#this started off as an idea that woke me up at 6am

[theharddeck]

i know you want it, do-si-don’tcha (hangman x reader)

Pairing: hangman x reader (no y/n)

Synopsis: hangman and his girlfriend walk home in the rain after a night at a dance hall, and warm up back at the airbnb.

Warnings: 18+ minors DNI, unprotected sex, oral (f receiving), bit of a praise kink (it’s Jake; you’ve got to), daddy kink if you squint (it’s Jake, you’ve GOT to), overstimulation, swearing for sure, lmk if I need to add anything else

Length: 5.8k

Title is from this song by Tanner Adell, and images are edited from Pinterest

On paper they seemed nice—refreshing! The land needs it! At least it’s warm out!—but when you and Jake pushed open the barn doors at the Broken Spoke at just after midnight to sheets of pouring rain, you would have to dissent.

Walking to the dance hall had seemed like a good idea when you and Jake left the airbnb some five hours ago. It wasn’t far, and parking was going to be a mess, and you were both in boots anyways—Jake in the ones he’d gotten for graduating college, you in the ones he’d gotten you just before the trip.

Walking to the dance hall had seemed like a good idea when you and Jake left the airbnb some five hours ago. It wasn’t far, and parking was going to be a mess, and you were both in boots anyways—Jake in the ones he’d gotten for graduating college, you in the ones he’d gotten you just before the trip.

The light brown leather was soft and they fit too perfectly for them to be off the shelf, but the fact that they didn’t have to be broken in meant you didn’t push Jake too heavily for details. You were grateful for that now, as you stood in front of streaming rain, wondering if the gorgeous leather was going to survive the night.

“We could call an uber?” you suggested, having to shout to be heard over the downpour.

“In downtown Austin, at midnight?” Jake called back, and when you looked over at him, his eyes were sparkling with laughter. You could see him trying to hold it in, knowing your aversion to rain, but he looked like he wanted to burst out laughing.

“We’re walking back in this, aren’t we?” you sighed, and Jake pulled you into his side, letting out his laugh.

“Afraid so, sweetheart,” he said. He pressed a kiss to the top of your head, and your arm curled around his waist reflexively.

You held out your hand from under the awning and the rain hit it with such force that it actually splashed back onto you. It was a warm night, late summer in Texas still pushing 80 degrees even though the sun had gone down hours ago, and the rain felt slightly cooling.

It could be worse.

You’d left your phones back at the airbnb, and it was just water.

You tilted your head to look up at Jake. His eyes were slightly squinted at the splash of water, a sheen of sweat from line dancing still on his skin. His five o’clock shadow was always more pronounced on the second day, and so tonight you could just see the beginnings of stubble across his jaw.

He really was too handsome to be real, especially when he looked down at you, his green eyes intense as always. His head tilted a little, like he hadn’t expected you to be looking back at him, and you smiled reassuringly, squeezing his waist.

“Okay,” you said, blowing out a long breath. “Let’s do it.”

Jake tightened his arm around you, before his hand fell from your shoulder, across your back, to hold the hand closest to him.

“Let’s do it,” he repeated, and the two of you stepped out from under the awning.

You couldn’t stop the squeal when the rain washed over you, absolutely unrelenting. It was cooler than you’d expected, sharp and hard, and it shot new energy through your veins. Jake seemed to reacting similarly, jumping back and forth to acclimatize himself to the water as his clothes soaked through. Water streamed off the brim of his hat, down over the black button down he was wearing, plastering it to his body.

You knew you looked a fool, drenched like a wet dog in the rain, just staring at your boyfriend, but he looked like a music video from the early aughts. Broad shouldered, white teeth, flashing grin as the water splashed off of him. His dark jeans stretched over thick thighs that could make you salivate on any given day, but now had water running down them, denim tight like a second skin. Jake kicked at a puddle, boots sending up a spray of water and as he laughed at the cascade in the streetlight, you felt your heart swell.

His unbridled joy was a beautiful thing, especially for its rarity. When he was on duty, he bore responsibility heavily, masking it under overconfidence and driving jibes. But this Jake—the one who laughed when he was soaked to the bone, unbothered by rain in the middle of a parking lot in Texas—this one was special to get to see.

He turned back to you, and you smiled softly at him, lashes heavy from the rain.

Jake pulled the hand he still held to draw you to him; you fit easily under his arm as the two of you started walking. Your arm around his waist, his over your shoulder, and you skipped a step to matched your pace to his.

Left - right - left - right, steel-tipped toes through puddles of rainwater.

A moment later, you felt something warm on your forehead as Jake settled his hat on your head. It sat low on you, resting on your ears rather than your temples, but it stopped the rain from falling into your eyes, and when you looked up at Jake, he was running a hand through his hair to fix it. His hair was getting long, flipping over the crown of his head, and the ends curling up almost to his shoulders.

Jake’s eyes narrowed to protect them from the rain, and water ran unprotected down his face. Your heart flipped at the little gesture, unprovoked and unexpected, but entirely natural to Jake, to look after you like that.

Thoroughly soaked, you didn’t hurry as you walked back. You were both drenched, so there was no point in running, and the night was warm enough that you didn’t worry about the chill.

A couple cars slowed as they drove by, trying not to splash you both, and you were content to walk in silence. There wasn’t much to say, and your arms around each other seemed a pretty perfect cap on the evening.

One truck honked as it drove by and you felt Jake look at you before cursing quietly under his breath. A moment later, his arm fell from around you and he started unbuttoning his shirt; you looked down and understood why.

Your yellow sundress had been opaque in the evening light when you’d left the airbnb, but soaked through, it was nearly transparent. The skirt was the perfect twirling length, falling to just above your knees, and the thick straps were wide enough to hide your bra straps, but the rain pressed it against your skin, and the red of your bra was clearly visible, as well as the black line of your panties.

“Jake, it’s fine—” you started, when you noticed he was glaring after the truck, unbuttoning the wet fabric with less finesse than normal.

“Not a word,” he said, looking sharply at you.

You closed your mouth.

He pulled off the button down, peeling it off his shoulders and wrapping it around you like a cloak. It wasn’t so oversized that it swallowed you, but he hung it stubbornly over your shoulders, buttoning it deliberately. It was too wet to feed your arms through it, and so it ended up like a cloak or a straightjacket, but Jake’s expression harbored no room for discussion. His brow was furrowed in concentration, jaw tight, and when he finished, you went up on your toes to kiss him before he stepped away.

His lips were warm, rain water coasting down his cheeks, and you felt him relax slightly as your mouth brushed against his.

“Thank you,” you whispered against his lips, and he grunted. You raised your eyebrows, still extended on your toes, weaving slightly till his hands came up to steady you while you waited.

“Welcome,” he said, begrudgingly. You could tell he didn’t like the idea of other people being able to see you exposed like that, just as he knew you didn’t want him to go all territorial about it. Sometimes it was hot, sometimes it was something that rubbed you wrong, because he had to know he was all yours. You could be stark naked on the street, and the only eyes you’d care were on you would be his.

You smiled, kissing him again quickly, then settled back into your boots.

“Besides,” you said, starting to walk again and gesturing at his chest, “pretty sure this is a more graphic image than what I was rocking.”

Jake looked down at himself, at the white undershirt that was absolutely translucent against his tanned skin. You could see the texture of his chest hair, the darkness of his nipples, the contours of his abs, looking like he was an Amercrombie model. Jake shrugged, unphased by his body being on display, and reached down to where your fingers peeked out from the confines of his shirt to tangle your hands together.

You walked on together.

The shirt wrapped around you was still warm from his body, and the contrast stoked something inside of you. He’d been so patient all night, guiding you through the foreign dances, never minding when you stumbled over his boots. He’d twirled you in his strong arms, made you feel light and beautiful, and reminded you how good it was to be on his arm.

To be his.

You turned down the street of your airbnb, and Jake dug around in his pocket for the key. He never let go of your hand, and that light contact had your body humming for more.

Jake got the door open, flipping on a tabletop light and propped it open with his hip as he reaching back into the rain for you.

A shiver worked over your skin as the water flowed over his skin, the sharp lines of his jaw, shoulders, arms, and Jake’s eyes clouded with concern as he noticed the tremor, and he pulled you quickly into the house.

“Baby,” he said quietly, voice chastising and caring at once, “why didn’t you say you were cold?”

He closed the door behind you, his long fingers undoing the buttons of the shirt he’d put around your shoulders. Absently, you knew you should help him, but he didn’t seem to mind, so you stood in a dripping pile in the mudroom as he reached the end of the column, and pushed the garment off your shoulders. It fell with a splat to the tile, and your newly exposed skin prickled with awareness.

Jake made a sound in the back of his throat like concern, and his hands skimmed down your shoulders from where he’d pushed the button down off you, finding the zipper of your dress under your arm. He pressed a kiss to your shoulder as he undid the zipper slowly, and another shiver worked over your skin.

You could feel warmth radiating off of him, through the translucent white of his undershirt, through the stretched denim of his jeans. You leaned slightly towards him as the material of your dress slackened as the zipper came undone.

“Jake—” you started, but he shushed you as he guided the straps down your shoulders. The dress pooled on the floor around your boots, his motions slow and gentle, his touch warm.

Jake stilled at the sight, and you felt his gaze travel up your body, his hands coming to your waist.

“Ah, sweetheart,” he sighed, and his thumbs smoothed over the skin of your stomach as his perusal fluttered beneath your skin. You watched desire flash in his eyes, his jaw clench at the sight of you, but then determination to care for you chased it away.

You whispered his name again, as your hands drifted over the thin cotton of his shirt.

“I know, baby, I’m hurrying,” he said, misunderstanding. Jake leaned into your touch as your hands smoothed over his shirt to his shoulders, but he turned his head when you rose up to kiss him. Undeterred, you pressed your lips against his cheek, his jaw, trailing down to his neck.

