#this is already ripping my heart out ahhhhhhh

[seiya-starsniper]

memory loss hurt comfort prompt for the wip game 👀

Ooooo anon, I hope you're ready for this, there's gonna be A LOT of hurt before we get to the comfort here:

It was a beautiful day. Again. The sun was shining. Again, The birds were singing. Always the same song, the same length, the same, the same, the same. The sun was shining, but now it felt cold and hollow, not warm and inviting. There was something very wrong about where he was, and now that he was paying attention, Hob fits the pieces together to form a very simple conclusion. He was dreaming. He’d been dreaming for the entire time he’d been in this cottage. The knowledge suddenly alerts Hob to a deep ache in his muscles and bones. Wherever his waking body was, it wasn’t here, and it hadn’t moved or been moved in a long time.  Too long, his mind supplies.  Wake up, he tells himself. He’d always been able to get himself to wake up if he knew he was dreaming. But it doesn’t seem to be working this time.  Wake! Up! He tells himself over and over to no avail. Wake up, wake up, wake up!  Nothing. 

also tagging @five-and-dimes since this is related to a prompt they sent me 👀

[minniepetals]

Ahhhhhhh this is long long overdue but you know when you want to cherish and savour something so you hold onto it? That is ALWAYS me whenever I see a chapter update and CMAR is the ANGSTIEST angst that continues to rip me apart more and more with every chapter, every word, every painstaking moment when the guys STILL DON'T KNOW. And only now...NOW Namjoon's realised that for over a DECADE everything they thought they knew, everything they assumed, every thing he and the rest of them inadverently caused by sending her BACK to the monster who abused and broke her....they don't even KNOW yet and I can FEEL the tension, my heart's thrumming MAD with the anticipation because as broken and bruised as CMAR makes me... I willingly surrender my heart to all the damage all over again. I can't wait to see how it'll pan out (and I know your writing is on pause which makes the wait all the more achingly ANGSTY and I'll wait forever for your art so 😖😖🤧 no rush EVER I hope you always know that despite everything because people who cherish your art and your writing and just YOU are such an amazing person...then they'll wait!)

And reading this chapter...like EVERY chapter makes my heart crumble but like I said I've entrusted the broken shards of my heart to you to do with as you will.

Reading this particular chapter and the aching scene with Mister Butler and her 🥺🥺 gave the title of this story a whole new meaning for me. Because Mister Butler would've ALLOWED her to cry a river's worth of grief and tears, held her through it and told her he loved her on the other end of it. Every chapter builds such emotional raw DEPTH but it really and truly struck me so deeply that he could've said those words to her.

"Cry me a river young miss. I'll love you anyways" something like that and just KNOWING him... how much he ached to protect her, how much he loved her... It just really and truly hit HARD 😭😭😭

Thank you so so much for writing and sharing and for always gifting us with your talent. I hope your comission works go well🥺💜 and always known we'll wait...I will wait FOREVER for this story and your writing.

Hope you're having a warm winter 🥺💜

bub!!! 😭😭😭😭 i always love it when you go in depth and tell me all the things you're thinking of when reading cmar bruh it gives me serotonin.

our y/n is struggling so hard. her chanting those false words of being mister butler's killer not only made namjoon go crazy but it made her go mad as well because for the longest time, her father gaslighted her into believing she was the killer and her saying those words to namjoon was like giving herself the punishment of not being able to save him because she regrets so much of what happened and she does feel guilty for being that person that held him back and made a little brother lose a big brother (because y/n knows to some extent of namjoon's own pain since he shared that part of himself with her in the past). it's honestly just really heart wrenching and i just want her to get closure already but that won't happen anytime soon 😭

also like i need some recs on some good groveling because i need the boys to GROVEL after abandoning y/n like that i literally searched up how to write good groveling but google stinks i need actual examples in books lmao.

cmar's on hold but my plans for it...next chapter's already made me cry

[rosyfingereddawnn]

I don't need Ghost recs because I already listen to them, but I'm curious what your favorite songs are!! Feel free to explain why!! I'd love to know!!

ashley my darling!! <33 thank you so so much for the ask and for enabling me !!! it has been a task listening to anybody who is not ghost lately actually which……. idk how to feel about that. anyways i have a lot of favourites so this needs to be under the cut. also i am listening to ghost as i write this. sorry <3

spillways - this one. is so so so good and cathartic honestly??? it is so so catchy and the instrumentals make me insane <3 god the vocals/harmonies too???? also it’s just so good for the religious trauma i am screaming it constantly

cirice - sexy sexy sexy sexy need i go on. honestly the INTRO makes me freak out. the intro. and look. i have watched many a video of terzo singing this both acoustic and otherwise and oh god it’s become such a favourite. also religious trauma healed (a common theme here actually !!!)

watcher in the sky - BASS BASS BASS BASS BASS. oughhhhhhgggghggh and the solo near the end. where the two guitars join in together literally it makes me batshit just listening.

crucified - okay i know this one’s a cover but tbh (i’m biased) i like it better than the original??? the whisper-singing is Sooooo good thank you papa 2. honestly the instrumentals also just make me insane i feel like this is a good song for a horror movie somehow??? vampire core tbh. it’s just such a vibe all the way through.

darkness at the heart of my love - NO WORDS. ABSOLUTELY NONE. NO SYLLABLES ESCAPE FROM ME. god this one is an emotional rollercoaster it feels like a hug it feels like a slap in the face i can’t BELIEVE ghost’s ability to just. slay every fucking genre/subgenre. god it makes me ascend

monstrance clock - this one makes the list because i keep thinking of what it would be like live???? i think i would simply explode???? i mean let’s see sex appeal insane instrumentals vibey vocals thank you papa for my rights <3

kaisarion - VIBIEST SONG EVER GOD it is truly so amazing. it’s so upbeat and powerful it’s like i just drank 32 monster energy drinks. god the GUITAR is just inexplicably so good in this one. i can’t.

waiting for the night - cover #2 to make the list and it is so much better than the original sorry eat my ass depeche mode. god. god. peak breakdown song tbh. i mean the first parts a lil spooky and then your heart gets ripped out and then you shake ass !!!!!!! god.

from the pinnacle to the pit - AHHHHHHHGGGGGGHHHHHGHHHG. okay first of all the lyrics just feel like pop rocks in the ol head tube. okay. once again so varied and also like. the drums and guitars………. i’m fine. also terzo :((((((

see the light - ULTIMATE hate song. like i don’t think many of their songs make me as Cathartically angry as this one (except faith. but that’s another post) but it’s also so pretty at times??? like they’re so good at switching the narrative here. once again the Talent that this band has.

nocturnal me - SEXY. ALL AROUND SEXY. GUITARS SEXY BASS SEXY DRUMS SEXY VOCALS SEXY PAPA SEXY. UGGHHHGGHHGGH

deus in absentia - ASCENDING BRB. i don’t even have the words in my vocabulary to describe this one it’s just so good??? the lyrics are so so well-written and the images you get from it are soooo potent and interesting and then the instrumentals as always fuck hard.

bible - cover #3. SO SO SO SO FUCKING UNDERRATED I WILL NOT TOLERATE ANY BIBLE SLANDER. people say it’s too slow??? ARE YOU LISTENING?????? ARE YOU ASCENDING TOO????????????? tbh it kinda makes my religious trauma worse but also it heals it ???? because who WILL pray for babylon 😔 anyways wow just. sobbing crying yelling

he is - papa lullaby thank you <3 once again potent imagery beautiful lyrics (bisexual music video) it’s just so beautiful and lovely i want the soundwaves tattooed on my face.

griftwood - AHHHHHHH. OKAY. okay. first of all this song has like 3 distinct sections that are all interesting and genuinely very good and actually the last part with the choir????? whispering GOOD?????? also layered harmonies okay i’ll shut up. ughhhhgghhggh :((( so nice so lovely. also guitar. good song for guitar. yeah. i can’t say anything but nice things about griftwood <3

imperium - purely an instrumental song and it’s so unfair cause it gives me chills the second it comes on without fail. the climax of it ????? where the guitars pile on and it’s just ??????????? ugh. fuck

i believe - a slower song but still i um. am Fine about it and not obsessed at all. first of all tobias’ vocals in this song specifically i want to Chew and Eat and Munch. ugh i can’t even say enough about it it’s just so so lovely. very pretty <3 the way everything swells and just. OUGH

respite on the spitalfields - OKAY. OKAY THIS. THIS IS ONE OF (IF NOT) MY FAVOURITE SONGS POINT BLANK RIGHT NOW. first of all. distinct parts broken up by such a BANGING SOLO I NEED IT IN MY MOUTH N O W. it’s just……… i don’t even know what it makes me feel but i know i like it. GOOD good song for bass. oughhgghgg. harmonies throughout like. all of it are just so good. lyrics????? literally impeccable. “nothing ever lasts forever we will go softly into the night” gets me specifically for some reason idk. RIFF FROM IMPERIUM AT THE END ??????????????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! also the way it Grows into the choruses and the repeating verses. goooood :(( there’s plenty more to say but this is already too long goodnight <333

GOD IM SO SORRY THAT WAS EXCRUCIATINGLY LONG. and i wanted to add more but i didn’t want to keep torturing you still <3333 here’s a cookie and a cup of tea (🍪☕️) for anyone that actually made it to the end of this i should give you financial compensation but i’m broke <3 anyways i love ghost and i love you ashley 😌 truly you do not know how much it means to me that you even sent this ask 🥺

[art-i-know-yes]

SPOILERS FOR LIMITED LIFE FINALES

im in class

Tango's Pov

rip skizz pour one out

laaaaassstttt epissoooooddeee

rough session is...yeah

"im the lowest!" "that's why you're in charge"

hiding. the plan is hiding.

Martyn always plans names

already bombing

team merge

bread bridge 2 is the hellscape

learning your lesson

scott is NOT waiting

Nosey Neighbors, TIME, Scott, and The Clockers

yeeeeaaaaahhhhhh

rule #1 is to always look up

one death and Etho is GOONNEE

grian scream :D

grian death :(

wow he wanted his time back

right back at him

BDUBS

awww ur soulmate

that looks awful

TANGO

oooo wasn't grian

surprise scar

14 MINUTES

they're hunting each other

DID THE BORDER MOVE

FALL DAMAGE

when did cleo die

rip tango

Scott's POV

whatcha doing babe

silent huh

YOU'RE NEARLY YELLOW

that's a lie

i just got Grian's notification

not for long

oh so martyn actually left the mean gills

im so excited to who's gonna win bc is not The Clockers

real time bomb set up

so...it went badly

one death

ok kinda figured it was planned

yes. very important to the deal.

gg babe

im so excited for Grian's pov bc wtf

like I know it's a game but like

scott dies in here

'sorry spilled my lava'

jinx

yeaaahhhh

a lot is happening

some of them hours

he's really just handing them out

scott is terrifying is the lesson

my heart

rip babe cause like

scott loses this game so sorry Beyonce

knew it was a play

"impulse :["

grian babe you had 5 hours. to have lost a solid 3.

OMG

Scott's--UGHH. the music he put scared me and THEN he backed away off the ladder. my heart.

GRIAN--WHY YOU ALWAYS AFTER SCAR

ALL THE CLOCKERS ARE OUT

"underwater?" "underwater." *next clip not in the water*

"i just wanna talk"

oooo they do (another headcannon lmao pearl and grian are siblings. of course very popular)

forgive each other's sins

"you can't see it from the ground" -joel

it's just up and up

so under bread bridge

plz no

grian is a 'yes and' man

GRIAN'S HACK

DIVE BABES

well there goes them

who died there

peaaaarll

RUN BIGB

HELL YEAH

"round table of compliments" for skizz!

scott keeps looking up and it's so funny

awwwwww

"you scare me" "awww"

"and now we kill each other"

rip bigb

bigb hacks

byeeeee dan

betrayal arc from i e

"martyyynnnn they tried to kill me" "who what where" "impulse and ethoooo" "alright they're dead" it's so cute

side note: my favorite thing out of this season is people being like 'this is a kindergarten playground.' i love it so much bc it's keeps it fun and cutesy. still love my angst tho

MEAN GILLS love em

the idea of everyone being like 1 or 2 deaths kicking them out the game is like exhilarating

oh. martyn.

NOO GRIAN last 6

everybody's off

BYEEE ETHO

Scott's so good

bye bye PEARL

mean gills vs impulse

8 minutes

even playing field

AHHHHHHH MARTYN

I figured it be one of them

HE WON YES OOO MEAN GILLS

babe said put him down

"my own mean gill. and i wouldn't have it any other way."

ya know the entire sun, star, moon win thing we got going on. well we have the Listener/Watcher which kind of fits in.

this is the the second time I've learned who won by actually watching and not just looking it up

Grian's Pov

solidarity. huh.

