#this is 30

[thealienstud]

Thanks for the bday wishes yall 🙏🏾🥹🫶🏾

[sensualnoiree]

SENSUALNOIREE

[fangbangerghoul]

I came out the other side of my 20s with a degree in psych, working on my bachelor's in polysci, had a kid, worked on my mental health and found I could vibe with sobriety.

I'm surrounded by the best community and am loved by amazing people. I couldn't be happier as I reach 30.

(👀 But I mean if someone sent me something on ca$hap: $NotYourRamona I wouldn't complain)

Thanks to all my moots who are always patient with me and have stuck around and thanks to all my discord moots who also became some of my closest friends.

I hope the next year is filled with creativity, success, fostering more community, and continuing a path where a difference is made.

[comfort-zone-magic-zone]

Today I decided to do something new. After my chapter meeting, instead of going home, I decided to take myself to lunch. In fact, I am sitting in this little bistro right now, typing this out. I haven’t taken myself out to lunch, by myself, in a very long time. This is so freeing.

It’s funny. This morning I didn’t even want to get out of bed. I did not workout because how exhausted I have been since my birthday. I almost didn’t go to my chapter meeting but promised myself I would. So to mentally prepare myself for a day of doing things I really didn’t want to do, I stayed in bed a lot longer than normal. I had a banana, a hot lemon tea, and watched trashy teen movie. I allowed myself to be late. Getting dressed slowly, preparing an iced coffee, and taking my time to get out the house.

Though I was 15 minutes late to my meeting, it hadn’t even started. I felt like that just showed me that being on time all the time is not always necessary. It felt amazing to just ease into the room, grab a yogurt parfait, and be. The meeting went well despite some ladies showing their mental age. Getting older is no joke. Women who I know have great critical thinking skills just weren’t grasping basic concepts. Through the struggle, we moved forward. It was a quick meeting, an hour and a half passing by in the blink of an eye.

Feeling the hunger of having very little to eat and being on a side of town that I don’t frequent, I looked up a lunch spot and find myself at cute little bistro having Tomago Avocado Toast and a hibiscus iced tea, enjoying this time to myself. Instead of taking up a table, I’m at the bar, a first for me. Only black woman, not a first for me.

Do I have a laundry list of things to do and worries on my mind? Yes, but this is what I need. I don’t need to rush home or go to the store or meal prep or plan my life out. I just need to sit here with my head phones and blog about the simple but impactful adventure I am on. I am definitely going to have to tell my therapist about this experience on Thursday.

This is being 30.

[citylightconfessions]

idk who needs to hear this but I was praying/studying and long story short

"Do not be afraid for the Lord your God goes with you wherever you go" Joshua 1:9 and we are "Fearfully and wonderfully made" Psalm 139:14

And also, we are instructed to "Fear the Lord and depart from Evil" Proverbs 3:7

And the word used in both these scriptures is "Yare" (Pronounced Yaw-ray without the lil' lines and dashes because idk how to activate tht keyboard) which also means to "Honour, respect, and to be in awe of"

And so I have concluded that I simply get to give back the same wonder and reverence God poured out into creating me- back to Him.

nd that made tht scripture a lil less daunting

hope this helps someone

[whats-her-quirk]

Happy birthday to me I have literally been up all night with the worst heartburn I’ve maybe ever had

[thealienstud]

Zillow is my comfort app.....😗😂 love being nosy and looking at other peoples tastes in their houses.

[amyelizabethlove]

i got a notification that my blog turned twelve years old. twelve years since college. twelve years since i surrendered my life to Jesus. twelve years ago i was falling in love with my husband. twelve years ago i had no sense of style, i was not disciplined, and i did not have the best relationship with my parents. but now? it is twelve years later and i have never felt more confident, i am a thriving mother of three, my marriage is incredible and we love each other more and more every day, i eat nourishing meals made from plants, and i have learned to communicate really well with my mother and father and they are really proud of me. wow. things get better. growing up is not scary. it's actually incredible to see how far you come, what you learn, how you mature. and the things you thought were important--the silly, dumb stuff you used to get anxious about--none of that matters anymore. you're free. and all of this was made possible because of kind, gracious God. praise Him.

[anxiousgirl]

Its 3 am and I can't sleep cuz my shoulder is fucked up 😕

[bellaso-bomb]

This is 30 Happy Aries Day #♈️🐏

[comfort-zone-magic-zone]

Imagining My Ideal Self

So, for the past 3 nights, I have been unable to stay asleep. I go to bed at a decent hour and then wake up between 2:30AM and 3:30AM. I do end up back asleep eventually but today is taking longer so I thought I would do some reflection.

As I stated in a previous post, I have turned 30 and am trying to live more for myself and set better boundaries. I started the former in a small way yesterday by taking myself out for lunch. The latter I am working on with my therapist.

Today, I want to do some imaging. I reblogged this post the other day and I want to go through the questions for myself. See what I can answer and what I can’t. Anything I can’t answer is where I need to focus on as I plan 2025.