You loved the way his stubble prickled under your tongue, rough texture where there was usually smooth, and the rain water tasted sweet on his skin.

“You’re shaking, angel,” he muttered, voice strained as your tongue skated along his jaw. “Come on, stop that, let me take care of you.”

You shivered again, biting back a whimper as your mind ran through the many ways in which he could take care of you. Jake read your shiver as emphasis that he needed to work faster, and his hands tightened on your waist, holding you steady as he pushed away from you. You could see his eyes dilated from desire, but he still knelt in front of you, lifting one of your feet to pull off the boot. Your hands rested on his shoulder, fisting the thin cotton there as you leaned back against the door for balance.

His skin was warm like a furnace, and you wanted to curl up into his chest, warm your body with his.

“Jake, please—” you tried again, and the look he shot up at you as he pulled off your boot was frustrated.

“I know, sweetheart, let me just get these off of you, then I’ll get a blanket—“

“Jake,” you interrupted, “it’s not the cold.”

He stopped at your words, eyes flitting up to yours in confusion, before falling over your body. The goosebumps over your skin, the slight shivers, the uneven breathing—you watched it dawn on him that this was your reaction to him, not the rain.

He sat back on his thighs, looking up at you. His eyes were dark, his jaw loose, and he finished pulling off your other boot.

“Why didn’t you say something sooner, baby?” he asked, the slightest reprimand in his voice. His hands trailed up your legs as he leaned forward, not breaking eye contact, to press a kiss against your stomach, “You know I would’ve been on my knees way sooner for you.”

You whimpered, you couldn’t help it, and you saw his eyes darken.

“Tried to tell you,” you whispered, as his hands skimmed over your skin. His touch felt like sparks as he reached your underwear, fingers teasing along the edge of it.

“My pretty, needy girl,” he murmured, his fingers dipping under the hem as he started to pull them down your thighs. “Am I gonna find you wet under here, sweetheart?”

You squirmed as the material dragged across your skin, and then Jake exhaled slowly as you were bared to him.

“Angel,” he groaned, looking up at you, and before you could ask what, he ran a finger through your folds. Your body jerked at the contact, hand fisting his tshirt and your eyes falling closed. Jake pulled his hand away and you heard him hum as he brought his finger to his mouth, tasting you.

“What was it that got you this ready, baby?” he asked, voice low, as he returned his hand. He ran his finger through you, feeling, teasing, pulling through the wetness there and reveling in it. “Was it the dancing? Knowing every man in that hall was jealous of whose arm you were on? Was it those assholes in the truck, getting a glimpse of my girl—“

“You, Jake,” you interrupted, your hips chasing after his hand, knowing it was what he wanted to hear, knowing it was true. It wasn’t dancing, it was being in his arms; it wasn’t being exposed, it was him covering you. “Only you, baby.”

“Damn straight,” Jake muttered darkly, and his hand dropped as he leaned forward to bury his face in your cunt.

Your head hit the door as your back arched when his tongue speared into you. Jake’s hands gripped the back of your thighs, spreading you, and his mouth worked over you. Normally he’d tease you with kisses, brush his lips around your inner thighs and wait until you begged before he met your desperate need, but tonight you felt the urgency in his mouth, the possession.

He licked you hungrily, tongue flat and broad, before he worked his way up to your clit. When he stroked over the tight bundle of nerves you felt your legs weaken, leaning back against the door heavily, and Jake hummed against you. The vibration felt heavenly, but it was him, it was knowing he knew how good he was making you feel, that sent another rush of arousal through you.

“Fuck, sweetheart,” Jake mumbled against you as he lapped at you.

“Feels so good, baby,” you told him, and you let go of his shirt to reach up for his head. You brushed your hand over his forehead into his hair; his eyes fluttered as your nails scratched into his scalp and tangled your fingers into his hair.

Jake let go of one of your thighs to reach between your legs, his hand stroking between your folds as his mouth returned to your clit. His lips closed over you, his tongue circling, tasting, and he pressed a finger at your entrance.

His broad, calloused finger felt so damn good, pushing steadily and your hips canted forward.

“Shit, baby,” Jake whispered. “Look at you, pulling me in like this.”

You felt shameless, your body wanting more and more and more of him, and when you looked down to see your arousal glistening on his chin as he watched you, tightness coiled in your core.

“Jake, you look so good,” you had to tell him, your voice wrecked, and his eyes shot up to you. His eyes were blown wide and his chest puffed slightly at your words and he added another finger.

You moaned at the delicious stretch, at the look of wild pride on his face.

“You like how I look like this?” Jake asked, increasing the speed of his fingers, feeling your legs shaking. “You like how your man looks on his knees, how fucking gone he is for you, for your taste, for those little whimpers you’re making?”

His words curled over you and you nodded frantically, lost in sensation. Jake curled his fingers inside of you, knowing where you ached, and when his mouth returned to your clit, you gasped, pulling at his shirt. If he kept this up, you were going to come, and you didn’t want it to end yet.

He chuckled darkly but followed your pulling, rising up to stand in front of you. Taller than you again, and still in his boots, one of his hands rested on the door beside your head and the one that had been between your legs traced over your lips. You opened your mouth obediently, and Jake groaned when your tongue licked over his fingers, tasting how good he’d made you feel.

“Right back at you, darlin’,” he said. “I can’t think straight, not with you looking like this.”

He pulled his finger from your mouth, caging you back against the door, and he dipped his head to kiss along your jaw, down your neck. He found a spot that made you whine and when he sucked, your hips bucked forward; you both moaned when your heat met his thigh.

You ground against him, knowing you were making a mess, but the drag of wet denim against your core was nothing short of intoxicating. The rough friction, with the soft pull of Jake’s mouth at your neck, had you whimpering, and Jake’s hands dropped from the door to undo your bra. You vaguely registered it dropping to the floor, and the cool air on your skin before Jake’s big hands covered your breasts. His palms were warm, his fingers rough, and he squeezed as you rutted against him.

“Yeah, baby?” Jake pulled back slightly to ask, his panting breath on your neck. “You gonna get yourself off on my thigh?”

Shit, you probably could.

Just the thought of it sent another wave of arousal through you, and Jake groaned quietly as he felt the slide of you grow slicker against his jeans. He pushed his hips back into you slightly, and your hands scrambled to pull at his tshirt. You needed his skin, to feel him against you, and Jake released you so you could pull the thin cotton off of him.

His skin glowed golden in the dim light, tan and warm and your hands pushed over his chest, reveling in the feel of him. You could feel his breath stutter at your touch, and your hands turned downward.

“Baby,” Jake warned, as your fingers brushed through the hair below his navel.

“Baby,” you teased back, and then your breath caught when you felt him through his jeans. Jake’s hips bucked forward as you pressed your hand over his length. You could feel him, hard and hot, and you ground into his thigh, knowing how good he would stretch you, fill you.

Jake groaned, his forehead dropping to your shoulder and his hands bracing on either side of the door as you worked over him.

“Tell me quick, darlin’,” he said through a clenched jaw. “You feel too good and you’re not even fucking touching me yet; if you want to come on something other than my cock, tell me now.”

You whimpered, his frank words only spurring you on. You reached up to undo his belt buckle, then got the zipper just low enough that you could slide your hand inside his boxers to feel him. You both moaned when your hand closed around him, hard and pulsing, the tip already leaking precum.

“That last,” you managed to say, “I want that, Jake, please—“

“Thank fuck,” Jake gritted, and he reached down to pull your hands from him, lifting them above your head. With one hand, he held your wrists against the door and with the other, he hastily jerked down his pants. Still soaked from the rain, they only made it halfway down his thighs, and Jake abandoned them to get back to touching you, running his fingers between your thighs again.

“You’re so wet,” he murmured, and his brow furrowed slightly as he looked back up to check in with you. “Are you sure you’re ready for me, baby? We could—“

“I’m ready, please,” you breathed, your body canting away from the door. Normally you’d work up to taking his dick but tonight you wanted him now, bad enough to risk the immediate discomfort.

“Baby…” Jake started, but trailed off with a chuckle when he saw your determined glare. “Alright, alright.”

His hand drifted from between your legs to pump over his cock, working your wetness and his precum together, and you whimpered as he lined himself up to your entrance.

“Please, baby, please—“ you pleaded, and Jake slammed into you.

Fucking hell.

You knew he was big, you were reminded every time, but your body slacked against the door as he pushed himself into you. You wanted to push back, press your hips into him, but you were burning with the stretch and all your body could do was work to accommodate him.

“Sweetheart,” Jake soothed, letting go of your wrist to brush a hand across your forehead.

You squirmed, try to find an angle to alleviate the stretch and Jake choked when you worked farther onto him.

“Darlin’, you’re so tight, stretching so good for me…”

You felt drunk, you felt like you were floating above yourself, the only thing tethering you to this plane was the ache between your thighs and Jake’s voice. Your head rolled and Jake knocked the hat off your head, so his hand could rest between your and the door, cradling you.

“Talk to me, baby,” he said, and you opened your eyes to see his face so close to yours, watching you closely.

“You’re trying so hard not to say that you told me so,” you tried to laugh, but your voice was tight between pain and pleasure.

“I’m being pretty heroic right now, I think,” Jake chuckled, but you saw the tightness in his shoulders as he fought to keep still.

God, he was so good to you, checking in and holding himself off to make sure you were okay. It was a tight stretch, and it was uncomfortable in the moment, but his care was so sweet and you knew it’d be just that—a moment.

“I’d be mad if it wasn’t so damn good,” you whispered, and Jake’s hips jerked forward at your mild praise before he reigned himself in.

“Baby—” he warned, but you pulled your wrists from his hand to trace down his sides, feel his measured breath as he fought to keep from pushing into you harder.

“Thought you wanted to fuck me, Jake,” you pouted, and Jake groaned as his resolve crumbled.

“Alright, baby, hang on,” he gritted, and for anyone else it would’ve been the cheesiest line, but with Jake it was a warning.

