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alecmagnuslwb · 5 years

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New Year’s Eve: Chapter One

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One magical night, five intertwining love stories, all culminating at midnight with just maybe some confessions and kisses as the clock strikes.

So, you know those cheesy rom-coms about holidays, that’s exactly what this is. Over the next six days, six chapters each focusing on a duo of some sort will culminate on New Year’s Eve with the midnight chapter were it all comes together and there might be a few smooches :)

This chapter: Magnus & Alec, and here’s the thing Magnus loves Alec, Alec loves Magnus, but they’re currently broken up and being a little stubborn about those very blatant two facts.

***

11 a.m. New Year’s Eve

“Fine! I’ll do it!” Alec shouts into the phone as Aline rattles on to her literal forty-fifth reason why he should cater this event so last minute on New Year’s Eve. He’s already looking at the designated menu set up by the previous chef that Aline had emailed him around reason twenty-two and planning what changes he wants to make.

“There’s no need to shout,” she teases on the other end of the line. Alec hears the sounds of taxis and eager tourists around his friend, no doubt on her way to one of the at least ten events her family’s company is in charge of this evening.

“Pretty sure it’s the only way you’d stop talking,” Alec grins as he shuts his laptop forwarding the menu changes to his temporary staff for the evening. He moves from his kitchen to his bedroom to get dressed.

He had planned on doing absolutely nothing tonight, his restaurant is closed until the third so the staff can enjoy their holiday, which will allow him to let the New Year pass him by and the hellish past year he’s had get left in the dust, but now evidently he’ll be the head chef for Edom Records most exclusive party of the year. It’s a party he would usually avoid like the damn plague, but he knows for a fact a certain someone he used to date won’t be there. Last he checked he who shall not be named was in Ibiza for the New Year partying away a three month-long gap before his tour starts again. Not that Alec checks his ex’s Instagram every single morning or anything.

Aline huffs a laugh, “You’re a saint, Alec. An absolute saint to Sebastian Morgenstern’s devil.”

Alec scoffs, “His food sucks anyways and you know it.” Sebastian Morgenstern has been a thorn in Alec’s side since culinary school, his talent is subpar at best but daddy’s money and name in the entertainment industry has kept him working.

“Yeah, but people act like they love it cause it’s on trend,” Aline says the sound of a door slamming coming from her end as she seemingly slips into a cab. “Now that won’t matter cause the food will be genuinely good.”

Alec’s about to respond with a thanks, still in disbelief that people think he’s actually good at his job when another ringing comes from Aline’s end of the phone.

“Damn,” she says no doubt one of her five other phones ringing. “I’ve gotta go, I owe you big for this, be at the hotel within the hour and I’ll drop by this afternoon to check in before I have to be at Times Square.”

“See you,” he starts, but she’s already hung up on him. He shrugs completely unoffended by the act as he pulls his chef whites from the closet.

***

Catarina chuckles as she looks down at her phone from her seat beside Magnus in the limousine.

“What’s so amusing?” he asks idly and somewhat nervously twisting the silver arrow ring on his right ring finger that was a gift from the man he never should have let go. He still wears it every single day, even if it breaks his heart a little bit every time he slips it on.

“I just figured out why you insisted I accept the abysmal paycheck you’re getting for tonight’s performance twenty minutes after landing back in the city,” his manager and best friend smirks. Magnus feigns disinterest. He knew she’d figure him out, but he doesn’t have to acknowledge it just yet.

“I have no idea what you’re talking about, it’s something fun to do,” he shrugs. “It’s not all about money.”

“Oh, that second thing is true, but you don’t give a damn about the fun of this performance and we both know it,” she says tilting her phone in his direction. On the screen is a mass email from Aline about the change in chef for the event tonight. He’s only received one text from Aline in the last nine months, her camp firmly on his ex’s side in the breakup. That text had been about twenty minutes ago.

Magnus huffs as he glances at the screen, “So, I don’t make all my decisions based around him.”

“No, you don’t,” she says kindly. “But, you’ve been a pining mess every moment you’re not on stage the last nine months regretting how you walked away the last time you saw him. So, this decision is decidedly based entirely around him.”

She’s right. Magnus can’t keep up a façade and act like she isn’t right. When Gretel, the original headliner for the party, came down with the flu he was ready to turn it down without question when Catarina got the call not even twenty minutes after he’d landed back in the city from what had been a decidedly unfun trip to Ibiza he’d chosen to cut short. But then a simple text from Aline came through.

Chef backed out last minute too, Alec’s his replacement. Try not to fuck it up this time.

His answer shifted immediately. Losing Alec, letting him go was the worst decision of his life. The tour hadn’t allowed him any opportunity to reach out face to face and this, this had to be his moment. Even if it all went up in flames.

“I have to try,” he replies practically whispering it scared if he says it too loud he’ll become too hopeful. The truth is he doesn’t know what Alec’s been up to the last nine months, he’s never been one for social media, only ever posting about his restaurant and aside from friendly contact with Alec’s mother and sister who never really talk about Alec he’s been all but marooned away from that once prominent portion of his life. For all he knows Alec’s moved on, has some new boyfriend that doesn’t cut and run when things get too serious. He’s terrified he well and truly blew it.

Catarina turns, grabbing his fidgety hands between hers, “I know you do, sweetheart. I know you do.” She says it in her most motherly voice, the one she always uses when Madzie needs to be uplifted. It makes him feel both seven years old and extremely comforted.

Magnus smiles squeezing her hands in thanks and changes the subject not wanting to dwell and just wanting to get on with it, heartbreak or heart healed.

“Did we sort out the band?”

“All your usual’s,” Catarina replies releasing his hands. “Except we’re short a backup singer, evidently Maureen dumped her latest boyfriend and has run away to California, possibly permanently.”

Magnus rolls his eyes, of course she has. “Call Isabelle,” he says without question.

Catarina lifts a brow, “You sure? If you’re attempts to woo her brother go amiss that might not go your way.”

Magnus shakes his head, “Whatever happens between me and Alec, she and I will still be on good terms professionally. She’s got a hell of a voice, call her.”

Catarina nods reaching for her phone distracted with scrolling through her contacts to find Isabelle as the limo driver knocks on the window signaling they’re about to arrive at their destination. It gives Magnus a moment to breathe a deep collecting breath and give himself a mini internal pep talk as they pull up outside of the hotel.

***

The kitchen is moving shockingly quite smoothly for having a different chef in charge of it not even three full hours ago. Alec knows a few of the cooks hired on for the night, so the shift to his new updated menu hasn’t been the tough transition he expected it to be. It’s already nearing two o’clock and the party will start to have guests arriving as early as 6:30. Things are on an easy track that means dinner will began at exactly 7:30. An hour and a half before the headliner takes the stage.

He rattles off a few instructions to the line with a smile before turning to see Aline standing just inside the kitchen door head tilted with a smile of her own.

