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simplydozing · 3 months

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𝐁𝐥𝐨𝐨𝐝𝐲 𝐁𝐞𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐢𝐟𝐮𝐥 𝐘𝐨𝐮

Nameless Ghoulette Cumulus x Ghoul!Reader Shedding season always comes early for you. You don’t know why, but it’s the most painful thing you ever go through. Luckily for you, you have a whole squad that takes care of you during this time, one putting in extra effort than the rest. Word Count: 2253 || Ao3 Gender Neutral Pronouns for Reader Author's Interpretations Of Nameless Ghouls

It was that time of the year again, for you at least.

It was that time where you succumbed to pure agony. You would be put through the most excruciating pain just to shed the outer lining of your horns.

You never understood why. Why it hurts so bad, and why your shed time came a full season before the others.

Your horns are smaller than the others. They were the most common shape, jutting out from your hairline and curving upward to a small point. Could it be that the size affects your shedding?

Age didn't play an issue, you were as old as the others. You think there's something wrong with you, but they say it's natural and that you were fine. Maybe they're right, but it was something you couldn't shake off.

There was this one time where you collapsed on stage and you were sure to be sent back to hell for ruining the scene. But you woke up in the infirmary with the other ghouls surrounding you, one in particular holding your hand.

Cumulus was always the one to take extra care of you. She had this nurturing spirit about her. She was the first to get to know you upon your summoning, and you both grew close pretty quickly. She was the one to introduce you to the rest of your team.

It was definitely an interesting sight for the frontman, who you came to know as Papa Emeritus IV. All he saw was a pack circulating around you, taking in your scent and checking out the features you have. He was quite the character himself. She told you everything you needed to know about him and what to do.

She was the one who helped you find your talent for singing. Finding your “human” voice is a big deal for your kind. Ghouls don't talk like one could imagine, they use a sort of telepathy. It sounds like indistinct whispering, and they use small words and phrases. So when you heard her “voice”, it almost brought you to your knees.

Since then, you both have been inseparable.

Today, you're all practicing for the new songs the Emeritus wrote.

Or, you all were supposed to be. You didn't show up, and the rest were still waiting on you.

“What is taking so long?” The Emeritus broke the silence.

“Did I not say this was urgent?” He turned to the rest, throwing his arms up in an over exaggerated shrug.

They look around and stare at each other.

“ {y/n} unwell?”

“ where {y/n}?”

“is late, is never late.”

There were chirps and purrs coming from each of them while they questioned your whereabouts.

Cumulus was deep in thought about it. But then it hits after remembering what day it is.

She grabs her companion, Cirrus, by the sleeve. Cirrus tilts her head and twitches her nose.

“ know of {y/n}?” She asks.

“ {y/n} shed today,” Cumulus answers, distressed.

The others pick up on this, and immediately put their instruments down and go look for you.

The Emeritus jogs after them.

“Wait! What's going on?”

It's Dewdrop that stops in his tracks.

“ shedding,” he makes a pulling motion from his head where his own horns are positioned.

“Oh.” He raises his eyebrows, coming to the realization that you could literally be anywhere, and that brings a chill down his spine.

You once freaked him out when you were in the middle of this process. It was a late night, and he was just finishing up some paperwork when he decided to take a break and wander around to stretch everything out. He was not expecting any other person to be up, much less you. So when he sees you at the end of a darkened hallway covered in blood and the only source of light coming from your dimly glowing eyes, he books it right back to his office and slammed the door. He even blocked it off with a chair.

“Yes. Yes, okay. Go,” Emeritus pats the ghoul on the shoulder. Dewdrop nods, and flees to catch up with the others.

“And find them before they find me!” He calls out, shuddering when he thinks back to that one night.

Everyone splits up, covering more ground around the abbey. One checks the kitchen, another inspects the reading room. Mountain scours the cemetery, and Dewdrop searches the meeting room.

But you're nowhere to be found.

Cumulus is out in the garden area, chittering and clicking, making the sounds you can recognize her by. She was hoping to be the one to find you, knowing what to do with you and how to do it.

She looks under the benches. She rattles bushes. She pads around the various delicate flowers.

She can't find you, though.

The sound of dry leaves crunching under her feet grows more frantic. She's in a panic. You couldn't have gone far in your state.

All hope begins to fade as she comes to a halt, catching her breath while trying to think rationally.

You have these “go-to” spots, but all reported you weren't in any of them. Sometimes, you would get so overstimulated that you would find a new hiding area. But at the same time, you have a tendency to go astray. The pain would be so mind-numbing that you'd aimlessly drag yourself anywhere.

Sleepwalking, in a way.

Feeling defeated, Cumulus decides that the others have probably found you by now.

She surveys the area one last time.

She knows you haven't gone that far out, but she still squints at the treeline of the woods that hid the church. She sees the old conservatory.

Perhaps you found sanctuary there.

She hurries to the abandoned building, brushing away the stray brush and tall grass.

Your scent is getting strong. Thank Satan she chose to look around again.

On arrival, the first thing she noticed is the door that's slightly ajar.

The building itself is gorgeous. There's an entryway that's framed with stained glass windows telling the story of Lucifer's Great Fall. It leads to an even larger glass dome. Some of the glass is broken, and the whole thing is held together by rusted beams.

How could they let this breathtaking edifice go in such a vanquished state?

No matter, she could sit and gawk at it another time. Her top priority was you.

She shuffles through, and what she sees inside is incomparable to what is on the outside.

The dusking light passes through each panel. Each color seeps in, reds and oranges paint the cobblestone pathway. Dead rose bushes fill the stone troughs that lined the hall. There's a lot of weeds and shriveled leaves.

It was the definition of “hauntingly beautiful.”

She ambled through, taking in the sights.

It quite literally resembled hell.

She was so lost in this place that she didn't pay attention to the scuffling that was coming in close behind her.

Your vision is blurred. You are quite literally burning up, smoke evaporating off of you. Your lungs feel as if they've been strangled, leaving you to wheeze in what little air you can breathe.

Your head is killing you.

Emeritus scheduled one of the worst days for practice. You don't blame him, he just didn't know.

You came here to be alone. You didn't even know this place existed, but it was perfect.

The interior reminded you of home.

“Home.”

You could writhe up here the same way you would writhe down there.

It was isolated enough so you couldn't venture out around the abbey, and so that no one could easily find you.

No one was supposed to anyway.

You were jostled from your withering when you heard the door creak open. You lifted your head from your hands when you heard footsteps.

They were sparse, and some even dragged.

They were unrecognizable.

You struggled to pull yourself to your feet, rolling over and clawing your way up.

You had a hand in front of you to guide yourself.

There was another set of heavy wood doors connecting the actual greenhouse to the hall.

You braced yourself, and weakly heaved them open.

Through your heavy vision, you saw her .

Cumulus had her back turned to you. Her eyes were glued to the ceiling. You didn't dare follow her gaze, seeing as she was truly the most beguiling thing here.

You lurch forward, reaching for her.

“cumu….lus”

She whirls around.

And her eyes widen at the sight of you.

The lining of your horns are peeling, exposing chunks of the tender flesh that was protected by it. Blood poured down your face in dark red rivulets. Smoke flows around you, and your clothes are torn to shreds.

The worst part is how tired your eyes are.

You try to walk to her, but you're so fatigued that your eyelids droop and you start to fall.

You were prepared to hit the ground, but you were met with a warm softness.

She caught you, and was now holding you under your arms. Her hands clutched what fabric was left of your uniform.

She rubbed your back and eased you down so your head rested on her lap. You convulsed at her touch, hissing when she came too close to the base of your horns.

“ are hurt, why so far?”

You didn’t have the strength to answer her. Right now, all you wanted to do was sit in silence. “ can walk? ”

You shook your head. You’re too exhausted to move.

She lifts your head and spreads her legs out to get in a comfier position. Once settled, her claws itch at your scalp. She massages your head with slight pressure, which honestly feels so good given the circumstance.

You whimper and tiredly bring a hand up to her knee.

“ shh, are almost done ”

She rubs your temples, seeing as how the enamel continues to peel. You start shaking.

Cumulus is here for you. She doesn’t mind waiting for you . You’ve done the same for her a few times. She remembers being so embarrassed for you to see her in the same position you are, but you stayed by her side regardless.

She would take all this away from you if she could. Every ghoul has to go through this, sadly. It breaks her heart seeing anyone go through this. But it shatters seeing you go through it.

You white-knuckle the hem of her suit as your horns are at their final stage.

Your mouth is agape, but no sound comes out.

All you can do is hold onto your dear friend.

And she lets you.

She lets you dig your claws in her leg. She lets you scream and cry as loud as you need to. She lets you wipe the blood off on her clothes.

She lets you be vulnerable.

You're so tired, and you're in so much pain.

You pass out when the tips of them come undone.

“ rest easy, {y/n}, ” she strokes the side of your face.

She wishes she had more time with you like this, but you're both found by Mountain and Swiss.

You're both a bloody mess.

They don't question anything, they just help her carry you back to the church.

You wake up in the infirmary yet again, but this time, no one is around you. Although, you do feel a weight on your torso.

You look down to see none other than Cumulus resting her head on folded arms, fast asleep.

You smile and place a hand on her back.

Her eyes flutter open.

Seeing you're awake makes her sit upright.

“ are awake! how feeling? ” She clasps your hand in both of hers.

You reach up to touch your horns and find that they're wrapped in bandages. There's a slight buzz in your head.

“sorry for not remember .”

She looks away in shame.

You scoot up to her.

“no need,” you reply, taking her by the sides of her face to return her gaze to you.

“thanks for help. glad it was you.”

Her eyes sparkled, the reddish-brown hues paling as she leaned into your touch.

“ as well as i,” she brings a hand up to rest on yours, further pressing flush against her.

You kept this position for what felt like ages. You looked at her lovingly, and you want to say she reflected it.

“ are… are feeling same? ”

She finally put it into words.

There’s a theory that ghouls can feel emotions on a much deeper level than the average mortal, that they can feel it through a simple touch.

And with your hand on her cheek, it exclusively validates it into fact.

Your thumb grazes her soft lips.

And you then pull her in by the chin, taking one last glimpse in those hellish eyes of hers.

And you kiss her.

She squeaks happily. Her stomach flips and her heart skips a beat. You’re so warm, not overheating like you were. And you’re so unexpectedly tender, gentle even.

If she had a tail, it’d be wagging.

You recede from her, leaving her mouth partially gaping open.

“answer question?” You let out a breathless laugh.

She giggles and nods, bringing one of your hands up to plant a kiss in the palm of it.

“ not know half of it! ”

There’s a new scent to you, to both of you when you were given the ‘okay’ and discharged. No one questions either of you, but you best believe there was some gossip among the rest.

#♥︎#ghost the band #ghost band fanfic #ghost band #ghost band x reader #the band ghost #the band ghost x reader #the band ghost x you #ghost bc #ghost bc x reader #ghost bc x you #nameless ghoulette x reader #cumulus x reader #nameless ghouls #nameless ghoulettes #nameless ghoulette cumulus #cumulus ghoulette #cumulus ghost

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beansboop · 8 months

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after the tour - julien baker x reader

okay, so this is my first time writing for Julien. its just something small and was just an idea ive had in my head for a couple days. I know only a few people who write for Julien (i love their work) so I thought maybe I could start writing for her and even the other members of boygenius too! but anyways I hope this is good and I hope everyone who reads it enjoys it :)

summary - Julien has been on tour for a while now and all she wants to do is be with the person she loves most. you.

rating - none

warnings - literally just fluff. she/her pronouns. reader is younger (in college) not proofread.

word count - 800

It was still dark out when you first woke up. Some birds were chirping and you could hear the soft snores from the person lying next to you.

Julien. Your little body heater.

She was laying on her stomach with her arm thrown around you. Her face tucked in the back on your neck, her breath tickling you every time she exhaled.

You shuffled around until you were facing her. Admiring her relaxed face. She had just finished the tour with the boys and has been exhausted ever since she got home. All she wanted to do was crawl into your arms and go to sleep.

Which is exactly what she did last night.

The boys had just finished the last song of the night and the last show of the tour. You were backstage waiting for Julien, and the rest of them. Mostly Julien though. You weren’t able to go to every show sadly, you were in college and had to keep things going with yours and julien’s shared home. You guys facetimed and texted throught the day. You did go to some shows and were able to support them front row or back stage. But Julien felt bad cause she was always so tired after shows all she wanted to do was go to sleep. So she didn’t get to talk to you much or spend much time with you. But you understood completely. You loved Julien and your just happy to be together wherever it is and whatever you guys are doing.

Julien, Phoebe, and Lucy all came running back and collided into you with the biggest hug.

“you guys were absolutely incredible out there” you said before you quite literally ran out of breath from the bear hug.

They all laughed, phoebe and lucy went to go to their rooms to grab their stuff to bring to the tour bus leaving you and Julien alone. Julien just kept looking at you smiling.

“what are you looking at?” you smirked.

Julien laughed “im just looking at you.. ive missed you so much” she says wrapping her arms around your waist and kissing your forehead.

“me too,” you said sadly. “but were together now and we’ll be home soon and we can do whatever you want” you said, kissing the tip of her nose then her mouth.

“oh.. whatever I want huh” Julien smirked and raised her eyebrows. You chuckled and lightly smacked her cheek.

You rolled your eyes “ugh come on” you grabbed her arm and started dragging her towards her room to get her things.

For some reason you were wide awake and just thinking about random stuff. You were so in your head you didn’t even realise Julien had woken up.

“whatcha thinkin’ about baby?” she asked tiredly.

“just life. You, and me”

She smiled at that. “good thoughts I hope?”

“Yes, of course” you said, cupping her face with your hand and brushing hair out of her face.

Her eyes starting to close again.

You didn’t say anything for a couple minutes so she thought you had fallen back asleep. She pulled you closer to her so your face was in the crook of her neck. You both keeping eachother warm from the cool air.

“are you awake?” Julien asked softly.

You hummed

She didn’t say anything for a few seconds trying to think of a way to get this all out. “I know because of the tour I haven’t been able to talk to you much or be with you and im sorry. Ive been so stressed and tired lately I know I haven’t been making time to really be with you and when I am with you im just annoying cause im having to practice or talking with the band and im not giving you my full attention” she started rambling.

Now you were really awake.

“Julien” is all you said.

“you don’t have to explain yourself. I get it. Your stressed, anyone would be. eThis was one of your biggest tours and im so, so proud of you.” You exclaimed.

She started tearing up at your words. She really felt like she was such a bad girlfriend. But of course you would understand, that’s why she loved you so much.

“Im just so-“ you cut her off with your lips.

“stop saying sorry. You don’t have any reason to be sorry. Im not mad, I never was, In the slightest.” You kissed her again. This time slowly to make sure she really gets that your not upset.

You could never be upset at her.

Especially over something like this.

You rested your foreheads against each other and just laid with each other.