"my stuff"

i did vaguely think about boogey

well i wonder if that happens

"it works!"

well. there's that trap.

where's your mother

"went out for milk with the neighbor" lmao

oh. well. good idea.

he really is bc he's been wandering like this entire ep

literally did not hear a word from Grian other than a scream in...there

they're bullying him/j

was that a grian kill? i thought that was a tie kill

bad boy till the end

fun fun fun for the boy

the silent fights are the best bc you know they're all stressed

oh you created that one the sky height

IT WAS GRIAN

awww his cackle

it genuinely makes me very happy

he's just begging

ohhh that explains that one

oh that was pearl's

OH HE GOT CLEO TOO

final kills should give an hour

this season nobody actually ran out of food

like piranhas

too bad neither was right

the bridge will provide

potato pier will also provide

ok so i was right

gUlp

ya know each session is like 3 hours and so 8 episodes is basically 24 hours

oh so if you're in the same side you can't do anything but lmao

"MY BREAD"

babe just drowned

50 SECONDS

from every angle

what kills you grian I'm so curious but i have 8 more minutes

it's the feeling of being a badboy

awww scar's little 'cUtEgUy"

PROTECT THE PODCAST

ohhhh OHHH BC HE GAVE ETHO THE SWORD

even stevens

it's just loop and loop and loop

"pearl-friends PEARL.FRIENDS."

pearl is too feral

good luck

this music

WOOOOWWWW. YOU PULLED A JIM. YOU PULLED A JIMMY.

rip my bad boy

"ooOOOOoOooO spooky"

you did well tho. very good.

Jimmy. jimmy please. I SO BADLY WANT TO KNOW YOUR REACTION.

sighhhh the bad boy way spreads. they all died on bread bridge.

MARTYN'S MY LAST ONE AND I WOULD HAVE ACTUALLY FINISHED THE SERIES THE DAY OF AND NOT MONTHS AFTERWARDS...

Martyn's Pov

very excited to watch.

im listening on 2x speed bc he mostly with views I've watched

untrue and you know it

very funny fast speed voices

water people love it

oh he did that

oh so much happened

fast suspense music

for the /j

"Wow this map is huge" Yeah literally half of the map was just ignored

3 numbers that kill you from boat drop

you know the fact that Scott let them do that but i guess it makes sense bc he's pretty honest but

wow martyn

nope just Grian

he was instant with that jump

he killed etho WOO

mad maneuvers

almost pulled a tango

had to change it back to normal speed. headache :(

mean gills double team

you got him with his own bucket

scott was putting on work

'hard sweat hard sweat why you gaming so hard'

4 hr 8 min

like our fore fathers who watch on

lmao went insane

why we counting down

fair. ominous.

back here

OH YEAH I FORGOT ABOUT THE FRAGMENT SOUL THINGS

is he free from being a Listener now that his soul is safe

im so spacey that i can't really understand

ok wait. there are watchers. they are Listeners. not free but still trying to run away from a choice. after each perma death(?) [for martyn] there's a soul fragment and woven together they make his soul.

that's the gist, right?

ANYWAY THATS THE END AND AHAHHHHHHH IM SO HAPPY HE WON WOO

annnnddd im actually caught up on every pov bc the first 2 i only watched grian and in dl i got too behind and only watched grian's finale (as well as Jimmy's but...we all know how that ended)

anyway im happy. im scared to read angst. and i really want to see more of the kindergarten playground au type beat. but. yeah. that was fun.

[abigail-nicole]

tgcf liveread 9

being the live-read of that time i read tgcf for the first time, truly a magical experience i would recommend to all, if you like gay stories, fantasy stories, or perfectly-written stories, then perhaps buy official english translations of Heaven Official's Blessing

originally tweeted 4/1/2020:

I also can’t want to see this animated, in five years when the donghua gets to it

gays pointing out misogyny

Another little mxtx horror gem featuring bai wuxiang

this Thing Obviously Impersonating Hua Cheng (But Doing A Bad Job) is adding so much extra horror to a scene which is already filled with creepy, fleeting glimpses of Bai Wuxiang. Horror level 10

nicely done confirmation that Fu Yao and Nan Feng were just Mu Qing and Feng Xin for a long time. That was pretty obvious from the dynamics

hahahahshahshsjs omg this dynamic

I literally burst out laughing so loudly at this fourth wall call out by Mu Qing & Feng Xin

the Cave Full Of Statues Of Himself thing is INCREDIBLY creepy !!!!!

i screamed in my empty apartment

.... i need to do some online shopping & process this a second while I think about buying an eighth bathrobe

so this is kinda like Hua Cheng’s stalker cave huh, while he was hoping to play it cool

I say that with LOVE i still adore crimson rain sought flower and hualian

He’s all like I HAD THE RED STRING, I GAVE HIM THE RING, WHY THE ASSHOLE CHILDHOOD FRIENDS GOTTA COME ALONG AND EXPOSE MY STALKER CAVE

Rip feng xin & mu qing who are about to get murdered by hua cheng

who IS the white-clothed man who is CLEARLY the favorite to win Mt Tong’lu’s Next Top Ghost King??? I’m scared of him & Hua Cheng better step up

it’s....Him, isn’t it....!!!!!!!!

HE BOYFRIENDS LOVE EACH OTHER THEIR LOVE CAN WITHSTAND THE STALKER CAVE.

ok I was wrong nothing was impersonating hua cheng But he Was acting suspicious. Like, What If He Finds Out How Long I’ve Liked Him, What If He Realizes I Was A Nerd In School And Filled My Locker With Art Of Us suspicious

ahhhhhhh Clean Water, Pure Air,,,,,, Hualian Happy Together

Xie Lian: oh no

Hua Cheng: what? I won’t let Bai Wuxiang get near you!

Xie Lian: Oh no.....it’s so hot when you’re mad.....

Xie Lian’s reaction to seeing the cave that Hua Cheng filled with statues and art of him: so he DOES like-like me!!!!

When I found out where his ashes were & spoiled it for myself I was so mad & now these cryptic comments are even MORE ROMANTIC

A WISP OF HUA CHENG BACKSTORY? I’M SO STARVED FOR IT

“It’s not like it’s anything hard” UNLIKE XIE LIAN’S DICK AFTER THIS SCENE OH MY GOD I NEED TO LIE DOWN

Hua Cheng is about to Ghost King Level Up!!!!!!!!!!! Watch Out!!!! Oh my god

Every time I turn a page I expect AND SCENE! END OF BOOK THREE!!! is it gonna be KISS? is it gonna be HANDS HOLD JUMP INTO KILN? its gonna be somewhere Maximum Suspense is reached

THE SUSPENSE HERE IS KILLING ME AHHHH it just KEEPS BUILDING

the suspense is so bad that....I better stop reading & tweet every other paragraph so I can scream more about how AHHHHHHHHHH i am about this

I clearly remember every book I read that made me start wanting to eat the pages halfway thru because I was so into it & this is one

REMEMBER WHEN I TALKED ABOUT GHOST KING MAGICAL GIRL FLOWER CROWN MARTIAL PRINCE XIE LIAN WELL

Hahaha and THERE is the end of book 3 okay oh boy someone get me a beta blocker for my heart rate oh god

Predixns: Book-4-flashback.mov then I suspect our dianxia will just turn up in a forest somewhere, having gently jumped ahead several months, been missing, collecting trash, and there will be Some Backstory & we’ll never get the details of how he came out of the Kiln

Predixns the sequel: while dianxia is trapped in the Burial Moun—I mean the Kiln, the world will go to shit & hua cheng will be Big Mad & Take It Out On Everyone

I read this on april fool’s because I am The Fool

More proof xie lian is god of millennials: centuries of eating trash and being free while ignoring the news

Book Four! Starting next time on tgcf liveread part ten!!!!

[elai-okonma]

Chapter 9. Ain’t Afraid To Die

Thank you to everyone who is still here<3 And a very special thank you to @obeymekookie for always supporting my work <3

Warnings: violence, etc. 

Word count: 2,308

Celestial Realm

  You hear faint talking, though you can't really pinpoint who or where it was coming from. You try to open your eyes but the lids are just too heavy. You decide that if you can’t use your eyes to figure out what’s going on, then you would just use your hearing. You focus all your energy to hear what’s being said, and who is saying it. 

“...you know damn well what you are doing Michael…”

“...you think we are none the wiser because we aren’t Archangels…”

“...she was human before she was an Angel, she doesn't know the customs here in the Celestial Realm…” 

  You’ve confirmed that it was your two friends talking to Michael, but you hadn’t heard Michael say anything in response. What were they talking about, anyways?? You were fully conscious now, but thought it best to pretend to still be sleeping. You wanted to know what was going on, but had a feeling that you’d get more information by just staying right where you were. 

  “...this isn’t right, and you know it…”

“...you should at least know the truth about her while she is still unaware…”

“...MC died in the Devildom, at the hands of Belphegor. She died violently and she suffered greatly before he took her life…”

“...she’s also in love with the brothers, and if Lucifer finds out about what you’ve done, we are sure to have another war on our hands. Is that what you want, Michael??...”

  You hear the Archangel speak for the first time now.

  “...MC loves my fallen brothers??...”

  “...she loves them more than herself and is prepared to fall for them. She’s already spoken to Father about it...she knows the price and she’s willing to pay it…”

“...your pact with MC cannot be. She will not stay by your side, she won’t even stay by Fathers. Nothing you can say to her will make her change her mind, either. She’s dead set on returning to them, to the Devildom…”

  You hear Kyo and Elai start to choke up. You knew they didn’t want you to go, but they support you nonetheless. You hear what sounds like a sigh come from Michael. 

  “...what will you do when she falls?? It's clear that you don't want her to leave...”

 “...we honestly don’t know. It breaks our hearts that she will be leaving us, but we as her friends will support her, no matter what happens…”

“...you need to tell her what making a pact with you entails. Tradition or not, she won’t agree to it…”

  You start to hear high pitched ringing in your ears, now. It’s almost unbearable, but you concentrate on the conversation the three are having. 

  “...a pact formed with an Archangel cannot be undone -RRRRRIIIIIIIINNNNGGGG- she won’t be able to break the -RRRRRIIIIIIINNNNGGGG- either. She will have to realize that her place is -RRRRIIIIIINNNNGGG-...”

  FUCK, what was this noise?? It feels like your head is about to split open. You can’t listen anymore, you can’t even think with this noise assaulting your ears. You had no idea what Michael was even saying at this point. No longer able to pretend you were asleep, you jolt up and clutch your head. 

  “MC?! MC, WHAT’S WRONG?!”

  “The ringing, make it stop!” you yell.

  “You hear the rings, MC?? Those are the Celestial Bells, they signal something serious is happening.”

  “Why are they so loud?!” you gasp out.

  “It’s only loud because you’re not used to your power yet. All your senses are heightened now, so it’ll take some getting used to.” Michael responds.

  “How long are they going to ring?! My fucking head...it’s too much…”  you trail off. 

  “It should be stopping soon. MC, besides your new hearing, how else do you feel??”

  You try to think of a reply to his question, “overwhelmed,” is all you say.

  “You handled receiving my power very well, MC. You’re the first person, Angel or otherwise, that I’ve done this with.”

  With the ringing finally stopped, you take a deep breath and tell Elai and Kyo to go leave you for a minute. They oblige, and step outside. Now, with it just being Michael and yourself, you get serious.

  “I heard you and my friends talking. I want answers.”

  “Of course, love.”

  You don’t care for the look on his face. You also don't let it go unnoticed that he just called you love. 

  “Please don’t call me that.”

  “Why not?? You don’t like it??”

  “I am not your love, they are in the Devildom. I heard Kyo tell you about my being in love with your brothers, and it’s true. I love Lucifer and the others, and I do plan to go back to them as soon as possible.”

 Michael looks away from you before starting:

  “MC, i’m going to be honest with you, forming a pact with an Archangel, is not something that is done. One of the reasons being that no one makes it through the process. Another reason being that no one is worthy of such divine power, but the other reason is that…”

 He was cut off when he heard a familiar voice booming from behind him:

  “MICHAEL!”

  You look past the Archangel and see the last person you were expecting to see, standing there. Your eyes widen at the familiar face, and their eyes widen in return. 

  “S-SIMEON?!”

  “MC, I KNEW I SMELLED YOUR SCENT! WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?!” the Angel runs to you and pulls you into a hug, tearing up at the reunion. 

  You hug him back tightly, and let your tears flow. Your first familiar face since you came to the Celestial Realm almost a month ago. Simeon lets go and looks in your eyes, dead serious, now. 

  “MC, is it true that you made a pact with Micahel??”

  “H-how did you know that??”

  “I ran into Kyo, and Elai on my way here. I followed your scent as soon as I got back, I had to see for myself if it was really you. MC, do you realize what you’ve done, by forming a pact with Michael??”

  “No, but he was just about to tell me, RIGHT Michael??”

  You look back over to Micahel, and Simeon looks at him, as well. With a deep breath he confesses:

  “MC, the other reason pacts with Archangels are...difficult...is because it's also a mating pact.”

  You suck in a breath as your mouth drops open. For the first time since you’ve known him, Simeon looks disgusted. 

  “W-w-what are you t-talking about?? A mating pact??”

  “It means that you are betrothed to me. That you are mine.”

  You haven’t felt this level of anger and betrayal since Belphegor killed you. What the fuck was this prick Angel talking about?? He must be OUT OF HIS FUCKING MIND!! If there were anyone you belonged to it was Lucifer and the others, NOT MICHAEL. You’re yelling now:

  “WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK, MICHAEL. WHAT DO YOU MEAN I’M BETROTHED TO YOU?! WHEN DID I ACCEPT THAT ARRANGEMENT?!”

  “You accepted when you agreed to form a fact with me, MC. Remember, you said you’d do anything to get back to your Demons.”

