#they would've continued building that life and he would always have grieved but it would have been very different. we saw how he was w them | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

septembersghost · 4 years

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a few weeks ago, I was talking to @elliotschafer about S6 and the Braedens (and I would absolutely not have pulled this from the vault were it not for Polina wanting to read it), and the terrible sadness that underpins their story, and it unearthed the memory that basically one of the only pieces I ever wrote and willingly posted - that was actual story and wasn't reflection or fractured glimpses of narrative or poetry or meta specifically about Dean (as there are so many of those posts scattered all around the internet like petals) - was about them, ten years ago. (I was deeply upset by the memory erasing, which...remains.) anyway, I decided to dig it up out of its grave. the date on this was May 23, 2011, which is...wild. I didn't change a word, for better or worse, it’s exactly as it was in the document from a decade ago.

I was also apparently listening to "Trust Me" by The Fray (I entitled the journal entry "looking for something I've never seen"), if you really want a throwback mood, and MORE things the universe mocks and weaves together for me, because I pulled up the lyrics on Genius and it says: Release Date - September 13, 2005

of course it does. of course, what else could it possibly be? I hear you, fate, I know. (waving to my little self of 10 years ago, not sure if this song is about Dean anymore or if it's about me. it's probably both, it usually is.)

If I say who I know, it just goes to show You need me less than I need you Take it from me, we don't give sympathy You can trust me, trust nobody But I said you and me, we don't have honesty The things we don't wanna speak I'll try to get out, but I never will Traffic is perfectly still

We're only taking turns Holding this world It's how it's always been When you're older, you will understand And then again, maybe you don't And then again, maybe you won't

the thing is, the way I concluded this at the time, as I was fumbling around for some semblance of hope - because that's my brand, it's what I do - I forgot I ended it the way I did. it's likely not been read since I initially posted it, so I forgot...the way I left it. that I would have no idea the added poignancy it would have, all this time later. Dean just has a way of doing that, gleaming by accident, an ember that sparks into a flame and burns on, long after he’s walked over and out of the threshold.

(additionally tagging @someoneoffthestreet, @laurelwinchester, and @deandaydreams, bc you are all with me in my deanlisa emotions hive, and I may as well embarrass myself thoroughly! no pressure to read it though, and of course anyone who wants to is welcome to. 🤍)

look at my icon from back then! I can’t believe this is still active:

(the note is from the original entry too)

Note: This is probably the only fic that will ever get posted here, so I'm not quite sure how to introduce it. Memories are an interesting concept - they make us who we are, they help us grow. They move us forward and hold us back. They fill us with fear and with hope. The idea of losing them is unsteady ground. Would we really want to erase events, even painful ones, just for peace of mind? Would we ever want to forget someone we loved? And what if the choice was entirely out of our hands? All of these things were haunting me following the S6 finale of SPN ("Let It Bleed" in particular), and Friday night, this grew out of that idea.

Fragments. Lisa wasn’t in the hospital for long. Her injuries hadn’t been serious. Lucky, the doctors said. A nurse picked up her chart, flipped through the pages, frowned. Mention of a stab wound casually jotted amongst the notation on minor soft tissue impacted by the accident. Obviously, someone had made a mistake. It wasn’t even enough to cause concern. The nurse handed her the forms, she signed them, and her son wheeled her out, through sterile white corridors, the smell of antiseptic and latex gloves burning her nose. Ben was uncharacteristically quiet. Something about the car accident had him shaken. She tried to reassure him. After all, they were fine. But a nearly imperceptible whisper in the back of her mind left her uneasy. It wasn’t anything she could define. It was that feeling you get when you’ve left a light on in an empty house – nagging, persistent. Unsettling. Certain details of the situation didn’t add up. For one, their car hadn’t been damaged. Hell, their car was still at home. In the garage. And they were miles away. Not far enough to cause real alarm, not past state lines, but far enough for it not to make sense. A friend from work had to pick them up in front of the hospital, and when they were asked how it happened, neither of them could answer. The man who had hit them disappeared into the night. No report was filed. If it wasn’t for the aching all over her body and the tenderness in her side, there would be no indication of an accident at all. Her friend told her gravely that Matt had died. It was unexpected, he had also suffered a freak accident. “How horrible,” Lisa said, but she wasn't acquainted with anyone named Matt. Her friend muttered something about shock or temporary amnesia, looked at her kindly, and the subject was dropped. When they got home, they found a living room window broken, along with a chair in Ben's room and other odds and ends. Nothing was missing, though. It didn’t even look like a break-in. It was strange, like everything else had been strange. She called a repair man, the window was fixed, and the house became as ordinary as it had ever been. When Ben nearly cut his foot on a shard of glass embedded in the rug, she practically destroyed that patch of floor, vacuuming it incessantly and digging at it with her fingernails, as if something else was buried there. When she realized this erratic behavior was scaring her son, she pulled herself together. What the hell was going on? She felt like her entire brain was bruised. Work had given her a couple of days off to recover, and she let Ben stay home from school with her. It felt like they both needed a little time, even though there was no clear medical necessity. She took hot baths. Ben played video games. She made spaghetti for dinner and he silently helped her clear the plates. He smiled at her and said an “I love you, Mom,” before she sent him off to bed. And when the time to recoup was over, their schedules settled back in, like clockwork. It was fine. It was normal. It was the life they’d always had, wasn’t it? A week later, she sat in front of the mirror in her room, brushing out her hair. It took twenty minutes before she realized she hadn’t stopped. There was absolutely nothing wrong. That was the problem. When she crawled into bed, she felt incredibly alone. She went to the closet and pulled out an extra pillow. She had no idea why it was even there, but she suddenly wanted it. It smelled like a mixture of Old Spice, whiskey, and strong soap. A hint of cinnamon, tang of ashes. It was a stranger’s smell. Yet she clung to it, the way she’d clung to her stuffed rabbit when she was a child. Something in her desperately wanted to cry, but she held it in. There was no explanation for tears. It was another two days before she found the shotgun. This detail filled her with an immediate sense of fear. Under no circumstances should there have been a shotgun in the damn closet. She’d never even been this close to a shotgun before. Had she? The sight of it was dreadful, but she didn’t quite know how to get rid of it. The solution was to hide the firearm in the back of the hall closet and forget it was there. And she did. She found Ben in his room, listening to his iPod. He pulled out the earbuds when she entered, and something led her to pick it up. He was listening to Zeppelin. What kid his age listened to classic rock? When she asked who had recommended it, he honestly responded that he didn’t know. Like the pillow, and the shotgun, she let it go. They were simply loose threads. That’s when the dreams started. They were nothing at first. A face in her crowded subconscious. When she started seeing it more clearly, the face began to stay with her. In her waking hours, she realized it was the man from the hospital. The guy who’d hit them. The one who’d disappeared. He was nothing to her. She’d barely had a fleeting glance from the hospital bed. But the face…the face wouldn’t leave her. It became a minor obsession. She called the hospital and requested the records, but there was no mention of him anywhere. The nurses had no recollection of a man even being there. She asked Ben if he could remember the man’s name, but he couldn’t. He only had one vivid memory of the man – "You take care of your mom." He hadn’t even come past the threshold of the door, but she remembered. She remembered the cadence of his voice. She remembered the way he smiled at her, intimately, with so much inexplicable sadness buried underneath. She remembered he looked like he hadn’t slept in a year. She remembered the exact shade of green in his eyes, and how they crinkled at the edges. She remembered the freckles scattered across the bridge of his nose. She remembered he was beautiful. Frankly, she started to wonder if she was losing her mind. She found a shirt buried in a drawer that smelled like the stranger pillow. She laid next to it and finally cried. She cried for hours. She cried until her eyes were raw and her breath was coming in short, stabbing gasps. She cried every single dream, every single flash of an image, every bit of that scent, every syllable of the voice, right out of her body. That was when she forgot altogether. It took another four months for her to find the shoebox. She was rummaging in the top of that same hall closet, the one harboring the fugitive shotgun, in search of an umbrella, in case she needed it the next morning. Rain was slamming against the window panes, the wind was causing tree branches to scrape the glass like phantom fingernails in the dark. A slam made her jump and her flying hand hit the lightbulb, smashing it against the wall. The remains tinkled to the floor softly. Frustrated, she got the dustpan, a stool, and a new bulb. Slivers of glass were swept carefully up and discarded. Standing on the stool, she replaced the broken bulb, and the light from the new one seemed too bright, almost harsh, like sunlight flooding a room that hasn’t been occupied for a long time. She blinked twice before stepping off her perch, and saw the box, tucked away on the top shelf. Something tugged at her memory, and she brought the box down with her. She carried it gingerly to the sofa, as if she was afraid it would explode. She stared at it, lightly tracing the design on the lid with her fingertips. It took her a couple of minutes to decide she was being ridiculous and lift the lid. The scent hit her immediately. The same scent. The pillow, the shirt. Her heart immediately began beating much too quickly. On top was a necklace, a simple charm on a silver chain, something that looked like it would be given in affection. There was a spare car key. The bottom rattled, and she found a few extra bullets. She removed one and held it in her palm, where it felt unnaturally cold. She shivered and dropped it back in its place. Nestled between these metal items, which seemed like symbols of both protection and danger, was an envelope. One of those cheap grocery store envelopes they used when they developed photographs. Gingerly, she pulled it out. She lingered at the flap. Mystery photographs didn’t seem like a good idea. But it was too late not to look. First, there were she and Ben, pulling faces at the camera. Then, one of her alone, sitting on the porch steps. Her own expression was foreign to her, something out of a life she'd never experienced. It made her afraid, and it hurt in a way that she didn’t understand. Then she got to the next picture, and there he was. The boyish grin, the green eyes, the freckles, all of it. The face that had abruptly stopped haunting her dreams was suddenly staring directly at her. The next picture was of the two of them. His arm was around her shoulders. There were pictures of he and Ben. There were pictures of Ben in his truck. This man that had never existed was suddenly all too real. The final photograph in the bunch was of the three of them, smiling, sitting close together, looking like…like a family. Looking complete. The kind of family she and Ben had never quite had. It didn’t make sense. There wasn’t a part of her that could logically comprehend any of this. But every fiber of her being told her it was right, every throb of her heart in her own ears told her what it meant. She took the photo and put it in a frame, and she put the frame on a table, in amongst class pictures of Ben and shots of she and her sister. If she knew anything, she knew it belonged there. She never remembered who he was, nor did Ben. There was no context, no name. Only fragments scattered around the house, cast adrift like little ghosts. They never discussed him. Not really. There wasn’t enough of anything tangible to discuss. There was no reason for the sense of comfort his face gave them. There was no reason, but he became an unspoken talisman, something to believe in. In the corners of their memories and the deepest parts of their souls, he was there. Somehow, he had existed. And he reminded them to live.