“I love you so much y/n. I mean it. You are it for me” Julien said.

She kissed you gently. “I love you Julien. Your it for me too.”

#julien baker x reader #boygenius #julien baker

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billsbabydoll · 2 months

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“𝒾 𝓁ℴ𝓋ℯ 𝓎ℴ𝓊 𝓂ℴ𝓇ℯ.”

contains:PURE FLUFF<3

summary:me and tom have been having a 2 year long friends with benefits relationship since he moved to LA, and I’d be lying if this hasn’t caused me to build real romantic feelings.today i decided to finally express these feelings, soon out finding i wasn’t the only one feeling them too.

WARNINGS:cringe fluff lol, friends with benefits, situationship, crush confession, kissing, new found relationship.

me and tom knew each other from various mutual friends who then later introduced us to each other once at a party, that night tom and me slept together and have been ever since for the last two years.

other then that me and tom had quickly grown closer and closer as time went on, we were best friends (who hooked up occasionally), we talked about everything, he even once told me if he didn’t marry anyone he’d just end up marrying me, which i mean i wouldn’t be complaining.

all the small flirting, the pet-names, the “casual fucking” was seemed completely meaningless to him, i wonder if he was just trying to play it cool like he always did.but to me it was far from meaningless and in reality it was really driving me crazy.he understood me as well i understood him, he made me feel things no other man had ever made me feel, i know it’s cheesy but he gave me butterflies.

everytime he would introduce me to his new girlfriend of the month i wished i was that girl, the jealousy and envy coursed through my veins every single time.that girl he was hugging, kissing, touching, calling “baby” should really be me.

today tom called asking if i wanted to go get some lunch and then watch the sunset at the beach, this was a common occurrence of ours so of course i quickly accepted.

tom soon came to pick me up, honking the horn of his car as a sign to “hurry the fuck up”.i quickly rushed out of the door, rushing into his vehicle closing the car-door as i sat down.

“hii schatzi.” he said in a sing-song voice with that same little smirk he always had, looking me up and down before beginning to pull out of my driveway onto the road.

“heyy tomm, where are we stopping for lunch?” i replied nervously trying to not be bothered by the use of his pet-name and the way he looked me up down.

“oh you know already where babe, your favorite obviously.” he replied nonchalantly as he continued driving his eyes focused on the road, unaware of the pink blush spreading across my cheeks.

i nodded with a small grin thinking to myself, “should i just tell him today, what if he doesn’t feel what im feeling too, what if he gets upset?” a billion what ifs filled my head.

after a few minutes of driving we finally arrived at my favorite restaurant here in town, he parked the car before getting out of the car first, coming to my side to open the door for me.i stepped out of the car with an appreciative smile as he shut the car door and took my hand in his, leading me inside the restaurant.he had already called and made a reservation so we were quickly seated, we were ushered to our booth by our waiter before sitting down tom on one side of the booth me on the other, the waiter then asked for our drink orders before slipping away.

the waiter later came back with our drinks placing them down, giving us a minute to settle in and to take a look at the menu, before coming back and taking our orders and quickly scurrying away.

“so how’s work been tom, you and bill still working on some new lyrics?”

“yeahhh, ive been going to bills place everyday trying to work on theses lyrics but me and him keep clashing so who knows if we’ll even finish a single fucking song.”he chuckled, looking down at his drink as he swirled the straw in the glass.

“how about you babe, you still at your miserable ass job?”

i sighed dramatically at the mention of my job it was hell and tom knew how much i hated it, it was quite literally hell on earth.

“yup unfortunately i swear that place is gonna be the death of me!” i joked with a smile tugging at the corners of my lips.

we continued catching up for a bit, until the waiter soon arrived back with our meals, placing them down on the table.we thanked the waiter before digging into our plates continuously conversating throughout the meal, laughing and joking like we always did.

after we finished eating tom insisted on paying like he always did, afterwards we made our way out of the restaurant back into his car.now driving towards venice beach making a quick stop at the gas station to pick up a pack of beer and some cigarettes.

now we were sitting on the sand, taking in the view of the pinkish orange sky, the birds flying above, the sound of the waves crashing against the shore.i could just stay here forever with him, but every fantasy has its reality and it was now or never if i wanted this future with him i had to say something.

“tom i need to tell you something..” i spoke up anxiously taking a huge swig of beer from my bottle trying to pump myself for what was to come, looking up slowly meeting his eyes.

“okay what’s up?”he answered curiously.

“i love you,i- i mean uhh..tom you mean everything to me and I know we’re just friends and when we hook up it’s just sex but i really like you and i’ve really tried to stop and i can’t!-”

suddenly my nervous rambling was stopped by his lips pressing against mine.the lips that i only kissed for sex were now kissing mine sweetly, slowly, and delicately.

he was first to pull away, looking into my eyes with awe and love.pushing a strand of my hair behind my ear before cupping the side of my cheek with his hand rubbing his thumb gently against my skin.

“i love you more.” he whispered his voice content and sincere a small grin growing on his lips.

“you dont know how fucking long i was waiting for you to say something baby.”he added.

i laughed not only feeling relieved that my feelings were reciprocated but happy he wasn’t upset nor angry!it felt as if a 100 pound weight has been lifted off her shoulders.

“why didn’t you say anything tom?!”

“i was scared of ruining the friendship!”

“YOU WERE SCARED?!”

“YES!”

we both continued laughing at each other and at the fact of us both being too afraid of each other’s rejection to confess to one another, sharing a couple more giggles and few kisses before tom then began to speak up again.

“so does this mean your my girlfriend now babe?”he asked with a tone of seriousness and anticipation.

“yeah if you stop bringing those “girlfriends of the month” around.”she replied a soft giggle escaping her lips, playfully placing a kiss on his cheek.

“you got it liebe.”

THE END

#tokio hotel #tokio hotel x reader #tokio hotel smut #tom kaulitz #tom kaulitz x reader #tom kaulitz smut #bill kaulitz #bill kaulitz x reader #bill kaulitz smut #georg listing #gustav schäfer

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askinkiskarma · 2 years

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The Archer | Chapter VII: Epiphany

Chapter I Chapter II Chapter III Chapter IV Chapter V Chapter VI Chapter VII Chapter VIII Chapter IX Chapter X

Summary: You and Neteyam fight for your lives and the lives of the people you both love, as the war with the humans finally comes to your doorstep.

Pairings: Neteyam x Avatar!Reader

Word Count: 10k words

Warnings/notes: angst (lots and lots of angst), mentions of death, blood, violence, cursing, spoilers (!!) for ATWOW

A/N: I APOLOGISE PROFUSELY.

Epiphany is the song that drove this whole series, it was the song that made me want to write The Archer, and the chapter that the song deals with is finally here. I feel incredibly sad at the thought of this series ending in a couple of chapters, as it has been literally the only thing on my mind since I started it, more than 2 months ago. I hope you enjoy, and don't hate me too much, I promise I'll make it up to you x

↳ *Spotify playlist* ༉‧₊˚✧

Keep your helmet, keep your life, son, just a flesh wound, here's your rifle

Crawling up the beaches now, “Sir, I think he's bleeding out"

And some things you just can't speak about

With you, I serve, with you, I fall down, down

Watch you breathe in, watch you breathing out, out

Neteyam had a flurry of messy thoughts percolating around his mind as he was following Lo’ak towards Three Brothers Rocks, where they knew Payakan was. He looked behind him where Tsireya, Ao’nung and Rot’xo, as well as Kiri and Tuk were following suit and worry overwhelmed him at what could be coming. He should calm himself, he thought. It’s all going to be alright, what are the chances the humans would go after Payakan, and the chances that this would happen now, when they were all going? What were the chances this would happen while his baby sisters were with them, anyway? They would all be alright… they all had to be alright. This world took so much from his family, from him, so much suffering and agony he had to live through, more than anyone should ever have to. His thoughts shifted towards his mother, his beautiful, kind and caring mother, who had to watch her sister, the future Tsa’hik, killed by humans, as were her father, her friend and former betrothed, her mentor, her home. Eywa wouldn’t be so cruel as to take more from her, she couldn’t.

He didn’t have time to dwell on the unfairness of the Universe, not when Payakan quickly came into view before them, showing Lo’ak the pinger deeply inserted in the thick skin on his side. Fuck.

Lo’ak quickly jumped on his spirit brother’s fin and started pulling at the rod, with little avail. He watched in horror as a massive ship turned a corner and came fully into view, and with a last thought to you, and your agonising last conversation, he allowed adrenaline to take over him and move him towards where his brother was. He had to do this.

“Bro, come on, help me out! Hurry, the ship’s coming.”

Neteyam reached a hand out to Ao’nung and saw the rest of them get onto the tulkun, starting to pull harder on the pinger that refused to budge, no matter the effort. They needed help. They needed their parents, they needed the Metakyina. He needed you. His hand mindlessly reached to the spot where he usually keeps his transmitter, and cursed loudly when he realised he forgot his radio at home. He looked at Lo’ak and felt relief wash over him when he saw that he was wearing his.

“Call dad. Call it in. Call dad, now!” Lo’ak wasn’t moving, so Neteyam grabbed him roughly by the arm and pulled him upwards. “Just go, do it!! Just do it!”

Neteyam couldn’t hear Lo’ak over the noise of everybody he was with screaming in pain trying to get this done, and, trusting his brother with the task at hand, he returned to his own, trying to figure out the best way to get everyone out of this mess.

“Dad, dad, I mean… Devil Dog, do you read me?”

Lo’ak’s voice pulled you out of your agonised thoughts, reeling after your dad’s message that just came maybe about a minute ago, and you gasped at confirmation there were still fine, that you still had time.

“Yeah, Lo’ak?” Jake’s voice sounded concerned, and you wondered briefly if he already knew, knew the danger currently facing their children, if he could feel it instinctually, like you could, deep within your soul.

“We’re with a…tulkun that’s under attack. Killer ships inbound, it’s about 2 klicks out.”

“Who’s with you?”

“It’s all of us, and Ao’nung and Tsireya, too. We’re at Three Brothers Rocks.”

“You get to cover and you do not engage, alright? Do you hear me? Do not engage. We’re coming.”

“Yes, sir.”

“Devil Dog, Eagle Eye, I’m on route, maybe 10 minutes out. I’m with Neyn, I’m coming. Over and out.”

“Hurry.”

Gideon watched as commotion happened all around him, all units ready to start their assault on the innocent tulkun. He got his gun out and looked at Quartich and the rest of the Recoms, almost drooling with excitement over seeing the Sully kids, knowing they were so close to finally completing their mission, and more importantly, finally exacting the revenge they have dreamt about since the first breath they took in this new body, this new life.

Concern was deeply imbedded in him, in his mind and soul, and he watched through the scope of his gun for the kids who were struggling to pull out the pinger reflecting red light onto the skin of the huge animal they were sitting on. Just fucking leave, just leave. She’s never going to forgive me if anything happens to you, so just leave.

Gideon was screaming internally at the scene unfolding in front of him, screaming silently at these kids who seemed to have a death wish, who were so irresponsible, his paternal instincts were kicking in full tilt, ready to give them an ass kicking of a lifetime if they all managed to survive this. He’s in this now, he realises briefly. He’s in this. His daughter’s family, potentially his family if any of them manage to ever forgive him for a lifetime of sins he was willing to work his ass off to repent for - all in danger, all risking their lives for this being, knowing full well what is waiting for them if the people on this ship catch them. Is this what it means? To be Na'vi, to live on this planet? Is this how interconnected everything here is, that despite knowing better, despite knowing the dangers that lie ahead, they would be willing to die for another soul? Is this what it meant to see?

“Let’s roll.” He watched as Quaritch got onto his ikran, alongside Weinfleet, and took off, at the same time that the boats armed with people and harpoons hit the water, speeding towards the tulkun. Shit.

He had to wait for his moment, had to wait for a distraction, otherwise he would die before he got the chance to help in anyway. His eyes moved towards the human kid next to him, looking scared and anxious, looking how Gideon was feeling. They exchanged a knowing look. It was time. Time for both of them to go where they truly belonged, to go home. Gideon nodded slowly in his direction. Wait for my mark. Spider was trained by a soldier, that much was true, and the man appreciated Jake Sully’s influence and role in raising these kids a little bit more. He allowed himself to hope, for a second, that it would all work out. These weren’t just normal kids. These were warriors. Ready for battle, raised for the inevitable war that would come to their doorsteps once more sooner or later. If anyone could do this, it’s them.

Neteyam felt exhausted as he was sitting on top of his ilu, the feeling mirrored across the bond from the effort the animal was putting into pulling the pinger out of Payakan. He felt so bad for his aquatic friend, but knew the sooner they removed it, the more time they had to get away. His parents were on the way, so he knew they would be alright, that his sisters would be alright, but the sight of boats approaching them rapidly made the sound of his heart echo painfully in his ears.

“Pull harder!”

“PULL!”

He was thrown forwards as the contraption finally fell in the water, and he took a second, just one second to be proud of the work they did, to be happy they would be able to save the tulkun. Cringing a little at the thought of what you would do at his next words, he spoke:

“Come on, get out of here. Go that way, I will draw them out.” He took off without a second glance, once again the sacrificial lamb for his family. He wouldn’t have it any other way.

An explosion almost took him out, deep ringing in his ear and confusion all around as the ilu tried to understand what was going on around them. He knew, all too well, the power of the human mind, the guns and bombs that were made for mass murder, made for annihilation. He recovered and tried to calm his pal, propelling through water, trying to put as much distance as he could between the blinking device and his family, who took cover in the deep underwater flora at the bottom of the sea. When it was far enough, he let it go, watching as it sank, and moved along, trying to hide before it was too late. They had no weapons, no bows, or arrows, no spears or guns, they were defenceless against the most powerful enemy they were ever going to face. All they could do was hide and wait for their parents to come, for you to come. He didn’t want you here, amidst all of this. He was terrified of the consequences of your fight, but a lot more so of the consequences of this fight. He wanted you as far away from it as possible, but he knew you better than to ask you, to expect that you would stay away. And deep within him, he was relieved. He could do this with you by his side. He needed you, as he always did, to be his light and show him the way out of this. No matter what changes between you, this never will.

You broke through the clouds and the Three Brothers Rock came swiftly into view, and it was impossible to not see the massive ship taking up most of your line of sight. You brought your hand to your radio and pushed the little button, hands trembling in fear and the adrenaline rushing through your veins.

“Devil Dog, I’ve got visual on the ship. I’m about one klick away south of it. I see a big ship, 5 boats, I see…fuck… I see Quaritch and Weinfleet on their ikran. Shit, shit. They got someone, it’s Lo’ak. And Tuk, and I think Tsireya. They’re bringing them to the ship. I’m going in.”

“No! Do not engage, do you read me, Quickscope? Do not engage. Sit on your ass, we’re a few minutes out.”

You growled loudly at Jake’s voice, not answering him. You pressed the other button on your second choker.