 “NOT THIS, MICHAEL. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO-”

  You’re quiet now, as you look to Simeon, and then to the area where Elai and Kyo were standing. They were panting from sprinting in after hearing you yell. You look back to Michael and smile. Smile the most sadistic smile you could, an action that would make even Lucifer scared. A low growl left your throat, and Simeon took a step back. Michael looked ready to flee, wings spread and twitching at the sight before him. You took the chance to let your own wings emerge, the light from your newly bestowed halo on top your head pulsating with your heartbeat. Your three friends look between each other now, ready to restrain you if need be. Your sigils from the Demons lighting up and floating just above your skin took everyone by surprise, including yourself. You forgot you had them, assuming they were gone since you died. 

  “M-M-MC, please, take a deep breath and think before you made your next move.”

  “Shut up, Michael! Just SHUT UP!”

  “MC, he’s right, please, you need to calm down. You’re going to overwhelm your body again, if you keep this up.”

 “ALL OF YOU, SHUT YOUR TRAPS!” you scream at the top of your lungs, shaking the columns of Michael’s house. 

  “MC!!-”

  But it was too late. In a flash of light, you were behind Michael, laughing maniacally as you grab one of his wings and start to rip it off his body. His screams, like music to your ears. 

  “AH-AHHHHHHH!!!! MC, STO-AAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!”

  You growl once more, but your friends are on you now, tackling you to the floor. Michael steps away immediately as his hand comes up to where his wing was dangling off his back. He looks over to you on the floor, wings flailing about as the three Angels wrestle you down. 

  “LET ME GO!”

  “MC, you need to stop! You’ll be punished for this! You assaulted an Archangel!”

  “I DON’T CARE! LET ME GO!!”

  Michael uses his good set of wings to fly off. Seeing him leave makes you even more crazy. You push Kyo, Elai, and Simeon off of you to go after him, but the other Angels are right behind you. 

  Weaving through the night sky, you follow the scent of Michael’s blood. You can hear his desperate whimpers not far ahead, and you decide you need to get him out of the sky. I don’t know what I can do with these powers yet, but I need to think of a way to get him back on the ground. Then it dawns on you, shoot him out of the sky…

_____________________________________________________________

The Devildom

  The brothers cease their shouting when Simeon bolts out of the house. It was unlike him to do something so rude. After some time goes by, they hear a low rumbling coming from somewhere outside, they become still. 

  They run out to the garden and look around to see where the noise was coming from. Then they heard Levi gasp as they turned to him. They follow his gaze to where his eyes are and they can’t believe what they’re seeing. 

  The sky above them is lighting up all over the place, and Lucifer couldn’t stop himself from shaking. 

  “Angelic lightning bolts?! Is there another war happening?!” Asmo speaks up.

  “It can’t be. Why are they fighting?? Who are they fighting??” Beelzebub responds, stopping mid-chew. 

  Luci says something under his breath, and his brothers ask him to repeat what he just said. 

  “I said, does anyone else feel...weird?? Like, their skin is tingling??”

  The brothers look down at themselves, and notice what looks to be gold specs ghosting their skin. 

  “What is this?? It’s beautiful…”

  “...Celestial Ash…” 

  Everyone looks at their eldest brother when he says that. They were all former Angels, and they’d never seen this stuff before.

  “I’ve only read about it...I’ve never seen it…” Lucifer rubs his gloved fingers together, smearing the golden ash around, before admiring it.

  Asmo put his hands out like he was catching snowflakes. Levi and Mammon never took their eyes off the sky above them. They heard another low rumble, followed by shrill whirring noises. 

  “What in Diavolo’s name is going on up there??”

____________________________________________

Celestial Realm

  You were right on Michael’s path when you figured out how you were going to shoot him out of the sky. You took the deepest breath you could muster and opened your mouth, the same blue light from before came blasting out followed by a scream. How convenient, you think to yourself. You hear Simeon and the others behind you, but you just keep close behind Michael. Again. You open your mouth again, and let out a few bursts of light. The sky around you flashes bright, as you let out more short bursts of light. Your throat feels hot, and you struggle to keep up the rapid firing. One more. You can’t breath but you know Michael isn’t too far ahead. Almost there. You quickly catch up to the Archangel, and grab a hold of him. You come face to face with him and take another deep breath, ready to end this. You smash your lips to his. I’m going to make sure he doesn’t recover from this. As your tongue snakes into his mouth, forcing it open, you feel your throat heating up again, ready to let out more Angelic light straight into him. In a desperate attempt to escape, Michael grabs your hair and yanks you off of him enough to harden his wings. 

 “NO!” You scream, as Michael slips out of your grasp and falls down towards the water below. You swoop down to follow him, but he’s just falling too fast, weighted down by his wings. My light won’t penetrate through him with his wings armored. The Archangel is picking up so much speed you can hear the wind moving around him, a metal whirring sound, as he becomes aerodynamic. You reach out to him...So close.. as he plummets into the water. 

  “FUCK!!” you shout, as you stop just short of diving into the water yourself. You continue hovering at the surface, when Kyo and the others find you. Simeon makes quick work of detaining you, as he and the others fly back to land. 

  Now that you’ve calmed a little, you realize what you’ve done. Simeon’s voice comes out quiet but stern, 

  “MC, do you have any idea what the punishment is, for attacking an Archangel…”

  You look up to him, then to Kyo and Elai. Seeing the looks on their faces just confirmed the worst. This was a matter that was going to be handled directly by God.  

[gothamsglam]

Live reacting to Wonder Woman (2017)

Well first of all, I'm very gay, so Diana is GORGEOUS, love her outfit in the beginning

When the Wayne Interprises van showed up in the beginning my dad goes, "SHIELD???" (no buddy, wrong universe)

I screamed when I saw Baby!Diana

Diana go nyoom

OH SHE YEETED

OH SHE'S CAUGHT, that's epic!!!! love that scene

My aunt asked why Diana doesn't have more scars

My mom asked if they have hairstylists on the island

Ok so Greek gods, cool

When Steve showed up my mom thought he was captain america for like 4 minutes

So everyone agrees Diana's never seen a guy before right? Soooooo she's definitely some form of LGBTQ+, I hc Bi bc let's be real steve is a snack

When Diana was talking on the boat (about marriage and pleasure) it transitioned into a tide ad and I lost it

My Uncle: "She's called Wonder Woman because I wonder what she's doing" (he's already seen it, so he's just quipping the whole time)

"!!! A BABY!!" MOOD

HECK YEAH CLOTHING SCENE

I love Miss Candy, she's the best

Ah yes Badass!women, all I wanna see (Diana using the lasso makes me so excited, more fighting please)

IS THAT REMUS LUPIN???

ah yes sexism

I feel like there's alot of underlying -isms in this movie, hmmm

I'm such a sucker for people who know many languages, hhhhhh

"IM A SPY THATS WHAT I DO" AKSNJDKDKDMKSKS STEVE. Ok but him pulling out ths lasso made me lose it too

is steve a himbo???

hhhhh languages

Steve baby you need friends

DIANA THREW A MAN ACROSS THE ROOM THIS IS A BLESSED TIMELINE

Ah Remus is back again hell yeah (Sir Patrick or whatever)

I love Miss. Candy, she's the best

Ok so Diana in a coat is so HHHHHHH

Diana completely enamored with ice cream is both pure and a mood

The worst way to mature is to watch something you know you can't stop

HECK YEAH FIGHTING

Isn't her hair gonna hinder her?

OH DANG THAT'S ICONIC

Ok but can't they shoot her legs tho? Them thighs are unprotected

Diana really said YEET

"wait we never got a training scene with the lasso, how does she know how to use one?" "It's an innate trait"

Man I like Sameer alot, also he's a mood

Oh I forgot about the whole Ares thing honestly

"Sir, I'm losing you-Sir" AJJDJDJDKS HE'S SO FUNNY PLEASE

DANCING AWWWWWWWW

AWW DIANA'S SO CUTE WHEN SHE SEES SNOW AKSNDKSK (mood tho, I live in the south I don't see snow either)

I love how we could remove the kissing scene and like the movie would still make sense, I feel like a romance wasn't really needed, but Steve is cute and so is Diana so I say it's fine.

Charlie is babie, no I don't make the rules

Diana is so not gonna "stay put" right?

I've concluded Steve is a golden retriever, in fact all Steve's are golden retrievers

I wish I could go to a gala, I wanna wear a velvet dress

Steve man wtf, this is some weird small talk

OH YEAH A SWORD IN THE BACK OF A DRESS YESSSSS

NOOOOOO WAS THAT THE TOWN???? NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

So we accidentally fast forwarded and turns out there looks like there is an Ares! Who knew?

Ahajehjshsjs we got a Wonder Woman 1984 ad while watching Wonder Woman!

Oh Diana baby no

Ok but the way this conversation was so realistically portrayed??? Iconic of them

DIANA GRAB THE FRICKEN SWORD BEFORE I HAVE ANEURYSM PLEASE ITS A SWORD OF THE GODS WHY WOULD YOU LEAVE IT ON THE ROOF

HAHAHAHA I KNEW LUPIN WAS EVIL, (didn't think he was Ares tho, thought he was just a spy)

I TOLD YOU

oh she went up and got it, ok fine

Ok I thought she was Ares' kid but no, just Zeus

Classic manipulation, "jOiN mE"

HE LEFT HER THE WATCH AHHHHHHH MY HEART

The way I literally do not know what Ares is saying

NOOOOOOOO STEVE

I literally cannot see what is happening

NOT THE FLASHBACK WITH STEVE IMMA CRY

Unfortunately, I would have probably killed that nazi lady, rip to diana but I'm different

Did-Did she T-pose

Man that's the second time a Steve died in a plane via self sacrifice (Steve 2: Electric Boogalo)

Ok but if Steve died why did I see him in Pavi's gifs for the 2nd movie? Riddle me this DC

Aw she still has the watch

My dad: "Wonder Woman can use G-mail???"

Overall, lovely movie, very fun! I do feel bad about those who watched it like 3 years ago bc Steve died but I've seen him cast in the second movie??? Idk what's that's about but if so, that's one hell of a cliffhanger. I will say tho, I cannot think too long about this movie or less I will lose my mind, and I can't tell if that's in a good or bad way.

Can't wait to watch WW84!!!

[damejanai]

Dameraji

2020.12.02

S: Today...

K: Ou

S: I was at the same job as kaito kun before this, which was unusual

K: Mmm

S: This is a continuation from what we were talking about just now but...

K: Mmm

S: I went to rewatch Dame x Prince

K: Oh!

S: Well... that show was crazy in a good way

K: Totally unthinkable right

S: You know, totally, i wanted to watch some comedies, and, i don't really rewatch the ones i was casted in but totally you know... episode 1..Nareku, who is voiced by Kaito kun

K: Mmm

S: Started doing ad-libs all the way

K: Right?

S: Hngh! Hngh! Hngh! Aannn! uuun!

K: That's totally un actor-like

S: You just went ahead and did it right? *laughs*

K: Hahahaa

S: Nobody asked for...

K: Since he was moving so much, as an actor, that's totally a sign for me to do something right?

S: Totally.. well, i, you know, I hope you take my words seriously but, Nareku was so funny

K: Right?

S: Hahahhaha, so pure!!

K: Hahhaa, well it's not only me who created Nareku

S: Well well yes, it was totally, i want to do it again, with that team

K: Well but it won't have a second season, probably

S: Don't say that!

K: No but! those who have watched it would understand, the story had closure

S: That's true

K: The princes also matured. Amongst the comedy, the princes had growth

S: True...

K: Are we able to... return to that? Hahahahaa

S: I.....will i be able to do Ryuze?

K: ....Ehhh you can!

S: well.....nanodesu (high pitched)