He pulled out slow, the stretch heavy both ways, then pushed back into you, hard. The hand he had behind your head, protecting you from the door, held you in place as he shoved his cock up into you, and you cried out.

You felt so full, and then he pulled back only to push in deeper. He set a punishing rhythm, and your hands grappled for purchase, feeling his back flex under your fingers as he thrust up into you. Each stroke drove you against the wood door and you felt your skin dragging against the raw surface but it grounded you, something other than the pulsing fullness inside of you.

Jake lifted one of your legs to wrap around his waist and you moaned as it changed the angle. He pushed impossibly deeper into you, using your thigh for leverage, and ground against your clit at the top of his thrust. Jake’s breathing had gone uneven, and knowing he felt it too had you clenching tighter around him.

It was too much, it was everything, it was so fucking good you couldn’t handle it.

“Breathe, baby,” Jake gritted. “You feel so fucking good; stay with me.”

“Jake,” you sobbed, not even knowing what you were asking for. His hips stuttered when you said his name, and he drove into you harder.

The force of his thrusts lifted you off the ground, your leg on his waist hanging in the air and your tiptoe only barely grazing the ground when Jake pulled out. He was fully supporting you, fucking you into the door and each scrape of your back against the wood felt like the only countermeasure to the immense pleasure he was wringing out of your body

“So pretty, baby,” Jake groaned, and when you opened your eyes, his were dark, mouth open as he looked down over you. His panting breath was warm on your skin, and he shifted again, pushing you higher against the door so he could lower his mouth to your breasts as he pumped into you.

You let go of him to clamp a hand over your mouth to cover the scream that wanted to escape.

“None of that, baby,” Jake said immediately, pulling back from your chest. “I want to hear every sound you make, every noise my girl makes on my cock; that’s mine.”

You whimpered but nodded, dropping your hand, and Jake went back to your breasts. His tongue laved over you, teasing and sucking, and you felt the tightening in your core spread to your spine.

Jake released you from his mouth again, his head falling between your breasts. “I can feel that cunt tightening around me; are you getting close, darlin’?”

“I’m so close, Jake,” you cried. He thrust harder, grinding at the top to press against your clit, and you moaned loudly. He was so good, so strong and so big inside of you and you were swimming in it, so close…

“Fuck, baby, you sound so pretty,” Jake groaned. “My baby sounds so good working herself on my cock, doesn’t she?”

You nodded frantically, you were his, his, and he felt so damn good. You were so close, and Jake knew, he always knew.

His hand fell from the door to pull you tight down onto him, pushed with his dick deep inside you, not even a breath of space between your bodies. Jake used that closeness to grind against you, not pulling out, his pelvis over your clit, the pressure unbearable.

“Give it to me, baby,” he said, his voice as tight as his body, wound, waited for you. “Need to feel you come, baby, need to feel that cunt flutter around me, so come on, baby, come for your da—“

You shattered before he could finish saying it.

You keened, your body pushing off the door and spasming as waves of pleasure pulsed through you. You felt it in your fingers, you felt undone and baptized, white hot and unreal, and it sent you tumbling. Your throat felt raw and didn’t realize you were crying until you felt Jake’s careful hands, gently wiping under your eyes.

“You did so good, baby,” he whispered, and you realized your body was trembling at the force of what he’d just pulled out of you.

“Baby, you’re shaking,” Jake said, concern and pride mixing in his voice.

“‘s your fault,” you mumbled, tucking your head into his neck.

God, he smelled good, like sweat and rain, and the stubborn remnants of his cologne from hours ago. Your eyes felt heavy, your body even more so, and as you relaxed against him, you realized he was still hard inside of you.

You pulled back to look at him, his corded muscles pressing you into the wall. His jaw was clenched and he was breathing carefully through his nose, his nostrils flaring, but his hand on your cheek was gentle, controlled.

Damn, you loved this man.

Only he would take you dancing, laugh in the rain with you, fuck you up against a door without making it out of his boots, and yet tenderly wipe your tears before he finished.

“Baby,” you said softly, lifting a hand to run your fingers through his hair again. Jake leaned into your touch, his eyes closing for a moment when you scratched at his scalp, and he hummed.

“Anything,” he whispered. “Tell me what you need, angel, anything.”

“I feel empty, baby,” you told him, “need to feel you come.”

Jake huffed out a breath, and you slid a little down the door as he twitched inside you.

“Sweetheart, you’re gonna kill me,” he groaned. “I’m trying to make sure you’re okay, not—”

“I’m okay,” you assured him, leaning down to kiss him. When your lips met his, he drew in a deep breath, surging up to meet you, and you rolled your hips experimentally.

It was the most you’d been able to move yet, your body loosened by your orgasm, and the sensation had both of you freezing.

“Shit, baby,” Jake breathed.

“I know,” you whispered back. He was so deep inside you, it felt like you could feel him in your throat, but when you ground down on him, it was an entirely new sensation. You were too sensitive still, you weren’t going to come again, but it felt fucking incredible, and if Jake’s labored breathing was any indication, he felt the same.

“Sweetheart—“ Jake gritted, and you moved again. You pressed your forehead to his, sharing air as you swiveled your hips over his, fucking down onto him slowly.

Jake moaned against your mouth, a low, broken sound, and you wished you could trap it in a locket, the sound of your man, absolutely wrecked for you.

“Want to feel you, baby,” you whispered, lifting slightly to kiss his jaw, his neck, back to his lips.

“Christ—” Jake’s control snapped and his hands gripped your hips so tightly you knew he’d bruise.

He moved you over his cock, pistoning into you, and you drove your hips down meeting him. You felt his rhythm increase, and you knew he was close; your hand in his hair tightened, pulling slightly, and he groaned, his head dropping to your shoulder as he pumped into you.

“You’re taking me so good, sweetheart,” he panted, and as his words curled through you, you clenched on him again. “Such a good girl for me, aren’t you?”

Jake’s hips stuttered when you tightened and he reached down to circle his thumb over your clit. Your hips jerked when he touched you, and you moaned.

“Baby, it’s okay, it’s too sensitive, I don’t need to—“

“Who knows what you need?” Jake’s words were as forceful as his hips, driving into you. You whimpered as his fingers brushed over you, pleasure spiraling from your core, your body winding up again.

The sounds of Jake slapping into you echoed around the mudroom, punctuated by your breathless moans and his hoarse grunts. Your body hadn’t fully come down from your first high, and you found yourself gasping as he drove into you, pushing you back to that brink again.

“Asked you a question, baby,” Jake said. He leaned forward, pinning your hips to the door. You couldn’t move, couldn’t shift against him, could only open your hips wider as he moved over you, inside of you.

“You do,” you whined, legs beginning to shake again. At your words, Jake circled your clit again, his thrusts growing

“That’s right,” Jake said, almost growled. “And what my girl needs is to come with me, yeah? To milk my cock so she doesn’t feel so empty anymore.”

“Please, Jake,” you begged, as your body wound tighter. He’d driven you so high so quickly that you knew the crash could be violent, and when Jake pressed a gentle kiss to the underside of your jaw, you were off like a Roman candle.

Jake was muttering rough praise against you, but you couldn’t hear him past the ringing in your ears, the way your world blurred, and then finally, finally, the twitching of his cock as he emptied inside of you. Jake came with a shout, slumping against you and the door, his body sagging as he pumped into you. As your skin cooled, you shivered again, this time actually from the cold.

Jake felt it, because of course he did.

You thought he’d pull out of you, but instead he leaned down and lifted your other leg around his waist. You protested feebly, but he silenced you with his lips, lifting you into his arms as he carried you towards the bathroom.

What a picture you made in the mirror’s reflection.

Your hair, tangled and wild, your body absolutely bare except for the marks left on your skin by your lover. Jake was still partially clothed, his jeans now around his knees as he shuffled you into the room, his golden skin shining with sweat. He set you down on the vanity, and he reached around you to turn on the tap to warm up a washcloth.

You smiled at him, sleepy and happy, and he grinned back, quick and easy. You saw his dimple appear on his cheek, and your heart felt like it was absolutely sopping with contentment, and you thought that maybe there was something redemptive about summer rain after all.

[specterllaw]

Mommy or Ma'am? - Mike Ross x Reader / Older Brother Harvey

Summary: After a hospital scare, Mike is put on babysitting duty, which quickly turns into a fun morning for you both

Warnings: SMUT, Switch! reader Switch! Mike

Harvey knew getting Jessica to hire you was a bad idea, he thought he could fully trust you though. You were twenty two it was your first real job, even it was just making copies for everybody in the office when needed.

I was going smoothly for awhile until Monday Morning rolled around, Y/n was on edge because not only did she have tests coming up but she also had sports, work, and helping her older brother Harvey keep his penthouse and office clean and neat. She felt like she was losing it, so whenever she was woken up at 6AM to go to the office she wanted to start crying, she hadn't even been to bed really, only falling asleep twenty minutes before Harvey even woke her up.

You were stuck in the copier room, taking stacks of papers from different associates, and partners and just coping them over and over again. It was working smoothly until you dozed off coping papers and mixed up the order of them, now realizing you messed up very important documents your breathing started to shallow. You heart rate was speeding up and you started to feel dizzy and hot, holding onto the table next to the copier tightly you heard somebody's rushed footsteps approach you all before your eye sight went black. "Woah woah woah" Mike said taking in your unusual state holding you up quickly as your body went limp "Louis! Rachel!" He yelled trying to shake you lightly "C'mon Y/n, wake up" He whispered nervously, not knowing what was going on with you, as he saw Louis walking up to the door he took a breath of relief "Stay here with her, I'm gonna call an ambulance and go get Harvey" Mike said urgently, gently laying you on the ground, using his suit jacket as a cushion under your head, waiting until Louis knelt next to you to try and wake you before rushing through the firm "Donna! call 911! now" He said checking Harvey's office only to see it empty "Mike! Calm down what's going on?" Donna asked worried standing up and resting a hand on his chest "I walked in to get copies from y/n and as soon as I walked in, she fell to the ground- where's Harvey?" He asked quickly before rushing to Jessica's office seeing Harvey sitting in front of her desk. "What do you need, Ross? We're having a very important-" Mike cut Jessica off quickly, and rudely. "Y/n passed out, I don't what happened" He whispered, Harvey looked at Jessica and then Mike "Damnit" he huffed standing up quickly rushing to the copier room right as paramedics were coming up from the elevator and rushing to the same room as him.

