#this family's genes jfc

[thisishowgalaxiescollide]

[quiiescenza]

/

[suzukiblu]

Some assorted Smallville headcanons from some of my assorted WIPs for Plot Bunny. They did not specify which WIP they preferred, so I just picked a bunch of different ones and went from there! 

Smallville does not approve of Clark Kent’s parenting style: Smallville is a tight-knit, proud little community where everyone looks out for each other that is full of people who want to continue living in a tight-knit, proud little community where everyone looks out for each other. The population at large still considers Clark one of their temporarily-displaced own and were therefore very willing to pretend to believe the “cousin” story when “Conner” showed up–right up until they found out it was NOT a story meant to help Clark’s displaced kid he’d just found out about settle into the Kent family in a low-pressure environment while he got over whatever obvious trauma had happened to him. Now? Now there are pitchforks being sharpened and torches being lit. CLARK JOSEPH KENT, YOUR HOMETOWN IS NOT MAD, JUST DISAPPOINTED. 

Kara gets to Earth on time and the Kents get a two-for-one special on free kids: Smallville is pretty sure Jonathan and Martha did NOT get this emotionally-fraught teen mom and her weird but adorable little baby from any actual adoption agency, Norwegian or not, but what’s a little illegal immigration and identity fraud between neighbors? None of THEIR business, no sir. Especially not if any strangers ever show up in town asking QUESTIONS. 

Jon and Martha, professional soulparents: Oh Jon and Martha absolutely will be clearing out the attic to make Conner a bedroom the absolute SECOND they get back to Smallville. And also being heartbroken about Clark, obviously. Everyone in Smallville is going to cry on them when they hear about Conner and be both very sad and very happy for them. And then they’re all gonna be Weird About Conner, who isn’t gonna know how to talk to ANY of them. He’s gonna get his cheek pinched by so, so many old ladies and SO many manly back-claps and it’s gonna be a pain controlling his TTK enough to actually let people do it. Meanwhile, everyone in Smallville, internally: oh he’s exactly as weird as Clark was when he first showed up, noted. Jfc, Jon and Martha, AGAIN?? WHERE DO YOU EVEN FIND THESE KIDS. 

Kon is too trans for this pregnancy shit: No one in Smallville knew a thing about Kon’s physical sex, so they’re all gonna be VERY surprised very soon, but also Smallville in general is gonna take that whole reveal like CHAMPS and just roll with it, even if it might require some people having some Talks With Their Kids And/Or Slightly Bigoted Relatives. Like, there will be a few assholes and a few over-inquisitive weirdos around, because nowhere is a monolith, but overall Smallville is gonna roll with it and be chill about it while ALSO being incredibly out of touch with the up-to-date terminology/language and having very little grasp of the minutiae of queerness in general ( aside from a couple of very quiet people who are gonna feel a WAY about finding out that Conner Kent is trans and went completely unclocked all this time, and seeing how most of the town’s taking finding out really well, and does that maybe mean . . . ). 

the one where Kon isn’t the father: Smallville has politely not asked any questions about Tim aside from if he wanted a baby shower or not, but also ALL of Smallville knows Tim was Conner’s “boyfriend” and Kyra is “his” daughter. That’s just gossip-by-osmosis that all of Smallville knows. A lot of casseroles and crocheted things and quilts have happened to the Kent household since Tim showed up pregnant and traumatized. And baby stuff donations. And babysitting offers. And general helpfulness in general. People weren’t necessarily close to Kon, but a lot of people felt very bad about what HAPPENED to Kon, especially after finding out about Kyra. Not that any of them actually KNOW what actually happened to Kon or the truth about Kyra, but that’s a clone of a different gene donor, okay?? OKAY.

[br1ghtestlight]

random thought but i love eugene mirman's gene sounds ESPECIALLY when gene is sleeping. they're so good & cute

louise tina bob and linda looking @ gene literally exactly like this when he forgets how his song goes at breakfast LMAOO

love that tina and louise seem to actually pay attention to what songs gene is writing and what they're about despite the fact that there are SO MANY. supportive family <3

gene's dream.... bro that was god speaking to you. like for real wtf

also im only a minute in and there are SO MANY good screenshots already he's such a cutie i love him so much!!!! <3 gene episodes my beloved

"Now I'm going to change into last night's pajamas, AKA my only pajamas, and brush my teeth with Tina's toothbrush because that's what I accidentally did last night."

"Wait, what?"

gene and tina are so silly?? 😭

me and gene share many similarities including waking up in the middle of the night every two hours for no fucking reason. like THATS relatable

MR AMBROSE APPEARANCE LETS FUCKING GOOO‼️‼️ why does his voice sound slightly sped up is he okay. does he have a new voice actor?? he sounds slightly off not like in a bad way its just strange

THERE WAS A NEW VOICE ACTOR BCUZ BILLY EICHNER WASNT CREDITED maybe bcuz its such a small appearance but thats very weird. i feel like mickey fans in season 12 episode 6 when loren did that horrible mickey impression 😭😭 also whoever did his voice in this episode wasnt credited so it was somebody from the main cast doing an impression of him. will try to figure out who. sorry episode review cancelled i need to figure out who the hell voiced mr ambrose in this episode

based on the fact that u cant obviously tell who it is i dont think its eugene mirman and probably not h jon benjiman?? dan mintz can only do one voice so its not him either. probably either john roberts larry murphy or a random crew member who they didnt bother to credit

(most likely billy eischner just wasn't avaliable to voice mr ambrose due to his movie career etc so i dont blame them but it was noticeable enough to ME that i needed to figure it out. not even a bad impression honestly the average fan wouldnt notice)

"What do you lucid dream about?"

