#this is for stampede specifically because of how their plants work and also

[thetismcave]

Hey y’all :)

You know how Vash can hear Plants in pain on a frequency humans can’t? Yeah? okay

Now, consider, Vash sending out his own subsonic distress signal when he’s badly hurt or in emotional pain. Unconsciously calling for help or consciously trying to self-soothe. It doesn’t really matter which, because nobody can hear it either way, can they? :))

(and the ones that can hear it are either those physically unable to do anything but listen.. or those who would take that vulnerability as weakness to exploit)

[nanomooselet]

I hunger for good dubbed anime to watch. Sell me on Trigun-make me the newest fandom convert.

A'ight. Get comfortable, this is gonna be a long one.

In its simplest sense, Trigun is a sci-fi western story that grapples with some pretty profound questions about love, principle, volition and autonomy, hope and despair, family and friends. Vash's secrets are stranger and more terrible than can be imagined in advance - I promise you, whatever spoilers you've learned don't prepare for the wrenching sorrow and horror of his life.

But it is a fundamentally kind story. And also very funny! Vash is in many ways a Looney Tunes character. He's a strange and sweet man with no attachment to his dignity and way smarter than he seems, which means he's doing it all on purpose. He might be my single favourite character to appear in any anime ever.

Trigun is set on the burning desert planet of No Man's Land, where a set of colony ships crashed a century and a half ago. The planet is almost devoid of resources, so we rely upon beings called Plants to survive - precious biological reactors that can produce power and water. They are expensive and difficult to find (the technology to make them was lost in the crash) and more of them are failing over time. Enter Meryl Stryfe (an insurance consultant in the older continuities, a reporter in the new one) set to track down Vash the Stampede, the Humanoid Typhoon, a man with the highest bounty on his head in living history: sixty billion double dollars. The crimes attributed to him are terrible. Mass murder, the destruction of cities. So Meryl's going to try and monitor him to see if the damage he causes can be reduced. And that sets her off on learning the story of Vash's life and the history of the planet he walks. Other characters include Milly Thompson (Meryl's assistant and friend, who is set to show up in Trigun Stargaze) and Nicholas D. Wolfwood, a man who quite literally bears a cross and odd secrets, but none quite so strange as those of the man he staunchly befriends.

Okay so. A lot of people started with the OG anime series, released in 1998, and find a lot of value in it, but I have to front: I did not enjoy it at all. While Vash's silliness is cute, it's also wholly unfocused, the dub extremely amateurishly written and acted, and the attitude towards women in it is fucking weird, bordering on disgusting, which I gather is because the director kept pushing the pervy comedy and the staff all hated it. That said, the soundtrack is a banger, and I like that it gave Meryl more of a position as the viewpoint character. The dub was on Youtube but... seems to have been removed, great. So I don't know where you can find it now.

Then there's the original manga. The two initial volumes were shounen, but the magazine folded before it could be complete. When Nightow revived it in another it was reclassified as seinen and renamed Trigun Maximum. I strongly recommend it in its entirety, because it's a magnificent story. A more or less definitive online fan translation is floating around, it should have everything you need.

And then there's Trigun Stampede.

I love the manga a lot, and it's obvious the people who made this show did too. It engages with its themes and plays with the expectations set up by it being an adaptation while clearly resounding with love for the story. Everyone working on this goes harder than I've ever seen anyone go on anything - music, acting, animation, cinematography, even the writing in the English dub is powerful and meticulous, with an unflinching eye to the darkness of its themes. Because Stampede specifically talks about how Vash became the man he becomes when he doesn't done it yet. And it also does something absolutely extraordinary, which is discuss the persecution of femininity even in those who are not women. This Vash is much softer, passive, gentle and nurturing, and the story is relentless in the brutality he attracts. This version of Vash's genocidal brother might be the most chilling of all, because he is realistically emotionally abusive even as it's obvious he loves and needs his twin.

Plus the fight scenes are, hands down, the greatest I've seen in animation for the last decade. There can be no debate. The final battle in the twelve episode is a thing of beauty, perfect characterisation and relentlessly ratcheting tension, spectacle that blows your eyes out the back of your skull.

It all really makes me happy. It's... man, it's hard to state how beautiful and inspiring I find the story. I really hope you love it, and I'd love to discuss it with you once you're done!

(I've written much, much more about it in this handy-dandy index, but it's riddled with spoilers, so beware.)

[lost-technology]

SEEDS Security Codes and Why They Matter

So, I've been thinking about one of the details in Trigun: Stampede that was not present in either '98 or the manga. In '98, Knives just hacking into the SEEDS codes was left as-is. He walked up to Captain Joey and shot him and apparently took his pilot's seat. Did the Captain have the navigation open at the time? Was it closed and Knives had to do some hacking? Anyway, there, he did it on his own. Now, in Trigun Maximum, which treats Vash and Knives' childhood differently (just Rem there raising them), there is a foreshadowing of what is to come. In Volume 6, Rem is depicted waking up to an emergency signal in the middle of her sleeping-hours. (Aw, she sleeps in her regular clothes, mom-jeans and all...). Panicked, she yells at Knives for him and Vash to lock themselves in their rooms and not to come out or speak up for ANY reason, even if they hear voices outside. She tries to handle the situation, but it goes from bad to worse and the automatic crew-wakening protocol goes into effect, which she is very concerned about (for reasons that we who have read the manga know about)!

In the beginning of Volume 7 the crew wakes up, there's a situation-update. The ships are going off-course and will collide if things are not corrected. They're working through the issues and suddenly, there's an unknown factor that kicks in to correct the course. Rem then gets the crew all settled back in again for nappy-time... And proceeds immediately to Vash and Knives, where she scolds Knives with (Rem's angry mom-face, my beloved)! Knives was playing around with the ship codes and systems. He'd apparently hacked his way into the system and was curious about SEEDS' functions. (One would assume that Rem changed some of the codes after this, but I bet they were in some kind of hacking-war, with her trying to stay one step above curious Plant-twins). Knives did not mean to nearly cause a catastrophe, but this shows that he can and is a foreshadowing to when he DOES mean to cause one later. Now, in Trigun Stampede, it is stated by Nai / Knives that Vash gave him the ship-codes, also that he spent a lot of time and trouble changing the codes for every human ship. (The manga lists the ship they are born on as the Mothership, presumably guiding the entire fleet, in Stampede, it is just Ship 5, which implies multiple guides with multiple navigators). I am wondering where Studio Orange is going with this. Will it be a situation like the manga where the kids are just playing around? Little prank-war with Rem? Maybe Vash is sharing a ship code innocently, as part of their games? Or is it going to be darker, more sinister? I wonder if Vash was originally of the thought of "maybe we need to crash the ships and kill all humans (except Rem) because they're scary and dangerous because of what happened to Tesla" and then had a change of heart and backed out of it? - I can see that happening... him having his cathartic alone-time with Rem as in the manga and then talking things out with Nai and thinking that they weren't going to go through with it. And then Nai betrays him. I've been wondering about the guilt Vash carries over the Big Fall in Stampede. Is it an unnecessary, undue guilt like he seems to have about a lot of things? Or is there a guilt born from "I had originally planned disaster / we had originally planned disaster" and it came true even after he'd backed out? It's just that... in both '98 and Maximum, he does carry his cross (that is not Wolfwood's), but he seems to feel less specifically guilty over this (the Big Fall). He's really more like "Knives, how could you do this to everyone / Rem?!" He just seems more guilt-ridden in Stampede than in the other media and I am wondering if there is a dark secret behind it. I can see it going either way.

[bobosbillionsknives]

i agree with a lot of your points about knives, i do also think he is aroace of some kind (demi imo), but the way he ignores bodily autonomy wasn't a theme that was new to stampede. the way he consumes other plants and forced vash to use his angel arm are examples of it, though less explicitly 'sexual'. either way, his actions weren't born out of sexual attraction, he simply thinks that all plants are an extension of himself and he can use their bodies as he pleases since its for a 'greater purpose'. he is not a predator but he isn't innocent either

Oh no no no no no no no I do NOT wanna give the impression that I am genuinely defending knives is ANY way. 😭

I completely agree with everything you're saying. He is inarguably abusive. Saying he's not would be a wild ass claim to make. 🙏 My only argument here is that it isn't specifically sexual, but I'll get more into that in a bit. 😝 I have SO MUCH to say abt this...so I'm gunna use this as an excuse to word vomit on y'all. Thank you for bringing this to me I am itching.CRAVING to talk about my favorite girls always. 🤗💖

INSANE ESSAY POSTING LETS GOO !!!

I think your point on Knives seeing the plants as an extension of himself is SPOT ON!!! He does the same thing with Vash too. He's doing it because hes so stuck up his own ass he seriously thinks there is no possible way he could ever be wrong, everyone else is just too blind or stupid to see it his way. That's why he does the whole "eternal suffering for Vash the Stampede" bit. He genuinely cannot comprehend that Vash just fundamentally disagrees with him. He thinks if Vash goes out and sees every horrible thing a human can be he'll finally give up the hippy dippy act and face this false reality Knives made up as a coping mechanism so he never has to actually face any of his problems. Cause stabbing all your problems away is waaaaay easier than actual growth or change. Top ten girls who are trapped by the horrors of their past 😂!

Knives has a blatant misunderstanding of people's worth outside of himself. He disregards the lives of others constantly, he literally murdered 20 mil+ and was genuinely confused when Vash was mad at him for it. He doesn't take anything seriously. He especially doesn’t take physical pain seriously, unless it’s happening to himself. [DID YOU ACTUALLY SHOOT ME!!?] He's said that he knows none of the crazies he sends after Vash can ever kill him. He thinks if they can't kill him, then none of the hurt Vash experiences during these fights really count. Its always a game to him. He knows Vash will be fine because he has faith in his ability to fight. (He's complimented his fighting skills several times lol.) Yet he’s consistently shocked and disgusted when he sees Vashes scars, like he didn’t play a role in that ??? He just never thought of it until it was literally staring him in the face.

HE THINKS EVERYTHINGS A DAMN GAME !!!!!

Knives never really wants to force Vash to agree with him either, he's literally waited decades for him to come around to his point. He's definitely lashed out violently before, and has disregarded his safety. But I don't think he actually even likes seeing Vash in pain 😭 (maybe a little in a Itoldyouso brother kinda way lol.) He's completely horrified when he sees his scars. This panel speaks absolute VOLUMES to me. He is angry that Vash would allow people to hurt him this much. (Bro is for sure a victim blamer 🥱 Vash OBVIOUSLY should've known humans are evil and would do this to him. 🙄 HIS FAULT !) Those scars solidify in his mind that his brother is reckless, and clearly doesn't know what's best for himself. That's why he feels the right to "save" him from humans. Knives out of anyone in the world knows how much Vash disregards his own life. He's angry that his own brother would choose the perceived violence of humanity instead of the safety he has worked SO hard to cultivate for over a hundred years. After everything they learned from their childhoods, Vash would have to be deaf and dumb to keep crawling back to them. (From his perspective anyway.)

Everything Knives does he thinks is to better Vashes life. That's what makes him such a tragic character to me. He genuinely believes he's in the right and doing everything he has to so him and his brother can feel that safety that was never guaranteed to them in childhood. He loves Vash, (PLATONICALLY !!!! 😰) He wants Vash to be happy. He just doesn't understand why, that despite everything, living alongside the humans is what makes him happy. Something he only accepts at the end of trimax when he literally trees himself to assumed death so Vash could have that. Knives is unambiguously in the wrong, but I do think his thought processes are sympathetic. WRONG. But like .I get it girl. Besides, he acts more like a toxic mother than anything. How DARE you be so ungrateful after everything I've ever done for you that you've never even asked for. ✋😒 and EXPLICITLY told me not to do. Ugh. 🙄 you don't even love me…guess im just a terrible brother than huh…🥀 BITCH SHUT UP !!!!

Now about the asexuality, not only...do I think Knives is aroace. I think he's completely sex REPULSED!!!!! Sex is a mark of human degeneracy, animals clinging for power over each other. Hed think hes above it !! It would disgust him, I don't think he's ever had a sexual thought in his life. He’s also a Jesus freak he'd think procreation in general is a sin 🙄‼️ik his interpretation of the bibles gotta be INSANE. Exploring sensuality is like a normal and healthy thing to do no fucking WAY Knives is self aware enough to do all that. If he could experience any kind of libido, his hatred of humans would never allow him to explore it anyway. Since sex is such a huge part of human culture. He probably thinks consensual sex is a myth humans made up to assault each other easier…😭

this is literally him bro I can't see him any other way...🚬 He's literally a pearl clutching mom who refuses to understand anyone else's experiences because he doesn't understand them.

I can't imagine him being able to feel romantic love either...I actually think it would be pretty out of character ngl. Plus I think it could be an interesting element of why he feels so disconnected from humanity in general. It would be part of why he feels the need to define himself as alien. Knives would rather die than admit this, (and he did) but all he's ever wanted was understanding. The same way Vash does. Knives doesn't understand sexuality/romance, or deep empathy, or most social confinements at all. That's clear by his inappropriate emotional reactions and lack of a filter. He can't feel emotions the same way Vash or Rem can. It makes it very difficult for him to relate to and connect with others. Especially Rem. He feels too wrong, too broken, too alien. But he's convinced himself that this is actually a superiority. So he can sleep at night. But he's far more human than he'll ever be willing to accept. The familial love he feels for Vash is the only thing that makes him feel normal. And it's why he clings to it so desperately. I think that feeling being explicitly familial makes the most sense for the story.

(cut for explicit talk of SA/CSA)

Im never one to dismiss bad actions from a fictional character. If I thought Knives was a sexual abuser, id say it. I even considered it before I watched/read Trigun and kept it in mind the whole time because of how prevalent of a take it is. If anything, I feel like theres more evidence for metaphorical depictions of Knives BEING sexually abused than being the sexual abuser. I mean his literal whole thing is how plants bodies are used and abused against their will. Solely for the humans gain. While it's slowly and painfully killing them. And how afraid he is that they'll do it to him too....😭 He would be absolutely HORRIFIED by SA. I just don't think it's an abuse he'd perpetuate. It goes against literally everything he stands for. I get he’s a hypocrite and all but I could just never see Knives of all people doing anything sexually ever. ESPECIALLY for his own pleasure.

Both Vash and Knives read to me as CSA victims. This would need to be a separate post all together because there is entirely just too much to say. But I feel very strongly about this interpretation and it's why I'm so firm on this. Sexual abuse is a huge theme in trigun OBVIOUSLY!! And Vash and Knives can easily represent different ways people cope with trauma like that. Knives gets angry, and bitter, and lashes out. While Vash shuts himself off, and tries to run away from it all. Two extremes from two brothers. Two sides of the same coin and all that. They've been victimized, I think it's the main reason why Knives would be so angry and distrustful of humans. Now I know Steve was kind of a throw away character from the anime- but I believe long term interpersonal abuse from a human early in life would explain a lot of the deep rooted hatred Knives has for humanity. Along with his hatred for Rem if she failed to protect them, and his deep sense of entitlement to protect Vash if Vash couldn't protect himself. (Tesla was the last straw for Knives bc at least for a while he thought he could trust Conrad till all that happened and he realized the only person he could ever trust was Vash, and that fear never really left him even 100+ years after.) (My interpretation of Conrads role is also a different post gerrrrr TOO MUCH TO SAY.)

Knives' ideology has always been inconsistent, I can easily see him disregarding autonomy in some ways but refusing to in others and never making a mental connection between the two. Plus Knives would think Vashes scars are shameful and disgusting. He probably cant even make himself look at him let alone touch him be so fr. Knives' definitely has an unhealthily attachment to Vash but not in a sexy sex or ROMANCE way 🤦‍♂️ ITS JUST HIS BPD YA’LL 😝‼️#favoriteperson #extremefearofabandonment #vashkeepsleavinghim (also another separate insane essay post) there is no argument here that Knives isn’t extremely bad at emotional regulation. Familial/platonic dynamics like that happen literally all the time it’s just not evidence of anything to me. I can't even see Knives directly punching someone let alone be capable of sexual violence against his own BROTHER ? I'd argue he's far more verbally/emotionally abusive than he ever is physically anyway. He doesn't even kill directly, it's always either done without a second thought by his powers, indirectly by starving the population out, or by making other people do it for him. He doesn't seem to actually enjoy seeing people in pain, more the satisfaction of a job well done. I don't see why this wouldn't apply to Vash too? He doesn't even usually initiate their physical fights. Vash does. (He has every right to, for the record. Knives just doesn't comprehend why Vash would be mad so he always tries to talk like everything is normal. Lol.) And when they are fighting he always puts his hand on his face ?? More annoying than a direct indication of violence. He could just punch him or something but he doesn't? Like violence in Trigun isn't a thing known to happen. Idk I think that's interesting and worth exploring a bit yk ???

Obviously he chopped his arm off I'm not saying he's innocent there either, just that he's more likely to be emotionally manipulative than explicitly interpersonally violent LOOLL. He didn't chop off his brothers arm because he enjoyed it, to him that pain is neutral. It was just a super casual reminder. But SEXUAL violence is completely different, sure it'll leave scars but you can heal from physical pain all day and night I mean commooon it barely even COUNTS as real pain. (Because he rarely has to experience it.) (A certain someone's got a major empathy problem.) And if it kills you it doesn't matter cuz you're already dead 😝!! But SA is different. It's his worst fear and greatest agony. It's something he knows sticks with you your whole life, he doesn't think that's a wound capable of being healed. (So he never tries and chooses to live in constant fear and anger instead.) That's how I see it anyway...🤕 Again it's not like he's a reasonable guy he is known to be a bit unstable idk if u knew...

Actually if anything, I think Vash would be the more interpersonally violent of the two. (Vashes abuse is always reactionary tho he would never act like that if Knives would just be normal lol he is not the aggressor here.) I can't see Knives punching Vash but I could VERY easily see Vash punching Knives ykwim ??? (For trimax anyway, ik kid Knives beats the shit out of him in 98 which I DO think is funny. But I don't accept into my personal canon okay LISTEN we are talking about a lot of conflicting characterizations here. JUST HEAR ME OUT. ✋) Knives never even really blames Vash for BLOWING HIS LEGS OFF in July too, which I always thought was so interesting. It makes me think this is actually a common thing for them to the point that they don't even argue about it outside of "are you actually aiming at me again 🙄?" Which is more bitchy than angry. Like ugh I can't believe you. Typical, typical Vash. 🥱 He'd probably use it as a way of proving to him that they are the same. And despite denying it, Vash would actually agree and feel a deep sense of shame abt it. He's had 150 years of pent up anger after all. He almost killed him with a rock once lol. I'm tired of everyone woobifying Vash as some kind of perpetual uwu victim. Vash is fucking mean sometimes. He is just as capable of violence as Knives is. The same way Knives is just as capable of great kindness. It is known that Vash is in fact physically STRONGER than Knives. (With his plant powers and id assume in general because Vash actually goes outside while Knives reads in his garden all day.) I truly believe that the only reason Knives ever wins the sibling fights is because of Vashes constant hesitance. He's not a battered wife stereotype. All Vash wants is control over his own life, the last thing he'd want to see himself as is a helpless victim. It's why he always pretends nothing is ever wrong with him. It's why he doesn't accept help, and values other people's problems far above his own. His kindness was always an active choice and that's why he's such a powerful character. And Knives would bring out the absolute worst in him LOOL all that work he's done to better himself is instantly thrown out the window the second Knives' very punchable face walks in the room.