“Dad, do you read me? I’m about a klick away from the ship. Please make sure they don’t hurt the kids, please, dad. I’m waiting for Jake and the Metkayina to arrive. Stand by. Over.”

Gideon could only focus on your voice so much as he watched Quaritch drag 3 kids onto the ship, one of which was holding on for dear life to the net his siblings were caught in. As soon as Spider caught wind of the scene, he ran for dear life towards the door where they were, pushing anybody unlucky enough to stand in his way, and Gideon found himself running with him, trying to stop him, as well as having to see this for himself, having to make sure the kids will be alright. He recognised the boy and the little girl from the forest, and the man now knew they were called Lo’ak and Tuk. You spent a lot of your time last night talking about them, your almost maternal care for Tuk very obvious even in the short time you spent with him. Lo’ak was hissing at the men encircling him, threatening with a knife, that he had to know was futile against the army surrounding them.

“Stop, don’t hurt them!” He caught Spider and kept him back, to stop him from hurting himself and the others with his recklessness.

“Calm, kid.” He whispered as he held him. “Calm, we’ve got this.”

“Bro, you’re ok?”

“Yeah…great, cuz. Never better.” If he wasn’t so fucking tense, Gideon might have cracked a smile at the kid now laid flush on the ground, but still cracking jokes. He liked him.

“Get back to the bridge.” Gideon gave Spider to some of the humans all around them, as Quaritch dismounted from his ikran. “Keep him there!”

“Yeah… I remember you.” The boy was hissing in Quaritch’s direction, no fear or hesitation in his eyes. Either he was really brave, or really really dumb. Very often the line is very thin, Gideon thought.

“Tie them to the rail, all of them.”

All of a sudden, he was painfully aware of the weight of the knife tucked in a sheath on his waist, and Gideon knew he had to wait for the right time to be able to break the kids free and get them to safety. He wondered briefly if you were watching, if you were seeing what was happening, if you hated how your own father wasn’t doing anything yet.

Your thoughts were all scattered between worry for your siblings who you knew were currently on the ship, but you couldn’t see them anymore, too far away from any clear view, paralysing fear wondering where Neteyam was, and anxiety over having to wait for Jake and the Metkayina. You were circling the rocks, waiting, when you saw Neytiri on her Ikran. You sighed a big sigh of relief, and reached your fingers to your forehead when she spotted you. “I see you, sa’nok.”

You heard noises and ululating beneath you and finally saw the sea of orange Tsurak making their way toward the ship. Almost on command, you saw them all stop and fall in line. Jake…

You felt bad that the one thing he tried so hard to avoid, the one thing he didn’t want, the calamitous fight for his life, for his children’s life, for his family, has come with thunderous power, ready to overtake him, ready to overtake you all. You wondered if he was getting flashbacks to almost 20 years ago, wondered if you would too in 20 years after today, if you were to survive this. You came too close to death too many times, and watched people you love hug it tightly before willing it away, and you prayed over and over that death wouldn’t hold on to anyone you loved ever again, not for a long time.

“Jake.” A voice you have heard once before, enough to never want to hear it again, enough to give you nightmares sounded gravely in your ears. “Tell your friends to stand down. You want your kids back, you come out alone. You know better than to test my resolve.”

You hissed loudly and wanted to speak, but you knew he would be able to hear you, and right now you had an advantage, they didn’t know you were here, didn’t know you had an ikran.

“I took you under my wing, Jake. You betrayed me. You killed your own, good men, good women. I will not hesitate to execute your kid.”

It was clear to you right in that second that Quaritch did not play around, and he was not bluffing. His voice was unflinching, angry, seething and you knew he meant every word he said. Lo’ak… Tuk…

Fear was overtaking your every thought, overtaking the adrenaline fighting to keep you going. You were outnumbered, outgunned, and out-prepared. They had ships, helos, boats, machine guns, harpoons, grenade launchers. They had Ikrans, and they had the kids. You had no leverage that you could reasonably see. How were you ever going to get out of this alive? How were they going to get out of this alive?

Neteyam…

“Just… wait one.”

“Offer’s going to expire. What’s it gonna be?”

“Check your fire. I’m coming out.”

No. No. No.

You looked at Neytiri, confusion plastered all over her face, both of you just flying around aimlessly, waiting for your shot. Did she understand what was going on? Were there any words to explain it to her?

“Ma Jake, what is happening? Ma Jake?” Realisation hit and so did the tears, both of yours, softly trickling down her face, swimming painfully in your eyes.

Gideon watched Jake Sully make his way on the back of a fish, a very big fish. His nerves were eating him alive - what was he supposed to do? He was outnumbered, wildly outnumbered. Even if he managed to kill Quaritch and maybe Weinfleet, there were still half a dozen other Recoms, not to mention tens of soldiers in exo-suits. Maybe it would provide enough of a distraction, but it wouldn’t guarantee the kids getting out of here safely. The thoughts of going out in a blaze of glory, saving his daughter and her family intrigued him, but he couldn’t go without talking to you at least one more time. There was still so much to say. He had so much to learn. He still had so much to make up for.

Gideon had little time to continue his thoughts, as he felt the ship shake slightly, and he couldn’t help wonder for a second if they were getting caught in some sort of quake. His mind froze, as did his body, as the sight unfolding before him. The tulkun, breaching over the ship and landing on top of a few humans wearing exo suits while they screamed and tried to shoot it, to no avail. Shit way to go.

Mayhem emerged all around him, and he realised then this was his chance, when he saw Jake approaching the ship, the full force of the Metkayina close behind. He hurried back inside the ship, trying to make his way towards the middle pool, where most of the humans resided. He pulled out his knife and stabbed the soldiers posted in the doorway, whistling to Spider to follow him. He gave him the spare knife he had on him.

“Ready to get out of here, kid?”

Your breath hitched in your throat watching Payakan trash any and every enemy on sight, and knowing this was the chance you were waiting for, the opportunity of a lifetime, you wasted no time getting out the handgun that you were threatening your dad with just a few hours ago, now speeding at lightning speed in order to save his and the rest of your family’s life. God, how fast the night changes.

“Let’s go, sweet girl.”

Neyn let out a scream, and you joined, battles cries blending with the ones vocalised by Neytiri and the Reef Clan.

You bolted towards one of the airborne helos, willing Neyn to remove the shooter from the door with her massive claws, which stabbed him in the abdomen and dropped in the water. You barrel rolled in the air and came face to face with the pilot, which you shot straight in the head.

“Good girl.”

There wasn’t much you could do without your weapons, so after killing as many people as you could using Neyn as an extension of your own body, you settled for the big ship, knowing Lo’ak, Tuk, Tsireya, Spider and your dad still needed a way out. Your plans were quickly turned to dust when you spotted Weinfleet on his own ikran, barreling towards you, shooting at you with no end in sight. Let’s see if Tuk was right about me. “We’ve got this, girl.”

Neyn gracefully executed every command you gave her, dodging every bullet by the skin of your teeth, performing acrobatics you weren’t even sure you could, and you felt yourself becoming dizzy at the strenuous effort. You needed to save Neyn, no matter what, and the assault was unrelenting, and you felt yourself losing focus, which didn’t bode well for either of you.

Neyn, listen to me. When I jump, you go. Just get away and hide among the Three Brothers Rocks. I’ll call you when it’s safe. You felt restrain in her, pushing against your thoughts, against your wishes. She wanted to protect you, as much as you did her.

I’ll be alright, sweet girl. But I can’t be if anything happens to you.

Without a second thought, you undid your Tsaheylu and jumped in the water, bracing for the impact. You needed a second to adjust to the new environment, and tried to see if you could find an ilu anywhere. You called for one, all the while praying silently that Neyn got away safely. You avoided all the explosions and debris falling all around you, and got scared half to death when a blue form appeared swiftly, no doubt hearing your call. You almost gasped when you saw who it was, and had to try to settle your booming heart - Neteyam.

“Need a ride?” He signalled, smiling a small, sorrowful smile, one that despite everything, was still glowing and glorious, even here, underwater, even in these circumstances.

“Yes, please.”

His hand reached out for yours, and when you touched him, it felt like you came back to life. Like you would be alright. As long as his warm hand was holding yours, there was nothing you couldn’t overcome. You mounted the ilu behind him, and he placed his right hand on your thigh, holding you close, making sure you were secure. You wrapped your arms tightly around his torso and placed your head on his back, and for a second, just a second, it felt like all was good in the world again, and you were reminded again of how, whenever you were together, it felt like it was just the two of you, this whole world just your own personal playground.

He took off hurriedly, and you made your way to the ship, the mission at hand coming back into focus at full speed. The ship was moving away from you two, and Neteyam saw in shock how it got lifted from the water and then collapsed back on top of it, sending ripples all around you, making the ilu scared and jittery. He had to hurry. His hand tightened around your thigh, and the feeling of your body flush against him made his mind finally focus, his purpose clear as day again. He had to save you and his family. That was his purpose, has been his whole life. He was still so mad at you, so hurt and anguished at your seemingly unfixable problem, but right now, more than anything, he was just grateful you were here. Everything else can come later.

You tapped him on the shoulder and he saw you pointing upwards towards the surface, and he saw the side of the ship come into view. This was it. You held on tightly while the ilu launched out of the water and you both jumped, climbing onto the railings and right next to his siblings and Tsireya. He heard you let out a big gasp to let in the air you had to deprive yourself from underwater.

Tuk’s voice brought his attention back to the task at hand. “NETEYAM! SISTER!”

“Tuk-tuk, we’re here.” As you went to Tuk and Tsireya and let them loose using your knife, Netetam turned to Lo’ak.

“Hey, baby brother, you need some help?”

When his sister was unbound, Neteyam turned to you. “Get Tuk out of here.”

You scoffed, rolling your eyes. “Right, Neteyam.” He watched irately as you turned to Tsireya. “Get Tuk out of here.”

“Bro, HURRY UP!” He did as his brother asked, not being able to resist teasing him while at it. “Who’s the mighty warrior? Come on, say it.”

While Lo’ak was rubbing his wrists with his fingers, trying to alleviate some of the pain of being shackled, you picked up an SMG from the floor and made sure it was loaded.

“Finally. It’s like I was missing an arm back there.”

“Come on, let’s go.” Neteyam was turning to leave, needing to be rid of this place as soon as humanly possible.

“You guys go ahead. I have to find my dad.”

Neteyam saw Lo’ak give you a strange look, and he realises that his baby brother didn’t know, nobody knew about the meeting between you and your dad. Neteyam still didn’t know what happened at that meeting, but something had to, if you were willing to risk your life for him. Lo'ak turned back towards his brother.

“And they got Spider. We have to get him. Come on.”

“No, Lo’ak. You go. I will get Spider and my dad. I don’t want you here.”

Neteyam gave you both a hard look, growling at the insanity of what you were asking of him, of each other, of yourselves.

“Sullys stick together.”

You made your way through the ship that was slowly sinking, killing anybody that stood in between you and your goal. You were trained for this, you were ready. You didn’t like killing, didn’t revel in it, but as you came face to face with the men that willingly or unwillingly killed the tulkun and her calf, that took your family hostage, that were threatening everything you held dear to your heart, there was no hesitation in your aim, in your resolve. You went first, Lo’ak followed and Neteyam was last, gun in hand, covering your six o’clock. You were a bundle of nerves thinking of the two, worrying for them. You didn’t want them here, you wanted to know them safe and away from all of the dangers lurking on every corner of this ship, but you also understood that if the situation was reversed, you would have never left them, either. You were all in this together, have been since your birth.

You were crawling on top of the bars connecting the ceiling of the ship, trying to stealth your way through the more populated area, until you saw your dad and Spider, fighting half a dozen guys in exo suits. You dropped on the floor, shooting a couple in the head and you watched as Neteyam and your dad took care of the other four.

“Kid!”

“Spider!”

Your dad came to you and cupped your face in his large hand, the other one checking for any injuries. He held you at arms length and turned you around and looked at your back, your abdomen, your arms. You felt tears pooling in your eyes at the gesture, feeling your heart beating loudly in your chest. He was worried about you. Your dad was worried about you.

“You’re ok. Thank God you’re ok.”

You wanted to keep your distance, wanted to be harsh and aloof, but the weight of everything that you were going through came crashing down on you like a badly timed wave that crushed you under its weight, and you felt yourself closing the gap and giving him a hug.

“Dad!” You heard his gasp and he took in the interaction, and you felt his arms circling you, wrapping them around your back and reciprocating the hug that you have both needed all your lives.

“I’m here, kid. I’m here.”

It took a while for the next few moments to register in your mind. You heard a noise, and as you opened your eyes previously buried in your father’s chest, you saw a big metal door push open and an outbreak of humans with guns came rushing in, shooting at you and your family. You heard the deep haunting noises of shots fired, of people screaming, you saw blood pouring out of the men’s faces, bodies, you felt your dad push you out of the way and turning around to finish the job and as your mind came back to you, your first thought was of Spider, Lo’ak and Neteyam, and you turned around to make sure they were all alright. Spider’s arm was grazed by a bullet and he was bleeding, and you screamed, hurrying to his side. The wound looked superficial, and relief washed over you. Neteyam and Lo’ak were fine. They were fine. They were fine.

A cough and a small thud were all you heard as you took in your family’s horrified looks. Your breath was shallow in fearful anticipation as you turned around, and saw blood pouring out of your dad’s mouth in short, saccadic bursts. You stood there, frozen in time and space, unable to think or move, unable to understand the clear situation displayed in front of you.

“Atan…”

“Angel! Do something!” Lo’ak was shaking you now, trying to get you out of your catatonic state, and at the sound of yet another cough and a big splatter of blood getting everywhere over your dad’s clothes, you felt something snap in you, and you rushed to his side, looking at the damage.

No. No no no no. This wasn’t real. This couldn’t be real.

Your dad’s back took the bulk of the assault, and as you traveled your hand over his wounds and felt him wince slowly, felt his trembling body, you knew he didn’t have time. You knew then there was little you could do. Tears were spilling out your eyes and onto your wandering hands, and you knew that despite everything, you had to try. You had to try, because you needed time. He needed time. You just got him back. You needed time.

You took your knife from your waist and cut his ammo vest, jacket and shirt, exposing his back, that looked red and festering, blooding gushing out of every wound like an artisanal fountain. You needed to stop the bleeding, so you took the shirt he was wearing and cut it into strips, tightly wrapping them around him.

Think. Think. Think.

“Neteyam, help me tighten this. Keep him upright, I need to call for Neyn. I have supplies on her. I need to get him out of here.”

You heard loud thuds and shots fire at big metal doors on the other side, and you knew whatever was coming was even worse. They were about to break through, and you moved your dad behind cover, gun in hand, making sure to reload it. You didn’t know what to do, how to go about this, your entire being screaming for you to get your dad out of this burning, sinking hole and onto safe ground, where you could save him. You needed them all to leave - to live. You were scrambling for ideas, looking frantically all around you, when Neteyam came kneeling next to you, holding your face in his hands.