“I knew you’d enjoy doing this,” she says all too smug. “No matter how much you complained this morning, I knew you’d enjoy it.”

“Shut up,” he says wiping his hands down on a towel before moving towards her.

“All going well?” she asks as Alec reaches out a hand pushing the door open behind her and sliding past her to walk out into the main hall where it’s quieter and they can talk. He nods opening his mouth to tell her everything is running smoothly when he stops dead in his tracks, Aline bumping into his back.

Across the room he sees him just walking in, Catarina right beside him. He hasn’t seen Magnus, the real Magnus not the one his social media team presents to the world, in nine months. He looks a little tired, a little bit like the light he always had in him has dimmed but no less handsome than he always had been.

Alec shakes his head of the thoughts. He shouldn’t care what Magnus looks like, shouldn’t be worried that he looks tired. Magnus left him. He should hate him. He wishes he could hate him.

“Ow,” Aline says rubbing her forehead that had likely bounced into his shoulder blade at his abrupt stop.

“Sorry,” he says a little distracted his eyes still trained on Magnus. Magnus hasn’t noticed him yet, if he turns around right now he can avoid this altogether. He turns to do just that when Magnus finally looks up and spots him, his eyes going soft and completely unreadable. Alec hates that, he used to always be able to read Magnus’ expressions.

“Nu, uh,” Aline says gripping his forearm tight as he tries to make his exit. “Talk to him.” She says it soft and encouraging and all too knowing.

“You knew?” he asks even though he’s fairly certain he already knows the answer. “When you asked me to fill in this morning, you already knew?”

Aline gives him a look that decidedly means she thinks he’s stupid.

“Of course I knew, dipshit,” she says as she loosens her grip, eyes moving over briefly to where Magnus is no doubt nearing closer to them. “You weren’t the only last-minute headliner replacement today.”

“Why would you, “Alec starts a gaze steely and probably harsher than deserved trained on Aline.

“Because you’ve been miserable, Alec,” she cuts him off. “And even without confirmation about it from Cat, it’s clear from the PR smoke show his team puts up on social media he has been too.”

Alec pauses turning his tough gaze away from his friend. Aline wouldn’t lie to him, and he begrudgingly admits she’s never wrong. But Magnus left, not Alec, if he has been so damn miserable these past nine months he’s the one who could have fixed it.

“Give him a chance, I know I was full team you in the breakup, but I think he just got scared and I think if you hear him out maybe there’s a chance to fix this,” Aline continues as if she can read his thoughts. “He wouldn’t have taken the job tonight if he didn’t want to try and fix this. He would have run away the second he saw your name like you’re trying to do right now.”

Alec lets her words sink in, a bit of the tension releasing from his shoulders. He has to concede that maybe she has point.

“Alexander,” an achingly familiar voice says from behind him. The tension he’d just released seeps right back in. Fuck, he can’t do this. Can’t hear his name said like that.

Aline jumps in first greeting Magnus and Catarina both with a hug as he finally turns to face his ex head on. Seeing Magnus up close makes this worse. Because if he looked beautiful and tired from across the room it’s like staring into the sun or being right beside a patch of brightly lit stars seeing him up close.

“Magnus,” he says no preamble being sure to keep any sort of emotion out of his voice. They just stare at one another only a few feet of distance between them that feels like miles from the physical and emotional gap that’s formed between them over the last nine months.

Catarina and Aline look between them and share a raised eyebrow before Cat jumps in the middle.

“Hey, Alec,” she says fondly reaching up to hug him. His tension falls a bit again, happily hugging her back.

“Hey, Cat. How are Madzie and Dot?” he asks. Because he can do this. He can have friendly conversation with Cat about her daughter and her wife and ignore the piercing gaze of Magnus’ deep brown eyes.

“They’re good,” she smiles fondly as she pulls back from his embrace. “Madzie’s growing like a damn tree every time I turn around. She misses you.”

And damn if that isn’t a punch to the gut. That’s the thing about breakups, you don’t just lose one person you lose a galaxy of people you’ve come to care about.

“I miss her too,” he says with a sad smile. “You all should come by the restaurant some night when I’m actually there, it’d be great to see her and Dot.”

He spends more of his time managing his restaurant than running its kitchen these days. It’s a nice way to figure out what he wants to do next, but he still loves getting in the kitchen when he can. And he’d be more than happy to do so if it meant making a meal for three people who he always had affection for and doesn’t get to see anymore.

She nods turning to Aline to talk a few party logistics that Alec decides to act like he cares about to ignore Magnus’ not so subtle attempts to get him to look his way.

“Well I should get going,” Aline says looking at Alec with a frustrated nudge of her elbow into his side. Alec just glares. She loops her arms through Cat’s pulling her along with her.

“We can talk and walk,” she says stepping away. “Good to see you Magnus!” She tosses a wave and another pointed look at Alec over her shoulder as she goes.

Alec turns to Magnus finally and really looks at him. His hair’s a little disheveled like he’s been running his hands through it nervously, his makeup is a little smudged. He’s beautiful and Alec wishes he wasn’t so damn affected by the fact. His arms are crossed protectively across his middle which Alec could almost laugh at; shouldn’t he be the one protecting himself from Magnus?

“I should get back to the kitchen,” he nods moving to do just that.

“Wait, Alexander,” Magnus says unfolding his arms reaching out to grab Alec but stopping at the last second. Alec takes a deep breath and stops, trying to do exactly what Aline said he should do.

“We should talk about what happened, that fight we had the last time we saw each other,” Magnus continues. Alec can’t help but let out a rough laugh at his words.

“That fight?”

He can’t do this. He can’t talk about this if Magnus really is just going to call it a fight. Like they argued about who’s turn it was to do the dishes, not the absolute shattering of their relationship when Magnus told him he couldn’t do this anymore. That what they had couldn’t survive his lifestyle.

Something shudders in Magnus at Alec’s harsh tone. This time he can read him, there’s a look in his eyes that says he knows that that choice of words wasn’t right.

“I’d call the complete shattering of our relationship when you left me and broke my damn heart a little more than a fight,” Alec says harshly letting his thoughts out in a short clipped tone.

Magnus squeezes his eyes shut and for a second Alec thinks there might be tears.

“That was the wrong choice of words, I know, I keep messing this up,” he starts he looks ready to keep going when a young woman with a few garment bags comes over and interrupts.

“We’re ready for you, Mr. Bane,” she says then looks at Alec.

“Yeah,” Magnus nods to her never breaking his eyes away from Alec. “Just give us a minute.”

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to interrupt,” she says sheepishly.

“You didn’t interrupt anything,” Alec responds quickly. Feeling a little bad he’s just put this girl in between them. Magnus looks ready to protest, but Alec marches on. “Go ahead, we’re both here to do a job that’s it. I mean we never could survive your lifestyle, right?”