K/S: HAHAHAHA

K: You did it!

~~~

Script: The streets are slowly beginning to look like Christmas eh?

K: Roppongi, or rather Keyakizaka? That area is totally..

S: *giggling*

K: Ah!!

S: Stop it! Stop it! I have recalled it!

K: I remember now!

S: For the details, please refer to... it's already in the archives? no?

K: But it was like from last year end, or the beginning of this year

S: Those who are able to listen please do...I too was... two men alone...what are you looking at? stop it stop it

K: It's still flashing...

S: Stop it! seriously... come on..

K: It was from then on right?

S: Stop it stop it, Recently you know... this is not good! like... i think this was my fault but... what was it about "from then on"

K: From then on, we began, right?

S: AHHHHH! WAhhhhh!! Ever since you started YouTube, you unlocked that kind of thing

K: AHahhahaa no no, what began was that I started driving Soma s-..... *giggle*

S: Hahahahahaa Oi! You don't have to do year-end tax adjustment for that too!

K: Oops, nothing's.. different

S: You know... I.... stop it? While doing Dameraji, the way we do radio has changed also?

K: Uh-huh

S: So, over there, when we spill our hearts out.. it has.. the buddy relationship has deep---*giggle*

K: I wonder why.... we... everyone has been saying that about us from the beginning..

S: Well well yeah

K: We being a pair, well regarding that, there was also a time when it was toned down...

S: There was, totally

K: Me especially

S: Well well, because of that, it became like, we should distance ourselves more.. right?

K: Stopped going for drinks, and stuff, well in times like these, more so, but it started even before this happened

S: Yes yes

K: I want to have a drink now! (together)

S: Me too, totally, shall we? Like before the year ends.. For Christmas?

K: Shall we? HAHAHA

S: Wahhhh, like, we are craving something

K: Craving.... no, we want to throw something away i think

S: Hahaha

K: This is bad, Okay! So the business talk shall end here

S: Hahahaha

-----

~Fanclub~

S: * Talking a bout how the space FC is 440yen per month*

K: Wait a minute, is that price okay for you?

S: We thought about it over and over

K: That's unacceptable! come on! That many services and that price... makes my membership quality seem lower

S: Don't cut in before i'm done with this email, geez

K: But anyway, your FC is finally starting

S: Until now, i've done one concert, so from now on, if i am going to have concerts, or release CDs, we'd like to give fanclub members priority, and we also wanted somewhere to communicate with fans, so decided on the name, "space".

It's the pace of S

K: Oh, "space" doesn't mean that there is a space in between huh

S: No no no, the name of the FC is "space". When I/we thought of it, i realised that it could have different meanings. Like Soma Saito's space, or a space for everyone, or outer space

K: Space right?

S: So decided on this name, it would be great if it is a space created by everyone

K: Nice~

S: But it is still in the works... we will be trying different things so the contents might be changing. I felt that this one song a day recommendation, is quite amazing

K: Yea it is amazing totally, what's recommend?

S: *giggles* Um, like a song a day depending on my mood, or a book, everyday

K: Are you serious?! Crazy

S: This is totally....Well to make it a place where you would want to visit everyday

K: Wow... amazing! amazing! Wait wait can you list out the services you're providing again

S: Mail magazine, one recommendation a day, one person radio with video, and also, bonuses

K: Well, and also you're going to think of new things from now

S: Yes

K:....... That overlaps with mine

S: Wwww well there's one email here too, Ishikawa kaito has started membership on his YouTube channel

.

.

.

.

K: And also actually I also have an FC ahahaha

S: Who would have thought, this is a coincidence right

K: Well you know, when i saw the news that Soma san was going to launch his fanclub, i was actually already in midst of creating mine but, i panicked, and panicked, i thought, oh no!

S: Hahahahaa

K: And posted a video quickly

S: So, like i've heard alot about how Kaito kun was going to have membership on his channel, right?

K: Umm

S: Then i said, ooh this would be good too right... and stuff, while behind the scenes, i was actually planning my FC

K: And also like, you know our services overlap too

S: Hahahaa, what will you be doing?

K: I will be holding live streams every month for members, well probably it'll be like 2-3 times per month

S: Amazing!

K: Livestreams where i just talk casually. And on YouTube "community", i will be writing stuff that happened, like a blog, and also after events or event streamings, i have done some already, i would quickly film my reflections/comments on the events and just upload them

S: Ahhh i guess well you have the chance to talk about those on radio sometimes but everyone would be interested to listen to Kaito kun's feelings about your events right?

K: Yes yes, so i thought, "recommendations huh?"

S: Well well well, that would be a total rip-off wouldn't it

K: Everyday...

S: But for me, it's contradicting but, i have a lot of jobs where i have to write now, but, i'm a poor writer

K: Ooooh

S: Like, i feel that it is hard to write

K: Well because you have too many options

S: Don't know if it's that but, i was thinking about whether i would be able to continue my blog properly. Well but if people were to be paying for the fanclub and the writings are not that good, that wouldn't be ideal so i thought, maybe i could recommend something different everyday

K: I'm so afraid now hahahaa

S: Ishikawa san's membership, is it a monthly payment?

K: Yes.. i wonder how much it was but, i made it really cheap

S: Ahhh

K: I searched up the services and prices of the memberships of other YouTubers, and made mine around the middle quality type of services, and the price low. I am not doing music as well, so the videos i upload might not be viewed as "highly priced" and that would feel horrible so

S: Ahhh, true...

K: And I manage the YouTube myself so, when i have guests over, i might need, outfits and stuff

S: Uh huh..

K: Or certain equipment.. like if we were to be playing games together, I would need to buy the game so... the membership fees would go to that

S: Wow... that's awesome~~ When... shall i go?

K: So, what shall we do?

S: Wwwwww what kind of ... what kind of reaction is that?

K: I thought of asking Soma san on the channel, well we did one story reading before

S: Yes

K: So i do want you to come but, i can't think of anything to do!

S: Come on come on, you're saying that there's nothing to do, in front of me?

K: Coz, we could just do it here

S: Ahh, we should differentiate it from this, things we can do that are not done on Dameraji

K: Yes, if it's the both of us, it'll inevitably be this

S: Hahhaaa, i wonder what...?

K: What, reminisce about "Zankyou no Terror"?

S: wwwww

K: Hahahhaa

S: "AAHHHHHH!! Remember, us" ah that's nine's line

K: Why are you snatching away my line

S: I was already shot before that

K/S: AHHHHHHH

S: Dun dun dun, dun dundun!

K: Ahhh cries~ cries~, Those who have not watched "Zankyou no terror," please do!

S: And well i really want to go on your channel, and i've already told my agency about this

K: Really? Ahh but your manager was nodding just now

S: Yes so it's safe to say that, it's approved already

K: Oooooh, ok so next i'll think about, what we are going to be doing

S: Shoudn't it be opposte?

K: Yess

S: Let's discuss then

K: Let's discuss, we have an expert here too

S: Won't that be Dameraji then!

----

~Dameraji photo studio~

Topic: Take a photo where the two photos would look like they're part of one photo

[supergirl-fanfiction]

No Greater Pain

Lena Luthor x Reader

Part 2 to Cheater

Requested by Anon

You are still hurt with what Lena did and you keep on ignoring her. Lena keeps on trying to get you back. One day Kara was affected with red kryptonite and attacks you.

(Y/N)- Your Name

Warnings- Language, Fighting/More like Torture, Death, Angst, Mentions of Blood and Alcohol

A/N- I broke my own heart with this

It had been a week since that night. You tried your hardest not to think about it and about all the feelings it had caused to awaken inside of you. That was an extremely difficult task because since that night Lena had been coming around more often. She would spend hours outside of your door begging you to let her explain herself, apologizing to you, and making all kinds of promises to you. You ignored it all to the best of your abilities but you could feel yourself slowly starting to want to hear her out. You still loved her even though you wanted to hate her. Maybe you should give her a chance to explain herself. If you let her explain herself maybe you could get some kind of closure and you could move past this part of your life finally. You sigh and shake your head.

"You're a dumbass. You should just file a restraining order and be done with this. Completely wipe your hands clean of her, but nooo that would be too simple wouldn't it. God why do I do this to myself." You mumbled talking to yourself as you took out your phone and typed in her number by memory. You could feel your hands begin to shake as you sent her a quick text telling her to meet you at Noonans at 1:00pm so she could explain herself and that if she was even 1 minute late then you would leave and she would be throwing away her one and only chance. You got a response back almost immediately telling you she would be there. You didn't send anything back. You just locked your phone and went to get ready for the day. You took a quick shower, got dressed, grabbed your camera, and left. Today was an amazing day for photos. Fall had just begun and all the leaves began to change colors. The sun shining down gave an almost angelic effect to the trees. It brought a small smile to your face. Fall had always been your favorite season because of the beauty that came with it. You had only been taking pictures for about 30 minutes when Supergirl herself had landed in front of you. You smiled at her and waved. You had always loved and supported Supergirl. She may have been more of a newer superhero but you thought she had been doing an amazing job keeping National City safe. Yet, something was different about her. She didn't smile or wave back at you like she always did with all the citizens. Instead she was glaring at you and her hands were curled into fists. Her whole body was tense, like one wrong move would make her snap. You began to feel nervous and decided it would be best if you just turned around and walked away. You had barely taken a step backwards before she was in front of you, her hand wrapped around your throat. You could barely breathe and you began to try and kick her even though you knew it was a wasted effort. The few people that had been around began to yell. Supergirl took one look at the people around her before taking off her hadn't still wrapped around your neck. You were terrified. You began to cry and try to beg her to just let you go.

"Oh, you want me to let you go. Ok." She had a sadistic smirk on her face as she then let you go. You opened your mouth to scream but nothing could come out. Your fear had ripped the breathe from your lungs. Right before you hit the ground she caught you by the ankle. You felt something break as her grip tightened and she let out a laugh as a scream finally ripped its way out of your mouth.

"Tsk tsk tsk. Humans are just so fragile."

"Wh...why are y..you do...doing th..this to m..me?" You managed to get out through your sobs. She just smirked down at you and didn't answer. Instead she just took off into the sky with you again. This time she took you out into the middle of nowhere. There was no one around to come save you. She dropped you down onto the ground carelessly causing you to land weird on your arm and you felt multiple breaks. You screamed out in pain as she laughed sadistically at your pain.

"I love hearing you scream in pain. It brings me joy." She titled her head to the side slightly as she looked at you.

"Now what to do with you? There are just so many options its hard to chose just one." You tried to scoot away from her but due to your injuries she had already caused it was almost impossible. She looked you up and down and then just smiled. It was terrifying. It wasn't her normal sweet Supergirl smile. No this one was filled with hate and anger. You saw her eyes begin to light up and you felt the fear take over your whole body.

"Wait please no don..AHHHHHHH!!!" You screamed out in pain as she used her laser eyes to burn you. She didn't do enough to kill you but every single one of your nerves were on fire. You couldn't get anything out. You couldn't beg for her to stop or for her to leave. The pain was all consuming and you could feel yourself drifting in and out of consciousness as Supergirl continued to torture you. You have no idea how long it went on until it finally stopped. You had burns from your chest down to your legs. bruises were covering every inch of your skin, you had lost count of all the broken bones you had, blood was flowing out of your body from multiple different places, and you knew that there was more damage than you could ever imagine. You heard people yelling and screaming. Then you heard Lena.

"(Y/N)! NO! NO! NO!" She ran over to you collapsed onto her knees beside you.

"Please god no. (Y/N) please just hang on. Just for a little bit ok. Just until we cannot you to the DEO. They can save you alright. Just please don't leave me please." You could hear her beg and even though every single minuscule movement hurt you forced yourself to turn your head to face her and reach out your hand to her. She carefully held your hand in hers and you could see the tears the were flowing like a river down her face. You gave her a small smile.

"Its ok Lena. You'll be ok." You rasped out before having a coughing fit. She shook her head causing some tears to fly off her face.

"We didn't even get to talk (Y/N) so just... just hang on beca....because I cant...I cant lose you. Not now not ev..ever." You felt your heart break just a little bit as you saw the pain in her eyes. You didn't want her to be haunted by her mistakes after you were gone.

"Its ok. I for...forgive y..you Le...Lena. I lo..love you st..still. For...forev...forever and al....always." You managed to get out before letting out one last shaky breath and the light drained from your eyes. Lena let out the most horrific pain filled scream anyone had ever heard before.

"NO! NO! (Y/N)! YOU CAMT LEAVE ME! PLEASE! SOMEONE PLEASE! HELP ME!" Alex came over and laid a hand on Lenas shoulder.

"I'm so sorry Lena." She whispered out. Lena shook her head before standing up and shoving Alex away from her.

"I never want to see you or Kara or any of you ever again." Lena said emotionlessly. Alex's jaw dropped and she tried to say something before Lena glared at her.