Whenever you woke up seeing your room empty made your heart hurt, not even Mike showed up to check on you? What even happened? Right before you could decide on what happened you hear the door latch and in rushes Mike and Harvey fighting on who gets in the room first. "Y/n" Harvey sighed sitting on the side on your bed "Don't ever do whatever you did again" He demanded, thinking he was talking about you messing up the copies and files you started to tear up "I-I'm sorry" You whimpered, terrified you might get fired for all of this "For what? I mean..Whenever you feel worked up..come find me..I understand more than you know, y/n/n" he whispered running a hand over your hair to smooth it out "I get panic attacks too...instead of...blacking out..I puke"He whispered, you studied his face, that explained all the mornings before his trials he'd get sick. "Same goes for you then..come find me" You whispered to him grabbing his hand squeezing it "So what happened?" You added on tilting your head "Exhaustion, y/n" Harvey said sternly "Which means, you're taking the next two days off, to rest, recharge" He said turning his head as Mike coughed awkwardly. "Okay kid, I'll let you speak, but I swear if you try anything with my sister I will kill you" Harvey stated seriously and confidently "Okay okay" Mike grumbled raising his hands up in the air before taking Harvey's seat, Harvey taking a step out into the hallway to call Jessica.

"Mr. Ross" You mumbled, you still felt a little sleepy from whatever they gave you but you were desperate to wake up "Ms. Specter" He quipped back running his hands down his pants legs. "You okay, Mike?" You asked softly sitting up to rest a hand on his shoulder "Y/n..I like you" He whispered "More than a friend, more than a co-worker, and I wanna like you as my girlfriend..but I don't want your brother to kill you" Mike added on resting a hand on yours "How long have you felt like this Mike?" You whispered using your other hand to cup his cheek "Weeks.....You're just..so kind and sassy, and the way you give Harvey shit is just...the proud look you have on your face after you make him speechless is adorable" He rambled "I would have you make copies of random words I had typed up just to see you..that's what I was on my way to do whenever I came into the copier room and found you leaning on the table about to fall.." Mike rambled even farther before you giggled and kissed him deeply

"Can you not shut the hell up Mike?" You mumbled against his lips as he resting a hand on yours, jumping away whenever he heard the door open "Excuse me!" Harvey yelled looking at you both "Care to explain yourselves, children?" He asked crossing his arms like a mother.

You were surprised to see Harvey agree to let Mike stay over, he claimed it was just to 'help you sleep, like you claimed' but you felt like he preferred you not to be home. As you walked into your room you smiled as Mike who was already ready for bed, striped to nothing but his boxers, truth was you and Mike had slept together, a couple of times, you both had agreed it was strictly friends with benefits until just yesterday at the hospital. "Ready for me to help you sleep?" Mike quoted playfully "Yes sir" You giggled climbing onto the bed, straddling Mike's lap as you looked down at him "Ah ah, Princess needs to rest, let me do all the work, baby" he whispered before using his hips and body force to flip you two over to where he was hovering over you.

"Look. At. Me" Mike demanded, you were on your third orgasm now, Harvey was long gone at work now and Mike was spending the day inside of with you, specifically taking turns making each other cum, but now Mike had taken it into his own hands to make you forget your own name, and you were 10000% okay with that. You felt Mike's hand grab your chin forcefully having you look up "I said look at me." He growled as he kept grinding his hips, his dick still buried six and a half inches deep inside of you, you moaned loudly leaning your head further back into the pillows, biting your lip as you made eye contact with Mike, whining and moaning loudly again. You couldn't help it, between his shiny lips from going down on you, to the messy ass hair from you pulling on it, or making the sex drunk look with the lazy smirk as his face as he fucked you into oblivion. "F-Fuck Mike!" You whimpered as he spit forcefully down where his cock entered inside of you before rubbing your clit with two fingers. You couldn't take it, you wanted to scream but you knew your brother would get a noise complaint and he'd know what you two were doing, home alone.

"My slut can take it" Mike whispered in your ear as he wrapped a hand around your throat, squeezing tightly as he started to thrust his hips alot faster than he previously was "Fuck fuck fuck Mike!" You screamed trying to close your legs but Mike just held them back open, continuing the sweet abuse on your clit, you could feel yourself getting close to the breaking point of cumming again and you knew Mike didn't care. You gasped loudly arching your back as he started fucking you alot faster, the hand around your throat tightening and it just added to your pleasure. "Cum, slut" Mike growled, not letting his hips falter its pace as he watched you cum, the way your face scrunched up, or the way your pussy squeezed around his cock as tight as possible, or maybe it was the fact you were screaming his name while leaving scratch marks all down his back but whatever it was, he wanted to remember it forever. You started to whimper, his cock moving inside of you beginning to become way too much for you to handle "Hold on baby..Use your words, you know what to say to stop, Daddy's so close though" Mike panted as he kept fucking you, his little whimpers were enough to get you wet yet again, but this time it sparked an idea. Once Mike started to pull out you glared at him, giving him a look that says 'you'll regret that' "Keep fucking me, baby" You whispered grabbing his boxer waist band that was tugged down below his cock, using it to pull him back closer, and his cock back deeper inside of you "Keep fucking mommy" You moaned arching your back, Mike whined before rolling onto his back pulling you ontop of him "Fuck keep talking please, you're so fucking hot" He moaned grinding his hips up "So Mike Ross is also a bottom?" You gasped playfully before holding his hips down "In that case, hips down, slut" You demanded before starting to grind and bounce your hips slowly on his lap, moving his cock in and out of you at a slow pace, making Mike try and sit up quickly, once he realized that wasn't happening he attempted to try and speed up your pace by thrusting his hips up but you just grabbed his hair and tugged it back, using the opportunity to leave hickeys down his neck. "F-Fuck Ma'am" Mike whined sitting up holding you close to him before taking one of your nipples in his mouth, swiping his tongue over it along with gently nipping at it, all making you increase the speed you were going. Mike was a whining wiggling mess, desperate to fuck you again and get his pleasure, he hadn't been a bottom since high school when he fucked the popular girl so this was extremely extremely hot for him.

"You wanna fuck me, baby?" You whispered in his ear dragging your nails down his back "Yes. yes yes yes Mommy, ma'am, yes, whatever you want me to call you just please let me fuck you, I wanna make you cum again" He whined trying to move his hips up against you as you lifted your hips up so it was just the tip inside of you. "Then take whats yours, Mike.." You whispered before kissing him deeply, he flipped you again, fucking you alot more erratic and harder, slamming into your pussy like it was the last time he'd ever fuck anybody. "Fuck!" You both shouted, yours more of a moan while Mike's was a full whine. You gasped feeling him cum inside of you, something you weren't expecting considering he had a condom, you couldn't think too much about it as you felt that familiar knot in your stomach snap as you came for the fifth or sixth time that morning.

As Mike pulled out you watched him stare down in horror and shock "Y/n..The condom broke.." He mumbled looking towards you as you were laying down trying to catch your breath.

[elcpsstuff]

The Summer I Remembered You (C.F) (Part 5)

A/N: I have so many ideas so i’ve been getting these chapters out like clockwork !!

—

Once Belly got home, she ripped the boys a new one which was hilarious. Conrad just stood there and took the beatings while Jeremiah tried to reason.

Now, it was 1am and I couldn’t sleep. I could sleep if I really tried. My brain was swirling. I needed a drink. I rushed downstairs but didn’t make any noise. Unfortunately, I wasn’t alone.

I went to go turn around, in hopes the shadow hadn’t seen me.

“You can stay.”

wow, thanks for allowing me to.

I spin on my heel to face their silhouette. “I didn’t mean to bother you..”

“It’s basically your house too, yn.” He doesn’t say this with sincerity or kindness, he says it cold. Like It was obvious. Fuck him. Honestly.

I place my hands on the island and sigh, “Why are you such an ass?”

He takes a swing at his beer bottle and then groans, “First Belly, and now you too? Fuck off.”

I felt my heart drop, not just to my stomach, but out my body. So far out I didn’t even want to look at him.

The boy that had been my best friend since I was ten, the first person I ever let see me cry, the boy who taught me how to dance when no one else would. Just looked me in the eye and said that. I felt like fucking throwing up.

“No wonder Aubrey broke up with you.” I said. He looked at me confused and I knew I had gotten him there. Me and Conrad didn’t talk for most of this year, and if we would’ve, then I would know about Aubrey.

I was listening to Steven on the phone a couple of months ago when I found out he had a girlfriend. Then I found out he broke up with her a couple of weeks ago.

He laughed a little, “Grow up, yn.”

“I hate you.”

I saw his face drop for a split second but then return to the cold face he had worn since I had gotten here.

“Okay, that’s great.”

I shook my head and stomped my way upstairs. I didn’t even want to be in the same house with him anymore.

—

Last Summer, Age 15 (Almost 16)

“yn?” I heard him call my name, but I just groaned. He closed my door and then sat next to me on the bed, keeping the lights off.

“Go away, Con.”

He giggled and brushed some hair out of my face. “Please, I wanna go to the beach.”

That’s when I opened my eyes. “Conrad, it’s like 3 in the morning.”

“But it might rain out, I’ve always wanted to see the beach while it’s raining.”

He was right, it never rained in cousins.

Don’t give in.

