itd be so funny if mike had an arc where he was trying NOT to tell will he loves him in s5
like the irony of going from struggling aggressively to tell his gf he loved her and only saying it in the heat of the moment when hes not sure if she can hear
to a blushy geniuenly in love mike who is afraid to say ily because he doesnt want to put will in the position he was in. even though theyve been best friends for so long he feels like it has extra weight to it and doesnt know when “too soon” is so hes constantly tripping over his words.
(will definitely notices too but he doesnt say anything. hes afraid to be presumptious but also he thinks mike is adorable. everytime it happens will just gets all smilely, and when mike finally does say it will says it back almost immediately.)
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So I just started playing In Stars and Time because I got curious about the sad little blorbo you occasionally post about and afshdjdkrn
I just. Wanna hug them. So badly 😭
Siffrin isat my everything my cinnamon fucking apple WKDNWKDNEKEKSK HE IS SOOOOO SQUISHABLE...... THEY NEED A HUG SO BAD I LOVE THEM SO MUCH
Incredibly pleased im helping spread the isat propaganda like the dev rlly just Made a whump fic in video game format huh....... for tumblr girlies by a tumblr girlie.... my gods we respect the grind as if i could EVER be normal abt that
I'll be so real ive already written little tidbits for a longer au oneshot i want to write in between chapters of hunger au, and the exercise in 2nd person pov is SO MUCH FUN im enjoying myself immensely :] here, a snippet for both fun and profit (and more fun):
"Siffrin...." Odile says, and it strikes a sour chord, a ripple of dissonance that screws rivets around your chest and tightens. She shouldn't have to say your name like that, with that kind of weight— as if all the Craft in the world isn't enough to carry it. Pure reflex ducks your chin into the collar of your cloak; you avert your gaze back to the rubble-littered floor of the tunnel, tracing dark crags in the stone where sputtering torchlight fails to reach.
There you go again, stardust. Loop's voice is an ephemeral echo in your ears, a byproduct of months, years worth of past loops gone by. It isn't real. Gone and made yourself another person's problem.
It isn't real.
"— need you to start taking this more seriously." Odile bites out each word with the same deportment of a dog tearing off chunks of meat, clipped and cutting. Her brows knit together, mouth pulling down in a sharp curve; the lines around her eyes are tight, carved from the knife's edge of her own disappointment.
Her disappointment in you.
You almost miss the next sentence as well. "I have no way of helping you if you don't speak to me," she says. "And when you minimize these things you went through— you realize that's going back on your word, yes? Gems alive, Siffrin. We want to help."
You speak before your mind has caught up with your mouth, hundreds of loops sanding down the words into something practiced, rote. "But there's nothing to help me w—"
"Stop lying to me." Odile snaps, and your jaw shuts so fast you miss biting your tongue by a mere hair's-breadth. Your lungs threaten to buckle— inhale. Exhale. Come on, stardust, Loop's imaginary voice sneers, can't you do something as simple as breathe? Or are you just that blinding useless?
... Shut up.
Odile's eyes slip shut. She raises a hand to meet them, kneading at the soft skin between her brows. "I'm... sorry, Siffrin," she says, halting, stilted. "I shouldn't— that wasn't productive. I apologize."
Tentatively, you say: "You don't have to."
"Yes, I do." Odile straightens once again, tucking a strand of sweat-slicked hair back behind her ear with a grimace. "It's not... conversations like these are... hard. Yelling is pointless for both of us. I'm sorry."
"But you didn't—"
"Siffrin," she says, and this time the syllables of your name twist, a rise and fall that cracks wryly in the middle. One sharp eyebrow arches up into the canopy of her hairline. "You're supposed to say you accept the apology."
You stare. She stares right back.
Oh. She's serious.
"I..." you look down. "Um. Accept?"
"Excellent," Odile says brusquely, and bends to peer at an invisible speck of dirt clinging to her forearm. She brushes at it with absent, studious flicks, the epitome of single-minded focus. "Then now we can move on with our lives."