"I do revenge stuff on people who were mean to me in high school, some fantasy and science fiction, some adult stuff I can't tell you about."

this is literally the gayest thing mr ambrose has ever said omg FHFMDDJKSKS i cant believe this drama club ass nerd was bullied in high school who could have guessed. not me thats for sure

(now somebody has to write a fanfic about mr ambrose having Adult Stuff dreams about mr frond. i want this on my desk by 3pm tomorrow)

love mr ambrose and his gay ass curly hair..... mr ambrose my beloved <33 kisses u

i dont have anything to say im just strangely invested in gene's lucid dreaming plot at this point. Love all his silly little dreams and its incredible he never seems to have any nightmares or anything!!

this is reminding me of the movie where gene had a dream and he was scared that he wasn't good at music and that people weren't going to like his performance and the aliens came down to told him to stop 😭😭💔 his insecurity that he might not be that good a musician literally makes me cry. he's so sweet and kindhearted my babyy boy

CAN I SKIP SCHOOL AND GO BACK TO SLEEP LMAO

"Even successful musicians went to sixth grade, Gene."

"That's a MYTH!!"

weirdly mr ambrose started sounding completely normal at some point like did his voice actor come back and just wasn't credited?? or whoever did this impression was REALLY good jfc

mr ambrose HATES these fuckign kids bro

HES SO UNHINGED LMAO 😭😭

NOT THE STARING AGAIN. why are they literally just this image every single time gene plays music in this episode im gonna cry

love this specific frame of gene running his hand through his hair

awww bob is such a good dad

sidenote but this subplot with tina and louise is so stupid it actually made me laugh LMAO the fucking girl cricket. thr female cricket. like what if he's gay huh what then

"or if she's not his type she also makes a great best friend. she's a good listener" THANK YOU louise for acknowledging the cricket might be gay. she's an ally 🙏

AWW GENE WRITING HIS SONG <3 eugene mirman isnt a Good singer (not hating he literally says that all the time. they have to record each line seperately bcuz he cant sing on key) so its hard to tell when they're trying to make gene's songs seem good or not but this is really sweet. u can tell he just loves music so much

why is gene's song kinda making me emotional..... like this show is usually 50/50 on if it actually wants to take gene's songwriting ability seriously but in this episode its so clear how much he LOVES music and songwriting and how talented he is at it. he has trouble with focus and commitment sometimes but thats never an issue when it comes to his music and he'd happily spend an entire afternoon writing a song from start to finish (even skipping out on dinner) because he was so hyperfocused. love how much respect they give gene in this episode tbh

deeply appreciate the "larry murphy as teddy" credit despite teddy not having one single line in this entire episode. Literally just a legacy credit at this point

I LOVED THIS EPISODE 😭😭💕 i dont think it'll be as widely popular as some other episodes this season but as a gene fan and an artist this episode really resonated with me. the ending sequence was actually really beautiful (gives me the same vibes as "your heart's not broken its only growing" tbh) and i loved gene's song and all the different costumes they put him in for his dreams!! tina and louise's subplot was really cute too. very enjoyable episode if you're a gene fan or just a casual viewer who wishes he got more focus. he's SO SWEET and so passionate <3

[interlagosed]

I know we talk about the Sainz genes but the VdC genes…………Jfc………….

Also you can just see from his ease how much the women in his family mean to him 🥺

[acrosstobear]

Lmao I cannot get over Haas' absolute COWARDICE to announce this shit at like 06h00. And I bet the higher ups will be hiding until the storm settles and Mick will be the one to do PR damage control, because he will do it, HE IS SUCH A GOOD PERSON, covering for a team who sacked him in favour of a has-been who has never even scored a podium and married a fucking influencer. JFC this sport has gone to shit, I'm gonna switch to football now.

yeah, Mick is literally contractually obligated to sit in a room in front of 100 reporters and answer questions in 3 hours. Gene's probably fast asleep and Guenther is going to hide in hospitality all day. and youre exactly right -- Mick will be firm about his passion and his desire and drive to return but he will be thinking about all of the families that are behind the Haas machine and he will refrain from saying a single bad word about the team. he'll talk about his disappointment but won't get angry. just for once. get angry for me buddy.

[namimikan]

honestly, kind of weird episode finale, but el oh el. troi should have counselled every frozen human tbh, not just the housewife who openly grieved for her deceased family tbh. maybe would have been a more boring episode, but like.

nobody was especially sympathetic to these three humans who had woken up in the future, which is sad tbh. for sure, gene roddenberry's vision, the future is much more haughty towards the ~present day~ but like, jfc. these are the people you choose to condemn?

[suckitsurveys]

Words that rhyme with HALLOWEEN! 🎃 👻 by joybucket

Do you celebrate Halloween? 🎃 👻 Oh yes. Describe some of the best Halloween decorations you have ever seen. The coolest ones I’ve seen lately are Stranger Things themed houses. Have you ever dressed up as a Queen? 👸 No. …and if not, would you ever want to dress up as a queen? Eh, not really. Maybe Queen the band. Are you someone who is mean? No.