Magnus looks genuinely sorry for a moment, before he puts on the Magnus Bane pop star mask for the girl beside him who’s looking increasingly uncomfortable. Alec shuts off turning before Magnus can say anything else. He knows that throwing Magnus’ own words back in his face is a little petty and a lot angry, but he hasn’t gotten to be either of those things at Magnus. He’s felt them, like when he sold the leather jacket Magnus left behind that he knows is worth thousands of dollars to the most asinine waiter he’s ever hired for only eight bucks, but he’s never gotten to really express them towards Magnus. One day they were in love, the object of his tour looming over them, but a seeming non-issue and the next Magnus was gone.

Maybe it’s unfair, maybe it’s going exactly against the advice Aline tried to give him, but he needs to get it out. Because after months of silence and heartbreak maybe being angry at Magnus face to face has to come before he can even entertain the idea of hearing him out.

***

Alec barely even looks at him during the few minutes of their encounter and when he does he shuts off completely. It’s not the hazel gaze of love he grew so accustomed to seeing, it’s a stone-cold empty look purposefully shown to make him seem unaffected.

Magnus hates it.

Alec looks as gorgeous as ever in his chef whites. He still wears that damn silver band on his right pointer finger that Magnus fully believes serves no purpose other than to drive him crazy with how sexy the simple accessory always is and that cute eyebrow scar of his still stands out strikingly. His hairs a little longer than it had been curling at the edges and the beard Magnus had grown very fond of has been shaved. But he’s still beautiful even when he looks like he’d rather any other person on the planet was in the room with him than Magnus.

He tries his damndest to get Alec to stay to talk now instead of later, but he uses the interruption of wardrobe as an out, throwing some of the last words Magnus had ever said to him right back at him. It stings, but it’s nothing he doesn’t deserve. He is the one who called it quits with no warning, Alec has every right to be angry with him.

He glazes through the wardrobe talks. Catarina comes back in eventually and eyes him warily. She can clearly see things didn’t go well after she and Aline conspiratorially sauntered off. He picks an outfit that very purposefully will expose his collarbone and the tattoo that still rests there and makes a game plan with his hair and makeup team all the while thinking about how in one fumbled word choice he may have fucked up any chance of Alec hearing him out.

***

Alec aggressively cuts carrots on the counter to attempt to avoid thinking about Magnus, the entire staff wisely avoiding him as he does it. He’s so distracted he doesn’t even notice he’s cut every damn carrot in the kitchen while thinking about Magnus the entire time and tosses his knife down heavily. He silenced his phone as soon as he stepped back into the kitchen assuming every buzz was from Aline, Catarina or his sister who are no doubt in cahoots with this whole plan encouraging him.

He rubs absently at his collarbone where a tattoo reading ‘Aku Cinta Kamu,’ Indonesian for I love you, rests in simple script. He and Magnus had gotten them on a whim one night after a few too many shots of tequila as a reminder of their undying love. Some undying love he huffs to himself moving his hand away from the spot.

He never got it removed as a reminder that one should never get a matching tattoo with a boyfriend no matter how in love they may be. Or at least that’s what he tells himself. The reality is he’s both terrified of the concept of lasering it away and a deeper part of him is terrified of moving on. He’s pretty sure that Magnus is the love of his life and lasering away that tattoo would mean even the love of his life hadn’t lasted. He doesn’t want to move on, it’s why he’s been on exactly one tragic date in nine months, but it’s also why he doesn’t want to hear Magnus out right now, because he’s still so damn mad.

He knows that doesn’t add up logically, but logic isn’t really at the forefront for him right now.

He can’t focus on it all right now. On how, despite it being completely in his head, he feels a throbbing current under the tattoo all because of Magnus’ proximity. Can’t focus on wondering not nearly as absently as he’d like to if Magnus still has his in the same exact spot. He has a kitchen to run, a dinner to serve, that has to be his focus right now.

Aline said he should give Magnus a chance. And maybe she’s right, but he just can’t right now. He can’t get his heartbroken tonight, when he just barely survived it the last time.

***

Hours pass, literal painstaking hours and not once does Alec step out of the kitchen. Every time the door swing open he hopes to see an angry 6’3 chef who currently probably hates him, but he doesn’t. Waiters, other chefs and a million other people he doesn’t recognize come barreling out, but never the one person he wants to see.

Guests will be arriving soon, with dinner not even an hour away. He’s dressed and made up and rehearsing with his band, knowing his brain should be on the songs and the set list, but instead all he’s thinking about is a damn kitchen door.

“Alright, let’s take five,” Cat announces hopping on the stage and making a b-line for Magnus.

“Give him time,” she says pulling the mic to the side so it doesn’t pick up either of their voices.

Magnus shifts his gaze from the kitchen door to her.

“It’s been almost five hours,” Magnus says dejectedly.

Catarina huffs, “You know you could just go back there, right? Instead of staring at a door and missing lines of songs you’ve been singing for years when it so much as cracks opens.”

Magnus rolls his eyes at his best friend, “Yeah, not gonna happen. You didn’t stick around for the first conversation we’ve had in months, but if you had you’d know he very much does not want me going back in there to talk to him.”

“Magnus, I love you,” Cat says putting her hands on his shoulders.

“I love you too,” he says on instinct even though he knows from her posture he’s about to get an absolute talking to.

“And because I love you,” she says with a smile. “It is my job to tell you you’re being a complete dumbass.”

“Harsh.”

She gives him a pointed look, “Maybe, but it’s true. So, he doesn’t want to talk. Fine. Then find another way to communicate with him. You came here tonight to try and fix this, to make it right and stop moping around about losing the love of your life. So, don’t just stare at a door. The Magnus Bane I know is not a door starer he’s a doer. So, do something, if he’s not ready to hear you out on the big stuff yet, then find a way to start with the small stuff. He’s the only person you’ve ever been with that appreciated your cheesy, dorky ass side. So use that. Or hell spell out ‘I’m sorry’ in shrimp cocktails if that’s what it takes.”

Magnus laughs at that. The first genuine laughs he’s let out all day.

Catarina smiles squeezing his shoulders fondly before dropping her hands.

“Just don’t take all damn night to get there, because if you don’t do this tonight you might never get another chance to. Also, if you don’t do this by a reasonable hour I might never get to leave this damn venue and go home to my wife and daughter for the night, so get your shit together and sort it out so I can leave after dinner, please.”

Magnus rolls his eyes, “Ah, so this all about you getting to go home then?”

Catarina punches him in the shoulder, fondly, but a little harder than necessary.

“No, it’s about my best friend being happy again,” she says seriously before continuing on with a smirk. “And it’s about me getting to go home.”

“You’re the worst,” Magnus says with a smile feeling more confident than he had a moment ago. Cat’s pep talks aren’t always the most eloquent and definitely would be taken as abrasive by people who don’t know her, but they always do the trick.