“You have to go. Now. Just go. Call Neyn and go, we have your back. We will meet you after.”

You shook your head violently, soft sobs escaping your parted lips.

“I can’t leave you. I can’t.”

“Yes, you can. We can do this, Atan. I taught you everything you know, remember? We can do this. We’ll cover for you, when I tell you it’s safe, you and your dad go through those doors and leave. We’ll be right behind you as soon as this is over.”

Loud bangs were interrupting your already scattered thoughts, and without further arguing, you nodded.

“Neteyam, I’m…-“

His lips smashed aggressively into yours, and you cried in the kiss, pouring your overwhelming emotions into it, into him, pouring the unspoken apologies and love you wanted to shout at the top of your lungs, but couldn’t.

“I know. Me too. We’ll talk. When I say, you go. Deal?”

“Deal.”

You turned to your dad, hand scrambling to erase the tears mercilessly falling down your face.

“Can you do this, dad?” He nodded, deep pain clear all over his face while he tried to position himself so he would be able to run at Neteyam’s signal.

Neteyam watched as two Avatars and enough humans with exo-suits that they were easily outnumbered pushed through the doors, guns blazing. He looked at your meek, exhausted form, drenched to the elbows in your dad’s blood, and he couldn’t help the sadness that enveloped him at the realisation you would have to watch your dad’s dead body once more in this lifetime, the Universe once again choosing you to bear the weight of this whole world on your shoulders, despite everything else you have had to endure. He was reeling at the hurt you were about to bear once again, at how much this was going to affect you, was going to undo all the healing you have worked so hard for. Why does everything have to happen to you?

He got his gun out and shot three of the men making their way towards them, and saw Lo’ak do the same. He wishes he had his bow and arrows - he was proficient with these guns, thanks to your help teaching them, but it still felt unnatural, wrong to him. He didn’t have time to be fussy about it, the problem in front of him much too important for such trivial matters. When he saw an opening as he shot yet another man, he shouted at you.

“NOW! Go go go!”

You got out onto the deck and let out a wailing cry, trying to summon your banshee that would have been waiting for your call. Soon enough, you saw her, flapping her wings majestically as she landed on the railing of the ship.

“Dad, you have to move, please. Please, I know it hurts, but I need you to try.”

You helped him as much as you could. He wasn’t speaking, just taking big breaths, trying to keep conscious. You could tell how well trained he was, what a soldier he had been. There was no sound coming out of him, no cry, no wail, no scream. Nothing, quiet as the dead of night as he suffered unimaginable pain and his almost nonchalant exterior made your torment even worse. It would be easier to digest if he was showing signs of suffering, but brave as he was - it all just made you feel worse, it made your heart ache so hard the broken shards were stabbing you from the inside out.

Eventually, you got him on Neyn and you took off, aiming for some of the rocks you could see in the distance. They were flat and tucked away from the fight still happening around you. Your mind was mush, being split in so many directions between your fear and hurt and the anxiety you felt thinking about your dad, about what you left behind on the ship, worrying yourself sick at the thought of Neteyam and your siblings fighting humans with metal armours protecting them, shooting to kill. Should you have stayed? Should you have left your dad on the ship and stayed with them and fight with them? It felt like an impossible choice either way, one you had no brain power to think about further without collapsing.

As soon as you landed, you got to work, dismounting him and placing him as gently as you could on the ground, hurrying back to your emergency medical bag, that you always, always had on your ikran, and placed it next to him.

As you hovered on top on him, getting supplies, you felt his hand wrap around your wrist, weakly, like he could barely manage even that.

“Kid… stop.”

Your bottom lips quivered, eyes glancing to his face. He looked…peaceful. Content. A small smile was adorning his beautiful face, now laced with sweat and blood and he squeezed your wrist to the best of his abilities.

“No. I can do this. I can save you.”

“You already have, kid. You have to stop now. It’s alright.”

You let out a pained sob, shaking furiously now.

“I just got you back. I can do this. Please.”

“I grew up rich, did your mum ever tell you that? My parents were big shots back in the States, and I grew up going to the fanciest places, the best prep schools. I got accepted into Harvard early, about 2 years before I had to graduate, and I was on my way to continuing my dad’s…legacy, if you can call it that.” You listened attentively to his words, trying to absorb everything you could about this man you found and were about to lose again in the span of one day. “My mother, bless her, she was…a kind woman. Too kind. She was weak and was too scared to ever stand up to my dad. He was a bad man. A very bad man. I watched as he beat my mother my whole life, and watched as he did the same to me until I was old enough to stand up for myself. I was 13 when I smashed a bottle of Armagnac across his face. He told his business partners it was a skiing accident. I was a coward, for so long. I wanted to leave, so badly, I would have taken off at 13 if I could, but my mother did not want to leave, refused to leave no matter what, and I didn’t want to leave her. I was scared of what would happen to her if I left.

She died, when I was 16. She killed herself. It’s fucked up, so fucked up, but when it happened…I was relieved. Because she didn’t have to suffer anymore - and neither did I. I left the day of her funeral, and never looked back.”

He was talking slowly, choking on every other word, his breathing shallow and weak, and by the noises he was making while he was inhaling, you knew his lung was collapsing.

“Dad… you need to keep your strength. You don’t have to say anything.”

“I do, kid. I do. I need to get this out. Please.”

“I joined the army, forged the documents to hide my age and that was that. I worked my way up and tried to make a new kind of legacy for myself. At first, I did it just to get away, but in time, I fell in love with the camaraderie of it. It felt for the first time in my life like I had a family. My squad was my family, and I would have done anything I could to save them, because they would have done the same for me. They were good people. My whole worldview changed. Everything. My desires and needs, my moral compass and principles. I knew nothing else.”

“I joined the army because I had to, because I had no other choice than to escape the hell I was brought in, the hell I carried with me everywhere I went. I joined the RDA because I had to do that, I had to try to save my daughter. I followed them into battle because it was my squad, it was the only truth I knew. My whole life, it felt like I had no choice. Like everything I did was cause it was forced upon me, cause I had to. But this, I can choose. I get to choose how I die this time. And I get to die for my daughter. I get to know my back, my body protected you from bullets that might have taken you out of this world, a world that needs you desperately.”

“No, dad…”

“I chose wrong the first time. I should have turned around at the first sight of the injustice, I should have joined your mother. I should have joined Jake. But I didn’t. I chose wrong, over and over. But now I get to choose right. And I am happy with that choice.”

“I am so sorry, kid. So sorry for everything you had to suffer in this life, so sorry for everything I contributed to it. All my life, all I wanted was to be everything my father wasn’t, but I couldn’t. I couldn’t be better. And I am so sorry. I wanted nothing more than to see you grow up. Nothing more than to have been there to teach you, be there to love you. But I am satisfied with knowing I get to see you live, see you love a good man, who clearly loves you and will cherish you forever. And when you’ll have your own children, they’ll know your dad was more than a cowardly runt. I love you, kid. You and Sarah are the best things I have ever done, and I am sorry I couldn’t do better. And a really long time from now, when you see your mother again, tell her I love her. That I love her more than life itself, and whatever eternity awaits for me, she will always be there to guide me through it.”

Your vision was blurred now, so many tears inundating your every sense, making a mess of your spinning world, swiftly falling apart around you. You saw his eyes flutter closed and he let out a final breath that felt like he had been holding in his whole entire life. Your hand went to his face, that you caressed gently.

“You tell her yourself, dad.”

Neteyam knew they couldn’t continue for much longer the way they were. They had to leave. No matter how much they were pushing back, more and more people swarmed in and he knew they were going to be overtaken soon. He needed an opening and he needed to get his siblings out of here. He poked his head out and shot a few more people and screamed at Lo’ak, who was more than holding his own, hidden from view next to Spider thanks to a plank behind Neteyam. Neteyam couldn’t help be proud of his baby brother, who has blossomed into a great warrior, a great fighter, a good man in the storm.

“Lo’ak, Spider, we have to go. The door behind you, where she left through. You run when I tell you and jump straight in the water, am I clear?”

“Bro, you sound like dad.”

Neteyam pointed the gun without coming out from the cover and shot, firing as many bullets as possible, trying to cause the distraction needed for them to be able to run away. He didn’t think about anything else other than his baby brother when he screamed in their direction.

“GO GO GO!”

He continued firing until the last second, relieved when he saw the two boys jumping into water to safety, and then, trusting in his Na’vi skills, he ran as fast as his feet could carry him out the door, dodging the bullets landing all around him.

He heard it before he felt it. The squelching sound of flesh and blood, the muffled thud as the bullet pierced his skin and travelled across his body, the soft clink when it dropped from his chest onto the cold, hard floor of the ship. Then he felt it. Physical pain like he’s never experienced before, radiating and throbbing through his entire being. He could feel it in his throat, in his toes, at the tips of his fingers. He could feel his heart, pumping hard and fast, could feel the blood spilling out rhythmically, with every heartbeat that was so loud and clear, it was like his heart was exposed for the whole world to see. It might as well be, Neteyam couldn’t tell.

It all happened so fast, he felt his thoughts process in slow motion. He thought about you. You were always the first thought on his mind, but specifically now, specifically after he imagines you had to watch your dad die in front of you, had to put him down to sleep, just like you have your mother. The hurt he felt in his body was nothing compared to his soul, thinking about you needing to bury yet another loved one, you needing to say goodbye to him. He couldn’t do that to you.

“Neteyam, I can’t lose you. Losing you will kill me. It will break me worse than anything else I have ever gone through, and so you can’t die. Ever. And you can’t take stupid risks like that. I can’t lose you.”

“Neteyam, if you die, I will too.”

He had to live, he had to be ok, for you. For his brother, who would blame himself, as he always did, for his dad, who would also blame his brother. For his baby sister, who looked at him like a second father, like he was the mightiest warrior to ever live, who was much too young to have to understand what it truly means to be alive, how much loss you must go through in this life before you eventually lose yourself. He had to live for Kiri, who was sweet and gentle, and needed her big brother to be there for her when the world got a big too much for her liking. He had to live for his mother, who much like you, has lost too much, too soon, more than anyone ever should have to. His mother, who had to say goodbye to her whole world, there was no way she should have to say goodbye to her firstborn son.

He faintly recognised hitting the water, which did wonders for the wound that was being cleaned with every undulation and ripple, and he noticed the way it quickly turned from serene blue to ominous maroon. He heard Lo’ak call for an ilu and was surprised when Tsireya made her way to them, happy to have been reunited with her favourite new person.

“Get on.”

“Come on, bro.” Neteyam was struggling staying conscious already, feeling his mind slipping up at the continuous loss of blood.

Fuck. Come on. You can do this, Neteyam. You can do this. You can’t leave them. You can’t give up.

“Skxawng, I’m shot.” He heard nothing as deep silence enveloped his family swimming around him. Eventually, it all came clear into focus as Lo’ak cursed loudly, asking for Spider and Tsireya to help him onto the ilu. He tried to prop himself up behind his brother as best he could, and he saw Tsireya staying behind, saying something about Kiri and Tuk that Neteyam couldn’t process in his current state, not anymore.

Neteyam was heaving by the time they got to safety, unable to hear or understand anything around him, unable to focus on anything outside of his panted breaths and painful heartbeat, that was struggling to pump the blood that was still remaining in his body. The whole world was blurred and shaky and the only thought fluttering through him was you. Where were you? He needed you, needed you to tell him it was all going to be alright, needing his light to lead him out of the darkness quickly enveloping him and back to you, back to the forest and to your clearing, back to stolen glances and wishful touches, back to when the hardest part about his life was figuring out how he could ever resist you, how he would ever stop loving the beautiful, intelligent, incredible human girl that he could never have. He’d give anything to have that back, anything to make that his biggest problem. Because if he could go back, he would have never waited. He would have kissed you, like you wanted to be kissed, like Dean kissed Rory in that Gilmore Girls episode you loved. He would have confessed to you the first time he realised he was so irrevocably in love with you, in your bed, when you said his name in your sleep. He would have kept you and cared for you and eased your pain instead of adding to it, like he couldn’t help doing, despite his strenuous efforts otherwise.

If he could, he would tell you he forgives you, and he doesn’t blame you for the fight. He would go back and tell you that it bothered him months ago, and listened to you as you poured out your heart to him and the insecurities that plagued you, and you would have worked through it together in time. He would tell you how sorry he is, that this world and his upbringing made him the way he was, that he was unable to speak of the things that dwelled deep within his soul and nested there, festering and hurting until they exploded in him, and he exploded around you. He is sorry for all the wasted time, for the year you spent apart. He would tell you he’ll always regret calling you a coward, always regret leaving you in that meadow where you died, only to be found by his dad and not him. It should have been him. If he could, he’d scream that there’s nothing in this world that he would change when it comes to you, and this once-in-a-universe love you shared. He would tell you that despite the fights, and the struggles, and the messy past, and the unknown future, you will always be his most formidable happenstance, the best thing he has ever known, the person he has loved the most, and your eyes will always be the beacon he carries with him to whatever lies beyond.

No words came out.

You finished cleaning your father’s wounds and your own bloodied hands when you heard commotion in the near distance on a different rock, and watched in horror as Jake was helping up Lo’ak and Spider. You didn't even have time to process your loss, yet another loss, when you saw a body being carried to the shore, carefully, like it was delicate china; your whole body halted as you took the scene in, as you realised the body was Neteyam’s. Almost robotically, you got up and got on Neyn, silently telling her where to go. She did as you told her, and in no time you made it, dismounting midair, not being able to wait for the landing.

A second. That’s all it took for the world to fall apart around you, to burn to the ground, only the ashes of your past, present and future remaining. Just a second to see your mate’s shaking body, his family circling him, kneeling next to him. A second to hear Jake telling Lo’ak to put pressure on the wound, a second to see that blood was pouring out at both the entry and the exit point of the bullet, meaning it passed through his whole body. A second to realise the bullet was just above his heart, which meant it probably hit his aorta or pulmonary artery, in which case he would be bleeding out in front of your eyes, with nothing you can do to stop it - yet again.

A second for your whole life to flash before your eyes, for every one of the million moments you spent together to appear in front of you like a film reel on a screen. Sleeping in the same crib from when he was born, just a couple of months after you. Sharing food as babies, throwing it at each other, feeding each other. Wearing his little loincloth as a toddler so you could sleep peacefully when he wasn’t there. Tugging at his little braids because they sounded pretty when the wind blew the beads in them against each other. Your first peck on the lips when you were both six as your parents laughed and said in another life, in a different life, you were meant to be together forever, that you were soulmates. Your first hike when you were 8, when he taught you how to climb trees and caught you when you fell from a couple meters up, straight into his much bigger body. His ninth birthday when you worked really hard to bake him a human cake, but you put salt instead of sugar and he still ate it and told you it was delicious because he didn’t want to let you down - he never touched human food afterwards, though. Giving you the bracelet when you were ten, that you subconsciously raised your hand to feel right now, still tightly wrapped around you, like it always was. The day he left. The day he came back. Your first sleepover, the first night you looked at his lips and wondered what they would feel like against yours. Your first actual kiss, angry and passionate. Every one of your subsequent kisses, that you could see each of, along with every hug, every cuddle, and touch of the hand, every look of love and adoration, every night buried in each other. You saw it all. One second.