"If any of you try to come see me or talk to me I will kill you. I will show you just how much of a Luthor I truly am." Lena walked away after that. She couldn't stand to be around any of them anymore. She buried herself in her work and alcohol. The only time she had left her office was to attend your funeral. After that day she locked herself away from everyone and made a promise to herself that she would never love anyone else for as long as she lived because her heart would forever belong to you.

[faulty-writes]

Dedication To My Suneater.

Warning: Mentions of Anxiety 

Fandom: My Hero Academia 

Pairing: Tamaki Amajiki x Anixety!Reader 

Tamaki Amajiki, aka Suneater. The bravest and yet most anxiety-ridden Pro Hero out there. 

You had been a fan of his since he appeared on the scene and immediately you admired him for his skills and the fact that even with his social anxiety. He still managed to be a great Hero. 

You suffered from anxiety yourself and Suneater was such an inspiration to you. He gave you the courage to be yourself, to be brave and you hoped with everything in your being that you would be able to meet him face to face one day.

Well if you ever found enough courage for that, you had already struggled with months. Debating with yourself about writing him a fan letter, he probably got tons from others who shared the same struggle as you. Anxiety. Shyness. Being that quiet awkward person in the crowd.

What if he got your letter and treated it like the rest, read it once and toss it aside? 

You knew that was irrational thinking, Suneater wouldn’t just ignore his fans. Would he? 

Despite all your worries, you had eventually written a letter to your hero. Sharing your name, your dreams, how you too struggled with anxiety and how much he inspired you. 

Despite how nervous you were when you sent that letter, several months had passed before you had gotten what you hoped for and you nearly screamed when you saw it. 

A letter from the Fat Gum Agency, the very same Agency that Suneater worked under. You bounced on your feet as you opened the letter and eagerly read it. Apparently, there was going to be a Hero Convention and you could finally get the chance to meet your idol. 

“AHHHHHHH! I got Suneater’s signature!!!” you cried out when you reached the end of the letter where sure enough Suneater’s signature was squished between Fat Gum’s and someone named Red Riot. 

People looked at you as you danced with joy in front of your mailbox, speaking nonsense to yourself. “I have to get ready! What will I wear to the convention? I have to impress Suneater!” Though you were in your second year of school, you weren’t training to be a hero but you could still find some way to impress your idol. Quirk’s only went so far. 

For the next three weeks, you tried finding the perfect outfit and even rehearsed your lines, what you were going to say to Suneater when you met him when you finally met him! The thought alone was making you blush. 

Eventually, you settled on a dark top with ‘Suneater’ written across the top and some ripped jeans with converse. When the day of the convention arrived you were a nervous mess, your head hanging out down as you navigate through the crowd. 

Your face was flushed the entire time and your stomach twisted with butterflies and after a few hours, your anxiety was telling you to get out. That maybe this wasn't worth it. But you were quick to shoot it down. 

Shaking your head violently, you clenched your fists. “N-No! I c-can’t ...I want to s-see him so bad I c-can’t give up now! S-Suneater wouldn’t have given u-” your words were interrupted when you heard a shy voice breakthrough. 

“Uh, a-are you okay?” you felt your heart skip a beat at the same time your eyes widened. You knew that shy soft voice anywhere. Your face heated up as you slowly turned and there he was, Suneater. 

You felt a shiver go through your spine and your thoughts jumbled all at once, oh God! There he was! Dressed in his hero attire. That black bodysuit, those gold platings around his arms and shoulders. That cute white tunic and hood that so perfectly covered his head and that beautiful purple mask which not only matched his eyes but the vest he wore. 

You looked down and noticed he was barefoot as well and you could only think of how cute he looked, cute little Suneater. But you couldn’t say that to his face! Oh God ...you’d faint. 

“Uh I ...I S-Suneater I ...” you tried speaking but you were losing your words just as quickly and mentally kicked yourself, he was standing right there! Tell him how you felt! How much of an inspiration he is to you!

You took a deep breath and looked at him, trying to be brave. “I ...I’m such a h-huge fan! You i-inspire me so much! I ...I h-have anxiety too and ...a-and well. You ...y-you are so i-incredible! You g-give me the courage to b-be myself, to b-be brave against all odds.” you shared, though you felt your blush deepen and turned your glance away from him. Dammit, you probably sounded pathetic. 

Tamaki, on the other hand, had taken a step back. His face just as flushed as yours and though you couldn’t see it, he was nervously playing with his hands. His toes curling into the soft carpeting beneath him. 

“U-Uh ...” you heard him try to speak and slowly turned your head to look at him. His vision was to the floor and you almost giggled as you watched him play with his fingers, those nervous little habits were adorable. 

“I a-appreciate it! Um, I n-never thought I c-could inspire so many p-people uh, I-I’m glad I c-can make you f-feel brave.” Suneater’s words tugged at your heart, why was he so sweet and cute? You couldn’t help but want to squeal out.

“U-Uh w-what’s your name?” Suneater shyly asked, his eyes glancing at you before once again looking away and you practically danced on your feet. “Y/n! My name is y/n! Mister Suneater s-sir!” you watched him reach up to scratch his neck as he looked at you again, his lips pressed into a thin line. 

“T-That’s a nice n-name um ...I t-think you sent me a l-letter ....” your heart fluttered, Suneater said your name was nice and he acknowledged your letter. So he really did read it! Oh God ... you felt a giddy smile come to your face before the butterflies increased in your stomach,  you wanted to ask him something but you weren't sure if you could actually get the words out.

You swallowed and took a hesitant step towards your hero. “Um, S-Suneater c-could I um ...c-could I ...h-have a hug?”  

You watched him jump back as if you had burned him, though you noticed that even underneath that mask his cheeks were deep red. But it made you smile, Suneater was such a sweet man. You secretly wondered if he was dating anyone, he would be the perfect boyfriend. 

“P-Please?” you added sweetly and watched Suneater ruffle his hair, those nervous little eyes of his shifting back and forth before he finally settled back on you. Another moment of silence passing before he nodded. 

“Eeeeeyyy! Thank you!” you cried out before watching him spread his arms and eagerly you jumped at the chance, nuzzling into his chest as you wrapped his arms around him. Noticing just how tall and muscular he was and his scent, God ...it was enough to drive you mad. 

You felt him tremble, “Uh ....u-uh ...” he was probably nervous to have someone hugging him, but soon enough you felt his gentle arms wrap around you and a strange feeling came over you. It was almost like being wrapped in a security blanket. 

You felt utterly safe at that moment before you two stepped away from each other, though you looked at him with a smile. “Suneater ...I t-think you’re a wonderful hero and I ...I l-love you. I k-know that’s strange to say but ...o-one day I hope to ...to m-make a difference like you!” 

You watched his eyes widen, as though he had never heard those words before and a nervous chuckle left his lips. “I t-think you a-already have,” he said and a faint smile came to his face. “A-At least in my w-world ...” 

You choked back the gasp that threatened to come and you felt like crying, you hadn’t thought of how much heroes depended on the innocent lives they saved, how much the inspiration went both ways. 

“Uh S-Suneater ...a-are you busy later? M-Maybe we could um ...” you froze a moment, your face so hot you were beginning to get dizzy. “m-maybe we could walk around the c-convention together?” you offered and once more watched those eyes of his widen. 

“U-Uh s-sure I ...I-I’d like that. Um m-maybe around 6?” he squeaked out and you eagerly nodded. “Y-Yeah um, t-that sounds perfect! Thank you S-Suneater!” what a better miracle than to spend time with the hero you admire. “Uh I-I’ll see you then!” you said before turning on your feet to run to the closest door and once you passed it, you leaned against the wall. 

Your hand was to your chest and you could feel how violently your heart raced. You did it. “Thank you Suneater ...” you said as you tilted your head up, staring at the distance ahead of you. “I will always be brave for you.”

[repeterwiggin]

i decided to make notes as I watched POF (SVSR) for the second time and damn. it’s just as much of a rollercoaster even when you know what’s coming (warning this is long there’s a lot going on)

- wild to me how we jump straight in!

- lee & mary lee are adorable & also thomas at the wedding is a Mood literally me at all my friends weddings

- the flashback breaks my heart,

- Patton is still a really good trier... he’s so good and he tries so hard and I love him

- the way thomas rips off his suit jacket...

- the song that isn’t sung!

- Patton says “we four helped you” but there were five sides in svs hmm I feel like that’s probably significant in some way

- the ace attorney ref makes me very happy! there was a secret path of me hoping for for a professor layton reference but this is ehhhh kinda close?

- the fact that the first thing they say is “why didn’t we talk to lee and mary lee” like. yeah!!

- WE SHOULD START LOOKING I TO WAYS TO PREDICT THE FUTURE! he’s a little confused but he’s got the spirit

- patton and roman bffs!!

- feral cats,,, what a tangent i stan roman

- I like that we get some more context to the invite as well, like being asked face to face does add another element to the dilemma

- Dame Judy Dench = Queen Groovy Bench I see you using those Good Place swears, Roman

- “maybe they ... feel guilty” is like. I get where you’re coming from Patton but talking to them should’ve been step one imo like. I have been to lots of friends weddings and talking to them is important

- “I’m not sure there was a good ending to get” ... “for he’s a jolly good fellow!”

- them calling Patton out for how critical he’s been!!! very important!!! and I appreciate that Patton is trying “I’m just trying to help you be a good as you can be!” he still has more to learn but still im love him

- the bagel callback lol

- GameStore instead of GameStop lol Patton

- FROGGER

- “he eats fly for breakfast”

- We’re ten minutes in and there’s already so much going on

- Also I just want to appreciate that thomas is such a good actor I can tell which side is speaking just from their voice like the cadence is different and they way they say words ahhh it’s something I’ve thought about before but it’s really hitting me with these voice over segments

- Leslie Odom Jr lol if only we’d known

- The Pokemon battle format is so good and I love that it’s being used for a “do you give money to a homeless actor”

- The hotdog puns....

- Logan’s Lowdown!!!

- Roman mouthing “behoove” to Patton is very cute but I feel bad for Logan :(

- Pixel Logan is adorable

- The fact that roman immediately goes “ignorant” breaks my heart listen to logan!!! please!!!!

- Patton trying to soften his thoughts is kind of painful to watch

- “As long as that’s not the main reason you’re doing it!” Patton no,,,,,,,,

- Roman needs to be listened to more he looks so defeated when Patton doesn’t agree with him and only continues after serious prompting I feel like he’s been ignored too many times lately I’m very excited for a roman arc :((

- “Leslie Odom Jr’s....literal cake that he baked!!!”

- Logan’s fun fact popping up in the mario scene!! that’s my boy!!!

- Also the fact that roman is immediately painting deceit as the bad guy after they spent all of svs getting along......like, I feel like after the other sides decided that deceit wasn’t at all genuine or looking out for thomas’ best interests roman did a full 180* on him which makes sense for romans character but is also kinda depressing bc in is lying okay? and svs he was like “oh he’s not that bad!!” And now he’s like “scute bellied tyrant!!” damn

- Patton let’s him talk and then immediately is like “uuuuh no” yikes

- Roman targets all his insults at deceit and very carefully avoids being even playfully rude to anyone else hmm I really do think he’s trying to “make up” for siding with deceit last time and in the end it doesn’t even matter :((( bc he still feels like he’s disappointing people

- Roman seems like he’s genuinely trying to understand and Patton is really struggling to articulate his thoughts and that creates such a good conflict between the two bc it’s not like theyre really against each other it’s just solid interpersonal difference. or intrapersonal I guess

- The trolley problem!!!! A classic I love it

- The way it’s animated too is so good... the “Thomas is full of dread” the way the music cuts when the train appears how it cuts right before the train hits “is it over” ahhhhhh

- Also Leslie Odom Jr again lol

- “Maybe don’t depict scenarios where my friends die” and then later Patton is specifically like “it’s lee and mary lee!!!” lol wild

- “You know we don’t like to use the T word!!!” GREAT little aside

- “So it’s the how that matters” “yeah... and the why!!!” patton baby you’re trying so hard and I love you but it’s okay. you don’t need to have all the answers. you can just not know! I promise it’s alright!

- Thomas face after Patton brings up the “figment of your imagination” things KILLS ME

- I actually disagree with Thomas on the “putting more good into the world” as not being a compelling answer BUT I think that Patton is overlooking how feeling good/having positive emotions attached with those actions IS directly putting more good into the world. like, if doing good makes you feel good, that’s a good thing!! idk

- Logan disagreeing with Patton was good and we all know logan is my favourite but I think he could’ve handled that a little better

- PATTON HITTING SKIP ALL..... sweetie no :((

- everyone has already said this but that cane is the snake boy

- Roman even pulls back the insults on a philosopher who is not there

- Also Roman being like “your desires are getting in the way” again bc he feels like he’s not being listened to or appreciated bc there’s something about him that’s “wrong” and trying to shoulder the blame bc he feels bad that his desires (success, fame, love, appreciation) are inherently selfish :(((

- “that is the stupidest thing you’ve ever said” right sentiment, terrible delivery

- the way roman says “you’re just blowing smoke” is a Lot and very much like his fishing for validation but I don’t blame him for it, after what he’s just admitted it’s truly understandable that he needs that validation

- Thomas’ point about feelings motivating him is REALLY good bc we are all motivated by our emotions

- “Doing nothing is even worse!” i mean you’re not wrong but not in the way you think,,