#literally took myself out with the last two sentences and they are the sole reason i am posting this #dean winchester #lisa braeden #ben braeden #dean x lisa #deanlisa #when i picture myself happy #supernatural #*#(there are other people i could tag in this but i don't like annoying everyone with my bad writing so know you're here in spirit ♥)#also bc of the absolutely horrific post that was going around about her the other day bc my god she deserves better than this fandom #as does dean the majority of the time given...some of what people write. that post was. ghoulish? i don't even know. idk anymore #friendly reminder that she was a safe harbor and a source of kindness/reason and in no way shape or form deserved what happened #their relationship was flawed and it was fragile and it was doomed because the narrative required it by necessity #but a universe exists where we could have left him there and it would've been more than a tenuous year #they would've continued building that life and he would always have grieved but it would have been very different. we saw how he was w them #when lisa said: 'it wasn't greeting card perfect but we were in it together' and the way he calls their house a 'home'#can anyone ever truly ask for more than that?#can anyone ever ask for more than someone who sees you in despair and still opens their door and arms anyway?#she doesn't demand anything (even though he practically begs her to) and she's an autonomous person. what they experience is real #and when she told him: 'you two have the most unhealthy tangled up crazy thing that i've ever seen.' it feels harsh but she's also right.#the way he calls her 'honey' when she's hurt and you realize he's probably called her that hundreds of times. we just didn't get to hear it #when becky (who i always want to call laurel <3) said in the post about them:#'they were in his bones. they were his family. the only way to get them out was to literally remove him from them like an amputation.'#'she was tangible evidence that dean was his own person with his own thoughts feelings and desires'#dean loves easily and he loves hard. we know that. he craved a home and we know that too.#he was fully capable emotionally and in every other way of living that life and he had decided to try #they were his only road out and for the very briefest time he had that and it mattered. losing them changed him in traceable ways #he chose to live. it was a moment in time but it was his. it was their moment in time.#i realize we're not supposed to think that but also i don't care and i do what i want :)

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jdrizzle15 · 3 years

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Her Second Return

Just like all of you, and especially my fellow Penny fans, I am absolutely devastated by the Volume 8 finale. I had been in quite a state these last few days, utterly heartbroken, and actually nauseous at times. It feels strange to me to be legitimately grieving a fictional character, but it’s not a bad thing to feel this way. To me, this just shows that CRWBY loves her just as much as us to have written her so well that we connect so completely with her, that it feels like we lost an actual piece of ourselves when she’s gone.

But as you can probably tell by the title, this mega post isn’t gonna be about accepting this end, not in the slightest! Today I want to share canon evidence that can point towards another return of our beloved quirky red headed cinnamon bun! I’m here to spread this hope that I and others in the Nuts & Dolts dolts Discord server have!

I have this separated into many different sections to keep these thoughts organized. With that said, here goes…

A Father’s Words:

In Episode 7 of Volume 7, ‘Worst Case Scenario’ we learn the origins of Penny’s aura, and thus her soul. We also learn that it takes more aura each time she’s brought back. This leaves open an option that could be used at a later point.

Many people theorized that Pietro could indeed revive Penny one more time, which he would absolutely do. But there also lies the possibility that someone else could donate some of theirs, I’m not sure about this as I feel like it’s akin to blood donation where compatibility matters or there's a high risk of altering her, but the possibility is definitely there.

Now, the conversation in Chapter 5 of Volume 8, ‘Amity’ that Pietro and Penny have is an important moment for both Father and Daughter. It was there to show how her death in PvP all that time ago really did have a heavy impact on him and is still affecting him to this day.

Instead of continuing to pretend that everything is A-okay, like he had done for most of Volume 7, he finally lets his true feelings about how it come out to Penny for what is quite likely the first time. Even going so far as to say "Are you asking me to go through that again?" when she offers to take the risk of trying to lift Amity with her power. He wants Penny to be able to live her life.

This entire scene with Pietro established “this is what will likely happen” even if circumstances are much different now, it doesn’t negate the fact that this is a key part of Penny’s story. Scenes like these have a purpose beyond simply making an eventual death all the more heart wrenching. Her never actually getting to live her life makes those scenes basically moot. It makes them effectively pointless from narrative point of view. Unless there's more to it.

Building Relationship:

The build up between Ruby and Penny the last two volumes has been absolutely phenomenal with a definite destination in mind, and this doesn’t feel like that destination. So much of the arc of this season was to help Penny. This girl that our main protagonist absolutely adores and treasures, it would just be awful to throw all of that out for what amounts to an avoidable end. Why use so much of their precious and very limited runtime on deliberately building up this relationship only to end it abruptly, and permanently, when they’re separated?

In my opinion, RT is definitely smarter now than to intentionally set up what was really looking like a budding gay relationship only to kill one of them for good. If N&D wasn't actually going in a romantic direction, why would they leave in all of the romance-adjacent stuff that they got, that's not how ‘just friends’ act. And that is not something you use such valuable time building up for absolutely no pay off whatsoever...

Representation of Hope:

At its core, RWBY has always been about hope. It’s not at the forefront the whole time, but there's been an underlying theme of hopefulness that has persisted since it began. Some describe the show as a Hopepunk, I personally find this to describe RWBY really well. This genre of storytelling is about caring for things deeply and the courage and strength it takes to do so. It’s about never submitting or accepting the way things are. Fighting for what you believe in and standing up for others. RWBY fits all of this extremely well. How does this relate to Penny? She has been shown to be a sign of hope for everyone, but especially for Ruby, the main main protagonist. A prerequisite for a Hopepunk story is the hope.

Her first death in V3 was something that fundamentally changed Ruby. For the first time in the series, we see our main character all but broken by this event. With the loss of Penny, immediately afterwards, Ruby’s hope followed. She made up for it through determination and force of will. We see it affect her multiple times throughout the journey to Volume 7. But upon her return in V7, Hope reached a high point for everyone, the sheer relief on Ruby’s face is plain to see!

In V8 chapter 5 ‘Amity’, Penny literally raises hope by lifting the arena into the sky so Ruby could spread her message. And when she falls, and Amity with her, the connection is lost and hope plummets again. From there things take a very negative turn with the hack begins to take Penny’s agency.

In chapter 11 ’Risk’ is the point in the arc where everyone is reunited for the moment, so two separate hero stories are no longer a thing at that point in time. For the time being focus seemed to be shifted to care about the characters and how they’re going to solve the current problems. This is also where Ruby reaches her lowest emotional point in the season.

It’s not huge, but it’s interesting how connected this is. Before Ruby and Yang share a good cry over learning the possible fate of Summer, Yang brings up restoring optimism and hope to Ruby after the younger sister storms out of the room in frustration. This is where Penny’s scenes take up the rest of the episode. Getting Penny back in control of her own body and safe again is what makes the ending of the episode much brighter, when just 5 minutes before Ruby had been distraught and scared. This then spills over into the group coming up with the plan to use the staff, putting the main group in a much better mood. Of all the things to go right, it’s interesting that it’s Penny.

Things go wrong with the plan in the end and Penny dies. I find it interesting that once again, Penny got them hopeful in their chances of doing something right. Given said plan succeeded but at the cost of Penny of all people, Penny is shown to be the beginning and end of hope for them

The highest and lowest points for hope seem to directly correlate to when Penny’s around. When she comes back again, hope will return too, just like it had before. And because she’ll likely be back for good this time, the second return will probably be close to when Ruby is nearing the complete abandonment of hope. This would be pretty par for the course of the show honestly.

A little aside, but in a sense, Penny also represents Unity. The CCT in Vale fell after her first death, knocking out global communications and the unifying connection it gave. When it was restored for the briefest moment, she was there. Her body connected so she could allow for its launch, her soul lighting the night to hold up Amity with every ounce of her strength. So of course when the Hack succeeds and she falls, she takes global comms down again with her. At a smaller scale - even at the Hack's second last attempt to control her, she draws everyone in the Schnee Manor together. At the start of the volume, Yang states the one thing that they all agree on is not surrendering Penny.

Unity seems appropriate for one whose first song and wish was for but one friend, who would go on to find so many more in the process, and permit for a moment the possibility of all Remnant becoming friends once more. Where she first died, the name of the episode devoted to her story - Amity, "friendship", from the Latin root amicus, "friend" - she almost lives and dies with the very possibility of a united Remnant. It's no wonder she's a priority target for Salem, the great divider, and it seems natural that her next restoration may very well allow the next bid to bring the world together.

The Void Screams:

Moments after Penny's death, we hear a weird scream in the void space. It was a guttural, pained, angry scream, almost like the void space itself was crying out. All the portals shuddered and flickered when it happened.

Some think that this scream was Salem returning, but that happens earlier than Penny’s death, her return is signaled with cinder's arm acting up. We know this because after the arm finished flailing uncontrollably, Cinder said triumphantly "she's back." If it were Salem screaming, it would have happened after she fixed herself, but it didn't.

And I doubt Cinder would have been surprised or unsettled by it considering she was happy Salem returned not long before it. And why would a Salem scream affect the portals anyway, she has no connection to the staff or it's magic.

Another thing to consider is the fact sound is not transmitted through the portals. Otherwise, they would've heard Oscar and the rest calling for them, or the screams of the citizens of Mantle and Atlas. This lowers the possibility of that scream being from Salem even further.

The sound really seems to be coming from something else entirely within the void, and that something is not at all happy. There’s also the fact that Penny was the only person who died in the void space, everyone else was just thrown out of it like Ruby and Co. The only logical cause to me is Penny. Her body was a product (or byproduct) of the same creation magic that made the void space, her blood seems to have been a trigger.

Now I can't be sure about it, but this makes me feel like Penny is almost a part of creation itself? For whatever this thing is to be so angry, that is the only explanation I can think of currently. But all of this could possibly relate to the Narnia allusion of 'the willing victim killed in a traitor's stead' that others have brought up, which will be covered next.

Narnia Parallels:

Atlas has several parallels and references to fictional places (putting aside real world ones like the United States). One of those is that of Narnia, both on the surface and on a deeper level. It is a land of winter year round, where people struggle to survive and there is a present divide between those loyal to the current Monarch and those who are not. James is a parallel to Jadis, the White Witch, a ruler whose thoughts and cares aren’t exactly centered around the actual well being of the people. The hologram table in Ironwood’s office is designed to look like stone, like the Stone Table which features prominently in the Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe. He has a handpicked cadre of special agents/secret police, like how Maugrim and his wolves served Jadis. Another key parallel is how Jadis’s winter sets in to oppress and kill everyone in Narnia, but the Witch provides aid and protection to her loyal followers. She has all the power to spare harm to others, and uses it only for the loyal. As soon as Mantle splits from James and Atlas, no care is taken to protect them from the cold of Solitas even though he has every ability to turn the heating grid back on. His protection is only for the loyal.

Now that the parallel is established, let's look into the details. Starting with how James plays the role of Jadis.