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i cant tell you how much i ADORE this first episode of my beautiful man s2. there’s something about the pace of it, especially in hira and kiyoi’s interactions, the quick back and forth, hira saying something, kiyoi catching him out, hira backing down, kiyoi getting mad about that, hira stuttering to try and say the right thing. the way they interact is this seemingly endless cat and mouse going in circles around this big, huge centre thing that is ‘the point’. they both want to convey so much but neither can put the plain and simple words to it, hira is too much and kiyoi is too little. and yet they still have these moments, when they let the plain truth slip, hira saying you’re just too cute, or kiyoi earnestly asking hira not to leave him, it peels back at their true sentiment that’s always being danced around.
and the thing is, if you didnt watch the first season, this relationship could so easily be seen as bad bad really bad, the way they almost bicker and get mad, how kiyoi appears to pick at hira and gets mad so easily, how hira acts more like an avoid stalker than a boyfriend and always seems on edge or off in his head catastrophising. some people still might. i can see how it can be a difficult relationship to digest. its weird, awkward and uncomfortable at times, and almost absent of the usual softness of a bl couple. but thats why i adore it. because i think its so important and interesting to portray a different kind of relationship, even if maybe exaggerated to fit the king and servent original premise that hira still holds onto. bc the thing with these kinds of relationships is it doesnt matter what we think of it, whether we like it or think its ok, its about the people in it. some people are just different, they act differently, and interact differently, and thats ok if its ok for the people involved, and thats what i think the case is for hira and kiyoi. obviously they still have problems, this relationship isnt perfect, and i think this series is gonna show that, but thats also ok. just bc a relationship isnt perfect, doesnt mean it shouldnt exist. there has to be something there in the first place for it to be worked on. and there is. at the core of it all, these two people really really love and care about each other, they just express it differently, and maybe need to learn how to express it in a way that makes it easier and better for the other to feel it. maybe hira needs to let kiyoi off that pedastal, and maybe kiyoi needs to not view his feelings as this weird, gross thing. but that takes time, and i think is truly worth it.
and what makes it work and so thrilling and interesting to watch as a show is that kiyoi and hira somehow both encourage that detrimenal behaviour but are also so incredibly good for each other, and good at challenging that behaviour. hira wants to see kiyoi as a god and kiyoi wants to be loved, so he can be that godly figure. you can see it in this almost entitled way he acts, pushing hira around, even when he just sits down in the rocking chair, above hira, very mch the image of a king and his bowing servent. as someone that was starved of love as a child, he laps that up. but its when his feelings grow for hira that he realises he doesnt want to be some god or king, he just wants plain and simple, human, equal love. so he ends that scene lying on hira’s lap, lower than him, airing his insecurities of being abandoned and asking hira to stay with him, very much that lonely child wanting someone else’s love. not devotion, not sacrifice, just love. and its his feelings for hira that allow him to push hira in a good way, challenge him, bring him out of his shell, which he desperately needs. hira is so stuck in his head that he hasnt reared his head enough to learn how to act like an actual person. so used to blending into the background, he doesnt know how to be his own person and not an object or a piece of the furniture. you see it at the party, that he doesnt know enough small talk words to get through a conversation, let alone actually be himself and interact with others on an equal level. thats why he takes on this servent role, bc he’s never seen himself as enough of a person to be anything else. he can only be made real when characterised by his actions for others. kiyoi’s rejection of these roles means he can challenge hira to step up, to be on his level, and in that find himself. there’s hints, you can see it, in his love of phtography, when he talks about the moon, when he’s around others and even kiyoi and they have these softer moments where it feels like hes breathing and calm instead of stuttering and panting through an interaction and his brain is running a mile a minute. kiyoi has seen it too, and thats why he fell in love with him. ok, maybe he likes his eccentricities too, but he sees a person that he wants to be with, on equal terms, and in that he wants to pull hira up and see him be himself, realise himself as a person, just as much as he has to step down. and they dont explain these things plainly, voice that they want to help each other in this way, but you see it so clearly. its the subtext of this almost other language that they speak together thats full of twisted meanings and hidden intentions, at the heart of it is, like i said before, actual love and care for each other. do they need to get better at it? yes. but do they need to become our idea of a normal relationship to do that? no, absolutely not. after all, hira will always be hira, and kiyoi will always be kiyoi, and if they lost that, they’d lose themselves and their love for each other. so stay weird, stay unconventional, and stay yourselves, my beautiful couple.
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