“Atan.” His shaky, breathy voice pulled you out of your nightmare and into a fresh one, but you woke up and moved next to him. You had to do this, no matter how badly your entire being was telling you to run, telling you that if you watched him die, you would never in your life recover, you would never live again, you had to do this. You would never forgive yourself if you left right now. He needed you. You were his light, he's always told you as much; he needed you. You placed your hand on his wounds and pressed on it, and you felt his hand wrap around yours.

“I’m here. I’m here. Just stay with me, please. I can fix this. I can fix it.”

He tried to smile a little, but a grimace was the most he managed.

“It’s alright, Atan. I want to go home.”

No.

NO.

NO!

You were deep in thought, doing the math for all the solutions you were trying to make for the next steps in your set of experiments when you heard the door slide open. You paid no mind to it, as it was most likely one of the scientists and you didn’t want to lose track of all the hard work you have put in so far. It turns out, no matter how hard Max and Norm tried, math never came easy to you, and you felt cheated by how much of it you had to do for biological experiments. When a tiny groan came out from somewhere near the door, your eyes shot up to the voice you recognised better than your own and dropped the pen where you saw Neteyam standing there, blood pouring out of a wound on his chest.

“Oh, my God!” You rushed to his side, instantly forgetting about the thing you’ve spent the last hour trying to figure out, and tried to pull him towards the nearest chair. It was pointless, your effort, as his body, almost twice as large as yours and about ten times stronger, was still, no matter how hard you pushed. “Move, Neteyam.”

“Stop worrying, Atan. It’s not that bad.” You blushed a little, the nickname that he gave you recently still fresh in your mind, still sending butterflies everywhere in your body. Light. He thought of you as his light. How were you supposed to be friends when he called you his light?!

“You skxawng, how did you manage to do that?” He sat down at last, groaning as the cold surface made contact with his bare thighs. You were out of your mind with worry, still not used to it, even after all this time, him going off on dangerous scouting and hunting missions and crawling back to you like this, bloody and bruised and in need of medical attention. He never went to Mo’at. He came to you. You wondered why that is. It couldn’t be cause he believed in the miracle of science more than his own grandmother, his Tsa’hik, so it must be something else.

“I hunted, it hunted back.” You rolled your eyes at his desire to always keep these things from you, still thinking he’s protecting you from the outside world, from the dangers lurking on Pandora, like if he did, you would maybe be more likely to go out with him, instead of spending your entire life in this lab.

“I thought you said you were going to be more careful.”

“I was careful, Atan. These things happen at hunting parties.”

“Sure… it almost seems like they always happen to you. I’m starting to think you like the feel of the stitches on your skin.”

He blushed a little and you raised an eyebrow. What’s that about?

“Let me go grab my stuff. I hope you know you have contaminated my work space and will now have to spend the rest of the day disinfecting everything, so you better be in a lot of pain.”

He laughed, wincing a little as the action made his wound hurt more. You hurried, grabbing everything you need to patch him up, as you always did.

He stood in silence as you worked, looking at you, which made the pounding in your ear, a mirror of your racing heartbeat, painful and impossible to ignore. You cleaned his wound and scratches on his arm, tracing his stripes, more pronounced than any other Omatikaya you’ve seen. It reminded you of Earth tigers, so majestic, so regal.

“What are you thinking about?” He pulled you out of your reflections with his soft, deep voice and it was your cheeks felt hot, knowing you couldn’t possibly tell him the truth.

“I was thinking that this wound on your chest is going to take forever to stitch if you don’t want a massive scar, so you better take a deep breath from that mask and settle in. We’re going to be here awhile.”

He didn’t look too upset about it.

It took a long time, but eventually you stitched everything that needed stitching, proud of your handy work, happy to know he will heal fine and there will not be anything marring his beautiful skin when this was over. You looked at him, and your eyes fell on his face, so close to yours, at the same level as yours as he was, plopped onto the chair, and then you noticed the gash on his lower lip, gulping loudly when you realised you had to treat that too. He looked at you curiously, and at your hands which were looking for some antiseptic cream.

You didn’t look at him as you took a clean gauze, dipped it in water and gently applied pressure on the wound, that had dried blood all over it. You worked in silence, praying he couldn’t hear the thumping of your heart and how you kept having to swallow every few seconds. You applied the cream on his lip using your hand, and patted it down slowly.

“Don’t lick your lips for a while, or you’ll take this off and the moisture will only make it worse.” You started turning around, needing a little space, but he caught your small wrist in his hand, arresting it in midair.

“Thank you. Don’t know what I’d do without you.”

You smiled at him, grateful for his presence in your life - now and always. Your eyes fell on his and then travelled to his lips, and your mouth opened slightly in need. You were both just sitting there, looking at each other, feeling things you had no business feeling, and when the pressure, the shift in the air was so intense it was palpable, you slowly lowered your arm and he let go. This couldn’t happen.

You didn’t want this to continue being as awkward as it currently was, so you smiled again, your voice barely above a whisper.

“You’ll never have to find out.”

“But next time, I am doing this with no anaesthesia, so you better think twice before you get yourself hurt again.”

“As long as you are there to heal me, I will always be alright.”

“NETEYAM! NETEYAM!”

Neytiri’s wails were punching holes in your whole body, each one bloodier than the last. The final blow came from his eyes, vacant and glossed over. You looked at your hands, tightly placed on Neteyam’s now still, unmoving chest, drenched in his blood. You looked at his now cold hand, which let your wrist go and fall to the ground, and you felt empty.

Taglist (thank you ily x) @changing7 @erenjaegerwifee @im-in-a-pansexual-panik @winchestertitties @puffb4ll @rebeccao03 @ultimatebluff @cottoncandy23 @zaddyneteyamlovergirl @n3t3y4msm4t3 @loquatious-josephi-krakousky @eternallyvenus @fresh-new-yoik-watah @lu-the-ghost-reader @@miawastakens @mm0thie @fanboyluvr @amortencjja

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aprettyweirgirl · 7 months

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some linzumi (with the firekids) headcanons bc i havent done that in a while

izumi sings the song "I Touch Myself" by Divinyls to lin

one of the things lin has observed throughout the years is that ursa and izumi are essentially the same person

"hey your kids broke a window"

"why are they only my kids when they do something bad?"

over 20 years together and lin still asks if she can kiss her

lin and izumi get drunk together!!!! except Izumi gets drunk pretty fast and lin doesn't

izumi moves her hands when she talks and her wife thinks its the cutest thing ever

when iroh goes to visit the Fire Nation, he spends most of his first day with izumi in a couch in her office. he'll either sleep or read or literally do anything else, but he will be with his mom (and she makes sure to have her schedule clear so she doesnt have to be moving around too much)

lin calls izumi "lady beifong" to teaser her and it never fails to make her smile

at some point in her life, izumi whispered to tenzin's ear "i fuck your ex" and then smiled at him. he has never been the same since then

one day ty lee caught azula staring at lin and izumi and asked "what are you thinking?". azula just turned around and said "we'll need to prepare a wedding" with a smile

the first time ursa walked into the police station, she had all eyes on her bc of course shes young, beautiful and hot. when she left, lin walked her out and when she came back inside she immediately noticed the men had had their eyes on her daughter, one of them was brave enough to try to ask about her: "chief-" "NO" they never looked at her like that again

most formal events they go to (not go together, theyre just happen to be both there), theyre just flirting and eyeing each other nonstop. they usually have sex at the end of the night

IVE SAID THIS BEFORE BUT IZUMI SAYS FUCK

they broke up once. "neither you nor im to blame when all is said and done"

#lin beifong #fire lord izumi #linzumi #lin x izumi #izumi's daughter #ursa ii #iroh ii #the legend of korra

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just-a-carrot · 1 month

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hiii! ive lowk been *obsessed* with Our Wonderland since like, the begining of summer and OH MY GOD?! i unfortunately couldnt llisten to it with the music since i only had time to play it at like 2:00 am BUT the storytelling is fucking awesome, the fact that each character is some shade of morally gray instead of having a "super good ive never done anything bad ever" protag and a "haha im evil im never redeemable" antag we got to see like, a lot of complexity in the characters, and you really dont see that often. Especially with Iggy because even he did some pretty bad stuff (mostly in arc 3) and like it adds a sort of nuance to the game and i literally love it so much. uhm uh yeahhh thats basically it like i just really really like your storytelling it lowk had me questioning my morals and rethink some relationships ive had and like its such a good game like more people need to play it bcuz its so like complex and the narritave is so good and i just love it so muchhhjhhj!!!!

and thats not even talking about the art like holy shit? not only is ur artstyle like, AMAZING, but you were able to have a bunch of animated scenes and a shit ton of different character sprites and im like "wow" cause like thats honestly like really impressive. the thing that made me wanna play OW was the art cause i really like visual novels that have art in them.

sorry for going on that rant i just really like ur game its so good 😭

anywayssss my question is what inspired you to make OW or the OW characters?

wahhhh... this is really sweet... thank you so much... 😭💕 i'm really happy that you like the game and chars so much. lkdjafd i'm glad you say that tbh. it was definitely something i wanted to get across in the game... like... that there's no "wrong" and "right" or "bad" and "good" and that we all make mistakes and hurt people we care about. but it's less about the mistakes themselves and more in how you learn and get better and grow (and ofc talk and apologize, etc.), which is something the cast in general is not great at LOL i wanted all the chars to have deep flaws...

hmmm as for inspo, i've said before that the initial kernel of an idea came back when i was still in school and got really into horror vns, creepy vocaloid songs, games like american mcgee's alice, etc., and it just grew from there over many years of living with the idea and having it evolve. as for the chars themselves, that is something that i honestly could not tell you exactly where they each individually came from. like i had a general idea of the types of chars i wanted but as for their designs and such i mostly just sat down one day and drew them. and much of their characters grew and evolved both before and even during production. so there's no real single source for any of it lakjdfasd it was just a lot of various thinking, dreaming, and getting inspired by a variety of random little things over many years...

#ask: ow

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haley770 · 7 months

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glue me by los campesinos! is my favorite song(by my favorite band) ever and it is so so wilmon. literally everything about this song is perfect and beautiful. the lyrics represent wilmon and young royals so much. so lets go through it, shall we?

just a little note: almost nothing about this is in any order of the show(it is in order of the lyrics), basically just what scenes/things i am reminded of by some of the lyrics because so much of it lines up with this amazing show [:

youtube

/this song begins with such an amazing line, "the clouds salivating, drooling from the sky at the thought of the trouble to wreck" it is raining. water is such a big component as a metaphor in this show to represent everyones feelings. (thank you @tvmicroscope i love your analysis') its also just such a beautiful way to describe the rain as well, the clouds salivating, oh my god (!!! WTFF thats AMAZING I LOVE IT). and then it continues, "and its high tide, as the sewers rise and the drains have become obsolete" it is flooding. both of these just make me think of how it was raining on wilhelm in the soccer/football field scene. when he was soo fucking high and confused and overwhelmed, his brain was being flooded by so many feelings and emotions. probably conflicting each other. wilhelms entire life as he knew it is falling apart, he lost his brother, his best and only friend. he blames himself. he feels guilty. he is burdened with the title of the crown prince, which is the last thing that wilhelm wants. and most importantly(to him at least) he had to reject the love of his life because the crown prince cannot be gay like that. he felt like he was drowning in all of these emotions. he couldnt handle it, "i cant do this anymore", earlier in this same episode when he yet again rejected simon. but still, he goes on and makes the most amazing(and somewhat embarassing) love confession to simon because that is what he really feels. it is the only thing he can take a chance with for him to feel anything nice. and real. (ily tvmicroscope your analysis' are so beautiful)

/and now simon turns up, "seems theres no place in this town, for something as pure as you seem" wilhelm definitely thought this when simon actually came to rescue him in the middle of the night all like "you came, oh my god you came, im so glad youre here, youre so beautiful" wilhelm was definitely shocked simon actually came, especially after all the back and forth wilhelm put him through. it just further proves how amazing(pure) simon is(for this world/town).

/another heartbreaking one "water to my waist in a shark-infested bin" again reminds me of the football field scene when it was raining. wilhelm is so overwhelmed with everything. the water. he just wants to talk to somebody, but he is surrounded by fake friends who want to use him, people who dont give a shit about him as a person. the sharks. he doesnt have anybody to turn to. so he takes the chance of calling simon.

/this time, i hear simon. "and i heard, that it hurts" it literally echoes simon's "love shouldnt be this difficult" from the season 3 trailer. or maybe even in season 1 where wilhelm completely betrays simons trust and then doesnt understand what he did wrong. its just so heartbreaking for both of them ): especially because simon still loves wilhelm but hes also angry at him. at first, wilhelm didnt want simon to be mad at him because of the drugs, and he wasnt. but now he lied, and their relationship has since changed, and simon is mad at him, rightfully so.

/this one is more direct, "two wrists, two wrist watches. tick-tick-tocking second hands slightly out of time" how many times have watches been brought up or specifically highlighted in just seasons 1 and 2? SO MANY TIMES. (haha get it) we even saw some watches in the season 3 trailer! even boris! "ive had this watch for 40 years and it still works" 40 years is honestly crazy though, what the hell. let me see that watch.

/yet another heartbreaking one, "i requested a room with a view, in the middle of a war between me and you" is literally wilhelm looking at the beautiful lake in season 2 crying because he has completely lost hope for simon and he felt soso alone )): thankfully(...)felice came to rescue him, replacing simon from season 1. parallels am i right?(we did NOT need another kiss between felice and wilhelm. one was enough. or apparently it wasnt i guess)

/and, excuse me, OH MY GODD, i can HEAR wilhelm telling simon: "ill be gloomy til they glue me in the arms of [he] who loves me, til the rats and worms are all interned at least five feet above we" he will not give up on simon until he is sure there is no hope left(which we saw in season 2 until the valentines day ball kiss, also in the previous paragraph). another scene that fits is how wilhelm asked simon to hold him ): and finally, just wille being silly (the rats and worms because rats and worms are inherently silly like come on) reminds me of their 'date' by the water in s1e5, but its also so sweet because he is saying he wants to be together with simon until death. which is really the only thing wilhelm definitely wants(as well as for august to rot in hell, or jail, either works but both would be best, but thats besides this point).

