#theyre never going to be okay theyre always going to be hurting and hurting each other

[ellytraoflight]

Awesamponk came full circle in the egg finale. We’ve seen them jump from lovers to estranged, holding on, letting go, to enemies once again. Ponk’s attempt at retribution backfired on him but it didn’t, really, because Ponk still has Fran hidden away in some secret prison (like a baby piglin used as a bartering chip; like the consequences of Sam’s actions).

Ponk’s “killing Sam” mission started long ago, where he tried to conscript Foolish to help him murder Sam in somewhere around July 2021. It’s worth mentioning, though, that he has plenty of opportunities to murder Sam in the coming months that he never takes. He fantasizes of it like a dream he hopes will come to fruition—a recent ex insincerely wishing death upon their past lover. He’s (understandably) very betrayed by and angry at Sam, but he doesn’t act on any murder plans. His death is not what Ponk really wants at this point in time. 

Even after Sam took Ponk’s arm, Ponk was (mostly) amicable towards Sam face-to-face for a long time. He yells a lot, and he makes petty jabs (“I know you’re good at burning [bridges]” comes to mind), but follows it up with, "Just so you know, you can come to me after everything. I will still support you, Sam, okay? You'll still have a place to stay. Because all the wrong that you have done is going to catch up behind you." Sam immediately says, “I don’t think I’ve done anything wrong.” At this point in time (approximately July 2021), Ponk seems to be bitter, but tells Sam that he’s still willing to wait for him. Sam, meanwhile, obstinately refuses any sort of reproach. This is essentially how their relationship goes for the next year or so, even while Ponk threatens bloody murder behind his back.

Ponk acts in a similar way towards Sam right after Dream escapes prison, only this time the amount of time he’s waited has taken its toll. "The next time you ask for my help, I don't think I'll be there for you. I think I'll just stand and watch. I honestly don't care anymore. [...] You're not even worth the durability on my sword.” Sam offers his own, and Ponk refuses even that. “I don't want you to die, you know why? [...] I have a feeling that someone great, someone who used to be is still in there, and he’s fighting to come out. And one day, that person will make it out, and you will see the shit that you've done to other people in this world, alright? It'll be much worth than death, Sam." Here, I believe Ponk states what he really wants: he can’t wait for Sam anymore, but he doesn’t want Sam to die. He knows that Sam is going to suffer for his actions one way or another, but he doesn’t want to be the one to do it. He’s done with Sam. 

The next time he talks about wanting to murder Sam comes chronologically after his lore stream where he decides to live in a cave. He’s tired, his clothes are tattered, and he asks both Aimsey and Eryn for their help in killing Sam. In a couple of months, Ponk jumps the train from “I don’t want Sam dead” to “I’m going to kill Sam myself.” In between his last interaction with Sam and here, Ponk’s been beaten down by life and has been alone for months. The only thing Ponk knows how to do by this point is blame Sam: in his mind, all his problems started with Sam and his arm. 

This isn’t even considering all the times both Ponk and Sam separately have flirted with Foolish to hurt the other. Or, the times Sam’s flirted with Ponk while truly believing he hasn’t done anything wrong.

By the point of the egg finale, Ponk has realized that Sam is never going to change. Ponk has been suffering, and he blames it all on Sam, and Sam has received no retribution. So, Ponk finally takes it upon himself to hurt Sam the way that Sam hurt Ponk all that time ago, even though he claimed he never would. And it still doesn’t work! Because Sam always had a contingency plan, and he blows up Ponk and he escapes. He still hasn’t learned his lesson—and neither has Ponk. He can never truly let go. 

It’s interesting to think about awesamponk in the context of the egg finale, which primarily covers the story of Skeppy and Badboyhalo. Where Skeppy and Bad have doomed themselves and the world time and time again in order to save the other, Sam and Ponk will never be able to overcome their strife, despite how much they still clearly care for one another. Skephalo say “I care for you so much that everything else can burn,” where awesamponk say “I care for you so much that I’ll flay you myself.” Both exhibit unhealthy codependencies that end up hurting themselves, the other party, and the rest of the server.

I have to wonder where awesamponk is going to go from here. Neither of them are healing, and they are both getting worse, and that’s pretty par for the course for a dream smp relationship, actually.

[percyluvr]

helloooooo!!!! can i request a percy jackson x daughter of hera!reader headcanons?? it would be pretty interesting to see hera having a child tbh

thank you if you do 💛

percy jackson x daughter of hera!reader summary: hcs for percy with a daughter of hera

when he first met you he was kinda worried bc he has beef with hera

but he's also confused bc wasn't she not supposed to have kids??

he expected you to be just like your mom

and you lowkey were

but you were a bit less.. uptight

but at the same time, u cant really blame her, her husband literally cheats on her so much

BUT ANYWAYS

i think u'd be so caring to him and he would love it SO MUCH

since hera is the goddess of marriage and childbirth, u would lowk take care of him like hes ur son

but like not in a weird way

u just care ab him so much that u baby him all the time

since both of ur cabins are always empty except for each other, u have sleepovers all the time

u have a pretty close relationship w ur mom, esp because ur her only demigod kid

percy isnt really jealous per say, bc he's decently close w poseidon, but like

he wishes he was that close with him

hera visits u in ur dreams a LOT bc she just loves u a lot

zeus is mad but she dgaf cuz ur her only daughter

and only kid

so obviously she's protective

esp when u tell her that u and percy r dating

shes at camp the next day asking u to introduce her to him

which ur like "mom pls y'all have already met"

and shes like "yes, but never when he was ur bf"

so u just go along w it bc u love her

they're lowk beefing bc she doesnt want u to get hurt

but as time goes on she realizes how much percy loves u and cares abt u

and she thinks ur the cutest couple ever

she is ready for yall to get married bc shes gonna throw the most extravagant and perfect wedding

and shes so excited esp bc ur the only kid she's going to be able to do this for

have i mentioned that she loves u a lot?

ANYWAYS

yk how in like house of hades and i think chalice of the gods when percy looks at annabeth and is js like "i cant wait to marry her and have kids"

yeah, hes like that but 300000x

and he's so excited bc he knows that ur gonna be SUCH a good mom

people always think ur weak bc ur mom "lets herself get cheated on"

or whatever dumbass shit they be saying

but u prove them wrong

mothers r fr the most powerful people in the UNIVERSE

and ur basically a mother bc u take care of everyone at camp

ur always at the infirmary helping the apollo kids bc its just in ur nature to love taking care of people

and percy always comes in with even the smallest little injuries

and it just warms ur heart to know that he wants to come see u even when ur working

u take care of the little baby pegasi too omg

gn thats so cute

imagine if blackjack had a lil baby pegasi and u took care of it

and percy is just like

melting

ur so sweet to them even if theyre "just horses"

it makes him so excited to have kids w u

whenever u see a little kid

or like a younger camper

u always tell him that u cant wait to go to new rome uni and then get married and have kids w him

the two of u are just so excited for the future with each other fr

i just think the two of u would be taking care of the pegasi and u would fall asleep in the hay after staying up talking

big surprise for the kids that have riding lessons that morning...

yall werent embarrassed tho cuz u have no shame fr

well, u have shame

percy has none

not the point.

everyone at camp sorta sees u as a mother and they always come to u

lowk camp therapist

bc they NEED one real bad

but it doesnt bother u bc u love to help them

ur always trying to fix problems at camp

and its very upsetting for you when you cant, and percy is always there to comfort u

ur lowk a meddler like ur mom

but its okay bc ur just worried about ur friends

i think that u would maybe have some soothing powers kinda like a hypnos kid, where u can like calm people down or put them to sleep

i also think that percy would suffer from panic attacks after his nightmares

so after he has a nightmare, you're there and if you can't soothe him with your words you just use ur powers

u can't stand to see him like that

it just upsets you so much

percy is so grateful for ur powers, but hes even more grateful for you

i think ur a lot more relaxed than most people at camp

and u dont really see the point in doing dangerous things for fun

which is different for percy, but he really does like it

he likes that he can just go to you and ask to relax and ur always down for that

its a change of pace that is definitely welcome and necessary in his life

ur definitely more of a rational thinker than him, so u stop him from doing some pretty stupid things

but u would never stop him from having fun

or doing thing that are important to him

ur relationship is lowk the blue print

yall just take care of each other fr

and ur like an old married couple which u two get teased ab

but u dont care

cuz u cant wait to get married lol!

a/n: this was a vv interesting request to write and i honestly loved imagining what a child of hera would be like so thank u for the req!

[euphoricimagination]

hellooo how are you? i was wondering if i could request a scenario where reader finds out her friends were fake, and theyre super rude to her and the boys find out and how they would react. with bokuto, akaashi, and kuroo :3 and if you could add atsumu or suna in there, that would be cool but if not its okay!! thank you so much <3

Of course! Thanks for liking my works! Here's what i came up with

Feat. Kuroo, Bokuto & Suna-> Masterlist

Fake friends

Kuroo

You were sitting in the café while waiting for Kuroo to arrive, he just texted you saying that he’ll be a few minutes late to your date, but you didn’t notice the message, too in your head to even hear the ring of your phone.

Lately you been feeling like your friends were being unnecessary mean to you. Sure, you always were a bit rude to each other, you always were playfully fighting with each other, but things never cross the line about your personal boundaries…until a few weeks ago. Suddenly you fights didn’t had that playful tone in them, they started to feel real, and suddenly, they were messing with things that you had told them were sensitive. You thought that you will be friends with them despite the distance between your univerties, but when you meet up again in person everything felt so different.

You were so absorbed in your thoughts, trying to figure out if you had done anything to them, that you hadn’t listen the door of the cafeteria open, let alone the steps coming close to you or the sweet voice of your boyfriend calling your name; you only snapped away from them when a hand places on your shoulder, Kuroo looking down at you worried as he kisses your temple and sitting down in front of you.

“hey, what’s wrong?” he asked

“Eh? Nothing, don’t worry” you smile at him, hesitant to tell him

“Yeah, sure, tell that to your face next time too” he says playfully, trying to make you smile “you can tell me anything, I’ll help you out however I can”

“well, it’s just….” You sigh before explaining to him the thoughts that were in your head prior to his arrival. He just sighs, he knows your friends and he thought that your bickering was cute, but there was no mistake in their recent actions

“well darling, I could always talk to them if you want me to” he offers, trying to find a rational solution for you first “but…”

“mhm?”