He was fighting absolute demons not to run over and beat tf out of Knives in this panel

This is why I feel so disgusted by stampede and the way they handled their relationship. They've dumbed down these characters to the point that they are unrecognizable. Literally every aspect of stampedes portrayal of them feels like a first conclusion based on a synopsis of their goals and personalities. I get there's only one season but that's a LOT to fuck up in one season bro. 😭. There is absolutely no salvaging Nai as a character for me. I'd cover my drink around that guy I find him genuinely repulsive. At least with trimax, you can read around an initial sussy reading if you wanted. How anyone defends Nai, I don't even know. That whole plant insemination thing is pretty on the nose y'all. Literally doesn't even make sense for him to do that like? Why would he want more independent plants??? It's like they tried to make Knives' motivations make sense when the whole point should be that they don't. He's fighting ghosts out of fear. Stampede wasn't even good enough to justify its own existence by how it looks. Adding peculiar plant pregnancy preggo fetish incest bait is just the turd on the turd cake. They ruined the most compelling part of the story for me. Pfft.... But whatever...🚬 not like I care ....🚬

Not to mention Legato y'all don't even get me started. The guy that HATES humans more than anything in the world taking in a HUMAN -SEX TRAFFICKING VICTIM. The one time he's ever taken pity on a human being and it was someone who was the victim of a violent sex crime. Yeah guys that dude. Total raper. Defo a brother diddler. What the fuck are we talking about right now y'all. I genuinely feel like sexual violence would be the last thing knives would ever do ever. I understand that there are sus scenes in the manga that could be interpreted this way, but considering the many themes in Trigun and his place in the story as a whole, I think it is such a misrepresentation. And it frustrates me to see it as one of the only things talked about in regards of his character. If I could, I'd rewrite every scene in the world so people could understand what I see, but I can't. And I know I can't control how other people see the media I like. Trigun is extremely interpretive, and I understand why this is a common conclusion. But I guess I just can't shake the feeling that it's more complicated than that. I have criticisms with trimax and ESPECIALLY 98. And there's obvi a lot id change to fit what I'd find most interesting. (Also why every headcanon revolves around Knives somehow teehee) BUUUUUT I do think all of my analysis is pretty based in canon. I can't stress how insane I am about this and how much I've thought about it 🤕🤕🤕🤕🤕. Believe me, I've considered every obstacle. And I've stayed consistent.

Knives is a raper feels like the easy answer to me. To be completely blunt, it's just not as compelling. Vash and Knives would both have very complicated relationships with their bodies and sensualities and gender and their relation to their plantself and their humanself and blah blah blah whatever. I'd much rather explore that as a separate result of the same abuse than default to supercestsimulator69. Knives is already an abuser. Making him a sexual aggressor too doesn't really add anything to the story besides diminish and dumb down his very complex motivations. Vash and Knives should be very good friends who know each other better than anyone. (They are trauma bonded like CRAAAZZY, very codependent like y'all get it.) I think that would make their conflict SO much more interesting. While providing some great context to why Vash is so willing to give every horrible person he meets a second chance at life. If I saw my brother, who I love, and is my best friend in the whole wide world, slowly deteriorate under the pressure of the abuse we we're BOTH experiencing; go fucking crazy and kill everyone. And I KNEWW. He genuinely believed he was doing what he had to do to protect the both of us...I'd probably also give everyone the benefit of the doubt idk. Vash understanding Knives' motivations but still holding on to that (justified) resentment and anger is ESSENTIAAAL to their dynamic and also literally all of Trigun. Sexual abuse throws a rock in all of this. If anything I think Knives would tell Vash "I'm the only one who WOULDN'T assault you. They're human, they'll only see you for how useful you are. It's what they do. It's what you know they do. You're choosing them over me the same way Rem chose Steve over us." Knives' abuse is complicated and multifaceted, not just some gross display of power. He's not even the most power hungry character in the world. He's got a whole cult dedicated to him that he canonically IGNORES.

And he sure as shit doesn't respect people who are desperate for power over others!! He'd think he's above that too. Just more evidence of human deviance. (Like the scene in 98 where kid Vash and Knives are watching the humans fight over water. Animals who think one is more deserving of resources than the other.) He's narcissistic in the literal diagnosable sense but definitely not some kinda megalomaniac. I think that's a huge mischaracterization. He doesn't want to rule the world, he wants to destroy it. And he wants Vash to be his equal in this, he respects Vash. (as far as someone like Knives can respect anybody at all) He doesn't understand why Vash would choose to be so "dumb" because he's never allowed himself to feel the vulnerability of potential harm that Vash wants him to understand is worth it. It's why he locks himself away from the world, he's afraid of being victimized again. Knives' morals are all over the place, he genuinely doesn't think murder is bad but would consider sexual violence to be the worst thing anyone could ever do EVER. It's not like we're talking about the beacon of reason and consistency here y'all, Knives is cray cray sauce.

Anyway that's my thoughts, sorry this took forever to answer. 😿 And ended up being SOOO long.. I've on and off mauled over this writing and rewriting again trying to make any of my garbled thoughts make any sense. Hope it resonates with anybody at least bc I genuinely feel like I've been taking crazy pills lately LOOL. Take care of yourselves everyone. 💖 Never an easy subject to talk about.

[smokeygrayrabbits]

I have no explanation for this, but it needs to be out of my notes app.

I've been thinking about modern au trigun. stampede specifically but take your pick.

just . . . divorced dad vibes older brother knives trying to spoil the heck out of tiny little broke vash who is moved out on his own and is also really bad at money

like,,,, maybe SEEDS was a cutting edge tech company from forever ago. maybe vash and knives are still immortal, and so when the giant rich company that raised them (experimentation? adoption? who knows.) went under after a massive fire, vash and nai saverem inherit everything. but it's locked away until they turn 18 because idk bank stuff or something, so they're functionality broke, homeless orphans for a while. maybe vash lost his arm in the fire or something. maybe the sold it for parts idk.

little genius babies become the only plant engineers in the world overnight, with plants having been a new cutting edge technology only in development by the seeds corporation. baby nai starts inventing stuff and maybe becomes a mob/cult boss or something and drags them out of poverty.

nai wants to get back to the tech industry luxury and rebuild, vash has fallen in love with humanity and life and wants to live with the people and be part of society.

they grow up. nais doing some sketchy stuff and is now the head of his own company. vash is,,, idk college maybe? couch surfing? NO I GOT IT! HES LIVING OUT OF A VAN!!! for fun, but also because it's how he grew up and he feels most at home on the road not in the big empty house where nai is never home.

nai is very exasperated by his brothers lifestyle choices, but also very over protective, so he's always sending vash fancy expensive things and making sure vash has connections wherever he goes.

also!! vash wasn't/isn't oblivious to nais illegal dealings. he helped him run the mob for years when they were younger, but never liked the violent side of it

he mostly delt with like, maintaining relationships between smaller local gangs and organizations in other cities, all of whom adore the funky lil baby who would come visit them and consult on their crimes

so yeah. rich people wanna be the saverems, and crimy broke people love them! (because of course any mob partially run by vash would take care of the community). nai makes a point of bringing people from his illegal buissness into his fully legal and very profitable professional one, mostly at vash's request and recommendation.

after a while of this, vash is like "I wanna see the world!! :D".

nai is very worried about this. his baby brother is leaving the nest!!! nai knows how dangerous the world is, heck, he runs half the danger! but vash is stubborn AF so he goes on tour.

probably ends up meeting Meryl and wolfwood and Roberto and/or Milly somewhere along the line, all of whom are very confused about the rich tech mogul who lives in a van and eats packaged ramen with wagyu beef. Meryl smells a story. Roberto smells a rat. wolfwood is a simp.

shenanigans ensue.

throw in a little livio tried to steal from one of nais operations, and to work it off wolfwood took the fall and now has to babysit vash.

nai looked at wolfwood and was like "ah yes, protective big brother, knows how to do hard things for the greater good. he will be good to teach vash the importance of sacrifice" or something, but then on their first time meeting wolfwood watched vash bribe a cop, threaten a mob boss, and inhale a whole box of really shitty gas station donuts within like 2 hours and was head over heels immediately.

at some point, nai gets kidnapped or something and is freaking out about who will look after vash now, only for vash to come in and save the day really epically

nai remains in denial and sobs all over him.

nai also totally like, flys his private jet out to wherever vash is when he's having a bad day because he's a fraud and is actually just as big of a baby as vash is

after wolfwood and vash get over their inevitable idiots to lovers arc, wolfwood will randomly wake up on the floor of their little van bed to find that nai kicked him out in the middle of the night with no warning that he was gonna show up

nai sends them anniversary or holiday gifts and vash gets like, a truckload of super expensive currated stuff and wolfwood gets a handful of Cheerios nai found a pigeon eating on the subway that's shaped like a middle finger or something

or like, a half eaten hotpocket

motherfucker would give wolfwood a half eaten cup of instant noodles

or just the empty styrofoam cup which nai saw a pigeon eating, it reminded him of wolfwood, so he went over to personally wrestle the cup away from the winged rat. in a buissness suit. in the middle of the day. it was videoed, which then went viral.

sticky note on top "happy holidays fuck you wolfwood"

that link was the best present Wolfwoof ever got. he teared up a little.

vash was touched by the amount of effort nai put into wolfwoods present. he did it personally Nick! that means he likes you!

wolfwood does not believe it for a second.

[bozepomagaj]

Welcome to the abyss!

Where's your stop?

1st layer (introduction)

2nd layer (interests)

3rd layer (blog rules/other)

4th layer (writing requests)

⫷-1st Layer-⫸

I go by Ellain! I am a 19 year old lesbian (surprising, I know), I use any pronouns and I love writing. I am disabled (JIA and like 10 different other things) so I tend to leave for weeks randomly but I promise I'm alive&well🫰. HUGE fan of Prushka, Shiro and Lain, I'd also add Sirin but after 4 years I'm dropping HI3rd so goodbye old friend.

I'll focus on fanfiction as of right now as I still feel a bit self-conscious about posting my own original works. I'm a huge fan of AU's so a lot of my works will include different AU's. English is not my first language and I'm still trying to improve on expanding my vocabulary so if you ever see any kind of mistake in my works, feel free to correct me as I'm using this as an opportunity to improve my English skills.🫶

⫷-2nd Layer-⫸

My interests vary and change VERY quickly and I tend to drop my previous interests once I find a new one (neurodivergency is a bitch) but currently my interests are:

- Trigun (Maximum&Stampede too)

- Chainsaw man (part 1&2)

- JJBA (1,2,3,4,5,7, currently reading 6,8&9)

- FFXIV (very early into the game lol)

- Made in Abyss

- Serial Experiments Lain

- Deadman Wonderland

⫷-3rd Layer-⫸

What will I write?

character x reader

character x character

headcanons

angst (yummy, my favorite)

fluff

hurt/comfort

one shots

drabbles

Less likely:

In case there are topics like drugs/gore/graphic violence/etc. I will make sure to properly tag them.

Crossovers

I have a lot of different headcanons for characters but I will try to not force them on a character in case I'm writing for canon instead of an AU. But you might see me slip in a few here and there (cough cough trans plant twins cough cough)

I do not plan on involving myself into any kind of drama or discussions. I have a primary blog for that so please keep that out of my ask box <3

This is obvious but ANY kind of transphobia/homophobia/etc will absolutely not be tolerated on this blog.

⫷-4th Layer-⫸

Writing requests are open!

Whether it's expanding on my own ideas or writing small drabbles or just writing your own ideas in there my ask box is open. I only ask for minimal respect (aka, don't expect me to write something in an hour or two, it takes me quite some time for me to finish my works and don't demand things!). As for now, I'll be focusing on Trigun content (specifically Vash&Knives as I've done the most research on them) but I will update this post once this changes (BECAUSE IT WILL)

Recent works:

[How to train your dog.] - part 3 of the Trigun College AU series

[July 21st] - a short drabble for the twins birthday

[crossroadsdimension]

Managed to find time to watch episode 3 of Trigun Stampede tonight and MMMM. MAN. Was not expecting them to go that hard that fast with the plot.

(long spoiler-specific thoughts for Episode 3 under the cut for those who haven’t seen it yet. Very rambly, I’m just writing out my thoughts after finishing the episode.)

So, not only introducing some members of the Gung-Ho Guns (well, down one now, thanks Knives), but also introducing Knives and how dangerous he is three episodes in?? The original manga and the 90s anime did NOT need to go that hard, but the modern one decided it did.

Not only have we established that Vash brings chaos and disaster wherever he goes as he tries to keep everyone alive, but we’ve also established the theme of the show. Whose side are you really on, Vash?

I mean, they asked that question of him three times in this episode alone, and at least once in episode 2.

This is a question Vash was asked in the manga, but maybe not in this specific wording. He can’t keep doing what he’s been doing.

Vash wants everyone to be alive and get along, right? “Peace and love” is still present in his bones, even if he hasn’t said that theme aloud yet. However, that means he bounces between helping outlaws as much as he helps the innocent townsfolk who are just trying to live their lives and not get killed by the gunmen who want to take their Plant and get rich off it.

Vash would probably say he’s on the side of humanity in his current fight against Knives, but we can see that Knives is working with humans here, EG Miner and the “doctor” with the giant mecha and the strange, somewhat familiar looking child with him. (I have to wonder if that one’s a puppet for the puppet master, or if the kid’s another Independent Plant, but I’m not seeing any of the circuitry-lines on the kid that Knives and Vash have on them, so I’m not sure. (EDIT: Just found out the kid’s actually supposed to be the Crimson Nail, which really threw me off. Now I’m wondering what else is going on with her.))

But the Gung-ho Guns have sided themselves with Knives for their own reasons, and I would not be surprised if the “doctor” is aware that Knives is planning on killing him when his part of Knives’ plan is complete. I wouldn’t put it past the crazy Independent. They have chosen their fate.

Vash drifts from town to town, rootless and side-less, playing with the line in the sand like it’s a jump rope. Knives wants him on his side, and is more than happy to prove his strength over Vash’s in order to get him to give up, break, and join his big brother on Knives’ side of his self-proclaimed war of extermination.

Vash has yet to truly plant (ha) himself on humanity’s side. He’s lonely, keeps himself distant...the man needs to create bonds and plant himself somewhere, especially despite Knives’ actions. Knives is working with humans to reach his goal for Plants, and is using humans as tools in order to achieve that. If he causes trouble for Vash in order to prove that humans can’t be trusted, that they’re parasites, then all the better.

Vash...Vash is alone. He doesn’t want to use anyone, and as a result, he’s probably pushed plenty of people away from him.

This show is going to pit him against problem after problem after problem, and with Meryl, Roberto, and (probably as of next episode) Nicholas D. Wolfwood at his side, he’s going to find himself with people who don’t want to leave him, who won’t let the typhoon of the plot push them away, and he’s going to have to come to terms with what Knives wants, and what he wants.

Vash will pick a side. He has to.

But then the question becomes...how many people are going to drop right in front of him before he breaks and decides?

As for Knives himself -- man. He looms over the manga and both anime, for different reasons.

In the manga and the 90s anime, he loomed because he was an unknown force. Because he was what kept Legato in check, and let him have free rein to torture Vash as he pleased. And then, in the manga, he loomed because we knew what his plan was, he was constantly on the horizon in that ark, calling his sisters to him, and it was only a matter of time before things came to a head against his brother.

Now?

Now Knives looms because we have seen him. We know what he’s capable of. He defends himself with his own plant powers and laughs in the face of Vash, who shoots at him with human made weapons and shoots at him wildly. Vash, who has pinpoint accuracy and good eyes, can’t land a hit on his brother because he’s terrified of Knives.

And he’s terrified of who he is, too.

My dad made a comment on it when I said that Vash has access to power the same way Knives does, but he hasn’t “unlocked his gate,” as Knives put it.

Dad: “Maybe he’s afraid of it.”

This is another part of what keeps Vash drifting in the winds. He’s refusing to acknowledge who he himself is. He’s still that scared little kid, scared of his brother, wanting to be human, more than willing to reject his past. He’s trying to cut himself away from his roots just as much as he’s trying to cut himself off emotionally from everyone around him, to keep himself distant but physically present.

Just as he has to pick a side -- against Knives and all he stands for -- Vash is going to have to pick a side with himself. And when he’s broken down and pulls himself back together...if he wants to keep himself and every human alive, he’s going to have to come to terms with who he is, just as much as which side he is on.

Otherwise, Knives will win long before this series started.

[peskygirl13]

The Owl House Characters in Twisted Wonderland Dorms

I was bored and procrastinating on my other works while watching The Owl House, so I made this.

In summary, this is what NRC dorms I think TOH characters would be in and why.

Luz

Luz would be in Ramshackle since she technically can’t use magic. She’d totally teach glyphs to Yuu, who would defiantly appreciate any assistance they can get dealing with the Overblots. Luz would also totally react to the Ramshackle ghosts the same way Yuuken did.

I also think that she’d dote over Grim the same way she dotes on King, making King jealous and ultimately decide to stay with her in Ramshackle.

Eda

I was torn between two dorms for Eda, Pomefiore and Savannaclaw, but I ultimately decided that she’d be a better fit in Savannaclaw due to her energy, power, and owl beast/harpy form.

She totally competes in magishift, with or without her magic, and I also feel like she’d teach the boys Grudgeby (idk if I'm spelling that right, but whatever). She also comes up with schemes ideas to help Savannaclaw with their matches. While I don’t think she’d approve of hurting anyone (that didn’t deserve it), she’d defiantly be impressed with Leona’s ‘stampede Malleus’ scheme.

I also whole heartedly believe she’d get along great with Jack, Ruggie, and Leona since she radiates ‘mom’ energy. 

I also feel like Leona would get annoyed by King for some reason and that Eda would have a friendly rivalry with Vargas.

Amity

I feel like Amity would be in Pomefiore or Diasomnia. I feel like Pomefiore would be a better fit because of her strive for perfection. 

She’s getting better, but her personality in early season one was snooty before her transition to the current Amity we know and love and when comparing it to the dialogue of the mobs in the game, I feel like that’d she’d fit in with Pomefiore. And she still strives for perfection and positive feedback (mostly from Luz, whose opinion she cares most for), which reminds me of Vil. 

If Amity hadn’t gotten the help she needed and instead saw Luz as an obstacle, like how Vil sees Negie, she could’ve very well had a breakdown like Vil’s when he overbloted.

Also, her purple and moon aesthetic fits in with the dorm.

Willow

I think that Willow would be in Heartslabyul because of her plant magic and her dedication.

She has a good heart, but she also has no problem crushing anyone who’s in her way or that’ll hurt her friends, which I think would fit in with Heartslabyul. She’d also probably see a lot of similarities between Amity and Riddle, so she’d defiantly try to help him out.