“I’m the best and you know it,” she says turning and hopping off the stage. “He’s single by the way, I asked Aline earlier since I knew it would probably be a fear you had.” She says it knowingly relieving a little of the pressure in Magnus’ chest. “Evidently you’re not the only one who tried to go on a single disastrous date and realized it was all fruitless. Now figure out a plan that better start and have some modicum of success during dinner that allows me to feel comfortable enough to leave you here alone and go watch my seven-year-old fail miserably at staying awake until midnight.”

The band slowly makes their way back onstage to continue a few more songs for rehearsal. There’s one song he won’t be rehearsing that he decides in that moment can be a part of the plan Cat wants him to devise, his latest track which is a stripped-down acoustic number that he has never actually played for a crowd. It’s about Alec. It’s for Alec. It’s an apology and love song all wrapped into one and he knows for a fact Alec has never heard it.

It’s one of the few small tidbits of his life that Isabelle has allowed him to know about in recent months. Which reminds him.

“Hey, any word from Iz?” he asks pulling the mic back over to get Cat’s attention where she’s moved across the room. Despite her quick acceptance of the last-minute job word from Isabelle has been nothing but radio silent since which is a bit worrisome. In all the time he’s known her she’s never been late for a rehearsal. Alec may run like clockwork, but Isabelle is an actual clock, constantly punctual. She shakes her head looking down at her phone.

For a moment he considers saying fuck all to his plan and just busting into the kitchen to ask Alec if he’s heard from his sister when his phone buzzes in his back pocket three times in quick succession.

[6:39 p.m. -- from: Raphael]

Your backup singer is stuck in our elevator. She’s fine.

Meliorn’s working on getting her out in time for your performance.

God knows you don’t have the talent to carry it all by yourself :)

Magnus huffs at the last text. Glad Isabelle is safe and hopefully on her way, but constantly annoyed by his friend. He texts back a quick affirmative as he relays the information to Cat, assuring Raphael tells Isabelle they won’t start without her and reminding Raphael that that last text is why Cat is his best friend and not him.

Raphael responds with a completely mature middle finger emoji.

Magnus just laughs gesturing to his band and counting them in for one more run through confident Isabelle has sang with him enough times to be able to pick it up easily once she arrives. They run through a few of his poppy upbeat tracks and he feels himself enjoying this more than he thought he would. He hits every beat and every word all while planning how exactly he intends to get Alec’s attention during dinner.

***

Alec can’t hear Magnus’ voice as the band rehearses in the main room and he’s never been more grateful for something in his life. Magnus’ voice is gorgeous and his songs are incredible, but Alec hasn’t even dared to listen to a single one since their break up. Everything comes flooding back in high def when he does, so he’d just quit, saving himself the pain.

Magnus has released a brand new single since they last saw each other, Alec doesn’t even know the title. Doesn’t care. Or more so doesn’t want to find out if it’s a break up song he wrote about him. He really doesn’t need to know if he’s become yet another man on a list with every one of Taylor Swift’s exes.

He focuses on prep and every time he’s needed outside of the kitchen he insists someone comes to him and everything that needs to be signed for that requires him passing through the main room he pettily sends his line chef Underhill to do so allowing him to avoid Magnus at all cost.

That is until the President of the Record company asks to see him in the hotel bar on the lower level to personally thank him for his last-minute fill in.

“You sure you can’t just do it?” Alec asks feebly.

“I’m 100% sure he’ll notice that I’m not you,” Underhill replies with a dumbfounded look. Alec is desperate here can’t his sort of friend respect that.

“Fine,” Alec huffs pushing off of the counter where’s he’s leaning and heads towards the door. He opens it a crack halting when he hears a note of Magnus’ voice. “Ear plugs?” he says turning to look at Underhill. “You got any?”

“Do I have ear plugs in an active busy kitchen that requires a wealth of communication and listening skills to function properly?” Underhill responds clearly questioning his boss’s sanity.

Alec nods.

“I don’t,” he says hesitating for a moment. “I know it’s not really my place, but you could just talk to him.”

Alec rolls his eyes. He’s known Underhill a while now, worked with him a handful of times over the years and they’re sort of friends. To enough of an extent that he knows he and Magnus used to date, but not to enough of an extent to know what exactly went down between them.

Not that Alec has all that clear of a picture either.

“Or I could get some ear plugs,” he says stubborn as ever. “Anybody got some ear plugs I could borrow?” he yells across the bustling kitchen.

A spectacled waitress shoots her hand up from where she stands with a few other servers and bounds his way handing Alec a pair of glowing green ear plugs.

“I always bring a few pairs to events with music, just in case it gets too loud,” she says with a shrug. Alec thinks that it’s probably deeply inefficient for a server to wear ear plugs, but he’s not going to question it in the moment.

He nods to her in thanks shoving them in his ears with a very deliberate look in Underhill’s direction. Underhill just shrugs clearly not invested enough to interfere any further.

***

Magnus rests his voice not belting the closing lines of the track on stage when the kitchen door swings open and finally Alec is the one to step through. Magnus doesn’t freeze when they make eye contact for a brief second, just watches as Alec quickly turns away and walks through the room at a rapid pace.

For a second he debates jumping completely off key and right into the song he wrote about Alec when something catches Magnus’ attention when Alec’s head turns, a bright green something.

He wishes it was a ridiculous earring or something of the like, but he knows for a fact Alec let his once pierced ears with the small silver hoops he used to sport close up after an incident with one falling into a soufflé he’d made for them one evening. Magnus had found the incident hilarious; Alec had been distressed to such a level that he threw out every earring he owned.

No, that’s not an earring. It’s an ear plug. This stubborn pain in the ass has somehow found earplugs so he doesn’t have to hear Magnus sing.

It’s a completely Alec style petty type of thing to do. A thing that were it used to avoid anyone else Magnus would find endearing. He always loved Alec’s ability to petty someone to death when they deserved it, and while he understands the reasoning he doesn’t like being on the receiving end of it.

The realization puts a decidedly large wrench in part of Magnus’ plan. He idly wonders if there’s someone here he could hire to pickpocket those damn ear plugs away from Alec.

***

Alec passes through with his ear plugs one more time and it takes everything in Magnus to not just chase after him and knock the things out of his ears. He composes himself enough however to make it dinner where he enacts phase one of his get Alec’s attention plan.

While Catarina’s shrimp cocktail idea was a little outlandish, she had made a good point about Alec always appreciating his more ridiculous side. It’s a thing he intends to use to his favor tonight.

The first course comes out to their table. A delicious little appetizer that’s perfectly done just like everything Alec cooks. When their server returns to take their finished plates Magnus lays a gentle hand on his arm holding him there for a second.

“Give my compliments to the chef,” he says with a smile and the server nods ready to take his leave. “Hold on, it’s a specific compliment, you may want to write this down.”