/then simon, "[he] smiled, at a joke" just in general how happy he is when theyre together. this reminds me of the lake 'date' again and how totally in love simon looked whenever he was looking at wilhelm. as well as the laugh at the end of s2e5 after wilhelm closed the curtains, im glad theyre healing and can laugh about that.

/once again, excuse me, THE FOOTBALL REFERENCES(its los campesinos' thing to have a lot of football/soccer references in their lyrics but i dont really know much about football/soccer, i just know the references are there) WITH THE WHOLE FOOTBALL METAPHOR AND HOW FOOTBALL=SOMETHING REAL(from what i remember about the tvmicroscope analysis, read it if you havent it was so amazing and it was just so nice to actually see someone take the time to go through the show and each clip and write everything down, i am not very good at spotting metaphors but i love reading about them). but we have roshs great line, "rowing isnt a sport. football is a sport." very insightful for this entire metaphor. i guess you could say when they were at rosh's football/soccer game for these lyrics, but i think thats a bit boring, sorry. i would also like to note that, because of my non-existent knowledge on football/soccer, i chose not to talk about them in detail because i really dont understand the references in the song. from what i do know and so we are on the same page, the references are "im diving into headers, put this pretty face where the boots are flying in" | "but we connected like a yeboah volley" | and "of missed panenka penalty" as well as the chant at the end of the song, but i will actually talk about that in depth because it isnt very specific. there might be more(probably) but im not 100% sure about them.

/finally, we have the entire ending, "ex-boyfriend, boyfriend, give us a song" repeating. another football reference by los camp! which also fits the young royals narrative. the repetition is used as a chant for football, a play on "give us a wave". firstly, the valentines day ball comes to mind. this scene is showing simon who he really(again football is a real sport, thank you tvmicroscope) loves at the valentines day ball, hence him chasing after and kissing wilhelm. he also previously said he couldnt fall in love with marcus, "it just feels like he likes me for real" and "i just dont understand why i cant fall in love with him" ON THE FOOTBALL FIELD. too bad he didnt take the hint back then. also(unrelated) he couldnt even spell marcus' name right. "Hej Markus" seriously simon? too bad he never sent that text. they could have potentially broken up sooner. and then at the end of the valentines ball when marcus wille is listening to his ex-boyfriend his boyfriend sing a song he wrote about HIM(despite him being unaware of this fact until the next episode). it is such a crucial moment in season 2's whole plotline(and wilhelms sanity). next, this reminds me how he literally fell in love with simon when he was singing for him when he was being welcomed to hillerska. the glance around at erik and august like "are you seeing this shit?" or "are we watching the same thing?" look because of simon is so iconic. and the smile is so sweet. his first gay panic experience. moving on, it reminds me of how they sang the same song together later in this same episode "it takes a fool to remain sane". finally, when wilhelm was PISSED because simon couldnt sing his song at the jubilee(and they broke up yet again) and he asked jan olaf about it. he really wanted to see simon perform that for him ): and for simon to be able to perform his song and be happy. at least wilhelm was able to give his wonderful speech. really i am so proud of him, nobody could have expected this from him, especially at this point. not even simon! "it was a.. um.. a moment i didnt want to share, with anyone else, so i lied about it". he has matured so much in such little time, he didnt even want to give this speech either. he shouldnt have to. his anxiety must have been through the roof and he probably threw up afterwards. and of course the infamous consequences. the only reason the queen talks with her son. at least he has simon with him now to hold him when it gets too much(no more fights season 3 please i beg i cant handle it after season 2, the ending did kind of make up for it all though). i got a little off topic but you get the point. also, i brought each of these different scenes up because the ending specifically repeated this lyric several times, like all of these different moments line up. its literally wilmons song, you cant tell me otherwise.

well, that was a lot. i have been thinking about this for WEEKS. months even. and while i typically wouldnt post something like this, i put soso much thought into writing this. like ive actually put so much thought into this its driving me insane. its literally wilmons song, in my opinion. i also just needed a reason to talk about my favorite song and band and relate it to my favorite show. please listen to the song(or anything by los camp! theyre AMAZING). thats really all i need in life, for more people to hear this masterpiece.

🩷💜 thank you💜🩷

i dont know if i will ever do anything like this again, perhaps. im not sure. i did actually enjoy writing this though. i didnt originally plan on writing anything significant but i got carried away. i was supposed to be drawing more wilmon, i want to finish it before season 3 is officially out but it is just so detailed📚. someone yell at me to finish the drawing PLEASE ! time is ticking but its so fucking DETAILED and TEDIOUS. oh my god theres only a week left WHAT THE FUCKK. anyways i loved this [: very fun!

[if there are any typos or just flat out mistakes, either no there isnt or just let me know, i probably wont fix it but i appreciate it. i also want to say i am aware i am HORRIBLE at staying on topic i just had so many things ive wanted to say]

💜

#Spotify #young royals #yr #wilmon #wilhelm young royals #simon eriksson #los campesinos #los campesinos!#Youtube

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mommycain · 10 months

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Ethel Cain

ive been a big fan of Ethel Cain for a while now and it all started in 2020. shortly after discovering her, I began listening to all of the music that she made and it was weird because i've loved rock, metal, electronic, shoe-gaze and indie music and the artists that produce music of those genres, but i've never been so obsessed with someones music, the only ones that came close were deftones, nirvana, linkin park, breaking benjamin, in this moment, Chelsea grin, white chapel, son lux, and lorn. These bands / musicians meant a lot to me and still do, but i was never as in love with them like i am with Ethel Cain.

Growing up poor, gay, and autistic in southern Ohio (Wilmington OH) i was very isolated and ostracized by many. By the time i was a senior in highschool i had enough trauma to make a psychologists head spin, i was personally attacked by children and adults ever since i came out as gay at a very young age, sexually assaulted, abused in every way imaginable by multiple people, recovering from addiction, had multiple suicide attempts, multiple loved ones die, and helped raise my brother all before i was 18, so I really connected with many of the themes and lyrics in her music. I dont mean to come on here and dump all of my trauma on unsuspecting people, i just still cant believe there is someone out there that makes music that i can relate to on such a massive scale. I just want to give her a hug and thank her for existing in the same world as i do. The cliche of people saying "their music literally saved my life" always kind of bugged me, sure, some artists got me out of some dark moments in my life, but Hayden's music really did pull me away from self harm and suicide many times in my adult life. i want to sit down and just talk with her for hours and listen to her life story and thoughts. i know ... trust me i know, i sound kinda crazy, but i,ve just never felt this way about anyone's music except for her's.

Ive annoyed all of my friends relentlessly with how obsessed i am with her music and her as a person, and ive been spreading the gospel of Mother Cain as much as i can, but here are some deep dives into my thoughts about my favorite songs by Ethel Cain.

Earnhardt- 2020 / 2021.

This is the first Ethel Cain song i ever listened to. When i listened to Earnhardt for the first time, I felt seen, understood, and i was so confused as to why she wasnt more popular. This song had me in a chokehold and i still listen to it religiously, but anyways, Earnhardt really spoke to me when i first heard it and i fell in love with her voice and her mind while listening to this song. The betrayal and hopelessness in the lyrics and the theme of wanting things to get better but everything seems out of your control and only finding peace when thinking about your own death, it all spoke to me in ways i never imagined a single song could.

Michelle Pfeiffer- 2021

While i was scrolling on tiktok, i came across a video of Hayden sitting in a diner with her friend and i thought the whole vid seemed like a found footage film and i loved it, i started reading the comments and there were people saying that she was "running from the law" and "she killed someone i think and now shes fleeing her state", while i was confused, i went ahead and looked at her profile and saw that IT WAS HER, the one who made Earnhardt!!! my favorite song!!! so i went ahead and looked at other videos then stumbled upon a promotion for her new song: Michelle Pfeiffer and immediately listened to it. I was hooked ever since.

Ptolemaea- 2022

Yes, the song that puts the fear of god and or satan into the hearts of the mentally sane and cid-het men, as well as being an anthem to those that have been wronged by those same men. The feeling i got from hearing this song for the first time was extremely cathartic. the demonic and haunting voice of hayden at the end of the song is unnerving and devastating, when you hear it, it feels like a looming figure standing over your paralyzed / near lifeless body, and it wants you to let go and submit to it. The symbolism and poetry in Ptolemaea is something i admire to no end.

Hard Times- 2022

This song quickly became one of my best friends favorite songs, and i dont blame her, Hard Times is another devastating song that paints a picture of sorrow, trauma, insecurity, doubt, shame, and longing for stability and peace.

Dog Days- 2019

An almost lullaby about toxic relationships, full of pain and confliction. wanting to keep someone close to you no matter how much they hurt you, allowing them to hurt you because you can still see a glimpse of who they used to be, the person you fell in love with, excusing the abuse because they still show you affection from time to time, even when you know that loving them is only hurting you and you know it would be best to leave, you stay because no matter how hard you try, you cant help but fear the possibility that nobody will love you as much as they do. you know its poison, but youve been drinking it for so long you worry that life wont ever be the same without it. This is another song i relate to immensely.

Alright, ive been awake for over 37 hours now, so im gonna get some shuteye. i hope you found my crazed obsession amusing and or insightful, and i hope i dont look like a total psycho lmao, i just wanted to geek out and fangirl a bit because again ... i dont really feel this strongly about other musicians.

ps: Hayden ... Queen Ethel ... Mommy Cain ... if by some chance you see this, let me know! so i can die out of embarrassment in peace. thanks, love ya!

#ethel cain #mother cain #mothercain

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taiiunknown · 2 years

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ALL THE RUMORS ARE

TRUE !⚠️🫢

RIRIxSHURI 🥺

Summary: Ever since RiRi and shuri got closer it have been none stop rumors about them.

Warning: none 🤷🏽‍♀️ just a lil inappropriate jokes around the end and a lil racist joke

I kinda thought of that song by Lizzo and cardi b with the title 😭

Disclaimer: I’m not a racist just had to make things a little realistic 💀

RIRI POV: Me and Shuri have been very close ever since the attack, When I went back to MIT I kinda felt guilty , All I can think about was that it was my fault that the war happened and that Queen ramonda death was on me No matter how many times shuri told me it wasn’t . A year pass and I decided to still be iron heart and Of course shuri continues to be the new Black panther, Later on as time passes shuri decided that she wanted to come to MIT with me so she can get the regular college experience even though she is literally the new queen of the most powerful nation. She has been keeping me company lately and even found away to be able to become my new roommate since me and my old one did not get along well, over the time me and shuri became closer it was like when you see her I’m not too far behind and when you see me she not far also.

Shuri POV: Ever since I came to MIT me and RiRi have been an unstoppable duo, she was constantly there for me and it was vice versa for her. Over the months I kinda started to have feelings for RiRi but I hid them well bc I didn’t want things to be awkward between us and plus I really don’t want to ruin our friendship.

I was in the cafe getting a muffin when RiRi texted me about this party

RiRi 🤍❤️: I heard one of these rich white kids are having a cool ass mansion party today and I was thinking about going , would you be my plus one there ?

Me: ya, for sure I don’t have anything else to do and plus I need more friends 😂

RiRi🤍❤️: Okay, Cool. You’re the best !

Me: what time should I be dressed ?

RiRi 🤍❤️: around 9:30, I’m tryna get there around 10:30 bc it be lit the most around that time 💀🤷🏽‍♀️

Me: Ok !

*2 HOURS LATER*

“Omg this look like something off euphoria for real 😧” RiRi said walking in the mansion with her mouth wide open “What is euphoria?” I asked confused as ever “God bless you” RiRi said palming her forehead “it’s not my fault I don’t know” I said “just come on let’s get a drink” RiRi said dragging me in .

RIRI POV:

“Jesus y’all don’t get enough each other?” My classmate Becky said walking towards us “Becky what are you talking about?” I said “YALL be giving couple goals, I’m tryna get like yall” Becky said shoving us kinda “Oh NO! We not together Becky” I said laughing a bit then looking at shuri who gave me this look that kinda gave me butterflies “Are you sure? Bc if not I can kinda take shuri off your hand a bit” Becky said biting her lip looking at shuri “no im sorry I don’t like bunnies, we barely even have them in Wakanda” Shuri said “we only have black ones not white one” Shuri continues. I just laughed a bit while walking away with a smirk on my face bc Becky mouth dropped to the ground as she stormed away, “ you are extremely mean yk ?” I said cheesing a little “Omg how dare you? I am the nicest” Shuri said while hold her left hand on her heart “I can’t believe everywhere we turn people think we a couple” I said looking at my cup “Well, I don’t blame them…” Shuri said “ ya you right.” I said now looking at her.

Shuri POV:

I really want to tell RiRi how I feel but I don’t know if this is the right time, Fuck it, ima just start off slow. “RiRi I have something to confess” I said “ what is it? Did you steal some of my pens again? Because I’ve been missing some” RiRi said side eyeing me “ yes and I dearly sorry for that” i said giggling at her surprise face “but that’s not what I wanted to talk about” I said smile slowly starting to turn into a worried face expression “go on..” RiRi said now making full eye contact with me “ I REALLY LIKE YOU, AND IVE BEEN LIKING YOU FOR SOME TIME AND ITS OK IF YOU DONG FEEL THE SAME WAY OR DONT WANT TO B FRIENDS ANYMORE!” I said rambling a bit “Oh ik …” RiRi said smiling hard “ yk ?” I said confused “ ya , Just like you’ve been watching me I have been keeping a eye on you, and trust me I feel the same way but I just wanted to see which one of us would break first” RiRi said with her hand now on top of mines “I’m flabbergasted” I said in a shock like state , RiRi just giggling while playing with my fingers “ so what are we then ?” I asked hesitantly “I don’t know,You tell me ?” RiRi said with a smirk “I want to be your girlfriend” I said boldly “then that’s what we are then” RiRi said “ I guess all the rumors was true then” I said laughing bc the been thinking me and RiRi had feeling for each other since I first got there.

*1 Year later*

*3rd person POV:

“BABE HURRY UP WE HAVE A TEST IN A HOUR AND YOU STILL NOT DRESSED FOR CLASS!” RiRi screamed from the bathroom

Shuri have been looking for a outfit for 20 minutes now .

“IM ALWAYS READY JUST GIVE ME A SEC!” Shuri yelled back “yk shuri , I kinda like you without clothes but sadly we have a test so I guess we are gonna have to wait a little longer to treat you” RiRi said walking out the bathroom putting her arm around shuri neck with a smirk on her face “For the love a bast, don’t think bc we got to be to class in 30 minutes don’t mean I won’t give you what you asking for.” Shuri said gripping RiRi waist “ ohhh okay I like this energy, but I was joking of course” RiRi said pulling away blushing “ohhh so you wanted to tease me, okay my naughty girl just wait till we get back to this dorm” Shuri said now walking out the door with her supplies in her hand “God I love her” RiRi said when shuri closed the room door “I love you more” shuri said peaking her head through the door with a smirk .