"I had forgotten that you are only a common boy. How should you understand reasons of State? You must learn, child, that what would be wrong for you or for any of the common people is not wrong in a great Queen such as I. The weight of the world is on our shoulders. We must be freed from all rules. Ours is a high and lonely destiny." These are the words Jadis says in the Magician’s Nephew to justify the blood civil war she and her sister had waged for rulership of Charn, before she came to Narnia. She won that war, technically, but only after the last battle had been lost and her sister had marched right up to her so that they were face to face. Jadis’s troops were dead, her followers had surrendered, and the capital was under full control of her sister. But, she still had one card, one ultimate play to win and prove the throne of Charn was rightfully her. The Deplorable Word, a piece of old magic that killed everyone and everything except for her on Charn. It was monstrous, senseless, cruel beyond measure. But it got her that hollow victory. This mindset, the disregard for the people except as tools for her own will, the ultimate ‘aoe’ destructive move that no one had even considered her using, the unwillingness to stop even when by all practical measures the war is over, is a shocking parallel to James. In many ways, he is Jadis in mindset and deed.

Then there is the shared desire for A Thing that both James and Jadis have. For James it’s the Winter Maiden and control over her. For Jadis it’s the Silver Apples from the Tree of Youth. And funnily enough, the Maiden Powers parallel the Apples quiet well. These apples grant power and a life of eternal beauty, but should not be taken or eaten on one’s own initiative. They must be given, a gift granted by another, or only suffering will come from obtaining them. "For the fruit always works — it must work — but it does not work happily for any who pluck it at their own will. If any Narnian, unbidden, had stolen an apple and planted it here to protect Narnia, it would have protected Narnia. But it would have done so by making Narnia into another strong and cruel empire like Charn, not the kindly land I mean it to be.” Jadis’s immortality, and some of her power, come from the fact that she ate an Apple of her own will after stealing her way into the garden where the Tree of Youth had been planted. She gained the eternal life she had wanted and the power along with it, but she did so by taking it and was cursed because of it. Her skin turned pale and her lips blackened as if she were a frozen corpse given life. She will be trapped in a life of misery and hate according to Aslan- oh hey Cinder, how’s having stolen the Power you always wanted working out for you? Cinder had the power she wanted, but she only got hungrier, eager to claim more and increase her might. But in her pursuit she was defeated and humiliated by Raven, had to steal her way out of Mistral, and then suffered defeat after defeat while in Atlas. Only in the end, when she didn’t keep pursuing the Maiden Power, did she get any kind of victory.

The reason these parallels to Narnia are so important is one of the most famous events of the series. The cracking of the Stone Table and the rebirth of Aslan after his death. ‘When a willing victim who had committed no treachery was killed in a traitor's stead, the Table would crack and Death itself would start working backward.’ Well, the ‘Stone Table’ in James’s office has cracked, and Penny strikes me as a pretty willing victim. She has never actually committed any actual treachery or harm, as she was the Protector of Mantle, and fought for its and Atlas’s people until the very end. And because of her death, the actual traitor, Winter, who loyally served James until he had gone too far, was saved. Through Penny’s self sacrifice, Winter was saved. So now Death itself will start working backward.

(Major props to my friend @catontheweb for writing this section, I was getting nowhere with it, if they weren't there this part wouldn't exist!)

Norse Mythology:

The tree we see in the post credit scene gives off some serious Yggdrasil vibes. Also called the World Tree, it is essentially all of creation in Norse Mythology. It connects all nine realms, including the God realms of Asgard, the human realm of Midgard, and the underworld of Hel.

Humans are born from the branches of Yggdrasil. The web of Wyrd is woven for every person once they're born, and their path is set from there regardless of how many times the souls cycle over. But at the end, they're destined to end up in one of the worlds, for a myriad of reasons.

I believe Penny landed closest to this giant tree. She was on the center platform in the void space, so if that space is directly above the island(?) the tree is on, it makes sense for her to fall by the center nearest to the tree. This would not only open up all kinds of possibilities for the volume in general, but it would also create options for Penny.

The whole of Yggdrasil’s representations fit well into Penny’s story. Birth, growth, death and rebirth. We can count Penny’s appearance in V7 as birth for now, her growth is all her development in leaving =the military and becoming a Maiden, her death just happened, and her rebirth would be her revival. And this is a cycle she’s gone through before.

The Norse god Odin and Yggdrasil have quite a connection. In one story, Odin cut out one of his own eyes to gain knowledge from a pool underneath Yggdrasil. The only one that fell whose eyes alone are incredibly significant to the story was Ruby. So, they could choose to have her allude to Odin by having Ruby make some kind of deal with whatever entity likely rules over this magical place. An eye for Penny’s life.

There’s another story about Odin, Yggdrasil and the pursuit of knowledge. Odin so loved knowledge, that he sacrificed himself in a quest to learn the deeper magic of runes. It was believed one could only learn the magic spells from runes in death. So, Odin hung himself on Yggdrasil for nine days as an offering, and teetered between life and death. After he mastered the last spell on the ninth night, he ritually died and all light was extinguished from the world. Odin’s death lasted until midnight, when he was reborn and light returned to the world.

This story doesn’t fit Penny perfectly, but allusions often don’t. So If she really did land near the tree, she could be another loose representation of Odin’s story here. What she did wasn’t for knowledge, but to save her friends and keep Cinder from getting the Winter Maiden power. She believed it necessary that she sacrifice herself to achieve this end. As we established, Penny represents Hope, so her death means the loss of hope. This parallels Odin’s story of his death meaning the loss of light itself. So if this theory holds up, it would make this death temporary, until her rebirth and the return of Hope with her once again.

Alternatively, Ruby has the potential of loosely representing Odin in this story as well. Odin later uses the knowledge of the runes to do many things, but the most relevant one right now is awakening the dead. Both of these stories are about making a personal sacrifice to gain something that is desired. Ruby would absolutely make such sacrifices if it meant saving Penny.

It is said that Odin lived “according to his highest will unconditionally, accepting whatever hardships arise from that pursuit, and allowing nothing, not even death, to stand between him and the attainment of his goals." This sounds like Penny's arc of accepting the WM powers. This is more just a general connection between Penny and Odin, but I found it interesting.

Side Note: I encourage anyone who’s interested to look into RWBY connections to Norse Myth, there’s a surprising amount of things that feel eerily similar to the show. Likely just coincidental, but it’s fun to think about!

(If I got any of this wrong, I sincerely apologize by the way. I researched as best I could, but I admit it could have been lacking.)

Ambrosius and the Staff:

Ruby told Ambrosius "we kinda wanna keep her around longer than that" as part of her very specific instructions. Then Penny died about ten to fifteen minutes, at the absolute most thirty minutes later in-universe. I don’t know about you, but to me that seems very short to be considered ‘longer than that’. Technically it is, but when writing a story and a character says something like that, you typically don’t just kill the character they were referring to basically right away. It makes sense for a week-by-week watch, but in a volume binge, which many viewers do, it becomes ironic how fast Penny dies after being removed from her robotic body.

The first time we see the staff of creation being used, it's to save Penny. Using the staff of creation to help Penny is a sign of how incredibly important she is.

They’ve even got this entire transformation sequence for her, so it wouldn’t make sense for them to throw all that away two episodes later. In a meta context, it’s a massive waste of time and budget considering the asset creation for Penny.

Penny is a character who has already hopped bodies two times. And now we're supposed to just believe that this time it really is a final death? Just two episodes after we were explicitly told her body isn't what matters, that "Her soul is who she is" and that "the mechanical parts are just extra"? From a writing perspective, it feels strange, like your breaking a promise right after making it. And frankly, CRWBY is better than that, which makes me think this is not the actual end for her.

A possible connection between Penny, Ruby, and the Staff (thus Creation) can be seen in the intro. As Ruby is falling and being dragged down into the darkness, she is shown reaching for the staff. In the void space, Penny is the one with the relic. So with Penny having this strong connection to Creation, and the lyrics “fight for every life” playing as Ruby reaches for the staff, it’s a safe assumption to make, with the knowledge we now have, that the Staff of Creation represents Penny in this particular moment. Which could mean that V9 will be about, at least partially, fighting for Penny’s life.

Musical Hints:

In terms of music, Friend, as a song for Penny, is very dissonant from the episode itself. The song is oddly cheerful for Penny’s recent untimely death, and it overall highlights the wrong parts of death. It’s simply too happy to be a song about losing one of the most, if not the most joyous characters in the entire show. The song also abruptly ends. There’s no outro, and while this could symbolize the fact that Penny died young, it could be that the song itself is unfinished in a story sense.

What do we hear just before the song finishes, though? A progression of notes that sounds eerily similar to the last line of the opening of Volume 8. The notes for “Fight for ev’ry life” and “Who fin’lly felt alive'' share a similar melodic structure, they aren’t perfect clones of each other, but they are incredibly similar, to the point where it seems intentional. Penny may very well be the life that the opening song is fighting for. It is also worth noting that the line “Fight for every life” comes just after “Sometimes it’s worth it all to risk the fall,” which is the exact wording used for the description in the Volume 8 finale. Team RWBY risked the fall, yet, strangely the opposite of fighting for every life happened with Penny’s sacrifice. Perhaps the time to fight for every life has yet to happen, and we will see it come Volume 9.

For another thing, the lyrics for Friend are entirely centered on Penny’s feelings for Ruby, to the point where they read very much like a bittersweet love song. The music itself is incredibly cheerful, as mentioned previously, creating a mood whiplash with the end of the volume. Why would we hear a song about Penny’s feelings for Ruby, sounding like a love song, if her death is supposed to be a tragic sacrifice akin to Pyrrha’s? The song may very well be giving a clue into its future use in the show proper.

If this was meant to be a good bye song, why make it so cheerful and romantic sounding? There's only one part about her dying and even then, it's just too accepting and goes right back into cheerfulness. The song is also pretty hopeful, telling Penny's story in a fairly chronological order. And the part where she talks about sacrifice is quite pointedly followed up by one about feeling alive. It also ends with the super cheerful chorus, the word "alive" being the last... (Remember the episode title: The Final Word)

(I want to thank my friend @shadow-0f-x for writing the majority of this section! I was struggling to choose how to tackle it as I am not well versed in music theory.)

What We Didn’t See:

It is likely that Penny understood Jaune's semblance better than him and figured something out about it’s abilities in the same way that she understood Ruby's semblance better than her. She had plenty of time to observe his semblance up close as he boosted her aura to stave off the virus. Because of that intentionally timed cutaway in the finale, we don’t get to hear her explain herself after her strained “Trust me.” All of that seems really suspicious to me.

Pyrrha Parallel:

Pyrrha and Penny both sacrificed themselves to stop or stall Cinder. Jaune tried to convince the both of them to stop. With Pyrrha, he failed, while with Penny he actively helped her sacrifice herself. Doesn’t make sense for the guy who was determined not to let anyone else do what Pyrrha did, unless of course Penny assured him she’d be alright.

The Moment:

RT including the suicide hotline in the description shows that they're aware that Penny basically committed assisted suicide, seeing it as a noble sacrifice worth doing to save her friends. They're aware, and I believe they're smart enough to condemn that decision to hell and back.

The best way to do that in my opinion is to pull her back into the land of the living and let her witness first hand the consequences of throwing her life away so freely. This would show Penny how her actions affected others so maybe she could learn to truly value herself. To not think herself expendable. It would be bold and unwise to portray this choice as something good, unless it was going to be called upon later and be pointed out for how horrible it really is.

