#this fucking GUY

[la-vie-est-une-fleur29]

[madlori]

sometimes I am just overwhelmed with resentment that so much of my adult life (going on TEN YEARS now) has been dominated by donald fucking trump.

it's just such disappointing writing that the great villain of our lives is...this fucking guy.

like more even than hating him or being anxious about him it's just...really? him? why were all of my 40s and counting just...so much of him? it's so fucking stupid.

sometimes the thing keeping me going is the knowledge that one day I will get a notification, a text, or wake up to the news that he is dead, and how that will feel.

[just-consume-it]

Aegon watching his toddler children fighting in the rings: 😄

Aegon after listening to a poor farmer that lost his sheep: 😢

[winkleclit]

look at this guy. i dont like him

he spent 4 hours doodling his fucking boyfriend btw just thought you should know

[meowcatticus]

Certified meowcatticus work in progress of this freakass critter (UPDATE ITS FINISHED GO CHECK IT OUT,,, if you like want to idk:])

[kissme-withyour-cherrylipstick]

Kilgharrah doesn't wear pants because they'd be on fire

@eowynlyra you inspired this

[pippuns]

hi. im back with more shen jiu-isms.

[munsonsvest]

this fucking dude loves pointing to shit

"toddlers when seeing someone with a visible disability in public"

[thatbadadvice]

I (15f) am slightly worried that I led on some guys I did not mean to lead on.

There are two guys that I've hung out with over longer spans of time or regularly.

1. Hung out with him for several hours non-stop cause he was fun to hang out with, and we took a walk in the forest aswell, he got (slightly) touchy but not that much.

2. Works in a shop in my small city and I go there almost weekly just to hang out but always buy something, he sometimes offers me drinks for free (twice by now) or reduces the price.

They both got my insta too

However, the problem is that a) I'm not looking for a relationship and, more importantly, b) they are both in their 20s.

I took care to mention that I am only 15 to both of them but idk if that changed anything. Any advice? I also don't want to confront them directly cause I might have just interpreted it like this.

Hello, anonymous!

Thank you for writing in. I am delighted to inform you that you have excellent judgment for wondering what the hell is going on here, and for questioning these guys' behavior toward you.

Grown-ass men — and that is what dudes in their 20s are — bear the burden of not being weird to, for, or about young women of your age. It is the grown-ass men of the world who are obligated not to make you, or young women like you, feel weird about literally anything. In fact, grown-ass men should go out of their way, on purpose and with gusto, NEVER to get even within ten million football fields' worth of "(slightly) touchy" with a gal of your age. So that's my read on Mr. Walk In The Woods. I have less to say definitively about Mr. Free/Cheap Drinks, but I trust your judgment: if you feel like Mr. Free/Cheap Drinks is sending some ~ signals ~, you're right about it.

It sounds like both of these Grown-Ass Men are trying to make pretty creepo moves, so let me be clear: nothing you could ever do could even possibly in the most remote sense amount to "leading them on," because you are not responsible for the behavior of Grown-Ass Men.

I think you know this, or you wouldn't be asking the Bad Advisor this question. You know they're being weird. You know you haven't done anything beyond exist in these dudes' general sphere, which you are entitled to do! You are allowed to exist in the world without having to swat off the advances of older guys! It really sucks that girls and women can just be living our regular-ass lives and have dudes be at us like this. But you're not responsible for their decisions — whether it's a decision to offer you free/cheap drinks (with strings attached, implied) or to get (slightly) handsy during a walk in the woods.

The fact that you told both of these Grown-Ass Men explicitly that you are 15 years old should have sent both of them spinning back into the sun with shame and embarrassment, not that they probably needed it spelled out, but GOOD ON YOU for making it so clear. That is actually terribly brave of you, and they should have fallen all over themselves to not fall all over you subsequently. They should be mortified about their behavior.

You did not misinterpret their actions; and if you did, who cares? Some dudes who weren't hitting on a 15-year-old will continue to not hit on a 15-year-old? Girl, your self-preservation instinct is INTACT and WORKING. It's on them not to be creepos. Any Grown-Ass Man who is on the level and not a weirdo would 1000000000000% never need to be told "Hey dude, I'm 15" in the first place. You have good judgment. You are reading these men correctly.