“Con—”

“Please?” He leaned in close to me and wrapped his arms around my waist.

I felt my cheeks burn, for reasons I couldn’t decide. Not right now.

“Fine. Only because you won’t stop till I do.” No, I did it because he was my best-friend. Maybe even more.

He was still in his suit from the night before, we had all gone to a dinner and came home at 1am. Which was only two hours ago. His hair was ruffled and he looked really cute.

Once we got to the beach it was actually really cold. I was only wearing a shirt and plaid shorts because I thought it would be hot, but I was wrong. Just as we got there, I felt rain drops hit me.

That’s when I felt Conrad lace his fingers in between mine and before I knew it we were kicking each other in the sand. The rain started pouring and I couldn’t see much but I could see him. Always.

For some reason I thought of Belly, and then felt extremely guilty but pushed the thought out of my mind.

The rain stopped within minutes and then it became extremely humid. Soaked, we laid down on the beach, the sand sticking to both of us.

We were close. Really close. Not just like best friend close.

“Thanks for coming with me.” He whispered. I could tell he was embarrassed because he wouldn’t look at me.

“Of course.” I smile, “But you owe me.”

He smirks and I didn’t even realize he was still holding my hand. I didn’t pull away though.

When I woke up the sun was just starting to rise, and neither of us had brought our phones. I was guessing it was around 6am.

When we walked back to the house, it was silent. Not a bad silent though, like a really good one. A smile kept creeping up on my face as I caught Conrad look at me a couple of times. I even let a laugh slip.

“What?” He says through a smile.

“Nothing.” I begin, “This was just crazy..”

Our hands brushed against each other and before I knew it we were interlocked again. The summer house was silent and Conrad shushed me playfully as we walked in, trying not to wake anyone.

“Where have you two been?” A voice says and I immediately pull my hand away from Conrad. We were both smiling and It was hard to hide it.

“Uh, early morning walk on the beach I guess..” I lie.

“mhmm..” Susannah says through a smirk and Conrad’s cheeks go red.

I look at him and my heart is pounding, “I’m gonna.. go upstairs or something.”

“Yeah, you should do that or something.” He says while smirking.

I quickly rushed away and once I got to my room I slammed the door shut. I fell on my bed and texted Frankie that she needed to call me asap.

This felt different. At this moment I didn’t know If i wanted him like a best friend. Had I ever?

—

Present day:

Nothing could top my raging headache. I would bet a thousand times it was because of Conrad. If he had just left me alone, none of this would have happened.

But Conrad never left me alone, even if he tried.

I tossed on a pair of spandex and a cousins shirt, making my way down the stairs, I didn’t bother to bring my phone.

I needed to be at the beach, it calmed me.

As I walked down the steps to our private stretch, I saw the one and only, sitting in the sand. I thought about walking away but he didn’t own the beach, so I kept moving.

He noticed me but then quickly turned away, and I think he was embarrassed. I suppressed my smile and then sat down next to him.

“When did you get out here?” I ask.

“10 minutes ago.”

“Oh.” I say quickly.

We sat there in silence for a couple of minutes before he cleared his throat.

“I’m sorry.” He mumbled, his head half buried in his arms. He said it like a little kid who got caught stealing candy.

“For what?” I say, acting oblivious.

“Last night. I didn’t mean it.” He stammered the words so quick almost like he didn’t want me to hear it, of course, I heard.

He pulled his head out of his arms and grabbed a joint and began to light it. I decided to ignore this action.

“I’m sorry too.” I whisper.

I saw his eyes widen for a second but then return back to normal, then he put his joint away and gulped.

“Don’t be.”

“I don’t hate you.”

“I don’t want you too.”

For some strange reason I started laughing.

“What, what’s so funny?” He says.

“This is all so crazy.” I say, out of breathe. It was, everything was so crazy when it came to me and Conrad.

Conrad didn’t say anything because I knew he was thinking the same thing. About that night. Times like these I thought we would be okay, and that we could work everything out, but then I remembered everything, and Belly. I can’t do that to her.

—

Conrad went to go and grab some muffins, and eventually I went back to the house. Jeremiah was downstairs alongside Steven, Belly, Laurel, and Susannah.

Susannah turns to me once I walk into the kitchen, “Where have you been?”

I smile, “At the beach.”

Jeremiah looks around, “Hey, where’s Conrad?” I felt everyone’s eyes peer on me and I groan. “How would I know?”

“I bet you he’s smoking pot.” Steven blurts out. We all let out a laugh when all the sudden Conrad, of all people comes through the door with muffins.

“Anyone want some?” He perks up.

“Yes man! First muffin run of the summer.” Steven says, patting the counter in front of him. Conrad places the muffins on the counter.

Conrad looks at me and sends me a half smile, and I could tell that Susannah noticed. She knew.

Belly was happy, and she didn’t seem to notice me and Conrad’s interaction. It was probably because it was her birthday tomorrow.

I grabbed the blueberry muffin, and I slightly frowned when I didn’t see a birthday cake muffin. I felt a head lean over my shoulder and close to my ear.

“They didn’t have any, sorry.” Conrad whispered.

He had read my mind. He still remembered. Jeremiah looked at us weirdly and then continued to eat his muffin. Belly noticed this time. She frowned.

“It’s okay.” I mumble. I could feel his breath touch my ears.

Jeremiah sighed, “I gotta get to the club.” And with that, him and Steven were gone within minutes.

Susannah send a half smile to Conrad, “Connie, don’t you have to be at the marina soon?” Lessons with Cleveland. I had heard about that.

“Besides, I wanna paint you when you come back.” Susannah added.

Conrad scratched the back of his head, and suddenly looked nervous. “Okay.”

After he left, me and Belly were the only ones at the house. I suddenly had the crazy idea to go for a swim. It wasn’t exactly crazy, but it was still something.

So here me and Belly were in the pool, taking laps and occasionally stopping to talk. It was then when she asked me out of the blue, “Have you talked to Conrad recently?”

I felt tense, “Um, I mean not much since we got here.”

“Okay.” She replies. We sat their silent for a minute, and then she said. “He just seems off. And this morning I kinda got a vibe from you guys like you had talked.”

I suddenly felt annoyed. Now i could even talk to him? At one time we had been best friends, and now their were rules? I hated it. It was all ruined.

Breaking the silence, susannah rushed outside, “Girls!We have to go Debb dress shopping!”

Thank God for you, Susannah.

—

Debb shopping was pretty boring. The whole time I thought about me and Belly’s interaction in the pool. We were sisters. Cousins by blood, but sisters at heart. I loved her. I always will. So i’m lying about Conrad, about everything, to save her.

“That was beautiful.” Susannah said as Belly laid out on display for everyone like a doll. She looked great, but it wasn’t Belly. Belly liked simple, I was just picky.

Now it was my turn. My turn to show off. I didn’t want to, but here I was on display for everyone, just like Belly was mer minutes ago.

Belly smiled, “You look so beautiful.”

I looked into the side mirror. It was a beautiful silk white; with straps and not really much design. I loved it though, it was really flattering.

“This is a maybe, we can look for others.” Susannah said. But I loved it. Laurel could tell and so could Belly. All of the sudden I thought about dancing with Conrad. Then I just felt guilty.

—

Conrad’s Pov:

I walked back to the house after giving Cleveland lessons. I saw my mother out on the porch, ready with her painting brushes and canvas. I didn’t want to do it, but I did it for her.

“Sit, Connie” She said, smiling. I suddenly felt sad. But I sat anyways.

She began to paint me, but she had this smug look on her face that only Susannah could make look sweet.

“So, me and Laurel went dress shopping with the girls.”

I nodded my head, “Nice.”

“yn looked beautiful in her dress.” She basically spat out in a loving but flirty manner. I knew what she was doing.

“Belly, too.” She added, attempting to cover her tracks.

“Mom, i’m not doing this with you.”

“What? I cant question you a little bit? You and yn were so close.”

I felt the heat pool in my body.

“I don’t wanna talk about it.”

“Tell me at least what happened?” She pleaded.

“We grew apart.” I said, angrily. More than I had intended and then I just felt horrible because Susannah nodded and continued.

Great fucking job, Conrad.

—

That night, I wanted to swim again. But alone.

I got on my bikini, it wasn’t fancy or anything just a plain blue, I kinda blended in with the water.

I wasn’t as good as Belly, I wouldn’t take laps like her. Sometimes I would just dunk my head under the water and sit there. I used to pretend to be a mermaid when I was younger. Under the water all my problems went away, and I would even pretend like I was in the ocean.

I dunked my head under the water, and then came up for air after a couple of seconds. I jumped when I saw him there.

He was sitting on the edge of the pool, dipping his ankles in. “Conrad, you scared me.”

He smiled a little, but it wasn’t a innocent one. “Sorry.”

“It’s fine” I said awkwardly. I dipped my head back under to fix my part, because suddenly I was self conscious.

When I came back up, he was smoking a joint. I rolled my eyes. “You really need to stop that.”

He scoffed, “Why?”

“It’s not good for you, you know that.”

He smirked, “The only reason you knew that is because i told you. I taught you that.”

I felt my cheeks burn a little but it quickly went away, what was he playing at?

“I still think you should quit though.”

Then, he looked up at me and with this smug look on his face, he said, “What will you give me if I do?”

I wasn’t even under the water, but I felt like drowning.

I fucking hate him. I love him at the same time.

“Quit for yourself, jackass.” I dunked my head back under the water, but when I came up he was gone.

If I screamed, would anyone hear?

Tomorrow was Belly’s birthday, my sisters birthday. A day about her. No one else. Conrad could play all these games, but he would only be playing with himself.

Not me. Not anymore.