“I personally don’t think is worth it to keep them around any longer” he says, he didn’t want to keep you away from them, but the hurt in your eyes wasn’t a lie “you told them you didn’t like those ‘jokes’, they didn’t listen. If they don’t respect your boundaries there’s no point in being friends”

“I…I” You listen to him attentively before bursting down crying, you knew he was right, of course he was “we’ve been friends for so long though, they were my only friends since high school…”

“I know, darling, I know” he comes to your side, hugging you “you have me for whatever you need; Kenma too, he does like you a lot too even though his personality doesn’t show it; hell, even Bokuto adores you and he met you once before” he says, making you chuckle “and I have no doubt you’ll meet more people in your classes, you’re amazing, anyone that doesn’t want to be your friend is the idiot”

You chuckle again, relaxing into his arms as you try to calm down. Everything will be alright as long as you had him by your side.

“now, let’s order something and go to my place?” he asks you

“Sure, let’s go”

Bokuto

You were hanging out with your friends while waiting for Bokuto to arrive. Well, hanging out with them was an overstatement, after all you were being left out of the conversation after trying to join multiple times, leaving you on the side while they giggle about whatever they were talking about. You eyes were stinging due to the tears that were about to come out, feeling depressed about the way this day has ended.

Originally you and your so called friends were going to hang out during the day on a convention after months of not seeing each other, and everything seemed rather normal in the beginning; but not even an hour has passed when you noticed that they slowly started to put you aside. First every comment you made was ignored or laugh off, then they left you behind while walking, and now they seemed to completely forgotten that you were even there as they talk about a relationship of one of them that you weren’t even aware it was happening. You wanted to call Bokuto to pick you up early, but you knew he had practice so you laugh it off and wait.

But once you saw Bokuto walking towards you, excited grin on his face as he waves his hand, that you tears started to roll down involuntary. With Bokuto affection and attention was never a problem, but after feeling so unappreciated today, his overexcited self was so welcomed.

He saw your tears, confused as to why you were crying before he noticed the way you were sitting alongside your so called friends. They were all together on one side of the table while you were alone on the other, no one sitting beside you as they chit chat with each other. He walked faster towards you, unexpectedly pulling you up of the chair and giving you a big hug

“Hi, my cutie pie” he hugs you tightly, the eyes of your friends popping out as they realize just who was in front of them “why didn’t you called me earlier if you were uncomfortable?”

“you had practice”

“that can wait, coach would have understand!” he adds, taking your bag in his shoulder as he pulls you even closer to him. He then turn towards your friends, who are babbling something to you, and gives them an uncharacteristically serious look “you should be ashamed, no one deserves to be ignored om purpose, let alone someone that you call your friend”

With that he pulls you away from them, but instead of going to his car, he takes you to some stalls

“Aren’t we going home?” you asked

“Well, it’ll be a waste not to enjoy this place! Besides you probably didn’t actually enjoy it, so let’s have some fun first!” he says going back to his carefree self, and while you didn’t know if he did it to cheer you up or because he did actually wanted to be in the convention, you did up enjoying it this time around with your lover.

Suna

You lay in the bed waiting for Suna to come to lay with you, watching social media while he showers after a long day of practice. You had to take your make up off, but were feeling too lazy to stand up right now.

You were supposed to go out with your friends tonight, nothing too crazy, just some hangout with them; but at the last minute they message you telling you that it was cancelled since something had come up. You didn’t mind, you didn’t really enjoyed going out anyways, so staying in with Suna make you more than happy.

That was until you entered Instagram and saw the stories posted.

You saw the normal stories from her day, until you arrived to one that was posted 30 minutes ago, in the place that you were supposed to hang out. You tried to not overthink about it, maybe she ended up going alone since she was already ready; but then you saw the next one, which was posted in the closest friend tab, with the three of them hanging out there and having fun.

Oh.

“hey, we need to buy more shampoo, we close to running out of – you okay?” Suna tells you going out of the bathroom, only a towel on his hips. You pass him your phone, letting him see the stories your ‘friends’ posted as he raise his eyebrows, visibly annoyed “those bitches are the lowest of the low”

You chuckle weakly, you knew he would be the first to curse at them

“hey, you haven’t take that pretty make up off, have you?” he asks tossing the phone in the bed, taking some clothes off the closet

“No I haven’t, why?”

“Well, put some pretty dress on, were going to have some dinner” he says

“weren’t we going to order some take out and watch movies?”

“and let them think they won? Not in my watch, pretty, they have the nerve of post their hangout knowing that you’ll see them, so now it’s your turn to brag”

You chuckle, he was petty, you knew that, so this shouldn’t surprise you at all

“and how do you plan to find a place with space for us?”

“nothing some money can’t help” he winks at you “lets go, a fancy dinner is waiting for my pretty girl”

You did end up in a fancy restaurant, in a table with the best view of Tokyo and the group of your ‘friends’ blowing up with notifications about how sorry they were. You’ll make sure to block them later, for now you’ll enjoy the dinner with your boyfriend.

[illyabata]

scars are A Thing™ with wriothesley and nobody can convince me otherwise, idc if there is zero mention of his scars or their meaning when he comes out idc it’s my permanent headcanon that scars and their stories are simply entangled with his character idc

so now i give you: wriothesley who is fascinated by your scars

tw: discussion of scars lol, but in no way do i indicate their origin unless it’s stretch marks. however if talk of scars at all is triggering to you, dont read!! it’s sweet fluffy stuff, but that doesn’t matter if it will trigger you. please take care :)

sfw, big brainrot under cut

theyre so much smaller than his, more delicate, just like you. doesnt matter if compared to other people you are big or tall, he’s such a big guy that he makes you feel small no matter your size or height. and no matter what your scars look like to you, to him they are beautiful. to him they are delicate.

he’s enamored by all of your scars no matter their origin—stretch marks, however, seem to intrigue him the most of all. he’s absolutely transfixed by them, and you can never understand why. he’s simply mesmerized by the way the blemished skin stretches as he thumbs and presses it, watching the discoloration flatten itself only to bloat back when he leaves it alone. for some reason he just seems so puzzled by the concept of natural scarring of the body; nothing had happened to harm you for these to appear—they’re simply the product of change, your skin either going through rapid periods of expanding or shrinking. he thinks they’re pretty.

he’d spend so long just running his rough fingers over your skin, absorbed in the feeling of the puckered tissue under his own blemished hands. whether the scars are stretch marks or from something else, he loves them, he loves you.

this might sound weird but i just like to imagine you both spend time gently tracing each others’ scars as comfort, like it sounds weird in words but it makes sense i promise. there is something intimate and fascinating about scars, no matter what they’re from; it’s truly like the language of your body’s history, a record of what has occurred. you can resent them or be proud of them, it really depends on the person and situation—but regardless, scars are always a record, and that is a constant no matter the person.

and if you’re not comfortable with that level of touch or that much attention on your scars, that is absolutely okay. he’s not going to make you uncomfortable, he’ll always ask if it’s okay before he looks at or touches them—or touches you at all, really. he never wants to hurt you. and if you say you’d rather he not touch your scars, he’ll understand and just show you he loves you—all of you—in some other way.

like idk about anyone else or if its just me and im fucking insane but sometimes i get lost looking at my own scars; sometimes the human body at work is just kind of fascinating to watch, and even more so in retrospect. it’s like holy fuck you’re looking at its handiwork, you can plainly see how the skin has been so masterfully rebuilt into this little woven bandaid of cells, carefully crafted to not only rebuild but protect. your body has looked after itself, and it will continue to do so. and thats just kind of a fascinating thing to me idk😭

some extra thoughts about scars, not really to do with wrio; red brackets will indicate the end of it if you want to skip: [[ it usually replaces any feeling of disgust i have because instead of focusing on the bad feeling of remembering where they came from or being sad at the way they look im able to think about how cool it is the way my body recovered and made my skin even stronger; it didnt just wipe it all away and give me a clean slate so i could forget, it pieced the cells together again bit by bit until it had not only replaced the wound but enforced it—so instead of forgetting the bad feelings, they were replaced by wonder. sort of like a sign that says “proof that where once there was pain, now there is strength”. it’s kind of like how they say you don’t just try to quit bad habits, you must replace the bad habit with a good one. you can replace the bad feelings associated with your scars with new feelings, whether they are good feelings or neutral feelings or meh feelings. ]]

before you, he understood scars to be an ugly thing—a source of shame, a show for others to marvel at if he left them uncovered, for them to ogle at and whisper about as if trying to guess the origin of the wounds was a sort of entertainment to them. and then in the fortress of meropide, his scars felt much less like a source of shame and more like an intimidation factor (which wasn’t something he necessarily felt good about, but it was something that he benefitted from as the duke). but when you came along and he began to know you, suddenly they were this beautiful, fascinating phenomenon that lead him to view his own scars in a different light.

he’s a powerful, strong man, yes. he’s intimidating and feared, but he is also loved, and all for good reason—he is solid and safe, an image of reliability to others. and sometimes it could weigh him down when he couldn’t seem to let another help carry the burden.

the way you made him feel, though, tracing his big ugly scars like they were rivers, like they weren’t repulsive—it changed him entirely, and it changed the way he saw himself. in the overworld, he was a criminal brute slathered in the proof of his savageness. in the fortress, he was the rock-solid standard for redemption, and he had to uphold his firm reputation. but with you, he was able to be fragile; with you, the walls he had built to protect himself from both sides of fontaine’s society came tumbling down, because he didn’t have to pretend when he was with you.

if such a small, sweet thing like you could see him in such a kind light with so much love in those eyes of yours, perhaps he was not so bad after all.

everyone else in all of teyvat could believe he was truly a bad guy like he sometimes enjoyed playing at—but it wouldn’t matter, because there you were in his bed every night, held fast in his big arms as you mindlessly traced the long, thin writings engraved in his skin, letting the stories they told lull you to sleep.

