#they aint got a crew name but whatever

[kentmac]

The Fall of Constantinople in the Style of Dave Attell (Part 3)

Alright folks, so we got this Mehmed dude coming in hot with his army, ready to attack the Theodosian Walls, the only thing standing between him and Constantinople. They set up camp outside the city, the day after Easter - must've needed a little break after all those chocolate eggs. Now, these Ottomans knew their stuff when it came to besieging cities. They had a whole system going on - burning corpses, getting rid of poop in a sanitary way, and making sure their water was clean. Gotta hand it to 'em, they were taking hygiene pretty seriously – or lack of it - considering they were about to wreck some walls. Thank good you can’t smell the old times though the funny stories in the history books.

So, Constantinople, also known as Istanbul, was like the toughest city in Europe back in the day. Mehmed, the dude leading the Ottoman Empire, sent some of his best troops to take out the remaining Byzantine strongholds outside the city. They managed to capture a couple of forts and even some islands, but they couldn't get past this chain blocking the entrance to the Golden Horn, which is like this harbor area. But then, Mehmed was like, "Nah, I'm gonna drag my ships over a frickin' hill and bypass that chain." So, they greased up some logs – get your mind out of the gutter - and pulled those ships up the hill. What do you know – lube makes everything better This move seriously messed with the flow of supplies for the defenders and pretty much killed their morale. The Byzantines tried to fight back with fire ships – that’s a ship that you set on fire for those not in the know. Apperently, you man them with crew, set them on fire and then the crew bails at some point. Don’t ask me I aint no general. But the Ottomans won out and the Byzantines who bailed from their sinking ships after they set them on fire got impaled on stakes when the reached the land because the Mehmed was right there to intercept them. In retaliation, the Byzantines executed their Ottoman prisoners in front of the Ottoman army. So yeah, it was getting pretty intense on those sea walls defending the Golden Horn.

Hey folks, so there were these Ottoman dudes trying to break through the walls of Constantinople, right? And they had these sapper guys, Serbian miners or whatever, sent by Zagan Pasha, trying to dig tunnels to get inside. But this German engineer named Johannes Grant, along with the Byzantine troops, they were like, oh hell no, and they dug counter-mines to kill those miners. It was a whole underground battle, man. They intercepted tunnels, destroyed 'em with Greek fire, and tortured some Turkish officers. Meanwhile, Mehmed, the Ottoman leader, sent an ambassador to the Emperor, offering to lift the siege if they just handed over the city. But our Emperor, Constantine XI, he wasn't about to give up without a fight, my friends. That's some real badassery right there.

Alright folks, here's the deal - it's 29th of May, and shit's about to go down in old Constantinople. The Ottomans are all fired up and mobilized for this final assault. They prayed and rested, because you know, gotta be well-rested before kicking some Byzantine ass. Meanwhile, the Venetian fleet was like, "Yo Emperor, ain't no big relief fleet comin'." So, tensions were high, and mass religious processions and ceremonies were happening all over the damn place. The Ottomans were blasting cannons left and right, shooting 5,000 shots using a shit ton of gunpowder. Then, just past midnight, it was game on. The Christian troops attacked first, followed by these azaps and Anatolian Turkmen dudes who aimed for the weak-ass 11th-century walls. They managed to breach it for a hot second, but the defenders were like, "Nah, not today." Finally, the elite Janissaries went all out and attacked the city walls. And in the chaos, the Genoese dude in charge of defense got seriously messed up, causing a good ol' panic among the defenders. Shit's escalating, people!

The Battle

So, there's this crazy battle, right? The Genoese troops are retreating, Constantine and his dudes are holding their ground against the Janissaries, but eventually, the Ottomans break through and all hell breaks loose. Greek soldiers run home to protect their families, Venetians retreat to their ships, and a few Genoese escape. Some guys surrender, some jump off the walls, and it's a straight-up massacre. The Ottomans take over the city, loot the houses, and behead some dudes. But hey, at least a few people manage to escape. It's chaos, bro.

Well folks, according to the fancy book, Mehmed II let his troops do some looting but tried to stop it from going too far. But let me tell ya, those sailors and marines went berserk, looting everything in sight. The city was in ruins, churches desecrated, houses destroyed, and stores emptied. Mehmed II was supposedly moved to tears, saying, "What a city we have given over to plunder and destruction." And let's not forget about the pillaging and atrocities. Thousands of Christians were killed or enslaved, nuns and innocent women were raped, and youths were forced into obscene acts. It was a bloodbath, folks. The Ottomans even captured children and stole treasures from the imperial palace. Resistance was futile - anyone who defied them was straight up slaughtered. It was a gruesome scene, piles of corpses everywhere you looked. Just goes to show the brutality of war, my friends.

So the Hagia Sophia got a makeover, huh? Knocked over an altar and put a muezzin up there to sound a prayer. Talk about a holy renovation! But hey, the Greek Orthodox Church still got to chill inside, so I guess that's cool. And this whole Ottoman millet system thing? Yeah, apparently that's just a myth. But anyway, back to the real drama - Constantinople fell, and Europe freaked out. Some were all for another Crusade, while others thought maybe talking it out could work. Pope Pius II was all like, "Let's grab our swords and go!" and this German dude was all like, "Nah, let's talk it out, bro." Meanwhile, poor Morea fortress held on, but eventually gave in. And poor Constantine XI didn't have an heir, so his brothers' kids became Ottoman favorites. One became Governor-General of the Balkans, and the other became an Admiral. Talk about a family affair! And now, with Constantinople under Ottoman control, it was like a punch in the gut for Christendom. But don't worry, the West kept dreaming of a Christian reconquest, fueled by rumors of Constantine XI's rescue from an angel. Oh, and the Pope called for a crusade, but no one really cared. So yeah, the age of crusading was pretty much over.

You know, back in the day, when Constantinople got sacked and fell like a ton of bricks in 1453, it triggered this massive migration of Byzantine scholars and all sorts of folks. We're talkin' grammarians, humanists, poets, writers, printers, the whole package. These guys brought with them a boatload of knowledge from Byzantine civilization - stuff that Western Europe hadn't seen before. And guess what? This whole shebang is considered by many fancy-pants scholars as the kickstart to the Renaissance. Yeah, that's right. The end of the Middle Ages, baby! It's like a whole new era started when these Greeks made their way to Italy. Authoritative source? Me, that’s who.

Now, there’s your bedtime reading folks. Sleep tight.

[theuniverseawakens347]

I can’t even big fat “samoian” nigga from Barry’s cleaning crew..lived in Hayward …took him home a couple times trying to “get out and explore” the next city I’m in WHILE ALREADY BROKE UP W “MY NIGGA” preston. HEATING ASS ( why would I be loyal to a disgusting dick ne where nigga when I FINALLY WOKE UP N SAW THE REAL OF HIS DICK EPADES) …I AINT gotta explain myself …a nigga KNOW HE WAS NEVER FAITHFUL.. 16 whatever but 19 you was talking bout just Doug n Sandra for some $$ n us..but steady pimping me out and making EXTRA MONEY FROM LEE OFF EACH KILL YOU GOT OVER ON ME 🖕🏾.. anyways Ron..Ronald…Ronnie whatever Hayward nigga name was 2 smashes …and Paul was talking and showing me around I AINT smash until Christmas party of Camille traylor ( who was growing weed in her apt at the time) NIGGAS DRUGGED ME I TOLD HIM IN THE CAR DRIVING BACK OVER THE BAY BRIDGE N THIS NIGGA SHRUGGED ME THEN RAPED ME ONCE WE GOT HOME …n I hit ‘em with a “yo shit…not it get out” how’s it rape cash?? BECAUSE I NEVER SAID WE WAS GUNA FUCK YOU NIGGA JUST BE THINKING THATS AUTOMATIC…a bitch WAS interested in talking to him and told him he cute …but I got A LOT OF BAGGAGE W MY PRESTON AND MY MOVING OUT THERE SITUTION,.,which HE offered letting me crash in his bed when we started smoking n hanging more 🤷🏽‍♀️ …then told me “imma marry you n have yo kids” we ain’t start talking until Halloween Barry’s party when I came as scary spice n Joseph UP N DOWN ME ONthe dance floor …a bitch WAS NOT DRUNK N I WENT HOME TO WHERE PRESTON N I WAS STAYING…PACKED MY SHIT AND MOVED IN W BECCA FROM BARRYS …Preston LEFT ME THAT WEEKEND WE WAS SUPPOSE TO GO TO LA TOGETHER BUT I WASNT SURE IF I WANTED TO BE AROUND HIM / LOSE THE OPPORTUNITY TO GET AWAY FROM AN ABUSIVE NIGGA LEFT EM LIKE I LEFT DANIEL. YOU FUCKS DESERVED THAT SHIT .cry to ya mamas 🖕🏾😌

[malcolmbrights-a]

@chastainwrites 

[neonain]

Title: What's worth the sea

Ship: Law x Reader

This can be Platonic or Romantic, Summarizing this One-shot is that: Law wants you in his crew

"Me? Join your crew?" You asked, letting go of the unconscious man you were holding

The man named Law infront of you only nodded, his sword on his shoulders. Your shoulders slumped down, the gang you beated up are unconscious so no need to be on gaurd really and the guy infront of you doesn't seem like his gonna do something

You hummed, Going on adventures seems fun but. . . ngeehh.

"Nah" you said with a poker face and stroded to the exit besides him " Pirating really aint my forté, but Im giving ya credit for tracking me down for 2 months. Give me something thats worth the sea then Ill reconsider your offer Mr. Trafalgar"

You exited the run down cabin and made your way to the town, the little girl right besides you. You patted her head and asked "Did they do anything to you sweetheart?"

"No" She shook her head, You hummed in relief, glad that they didnt do anything to a sweet girl

You really didn't notice the time but now you did, It's already dusk. You hummed once again and carried the girl on your shoulders making her squeak by the sudden action "This should be faster, Now where do you live kid?" You asked and walked down a steep hill

"I live in the bakery with my Papa" the girl answered, resting herself on your head

"Oh the Dela Rosa? Sweet! I should atleast get {pastry} as a reward aight kid?" You asked in excitement, You dont get to eat freshly made pastries everyday!

The girl laughed "okay!"

You continued your way down to the town while Chatting with the little girl about anything, Its really interesting her father was once a pirate but settled down as a baker after getting married with her mother

It was already night when you gave the sleepy girl to her father, They wanted you to stay and sleep for the night since you looked exhausted but you refused. So the father just gave you {pastry} as a thank you for saving his daughter. You can already see why the father couldn't fight the goons, since both his legs were gone, only sitting on a wheel chair

You bowed down and waved good bye, you walked through the empty town while eating the warm pastry. It was already midnight, The sound of the shore only filled the quite night

You sat down on a flat stone on the sand, munching down on the pastry. This is the greatest thing you have ever tasted, you cried inside

You hummed a little tune, bored out of your mind. You watched the little crabs fight on your feet, its really funny, You poked the little crabs with a stick not noticing the rustling of leaves behind you

Right then you got kicked out of your spot, You got rolled away a few feet from your seat. You groaned and sat up, massaging your back, Whatever kicked was powerful as fuck

You looked at the person- er- bear? grizzly bear- a bear- Right on your seat is a bear aggressively eating your {pastry}, it might be cute but geezus it seemed hungry, excuse the glowing eyes and floaty hair

You got closer, You noticed that it was actually a Polar Bear wearing an orange wear, the orange color turning brown because of the moon's hue

You sat down infront of it, the crabs gone long ago. You watched the bear eat your precious {pastry}, You would've hit it the moment it you got up but its too cute-

You sighed and watched the bear eat, Once the bag was empty its eyes returned to black and its hair settling down to be short. You mentally died, This bear is too cute-

"Im sorry" The bear apologized, its head down and it fiddled with its fingers and tears were threatened to fall

You panicked "No- NO- Its Okay! I was full a-anyways-" Lie- You was hungry- but seems like your appetite is gone lol

The bear wiped away his tears and sat there, his head still low. You couldnt help but blush and muffled down a squeal down your throat, This being is too cute

Wait- Did the bear just talk- You froze and coughed. "You can talk?" you asked, Crazy things sure are something

The bear nodded, you mentally squealed, How can something be this cute? You slapped yourself, No time to think about that

"If you can talk then do you have a name?" You asked

The bear nodded "Bepo"

You inhaled, You need the gods to slap some senses on to ya. "Okay Bepo, Can you tell me where you came from?" You asked again, you glanced at the shiny metal piece of the clothing, It looked very familiar

Bepo shook his head "Im lost"

You thought for a bit and sighed, You stood up "Alright Bepo, Let's go and take a look around the Island then, Maybe we'll find some of your friends if you have"

Bepo beamed up and walked besides you, silent but happy. You will die for him you thought, Damn his cute as hell His worth your life

You both walked first in the town looking for someone maybe looking for him, The town is wide, they walked around for an hour before they bumped onto two people wearing the same clothing except for the hats in the town exit

"Bepo!" Both men were relieved seeing their friend safe and sound, not that there were dangers around but because he went wild when the full moon appeared, thank goodness it was gone now

Bepo went to hug both the men, the duo groaned at the weight. Who could carry a polar bear? Their Captain apparently

Penguin looked at you and bowed down "Thank you for taking care of our friend!"

"Nah Nah its fine, Im also thankful that He made me do something for awhile" You chuckled and waved the three men good bye, Though they left you a small bag of Berries as thanks

You walked away whistling, you entered the barn and climbed up the second story. You sighed in exhaustion, laying down on top of the hey covered in wool. Its kind of the owner to let you sleep in here

You gazed at the stars above the window, The three men had the same token on their clothes. It bothered you, The token is familiar. You dont know where you have seen itA before, you groaned in annoyance and just went to sleep. Not forgetting to close the window above

•°•°•°•°•

You woke up with a sneeze, Sleeping in a barn really isnt great but its comfortable. You stretched and exited the barn, and walked your way on the busy road while softly singing

"Breakfast~ Time for Breakfast~"

You entered the small restaurant and ordered your food.

You sat down on the corner table of the restaurant and ate happily.

There werent much people in the room, so it gave off a calming atmosphere

You drank down on your {beverage} and ate your food. Right when you finished it, the man from before sat down

You deadpanned "What is it Trafalgar?"

"Of course I brought you that is worth the sea or should I say your life" He chuckled, right then Bepo appeared besides him with a little hi

You froze, "Oh you fucking Bitch" you said and smirked, so that's why the token was familiar

"So your officially part of my crew {Name}, I heard from Bepo that his worth your life no¿" He said and tossed you the token, You almost blushed in embarrassment. Looks like you thought about it out loud

"Lady Faith chose the way, I ain't no savage turning this down now" You chuckled down your embarrassment and complimented at the token on your hand "Your Jolly Roger sure is unique"

"Well then, Its a pleasure being in your crew, Captain"

[roughentumble]

Tagged by @hale-of-stiles-heart

Name: shawn

Sign: cancer the crabbbbb pinchpinch

Height: 5'3

Current time: after 0100

Favorite band/musical artists: im indecisive as hell, i cant pick favorites lol. as a kid i liked paramore, three days grace, system of a down... i also like more indie stuff, like penelope scott, and music to cry to(leonard cohen comes to mind). oh and j-pop too, kanon wakeshima, utada hikaru, ikimonogakari, the usual crew. kyary pamyu pamyu but i havent heard anything abt her in ages, i guess she fell out of popularity. ninjari bang bang still slaps tho. ummmm. other stuff. i have a whole music tag to give you an idea of what i listen to!