On top of this, Penny was way too content with her death, happy even. There's no way team RWBY is letting her stay content with it. It’s almost as though we're supposed to join Ruby and Co. in calling bullshit on what Penny is saying and doing because no, Penny, this is not how things are meant to work. It's as if Penny was basically saying "I want to die for my friends" because most of the volume had been about everyone else making sure she didn't die. She knows it will hurt them. She knows.

At the peak of it all, a choice like this will totally destroy Ruby. It may very well be her breaking point for Volume 9. Curiously, the moment itself is written like it’s the first choice Penny’s ever made, yet the entire Volume shows this isn’t the case. However, this is the first choice that Penny’s made solely independently and it’s rather pertinent that the choice she makes is a mistake. Outside of giving Winter the Maiden gift and saving the day temporarily, this sacrifice will not have any lasting positive effects. Jaune will be saddled with the grief of killing Penny. Ruby will have to live with losing her best friend and not being able to protect her a second time, and Winter now has the burden of the Winter Maiden abilities, making her a target of Cinder. This is a bad thing, and Penny needs to see the long term consequences.

Transfer of Power:

As we all know, colors in RWBY are really important and get a lot of focus in the show. That means the yellow we see as Penny gives Winter the Maiden Powers was intentional and likely important, no matter how insignificant it may seem. It’s possible that the transfer effect being yellow could have something to do with Jaune’s semblance. When Fria gave the power to Penny, the effect was very much blue, so this transfer should have been green since she was the one giving it this time. The weirdness of this transfer and the focus on color in RWBY really makes it look like something’s up with how that went down.

A little off topic, but Penny saying "I won't be gone, I'll be part of you." makes me think... Winter is smart, so when she gets time to think about what Penny said, maybe she'll arrive at the same question many in the audience came to; if she's literally part of Winter, can they be separated again? If Winter starts questioning that, the possibility of Penny coming back just skyrockets.

Fria actually tells Penny "I'll be gone" before giving her powers up, which is an interesting contrast to Penny telling Winter "I won't be gone". She may have gotten that line from Winter be all philosophical in V7, saying Fria was now a part of Penny, but it hits differently coming from an actual Maiden. S5o it’s possible that Maidens usually actually will be gone, but Jaune's semblance did something to change that.

This could go well with the theory that they won't need to find an aura transfer machine, or build another one, because Jaune will have a semblance evolution allowing him to do the transfer instead. It might actually be that this evolution already happened and the golden light we saw was Jaune transferring penny's aura to Winter in some way?

An observation that I find interesting is when Penny gives winter the powers, not only is the aura yellow but penny completely glows yellow too, and she obviously starts to disappear, but she doesn’t seem to fully disappear, she just glows.

It's possibly a fading out effect and she does fully fade but animation makes bright light easier, and so we don't actually see her disappear because she's dead and not gone. But it does once again emphasize the color yellow here!

And the color is coming from Penny, it does go up Winter's arm a bit, but Penny is clearly the source. This transfer is so weird and I’m not really sure how to interpret it. There's just actually no reason that we are aware of to make the effect yellow here is the thing. Unless it has something to do with either Jaune or Ambrosius, or potentially a combination of both...

Jaune’s Aura:

The way we see Jaune's aura break in the finale is strange. His aura shouldn't be breaking here. It had been long enough since he was boosting Penny, he's had time to recharge, and it didn't look like it was a strain on him at all. Plus, we know he has a lot of aura, so there probably wasn't too much to recharge in the first place.

He has a massive amount of aura, it has never broken before as far as I remember. Even if it has though, that doesn’t make this occurrence any less odd. It should absolutely never be a one-hit KO. We didn't see anything that would've drained it, that should not have been enough to break his aura. Unless he did something - something that would require a huge amount of aura - that we just didn't see. That amount of aura drain is far more than just an attempt at healing would do, Jaune absolutely did something with his semblance that took up almost all of his aura.

Pinocchio Allusion:

As any Penny fan knows, her character allusion is Pinocchio, the puppet who became a real boy. Penny deviates from the allusion by having always been a real girl, as Ruby is quick to point out, but she shares many story beats with her original story including multiple deaths. In the original story, Pinocchio dies from being hung by his own strings due to his poor decision making and he dies. Sounds a little familiar, does it not? This is where his tale originally ended. Readers were unsatisfied with this ending however, so the author decided to change the story by reviving Pinocchio and teaching him to be more careful.

Unlike Pinocchio making all the wrong decisions, Penny often makes the right ones, or ones she thinks is right, when concerning others. While usually a good thing, this has meant Penny almost giving herself up multiple times during V8, her last attempt being successful. This is where Penny and Pinocchio begin to share similarities again. They are both very reckless when it concerns themselves. This carelessness comes from different places, but it ends with the same result of them endangering their lives and even sometimes losing them.

In the Disney movie, Pinocchio dies by drowning after going to rescue Geppetto and washes up on the shore (like the beach in V8’s post credit scene). His father is devastated and takes him home to grieve, but as a reward for his selflessness in rescuing his father, the Blue Fairy returns and brings him back to life, as well as granting him humanity. Penny sacrificed her life as well, and it stands to reason that she should be rewarded for it, much like her allusion was.

Penny got her maiden powers from someone with blue aura and then gave her powers to someone with blue aura. So it could be that not only Ambrosius, but Fria and Winter as well represent the Blue Fairy. It could be set up for Winter helping to bring Penny back to life once more. It’s an out there theory I admit, but it’s not outright impossible either. The Blue Fairy in Pinocchio saved him three times that I know of, so RWBY having three representations does make sense.

Geppetto wished for him to live as a real boy, but it depended on what path Pinocchio took. This is very reminiscent of Penny and Pietro. Pietro wants to see her live her life, and surely with him absent in V8C14 that didn't work, despite Penny choosing. Her father did not see her happy enough to live her life, and will only be able to learn her death through others. But Pinocchio's themes were life and being alive. So the likelihood that this is not her end yet is quite high!

A Girl That Fell Through the World:

Penny could be the girl who fell through the world. The girl in the story fled the consequences of a choice. The only person who chose her ultimate fate was Penny. The others were pushed into the void, but she chose to die. The consequence of her choice is Ruby’s grief first and foremost, which Penny won’t see. The girl who fell through the world does come back though, and the world will be changed severely with Penny’s absence. Alternatively, it could also be Penny coming back to Wonderland or wherever they currently are, as long as it’s unrecognizable to her.

What Returning Brings:

Others might say another return would have no story relevant purpose, but I wholeheartedly disagree. Penny gives a profoundly youthful, joyous, and wondrous outlook on the world and story that we hadn't seen since Ruby in Volumes 1-3(not the end), Penny returning would bring a much needed levity back in after the despair they will undoubtedly be going through. While not necessarily a huge thing in most other shows, for RWBY, a show largely about keeping up hope, an ounce of such relief is a necessity.

As much as I hate saying it, Penny’s death does actually make some narrative sense because she had to pass on the Maiden powers. (They could have done this in a number of ways, and I personally think they chose rather poorly, but I digress.) Throughout this whole volume, we can see Penny seemingly being set up to join the main cast, but would have been too strong with the powers. This also accomplishes ridding her of the burden of responsibility that comes with being a Maiden and lets her obtain the freedom that’s so important to her character.

Once she returns, seeing this grief that her actions caused, particularly to Ruby, will get her to realize more that her actions can have serious repercussions. She made a choice, but that choice hurt the people she loves. She must have known that it would but I’m not sure she ever realized just how much.

I didn’t want this post to be heavy in the shipping department, so I largely left it out, but I am going to say this one thing that could have an impact. If Nuts & Dolts is on its way to being canon, which this volume makes it feel highly likely, this could be a catalyst.

It could prompt an arc for the both of them in which Penny learns to live her life fighting for her loved ones, rather than sacrificing it for them. A relationship could potentially start from there. And Ruby seeing Penny learn these things may also help her to stop doing the occasional but very dangerous and reckless things she does. Ruby witnessing Penny coming to terms with what she did to the people that care about her would actually make her stop to think “wait, is this how everyone else would feel if I got myself killed?” That would be a very important moment of character growth for her.

I’m certain there are other significant things that Penny returning can bring to the show. And there are definitely more sections I could add to this. At this point though, assuming anyone even made it this far, I think I’ve been going long enough already. So let’s just roll into the outro!

As painful and hopeless as it seems, I'm choosing to trust them with this because there is absolutely no way they didn't see backlash coming. The way this finale went makes me think that they calculated for backlash and aren’t jumping into something they don’t have a plan to recover from. Whether this trust is unfounded or not remains to be seen, but I don’t think it is currently. I do think, however, that the cause of this backlash was a major misstep. Now that it has happened though, they have a chance to do something good with it.

I know for a lot of you, trust in CRWBY has been damaged, some even irreparably so. And for those that feel this way, I don’t blame you. My trust in them took a hit too, but isn’t broken completely yet. There are many ways that they can bring her back that would make sense with the narrative, they have the ability to make it right, and after going over all of the hints and general weirdness of things many times, I think they will.

I'm feeling pretty confident now and I really didn't expect that to happen at all to be honest. But discussing and theorizing with the discord server seriously helped get my hopes back up surprisingly fast! It’s actually thanks to all of them that this gigantic post even happened! So thanks a ton my fellow Dolts! And a special thanks to!!

@arcana-amicus

@catontheweb

@cosmokyrin

@gaydontmesswithme224

@jammatown919

@shadow-0f-x

They really helped get this thing across the finish line!

And thank YOU for reading all~ of this! I sincerely wish it gave you some of the hope and confidence that I now have!

#RWBY #rwby vol8 #rwby v8 #rwby spoilers #Penny Polendina #nuts and dolts #mechanical rose #a little #Essay #more like dissertation #I haven't written this much in #probably ever actually #Have HOPE people!

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ry0chann · 3 years

Text

unwanted solitude

event // @/hanemiso Sounds of a Broken Heart collab

pairing // Oda Sakunosuke x gn!reader

genre // angst

wc. // 842

warnings // mentions of death, existential dread

summary // The grieving process is a difficult one. As expected, you're struggling to come to terms with the recent events.

notes // it's not often that i write angst, but i surprisingly like the way this came out

The sun was setting on the horizon, a hue of orange shining over the cemetery. A light breeze tickles your skin, sending a chill up your spine. Here you were again, sitting before him with teary eyes. The grass beneath your legs felt cold somehow, your knees resting atop the ground where you sit, in front of his grave. None of it felt real. It's been months, and yet every time you came here, you hoped it was a dream.

Months before the agreed upon date for your wedding, your beloved fiancé was taken from you. An untimely demise that everyday you wished didn’t happen. You knew his job was dangerous, but you didn't expect it to take him from you so soon. It wasn't fair. He was so young, and he was happy. He didn’t deserve it. It’d be selfish to say you didn’t deserve it either, but you really didn’t.

Silently you sat here, vacantly staring at the name engraved on the tombstone. You felt empty, merely a vessel with no contents. Your heart ached, it were as though you could feel it breaking with the passing minutes. Words would never describe the utter pain you felt. You’d try and put it behind you, attempting to ignore the heartbreak and grief, but it was impossible.