In the last costume you wore, was there any green? Nope. Do you know where exactly in your body is your spleen? I do. Have you gotten the COVID vaccine? 💉 Of course. Who in your family is or was a Marine? I don’t think anyone. Which name do you like best for a girl: Francine, Maureen, Jolene, Karlene, or Marlene? Francine or Jolene. Have you ever met anyone named Dean? Yes. What is one thing you wish you hadn’t seen? 👀 My brother in law’s face. Which name do you like best for a girl: Colleen, Kathleen, Eileen, Irene, or Janine? Irene. Did you you do anything special for your Sweet Sixteen? My sister organized a little surprise party at a pizza place with a few of my friends. What is your favorite beverage that includes caffeine? Matcha lattes. Have you ever had a friend named Christine? Acquaintances. Is your room clean? It needs some straightening up. What is one thing you find serene? Beaches. Have you ever had a friend named Selene? I had a friend named Selena in grade school. Do you own a washing machine? No. What is something you have accidentally put through a washing machine? Money. What are three things you have never been for Halloween? A super hero, anything racist, a clown. What are three things you disliked about being a teen? All of it. As a teen, did you ever read Seventeen magazine? Yeah. For support, on whom do you lean? My husband. About how many hours per day do you spend staring at a screen? 💻 📱 🖥 Almost all the hours. I work on a computer all day. Are you currently wearing jeans? 👖 Yes. On YouTube, are you a fan of Colleen? I was but I recently stumbled upon a reddit page about her and jfc. Not anymore. For shampoo, do you use Panteen? 🧴 No. Do you like the song Jolene? Yeah. When was the last time you applied sunscreen? 🧴 Sometime in September. Have you ever played the tambourine? Yeah. Not well, but I’ve played with one before. Do you like the color tangerine? Sure. Would you rather jump on a trampoline, read a magazine, or watch a movie on a big screen? Watch a movie on a big screen. Which color do you like better: tangerine or aquamarine? Aquamarine. Which name do you like best for a boy: Dean, Gene, Sheen, Eugene, or Bean? All of these suck. Would you rather eat a jelly bean or a tangerine? 🫘 🍊 Jelly bean. When was the last time you rode in a limousine? For a wedding years ago. What is your favorite foreign cuisine? Mexican or Asian. When it comes to crackers, do you like saltines? Sure. Are you addicted to nicotine? 🚬 No. Do you like the smell of gasoline? ⛽️ I do.

[thisishowgalaxiescollide]

[thebeautyofsolitude]

Alex Watson by Lucy Carr-Ellison

[drwcn]

For the man-eating mer! Yanli au, are there any ChengQing Wen Merbabies running around? Does Jin Ling and possible siblings share their mom's eating habits? Will Wen Yuan still be part of the Addams-esque family? Enquiring minds have an inquiry.

LOL, hi friend.

So only men of the Jiang family - despite being carriers themselves - can pass on their mer-gene, which means only Jiang Cheng's daughters will be mermaids, while Jiang Yanli's children won't.

But how can that be? It's not magic, my friends. If you wanna know how, I put a genetics explanation undercut. :P Sorry I geeked out a little.

Chengqing is in almost every au of mine LOL.

Just imagine Jiang Cheng building a pond/pool outside of his new daughter's bedchamber. Its bottom is paved with cobblestone with lotuses surrounding it on the outside as a fence. The water is connected to the river, so it's always fresh. His father said a-jie didn't need to be put into the water until her first birthday. Prior to that she was breastfed and doing well. Jiang Fengmian did not tell Yu Ziyuan of their clan's secret until they had a daughter together, and it certainly gave her no time to get used to the idea. Yu Ziyuan was pretty restrictive of how much time Jiang Yanli spent as a merfolk, but Jiang Cheng has no such qualms.

Literally on their daughter's first birthday Wen Qing walks in with some baked treats to see Jiang Cheng tossing their baby butt naked into the pond like a dead fish.

To say she nearly strangles him would be an understatement. "Look - look - Wen Qing - look -"

Her precious cherub is no longer a cherub - she is a hellion. No baby merfolk is able to control their appearance in open water (they're not affected by well water, or baths, or rain). Jiang Yanli's true form is actually terrifying, but as she grew she was able to control her upper body to look beautiful and more human when she was in water - how else would you entice stupid sailors? Once she fully emerges from the river/lake/ocean, she returns back to human form. But as a baby, merfolks essentially look 12 different shades of ghastly.

Jiang Cheng spends hours lying on his belly out on the deck splashing with his hands while their baby swims around, "Come to diedie, come to diedie- ow! she bit me!"

Wen Qing, "serves you right." Also: jfc I seriously need to start having some sons.

[ WWX: Or, you know, you can stop having sex with your husband. WQ: I'll stop if you stop. ]

She does not. Wen Qing has 5 daughters, much to Jiang Cheng's absolute delight.

Wen Qing, "We're not gonna have enough people to feed your offsprings!"

Jiang Cheng, standing over the now expanded pool, holding a plate of fresh liver that once belonged to a greedy merchant from Lanling, dangling one piece in his hand while his five daughters chomp at the surface like piranhas for their mid afternoon post-nap snack. "....hmm... I'll think of something."

Then Wen Qing thinks hell maybe it's better she doesn't have any boys, so this fuckery can end with her....

She gives birth to a bouncing baby boy the very next year.

Jiang Cheng decides that he's done enough good in the world and elects to go to Qishan and gets himself an ancient chinese version of a vasectomy.

Their daughters all grow into astonishing beauties, much to the misfortune of seamen and seawomen everywhere.

Fuck.

The genetics

1) mer gene: People have 23 pairs of chromosomes, which means for each gene we have (for the most part), you have two copies of that gene, called two alleles. In a given population, there could be many many alleles that encode for one thing, that's why people look different and have different appearances, personality and health status. The X and Y chromosome, called the sex chromosomes, are a little different than the other 22 pairs. The location where the mer gene is encoded is on the X chromosome. For most of the population, this is a null allele. As in, it doesn't encode anything, or it encodes something that is non-functional. Therefore, people are people and not mermaids. Only the Jiang mer gene, found on the X chromosomes of people with Jiang blood, form an active protein with subsequent physiological impact. You could call it a gain-of-function mutation for those us in the field ;). The mer gene is a X-link dominant gene, meaning it only requires one working allele on an X chromosome to be expressed.

Females are XX. This is why Jiang Yanli is a merfolk. She inherited 1 gain-of-function mer gene from her father Jiang Fengmian (who is a carrier), and one null mer gene from her mother Yu Ziyuan (who is human). Because the Jiang mer gene is dominant, JYL only needs one copy to be a full merfolk.

