web We Weave

Fandom (shocking absolutely no one): Stranger Things, Steddie

WC: 1.2k

A/N: Cranked this out today :) I hope y'all enjoy. I'd like to dedicate this to @fickle-tiction I can't afford a ring so please accept this fic as a token of my love /lh /j I apologize for the frankly excessive use of italics lol.

Eddie didn’t really notice at first. He was so swept up in the absolute whirlwind that was dating Steve Harrington that he didn’t notice anything weird at all.

However, after a few months of dating, after many many (many) hours of kissing and cuddling and touching and mapping out the former King of Hawkins High, he could no longer deny it.

Steve freaked out when Eddie touched his thighs.

The first time Eddie was aware that something was off, they were driving to Hellfire together. Steve in the passenger seat, only white-knuckling the armrests a little bit at Eddie’s driving. Eddie took one hand off the wheel and rested it on Steve’s thigh, in an attempt to be as close to his boyfriend as physically possible.

For a moment, Eddie kept up his mindless chatter. However, when Steve stopped adding little noises to show that he was listening, Eddie glanced at him.

“Stevie? You with me?” 

“Yup,” Steve said, almost an octave higher than his normal voice, back ramrod straight and face red.

Eddie took in his boyfriend’s body language and quickly retracted his hand. “Sweetheart, if you’re ever uncomfortable with something I do, I need you to tell me.”

“No! That’s not what’s happening here, not at all,” Steve rushed to reassure him, grabbing his hand and interlacing their fingers.

They pulled up to the Wheeler’s house, and Eddie shook off the feeling that Steve wasn’t being completely truthful with him. “Okay, baby, but promise me you will tell me if I ever cross a line?”

Steve muttered something about having had Eddie up his ass probably demolished any lines that were ever between them, but Eddie raised an eyebrow and Steve promised to let him know if he ever did anything he was uncomfortable with.

The second time it happened, they were mid makeout. Eddie had Steve pinned against the wall, and tried to do that thing where he lifted the man up off the ground by his thighs. Key word: tried. Steve immediately froze, stopped responding to Eddie’s advances and even stopped breathing.

Concerned, Eddie immediately set him back on the floor and stepped back to give him space. “Hey, breathe, baby. Just breathe. You’re ok.”

But rather than Steve on the verge of a panic attack, which he expected, he was met with that embarrassed flush on his face. He rubbed the back of his neck uncomfortably, before clearing his throat and calling out a “sorry.”

“I wish I knew what you were apologizing for, honey,” Eddie said, still concerned but confused as well.

“...Got lost in my head,” Steve mumbled after a moment. “Want to watch a movie? I stole Labyrinth from Family Video.”

Eddie squinted at Steve, trying to piece him together. He couldn’t figure him out. Finally, he relented. “You have popcorn?”

“Obviously.”

The third time it happened, Eddie couldn’t keep his mouth shut. For a moment, he forgot that they weren’t alone, in fact were in the middle of game night, surrounded by the rest of the “older kids” in their little world-saving posse. 

In the middle of Monopoly (a game he was absolute shit at, by the way) Eddie absentmindedly leaned against Steve, bracing himself on Steve’s thigh.

Just like clockwork, Steve stiffened. Eddie caught on quickly, and without thinking, sprung up from his previously relaxed position.

“Okay, I’m sorry, but we are going to talk about this,” Eddie said, facing his boyfriend, who suddenly looked extremely guilty. “Stevie, baby, if you don’t want me touching you, if I’m making you uncomfortable, I need to know. I’m not going to be mad, or upset, or whatever it is you think I’m going to be, but relationships are based on fucking trust, and I need to be able to trust that you will tell me when something's wrong.”

Steve rubbed a tired hand over his eyes, face once again burning. “... It’s not that, Eds. I promise.”

“Then what the fuck is it?” Eddie asked disbelievingly.

Suddenly, hysterical laughter rang out. Eddie and Steve turned to face Nancy goddamn Wheeler, who was laughing like Eddie had just told the funniest joke she’d ever heard.