Last Movie: i watched SOMETHING the other day but honestly i cant remember what it was(which does not bode well for thing in question) so let's just say Nope.

Last Show: i think its called requiem? it was a netflix/bbc limited series, 6 episodes. it was pretty decent, tho i maintain the spooky creatures were NOT ANGELS they were FAIRIES, it makes way more sense if theyre fairies.

Blog created: mmmmm a while ago. 2012? maybe younger idk. i remade at one point so we'll never know the exact year

What I post: memes, whatever random rambling bullshit that crosses my mind, gay people, fandom stuff, geraskier

Last Google search: . literally "". i thought it was an incorrectly displaying emoji and thought emojidex would pop up with an actual image

Other blogs: is secret shhhh 🤫 ;)

Do you get asks: i been known to, ye! got a nice anon or two floatin around.

Following: 867

Followers: 998

Sleep schedule: aint got one, i like stayin up late tho

Do you play instruments? currently? nah. but over my lifetime i've done guitar, ukulele, ocarina.... probably some piano as a wee babe... i think like violin or something..... oh and obviously recorder lol xp

Currently wearing: soft pants an soft shirt. for sleepy times

Dream job: its changed so many times over the years i dont even know at this point. i guess the true dream is just getting one super major ultra best seller of some kind and coating off the money for the rest of All Time

Dream trip: idk, lots of places would be fun to go, but im going to ireland next year and hopefully that'll be really cool! and i always wanted to go to japan as a kid, so maybe like the ghibli museum would be cool

Nationality: US.

Favorite song: seconding amber here, i could never pick a fav.

Last book: i mean im currently reading samuel butler's translation of the iliad

idk who to tag so i shan't. lol

[ask-jokeboi]

The Party

Hope everyone's having a great holiday season so far! This time of year isn't always easy but thankfully friends and a good distraction can make things easier. 

I drew these pic’s to pair with a moderately long fic I wrote to follow up the aforementioned party from earlier, it’s below the the cut! Read it if you want! Either way, Happy Holidays! 💜💚💛

Words: 4,142    Relationships: Harlivy /Harley & Joker friendship / Batjokes (mentioned)     Universe: Mine / Lego Batman

A/N: sorry for any typos or weird grammatical stuff, I'm good at art, not writing

Summary: Joker’s felt a little down since Batman’s been out of town, will his best friend Harley be able to cheer him up?

Warnings: Alcohol use, implied depression

_____________________

"C'mon Jay it'll be be fun!" Cheered Harley, mustering all the enthusiasm she could in an attempt to persuade Gotham's former clown prince of crime to pull himself together 

"I don't care!…. Go bother your girlfriend or something. Leave me alone…" He was currently piled under several layers of blankets, sunk deep into the ball pit he called a bed

"Nuh uh, I'm not haulin' my butt outta this room 'till you haul yours. You can stay in that pit and cry all ya like, but it won't fix nothin', you gott-"

"I don't GOTTA do anything!" Jay snapped. Throwing his blanket aside and revealing his less than kempt appearance, his face twisted into a frustrated glare

Harley, already familiar with Jay's usual harmless outbursts only sighed as she looked her long time friend up and down, taking in his surroundings with a curious eye

It'd been a month or two since Batman left the scene and his absence was definitely beginning to take a toll on the poor clown.

She could tell it'd been a while since he'd done anything to care for himself…. His hair, which was usually swept back into a flawless green pomp, lazily draped his face. The dull forest black of his roots beginning to seep back into the rest of it. Same could be said for the state his room which, due to his erratic nature, was always a bit untidy  but had recently fallen into a state of near disrepair. Bags of half eaten junk food and empty bottles of all sorts of things lay strewn across the floor, particularly around his half deflated bed.

Despite the mess, he still seemed a little...thin… more so than usual to be honest… his ribs visible beneath the loose shirt he wore, arms comparable to sticks despite the muscle.

most of all though, he just seemed... tired. Jay always looked tired out of makeup. It was one of the first things she'd managed to take note of when he'd first entered her office years ago…. But right now the purple rings beneath his eyes that never seemed to go away were deepened to a point that made it clear he wasn't getting much sleep or doing much for himself in general...

Seeing her best friend in a state like this was hard to witness… and although her partner, Ivy, didn't have much but mild disdain for Jay, Harley couldn't find it in herself to leave him like this… which is why she thought a party might lift his spirits a little 

"C'mooon! You love parties!! It'll just be a small one anyway!" It was actually much bigger than she was implying but Jay liked big and she didn't wanna scare him off too soon… 

"Yeah, like that'll make things any better… who did you even invite?? A good half of the rogues don't even like me…"

"Sure they do!"

Jay only looked at her, bereft and unimpressed. 

"I mean ok you and Riddler don't always get along and it took a lot a beggin' ta get ya un-banned from the iceberg lounge but still!!"

"Uhg whatever! It doesn't matter! I don't need those bozos seein' me like this anyway..."

"Like what?" 

"I don't know!  I'm just…... I'm not in the right… mood for something like that right now.... You know how this works… they'd see right through me. "

Back when Jay was still her patient they'd end up talking a lot about masks…Batman's would come up more often than not but every now and then he'd end up discussing his own…. Or more specifically, the metaphorical one he'd put on every time he picked up a brush and painted himself a new face…..

"Jay, sweetie…  you don't have to pretend to be okay… they won't think you're weak or nothin', you know that right?..."

Jay gave her an incredibly tired look before turning away.

"What happened to the Jay that wasn't afraid to let people know how he's feelin' huh? The one that turned every emotion into a show….?"

He kept his head down, shoulders stiff, before speaking...

"....Cause I'm not just sad this time…. " As he looked up slowly an emotion that was rarely seen on the mans face showed itself, flooding his eyes. 

"W- when I'd talked to Robin and Batgirl that last time and asked about Batman they gave each other this look and…. Something's wrong… he's in trouble or something I… I can feel it…..  W-what if he doesn't come back and he leaves me here all alone an-" 

Harley put a polished nail up to Jay's lips and smiled warmly.

"Shhhh…. You're worryin' too much puds… ur big dumb brain is just an overdramatic liar… don't listen to it okay?" 

Jay sniffled, giving her an understanding nod.

"You still got me an' your crew an' Bud and all the other little silly things that make ya days good doncha?"

He smiles halfheartedly. "Y-yeah…. But still… he was..."

"I know… he's special….but do you seriously think anything out there could actually kill Batman? THE Batman? C'mon now….  He's luckier than any bastard out there and you know it…"

"Yeah…. Yeah I guess ur right"

"Of COURSE I'm right!… now come on…" she offers her hand and helps her friend stand up. "Let's get that hair done and those nails shined up  so you're brain can take a break from making all those nasty thoughts" 

Jay smiled a little wider this time, forever grateful he had a friend as great as Harley around… he really didn't know what he'd do without her sometimes...

"Right…. Also… uh…. Harley?"

"Yeah?"

"Thanks for….uh…. Bein'... around… I guess…" Jay practically mumbled...

Harley smiled knowingly, amused with his poor attempt of gratitude

"No problem, Pud's….." she gave him a peck on the forehead leaving a black smudge behind 

"now enough mush...Let's clean this mess and get ya fabbed up"

________________

A few hours later, Jay stood outside the titular iceberg lounge in his best winter fit, a long boa around his shoulders and a pair of unnecessary sunglasses obscuring the mascara he'd only half ruined on the way there…. 

He truly, honestly, did not feel like socializing with anyone at the moment, but who was he to refuse a doctor's orders?....

Taking a deep breath of the cold winter air, Jay stiffened up, smoothed the wrinkles from his vintage memphis style sweater and entered the lounge, heels high and head high as he could manage 

____________

When the doors swung open with a swirl of winter snow, Jay was greeted by a surprisingly full and stunningly silent room. Christmas music cut through the tension like a knife as everyone stopped what they were doing and turned their attention to Joker's fashionably late arrival.

He didn't know if it was because of his natural ability to demand attention or the fact that he hadn't been seen in nearly 3 weeks, but for some reason the room seemed slightly on edge. worried he'd come with another Joker brand surprise perhaps. Thankfully, Harley, who'd left his place a little earlier to get everything ready, noticed who'd finally arrived.

"JJ!! YOU MADE IT!!" she leaped off her stool and came running to grab him, The rest of the room taking it as a cue to un-tense and to go back to their festivities, the lounge lighting up  with warm greetings and laughter.

" Hey…" said Jay as Harley put an arm around his shoulder and escorted him to the booth she was sitting at….  

"So… is all of this for me or…?"

"No, did she tell you that?" Ivy who was sitting at the booth with his other less than fond acquaintance, Catwoman and someone else he didn't seem to recognize, gave a snide smile, Jay suddenly felt he should probably sit someplace else

"IVY!! SHHH" Harley shushed

"What? He was gonna find out out eventually…. It was supposed to be Penguin's annual winter ball" 

"Uh,It still is tho…?" said Kat, mouth full of shrimp 

"Well, yah…. Difference is we had to 'finesse' Penguin into letting HIM in" Ivy explained, disdain in her voice

"And you... helped with that?..." asked Jay, surprised. Ivy sighed

"for Harley's sake, yes. not yours" 

Jay smiled, amused. "well how charitable of you, here's to hoping you won't regret it"

Ivy rolled her eyes. "As if I don't already" she said, taking a short sip from her drink, Harley sitting down next to her give her thank u peck on the cheek.

"Hey, why'd you get banned from this dump anyway?" Asked Kat, eyes squinting curiously 

"I have no idea…." Jay shrugged 

"He put a coke and mento bomb in the fountain!" Harley interrupted 

"Oh yeah…." He'd totally forgot

"Ha! Awesome…" 

"Right uh, anyway, who the hell are you?" Jays attention suddenly turned to the woman sitting opposite of kat. She had light blue skin, bright white eyes and hair that made her look like a human lighting rod.

"Name's Livewire." She said, voice sharp as her appearance 

"She's from Metropolis" explained Ivy. Jay rose a brow.

"Metropolis huh?? How'dya like dealin' with boy scout full time over there?" He quizzed 

"Sweet!…" she exclaimed enthusiastically "Big blue aint got a thing on me! 'sides, dweeb's been outta town for months now! metropolis might as well be my personal playground"

The mentioning of Superman's absence made something in Jay's chest twist. He'd known their neighbor hero had been MIA for even longer than Batman, Supergirl taking over the workload just like Batgirl had in Gotham. but still… the reminder was enough to worry him. I mean… if superman was taking so much time up there, what chance did Batman have against whatever it was they were so busy with??

Trying his best to shake off the uneasiness building in his stomach Jay took a breath and snapped back to reality, offering Livewire his hand

"Well, uh... Livewire, i'm this city's head honcho while the bat's gone so welcome to Gotham and try not to wear it out" 

Harley and Ivy exchanged looks as Jay smiled slyly and took Livewires hand…

...Only for his usual gesture of hospitality to be met with an equally shocking grip that sent blue sparks flying in every direction.

"DAMN, what the- !! " Jay yanked his hand back and held it in pain, hot needles running up his arm.The new addition to Harley's crew laughed crudely and smiled

 "why do you think they call me 'LIVEWIRE' genius?" 

Jay stayed silent with defeat as the table went up in hysterics "Yeah fine, okay, I shoulda saw that one coming" he sighed and smoothed out his hair which had sprung up to stand on end, his face ever so slightly red "anyway, you ladies have a nice time… i'll set up shop somewhere else and let you guys… idk… flirt with each other or whatever..." without much fanfare he slunk off to sit someplace else.

After the table had settled down completely though, Harley noticed Jay making his way to the bar looking somewhat dejected.

"Aw Jay…." 

The rest curiously turned their attention to the direction of Harley's gaze.

"You're not going after him are you?" Asked Ivy after a beat.

"Well… yeah…?" Harley shrugged.

"Uhm, why?" Asked kat, dipping more shrimp into her cocktail "like if he's not in the mood for a joke that's kinda his problem…?"

"Yeah, but still…. I've never seen 'im like this for so long…. He's usually so funny and animated, it's like somethin' drained all the life out of 'im…." The concern on Harley's face was very apparent. Ivy brushed back a few strands of her hair and tried her best to reassure her.

"Look i'm sure he'll get his second wind when Batman comes back at some point… but ‘til then it's not your job to take care of him…" 

Harley sighed silently. "I know but… he's still my best friend… and if I hadn't met him, I wouldn'ta met you!" She squished close to her spouse with a smile, Ivy suddenly unable to hold back a small one herself.

"He helped me outta my slump all those years ago, least I can do is help 'im outta his..."

Ivy gave her a soft look before reluctantly caving "Kindness has always been your best and worst trait, silly bee…" she said with a smirk "fine, go ahead and do your thing, I've got plenty of company over here in the meantime…"

Harley smiled happily and gave her one last kiss before running off to join Jay at the bar.

____________

Jay sat alone at the bar in silence until he was suddenly startled by Harley's arrival.

 "What's shakin' grumpy gills?" She asked pulling up a stool.

Jay didn't answer as the bartender slid over a funfetti martini topped with the works, Jay lazily catching it and drinking deeply.

"Those guys didn't get ta ya did they? I know they seem mean bu- "

"Ah… I don't care about them…" said Jay dismissively  "we're all villains here right? I'm sure they got their reasons… sides, Livewire's pretty fun even if she did fry my Joy buzzer" He said regretfully…

"So what's up then…?" Asked Harley, head tilted 

Jay looked down at the table with a frown, fingers anxiously scraping the side of the glass in his hand….

"What she'd said about metropolis…. And… superman…."

"Oh…"  Harley nodded "well…. I'm sure they're together wherever they are…. Right? Him and Batman? And I mean, with Superman around, he's bound to be okay….." 

Jay had a hard time matching her enthusiasm but that logic did comfort him some. "Yeah… yeah I guess so"

"C'mon Jay, you gotta get that stuff off your mind for a minute! Go mingle! Go dance!… look at everyone who came this time! Turn-out's never been so big!"

As Jay's looked around the room, Harley did have a point, usually these get-togethers only managed to scrounge up about half the gang, but it looked like almost all the rogues in town had come this time. Even D-listers like Polkadot man, Killer Moth, Crazy Quilt ect. Had managed to show up, plus people he didn't seem to recognize…

For example at the bar sat Scarecrow and a… Oddly scruffy looking man he looked to be sharing a drink with. He'd heard from Riddler over the phone some time ago that crow had found himself a friend and that the two were "in cahoots".  whatever that was supposed to mean. He supposed that must've been the "friend" in question…

A few tables down sat another unfamiliar  in a polkadot shirt and a pair of cracked thick lensed glasses. He had a peculiar looking puppet sitting on his lap which made J raise a brow, but he didn't judge. Looking at his woefully nervous face he guessed it must it must've been a security thing anyway… 

Despite the big crowd though, Jay did notice one person missing of whom he hadn't seen in quite a while...

