#this is depressing but very beautiful

[blamemma]

daniel ricciardo chooses which song matches him best at the silverstone grand prix

[silusvesuius]

nnnnnnnnnnnnno maa'am

[oatmealuv]

love for love’s sake carefully, and beautifully handled mental health. they didn’t sugar coat the depression myungha and yeowoon were experiencing.

a lot of times in bl we see characters going through hardships, but by the magic of love they’re better again or everything gets fixed. external love definitely plays a huge part in healing and being able to get through hard situations more swiftly, but it’s hardly ever the sole solution.

myungha getting a bf didn’t cure him, gaining friends didn’t cure him. he had two guys wrapped around his finger, his grandma was alive yet he still has low self worth. he’s someone that has been depressed for so long, has had deeply ingrained negative beliefs about himself that have kept him from ever being truly happy. he believes that nobody could ever love him, he can’t bother anybody with his problems because he’s a burden.

this is why depressed people isolate, they believe all of the things the depression is telling them and it is incredibly difficult to change that. it can take years to change the way you percieve yourself and the world, i think the buffs were the blockages in myungha’s perception. when yeowoon said “i love you” to him, there was an error message because deep in his soul he believes that as an impossibility. his buffs were because of his attempts to getting close to yeowoon, he saw it as a danger because getting close would mean that he would burden yeowoon.

myungha’s life was so so sad, poor guy was dealt such bad cards. his mom living happily without him as if he never existed served as proof of the negative things he’s been telling himself. realizing that you’re nothing to no one, that you’re hard to love or you’re too much is such a hard pill to swallow. it might not be objectively true, but if your mind believes it, then that’s all it takes to completely break your spirit. myungha kills himself because he sees no reason for his life, his mom abandoned him, his gf broke up with him, and his grandmother is dead. his reason for life is reliant on other people it isn’t an internal reason.

now when he’s in the game, he’s faced with the choice of who he loves more, yeowoon or his grandma. i think that they decide to make him choose between them because he can’t fathom receiving love from two people at once. it’s overwhelming, and terrifying for someone that has had limited quantities of love his whole life. his love for yeowoon is the truest love he’s ever felt besides his grandmother. yeowoon and myungha are equals, share a lot of similar life experiences, yeowoon opens up his heart and is ready to be there for him unconditionally. even when myungha refuses to share what he’s feeling, when he is actively breaking his heart, he is willing to change whatever it takes just to be around him. having someone show you that unconditional love is both incredible and so scary at the same time. that person is seeing you at your most vulnerable, at your worst and still choosing you.

myungha is used to self-abandonment, it’s all he knows. he felt like choosing yeowoon would mean choosing himself, and in turn would mean he is selfish and leaving is grandmother to die. if he chose his grandmother he would stick to his usual self, but yeowoon would possibly go back to how he was in the beginning and die. to him everything seems like a huge risk because he feels the weight of the world on his shoulders. of course in the game that really was the consequence, choose one life over another. but i think this show really did a great job at showing just how impossible choices can be when you’re depressed, how warped your point of view gets. but i couldn’t help to think what would’ve happened if he had chosen himself, maybe that’s what he was supposed to do.

[skitskatdacat63]

"Sometimes you learn more things from the difficulties than from the celebrations"

[romidoes]

‘stop eating your weight in fruit loops, go get dressed!’

[ok-amnesiac]

this photoshoot makes me sad.

STEVE HARRINGTON AHH JUMPSCARE

[songthursh]

Poor man, reading philosophy never goes right

Also credits for @stupidlynx for finding damn amazing memes the best ones AAAA

[londondungeon2]

omfg it’s almost midnight here and i have to get up for work at 5 AM but let me compose at least some of my thoughts …

ok idia x robot girl! reader … hear me out 🥺

someone he creates to cure his loneliness of companionship in a tender way that ortho just cannot do; ugh i’m imagining a plain head just sitting on the desk, stripped down to the metal and skinless; him asking which eye color you like the best until it lands upon yours;

the midnight conversations as he builds a body; the pining from the reader (is it actual pining or are you just scraping the edges of desperate self perseverance so he doesn’t trash you like the other models); kind of dream-like transition between adding each body parts (like imagine yourself lying in a tub of ink — cheeks, nose, lips, a slight peel of your forehead visible — and eventually it all drains down as more and more body parts are added);

the first very touch of human flesh upon you; the cracked polystyrene blinks that you give with twitchy eyelashes; you siphon your romantic tendencies between a messy mélange of gritty 18+ hentai and victorian romance novellas; idia pours his damned and tormented soul into making you perfect for him and you pour yourself willingly into the image, designed just for one man <3

past midnight edit:

BRUH TO THIS SOnG

yeah to this fuckin banger

((past midnight edit again: there are really only two ways you can go with robot main characters: the building process or the robot being oblivious and thinking they are human (Ex Machina or Twilight Zone) i enjoy both sooo much))

[cheekblush]

took myself on a little shopping trip yesterday in the city where i used to study in hopes of lifting my spirits but by the end of the day i felt so disheartened. wandering the same streets 10 years later and not much has changed. i’m still the same lonely unlovable girl.

[mielgf]

who was gonna tell me one of the most crushing parts of adulthood is the allusion of freedom, sometimes decisions are made for you and you just have to smile through it and try to be positive while screaming inside bc you thought you were finally old enough to make choices for yourself (not in this economy i’m not!)

[blujayonthewing]

when you put aside all the ethical issues, I'd respect AI art a lot more if the people making it were actually leaning into the bizarre dreamlike output instead of breathlessly insisting that it looks SO good SO realistic and it's gonna REVOLUTIONIZE ART, BRO and trying to use it to make Normal Children's Books and Normal Marketable Advertising Art

[wawamouse]

Me? Well, I've... I've mostly been a loner.

[wavesoutbeingtossed]

which midnights song do you think is importantly to TTPD but not often in the conversation? (From your recent ask)

lol i hesitated answering this because it’s touchy but fuck it

With the caveat that I am NOT saying anything about its origin or inspiration so please don’t come after me for it because I am not platforming that conversation on main: BTTWS. The event or person that inspired it does not matter for the purposes of this answer or discussion, it’s the expression of grief that does, because grief is what drives TTPD.

The hollowed-out, desperate, all-consuming sadness of that song, the feeling of isolation and feeling alone in your pain, of wondering if there is something you could have done differently to change the timeline, is also the underpinning of TTPD.

I’ve said it several times on this blog, but no matter what inspired the song, the reason I think it’s on Midnights is because of the theme of grief and how it consumes you, and how it can leave you racked with guilt and rumination. (Tying in to all the other what-ifs on the album about sleepless nights.)

So no matter what triggers the grief, a sense of loss is what drives the decisions she makes in the stories in TTPD.

Obviously there are a lot of other songs that apply, and like I said in the post I linked earlier, all of Midnights feels like questions that TTPD answers, and all the songs figure on TTPD in some way.

[sundial-bee-scribbles]

happy late bday gakupookie

[shadovvheart]

I haven't had a single day this september where I'd feel well 🤢

[shopcat]

far be it for me to judge how people go about making fan content as a trans person but i feel like if the vast majority of not the whole of it is centred around the Trans Experience being nothing but suffering and only being able to use these lenses to deal characters fictional transphobia to face and/or dysphoria that doesn't sound like you're coping with the various complex difficulties of what being trans can be like it just sounds like you're in hell 😭 like purely talking about how ppl talk about their headcanons here bc the topic at large is way too complex for me to even try and say anything about but you so seriously cannot be like "yes i love when this character is trans" and then make their existence absolutely miserable. DURING PRIDE MONTH...