Steve’s face, impossibly, got redder. “Shut up, Nance,” he mumbled.

Nancy wiped the tears from her eyes. “You’re telling me he doesn’t know yet? How the hell did you pull that off? I think I found out within two days of us dating.”

“Yeah, well, the Steve Harrington that you dated hadn’t been through a Russian interrogation yet,” Steve snarked back. “It definitely... gave me a better poker face”

“Christ on a crutch, what the fuck are we talking about?” Eddie was this close to pulling out his own hair.

Steve squirmed where he was sitting, hand coming up once again to cover his eyes. “I’m sorry, Eds, it’s just… “ he made a noise at the back of his throat that was almost a whine. “I’m like… really ticklish ok?”

“... What.”

Steve huffed out a despairing breath. “It’s the worst on my thighs, and I know you, Eddie Munson. I knew the second you found out, I’d never fucking know peace again, so I tried to just… power through it whenever you touched me. I didn’t mean for you to think you were the problem,” Steve peered up at him guiltily.

Eddie blinked. Processing.

“I still don’t know how you managed to hide it for months,” Nancy giggled. “You two are way more touchy than we ever were.”

Steve looked at Nancy with a glare. “Eds doesn’t have your nails, Nance, Jesus ChriHIHIHIHIHIHIHIHIST.” His retort ended with what could only be described as a scream-laugh. All eyes in the room snapped down to where Eddie was now mercilessly kneading his thighs, just above his knees.

“You’re telling me, you let me think that you had a problem with me touching you, for months,” Eddie squeezed harshly, “Because you didn’t want to get tickled?”

“OHOHOHMYGOD, Eddie plehehehheehehehease,” Steve was begging already, shaking his head back and forth and making his hair flop into his face.

Eddie couldn’t keep up the pissed-off charade for long, though. Steve was just too fucking cute. He lightened his touches and started climbing higher, laughing when Steve cackled desperately.

“Don’t you ‘Eddie, please,’ me,” he said. “I have been agonizing over this for ages. You deserve this and more, asshole.”

“Ihihihihihi’m sohohohoOHOHOHOHRRY,” Steve called out, tears trickling down the sides of his face.

“Yeah, you’re gonna be, by the time I’m fucking through with you,” Eddie muttered.

“Don’t kill him, Eddie,” Robin, of all people, spoke up in Steve’s defense. “I need my job buddy.”

Eddie gave one last squeeze to Steve’s legs before letting go, noticing Steve’s face was a little too red for comfort. “You’re lucky you’ve got Buckley in your corner,” Eddie said, still playfully angry.

Steve rolled to one side and curled up, still laughing. “Fuhuhuhuhuhuck, Eds. Yohohou trying to kihihihihihill mehehehe?”

“I’m so not sorry, baby,” Eddie said, tossing his hair dramatically over his shoulder. “Actions have consequences.”

Steve held up his middle finger in response. Eddie laughed and shook his head.

“You were right, though, Stevie.”

“Whahahat?”

“You’re never going to know peace again.”

“Gohohoddammit.”

[marvelslut16]

Betty

Pairing: Steve Harrington x reader

Word count: 1.8k

Summary: Based off of Taylor Swift's Betty, so it's written in Steve's pov. You're away for an internship the entire summer, and Steve is lonely and tempted by Nancy.

Warnings: Angst. Cheating. Swearing. Alludes to sex, but no graphic descriptions of it, but still minors DNI. My bad writing. Steve is a whole asshole.

A/N: I was supposed to be writing a valentines fic, but Betty kept coming up on shuffle and I ended up writing this. This isn't edited so I'm sorry if there's a typo, or if it just sucks. It's also canon divergent, the timeline doesn't match the show exactly. I used a season 1 gif because I could totally see season 1 Steve doing what he does in this fic.