To the person who requested this I hope you enjoy it and also hope it reaches the expectations you was going for ❤️

#shuri x riri #iron heart #riri williams #shuri udaku #riri x shuri #riri x oc #shuri x y/n #riri x reader #wakanda forever

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estherhouses · 2 years

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March 15, 2023

This is the only note I have in my phone since I dont have my physical journal & I think it would be very helpful for me to write my feelings out because I know above this note I can look and pray for strength & guidance. I know nobody will ever see this since this is personal to me & these are things I can keep and share to myself. I’m going to title these “letters to my absent bestfriend”. Since I cant talk to you & I can’t be with you, these little personal notes are the things i wanted to tell you but could not. So i’ll keep them to myself here. I’m not a big technology person like i dont know or payed much attention into how these things work but i hope they help me let go. Today was a tough day. Work had something in the atmosphere that just made me want to leave, i felt like i physically couldnt stand being there & i hated it. This is the latest ive gotten

out & it was just tough. I tried my hardest to keep my head on straight & be me. But how can i be me when part of me is missing? After work, I almost drove to your house. Our song came on in my shuffle playlist “tuyo y mio” & I just couldnt i literally broke down, this was the first mental breakdown ive had since you been gone & all i wanted was for you to hug me & tell me it was okay. Maybe the whole relationship it seemed like you loved more, but going through this really showed that i loved more…. i did so many things for you that i didnt even notice & that’s why im more broken than you. I always said a bunch of things i didnt mean but i always did things you probably didnt notice that made your my priority. i always preached to you about loving yourself first, meanwhile i always loved you before me & i think that’s what hurts me the most. i did so much for you, literally everything i did was for you. the reason i got into engineering was not for me, god knows it wasnt for me & my interest in it was depleting everyday but i sucked it up and did it for you, for us, so that i could take care of you in the future like you would take care of me now, so that we wouldnt have to struggle & you were able to have your house with your golf course & your truck and our family. i didnt care about the sleepless nights, i didnt care about all the pain & all the stress because my motivation was you. i went to work & strived to be the best so that i can save up money & we wouldnt have to worry about things, i didnt care if you gave me a piece of paper that said “happy valentines day” or “happy birthday” or “merry christmas i love you”, i genuinely did not want any gifts from you, i didnt care about the chores you did for me, i didnt care about any of that i just cared about you. i just loved you & if i had to live in a box for the rest of our lives i would of done it happily because it would of been with you. i guess maybe i just didnt know how to love, i didnt know how to express it & would push you away to test whether you loved me as much as i loved you, but maybe that was too much for you & i needed to see that it’s not the way to show love, but that’s the only way i knew since i was always pushed away when i was younger. maybe when i was figuring out how to love you, it was too much for you, maybe if i had been a tad less in love it wouldnt hurt me as much. i’d wake up everyday and think of you, i’d think about what you were doing at work, about how your day went, if you had a good day or a bad day, i always wanted to let you into my my heart & see for one second how i see you, maybe then you’d understand what you mean to me. but i always had my guard up because i was scared, i was scared of how much love i had for you that it made me frightened because if i ever lost your love i’d know i’d never survive so i always had a little wall up that you’d manage to climb through every so often and those were the peaks of our relationship, but i guess my wall did have a purpose because at the end look at where we’re at now. i still love you & i will always love you but i dont see you the same anymore, i know it’s my time to let go but i wish we can erase these past two years & go back to the good times, the great times. i loved you so much i came back from SF for YOU. was i ever gonna tell you that or even say it out loud? no because how pathetic would it sound for me to say i left the greatest city that brought me peace & tranquility to be with someone i love, who can leave me & hurt me, how would that have sounded ? how would it have sounded that i lead my life with my heart while i preached for others to lead with their head? i love you & i always will love you, if only we can switch spots for a day would you see that i always loved more & maybe you’d understand why it’s so hard for me to let go. Letting go of my past relationships were easy, but you, nobody i meet in my lifetime will ever compare to you. youre my soulmate, my other half, i feel it so hard & i feel it so much… but i have to let you go. i have to let you be free because

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narwhalandchill · 1 year

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Tag game: Current

got tagged by @begaydoalchemy !! thank u !!

- Current time: 9:45 (AM for you US peeps smh)

- Current activity: finished up prefarming blades traces to 6/8/8/8. double calyx drops events is a godsend. was listening to a video essay on the bg but the favorite song section made me go listen to stiny on repeat again bc i love inflicting emotional damage on myself so i guess thats what.

- Currently thinking about: so theres this person in the hsr leaks subreddit megathread doing daily renheng insanity ponderings since blades trailer dropped and ive been just losing my mind ever since reading them. anyway i wanted everyone here to get to see them too but didnt wanna repost em bc its just kinda ehhhh to do so. here u go!! suffer with me!!! click the links theres all 3!!! (spoilery warning tho. idr how many leaks refs there are in there exactly but expect some at least)

- Current favorite song: spotify most listened to top5 currently looking like NEON by raon, kissaki by reol, wildfire, cha cha cha (we will never forgive xx swedes watch out) and stiny from KALUSH & jerry heil.

but like let me be clear the only reason reol isnt number 1 is bc the full version of the song only came out like 2 weeks ago and the earlier released shorter anime ver of kissaki is literally 7th on the list.

- Currently reading: ...i mean mostly just renheng fanfic but uhhh. i did read where the crawdads sing from delia owens (just plucked it out from the bookshelf randomly bc i was bored) a month or so back. it was neat but no like particular strong feelings abt it. it was very well written and i liked the flow of the prose a lot. also waiting for crooked kingdom to get a finnish translation bc i got six of crows in finnish and i dont do book series as mixed language sets generally. (also the translation work itself was just like an absolute fucking banger with the imagery and metaphors used like chef kiss)

- Currently watching: no particular show (last thing was when i rewatched fmab a couple months ago) going on but like. random video essays or informative stuff on yt honestly and its mostly for bg noise.

- Current favorite character: gee i wonder. dan heng (past editions included), blade, (big gap here bc i tunnel vision on characters), bailu, luocha, jing yuan i think for specific ones from hsr for now. am looking out for jingliu and fu xuan too i need to study them. in genshin its like. yeah its mr childe ajax tartaglia all the way but i kinda just havent been feeling it for the game much so eh. tighnari, kazuha up there too n arlecchino obvi.

- Current WIPS: what kind of productive person do you take me for??? ig i like. opened word this week to type out some random passage drafts for a ficlet type thing relating to the post i made a while back abt belobogs temperatures wrt dan hengs potential terrible, horrible, no good, very bad scalie time with it but do Not expect any results from that or anything i s2g. ive finished one fic in my life and that was half poetry half madness full one sitting and be done with it type deal

im sorry i have no idea who to tag so like. anyone who wants to do it feel free, mutuals or followers!!! :]

#rambles #this was my first tag game thing ever would u believe. it was fun :]

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tottenhamhotsperm · 2 years

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'cause sometimes, I look in [his] eyes, and that's where I find a glimpse of us

#aew #njpw #golden lovers #kenny omega #kota ibushi #hangman page #hangman adam page #my edits #ANOTHER EDIT YAY #song is glimpse of us by joji!!!!#this is literally the only thing ive been thinking about ever since the song came out #it matches these 3 PERFECTLY its not even funny #i was gonna write a fic about it but uhhhh writers block so heres a short little edit instead :]#gl classics

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sturkillerbase · 2 years

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It's All Coming Back to Me in Waves

PART V

Summary: Din is touch starved, and there's nothing in the galaxy he wants more than to feel your skin on his. The same applies to you, although none of you could bring yourselves to admit it. And, like you, he'd also like for you to see him. He finds a solution; not entirely what you want, but enough to calm your troubled minds. Or perhaps... it only stirred things more...

Genre: fluff, slow burn - "SO incredibly fluffy you might implode", in the words of the lovely @misspearlssideblog

Song rec: 252, by Gem Club

Warnings: none

Words: 2.5k

A/N: Had to look at a bunch of young Pedro pictures for this one. Absolutely not a complaint.

Intro; Part IV; Part VI

I wish you could see me/I can see you

Present time

Din and Grogu had been with you for a couple weeks now, and every single day you could swear you hadn’t ever been so happy in your life than you were now. Grogu was absolutely adorable, and way smarter than he seemed. “Don’t let his cute face fool you.” Din had warned, and he was right. Every now and then the baby would do something that would have you speechless. But what you couldn’t figure out was how the fruits on your counter kept disappearing. Din told you Grogu had a tendency to steal food when no one was looking, but it still wasn’t clear to you how he could get on top of the counter since he was way too little for that. When Din told you the truth about Grogu, you widened your eyes at him and immediately exclaimed:

“What, like a jedi?? Like Luke Skywalker?!?”

“You know Luke Skywalker?” Din was genuinely surprised.

“Din, everyone’s heard of Luke Skywalker. He literally saved the galaxy, to make it short. He was still around when you and I were flying together back then. I don’t know where he is now though.”

“Oh…” was his only answer.

“You didn’t know him?!”

“No. But… I kind of met him.”

“You met the jedi Luke Skywalker?!?” You nearly yelled, almost not believing in what Din was saying. Perhaps if it had been someone else, you wouldn’t have believed. You grabbed his wrist and pulled him to sit down with you and tell you the whole part of the crazy story that he had so casually not deemed too important to share.

After you learned everything about Grogu, you swore to give your life to protect him from whatever dangers came his way. You were no warrior, nor did you know how to fight properly. But you had heavy tools all over your house and your work shed, and you were absolutely not afraid to use them.

Right now, though, you were helping Din fold his (previously very dirty) laundry. He didn’t have much; most of it had been blown up with the Crest, but you had finally convinced him to buy new clothes for him and Grogu, and now you were taking care of his old ones.

Din could fold them nicely, but he couldn’t use an iron to save his life, so you offered to do that before he’d somehow burn another shirt. And also the fingers he hadn’t burned yet.

As he folded his jumpsuit, a small giggle from you made him look up, at first thinking he was doing something wrong again. But you were actually looking at his cape that you had just finished ironing.

“It’s in a miserable state. I know.” He admitted.

“No, it’s not that. I mean, yes, it is in a miserable state. But I was thinking about the fact that you still have it.” You told him, turning off the iron now that you were done with it. “When you first arrived a few days ago, I noticed that it was the same one that I gave you. But part of me wasn’t so sure, especially because it’s been so long. Now that I’m seeing it up close, I can tell it really is the same cape.” You grinned.

Din blushed a little under the helmet. The cape was in such a poor state he didn’t think you would notice it was still the one you’d given to him; the ends were jagged, the deep color had faded, some bits were torn and others were stretched. Not to mention a patch that had burned off from one of the times he’d used his back jet.

“I couldn’t bring myself to part with it.” He admitted in a low voice, not looking at you, finishing to fold his jumpsuit.

You smiled either way; you knew exactly what he meant. You also still had something he’d given to you a long time ago.

“I have something, too” you said as you rushed up the stairs.

After grabbing it from your nightstand’s drawer, you head back downstairs and walk up to him, holding what seems to be a simple piece of cloth.

“Couldn’t bring myself to part with it either” you confess, holding the little cloth up in your hands for him.

“No way!” He said in contained surprise, picking the piece up from your hands.

It was a sleep mask he had given you around a year after you’d given him his cape. It used to be black, but it was a grey-ish shade now. The hem around the eye area was worn out and had a small tear in it; the band had come undone and was stitched back in place on one side; and the elastic band had a knot on the back, having lost its elasticity a long time ago. He giggled at the state of the mask; it was a perfect match for his destroyed cape.

He hadn’t bought the mask for you so you could sleep better in a darker ambient – that would be a plus. In fact, he had quite the opposite use for it: he wanted you to be able to see him. His Mandalorian vows kept him from showing his face to you or anyone else, but nothing had ever been said about touching his face. And, Maker, was he touch starved.

That was then. Now, he had ten years of starvation built up in him, and the feeling was becoming almost unbearable. Every time your hands brushed; every warmth coming from you when you’d stand too close; every night when he laid on your bed, resting his head on your pillows and covering himself with your sheets; every time he watched you fix whatever it was in your workshop, skin glistening with sweat, the muscles of your arms flexing as you skillfully fixed something back in place; whenever Grogu made you laugh; all the times you’d smile up at him. He felt like taking off his helmet and showering your face and neck with kisses, only to then kiss your lips that seemed to be the only thing capable of putting down his fire.

But he couldn’t.

Or rather,

He was unsure.

After pondering for a while as he watched the sleep mask on his hands, he takes an encouraging breath and carefully slides the mask through your head and over your eyes.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

11 years ago

You had just arrived home from an afternoon of grocery shopping. Din had his full armor on, as he always did whenever he left your house to somewhere else. Whenever he was around and it was time for shopping, he’d obviously come along, helping to carry the bags on the way back, especially the heavier ones. It was a simple thing, an everyday life task. But it was cute to you, like everything else he did. Well, except fighting and killing. That was… hot. But apart from cute, it was also quite funny: it looked like you had your own madly skilled body guard to watch over you as you bought rice.

Right now, you were in the kitchen, taking the groceries off the bags so you could store them away.

“I, um, bought you something.” He said.

“Oh?” You turned to him.

You did notice when he had suddenly vanished from your side at the market street, only to just as suddenly show back up, making you jump a little when he spoke to you from behind as you picked the best plums. He was incredibly silent for someone his size wearing literal metal clothes.

“Here.” He handed you a folded black piece of fabric. “They didn’t have gift wraps, so, um… yeah.”

“Don’t bother with that.” You reassured him and proceeded to unfold the rather thick fabric; it was a sleep mask. “Oh, this is nice” you ran your fingers through it, feeling how soft it was. “Thank you, Din!” you smiled up at him.

“I- I was thinking, um—” he cleared his throat. “I had this idea—” he was suddenly nervous, and you couldn’t tell why. “Can I?” he pointed at the sleep mask on your hands.

“Uh- yeah. Sure.” You handed it to him, a little confused. He picked it up.

“Here. Excuse me…” he said as he slided the mask over your head, fixing it in place while being careful with your eyes and hair. “There we go.”

“Ooh, pitch black.” You said and waited to see what his next move would be.

You heard something being placed on the countertop followed by a very soft shuffling. Unexpectedly, you felt his bare hands on your wrists, lifting your hands up to around your chest level, softly, and stopping there.

“We’ve—we’ve known each other for about a year and a half now. And I know you very well. The way you look, that is.” You could hear the nervousness in his voice, and you were starting to get anxious too, uncertain of what was going on exactly. But you let him keep talking. “You… Don’t know me. Only bits of me: my hands, my arms. And my ribs, too, from patching them way too many times.” You two shared a soft laugh at that. “What I thought of when I saw that mask, um. Well, you can’t see me. With your eyes. But perhaps you could know me… through your touch. If—if you’d like to, of course…” His voice got lower and lower as he spoke, ending with an unsure, but hopeful whisper.