I don’t think she’d approve of painting the roses red, so I think that she’d simply make some grow specifically for the Unbirthday parties or it’s also possible that she could create color changing roses.

She also probably helps care for the Botanical Garden, which makes her run into Leona a lot. I think he’d remind her of Bosha and because of this, I seriously doubt that she’d take any attitude from him.

Gus

Gus was kind of hard to place. I think he’d Scarabia.

Gus is obviously incredibly smart, having skipped a couple grades, and he’s always willing to learn more about something he’s interested in. 

He’s also creative and resourceful with his magic (see season two, episode five of The Owl House).

I also think he’d fit in with Ignihyde.

Lilith

Like Amity, for Lilith I’d either go with Diasmonia or Pomefiore.

Like Amity, Lilith strives for perfection, committing bad things just to do it (ex: cursing Eda, continuously trying to bring her to Emperor Belos, using Luz to get to Eda, etc.) like Vil did, however she’s severely misunderstood, much like Malleus. Plus, she’d defiantly try and get into what was considered the ‘best dorm.’

Idk why, but I think between the two she’d be better in Diasomnia.

Spoilers for season two under the cut if you haven’t seen it yet.

Golden Guard/Hunter

Like Luz, Hunter would be in Ramshackle since he technically can’t use magic. I think he’d be upset about joining the ‘reject dorm’ at first, but eventually grow to like it. 

Since the Dorm Leader is a magicless human that instead relies on a monster, I think he’d appreciate or admire Yuu overtime. Especially when he sees how they live without magic in a world that seems to run on it, something that he struggles with.

I also think that with Yuu’s help, he’d learn how to work with his Palisman since they have some experience with Grim.

[zet-sway]

Spiritual Shrios Summer - EMBRACE

This is a prompt fill for @rosenkow’s Spiritual Shrios Summer!

Prompts | release | oasis | moan | delirium | pray | sweat | whisper | afterlife | contaminated | skin | worship | incense | godless | petals | taste | nectar | caress | mirage | ripe | sundown | hallucinate | salt | intoxicated | soul | embrace | hunger | wet | adrenaline | breathe |

PROMPT WORD: EMBRACE - | - WORDS: ~6100

Rated: “E” for “Awkward but Spicy” [NSFT] AO3 Link: "Too Much and Not Enough” Pairing: Thane / FemShep Summary: Maybe it's the traces of venom in her system or maybe it's just him, but this man beneath her - this assassin, feared and infamous for the lives he's taken - swells her heart with trust. It's a new and curious thing, so different from the trust shared between brothers in arms. It's simple intimacy, and maybe… just maybe… something more.

A/N: This fic is a god damn hot mess, and yet I have literally *never* revised anything so heavily in my entire life. Was supposed to be part of a slow burn but I'm impatient. I literally can't tell if this fic is worth reading. You decide lol

Thank you @quietonewisp for your feedback on my first draft! It's unbelievable to be in the same fandom with such talented writers after all these years. Thank you also to everyone who shared encouraging words while I was pulling my hair out over this fic :) this is my first attempt at writing Shepard as a thought out character of my own creation. As a result it's pretty awkward.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

"I don't know how you do this," Shepard grunts through clenched teeth.

Every third day is yoga. And today, she thought it would be a good idea to try a headstand.

Thane guides her feet into the air, resting her knees against her elbows. Her hands are planted on either side of her head, elbows bent at a right angle to form three points of support against the floor. Truthfully, he hadn't thought she would struggle so much with this pose, given her strength.

"Push with your hands. Distribute your weight."

Slowly, he releases her calves and repositions himself behind her as she pulls in a sharp inhale, holding her balance.

"You better not be staring at my ass, Krios."

He raises a brow ridge. It's hard not to stare at her ass, thrust in the air as it is.

"You forget that I have perfect recall," he says dismissively. "I can reflect on the image of your backside at any moment of my choosing."

"So you admit you've been looking?"

"Shepard," he admonishes, "Just because I've seen your ass does not mean I consciously seek to see it." It's a stone cold lie, but an easy one to sell, especially when she makes a point of training her glutes every day during their morning PT.

Slowly, she lifts her knees into the air, shaking with the effort to retain her balance. "I bet you're an ass man," she grits out, one leg finally pointed straight into the air.

Thane sets his hands on her calves to steady her as she wills through the pose.

"I'm unfamiliar with the term."

She huffs, swallowing down a breath before speaking. "A man who prefers ass over breasts."

Only humans would have a word for something like this, he thinks. "As you know, women of my species do not have breasts."

"Yup," she hisses, slowly and carefully straightening her other leg. "That's why you've gotta be-" another shaky breath, "-an ass man."

Well… she's not wrong.

In truth, he finds breasts no more desirable than any other mundane part of the human body. The appeal, he suspects, comes from actually touching them - something he hadn't considered at all until she'd launched herself at him in the airlock weeks ago. He's replayed the experience in his mind hundreds of times by now. The insistent press of her mouth on his, her smooth human hands clutching at his shoulders... and the soft crush of her body against him. He hadn't pulled away, but he hadn't kissed her back either. Right now, he wishes he had.

There's a curious connecting thread between his return to the Normandy and her sudden urgency to speak to him - frequently. Even more curious - neither one of them has broached the subject of her impulsive kiss before his procedure.

With a relieved sigh, Shepard finally manages to straighten both legs and complete the pose. Toes pointed toward the ceiling of the shuttle bay, she trembles. It's all he can do to not close his hands around her thighs to feel every rippling muscle under her skin.

"Excellent work," he says, voice perhaps lower than he intended.

"My head hurts."

Thane shakes his head. "You're not distributing your weight through your hands. Push down, and lower your knees slowly."

She makes a strained sound, tenses her legs, and the motion is just enough to pitch her center of gravity backwards.

He catches her, but not before the rounded curve of her ass is pressed with distracting persistence against his hips. If he could have blushed, he very well might have. Looking remarkably contorted beneath her splayed hands, she grins at him.

"How's your perfect recall going to handle this one?"

He should say something, but he doesn't. With steady arms, he lowers her to the mat and she flops against it, sighing heavily. There's a familiar quiet about her, something he's come to recognize as the silence before a storm.

"...can we talk about this?"

His deflection comes instinctively. "Your mastery of the headstand will take some practice, but-"

"No," she says firmly. "This." She waves a hand between both of them. "I kissed you goodbye and we're both acting like it never happened. It was inappropriate of me. Did I upset you?"

This time he needs a minute to think.

"Shepard, I… no, you did not upset me."

"But...?" She sits up, knees drawn in a loose spread against her chest, arms looped around them. The same focus he'd seen in her face on Tuchanka is there now. But this time her expression is uncharacteristically open, visibly hanging on his next words.

She's not even trying to hide that she wants him.

So why does he resist?

Ten years ago he swore he would never love another, and he meant it. The compulsion to remain ascetic is by now second nature in him. But although the years have not dulled the memory of his beloved Irikah, they have brought a new perspective: the fires of one love are not dulled simply because the fires of another are kindled.

"I've recalled that moment more times than I can count," he says, finally.

"So... does that mean you liked it?"

"I enjoyed your kiss enough to admit that should the opportunity arise... I may not let go."

She leans closer, fingers lacing together with visible anticipation. "And what if I didn't want you to let go?"

The look in her upturned face is what does him in. In a rare display of impulse, he drops to the mat and kisses her. And this time he intends to savor it.

Somehow, the same humility that drove him to his knees before Irikah now folds him again as he gazes into the unknown with Shepard. A purpose, a reason to fight. And now perhaps... a reason to love. He's not sure if he would call it love just yet, but kissing her awakens his body like hot tea on a bitter cold morning. She draws him between her knees, lips parting eagerly beneath his seeking tongue. She tastes like coffee with an undertone of alien unfamiliarity, and his pulse quickens. He's already eager for more.

Shepard mumbles something against his mouth and he pulls away.

"You taste tingly. That's normal right?"

He smiles gently back at her. "Normal for humans, as I understand."

They lean together for another kiss before she releases him. "We still haven't done cardio."

He slips his arms around her waist and tugs her tighter against him, using his strength to pull her up with him as he stands.

"A quick jog around the hold, then?"

"...or," she says coyly, all suggestive eyes with a cautious smirk blooming across her face. "A quick jog upstairs?"

He shouldn't. At least - old habits tell him he shouldn't. But his heart says it doesn't much matter.

"Promise me one thing," he says with caution, taking her hands in his. This is not how he’d imagined his morning. After all the time they’ve spent seeking each other’s company, he hadn’t dared to think...

Shepard tips her head, listening, fingertips idly exploring the subtle texture of his scales. His throat feels dry and the words are stampeding through his mind so fast he can barely catch them.

"Embrace her memory as I have. Smile upon her with favor." The memories mingle together, threatening to overwhelm him. Shepard has already given him so much, and he still asks more of her.

"Your wife?" She leans into his neck, kissing his shoulder softly.

"Yes." He squeezes his eyes shut. His breath threatens to choke him. "I cannot and will not stop loving her. She is with me always."

Shepard smiles at him, as though he's asked the easiest thing in the world. Her next words are an intimate whisper against his lips.

"What kind of Commander would I be if I told you to stop loving your wife?"

Her breath fills his chest with warmth and wanting. Cupping her face in his hands, he kisses her glistening lips as though they were crafted specifically for him. They inhale each other, her tongue sliding against his as he breathes in her kiss. The word murmurs through his mouth and mind as a soft wind sighing through trees and grasses. "Siha."

This could be his second chance. An opportunity to fight side by side with a warrior angel, as he should have done years ago. Irikah was not a trained soldier, but she damn well could have been. She would have given everything to defend the innocent, and by all accounts, she had. Their son, alive because of her and her alone. He can taste her in the kiss, a familiar and soothing encouragement that makes his heart soar. Perhaps if he survives the mission, he will have learned something of her bravery.

There's a gentle tug on his shirt. Shepard leads him toward the elevator.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

When they stumble into her cabin, her eyes are already bleary with his venom. Thane presses her into the bed, one hand cradling her neck while the other winds into her hair. His lips are slow but strong, kissing her like he knows nothing else. She's never felt so wanted before.

"How far do you want to take this?" she gasps when he trails her mouth down her jaw.

"This was your idea," his mouth is scorching on the column of her neck. She leans back to give him better access. "How far do you want to take this?"

Her insides are on fire at the feel of his mouth alone, and logic says she's crazy to jump into bed with another fucking species so suddenly. But she doesn't care - she's spent enough sleepless nights imagining this very moment. She wants his hands on her bare skin, she wants the forbidden unknowns of his alien body. With every fiber of her being, she wants. But it's easier to think about it than to say it.

"More," she says finally - breathlessly. Words are fleeting. Her hands fist the edges of his shirt and he obliges, pulling away so she can lift it off before she begins pulling off her own.

And then he surprises her by playfully rolling her on to her belly, kissing the back of her neck, her spine, palms trailing an electric line down her sides.

"I confess," he murmurs between kisses, "You were right to accuse me of being, as you say, an 'ass man.'" She moans as those strong hands settle on her backside, fingers kneading her flesh with delicious strength. Good god.

Words are difficult, but she manages. "Don't get any ideas, I'm not letting you fuck my ass."

"It wasn't my intention. Is that something humans do?"

Shepard snorts. "Don't act like you didn't know that."

He laughs like she's never heard before, a rich and jubilant peal in that dark voice she's come to savor. She can nearly feel the soft vibrations of that laugh through his hands as he presses his fingertips between her legs. “I’d rather know where you burn hottest,” he says, and she can hear the smile in his voice as he strokes her just hard enough to make his intentions understood.

"Oh fuck yes."

His palms return to her backside, sliding up to hook his fingers into her waistband. "May I?"

She nods furiously, her own hands closing over his to push her clothes off.

When she's firmly on her back again he drags down the zipper on the front of her bra. It's flung on the floor with the rest of her things and then she's bare before him, biting her lip under the heat of his hungry gaze. She wonders if he can see her body vibrating in anticipation.

"Beautiful," he murmurs, settling his knees between her thighs. He crawls up to kiss her. "For weeks, I've thought about touching you."

She hums as he strokes the rounded edges of her breasts.

"Your body is so wonderfully soft, will you tell me if there's something you don't like?"

"Yeah," is all she can manage before his mouth returns to her neck, his hands wandering like a dying man searching for water. She's certain to have hickeys by the time they're done.

Curious, she brings a hand up to stroke the delicate flesh of his throat. His answering groan confirms her suspicions, and suddenly his questing hands are not so chaste, closing with suffocating warmth around her breasts.

Shepard bites her lip. "Please don't tell me you think breasts are gross."

He shakes his head. "I'll admit I find it strange that human breasts are erogenous, given their purpose. But they aren’t ‘gross,’ as you say. Just... new." She pushes her chest into his palms and that gets a rise out of him - a lovely trembling purr in his throat. "And so soft, Siha."

"Feels good," she murmurs. With parted lips, she breathes her pleasure as he kneads her breasts in slow, sensuous circles, dipping his head to kiss along her sternum and at the tender underside of her flesh.

"I think I might like them,” he says, lips twinged upwards.

Her need flares with that simple statement and she pulls in a breath, straining against him.

"I hadn't imagined how... tempting they could be. Soft curves... ripe like fruit at peak season." A strained moan falls from her mouth when he punctuates his statement with a more appreciative squeeze and draws a thumb over one sensitive peak, his mouth close enough to make her whimper in frustration.

“You’re teasing me.”

"I’m exploring you, Siha. There’s so much to learn." He circles his fingertips around her nipples and they tighten in response. The visual alone has her reeling, electric sparks of need slipping down her spine and straight into her core. "Your body shows me what it wants," he murmurs. "My mouth begs to taste you."

He flicks his tongue out, sampling her in light, infuriating strokes, teasing until she's keening beneath his hands, eyes shut tight and panting over clenched teeth. It's hard to think about anything at all except his hands and lips and that rumbling voice shimmering across her sensitized skin.

She strangles out a moan when his lips close around her nipple and he hollows his cheeks, drawing it into his mouth before releasing it with a soft, wet pop. Her arms clamp reflexively around his neck in an unspoken order to keep still.

"Do that again," she gasps.

He complies without question, textured fingers on one breast and wet tongue on the other, toying with her. Her back arches, hands holding herself like an offering to his mouth, every touch like a phantom crack of lust between her legs. There's a low rumble in his throat, he's practically purring into her skin and she can feel it, thighs clenching together in desperation.

She whines when he finally pulls away.

"I'll be back for those," he promises. "I hadn't expected such enthusiasm."

Fingertips brush her inner thigh and she leans into the touch, wanting more - for fuck's sakes - more - gasping out a shuddering breath she didn't even know she was holding when he flattens his fused fingers into her seam. Face buried in her neck doing god knows what with his lips and tongue, he's exploring her by touch alone. Each press of his hand is excruciatingly gentle, pushing slowly into her slick channel, gliding upwards to her clit. She's so sensitive that she flinches when he brushes over it, clutching at his shoulders.

"Too much?" He asks.

She hadn't even realized her eyes were closed. Her throat is dry, but she rasps, "Not enough."

His full lips curve into a smile before he strokes her again and this time she moans, pushing back on his hand as much as she can manage. Her mind is chanting "please, please," but she won't beg. Not yet, at least.

His voice rouses her from her desperate thoughts.

”Your species makes great effort to avoid using definitive terms for this part of your body."

"Do we?” She asks, willing her thoughts to clear enough for her to speak. “I mean, there's pussy, snatch... cunt, if you're feeling profane."

His voice drops a register lower, and he leans close enough for her to feel his hot breath when he speaks. "Shepard, I believe the technical term is vulva."

She groans. Loudly. "Fuck off."

He huffs out a stiff laugh. "Perhaps you'd prefer something new. Ara'te. Chalice of Arashu."

She tries - and fails - to hide her impatience. "Really?"

"Do you find it repulsive?"

"No, I just... mixing religion and sex is kind of..." She fumbles with her answer, not wanting to offend, but the words are gone from her when he leans in and draws the flat of his tongue in a wide sweep between her legs. "-Jesus, Thane."

His voice is thick with amusement. "How interesting that you invoke the name of a god you don't believe in, if I touch you just so."

Shepard's mouth snaps shut and she looks pointedly away from him with a huff.

"But I digress," he says, fingers rippling along her seam. Scaled hands smooth over her slickness, spreading her with gentle consideration. His mouth is dangerously close, gaze fixed on her with eyes like gleaming onyx. Something in the way his voice drops sets her heart racing.

“You feel like the softest silk,” he whispers, each word rolling off his tongue in a veil of hot breath that cools over the heat of her wet center. Her eyes flutter closed as he presses his exploration, teasing her entrance with his joined fingers.

"Your body is a wellspring," he murmurs, slowly penetrating her with his hand. "Drenched with arousal… begging me into your depths."

She gasps when he takes the opportunity to flick at her with his tongue. Hips grind against his hand, desperately seeking more.

"What the fuck," she moans. "Don't stop."

He withdraws only to enter her again, this time sheathing an extra finger in her heat. Those fingers crook inside her and she damn near twitches off the bed, drawing a sound from him somewhere between amusement and arousal.

"So sensitive, Siha."

It feels like she's melting under the intensity of his touch, a thumb moving in teasing circles around her clit. She hisses, thighs clenching.

"Holy shit just touch me."

"Like this?" he asks in a tone that's infuriatingly playful, barely skimming his tongue across her clit.

"God damn it, Thane, you know what I want-"

He interrupts her, his voice suddenly more serious.

"Show me."

There's silence, and then Shepard blinks at him. "What?"

"Show me how you like to be touched."

"You want to watch me?" her mouth goes dry and her answering tone is more accusatory than she intends. "Because you're a freak, or because you don't know how to touch a woman?"

"Yes." He says simply, dodging both of her questions with irritating smugness.

Her knees twitch inward, uncertain, and with a deep inhale, he withdraws.

"Siha," he murmurs apologetically, taking her hand. "You've left all your confidence on the battlefield.”

The words slip straight through the cracks in her armor. It's painful, but he's right. Cerberus didn't bring her back because they wanted her, they brought back Commander Shepard. The woman she used to be is an afterthought. There's only the mission. The Hero of the Citadel. The Commander.

But here they are, Thane's enormous black eyes boring holes into her defenses in a silent plea for… something. His hand finds hers and their fingers intertwine, resting together on her hip. His expression is more unguarded than she's ever seen, eyes asking a silent question: Do you trust me? Do you want me?

"All my victories have been on the battlefield," she says, looking away.

His thumb soothes back and forth over her hand.

"Intimacy is not a war. What do you hope to triumph over?"

Still unwilling to meet his eyes, her face twists with discomfort.

"I haven't had a lot of partners. I'm laying here naked and you're playing games. I can't tell if you're just teasing or looking for an excuse to drive me off."

His expression softens. "Our differences are not merely physical, then."

She isn’t certain what he means, but Thane shifts to lay next to her, kissing her temple. His fingers tighten around hers in a gentle grip that doesn't let up, finally summoning her eyes back to his.

"On my heart, Siha, there is no place I would rather be than right here with you." There's a genuine apology in his tone, prying her heart open one painstaking centimeter at a time. "Do you want this?"