[ashwhowrites]

miscommunication I LOVE IT SM ,

eddie and reader are best friends, he sees reader talking to gareth & gareth tells eddie he has a crush on someone , automatically eddie assumes its the reader so he feels hurt that gareth would “like her” but really shes helping gareth talk to her sister & eddie stops talking to them and kicks reader & gareth out of hellfire , hes angry for weeks so he blows off dates and movie days even when reader shows up to his house with flowers 5 times he still blows her off waynes upset at eddie too. , until theyre having a party eddie wasn’t invited to but dustin brought him , thats when he finds out everything cuz sees reader all by herself in the kitchen while gareth is with her sister , he thinks its gareth that made her sad but really it was him.

A few random notes!

I would like to personally thank everyone for being so patient with me. It's been a few months since I've written a longish fic so this may be incredibly rusty! I hope it's still worth reading.

To the anon who requested, if you even remember requesting this ( it's been a hot minute since you sent it in...) Thank you so much for being patient with this!! I hope you like it and it's what you wanted :)

Thank you to everyone who supports my work :)

I'm excited to finally get a fic out! I hope you guys like it <3

Never proofread

Y/N spent her time with two people, and usually those two people only. Her two best friends, Gareth and Eddie. The three were always together, but weren't afraid to be a part. Eddie and Gareth liked their guy time, where they talked about girls and the band. She enjoyed talking to Gareth about her huge crush on Eddie. And Gareth liked to talk to her about his crush, Y/N's sister. And her time alone with Eddie? Wasn't ever friendly. There were lingering gazes, cuddling, his hand on her thigh and her hand in his hair. He listened closely, always kissing her forehead when she cried. She could talk about anything with him. He never judged her, made everything she said feel important. And one thing she wasn't used to- he made her feel loved and made her emotions feel valid.

Her heart raced too fast for them to be friends. But Eddie wasn't easy to read, she had no idea if he was into her or just was a flirty friend.

Gareth wanted help with asking out Y/N's sister, Steph, which she jumped at the opportunity. Her brain needed a break from Eddie and her feelings for him.

Gareth first planned to go to Eddie but figured Eddie's too chicken to admit his feelings, how would he be any help? Plus it's Y/N's sister, she'll know every detail he needs to win over Steph.

~~

Eddie wasn't quite sure what happened. Or how he was so blind. Gareth and Y/N started to get closer out of nowhere. Suddenly sitting side by side at lunch, whispering to each other. Shoving shoulders as they passed in the halls. Even during Eddie's alone time with Y/N, Gareth finds a way to be there. Did Eddie not see a sign? He never once saw Gareth as Y/N's type. And Y/N definitely wasn't Gareth's type. So what was going on?

But sadly all the pieces fit when Gareth admitted he had a crush.

"okay man, so I got this crush on this girl right? She's going to be at a party this weekend and I think I'm going to go for it" Gareth smiled.

Eddie felt his heart sink into his stomach. Gareth had a crush, and it was obvious who the crush was on.

"what party?" Eddie wondered, he wasn't invited to any party.

"some popular chick, no idea what her name is. But Y/N invited me" Eddie has never once wanted to punch his best friend across the face, but the smug smile on Gareth's lips was way too tempting.

Y/N invited Gareth, to a party. Not a single word mentioned to Eddie. A party that was this weekend, five days away and she hasn't said a word. But asked Gareth?

His two best friends liked each other

~~

Eddie was acting weird. It was the middle of the week and Y/N has barely seen him. He stopped coming to lunch, he never opened his front door when she pounded on it for hours, and he won't answer her calls.

She wasn't sure what happened but tonight was hellfire and she planned to get answers.

~~

Y/N and Gareth headed to hellfire earlier than the rest, knowing Eddie would be setting up. They wanted to get him alone to ask why he was avoiding both of them.

"Hey Eds?" She said softly, walking further in the room, eyes catching that there were two chairs missing.

"wait, who's not coming?" Gareth questioned

"You two are out. " Eddie said flat, not bothering to look at them as he dug out his notebook

"OUT?" Gareth yelped out

"wait why? Tonight is too important for us to be out" Y/N aruged

"I want you guys out of my club" Eddie said, eyes finally looking at his two "best friends"

He knew he was being an idiot. Taking his feelings out on them. Not giving either a chance to explain themselves. He also knows he hasn't given Y/N the time of the day or night.

He kept trying to shrug off Wayne's disapproving look when Eddie refused to open the door. Y/N screaming his name on the other side. One night Wayne came in with flowers and a note for Eddie. Eddie knew exactly who they were from. It was the same flowers he got every year, for their friendiversary. Something Y/N always demanded they celebrated together. He remembers the angry look in Wayne's eyes as he threw the flower right back outside.

"It is not just your club!" Y/N's sharp tone snapped Eddie out of his thoughts. Blinking slowly as he looked at both of them.

"yeah. We've been in this club together since the beginning of high school. We have just as much importance to our club as you do" Gareth stood his ground.

"I'm the leader, you two are just like the rest of the sheep. My word goes" Eddie fought back, crossing his arms as he puffed out his chest. Trying to ignore the sad look that came across Y/N's face.

"You know what? Fine" Y/N snapped, slamming the door behind her as she marched out.

"dude! What's your fucking problem?" Gareth snapped. The coldness Eddie has been giving them was uncalled for.

"I don't have a fucking problem. Go follow your little girlfriend and get the fuck out" Eddie snapped, turning around to pretend to look for something. Not looking as the door slammed again.

~~

Saturday arrived

Gareth was in his room, searching for his best clothes.

Y/N covered her lips in Eddie's favorite red gloss.

And Eddie found himself in his bedroom, strumming his guitar. He hasn't talked to either of his friends since the big blowout. Thursday and Friday passed with glares and silence. A lonely Friday night in his room, a night that was usually filled with giggles and weed when Y/N slept over every single weekend. But once again, Eddie refused to open the door.

His two friends were going on a date to a big party and Eddie was going to spend his Saturday night driving Dustin to whatever friends house and going back home to smoke alone.

~~

"and it's that house!" Dustin pointed out, excitedly bouncing in his seat as Eddie pulled up.

"Dustin, this is a huge party! How did you get invited?" Eddie scoffed. Even a fucking freshmen was getting invited to parties. Is this the one Gareth and Y/N were at? Eddie felt his stomach turn thinking of them dancing on the inside.

"a family friend. Come in?" Dustin asked, shutting the door before Eddie could even answer.

Eddie wasn't sure why, but he followed.

~~

"you got this! She likes you. Be yourself, good luck" Y/N squealed, shoving Gareth ahead. A proud smile on her face.

She watched from across the room, a full drink in her hand. Smiling as she watched Gareth walk up to her sister. Barely one word in and the two were smiling like idiots. It made her think of Eddie. She missed him.

She watched them hug, smile slowly falling. She missed Eddie's hugs. She missed his smell and how warm he was.

Then they giggled. She missed laughing with Eddie. Getting high in his bedroom. She looked at Eddie like he held the stars and now she can't even look at him without needing to cry.

And once she saw them kiss, that's when the tears fell.

~~

He doesn't know how but his eyes found her in seconds. She stood alone, holding a cup. Eddie could tell she was sad. Her body language was slouched and small.

He may have been pissed at her, but he'd always care.

"aren't you supposed to be having fun at parties?" He chuckled, sliding right next to her, not bothering to see what she was watching so closely.

"aren't you supposed to be ignoring me?" she snapped. Her eyes not leaving Gareth. If she looked at Eddie, she'd break down.

"that's fair" he swallowed. He's been an ass, he can't expect a joke to make things better.

Eddie finally looked to where she was staring, his eyes going hard when he saw Gareth kissing another girl

Wait! ......that wasn't just a girl

That was Y/N's sister

"I'm gonna kill him" Eddie snapped, planning to march forward when Y/N grabbed his hand

"hey. What? Why?" Y/N panicked

"HE'S CHEATING!" Eddie yelled, looking at her like she grew two heads. But not releasing her hand.

"what! No he's not" Y/N slightly chuckled. Feeling her tears starting to dry. Just feeling his skin made everything feel better.

"then why are you crying?" Eddie asked

"I'm not" she quickly lied. Dropping his hand to clear off her face quickly

"yes you were. You were looking at him and crying. You like him right? And he's kissing your sister" Eddie explained

"I do NOT like him" Y/N laughed, that was just ridiculous

"what? You guys have been sneaking off and always together" Eddie tried to explain. How was he seeing this situation wrong?

"he wanted to ask out my sister, I was helping" She explained, a small smile on her face as his puppy eyes looked confused.

"your sister? Crush? Not you?" Eddie blabbed out. He couldn't lie, he felt his body fill with relief. He tried not to think about what they did when he wasn't around but asking out Steph was nowhere near his radar.

"no? Why would he like me?" Y/N scoffed. A boy hasn't liked her since forever. Not that she cared. She just wanted the confusion boy across from her to like her.

"because it's you!" Eddie explained like it was common knowledge.

Y/N felt her face warm but tried not to get her hopes up.

"Can we talk? Somewhere quiet? Or are we still ignoring each other?" She asked, shyly looking at him. Eddie hated the small sad smile on her face. All Eddie had to do was talk to his best friends and all his unnecessary drama could have been avoided.

"yeah. I have my van" Eddie offered an encouraging smile, grabbing her hand again and leading her out to the front yard.

~~

"what happened?" Y/N spoke first, breaking the silence.

"I thought you and Gareth liked each other and I got upset" Eddie sighed, hearing himself admit it made him feel dumb.

"Eds, even if we did, we wouldn't stop hanging out with you. We'll always be best friends" Y/N explained, holding Eddie's hand softly.

"that's not what made me upset, baby" Eddie admitted, refusing to make eye contact.

"then what? Got a crush on Gareth or something?" She joked, laughing to herself.

"he's not the one I have a crush on" Eddie confessed, he could feel his palms getting sweaty. The hand she was holding was shaking slightly. Her thumb rubbed his hand softly.

"oh"

Eddie deflated at her response. Of course she wasn't interested. He was dumb for being upset and he was dumb for liking her

"I'm sorry. I know we are friends and that's all we will be" Eddie followed after. A fake smile on his face as he looked at her. Ignoring that his heart raced. He noticed her lips covered in his favorite gloss. He wanted to taste her.