- Logan/Deceit (I do think it’s deceit at this point) using the oxygen mask metaphor is really great to me!!! I love that metaphor & I was going to be a flight attendant so it’s something I thought about a lot. I’ll talk about it more when Deceit brings it up again lol

- “Uuuh I do need help” mood thomas mood

- “Temporarily put himself first” oof

- “It’s easy to say what we would hypothetically do...” hard agree

- Watching logan/deceit huff and roll his eyes solidifies for me that it is deceit like something about it feels unlike Logan lol I can’t explain why

- Roman nodding along with the explanation of why leisure is important makes me very happy

- “Oh is it not? Please correct me if I’m wrong” and the way the sprite pressing further and further and being more expressive with his hands and eyebrows like damn. that’s deceit!!

- Patton’s breakdown is Iconic I love the glitching and the way it zooms out to show the layout of the living room and the way he explodes ahhhhhhh so good

- why does the frog have abs that’s my one question

- lilypadton ahdhajfka I love it

- DECEIT EX MACINA THE REVEAL IS SO GOOD as soon as he started punning (cut through this bull...frog) I was like 👀 AND THEN THE LINES AND THE CAPE AND THE LORD OF THE LIES IM HAPOY TO OBLIGE

- “CODE YELLOW”

- the deceit sprite is so cute :))))

- Deceit pulling Thomas behind him we have to stan

- “Richer than Jeff Bozos” I LOVE that roman I love you

- Deceit calling him out and the way the words themselves turn into attacks is such a fun detail

- Frog Patton still punning even in serious moments is so on brand

- Deceit dodging while thomas gets hit is a solid metaphor

- “The plane is going down, you need to give thomas some room to breathe” oof like it needed to be said but oof

- The health bars changing to “Thomas’ mental health” OOF LADS WE’RE REALLY IN IT NOW

- the way thomas looks when he steps back into frame cracks me up

- “We can still beat him! We’ve beaten him before!” oh roman, but it’s not a fight against deceit :((

- the snakes on the plane ref lmao “I’m sick of this morality fighting snake on this metaphorical plane” whoever wrote that line... I want to give them a high five truly iconic

- Deceit is so much more playful and showing more diverse personality in this ep and I’m living for it

- final fantasy!! the og version turn by turn which is what I like to play lol also the villain they’re fighting kinda looks like Virgil and idk how to feel about that

- Deceit looking away as soon as logan pops up lmaoooooo

- “Not that any of you care...” logan baby no!!!!! I care!!!!

- Effective Altruism explanation and Logan making a point to go “it employs the heart and the mind” like ... reminding Patton that they need to work together and they’re on the same side I’m soft

- Deceit and Logan agreeing warms my heart they’re both so good and ahhhh

- “Emphasis on the ‘sometimes’ though, right?” “Yeah sure whatever — I mean yes! Of course!”

- I also love how deceit addresses thomas directly they don’t do that a lot but it makes sense cause deceit is really trying to persevere thomas’ self

- Him calling roman noble and roman not believing it :((( deceit trying to be honest and ahhhhh I’m so sad

- “Selflessness isn’t always the answer” which was exactly what svs was supposed to be about

- “What do you almost all things?” “Oh you’re right we wouldn’t want to plant too many trees, imagine how much CO2 might absorbed”

- lmao why am I so impressed by Roman’s deceit impression when they’re literally the same person

- roman flipping out and attacking deceit is a Big Yikes but it’s totally in character bc roman has always been black and white even more so than Patton and it’s been building to an arc for a loooong time so I’m very excited

- Deceit taking off his glove.... saying his name......... I can’t process this

- JANUS!!!!!!!!!! It’s so good it’s perfect I love it I love him

- roman immediately laughing yikesssss

- “Oh roman thank god you don’t have a moustache otherwise between you and remus I wouldn’t know who the evil twin is” YIKESSS but also valid deceit is at a breaking point

- “I thought I was your hero” “you are!”

- I’m going to be thinking about deceit’s—JANUS’S—nod for a long time....was he agreeing with Thomas or was he saying that Thomas was lying ahhhhhhh

- “Everything’s going to be okay. We love you.” “...right” AH MY HEART

- I want to give roman a hug

- Patton asking Janus for advice like right away and Janus not being great at first but coming around quickly with the ever true “it depends” like I love the two of them together the DYNAMIC POTENTIAL

- Janus does seem fond of Patton which is cute I can’t wait for everyone to be friends again lol

- ACTUAL LESLIE ODOM JR I CANNOT

- how did they make that happen,,,, how wild

- the clapping

- “This sanders sides not odom sides,, I’m not threatened at all” that is, somehow, a mood

- “don’t kill, don’t steal, easy conclusions to come to” “even those can get iffy” “I don’t want to think about that... but maybe that proves my point!” you what we call that? growth

- “Giving too simple answers to complicated questions can do more harm than good” “mmhmm”

- “So I’m sorry! Again!” Poor boy is trying to hard and I love him :((( so much <3333

- “Oh yeah that’s cool, talk about me like I’m not here” I love you Janus!!!”

- “I’ll take care of him” and then immediately joking around and trying to make thomas laugh is very cute thomas needed something lighthearted after all of that ahhh

- “You’re not stuck with an EVIL snake boy...you’re just stuck with a snake boy!!” I LOVE YOU JANUS what an adorable nerd I would die for him

- and how excited he gets about being called right he deserves it

- “I love how much you like these constant dilemmas so please keep overthinking things” you know what I needed to hear that man

- “You can’t get doing good down to a science” WORD

- the message of treating yourself well & finding the right balance between that and doing good for others being a personal thing is very good and much needed

- Lee and Mary Lee are onscreen for like 3 minutes and I love them so much

- “So this is what you do for a living? Comedy?” “Yeah I’m a hack”

- Patton and Janus chilling on the same screen... I adore them

- “Seems like things worked out after all... I was wrong about everything!” “You and I both know that’s not true” and Patton’s soft little smile I love them!!!!

- “Odom sides would cool!” like actual Leslie Odom Jr said that.... I’m shook

- okay that’s the end it’s just as much a rollercoaster the second time around no I am not okay, thank you for your time

[brothersinablackcar]

Welcome 11 Wincestmas

Tomorrow will be our day 12, but for now, here is the stunning conclusion to Days 9 and 10. As a warning, there is an “on screen” death (minor character), and violence. I hope you enjoy it though. Not the death and violence, necessarily, but the story’s conclusion.  

Sam wastes an eternity of seconds calculating where Dean must be, when it’s safe to follow. This time of night, not a lot of people are heading their way, if he jumps the gun, Dean will hear his footsteps and deviate. The thought of Dean leading him on a snipe hunt, then never letting him live it down, once again bubbles up in his mind. Sam knows Dean’s caught him watching on hunts, suspects Dean saw him the last time he tried to follow. With any luck, Dean thinks Sam snuck out for his own reasons, and hasn’t raised his guard since.

The bedside alarm clock goes off, radio blasting, tearing Sam from his counting. They argued whether it was broken, until both failed at trying to change the alarm setting. Who needed an alarm so late, Sam wondered. Dracula about to go on the prowl for his next meal, Dean teased. Sam rolled his eyes, but thought, or you. It takes several slaps to quiet the machine, leaving Sam flustered, uncertain how far behind he’ll be. Even still, he doesn’t slam the door behind him, doesn’t sprint to the end of the block, doesn’t draw attention to himself. Dean’ll take time retracing his steps, but Sam doesn’t care if someone’s following him, as long as they don’t delay him.

Dean’s definitely in the underground by the time Sam slips into his hiding spot, perfectly angled to watch for his brother’s exit. More minutes slip by; the calm that stole over him during his walk begins to fail. It never occurs to him Dean could’ve changed one of the million tiny details Sam envisioned he does, putting him ahead or behind schedule. It doesn’t occur to him, Dean didn’t bother with the pretense, that he walked directly towards the bars that don’t card, already sidled up to one ordering something light just to calm his nerves all the while bouncing his right foot.

Sam tugs his shirt, billowing air to cool down. Subway passengers discharge from below, bats escaping their cave. His training won’t let him ignore the group. His brain grabs details of the people in the crowd while his eyes scan for his brother. A man walks with a limp, but smoothly, not a new injury. A woman white knuckles her purse, anxiety – social, society? Sam curses under his breath, details matter, but all he wants is to see a boy with smiling eyes and killer intent. Two more groups emerge before he can’t stay where he is anymore. Sam heads to the closest entrance, pays a fare, but doesn’t get on a train. He checks each platform with an easy step that doesn’t match the increasing rhythm of his heart. There’s no sign of Dean as he completes the loop, exiting from the entrance he’d been watching.

If he were brighter, he thinks, he’d take this as a sign to turn back. Instead, he continues along the route he’s learned well in the short time they’ve been in this location. His thoughts turn inward, berating himself for missed opportunities spreading beyond today’s, but his senses stay alert. He passes a man throwing up, a couple making out, a group exiting one bar to walk one door down and enter another, a glass bottle rolling with enough force from the shadow of an alley to crack when it hits a brick corner. Sam halts staring for a long moment at the bottle before seeing it. There’s nothing special about the bottle, a careless employee tossing a bag of trash could’ve sent one rolling that quick. A couple trying to figure out how to have a quickie against a wall while drunk could’ve. A heated exchange escalating. All of them could, none of them did. Sam stares at the bottle, and knows. He’s not sure how he knows, he’s not a psychic, hasn’t decided if he even believes in psychics despite his family’s line of work, but he knows when he steps into the dark, he’ll find what he’s been looking for. He steps into the alley.

The stench from the row of dumpsters overwhelms in the heat. Bags of garbage line the bottom, some torn. Sam passes them, and the door he can hear music thumping behind. The bar’s located in a small building surrounded on all sides by larger ones. It’s managed to remain wholly separate, leaving a narrow gap between it and the building behind, a secret tunnel of sorts. It’s there Sam finds them.

He finds them in time to watch Dean slam her against the wall by her neck. Though her blonde waves hide his fingers, Sam can hear her choking, the change to the gargles when Dean adjusts his grip. Dean’s wearing Dad’s leather jacket, he marvels that no one questioned why such a heavy coat in July, doesn’t realize he didn’t notice Dean had it on until this moment when he’s watching the woman Dean’s strangling attempting to break his grip, beating at his wrists and forearms. There won’t be any scratches, but his brother will have bruises.

 A horrifically comical pop sounds loud of the hushed struggle, the woman’s mouth fishes. Sam isn’t at the right angle to read lips, but she’s pleading, or trying to. Her flays grow weak then Dean let’s go. The suck of air is a wheeze that makes Sam’s stomach sink. Clearly she hasn’t had to endure the same training they have for there’s relief in the way she relaxes, doesn’t realize her windpipe’s crushed, and she’ll suffocate slowly, muscles burning through oxygen faster than she can supply, increasing panic only making it worse. Doesn’t understand it’s a mercy when Dean plunges the blade under her ribs up into her heart. Her paling hands beat on Dean as he controls her sink to the pavement.

Sam whimpers.

Dean rips the knife from the woman’s body, and whips around, ready for a fight. His mask crumples when he sees his brother, as pale as the corpse at his feet.

“Sammy?” Dean crosses the distance in a beat. “What? How? Why?” Dean’s as incoherent as Sam feels.

Sam, wanting to scream, instead lets Dean yank him into the narrow way by his shirt.

“Sammy. Sammy. Hey!” Dean shakes Sam, “It’s not. No. See. She’s a werewolf!”

“Werewolf?” The word is nonsense to Sam at the moment.

“Yeah! See? That’s why the silver blade, right?” Dean holds the knife up for Sam’s inspection. It is the same silver one Dean’s favoured for as long as Sam can recall, coated thinly in black blood. So little blood got on the blade, not even enough to drip onto Dean’s white knuckles.

“A werewolf.” Sam lets it sink in. He doesn’t know which of them needs to believe the lie more, but he does know Dean doesn’t realize why Sam’s willing to accept it. For longer than he can blame on shock, Sam stood by and watched. He let his brother kill the girl with wavy blonde hair, and a vaguely familiar button nose. He wanted to be beside his brother, to be the one instead of his brother. To crush her against the wall with one hand, and slice open her guts with the other. If that’s what they did, if that’s who they are, then they have to be bad people, but that’s not the narrative they’ve been fed, nourished on more often than food. If that narrative crumbles so too does all the rest of Sam’s world. Everything turns to ash, even Dean.

“Okay?” Dean tries to keep Sam from looking too hard at the body.

“Okay.” Sam agrees, meeting Dean’s eyes, willing his brother to lead him away from where evidence can prove otherwise, because if she’s a werewolf, then all the other scratches and bruises Dean came home with were from monster too, and that’s who they are, that’s what they do. Saving People. Hunting Things. The Family Business.

**********

AHHHHHHH, UR MAH GURRRRD. This? This stuff right here? STAB IT DIRECTLY INTO MY HEART LIKE ADRENALINE, OKAY? I looooove this so much. Dean, a serial killer, unwell on so many levels. Sam, who knows it ... and yet. Here they are. Inextricably entwined. As it should be. THANK YOU, YOU AMAZING CREATURE. This was delicious!

[marsmad]

Hot Tub

Thought I'd give this writing thing a little go so I put something together just for fun. I hope you like it. Warning: smut

It was late evening, you had poured yourself a well earned glass of champagne and stepped into the warmth of the bubbling water.

As you laid back you could feel the tension slowly melt away. You took a sip of the delicious champagne, laid your head back and closed your eyes with a small sigh.

A few moments passed, then you heard a familiar voice "Hey who said you could start without me?"

"You're late" you reply without opening your eyes, "as usual!" You take another sip of champagne.

Jared chuckles, "Baby, I did say I'd be home soon"

"And we all know what you're 'soon' means!" still with the eyes closed.