Her voice is small, but she doesn't hesitate. "Yes."

"Show me what you like," Thane's lips brush against her ear. "Remember that I won't forget." The way his voice rumbles makes her shiver.

He takes her hand and presses a kiss into her palm before setting it atop her thigh. It’s a relaxing gesture, indirect enough that he's not backing down while also letting her choose the next move. His lips are unhurried, traveling up her neck, against her ear, along her hairline.

Years of lackluster partners have tempered her expectations - she’s never shared herself with anyone as intense as Thane; and although she'd never admit it, his sexual confidence is damn near intimidating. But his hot breath against her ear and his endless, patient kisses are an irresistible pull of wanting.

This man is far from bored, she realizes. He's only awaiting her permission to give her something she's never experienced.

Her chest rises and falls in deep, shaky breaths. "No games," she whispers.

"No games," he agrees.

Biting her lip, she guides his hand back to the apex of her thighs. He offers no resistance, humming his approval when she slicks his fingertips through her heat and sets them carefully against her clit.

They move together then, her hand on his, teasing herself while he kisses her neck and shoulder, slowly making his way across her chest. How long has it been since she found release beneath the hands of another? The quiet intimacy of their joined hands, the subtle texture of his scales leaves her breathless, delirious with pleasure, his fingertips sliding effortlessly against her slick center. His mouth wanders over her skin, her breasts, every touch so electric she’s almost not ready for how fast her release sneaks up on her.

"I'm close," she whimpers with eyes squeezed shut, "Oh fuck, Thane, I'm so close."

"Yes, Siha,” he whispers. “Come for me."

She breaks. Every cell in her body clenches in a singularity of pressure before she's launched out in a million pieces, shimmering in the dim light. For once, it doesn't feel cold in her cabin. Waves of heat ripple under her skin, pulsing with every second she spends teasing the tail end of her climax.

She doesn't realize she has a death grip on his hand until she's gone completely still. If it hurts him, he says nothing, only wrapping an arm around her waist to pull her close. When she looks back at him, he's watching her with a knowing, lustful smile. She reaches for him, stroking his delicate neck and earning an appreciative hum that makes her heart beat just a little faster.

"Not that I didn't like you before, but..." she brushes her fingertips along his jaw, tilting his head toward her, "God damn."

Maybe human biology actually is as interesting as he proclaims, if one good orgasm can flood her with this much oxytocin. Like crossing a proverbial threshold, she feels her confidence returning, if only just to tell him we are definitely doing this again. As soon as possible.

"The privilege is mine." His voice is flecked with desire, words she believes so wholeheartedly she can almost see them in the air.

"How are you still wearing pants?"

He growls approvingly as she climbs over him and her fingertips slip beneath his waistband.

"Let's see what I'm about to get myself into," she says with a sly upturn of her lips.

"Or, if you wish - what you're about to get into yourself, " he retorts with no small amount of innuendo.

Immediately she wishes they'd done this sooner. He's... gorgeous. It isn't so much that she thought he wouldn't be, but his anatomy is every bit as colorful as the rest of him and that is a surprise. His length blooms from its internal sheath, a strong and gently ridged gradient of red and purple, nearly glowing in contrast against his green scales.

"Nice," she breathes, reaching for him. "Sorry if I don't have any pretty words to explain how much I want to put this beautiful thing in my mouth." Then she has a thought. "Do you have any fancy words for 'dick?'"

He puffs out an amused laugh and cracks a smile. "I seem to recall you saying something about religion and sex..."

"Humor me," she says, leaning in close enough to make his breath catch from the proximity of her mouth alone.

"Amo'ti," he says. "In your language-"

"Spear of Amonkira?"

He raises a brow ridge at her. "I'm impressed."

She gives his length an appreciative squeeze, testing the give of his ridges, humming at the surprising velvet texture of his skin.

"Maybe," she says slowly, matching the intensity of his gaze, "You can tell me how impressed you are after this." And without any further pretense, she engulfs him with her mouth.

In an instant, his head tips back, and she feels a familiar confidence returning. Men, she thinks, are hopelessly predictable in their pursuit of a hot mouth to fuck. And exactly as expected, Thane's hips are rolling gently forward. She slips her tongue around his length, watching the dancing iridescent scales along the shifting planes of his thighs and stomach.

In the back of her mind, she wonders if drell even do this as much as humans do. But it doesn't seem to matter when he sets his jaw in rapt concentration, visibly struggling to keep his eyes open and fixed on her. She doubles down, flattening her tongue against the underside of his shaft and hollowing her cheeks on the upstroke. His hands thread into her hair, sweeping it from where it falls in front of her eyes and gathering it around his fingers.

Tempted to tease him, she pulls back until the very tip of his length rests against her lips and sweeps her tongue across the head with a seductive smile. Their eyes lock and the sound he makes causes her core to fucking throb with wanting. One hand working him with each teasing swipe of her tongue, she slips lower, plants her lips on the base of his shaft to kiss him with an open mouth. He's shaking now, he's got to be close-

With a strangled gasp, his hips twitch away from her and she stills herself.

"I didn't hurt you, did I?"

"No," is his breathless response. "Quite the opposite. Come here."

She climbs astride him, pressing the length of their bodies together as his arms enfold her. "That good?"

"Join with me, Siha," he murmurs, his voice low and laced with need. "Find your release in mine."

An unexpected chill slips through her, tingling every nerve with an onset of understanding. She can hear it in the undertones of his voice: I want you. This was never a game. We will be whole, together.

He rocks against her just enough to grab her attention. The brush of his length between her legs is electrifying - his eyes searching, his body asking.

"I'm… uh…" Shepard bites her lip, processing the words slowly. "I haven't been with anyone since I... came back."

His fingers intertwine with hers for the umpteenth time that morning. It's a gesture she's rapidly coming to adore for all its patience and admiration. He kisses the back of her hand, voice low and steady. "You're in control, Commander."

There's something in his well-placed acknowledgement of her authority that placates her. Maybe it's the traces of venom in her system or maybe it's just him, but this man beneath her - this assassin, feared and infamous for the lives he's taken - swells her heart with trust. It's a new and curious thing, so different from the trust shared between brothers in arms. It's simple intimacy, and maybe… just maybe… something more.

Eyes never leaving his, she steadies herself and sinks down on him.

They join together with delicious slowness, his hips willfully unmoving beneath her as she takes him in. The pressure is exquisite, edging somewhere between too much and not enough, each ridge of his florid length finding its place within the scorching depths of her body. She's nearly sweating as their hips go flush, eyes tipping closed with the sweet pulse of their joining.

One painstaking second at a time, she adjusts. It doesn't hurt, but she's afraid it damn well might if she starts riding him like her lust-fueled mind is screaming to. She stifles her own desire, wills her body for control as she twists and flexes herself to banish the lingering anxiety about her reconstruction. It might even be embarrassing - wriggling against him like a damn virgin - but there's no judgement in his eyes. If anything, he's holding back his own pleasure, unmoving while he waits for her. Hands braced against his shoulders, she pushes up, finally bottoming out with a low, wanting moan. His length lodges against her deepest reaches. It feels fucking perfect.

"Fuck," she breathes with a cursory flick of her hips. "Holy shit, Thane."

Features painted with pleasured focus, he's stone still beneath her, hands patiently cradling her waist. Thane, her unlikely but disciplined lover, waiting for her next order.

Her voice is a whisper against his lips.

"Let's fucking do this."

And with that, he begins to move with her.

The groan in his throat vibrates through her entire body as she begins to ride him. Her fingers clasp around his shoulders, afraid to put too much pressure on his transplant scars. He grasps her hands in his own, holding her firm and letting her weight fall against him, hips rolling with her as she finds her rhythm.

His voice is a breathy sound somewhere beneath her. "Siha… don't hold back."

She gasps when the next thrust hits home.

"Shut up," she huffs, slanting her lips over his.

Despite their hours spent together on the battlefield, his strength is shocking. It's near impossible to tell who's riding who, his hands firmly on her hips, his body moving beneath her like the rolling ocean, all muscle and sinuous control. Either sex is way better than she remembers, or he's just that good. He ripples in and out of her depths, each of his gentle ridges strumming her like a harp, sweat rolling down the back of her neck.

His venom is already refreshing its hold on her mind when she breaks their kiss for breath. There's a kind of weightlessness to the high - she floats up, baring herself to his wandering hands. They slide against the plane of her stomach, cupping her breasts, plucking teasingly at her nipples. It's enough to make her cry out, heedless to the rest of the world, grinding on him for all she's worth. She feels the hot coil of release building within her, sensations concentrated in every point of contact. The texture of his scales against her inner thighs, his teasing fingertips on her breasts… his burning length buried within her, filling her to completion like no other.

In the throes of his venom, her cabin disintegrates, and there beneath an endless veil of stars, they are one - chasing release in the arms of the other. Words can't describe this perfect headspace. Later, all she'll be able to say is how he feels so good, wishing she could borrow his eidetic memory if only for these few perfect, fleeting moments, to revisit at her behest.

She slips one hand down to massage her clit and pitches her head back in a gasp, walls clenching involuntarily around his length, drawing a low rasp of pleasure from his beautiful, perfect mouth. Their voices are a litany of breathless sounds, a chorus of shared ecstasy - the desperate succession of skin meeting scales, the trilling of his ruby throat and the expletives that fall from her parted lips. She's close - unbelievably close - and damn near unwilling to finish if it means this moment will end, a rare second climax bearing down on her as she folds against him. Even with her hand trapped between their bodies, the sweet pebbled friction of his scales threatens to push her over the edge whether she's ready or not.

She releases with a scream, his name barely intelligible in a strangled half-sobbed cry of bliss that can't be silenced even as she buries her face in his shoulder. Thane's strong arms wind around her waist, holding her as he drives into the silken, pulsing clench of her heat with abandon. The sound of him illuminates the darkness behind her closed eyes as he spends himself within her and she can feel it - a glittering tingle of sensation radiating between her legs, up her spine and blooming into a full scale high.

And then she sags against his chest, heaving breaths in tandem with him, unable to give two tenths of a shit about her hand going numb between them.

"Thane..." She whispers. "Thane, holy shit."

"Are you hurt?"

"...No. I feel... tingly. It's good. It's so… just, good. Holy shit." Her head lolls against his shoulder. She won't open her eyes - not yet. Whatever's going on out there beyond his embrace - for once, it's not her problem. She feels over-relaxed, tinged with unreality. Like a dream. When had she gotten so damn high? If they'd barely -

...Oh, she realizes.

Drell toxin. Inside her.

Thane hums in contentment, his familiar alien hands soothing through her hair. She wonders if he feels just as sated as she does.

"Tell me it was good for you too," she whispers softly against his aural ridge.

"Siha," his voice is quiet, as if murmuring a secret, "It feels unfair to tell you how many times I will revisit this memory."

"I'll allow it, if you tell me we can do this again."

"As if you even need to ask," he chuckles breathlessly. "Yes, I’d like that."

"I don't think I've ever been fucked like that. I’m not sure I’ll be able to walk straight.”

“Not the word I would use, but I’m glad to hear I’ve pleased you.”

She feels his mouth move in a smile and takes a strong inward breath, raising her head to look at him. She can see her own silhouette in his fathomless dark eyes.

"Say it," she demands.

His brows - those gorgeous, expressive, glittering emerald brows - raise in curiosity. It must be the venom making him so vibrant.

"Pardon?"

Shepard extends one finger to gently prod his chest. "Say 'fuck.'"

He laughs beneath her and it feels like her whole body is bouncing, joining him in his mirth.

That laughter reaches his eyes and his expression softens. "I think perhaps we've overindulged. I didn't expect you'd be so heavily affected."

Her eyes widen in mock incredulity. "Overindulged? Don't you dare tell me that was too much for you."

A viridian palm settles against her cheek, his lips curled in a soft smile so rare it seems like a gift. "What I mean to say is it may have been too much for you, Siha."

She pauses, pushes herself up on shaky arms and sits back on his thighs. He's softening within her, and the retreat of him leaves a trail inside her that feels... not exactly, but... Sort of like someone stuck a breath mint where it doesn't belong. Shepard smiles inwardly. It feels kind of great.

"I'm Commander Shepard," she intones, setting her hands on her hips in a dramatic display of confidence. "I can handle getting dicked down by the most deadly lizard in the galaxy."

Thane is damn near grinning now. “My apologies, Commander. I will think twice before underestimating your abilities in the future.”

"I'm not moving until I hear you say 'fuck.'" She retorts, arms crossed.

"You're wrong, if you assume I want you anywhere but right here."

He reaches for her arms, trailing down her to her wrists to clasp her hands. Above him, she watches as though entranced, the dim light of her cabin blurring the edges of her vision and bringing the slow intertwining of their fingers into crisp focus. For all their differences, they fit together so beautifully. Her heart feels full.

"Thane..."

Their eyes meet as he kisses her fingertips.

"Fuck you, Siha."

[shewhowantsmouseears]

Shattered, 11

Notes: As always, big thanks to my amazing editors, Drucilla and BlueShifted!

I'll admit the ending is pretty lackluster, but ultimately I'm glad I gave this kind of story a try, and I hope you all enjoyed the very depressing ride. Thanks to everyone who liked, reblogged, commented, and gave me such beautiful fan-art! I couldn't, and wouldn't, do this work without all of your love and support. Also big thanks to Modmad for inspiration behind one of the pairings, let's be real.

Lastly, I want to say that one of my editors, BlueShifted, will be temporarily stepping down. Send them a lot of your good thoughts and love, because they deserve it!

Summary: In the depths of the coldest winter, Minnie manages to find the one love that no ice could destroy.

Minnie could no longer be sure about the truth of the weather, for her insides stayed cold no matter how roughly she rubbed her hands as she rode one of the reindeer with Goofy. Ratface stayed on her shoulder, cuddled up close only because he “felt an itch” that her ear was good to scratch, and nothing more, so he'd insist. Occasionally from within the carriage beside them Daisy would call out and ask if Minnie was all right. Minnie would lie and say yes she was, and Daisy would pretend to believe it since there was nothing she could do to fix it. As the hours piled on, so did the snow, starting lightly in front and then growing heavier as they journeyed forward.

They encountered pine trees that were heavy with white, and further still trees that had died a frozen, miserable death some ages ago. For a brief moment of time, Minnie wondered if somehow they had gone backwards and returned to her village, for the setting began to seem very familiar. The absence of plants and color, the dead quiet all around, and the snow that never relented... The way they traveled was not for anyone, it was as if it had been made to dissuade people from going any further. Goofy began to shiver, but he didn't tuck his arms around himself for warmth – he saved that for Minnie, wanting to do all he could to keep her steady on the reindeer.

Occasionally the wind blew, but not enough to blind their vision, which was their last saving grace. Donald was worried about the horses, but Goofy assured him that they wanted to see this through to the end, if only for the sake of their mistress – who whined about how cold she was.

“Who told you a fancy gown was suitable for travel?” Ratface huffed when Daisy complained yet again. “It's only going to get worse from here. If you want to back out, do it now.”

“You won't be rid of me, ruffian raven,” Daisy said after a not-so-elegant raspberry from the carriage window. “We shall reunite Minnie with Mickey, and free the land from eternal snow! I just wish I had packed along thicker gloves, is all.”

“Don't suppose anyone's thought of a plan about how we're freein' the land?” Goofy asked as he trembled atop his reindeer. The herd stayed close together as possible, trying to group for warmth. “I'm stickin' with ya'll, but I still ain't sure how we can stop a lady that's been doin' this forever. How do we make her listen to us?”

Minnie had hoped by the time she got this far she'd have some idea of what to do, but there was still no great plan that came to mind. Saying so would only worry her new friend, so she kept it to herself. “We'll figure it out. As long as we keep trying, we'll find a way.” If only because they must, if only because there was no alternative. None of them could go back to the way they'd left things, be it a freezing village, a saddened kingdom, or a hurtful family. There was no option but to keep moving forward.

“May your determination keep you alive, pretty girl,” Ratface said rather solemnly, his eyes ahead, “because we're just about there.”

This got everyone's attention, and they all peered as best they could through the thick, falling snow. At first they couldn't see anything, and Donald would have given Ratface a good tug on his tailfeathers for the trick, but as they continued, they felt the land go down in a slope, and a shadow was descending upon them. Whatever was ahead was blocking out the sun more than the clouds ever could. There was a triangle shape in a misty form, but with each hoofbeat, it became clearer and more solid.

Rows and rows of icicles peppered what was once a lovely and quaint forest, now making it a hazardous place to traverse. The dirt and ground path was frozen solid, and there in the distance lay the landmark that sent a hard wave of fresh fear throughout the group – it was if a tidal wave had crashed up into the land and then had been frozen there completely, spikes and shards of ice sticking out everywhere, reaching up all the way into the heavens. It was disjointed, abrasive, and just looking at it was painful. This had been the creation of someone in unimaginable pain, someone who had done all they could to lock themselves away from the world.

Donald swallowed heavily. “I don't exactly see a front door we can knock on. How are we supposed to get inside?”

“I imagine she lets her soldiers in and out whenever she wants.” Daisy tapped her fan to her beak in thought. “But if she doesn't want us in, she's not letting us in.”

“And we'll be hard-pressed to find a way otherwise.” Ratface stood upright, on edge now that he was so close to what he'd been avoiding for ages. “A hundred human soldiers couldn't break down that ice.”

Perhaps this was true. Minnie looked at their surroundings, or more specifically the furry ones. “How about less than one hundred reindeer?”

Goofy clapped once. “Aw, that's a great idea! Reindeer are much stronger than people! You are some kinda genius, Minnie. Everybody ready?”

“No,” said Donald.

“No,” said Daisy.

“No,” said Ratface.

Minnie didn't bother.

“SOUP'S ON!” Goofy stuck two fingers into his mouth and whistled a note so high that Minnie winced, and after that, every single reindeer began to stampede forward, horns out at the ready. Since this was to be a much bumpier ride, Goofy lifted Minnie into his arms and held her like a careful package, despite how painful it was due to her chill. Donald groaned, but after a tug on the reins, the horses raced on far in the back.

The first reindeer didn't make a crack, nor the second or third. But by the time the thirtieth reindeer and all its siblings crashed into the icy wall, not only did it crack, it was thoroughly and completely crushed like a thin ice cube in the palm of a hand. Inside, the reindeer continued on an icy road but began to slow down as it became clear that bunching up together would only lead to their doom.

Within the ice palace was a single stretch of pathway, and stepping off it meant dropping into a bottomless pit. There were hovering patches of ice with fresh snow that drifted back and forth like eerie stepping stones, and they floated up, down, left, right. The carriage pulled to a stop, and Donald gently helped Daisy down. At first she thought the walls were coated blue, but a startled blink revealed the truth – soldiers. Hundreds, if not thousands, of soldiers lined the walls, waiting for orders, unfeeling, unthinking. Daisy dove into Donald's arms, frightened by the number, and Donald felt much the same, clutching her tightly to his chest. Goofy gulped audibly, taking his time to lower him and Minnie down off the reindeer, no longer shaking just from the cold.

“There,” Ratface said softly, and Minnie turned her head to look up ahead.