This wasn’t the first time you had come to see him, yet it hurt much more today. Perhaps it was because that sample bouquet of flowers had finally arrived. Months prior to this, you and Oda had put in an order for some white roses— a single bouquet, just to see how they'd look in the vases you planned to use at the wedding. However, the only florist in town unfortunately didn't have any available at the time, so your shipment had come now.

You practically broke down when they showed up at your door. Seeing them was just another reminder of his departure. That's why you decided to bring them with you for your visit. You couldn't bring yourself to say anything at first, knowing those tears that have been swelling would immediately fall once you opened your mouth.

Your voice is quiet when you finally speak, throat burning and eyes glassy when the words come out.

"Our flowers came Oda... They're pretty, aren't they?"

You sniffle, trying your best not to cry.

"I-I'm sure you would've loved them... I really wish you were here, to see them..."

A single tear rolls down your cheek, your eyes now foggy from the build up. You blink, and a couple more fall. In an instant, you're sobbing, not being able to keep yourself together anymore. You mumble an apology, saying you were sorry for always crying over him. You knew he wouldn't want you dwelling on his death, and yet you were.

"I-I miss you . . . so much..."

Gently, you set the roses down at his grave, covering your eyes as your tears continue to flow. God what you'd give to see him again, even if just for a second. The hug he'd give you if he were here felt so necessary, you missed feeling his arms around you.

You wipe your rosy cheeks, unsuccessfully ridding them of tears, which would only stain them once more.

"Odasaku I—" your breaths hitch, words getting caught in your throat. "I'm so lonely without you..."

You take a moment to look at the ring on your finger, admiring it through your fuzzy vision. The sight only made you sob harder. What a pretty ring it was, what a shame you'd never see the wedding band that was supposed to accompany it.

Life almost didn't feel worth living, it felt as though everything that brought you joy had been taken from you. He was your everything; the reason you got up in the morning, the light at the end of the tunnel— and now he was gone. You missed hearing his voice, and seeing him smile. You missed the way he'd kiss your forehead to wake you up, and the way he'd blush whenever you complimented him. The world felt dull without him.

After all this time, you still couldn't accept the fact he wouldn't be coming home with you, or that he wouldn't be there to hold you in bed. Loss was common in life, sure, but you didn't want to experience it like this. It took such a toll on you, to the point where all you wanted to do was sit right here, with him, forever. He was the only thing that mattered, nothing would come above him.

Minutes of crying later, you finally stand, sighing shakily as you try and bring yourself to your feet. You stand there a moment, looking down at the flowers as you attempt to steady your breaths. Before leaving, you lean down, taking a single rose for yourself; memorabilia. Softly, you kiss your fingertips, placing them on his name carved into the stone.

"I miss you everyday..." you whisper, still sniffling a bit. "And I love you, more than anything."

#[ drabbles ]#bungo stray dogs #bsd #odasaku sakunosuke #bungo stray dogs x reader #bsd x reader #odasaku x reader

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rachaelswrites · 4 years

Text

Mission:AU

Prologue

Peter Parker x Barnes!reader

Ever since Thanos happened, your life changed forever. Two of the people you most admired left you. Natasha sacrificed herself and Steve left for Peggy. You were heartbroken but grateful you had your dad back. Fury didn’t let you have much time for grief before he tried to make you and Peter (who was grieving Tony still) the new Avengers. Bucky chewed Fury out for trying to get you back to missions. He gave you a month and then you were back in a briefing room; Sitting across from Peter. You always had taken a liking to him and not just because he was your age. You admired how he protected the people he loved and stood up for himself. You wished you were closer friends instead of co-workers. You would actually prefer if you were dating, but you kept that a secret.

Fury announced that you and Peter would be going on a mission together. Your goal was to stop a tech dealer and his was to intercept the delivery. You were leaving the next day so you decided to visit Steve before you left. He was the only person who knew about your crush on Peter. He swore to not tell anyone. Not even Bucky. You went to Steve a lot for either asking advice or just talking. You told him everything that you didn’t tell Bucky. He was one of the only people you trusted.

You knocked on the door to his apartment and he greeted you with a smile and a hug. You set your school bag down on the couch and went into the kitchen. You grabbed a bottle of water from the fridge and sat down at the table.

“Steve. You’ll never guess what happened!” you exclaimed.

Steve looked up from his newspaper he was reading, "What happened Y/n?” he hummed.

You took a swig of water and slammed it back down on the table, startling him.

“Fury assigned me and Peter on this mission. But it’s just us. Number one, I’m surprised that my dad didn't object to that and number two, what am I supposed to do Steve. You know. Because of the… you know.” you rambled.

Steve put his paper down and looked you in the eyes, "You’ve been able to hide it for so long. Why can’t you hide it for another few days?”

“It’s different this time,” you explained, “this time it’s just us and no one else. It’s awkward.”

“You know, I had my first kiss with Peggy on a mission. You never know what’s going to happen,” he shrugged.

“Eww. I didn’t need or want to hear that,” you checked the time and realized you should get home to your dad, “I gotta go Steve. I’ll be sure to keep you up to date.”

Steve nodded and you got your bag and left.

The next morning your dad went into your room and woke you up.

“Y/n doll, Peter’s here. You gotta leave in 10 minutes,” he said, shaking you softly.

You opened your eyes and rolled over. Your dad smiled at you and your eyes moved to the door. You shot up, when you saw Peter looking at you sheepishly. You looked at your alarm clock and saw that you overslept by an hour.

“Can you two leave so I can get dressed or do you wanna stay?” you asked.

Both of them nodded and left, Bucky closed the door behind him. You quickly got changed and grabbed the duffle bag you packed the night before. “Thank God I packed it last night” you thought. In the kitchen, Bucky was drinking coffee and talking to Peter.

You grabbed a package of pop tarts and turned to Peter, “Are you ready?”

Peter looked to you and then to Bucky, who had his eyebrows raised. Concerned for your poor choice of breakfast.

“Do you want to eat something else? We still have some time to spare,” Peter asked.

You shook your head and walked to Bucky. You gave him a hug and told him goodbye. Peter followed you out the door and into the hallway and down that stairs.

“Sorry I overslept. Normally I’m very punctual,” you explained.

“It’s fine Y/n. I don’t mind,” he said.

The rest of the way to HQ was silent and awkward. Every other time you were with him, there were other people around so no pressure on you to hold conversation. Peter had just gotten rejected by MJ, so asking him out now wouldn’t work. At some point you would have to confess before it all got too much for you. Your Hydra training helped you keep in your emotions and not show anything. Until you got to Wakanda that strategy worked well. Part of your recovery was to get in check with your emotions. You used journals, like your dad to write feelings and memories from your life. You kept them all in a small box under your bed. Bucky knew about the journals and their location but didn’t dare read them. He knew you were still dealing with your past. While under Hydra’s control, you didn’t have the option to be mind wiped so everything that happened was still fresh in your mind. Nobody outside of the doctors in Wakanda asked about your past; too afraid that you would get upset or angry with them. It was quite the opposite. You wanted to tell someone, but didn’t know how. You just hoped and prayed that someone else would break the ice for you.

You and Peter arrived at the hangar where the jet you would take was parked. A guard took both of your bags and set them onboard. Another guard walked up to Peter and handed him a folder, most likely containing info on the mission. You stood on your tiptoes and peered over his shoulder. (you were a bit short for your age). He noticed you hovering and lowered the folder to your eye level. You shot him a smile and continued to read it. You learned that the piece of tech was some sort of machine that could alter space/time. You internally groaned. You had enough of weird sciencey stuff. You wish it was just normal, base infiltration like some of your older missions.

“Times are changing doll,” is what your dad always told you.

Both of you got on the jet and sat across from each other. Peter wanted to be your friend, it was just that he was intimidated by you. The first time he met you, you were only nine and you nearly kicked his butt in Germany. He would've tried to talk to you later, but Thanos happened.

“So uh. Are you excited to get back out there?” Peter asked you.

You looked up and shrugged your shoulders, "I dunno. I guess. I’m glad it’s not with my dad and Sam. I’m tired of hearing them bicker,” you said.

Peter chuckled and you made small talk the rest of the way.

Once you touched down, you took a cab and checked into the hotel. There was only one room booked for you two. Luckily enough there were two beds. You set your things on the bed while Peter went into the bathroom. You unzipped your bag and pulled out one of your journals. You always kept one with you. Just in case. You pulled the sheet off of the corner of the bed and placed the journal there. You placed one of the pillows over it to hide it. You grabbed a change of clothes and put it on the edge of the bed. You walked over to the window and drew the curtains open. You looked out into the night sky. You were only on the second floor, but the view was still breathtaking for you. You were on the edge of the city. You saw the silhouettes of all the buildings and looked up into the sky. You saw only a few stars because of the light pollution. You loved the stars and the night sky. One of your favorite things in Wakanda was the planetarium. Once Bucky was out of cryo-freeze, he would take you there every chance he could.

Peter walked out of the bathroom wearing sweatpants and a t-shirt. You moved from the window and grabbed your clothes and went into the bathroom. You took a quick shower and changed. You walked out and saw Peter sitting crisscross on his bed, doing some school work.

“Even on missions, you still do school work. That’s what I call dedication,” you teased.

He looked up from his textbook and smiled.

“School’s a bit different than it was in the forties,” he joked back.

You grabbed your hair brush and brushed through your wet hair.

Peter watched you intently, “Do you wanna join me?” he asked, patting the spot in front of him.

You set the brush down and jumped on the bed. You were now sitting across from each other. Every time Peter looked down at his book, you managed to study his face. You saw the way his eyebrows furrowed when something confused him and you saw the way his whole face relaxed when he got through something quickly. You quickly snapped out of your daydream when your phone started ringing. You got up from Peter's bed and checked it. It was your dad. You excused yourself from the room and his gaze followed you out the door.

“Hey dad what’s up?” you asked.

Bucky was sitting on the couch with his phone propped on the table. You heard Sam yelling something in the background.

“I’m doing good. I just wanted to make sure you got there ok. I already miss you,” he said.

“I miss you too and it’s only been less than a day.”

Bucky chuckled. “I just wanted to remind you to get a goodnight sleep. And to tell Parker to keep his hands to himself.”

“Daddd,” you groaned, “we have more important things to focus on than that,” You said goodbye and hung up.

You went back into the room, Peter was now flipping through channels on the tv. “Hey y/n do you wanna watch a movie?”

You really wanted to but, you knew that something was going to happen. Just like in the movies Shuri made you watch.

“I probably shouldn’t. We have a long day tomorrow. I’m going to go to bed but feel free to watch one,” you tried to sound sincere and it must’ve worked.

Peter turned the lamp off and you crawled into bed. You fell asleep within minutes.

You woke up early the next morning before Peter. He must’ve been up late, since the TV was still on from whatever he was watching. You quietly grabbed the journal and jotted down a few notes from a dream you had last night.