2) mer transposon gene: So now your question must be, hold on, hold on a second. If the active mer gene is found the Jiang X chromosome, then how can Jiang Cheng be a carrier? He inherited the Y chromosome from his dad, and normal X chromosome from his mom. If Jiang Cheng has more daughters, he would donate his X chromosome, which is normal (since it came from Yu Ziyuan). So how can his daughters be mermaids?

Well, the Y chromosome, which is a shrivelled up little chromosome, is a little peculiar in the Jiangs. It has a special transposon sequence. Transposons are....kind of like DNA viruses. It has a sequence of genes that encode a transposition gene and a structural gene. The transposition gene first gets transcribed by DNA transcription factors into a mRNA, which then gets translated into a protein. This protein then comes back from the cytoplasm into the nucleus to its DNA origin site to cut out the structural gene and then implants it into another location in the DNA. I know. It's wild. This actually happens in real life, I'm not making this shit up. The structural gene in this case is a gain-of-function mer gene.

For the mer transposon, it specifically translocates from the Y chromosome to the X chromosome in an in-frame fashion (as in it won't fuck up the reading of the rest of the DNA on the X chromosome). This way now Jiang Cheng's normal X chromosome which he inherited from his mother, has a working mer gene.

So... why isn't Jiang Cheng a merfolk? Well because -

3) anti-mer gene: The Jiang Y chromosome not only carries a mer transposon gene, it also carries an anti-mer gene, which suppresses the expression of the mer-gene, even though the poor transposon gene did all the work to transpose it lol. So even though Jiang boys has a X chromosome that carries a working mer gene, they do not express it themselves. Only when they have daughters, when they pass on that X chromosome, does that gene get turned on in the presence of no inhibition by anti-mer.

This is essentially how the SRY gene, which determines male sex, works in humans. Without the SRY gene on the Y chromosome, the default sex is female.

But this doesn't answer, why can't Jiang Yanli's daughters become merfolks? Well -

4) Epigenetics: paternal vs maternal imprinting. Now here's where things get really interesting. The mer gene is a Jiang Clan secret, if all their daughters who married out of the clan also made mer babies, then the cat would be out of the bag in no time. The reason why only Jiang sons can pass on the gene is that some genes are "maternal" and some genes are "paternal". DNA expression is not simply dictated by what's encoded in the DNA - the T G C A sequence - but also regulated by the proteins that are attached to it, aka the epigenetics. Even though most genes are in pairs (remember, 2 alleles?), some times you only want to express 1 copy of it. Some genes, we only express the copy that we inherit from our mother, and some genes we only express the copy we inherit from our father. When a gene is imprinted either through methylation or acetylation or both, that gene is silenced - aka those DNA transcription factors we talked about earlier can no longer get to it to make mRNAs.

For example: DIRAS3 is a paternally expressed and maternally imprinted gene located on chromosome 1 in humans. This means ALL of us express the DIRAS3 we inherited from our fathers. And if one day I have a child (I'm female), even if I pass on the DIRAS3 that I inherited from my father through chromosome 1, in my child that gene will become imprinted and silenced, because I am the female parent, and my copy of that gene in my offspring will always be silent.

That's how the mer gene works. It is a paternally expressed, maternally imprinted gene. The gene is active in Jiang Yanli because she got it from her dad. If she were to have children, they would have gotten that gene from their mum, and that gene would be "imprinted" aka silenced and they would a normal human.

[mrskurono]

Plot twist you do end up with a mini tobio bc your genes side bitch bye and didn't partake in the making of your child, now kags just takes him with him everywhere, to interviews, to practice and lets the little man hold a volleyball to feel close to the sport or some weird crap your husband was saying. reporters know not to approach kags b4 he has reached his mini me and has him in his arms. Ask him something b4 that and you aint getting a response

Have you seen those Kageyamas? Jfc they're both beautiful no ones genes have a chance that resting bitch face is strong in that family. You just look at this child you carried for ten months and wonder what the hell you even put into it.

Tobio "He's perfect."

"He looks exactly like you."

Awkward silence while Tobio turns around with his mini me in his arms with the same exact expression on both their faces (holy shit this kid looks like their dad. Hinata jokes he just had himself cloned bc he's a conceited ass and that's when Tobio punches the shit outta Hinata)

People thought he'd be a hands off dad (especially with what he does) but nothing could be further from the truth. He has his kid in his arms 24/7. Interviewers learned real fast that they can't even stand in front of him to get a question post game. He will walk right past them to go retrieve his child and only then will he turn around and look at someone who might be saying his name. And the volleyball thing? Yeah the first Halloween your sons a volleyball and for some stupid reason you let him convince you to be a "volleyball net" with him so you're both posts with a chunk of a baby dressed as a volleyball. Tobio cries everytime he sees that picture too but denies it

And for whatever reason he's the devils advocate and convinces you to have another bc how could he just have one 😬

[soyforramen]

“The Pincushion Man” Last ep was so football heavy I forgot to pay attention to the next episode. Whoops:

Ten minutes in and the only thing to say is Jabitha is cute y’all, even if they end up only being friends

Glen is blaming…. Hal? Who is … dead?? Glen is TBK

Ok but I’m p sure most of us have used the maple trees going dry as a plot point to some Blossom creepiness in fanfic before. What we didn’t have was Hiram in a mining hat with a pickaxe jfc this show

Maple mushrooms. That’s it. That’s the series.

Chad flew a helicopter crash while drunk, and Veronica thinks it’s because she wished him dead? What?

Idk some Varchie nonsense followed by creepy twin nonsense, I missed it because I had to chase down my mother’s puppy

Glen writes about the Cooper family serial killer ‘gene’. This is an academically approved paper. Isn’t sleeping with one of them a conflict of interest?

Glen, once more, is an ASS.

Idk something about shady military things

Chad tries too hard.

Reggie burns up the maple farm while a prison break occurs in the background

At this point I tried to explain to my mother what was happening, and her response was, “I don’t think I want to know anymore.”