My breath catches in my throat when I drive by your house and I catch a glimpse of the rose garden you love so much, the one your dad planted for your mom years ago when they got into a fight. I’m driving Dustin to meet his friends at the pool one last time before the school year starts up again. This time last year you were riding shotgun hand sitting atop mine on the gearshift, Dustin sitting in the back and the two of you were belting out the lyrics to juke box hero with no care in the world. It was so nice and refreshing seeing you this way, you were always guarded at school, scared that Tommy H. and Carol would find the smallest thing to make fun of you for. But with me you let your real personality show, and it was you, Dustin, and me against the world.

But now you're not here, you got an offer to intern for the Governor and you couldn’t turn that down. The plans of picnics and countless pool dates, carefree normal dates that we never got to have because we started dating after the upside down open up and evil was lurking behind every corner, all those plans were thrown out the window when you chose to spend the entire summer in Indianapolis, away from me. I called you that first week in June and told you I was going to come visit you at your hotel, but you told me no because you didn’t have free time and you didn’t want me to be stuck in the room all day while you were working. At least that’s the excuse you used, but I got in my head and I started to worry that I wasn’t good enough for you, that you’re too smart for me.

So when Nancy, fresh out of yet another break up with Jonathan, pulled up next to me in her mom’s car when I was walking home because my dad got mad and took my car away again, I couldn’t tell her no. We drove around and talked for the first time since she dumped me, and it was cathartic, you taught me that word when we were studying for the SAT’s. I made the worst mistake of my life that night, Nancy pulled off onto a secluded side street, leaned across the center console and kissed me. My initial reaction was to push her off of me, she wasn’t you, but she was wearing your perfume. Nancy always liked the sweet stuff, but I never liked it, it was too floral and it always made me sneeze. But that night, she was wearing your perfume, it was spicy and if I closed my eyes tight enough I could pretend I was kissing you. I could pretend that you were with me and not in that fancy hotel room in Indianapolis where you could meet another intern that was smarter than me, and you’d realize you’re too good for me. You weren’t here, your dreams took you away from me, and I knew in the moment you told me about the internship that your dreams would take you away from me for good one day.

One night turned into two, which turned into seven, and that turned into every night for a month. I would drop Dustin off wherever he was meeting his friends and Nancy would do the same with Mike, my eyes would meet hers and the next thing I knew would be in the back of one of our cars or in my bedroom because my parents went away on business again. I always swore I would never be like my father, never cheat on my girl so many times that she’d have to come on trips with me just so I would keep it in my pants and I wouldn’t stray. But there I was, two weeks into your internship and I had already spent multiple nights with Nancy.

Nancy wore your perfume the entire summer, I don’t know if she did it on purpose, I think she might have, but it really was the only reason I caved the first night. I missed you so much and I just wanted you safe in my arms, back home where you belong. I was desperate to feel you again, and like with the kiss, I could close my eyes and pretend it was you I was falling in bed with. As the weeks went on I came to terms with the fact that it was Nancy that would fall apart in my arms and not you, but every time I came down from my high I thought endlessly of you. I thought of the way you would bite the eraser of your pencil to keep from laughing when I still wouldn’t get a math problem when you had already explained it to me multiple times during lunch. Or the way your body looked in your swimsuit that night you spent at my house last September, my parents were away and she said you were sleeping at a friends, and we stayed up until way past one in the morning just goofing around in the pool; you caught a cold later that week, the air was too cold for your wet hair.

But when all of those happy memories would fade I would think of the start of my insecurities, our junior prom. Ever since I had fallen out of popularity I hated going to school functions like dances, but you had putted when I told you I didn’t want to go to prom, and I didn’t want to disappoint you. I made a big deal of asking you at one of the basketball games, the cheerleaders danced to waiting for a girl like you at half time, it was our song. You of course said yes, and I was ecstatic when you made sure my tie matched your dress a million times because you didn’t want the colors to be off, and when I spent an hour picking out the best corsage for you. But when we entered the dance, I don’t know what happened, I just knew I wanted to be anywhere that wasn’t in that suffocating gym. So I left you leaning against the closed bleachers while I went to get some air, left you swaying to your favorite REO Speedwagon song.