—

AHHHH guys I promise we’ll get to the drama soon! Anyways susannah knows something guys ;) what do you think happened with Conrad and yn? Next one out sooooon

tag list: @kkrenae @callsignwidow @drikawinchester @johannelis2302nely

[hbyrde36]

Chapter 2: Housekeeping

No Vacancy

Chapter 1 AO3 link

Steve and Robin were kneeling side-by-side, wrist deep in dirt pulling weeds and planting new annuals in the red brick planter box that surrounded the motel's sign. It was his first full day off since he’d arrived in town, and even in the midst of manual labor in the sweltering heat, he was enjoying having a little time in the sunshine without having to keep an eye on tourists who didn’t understand how dangerous an undertow could be. He didn’t mind being put to work, in fact he’d ask for this. He knew it was the only way he was going to get to spend some quality time with his best friend, as busy as she was. 

He dipped his head, blinking away the sweat that had trickled into his eyes while they worked. It was late morning, and though the day had started out at a semi-comfortable 75 degrees or so, it was now nearing the mid 90’s and rising. 

“You know you don’t have to help out around here. You are a paying guest after all.” Robin said, not for the first time since they had started this little project. 

“Yeah, but only because I forced you to take my money.” Steve pointed out. 

She rolled her eyes. “I maintain that I owe you enough in gas money from all the rides you’ve given me over the years that you should have your own room here forever free of charge.” 

“No, this is your livelihood. Just take it, I don’t mind paying.”

“Oh I'm taking the money, because god knows we could use it, but don’t be surprised when I find a way to slip it back to you one day.”

Steve grinned. He had no doubt she would do just that. 

Hanging out with Robin wasn’t his only motivation for seeking out tasks around the building in his downtime. He’d become so used to being up and out by dawn every morning, that he hadn’t known what to do with himself when he woke up that day. Though he was off, he still found himself wide awake by 6AM, his body’s natural alarm waking him up at the time it was used to. He had nowhere to go, and nowhere he had to be, but the thought of hanging around while Eddie was asleep, or worse, of being there when Eddie woke up made him jittery. 

Still, he had taken a few minutes to lay quietly in the dim light of their room and gaze at the man resting in the other bed, something he hadn’t allowed himself to do before. He admired the spill of Eddie’s dark curls across the stark white of the pillow case, and the fullness of his lips as they curved into the hint of a smile, reacting no doubt to whatever pleasant dream he was having. Steve longed to comb his fingers through all that hair, and to feel those lips against his own, but he knew he was more likely to get struck by lightning than to ever be allowed the privilege to touch Eddie Munson. 

Steve knew he was unwelcome in their shared space, and no matter how desperately he wanted to show Eddie that he wasn’t the same asshole he remembered from high school, it was hard to do that when they so rarely crossed paths. That hurdle was what had given him the idea to start leaving fresh coffee behind for the other man. It was a small gesture really, that didn’t cost him any extra time or money, but he hoped Eddie recognized it for the olive branch that it was. Maybe coffee wasn’t enough though. How did the old saying go? The way to a man’s heart is through his stomach. Steve wondered what sort of breakfast pastry said, 'I like you and I want to be friends.'

Muffins?

Croissants?

He could always ask Chrissy for advice on Eddie’s favorite foods, but he wasn’t sure he could manage to do that without revealing his unfortunate crush. 

After a little more internal struggle he’d gotten out of bed, dressed quickly in his last pair of clean cut off shorts, that were admittedly a little too tight, and a white tank top. It was still too early for most of the world to be awake, so he went for a walk around the neighborhood to clear his head until he could bother Robin, though not before he set the coffee pot to brew like he had every other morning.

Robin cleared her throat, an unsubtle indicator that she was about to say something he wouldn’t like. Steve braced himself. 

“I meant to tell you,” she began casually, poking around with her small shovel without actually moving any dirt. “A guest in the room next to yours called in a noise complaint the other night. Apparently there was a bit of banging and some loud moans. Anything you want to share with the class?”

Steve opened and closed his mouth several times before responding. “Yeah…Sorry about that. Eddie, um, brought someone home from the bar. I would offer to talk to him about it for you, but I'm pretty sure he hates me, so maybe it would be better if Chrissy said something to him about it.”

Robin stared, mouth hanging open in disbelief. “What?!”

He squirmed under her scrutiny as he peered down into the small hole he was digging instead of meeting her intense gaze. “He brought someone home. It wasn’t a big deal. I went down to the pool area and slept on one of the chairs for a while to give them some privacy. It was fine.”

Robin rubbed at her temples, the dirt from her hands flaking off into her hair. “Jesus, Steve. I’m sorry. I thought…” She trailed off. 

He tensed. “Thought what?”

“I thought you two had finally gotten your shit together! I should have known better when you came to me all mopey this morning asking for busy work on your only day off.”

Steve gulped, his heart skipping a beat. Had he been that obvious all this time? He thought he’d been hiding his feelings pretty well. 

“I have no idea what you’re talking about.” He lied, knowing full well it would never get through her bullshit meter undetected.

No, hmm?” she hummed. “Tell me, which part are you confused about? The one where you’ve had a massive crush on Eddie since high school, or, the part where Eddie also has a huge crush on you that he hides by pretending he hates you?”

“Neither of those things is true. And I'm not mopey!” He said, pointing his trowel at her threateningly.

Robin gave him a sarcastic, yet sympathetic smile before patting him on the head like a dog. “Steve, sweetie, platonic love of my life, you are so full of shit. I’ve watched for months, years even, as you hung on every word Chrissy said about Eddie. Did you really think I wouldn't notice?”

“Fine. If I admit that I like him will you please drop this?” He begged.

“No.”

Steve raked a hand over his face, smearing dirt along his nose and forehead in the process. 

“Tell me more about this dude he brought home.” Robin said.

Steve threw his hands up in the air. “I don’t know… it was 3AM! I was still half asleep when I walked past the guy.”

Robin’s eyes went wide. “Wait, wait, wait, 3AM?!” Did Eddie wake you up in the middle of the night and make you leave your room so he could get it on with some other guy?”

He groaned. “Please don’t ever say ‘get it on’ to me again.”

She stood, wiping her hands off on her pants as she rose. “I’m gonna kill him.” She said, and started to march off in the direction of his and Eddie’s room. 

Steve panicked, knowing she would only make things worse and they were tense enough as it was. 

He jumped to his feet and grabbed her wrist, holding her back. “Stop! It’s fine. We sort of talked about it ahead of time. I knew this was a possibility.”

“Why on earth would you agree to that?!”

“What was I supposed to say, Robs?!” Steve shouted back. “Oh, sorry Eddie. I know you hate me and everything because I was such a dick back in school, but I've sort of been pining over you from afar for the better part of a decade, and it’s gonna kill me to see you hook up with other people!!”

Steve sucked in a breath, suddenly remembering that they were out in public where anyone could overhear. He looked frantically around the courtyard but luckily the coast seemed to be clear. 

“I’m sorry.” Robin said, voice gone soft. She threw her arms around his shoulders and hugged him tightly. 

He sagged against her, taking the comfort she offered for a minute before pulling away. “It’s okay. I knew what I was putting myself through when I agreed to share the room.”

“Can’t you at least tell him he had to take his hook-ups somewhere else? It’s not an unreasonable request for a roommate. You should talk to him the next time you guys hang out.”

“What part of, he hates me, do you not understand? We don’t hang out.” Steve said.

 Robin shook her head. “He doesn’t hate you, trust me.”

He rolled his eyes. “I’ll believe that, when you believe that you have a shot with Chrissy “

“That is completely different, dingus!”

“How?” He asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Well for one thing, we’re actually friends,” she fired back. “And I don't want to mess that up.”

“Ouch.”

“Sorry.” Robin winced. “I don’t know, Steve. Maybe I could have told her before we bought this place, but now we’re in business together. If I told her how I felt and she didn’t feel the same way it could ruin everything!.”

Steve didn’t think there was a chance in hell that Chrissy wasn’t just as crazy about Robin as Robin was about her, but he understood the hesitation. She did have a good point. Besides, who was he to judge? 

“I guess we’ll both just have to keep suffering in silence then.” He said.

She clinked her small shovel against his as if they were toasting with wine glasses. “At least we’ll be in our misery together.”

Eventually they were done with the flowers and Steve had no more excuse to put off going back to his room. He badly needed to do some laundry, he was completely out of clean swim trunks, and Robin needed to get back behind the front desk. He hoped that Eddie was awake now at least. 

Steve paused to admire their handiwork before walking away. 

“Hey, I just noticed something.” He said, waving Robin over to his side. “Why isn’t the ‘no’ on your ‘no vacancy’ sign lit? I thought you were booked up?”

“Oh, I, uh, yea.” Robin sputtered. “I have a call into our maintenance guy about it. He just hasn’t had the chance to get out here yet. I think there’s a bulb out or a loose wire or something. It’s no big deal.”

Steve frowned. “Do you want me to have a look at it for you? I’m pretty handy these days.”

“NO! I mean, thank you, but it’s under control. Andreas said he was coming tomorrow. I don't want him to think we’re cheating on him with another maintenance man.” She laughed awkwardly. “You won’t always be around, and this place would fall apart without him, so I wouldn't want to jeopardize that.”

Steve eyed her curiously. Something definitely felt…off, but he couldn’t put his finger on what. He was probably just being paranoid. Maybe she was worried he would break something.

He gave a half-shrug. “Whatever you say.”

Steve took several deep breaths as he climbed the stairs up to the second floor, trying to calm his nerves before facing Eddie.  He unlocked the door and sighed in relief, realizing that the room was empty. It was a little early for Eddie to be at the bar, but maybe they’d needed him to come in ahead of his shift for some reason. Either way, he was grateful for the moment alone with his thoughts, even if he was a little disappointed. 

Steve sat on the end of his bed and rested his head in his hands. He knew he shouldn’t be this hung up on a guy he barely knew, let alone one that couldn’t stand to be around him. It was silly, honestly, considering they hadn’t actually spent that much time together, or any time really. He had precious few memories of watching Eddie from the shadows of his own popularity. Most of what he knew about the guy had come third party through Chrissy and Robin. Maybe he just needed to get out more.