"Yeah I guess everyone is here...  except uh, Lex I guess…?" Jay considered himself friends with metropolises king of corruption, even if the feeling wasn't always mutual. Seeing so many crooks he knew in one place made him realize how rare it was to see the mal hearted mogul at these things.

Unfortunately, Harley could only shrug with defeat. "Ah I tried to get Lex but you know how he is… nobody's seen that shut in for ages".

Jay's eyes narrowed at that "How long is ages…. ?" He pressed

"I dunno… a few months guess???  Livewire said he's been quiet lately, probably off in one of his labs making some over convoluted instrument of destruction I guess"

The growing list of missing big shots was beginning to piece something together in Jay's head… what on earth was Lex up to? Where was superman?? Why did the league need Batman's help? How did it all connect?? After a moment Harley noticed Jay slipping into his thoughts again and shook his shoulder lightly to pull him out of it.

"Hey, don't worry about that egghead. he'd only kill the mood if he were here anyway" 

Jay couldn't disagree, the billionaire was kind of notorious for being a giant stick in the mud.

"If you're really worried about what's goin' on with those guys, you can come up with a plan Tomorrow…. right now we got a' open dance floor, unlimited drinks and a Karaoke competition that's about ta kick off in ten"

The word 'Karaoke' was enough to snap Jay back to reality. "Did you say Karaoke?" 

"Yes, I did."

"Do they hav-"

"Yes, they have Queen" 

Jay nearly looked as if someone had told him the best news of his life. "Oh thank god" maybe Harley was right. Worrying would have to wait. 

_____________

The rest of the night went on with few hang ups. Drinks poured, music played and poorly screeched lyrics kept the mood upbeat.

The Karaoke stage hosted performance after performance, some more enthusiastic than others. Some painful, others surprisingly pleasant. Jay's teetered off the edge of both categories, but when "somebody to love" burst through those speakers, he'd sung it with his whole chest. The best performance by a long shot though had to be Ivy's who's affinity for 50's ballads lent to her beautifully rich voice and her's was closely followed by the Dent's who'd decided to attempt a duet with no chorus which everyone found somewhat impressive.

Emotions did flare up once or twice though, as they tend to do when it comes to villain gatherings. Ed and Jay got into a fight about something stupid and unimportant, both obviously enjoying themselves, Bane and Croc engaged in an arm wrestle that woefully ended in a tie, and Jay inevitably got worked up about Batman again, this time with a crowd of eager listeners somewhat entertained by his rambling, giving questionable advice here and there.

At the get-together's height, the dance floor had filled to the point where Penguin was just about ready to call the whole event off until Riddler dragged him on to the floor himself.

After another hour or so the party wound down some more and the night devolved into quiet discussions between friends, everyone either ready to leave or half asleep. Eventually Jay and Two-face of all people were left alone. Once Ed, Crow, Hatter and the rest had gone home.

Jay always liked Harv, for someone known for his temper he seemed to have a lot of patience and Jay found both of his selves uniquely interesting in their own ways. Harvey the "handsome" one was always very nice, easily flustered, and had a sadness in his eyes that was hard to ignore. "Dent", the one famous for all those 2 themed crimes, was a bold individual and one of the most brutally honest people he knew. That night though, even he seemed a little sad. He admitted later that it was because it'd been a while since he'd gotten to talk to his old pal Bruce, someone Jay was mildly familiar with of course, and they spent the rest of the night discussing Batman and wayne and how they seemed so similar until it really was time to head home. 

 sometime after midnight, long after everyone had either left or found someplace to pass out, Harley broke up with her girl gang again to come get Jay who'd fallen asleep in an empty booth.

"Wake up clown" she said loudly, nudging him a bit. Jay giggled quietly in response, turning over after a moment and opening his eyes.

"Oohh what's up??"

"Time to go." 

"Aw…" Jay huffed disappointedly, then did his best to sit up straight, his head slowly spinning as he did so "ah jeeze…"

"Don't worry I called one of your guys, he's waiting outside." She explained "I dragged you here, might as well drag you home" 

"You did that for me?" Jay smiled "That's so nice…."

"Mhm" carefully, she took his hand got him to his feet, doing her best to keep him up straight. As they headed out they met up with Ivy at the door

"Taking pennywise home?" She asked 

"It'll only take a minute" Harley assured 

"Alright… don't take too long…" she turned to leave but before she could, Jay suddenly spoke up.

"H-hey, Wait!" 

Ivy turned around, brow raised "You have something to say to me?"

"Uh… yeah? I mean… sort of? I just, uh… wanted to say i'm sorry for…  messing up your garden all those times…." 

Ivy blinked "Why are you telling me this now?"

"I just thought you shud kno….  And that um…. Maybe you'd hate me…. A little less... if I said sorry for once..." the frown on Jays face was absolutely pitiful, Ivy could only roll her eyes.

"I don't hate you… Joker"

"Oh?"

"I just think you're annoying…."

"Oh…." Jay couldn't really tell if that was any better but at the moment he was too drunk to care. "Okay…"

With that ivy turned around to join Kat and Livewire

"Thanks for the apology though I suppose…Take care of yourself…. And, Harley don't take too long… it's only 1:00am we still have plans."

"Don't worry Ive's  i'll catch up." 

after one last look, Ivy went back on her way and Harley continued walking J to his car.

As they went Jay hummed to himself, swaying slightly, until a certain thought made him go quiet again.

"....Harley….?" He asked suddenly.

"Yeah, J?"

"Am I a bad friend?" The question just as out of the blue as his apology to Ivy…. 

Harley looked at him, concerned "Why do ya ask?"

"I just…. Please?" He pleaded. Harley hesitated for a long moment but decided being honest was probably best.

" not exactly but… maybe sometimes"

"Hm…" Jay decided he'd have to work on that

"But I also know ya don't really wanna hurt anybody…. That you try your best everyday ta make people happy and that you've been through just as much any of us….  A few mean comments an' dumb pranks ain't gonna make anybody think you're the devil or somethin'….not me or any of the other guys... "

Jay had to smile at that, Harley always had something smart or nice to say no matter what. still, her answer only made him feel worse about how he'd been earlier when she was just trying to help… he really, honestly, didn't deserve her…. But the least he could do was let her know he was glad to have her...

"Harley…?"

"Yeah, J…"

"Thanks for being really, really great all the time… and… y'know… around… " Harley smiled as she secured his arm around her shoulders. 

"Thanks J..." 

"also sorry for sucking sometimes..."

She sighed. "It's fine Jay…."

carefully, she hauled his ragdolling body a few more feet and shoved him into the back seat of his car. J grunting as his head hit the leather seat.

"Now go home an' try not to get lost on your way to the door" She said sternly. Jay gave her a lazy wink and a pair of wobbly finger guns.

"Gotcha." 

with that,Harley slammed the door shut and the J-Mobile's engine roared to life. One his lackeys sitting in the driver's seat.

"Where to boss? HQ?"

"Yup… ah, sorry t' call ya out so late…"

"S'alright boss…. Don't worry about it"

As the car lurched forward, street lights shining in through the windows as snow fell ever so lightly over Gotham like a dusting of fresh powdered sugar, Jay did inevitably start thinking about Batman again, wondering when he'd come back, desperately wishing he knew anything about where he was right now….

The thoughts were hard to ignore and when he got home he knew he'd be surrounded by the same walls he'd spent the last month trapped with them in….  even so, the world felt a little less washed out than it had before he left, and it wasn't just because of the alcohol swirling in his blood. 

He may not have had Batman... But today reminded him he wasn't alone.

He had friends… real friends… In a way he'd always considered them such… but deep down there was always doubt. I mean sure he got along better with some than others, but after knowing people so long he shouldn't have been so dumb to think they hated him as much as he thought they did. 

When you're a villain in Gotham sometimes all you have are other weirdos in the same boat as you to help keep you and everyone else afloat. People need people in more ways than one…  and as Jay drifted off to sleep in the back of his gaudy getaway vehicle, laying in a position that was just barely comfortable, he pushed his worries aside and made sure that was something he'd never let himself forget.

~ End ~

[cthomashoodstory]

Best Years but Not in the Same Way (21)

Calum Hood x Reader

Previous Part

I don’t have any knowledge about anything i mention on this story i just search on google. And I’m sorry for my very bad english.

Masterlist

-

Calum Hood’s POV

I opened up Saara’s hotel room with extra keycard i got from the receptionist. As usual, it’s 2 A.M and I can’t sleep because i was too happy. Right after the show ends at Meadow Brook Amphitheater on Rochester Hill, Michigan, Saara and i kisses. Not a passion one, but it was a special moment with us. I know she still not ready to start a relationship or even labeled our relationship, but i was so happy, I’m such the happiest person on earth. We were on backstage room, just two of us, since my band mates are leaving early. We were talking casually about the show, the next thing happened we kissed. Damn, i really cursed Bieber for what happened to her.

I saw her sitting on the balcony floor, smoking, and talking with someone on the phone and she did it on speaker. The door was almost shut but i could hear every words she said. She hadn’t change her clothes since the show.

(Pictures as reference)

“Hahaha… what do you mean by that? You literally gave me that clothes because you care about me.” She laughed when she said it.

“Whatever you said, Palvin.” Oh she’s talking to Mike Posner. “How was the show? Did you enjoy it? How’s your feeling now?” He asked her and he really cared about her. He was the one who asked us and the manager to add Saara as special guest on our tour. He really fought so she could have a better life. He was the person who took care of her when she was new to this industry and he provided her place until she could earned her own money.

I leaned on the wall near the door, standing here quietly eavesdropped their conversation.

“The show went great. I really love the vibe of people singing and jumping to the songs. I really enjoyed it. Thanks Mike. Thanks for always caring me, you always found a way to make me happy.” She burned another cigarette. “I think i have to tell you this. It’s about me and Calum.”

The way she mentioned my name make me shivers and nervous at the same time.

“What about you and him? Somethings happened? Are you guys dating? Or you guys fight? What?” He sounded so curious so was i.

She slightly smiled and i can see it even from afar. “So… after the show, which is two hours ago, we were talking about the show, and we sat together at the couch, we were so so close, and we kissed.”

“You what?” He shouted so loud and i almost laughed because his reaction was hilarious even i only listen to his voice. “Oh my… Saara… finally! After those years you and finally kissed.”

“Yeah finally. Actually this wasn’t our first kissed.” I smiled brightly when she said it. It means that she really loves me and take me seriously. And Mike was so shocked when Saara said that. “I think… we did it four times… please don’t freak out.”

“That’s a lot, Miss B.” He yelled. “But seriously, with amount of that you two been kissing, why haven’t you guys dated already? You love him and he loves you. He’s ready, Saar. I swear to God, I’m shipping you two since 2013, you know that? Even I’m friends with your ex, i always wanted you two ended up together and maybe this time is the time.”

Saara sighed. “Yes, i love him. I’m in love with him and i want to start a real relationship with him, but not now. I need more time to heal my feeling and i think the progress is 80 percent… i need to make sure that I’m 100 percent heal. And i really can’t wait for that moment to happen.”

Hearing what Saara said, i felt more confident because, us being a couple will be happened anytime soon.

-

You were at the venue at York Fair in York, Pennsylvania for the next show. It’s 8 PM and The Aces was performing as opening act. You were sitting on the backstage room with the band and some of crews. They were ready to go to the stage because The Aces is almost finished performing. You were standing beside Calum and he was holding his bass. He smiled at you and you smiled back to him.

You felt something strange since afternoon when the band was did rehearsal and sound check. Like the crew slightly looked at me pity. Like something was happening and you didn’t know what was it. His smile was pure but you knew he hid something from you, but you were too scared to know the truth. So you were just smiled and played along.

You never looked at your phone whenever the band went on the stage. But today, for today only, you really wanted to see your phone and checked something because your feeling sensing something suspicious.

And you finally checked your phone while you were standing beside Calum. You saw everything and you got nothing. Until you saw someone tagged you on Instagram.

What? What did you just saw? He’s married?

“Hey what happened?” Calum asked you and you startled.

You shook your head and really tried to held your tears.

“Lets go.” The crew implied the band to walk on stage.

And then Calum waved. “See you in an hour.” You smiled and he disappeared.

And now you were sitting on a couch alongside with some crews that you didn’t know. You keep your mind busy with playing games, listen to music, play guitar, or anything you could. But that picture is still lingers in your head and you couldn’t get rid of it.

After an hour, the crew told you to get ready because they just finished The Only Reason song and they singing Lie To Me now. You could hear Luke is playing his piano while talking to the audience. Today you just got a worse news and now you have to sing this damn song that you wrote for your ex at the day he got married? Amazing. You stood up at the corner of the stage waiting for your turned and you really tried to not to cry.

“I know that you don’t but if i ask you if you love me i hope you lie lie lie lie lie to me. You sound so beautiful out there lets give it out to Saara Palvin everyone.” The audience were yelling and you started to sing the second verse, your own verse.

“It’s three am and the moonlights testing me,oh oh,” you glanced at Calum and he smiled but seconds after he saw your expressions, he looked worried. “I know that you’ve been holding on to someone else and now i can’t sleep.”

Your tears slowly falling down and you wiped it before anyone could notice. “I aint happy… i aint too happy.” Your voice is cracking and you’re so ready to cry but you still holding it.

“Flashing back to ne-“ you couldn’t hold it so you cried and the mic fell off from your grip and Calum immediately hugged you and the rest of the band stop the song.

“Let’s go to backstage okay Bar.” He lead you back to backstage leaving his bass on the ground and the band. You knew they were also shocked but you knew they knew the reason what happened to you. You couldn’t think and just crying on Calum’s arm.

He guided you to sat on the couch and you keep sobbing. “Hey, Bar? Baby please stop crying I couldn’t see you like this.” He held your hand and you stop crying.

“Please get back to the stage,” you said it stammered. “The band needs you, your fans need you. I will be okay here. Don’t worry.” You gave him smile as best as you could.

He nodded and left you alone at this backstage room. Right after he left, you started to cry again. But why you have to cry? What is the reason you have to cry?

You called Mike immediately.

“Hey Miss Hood.” He answered your call happily.

“You knew what happened? Please don’t lie.” You told him with a tone.

He sighed. “Yes, and i told your friends for not bragging that things up to you. I don’t want it to ruin your performance.”

You laughed and cried at the same time. “And now i was the one who ruined my performance.” You cried again. “Mike, tell me why I’m crying right now? Please tell me why.”

There was no answer from him.

“Please help me Mike. I am moving on from him. I am happy with my life right now, but why I’m crying right now? Why? I’m not jealous that he’s married. I don’t care about him. Well i guess i still care? I guess deep down inside I’m hurt the way he’s happy with someone else and not me? I should’ve get back to him long time ago before he’s dating someone else right? But instead I’m sticking up with Calum, the one who always there for me. He maked me happy. Calum makes me happy, right? I’m not suicidal anymore, I’m not stressed around my friends. He’s the one that i need. And i don’t have to cry for a stupid thing.” Now you asked and answered by yourself. And now you walked to the bathroom and looked in the mirror and how messed your face was.