“Sir?” the server questions not getting out a pad to write on.

“Alright,” Magnus says turning in his seat to look at the very confused dark-haired server. “But be sure to tell him verbatim, okay?”

“Okay?” the server says with a blatant question mark at the end that Magnus happily ignores.

“Perfect,” he says clapping his hands together. “My compliments to the chef are that the appetizer was to die for and so are those hazel eyes that one could get lost in if they stare for any longer than one breath.”

Magnus beams at the waiter who looks continually confused.

“Got it?” Magnus asks.

“I think so.”

“Fantastic!” Magnus says. “I’ll write the next one down for you ahead of time just in case. What’s your name? we’re probably going to talk to each other a lot over these next few courses so we should be on the first name basis, I’m Magnus,” He says holding out a hand.

“Raj,” the waiter says shaking his hand with his free one before turning back towards the kitchen. Magnus watches as the still very confused server leaves the table.

“Really, Magnus?” Cat asks from beside him. He turns in his seat to face her.

“I’m just taking your advice,” he says with a smile taking a sip of his drink.

“And you really think having our waiter give very specific compliments to Alec is going to work?”

Magnus shrugs, “You said it yourself, he always did appreciate my more ridiculous side. I’m not saying this will definitively win him back, that’s going to take a very important song and a real difficult conversation no doubt, but hopefully this will chisel away at the angry completely avoiding me exterior and give me an in.”

Catarina nods pursing her lips in thought.

“You two always were pretty dorky about your love, this does fall in line with that.”

Magnus chuckles, “Exactly.”

***

When the server comes back from the first course and tells Alec that Magnus Bane wanted to give his compliments to the chef. He assumed that was that. Compliment received; it was just Magnus’ way of reminding Alec he’s here. Not like Alec could exactly forget, but then the server had gotten more specific relaying a compliment specifically connected less to Alec’s food and more to Alec himself.

“He said that?” Alec asks squinting an eye as he dodges another server passing by him to get the soup course out.

“He did, or something to that affect. He did ask me if I wanted to write it down and I probably should have in hindsight, sorry about that,” the server says worried.

“It’s fine,” Alec says not really sure of what to make of whatever it is Magnus is trying to accomplish here. “Tell him I said thanks.” He guesses. He really doesn’t know how to respond. When they were together Magnus was constantly showering him in compliments about anything and everything, Alec did the same to Magnus to the point that prior to their breakup the biggest fight they’d ever had was more a compliment war.

It was a charming aspect of Magnus and of their relationship. The way they both made each other feel special with the silliest and simplest of words.

After the soup course the server brings another compliment this time written on the back of a blank meal ticket.

“While soup was never my thing you always made the kind that warmed me to my core this one is no different. Also, you’ve got killer hair, which I was glad to find no strands of in my bowl.”

Alec lets out a laugh asking the server his name and then sending him on his way with another thanks.

The salad course is simple and quick and yet somehow a compliment comes his way.

Raj just hands Alec the blank ticket, blushing brightly as he exits the kitchen.

‘You can toss me anytime.’ It reads and Alec’s just shakes his head, given no more time to process the ridiculousness of it as he’s called away.

During the course of the entrée, between drink refills and varying other requests Magnus manages to send Raj back with five very different ranging compliments.

“Send my compliments to the chef, he can have anything else he’d like while we’re at it.”

“Is that tarragon I taste in the sauce? Cause I’m sure tarra-gone for you.”

“Using such a bold parmesan was a risky choice that paid off, not a surprising bit of bravery from a man who has an unexpectedly attractive tramp stamp tattoo of a fork that he lets other people see.”

Alec’s eyes go wide at that one. His deeply questionable, and very small, barely noticeable unless you’re up close with his lower back, tattoo that’d he’d gotten on drunken college night with his brother Jace as a dare isn’t something his waitstaff for the evening needs to know about. He swears Raj to secrecy on it, ensuring he never utters what he’s been told to anyone.

“Chicky, chicky parm, you’ve got nice arms,” the server read this time from scribbled pen on his forearm.

Alec guffaws at the rhyme, incapable of holding back his laughter.

“Tell him he’s insane and ridiculously corny,” Alec says shooing the server out of the kitchen.

He assumes that ridiculous rhyme is the last. Outside he can already here people moving about and there’s a guitar tuning in the distant background. He sees Raj come through the door a few plates in hand and expects him to walk over and read some ridiculous thing except this time he holds the door open Catarina trailing in behind him.

“I’m afraid our complimentary portion of the evening has come to a close,” she reads from her phone in hand. “I’ve got plenty more where those came from if you’d like to hear them sometime. XO Magnus.”

She looks up smiling at Alec. “I added the xo for the record, he thought it would seem too forward. Hilarious considering the way more sexual innuendos I had to talk him out of writing down for that poor waiter of ours to give to you.”

Alec rolls his eyes, mentally making a note to send Raj a voucher for a free dinner for two at his restaurant for putting up with the nonsense tonight.

“Did he send you back here to convince me to talk to him?” he asks busying himself with wiping down a counter that doesn’t need it. His chefs are starting to disperse and breakdown the kitchen. Dishwashers are in the back and the servers on drink duty until dessert arrives in a little while.

“He did not, I was merely sent to pass along this last message and save poor Raj the effort,” she says moving closer to lean against the counter beside where he stands. “But, I mostly came back here to see if you had any extra of that lovely appetizer that you’d be willing to share with an old friend though.”

Alec smiles moving over to another table where a few extra made dishes sit under a heat lamp. He hands her the plate and fork.

“Should still be warm,” he says as she happily takes the dish and thanks him.

“For the record though, I do think you should talk to him,” she says staying in place as Alec moves back beside her. “I know it hurt you when he left, but I also know him and I know what he wants and that he knows when he’s screwed up. And while I’m not going to tell you anything that he has to say to you himself, I do know that you’ve been miserable.”

Alec gestures ready to defend to the contrary.

“Your sister, Aline and I talk far more often than either of you are aware don’t try to deny it,” she says shutting him down. “He’s been pretty damn miserable too, and I’m the one who has to put up with it all the time so, just listen to him tonight.”

She brushes a hand down his arm comfortingly in such a motherly way that it should be patronizing, but only feels reassuring before walking away and heading back out into party.

“I was listening,” Alec says before she gets out the door completely. “To the cheesy compliments at least.”

She smiles waving her fork in his direction, “That’s a good start.” And then she’s gone the door swinging closed as Alec twists around and falls back onto the counter.

Magnus’ compliments have softened his anger a bit. He’s a bit more clear headed now to know that Aline wouldn’t set him up for heartbreak and that Catarina would never send Magnus in to something she didn’t think was right. He wants to heed their advice and listen, but there’s this part of him that’s still a little scared of what he’ll hear.