"that's not true. That's not all we can be" she said, leaning a little closer. " Gareth isn't the one I have a crush on either" She winked, a small smile on her face.

Eddie blinked at her blankly. Was she saying she liked him?

"...you like me?" Eddie squeaked out

"yes I do. But I like you a little bit less after the way you treated me and Gareth" she teased lightly, but still meaning her words

"yeah, I'm sorry. That was just a dick move. You guys didn't deserve that"

"We didn't. Ignoring us? Kicking us out of hellfire? You have a lot of ass kissing to do" this time she wasn't teasing. And he could tell.

"I know. I fucked up and I'll earn my forgiveness from the both of you" Eddie promised

"why didn't you accept the flowers?" Her thumb stopped moving on his hand. Her eyes looked away from his as she felt her throat burn. The same horrible feeling in her stomach when she saw her flowers crumpled up in his front yard

"that was very uncalled for and I'm incredibly sorry for acting like that. I was being pathetic and taking everything out on you and I shouldn't have. The flowers were beautiful. Wayne totally chewed out my ass for the past week" Eddie admitted. He was embarrassed of how he acted. Truthfully, the next night when it began to storm, he raced out and collected the flowers. The flowers now sat on his bedside table.

"I'm glad he did. Your ass deserved it. Gareth's been waiting also" She laughed, using her free hand to poke his side.

"I think he'll be a little too busy for that" Eddie joked, throwing a wink.

"but on a serious note, Gareth deserves an apology too. We also deserve our spots in hellfire. And we deserve respect for our roles in it. And you have to plan a celebration of our anniversary"

"done, done, done and definitely done" Eddie said, checking off imaginary boxes

"you do understand that you hurt my feelings, right? That you have to make up for that? You need to make it up to me as a friend before we ever try to be anything more" Y/N explained

"I understand and I agree. I want to make it up to you, and Gareth. I'm going to make it up to you, I promise. Then I'm gonna sweep you off of your feet" Eddie smirked, a horrible wink sent her way that caused her to giggle

"be ready to put in the time and work, won't be easy Munson" she smirked back, leaning to kiss his cheek.

"I've got all the time in the world, baby" he smiled, loving that his favorite gloss now covered his cheek

He can make it up to Gareth later, right now his focus was on her.

Tags!

@bmunson86 @mxcheese @ladymunson @michaelfuckinglangdon @z0mbie-blah @biittersweet @mirrorsstuff @slightlyvicked @micheledawn1975 @ago-godance @magnificantmermaid @tlclick73 @hargrovesswifee @cityofidek @manyfandomsfanvergent @silky-luxe @lokiofasgard616 @loving-and-dreaming @eddiemunsonsbitch69 @thegemaqua @ashlynnkennedy @strangerthingsstories5255 @harringt8ns @pleasinghellfire

[stainedstardom]

hi abbssssssssss

imagine ethan taking care of reader because theyre drunk but they like have a “hatred” towards each other and idk can you add something to it 😭😭

(others already left so ethan and reader were the only ones left) OR LIKE YK HOW DRUNK THOUGHTS = SOBER THOUGHTS AND READER ACCIDENTALLY LIKE CONFESSES OR SOMETHING im making this up as i go im so sorry if it makes no sense its like 2 am rn

hi aisha!! i love this so much so ofc i’ll do it ml!!

DRUNK CONFESSIONS

ethan landry x reader!!

you were drunk, heavily. i mean you had seen ethan flirting with another girl and from there you were out but were'nt you supposed to hate him? he was too smart, too kind and too caring for you to even tolerate him and yet the drinks kept coming and you didn't want them to stop. until they did.

"y/n , honey how are you feeling?" anika asked as she sat with you. your head laid in her lap as you stared at the ceiling. mindy had your feet in her lap.

"im feeling great" you slurred and chad walked over. he ran his hand over your leg and you looked at him

"hey , we need to leave. are you going to be okay if we leave you with ethan?" he asked and you shared a look with him.

"put the pout away, youre drunk and one of us needs to take care of you" he stated and you nodded. you looked at the ceiling again, at this point most of the people had left. mindy removed your legs from her lap and anika removed your head from her lap as ethan walked over

"alright lets get you home" he said as he helped you up and chad looked at him

"take care of her ethan, i mean it" chad spoke in a protective manner and you smiled about it.

"i will" he told him and with that, he led you out of the house and to your dorm.

"ethannnn my legs hurt" you said and he sighed. he bent down and helped you onto his back as he carried you the rest of the way. your head rested on his shoulder. you didn't know why you were letting it happen but you were okay with it.

"okay we're here, where are your keys?" he asked and you pulled them out of your jacket as you handed them to him and he opened the door. he laid you on your bed and took off your jacket

"hey ethan" you said in a slurred voice.

"whats up?" he asked as he removed your shoes and socks. you stared at him

"youre really pretty" you stated

"what?" he asked

"ive always liked you ya know, the way you talk and care. you're so sweet" you slurred out and he blushed. he had waited for you to say that.

"say that when youre sober and ill believe you" he exclaimed and you nodded. he didn't mean it in a rude way and you knew it, he just wanted to make that you knew what you were saying and you meant it.

you fell asleep and the next morning when you woke up, you looked to your kitchen and saw ethan standing at the stove. its now or never

"i meant it, i do like you" you told him and he turned to you with a smile on his face.

"you mean it? truly?" he asked

"of course i meant it" you stated and he walked over , he grabbed your face and brought you in as he kissed you softly and you kissed him back.

who knew that drunk confessions could make something like this happen?

A/N: final ethan ask before i have to work on my other asks!! this is so cute

[raapija]

Xan we get anything slightly angsty from the pookie au 🥺 theyre too content

Thank you for the prompt <3 I'm sorry for the late response. The amount of times I've started to write something, deleted it, started again, deleted, started, deleted... ugh... But now I've finally settled for this. I struggle to write angsty stuff, but I hope you like this one. It became a lot sadder than I anticipated...

This is inspired by this post, so give it a quick glance before reading.

this is set in 2020

summary: Lance calls Fernando after a tough day and it turns even worse.

warnings: angst, self-doubt, lance having a breakdown and fernando not helping

Lance sat on the edge of his bed. The clock on his hotel room wall was too loud. It made his ears tingle with each tick, driving him mad. He got up, went to pick the clock off the wall and pulled the batteries out. He carefully laid them onto a small table and then returned to sit on the bed, now cross-legged and looking down at his phone.

The black screen of his iphone taunted him, begged for him to pick it up. It was beautifully laid on the red satin cover of the bed. Lance fought between calling and not calling. Maybe he should just go for a run to clear his mind, but the idea of hearing Fernando's voice... He needed it right now. The race had been a total fluke, finishing dead last and he had rushed through the media pen to get back to his hotel. Everyone was staring at him again.

Lance grabbed the phone, taking a while before unlocking the screen and going to find Fernando's number. It was under 'Nano ♥', like it had been for years. The emoji at the end pulled on his heartstrings.

"Cariño?"

Lance sighed when he heard Fernando pick up.

"Lancito? You okay?"

"Yeah, uh..." Lance hurried to answer. He picked on a loose thread on a seam on his joggers. The words were harder to find than usual.

"I miss you." he got out. He let his head hang down, gripping his hair and squeezing his eyes shut.

"I miss you too, baby."

"I love you." Lance added, his voice barely audible. Tears started to fall down, staining the satin under him a dark shade of burgundy. He gripped his hair tighter, so hard it hurt.

"Yo también te quiero, cariño."

Fernando's voice was so smooth, so calm. A stark contrast to Lance's sobbing, which became louder and he had to hold a hand over his mouth to keep them inside.

"Don't cry. I hate hearing you cry."

"I'm sorry."

"Don't be sorry either."

"I'm sorry..." Lance whispered. He was always apologizing. Whatever it was. Especially to Fernando.

"What is it, churri? What is making you sad?"

"I had a bad race. They're writing stories about me again."

"Don't look at those. They don't know you."

"I feel like everyone's staring at me. Like they hate me."

"That's not true."

Lance wiped the tears off his face, taking a couple deep breaths to calm down. He sniffled, and then continued: "I know it's not true, but everyone else doesn't. My family, my friends, the guys on the grid... To them that's real."

"No, don't think like that. Your family loves you, your friends love you. I love you."

The word 'love' was losing meaning over distant phone calls. Lance hated it, hated it to his core. He wished Fernando would just come back and hold him. Touch him. Even be there to just look at him.

"Where are you right now?" Lance asked. He knew Fernando was in the Middle-East, doing some sort of a rally raid. He had so many things going on, that Lance struggled to keep up. It felt like Fernando was grabbing at everything he possibly could, finding ways to keep himself occupied instead of coming home, instead of staying still.

"Somewhere, always somewhere."

"But never here."

Lance felt like choking again. He missed him. Missed him so much it was killing him, tearing him apart. If he had known love could hurt you this much, he would've never let himself fall for Fernando.

"I'm tired of being in love and being alone."

"It's okay, I'll find you again."

"But you're so far away from me. You're always away. And I'm always alone."

"I love you, I'm coming back, lo prometo. Te amo."

Again. Love, love, love, echoing in Lance's ears. Two years. Two years Fernando had been away. They saw each other maybe once a month.

"I don't know how much longer I'll be able to wait."

There was a pause in Fernando's end, then a sigh, and Lance felt the tears start to well up in his eyes again.

"I'm trying."

"I need you."

"Cariño, I'm sorry. I promise I find a way back."

Empty promises. Fernando's specialty. Lance wanted to stab at him, right in the heart. A new emotion took over, anger.

"You sons miss you, too. Lando, Oscar and Carlos."

Another pause. His kids were always a way in. Lance took it as a chance to take control.

"You were there for all their life and then you go away like this. Why? Why now? You hold everyone together and now it's all falling apart. You say you love me, but you're never here to love me. You're away so much, it doesn't even feel like we're together anymore. Why?"

"I don't know..."

"Figure it out!" Lance cried. What he was about to say next tortured him, it felt like his soul was being ripped out of him. "I can't live like this. I've given you three years and you've given me nothing. Every day you just go further and further away. Like you want me to leave you."

"No. Never."