It was you, Bucky, and Steve at the beach. Right before they both decided to enlist. You remember the smell of the salty air and the breeze brushing on your skin. Your dad had wrapped you in a blanket, making sure you wouldn’t get sick. You watched as Bucky and Steve played a short game of toss. Keeping your three year old self entertained.

You finished writing and put it back in it’s hiding place. You got out of bed and rummaged through your bag to find your suit. You tiptoed past Peter’s sleeping form and into the bathroom to get ready.

After about another hour you had to wake Peter up. You shook his shoulder gently, “Hey Peter we gotta go or else we’re gonna miss it.”

Peter slowly opened his eyes. You moved away and started to gather up your things. Peter made his way into the bathroom and came back out in his suit. You always thought he looked good in it. You did think about confessing your feelings but were unsure of how he would react. You were technically way older than him, since your birthday was in 1939 but when you first saw each other, you were nine and he was fifteen. Then he got snapped two years later and you aged five years, which now made you only about a year apart. Did he still view you as the little girl at the airport or did he see you as the girl who fought Thanos twice? You didn’t know.

You both threw on jackets and headed back down to the lobby. Outside, you waited for a cab. Peter was still too sleepy to talk on the ride over but woke up as soon as you had to walk a block in the cold morning air.

“How’d you sleep?” he asked.

“I slept like a baby. I had a really good dream too so that helped,” you said.

You guys reached the warehouse and Peter went inside and hid in the rafters. You ducked behind a huge storage unit and waited for the dealer to arrive. After a few hours, a black car pulled up to the door of the warehouse. You shifted to a position you could quickly spring up from. A tall man stepped out of the car and opened the trunk. He pulled out what you assumed was the space/time machine thingy Peter was supposed to take. You inched along the container, trying to get closer. The man set up the machine right outside the door. You realized the deal was taking place outside and Peter would have to join you here.

“Hey Peter,” you whispered in the comms, “The deal is out here. I have to distract him for you.”

Before he could answer you pulled one of the knives you had and used the handle to create a loud noise. The man turned his attention away from the doorway and in your direction. It was only enough time for Peter to web the door and pull it open from the rafters. The man was startled and looked around for any signs of other people. You had to step up your game. You took a deep breath and stood up. You dragged the handle of the knife along the edge of the container while walking into plain view. The man looked at you and smirked.

“What are you doing here little girl?” he sneered.

You looked offended before responding. “Do I really look young enough to be called a little girl? I’m shocked.”

Peter took this as his cue to swing down and try and take the weapon. The man was faster and zapped Peter with it. Peter fell to the ground and you shrieked.

“Peter!” you tried to run to his side but you found yourself on the ground and blacked out.

#x daughter!reader #x teen!reader #marvel #bucky barnes x teen #bucky barnes x daughter #bucky barnes x teen!reader #bucky barnes x daughter!reader #peter parker #peter parker x reader #bucky barnes fanfiction #peter parker fic #series #mission:au #peter parker x barnes!reader

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levbug · 4 years

Text

𝐒𝐀𝐅𝐄— 𝐚𝐤𝐚𝐚𝐬𝐡𝐢 𝐤.

#pairing ー akaashi keiji x royal! gender neutral! reader

#warnings ー royalty au! a few curses here and there. also a mentioning of being locked up, not getting fed enough, arranged marriage (its the plot do beware), marriage to men older than 50 to a younger person, death of natural causes

#wc ー 2.2k

you lay on the grass with akaashi, enjoying the view of the stars above you. it had been months since you two have done this, and you could never tell when the next time would be, so you just savoured the rare calmness you only felt when you were with the boy.

as each day passed and your arranged wedding was nearing, you and akaashi found yourselves getting busier and not having enough time to spend with each other. it broke both your hearts' that, soon, you'd be married and it wouldn't be to him.

you desperately wished to be wed to him, but you were from different worlds: you being royalty and akaashi being the prince's, your brother's, most trusted servant. it wasn't acceptable in the eyes of others.

"so what if it isn't? it's not anyone's business on who i fall in love with. let them say whatever." you had responded angrily to akaashi after he brought it up. he shook his head and held your face gently between his calloused hands.

"i know, your highness, but it's not as simple as it sounds." he kissed your forehead. you relaxed as his lips touched your skin, smiling as you heard him address you by your royal title. his silly nickname for you made you forget about your anger. akaashi was the only one who could do that to you.

the consequence of marrying a commoner seemed like nothing, but it was everything. you would lose your royal status and be forbidden to ever see your family again. it was a cruel punishment, but you were tempted to disobey the rules and do it. maybe even start your own family with akaashi and live in the town.

but every time you saw koutarou's infectious grin, or heard your father's booming laugh that couldn't help but make everyone around him chuckle as well, or caught glimpse of your mother's soft (eye colour) eyes that matched yours, you would second-guess yourself. you loved your family, but you also loved akaashi.

akaashi had convinced you to stay with your family, despite wanting nothing but to go to marry and live the rest of his life with you. he had seen how torn you were and and decided to be selfless, saying he'd be happy to just be able to see you everyday surrounded by those you loved.

koutarou knew of your situation, but there was nothing he could do. he wouldn't become king soon enough, definitely not in time for your wedding, so he couldn't change the rules or call off the marriage. he knew how much you loved akaashi, just looking at you he could tell, and it saddened him that he was helpless in this situation.

your betrothed was the king of seijoh. he was a sleazy old guy with a bad temper and horrible manners. he was at least thirty years your senior and you'd be his sixth spouse. he disgusted you to no end. he touched you inappropriately on the first night you met and when you called him out on it, he dismissed it as a good ol' joke.

he had only chosen you to be his spouse because he saw a painting of you and deemed you physically acceptable. you knew if he found out about your courtship with akaashi, he'd have you executed, as he had with his last spouse. he was globally revered and he knew it, using it to his own advantage.

"keiji?" you called to him softly. he looked down at you with his beautiful dark blue eyes, awakening the butterflies in your stomach. 'gosh, keiji, you never fail to make me feel this way.' you thought, staring back up at him, cheeks heating up under his soft yet intense stare.

"yes, love?" he said softly, voice barely above a whisper. your heart rate sped up a bit at the nickname, as it was rare for him to call you anything but your given name or 'your highness'.

"i don't want to get married to that creepy old fucktard." your sudden statement caught akaashi off-guard and he couldn't help but chuckle. he found it amusing how even if you were raised to be 'proper' and speak only the politest words, you would do the exact opposite.

"well, you don't have much of a choice. when the king says he wants you, it's you he's gonna get." akaashi said, sitting up so he could look at you. "no matter how disgusting it sounds, it's our reality."

"i know, i know...it's just surreal how someone can just choose who they want to marry and the other has no choice but to accept, because if they didn't, it would possibly result in war." you sat up as well, glaring at the ground in frustration. akaashi noticed how riled up you were getting and held your hand in his, tracing small circles on the back of it.

"you know i love you, right?" he said, his grip on your hand tightening slightly. "if i could, i'd fight that sorry excuse of a king for your hand in marriage."

smiling at his sincerity, you scooted closer to him and leaned you head on his shoulder. you felt tears well up in your eyes as you thought of all those days and sleepless nights you had spent imagining your future with the boy who sat next to you.

"i wish i could stay and keep the life i made with you." you sighed. akaashi closed his eyes and just listened to your soft voice. "it's true, i'll never be over you because i've built a future in my mind with you and now hope is gone. there's nothing left for me to do."

akaashi's eyes opened as he heard this. "that's not true. as much as i hate to think of a life without you, you don't need me. you're wonderful, bright, and young. you don't need my love to continue living. and don't bother arguing, because we both know i'm right."

tears threatened to fall from you eyes and it took everything in you to not cry. "listen, (first name), i hope you know i love you, because i really do and i can't say it enough, but with the king, you'll survive. you'll be safe with him, and i'll be content knowing you are."

the tears you had been trying to stop earlier were now falling freely from your cheeks. akaashi took you into his arms and hugged you tightly, rocking you back and forth in attempts to calm your crying.

when your sobbing had been reduced to small whimpers and sniffles, akaashi held you at arm's length to look you in the eye. "k-keiji, puh-please promise me you'll al-lways love me." you hiccuped, your puffy red eyes staring at him desperately.

"i promise. and you promise to always love me?"

"i suh-swear."

akaashi had been wrong about one thing; you were not safe with the king. it had taken years for you to return to your home because the king had forbade you from ever visiting fukurodani when he found out you and akaashi had been exchanging letters.

the old sleaze had treated you like a prisoner, only letting you out of your room when there was an event or when there were visitors and he needed eye candy.

his son, tooru, had been much kinder to you. he was a year older than you and was extremely attractive. you thought you would've fallen for him if you weren't already head over heels for akaashi.

tooru would sneak up to the tower you were locked in and bring you some food, knowing that they didn't feed you enough. you were eternally grateful for him and constantly let him know.

one day, though, tooru was earlier than he usually came and this time he was accompanied by two guards. you recognized one as iwaizumi, as he had also occasionally given you extra food, but the other one had pink hair and you weren't familiar with him.

"tooru, is everything alright?" you asked the taller male as you heard keys jingling in the cell's lock. you were sure there was no event tonight, since usually a handmaid would be the one at the door, never the prince. "did something happen?”

"i'll explain it to when you get out." his usually cheery voice was devoid of all emotion. the door swung open and you jumped back, startled. the two guards helped you stand up.

you were a bit wobbly on your feet, as you hadn't been let out in a month. the guards noticed though, and held you by your arms gently as you walked down the stairs.

a million thoughts rushed through your head as you descended down the tower. was koutarou alright? was this about your family or fukurodani? were you being sent to execution? tears welled up in your eyes at the last thought, knowing full well that the king was merciless enough to kill you for no reason.

when you had made it down the last flight of stairs, you were sat on a soft, plush couch which contrasted to the cold, hard stone floors in your tower. tooru sat in front of you with a somber expression.

"my father is dead. he died last night of natural causes." he said grimly. as much as you hated the king, he was still tooru's father and you couldn't help but sympathize with the grieving man. the king had taken so much from you, but your humanity was not one of them. "you can go back to your kingdom, now."

"tooru, i...i'm sorry about your father." he nodded, and you knew those weren't the right words to say. you couldn't grasp the idea that the king was dead and you were just stunned at the fact that you were free again. "when will your coronation be?"