***

While the simple thanks in return from his compliments weren’t much each one gave Magnus a little more hope. Especially the one where he was specifically called insane and corny. Which is why he had to send Cat back there, just to investigate if he was making any headway.

“What did he say?” Magnus asks eagerly as soon as Cat returns a second serving of the appetizer in her hands.

“Well nothing really, I did most of the talking,” she says taking a bite of the dish.

“Cat.”

She rolls her eyes at him, “Well he did say that he’s listening at least to the compliments and got a particularly bright blush on his cheeks when I told him about the very specifically sexual compliments I had to nearly pay you not to make that poor waiter reiterate.” Now, that’s not much Magnus can admit, but it is progress. “Now, this feels like a good spot to leave you to fend for your own.” Cat says finishing off the dish of food at an alarming rate. “I’m going home to my wife and child. Good luck, have a good performance, Happy New Year and please for the love of all things if you and Alec have sex somewhere in this building tonight don’t get caught on camera, I do not want to have to deal with damage control on New Year’s Day.”

“No promises,” Magnus beams turning to his band to get ready for their set as Catarina rolls her eyes sauntering away.

***

Isabelle rushes backstage just as they’re about to start their set immediately stepping beside Magnus.

“Cutting it a little close, my dear,” Magnus says stepping over to her. “Everything okay?”

Isabelle simply nods. She looks a little frazzled, her red lipstick a little smudged, a thing Magnus has never really seen from her. He worries for a moment, but shakes the feeling assuming being trapped in an elevator for hours is bound to leave one frazzled.

“Everything okay with you?” she says leadingly. She’s no fool, it’s no doubt that much in the same way it took Cat one mention of Alec’s name to know his real reason for being here tonight, Isabelle had pieced it together the second Cat called her. Hell, it’s possible they gossiped about it while Magnus was trying to work up the nerve to walk into the building earlier in the day. Of everyone Isabelle and Maryse had remained the most neutral in the breakup both unwilling to believe Magnus just wanted to walk away. While they don’t talk about Alec and tend to keep it professional, Isabelle has definitely nudged him to take action a time or two over the past nine months.

“I’m working on it,” he says with surety.

She nods, “Good. Don’t break his heart this time.”

Magnus goes to respond. To promise that if Alec gives him the chance he can swear he won’t but the music roars and the president of the companies’ voice rings out announcing Magnus and his band as they’re ushered onto the stage.

The performance feels good. It’s always a blast having Isabelle on stage with him and his band knows every beat. The audience is lively and excited, despite being roughly half filled with record executives. They all seem to be getting a little looser on the dance floor with every glass of champagne.

The entire time Magnus watches the kitchen door closely; every single chef pours out. Changed and ready to join the party or heading straight for the exit. Every single chef but Alec.

“We’ll close out with ‘It’s Always You’,” he says turning to his band who are switching up instruments for their next song. He usually tries to close out on something more upbeat, but tonight it has to be his slowest, most honest track.

“You sure, boss?” Bat asks pausing in pulling his guitar over his head. Magnus meets eyes with Isabelle who just smiles knowingly.

“Positive,” Magnus says turning back to the awaiting crowd. They perform a few more upbeat tracks, the kind that get people dancing and drinking. The kitchen door stays firmly closed so much so that Magnus starts to think Alec escaped out through a fire exit to avoid him.

He poses the concept to Isabelle during a quick change up between songs pulling her away from her mic for a second.

“He didn’t, he’s just hiding back there,” she leans over grabbing her phone off of the drum stand and shaking it. “I discreetly texted him during your solo bit on the last number and told him to get his ass out here.”

“And?”

Isabelle just shrugs. She’s clearly uncertain of what her brother may or may not do in this situation. Magnus wants him to hear the song. He knows Alec well enough to know he never listened to it, probably never even looked up the title of it, but he needs him to hear it. It’s not the only song he’s written about Alec, but it’s the only one he’s written that’s been polished and produced. He has notebooks full of one’s he’d written when they were together that maybe one day he can make into a whole album, but not unless he gets this right.

He’s wooed Alec all night with cheesy compliments, but there’s no way that’s enough. This song is his last-ditch effort at winning Alec back or at least winning the chance to explain himself to Alec. He needs him to hear it almost as much as he just plain needs Alec.

***

“Seelie Queen’s guy is here and refuses to sign over the boxes to anyone but you, said his boss insisted,” Underhill says coming in to let Alec know about his lack of success with Alec’s final gopher run request of the night as he hides out in the back hoping to wait out Magnus’ performance and possibly Magnus in general. He’s not really sure about the second one yet, especially after the compliments throughout dinner that definitely succeeded in charming him and after finally checking his phone to find Isabelle’s text a few songs ago basically threatening him with bodily harm if he didn’t stop hiding out in the kitchen.

Seelie Queen is the strangest woman Alec has ever met and he’s 100% certain that’s not her real name, but she makes the best cupcakes in the city and Alec has never been a master of desserts. So, there’s no one else in the city he’d hire to help him cater such an event and provide the pre-midnight dessert option. The fact she did it on such short notice is a miracle, luckily she quote on quote ‘doesn’t live by the mortal calendar of new years and passages of time,’ whatever that means.

“Dammit,” he says jumping down off the counter and patting his pockets. Somewhere over the course of the night he’s lost the ear plugs. Likely thrown into the trash by mistake with a wad of dinner tickets that had accumulated in his pockets. “Dammit,” he says again. “I’ll handle it.”

He gestures for Underhill to head back out into the party. The door opening and closing exposing him to the music for a bright second. He waits until the muffled music ends. A clear break in the songs to make his way out of the kitchen and cut through the crowd quickly and unnoticed.

Magnus has been sending him sweet compliments all night and it’s definitely softening him to the idea of hearing him out, but he’s still not ready to hear him sing again. Magnus’ voice is adored by millions, but by none more than Alec. He worries hearing one note will break any resolve he has left.

***

Magnus spots him as he takes a sip of water between songs. He’s certain at the pace he’s moving Alec didn’t want to be spotted, but Magnus sees him anyways, still attuned to looking for Alec in a crowded room. He spots the lack of bright green near his ears now, thanking whatever incident led to those ridiculous ear plugs being banished. The fact that Alec clearly waited until a break in between songs is still endlessly frustrating, but now when he comes back he’ll have to listen.

There are only two songs left on their set, a short track they can probably wrap up before Alec returns, at least Magnus hopes he’s returning and he hadn’t just witnessed his great escape.

If he times this right Alec will be forced to listen to the only song Magnus has really wanted him to hear all night. His hail Mary attempt at getting Alec to listen to him.

***

Seelie Queen’s guy takes forever confirming his identity and by the time he’s wheeling the many boxes of baked goods into the building he can hear the notes of music. Breaks over. There’s no avoiding hearing Magnus now.

Outside of the main room the music is even clearer. A line of servers waits for him ready to set out the cupcakes. He instructs them on what to do and begrudgingly opens the door holding it for them all to pass through with their trays of cupcakes.