The pathway rose high with white stairs, leading to a grand throne where the Snow Queen sat, her dull eyes observing her guests. She didn't appear to be surprised by her visitors, but then it was difficult to imagine her with any emotion at all. Though she was far away, Minnie felt the terror that seized her when she first met the dreaded woman face to face back in her village. Her toes clenched up in her red shoes, the precious ones she'd gotten from Daisy, and she wanted to run away and abandon the mission.

Instead, she walked forward, through all the reindeer. One by one, her friends followed, their steps echoing, the silence determined to drive them to madness. In turn, the Snow Queen rose from her seat, staff held ready in her fingers, and she began to descend the stairs. It all seemed very formal, like the heads of warring nations coming together for a talk of peace. Minnie kept her chin up, never looking away, only stopping when she reached the foot of the stairs. The Snow Queen stopped in the middle of the stairs, and the staring contest started anew.

Minnie took a deep breath, though it agonized her lungs. “My name is Minnie,” she began, “And these are my friends. Ratface, Daisy-”

“I know who you are,” the Snow Queen interrupted, holding up a hand. “I have been watching your useless journey.” As she spoke, Minnie glanced at Ratface, trying to read his reaction, as he stayed absolutely still, eyes wide. “I had thought you all knew my lessons well...but it appears you refuse to learn, and so must be punished.”

Daisy found her voice very easily. “I'm glad to have flunked your lessons! You took away all the light and love of our world, and we're here to get it back!” Donald tried to hold her back, but this was proving futile. “Return Mickey to Minnie at once! They deserve to be together!”

“If that is what you wish.” The Queen's grip on her staff tightened, and it began to emit a faint blue glow – and so did one of the soldiers from the walls. He jumped onto one of the floating ledges, jumped again, and indeed this was Mickey, weapon at the ready, and within seconds it became clear that he wasn't returning to Minnie for a happy reunion.

“Scatter!” Donald cried, unable to think of anything else. He grabbed Minnie by the wrist and jumped onto the nearest floating ice patch which proved quite slippery, and Ratface took to the air. Goofy stumbled backwards, and Mickey landed at the foot of the stairs, ready to start the chase anew – and then Daisy threw herself at the boy, arms around his neck, trying to tug him backwards.

“Mickey, you must wake up!” She pleaded – all those in the Golden Kingdom have been trained to fight the Queen's soldiers, and she hoped it would finally do some good. “Your true love came all the way to save you! Don't you remember?” Mickey wordlessly clenched Daisy's arm, and threw her off with one hard swing – Goofy held up his arms to catch her, and wound up bowling into the reindeer, who were doing all in their power not to fall off the path.

“He has two shards within,” the Queen said calmly, as Mickey ran ahead to catch up with Donald and Minnie. “His memories are gone, and there is no power that can restore them. Such is the fate that awaits you all.” More soldiers began to light up, signaling they were about to join the fray.

“Not good not good not good!” Donald yelped as he tried to keep his footing, and Minnie, on the floating ledge, seeing the other soldiers getting off the wall. Mickey landed hard on the same patch, causing the ledge to tilt his way. Donald staggered, and then pushed Minnie hard. “Go!” and she obeyed, trying to hop onto the nearest ledge. “All right, you big palooka, let's see you-” but Mickey was in no mood for exchanging pleasantries – he smacked Donald hard with his spear once, twice, and when Donald tried to duck and tackle, it was like hitting a brick wall. Mickey shoved him aside, and leapt on to the ledge where Minnie had just begun to slide on the ice.

She fell onto her side, and gasped as Mickey stuck his spear into her dress to keep her there. She gazed up at him, at his lifeless blue eyes that saw nothing. “Mickey,” she whimpered, but there was no reaction. Her mouth fell open, wanting to beg and plead, wanting to say all the things that built up since he'd been gone, but found no words to express them. The Snow Queen was right about one thing – he wasn't going to listen. Not like this. She then held her breath as she understood. “You're not my target.” No, if she wanted to fix things...

“Comin' through!” Goofy hollered – before riding on a reindeer that slammed Mickey off Minnie. Maybe he wasn't good for much in combat, but even an ice warrior had difficulty fending off hundreds of pounds of solid flesh and horns. Minnie sat up, and could see Donald and Daisy trying to hold their own with the soldiers that had joined the battle, reindeer rearing up and kicking and ramming any in their way. Any soldiers that fell off the path seemed to vanish, but were actually waiting until they hit the wall of brethren, so they could grab, climb, and start all over. Ratface tried to help as best he could, pecking and biting at the soldiers, but he made no affect at all.

Throughout this, the Snow Queen stayed in place, not truly watching, her eyes distant. As far as she was concerned, she already knew the ending. Once their bodies were worn out, she'd plunge her shards deep into their chests and add to her collection - this Minnie knew. The shards, the shards, it was all about the shards, and Minnie held her aching chest, seeing what others could not. She had to act quickly, before another soldier came for her, but her movements felt tired and sluggish due to the chill in her heart.

“I know what you want to do!” Minnie cried out as loud as she could, though it did not turn the Snow Queen's head. “You plan to use your shards on us all!”

“It is your punishment,” the Snow Queen replied without looking at her. “And it will be what is best for you, and for the world. A world without love is a safer world.”

“How can you say that it's best...” Minnie staggered, but kept on, her back hunched over. “When you don't understand at all? One shard takes over the body... two shards takes over the mind... but you never put a second shard in your heart!”

At last, this made the Snow Queen's head whip around, her eyes wide. As if all attuned to her, all of the soldiers stopped what they were doing. Ratface dove for Minnie's side, flapping his wings hard in the air. “What are you saying?! I know what I saw, she pushed them right into her heart!”

“You saw her push in one shard!” Minnie rebuked, her eyes still on the stunned Queen. “But she closed herself away before you saw anything else... I know she didn't take the second one! It never happened! She remembers everything, she hasn't lost a single memory!”

The Snow Queen's began to turn towards Minnie, her face staying the same but her eyes darkening. “Your fear drives you to insanity, child.” Her voice still had the same disturbing calmness – but the words shook, holding back. “I remember nothing, as do all of my soldiers. That's why they will never wake up and return to their lives. I gave to them the same thing I gave to myself.”

“Liar!” Minnie screeched, and though she felt tears near her eyes, they lacked any natural warmth. “You're lying! I know you never gave yourself another shard, and you still have your memories in you... because if you didn't... because if you truly forgot everything the demon did to you...we wouldn't be here!” She held out her hand, gesturing to the horrors all around her. “You wouldn't be trying to 'save us' from love, if you didn't remember every part of it for yourself! If you really wanted it gone, you would have erased it from yourself entirely! But... you kept it....” Her breath hitched, as she felt her very insides growing numb. “I know what the demon did to you, I know the things he said and what happened to your wings...”

The Snow Queen's free hand began to shake, before curling up, fingernails pressed into her palm. “If you really do know what happened to me... then you know why I erased those memories. I would want nothing to remember him by. There is no truth to your words, I will not hear them!” Suddenly her once peaceful voice became louder, and all of the soldiers turned toward Minnie. One by one, they began moving toward her, and her friends became more frantic in their efforts to stop them.

“You do remember, and I know why you kept those memories!” Minnie heard Mickey coming for her, and knew that he would show her no mercy, that no matter the tears she shed or the answer to his last question, he was gone, and would stay gone if she stopped. “Because despite all the pain you feel, despite what happened to your wings, despite everything... You don't want to get rid of the memories, of that time when one person made you feel loved!”

“Silence!” The Snow Queen's frozen facade began to break, and the mirror atop her staff glowed deeply, harshly. “It's not true! None of it's true! Make her stop!”

Mickey came up behind Minnie and grabbed her by the arm, forcing her backwards, but she pulled forward, even as her bones began to grow cold, even as her muscles lost their feeling, even as every part of her was in endless pain. “He made you feel like you were important! Like you were special! He made you see a part of you that you never knew was there... and he made you happy! You never wanted to forget that, you couldn't go through with it! No matter how much it hurt to remember, you wanted to keep him with you!”

How much was she speaking of the Snow Queen, and how much was she speaking of herself? She could no longer tell, the lines between these lost lives now growing blurry. Ratface had stopped his flying, stunned at what was being said, his beak agape, mind in the past. Donald, Daisy, and Goofy kept trying to fight past the soldiers, to save their dear friend, but all they could do was delay the inevitable by mere minutes.

“That's why you're doing this!” Minnie yelled as Mickey held her arms behind her back, to the point where she was certain something would break soon. “You hoped that if you got rid of everyone's love, yours would vanish on its own! But it won't! It never will!”

“Stop it! STOP IT!” The Snow Queen – Magica – had begun to scream, clutching her hair, all the emotions she had tried to kill rising up and clawing at her throat. “I SAID STOP IT!”

Mickey's hand came for her throat, and Minnie used the last of her strength, “After all this time, more than you love mortals, more than you love helping them, even now – You still love him!”

“NOOOOOO!” Magica's hands were on the staff now, not even aware of what her powers were doing, all she could hear was the voice she wanted to silence and all of its truth. The mirror began to crack, over and over, and then – it in a wind as harsh as a scorned lover, shards flew out and sank into Minnie's chest. Not just one, or, two, or even three – countless shards entered her chest, and her eyes lost their color, her entire body went white, and then -

“Minnie!” Ratface shrieked, taking to the sky, but it was too late. Ice formed from within Minnie's chest, and then quickly climbed all over her body, encasing her like a clear coffin, growing up and down in an icicle that could not be broken. Mickey was flung backwards by the sheer force of it, although he was quick to stand up and await more orders from his Queen. All the soldiers were doing the same, stopping in place, as the ice around Minnie finally stopped. All the color was stripped from her body, even her clothes, and not even the blue from her veins could be seen anymore.

Magica dropped her staff in silent shock, her hands trembling as they came to her mouth. “No... no... w-what have I done...?”

“Minnie!” Daisy burst into tears, but that didn't stop her from running towards the wall of ice that held her friend, Donald and Goofy in tow. “Minnie, darling! Minnie, wake up!” She banged her fists on the ice, but not even a speck came off. Donald slammed his hands hard, and Goofy had one of his reindeer bang into it, but nothing would make the prison budge.

“Pretty girl!” Ratface tried to claw at the ice with his talons, yet couldn't leave a scratch. He hadn't cried since he betrayed his lost love, but now tears fell hard, as he scratched and scrabbled. “No, no! You were supposed to be different! Oh, I should never have taken you here! I should have left you be!” He hit his wings on the ice until his small body gave out, and he dropped from the sky. Daisy caught him in her arms, and they wept together, unable to look away from Minnie's lifeless body.

They were not alone in their grief – Magica fell to her knees, shaking her head wildly, as if that would undo the life she'd taken. “This... This wasn't supposed to happen! I was trying to help you! I... I was trying...” But the words fell flat, doing no good, being forced to confront reality – that in her years of reigning torment, she hadn't helped anyone. Why did that girl keep fighting, when she knew she couldn't win? Why did she keep moving forward when everyone else had given up? Magica didn't know, and didn't know what to do. She'd never given anyone more than a second shard. The third was only a threat, only to keep them in line, only to protect mortals from the pain of love! “I wanted to help...”

The soldiers kept waiting for orders, unable to grasp what was happening around them. As Mickey waited with them, a red blur touched his face.

It was one of the rose petals from Minnie's hair, all of them now floating gently downwards, having been flung from her body as she'd been encased. None of the soldiers acknowledged it. Mickey went to remove it, as it was an obstacle, and all obstacles had to be eliminated, so he picked it off his face and -

And he stopped. His hollow eyes remained on this petal, staring intensely, for reasons unknown to him. He felt it between his fingers, though he could no longer feel anything at all. So why was he holding onto it? Why did he refuse to let it go? He knew he had seen this color somewhere else. It meant something to him, more than orders from his Queen. This was more than a color, more than a petal. It was a symbol, an accomplishment, it had been work and effort and determination, never giving up despite all the odds. He knew this, because... because... didn't he...?

Slowly, his eyes went up, looking at the girl in the ice. Why did she have this? Who... was she...?

“...Minnie...?”

~*~

Little Minnie laid in the snow, knowing it was piling on her but unable to feel it. She couldn't feel anything, and it was getting harder to see anything in the pitch black night. Her voice was worn out from screaming for Papa, it was clear he wasn't coming. She was all alone.

Except Minnie of the present was there too. She blinked down at her younger form, pitiful and pathetic as she took shallow gulps of air. She remembered this night very clearly, and at her worst moments and deepest fears, it came back to her with resounding force. Sometimes it felt like she'd never escape this night, and maybe she hadn't, maybe everything up to now had been a mad dream of death. She sighed, and looked at the door, knowing Papa and Mama were on the other side. This had been done as an act of love, twisted and cruel as it was. He'd only wanted to protect her, to show what would happen if she defied the Snow Queen.

And he was right, wasn't he? Wasn't she dead? Or something close to it. She hadn't been able to defeat the Snow Queen and rescue Mickey. She led several innocent lives along her insane quest and now they'd be turned into mindless soldiers too. Everything had been for naught. Maybe it would have been best for everyone if she really did die this night.

She'd been scared of the cold for so long, letting fear hold her back from everything. Now here she was, devoured by it, and she looked down at her child self, wishing she could warn her of the terrible things to come. Maybe if she did, she could avoid this awful fate and save her friends. Papa had done this for the best. Papa had meant well.

She knelt down in the snow, but as she began to brush the powder off of her younger form, she paused as her eyes reflected herself. She saw her fur had now gone completely white, as opposed to the child beneath her, dark as night. She really had been so small, so weak, so fragile. If they had waited a minute more to get her inside, would she have truly died? All to protect her, to punish her for believing in Mickey's dream? Instead of fighting for their child's right to happiness, or their own, they would have rather let her suffer? They too had been afraid, they too had let fear hold them back. She understood what they had done, but...

“What Papa did was wrong,” Minnie said quietly, for the first time in her life acknowledging the sin of her elder. “Even if an act is done with love and worry...it can still be wrong. And you didn't deserve this.” Carefully, she scooped the child up into her arms and held her to her chest. “We didn't deserve it... I didn't deserve it. I wanted to believe in a future where I could be loved and happy... and that was not a bad thing.” She was so cold, but the child was... warm? Like a soothing fire that crackled and welcomed, and the snow around them began to slow down to a halt.

What was this new feeling in her heart? It was so unlike any of the other emotions she had discovered. It was soft, yet bold, taking a firm grip in her soul and giving her strength. It was a strange happiness, a new confidence, it was something she had never known was possible and yet now that she knew it – she felt she understood everything.

Like mirrors all around her, she could see Ratface, Daisy, Donald, Goofy, her parents, the Snow Queen, and Mickey, cheerful Mickey, wonderful Mickey, and around them she saw herself and what she'd done with them – for them. All the times she had listened to their burdens, offering shoulders to cry on, friendships and devotion, courage and conviction, sacrificing her own well-being for their own.

Was this love? Was this how love was supposed to feel? This...was not the love that Magica had tried so hard to erase, because Magica didn't have this kind of love. So very few people did, and that had to change. This was why it had hurt the Queen so deeply to be betrayed, why Ratface had given up everything to save her, why Goofy stayed with his abusive family, why Donald had given into anger so much, why Daisy threw so many of her parties, why Papa and Mama never told Minnie a word of kindness, why everything had stayed the same and nothing had changed.

This love was unique for every person, and Minnie smiled as she understood, as the younger version of her vanished, taking its proper place in her heart. She held herself, and warmth overflowed every single part of her body, as if the entire sun was blossoming inside of her. She knew the name of this love, and she knew it would free her.

“I am a good person,” she said softly, eyes shut. “I try my best to help those I see, and it makes me feel good when I do. I have helped people find their bravery, I have defeated evils that can no longer hurt others, I have taken steps no one else dared to see. And from now on, no matter what happens... I promise... I will never stop loving myself!”

When she opened her eyes, the ice encasing her began to split, then hiss, and then in a flurry of heat and water, broke apart entirely, flooding the crevasse below with pools of warm water. As her feet touched the floating ledge, grass began to take root suddenly, growing at a wild rate, wildflowers popping into existence in every shade of the rainbow. The ledges fell into the water, floating around, and the flowers and grass continued to grow, melting the icy pathway and giving life and form to the ground. Minnie laughed as the water splashed at her shoes, grabbing the ends of her dress and twirling around. The white was gone from her hair, and the blue was gone from her skin. At last, at long last, her nightmares were over.

Mickey dropped the petal from his hand – he remembered being a boy and planting seed after seed, never stopping despite how many failures he'd encountered, all for the sake of bringing hope to the village he loved. He knew he could save his people, he knew he was doing good for them, and he – yes, he could – he could also love himself – and with that, the spell on him was utterly destroyed, the blue on his skin evaporating at once, the fresh color of his eyes were restored. He dropped his spear, staring down at his hands, with his normal clothes restored to him as well as his heart, his breath, his ability to feel and touch. Then that delightful sound touched his ears – Minnie, laughing. Had he ever heard her laugh before? It was the most beautiful sound in the whole world.

“Minnie!” he cried, and he ran towards her, unable to last a second longer without her in his embrace. But he wasn't alone on that account – just as he'd taken her his arms, her name was joyfully shouted over and over by the friends she'd made -Daisy went for a rather hard tackle, taking all three of them down into the knee deep water, and Donald joined in, ruffling Minnie's hair between her ears, then came Goofy, seizing everyone into his long arms for a great big squeeze.

Ratface dove into Minnie's lap, pushing his head to her chest. “You stupid girl!” He sobbed openly, even as Minnie held him and kissed his head. “How dare you do this to me again! I'll leave for good this time, I swear it, you'll never see me anymore!”

“I love you too, Ratface,” Minnie said with an extra giggle, and then she looked around, unable to stop smiling, joy in every word. “I love all of you, with all of my heart! I'm so glad to have met you, and be with you! I'm so glad to be alive! I'm...” Yet she trailed off, once her eyes fell on the shocked Snow Queen. The other soldiers stayed in place, still trapped, and she had yet to move, eyes wide and mouth open.

Mickey jerked, and then went on the defensive, standing up with fists clenched. “You! After all you've done...” But Minnie gently pushed aside all the tender holds and stood up, placing a hand on Mickey's fist to lower it.

“How...?” Magica asked breathlessly, her hat sliding off her hair and rolling onto the ground. Her glorious throne was cracking and melting. “How... did you come back? I don't understand. You kept trying, and you didn't stop, no matter what I did or what anyone else threw at you. How can you still stand up? How are you alive?”

Minnie picked up the ends of her dress so she could walk out of the ocean she'd created, and stepped onto the grass, which many reindeer had now taken as lunch. She stood in front of Magica, and smiled. “You couldn't erase love, no matter how hard you tried. No, not really. You made parents afraid of loving their children, of villages afraid to love their people, and of two people afraid to be together. But there was a love you could never destroy, because you didn't know it existed... because you never felt it yourself. And that kind of love will always find a way, even if it takes centuries.”

Kindly, lightly, she leaned over and held Magica by her cheeks, lifting her face up. “You never knew how to love yourself.”