"It's what it feels like..." Lance choked out. He didn't even try to keep the tears in anymore. He was too tired of it all.

"You can not leave me. I love you. I find a way, I promise. Lance, you can't."

Lance gave out a pained groan at Fernando's pleading voice. He wanted to throw his phone at the wall. Wanted to scream at Fernando, hit him, kick him, make him understand how much it hurt.

"It's killing me. I give you chance after fucking chance. I'm done with it. I'll only give you one more. One more fucking... -If you don't come back, that's it. I won't ruin my whole life for you."

"I will."

"One chance."

"I promise, I will come to you. Lance, I promise. I lo-"

Lance hung up on him, gripping his phone tight and swinging his arm back to throw it, but he didn't. He instead crumbled down onto the bed, crying into the sheets. He wrapped his arms around himself to imagine it was someone else holding him.

Lance wanted him to come back, to knock on his door in the morning and hug him and kiss him. But a small part of him also wanted Fernando to stay away. That small part ate at him, growing bigger and bigger. Lance wanted to kill it; burn it with fire and never think of it ever again. But it became stronger every day, almost enough that it could take over. Only Fernando could make it go away. If he'd only come back.

[worldofkaeos]

one random deep thought lead to another, and im just thinking of what each character in lockwood and co taught us:

Lockwood: grief is an ongoing process; it never ends, but it can get better if you dare to face it, to open up, and to ask for help. even if on the surface, a person looks sprightly and confident, that person may be broken inside. and it kinda makes me think about the people around me, that they may be hurting inside even if they seem like they don't, and we should be kind to everyone around us, because we dont know what theyre going through.

Lucy: feisty is normal for a teenage girl. if you want to do something, just get down to it. dont wait for others to reach out to you; you should take charge of your own life. if you feel something about a situation, never let anyone get you down.

George: never judge a book by its cover. listen to the logical side, even when the world seems like a raging storm (and your emotions are threatening to overwhelm you)

Flo: trauma is hard. but never give up. (shes so badass 🤌)

Holly: sometimes you have to put up with bitches (lucy), just know that they probably have a lot of things going through their heads, and they just arent matured yet. they will know later, and they'll regret their actions. also misunderstandings happen all the time and ughhh it sucks

Skull: no one is truly evil. good can come from the most unexpected places. (also, be funny. it makes life more livable)

Quill Kipps: I cant believe I didnt add him in: LOOK AT HIS CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT. He's certainly gone through a lot — losing ppl in his life, losing himself. At some point in time I hc that he abused alcohol. He's a depressed boy who's lost so much and has no one around him left. Then he's faith is renewed again when he joined lw and co, you can see this through his excitement over the pair of goggles and also people who care about him again — it's almost like he's been granted a new chance at life. So, lesson? No matter your situation, it is okay to experience ups and downs. Sometimes your downs are so low, but don't ever lose faith. It's okay to lose yourself, it's okay to grief, but know that there's always some hope left if you look out for opportunities instead of lying in the shadows.

[bellyasks]

i literally need: your sarcastic cold behaviour unemotional boy best friend that smh wants comfort when they’re unwell but not talking getting a bad tummy ache that has them desperate for cuddles and tummy rubs

ok this is like my favoritest thing everr i Adoreeee cold stoic guy being all soft for tummy rubs [writing these from the perspective of the friend] [more focused on the setup than the tummy rubs since ultimately theyre all going to the same place]

Your character is generally very un-expressive and thinks they're good at hiding their pain. They aren't. There's a marked difference in their behavior. Each time their friend asks if they're okay, they try to dismiss the question, but there's a definite pleading look in their eyes that's practically begging for attention, even though they hate showing weakness. At what point does their friend finally decide enough is enough and make them accept some care?

Your character never admits when something's wrong, even when it's plainly obvious. It is, in fact, very plainly obvious that they're not feeling good today, and they aren't even particularly trying to hide it. Finally, their friend asks what's the matter, and they reluctantly admit that their belly hurts. Their friend is both surprised and worried by their willingness to tell them and immediately jumps into caretaker mode.

Your character isn't one for physical affection, or any affection for that matter. Their belly is aching badly, though, and they want nothing more than to curl up and have their tummy rubbed. After powering through for a while, they finally cave to the pain and softly lay their head on their friend's shoulder, much to the friend's surprise. How does their friend respond?

Your character's belly has been upset all day, and their friend can tell. The friend doesn't want to make a big deal of it, knowing your character likely wouldn't respond well, but eventually they feel too sorry for them to let it go any longer. They take your character into their arms and give them a gentle tummy rub, and, to their astonishment, your character snuggles right up as though they'd been waiting for it.

Your character is a snarky little bitch and always has some comment to make. Their friends are used to this; they anticipate it. That's why it's so noticeable when your character keeps their mouth shut for once. Their friend grows increasingly concerned by their uncharacteristic quietness as the day goes on, trying to figure out what's the matter until they finally have to ask. Does your character answer honestly?

Your character tends to hide their pain like a cat, not wanting to show any vulnerability. When they come down with an awful tummyache, though, it gets difficult to keep up their stoic appearance. Eventually, the unhappy gurgling of their aching belly gives them away, and their friend immediately starts fussing over them. Does your character lean into it right away, or does it take a minute to let themself open up?

[tillthelandslide]

Insufferable Arsehole Head canons

a/n: okay so i randomly had this idea and i'm aware most people wont be interested in the slightest but i just had to write it, for myself more than anything haha. So I was thinking about the character Lou within my Matty series "insufferable arsehole" and i was thinking about her relationship/friendships with the guys and decided to do some head canons for each of the boys... enjoy if you do read haha

Special thanks goes to @poisonmedaddy13 aka my wonderful support system on here :) thank you for helping me with this, for not shutting down my ideas and for having my back

Part 5 will be posted soon so keep your eyes peeled if you're interested :)

PLEASE DO NOT READ IF YOU ARE YET TO READ INSUFFERABLE ARSEHOLE BC SPOILERS!

You can read the series here

George:

George has been her best friend since diapers, they've gone through every aspect of their lives together, that fact alone means that they're bonded for life

They know every minute detail about each other

She thinks he probably knows her better than anyone

He's the one person in her life who has been a steady unwavering support

He's her rock, the person she knows she can go to for everything, for advice, for comfort for laughs, anything

they have to deal with lots of people assuming they're something more and it has got a bit tiring over the years but theyre kind of used to it by now

she knows he would jump in front of a train if it meant she lived

he would hurt anyone who hurts her and has come close to beating up ex's of hers that have been douches (and has punched a fair few of them)

she's the first he shares lyrics with or song concepts (even more matty sometimes)

they both felt that because they were so close, whatever one was feeling, the other felt too

not a day went by where they didnt talk, even when they weren't together, on opposite sides of the world, they would still talk

there was this one time: when they were around 16 maybe 17, g had organised this big surprise party for her birthday, it was absolutely amazing, he had managed to get a fuck ton of beer and weed from an older friend, his garden was full to the brim of all of their friends, some people she didnt know (not that it matter). but despite it being HER birthday party, he had invited matty who at some point in the night had said something about how the dress she was wearing would make all the guys think she was an easy fuck... she remembered how her best friend (a very drunk and high george) had laughed at mattys words... they didn't talk for weeks after that until one day her lanky friend appeared at her door, begging on his hands and knees to forgive him, saying how much of a prick he had been and how much he had missed her. somehow they grew closer after that, he would always have her back and she never questioned that.

they have their own handsake and george knows her disdain for something by one simple fact: she will crinkle her nose up at him, he'd do it back and then they'd laugh about it... it was their thing

she was practically his sister

nicknames they have for each other: G, Georgie (he doesn't like this too much), he calls her Lou ofc, also pumpkin (when she was sad or needed comfort),

Ross:

ross and lou grew close when they were kids, they were never as close as G and Lou (basically impossible to be) but there friendship was different

ross feels like the person she goes to when she doesn't even know she needs him

he's always there for her: always

he knows whats wrong before she does most of the time

they're relationship has the same vibe as ross x matty, that kind of intense platonic love

he's her cuddle bear, someone who gives amazing hugs, the kind that heal her

again she knew he'd die for her and she would for him

he was one of the best things that had ever happened to her, she know if she were to have kids he'd be the god father

she was his wingwoman most of the time, always trying to find a partner who was deserving of his love, someone who would love him the way he needed to be loved

he felt like her platonic soulmate, someone that made her soul happy

buttttt.... when they were younger they did used to flirt... like ALOT and people often thought they were together bc of this... they got drunk at a party once a shared quite a steamy kiss (they would take this to their graves btw) but over time it kind of just fizzled out and was replaced with this platonic love, he was enamored with her regardless

they were often childish with each other, he'd carry her around the empty stages on his back, so she began calling him "monkey man" not only bc he was freaking tall but because she clung to him like a monkey

nickanmes: lou would call him: monkeyman, macdonald, mr macdonald, he calls her: sweetcheeks, rockstar, cool kid, sweetheart

Adam:

now adam and lou aren't as close as lou x george and lou x ross but he's still one of her best friends

adam is the person she goes to if she needs an honest opinion, he is the The “tell it like it is” friend and she is so appreciative of that: often the other boys' opinions can be clouded by how much they love her, adam always had a fair mind about her

And tbh she was that for him too, he remembers when he confided in Lou about his worries about carly in his relationship (very early on in their relationship), he told her how he was worried carly would leave him becuase they could never have a 'normal' relationship, they'd always be on tour, swarmed with fans, fans who (despite their sweet intentions) would always want to know everything about their relationship, Lou all but smacked him round the head, telling him he was being ridiculous, that he'd never find another like carly, someone who was so loving and accepting of everyone she met, told him he might as well marry her and that his thoughts although valid, were just thoughts, and that the realistic state of things was that carly was going to love him regardless.

he is someone who watches on the sidelines, showering her with love and affection and his admiration in his own way, often by doing simple things like "i got you xyz thing because i remember you mentioned it"

he loves how she makes carly feel welcome, always the first to talk to her and ask how she is (carly and hann and agreed that they'd ask her to be godmother)

he's not often one to be cuddly with her but when he is it means so much more

they are the type of friends who dont have superficial conversations, their conversations are much more meaningful than that

he knows she'd do anything to protect him, carly and the baby that is on the way and is so thankful to her for that

she likes how in depth their conversations are, everyone knows hann as this guy that doesn't talk much but the two of them often talks for hours

he's one of those friends that tells these cracking jokes out of the blue that makes everyone die of laughter

nicknames: she ofc calls him Hann, she teasingly starts calling him daddy, he mainly calls her Lou tbh, sometimes calls her rockstar too

[arudoe]

Ok, first of all I have to say that I love your art style, it's just so comforting idk how to explain it but it's really really really nice

Also I saw your bruise wallpaper hc and you are so right, but which other hc do you have of them??