He’d been something of a serial dater in his teens, but by his senior year of high school he thought he’d found ‘the one’, in a girl named Nancy wheeler. After a soul-crushing breakup in the bathroom of a Halloween party that neither of them had even wanted to go to, Steve had sworn off the whole institution, at least for a while. 

He found Robin soon after, his actual one true love, when they both worked the same after school job at an ice cream shop, and she became the best friend he’d always wanted.  

Their friendship had been enough for him for a while. He went to the community college so he could stay close by while she finished her own senior year and they spent just about every waking moment together. Then Robin graduated and went off to her fancy school a whole state away, and his grades hadn’t been good enough to follow her. 

They still saw each other as often as they could. He would drive up on Friday nights and sleep over in her dorm room for the whole weekend, but then she met Chrissy. Two hometown acquaintances who just happened to go to the same school. Suddenly the former band geek and the former cheerleading captain became the best of friends, with the potential to be more to anyone with eyes, and Steve worried that he would soon become a perpetual third wheel.

So, he started to put himself out there again. He went on a fair few dates with women, and even more with men, once he’d finally accepted his bisexuality and discovered he had a heavy preference for them. In the back of his mind, Steve had always known he was attracted to boys, but made the choice to ignore that part of himself because it was easier and safer to just be straight. In the end, all it took was one drunken weekend hook up at a frat party on Robin and Chrissy’s campus to open his eyes to everything he’d been denying himself. 

It made him look back and remember things he'd tried hard to forget about. Like his crush on an old classmate that he’d thought was long over, but came rushing back with a vengeance when he realized that the Eddie from all of Chrissy’s stories about her own male best friend, was the same long-haired metalhead that Steve used to daydream about in English class. Suddenly he was listening with rapt attention to each detail she shared, and was more than happy to see every picture and post card the man sent her, even if his handwriting was illegible. He found himself much less interested in dating after that.

When Robin had first asked him to bunk with Eddie, after realizing her mistake, he’d been so excited thinking that maybe he’d finally have a chance with the guy. Those hopes were quickly shattered when he saw the panicked look on Eddie’s face as he’d walked into the motel lobby. 

There was no use moping about it now. Steve stood and blew out a long breath. He just had to make it through the summer. 12 weeks, 11 now actually. He could do this. 

He washed his hands and wiped a wet washcloth over his face to get the worst of the dirt off in an effort to be more presentable, but only a shower would do the job properly. That would have to wait until after he got his laundry done. He picked up his pajama pants from where he’d left them on the floor that morning and added them to the heavy mesh bag of dirty clothes before hoisting it over his shoulder and setting out for the laundromat. 

The place Robin had told him to go was less than a mile from the motel, so he decided to make his way there on foot. He took his time, admiring the old Victorian houses with their lavish gardens as he passed by. He hadn’t really understood why Robin and Chrissy wanted to move here after college until he’d seen the place for himself. It was beautiful, and it felt like life moved slower here, or maybe it just seemed that way because almost everyone you met was on vacation. 

Steve finally reached his destination, and felt his heart sink into his shoes as he spotted a familiar head of dark curls sitting by the big front windows. He froze with his hand on the door, seriously considering running away and finding another place to do his wash. There had to be other laundromats in town. He would travel if he had to, anything to not be stuck in there waiting for his clothes to finish all while Eddie either ignored him or glared at him. The decision was taken out of his hands entirely when he realized the other man had turned and was now staring directly at him through the glass. He probably looked like an idiot standing out there like a deer in headlights, not moving, so he of course overcompensated, quickly swinging the door open and throwing himself through it.

Eddie, for his part, looked a little stunned at Steve’s sudden appearance as well, which made him feel the tiniest bit better about it. Steve tried to save some face by smiling and giving the other man a little nod in greeting as he moved past on his way to the machines, but judging by the way Eddie continued to stare, he must have missed the mark of coming off cool and casual by a mile. 

He busied himself with separating his laundry into two of the washers, one for lights, one for darks, and tried to ignore the way he could still feel Eddie’s heavy gaze on him. He felt his whole body flush under the attention, and his heart was pounding so loud he thought anyone standing nearby would be able to hear it. 

When all of that was done he had no other choice but to make his way to the only seating in the establishment, the small grouping of chairs where Eddie currently sat. He willed himself to calm down and was pleased to find that by the time he turned around Eddie was no longer looking his way, and was instead seemingly engrossed in this month’s edition of Rolling Stone.

Steve took a seat, skipping a chair to keep a polite distance between the two of them, and wishing he’d had the foresight to bring along a book or his walkman. He settled for a two year old Life magazine that someone had left on a side table in the waiting area. He wasn’t reading it so much as he was staring at it to avoid looking anywhere else. The two men sat in a tense silence for about five full minutes before Steve felt eyes on him again.

“I thought you were working today.” Eddie blurted out.

Steve flinched a little at the sound of his voice, but managed to play it off like he was flicking the hair out of his face. “No, I..um. Uh, finally got a day off.” Steve stuttered through his response, wondering how he’d ever been considered a smooth talker or a ladies man. Couldn’t prove it by him now.

“Right. Yeah, same here.” Eddie said. 

There was another long beat of quiet and Steve thought maybe he should say something else, try and strike up a conversation or something. He could do that, that was a normal thing for two guys who were essentially roommates, right? He was trying out a few different lines in his head when Eddie spoke again. 

“It's just that you were gone when I woke up, so I thought…” He trailed off.

“I was helping Robin with some planting in the courtyard, flowers and stuff.” Steve offered, thrilled at getting out something resembling a complete human sentence this time. 

“Oh. That was…nice of you.” Eddie said with a furrowed brow.

Steve shrugged and tried hard to think of something to say next. Eddie had asked him a question, sort of. Well, he’d given him an opening to talk about his day at least. He should do something similar, he figured, but it was like his mind went blank every time he looked into Eddie's eyes. 

“How are things with your, um, friend, from the other night?” Steve asked, and immediately wanted to throw himself through the window.

Oh God. Why! 

Why had he picked that to say? What possessed him to bring up something so unbelievably awkward when this whole exchange had been, thus far, borderline unbearable. 

Eddie blinked a few times in surprise, cheeks flushing pink as he answered. “Oh, that was just a one time thing, y’know? I don’t even remember the guy’s name.”

“Oh. That’s…cool.”

“Is it?” Eddie’s expression hardened. “Or is King Steve of all people about to slut shame me for a one night stand?”

“I didn’t mean…”

“Sure you didn’t. You were single-handedly responsible for taking the virginity of who knows how many of the girls back in Hawkins, and you’re gonna sit here and judge me for sleeping with one guy?”

“No!” Steve insisted. “I’m sorry, I swear I wasn’t trying to judge you, and I certainly wasn’t shaming you. You just…” 

“I. Just. What?” Eddie asked through a clenched jaw.

Steve sank down in his seat and sighed. “You just make me really nervous, Eddie.”

Of all the things Steve had said, this seemed to be the one that most threw the other man for a loop. He sat there staring at Steve in stunned silence for several seconds and then started cackling loudly.

Steve was almost offended. He’d told the truth, been vulnerable even. What was so fucking funny about the idea of him being nervous?

“I make you nervous?” Eddie managed to say between laughing fits. “That’s a good one, big boy.”

Big boy.

Steve crossed his arms over his chest, pretending like that nickname hadn’t short-circuited his brain for a second. He tried to frown but it was hard to do when Eddie’s eyes sparkled like that and his dimples were on full display. 

Eddie took pity on him and eventually got himself under control. “Okay Steve, I believe that you didn’t mean anything by it.”

“Thanks.”

“How long have you got on your washers?” Eddie asked abruptly, glancing up at a big clock that hung above the door.

“About 30 minutes or so. Why?”

Eddie rose from his seat and inclined his head towards the door. “Come on.” 

“Where are we going?”

“There's a little cafe on the corner, unless you’re not hungry?”

“No, I mean yes, I could eat.” Steve said.

“Good. Let’s go then, my treat.”

Steve hesitated, feeling a bit like he was suffering from whiplash. “Why?”

Eddie smirked. “Because I’m starting to think maybe I've been a little too hard on you, but I can't be sure. I figure, before I continue to be an asshole I should probably try and get to know you to make sure you deserve it first.”

Lunch with Eddie was great. Not the food, although that was good too, it was nothing compared to the company. Steve found that Eddie was surprisingly easy to talk to once he got started. He felt like he was finally given the chance to explain that in reality, he was nothing like his former high school persona. That it had been a combination of the fear of disappointing his parents, and good old peer pressure that had led him to accept his role as king of hawkins high. He told Eddie that going along with the popular crowd and being friends with Tommy and Carol were among his biggest regrets in life, and there was a lot he’d change if he could go back.

“Unfortunately I didn’t have my big epiphany until halfway through senior year, right around the time Nancy dumped me and I met Robin. At that point it didn’t seem worth it to try and fix my reputation, so I just let people keep thinking I was the same asshole I always had been, and tried to keep my head down until graduation.”

“And yet you wound up right back where you started.” Eddie said.

“What do you mean?” Steve asked with narrowed eyes.

“Well, you’re a gym teacher back in Hawkins now, aren’t you?”

Steve couldn’t stop the grin that spread across his face. “How did you know?”

Eddie laughed. “Robin talks about you a lot, sometimes I even listen.”

“Yea, yea. I know, laugh it up. Failed former jock becomes a middle school gym teacher. I’m a walking cliché.”

“Not all cliché’s are bad.” Eddie shrugged. “Do you like it?”

“Yes, and no. The kids are great, but I never meant to stay in Hawkins.”

“Now that, Harrington, I understand completely.”

“I bet. How many different cities have you lived in now?”

Eddie raised an eyebrow.