It shouldn’t have surprised me when I walked back in and I saw you dancing and singing to Bohemian Rhapsody with Billy, of course he would take this opportunity to make me look worse to our classmates. My girlfriend was dancing with the guy that dethroned me, who says he wouldn’t take you from my clutches next. At the end of the night you swore to me that the only reason you danced with Billy was because you didn’t want to embarrass him by saying no, and that you wanted to dance. In hindsight I should have danced with you that night, you love dancing and I just left you for the taking. But really, you sowed the seed of doubt in my brain, so who could blame an insecure teen for doing what I did?

One day in August when my parents and Nancy's were home, we pulled into an alley and started to go at it in the backseat of my car, the same spot where you cuddled up to my side and told me about your future, our future, outside of Hawkins. I buried my face in Nancy’s neck while she rode me, that way I could smell your perfume and I wouldn’t have to look at Nancy and be taken out of my dream. I didn’t notice when Tommy H. and Carol walked over to the car to see who was fogging up the windows. I didn't notice until it was too late, until Carol had seen everything, Nancy’s blouse was pulled open, her skirt pushed up around her hips, and my pants pulled down my thighs. There was no mistaking what we were doing, and when I locked eyes with her I knew I was screwed. Carol hated you, but she hated me more, there was no way that she wouldn’t tell you what she saw.

Carol was waiting for you at your house when Robin picked you up from the train station, at least that’s what Carol told me. She rubbed it in my face that she beat me to you, that she had told her everything she saw, that she told you about the entire summer. I know that if Carol told you this without Robin you wouldn’t have believed the bully, but I know Robin would never lie to you and she’ll tell you that I never hung out with her once this summer. All I can hope is that when I stop by later you’ll give me a chance to explain, I was just a desperate horny teenager, but I missed you and thought about you the entire time. Nancy means nothing to me, but you mean everything.

Your family is having a small get together to celebrate the end of your internship and to welcome you back home, Robin and I are the only friends you invited. I was counting down the days until this party, until I could see you again, but not after Carol told you what I did. For weeks I dreamt of you running into my arms and kissing me in front of Robin and your family, of holding you close and making everything right. I wasn’t planning on telling you about my summer fling with Nancy, but now that you know I’ll do everything in my power to get you to forgive me, get you to hold my hand and rock out to Foreigner with Dustin while we drive around Hawkins again.

Now I’m on your doorstep holding a bouquet of red roses, and all I can do is hope you’ll hear me out. Hope you won’t slam the door in my face and tell me to go fuck myself, hope that you’ll lead me to the rose garden, away from everyone else, and let me explain. I hope that you’ll let me kiss you, let it be everything I’ve dreamt of since you left, let it be enough to fix what’s happened between us. When I finally build up the courage to ring your doorbell you answer, Robin by your side. You look sad, crushed even, and it fills me with guilt, but Robin is glaring at me, if looks could kill I would be dead. How can either of you really blame me for what happened? I’m just a horny teen I didn’t know any better, but I know that I missed you desperately the entire time.

“Go fuck yourself.”

[puppypeter]

These are all dark fics, READ THE TAGS before reading the fics. It is your responsibility to check whether what you are about to read is something that you can stomach. While most of these fics are based around trauma, recovery etc many feature triggering scenes or flashbacks as well as darker themes. Please be safe and don’t read them if they can be triggering for you! Proceed with caution! Most of them are Hydra Trash, but still not just the ugly bits as I like there to be a plot. Hiding them below the cut:

between scylla and charybdis | 21590 words

Sam Wilson has been witness to a lot of things he wishes he could unsee. Civilian families shot dead in their cars because of miscommunications at checkpoints. Riley’s body spiralling to the ground in a smoke-plumed plummet. His own face in his bathroom mirror after waking up hung-over as hell at two in the afternoon, the day after the anniversary of Riley’s death, year after year after year.