OMG ueueue thank you so much that is so sweet of you 😢😢

and also im soo glad you liked my silly hc hehe because i have so many its not normal actually

i made a post the other day with some of my hcs (this one) but i have plenty more!! so um enjoy 🦈

- they are both autistic (i infected them /j)

- my jay is transmasc ! (cole too sometimes depending on how i feel)

- they dont rly do petnames only like mean nicknames that are said with very much love and affection (like dummy stink fartface yk…)

- i feel like they do everything together like train play video game even when theyre doing separate things theyre tgt… like its always cole AND jay and never just them seperate… always team up for missions and everything… when they arent together the others will go wheres your other half haha stuff like that also they bicker all the timr and never say anything to each other but when the other isnt around they always talk so fondly about each otjer and 😭😭 it makes me wanna puke /pos

- they have very different music tastes (i hc jay listens to kpop and cole to 80s rock & new wave) and theyll always talk about how bad the others music taste is but secretly they actually like it… (jays kpop playlist got a save once and he was trying to figure out who it was and cole was like whoever it is has the worst music taste in the world) (it was cole who saved it) (also vice versa)

- they play every game and watch every show together and when one of them starts something without the other they get offended 😭😭

- speaking of watching cole cant handle anything scary at all but sometimes jay will somehow convince him to and always puts on the scariest stuff because he thinks its cute when cole jumps 😭

- jay still sleeps with his plushies so when they cuddle jay is spooning his plush and cole is spooning him and sometimes cole lays on jays chest

- they playfight and wrestle a lot and sometimes get seriously hurt while doing it

- they play dancing games tgt… like just dance and ddr

- also i think jay deffo dances to stim (totally not self projecting here) and his dance moves are always a bit silly so cole will copy them and jay is like are my making fun of me >:( and cole is like yeah maybe i am

- on the topic of stims they deffo mimic each other a whole lot in the sense theyll copy each others vocal stims and it annoys the hell out of everyone else because theyll say the same silly phrase over and over again for weeks 😭😭

- i also hc them both as chronically ill (jay is hypermobile and cole has arthritis) and sometimes after especially hard training days they will give each other back rubs/massages…

- they arealso borh very smart separately but when you put them together they become super stupid and lose all their brain cells

UMM okay this is kinda long so ill leave it here i have like a million more but id sit here forever writing them so 😭😭😭 once again im rly happy for ur question im kind of obsessed with them if u cant tell but um yea… enough yapping from me… adios..

[go-to-the-mirror]

Hello, @a-mag-a-day. Apologies for the deception but I rather wanted to make sure you started reading, so I thought it best not to announce myself. I'm assuming you're alone; you always did prefer to read your statements in private. I wouldn't try too hard to stop reading; there's every likelihood you'll just hurt yourself. So just listen. Now, shall we turn the page and try again?

Statement of landscaping-your-mind regarding episode 160 of The Magnus Archives.

Statement begins.

So, from all the stuff I scheduled for today you can probably tell I really like episode 160 of The Magnus Archives, right? Like, good lord, it is... it is a time. (Also, the words were really good (and also there's poetry) so :D incentive!)

Firstly, though, I have to say something. It's not the Watcher's Crown. The Watcher's Crown is the ritual Jonah Magnus attempted years ago. This is unnamed in canon, but Jonny said it could've been called The Magnus Archives.

Secondly... I would like to draw your attention towards the description of the youtube version of this episode. (to paraphrase)

The Magnus Archive discovers that some escapes are a lot easier than others.

Ahahahahaha AHAHAHAAHAHAH WHAT-

I hate this so much. Like, with a burning passion. "The Magnus Archives discovers that some escapes are a lot easier than others" COME TO MY HOME AND KILL ME YOU COWARD! It just hurts, it just... hurts.

He can escape London, but he can't escape his ✨ purpose ✨

You ever think about how The Magnus Archives follows the story of Magnus' Archive? I do. A lot. I haven't even started listening yet, god, this episode am I right?

MARTIN (Joking) Or, (huffed laugh) or it is, and she just cleaned it up really well. (They both make uncomfortable chuckles) ARCHIVIST …Yes. (The Archivist makes an uneasy noise)

THEYRE BOTH SO AWKWARD THEY HAVEN'T TALKED TO A NORMAL HUMAN IN OVER A YEAR

Just their really awkward laughter, oh my godd they're so endearing your honour, I'm so glad this episode and TMA ends at the 5 minute mark (< in denial)

ARCHIVIST Hopefully a long way out there. (soft) But I think we’re okay

THEY ARE IN LOVE YOUR HONOUR

I just love how soft Jon's voice gets around Martin, like, like, eeeee i just love them i love them they're the reason im aro bc i know i will never love someone romantically as much as jmart loves each other /j

MARTIN Oh, n-no, not yet. I was actually gonna head down into the village to go pick something up?

Ooooh yay I get to share my "where are they in scotland" headcanons! I think they're near Dunnet, because it's pretty far north and in the Highland area, and it's also got allegedly the only full time gunshop north of Inverness, and... yknow, it is Daisy's safehouse.

ARCHIVIST Anyway, don’t tell me the phonebox down there doesn’t appeal to your retro aesthetic.

your honour they're lightheartedly teasing each other <3

ARCHIVIST I’ll be fine.

SOFT!

(update im wrtinging with a cat on my lap now hes big. im balancing my computer on my leg.)

MARTIN I assume it’s her attempt at a- a, a varied diet? Eating your greens, you know? ARCHIVIST (Amused) Probably. (reassured) I’m sure it’ll work fine

hhh them <3 it's just like they're so... they're happy. they're so happy, and it's like nothing gold will stay or whatever

they had such a short amount of time

i wish they were ok

MARTIN …I will give you some privacy. Go for a walk. ARCHIVIST (Warmly) Let me know if you see any good cows. MARTIN Obviously I’m going to tell you if I see any good cows.

I'm...

them being happy is almost worse, right. because what once was a surprise we now know will happen, we have to deal with the dread, and it's all bitter now, the happiness is rotten because of what lurks after.

some people can listen to the first five minutes and feel okay, but me?

for me it just hurts.

ARCHIVIST (CONT’D) (Pleasantly) Statement of Hazel Rutter regarding a fire in her childhood home. Original statement given August 9th, 1992. Audio recording by Jonathan Sims, The Archivist. Statement begins.

He sounded so happy... he sounded so happy.

This is the first time he's happy before he reads a statement. He was happy, he was hiding from the police and the hunters and Daisy and Not!Sasha with his boyfriend in Scotland. And then, and then Jonah Magnus comes in and decides to end the world like a bastard.

I don't want to hit play. I don't want to know what comes next. I want to stop listening. I want Jon and Martin to be okay. I want it to be the real statement of Hazel Rutter.

I just want it to be the real statement of Hazel Rutter.

I get it, right, horror tragedy! This was the desired effect. I am supposed to be feeling these emotions. These emotions being very sad. Well done to Jonny, lovely writing. Fantastic! I love TMA with my whole heart. I think that it's fantastic. I don't want to hit play though. I'm here for the characters suffering, I got in through The Hermit Archives, I wanted more of the horror! I am here for suffering! I'm here for the suffering. I'm hitting play.

Statement of Jonah Magnus regarding Jonathan Sims, The Archivist. Statement begins.

He could have just ended the world. Like, the whole... forcing Jon to monologue about all the times he was manipulated into furthering Jonah's plan? That's fucked. That is fucked. Just put the ritual there you slimy piece of shit!

It’s rare that you get the chance to monologue through the voice of another, and you can’t tell me you’re not curious.

*me to my dog, in the "talking to a dog" voice* You wanna kill him too! Hey! You wanna kill him too!

Like, okay, so you're Jon and you're reading this statement and you can't stop, and this bastard says "you can't tell me you're not curious." Tell me that's not going to make him think that if he tried a little harder then he would've been able to stop reading. Tell me that's not going to make him think that a part of him wanted to end the world, and that's why he's still reading. Tell me that's not going to make him blame himself even more.

The only way to ensure I did not suffer the tribulations of what I believed to be an inevitable transformation was to bring it about myself.

He's so bloody arrogant. He puts himself above the entire world. It makes sense, he's from Regency era England, but like, it's still... really awful. Awful person.

Beyond that, I was getting older, and mortality began to weigh more heavily on my mind. How much in this world is done because we fear death, the last and greatest terror?

When I fear death I distract myself, not try to end the world. Like, this guy is just so evil. His only redeeming quality is being funny sometimes.

Everyone dies, Jack Magnet, you just chose to be a bastard about it.

Of course, I had to make sure the location was kept under my control while I worked on revising my plans, and so I moved the organization I had founded to assist in my research down to London, and the Institute as you know it, was born.

Right, so The Magnus Protocol's Magnus Institute was located in Manchester, and I'm not an expert on the geography of the United Kingdom, and basically know nothing about Manchester, bar that it has the... football, I want to say, team Manchester United? I don't know how I know that. But it seems as though Jonah Magnus didn't attempt his ritual, or attempted it some other way in that universe.

You see, the role of Archivist has been part of the Beholding for as far back as my research can go. This isn’t uncommon for the Powers; most of the beliefs around them are guesswork and fallible human interpretation, but there are certain through lines and consistencies that can be spotted, regardless of the trappings.

I wonder what the others are. The Dancer could be one - The Dancer in The Unknowing. I think Jonny said in a QnA, but you know, the author is dead, he's speaking to us posthumously, that The Architect could have been one. Not sure what others. If y'all have any ideas... 👀

More than once I thought she must secretly be of the Hunt; but there was never that sick joy in her, that thrill of predator and prey. She had simply decided that this was her position in life, and went about it with a practicality that even I found disconcerting at times.