The music has settled now just lone guitar strings.

“I’m gonna end on a slow note tonight, a rarity for me,” Magnus chuckles from the stage the audience laughing along with him. Alec keeps his eyes fixed on the door nodding his head at every server that passes through. “I dropped this song about seven months ago and I haven’t performed it live yet, mostly because I knew the person I most needed to hear it hadn’t. Maybe tonight he finally will.”

Alec looks up at that and finds Magnus already looking his way, the only one left on stage. Now not just looking in a passing glance like before Alec notices the stark tattoo that stands out where his shirt, most likely purposefully, exposes his collar bone and his breath betrays him and hitches just a bit.

There’s no double meaning in Magnus’ words or gestures. No façade. Those aren’t the words of Magnus Bane pop star, that’s not the voice he uses when meeting his fans and pleasing a crowd. It’s the soft voice he always used when he spoke to Alec, the soft voice that had sounded so exhausted and nearly cracked this morning when Alec had shot down his attempt to talk to him.

It's a voice meant for Alec. A voice that says, please hear me out.

The last server passes through the door and Alec lets it swing closed behind him. He doesn’t retreat to the kitchen he stays put and he finally decides to listen.

It’s probably the simplest song he’s ever heard Magnus sing in a professional setting. Sure, he’s heard him idly hum and sing dumb songs about doing the laundry while Alec fell in love with his voice and laughed at his quirkiness, but he’s never heard such a stripped-down track performed anywhere. It’s not that Magnus is dishonest in his music, but he’s guarded. He sings about the fun times, not the hard times. There are parts of him that aren’t for public consumption and he likes to keep it that way.

This song is the exact opposite of all that.

It’s a love song for all intents and purposes, but it’s tinged with regret and apologies. There’s mentions of hazel eyes, tattoos and arrow rings and a few dozen other little things that make it unbearably clear this song is about Alec, is about them. Casually, but with all the heart he can put into the lyrics Magnus calls Alec the love of his life without even saying his name.

Every line floors Alec a little more. In some ways he wishes he had listened to the song when it dropped, understands now why Isabelle had been so damned adamant that he had to hear it. But in other ways he’s glad he’s hearing it for the first time now, not online or on the radio but here and now live with Magnus looking right at him.

The notes fade and the light on Magnus dims. The audience erupts in quick cheers as Magnus thanks them bringing his band back out to receive their praise. The lights go back up to the party atmosphere a DJ in the far corner taking over likely until Magnus is expected to sing Auld Lang Syne at midnight and Alec finally drops his gaze from the stage.

He reaches up brushing a hand across his face to compose himself and feels a dampness under his eyes not knowing when the hell he started crying. He rubs at his eyes quickly. Grabbing a glass of champagne from a passing server and downing it before turning back to the door and into the hall needing a moment to breathe.

***

He doesn’t start talking until he sees Alec, ever the gentleman, holding open the door for all the servers to pass through with dessert trays. He never stops looking in Alec’s direction, relieved when Alec finally looks up at him. He sings every note, every line with everything he’s got hoping that Alec hears every word.

When the song ends he can’t be certain, but he thinks he sees a tear falling from Alec’s eye. He wants nothing more than to run to him instantly, but he has to give his thanks and bring out his band for their deserved praise as well. By the time he’s done that though he looks up and Alec’s gone again the door he’d been standing near still swinging open and closed like he’d rushed out abruptly. Magnus’ heart sinks.

“Go after him,” Isabelle says nudging his shoulder as they all step down from the back of the small stage. “You know how he likes to find his little pockets of quiet when he needs to think. He heard you, so, go after him.”

She smiles encouragingly nudging him again. He nods, smiling gratefully and turning away in search of Alec. He stops however, for a brief second turning back to Isabelle and pulling her into a tight hug.

“Thank you,” he says holding her tight.

“You can thank me by making my brother and yourself happy again,” she says with a laugh pushing Magnus back playfully and in the opposite direction. “Now, go.”

***

Alec sits on the softly lit stairs between the main room and the now closed down hotel bar twirling the ring on his pointer finger in thought.

He hadn’t expected to see Magnus tonight and he sure as hell hadn’t expected that song.

Mere minutes ago he’d been only warming up to the idea of maybe hearing Magnus out in the near future. Now, even though he still absolutely needs to hear an explanation from Magnus not in musical form, he’s halfway to forgiving him and a quarter of the way to walking back upstairs to that stage right now and kissing the beautiful, infuriating man senseless.

***

Magnus finds him in a stairwell. The fact doesn’t surprise him in the least. They met in a stairwell. Isabelle dragging her brother along to the first show she’d sung backup for him at a small venue he always loved to play in the city. Alec had clearly been a little overwhelmed by the crowded space at the after party and had slipped away. Magnus finding him nursing a half drank beer on the stairs near the back exit. It’s a lovely sort of déjà vu.

“I was worried you’d left,” Magnus says quietly as to not startle him.

Alec lets out a long breath as Magnus approaches moving to sit beside Alec near the bottom of the steps that lead into the hotel bar keeping a distant space between them on the step.

“I’d be lying if I said I hadn’t thought about it numerous times today,” Alec laughs a little embarrassed. Magnus can’t blame him for that, Magnus had somewhat ambushed him. He’s about to say just that, but Alec beats him to the draw. “But not after that, I couldn’t just leave after that.” He says finally turning his head to look at Magnus, the dim light from the bar and the lamps along the stairwell catching in his hazel eyes.

“I meant every word,” Magnus says with as much heart and truth as he can.

Alec nods still holding his eyes. “I know. I know the difference between stage Magnus and the Magnus I got to know, the Magnus who speaks a little softer and makes food puns that somehow turn out complimentary and sexual simultaneously. That was definitely the latter up there tonight.”

Magnus allows himself a small smile, comforted by the fact Alec still understands him so well.

“I want to hear you out,” Alec says a few moments of quiet later. “I do. These last few months have been,” he pauses looking away seemingly trying to pluck the proper word from thin air. “Hell.” He settles on eyes fixed in front of him now. “But we were good one day, nearly on our one-year anniversary and the next day you just left, Magnus.”

He did. And now he has the chance to fix this. To get this right.

“I know,” he starts bracing and turning towards Alec as best he can. Alec looks up clearly giving him his full attention, giving the floor to him. “And not a day has gone by since that I haven’t regretted it. Calling these last few months hell might be an understatement darling.”

He takes a deep breath, already feeling like he’s going to cry and really wanting to hold it together at least long enough to air it all out.

“I never wanted to leave you, but I guess I just always assumed one day you’d leave me.”

Alec’s eyes go wide, mouth open to speak.