Me too, mom. Me too

My dead(?) gay sons came to see their family and get married by Alice. Because Charles asked her to

Juniper obviously didn’t learn basic safety

Glen shows up and finally realizes he fucked up good

Charles decides to do a remake of Funny Games with Glen

Skipping through the Purge: Riverdale because no

Tabitha Gerald’s Game’s Jughead into writing. Except he’s haunted by the ghosts of ex’s past who turns into Mothman

Take that Stephen King

And there’s the Blossom (oc)cult I’ve always wanted

Chad is an ass. Also a terrible businessperson

Something something military bad. Archie Andrews goes to Washington, etc etc.

There’s a printer in the bunker and Jughead banged out a whole four episodes? Maybe?

Alice reads The Bad Seed. This is a reference to earlier. In case we didn’t notice Betty saying it before

Betty continues to terrify blue collar workers and sex workers. Because … ?

And it turns out Jughead has had a bad trip. In several different ways.

[thurisazsalail]

I’m tired of ‘leftist’ anti-intellectualism and America-centric xenophobia posing as liberalism.

Protip: If you are anti-academia on subjects of culture not being taught by someone genetically from that culture, even if they know nothing about the culture they are talking about and have never participated in it and were never raised with it... over someone who actually does have a background in knowledge from people of that culture who lived in it and were raised in it... you might actually be the imperialist you are talking about fighting against. You might actually be silencing the people you think you are elevating through deplatforming actual sources from the cultural background talked about, artificially holding up someone with the right genes but no heritage or ties. You might want appearance over substance to be a “good person.” Rethink your views on academia. Think critically. What sources is a person using? Does a person talk about Africa like it's a country and not a continent (ew), or does the person have a list of resources about specific cultures as spoken about by the people from those cultures? Do they make effort in finding anyone from that culture to present or speak in class, if possible? Do they show videos of those people, which are not denigrating to them? Did the person work hard to find resources for you in a language you understand, or did they work to translate for you? Or are their resources some old white dude from 200 years ago, like using the Budge translations for (ancient) Egyptian? Did they quote Fiona Graham or Liza Dalby on geisha? Because of those people is a damn liar who took a fucktonne of money and prestige from an ailing geisha house and ran, and one actually trained as an anthropologist who spent time in Pontocho, where they knew exactly what she was there for and they suggested she debuted as a geisha to better understand them. Does the person gloss over issues like war or genocide? Or do they say, "Yeah, we should probably talk about that. In fact, you can use some example from recent history to understand the attitudes a bit better. Here they are, and here are some differences. Here are some further reading (and if available, video) sources, including from the groups that got really fucked over." If you SAY you are into historybounding (taking historical elements in your wardrobe and making it ‘new’ fashion) and you want to make the frilly French dresses and the London fog coats, but don't ever want to talk about how people eventually used the Versailles floors as a latrine because of the decadence and wanton wealth they collapsed into... and how the common people suffered because of it... Or how England discriminated against it's own people heavily, relegating Jewish English people to certain neighbourhoods or refused jobs to them, or treated the Moorish-descent like shit, or actively would beat the Irish in public and stole their land... you might not be into history or culture. You might just like looking at the pretty things and copying them. You know. Probably culturally appropriating (if not borderline doing so). Not just "history bounding." People in a marginalised group often have to learn things about our own groups’ history, or else we might see "Stonewall" and believe that a white guy threw the first brick, or that "queer" is a slur. Our own people, gasp, might have to learn from... academia. And strangely, I know, it's so weird, but some of the people who teach... use primary sources (that’s sources from the time/place/people the source talks about, like Gay Manifesto written by gay man Carl Wittman)... or are closeted about being experts on the subjects... because they are talking about their own groups and STILL face discrimination and might lose those precious jobs if they are out... and they're just not identifiable by your *outsider* standards. And sorry, but if you don't know your own history, yes, you are an outsider in that sense. Yeah, I can trace some of my family lineage to Turtle Tribe Seneca. But I am an outsider because the only reservation I've ever been on is the one to Olive Garden. I might have to *gasp* turn to actual knowledgeable people to learn something about that. I can't just dress up in whatever or do whatever and say, "No, it's okay! My great-grandmother is Seneca!" and then claim not knowing better because my heritage was stolen by federal American laws. That's not how that works. There is some tentative evidence that some of my family was Jewish before hiding it and coming to America in the late 1930s. But I still have to go through an official conversion process. I still have to learn Jewish history and Jewish culture, and about Jewish diaspora issues. That’s how it works. If you are Japanese in Japan, same thing applies to certain things. Like if you are performing tea ceremony with your school, you can’t just wander in to most of them with whatever pretty kimono you want. There are rules for that. It is a language, not just a dress. You will be sent home. If you don’t want to adhere to those rules, you will not be accepted. That’s how it works. It sucks, totally. But welcome to real life. You might have to actually work at things... Including managing your feelings and not making other people responsible for them. You might have to take responsibility AND bury your ego long enough to learn from educated people. One tip is... Question sources! That was my biggest gripe ten years ago! Plenty of books about Japanese culture, and all of them with lots of white people (white according to American-centric ideas about whiteness) writing the narrative! I had to work to find books about Japanese social ideas written by Japanese authors. You might have to work, too, and not blame other people for not just *handing you shit.* But in the end, accept that other people might know more than you and that is isn't about being Uppity by nature. It's also about "I have all this, you want some?"

If you don't want to learn, then you have to leave the classroom. You can't be a child, throwing a temper tantrum. You're a grown-up. But don't just assume by someone's face that you magically already know how things will be. Ask for a list, a syllabus, a source, a curriculum vitae. That should give you some insight on what to expect. Ask for clarification. Oh, this class is teaching Arthur Conan Doyle? WHAT are they teaching about him, specifically? Erasure isn’t the answer, here. That legacy still exists.