You wiped your face with wet tissues and put the phone on speaker. “Tell me jokes or whatever because I’m doing my make up right now.”

“Did you remember when the first time we met at the restaurant you held a drink and almost spill it on my clothes?” He laughed when he told you the story and you laughed alongside with him.

“No. No you’re the one who bumped into me. God if i never apologized to you, which I wouldn’t do it at the first place, i would never be here.”

You both laughed. 30 minutes later you finished your make up and you hung up the call.

And now you didn’t know what to do and you just sitting on the couch playing some music. You felt better now actually after you pulled out your heavy thought and cried it out. And now you’re tired and about to shut your eyes when the door slammed opened and you saw Calum rushing to you.

“Bar you okay?” He was so worried when he asked you and you saw the rest of the band walked in to the room.

You smiled brightly. “Of course.” You hugged him. “Thank you for always keeping me safe.”

-

To be continued

Next Part

[second-chance-stray]

(Split Ends) RP Log: Rising and Riylli help Baldur while Cravs is MIA

Days prior ----- Cravs is gone, but has left two letters for Rising, Riylli, and Lin to read over.

Mindred's letter To the party of Singing Gull: Thank you for reaching out - I will consider extending a loan to your cause. Please meet me at the office of Red Spice Emporium on Windsday at 5:30 pm sharp. Baldur will be waiting by the entrance of the Hawker’s Alley to escort you all to the designated meeting area. I look forward to speaking with you all. ~Mindred R.

Crav's letter Shit happened. Busy. I’ll meet up with you guys on the day we have to see Mindred.

Day of -----

Cravendy Hound - The two of you arrive right on time, but Cravs is nowhere to be seen. Baldur (B) is there to greet you at the entrance of the Hawker’s Alley. The boy gives each of you a casual nod, and then looks around. “Where's your third?”

(Riylli Aliapoh) Riylli tilts her head as she approaches the boy. "...Is Cr... Singing Gull not here yet..?" She asks, looking around nervously. "She left us a super vague note. Hope she's alright..."

(Rising Lotus) grunted, looking just as anxious about the matter as Riylli if not more so. "She'd said she'd meet us here, so she'll probably be here soon." She gave a nod, trying to hide the slightest bit of doubt in her voice.

(Cravendy Hound) Baldur shakes his head no. “Been keeping an eye on the crowd while I waited. Thought you’d arrive all together.” He looks around himself, similarly anxious, then sighs. “We’ve got a few minutes to spare, but we shouldn’t keep Miss Rot waiting long. You said she left you a note?”

(Riylli Aliapoh) Riylli put her hands on her hips and gave a huff. "Barely. Just said she was busy and she'd meet us here. Should... we go see Rot without her..?" She asked, looking up at Rising

(Rising Lotus) "Yeah, didn't say nothin' jus' that she was leavin'." she sighed, running her hand over her head and down her neck. "S-She's not going to jus' leave I'm-" she was interrupted by Riylli, remembering they were here to meet said lady. "Oh...I don't know, maybe? But she wanted to meet Gull, so maybe we should wait?"

(Cravendy Hound) Baldur crosses his arms. “She makes a bad first impression, skipping out on the meeting like this. But since you two are here...maybe we can just have this be a meet and greet?”

(Riylli Aliapoh) Riylli lets out a heavy sigh. "I... Guess..? Maybe it'll help with the mission?" She looked up to Rising again, before remembering their cover story and turned back to Baldur. "Er... Mission to advance her singin' career."

(Rising Lotus) Rising dragged her hand down her face, trying her best to collect herself. "Aye..." she shook her head quickly. "We ought to do somethin' before she decides not to meet with us. We'll jus' have to say that.." she took a few moments to remember the alibi. "..Gull, had some urgent.. singin' matters to attend to."

(Riylli Aliapoh) Riylli grinned. "We can say she had a bit to drink earlier but she's a total lightweight and couldn't make it. Probably not that far off from the truth even!"

(Cravendy Hound) “I’m sure Miss Rot would understand. She’s a business woman too, after all,” Baldur chimes in. He then begins to walk down the Alley, past vendors hawking exotic wares and savory snacks. Eventually, he leads you to a building emblazoned with crimson banners. The Red Spice Emporium awaits.

(Rising Lotus) Merely nodded and hurried to catch up with Baldur. "..Maybe we ought to not say she was drinkin' though..probably gonna leave a bad impression...even if it's true."

(Riylli Aliapoh) The Miqo'te shrugged and followed along, gazing curiously at the various stalls they passed on their way to the ominous building

(Cravendy Hound) Stepping into the building, the boy exchanges a few words with a Roegadyn clerk at the front desk, and then the trio is led into a small conference room. A petite midlander with greying auburn hair swivels in her chair to face you all with a tight smile. “Hello! This is Singing Gull’s party, correct?”

(Riylli Aliapoh) "Mostly! Gull couldnt... really make it unfortunately. But we were hopin' we could still talk to Rot and see if we can't work somethin' out anyroad!"

(Rising Lotus) Nodded along. "Aye, we're hopin' she'll be 'round soon at least, but we can get things started maybe?" she shrugged "We don't want to waste her time an' all, since she's lettin' us see her."

(Cravendy Hound) Mindred’s hair falls loose on her shoulders, and she’s wearing a neat red shirt that has her business logo embroidered at the pocket. At the news of Singing Gull being missing, she  pauses, shock flashing in her eyes for a second. Then it’s gone, and her smile is even wider. “Ah...don’t worry. I know how it is with celebrities. Always sending their lackeys to do the actual work.”

(Riylli Aliapoh) Riylli plops herself down onto one of the conference room chairs. "Tell me about it... Barely even left us a note either!" She said with an overdramatic sigh. "She's lucky we like her so much. How does this all work anyroad? I aint really all that familiar with loans to be honest..."

(Rising Lotus) "Aye, she's a right fine singer, but you know..." she turned her attention to Riylli as she started speaking, rubbing her temples as she brought up her unfamiliarity with loans. "...Well I'm fairly familiar with how they work at any rate." she shot Riylli a glare.

(Riylli Aliapoh) The Miqo'te tilts her head, not really sure why she was getting glared at all of the sudden

(Cravendy Hound) The woman laces her fingers together, elbows braced against the fine mahogany table. “You tell me how much you want, and I lay out some options...There are a couple forms I’ll need you to fill out, but given as your Lady isn’t here, you may mail them back to me at your earliest convenience.” She slides out a thin stack of papers.

(Riylli Aliapoh) Riylli accepts the papers and begins to flip through them, before realizing she really didn't understand what she was looking at anyways and hands them off to Rising

(Cravendy Hound) “These papers will allow me to follow up on Gull’s loan history, which I’ll use to determine whether I want to approve the loan or not. If all works out, I’ll have the money ready for you to pick up,” Mindred states. She looks at Baldur for a second, her smile unflinching.

(Rising Lotus) Rising was quick to try and take the lead. "We're lookin' for 'round..." she paused to take the papers from Riylli, trying to think of a believable number. "uh...twenty-five thousand was it? Most to cover...costs an' get her face..well voice.. out there more. I'm sure we'll be makin' it back quick though.." she started flipping through the pages.

(Cravendy Hound) Mindred’s gaze rolls back onto Rising. “Mm, I see. I’ll take note of that. This certainly sounds like a promising deal...so I do hope everything else falls in order.” She slides out her business card to Rising, and seems to be waiting for one in turn.

(Riylli Aliapoh) Riylli stares at the business card for quite some time, clearly trying to figure out what it was but not wanting to actually ask.

(Rising Lotus) "We'll have her look over these soon as we see her next, get it all figured out. You're a busy lady after all seems like." picking up the card and reading it quickly, she then realized what Rot was waiting for. "Oh, sorry...we are lookin' to make some more, caught us right after a show out in uh, Thanalan. Lots got picked up there."

(Cravendy Hound) Mindred chuckles. “Ah. Here, you can borrow this.” She takes a notepad and pen out from a sliding drawer underneath the desk, and presents it to Riylli. “Just leave me with some kind of contact information, so I can follow up.”

(Cravendy Hound) “Business can move fast. I’d like to be able to reach out to your party just in case.”

(Riylli Aliapoh) "...Contact..?" She asked, looking up to Rising for a moment. She wasn't so sure about giving them the name of Heartwood, still not entirely sure whatever they were up to was on the right side of the law. "Can I give you my linkpearl? My clan's a bit hard to find, so it'd be much easier that way"

Rising Lotus started to sweat as she saw the paper and pen placed before Riylli, fingers curling closed as she hope she put something not stupid. Her eyes narrowed at the answer, offering up the linkpearl was a classy move, but the mention of clans...

(Cravendy Hound) “Clans? Is that what you call your....singing troupe?” She gives Riylli an odd look, but accepts the linkpearl regardless.

(Rising Lotus) Rising was fast to butt in yet again. "Oh that's jus' what she calls our little.." she twirled her hand around "Group, like us together, but not what our singin' group is called! It's jus's Singin' Gull is all."

(Rising Lotus) "Jus' a Miqo'te thing, how she was raised, we're her clan. That's what it is."

(Riylli Aliapoh) Happily hands over her linkpearl, Rising able to spy a number of them in her pouch alongside that faintly glowing mcguffin. She looked up at Rising as she spoke. "Uh... Yeah, just a bit of Keeper lingo I guess, don't worry about it. Just contact me on that, and I'll gather up Gull and the crew to come handle the payment. Hopefully she actually show's up next time."

(Cravendy Hound) Mindred seems satisfied with this explanation. “I do not see many of your kind around these parts, forgive me. I did not know.”

(Cravendy Hound) hMMMMM THE mcguffin -eyes- )) (Riylli Aliapoh) (ITLL SEE USE ONE OF THESE DAYS I SWEAR) (Rising Lotus) also did she steal all those linkpearls?)) (Riylli Aliapoh) (I plead the fifth) (Cravendy Hound) djfkslfdjs LOL where do they phone to?? )) (Riylli Aliapoh) (To her! She keeps a bunch on her to hand out for jobs and such, since she's trying to build a reputation (Rising Lotus) Probably should stop doing bow things in the woods then xD)) (Riylli Aliapoh) ('Bow things in the woods' describes 99% of Keeper activities)

(Cravendy Hound) “May this loan go well, and both our gilpurses benefit. As soon as you send the forms, my clerks will be at the ready.” Mindred leans back and then directs her attention to Baldur, who had so far been standing guard at the door. “Baldur, I’ve heard you’ve picked up the axe. You should’ve told me that was what your most recent loan was for! Why, you’ll break this old woman’s heart at this rate.”

(Cravendy Hound) Baldur looks awkwardly to the side as Mindred continues, a loving drawl in her voice. “If it’s herowork you’re looking for, why didn’t you come to me? I’ve got just the problem...a troublemaker hounding my caravans as of late. Innocents in need of help. Do your father proud, why don’t you? That’s what heroes do.”

(Cravendy Hound) Baldur looks exceptionally confused, but Mindred cuts him off. From how he responds, you come to realize that she probably talks over him often. “Call it intuition, but I have a feeling you’ll really grow from this encounter. Now, run along and play.” She turns to Rising and Riylli. “Hopefully, I’ll be speaking with your group soon.”

(Riylli Aliapoh) Riylli's ears immediately perked up with undisguised interest. "Oh! I can help out with that! I do a bit of hero work of my own y'know!" She says, leaning forward excitedly

(Cravendy Hound) Mindred smiles at Riylli’s interjection. “Perfect. I’ll be sure to pay you both, then.”

(Riylli Aliapoh) The Miqo'te grins, ears wiggling even. "Sure! You can use that same linkshell to contact me for that too! I'm sure with me and Baldur on the case your caravans got nothin' to worry about!" She says, flashing Baldur a friendly thumbs-up

(Rising Lotus) Rising used all of her restraint to not smack Riylli's ears clean off her head. "Sure, with any luck we'll run into Gull along the way." she punctuated her sentence with a bit, strained smile. "I 'spose we ought to be off then, our singer has kept you waitin' but we won't!"

(Cravendy Hound) Baldur sends Riylli an uneasy look, though it’s not because of her. He gives Mindred a quick bow and then steps out first to hold the door open for Riylli and Rising. There’s something on his mind.

(Rising Lotus) Rising Bows as well, placing a hand on Riylli's upper back to force her to bow as well. "Thank you for your time mam!"

(Riylli Aliapoh) Riylli grunts a bit as she's forced to bow, but manages to keep any particularly offensive comments to herself as she rises and follows Rising and Baldur out of the room. "I was totally gonna do that already y'know! I know how to be polite!" She mutters to the Roegadyn once away from the loan-shark's hearing

(Cravendy Hound) Baldur doesn’t stop walking until you all are gooood distance away. “Um, well that went well for you guys? I guess?” He fidgets at the hem of his glove, then lets out a sigh.

(Rising Lotus) Making sure they were out of earshot from not only the people of Rot's establishment but also Baldur, she glare down to Riylli. "If you don't know anythin' 'bout somethin', next time keep your mouth SHUT." she said the last part sharply. "You know what people like her do Riylli? They break legs an' fingers! She's gonna tell somethin's not right." she brought her hand to her face "An' we still ain't seen Cravs, so much to plan for the fishin' trip, an' now this..." her breathing was growing a bit rapid as Baldur approached. "A-Aye." she pushes it all down for now "considerin' we can't find our star an' all."

(Riylli Aliapoh) Riylli looks up at the Roegadyn. "Pssh, so what, I do that too!" She says dismissively, before wandering off and up towards Baldur to give him a friendly pat on the back alongside a fanged grin. "It did! Sounds like you and me are gonna be workin' together soon too! I'll be sure to share all the tips and tricks I've learned with ya, don't worry!"

(Cravendy Hound) Baldur takes the pat like a champ, does his best to mirror Riylli’s positive attitude. But ultimately, that troubled look returns to his face. “Yeah, I’m really thankful you jumped in too actually. Mindred's got a habit of...well. Let’s just say she tends to teach by tossing someone into the frying pan without any safety guards.”

(Cravendy Hound) In a lower voice, Baldur adds: “Sometimes, I feel like she wants me to fail. Either that, or I’m shit at meeting her lofty expectations.”

(Riylli Aliapoh) Riylli raised an eyebrow. "Ah, that type huh? Don't worry, I'll keep you safe." She said, giving him a slightly gentler pat. She turned back to Rising. "Well, aside from the rough teachin' methods, she seemed nice enough to me? Maybe were lookin' for someone else on the list after all?"

(Rising Lotus) Rising rubbed the bridge of her nose. "Well whatever may attack ain't going to be much a threat with us there. Done this sort of work thousands of times. Bandits aren't a big deal." she rolled her eyes as Riylli brought that up so close to the lad. "Loan sharks act nice at first, once your indebted to them that's when they strike." she'd reply back in a hushed tone.