He laughs again, "Yeah, you got me on that one"

You sense him stepping into the water and open your eyes. As he lowers himself in wearing nothing but his jockey's, you drink in the delicious sight in front of you. That perfectly toned chest, sexy little back curve, cute little butt and let's not even get started on the handsome face and piercing blue eyes! You're annoyance immediately melts away.

"Now she opens her eyes! Get your ass over here!"

Jared slides his arm around your waist and pulls you between his legs.

You lay back against his chest, your head resting on his shoulder. He slowly begins to trail small gentle kisses down your neck and then back up to your ear where he whispers in his low sexy voice "I've been waiting for this moment all day"

Jared glides his hands along the front of your thighs and then up towards your bare breasts, making you moan with desire. Your nipples begin to harden as he slides his hands over them and squeezes them with just the right amount of pressure.

"I approve of your lack of underwear" he says.

You reach one arm up and scratch your fingers along his bearded jawline, you then turn your head towards him, your lips brushing together slightly before you pull him into a kiss which sets your body on fire. Tongues passionately entwined, you cannot get enough of each other.

As you both reluctantly pull away from the kiss, you whisper, "I'm already beginning to forgive your lateness"

"Only beginning? Baby, by the time I'm finished with you, you won't even remember your own name let alone the fact that I was late" he growls, which sends a spark straight to your core.

He hooks his legs over the top of yours and pulls them apart, holding them firmly in place. He gives your breasts another squeeze before sliding his hands down your body until he reaches the top of your panties.

He trails his fingers along the waistband, "These really must go" and with that rips them away leaving you fully exposed. You watch them drift across the tub.

"Jared! I really did like those ones"

"Don't worry I'll buy you some more, one of every colour if you like" he pauses "And destroy them all in the same way!"

"You're a beast Leto"

"And you can't get enough of me" he replies.

His hands skim your hips, your inner thigh and every other part of your body except for where you want him to touch you. This together with the bubbles gently dancing across your skin is driving you crazy. He knows exactly what he's doing. He is the master of tease.

"Jared please" you moan

"Please what?" he counters

"Please Sir"

"You don't know how much I love to hear those words coming from your mouth"

"I think I have a good idea" you respond as you feel his growing erection pushing against you.

You reach around, put one hand between the both of you and squeeze his hard thick length. You both moan in unison.

"You can help me out with that later but right now it's all about you baby"

You remove your hand and place it on his thigh, his fingers move toward your center as you tremble in anticipation. He slides his fingers through your folds exploring every inch of you. You gasp and moan, fuck he nows his way around your body.

"You know I always take good care of my Queen right?" he questions

"Y-y-yes Sir" you moan

"Does that feel good?"

You don't respond, you can barely think straight as his fingers slowly circle your clit.

"I'm waiting" he growls

"I, I, I, yes oh yes Sir so fucking good!"

You just know he's grinning at your response, "Now there's my dirty girl" he bites into your shoulder "Ahhhhhhh" you gasp as he gently licks the bitten area.

His fingers slide further down and he gently pushes two of them into your aching centre, you moan louder this time "Jared!" your voice is breathy and slightly broken. He begins to move them, slowly at first but then picks up a speed that your body responds to immediately.

"Fuck! You feel so good" he whispers, his fingers pumping in and out of you.

Like the expert that he is, he starts to circle your clit again, this time with his thumb. He manipulates the tiny bundle of nerves with the utmost precision. You dig your nails into his thighs, your heart pounding, your legs shaking, your entire body feels like it's about to explode.

You can feel his breath, hot and heavy on your neck. His heart beating as fast as yours. He knows you're close, you arch your back slightly, your walls begin to tighten.

"Jared, I, I, I please" you stutter

Then he says the words that always tip you over the edge "Cum for me baby"

It's like a switch has been thrown, you scream his name, "JARED!!!!" as your orgasm hits you hard. Your body convulses, his fingers are relentless, you want to close your legs but he holds you firmly in place.

You're panting and moaning, the ecstasy you're feeling is incomparable. Jared groans loudly, pleased with the effect he is having on you You're sure you're about to pass out but he slows his strokes and gently brings you down from the amazing high he has just created.

"I love the way your body responds to my touch" he says, his voice dripping in lust.

He kisses your shoulder, removes his fingers from you sensitive spot and releases your legs. Your satisfied sigh is all he needs to hear.

You roll onto your front, Jared grabs your ass to pull you closer. You slide your fingers up into his hair bringing your lips to his in another firey kiss.

You eventually both break from the kiss, "As I said, I always take good care of my Queen"

"You're just way too good to me babe" you reply "And now it's time for me to take extra special care of my beautiful King"

@iraniq @nikkitasevoli

[the-13th-battalion]

Highlights from Hamilton!

The rush I got hearing the opening notes mmmm

Hamilton was Very Smol and Burr was Very Tol. It was gr e a t. Made their dynamic 10000x better.

John Laurens

"And Peggy!" She was so exasperated it was hilarious

Hamilton trying his best to get to Samuel Seabury and Burr attempting to hold this tiny ball of fury back. And then Hamilton finally got close and CLIMBED UP on the box with Sam and honestly their whole interaction was GREAT. I honestly thought Burr was going to lift Hamilton off the box. I was kind of disappointed he didn't.

King George hadn't even started singing yet- he was BARELY on stage - and people were already laughing. Myself included.

The entirety of Satisfied GOSH how did they do that so well ALSO Angelica is a queen

Lafayette

Wait For It gave me chills

GEEEEOOOORRRGE W A SH I N GTON

EVERYONE ATTACK!!!!! RETREeeEeEEaaaAAat!!!!! A TT A CK !!! RETREEEAAAT !!!!!!! wHAT are YoU dOinG lEe gEt BAcK On YOur FEeT!!! bUt tHeRE's sO MAnY oF THem!! i'M SORRY is tHiS NOt yOUR spEED???!!???!!!!

Ten Duel Commandments was Very Good. It's one of my favorites so I was happy to see it come to life!

CALL ME SON ONE MORE TIME

Did I mention I love Laurens and Lafayette??

EvErYONE gIVE it UP FOr AMErIcA’s FaVORitE FIGhtiNG FRENCHMAAANNN

LA FAY ETTE

Honestly everything from Guns and Ships to Non-Stop was a m a z i n g. So intense. Kind of sad. Sometimes adorable. It was all wonderful.

Hamilton learning about Laurens’ death was?? so sad??? My heart

I cried a little during Dear Theodosia, not gonna lie. Mostly because I love the end bit ahhhh

What’d I Miss was as perfect as I was expecting.

Honestly Jefferson deserves his own bullet point here.

Jefferson

I like him better than Daveed Diggs

Every single Cabinet Battle was hilarious and very well done.

Eliza beat boxing while Philip sings his poem omigosh

I...wanna be....in the roooommm where it happens..

Ok seriously though Burr during The Room Where It Happens was BRILLIANT. His vocals gave me serious chills.

SAME WITH WASHINGTON IN ONE LAST TIME. Golly they can SING!!

There are so many things I love in Act 2 WHAT

*Burr slips out of a dark corner* ...It must be nice..it must be niiice...to have Washington on your side. *is friends with Jefferson in .2 seconds and harmonizing with him*

Hurricane was chilling and beautiful

NEVER GONNA BE PRESIDENT NOW *everyone is climbing on furniture and dancing, Jefferson starts throwing Reynolds Pamphlets everywhere, King George emerges and dances with everyone and NO ONE CARES*

The way Eliza sang I hope that you b u rn

What do you mean Philip dies what kind of sick au is that ahahaha ahah ha haha ahhhhhhh

Hamilton reaching to comfort Eliza and her immediately ripping her hand away and holding it still in the air yes you know what part I’m talking about

At the end of It’s Quiet Uptown, when Eliza takes Hamilton’s hand, and while everyone is singing “forgiveness” and so on, Hamilton looks at her and you can see him talking and she looks ahead still but you can just tell she’s listening and understanding and sdskdksdksdksdks

Everything literally everything in World Was Wide Enough and Who Lives, Who Dies, Who Tells Your Story was BEAUTIFUL

Ok that was a lot longer than I thought it would be! This is what I can think of now... I'll add another highlight if I think of it. In summary, Hamilton was super fun!

[the-pen-and-the-stethoscope]

my official, uninterrupted, unapologetic thoughts on the album Lover by Taylor Swift as i listen in its entirety at 6:30 am on Friday morning after working until 10 pm the night before.

Before I start I am already emotional. my hands are sweating. my heart is pounding. are those tears in my eyes or am i exhausted? idk. ok here we go...

1) fuck yes. snaps. love a song with snaps. A BEAUTIFUL BREAKUP SONG ABOUT HOW YOU JUST DONT EFING CARE ANYMORE. ahhh i love how there is like this build up and you think it’s going to be a headbanger of a chorus but then it just stops and it’s like...oh wait actually this is v calm right now i just dont care about you anymore. but also OMG SHE JUST LAUGHED ummm also I love how upbeat this is. i guess what im saying is that WANEGBT walked so I Forgot That You Existed could run. 

2) MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE. this song will always bring me back to being on an airplane flying to Peru because it is literally the only song I listened for my entire trip to Peru last spring. but also from the moment it came out I was obsessed with the unapologetic happiness in the song and it’s all about YOURSELF. WAIT WTF WHERE’S THE SPELLING LINE THATS MY FAVORITE TO YELL????? TAYLOR WHERE IS IT??? WHERE IS IT??? i’ll be taking this up with my lawyers. your people will hear from my people. 

3) well i just went back to my spotify and REALIZED THAT IT WAS ON FUCKING SHUFFLE FUCK ME. OK WE ARE STARTING AGAIN. 

1) SECOND LISTEN THOUGHTS ON IFTYE: this song is just the perfect beat. i just realized that she laughs TWICE actually (maybe more??) and this is my official petition that she laughs during all live performances. thanks. 

2) OMG REP VIBES WITH THAT LOW BASE SYNTH. oh wow I love this transition much more than the one to ME! I’m glad that was on shuffle the first time. This literally could be a REP song. GETAWAY CAR THAT’S WHAT IT REMINDS ME OF! OH. MY. GOD. WELL THANKS FOR PUTTING A REP SONG ON LOVER OK IM NOT OK. did she just say “loving you aint the worst thing...you are the worst!”? Idk I will evaluate the lyrics a second (third...fourth...fifth...) time. 

3) AHHHH LOVER OMG OK LET ME JUST STARE AT MY CEILING FOR THIS ONE. “Swear to take this magnetic force of a man” is up there on favorite tswift lines. cant decide if i want this to my first dance song at my wedding OR the song that plays near the end of the reception when everyone is tired and like all the couples come up and dance and so then it’s like you get to see how many people are in love OR the song that i save for afterwards when we are alone in our hotel room. good to know i’ve got options. 

4) god damn HERE WE GO WITH SOME REP VIBES. (to clarify any deep base pulsating beat is rep vibes to me apparently) lyrics: “they’d say I played the field before I found someone to commit to” “every conquest I had made would make me more of a boss to you” “they wouldn’t shake their heads and question how much of this I deserve” “I’D BE JUST LIKE LEO” GOD THIS IS AMAZING I’M OBSESSED. “If I was a man I’d be THE MAN” 

5) OMG THE ARCHER. WAS LISTENING TO THIS LAST NIGHT AND THINKING LIKE....THIS MIGHT BE FAVORITE ONE????? I KNOW SO SO EARLY BUT SO FAR IT HOLDS UP IT’S JUST LIKE....THAT SLOW BUILD I LOVE IT. EVERY TIME I LISTEN THERE IS A DIFFERENT MEANING. AMAZING SONG TO RUN TO LIKE ON REPEAT. WHICH IS HARD TO FIND. PROBABLY HARDER TO MAKE. I STAN. 

6) THERE YA GO MISS SWIFT WITH THE SNAPS AGAIN. ohhh hmmmm someone’s horneyyyyy this song feels like a whisper...like you’re at a bar and you are like pointing out this hot guy you’ve been seeing around and you whisper to your friend ‘that’s the one’. OMG BRIDGE. WAIT WHAT OMG WAIT OMG WHAT BRIDGE BRIDGE BRIDGEEEEEE. well okay I kinda feel like a huge wind just knocked me off my feet. i’m slightly stunned. no time to process before...

7) OMG TALK ABOUT REP VIBES. This could be a beautiful music video. This is like -- i have a lot of feelings none of them have words but this song has a BLACK vibe and a DARK vibe and i’m picturing a high school shrouded in clouds at night. running through the hallways in a ripped dress. Wow wow wow. 

8) oh good some happy songs again. ahhhhhhhhh now THIS I CAN DANCE TO. AHHHHHHHHHHH I’M IN LOOVE. this is so freaking romantic. OH ANOTHER BRIDGE FROM BRIDGE CITY. Taylor like you brought it with these bridges girl. OMG THE SLOW FADE AWAY AT THE END...SOBBING.....

9) THE BEST PART ABOUT THIS IS I’M ONLY HALFWAY DONE. Oh wow is this song going to make me cry? just obsessed with how etherial this is. wow omg this is like the most complex love story ever written in a song ever. so many twists and turns i’m just sitting here asking questions!!! What happened on cornelia street that you dont want it again? why did you pack your bags? OH YAY HE GOT YOU TO COME BACK. OMG DOES EVERYONE HEAR THAT THUNDER EFFECT IN THE BACKGROUND???? omg wait omg that last line!? I will be listening to this A LOT.

10) I feel like taylor’s got a lot of happy sounding songs that are breakup songs and a lot of sad sounding songs that are actually about being in love on this album it’s so interesting!!! like this is a breakup song and wow everything about it is upbeat and pop-y. “trying to find a part of me you didn’t take up” (I FEEL THIS SO HARD WOW). love the boarded up house metaphors and like just everything else i CANT THINK FAST ENOUGH god idk why I committed to writing all my thoughts....

11) OMG SOMEONE WAS TALKING. ahhhhh she loves all these American things but she LOVES A LONDON BOY. “I GUESS ALL THE RUMORS ARE TRUE” power move!!!!! ASLDJALKDFLKJAGL;KADSLASDFLKASDFLKJ AS SOMEONE WHO LIVED IN AND FELL IN LOVE WITH THE CITY OF LONDON I’M JUST LOVING THAT THIS IS BASICALLY A LOVE SONG TO LONDON. FORGET THE BOY. ALL THESE LONDON REFERENCES ARE KILLING ME. (did she just name drop stella mccartney???? I HEARD THAT OKAY!?) 

12) DIXIE CHICKS. IT’S A COUNTRY SONG I CAN ALREADY TELL. THE STRUMMING GUITAR. I’M DYING. wait is this about her mom???? ok well i’m crying.........wow so so so so so beautiful and soft and hopeful. 