And now, in an abandoned bunker on the outskirts of Boston, a seemingly unremarkable manila folder at the bottom of a filing cabinet.

Berceuse | 10730 words

There are strange, new things Bucky needs from Steve.

Dreamers Often Lie | 11040 words

As far as Bucky remembers, sex is something that is painful and terrifying if you wake up while it's happening. As the Asset, sleeping through sex was a rare treat. When Steve lets Bucky know he's interested in a sexual relationship, what Steve doesn't know is that they have fundamentally different ideas of what that entails.

despite the threatening sky and the shuddering earth (they remained) | 71532 words

“They really didn’t want the mask to come off.” Hill thumbed through the scans, and pulled out a film that she then handed over to Sam, face mostly expressionless but for the flat line of her pursed lips.

Sam accepted the film and held it up to the light, angling so both he and Steve could see it, squinting at the outline of the Winter Soldier’s skull, and the blips of unnatural white that showed up, God, in his brain, not to mention about half his teeth, plus the mask, with its thin protrusions—

“Those are pins,” Steve realized. He looked over at Hill. “The mask—it’s nailed to his face.”

Hill’s face was as unmoved as ever. “Like I said. They really didn’t want it coming off.”

Fire And Water For Your Love | 77084 words

When the Avengers investigate an abandoned HYDRA base on behalf of S.H.I.E.L.D., they unexpectedly encounter a dark-haired man with a torn metal arm, who leads them to an even more shocking discovery deeper inside the base. The Avengers must reconcile what they have found with the lies S.H.I.E.L.D. has been telling for decades.

Give An Inch | 5070 words

The Captain has a warm smile and clear, open eyes. The Soldier knows these are tricks. He's fallen for them before and he won't do it again.

Humans As Gods | 4818 words

"HYDRA's scientists had been delighted to find their serum-reversal procedure had worked. Their jubilation was dampened by the discovery that Steve's smaller self might no longer be Captain America-sized but was still 100% Steve Rogers, and Steve Rogers was now mad enough to spit nails. A minor oversight in the design of the containment area meant that smaller-Steve had simply wriggled out of the now ridiculously-oversized restraints like an angry ferret escaping a paper bag, and punched the nearest technician in the nuts.

Chaos ensued."

HYDRA scientists successfully de-serum Captain America, only to discover that they are utterly unprepared for Steve Rogers. Meanwhile, the Winter Soldier follows his instructions to the letter. This works out just great.

The Only One That Needs To Know | 6571 words

Bucky can't control his body. He can only control what secrets he keeps.

I Was Wearing My Blue Coat | 11503 words

Following exposure of his past as the Winter Soldier, anonymous postings of explicit video footage, 63 charges of murder and the wrath of the Internet, James Buchanan "Bucky" Barnes finally steps into the limelight and tells his story to Zenat Patel of the New York Times.

Compliance Will Be Rewarded | 4767 words

Someone told him once: "Compliance will be rewarded," and he remembers pressing his head against a man’s leg in open supplication. He remembers hands in his hair, and a gentle grip on the back of his neck. He remembers a man telling him "so good, so good for me aren't you?" And he remembers nodding his head in a desperate attempt to be exactly as good as he was supposed to be.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Bucky Barnes is physically free from Hydra, but the hold on his mind lingers still. All he wants is to go home, and he'll do anything he can to get there.

To Burn Your Kingdom Down | 12370 words

The Avengers go after a Hydra splinter cell with a nasty habit of brutalizing their prisoners. Steve has some ugly history with them, and when a rescue mission gone wrong leaves him and Sam in enemy hands, the situation gets uglier still.

Worth The Wound | 7709 words

The asset knows that maintenance is better than punishment. But with Steve, maintenance becomes more pleasant, soft and gentle and everything he could dream of. It was only natural that he decided to prolong that maintenance a little longer.