(Cravendy Hound) “Bandits at my level...seems pretty fast, is all,” Baldur says. He looks over a paper containing the job’s details. “Sheesh. Mindred’s putting us to work right away. You got time? Like...now, now.”

(Riylli Aliapoh) Riylli blinked. "...Wait, like NOW now, now? Uh... I guess I'm free. Ish. Supposed to be huntin' tonight, but whatever... I'm sure Ava'll understand." She shrugged, then looked over to Rising for her opinion

(Rising Lotus) Rising raised an eyebrow at that. "So you're suddenly not runnin' smack into things?" she managed to chuckle lightly, probably really needing a lightened spirit after the night so far. "We might as well, not like Gull is 'round here or nothin'.." she sighed, chewing her lower lip as she glanced around incase Cravs would finally make an appearance.

(Cravendy Hound) Baldur nods. “Yeah, NOW now. This is nuts, right? Like, I’ve never done a guard job in my life, but this is weird, right?” But the money was too good to pass up. He’d risk it.

(Riylli Aliapoh) Riylli nods to Rising and Baldur in turn. "If you wanna be a hero, you gotta be ready to jump into action at a moments notice! Try not to worry so much, I got protection spells to keep you safe and Rising there is a great meatshield. You just focus on learnin', we'll handle the rough parts!"

(Rising Lotus) "Like I said it should be fine. Let's get it over with, I've dealth with a behemoth in Dravania I'm sure whatever might attack it here won't be an issue." she would hurry forward, only to realize Baldur was the one that knew where to go.

The Job -----

(Cravendy Hound) Waiting at the road’s junction is a caravan (C), “Red Spice Emporium” painted on the vehicle’s canvas like a big target. It’s handled by two employees - one to direct the chocobos, and another to ride in the back. They’re expecting guards, but are surprised to see Baldur with you two. One of them gives the boy a proud pat on the back and then, you’re off.

(Cravendy Hound) The first part of the trip is uneventful. Just orange orchards and hills of grass - maybe the occasional stray goobbue at a distance. But at the halfway mark, a small canister tumbles out from the right and you see it only for a second before it goes off. A flashbang!?

(Cravendy Hound) Something attempts to hit when the flashbang goes off. Roll to defend!

(Cravendy Hound) lmao buildup? what's that xD )) Random! Riylli Aliapoh rolls a 211. (Rising Lotus) Random! 267 (Cravendy Hound) Random! 586 (Cravendy Hound) me sweating as I watch the time :-)  )) (Riylli Aliapoh) (I warned you!)

(Cravendy Hound) Whoever it was makes contact. You feel something hit you on your shoulder - a sleep dart? It’s fast acting, but with your combat experience, you resist for the moment.

(Rising Lotus) Good thing both of my shoulders are armored)) (Rising Lotus) kind of xD)) (Cravendy Hound) ayyy :D well one of them lol )) (Riylli Aliapoh) (Time to attack or are we still blind?) (Cravendy Hound) it was a flashbang so now your eyes are kinda blearly. can kinda see ))

(Riylli Aliapoh) Riylli was looking directly at the flashbang when it went off, learning a lot of new things about the world today. She tries to swing her staff blindly as she feels the dart hit her, only to realize quickly that wasn't going to help anything. Not able to do much else, she decides to cast stoneskin on herself to try and keep herself safe from whatever was inevitably coming next

(Cravendy Hound) Baldur hits the ground and crawls into the caravan for cover. “Someone’s shooting at us? Anyone catch them?” He looks to his right and finds one of the caravan’s employees, fast asleep. Shit.

(Rising Lotus) Rising had brought her arm up to shield her face as she saw the thing throw into the road, but still was a bit affected by the flash. The dart to her exposed shoulder caused her to shriek out, it didn't particularly hurt but she had a thing about needles now. She felt a numbness moving over her upper body. Cursing, she let her eyes readjust as she looked for their enemy.

(Cravendy Hound) More shots - from the north! At this distance, you see someone aiming a gun in your direction. Dressed in black and blue, their face is obscured by a wide-brimmed hat.

(Cravendy Hound) this is not necessarily ICly cravs but here's an outfit ))

(Rising Lotus) Catching a glimpse of their assailant, Rising grit her teeth and ducked  behind cover. "Riylli! North of here, get some rocks thrown in that direction!" she ordered, waiting for her distraction to press her assault.

(Riylli Aliapoh) Riylli nods, having arguments but not willing to waste time. She began to pull shards of earth and stone from the ground, launching them forward like small spears in the hopes of forcing the assailant to move and disrupting their aim. "Baldur, stay with the sleeping guards! You're on defence, got it?"

(Cravendy Hound) There’s a pause between the next barrage of shots and - while the bandit’s aim is good, you’d notice that the ammunition being used is all nonlethal. Sleep darts, rubber bullets, etc. Riylli’s hunk of rock forces the bandit to change positions, and now, she’s simply down the road. Far, but straight ahead.

(Rising Lotus) Their enemy was still a bit far away for Rising's comfort, but staying still wasn't going to help with the tranquilizer flowing through her veins. She charged forward, spear at the ready to run the gunner through, non lethal ammo or not.

(Cravendy Hound) Baldur doesn’t listen. Instead, he uses his axe to tear open a crate within the caravan, causing its contents to spill. The crate converted into boards, he tosses Riylli her own wooden shields. “Use this! I’m going in!” Makeshift shield held forward, he blindly charges up the road.

(Cravendy Hound) When Rising charges forward, the bandit takes an uncertain step back. The sight of Baldur also moving forward gives them hesitation. Then, without a word, the bandit tosses a gas canister in between them, and it begins to spew an obscuring gas.

(Riylli Aliapoh) Riylli blinks and instinctively accepts the board, staring at it in confusion for a moment before realizing Baldur had run off. "What part of protection magic don't you get!" She called out, throwing the board to the side and immediately chasing after him. She does her best to cast stoneskin on him as well, but casting complex spells like that while moving would prove to be rather difficult. "Would! You! Stop! Running!"

(Cravendy Hound) ahahha Riylli playing babysitter xD )) (Riylli Aliapoh) (Baldur is the newbie tank overpulling in dungeons) (Cravendy Hound) HE IS )) (Cravendy Hound) undergeared underleveled )) (Rising Lotus) Healer just needs to adjust)) (Riylli Aliapoh) (Riylli is gonna learn swiftcast after this) (Cravendy Hound) pffff ))

(Cravendy Hound) “This is what heroes do, didn’t you say?!” Baldur shouts back. The gas from the canister is starting to build - think of it at like 40% opacity.

(Riylli Aliapoh) "Don't listen to me dammit! I'm a bad influence!" She yells angrily, managing to very slowly build her spell as she begins to catch up with Baldur.

(Rising Lotus) Rising just passed the canister as it's tossed out, trying to keep her lock on the gunner while her vision slowly became clouded. She was poised to impale them if she made it, though the dart's poison slowed her running speed by a bit, gradually taking a greater toll.

(Cravendy Hound) The bandit seems distracted, or maybe confused. In his recklessness, Baldur chucks his axe at the bandit and grabs their attention. They easily move out of the way of the axe - but the attack succeeds in another way. From dodging the axe, the bandit takes a hit from Rising’s lance!

Riylli Aliapoh >> So! To phrase this in a way that can avoid spoilers: Does Riylli manage to recognize the scent? (Just say no if you dont want that revealed yet) Cravendy Hound >> honestly, you'd mostly smell a TON of alcohol ahah )) Riylli Aliapoh >> ITS CRAVS Cravendy Hound >> I NEVER SAID IT WAS )) Riylli Aliapoh >> Lmao!

(Rising Lotus) The bandit was lucky enough to only get grazed in the side instead of being full on shish kabobed, but it was still a clean cut! Once the distance had been fully bridged, she let go of her spear with her armor fist and aimed to punch the bandit in the face, even in her drugged state there seemed to be a lot of aggression behind that strike, the bandit could only wonder how Rising's day was going.

(Riylli Aliapoh) Riylli manages to finally cast her stoneskin spell once they had both caught up with the assailant, showering Baldur in aether in order to ensure he would come out of this skirmish uninjured. She would need a moment to recover after that however, the amount of charging needed for that spell being much greater thanks to Baldur's recklessness

(Cravendy Hound) roll for the punch? :D )) (Rising Lotus) Random! 3 (Rising Lotus) wow)) (Riylli Aliapoh) (wow (Cravendy Hound) that's impressive!)) (Riylli Aliapoh) (dont do drugs kids) (Rising Lotus) Hits her face lightly then passes out xD))

(Cravendy Hound) The bandit wobbles back, one hand at her bleeding side and the other with their gun at the ready. It would seem that the tranquilizer is kicking in, and they easily dodge Rising’s blow.

(Cravendy Hound) But when Baldur draws close, and when the kid and bandit lock eyes with each other, they both freeze in place. As if they’ve seen a ghost, or worse. A demon.

(Cravendy Hound) The smoke thickens, your vision grows grey with it. When it clears, the bandit is gone.

(Rising Lotus) The dashing and strong attacks had left Rising bereft of her strength, all the activity just pumping the tranq through her veins quicker. She stumbled back, swinging her spear in slow wide arc as the bandit vanished, hitting nothing and then falling to one knee, panting heavily.

Rising Lotus drops to her knee winded.

(Riylli Aliapoh) Riylli grits her teeth, falling to her knees. Her smaller size combined with the wasteful spellcasting meant the drug was taking effect much quicker than with Rising, though she was trying her absolute best to hold on. "Baldur... You good?"

(Rising Lotus) Rising was looking too hazy to ask about her teammates, she merely raised a hand to grip the dart still in her shoulder, pulling it out with a whimper and tossing it as far as she could down the road, which wasn't too far right now.

(Cravendy Hound) There’s something feral behind Baldur’s glare. An uncontrollable rage, deep rooted and cold. “That was...but they said....” Riylli and Rising momentarily forgotten, he simply stands here, consumed by something bitter.

(Cravendy Hound) Baldur snaps out of it and goes over to Rising. “Shit, you okay? Come on, wake up.” He shakes her in an attempt to help her. And to Riylli: "I'm good. You two...how can I help?"

(Riylli Aliapoh) Riylli was way too tired to deal with vague mutterings. "Hey! Focus! Are you okay!? Who was it?"

(Rising Lotus) Finally succumbed to the poison, collapsing in the road into a deep sleep.

(Cravendy Hound) While bracing against Rising’s weight, Baldur hesitates. His heart feels rooted to his throat, his blood burning hot at his temples. He hesitates. And then he finds his courage. “If I’m not crazy...if my eyes aren’t lying to me...”

(Cravendy Hound) “The one who killed my pa.”

(Cravendy Hound) Risings gonna have some nice, deep sleep tonight )) (Rising Lotus) Probably the best she's gotten in a while xD))

(Riylli Aliapoh) Riylli just stares at him for a moment before letting out a sigh. She proceeds to reach up to hand him the linkpearl from her ear. "We'll deal with that in the morning, 'kay..? Tell Ava what happened... Sorry if she yells at you..." She mutters, before closing her eyes and allowing herself to give in to the drug

[spookyboogie3]

MY FAVORITE AH MOMENTS W/O R*an H*yw**d

Also keep in mind some of these moments i picked Bitch Face r*an may have been present for but this aint about his stupid ass. 

The straw bit on Off Topic

Fiona and Trevor’s “Look at us” “Look at us” “Look at us” in TTT

Drunk Jeremy inhaling helium, followed by Jack and Trevor on Off Topic

“Krusty KrAYAYAB!!!” TTT

Jeremy trying to slam his face through a table, followed by Michael doing the same thing

“my god…… the munchdew” “NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!” Minecraft: Skyfactory

Actually all of Simple Farmer Geoff from Skyfactory

Whatever those sounds were that Jack was making in the beginning of GTA video

Alfredo screaming as he continues to fall down a steep tube in a GTA race

DESTROYING THEIR OFFICE DEAR LORD

“How did he drown though?” “UNDERWATER, MATT!”

Anytime Fiona starts to RAGE in TTT (bonus if others join in)

The time Gav was the phantom in TTT and he kept dying and being brought back and Jack spitting water and then trying to catch it

Alfredo’s Magoo moments in Minecraft

Geoff laughing in the background of a video hes not in

Lindsay fucking around with Chef Mike on Harecore Minigolf

Lindsay fucking around in general

Gavin and Fiona playing Animal Crossing and laughing at the stupidest shit

The Fish Tempura incident on Wheel of Fortune

Lindsay’s reasoning for why her and Michael should have 4 kids

Geoff’s fucking ad reads (my favorite is 23&Me)

The whole thing during Push the Button where everyone especially Michael gets mad at Fiona because she said the best candy to get while trick or treating was lollipops

Matt’s fucking desk in the corner of the room

Anytime Millie is in a video

Everyone falling off the pink ladder during TTT and dying repeatedly because of it

Alfredo “the two-time champ” Diaz dying very early in YDYD 3

Gavin and Michael fucking up almost every game they play on Play Pals

RAY OR NO and then RAY OR NAY on Off Topic

Reddit Roasts Geoff

Gavin asking if someone could kill 20 cows with their bare hands and the proceeding so say he could rip out a cow’s veins by reaching into its neck

Ify’s narration during Let’s Roll Ave Caesar

The internet losing its shit when Jeremy shaved his head years ago

“We need a knife” Gavin comes back with a hammer

Griffin chain sawing the Off Topic table up

“How do I put the boat in the water??” “Right click you animal”

As of 2020, 8 years of playing Minecraft, certain people still do not know how to play the basics of this fucking game.

Honestly it took over 200 episodes for some of them to figure out how the compass worked. You know after they decided that the sun was setting in the wrong direction. (this was in 2016??)

Flynt coal still is a joke they make

So is Day 2

Whatever happened in that GTA lets play where someone called a mugger or a hit on someone and the game glitched and 50 guys showed up and lined up on the street below from where they were playing

Anytime Gavin gets mugged, it’s an old running gag but it’s a classic

The time a mugger fucking started driving the fire truck away after mugging Gavin with Michael and Jeremy still in the truck thinking the other is driving and it takes them like 2 minutes to realize what happened while Gavin’s yelling “come back”

They got a water jug and immediately started water boarding each other

“It pinged and went dingle”

“Hey Trey-Boi” “Hey Gay-Boi” Immediately realizes what he has said

Jeremy’s website puns

(OLD) Ray jerking off in the corner during a let’s play

(OLD) the world in Minecraft never loading and everyone screaming about as Geoff says its fine for him

Jeremy’s “I AM MONSTER TRUCK”

Jack taking AH to Disney……in Minecraft

On Twitter, Gavin asked about recommendations for a computer mouse and Fiona starts sending him pictures of actual mice.

“Its not ghey, if its on the moon”

Literally anything Fiona does as Po

Jeremy saying the heterosexual flag is boring

UNO THE MOVIE!

Geoff fucking cackling the whole time.