"friday." he responded with not an ounce of emotion. his usually bright brown eyes were dull. you pitied the poor man and suddenly embraced him. he was surprised by this but didn't pull away. soon enough, soft sobs could be heard from him.

you had decided to stay until tooru's coronation and then head home. the brunette appreciated your thoughtfulness immensely and promised he would visit you whenever he would have the chance.

when you arrived to fukurodani, you were immediately swarmed by journalists and reporters on the docks. they asked questions about your time at seijoh and what it was like to marry an older guy like the late king. it was nerve-wracking to be surrounded by so many people after being isolated for so long and you felt your anxiety building up within you.

luckily your guards had gotten you out of their reach and now you were on your way to the palace. your home. where your family resided. where akaashi was.

keiji.

everyday for four years you had daydreamed of what your life would have been like if you had married him instead. everyday for four years you wished to see his face and hear his gentle voice. everyday for four years you longed to be in his embrace.

when you had stepped through the palace doors, you had immediately run into your brother's arms. the king had been surprised by your informal greeting, but hugged you back, as he had also missed his sibling.

one you had pulled away from koutarou's embrace, you caught sight of the familiar messy black hair and gun-metal blue eyes you had fallen in love with.

you ignored koutarou's protests as you sprinted into akaashi's arms, making the boyーer, manーgrunt from the force of impact and stumble a bit before catching himself from falling.

as a result of so many years of not getting enough human contact, you had become a touchy person, constantly hugging others or touching their hands or arms as if to remind yourself that they were real. that this wasn't some concocted reality. as if looking for comfort.

when akaashi wrapped his arms around you though, you felt a heat flood through your body. it made you feel human, after years of being treated lesser than a pet. it was like a warm blanket placed on your shoulders after jumping into a cold lake. it felt like the feeling of sipping hot cocoa near the fireplace after playing in the snow for hours.

it was like waking up from a bad dream.

akaashi felt you shaking, hearing you sob breathlessly between his arms and looked at you concernedly. but he noticed that you weren't crying because you were sad or scared, you were crying in relief.

he wondered how awful the king had treated you. it angered him that he could hurt you so much. you noticed akaashi's furrowed eyebrows and the dark look in his expressive eyes, telling him to relax because it was fine now. everything was good. you were okay. you were fine.

you were safe.

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theangrypokemaniac · 5 years

Text

Ma and Pa James's Second Biggest Fan (we plough a lonely furrow) continues to find Ma Jess's appeal mystifying, since everything about her is negative:

1. Signing up for Team Rocket suggests someone of a morally dubious character to start with, but the truth lies in the clothing, and she's in black!

Black!

It's code for her personality:

• Jessie wears white:

Pure, beautiful, innocent, sweet-natured, not really bad, dealt a severe hand in life but a fighter.

• Cassidy wears black:

EVIL!!! EVIL, EVIL, EEEEEEVUL!!! FOUL SIRENIC TEMPTRESS!!! EVIL HEARTLESS BITCH STEALING JAMES'S NEVER-BEFORE-SEEN WEEPINBELL!!!

Speaking of which:

2. She was Madame Boss's best agent.

You don't get there being kind.

To reach that standing requires hundreds of successful heists, and we aren't talking nicking gold bars. It's living things.

How many Pokémon do you imagine she stole with merciless efficiency?

How many children did she set upon, pinching every animal they had?

How many innocent lives did she ruin by depriving kids of the pets they loved, never to see them again, eaten away with the not-knowing and the false hope?

The glory of her reign ran on the fuel of blood and tears.

What fate do you envision awaited those Pokémon? It's not exchanging one master for another, it's entering slavery.

Jessie and James aren't the epitome of Team Rocket. They are minnows on the outskirts, despised and mocked by most of their fellow members. The actual group isn't particularly famous for prioritizing Pokémon welfare.

The preferable outcome is being handed out to agents to help catch other victims. Otherwise it's transformation into a war machine, forced to fight on and on to the point of exhaustion and death, no doubt tortured and tested on to boot.

What happens if they don't come up to scratch or are pushed for years until too aged and broken to be of any use? Are Team Rocket ready to pension them off to animal sanctuary?

As if. It's euthanasia or on to the streets to waste away, if not fed to the strongest first.

Ma Jess knew this and worse occurred thanks to her, yet paid it no mind, and felt not a single twinge of guilt in that time of service, then met her end trying to draw another Pokémon into imprisonment.

Some might say it was a case of what goes around, comes around. As her behaviour led to God knows how many Pokémon dying alone, leaving their loved ones to wonder and grieve, so in turn did she die alone in the snow, and Jessie had to carry on without her.

I'm not against Ma Jess, I neither feel like or dislike, but I don't understand how so many fans can happily overlook her murky past of inflicting pain, instead elevating her to a semi-divine tragic heroine, yet apparently Ma and Pa's heinous offences of not stealing and treating Pokémon well are beyond forgiveness.

3. It's the Red Ribbon Army! Save yourselves!

Jessie joined Team Rocket to follow in Ma's footsteps. James went with her. Both moved (upwardly in scale, downwardly in morals) from Sunny Town's gang of petty thief kids to a complex Mafia organisation stretching its wriggling tentacles around the world to crush the air from its lungs.

Why? Ma Jess's baleful influence led the two down that path.

Of course Jessie wants to copy Ma, how and where else can she feel close to her?

There's not even a grave to visit!

Rising in the ranks and Giovanni's favour is both to strike it rich and take her place, becoming Ma in essence. That would make her proud, which is all Jessie ever wanted.

What alternative is there? Stay with Chopper and Tyra forever, ekeing an existence pickpocketing and shoplifting, until mortality comes calling sooner than is welcome, or get loaded quickly and retire early?

James theoretically could've gone home at this point, but when it came to which angry redhead he preferred to beat him up, he chose Jessie.

He was henceforth obliged to go whenever she led, even if it meant following the ghost of her mother into the jaws of evil.

They have an excuse, but what was Ma's for getting involved?

However much they boast and revel in their wickedness, the motto proves the couple still believe themselves on a noble quest, despite everything to the contrary, and why?

Jessie isn't about to accept that Ma Jess, whom she's probably idolized as one of few people to love her and a role model of how a woman should be, was nasty or unpleasant. If she was in Team Rocket, it must be good, whatever the outer appearance.

Except Jessie and James are bad at being bad. They are not master criminals. All their plans fail, rendering them poor and starving in consequence. The inner circle of Team Rocket will always be barred to them because they lack the inner darkness it requires.

The joke is they flourish in any other occupation, whether that be Salon Rocquet, reporters, or flogging merchandise and food at the League. If employed elsewhere they'd be better off, but they have to stay because Jessie can't let go, or bear the thought she might be a disappointment to her mother's name. A different career looks unworthy by comparison.

What, so Ma and Pa have got no son because of Ma Jess? They just wanted him to be a gentleman!

If she hadn't set such a terrible example to her daughter she might have an increased quality of life, but then had she done so Ma wouldn't be dead in the first place.

4. Can't pick 'em can she?

What was it that first attracted Ma to Windy Miller? Does she go for the rustic charm, or the promise of a lifetime's supply of bread to feed the abundance of babies planned?

Don't do it, Ma! He's an alky!

Some birds are like that you see. It's the maternal instinct gone haywire. They find a local reprobate and somehow decide he's really a damaged soul crying out for love, the scapegoat of a cruel society.

He's not evil, he's just misunderstood!

This is why you get nutters wanting to marry the Yorkshire Ripper: they put his 'mischief' down to bad women mistreating his gentle heart, but they of course are devoted to his happiness. They can change him.

You don't know him like I do!

In their fantasy, under the influence of a 'proper' woman he'll transform in to a flower-picking hippie, but not too much, they still like him to be dangerously 'manly' (keeps 'em on their toes), then they can feel smugly superior and more truly female than the 'lesser' breed who failed to tame his sexy pashuns.

And if there's one thing Windy has in abundance, it's raw animal magnetism.

Stop it, Ma! You can't help those who don't want helping!

She put up with the boozing, the flour dust and his somewhat limited communication skills, but what really let him down was the company he kept.

Ever after she would insist Pugh, Pugh, Barney McGrew, Cuthbert, Dibble and Grub led him astray. That's firemen for yer.

Cuthbert? That name's died out.

Sure enough, some point after Ma Jess was stuffed up the spout, old Windy legged it back to Camberwick Green, like the rascal he is, and not a sweet penny piece did she receive in maintenance, the bastard.

At least Ma James got pregnant by a man who stood by her.

She wasn't married to Windy Miller!

Oh, you mean they were living over the brush? I see.

It's all in your head!

Do it my way, and we have Pa Jess. Do it yours, and we're back to a cavernous emptiness. Unless you can supply a picture of the 'real' (pffft) Pa Jess, this is the best available.

Anyway, 'Jessie Miller' just sounds right.

Coincidence? I think not.

5. She went to look for Mew dressed like this.

I could forgive it had she gone in her normal uniform, that's just whimsy, but to have made some effort emphasises that it's not enough!

Some part of her understood a mountain might be a bit parky out, but this was deemed sufficient coverage!

What happened?

She bloody died didn't she?!

6. Ma Boss points the way to doom.

Ma Jess was at least loyal to the mistress she served, but it was a wasted dedication. She squandered her life obeying a heartless virago who could cast aside apparently valued staff without a qualm, whatever thanks she owed them.

The millions Ma Jess accumulated for Madame are probably uncountable, yet she was so worthless that, when dispatched to the mountain, on her own, expected to catch a Legendary Pokémon, by herself, which many doubted even existed, and wasn't likely to come quietly, or put up with orders, but then didn't come back, Madame Boss allowed her only child to sink into poverty and the infamous 'care' of the State.

Everyone knows what goes on there. Entering a home has replaced the workhouse as the place of dread.

Jessie might have been killed or attacked and it didn't remotely concern Madame Boss, unwilling to spare a meagre fraction of her massive fortune to give the girl she made an orphan any comfort or security.

What did she matter? Her mother failed. Why reward that?

In her turn, Jessie became just as obsequious to an undeserving master, who went further than his mama and actively tried to murder her, and still she suffers to please him.

Team Rocket devoured her mother, and now it's swallowed her.

Oh, and Madame Boss got her way upon discovering Mew's fossil, so Ma Jess died for nothing.

7. This.

I'm not surprised Mew wouldn't go with Ma. She probably sensed the vivisection awaiting, and didn't give a toss about the avalanche in revenge.

Mew hasn't got where she is today falling for any old shallow promises from a stranger, thank you.

Suppose the mission had worked, with Mew caught and gift wrapped for Madame's delectation: what then?

Perhaps Mew's power, proving so impressive, would've pushed any cloning scheme aside, leaving Mewtwo unborn and Mew as the mightiest weapon. Or in greed Madame Boss demands more, and in arrogance the scientists promise the earth, the seas and the heavens.

Mew I could see subjected to some non-lethal form of dissection, just to understand how she ticked, that is if they could build the cage to hold her.

As they couldn't, and catching Mew was never a possibility, then Ma Jess's sacrificed herself on a fool's errand, which was obviously one from the outset. If Mew was easy to handle she'd have been captured long before now.

Either Ma dies, Mew's safe, but Madame Boss starts the cloning scheme anyway, or Ma's victorious, Mew is a tool of Team Rocket and the scientists have more sample to experiment upon. Mewtwo is still made, alongside short-lived creations and dozens of unseen freakish abominations preceding.

Now Mewtwo isn't what you call at peace with himself, nor has he received a particularly wholesome experience. One could think Ma indirectly caused that. Her branch of the project may have fizzled to cinders but she still played her role.

What would her legacy have been but to help bring forth the being that wiped out mankind? Where's the future for Jessie when there isn't one?

It's not her fault, but she died in the name of cloning a biological disaster, the creation of synthetic life leading to the destruction of it all.