Stick to a scope: you can't fit six books of info in one hour. You need to stay focused. That's part of learning. No "whaddabouts?" Yes, write them down and message them in! But they might not be for this specific post, lecture, or class. The class might need a thing right then, like when my Humanities prof decided that Britain just "had a skirmish" with Benin. No, they committed genocide because Benin refused to become a colony of England, and you need to know that RIGHT NOW while the class is happening, before the moment is gone or internalized. But if you have a side comment about what happened to diaspora in WW2 once they moved to Hawaii and Brazil, the focus of the class might be on experiences *in Japan* and not on diaspora. Email it. It might become another class. There isn't time for that right now. That doesn't mean the prof hates diaspora Japanese. It doesn't mean diaspora don't matter. It just means that the class is limited in focus and time, and right now, the focus isn't on diaspora. Don't make a big dramatic deal about it. Instead, idk, maybe write a well-sourced paper on diaspora experiences while fleeing hostile Showa-era takeover and release it publicly. You can just... do that. I've done that with transcripts for movies that don't have them, for essays on various topics. You can even get paid for that content! No one had to "approve" me. I put it on fucking Tumblr so everyone could have it. Open-source means something. jfc people. Stop whining. Start having open conversations instead of shutting anything new or different down. Stop the anti-intellectualism disguised as liberalism. Stop the xenophobia and nativism disguised as cultural protection. It's great when a culture decides for itself that most people (from that culture) don't want foreign interaction or interference! Leave them the fuck alone! It isn’t hard! Some cultures are closed. Some are semi-closed, like there’s certain things you can learn about or participate in but others are only for people from that background. But don't get mad when a totally different culture doesn't care or uses it for leverage. You don’t get to dismiss a different culture or denigrate them under the guise of “protecting” other POC by erasing them. And if your excuse is (Culture/group) is imperialistic/all people of ____ descent/race are _____ DUDE FIRST OF ALL WTF and second of all, let me tell you something about American history. French history. English history. There are some nuanced conversations we COULD have here, like adults. Or you could just be honest and say, “This isn’t a conversation I’d like to have right now.” That’s totally fine. Sometimes you just don’t have the spoons or time. I often don’t, being disabled. Or you could shut down like a child and say that this is fine but then mute all posts until you get your way, and anyone who posts an actual source is wrong or bad because intellectuals and experts are suspicious. Your choice. Real life is complicated. Figure it out instead of trying to reduce hard things to a box to fit in easily. Expand your world past your little tiny experiences in your own country and background. Stop assuming every fucking thing in the world works like it does in America. Stop approving/disapproving of any information that doesn’t match up with your American morality or experiences- there are *other people* that deal with things other ways than we do. Stop wholesale condemning anyone better informed than you just because of your ego. Start using some of those critical thinking skills you are supposed to have. If you don’t know how, type “critical thinking development” into youtube for tutorials. -------- Edit: hahaha I KNEW that Tumblr deleted something when it highlighted it. I just couldn’t figure out what at the time. The difference between Graham and Dalby: one worked in Pontocho as a geisha for research, and they knew that ahead of time; Graham lied her ass off to geisha and then tried to open her own house after taking only a few lessons to get famous and make a lot of money. She’s a fucking embarrassment and worse. --------------- Update 11/3 Turns out that dig I made about French costuming (a perennial fave in historybounding and historical sewing groups) and imperialism wasn’t all that far off... here’s a whole ass thread about how many fucking African presidents and leaders France has specifically killed, and how much France has done to just Africa relatively recently. That’s JUST to Africa. I bet some of my Mi’kMaq and Algonquin-descent friends would have some things to say about heritage erasure regarding the French.  https://thurisazsalail.tumblr.com/post/633807847387512832

[swynlake-spill]

Screw Robinson’s ranking. What’s your ranking of the secondary students?

Oooooo yes, I think it’s about time we get a more objective point of view around here don’t we? Now, my sources tell me that the Ashleys’ ranking system was based on a combination of style, looks, and...personality or cool points or something like that. I’m assuming that Wilbur is using about the same system and so I will honor it, but I’ll add it all up to a score out of 30 in the end! 

also this took so long will someone please venmo me a quid for coffee or something 

Bae “Nemo” Nam-min

Looks: 8/10 he’s legit hottie when he actually puts effort in 

Style: 4/10 leaves MUCH to be desired. He has two looks-- sweatpants or skinny jeans. With a friend like Finn, you’d think he’d be more educated

Personality: 7/10 He’s very easy to be friends with, but an airhead and drama magnet. Don’t be fooled by the smile-- he’s more trouble than he looks!

Overall score: 19/30, or about a 6.33 on the old scale. 

Ferbs Fletcher

Looks: 9/10 LEGS LEGS LEGS LEGS LEGS. points off for hair rip 

Style: 4/10 why are all men fashion-challenged, why are all boys addicted to the skinny 

Personality: 5/10 I honestly don’t know what to make out of Ferb b/c he’s more of a tall, mysterious type, so I’m giving him a very neutral score here. If he opened his mouth more, I might like him less. 

Overall score: 18/30! 6 even! 

Mei Kusakabe 

Looks: 8/10 EEEE she’s a real cutie with serious selfie game! 

Style: 9/10 As you all know, I’m super obsessed with her look! Point deducted for those misses, which are SERIOUS misses. Miss Mei needs to float some of those looks past a panel before strutting into school and embarrassing herself. 

Personality: 6/10 Here’s where she’s losing points and it’s because she talks to ghosts. Mei! Ignore them, jfc! Save it for your free time! 

Overall score: 23/30-- a 7.6! 

Jack-Jack Parr

Looks: 5/10 oh boy does JJ Parr need an intervention. I just don’t understand why so many boys’ mothers don’t teach them how to properly care for their hair. Honey, you need to be using a special shampoo and a mousse for those curls!! ldsajflk let me help you 

Style: 2/10 ooooh boy does JJ Par need an invention. Everything he wears looks like hand-me-downs from Dash. It was cool when Dash wore it... several years ago! 