“here’s looking at you kid”

the video was almost 3 hours long

“you know what my favorite color is? blue” “oh really? You know what my favorite hand is? Yours

They all want it to end but no one wants to lose and so they fuck each other and that prolongs the game. Also they put on more rules, so they just keep getting more cards if they don’t have a card to match the previous

Alfredo saying he won’t participate in ghost hunter because he knows what happens to people of color in horror movies

Fiona walking in on Off Topic with a protein shake and Gavin asks if shes drinking milk and she says without missing a beat “ah no that’s cum” and everyone laughed not expecting the answer

(OLD) “SURPRISE MOTHERFUCKER” *falls in hole*

(OLD) Ray and Gav running in a panel dressed as X-Ray and Vav and Ray running the whole way around the room before he got to the stage

Duck taping Jeremy to the wall

(OLD) All of Minecraft Episode 3 Plan G (This was the very first AH video I watch and why I know who they are)

Geoff and Gav creating Achievement City and giving everyone houses just to prank Jack into burning house down with lava.

Ray’s house is a dirt block with no furniture and single torch

Geoff’s giant ass house next to Ray’s tiny house

Jack tries to destroy everything with lava throughout the episode

“lets be honest, I realistically didn’t lose anything”

Michael stealing art from Gav’s house “NOO! I want nice things”

The sign to Michael’s says “Awaiting Approval, Awaiting Approval, Awaiting Approval” he runs into house and say “I’m home”

Ray also steals this sign at some point

Plan G – The failsafe.

“Oh whats this? Is this a button? Whats this? (pushes button) Yeah it was a button”

“Did you push the button?”

“Yeah”

“okay”

“wh-what does it do?”

“uh…”

Cue Achievement City beginning to explode as Michael starts screaming

Rays reaction “NO, MY SHITTY HOUSE JUST GOT EVEN SHITTIER!”

Not something funny but something VERY IMPORTANT. AH admitting that they all fucked up and how shitty their behavior was when dealing with harassment in the fanbase. People were racist, sexist, homophobic, misogynistic, and just downright horrible to a lot of the employees at RT and AH. This came up after Mica Burton left the company and talked about it publicly and how nothing was done about it. Fiona who also experiences these same things, along with Lindsay and other employees, but Fiona took the charge on the Off Topic talking about people can’t continue to get away with that behavior. She got to sound off her feelings to a group of white men who all respected her and LISTENED to what was saying and how she felt. She cried; Geoff cried. They all want to do more, so this doesn’t happen in the future and they’re not tolerating the racist and horrible comments. AH taking a mature moment to talk about how they failed to stop these comments and Geoff was right when he said the company has a long way to go.

 Outside of AH each member has more to them than just all of the comedy and laughs and dumb shit they do

Geoff helped found Roosterteeth and Achievement Hunter. He has a beautiful daughter in Millie who is awesome in her own right. He’s a recovering alcoholic. Currently doing F**k Face podcasts. Was in the fucking army. Takes accountability for every mistake he makes.  

Jack also helped start Achievement Hunter. He does so much work for charity. His twitter is full of things to help people go vote. He’s like the dad to AH, especially Fiona. He’s happily married to his wife Caiti.

Michael was an electrician and has a lot of handy man experience. He made a few videos online about him raging at games and that got the attention of RT. He’s currently married to Lindsay who he met because of RT. They have two kids together.

Gavin is an expert at high speed filmmaking and know how use and edit footage from a slow-motion camera. He has worked on actual films. One of the creators of the Slow Mo Guys. Worked his ass off to get to work for RT. Currently dating model and cosplayer Meg Turney

Lindsay flips between being the mom of the group and a complete chaos queen and we all love her for it. She started as an editor for the RT podcast and then AH stuff. She is an incredible voice actor, most known for Ruby Rose (RWBY), Space Kid (Camp Camp), Hilda (Xray & Vav) just to name a few. She also has a degree in finance

Jeremy started as a fan who made videos on the community page. He took over Ray’s place after Ray left to do Twitch full time. He is a self-published author and a skilled rapper and singer. He’s currently married to his wife, Kat.

Matt also started as a fan making videos on the community page. He actually interacted and made stuff for the guys in really early Minecraft episodes. Seriously this guy is like king of Minecraft. He has a degree in electrical engineering. He also has pretty decent singing voice.

Trevor is THE BOSS. Has a degree in aero-space engineering and is getting paid to babysit AH. Currently dating Barbara Dunkelman, RTs queen of puns.

Alfredo worked at IGN before RT and is a well-known streamer. He is the best when it comes to first person shooter games. He and Trevor look so similar.

Fiona. Po. Her majesty. Host of This Just Internet. A Twitch streamer. Baby of the bunch. Grew up in Europe. Her and Gav act like a pair of siblings. She has stated and showed time and time again she will fight for people to have safe spaces for anyone who needs them.

Ify, our new guy. He is wonderful and I want to stay forever. He’s a comedian, a writer, and an actor. Co hosts F-ing Around with Fiona. Has his own film podcast, Who Shot Ya? I look forward to more content with him in it, cause everything he’s been in so far has been great.

 Were all hurting but well make it through this

We have all these wonderful moments and a lot more that I didn’t list and this incredible team of personalities with their own accomplishments and achievements. Not to mention old team members who were also great additions and the entire crew behind the scenes editing and making videos look the best that they can.

 Here’s to Achievement Hunter and to this community. We need to be here for each other in times like these.

@theonyxranger gave me the idea for this based on their own post they made about the fans giving their favorite moments without bitch face and there were just too many. Oop. 

[modernsocialmediaau]

AVALANCE AU

AU: Sara is lead singer in a band called The Legends. Her band mates are; Charlie: Bass Player, Nate: Lead Guitarist, Zari: Drummer, Ray: Pianist. They call their fans beebos. Ava on the other hand is a famous actress with an entourage; Nora her best friend, and stylist, Gary: Manager, and Mona her publicist.

“Rise and shine!” Gary screams from the downstairs, the two are the only one that took care of themselves that night. Everything was going normal until the group caught a glimpse of Ray and Nora locking lips. That’s sort of when all hell broke loose, Sara offered shots and Charlie offered drinking games. 

“If he doesn't stop shouting. I will literally hung him by his leg out in the balcony.” Charlie groans placing a pillow on top of her face, Zari pulls her much closer trying to hide her face while also burying her neck in Charlies shoulder. 

“C’mon love birds.” Sara throws a pillow at the cuddling two. As well as Ray and Nora locking lips, Zari and Charlie made a mistake locking lips right in front of Gary as well as Sara but Sara already knew. 

After an 20 more minutes of Gary shouting and John singing they finally got everyone out of bed for some breakfast. 

Soon after breakfast the crew heads for their hike, it was a rather quiet first hour. Sara and Ava are up front leading the way, talking about god knows what while the others are behind them scheming. 

“Now that you two are settled, can we focus on those two.” Charlie points at the two blondes leading the way,

“Charlie, Ava needs time to heal” 

“And Sara--” Nate sighs knowing how much mending a broken heart is hard, but having had a pile of broken hearts after the other tends to wound an individual. 

“Need to heal as well,” Ray sighs

“Okay but you guys can’t tell me that last night they weren’t up on each other or vibing at all.” Mona coo’s looking ahead to see the two girls examining the trail 

“So what they’re friends, what if they are—“ Nate is cut off by the conversation the two girls are having up ahead. Ava is currently holding the map far from Sara’s reach, she’s using her butt as a shield.

“Just let me see it for one second.” Ava argues

“Why Miss-Know-It-All,” Sara teases bumping into Ava catching her in surprise letting her guard down. “You didn’t” Ava scoffs, but Sara took that opportunity to take the map and run away from Ava. 

“Are you kidding though.” Mona woo’s pointing at the two playing tag with one another

“Okay but they’ve been like that since the beginning of their friendship, they’re both extremely headstrong. Sara is extremely rebellious and from what I noticed Ava is a little controlling.” Nate explains following the two blonde girls still play fighting over the map 

“What’s wrong with him?” Gary mumbles, John shrugs taking out a cigarette as they follow, everyone starts to do the same but Nora puts her hand out to stop everyone else from walking. 

“Okay new plan, do we force them to be together, or do we let them heal properly and hope that they’ll get together?” Nora speaks up leaving Zari, Ray and Charlie stuck 

“Well clearly forcing them together isn't working out,” Ray starts 

“Exactly when we do that they seem to butt heads but—” Zari continues 

“When we leave them alone they come together naturally—”Charlie adds

“Which leaves us with the question again, do we keep forcing them together? Or do we let them heal—”

“Hey guys! C’mon the lake is up ahead!” Sara shouts summoning the last four to catch up to them. 

“Well Ava leaves in a month and you guys leave in 2. Which means everyone will be gone, and your tour is going to last what—?” Nora schemes as they slowly walk trying to create some space as they scheme 

“7 month at the most.” Ray informs 

“Which means we let fate decide?” Charlie questions

“That just may be our best bet.” Zari pulls Charlie to walk faster since everyone doesn't have a choice on what to do about the two. 

1 Hour Later...

“Who knew Mona Wu could cook?” Nora jokes as everyone is enjoying their lunch with some coffee, and tea. 

“Well if you guys actually came over for food every once in a while instead of going out to eat you’d actually see how I can cook.” Mona defenses rolling her eyes making everyone cackle. As they continue to eat Sara somehow sneaks away from the group, and of course Ava notices which means she follows. 

Nobody else notice the two girls sneak away. As Ava gets closer to Sara she whispers “Hey! Where are you going?” 

“Hey, stalker.” Sara chuckles continuing to her path, up a hill 

“I’m not a stalker, you just left and what if you get stuck or lost or something?” 

“Whatever floats your boat”

“So what are you doing exactly?” 

“Wanted a better view, better views give me better ideas, lyrics, melodies—”

“You’ve got writers block?” 

“Yup, and it’s killing me because it is literally the last song of the album and we’re suppose to record it when we get back into town Monday.” 

“Oh well then I’ll leave you alone—” There’s a pause, a part of Ava that wants Sara to ask her to stay but she can understand why the girl might want her alone time

“No wait, can I bounce things off of you?” Ava smiles before turning back around to Sara

“I’ll do my best—What do you got?” 

Sara takes her phone out and pulls up the instrument of her empty music.  The two sit for 6 minutes just trying to get the feel of the music. 

“First of all, I love the sound—do you have a concept?”

“I don’t know nothing is really connecting to me and the whole album is coming together but this song would take it to a whole ‘nother level”

“Alright let’s start with this what haven't you wrote about?” 

“Seriously?” 

“Seriously.” 

“A break up, I refuse. I’ll write about everything else but I don’t know I always feared that I’ll cry during one of the shows and crying is—”

“Disgusting—”Ava jokes

“Exactly but if thats’ the next best thing I’ll take it. So breaks up...break ups”

“How did your break up with Alex go? I know this is personal and might be a little too weird to talk about but—”

“No it’s okay, it was in the end of March and my ex girlfriend Alex broke up with me. She said that she felt lonely every time we were together because I was so busy with everything going on with my life. And she wasnt wrong—”

“Alright what made this break up hard?”

“She found somebody else, this amazing detective named Maggie Sawyer—I guess it hurt a lot because we were friends for 8 years then we dated and I just kind of assume we’d get married and do the whole house and kids thing but to be replaced so quickly hurt.”

“Do you want her back?”

“No I dont want her back but I hate thinking about her with somebody else.”

“Okay so let’s write about that mindset, you dont want her but you hate seeing her with his Maggie person.”

“That’s not bad, Sharpe. Not bad at all.”

30 minutes later

“Let’s hear it, Lance.” Ava runs back to Sara from going to the lake to meditate to hear what she’s got so far.

“It’s rough but hear me out,

So I heard you found somebody else And at first I thought it was a lie I took all my things that make sounds The rest I can do without

I don't want your body But I hate to think about you with somebody else Our love has gone cold You're intertwining your soul with somebody else

“That’s so—What the actual fuck—keep going.” 

“That’s all I’ve got so far, I was thinking of adding another chorus like 

I'm looking through you while you're looking through your phone And then leaving with somebody else No, I don't want your body But I'm picturing your body with somebody else

“Yes that’s good. Next verse c’mon don’t slack now—”

“Feel free to shout some ideas—jeez this is hard.”

“Right sorry, okay same melody right?” 

“Yup, all I’ve got for the second verse is

c’mon baby

this aint the last time—

That I’ve been amazed?”

“No that doesn't make sense, what about that I've seen your face then repeat c’mon baby almost like calling her out as well as calling out to her.”

Come on baby This ain't the last time that I'll see your face Come on baby

“I hate that I can be replaced?”

“You said you’d find someone to take my place?” 

“We’re going to go with yours I dont want her to think this is about her in the slightest—then I have this crazy idea that I thought of as soon as you left ”

I just don't believe that you have got it in you 'cause We are just gonna keep 'doin' it' and everytime I start to believe in anything you're saying I'm reminded that I should be getting over it

“I love that its a shift but not too noticeable where it throws the person off”

“Thank you, then the chorus repeats—

I don't want your body But I hate to think about you with somebody else Our love has gone cold You're intertwining your soul with somebody elseI'm looking through you while you're looking through your phone And then leaving with somebody else No, I don't want your body But I'm picturing your body with somebody else

“Do you have any ideas for the bridge?” 

“I want it to almost be chant like so that whoever is listening to this is getting a looking at themselves in the mirror and my friends said I need to get over the last bit of you and so here I am hyping myself up in this mirror type of feel.” 

“Specific I’m all ears.”

“I want it to build up like this;

I don't want your body, I don't want your body I don't want your body, I don't want your body I don't want your body, I don't want your body

then how about, get someone you love? get someone you need?”

“Fuck that, get money!” Ava jokes but Sara disagrees. 

“Genius—

Get someone you love? Get someone you need? Fuck that, get money”

“Damn I am a genius.” Ava nods 

“Right, but it needs one more line before I go on a chanting spree—”

“Get someone you love? Get someone you need? Fuck that, get money. I can't give you my soul 'cause we're never alone”

“Where do you keep coming up with this?”

“Okay let’s hear it shall we?

Get someone you love? Get someone you need? Fuck that, get money I can't give you my soul 'cause we're never alone Get someone you love? Get someone you need? Fuck that, get money I can't give you my soul 'cause we're never alone Get someone you love? Get someone you need? Fuck that, get money I can't give you my soul 'cause we're never alone Get someone you love? Get someone you need? Fuck that, get money I can't give you my soul 'cause we're never alone”

“That was it! Yes then obviously repeat the chorus right?” 

“Yes and thats the whole song. Thats the whole album WOOHOOO!!!” Sara shouts, pulling Ava into a very tight hug. Ava couldn't help but feel good and oddly giddy having Sara in her arms.

“Oi! Is everything okay?” Charlie waves at the two girls and the two pull away from one another

“I just finished the album you’ve got to hear it!” Sara kisses Ava’s cheek before running towards Charlie. Ava watches Sara making to Charlie, and she decides to sit down to think about what to do.

“What was that up there?” 

“She helped finished the last song of the album which means I finished the album—”

“Sara—calm down, let us hear it then?”