8. Let's have a gander at Ma in the anime:

• Can afford rent.

• Can afford a tray.

• Can afford crockery.

• Can afford condiments to add flavour to food.

• Can't afford any actual food.

Something's wrong there.

I intended to include affording clothes too, but now I'm not so sure.

I never took Ma to be a brown-all-over kind of woman. At least she gave the fancy stuff to Jessie.

For years I've assumed she wore a brightly coloured jacket, but now I suspect it's a red one heavily patched up, because buying a replacement isn't an option.

Really old clothes are being mended with whatever can be salvaged from even more worn-out clobber.

Best agent Madame Boss has and she's practically living in her own filth.

Team Rocket takes care of its own, eh?

Oh no, let's not get a proper job, one that allows me to provide for my daughter and doesn't ask for my life. Let's stay in this one!

9. Look at Jessie's face!

By her own admission, being tricked into eating snow is the best thing that ever happened to her during an 'otherwise wretched childhood', to the extent she doesn't know it was wrong!

I don't hear Ma and Pa doing that. The only ice James got was an ice-cream sandwich.

What kind of infancy did Ma Jess give the girl for her to be nostalgic about almost dying of malnutrition?

If we say that's a foster mother as in the sub, it means Jessie's fondest memory is after Ma died, which is too brutal for me.

Yeah, thank goodness she's snuffed it.

You think Ma might have taught her not to eat snow! She left her so ill-prepared!

Consequently the sub version makes Ma Jess an awful creature, although I don't see why that Jessie would so desire to mimic a mom she apparently doesn't care about.

10. She's not even bloody here!

I have no picture to signify absence, therefore I must show whom she left behind.

Ma Jess is Pokémon's answer to Bobba Fett: background figure, barely involved, no information, dies early, yet became a fan favourite nevertheless.

If nothing really exists, what is there to like? Why are you contented weaving smoke?

When Rocketshippers put forward the manga as proof, the Anti-Ships used to insist that it 'didn't count' for being set in a 'separate universe'.

If that still goes, and only the contents of the anime apply to the anime, well then it's bye-bye to Ma Jess and Madame Boss, because they aren't real either.

I sometimes think that's true. However traumatic, would Jessie not have acknowledged her mother by now otherwise?

We grasp the characters all had two parents in a nebulous fashion, although not being real people means they don't 'technically' need them, but Ma Jess is the only one who vanished to be granted a face. Why is she then ignored?

She's briefly glimpsed in a passing scene of a single episode of the first series and is never seen or referenced again. The sub doesn't even have that. Where was the use in creating her if only to leave that thread of the tale billowing in the breeze?

We may decide her actions affect Jessie's but we're only imprinting assumptions. She might as well have remained unwritten for all that's made of her.

What we can glean doesn't bode well, irrespective of things left unmentioned.

Her one redeeming deed was dying, thus at least she didn't choose to abandon Jessie. We may presume she'd have stayed with her girl given the chance.

By my reckoning that puts her as Fifth-Best Mother Of Pokémon, behind Ma Brock, Ma James, Dame Ketchum and Ma Boss, in that order.

Then they're those who claim she never died, so she just pissed off like everyone else, rendering her devoid of a single positive quality.

This is the woman you sigh and agonise over for decades.

Ma and Pa are right there, man! Show 'em some love!

#team rocket #ma jessie #jessie's mom #jessie #jessie's dad #madame boss #mewtwo #kanto #snow way out!#the birth of mewtwo

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alwaysaprille · 7 years

Note

I still think we're getting Bellarke, mostly because it's clear the writers have ZERO intent in giving him any other real love interest and I refuse to believe they consider MURPHY more worthy of a love story than Bell. But I really feel we're heading for a Bellamy who has to stand faithfully by while his true love explicitly carries out her dead "soulmate's" (who would've had him dead) destiny, and that is the most depressing ending for him I can imagine.

Disagree. L/xa has already fulfilled her in-universe destiny (as it served the plot), as much as I know that I’m going to get hate for this, it seems very clear that L/xa’s in-universe “destiny” was also to begin to form a tentative alliance between the Arkadians and the Grounders (largely prompted by Clarke) and then die, so we could have the big AI reveal, which is exactly what she’s done. She had no other destiny outside of that.

Clarke on the other hand, has always been our hero. She’s the focus of the story. We are watching her develop as a person and a leader every Season (even in Season 3A where it seemed she’d stagnated-she was still growing-just not the active kind we’d been used to seeing from her). This Season her story is obviously about becoming her own type of leader, we’ve heard people mention L/xa, absolutely true, both Niylah and Roan have mentioned her more than once, but the key is when they mention her. Both mention her at times when Clarke seems like she needs motivation, they continue to tie L/xa to Clarke not just in a romantic fashion, but in a leadership sense as well.

In 405, L/xa is mentioned because Roan and Clarke are once again discussing a plan:

Clarke: “Before you kidnapped him, did Kane tell you about the Nightblood solution?”

Roan: “He tried. Sounds to me like you’re making the next Commander.”

Here, Clarke shakes her head a bit-she’s clearly frustrated

Clarke: “The Flame is gone and you know it.”

Roan: “If Octavia is to be believed.”

Clarke: “Roan, this isn’t a conspiracy. I am doing everything I can to save all of us.”

Roan: “No you’re not. You grieve for L/xa, yet you’ve learned nothing from her. She was Trikru, but she rose above loyalty to clan. You tell yourself you have, too. The great Wanheda, the Commander of Death, who says she wants to save everyone, but builds a ship for herself, for her people.”

This is not a romantic L/xa reference, although it could be seen as one. Roan is calling Clarke’s leadership out. While a lot of us think L/xa wasn’t the greatest leader, she did manage to put aside divisions that had stood for almost a century and form a coalition between clans when no one else could. She even put aside the vengeance she must have desired for Costia’s death so that Azgeda could join. Even after Nia plotted against her, L/xa didn’t kick Azgeda out of the coalition, she got rid of the head of the snake (so to speak) and put Roan on the throne instead. Clarke had not done that as of 405, because, as Roan states, if a plan isn’t going to save everyone like you promised, why waste manpower trying to make it happen?

In 406, Clarke is detailing what the plan is:

Clarke: “I’m going to the island today, to take rocket fuel to Raven and my mom so they can make Nightblood.”

Niylah: “I’m sorry I couldn’t stop that boy from destroying your home.”

Clarke: “It’s not your fault. Now we don’t have to worry about locking 450 people out when the deathwave comes. Or sharing it with Azgeda.” insert self-deprecating smile.

Clarke’s been obviously stressed since she started talking to Niylah, and it’s not a coincidence that Niylah chooses this moment to mention L/xa.

Niylah: “L/xa would be proud of you. We’re all your people now. She believed that, too. She lives on through you.”

All of this could absolutely be seen as romantic, but as Niylah was unaware of Clarke and L/xa’s romantic relationship, it seems more likely that she’s talking about leadership. The entire sentence is about L/xa’s desire to merge all the clans into one coalition and how Clarke is now essentially trying to do the same.

Also the “She lives on through you.” could be excellent foreshadowing for Clarke not having to take the chip. She doesn’t need a “chip” L/xa when she carries her with her at all times.

In 408 L/xa, or at least her position, is mentioned twice (once by Roan and again by Murphy):

Again, Roan and Clarke are discussing a plan:

Roan: “You OK?”

Clarke: “Are you?”

Roan: “Nightbloods. You think I’d have learned my lesson after L/xa. We’re doing the right thing.”

Clarke: “You sure about that?”

Roan: “Certainty’s a luxury leaders can’t afford.”

Clarke: “I’m no king.”-This is Clarke rejecting leadership or at least her ability to lead

Roan: “Maybe not, but you were born for this. L/xa knew it and so do I. You don’t back down when things get hard.”

Clarke: “It’s always hard.”

Roan: “Yet here you are. I know you don’t believe it now, but…one day they will thank you for what you’re doing here. ”

Clarke: “Murphy won’t. Emori won’t.”

Roan: “If it works they will.”

Clarke: “What if it doesn’t work?”

Roan: “Then we die, knowing we did everything we could to save our people.”

Clarke: “Did you come up here to make me feel better?”

Roan: “It’s never been my strength.”

This is another conversation about leadership. Roan, despite his quip about comfort not being his strength, absolutely intended to make Clarke feel better. And he used L/xa to do that. Clarke put herself down, she’s doubting her ability to make the tough calls. She doesn’t want to do this anymore. She’s faltering. And so Roan reminds her that she’s already done it before. That a large part (if not all) of the reason L/xa fought so hard for Arkadia to become a part of the coalition was because Clarke insisted on it. He’s probably realized that Clarke is the reason he’s King of Azgeda and not dead. He’s using L/xa’s name to fortify Clarke’s leadership.

Now on to Murphy (who fighting for his life and Emori’s):

Murphy: “Who the hell do you think you are, huh?”

Clarke: “I’m trying to save us.”

Murphy: “Save us? Ah right, Wanheda, savior of us all! But maybe you’re forgetting that last time you saved us, I was saving you!”

Clarke: “I’m not forgetting.”

Murphy: “You haven’t forgotten? Then please, you don’t need to do this. Don’t do it. Please, please, you don’t need to do this. You know it’s too bad that you weren’t a real Nightblood, because then you could have been Commander. Imagine how many people you could have killed then.”

Now, Murphy’s line about the Commander, especially given so soon after Roan’s statement (That Clarke was born to be a leader. That L/xa knew it.) Probably struck a chord with Clarke. Murphy, like so many of the Arkadians, have no good experiences with the Commander and Clarke herself has seen what L/xa did under that title. Does she really want to strive to be a leader like L/xa? Is that what she wants to emulate? Does she want her legacy to be death and destruction?

And Clarke, after her conversation with Murphy can finally answer that question: “No.”

After all of these conversations about leadership that specifically mention L/xa? What does Clarke do? She rejects one of L/xa’s tenants: “That’s what it means to be a leader, Clarke. The truth is, we must look into the eyes of our warriors and say, “go die for me.”-L/xa in 214 “Bodyguard of Lies”

Instead of looking at Emori, at Murphy, at anyone else to take the Nightblood serum and see if it will work, Clarke chooses to inject herself. So yes, there were lots of L/xa mentions this Season from seemingly random individuals (and we might get even more), but every single one has served a purpose. To remind Clarke that she’s a leader, to give her strength, to show her she’s already made these decisions before and to encourage her to be her own kind of leader. The one she was before she began taking L/xa’s leadership advice (which might have worked for L/xa and all the Commanders before her, but was slowly killing Clarke on the inside.)

You haven’t been witnessing the story of Clarke carrying out L/xa’s destiny. You’ve been witnessing the story of Clarke finally stepping into her own. And if that’s not someone you want to see Bellamy with (who, by the way, has actually been doing his own growing-although his is more emotional-learning who he is outside of just being Octavia’s big brother), then maybe you should….ship him with someone else?

#Anonymous #Bellamy Blake #Clarke Griffin #Lionheart #The 100 #bellarke

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