So what do you do about your good judgment? Well, first — no more walks in the woods. Suddenly you have an urgent appointment that precludes all walks in woods! The benefit-of-the-doubt ship has sailed. Dude got handsy and you dislike it. Dunzo. You are unavailable for future walks in woods (or anywhere). You've got a test to study for, a practice to go to, some buddies to hang out with elsewhere. So sorry, no-can. Dude can find a 20-to-90-something-year-old woman to paw up under the canopy if that's his jam. There are scores of women his age and older who'd be glad (i guess?) to get felt up while some dude shoves them ~ romantically ~ against the bark of a moldy Hackberry.

As for Mr. Free/Cheap Drinks — look, I appreciate the appeal of a discount beverage — but I think you gotta be prepared to aggressively (politely) pay for your drinks. Dude says "This one is on the house" and you DGAF, because you've got $5 cash and you're laying it on the counter with a smile and saying "I really appreciate it, but I'd like to pay for my drink — you get it!"

It's the "you get it!" that's really the key here. It's polite, but clear. It demands that these Grown-Ass Dudes do the work of not getting it and saying so if they're gonna be that dippy about it. You can use it on Mr. Handsy In The Woods, too. You can't do X, Y, Z because Reasons -- "Gotta get back to piano practice, it would be weird if I stayed here, since we're just friends! You get it!"

You shouldn't have to do the work of offering these dippos the "you get it" out, but it's a safe and reliable way of making it clear that they better the fuck get it. Like, they better the fuck understand that you are 15 and they are being weird about this whole deal.

Practice:

"Oh, I'd like to chill but doing another big long hang alone together would make it seem like we're going out or something, and that would be weird -- you get it."

"I appreciate the discount, but if I keep taking these drinks, it'll seem like you LIKE me or something. That's weird, right? You get it!"

If either of these Grown-Ass Men gets sketchy about these very polite brush-offs, that shit is on them and will only confirm what you know: you have great judgment. These dudes are weird. If they're going to be weird, you can be so polite that they have to explain why, specifically, they are being weird and don't understand what you are politely saying, which is that their interest in you is weird.

You have not led these Grown-Ass Men on by existing in their universe. You have not led them on by being polite to them and tolerating their inappropriate advances to preserve your own safety. The concept of "leading on" is bullshit, fucked up, heteronormative dipshittery that puts the burden on women, mostly, to account for the crappy behavior of men who can, do, and should know better. I assure you these men know better, and they think you don't. That's why older guys pursue younger and teen women in the first place — they think they get to be the big men in charge, because they're afraid they can't manipulate women their own age.

Here's what, though: they can't manipulate you, either. You are clever, self-possessed and a great self-advocate. They're being weird. You're being smart. Make sure they know it.

[codacheetah]

my friend sniffrin

[havatoast]

im going to reread the entire one piece manga.

starting chapter 1...!!!!!!!! i love these losers

[lacilou]

This is getting out of hand, y'all.

📸: 3sa Photography

[blmpff]

ANDY BIAN 06.10.23

[genderkoolaid]

You’re not even trans (as per your header, you’re a female who identifies as a woman) and yet you claim to be part of it so you can force yourself and your “progressive homophobia” on others… look at yourself. You’re not an ally to trans people

babe. you have got to get a hobby that is not sending rambling anon hate to random blogs on tumblr dot com

and while it shouldnt matter. for the record: i do, in fact, Have Dysphoria! i have talked a decent amount on this very blog about my bottom dysphoria and my intense desire for phalloplasty. the reason i am so comfortable calling myself a woman is because i went on testosterone, enjoyed it, and felt comfortable being a woman in a clearly sex-variant body. Even then, I still often want to be read as a queer man (part of why I keep my breasts)!

I am about as much a True™ Transexual™ as you could ask of a nonbinary person. Literally no cis person I interact with IRL reads me as cis. You are grasping at straws to justify your obsession with me.

[frnkiebby]

who picked up his rock~🎃

[almayver]

Gods that line about never having anyone to go play in the claw machine turns way sadder because he really never got that. He just gave that to himself in his dying brain. Someone to go with him and to teach him and then offer to go whenever he wants

And how childish it is too that Tyme knows how to win and they get like 20 plushies. It's such a kid fantasy