Part 13/?

1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | 16 | 17 | 18 | 19 | 20 | 21 | 22 | 23 | 24 | 25 |

[theuniverseawakens347]

SOMEBODY ( India) FUCKED THE COACH W BROOKE HOE ASS TOO AND WILKING BE DOING INCEST LIKE YA MOMS.. YA WEIRD.. THATS WHY I SAY WARREN RAPED ME.. YA MOMS GOT MY COOCHIE FULLY HYSTERECTOMY IN HER 🖕🏽🤷🏽‍♀️ BITCH YAL DYING!!! TOOK IT THIS DAY BY THE WHITE LADY PLANNED LEE DUMBASS GARLINGTON .. that’s crazy AT DORIS JEAN BENNETT it gets foggy there cause the bitch REALLT BEAT ME BAD BASHING MY HEAD AND SOME MORE SHIT IN THAT HOUSE CRAZY.. BROOKE YOU KNOW AS A LIL CHILD MORGAN YO IVF BABY 🥚🤮 DONERS FOR YO BASIC ASS LIFESTYLES IN TO GET WARREN ROYAL BLUNTS UP N GOING N THE CORONA HOUSE N THE GAME INDIA YOU GAVE YO EGGS TO.. DURING THE PARK NIGHAS AINT WANNFUCK NO MORE CASUE YOU ALWAYS AND I MEAN ALWAYS GOT BV BITCH STINKY ROTTEN EGG W FISH SMELLING COOCHIE CAUSE YO PE PEE SURGERY INFECTED .. aids.. 🤷🏽‍♀️ GOLDEN CURLS LIED THE GAME AINT SLEEP W YOU.. YAL GOT PHOTOS BUR YOU ANOTHER INDIANLOOK ALIKE HOE LIKE CYDNEY TO DRAKE MAKING THAT DAMN “cece on the beat” or whatever song… INDIA N JUSTINNCOMBS YAL PUT TOGETHER THIS CREW ON BEHALF OF DIDDY REQUEST CAUSE HE COULDN’T GET ME .. SO AGAIN BIRCH YOU KNEW WHO INWAS AND TAINTED MY NAME .. AT “LEme fuck Tristan Wilkerson AND INTRODUCE MYSELF AS INDIA CASHAY LOVE WESTBROOK” bitttttch, WHAT!??

[twistedstarlitspirits]

ooc

this is part of a theory of mine (not directly related to my usual headcanons but kinda adjacent related??) relating to Milleniummon and the FACT that he was noted to be Ryou’s Chosen Destined Digimon Partner

oh and here’s a link to the theory i posted earlier today when everyone was probs still sleeping [x]

so i’ve thought for a while how interesting it is that Ryou’s partner is a digimon with a single digicore and is a jogress evolution

to me, that meant that originally, only one of the digimon that would eventually jogress into Milleniummon, was meant as Ryou’s partner, the other? the other had to come from somewhere

so i created some evolution lines, from Baby I/Fresh to Ultimate/Mega, as a note, I’ll be using the Japanese level names for the rest of this post, so when I say Ultimate, I meant Mega Fresh/Baby I -> In-training/Baby II -> Rookie/Child -> Champion/Adult -> Ultimate/Perfect -> Mega/Ultimate

[Pictured: YukimiBotamon -> Tsunomon -> PicoDevimon -> Deltamon -> Kimeramon -> Milleniummon]

[Pictured: Metal Koromon -> Pagumon -> Tsukaimon -> Airdramon -> Gigadramon -> Mugendramon -> Milleniummon]

---

I chose these digimon for a number of reasons, i think they fit also its ironic and vaguely angsty and sad which you will understand once i explain where the other digimon comes from

so... yall know how osamu ichijouji died right? but before that, he and ken had watched a SINGLE digivice come out of the computer? then osamu put it away and blah blah, we know that story

but did you also know that ken was not intended by gennai and company to really get a digimon and digivice? in the wonderswan game Tag Tamers, we have this lovely little moment of Ken being accidentally dragged into the digital world and Gennai basically telling Ken to go sit at the kids table while the adults talked and fought milleniummon, this was before the world was literally torn into two pieces, very beginning of the game

ken happened to be there when they needed a new digikid to help fight, so they gave him wormmon and was like “congrats, you’re a chosen now”

so what does that mean about our original digivice?

it did not belong to ken, originally

it belonged to osamu, and he was meant to go into the digital world and find his partner

we know for a fact that digikids can borrow each other’s digivices to do things like evolve digimon, so that’s no biggie, ryou did that all the time because he never really received his own proper one until game 4 which was actually when he technically received a prototype digivice, based on his memories of the digivices he’s used before if i remember right

but that still means, osamu never went and found his partner, and that had to have happened BEFORE ryou went and fought Milleniummon, before Osamu died, and sometime around when the Summer Camp happened in Adv because that’s the only other time people were really getting digivices

ryou first fought milleniummon on new year’s eve of 1999, so that digi had to exist by then, and even with the time dilation between worlds, that’s a helluva long time from summer (july to august) to dead of winter, that’s plenty of time for a villain to emerge

especially

if they were already at Child level during Adventure

enter, DemiDevimon aka PicoDevimon, yes, the one that worked for Vamdemon, and yes, I know he died, there’s just one little thing about that. Milleniummon has a nasty habit of rebirthing fairly quickly. You know who else (usually) rebirthes quickly?

Partnered Digimon

so for this theory, we’re assuming that Vamdemon not only had Tailmon, Kari’s digi, under his claws, but also the Child, Adult, or Baby II forms of one of the partnered digimon that would eventually become Milleniummon

and then when demidevimon eventually rebirthed, he became a deltamon from spite. vamdemon can’t eat him now, he’s got three heads to chomp back with, aint nobody gonna crush him now

then he becomes kimeramon and one day fuses with a mugendramon and the rest is noted history

other reason i chose deltamon? throwback to that time ken used one for a trick

so that’s the kimeramon line, moving onto the mugendramon line

and yes, it is implied to be the Dark Masters one

the main thing I wanted for this line was machines, and most importantly, airdramon and metal koromon, why? metal koromon to counter taichi’s normal koromon. airdramon as a shoutout to Ken’s favorite mode of transportation

“but Essie, why are both lines so virus based”

because for one line, their human partner died, wanna guess which line I’m gonna say is Osamu’s? I’m giving him the Mugendramon line, partially because of all the tech, but mostly because Mugendramon was dying when he fused with kimeramon if I remember that trivia bit right

(EDIT: i remembered the trivia bit wrong, it was kimeramon dying, whatever, i still want mugen for osamu)

and we know one thing about when osamu died, it was either a few months before or after october 1999, august 1999 aka summer is only 2 months before that, and that’s about when the Dark Masters all died

and for the other line, there had to be a REASON why despite being a chosen kid, despite being the kid of miracles, ryou was denied entry to the digital world until they needed to kill his partner

and you and i both know there’s some serious discrimination against virus types among chosen children, please, go ahead, check the wiki, how many of the adv crew had a virus digi

i’ll wait

until ken, basically all were vaccine/data types and digivolving to a virus was a big no-no

so let’s make the hero of justice’s digimon a virus, let’s make all of that trio’s digimon a virus, they can be isolated together, they’re disaster children anyway

[trashbinbackyard]

40-50 for kasia, trias n lilith?

If i time this right this will be the first thing you see on your dash

40. Do they like energy drinks? Coffee? Sugary food? Or can they naturally stay awake and alert?

You mean breakfast? Its three cups black coffee, softened by three cans of 5-hour energy. She has no problem staying up, this is just something she wasnt allowed to ingest while working as assassin

Coffee sure, one cup max, rest of the day it’s tea mostly. Not big on sweets but will share a milkshake with bailey.

She has this specific tea she drinks in the morning to get her up and going. Much stronger than human teas. It helps her focus and get the day started with routine

41. What’s their sexuality? What do they find attractive? Physically and mentally? What do they like/need in a relationship?

Pansexual demiromantic. If you’re interesting she’s most likely into you. She’s not that specific about physical stuff, but mentally, you gotta have a sense of mystery and fun. Has no fucking idea what she could possibly want from a relationship bc she’s not really emotionally mature

Pansexual through and through. They’re physically into someone who’s pretty much the polar opposite and has confidence about it. Mentally, people who are artistic (music, dance, art, sewing, woodworkinh,doesn’t matter) they’re super into creative types, fun and relaxed earns bonus

Aro ace, also pretty sex repulsed.

42. What are their goals? What would they sacrifice anything for? What is their secret ambition?

She wants to prove herself, and become a good person. She killed and would die for krea at this point, help get justice served

Get a stable job? Check. Get married? In progress. There’s not really anything they’d sacrifice Everything for, they believe in compromice. When the baby fever hit they were ready to talk themselves out of it if bailey wouldn’t be on board

Grow her name on this part of the galaxy, gain influence around the citadel and the black market. Right now she’s content working for mhairi, but she’d like to grow her status to be working With mhairi

43. Are they religious? What do they think of religion? What do they think of religious people? What do they think of non religious people?

Not really. Terenlasi are raised atheistic. She’s not that knowledgable about religion. But doesn’t condem it eitheir. If that’s what brings some people comfort, good for them

A little, they were raised orthodox but consider themselves agnostic, as they dont really lean into the spiritual stuff. Appreciates the community tho

Her people have few traditions and since she’s far from home she’s keen on keeping those. Not too religious, but a bit spiritual. She does her own thing and lets other people do theirs. Her religion is none of anyone’s business and neither are other’s hers

44. What is their favourite season? Type of weather? Are they good in the cold or the heat? What weather do they complain in the most?

She likes a nice dry heat , she’s pretty much a walking cooler. So she outperforms in hot weather rather than in cool. Wont complain, whatever weather she has to endure is better than the dull lurking in citadel she did

They like spring the best, not too cool not too hot, all the flowers are blooming and they can slowly bust out their summer looks. Wille whine and moan during summer, someone help them

She likes warm and humid, much like nedians, although she doesn’t freeze up in cold weather. During unfortunate seasons she just stays in space, problem solved

45. How do other people see them? Is it similar to how they see themselves?

Criminal, traitor, turncoat, and she has earned it, she’s not denying it. But she beats herself more than any judging pair of eyes can ever. She has learned a new emotion! Guilt! Not fun! She feels pretty worthless after causing a ton of misery

People probably look at them and be like ”yeah, you do you boo” or be obnoxious like ”did all those piercing huuuuurt”. They like how they look, really, it was hard road recovering from ed but worth it

Tall lady, huge, wow, mhairi impersonator but skinnier. Bc you know, tall white fish species. Please dont compare two bad bitches to each other. She’s her own person, even though the social circle is causing her an identity crisis

46. Do they make a good first impression? Does their first impression reflect them accurately? How do they introduce themselves?

The most of her first impression are her falling chaotically onto the street. Not that good. Her opening her mouth doesn’t improve the situation one bit. She’s the prisoner of her bad social skills

They’re bubbly, they’re giddy, they’re happy to meet new people.

She’s stern and professional, she’s confident and demanding of respect. Keeping the tone neutral as not to give away too much about herself, she’s got years of experience

47. How do they act in a formal occasion? What do they think of black tie wear? Do they enjoy fancy parties and love to chit chat or loathe the whole event?

They were never invited to parties. Not her fault. Assassins just weren’t. She has no idea what tf is going on. For once she’d be quiet and standing on the corner looking like an idiot

Oh they love the fancyness. Not for themselves, but it is an aesthetic. But they like smaller cocktail parties of just hanging around

She’s well familiar with big fancy parties, making connections easily and scanning the room. She quite enjoys them

48. Do they enjoy any parties? If so what kind? Do they organise the party or just turn up? How do they act? What if they didn’t want to go but were dragged along by a friend?

Turn up at local nightclubs, that’s the place she can let loose without looking like total dimwit

They like parties and mingling but have their limit, by 9 pm they’re heading home already, they know what they’re comfortable with

She always turns up in big events. With the crew of valac even if they’re not invited, they got a cover

49. What is their most valued object? Are they sentimental? Is there something they have to take everywhere with them?

Krea’s cloak he gave her, everything else may burn in a fire and it wouldn’t matter

The piercings and tattoos are enough, they hold value to them and tell a part of her recovering story

Her parents were dear to her, still are (they aint dead dw). She had a little charm she sometimes uses as a necklace from them

50. If they could only take one bag of stuff somewhere with them: what would they pack? What do they consider their essentials?

Cloak, at least 8 knives (who knows maybe she’ll need more), a clean set of clothes, personal hygiene stuff

Few sets of clean clothes, personal hygiene + makeup, sketchbook and pencilcase, a book

Clean clothes hygiene all that jazz. Tracker, gun, knife,

[cinnbar-bun]

Granblue Fantasy Idea

Everything is the same except Djeeta and Gran are rappers known as Djee. Cypher and G. Cypher respectively. 

Djeeta: YO YO YO YO YA KNOW ITS YOUR GIRL DJEE CYPHER HITTIN UP THEM QUESTS AT AN UNGODLY HOUR

Gran: EVERY DAY I GRIND FOR MY WAIFUS. FIGHTIN’ ALL DAY FROM SPARK TO FINISH. 

Djeeta: REDUCE, UPGRADE, AND SAVE, I BE POPPIN THEM ELIXIRS LIKE SANDY MAKES HIS COFFEE. EVERY DAMN MINUTE

Gran:  WHYD YOU LEAVE ME DAD? ESTALUCIA, MORE LIKE EXTRA-LOSIN MY MIND- DON’T EVEN KNOW HOW LONG IVE BEEN PLAYIN-

Djeeta: GOT NO MONEY IN MY NAME JUST A FEATHER FROM LUCIFER. DONT MATTER WHO IT IS, I BEAT THEM WITH MY MULTIPLIERS. 

Gran: WHATEVER YOU DO, JUST DONT CALL BELIAL!

Djeeta: AINT NO MATTER WHAT IVE BEEN THROUGH IM DISHING OUT JUSTICE WITH MY GRAND CREW! SHOUT OUT TO ALL THREE HUNDRED OF MY HUSBANDS IN THE BACK I KNOW YOU WANNA-

Katalina: *covering Lyria’s ears while unplugging the speakers.* You have been stopped. 

[fortress-of-iserlohn]

so like. i got into logh fandom and my otp by haunting chn fics (eng ones are so RARE like what guys i’m so sad) and i swear i started out in the reinhard/yang camp but somewhere along the lines i accidentally tripped and fell into reuenthal/yang and NOW I CAN’T GET OUT - don’t help me i’m happily gone.