She looked back at her friends, who watched in awe, candles of comprehension beginning to burn within. “We all forgot how to do it... and so many of us need another's love in order to see it for ourselves. We become so focused on loving another that we can't see the good in us. We look for others to make us feel special, because we can't find it in ourselves. But... it is there. Sometimes it needs help, but it is there. We can all find a way to love ourselves.”

Tenderly, she stroked Magica's hair as she would do to Ratface's feathers. “And you? It won't be easy, after all the pain you've caused... but I know you can find it too. The person you used to be, who helped others because that is what they liked to do. The person the demon fell in love with. She's still there, and she deserves love, the same as everyone else does. Everyone deserves love... especially from themselves.” With that, she gently kissed the top of Magica's head.

The final touch of pure warmth melted the spells – the palace of ice began to dissolve, and the soldiers staggered, waking up, one by one, some falling over in shock, others running to their loved ones in mad joy. Magica's minks and robes fell apart, revealing the divine, simplistic robes she once wore as an angel of the earth. Magica gasped, pained, and then suddenly she held Minnie closely, weeping into her, and Minnie allowed it, continuing to stroke her head and let centuries of agony pass through.

The staff fell apart, melting away until there was only the mirror left, and the crack still remained, except now it did not look so terrible. In a different light, it was not seen as an imperfection, but a quirk, perhaps. Broken still, but not inherently bad because of it. All around them, the forest quickly regrew into its natural state, the water rolling away into the open mud and dirty path. The clouds parted, and when Magica lifted her teary face, Minnie could see herself reflected in those eyes again, and she was proud of what she beheld.

“I'm sorry,” Magica groaned, her fingers holding firmly onto Minnie's dress. “It's not enough, it will never be enough, but I am sorry.”

“Not everyone will forgive you,” Minnie said gently, “And the wounds you made will take a long time to heal. But...I think anyone can start over, if they really want to try.” She glanced backward, and met Ratface's eyes. He gulped audibly, but knew he could stand back and watch as a mere audience member no longer. He stepped back, then forward, flapping into the air and landing on Minnie's chest. He tucked his beak softly to her chin, a silent show of gratitude for the journey she had taken and all she had endured. She kissed his beak in return, thankful for the way he'd shown her and the protection he'd tried to give.

Minnie held out her arm, and Ratface walked down along it, trembling quietly as he looked at Magica, who was quietly watching him in return. Slowly, Magica held out her hands, and Ratface walked into them, his eyes blurry with years of tears. “I was so caught up in the bliss of loving you,” he murmured, “that I never considered the world around me, and that the things I had done that would catch up to us. I wanted so desperately to be special, to be better than everyone, when I could have been content with me being me... as long as I was with you. I will not ask your forgiveness, I will never deserve it. But I beg you here and now... to let yourself be free to love yourself for the first time.”

Magica said nothing still, but she lowered her head, pressing her forehead to his own. The concept of loving herself had never been thought, had never been experienced, and the idea was frightening after all the pain and misery she had caused. Minnie picked up the fallen mirror, and offered it back to Magica, and in this gesture the angel could see the person she once was – the one who had been so terrified of falling to temptation she'd given away her magic. “Whoever you were,” Minnie said, her smile feeling immortal, “she may still be deep inside you. I think you can find her again.”

It would be a long, difficult task to do so, but Magica could feel Ratface – Gladstone – nudging her with his wing, urging her to try again. Maybe now she could think as Minnie did – to do nothing was tantamount to giving up, to being dead already, and the only way to attempt to fix the problem was to try. Try, try, and try again. Minnie, with no powers of her own save for her own heart, had come this far. It was time to see how far a fallen angel could go. Magica's fingers brushed up to the crack in the mirror. “Thank you, child,” she said softly, and the mirror began to glow. “Thank you for breaking my rules.”

Then the glow became bright, bright enough to blind but not enough to pain, like the summer sun shining down for the first time in ages. When Minnie could see again, the two were gone, but up in the sky, she could have sworn she saw a pair of ravens flying away. Sparks of sunlight fell from the sky, and for every sunny spark that fell, the soldiers began to wake up, their eyes clearing, their hearts open, and there was gasping and crying and cheering and singing. Loved ones were reunited, and the world was free. Ah, but yet, not all was done, so Minnie remembered. She turned around, facing the proud expressions of her companions. “Mickey... I have an answer to your question.”

“Oh!” Mickey's breath caught, and he stumbled forward, so overcome with excitement he nearly forgot how to walk. Daisy giggled as she stepped aside, Donald rolled his eyes as he pulled Daisy in by the shoulder, and Goofy began to earnestly sniffle. “Right! Th-the question! Of course! I mean, I'm sorry about the jewel, and everything, I wasn't in my right mind, wasn't in any mind, I was...” He cleared his throat, understanding he was going nowhere fast. He took a slow breath to try and calm down, and then knelt in front of Minnie, taking her hand. “Minnie... I love you with all my heart. I feel like I always have. And now I know, together, we can rebuild our village...and we can do it side by side. So, Minnie, will... will you marry me?”

Minnie tenderly put her hand atop of Mickey's, and inhaled, exhaled – she had been confident of this answer ever since she woke up to what she had been missing, and there wasn't a doubt in her heart that her choice would be the right one. She knew exactly what to say.

“No.”

Mickey's jaw dropped open in shock, but it was Daisy who yelled, “WHAT?! ARE YOU KIDDING ME?”

Goofy tilted his head. “Did I miss a step?”

Donald rapidly gestured between the mice. “You went through all that, and you say no?! Why?”

To that, Minnie let out a soft laugh. “Because I only just allowed myself to be myself! All this time we've been growing up, I haven't been allowed to think or say or feel what I really mean. How can I be sure if Mickey loves the real me, when I don't even know the real me yet?” She pulled Mickey up his feet, and closed his open mouth. “Yes, let us return home and free our families from the prison the Snow Queen made... and let's learn a little more about each other first, all right?”

Mickey snorted, but found he couldn't very well argue against her logic. He thought he'd be angry or disappointed, but instead, he felt a little relieved, and perhaps excited. “In that case... I can't wait to get to know the real you. I bet she's some kind of wonderful.”

Minnie looked to the sky, hoping she'd see one more glimpse of her flying friend, but he was nowhere to be found. The former soldiers were now embracing one another, eager to return to their friends and family. Daisy spotted her parents and flew into their arms, embracing each other with kisses. Goofy began to wail happily, and Donald sighed as he tugged him along, certain he'd need his help rounding up all the reindeer, yet couldn't find it in himself to complain.

At long, long last... winter had ended, and spring had come.

“Yes,” Minnie answered. “I bet she is.”

~*~

All the spells had been broken at last, and all who had shards within them were freed of their grasp. In the Golden Kingdom, the rightful rulers were quick to undo the damage their daughter had done – and best of all, allowed their child to be young again. Her beloved attempted the path of the guardsmen once more, and failed once more, yet he vowed to never truly give up. After all, he had a wondrous woman waiting for him at home, who gave him the confidence he lost. The outcast from the family of thieves found a new family, one that didn't consist of brothers and mothers, but of neighbors and friends who opened their arms and their hearts to him, helping him find a new home for him and all his furry friends.

The women who had become petite and porcelain dolls were now flesh and blood again, and they banded together to return to their families, eager to embrace the world that was new warm and loving as it was meant to be. The snows melted, and the ice thawed, and in one village, the joy of seeing lost ones return was enough to warm the cold souls of every single man and woman. There were wounds that needed to heal, traditions to be unearthed, and come the next year, there were beautiful roses that grew all over the land.

One day, when the village was colorful and happy and full of smiling people, there was a wedding for the first time in years.

Did they all live happily ever after? Oh, never count on such a thing. No life can ever be happy all the time, nor can it ever be constant sadness. But there is one thing to be certain of – so long as they kept love in their hearts for one another, and especially for themselves, there were far more happier times than ever before.

My pretty girl wouldn't have it any other way.

[ifistoptherain]

Stray Kids’ Fantasy AU

Chan:

“I’m sorry I couldn’t save you…”

A demigod son of Athena, the goddess of wisdom and war.

He is multi talented and knows basic spells, archery and sword fighting.

He is the sole survivor after his demigod safe house was attacked.

Felix had been hunting one of the monsters that attacked the safehouse and had saved Chan.

After the monsters were killed and Chan healed, he set up tombstones as memorial for those he lost.

Woojin:

“I’ll be sure to break a leg!”

A necromancer but he doesn’t give off necromancer ‘vibes’…Until you realise that his left leg up to the knees is bone.

He uses his necromancing abilities to walk.

He helped heal Chan by slowing down the death of his cells.

He has a bear. It’s not controlled or anything, it’s a normal bear that listens to him.

Minho:

“For the best results hold a stone or some dirt while casting; if they are really pissing you off just throw it at them” (creds to @mlm-changlix for this quote)

A witch with an affinity for water and is 100% done with ALL the magical creatures that visit his shop.

The front part of his house is the shop and is near a river and also in Felix’s grove.

Minho met Chan after he was brought in heavily injured by Felix.

He managed to save Chan but couldn’t heal all of his wounds and had to call Woojin for help — Chan still feels indebted.

He doesn’t have a familiar.

Once he summoned a demon instead of a familiar so no familiars. He later found out that demons can be used as high-level familiars. Does not want to test that theory.

He sucked at making potions.

But learnt potion making for a certain naaid who wanted to be human.

Changbin:

“I’ll huff and puff and burn your house down.”

A dragon shifter who is not as scary as he seems.

As he is a dragon, he has a longer lifespan than normal humans.

He lives in a cave near a mountain alone because he is a ‘strong and independent’ dragon.He hoards shiny trinkets such as earrings and crowns.

When angry, his eyes will literally turn red like a fire. His eyes are usually coal black.

He also has super strength and can literally spit fire if he wants to.

Changbin flies to visit Felix every few days.

Hyunjin:

“If we fail to respect nature, she will turn against us. As one of her children, I will protect her.”

Apprentice witch working under Minho who has an affinity for earth.

Healing, nurturing plants and finding rare ingredients are his specialty.

Hyunjin attracts a lot of customers and he will sweet talk them into buying potions and charms.

He sucks at potion making.

He will burn the store down or cause animals to stampede into the store cos a potion went wrong.

He is learning from Minho on how to make potions.

He has a familiar rabbit.

Jisung:

“Swimming feels like flying!”

A naaid -free water spirit (specifically fresh water), going wherever the current takes them

Known to be playful.

He lives in the river near Minho’s house

He often gets potion to turn himself human in exchange for rare sea ingredients.

When human, he likes to spend time talking to tree spirits.He also likes to bicker with Minho alot.

They once had a fight on the topic that Jisung was potentially overdosing on the potion that makes him human

‘It’s because I want to see you more! You don’t visit me at my river!’

Ever since then, Minho visits the river daily.

Felix:

“My stars are the only guidance I need.”

A human blessed by Artemis, the greek goddess of the hunt, moon, and nature.

His freckles are a map of the stars, some fading as stars collapse and others appearing as new stars are born.

He was blessed as a young boy after he took an arrow to the chest to protect Artemis without knowing that she was a goddess.

Given the gift of immortality, he is at least a few centuries old. The deepness of his voice reflects his age.

Is also well versed in Archery.

Is one of the few males to travel with Artemis. They parted ways after Felix found a grove where he wanted to settle down.

Seungmin:

“I’m glad you like my voice!”

A rare male siren. The only other male siren recorded in existence is Kim Wonpil of Day6.

The only survivor of a sunken ship because his parents sacrificed their lives to save him.

The ship sunk because the captain was lulled by nearby sirens into sleep and the ship crashed.

The sirens took pity on Seungmin, because he looked like them and raised him, so he gained their characteristics / abiliies.

Friends with the naaid, Jisung.

He left the sirens after finding out about his past and is a traveller.

Jeongin:

“I smell the food— gIVE ME THE FOOD”

A young kitsune with only one tail and white fur.

A kitsune is known for being faithful and guardians.

His powers are human body possession, flight, invisibility.

As a fairly young fox he does not have control on his abilities, and turns invisible when embarrassed.

He lives near Changbin’s cave.

He is a very hungry baby.

He needs to eat a lot to grow!!

He has both human and fox form.

He flies with Changbin to see Felix!!

Changbin ends up giving him a ride tho! He’s a poor bab who can’t control his powers too well.

[the-east-art]

you're analyses got me

(Also that post should be rebloggable? Idk why it isn't working I'll check on it in a bit)

BUT ANYWAY you raise so many good points. Like so I watched Stampede before I finished Maximum but I was still a decent ways in and I can't tell you how frustrated I was in the very first scene with the things they changed. I really love Stampede but some of their choices right from the start instantly showed a change in character direction. In the original manga Knives first calls Rem ridiculous for choosing to stay behind - indicating that he really did love her and wanted her to come (remind me and I'll do a Rem and Knives analysis sometime) and then INSTANTLY is able to tell that the Rem is fixing the trajectory of the ships. That statement is so important to understanding why she stayed back and her influence on the people. By the time we meet him in the manga, I think that Vash is a pacifist because that has become part of his identity, but I always felt that at least at the start he was a pacifist because every single person on the planet is or is a descendant of a life that Rem saved. In a way they are all related to Rem almost, they're like family even the ones that are genuinely awful people. And this specific action is what justifies Vash's desire to save everyone.

ALSO you mention the difference in wording. So in the Stampede I do like that she's at least addressing both of them (but also through soundproof glass? Cuz she can't hear them? idk) and in '98 I think that this scene is weaker since she just kind of tells Vash to take care of Knives. But the manga - damn. The wording here is so important to me. She doesn't tell Vash to take care of Knives, she tells him not to leave him alone. Rem KNOWS how Knives deals with pain and angst - she knows that he isolates himself and pushes others away. I like to think that part of the reason Rem knows this is that she also did that when she was depressed - pushed people away from her and isolated herself. When Knives is scared he doesn't talk things out, he kills everyone around him so he is alone, he scares Vash away, even when he merges with a bunch of other Plants he isolates his consciousness away from the rest. She hopes that Vash would be able to stay with Knives despite that, and manage to get through to him I think.

Okay so the other thing I was thinking about regarding Tessla and the manga version of the twins' backstory. It's about Rem, and how she tends to feel flat to me, in both anime, compared to the manga, and why I'm hoping S2 expands on the Tessla portion of the backstory with memories that Knives either wasn't present for, or would choose to show Vash when trying to hurt him--such as Rem telling them all about Tessla.

Rem Savarem, in the manga, is a woman in the throes of atonement.

In the manga, Rem is in the middle of her term of service as a watchwoman, of sorts, making sure that the ship's automated systems are all ticking along fine, keeping an eye out for anomalies, and waking other crew members from cryosleep in the event of an emergency. It's implied, but not specifically stated, that she was the one who found Tessla, and when she did, she did her job. She woke the crew, including the science team, and gave Tessla to them. When the experiments on Tessla got more and more invasive, she and Bill Conrad objected, but they were overruled, and that was that. After the science team were done with Tessla's body, they all went back into cryosleep and Rem remained on duty, meaning that, whatever objections she made against Tessla's treatment, she didn't take any actions that would endanger her job, or even protest strenuously enough that they didn't trust her to wake again if a new subject appeared.

Maybe she just didn't know how bad it was until Tessla died; it's unclear if she was actually involved in the experimentation, or just knew it was happening and that it was killing Tessla. But we know she's seen Tessla's body, and we know she regrets.

In the gigantic Project SEEDS ship, she visited this room regularly, kept it clean, and left flowers for Tessla. It should be noted that in Japan, it's customary, when visiting a grave, to clean it. You'll see people with buckets of water and cloths cleaning moss and dirt off of their loved ones' gravestones. I think the room being clean was intended to be as much an indication as the flower that Rem sees this place as Tessla's grave, and that she cares about Tessla's death.

She didn't kill Tessla. But she didn't save her either.

It's also unclear how much time passed between Tessla's death and the birth of the twins--probably about a year, going by some crew members' comments--but here's what we do know: Rem didn't do her job. She didn't wake the science team or any other crew members. When the fleet goes off-course and nearly crashes, the very first thing Rem does is make the twins hide in their rooms and swear not to come out. When the crew notice some anomalies in how the ships got back on course (because Knives tried to help by activating the emergency thrusters), Rem flat out lies to her crewmates' faces to protect the boys.

Bill Conrad catches her out on it, but since he was the other crew member who objected to Tessla's treatment, he doesn't do anything about it. Perhaps it's only because he feels the same way as her that he even suspects she's lying--perhaps he thinks, or hopes, that in her position, he would've done the same thing by keeping the twins secret and therefore safe.

Rem is seriously breaking the fleet's rules by not reporting the boys; more than that, she's been forging records for the boys so that, when they go into cold sleep, nobody will notice that there are two boys who weren't there a few years ago. Two extra among millions; who will notice a little light identity fraud, right?

In both anime, Rem is very idealistic, but we get very little indication of where her convictions come from other than that She Is Good, She Is The Ideal Mother Figure. In Stampede she might as well be wearing a side ponytail in all the flashbacks to indicate that she's a pure-hearted mother figure about to die for backstory. The manga is the only iteration where we see, in detail, Rem acting on her ideals, and that her ideals are formed not just by her own heart or the Bible, but by her experiences, guilt and regrets.

I really, really hope Stampede includes some of this in S2; it gives Rem some much-needed depth, and for my own part, I'm always here for a little space crime in the name of love and peace.

[leonmckennedy]

hello again! another part of a fill for this [kinkmeme prompt] !! i’m a slow updater apparently lol?

suggested by @likeappletrees! tagging @kunfetti who wanted the updates! (lemme know if you want to be tagged for updates i suppose? for any fic not just this one)

summary: ignis and prompto go on a cute date adventure to take some pictures! ignis’ problem is just getting worse 

parts: [one] [two] three (here!)

ao3 mirror tba soonish probably

To Ignis’ complete unsurprise, the animals Prompto wanted to take photos of weren’t the docile type. He expected as much the further they traveled from camp, away from the marshy grazing fields of the peaceful Garula and onto wider grasslands. Originally Ignis anticipated their trek to take but a few minutes, but they didn’t reach their destination until they were nearly an hour out.

He almost didn’t think they’d find anything until they turned a bush and saw, across the field, a grazing herd of long-necked beasts. Ones that typically grow several feet taller than the average human and have wickedly sharp horns perfect for charging at their enemies.

Upon arrival Prompto immediately goes about finding himself a perch, behind a tree and partially obscured by the underbrush. Ignis follows, refusing to look away under the likely possibility of one the creatures spoting them. They’re doing nothing but simply grazing at the moment, lazily eating the plentiful plant life around them. But Ignis knows enough about their habits to keep his guard up, because a group of startled beasts make for one hell of a stampede.

“A herd of Arba,” Ignis says, barely a whisper, to the excited body beside him. “You have quite a way of choosing your subjects.”

Prompto laughs sheepishly. “Yeah, well.” He finishes fiddling with his camera, placing it down on the grass in front of him. “I wanted to get some nature shots, you know? We hear about them passing through these fields a lot but I never get to take any pictures.”

And that’s definitely because they’re usually passing through areas with the intention of avoiding the giant, roaming beasts.

“Suppose there’s a reason we don’t take many leisure strolls through the woods looking for monsters.”