13) FIDDLEEEEEEEE oh short lived but omg that was exciting for a moment i thought we were gunna get a crazy country song. This is a good transition....the way this song starts soft and slow and doesn’t come in swinging feels appropriate after Soon You’ll Get Better. WOW. “Religion is your lips....the alter is my hips....” SEX. I’m glad this is not a country song. wow my head was in an odd place that will be weird to come back to after knowing what this song actually is about (it’s about sex)

14) YAS YOU NEED TO CALM DOWN. (it’s 7:40 am but we could have had greatnesssss) THIS SONG SERIOUSLY SLAPS. GOD I LOVE IT SO MUCH. also true story - for like the first week after it came out I SWEAR I thought there was a lyric at some point that said “you’re freaking me out” and like I still think that one of the lyrics SHOULD be that so like I know I’m not a seven time Grammy award winging singer/song writer but like taylor can we change that? can we? MY ONLY COMPLAINT ABOUT THIS SONG IS THAT IT NEEDS TO BE AT LEAST FIVE MINUTES LONGER. 

15) ahhhhhhh omg shes like learning about holding onto love and not picking fights and growing through difficulty and not blowing up. (I’ve run out of ways to say omg this is amazing and i’m obsessed). but this is like a GREAT ballad. 

16) BACK TO MEEEEEEEE I like it a lot better here phew thank god we were on shuffle before. I wanted the DJ to play this song at my friend’s wedding back in May (OMG NO MORE SPELLING LINE AHHHH) and they like wouldn’t??? so weird. I honestly think this is a self love song but also an amazing romantic love song and I think it belongs in a wedding playlist. 

17) omg so cute...little best friend love. also i love how simple this song is. no big production. we are back to basics and child hood. AHH HORNS. I thought this song was going to be like TIWWCHNT but its just purely wholesome!!! She’s serious - it’s nice to have a friend! I agree! 

18) LAST SONG AND ITS ALMOST FIVE MIN LONG MY BODY IS READY. This is just classic classic taylor swift and an amazing way to end the album. it’s like the conclusion paragraph of an essay on how she’s happy and content and in love with not just her lover but herself. the world used to be harsh, but now it’s just daylight. (another bridge city - just fyi - for those listening at home that’s where you are now) SHE IS SO HAPPY. “Step into the daylight and let it go” OMG SHES TALKING!!!!! WHERE IS THIS FROM??? IS THIS AN INTERVIEW OR IS IT NEW OMG WAIT WASN’T EXPECTING THAT ENDING WOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOW

OKAY FRIENDS THAT WAS IT I HAVE A LOT OF FEELINGS AND NOW I NEED TO LISTEN AGAIN AND AGAIN FOREVER AND ALWAYS. THANK YOU @taylorswift (@taylornation ) FOR TRUSTING US WITH SUCH A MAGICAL JOURNEY. 

[lokiarsene]

like yesterday, here's a bullet list of my thoughts for episodes 18~21

thoughts on episode 18:

oh no, it's the beach episode.

-- i really like how they show the way the PT take care of futaba. ren patiently cleaning up her room in between hours at the florist, them playing vidya with her, or just having lunch together in montage moments is very sweet. it makes me wish the anime had much slower pacing, more slice of life-y kind of drama.

-- watching yusuke, ryuji, and futaba lose their freakin minds over good curry is VERY relatable.

-- i still don't understand why ann and makoto thought that a two piece frilly bathing suit was the way to go with futaba. a one piece that she could wear under a long wrap or a hoodie would've made so much more sense... but >male gaze

-- have i told y'all how fucking tired i am of the sexualization of the teenage girls in p5 yet, and how it is one of the several things that fuckin ruined this game for me

have i?

well here it is again

none of the previous games were as bad as this b t w and p4 had one of the dungeons be a STRIP CLUB.

-- yusuke and his lobsters are wonderful.

-- oh god i forgot COMPLETELY about the whole 'mental shutdowns' thing in this game's plot. i think because it's all so pointlessly convoluted. p3 had something similar but even there it was just people turned catatonic for weeks on end when the monthly boss-shadows drew near.

i think the reason i find this so hard to understand is because from p3 to p4 the rules of shadows didn't really change so much. p3 had the persona users go up against shadow bosses; p4 had people confront the shadows within themselves, either accepting them completely (which then turned into persona), or the shadow 'absorbed' the person and ran rampant as a monster. neither of those rules really contradict each other, but in p5 personal shadows for persona users are gone completely, and how you deal with other people's personal shadows doesn't even involve them being present to complete the merge.

mona says that persona users can't have palaces, but persona users in 4 could and DID have 'dungeons' within the shadows' worlds. these dungeons dealt specifically with what was at the core of the shadows' emergence--a deep secret and a hidden truth that caused the shadow to grow, a place that was a replica and a distortion of reality based upon that suppressed truth. so that sure sounds like a fucking palace to me.

so....................... unless there's like, multiple realities folded into our own, and persona users can only access certain ones.................. i'm just super confused.

like, i know it's because the rules change game to game, but p3 to p4 didn't have any contradictions, and p2 didn't contradict anything in p3, either. it just went from a full party of wild card users to a singular one.

-- i'm glad ann's getting a little screentime here. i was just thinking about how other characters' development was lacking after makoto and futaba got so much focus.

-- mona's so sweet to ann ;-; now that he has a human form in p5r, i hope they become really good friends. she needs a kind guy friend that'll be reliable~ plus he makes her laugh.

-- sojiro talking about the anniversary of wakaba's death is......... really interesting........ considering that screenshot of futaba sitting next to a woman with the exact same haircut as her "deceased" mother.

-- ren reassuring mona that he absolutely has to be human, that he will return to who he used to be once they figure out what's happening in the metaverse is jsut jdfklasd

AND HIS LIL ROUND OF APPLAUSE WHEN MONA TALKS ABOUT ALL THE THINGS HE'S GOING TO DO TO KEEP THE WORLD SAFE ;-;

AND THAT SHOT OF HIM SLEEPING CURLED UP ON REN'S STOMACH

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

-- listen i know mona isn't rly a cat but he's the BEST cat

thoughts on episode 19:

oh it's the hawaii episode.

-- man what the hell kinda budget do these school's got that they can just go overseas with dozens of students on a yearly basis? that's impressive.

-- ryuji: "whoa, awesome! ..... i don't really get it, but awesome!" fjdsafds okay that got a laugh outta me. good one, ryuji.

-- ren: "i'm excited, too." (said in a monotone) fjklsadsl BLESS THIS BOY

-- ren's FACE when he learns that futaba installed a spying app on his phone and can hear him/see pictures he takes is...... kind of hilarious. especially if you have the headcanon that he and akechi send dumbass snapchats to each other a lot--which i do. and which you do now, too.

-- mona's depression is ten times more sad because he's a cat okay :c why they gotta make the cat so cute

-- ren, ryuji, and ann's lil sleepover is adorable. especially since ann chastises ryuji for not knowing one of the basic rules of a sleepover: if you start talkin' about your crushes, you gotta start with your own~ thems the rules lads

-- rip principal bloatneck.

-- honestly that truck shoulda at least TRIED to stop.

-- "A LO HA." goddammit that's adorable

AND HE GIVES THE LEI NECKLACE TO MONA FJDSKFJDSKL ren you're so SWEET.

-- I TOTALLY FORGOT THAT MONA CALLS SAE "ONEE-NO-NIIJIMA" FJADSKLFJDSKL ahhhh it's so cute.

-- the PT targeting okumura, who is essentially the dave thomas with political ambitions of the persona 5 world, is far funnier now that i phrase it like that.

-- ANN, OF ALL FUCKING PEOPLE, SAYING THAT THEY PROBABLY BROUGHT THIS RECENT TROUBLE ON THEMSELVES, IS A FUCKING STUPID WRITING DECISION. I CAN'T BELIEVE SOMEONE DIDN'T LOOK AT THAT AND GO, "ANN WOULDN'T SAY THIS. ANN HAS NO REASON TO SAY IT." god. lmao PLEASe let p5r be a goddamn second draft.

-- mona's totally right that ryuji's just concerned with getting popular and his dick wet. like,,, that's why this argument only made me hate ryuji more than i already did. he gets pissy when mona points out the truth.

god he sucks lmao

I'M SORRY I'M SO SALTY YOU GUYS

LOOK I'LL SAY SOMETHING NICE: SAE AND AKECHI ARE COOL

-- i really like how guarded akechi's face looks in his conversation with sae, and how off his guard he looks when she tells him that she's not going to hold back, especially since the culprit is doing such dire, awful things. he's not exactly surprised, but he's definitely uneasy and shaken by what he hears. which makes me wonder who he’s really concerned for--himself, or for ren (and the PT by extension, but akechi only really seems to care about ren, so).

the reason i like that is because the okumura arc in p5 is really where akechi's mind starts its downward spiral. principal kobayakawa's death obviously rattled him, especially since the only reason the principal died was because shido saw him as useless and disposable, something akechi is desperate NEVER TO BE. and it's that + what happens with okumura that really kicks him over the edge.

i hope p5r will give us the chance to pull him back from it. he deserves a better chance than the game's subpar writing gave to him.

thoughts on episode 20:

-- ren wakes up in a panic because he thinks he sees mona on his bed ;___________;

-- goro snoopin' on the PT's LOUD, TOTALLY CONSPICUOUS conversation in front of okumura foods' HQ is kind of adorable if you remember he clearly loves star wars (HE HAS A LIGHT SABER), and the camera cuts to his face right as they're talking about big bang and outer space lingo.

-- oh, haru. i really wish you were the black mask. that would've been so much cooler--and an actual twist. her total hopeless panic about being a beauty thief could still be a thing (because it is actually endearing), it'd just be an act. but that's me talkin' fix-its again.

-- i really like the scene of haru defending mona to the PT on the rooftop, then cutting to show just how strained her relationship is with her father. she exists to be useful to her father's ambitions and nothing else, and that scene really drove home just how painful that is for her.

-- REN TWIRLS HIS HAIR BETWEEN TWO FINGERS WHEN HE'S DEEP IN THOUGHT. AHHHHHHH I FORGOT HE DID THAT

-- oh hey remember how the game went through the trouble of showing how haru's fiance is a sexist, violent, animal-hurting piece of shit and then promptly failed to actually separate her from him in game (i think you only can do that in her s-link?? the s-link you can barely finish in your first run of the game??), and in t hEN SHOWED HER IN THE CAR WITH HIM LATER, LOOKING HORRIBLY UNCOMFORTABLE?

god this story makes me so fucking mad lmfao STOP PUTTING GIRLS IN PHYSICALLY OR SEXUALLY VIOLENT PERIL AND NEVER ACTUALLY ENSURING THAT THEY'RE SAFE, YOU DAVID CAGE LEVEL OF HACK BULLSHIT WRITERS.

-- ryuji running into the attic, all worried about mona, with a first aid kit, is..... very good. very good and endearing. good on you, ryuji.

-- haru gently encouraging mona to tell the truth is also really good. idk if i just missed it in the game or what, but i really like how she's presented in the anime. she's like a counterpart to ren--soft, sincere, observant, patient, yet she's made of pure steel beneath all that.

thoughts on episode 21:

-- WHY WAS HARU'S GRANDFATHER GIVING COFFEE TO A FIVE YEAR OLD

-- haru, the reason your father's heart grew twisted is thanks to capitalism. you gotta change the heart of capitalism.

-- not to be all poochie here but whenever akechi isn't on screen, all i can ask myself is whERE'S AKECHI?

-- HOW CAN I TAKE THE EVIL DAVE THOMAS SERIOUSLY WHEN HE'S DRESSED LIKE FUCKIN MEGAMIND?

-- okay see this is where i'm thrown completely out of the story or even really liking haru. haru just listened to her dad's shadow saying he would PIMP HER OUT TO HER FIANCE WITHOUT A SECOND THOUGHT. and she still is just like ~no i want him to go back to being kind~

bitch are you nuts

are you NUTS

youR DAd SHOULD DIE AND YOU'D BE BETTER OFF

CONSIDERING HOW THE GAME GOES, YOU ARe BETTER OFF

god. i'm getting so mad again lmao

-- ren approaching haru to point out that if the truth of her father's crimes comes to light, she'll forever be associated with him (and with all the harm and ruined reputation that brings) is, once again, further reminder of just how... damn good ren is. he doesn't hesitate to speak from the heart nor does he ever fail to listen to someone else speak from theirs.

-- also not for nothing but uh

how did the cops not like

figure out how the PT phan-site was set up within the first few months and track it down to mishima? was that ever addressed at all?

-- honestly another reason why i get so fucking mad about this okumura stuff is the game goes SO FAR OUT OF ITS WAY to make you feel BAD that he died, when he was by all rights a fucking shitheel monster, yet when akechi dies it's like 'oh well. that sucked.' fuck off, atlus. the death of a greedy, heartless CEO isn't more sad just because his gaslit daughter is conditioned to be sad about it.

i understand that a large part of the shock after okumura's death is because the PT don't know if they did anything wrong. but okumura was in no way a good person. he was in no way a person whose redemption overruled all the hurt and harm he did. that has been the case for EVERY PT target before this, so why the fuck is okumura suddenly so different? why SHOULD he be?

the difference between him and, say, akechi is that okumura et. al. all made those choices on their own to do terrible things. they delighted in it, they enjoyed it. but akechi, much like futaba, was forced into a cycle of self-destruction--it’s just that in futaba’s case, her self-destruction targeted herself, and akechi’s was quite literally weaponized and used against others. he approached shido as a young teenager and was then used by him for years.

a teenage boy being used as a magical hitman by his shitlord father is far more deserving of sympathy and redemption than grown adults who willingly make the decision to harm, abuse, and prey on others. but no, the game didn’t want to do that.

this is another big problem i have with p5's second and third acts: it's so tonally dissonant and sloppy. it's like they didn't try to actually be as rebellious and hellraiser-y as the first act WANTED to be, and it all ends up being such a limp-dick shriveled mess of "let's fight against this rotten society!! ......... as long as it in no way actually upsets anyone or does any REAL change." fuck off lmao

that's not me even commenting on the "twist" and how it needed to be explained MULTIPLE TIMES to the player for it to make any sense.

and it still doesn't make sense to me btw.

so that's another thing i hope p5r fixes.

-- rip evil dave thomas megamind.

-- akechi floating the idea to sae that the phantom thieves had nothing to do with okmura’s death is............................ interesting.