The Spaces In-Between | 6971 words | Part 1 of What We Tried So Hard To Hide Away

"Memories are like buckets of water: they weigh on the heart and the brain until the body fails. You're blessed to stay forgetful and young, Soldier."

Sometimes blessings feel like curses.

Illuminate The Scene | 7086 words | Part 2 of What We Tried So Hard To Hide Away

The doctors had wanted to keep the Soldier. Shock him and freeze him until he was fixed, or tear him to scrap if he couldn’t be repaired so that he wouldn’t be an entirely wasted investment. Steve is the only thing stopping them.

When the Soldier can't trust his own body, how can he trust anything?

All These Riots Of Broken Sound | 83790 words | Part 1 of Forever Is A Close And Honest Friend

When Steve and the team return to Avengers tower to find Bucky gone, they must venture into B.A.R.F. to figure out what triggered him to leave and hunt those who wronged him. Trapped in a simulation of Bucky's worst memories with rogue HYDRA agents waiting to strike, 100 years of secrets, lies, pain and love drive the team to their limit and push Steve towards a realisation that is a century in the making.

I Was Lost But Left A Trace | 3585 words | Part 2 of Forever Is A Close And Honest Friend

Disorientated, the Asset reached up to wipe at the moisture on its cheeks and was shocked to find it clear, instead of the crimson it has been expecting. It didn’t understand why this misidentification had caused uproarious laughter from the technicians.

“It is not blood,” the Asset told him, “but it is still a malfunction.”

This sobered the technician a little, and he nodded tightly.

“Yes. It is. But we will fix you.”

I’ll Always Be Blamed For The Sun Going Down | 9907 words | Part 3 of Forever Is A Close And Honest Friend

He knows he’s in the right place. He has heard the guys at the docks laugh and joke about the queers who come out after dark, looking to earn a little extra cash. He has seen the johns, when he’s been out late enough, skulking in the shadows like predators hunting for their next meal, looking for something in particular. Sometimes they look at him.

A small, rusty pen knife that his father had picked up in Europe during the Great War sits heavy in the breast pocket of his jacket. Just in case.

Book Of The Moon | 16019 words | Part 4 of Forever Is A Close And Honest Friend

In 1929, Bucky Barnes falls in love for the first time and resigns himself to never telling a soul, let alone Steve, the object of his affections. In 1943, half a world away from the man he can never have and fighting for his life and his sanity, something new begins to bloom.

Habeas Corpus | 18054 words

An unexpected incident in the field leaves Steve Rogers facing the infiltration of a Hydra base and retrieval of important intelligence, all while pretending to be the Winter Soldier. Unfortunately, there are important aspects of the Soldier's past that Bucky hasn't disclosed, and Steve has no idea what he's really walking into.

Bullies | 14979 words

Written for the MCU trash meme prompt:

I wanna see Steve being messed with by his secretly-HYDRA coworker buddies. I want them generally fucking with him, "accidentally" doing terrible things to him or getting Steve into awful situations, telling jokes that aren't really jokes, gaslighting, performing sexual-assault hazing under the guise that "that's what people do now," pressuring him into other sex shit, anything, just fuck Steve up.

Steve isn't failing to fully catch on because he's dumb or oblivious: it's just that he is Steve, so he wants to believe the best of everybody, and he doesn't want to believe that he could be working for/with bullies and that (as Natasha says) he essentially died for nothing.

Not Unwanted, Not Unloved | 50320 words

They'd resigned themselves to never becoming parents - until Bucky gets pregnant and drops off the grid without even a whisper to his mate about his condition. Steve will still raze the earth to find him, but that doesn't mean he likes what he finds.

The Tones That Tremble Down Your Spine | 13889 words

Tony tells him they’re planning a party for Steve’s birthday. He knows how parties are supposed to go.

Lacuna | 62875 words

The Winter Soldier doesn't remember Steve Rogers, but he needs Rogers' help.

OR: The one where Bucky doesn't remember Steve, but falls in love with him anyway.