“I think you just don’t get art.”

The response is such a strange mixture of baffling and amusing that Ignis can’t help but chuckle. Quietly. Because nothing is amusing enough to risk setting the beasts in front of them off. Granted, they are a healthy distance away, where their shapes are hopefully hidden well by the thick Duscaen plant growth.

“Perhaps I should leave the creativity to you.”

Prompto snickers at little at that, letting the sound trail away as he picks his camera up again. He checks over the settings once again, fiddliing and fiddling until he’s properly satisfied and lays down, bracing himself against the mossy ground. Ignis drops down a little himself, getting into a more comfortable position but still allowing himself freedom of movement, in case he needs to jump up at a moment’s notice. After all, that’s mainly what he’s here for: to watch out for Prompto in case something goes bad.

Ignis doesn’t particularly think Prompto even needs it; he’s proved himself plenty capable in the past week, with the way he improves with every fight. Of course, taking down a giant herd a beasts isn’t a feat to be performed by a single person, but the point of this isn’t to fight. It’s to stay hidden, maybe run like hell when finished. Prompto’s a pretty good sprinter.

Regardless, Ignis settles himself in for the long haul. He keeps his attention on the Arba across from them for several minutes, eyeing them for any sort of sudden movements or signs that they’ve been found. After those few minutes, however, his eyes drift over to Prompto and he’s honestly proud of himself for holding out this long.

The blond is intensely focused, face nearly glued to the viewfinder of his precious camera. He’s not simply taking lots of shots, like Ignis had expected. He’s biding his time, waiting for the creatures to shift into specific positions, or waiting for the right lighting or something else that Ignis doesn’t particularly understand. He does like the creative arts, but he’s not much on photography. But he can admire the effort his friend is putting in.

He can also admire how good Prompto looks, focused like that. One can tell that he’s truly in his element– his profile is at once strict and open, from the furrow of his brow as he squints his eyes, to the little bit of pink tongue that sticks out by way of his intense concentration. His finger hovers over the shutter with a light pressure, only pressing down when he’s certain he has a shot he’s proud of.

In that little mental cabinet of traits Ignis has been compiling about Prompto, he’s added several things. Competent. Daring. Attractive. And as he watches the man fumble around his camera to change filters with a sort of finesse that’s just unfailingly him Ignis adds another trait. 

Cute.

“…..Ignis?”

Ignis blinks and suddenly Prompto is looking at him, frowning in that concerned way of his.

“Yes?”

“You okay? Kinda zoning out there, buddy.”

Zoning out? He can’t recall doing anything of the sort, but that’s the thing. He can’t recall anything of the last few moments, really, outside of Prompto’s studious visage, burned into his memory. His sun-warmed cheeks, soft hair, pretty eyes–

“Ignis…? Ignis!”

Oops. Once again.

“Yes, yes, I heard you the first time. I’m fine, Prompto.”

Prompto levels him with a strange look, something part concern and part… something Ignis can’t gauge. “Um… did you wanna head back? I’m pretty much done now…“

Guilt prickles at the back of Ignis’ mind. How long had he been out it, for Prompto to be done already? He clears his throat. “If you wish.”

Prompto gives a small smile, picking himself up from the ground. “Good. Let’s get out of here before–”

A rustling in the bushes around them interrupts the calm air, causing the two of them to whirl around in alarm. From his peripheral Ignis can see the herd of Arba in the field beyond all snap to attention, long heads pointed at a spot beyond them, into the thick of trees. Next to him Prompto scrambles to his feet, putting away his camera as quickly and quietly as he possibly can. Ignis settles into a crouch, fingers itching at his side.

Out of the trees there’s a loud series of growls, and not seconds later they jump out– a large pack of Voretooths – snarling and rushing for the Arba. They’re not as big as the Arba but with their sharp claws and large jaws they’re able to get the jump on the other animals quite quickly. Within mere moments the relatively peaceful scene they were just privy to becomes a clash of jaws and claws and painful screeching.

Prompto makes a sound crossing between hurt and surprised, so Ignis grabs his shoulder, starting to pull him away from the scene. He whispers carefully, “we best move now, before we’re noticed.”

Barely nodding, the man follows him. They begin to make their way back, quickly but covertly navigating the thick grasslands they traveled through before. A few moments and it even seems like it works, like they’d managed to avoid being swept up into battle. But fate has it’s way of making things as difficult as possible, as Ignis has come to realize.

It’s the only explanation for the three Voretooth, stragglers from their pack, blocking their exit. Either fate has a ridiculous sense of humor, or Ignis has managed to accumulate some terrible karma somewhere down the line.

“No choice then,” Ignis says, summoning his polearm and holding it tightly in his hands. “Looks like we’re in for some impromptu training today as well.”

“Fine by me!” Prompto says in that cute little way of his, falling into step behind Ignis with his pistol already poised.

Yeah. Fate is quite the conniving fiend. 

[writesandramblings]

The Captain’s Secret - p.7

“Bites the Hand That Feeds”

A/N: Two chapters in one day! What can I say, the fact that everything they do in the show feeds so perfectly into my fanfic is really very inspiring. When Lorca said "fortune favors the bold," I about lost it, since I titled one of the chapters "Fortune Favors the Brave."

Also very happy that Lorca and Cornwell's relationship is as I expected, because that means I can proceed with the Cornwell stuff I had planned with only very minor adjustments. So, you can expect to see more of Cornwell down the line... For now, please enjoy some total adventure time instead!

Full Chapter List << 6 - Out of Bounds 8 - The Illusion of Choice >>

Carver parked the shuttle between the two little hillocks with ease, and though this wasn't quite enough to shield it completely from view, it was better than leaving it totally exposed. Dartaran homesteads were large by design and being parked far at the remote edge of two such estates lessened the chances of discovery considerably.

"All right, Carver, you know the drill. Anyone gets within a klick, you take this puppy up and keep out of trouble until we make contact. We can worry about extraction when the time comes, so long as you're still around somewhere to pick us up."

Carver flashed Lorca a smile that practically shone against the dusky tan color of her skin. She really was quite pretty. "You can count on me, captain."

"I don't doubt it. Rest of you, on me."

As they approached the barrier of Margeh and T'rond'n's estate, the difference was profound.

From the air, the hunters' domain was visibly much greener, carpeted with trees and other plants, but from the ground, it looked even denser. Layers of foliage dotted with flowers and growths of various colors were visible over the wall.

The wall itself consisted of two components: a concrete base that rose three and a half meters from the ground and an energy barrier generated by a system of poles and suspended wires rising another five meters from the concrete. The energy barrier had a faint hum at a distance that became more and more uncomfortable on approach. Not only was the barrier designed to keep prey inside, it was also designed to repel them by various means so they wouldn't approach in the first place.

Lorca winced and covered his ears. Russo seemed to be taking it especially bad, visibly reeling, and Billingsley looked disgusted.

Noticing the discomfort of her human companions, Lalana slowed her step and gripped her hands tightly together. "I am sorry, I did not know it was like this. I did not leave the house area."

"It's fine," grimaced Lorca, but Billingsley was glaring daggers at him and Lalana. "Russo, Morita, Lalana, you can hang back."

"Oh, this does not bother me," said Lalana, and continued forward with Lorca and Billingsley. Morita also proceeded forward, but only to grapple up the ladder so that Billingsley could reach the technological components of the wall to disarm the section. Then Morita joined Russo back at a more comfortable distance and scanned around with her rifle at the ready.

Billingsley opened her tool box. Her tools were packed in some foam. She ripped off two chunks, wet them in her mouth to soften them, stuck them in her ears, and wrapped her scarf around her head for good measure.

"May I?" asked Lorca, indicating her tool box.

"Fine," she said sharply.

The foam helped a bit, but even softened with saliva, it was a bit scratchy. Lorca put a hand on the ladder to steady it just in case.

"You don't have to be here," Billingsley said, taking hold of a ladder rung just above her head.

"I put you in this, don't make me regret coming over here to help."

With the rest of the crew standing out of earshot while she suffered through the pain, Billingsley felt emboldened to speak her mind. "Next time you want me for an away mission, don't. Just, don't." She proceeded up the ladder.

"Exactly why did you join Starfleet?" Lorca shot after her, but she either didn't hear him over the noise and the foam, or ignored the question.

After a few moments, she called down for a synchronic meter. Lorca located it in her toolbox and passed it up to her. Lalana sat on her haunches next to them, watching attentively.

Billingsley worked carefully but quickly, as eager to get the job finished as she was to do it right. There was a crackling sound. The faint energy glow on both sides of the pole she was working at flickered and went off. So too did the sound from those sections, lessening its intensity, though the painful buzzing continued from the adjacent sections so it wasn't completely gone.

Billingsley started down the ladder, hyperspanner in hand. "I've rerouted the power to bypass these two—"

Her foot slipped through the ladder as she stepped down and she tumbled backwards into the air. She didn't scream, there wasn't time, but for a moment she saw her hands stretched out into the sky towards nothing and panic swept over her like a rushing tide.

She squeezed her eyes shut as she landed, the air rushing out of her on impact, but instead of the hard ground beneath her spine, she felt like the ground had given way. She opened her eyes.

Lorca's face was inches from Billingsley's. One arm was around her back, the other under her knees. He looked mildly bemused. "Chief."

Horrified, Billingsley squirmed and he let her down. Jittery and embarrassed, she practically jumped away, almost stumbling over her own toolbox for good measure. She quickly tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear.

"You're welcome," said Lorca. Billingsley was still too shocked to say anything. Normally, Lorca would have thought this reflected yet another defect of her character, but in this instance, he let it slide. She was very clearly still processing what had just happened to her.

"That was very impressive," said Lalana. "You really are very adept at saving people."

Morita and Russo arrived with their gear. "Up and over," Lorca told them. "Carefully. We can't afford to lose anyone."

Morita went first and extended the ladder down the far side of the wall, then helped Russo raise and lower his equipment. Billingsley's toolbox went next, followed by Lalana, who ignored the ladder and simply hopped up the wall and then down the other side with ease.

Billingsley hung back. "Captain, I..."

"You usually wear magboots and gloves, don't you?" asked Lorca. "Because you grew up in high-G?"

Billingsley's eyes widened. Her cheeks reddened. She hadn't thought Lorca paid that much attention to the people on the Triton, especially given how everyone knew the assignment was only temporary until the Triton's upcoming decommission. "Yes, sir, but... it's no excuse."

"Could've happened to anyone, high-G or no. You think you can get up there again?"

"Yes, sir." She went to the ladder again.

"And, Sarah?"

Hearing her first name, her hand tightened on the ladder. "Sir?"

Lorca's face seemed much gentler. Kind, even. "I'll be right behind you."

Billingsley hastily turned away. "... Thank you, sir." She went up the ladder and Lorca followed right behind her.

The jungle was lush and full of life. Everywhere they looked, plants and animals abounded. Strange bird and bat creatures darted through the air, while whooping sounds emerged from distant trees that might have come from some kind of bird, or perhaps something like a monkey. There were flowers and fruits of every color imaginable and insects lazily buzzed through the air.

It would have been heaven to a biologist or botanist, but since they had neither in their little party, the richness of the living tapestry was somewhat wasted on them. Arzo would have liked it, Lorca thought. But they weren't here to catalogue new and unknown forms of life, they were here to complete a very specific mission.

Lalana took to these surroundings like a fish to water. She leapt into the trees almost at once and ran across the branches above them, pulling off leaves and flowers and fruits and berries with her tongue to snack on as they advanced. She even snapped a few bugs out of the air.

Morita took point while Lorca brought up the rear. Both knew better than to let their guard down around such beauty. Both the undergrowth and canopy were so thick, there was no telling what was hiding even two meters away from them. Billingsley's tricorder was next to useless in this situation. There were simply too many living things for it to provide any sort of information on lurking dangers.

On the plus side, the abundance of lifesigns also provided cover for them. Even if someone had been looking or known about their intrusion, it would have been very hard to find them.

Though they had chosen the barrier wall closest the house, it was still a decent walk. Margeh and T'rond'n's tract of land extended so far, Lalana had used the travel time on foot as part of the planning for her escape, and Lorca now fully appreciated why.

Lalana suddenly landed in their midst from a branch a good six meters above them, colored green as the trees. "Sliggen!" she exclaimed, practically bouncing. "Get into the trees!"

"What's a sli—"

There was a faint rumbling nearby. Deciding it didn't really matter what a sliggen was, they rushed towards the nearest trees with any footholds, handholds, or branches within reach and began to climb. Lorca practically hauled Billingsley up with him, mindful that she had the least climbing experience and was most likely to fall. Russo struggled to draw his equipment up into the trees, too, but Lalana smacked him with her tail. "Leave it!"

The rumbling turned into a mini-stampede very quickly and something like a giant centipede burst out from the undergrowth, snapping four giant mandibles into the air. It was almost as big around as a human, about twice as long, and thundered across the ground on more than fifty pointy legs that looked razor-sharp. They struck the ground with such rapid force there was a sharp thudding sound, and this sound multiplied by the quantity of legs produced quite a noise. Its forelegs were four times as long as the legs it walked upon and even sharper-looking.

Lalana was still on the ground. She jumped, very quickly, away from the tree Russo was climbing and landed heavily on the ground some distance away. The sliggen immediately whipped towards her and charged, but she was already up into the air and into the branches of the nearest tree, stomping her feet as she did.

Undeterred, the sliggen rushed up the tree trunk, slithering around it like a snake in Eden. Lalana did not stop for even a moment. She ran across the branch she was on and leapt clear through the air, soaring across the small clearing and into Billingsley and Lorca's arboreal refuge. "Sliggens hunt by ground vibrations," said said. "They are very aggressive and sometimes come to the house. The only thing worse than a sliggen is..."

Something roared with such strength, the trees shook around them. The multitude of large insects and flying creatures that had been present in the area seemed to have vanished.

The sliggen, which had moments earlier seemed hungry and murderous, now seemed terrified. It twisted around the tree in such confusion, it ended up trying to walk over itself. It hastily slithered down to the ground.

Giant footsteps pounded and shook the earth. The sliggen splayed its many legs out in confusion, disoriented as its primary method of navigation became untenable.

The creature that burst into the clearing was enormous. Lorca thought it to be about the size of an elephant, but had never actually been in the presence of an elephant, so wasn't entirely sure. Four-legged and covered in shaggy black-brown fur, the creature was shaped sort of like a yak or bison, with shoulders far more massive than its haunches, but with its head set almost flat into those same shoulders rather than protruding forward. You wouldn't think something of its size could navigate a jungle of this density, but it was built like a battering ram. It didn't move through the jungle so much as bash its way through any obstacles with a long trail of trampled trees and plants behind it.

"I'm going to go out on a limb and say that," said Lorca.

"Captain!" hissed Billingsley, aghast at his propensity to make a joke given the danger of the situation.

"Ssss!" Lalana hushed them.

The creature rose up on its hind legs and brought its front legs down on the sliggen with such force, it liquified the sliggen in two places. Dark purple goo splashed out across the ground. The intact sections of the sliggen writhed and twitched death throes.

But the monster wasn't done. It wasn't enough that it had killed the sliggen. It began prancing around on the sliggen's body repeatedly, seemingly just for the joy of watching the sliggen's innards paint the ground. It stomped and stomped until the sliggen was nothing more than eggshell fragments and purple paste.

The creature did not leave the clearing immediately. It began wandering around, sniffing, and walked up to a leafy plant. It opened its mouth and began chomping down on the leaves.

Unbelievably, the monster was vegetarian.

They waited as it meandered around, eating leaves, butting its deep-set head against trees for some reason. Wanton destruction? Dislodging of ripe fruit? Looking for companionship? Lorca had no clue. What he did know was that they needed this creature gone if they were ever going to continue, and it seemed unwilling to leave on its own.

He signaled Morita. They both raised their phaser rifles.

"Wait!" said Lalana, but too late.

Their shots hit the monster squarely in its haunch. Neither gun was set to kill; the goal had been to drive the thing away with a smack on its rump. Unfortunately, this was not how it reacted. It whirled about, bellowing so loudly everything shook again, and charged.

It hit the tree Lorca, Lalana, and Billingsley were in with such force, the tree groaned and tilted. Billingsley wrapped her arms and leg around the branch they were on with a shriek and Lorca barely managed to keep both his seat and his phaser rifle.

The creature backed up.

"Aim for the eyes!" said Lalana.

Lorca got off a shot just before the creature hit the tree again, hitting near an eye, but not directly in it. The creature hit the tree again with such impact it knocked the rifle from Lorca's hands. The rifle's strap was around Lorca, so it didn't fall far, but the tree shifted another five degrees and he was unable to get hold of the rifle while holding on to the tree for dear life. Additionally, though his rifle had been set to kill, the creature seemed entirely undeterred by its wound.

Morita managed a better shot as the creature backed up for a third go. The eye she hit burst and dribbled milk-white liquid down the creature's face. This drew its attention to the tree she and Russo were in, which was much smaller. When the creature charged them, it knocked their tree almost halfway down.

"Draw it's attention!" said Lalana, whipping Lorca's rifle back into his hand with her tail.

Precision was impossible, but also unimportant. Lorca fired off three shots in rapid succession, hitting the creature in its massive shoulder and successfully returning its attention back to the bigger tree. It charged them again. Lorca let out an involuntary shout as the impact reverberated up the tree and into his shoulder. Billingsley sobbed.

The creature took a step backwards, preparing for another charge. Lalana dropped from the tree onto its shaggy shoulder.

Feeling something land on it, the creature immediately bucked, but Lalana flattened herself against its back, the tendrils of her epithelial filaments grabbing hold of its fur like a thousand million tiny velcro hooks. It bucked again and again, each time pounding its massive, flat feet into the ground with tremendous force, but to no avail. Lalana was attached to it as firmly as its own fur. It was like she was an extension of its own body.

Lalana seemed to slide across the creature towards its face. Her tail managed to find its way onto the creature's wounded eye. Then it disappeared into the eye, almost as if sucked inside.

The creature roared with even more fury and began to charge with Lalana clinging to its face. Lorca could only watch as the creature prepared to smash Lalana into paste against a tree trunk.

Half a dozen monstrous paces from its target, the creature shuddered and collapsed, its momentum flipping it over as Lalana scrambled free and leapt away. The creature thudded harmlessly against the intended tree trunk, dead.

Lorca realized he had been holding his breath and gasped. Beside him, Billingsley whimpered.

The humans carefully descended from their branches, glad to be back on solid ground again. Billingsley didn't make it very far. Her legs were like jelly from how tightly she had been clinging to the branch and she remained shaken, but otherwise she was fine. "Nice shot," Lorca said to Morita. Russo went to check the communications equipment. It had gotten thrown aside when the creature hit the smaller tree, but was carefully-packed and intact.

Lorca and Morita joined Lalana beside the creature. Lalana's tail vibrated, expelling the creature's ocular fluid in a cloud of white mist. Morita nudged it with the tip of her rifle. It was well and truly dead. "Its eyes are right next to its brain," offered Lalana in explanation.

Russo and Billingsley made their way over together, Billingsley leaning on Russo for support. They all stood around the carcass, awed. "What was it?" asked Lorca.