Personality: 6/10 I think he’s funny! He’s nice! He’s um, creative! Like if I went to secondary and got paired with him on a group project, I would absolutely be doing most of the work but at least he’d probably try. Maybe? Well. I could think of people who I would want to work with less.  

Overall score: 14/30 --4.6! 

Su Qin

Looks: 7/10. My problem here has everything to do with the weird staring thing. We all know the weird staring thing. None of us like the weird staring thing. 

Style: 7/10. I like her style as I’ve said before! I think she’s super unique, but I also think she could go just that extra step further. 

Personality: 2/10. Oh honey. I hate having to score you so low, but right now your personality is if Mei’s personality was a sandwich, you’d be the crusts that no one wants to eat. 

Overall score: 16/30-- 5.3 

Brandon “Barrel” Adamson

Looks: 5/10. PLEASE CUT UR HAIR CUT UR HAIR CUT UR HAIR. There’s a cute boy under there somewhere! 

Style: 2/10 Barrel knows one colour and that colour is black. His clothes also don’t seem to fit him very well. Hey Wilbur, can you do something about this?

Personality: 2/10. It’s only fair to give him a similar score as Su, since they like each other so much. He is also the leftover crusts to Lock’s personality sandwich. 

Overall score: 9/30-- a 3. Ouch. 

Romeo “Roo” DeRosa

Looks: 8/10. He is extremely good-looking! Like that’s a smile that is doing him every favour in the world. I can certainly see why he lured an Ashley in. 

Style: 6/10. ugh all these teenage boys exhaust me with their lack of style why even bother having this as a category. what kills me is Roo’s shoes are never clean, like they’re caked with mud. Wash off your shoes!! 

Personality: 8/10. I have almost no complaints with Romeo. He’s a sweet boy, he’s hardworking, he’s funny and even talented! I also think he’s kind of gullible...might even go with stupid. You’d have to be to knock up Ashley A. 

Overall score: 22/30-- 7.3! 

Finn Flounder

Looks: 9/10 hELLO face personally i dont understand why we have not talked about Finn’s face sooner and also more, like we just have dedicated Finn Face Appreciation Time, like, I’m talking artistically speaking is anyone else with me or

Style: 10/10 Colour! Variety! Texture! Pattern! Finn knows how to pick a concept and nail it, and he makes so much of his own clothes! 

Personality: 1/10 oh right this is why we don’t talk about his face, it’s because his personality is the equivalent of the puddle of water you squeeze out of a dishrag. He is such a sweet boy with no spine whatsoever. It drive me CRaZY.

Overall score: 20/30-- 6.6 

Phineas Flynn

Looks: 7/10. He is cute! He has a perfectly pleasant face with nice features. He is tall, though not as tall as Ferb. He looks, in a word, harmless. 

Style: 5/10. Once again, he looks like his mother dresses him, and I mean sometimes that’s a blessing because who knows what he’d look like if his mother didn’t dress him, but way to look like 95% of the teenage male population. 

Personality: 6/10. Phineas is charming, but only if you talk to him for about 20 minutes. After twenty minutes, there’s this quality in his voice that will worm inside your head and get stuck there. It’s like nails on the chalkboard. Once you hit forty minutes, you’ll realize he’s still talking (though you haven’t said anything in over twenty minutes), and that he really loves to hear himself talk so then it just becomes an exercise in watching Phineas impress himself. 

Overall score: 18/30--6, like his brother. Appropriate! 

Haley Long

Looks: 8/10. She’s hella cute! She’s got to be, sharing the genes of one hottie Jake Long! 

Style: 8/10. She’s got the whole ‘am i gay’ vibe going for her, which I love. I love when I can’t tell, when it’s like, does she like flannel, or is an avid fan of Lost Girl? She went with Ashley A to prom, so I mean we know she’s at least a LITTLE wlw--I’m getting off track, the point is, I’m into her masculine-feminine energies. 

Personality: 5/10. Hayley confuses me. Like, on one hand--she went to prom with Ashley A so maybe she’s an insane person. On the other hand, she ended up with Vee at the end of prom, so maybe...oh yeah, she’s still an insane person. She feels unpredictable, and maybe in a good way, but also maybe I need to run for my life. Haven’t decided! 

Overall score: 21/30-- 7! 

Dewford “Dewey” Mallard

Looks: 5/10. The Mallard boys are very interesting looking to me, like they have some of the most beautiful hair in Secondary but they prove time and time again they have absolutely no idea what to do with it. They’re also tall, but so skinny, like slendermen. Would like to enroll them all in a zumba class, maybe even yoga. 

Style: 5/10. I’ll be honest, my eyes glaze over when I look at Dewey/Huey b/c the only difference between them is the general colour scheme. I like that they do TRY for some individuality. 

Personality: 4/10. Dewey is...quiet. And weird. And alone a lot. He actually concerns me a little bit, like is he okay...? It’s not really my job to know, but it should be someone’s! 

Overall score: 14/30-- 4.6 

Hubert “Huey” Mallard

Looks: 5/10 please see above 

Style: 5/10 please see above

Personality: 8/10. I like to think of Huey as the capable, family-friendly Mallard. He’s like a glass of milk with a chocolate biscuit. Everyone likes it, even if it’s not everyone’s favourite dessert. I mean, he’s smart, interesting, he has a wide group of friends! If I had to choose anyone to be put on a group project with, it would be Huey Mallard 

Overall score: 18/30-- 6!  

Llewellyn “Louie” Mallard

Looks: 5/10. u know what to do 

Style: 7/10. GASP. Yes! A decent score! I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: Louie tries to have a unique style. He experiments, he’s not scared of looking like an idiot--he often looks like an idiot-- but he at least intrigues me. And next to so many boys who literally don’t know what they’re doing, he really stands out from the pack. 