(but no pls come talk to me i’m so lonely why is no one else i know in this fandom SCREM ;A;)

mind you, all i have canon knowledge of is like. 47 chapters of the fujisaki manga + 3 episodes of DNT & 50 pages of the first translated novel. so uh. i apologise very sincerely to everyone else in this fandom. (but i friggen love DNT yang with his not-so-subtle shade and school boy pout, lemme love you sweetheart. also reuenthal in the manga is A+++++++++ FINE. and mittermeyer is a giant puppy and their hysterical interactions GIVE ME LIFE. i’m all over that like cats on expensive kibble man)

anyway, so there’s me. and my tiny one person raft and i wished so hard that i could draw because like. ARTISTS ARE AMAZING. but i can’t so here have some dodgy ass writing.

i have like. 9k of backstory but i got tired of writing it ??????? slice of life aint my thing bro.

spoilers for the original series below but you probably don’t care LMAO so in reality i’m just cutting it to save your dash.

basic premise is that it’s brain ship AU fic (i’m trash leave me to my can pls) where some of the empire cast (well just reuenthal + mittermeyer ok, the TWIN PILLARS AW YIS) live approx 200 years after the alliance cast did (yang and reinhard still got into their super epic fights as per original time line etc). but as per canon when the THING happens and them creepy earthy church people try to assassinate yang, schonkoff (I HATE SPELLING THEIR NAMES OKAY) finds him in time and tries to rush him to the hospital. but however, because the alliance superiors are dickwads, instead of trying to y’know, save his life, they decided to take the opportunity to upload yang’s consciousness into his ship so that he can continue to fight the war (INDEFINITELY NOW) and then when it WORKS like a motherfreaking miracle, yang wakes up, is silent for about 5 minutes taking everything in and then is kinda like ‘yeah nah’ and promptly runs away into space to chug through history files and drink virtual tea until like. 200 years later, when reunethal picks him up randomly (on the side of a space highway LOL) when yang’s taking whatever a brainship’s equivalent of a nap is but reuenthal obvs doesn’t know that the hyperion is a brainship so \o/ (yang, also a giant troll, decides to let him do whatever. it’s been a long 200 years ok).

it was going to be a long 20k epic where they play chess, overthrow the empire in favour of some form of XXcracy and ~fall in love~ along the way, all that GOOD shit. but i have zero patience and probably am never going to finish it so.

this is literally the first thing i’ve written in about 1.5 years (since i saw star wars oh my god) because my attention span for fandoms and everything else in general TBH is about zero ohoho. 

It was late, but Oskar couldn’t sleep, something restless buzzing at the back of his mind. Whether it was from a combination of the uneasy atmosphere from the crew currently on board, or his irritation at their willingness to jump at a mere ghost story, he wasn’t clear. His chronometer told him that he was due on bridge in about four hours, which was when he decided to give up on sleep entirely and perhaps take a quick walk around the still unfamiliar vessel.

He pushed his arms through his overcoat and exited his temporary quarters. He assumed it had belonged to the long dead fleet admiral of this craft, but there was a scarcity of personal effects that implied that he either hadn’t much down time at all, or wasn’t the type to care much about his decor.

Beyond the physical chess set carved from what looked like real ivory and the few volumes of rare paper books scattered about, there was not much to do in there at any given time.

He strode down the hallway, boot heels clicking gently against the metal floor. He wandered without much of a real purpose, distracted by random bits and pieces and by organising his thoughts from the day, so he could probably be forgiven for finally looking up when he arrived at a dead end and having absolutely no idea where he was.

To call it a dead end wasn’t actually completely true. There was a glimmer of light beneath the wall just to his right, a little bit of feeling about put his hand on a metal door, exactly the same colour and built to close at exactly the same depth as the wall.

The rebels sure were weird in some aspects, Oskar thought, tapping at the side of the wall where he expected the control panel to be. He wasn’t disappointed when the door hissed open quietly to allow him entry.

He only managed a couple of steps forwards before his feet just stopped. This room was nothing but a giant observatory, monitors bigger than any he had ever seen on a ship that did nothing but reflect outside back in. The galaxy and stars spun in a kaleidoscope of colours, whirling around him as the massive flagship flew through space, cutting through the darkness with ease.

He stared, lifting his gaze up, just to watch the splendor of space. It was completely different to his favourite spot on the Tristan, and definitely, the view from there couldn’t hold a light to this. He doubted any ship’s could.

“It’s beautiful isn’t it?” an unfamiliar voice said from somewhere to his left.

Oskar’s hand instinctively went to his hip, where his firearm would usually sit. However, having thrown his clothes on absently in the middle of the night, he had forgotten to slide it into its holster before heading out.

He braced himself grimly. He knew every single person who was currently on this ship, and this voice was not one he recognised at all. He cursed himself for being too distracted by a pretty view instead of securing the room first.

Oskar let his cool gaze sweep the room in a casual sort of manner for a second before he finally spotted the figure standing right up against a massive screen to his left hand side.

The person, a man from his voice and figure, was turned towards him, hands held up as if surrendering. “Sorry, sorry. It’s been so long since -” He cut himself off and slowly walked towards Oskar, hands tucked in his pockets. “Anyway, I don’t mean you any harm, Rear Admiral Reuenthal.”

Oskar kept his weight balanced on the balls of his feet in case of a sudden fight. “You know who I am,” he commented, keeping his voice calm and disinterested.

The man was close enough for Oskar to pick out some details now - tousled dark hair, a double breasted blue coat. His eyes caught on the gleaming gold pin on the man’s lapel, lit for one brilliant moment by a passing star, showing the clear detail of a single line bisecting the pin from left to right, and a solitary gold pentagram sitting proudly in the middle.

An uncomfortable prickle slowly crawled up Oskar’s spine as he remembered his crew whispering about disembodied footsteps and glimpses of shadows turning in hallways.

“Well,” the Rebel Fleet Admiral said, taking a hand out from his left pocket to slide through his already messy hair. “I do tend to make it a habit to know who’s on my ship.”

He seemed to notice Oskar’s unease and stopped, still several steps away. Oskar could tell now that the other man was a head or so shorter and his bearing was very clearly not military, even if his uniform and rank insignia said otherwise.

“Oh,” he seemed to realise something, rubbing the back of his head in a sheepish manner. “Sorry, that’s very rude of me. Julian used to always go on about how I should make it a habit to introduce myself first.”

He smiled then, a warm curve of his lips, and his dark eyes lit up, glittering with stars just like the galaxy behind him. “My name is Yang Wenli. Welcome aboard my ship, the Hyperion.”

[thekoogler-blog]

The Koogler Watches Comic Con Trailers 2018

Comic Con Trailer

Glass.

I’ll be honest, not too concerned about this one. I feel like this trilogy should have been like a duology. Split could have been like a 20 min lead in to Glass. Like he takes the girls, there’s a montage of all his personalities, the little rascal, ms doubtfire, or maybe she was more professor mcgonagall. And then there was like his demon one who could bend bars or whatever. He’s fully demon now like climbing the walls like a cricket demon. So I’m trying to figure out the twist from the trailer, and I guess the twist is going to be this is all in their heads. Or the twist is that they’re like actually heroes and villains and then they need to save the world. The twist is that there will be a 4th movie. They’re going to wring this out and try and get one last movie out of it. Plus it has pouty face Sarah Paulson in it, I’ll probably catch this one on the VOD or something. I’ve never seen the whole movie of Unbreakable but I got the key points. Willis survives the crash, he’s unbreakable and Jackson is super breakable. He’s like the guy from SpongeBob the chocolate episode. I won’t lie, when he fell down those steps, I kind of laughed, which is like some hidden superpower that I have. I can’t get through Precious without cracking up at least three times. But anyway…….

Koogler Scale of Watchability: Three MeowMeowBeenz

 AQUAMAN

I feel like I don’t have to say much about this. I know the immense intense hate that some of the DC universe has for it. Mostly just the DCEU, the animated bit is good. The comics are good. The games are good. The movies, to me, are good too. Look, we didn’t have any of these movies, none, now we have them all over the place. I agree that we need quality over quantity, but on the DC side, we are just getting started. Let’s give it a chance. Now to the trailer. Man oh man. I’m digging the visuals. The inevitable war scene looks good. The giant jellies, the SEA TURTLES (side note, I love sea turtles. SO FUGGIN MAJESTIC), the deep sea monsters and riding sharks and sea horses and shig. DOOOOOOPE. I’m a big fan of under the ocean life in general so I’m here for all of it. They fixed the speaking thing from JL where they had to conjure a water bubble to talk, they just talk. Favorite part of this whole trailer, the sharks willing to just destroy the entire aquarium to help little AC. One thing I’m not too fond of, that red hair of Mera. And I do see the similarities of this and BP. But, there’s room for both. Always has been, always will be. I’m looking forward to seeing this because I want to see if maybe this is somehow going to set up Legion of Doom. We have the Joker, Lex, and Deathstroke, add in Manta with Cheetah coming in and then possibly Black Adam sometime in the future. I’d like to see Reverse Flash get added into this somewhere as well but hopefully DC pulls this off with all the shakeups. I’m just hoping its not going to be too heavy on the puns and one liners and what not. Arthurs transition from the surface world to becoming the king of Atlantis was no laughing matter and I hope that comes through on the screen.

Koogler Scale of Watchability: Five MeowMeowBeenz

  Shazam!

Yes BOYEEEEEEEE. As per usual with the DCEU, people have a lot of complaints, but I’m here for this one as well. Kid in a superhero body came through in the trailer and I’m looking forward to it. This is one movie that needs to have that light and breezy funny and easy touch. Billy is a foster kid down on his luck, home to home, who just got the gift of a lifetime. Needs to be funny and goofy, but have the action of MOS. Shazam and whoever he is fighting need to be slingin each other all over the place and what not. I like the suit and everything, but the lightning on the chest looks more like a night light than anything else. But you don’t really get much other than a quick intro to Shazam. Tells you the gist of who he iis. Meets the Wizard, says the name, now he is Shazam. Just like I was talking about with Aquaman with the LOD filling out, for the next one, the Justice League should be filling out as well. Now is the time to plant the seeds for it. Lex needs to be in the background of all of this plotting and scheming with Deathstroke putting his team together to take on the League. Maybe do the JLA: Doom storyline but have Lex in the driver seat instead of Vandal Savage. Yeah, yeah, that could work

Koogler Scale of Watchability: Five MeowMeowBeenz

 Godzilla: King of Monsters

So, I won’t lie, I know nothing about anything Godzilla other than what I learned from the Godzilla 2000. I think I saw pieces of the one released before this, but not much. I don’t remember if he fought a monster or not, but. This looks ok, but ONLY IF Godzilla is fighting all of these monsters. Also, Clair de Lune in the trailer. That gets two BIG THUMBS up from me. And it sounds like Vera Farmiga is going to be a bad guy somehow. Cuz Friday Night Lights coach and Millie BB don’t seem to like her. It looks like we’re going to see Mothra, and I’m guessing Rodan and the three headed one….Golgon? I don’t know names. I saw the moth one, there was a flying fire one, and the three headed one. Looks like its going to be a more dramatic world smasher. You don’t play Clair de Lune in a movie that is a bit classy

Koogler Scale of Watchability: Four MeowMeowBeenz

 Fantastic Beasts: The Crimes of Grindelwald

You guys…..you guys you guys……you……guys. When I hear that music and I see those towers. You know the music that I’m talking about. Even though Harry isn’t here anymore that sense of wonder and magic still pulls you in. It still makes you want to watch WHATEVER they put out. Its great stuff, it really is. But this is about to give us a little glimpse into the world young Dumbledore, some of his humble beginnings. We get some returning faces along with some new ones. I personally can’t wait to see this and Nicholas Flamel. I mean….I feel we’re getting deep into some of the things we kind of just glossed over in the original series. I can’t wait. I’ll see this alone if need be because I’m always ready to dive back into the Wizarding World. I’d like a movie on the founders of Hogwarts to be honest, there has to be a story there. Right? RIGHT!!!! I just want more stories and more books and more all of it.

Koogler Scale of Watchability: Six MeowMeowBeenz

 The Walking Dead Season 9

So…..Rick is an old man now. Yes, there will be a time jump I suppose, and I still need to catch up because the last episode I saw was Carl getting bit and dying in a sewer. Do I care that much about that to stop watching the show? No. Will I catch up? Yes. Do I know what’s about to happen? Yes. Everyone seems to be living in harmony. The last of the Saviors, the bad ones at least seem to be gone. The Sanctuary, Kingdom, and the Hilltop, along with the trash people, seem to be living in harmony. But, there’s some cracks in the armor. The people seem to maybe not be getting along together. Some don’t want to be in a big group and others don’t want to play nice with each other. I mean, you had to expect that this would come, the Saviors did some messed up shig to everyone and forgiving them aint gonna be as easy as 1, 2, 3. This is also the fabled season of Rick and Maggie leaving I think. There is a shot of some boots walking with blood dripping down. I wager Rick is going to get but of course and die or whatever and Maggie or Michonne is taking over. And maybe the feud between Darryl and Rick is going to boil over. My man Dan Fogel looks like he’s going to play a part in this. Maybe he’s a Whisper. Who knows. But I will watch it, but I have to watch half a season, plus Preacher is on so I’m gonna fit this shignattle in here somewhere. I won’t lie, after the whole meeting with Negan where he first arrived, I gotta say my interest in TWD has waned from about 100 to a 90, maybe an 89. But I’m still fully on the wagon.

Koogler Scale of Watchability: Four MeowMeowBeenz

 Disenchantment

I don’t know. I don’t know. I don’t know if I dreamed this maybe, but didn’t they try this already with another Matt Groening show that didn’t work out. But I hear Abbi, I hear Keegan, not sure who the goblin person is, but I like all the stuff. Most of the stuff so I’ll watch and take a quick sneakle peekle and see if it keeps my interest.

Koogler Scale of Watchability: Two MeowMeowBeenz

 Titans

Yall. This one gon be zoppity. These are no longer Teen Titans. These are just straight up Titans as evidenced by the trailer giving the the large TV MA right in the beginning. With Raven being such a central part of the trailer, you already know who’s coming to dinner. That’s right, I know my boy Trigon is going to be making an appearance, how, when, and in what capacity, we don’t know. But, I’m anxious to see it. The core crew from the show is there, Robin, Star, Raven, and Beast Boy, but I’m guessing in this universe, Cyborg has been drafted to the JL and they are getting two new additions, Hawk and Dove, played by Thad Castle and ARods ol girl. The one thing I’m really anxious to see, just what the hell did Batman do to make Robin that….damn…mad. Because there is an episode here called Jason Todd, so this whole I’m kinda Jason Todd but I’m also Dick is gone. He’s got a real grudge against the Bat in this one with the standout line from the trailer

“Fuck Batman”

I mean, I’m in. Plus add in the fact that Jason Todd will be mentioned in the show, throw in the Doom Patrol, and Wonder Girl. I’m getting more of a Young Justice vibe (great comic by the way), from this than anything. With just a splash of adultness. I mean Robin really stepped on that guys face pretty friggin hard

Koogler Scale of Watchability: Five MeowMeowBeenz

 There were other trailers that I didn’t mention, Arrow, the Flash, the Orville, Black Lightning, Yeah, I’m not caught up on these either so I didn’t watch because I don’t know what happen with Flash and the Thinker. I don’t know what happened with the Arrow crew Diaz or Dominguez or whatever his name is. And I don’t know what happened with Black Lightning and Tobias Church. Hoping they didn’t kill him because I like him.