"A leskos," said Lalana. "From Fhtadero III."

Part 8

[xottzot]

2017-12(DEC)-01st---Friday--NEWS item about local Midland TERRIBLE road traffic.

2017-12(DEC)-01st---Friday--NEWS item about local Midland TERRIBLE road traffic.

NEWS:---------- Resident slams road safety on ‘Midland Mad Mile’

https://thewest.com.au/news/wa/resident-slams-road-safety-on-midland-mad-mile-ng-b88677381z

What is VERY suprising, is that ANY 'local' NEWS actually made it onto the above NEWS site in the first place.

The NEWS article is of a stretch of Great Eastern Highway, Midland, Western Australia, (however in reality), it's only one small part of the entire terrible areas of major roads, and roads all about this hellhole region that has become so VERY terrible with it's CONSTANT heavy traffic, and the manner in which it was all designed to be so VERY TERRIBLE by the roads departments and the Swan Shire Council......but in the article you'll NEVER EVER see anything stated about the Swan Shire Council and ALL the terrible trafic and traffic crashes and bad incidents is merely blamed on drivers. Drivers that are FORCED to use the damn roads and navigate all the shittyness that was allowed and engineered and known would come about MANY MANY years beforehand

They KNEW all this was going to be like this.

AND...it's going to get WORSE.

The article (planted?) is also a 'softening up the public' action I assume for FURTHER massive additional road works to begin. (long since been planned for) - And those roadworks will add further still to the mayhem of traffic and shit. It will also become ANOTHER avenue for criminals to traverse and travel into other areas close and far, perform crime and scurry back into their hiding holes...using the so very convenient roads everyone has made and interlinked for them.

They even are able to have jobs in the entire shit. And people wonder why the lowest common demoninator level of worker is employed. Just like the ones further along that highway closer to Mundaring which have caused so much grief and anguish and anger to all businesses and people and became NEWS, but carefully controlled NEWS.

And the stretch of Great Eastern Highway in Midland that THIS article is about, COMPLETELY fails to talk about ANYTHNG other than one tiny topic that has ben specifically chosen to be bland and can be blamed on 'anonymous bad drivers'. - The facts are so VERY much different than the shit they want you to blindly accept.

Firstly, they actively ALLOWED all the heavy build up of commercial businesses and so on in that stretch of Great Eastern Highway Midland (and all throughout each side of Midland), knowing full well the increase of traffic it would engender and all the associated problems and dangers. All the houses of people everwhere were demolished and uprooted and threw away all the people that made Midland such a nice place, friendly, and prosperous and welcoming to all including those coming in from the outer country areas of Western Australia to shop and do business of all kinds. Midland's slogan at that time actually promoted the idea of all that friendliness, but they only did it for commercial reasons, and to further make money and expand.

Midland became bloated. - So what did the council do? - It simply entirely shifted all focus on people shopping to Midland Gate shopping centre and allowed it to be built and create an additional 'heart of Midland'. - But that wasn't enough. So they blocked off Midland itself from traffic. That didn't work to kill Midland. So they tried again, this time by actually allowing construction of a big building ON THE ROADS where traffic used to flow through 'old' Midland.

Still that wasn't enough of having destroyed the warm welcoming Midland that everyone knew. So Midland Gate shopping centre was created and it swallowed up streets and peoples homes. And STILL that wasn't enough. - They then soon expanded and grew larger and more widespread. Recently the Midland Gate shopping centre has AGAIN been massive works and expansion going on AGAIN. - So desperate are they to grow larger, that they actually are building where their customers use to park their cars. And the customers park their cars in places where other stores once existed but were destroyed by Midland Gate. - Fliss knows this herself for dearest 'Matey' our much loved very dear dog was obtained from a shop there as a puppy, and he was for dear Fliss because she was suffering so terribly with all her mental and physical afflictions. Matey financally cost me all my money in the meagre bank at that time. I only told that Fliss long afterwards of course to protect her from ever having any guilt or further burden upon her troubled psyche.

All that attracts more traffic. All the traffic attracts vehicles from all manner of places. And still more measures are taken with roads to ALWAYS try to facilitate Midland Gate, at the expense of all others, including local businesses which they themselves shoved out peoples homes for them to be constructed.

They've even allowed to be contructed a service station selling petrol and adding to all the traffic. THAT service station location now totally REPLACES a previous business (besides others) that was a vehicle tyre business that sold and serviced/repaired all manner of tyres including heavy trucks. - THAT service station adds a HELLUVA lot of traffic going into and out of it...or at least traffic TRYING to for the customers soon find out for themselves how TERRIBLE it is to access or leave especially from Great Eastern Higway itself. They of course then flood out and travel all through OTHER roads because the service station has been designed that way and the powers-that-be KNOW will affect so many other areas all around...but it's all according to plan. - Despite the scarcity and high price of vehicle fuel, and the close proximities of other service stations, there is now MORE petrol stations along that stretch of Great Eastern Highway (stretching from Bellevue and into Midland, with even MORE constantly being battled against by residents (including commercial 'residents' from being built), but there is NO service stations in Midland itself because the land has been taken over by other shit and built upon and profited from. -- There is no 'VISION' other than to keep making money at all costs. And least of all is caring about damn people.

One other aspect of the huge shitty mess, is the Swan Council's blind obedience to regulations and design to suit their own ends and greed and that is they stipulate that all the businesses must have vehicle parking for customers. And it's designed so that the parking is out front of the businesses themselves. That then makes the actual building housing the retail or service business is set right back AWAY from the road (Great Eastern Highway).

And so you drive along the highway NOT being able to find the places you may want and forever looking for signs telling of the businesses. Of course you are expected to do this whilst driving in TRAFFIC, so taking your eyes AWAY off the traffic around and about you as you frantically keep looking for signs. Signs that the council of course makes money on with licensing and including in the businesses rates and controlling to limit their actual readability as they jostle for drivers attention with all the forests of signs on poles forever increasingly screaming out to get your attention to come to them.

So drivers go along, miss where they want to go, anddor desperatly are looking for somewhere to pull into so they can turn around and go back there if they have already passed it. - This massive slamming of drivers attention when driving is of course NOT mentioned in the NEWS article. Some flippant ignorant remark however does qualify in the article.

When constructed, the buildings and structures where the businesses are built VERY OFTEN have their complete driveways sealed completely OFF from the Great Eastern Highway itself, forcing people to not only find a busines in the first place, but to then try to find out how to actually GET to the damn place. You are often forced to enter a common driveway located from a street that the council hasn't already shut off, and that driveway is supposed to service multiple businesses with one large connected carpark at the front of them against Great Easten Highway in multiple clumps of businesses all hidden about. When you eventually find a carpark if you are lucky, for the owners and workers themselves have to park their vehicles somewhere too, you have to drive along in carparks trying not to have a vehicle accident or to run over anyone and you eventually park, then get out and walk about dazed by being unable to find yor chosen store because all the signage is situated close to the Great Eastern Highway end of any development with all their parking always out front next to the highway, the highway with the massively streamning traffic like a flood constantly flowing along with it full of all manner of vehicles and trucks and everything else. (I haven't even mentioned yet the massive amount of constant vehicle exhaust fumes constantly in the air all about oppressive and to breath and which makes walking intolerable).

If you're now on foot but the place you want is across the other side of the highway, you REALLY DO take your life at risk in crossing the Great Eastern Highway on foot, like an ant in a stampede of elephants speeding rapidly along...again with other people including those all looking around trying to find where to go and how to get there.

AND......if all of this is still not enough to convince everyone NOT to go to ever go these places, there's even MORE traffic all added into the area because people have no choice but to innocently use the highway to get to locations further along Great Eastern Highway such as Mundaring and beyond, places themselves suffering all the same shit because far flung scattered 'estates' of cheaper affordable housing has been constructed and which people have had to make their homes in. Places that are like islands of humanity marooned and left to fend for themselves...all of which is despite touted as being an 'attraction' to living there and of 'getting away from it all'.

Of course the NEWS article does NOT mention ANY of that, and yet it ALL IS CONNECTED and is respnsible for the very things they are touting in their article.

The businesses eventually die. Fliss saw that herself going on. We used such places ourselves but of those there is MORE that will soon be dying and dead. She thought not much of it until very nice people running businesses were forced out of business by everything, including Midland Gate. Those businesses either were totally gone, or became places where you didn't want to return, especially with the manner of how you had to struggle to get there itself and then get away from. -- And so 'new' Midland kept expanding and taking up places along the highway and adding to all the stuff in the NEWS article.

Then, (I've forgotten to mention), there is the fast-food places.......Mc Donalds, Burger King (Hungry Jacks it used to be), Kentucky Fried Chicken (aka KFC), pizza places, and on and on. - All that was perfectly fine but they have remained in those same places despite all the terrible traffic shit, and only see remaining there as 'exposure' to remain there and continue to be part of it all.

One of the photos in that NEWS article I instantly recognised and so would dear Fliss. It's of a vehicle having been forced to wait on the Great Eastern Highway in order to turn down a street and go into Mc Donalds or the pizza stores....and then as ALWAYS you are marrooned waiting on the highway waiting to turn through endldess oncoming traffic.....and if somebody else opposite you wants to turn to the other side of the highway as they themselves battle the constant streams of traffic, suddenly the multi lanes of traffic becomes a single lane of traffic each way, (THAT leads to vehicle crashes as Fliss well knows herself). And THAT then adds to all the shit because once again it creates an unbroken stream of traffic ths time funnelled into one lane you are supposed to impossibly get through as the unbroken stream there now travels bumper to bumper.

And so when a waiting driver sees a gap in traffic, they seize uopn it and use it and drive through at speed (as is shown in a photo without explanation in the NEWS article), and this also can be VERY dangerous, literally life threatening, as vehicles with drivers who have become impatient and enraged at everything I have already stated, will be so harried and desperate they will get 'tunnel vision', and they get hounded at and jeered and abused at by vehicles behind them for 'holding up traffic' (I'm NOT joking), and so they try to get through....all adding to the chaos.

All this goes on ALL THE TIME.

Now consider adding even more shit to it all.......Police with sirens on demanding everyone get out of their way as they rush to attend more crime, more vehicle accidents, and to travel to places where the Police are needed (such as here at this hellhole) ....add to that fire engines....add to that taxi drivers......add to that commerical vehicles....add to that big trucks coming from or going to the east side of Australia with goods......add to that motorcyclists......add to that very slow moving BICYCLISTS who are constantly moving out from the kerb to avoid running across big road drains that can throw them from their bikes just as it can also do to motorcyclists (I long ago stopped riding motorbikes for some of these very reasons)............add to that pedestrians crossing the busy Great Eastern Highway and having to stand in the MIDDLE of all this traffic as they try to run across and not get killed (again I have suffered this countless times and so did dear Fliss to some degree), and everytime it is lethally a great risk...hence as a driver you try to park on the SAME side of the highway ANYWHERE and then walk great distances in all weathers to get to where to need to go but be forever only on one side of the highway.

And also adding to all this, is that Bunnings (a hardware and materials place for consumers) is ALSO part of it all the area, and AGAIN has out-front parking for a great many vehicles. But Bunnings too have bee making their carparks smaller by allowing things to be built and exist IN the previously accesible capark. And trying to go INTO or OUT of Bunnings is just as dangerous because of the high volumes of traffic, and peoples wants and needs to turn where they need to go. - Again, nothing of this is stated in the NEWS article.

Are you getting the idea that the NEWS aticle is a planted article yet? Andor is being VERY selective in NOT mentioning VERY relevant things? -- THAT newspaper, the West Australian newspaper, relies upon advertising for reveue, and so is GREATLY influenced by not antagonising in any way whatsoever anything that advertisers or associated businesses paying them doesn't want to be made public.

And if you think that all the out-front parking is bad, getting out and away from them is just as bad and can create LETHAL situations as drivers try to find gaps in the 4 lane highway and get away. - AGAIN, this is something the NEWS atricle completely fails to mention.

And the aticle never stated how almost completely IMPOSSIBLE it is at any time to cross from one side of the Great Eastern Highway to the other unless you have to wildly alter your driving course and in order to struggle to get to intersections with traffic lights....and THEY have lethal conditions as well.

And throughout all of this shit.....is king Midland Gate shopping centre.....who will supopsedly make ALL your shopping easier and cheaper (it doesn't) and with limited goods from merchants stores who have to be utterly mercilous in trying to maintain profits to cover their shopping centre ransom high rents. --- AND......you ALSO have to struggle to get into and out of Midland Gate from the roads....ALL of this adding to all the shit. And that's not mentioning the rampant roaming criminals constantly in the Midland Gate carparks and shopping centre itself.

And there WILL be MORE traffic added into everything. - It's been proudly proclaimed and forecasted and being (poorly) planned once again.

Midland is now WORSE than places dear Fliss and I would always avoid and travel distances together to shop for anything in 'shopping expeditions', made worse with the damned killing heat of Western Austalia and the ever worsening drivers.

And other places such as Helena Valley and Swan View and elsewhere are very quickly becoming the same and AGAIN attracting all the shit....AND all the criminals both local and roaming to and from.

And the Western Australian Police run around and try to deal with everything......and can't.

And the nameless authorities run around and try to deal with everything......and can't and don't care about anyone except who they are contracted to service.

And pizza deliveries to-your-door has been joined by all manner of stuff to-your-door, that's if you can simply afford it all. (I cannot, and a great many others are the same). - And the criminals hunt down those people who try to avaial themselves of those services.

And then there has been the education facilities that have been demolished andor stopped from being schools. They either became temporary 'community' services places but are always demolished to make way for more lucrative reources for developers such as still MORE shops........and that also applies to the Swan Districts Hospital which is no more.....the ambulance stations which are no more (one was demolished and became a liquor store selling booze until it was closed down and still is closed down).......has the Midland fire brigade station also become a victim of all this? That location too is/was on Great Eastern Highway and is right in the thick of all that traffic in the NEWS article.

EVERYTHING has become worse, was encouraged to become worse, and GETS WORSE........and IS getting WORSE.......and I do mean EVERYTHING........

Oh!, and at just after 8am in these streets of HELL where I am, an illegal unlicensed offroad motorcycle has just gone along on the streets and further into Koongamia. The rider had a black? helmet and wore a black backpack. - And of course Police will not be about or doing anything about it and everything, just as nothing ever gets done. --- ALL THIS has happened before, it's happening again, the same shitty things and events, situations and hell of criminality and it's Summer. Welcome to shitty summer at this fucking hellhole. - And then the motorbike tore back along the streets at 8:26am. - Once more, no Police. And the criminals count on that. And they use this hellhole area as an interlink area and means to go from one place to another, as well as doing crime at this hellhole area itself.

And kids are brought up to be criminals along with it all and slot right into it all.

I rarely write about the damn HEAVY aircraft traffic for Perth Airport in this blog but it is SO TERRIBLY BAD, just as the Great Eastern Highway that they fly over and past.

I've only had 2 hours sleep today, and all that was terribly broken. I only got up because dear Sam and dear Max needed to go outside for their dog ablutions.

Last night there was loud banging and thumping, like somebody hitting a metal object, over and over and over and over again for around half and hour late at night in the darkness at Fatguts abo criminal household.

Then came the noise of heavy traffic on Great Eastern Highway mixed with the noise and shit of VERY HEAVY aircraft traffic flying above this hellhole from Perth Airport.

All this shit (not just the planes) NEVER existed when dear Fliss was here with me. It has been allowed and encouraged to constantly grow and become worse and to make life shit and hell and for people to struggle to live.

In late 2015, dear Fliss had a breakdown and fled to somewhere in Tamworth, New South Wales Australia, she invited me to join her in a new life together. But then ALL communications with dear Fliss suddenly stopped and I have been left in this fucking hell. And then I got all the blame for EVERYTHING from soembdy don't even know or have ever met or has ANY idea or accepts ANYTHING about ANYTHING with dear Flissa and I.

I WILL BE SO VERY GLAD TO BE DEAD, but instead what I really hope and pray for is to be far away from this hellhole to be with dear Fliss just as she promised us both for she said that her mind had broken by all the hell.

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To dear Cath oF Queensland, you live in a place that was so much like what HERE used to be, but I suspect it too has become so heavily built up and changed to be nothing like it once was and has become worse. - Now...imagine yourself being without any family and friends alive whatsoever, that your husband and children have been taken from you and kept from you.......imgaine all that hell happening to you and STILL you would not be bale to imagine the hell I am in by not being with dear Fliss, Felicity Ann Carthew, of Tamworth, New South Wales, Australia. - You dear Cath have had troubles, to say the least, but you have had support and love from your immemdiate family and relations. -- I have been left totally ALONE without dear Fliss and left to die, when I have done nothing to ever warrant that at all. And dear Fliss herself said she and I would ALWAYS stay in contact with me as she was getting better....but dear Fliss HAS NOT.

So dear Cath, have a Merry Xmas and tell Fliss I so very much love her and want so very very much to be with her just as she promised us.

I am in great pain.

I love you dear Fliss and want to be with you.

[hellsingmongrel]

No no, it didn’t come off as transphobic to me, because I also wondered about that whole scene when I first realized just how much the trans theory worked.  There were so many signs to indicate that it might have actually been intentional from the onset of the series (the boys having really long hair and getting it cut into boy cuts as children in the old anime, Vash having some physical features that actually are more often seen in female characters than male characters (those eyelashes have driven me feral since the early 2000′s, I kid you not) the fact that all of the other plants you see, period, are girls unless you see that one single specific possibly-not-canon character in Multiple Bullets, and then The Twins are the only boys.  Nightow apparently making comments in the past that Vash’s Angel Arm was feminine in form for a reason, and some of the people on the cast of Stampede saying that Vash was literally meant to be the male and female lead of the show in one character, and the early concept art of him as a child looking very much like a typical depiction of a cute little girl.

But then the Eriks scene was sitting there like “Yeah, but-...???”  And one scene of Vash using a urinal also made me stop and go “.....Hmmmm???” but that’s just when my brain was like “No, but see, they’re not human, they’re a different species altogether, so it’s probably more comparable to intersex than trans.”  But yanno, “trans” is just a quicker and more easily understood way of explaining that he’s not on the cis binary that humans would fall into, so I usually explain it that way.

And honestly, at the end of the day, before I knew as much about trans issues as I do now, back before I realized I was a form of trans, I had no idea what I was seeing with all of these things, so I would have been just as confused as you were.  lol  I usually don’t look for trans or non-cis headcanons in my favorite characters unless it’s explicitly spelled out because it’s just exhausting for me to try and find representation for people like myself when I know it won’t be true.  But man.  All the signs for Vash and Knives are just.  There.  And it makes me so happy and just shocks me so much that one of my favorite characters from all those years ago has been representation for me and people like me the whole time!  (And that’s not even touching on the fact that Vashwood is literally canon.)

Trigun manga spoilers under the cut!!

Ok, do not get me wrong. I LOVE everyones ideas about Vash and Knives plant anatomy/sex organs, but it must look somewhat normal? There was the whole scene when Erics (Vash) stripped naked and was barking like a dog to save Lina. If his ding dong looked unusual, I think they would have mentioned it.

I dunno, just been thinking about it at length lately.