Not A Perfect Soldier | 93354 words

In a world where HYDRA was wiped out in the '40s, Steve is found by the Army rather than SHIELD. General Thaddeus Ross wants a perfectly obedient super-soldier at his command, and to that end, he sets out to break Steve to his will. As Steve struggles to come to terms with all he has lost, his life in captivity is only made bearable by the presence of another prisoner-- another super-soldier known only as "Soldat". Then the Avengers strike a deal with Ross to "borrow" him for missions, and Steve is faced with a team who dislikes him, an organization he doesn't trust, and the question of what he's willing to do to escape Ross's clutches.

For Want Of Him | 103174 words

It's the twenty-first century, and Steve Rogers has never been more alone. Everything he knew, everyone he loved, is now gone, and a dark, bitter loneliness claws at him, raking bleeding gashes into his heart. And then there's Brock Rumlow. Rumlow is like salt in his wounds; vicious, and cruel. But his dark brown hair and teasing smirk reminds Steve of someone long dead, and his New York accent sounds like home...He's a soldier like him...he understands. And Steve makes the fatal mistake of trusting him.

The Same Measure | 4943 words

The Winter Soldier was never allowed to stop unless an injury was too grievous.

To Be Unmade | 5114 words | Part 1 of Alexander Pierce Should Have Died Slower

For the asset, things only ever get worse. The external scars fade quickly enough. The internal ones dig deeper and deeper.

But the internal scars are called love, and doesn't that make them worth the hurt?

Do Not Put In The Icebox | 7143 words | Part 2 of Alexander Pierce Should Have Died Slower

When the asset malfunctions on a mission, Rumlow and Rollins learn more than they ever wanted to know about Pierce's hobbies.

And then everyone has pancakes.

The Knowing Makes It Worse | 4130 words | Part 3 of Alexander Pierce Should Have Died Slower

No is a bad word and invites punishment.

Or, Alexander Pierce is a very bad man who delights in manipulating and degrading the asset.

Love Is For Children | 5303 words | Part 4 of Alexander Pierce Should Have Died Slower

Bucky understands how the game works. He can't understand why it makes Steve cry.

But Natasha and the other Avengers are there to help.

I Just Wanted To Be Sure Of You | 4461 words | Part 5 of Alexander Pierce Should Have Died Slower

Bucky has Bucky Bear; it's only fair for Natasha to have something of her own.

Visiting a toy store wasn't strictly necessary, but if Tony wants to throw money around, no one's going to complain.

“Till The End Of The Line | 6069 words | Part 6 of Alexander Pierce Should Have Died Slower

It's hard to take a friendship right back up when so much has changed over seventy years.

Particularly when HYDRA's conditioning resurfaces.

*if you feel that any of these fics shouldn’t be in this list please just send me a message! :) I have read them all but over the past 1+ years so some of them I might not remember all the details of :)

[ironmandeficiency]

fuck you very much

pairing: javier peña / reader

word count: 988

summary: if you say “fuck you very much” fast enough, it sounds like you’re saying “thank you” instead of “fuck you”

a/n: i reread this fic of mine and had this idea for a sister fic based on smth my parents say so 🤷🏻‍♀️ also steve casually calls you “man” once & javi says “our girl” as a slight joke

you wish these meetings would start to bring good news. conversations with the ambassador are, more often than not, preludes to bad or worse news. criticizing how one operation went and giving unnecessary reminders to the importance of your job as if you’re not on the field before the sun rises and long after it sets. it’s chock-full of ridiculous bureaucracy and ego balancing under the guise of being polite guests in colombia and it drives you absolutely mad.

because you weren’t a man in a man-dominated field, you had a tighter noose on your neck. the slightest sway of the breeze, one wrong move could put your career (and sometimes, life) in jeopardy. you couldn’t lash out in anger without being seen as “psycho” or “too emotional.” if you took a page out of javier’s book and tried sleeping around to let out steam, any respect you’ve earned on the field through your hard work would be tarnished by your sex life.