“I know you wouldn’t,” Magnus says before Alec can speak. “Or at least I know that now. I don’t think I totally did back then and it wasn’t because I didn’t trust you. It was because I didn’t trust myself.” He says spilling every truth he can in this stairwell. “We worked so well together from the very start and every single day we just got better and somewhere along the line I let every fucked-up relationship I’d had in the past get in my head and tell me that sooner or later the other shoe was going to drop.”

Somewhere around month nine when planning the tour had gotten underway, he’d started getting into his own head that sooner or later, even if Alec felt different, things would implode. That the tour, the distance, the life he lived that had been fairly quiet while strictly in studio working on a new album the entirety of their relationship would rear its ugly head and ruin them just like it had ruined every other relationship he’d ever had. He says all that.

“And it’s a shitty excuse, I know that, to say that I thought we couldn’t survive it all just because nothing ever had in the past,” he says. “I was so scared of losing you that I left you which is incredibly stupid when you really think about. And I’ve thought about it, a lot.”

“You could’ve told me all that, Magnus,” Alec says hand lifting like he’s considering reaching out but then pulling back at the last minute. “I knew you’d had some bad exes and you never really wanted to talk about it and I respected that, but you could have told me. I can promise you I wasn’t going anywhere.”

And there it is. The thing Magnus realized not but an hour after he’d left Alec. Alec wasn’t going anywhere, he’d never said it out loud in those exact words, but it was the case. And there Magnus was running away just in case he was wrong.

“I realized that, but it was too late, I was already on tour and suddenly everything just hit me,” Magnus says brushing away a tear he definitely didn’t give permission to fall. “I realized I let the love of my life go because I got scared and I was a million miles away and I figured you hated me so I wrote a song.” He shrugs at the time it had seemed like the only way he could possibly get a message out to Alec.

He takes a deep breath turning his eyes back up to Alec’s.

“So, here I am nine months later, telling you face to face that I’m sorry, that I never should have let you go, that I should have talked to you and not just ran because I was scared of losing you. To hope by some miracle you’ll give me another chance at this, because I’m going to be in love with you forever, but also I understand if this is all just too little too late and you hate me too much to ever trust me again.”

Alec takes a deep breath letting it out so heavily that his bangs blow up. It makes Magnus smile a small smile.

“I was really, really angry at you,” he starts and it’s nothing Magnus hadn’t expected to hear. “But the thing is I couldn’t hate you. I should have, but I couldn’t. Which was infuriating because you broke my heart and I was still in love you. Still wanted you to be okay and got annoyed with Aline when she took her damning the day you were born best friend support too far.” He huffs out a small laugh and Magnus does the same.

“I was never going to leave you,” he says quiet eyes locked on Magnus’ like he’s trying to sear the words into his brain. “I knew what I was signing up for when I first asked you out. I knew it wouldn’t always be easy and sooner or later we’d be cities apart for months at a time, but I knew we could survive it. Or at least I thought I did until the day you told me otherwise.”

He reaches out tangling his fingers with Magnus’ and his breath hitches. Magnus could never forget what Alec’s skin felt like against his, but after nine months of being touch-starved completely of the intimacy he’d only ever found truly peacefully in Alec’s hands he feels like this is the first time they’ve ever collided.

“I won’t act like I didn’t shatter when you left, but I do forgive you,” he says rubbing his thumb across Magnus’ knuckles soothingly. “You’re the love of my life too. Obviously, there’s gonna be some very much needed conversations in our future and we’re gonna have to work on communicating when things scary, but I’d be a fool to not give us another chance.”

Magnus could cry and judging from the way Alec reaches out his free hand and delicately wipes his thumb under his eye he actually is.

“Yeah?” Magnus says completely terrified, but filled with hope.

“Yeah,” Alec smiles dropping his hand. “I’m not going anywhere, hell, Magnus I want to marry you one day.”

Magnus doesn’t say a word just scoots a little closer to Alec so their knees can brush. Doesn’t point out the present tense use of ‘want’ in Alec’s words as he tilts his forehead to Alec’s.

“I’m sorry,” he whispers into the space between.

“I know, you don’t have to keep saying it,” Alec says and Magnus shrugs. Maybe he doesn’t but he knows he’ll do it a few more times anyways. “I do trust you; I always did, it just got a little bumpy there for a while, but now that I know everything I know I can trust you again when you say it.”

“A little bumpy?” Magnus says incredulously pulling back from Alec.

Alec shrugs, “Okay, maybe a lot. The point is we’re here now and we’re gonna keep talking and we’re not gonna fall apart this time. Bumps averted, promise.”

“Promise,” Magnus says.

“I owe you an apology too,” Alec says and Magnus is about to shut that down, but Alec soldiers on. “Don’t say I don’t because I do, I was an ass tonight when you first showed up and way harsher than I needed to be when all you wanted was to talk. It wasn’t fair and I am sorry about that.”

“You’re forgiven,” Magnus says, meaning it.

“Look at us already communicating properly on both ends,” Alec smiles after a few beats and Magnus chuckles. Progress march on it seems.

He’s looking into Alec’s eyes now with a soft genuine smile and god he wants to kiss him. He’s about to do just that when an alarm blares in his pocket. Damn, his thirty minutes to midnight alert.

“I’m supposed to sing Auld Lang Syne after the balls drops,” he says pulling his phone from his pocket and silencing the alarm.

“Right,” Alec says pulling back. “It’s okay we’ve got time now.”

They do. Logically Magnus knows that, but that doesn’t change the fact that here and now he doesn’t want to leave Alec’s side. He wants to hold his hand and kiss him at midnight and tell him that he’s pretty damn keen on the idea of taking Alec home and doing so every night for the rest of their lives.

Alec jumps up from the step moving down to where the closed bar is clearly giving Magnus his out. Magnus stands, joining Alec putting them face to face with one another.

Alec raises an eyebrow in question at Magnus as he gets out his phone shooting a quick text off to Isabelle.

“Now we have even more time,” he smiles looking up at Alec as he pockets his phone.

“Magnus.”

He shrugs, “They’ll sort it out. I have full confidence in Isabelle’s ability to take my place and full confidence in myself knowing that I very much don’t want to be anywhere that’s not with you right now.”

He steps closer to Alec breaching most of the distance, but not touching. Leaving the next move completely up to Alec.

“So what now?” Alec asks as he steps a little closer to Magnus. His voice doesn’t sound desperate or pleading, but there’s an edge to it that screams ‘don’t break my heart this time.’ Even after all that’s just been laid out on the table he’s still a little scared it’ll be the same thing all over again. Magnus takes a deep breath and resolves to never, ever hurt or let this man’s heart go again.

#malec #malec fic #shadowhunters #magnus bane #alec lightwood #claia lukemaryse and heline coming your way soon :)#the first chapter got out of hand y'all #posting a little earlier than planned think of it as a christmas gift!#i'm not good at figuring out how to post/promote multi-chapters on here lol #shadowhunters fic

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