Ok, Mr. Jonah "orchestrates twelve traumatising events for this one guy and gets him to end the world" Magnus. He cannot talk, he cannot talk at all. Sure, she sacrificed people, but she wasn't malicious. She did it for a cause. Did she believe she was good? I'm not sure she cared.

Jonah Magnus is just awful for his own self gain.

You see, the thing about the Fears is that they can never be truly separated from each other. When does the fear of sudden violence transition into the panic of hunted prey? When does the mask of the Stranger become the deception of the Spiral? Even those that seem to exist in direct opposition rely on each other for their definition as much as up relies on down. To try and create a world with only the Buried makes as much sense as trying to conceive a world with only down.

Gerry's colour explanation makes a lot of sense if you don't conceive of it as a traditional colour wheel. They're growing out in every direction, they all overlap with each other.

Sure, the fear of The Eye may seem in direct opposition to the fear of The Stranger, but let's take Jon, for instance. Is it not sort of Stranger to have some guy in a coffee shop staring at you with his autistic eyes, a person you don't know, but who definitely knows you?

What about the fear of The Buried and the fear of The Vast. Episode 195 covers that pretty handily. They're all interconnected with all of the others. Separating them makes them easier to understand (and invertedly makes them actually separated), but it isn't them, not truly. They are connected intrinsically.

Even the coffin! The fear of being alone in the dark is a part of the coffin.

Because the thing about the Archivist is that, well, it’s a bit of a misnomer. It might, perhaps, be better named: The Archive. Because you do not administer and preserve the records of fear, Jon. You are a record of fear, both in mind as you walk the shuddering dread of each statement, and in body as the Powers each leave their mark upon you. You are a living chronicle of terror.

I've been doing a lot of thinking about this. The Archivist is something... defined by how they feed their patron, but The Archive is defined by how they've been hurt to bring it into the world. He's not defined by even a person-like role, he's something molded by Jonah Magnus' desires to end the world.

I wrote a little poem about it, which I shall share here, because I am cringe but I am free, unlike Jon. RIP

He's not a person with a name, He's a vessel of destruction, He's not a person who feels pain, It's necessary for production, That he's scarred and marked, By things that lurk in the dark, Believe himself useless, Or it'll be fruitless, And at the end of the day, He's no person, no name, He's a plan that has come to fruition.

Also, he calls himself The Archivist, perhaps viewing himself as... something that hurts others, rather than something that is hurt for a purpose.

I’ll admit, my options were somewhat limited, but my god, when you came to me already marked by the Web, I knew it had to be you. I even held out some small hope you had been sent by the Spider as a sort of implicit blessing on my whole project and, do you know what, I think it was.

"I chose you" "I'll admit, my options were somewhat limited" Mr. Magnet, he was chosen by the web. Jonah's just not afraid to be puppeted.

So, when Jane Prentiss attacked, I watched eagerly, one hand on the gas release from the start.

This line fucked me up. "One hand on the gas release from the start." Just... like it just sticks in my mind. How he held all their lives in the palm of his hand, how he let Sasha die, and Tim get eaten by worms, because he wanted his bloody perfect Archive.

One hand on the gas release from the start, while all of them almost - or did - die(d).

Like, what gets me is how fucked up Jon was afterwards, how he was asking everyone for their statements, shutting them up before they got to the part where they'd mention Jon and Tim getting eaten with worms. What gets me is how Elias was there and Jon was what, looked like a bloody mummy! He didn't have second thoughts when he saw...

He knew everything. He saw everything. He saw how fucked up Jon was over e v e r y t h i n g. (everything)

That's what gets me.

Between the stabbing and at least two desperate flights into its door, you’re marked very deep by the Spiral.

And, you know, the manipulation, the gaslighting, the betrayal. I saw an interesting post on this, but I can't seem to find it. I'll look in the posts I've rbed tagged TMA meta, I'll link it in a reblog if I find it.

Honestly, I had nothing to do with Melanie and her Slaughter adventure, but when I saw the situation, I made sure to trap her here, so whenever her rage bubbled over you were right there, a ready target.

You know after Jon's second kidnapping that could have totally been resolved how Jonah made Jon stand in front of Melanie while she wanted to kill Jonah with a knife, and how it's like oh, right, yeah, use Jon as a bloody meat shield to get her angry at him, make him the scapegoat, that was intentional. It was intentional to destroy everyone in the Archives' interpersonal relationships, and then have Jon. A ready target for hatred and vitriol.

How is Martin, by the way? He looks well. You will keep an eye on him when all this is over, won’t you? He’s earned that.

I think that Jonah Magnus should eat shit and die.

The power of the Ceaseless Watcher flows through you, and the time of our victory is here.

If you replace the Ceaseless Watcher with Determination then it reads like an Undertale save.

* The power of Determination flows through you, and the time of our victory is here.

Don’t worry, Jon. You’ll get used to it here, in the world that we have made.

This also ties in with the above, I hate that he says "our victory" "the world that we have made." Jon didn't consent to this, Jon didn't want this, Jon was made to be an unwilling conduit of the apocolypse and Jonah Magnus is insinuating that he chose it, the victim blaming little prick!

You who watch and know and understand none. You who listen and hear and will not comprehend. You who wait and wait and drink in all that is not yours by right. Come to us in your wholeness. Come to us in your perfection. Bring all that is fear and all that is terror and all that is the awful dread that crawls and chokes and blinds and falls and twists and leaves and hides and weaves and burns and hunts and rips and bleeds and dies! Come to us. I OPEN THE DOOR!

GREAT INCANTATION! 10/10! And it's actually recitable, unlike the TBI one.

ARCHIVIST Look at the sky, Martin. Look at the sky. It’s looking back.

That is a fucking fantastic final line of the episode. All of it, four seasons leading up to this moment. Look at the sky. It's looking back.

Fuck dude!

(The Archivist begins a fractured, delirious, humourless, laugh that does not end)

That laugh.

That laugh is just... haunting. I love it so much. It makes me want to cry. I used to have it saved on my phone and I'd just listen to it over and over and over again and get more and more disturbed and heartbroken.

That laugh. That broken, horrific laugh.

I can't get over it.

And thus ends season 4 of The Magnus Archives. With a broken laugh in front of a window, leading out to the doomed world.

Episode 160 is quite possibly my favourite metaplot episode of The Magnus Archives, the way the whole plan was revealed, the awful manipulations that were exposed... that laugh.

I leave you all to think on this. To think on the Archive née the Archivist née Jonathan Sims, laughing at the world he has unwillingly and unwittingly doomed.

Goodnight, a-mag-a-day, goodnight. /ref

[hiemaldesirae]

I read it and omg it turned out amazing like the way you described Valentino’s and Velvette’s demon form has a chokehold on me I never really see people portray Velvette as an actual doll too much it’s mostly just a comment that’s it so you just going all out on that was so good and Valentino being the one with the cool head during this was nice but also fitting normally people would make Val a brainless idiot or a manipulative dick so him being just calm and strangely scary was a nice change but I can totally see him being more like a evil all his moves are calculated type overlord whenever someone he honestly cares about is at stake or hurt we really just need more found family vees but Vox literally just letting himself get kidnapped was such a pleasant surprise I didn’t expect myself to be so spot on about the fact Vox really has more control over the situation and don’t get me started on Alastor I just love the way you always give Vox and Alastor a muse x painter dynamic so this story was just the epitome of that trope but come on Alastor don’t be stingy let the vees go to y’all’s wedding another thing I love dramatic stories but it’s always so funny thinking what the other characters think like can you imagine Charlie’s confusion when Vel says he kidnapped Vox and he just like yeah I did lol Lucifer coming in to save Charlie he probably doesn’t really care about what’s happening let alone knows. Lucifer needing a reminder on who Velvette and Valentino are but recognizes Vox instantly gives off Adam not knowing who Alastor is but knows angel also I need to know what Charlie and Alastor talked about when he left the room cause I know nothings good gonna come out

haha thank you!! i based velvettes demon form off those like, old stories about those haunted dolls like annabelle and such. i think the dichotomy between a sinners regular and demon form is such an interesting concept to explore- i think personally that a sinner's demon form is their 'true' self-- since so many sinners and overlords especially wear a mask to hide their true faces, when they turn to their full demon form they shed that mask in a sense. from vals actions in masquerade, i developed this headcanon that val is the type of person who throws little tantrums for fun, but when he gets Really angry, his anger is cold and calculating more than anything. in that way, he's a lot like vox, except... well, vox is able to keep more of a lid on things most of the time because he Has To as the face of the vees. so yeah, i def agree with you! found family vees really does have my heart, they're the worst and they love each other <3

yesyesyes to all of the radiostatic dynamics!! theyre both horrible terrible posessive freaks but in my mind alastor wouldnt have been able to take him away from home if vox hadnt at least given a verbal okay at first, he's too much of a fighter to go without a struggle lol. and yeah i feel like i spent a looot of time on the other characters povs solely bc they were so much fun to write lmao. like.... imagine being charlie and having to watch this all go down meanwhile youre thinking 'awww its so sweet' no. this is like black swan levels of psychological horror and you are going to watch it all go down live

[lilyrizzy]

“sorry just some insane hc’s about how in my head they have sex constantly lol and they both like, get off so much on like, daniel just coming up behind max in the kitchen to pull his sweats down and fuck him, max barely needing any prep bc they fuck so much” KILL ME!!! Ok this is sort of a prompt but pls feel free to ignore—I think this is literally soooo hot but I’m also like 👀 at taking it to another level where they do this even when they’re not on the best terms? Like in the middle of a days-long fight where they’ve barely said a word to each other (like about something silly like maybe max did something rly dangerous during a race and Daniel is upset bc he doesn’t know what he would do if max got hurt) but even still they need each other so much they fuck like that anyway,..maybe they go to bed mad at each other but Daniel can’t fall asleep bc his mind is racing so he wakes max up and just starts fucking him then let’s him go back to sleep….ok I’ll stop lol sorry :/

wow anon, your amazing brain. thoughts below the cut!

cw: free use, & ‘starting sex while one person is sleeping’ (i can never spell the fancy kink name for it lol sorry). also please please don't read if you think you won't like what those cw’s might mean

okay, so i can see this working especially if they have a 'free use' situation of max in place. and because they're both so horny for each other constantly, i think max is always free use, it's a 24/7 thing. they have their safe word or something that means they want to pause or stop or whatever, but other than that, max is daniel's for the taking.