it was hard for your first several months in colombia to not rip new ones in the many many people who disrespected you. one phone call home reminded you of a trick that a family friend used when piled down with the paperwork of people who couldn’t be bothered to do what was required of them. every time people would drop a thick stack on her desk, she would smile and give them a “fuck you very much” spoken fast enough to be misheard for a thank you.

at first you were hesitant to use this tactic at work. if you didn’t speak it fast enough or if the wrong person could truly understand you, it could result in disciplinary action that you didn’t have the patience to deal with. that would only give even more ample reason for you to need said trick.

then stechner visited.

everything about this man radiated shifty and skeevy. no matter how you tried, there was almost nothing (and you don’t say this lightly) redeemable or tolerable about that man. even his bald spot had the power to annoy you, which was a feat in itself. the only thing you could do was tough it out when you were around him and hope that if you didn’t have the patience, you’d have an untraceable gun.

today was one of those days where nearly everyone (but mostly stechner) rubbed you the wrong way and you were this close to tearing your hair out and screaming bloody murder in frustration and indignation. it all came to a head when you were called into ambassador noonan’s office and stechner was sitting there like the cat who ate the canary. you were too busy wondering what canary could he have eaten to warrant such a smug look to be fully paying attention to the ambassador’s scolding.

“are you even listening, agent?! the government pays you to listen to your superiors, yet here you stand…”

javier and steve open the door mid-scolding and your blood cools just enough to keep control over the hand itching to deck the cia agent not even trying to contain his amusement. “i hate to say this… peña, murphy,” messina sighs in resignation, wagging a finger between the men. “you two, reel this one in or all three of you face suspension. i’m not going to tolerate any more rogue agents running around colombia.”

everyone in the room knew that messina was desperate if she was asking steve and javi to reel you in. this desperation gave way to an awkward tension in the air felt by all but stechner, the douche. in spite of the awkwardness cloud, you were fuming at the audacity of messina for dragging you in front of stechner and your partners. your partners were truly expecting there to be smoke coming from your ears the longer they watched the scene unfold, bodies tense and ready to pounce in case they had to keep you from letting loose on the smug cia agent.

you took a deep breath. this was not the hill to die on, and you weren’t going to give stechner the pleasure of watching you go down in flames. instead, you spoke with a smile and saved your anger for a time when you wouldn’t lose your job for showing it. “well fuck you very much for your time. if there’s anything else i can do for you, please let me know.” and with that, you walked out without looking back.

it didn’t take a genius to know that your partners were following you out of the ambassador’s office. their footsteps echoed on the cheap tiled floor with the tact of a clumsy elephant. you didn’t grace them with your attention until you were slumped in your desk with a huff. “what is it, guys?”

“you literally just said ‘fuck you’ to the ambassador and didn’t get fired on the spot, man.” he scoffed as he sat and lit a cigarette. “you’re insane!”

okay, so someone caught on to it. as long as it wasn’t the ambassador, you still had a job. plus, it pleasantly surprised your boys which was a feat in itself, those two (sometimes) had hawk eyes and it’s typically hard to sneak something by them. on other occasions, you might as well ask a brick wall for help with how blind they could be.

javi laughed at the smug smile you wore at your accomplishment, knowing you were gonna ride this high for a while. “we shouldn’t expect anything less from our girl, stevie,” he replied with a wink. “now let’s get to work, we gotta make sure we keep her in line.”

all three of you laughed at that remark knowing full well that the three of you were waking chaos in blue jeans and badges. there was going to be no reining in getting done anytime soon, but that’s what made colombia a bit more tolerable.

javi taglist: @catsnkooks @senator-nahberries @majorshiraharu @stardustsunrisekisses @likeshootingstarsinthenightsky @darthadeline @max--phillips @themarcusmoreno @jedi-mando @obirain @battletales @greeneyedblondie44 @pedropasscals @princess76179 @kaermorons @hornystarwarsbisexual @lv7867 @whovianwar @purelypascal @andysficrecs @book-of-anarchy