What does your ideal self look like? This one I have worked a lot on over the years and I am slowly becoming her. Since losing 100 pounds, how I dress and carry myself has shifted. My ideal self looks effortless and put together no matter what she has on. Outfits come together seamlessly; matching sets, clean shoes, microlocs neat, carefully placed accessories, and light makeup. Due to budget constraints, I have slowly eased into this. My gym clothes typically match as often as I can. I try not to wear sweats too often outside the house, and if I do, I elevate it with clean sneakers and accessories. I am keeping the weight off and it will stay that way. I do have a goal for skin removal surgery for an even more trimmed look.

What does your ideal self smell like? Well clean obviously. I haven’t found my signature scent yet. The bottle perfumes I have don’t last as long as I like and these oils my mother gave me (the New York style roll-ons that you can’t ever find again) are a bit too strong at times. I would like a floral/fruity scent I think. Something that reminds me of femininity, easy life, and sunshine. Goal 1: Find a signature scent.

How does she laugh? I like my laugh when I do it. I have been told that my smile and laugh are genuine and make people feel good. I don’t want to reduce myself to faking a laugh or acting coy. When I laugh, I want to feel good and others to feel good.

What is her energy like? Oh, this is a tough one and one that I am working on. I have been told that the vibe I have is soothing. The person who told me this has typically seen me in environments where it takes me a long time to get comfortable. I try not to bring negative energy even if I feel it. I rather sit alone and go nowhere than bring bad energy  to an area. I have been told that I bring sunshine and light into spaces. I like that energy. However, when people ask me how I am, I usually respond that I am tired. Lately I really have been, however, that is not the energy I want to give off. Goal 2: Bring the energy I want to feel into the space I am in. No more “I am tired” answers.

What type of house does she live in? My dream home is so expensive right now. Currently, I rent a town home with my mom because life is happening. I don’t know how long we will live together, but I will always make sure my mother is okay. I have been thinking in the last few weeks when I would like to buy a home. The answer is I don’t know, but when I do, it will be amazing. I want a wrap around porch that looks out into a yard. There is a perfectly placed sunroom to be warm (not hot) in the middle of the day. The sunroom will have an exit to the backyard where there will be a firepit/grill area. Did I say this is a two story home with a finished basement? Entering the from the front door is a mudroom to one side and a small library to the other. Mudroom is for coats and dirty shoes. I haven’t decided if shoes will be allowed in my home yet.  The library will double as an office but it will have a bay window and comfy seating. Walls will be shade of burgundy or purple or green to allow it to be dark when I want it to be but bright the minute the window currents are open. The living room will be comfortable for hosting but most family time and game nights will be spent in the basement. A guest room will be on the first floor for older family members or my mom if she is still with me. The kitchen is special. An island, double oven, gas stove, and plenty of space. Sometimes I don’t mind people being in the kitchen with me. I want enough space in the kitchen to allow that. A walk-in pantry will be there. Now the debate is whether the laundry room should be on the first or second floor. I am a fan of the second for ease but first so I don’t hear it. If it is on the first, I want a laundry chute and the room has to be off the mudroom. The second floor is for bedrooms obviously. Master has its own bathroom with an amazing shower set up. The total number of rooms depends on how many kids I have. Ideally, I also want a garage with a gym attachment as well. Goal 3: Decide if I want to buy a house and when.

How does your ideal self react when things don’t go the right way? This is something else I am working on. Lately, the stress of work has been making me react harsher than I want to. On Thursday, I had to get up and go to my car to cry in anger. My therapist tells me I need to feel instead of rationalizing. Sometimes, in the moment, you can’t feel. I don’t want to raise my voice or use poor vocabulary. I don’t like yelling at bad drivers but I do it. I want to react with grace until I am able to feel. Walk away and let no one take pleasure in how I react. They don’t need to know. Goal 4: Learn to react with grace.

Now that I have this image in my head of my ideal self, I am going to work on habits and activities that could lead me to being her. That is a post for another morning…I think I can fall back to sleep now.

[citylightconfessions]

As much as I'd like to share my name with you, you can call me A.

I was/am AFAB but since my detransition my edges are a bit more rugged than they used to be, and that's okay.

The love of God found me after I got out of the military- when I wanted to take my life at the age of 22.

He has been with me since.

I like poetry, cats, heated blankets on rainy days, skateboarding, and Minecraft cottages.

I'm here because Tumblr has been a place of comfort for me since I was a young adult- and still is.

[thelatebloomerdiaries]

[raoulduke]

The best and most significant thing that happened to me when I turned 30 was that I suddenly and inexplicably stopped caring about shit that used to keep me awake at night. I have never felt “pretty” until now. I have a new appreciation for my body, especially considering that it grew, birthed, and nourished my sweet little boy. I’m embracing things I shied away from all these years, and loving—feeling—with abandon, no holding back, where I used to hide and escape with drugs. I’m embracing my past for what it taught me, and holding fast and hard to my sobriety & recovery. I’m recognizing my life for the miracle it is. I’m hopeful for a full and bright future. I’m saying “fuck you” to toxic positivity and embracing real, radical joy.

Also, fuck bras and shaving my legs.

Turning 30 has been fucking awesome tbh.

[khaotick8]