Nothing had ever been said in his creed about this. The rule was that a Mandalorian could never show his face to a living being, therefore proving their devotion. But touching, feeling… It wasn’t the same as showing, was it? He was unsure, but found logic in his thoughts.

You were surprised, heart rate going faster. Did he really mean what you thought he meant? Yes. Yes, he did. Oh, boy! What now? You wanted it. If that’s what you could have from him, then yes, you wanted all of it. But the same thoughts that occupied Din’s mind filled yours: could you really do it? Was this right? You weren’t seeing his face, but would he end up being kicked out of his creed if anyone ever found out about this? As much as you craved for it, you couldn’t bring yourself to do it, hands frozen in place as he held then. You couldn’t form a word either, so you just nodded leisurely.

That was enough for him. You heard a faint relieved sigh, and, slowly, he lifted your hands towards his face. When your fingertips touched his cheeks, he let go of your wrists, so you could feel his face at your own pace and will.

You touched him lightly at first, like he could brake and fall away from your touch if you weren’t careful enough.

You touched his cheekbones first, tracing them, and he watched in silence as you focused your whole attention to the skin of your hands. You noticed how sharp his cheekbones were, and as you lowered your hands to his jawline, you let your fingers finally press properly into his skin, without hurting or being too rough.

You ran your fingers along his jaw, making your way to his chin, building the image of a strong, square shaped face in your mind, his beard barely there, probably shaved this morning. With your thumbs, you traced the curves of his lips, not too thin and not too full, a curved, deep lip bow. You raised your hands to his forehead, and he closed his eyes to focus on your touch, holding his hands firmly on his sides as to not give in and pull you closer. You could feel very fine, barely there lines on his forehead and between his eyebrows; he probably did furrow his brows a lot, as you had imagined. Your fingers traced his thick eyebrows, and, with care, you lowered them to his eyes, feeling just slightly as to not end up hurting him. His eyes were deep set, and his lashes not too long. At last, you traced your index finger down the bridge of his nose. It was tall and curved, a contrast to the sharper features of his face, but just as strong. Finally, you ran your fingers through his hair. It was thin, a bit wavy, not too long, and incredibly soft. So, so soft. You could run your hands through the strands and curl each lock around your fingers for hours.

It all fit him. He was strong, gentle, firm when he needed to be, and soft as he opened up to you. And so were his physical features. Everything matched.

“What’s your hair color?” you whispered, not knowing if you were allowed to ask that or not. You already knew his skin color, and you loved every time you got to see it. And now that you had the chance to build a better image of him in your brain, you couldn’t just let it pass.

“Black.” he whispered back, finally opening his eyes to look at you again, enjoying the feeling of your hands cradling his face.

“And what’s your eye color?”

“Deep brown.” He answered, wishing that he could look at your shiny eyes without the helmet on.

“Any beauty marks?” you wondered.

“Just a small one” he said, taking your right hand and lowering it to the left side on his neck “around here.” You felt the small vibrations on his neck as he spoke.

“You’re beautiful” you finally said, in awe and still whispering. But your compliment was met with a small scoff.

“You can’t really see me to know.” He spoke.

“I don’t need to. Never did.” It was true. He was beautiful to you, no matter what he looked like. But now that you got the chance to see him through your touch, you were more sure than ever.

You spent a few more seconds like that; him watching you, taking in your real colors and every little detail, nothing the visor of his helmet could ever reproduce, big hands over yours. And you, with your hands still on him, the left one ever so slightly caressing the back of his neck, feeling his hot skin against yours, and replaying the memory of your touch on him, picturing him.

At last, he lowered your hands from him, cradled your face, and placed a warm, lasting kiss to your forehead, catching you by surprise.

He smiles at your little reaction to him, but you don’t see it.

You hear metal brush against the surface of the counter, and soon after he reaches for the sleep mask on you, taking it off. You blink a few times, adjusting to the light, and look up at him, helmet back on.

He hands you back the mask, and when he takes his hands away from it, he lifts one of them to your chin, pressing it slightly to close your agape mouth. You hadn’t realized your lips were parted until he did so.

He lets out a small snort and turns around, going back to taking the groceries off the bags.

You turn too, tucking the sleep mask on your pocket and gathering a few items to put away, trying to get yourself back together.

The room is silent, but whatever is swirling all over in your bodies and minds is turbulent and deafening.

If you got this far into my fanfic, please let me know! ☺😊

Taglist:

@scorpio-marionette

@supernaturalgirl20

@misspearlssideblog

@becksxoxo

@eylaudie

@janebby

#the mandalorian #star wars #sw #din djarin #din djarin fluff #the mandalorian fluff #the mandalorian x you #the mandalorian x reader #din djarin x you #din djarin x reader #tbobf #slow burn #the mandalorian fanfiction #grogu #pedro pascal #sturkillerbase #sturkiller writes #it's all coming back to me in waves

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fruitcoops · 4 years

Note

Hi!! So I was listening to paper rings by Taylor Swift today and the lyric 'I like shiny things but I'd marry you with paper rings' made me think of coops and o'knutzy. Could you write a prompt about this?! <3

This song is so perfect for Coops and it’s the best way to start of the long-awaited wedding series! Yay! Sweater Weather credit goes to @lumosinlove!

Combined with:

1. Domestic Coops

2. Remus making fun of Sirius’ initials

3. Sirius trying to make Remus moan while he’s on the phone with his folks

4. From @colored-rain: Taking Hattie to the vet

TW for mild smutty content, taking a pet to the vet, and the inherent stress of wedding planning

I: Six Weeks Before the Wedding

“Where are we even going to do this?” Sirius asked, running a hand through his hair.

Remus shook his head silently, pressing his forehead into the wooden edge of the table. “What if we elope?”

“Celeste would skin us both.”

“True. Oh, god, my dad would cry if we did that.” Remus slid down in his seat and stared up with sad eyes. “Can’t we just be married already?”

“I could get tinfoil from the kitchen and just…” Sirius mimed wrapping it around his ring finger and Remus snorted.

“Baby, I would marry you with paper rings, but I think we want them to last.”

“You like shiny things!”

“I do, that doesn’t mean I want tinfoil on my hand for the rest of my life,” Remus laughed, pulling him in for a quick kiss. “Alright, let’s go through our list again. We agreed on small, right?”

“Just the team and families. We still want it to be outside?”

“Yep.” Remus checked off two boxes on the piece of paper they had been grappling with for the past four days. “Rings have already been ordered?”

“I’m doing that this afternoon. What kind of cake do we want?”

“Uhhh…an edible one?” Remus shrugged. “I don’t have a huge preference. Chocolate is really good but all the ones from the store are spongy.”

“Wow, an edible cake, so original,” Sirius teased. “We can ask Celeste what she thinks.”

“Good plan.” He paused for a moment. “Where outside will we do it? We need an actual venue. I think people would be upset if we just had a wedding in a public park.”

“The media would be all over it, too.” Sirius scrunched his nose up in thought just as their timer went off and both sighed as they headed for the door. “It’s going to be hard to focus on practice when we know next to nothing about the wedding we’ve been planning for over six months.”

“We’re disasters.”

II: Four Weeks Before the Wedding

“We’re not putting that on the cards.”

“Why not?” Sirius frowned and looked down at the mock-up invitation. “It’s our initials. It’s cute.”

Remus blinked at him. “Sirius. Your initials.”

“Do you not want my initials on our joint wedding invitation?”

“I would love to have your initials on our joint wedding invitation, except for the part where it’s the same acronym as ‘son of a bitch’.”

Sirius paused, then groaned and put his hands over his face. “Fuck, I forgot about that.”

“You forgot your own initials?”

“I forgot the son of a bitch thing!”

“Okay, I clearly don’t tease you enough for that,” Remus snickered, wrapping an arm around his waist to kiss his cheek. “Alright, attempt number eight is a bust.”

III: Three Weeks Before the Wedding

Sirius ran his fingers gently through Remus’ hair, feeling him shift in the darkness. “What’s on your mind, mon amour?”

“Are we changing our last names?”

“Did we…not discuss that?” Sirius wracked his brain, but it was so exhausted from wedding topics that he came up empty.

“I don’t think so.” Remus scooted around so he was on his side, facing Sirius. “Both our names are super connected to our jobs. Plus, Lupin-Black might be a little long for jerseys.”

“I’d rather not go through the whole name-change process.” There was a beat of quiet. “Though I do like the sound of Sirius Lupin.”

Remus’ breath audibly caught and he leaned closer to Sirius, nuzzling against his shoulder. “I love you.”

“I love you, too.”

IV: Eighteen Days Before the Wedding

Remus’ back hit the mattress with a soft bounce that was quickly stilled by Sirius’ weight pressing him down by the hips, his mouth skimming along all the right places on Remus’ neck. “Yes,” he hissed as Sirius ground down, their bare chests bumping together. He dipped his hands beneath the waistband of Sirius’ sweats and he shivered, nipping the hinge of his jaw.

“Wait,” Sirius gasped, pulling back to straddle Remus’ waist.

“What? Is this a flamingo moment?” Remus panted, still buzzing with arousal.

“Did we invite your parents to the wedding?”

Remus stared at him in disbelief. “Are you fucking kidding me right now?”

“I don’t think we did.”

“Sirius, you are literally about to—holy fuck, did we invite my parents?”

“I don’t know!”

Remus groaned and let his head fall back against the pillows before tapping Sirius’ hip and swinging his legs over the edge of the mattress. He grabbed his phone off the nightstand and dialed his mother’s number, taking a few deep breaths to collect himself as it rang.

“Hello?”

“Hey, mom, how’s it going?”

“Oh, it’s going fine out here. How’s wedding planning?” Hope asked. Remus could hear her smiling.

“That’s what I’m calling about, actually. Did you—” He bit his lip as Sirius’ fingertips trailed up his thigh. “Uh, did you get an invitation?”

Hope was silent for a moment, save for a few rustling sounds. “Now that you mention it, I don’t think so. Lyall! Honey, did Re send us a wedding invitation?” There was a low humming noise as his father responded. “He says we didn’t get one.”

Remus winced. “Sorry about that. I can text you the details, if you want.”

“Will you mail one as well? I want to put it in our memory box.”

Sirius’ hand slid further along Remus’ leg, growing closer to his inner thigh by the second and doing nothing to quell his frayed nerves. “Yeah—yeah, mom, we totally can.”

“Are you alright? You sound a bit out of breath.”

“Hattie was running around and being a little crazy.” Remus covered the speaker with his hand and turned to glare at Sirius, who grinned and kissed his cheekbone.

“Okay,” Hope sounded skeptical. “So you’re not getting sick or anything?”

“Nope. Healthy as a horse.” The last word came out a little breathless as Sirius licked a stripe up his neck and bit down on the junction to his shoulder, making Remus’ eyes flutter closed. He smacked Sirius’ hand halfheartedly and felt him grin.

“How’s Sirius doing?”

“Fine, he’s fine. We’re a little stressed with the wedding planning and everything, but things are good here.” Really good, he thought as the heel of Sirius’ hand pressed down just next to his dick. He swallowed down a moan and squeezed his eyes shut. “Alright, I’ll text the details to you this afternoon love you mom bye.”

“Love you t—”

A millisecond after the call ended, Remus slammed his phone into the nightstand and pushed Sirius into the sheets, bracketing his face with his elbows. “What the fuck was that?”

“I’m just keeping things interesting.” Sirius tugged his lower lip between his teeth and smirked, which really left Remus with only one option: kissing him senseless until he couldn’t even remember his own name.

V: Three Days Before the Wedding

Sirius’ leg bounced up and down nervously and he gripped Remus’ hand as they waited in the lobby of the vet’s office. “She’ll be okay.” His voice was noticeably higher than usual and he cleared his throat. “She’ll be fine. It’s just a cough.” A cough that’s been going on for four and a half days.

Remus hummed his agreement, though he hadn’t stopped twisting Hattie’s leash in his hands since they arrived. “Just a cough. Probably a cold, or—or something like that.”

The doors ahead opened and both of them stood as Hattie trotted out next to the vet tech, who looked rather amused. “What’s wrong with her?” Sirius asked, scanning her for any signs of illness. “Is she alright?”

“She is a very talented actress,” the vet said, rubbing Hattie behind the ears. She whined pitifully and cuddled into Sirius’ side. “Have you two been busy lately?”

“We’re planning for our wedding.” Remus looked as confused as Sirius felt. “Why?”

“Because Miss Hattie here is one of the healthiest, snuggliest dogs I’ve ever seen.”

“But she was coughing.”

“She was faking.” The vet knelt next to her and petted down her back, raising an eyebrow. “Weren’t you, munchkin?”

“Hattie!” Sirius exclaimed, torn between relief and shock. “You little monster!”

Remus frowned and tapped her forehead lightly as he slid her leash on over her head. “We were so worried about you! Why would you do that?”

“She’s probably been sulking because you’re busy with wedding stuff,” the vet said with a smile. “Quite the drama queen you’ve got there.”

“Tell me about it,” Sirius huffed as he kissed her head. “Don’t ever do that again, young lady. You’re in big trouble when we get home.”

“Thank you for your help,” Remus said, shaking the vet’s hand. “We really appreciate it and we’re so sorry for wasting your time.”

“Are you kidding? She was the best part of my day,” he laughed. “All the other techs can’t stop talking about Hattie cuddles now. Have a good one, you three.”

+1: The Lions, the Media, and the Locker Room

Word spread like wildfire in media circles, and the rumor mill had never worked harder once news of the Black-Lupin wedding came out.

Naturally, the Lions decided to have a little fun with it.

“Pots! Pots, what can you tell us about Black and Lupin’s wedding?” Four different microphones were shoved into his personal space, but James put on his best confused face.

“What wedding?”

A wave of murmuring spread through the reporters. “So you weren’t invited to Sirius Black and Remus Lupin’s wedding?”

“There’s a wedding?”

Across the room, two other interviewers mobbed Thomas Walker in his stall. “Talker, do you know anything about Black and Lupin’s wedding?”

“Who?” he asked with a perfect act of innocence.

“Sirius Black and Remus Lupin.”

He bit his lip. “I don’t think I know them, sorry. Are they fans?”

“Talkie!” Remus tossed him a towel from the adjacent stall, and he caught it with a grin.

“Heads up, Loops!” Talker threw it right back and headed toward the ice baths with a wink to the cameras. “Good chat, guys.”

One of the interviewers muttered under their breath and hurried over to Pascal, who was still unlacing his skates. “Dumo, when is the wedding between Sirius Black and Remus Lupin?”

Dumo frowned. “Quoi?”

“The wedding. You were invited, yes?”

“Desole, je ne parle pas l’anglais,” he said regretfully. “C’est un…wedding?”

“Yes, the wedding between your teammates.”

“These words, I don’t know them.” His French accent was almost comically thick as he shook his head. “Desole.”

Out of view of the cameras, Sirius gave him a thumbs-up and reached over to high-five Pots.

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