(max definitley saw the title 'free use' in a porn vid or something they watched together and asked daniel 'what's that?' daniel explained, palms sweating bc he knew the moment max found out, he'd ask if they could do that, and daniel would be too weak for max to say no < side note lol, i think the porn they'd each watch alone vs together is such an interesting discussion point >)

and as you correctly stated, even when they're mad at each other they still need each other. so much. daniel made a dumb joke once, him in perth, max in monaco, that he was sleeping badly without max because he needed to be 'emptied,' before before bed and max just took that so seriously while simultaneously thinking it was the hottest thing ever and that it proved how well matched they were, bc he always slept better with daniels come inside him too :)

so going back to being mad, oops, yes, lets say max drove like an idiot and daniel is mad because its easier to let himself feel that than like, crushing fear, and this makes max get defensive and say shit he doesn't mean like, 'it is none of your buisness how i drive daniel, we are not on the same team anymore.' cue a lot of slammed doors and stony silence.

they've still not spoken and bed time is approaching. daniel is winding himself up by watching race highlights, and ofc its all about max's [insert dangerous race manouvere here, idk, i watch this sport for the fanfiction], and he's replaying the video over and over, while looping max's words over too in his head, 'none of your buisness,' and he thinks, you little shit, ill show you 'none of my buisness.' and is on his feet then to find max

who is brushing his teeth, meeting daniel's eyes in the mirror, and noticing theyre dark. thinks oh okay, good, lets sort this out, but says something bitchy onces he's spat out his toothpaste like, 'i thought you were sleeping on the sofa.' (fyi neither one of them has ever slept on the sofa, no matter how mad lol). then daniel is crossing the room, one hand curling around max's hip, the other on the back of his neck, pushing him down until his cheek is pressing against the bathroom counter. says something mean but kinda sexy like, 'i think you need reminding why i wanna keep you around enough to worry,' then like, pushes max’s pyjama bottoms down, swipes his fingers across max's hole, feeling he's still wet from the 'youre an idiot but i love you' sex they had right after the race and pushes two fingers in, 'who else is going to need it so bad they keep themselves open and ready for me, hmm?'

so then daniel fucks him, max’s hot pink face pressed against the cool tile, the slapping sound of daniel’s thrusts loud in the bathroom. max comes untouched when daniel calls him his ‘sl*t’ and says like, ‘what would i do if i didn’t have this tight little place to put my load each night?’ and then comes in him as if to prove a point but also to prove to himself that like, its okay. max can still take him bc max is still here.

sometimes thats enough. sometimes its not. lets say this time, max is being stubborn, because he knows this time he was actually in the wrong a little by being kinda mean to daniel back so he like, doubles down in his rightous anger. so daniel offers him a smile after, in the mirrow again, but max is ignoring him, just pulling his pyjama bottoms back up and shoving past him to get into bed.

and when they try to go to sleep like that, still pissed at each other, it just feels so wrong. daniel can't sleep for real now, not because of no sex, they had sex, but because he hates this. hates not talking, just looking at the hard line of max's back, where its usually the sweet curve of his tits he gets to see, max facing him, face smashed into the pillow as he snores.

so he’s whispering, ‘max?’ and not getting an answer. he doesnt know its bc max is stubborn or bc hes really asleep, but- but they’ve done this before so he knows its okay to push his pyjama bottoms down again, to groan a little seeing how max is shiny, sticky there. didnt clean himself up, didn’t let daniel do it with his tongue and daniel wants to fix that starts lapping at max softly until max is letting out little puffs of air, barely-there whimpers. then daniel is rubbing his dick along the crack of max’s ass, asking, ‘can i have you again, baby?‘ and max is pushing back against him which is answer enough.

this time, daniel holds him gently, spooned up right behind him, just grinding over his prostate until max is trembling, shaking in his arms so over stimulated. and right before max comes, he whines out, ‘i love you, i am sorry,’ and then daniel is coming too, into the warm clutch of max’s body and it’s okay again because max is here and safe and neither of them are mad anymore :)

[creedslove]

omfg we need dave confessing feelings in a fight with reader and then its sex omgg and then theyre just in bed cuddling talking about their love and maybe future??

Dave York x f!reader

A/N: omg bestie, I love Dave York 😍

• Dave was usually an impatient person towards everyone, except you

• you were his baby girl and for that man to lose his patient with you, you would have to infuriate him

• which you did, when you gave some guy at a bar your number

• but in fact, you didn't do that, your sister did it. You two were out for a girls' night when a guy approached you and even if you had showed him absolutely no interest, the moment you walked to the bar, she gave him your number

• you told your boyfriend it was just a silly joke, but you two knew damn well it wasn't: your sister didn't like Dave at all and had always been against your relationship with him

• she didn't exactly why she didn't like him, perhaps it was the fact he was divorced, a little older than you and he had a job he was always so mysterious about, even if she didn't know the whole truth, she already disliked him

• and Dave wasn't a big fan of hers either, because no matter how much he reminded himself he needed to respect your relationship with your sister and be patient, she was always coming up with shit like that to keep the two of you apart

• and even if you had explained Dave what happened at the bar, he was still angry, pissed and trying really hard to hold himself back and not yell at you

• you knew all about Dave's real job and you weren't scared of him at all, you knew he would never hurt you, but judging by his reaction, you were scared he would break up with you

"how many times do I have to tell you I'm sorry? Dave, she gave him my number without my permission! I told that guy I had a boyfriend!"

"and yet he was calling you, y/n! That's fucked up! Would you be okay with some random woman I met at a bar calling after me?"

"I wouldn't!!! But I would trust you because I know you would be telling me the truth if you said you didn't give her your number!!! I already blocked his number anyway, he's never calling me again, what else do I have to do so you believe me? Why are you so angry?"

"because I fucking love you, y/n! Is this a good enough reason? I love you, and no one thinks I'm good enough for you, not even your sister is capable of supporting us, she'd rather throw you into any guy's arms than let me have you!"

• and just like that he accidentally blurted out his feelings

• he wasn't one of hiding his feelings but at the same time he hadn't planned on admitting them in the middle of a fight

• but when your sad expression was replaced by a soft smile and you gently placed your hands on his cheeks and pecked his lips, confessing him you also loved him, all that anger he felt simply went away

• and he took you into his arms, kissing you and before the two of you realized, you were stripping each other naked and having sex

• but you also noticed it wasn't the usual sex you two had, there was more to it, not simply lust, instead, you two made love

• and once you were both resting in each other's arms, you played with Dave's hair while he kissed down your neck, still not wanting to let go of your body

"I knew I loved you for a long time..."

• he told you against your skin which made you smile

"I knew it too, I've loved you since we met, Dave, no matter what happens I'll still love you"

"I'm going to look for a house, a real nice one, with a garden, swimming pool, a lot of space... I'm tired of this apartment, it's too empty for me to live alone and yet, it's too small for you to move in with me, so with a house we can finally be comfortable and you'll leave your sister's place and she will stop interfering in our relationship"

"if you're asking me to move in with you, Dave, my answer is yes"

• Dave smiled and pecked your lips once more. He would find yourselves a nice house, have you move in with you and then he could finally ask you to marry him officially, this time he knew it was for real

____

[livepoultryfreshkilled]

i'm well aware this is divorced from the original purpose of zombies but as they exist in modern pop culture and general knowledge i'd like to talk about my personal, emotional experience with them. the idea that is. never met a zombie in real life that i know of

okay so i do not like the walking dead, zombieland, apocalyptic horror (just taste based, not my thing, more anxiety/despair inducing than scary) but flicks like night of the living dead, RETURN OF THE LIVING DEAD (!!), general concepts of zombies always terrify and enthrall me. the things that have always terrified me abt zombies have been

the degredation of your own humanity and loss of control over ur body and

the kind of suffocating inevitability of the real monster being the virus, because you can kill a zombie but you cant really kill a virus.

this of course has been obviously effected by the current pandemic, which has shown me how inescapable the need for human spaces and contact is, and how many people can be capable of infecting you at once. like just hordes of other human beings. werewolves are wolves and vampires are vampires but zombies are (often) dead people without the capacity for reason. just the loss of yourself not thru death but thru zombification and the lack of humanity in the enemy. there is only so much you can do to keep from being sick, and i fear and dread societal collapse in media, i hate loss i hate it when people don't have their things and i hate when they can't be with each other. as a child i developed a mild agoraphobia until i reasoned that zombies can't climb stairs so any elevated location is safe because people are all over this planet. theyre everywhere! zoo wee mama!

when i say scared i mean my kind of primal childhood fear reactions, because i had a really very bad fear of zombies when i was a smalltime. in terms of now, my conscious view of them, yall know i love izombie and i love in the flesh too, when it comes to classic monsters i pick zombies over vampires and werewolves. this is because i

always feel the need to pay attention to whatever or whoever is getting the least attention. it makes me sad that nobody wants to be a zombie because what if zombies saw that wouldnt they be sad. they dont have any powers they're the underdog here and that's my archetype

generally develop fixations on or fetishes for the things that scare me the most. i feel like me and zombies have been through a lot, they're the monster i grew up thinking about because i was scared of them, and there's this belief i have that monsters won't hurt you if you're kind to them instead of afraid, so it's sort of a coping thing i suppose

i think decay rot and disease and grossness and corruption of the flesh and dead bodies are sick + awesome + cool. totally rules. i LOVE the idea of conscious zombies because to experience the degredation and destruction of your body, but not through pain (werewolves) and to experience your own death but not in the sense of living beyond death alone, stretching into immortality (vampires) but like, being a corpse watching those around you treat you like one but feeling and thinking everything a human does is crazy. eating brains is crazy, thats thoughts, you cant feed on someone you love like a vampire that is permanently destructive and repulsive and messy. awesome

and so ends my catechism (i am going to keep talking about this)