Personality: 6/10. While Huey is family-friendly, Louie is an acquired taste. You might really like all those wacky Louie antics, or maybe you’re allergic! He’s definitely trouble all the way around, so my personal opinion is that he’s best in small doses.

Overall score: 18/30-- 6! 

Moon Yeongtae

Looks: 7/10. He pisses me off actually because he’s genuinely quite a handsome boy who is genuinely trying to look as un-handsome as possible. I should put this way lower out of sheer spite, but I want to encourage the rest of the teen population to exercise because at least Tae has that going for himself. Take the Mallards to the gym, Tae!

Style: 3/10. He also only knows the colour black and I think I’ve seen him in jeans three times in my life. I’ve never seen a boy so dedicated to sweatpants as a personality trait

Personality: 5/10. Speaking of personality, sweatpants isnt a personality trait! What’s his other personality trait? Arguing with people? Grunting? 

Overall score: 15/30-- 5. 

Pearl Park 

Looks: 10/10. YES our first perfect score! But is there any question when you have a face like that? Just check out her insta. The likes speak for themselves. She’s GLOWING, she’s RADIANT, she’s going to bring this school to its knees

Style: 8/10. Obviously she has more style than 80 percent of this list. It’s only this low because we haven’t seen her full potential yet, or so I like to think. She’s playing it very safe, even if she’s playing it in her own league. I would like to see her push the envelope!

Personality: 7/10. Once again, this is low because we are still getting to know the alluring Miss Park. She seems to be super nice! No enemies yet. But I know there’s something spicy hiding under all the new girl niceties. I would also like to see it! 

Overall score: 25/30-- 8.3

Pip Seville

Looks: 7/10. Personally, I like he’s adorable! He might not be topping any Most Handsome Buzzfeed lists anytime soon nor is he anyone’s secret crush but we love a boy who had good hygiene and perfect skin! 

Style: 9/10. Yes yes yes!!! He might be a theatre kid cliche, but I’ll take one of those over another awful pair of joggers! Pip would never wear all black unless he’s in tech rehearsal, and we respect that. 

Personality: 6/10. Soooo he’s pretty loud and a bit of a risk, like if you partnered with him on a school project, the odds of you getting an A are very high, but the odds of you crying by the end of it because you didn’t meet his expectations are also very high. So you know....take your chances. 

Overall score: 23/30-- 7.6! 

Wilbur Robinson

Looks: 8/10. Well OBVIOUSly Wilbur is a hottie. Did I deduct points for his new hair. Maybe I did. 

Style: 9/10. FINALLYYYY Yet another boy who can dress and dress well! It helps that he can afford nice things of course, but you also have to know how to WEAR the nice things, and Wilbur does. 

Personality: 7/10. Wilbur is funny, opinionated, stubborn, a go-getter, generous, and these days, even charitable (those are two different things). Does Wilbur have flaws? Sure. But from what I’ve seen in my ask box, people can’t decide what those flaws are. Is he ... too nice? No wait, he’s actually too mean! He’s an asshole, oh wait, he’s a simp for Barrel. Bla bla bla. Point is, if you add everything up, he’s a decent dude. I don’t agree with all his choices, but I’d also rather hang out with Wilbur than most people on this list! 

Overall score: 24/30-- an 8! 

Ariel Triton

Looks: 4/10. Boy did the Tritons really mess it up on this one!! I love the pixie cut, but Ariel always lets it grow too long and doesn’t keep up with it. It’s like at this point just shave your head-- tbh, i bet you’d look pretty good. 

Style: 4/10. BOY of all the girls she really has no idea what she’s doing either. I admire Alana and Adella deeply for letting Ariel find herself in her own time. I’m just hoping it’s going to work out at this point, maybe we’ll transition from Dumpster Girl to punk rock when they actually get the band going. 

Personality: 6/10. You know, I have a healthy level of respect for Ariel. Some people will say she is too fightey, but she stands up for her friends and her beliefs! I’m into that. I mean, she’s usually wrong, but at least she has conviction. 

Overall score: 14/30-- 4.6 

[clatterbane]

Thinking again after seeing some discussion around ending up looking too much like an abusive parent for your own comfort, and how do you even deal with that when you just keep getting honestly triggered looking in the mirror? 😑

One thing that impressed me when I found Biodad's FB a while back? For all the huge deal my mother kept making about how much alike we looked, as adults I do not even look much like him.

That's not only because he was a 70+ year old man with that nose (which had indeed grown over the years!), and I am not.

Yeah, I got my coloring from him--which my mom seemed to fixate on a lot--and we looked like we might be related. More like cousins or something, ignoring the age difference. But, that was about the extent of it. The sinking-in face I got to hear too much about, and all. 🙄

In reality, I turned out looking more like my aunt in the face (who my mom never liked), or several other people from that side of the family that I can think of offhand. Hell, even the late Blaze Starr! Somebody way back must have had some pretty strong genes there.

But yeah, that was apparently enough to remind her too much of the ex and set her off sometimes.

What's also darkly funny there is that she really did not like it whenever somebody commented how much alike the two of us looked. Which happened a decent bit after I was out of my teens. (No idea why not so much earlier, though.)

I'm honestly still not always happy about that (ETA: nothing personal there!), but I did get my build straight from her and half her family. I was a couple of inches shorter until she shrank some from back problems, but yeah. She also kept picking out differences like the tendency toward chicken legs I got from the same aunt already mentioned, but we really did have the same basic build. Guessing that's what other people were noticing.

Anyway, I am just as glad not to have to hear about any of it anymore, because jfc the constant comparisons to people she really disliked got old fast. Glad not to be dealing with appearance nitpicking on the regular, in general.

But, it kinda impressed me anyway, seeing just how much I don't even resemble the person I was always supposed to.