“Chrissy.” Steve answered simply. “I listen too, and I’ve seen all the photos and postcards.” He admitted.

Eddie gasped. “Even the art prints from San Francisco?” He covered his face like he was embarrassed but Steve could see him peeking through his fingers. It was adorable.

Steve nodded, fighting to keep his expression serious. “I found them very tasteful.”

Eddie laughed again, and it was quickly becoming Steve's favorite sound in the world. 

“Alright, Stevie, even I can admit when I'm wrong. Maybe you’re not such a bad guy after all.”

They sat in the cafe talking until long after their food was gone, and the plates had been cleared, eventually moving their conversation back to the laundromat when Steve remembered he still had to put his things in the dryer. Eddie shared a little of his own background, how he’d come to live with his uncle at the beginning of 5th grade. That Wayne had been a better parent to him than either of his actual parents ever had been.

He told Steve that he’d left Hawkins because the people there didn’t understand him. They looked down on him. Thought he was a freak, trailer trash, and would amount to nothing more than a drug dealer. He said he could never see himself moving back there but that he wished he could visit his uncle more.

Something shifted between the two of them that afternoon. The animosity Eddie had been projecting at him was gone like it never existed. He was friendly, flirty even at times, and Steve was on cloud nine, even if he did feel like he was going to pass out every time Eddie smiled at him or casually bumped his shoulder. He wasn’t naive enough to think that Eddie meant anything by it, he knew his crush was one-sided no matter what Robin said, but at least now he felt like there was a real chance that they could actually be friends.

Chapter 3

@penny00dreadful @every-aj-needs-an-angel @manda-panda-monium @hellion-child @dreamwatch @brbsoulnomming @epiclazershark @estrellami-1 @lokfae @raisedbylibrarians @impala314 @meganwinchester @kacatshi @warlordess

As always just let me know if you want to be added or removed from the tag list!

[ladykailitha]

Star Child Part 9

Hello!! We find out the name of Eddie’s roadie that spotted the problem at the bar in Part 6. We delve into Steve’s problems a bit. And we meet Steve’s badass lawyer.

Pt 1 Pt 2 Pt 3 Pt 4 Pt 5 Pt 6 Pt 7 Pt 8

***

Steve woke up at 6am like he always did. He knew that he wouldn’t be hearing from any of the Corroded Coffin boys until later in the morning but he was anxious to be doing something, anything. So he messaged Lucas that he was going to go for a run and hopped into the shower.

He was pleasantly surprised to see the man dressed for running in shorts and a tank top. Steve nodded appreciatively.

“Just a heads up,” he said, setting his smart watch for the run, “I’ve had a really anxious last couple of days and I tend to run harder to combat that.”

Lucas half shrugged. “I’m game for whatever you’ve got, man. I assure you.”

Steve laughed and started stretching. Lucas did the same and once they were fully stretched, they started off. Steve began slow and ramped up, faster and faster until they had hit a full on sprint.

They arrived back at the house, panting and sweating up a storm.

“Damn,” Lucas huffed, hands on his knees and head hung between his shoulders. “You weren’t kidding about that run. Shit.”

Steve laughed. “I haven’t had someone keep up with me before.”

Lucas stood up and put his hands on his back. “I used to play basketball in high school and college. Until I hurt my knee pretty bad.”

“Made it so you were unable to play?” Steve asked, leading them into the house for water and the AC.

“Actually,” Lucas said, taking the water bottle from Steve, “I fully recovered, but it was the team that had moved on. That’s when I realized it would be the same if I got in the NBA. I’d be traded around like a bad birthday present instead being treated like a person and went fuck that shit.”

Steve nodded and hopped up on the counter. “I used to play sports before I got into the whole singing thing. Originally my dad had me playing three sports to triple my chances of making money off of me. And then realized that he could make more with me as a pop star.”

He opened his bottle of water and took a long drink.

Lucas chugged his all in one gulp before tossing it in the trash. “What sports did you play?”

“Basketball,” Steve said, cocking his head to the side and held out his hand, point to Lucas, “like you. Let’s see...baseball and swimming. Did a couple others like boxing and wrestling in PE, but nothing worth writing home about. But yeah. I made captain of the basketball team and co-captain of the swim. I enjoyed them well enough. But singing, man? That’s it for me. I love it.”

“But you kept it with the sports after you made it big?” Lucas asked.

“Sure,” Steve murmured. “Most hotels have swimming pools and you can always find a place with a couple of hoops for a game or two.” He shrugged his shoulders. “Three fourths of The Kings played on the basketball team in high school, only Jonathan didn’t.”

“My sister was a big fan of The Kings when she was in high school,” Lucas said, leaning against the counter next to Steve and crossing her arms. “Billy was her favorite until she found out he was racist asshole.”

Steve grimaced. “Yeah, that was a PR nightmare, let me tell you.”

“I can’t even begin to imagine,” Lucas agreed. “What are your plans for today?”

“I’m meeting with a top contract lawyer to get my label off my ass,” Steve said, throwing his bottle in the trash can and making it. Lucas raised an impressed eyebrow. “My label is pissed that once this album is done and I go on tour, that’s it. I’m done with them.”

“This the same label that hired security to spy on you?” Lucas asked.

“That’s them,” Steve groused. “My manager made sure the terms were air tight in our favor but they’re trying to wiggle out of it.”

“Bastards.”

Steve shook his head. “You have no idea.”

“What’s the lawyer’s name?” Lucas asked with a tilt of his head.

Steve frowned. “Actually, I don’t recall.” He got up and went to the cork board next to fridge and began scanning for the business card. “Ah ha!” He plucked the card off the board and walked back to Lucas and handed him the card.

“Gillibrand, Farnsworth, and Hayward, Associates at Law,” Steve said. “I’m meeting with Erica Hayward.”

“Yeah...” Lucas said, drawing out the word. “I hope you’re looking for a scorched earth approach to this record label.”

Steve shrugged. “I wouldn’t be opposed. Why? Do you know them or something?”

Lucas winced. “I’d better. Erica Hayward is my little sister.”

*

Steve was relieved when Eddie called from the airport.

“Hey, Eds,” Steve said softly. “Everyone make it out all right?”

“Everything is fine beautiful,” Eddie said. “Chrissy is a certified genius. We actually have two tour buses, one that we keep stored in Evansville in case this one breaks down. So she had the bus haul ass down to Austin and we played a little bit of shell game with Creel’s goons.”

Steve laughed. “That’s fantastic! I was so worried about it, I was about to recommend my security company to you.”

“I thought you were notorious for blowing off your security detail,” Eddie said with a chuckle.

Steve walked out to the swimming pool and sat down on one of the loungers, “Used to. Back when they were spies for my parents and the record label. Got my own company now. They’ve been pretty good so far. Robin wanted someone to watch my back as I drove to LA.”

“And they passed muster, then?” Eddie asked with a fond smile.

“Yeah,” Steve said, laying back on the lounger. “They’re from Indiana, too and not Caifornia but they do have locations all around the country, LA included, of course.”

“Of course,” Eddie said. “But you don’t have to worry on that front, Stevie. My roadies double as security. Trust me when I say no one messes with us when they’re nearby.”

“Okay, Eds,” Steve said. “I hate how Creel tried to come after you guys. You especially.”

“I’ll just sic Mike on him,” Eddie said with laugh. “That bastard is so surly that I’ve seen him stare down a biker gang and win.”

“Yeah?” Steve asked. “He built like a tank or something?”

Eddie laughed again. “No, baby. Mike Wheeler is most definitely not built like a tank.”

Steve sat up in a flash and scrambled to get to his photos on his phone. “Is this him?”

“Why do you have a picture of my roadie on your phone?” Eddie asked, genuinely confused.

“You remember Nancy?” Steve asked. “The ex currently dating my former bandmate Jonanthan Byers.”

“Sure,” Eddie said. “From the Indie Dolls, right?”

Steve hummed in agreement.

“Rumor was,” Eddie continued, “that she didn’t even wait for the bed to get cold before she shacked up with Byers.”

Steve scoffed. “Bitch didn’t even wait for that. She full on cheated on me with Jonathan.”

“Shit.”

“Yeah,” Steve said through gritted teeth. “Mike Wheeler is Nancy Wheeler’s little brother.”

“Fuck.” It was quiet on the line for a moment. “Really?”

“Small world,” Steve said. “He doesn’t like me much, but if he’s your guard dog, I’ll sleep soundly knowing he’s got your back.”

“And I’m glad you’ve got someone watching your back too, sweetheart,” Eddie replied.

Steve looked at his watch and sighed. “I’ve got let you go. I’ve got to get ready for my appointment. Fly safe.”

“Will do, sweet thing,” Eddie said and hung up.

Steve stared at his phone for a moment before he got up and went back in the house.

*

Max was waiting by a black sedan when Steve walked out of his house an hour later. He paused briefly at the bottom step and blinked at the sight. He then shrugged and half jogged to the car.

“Steve,” Max greeted. “We’ll be picking Robin Buckley up and then to your appointment. Lucas gave me the run down of the office and I know where all the exits are.”

Steve nodded and got into the backseat of the car. Max hopped into in the passenger seat. Steve could barely make out the driver.

They got to Robin’s house and she just bounded into the car without missing a beat. She slid into the middle so she could sit next to Steve.

“Now,” Max began once they were both settled, “Steve is my main priority, however I will do whatever it takes to keep you both safe.”

“Roger that!” Robin said with a jaunty salute.

They pulled up in front of a large office building with the names Gillibrand, Farnsworth, and Hayward in neat black letters on the bronze plaque next to the main doors.

Max followed close behind as Robin and Steve walked up to the receptionist’s desk.

“Steve Harrington to see Erica Hayward at 2pm?” Steve said smoothly.

The receptionist typed something on her screen and nodded. “Fifth floor, suite five hundred. Speak to her PA and he’ll let you in.”

“Thank you,” Steve said and tapped the front desk twice.

They walked to the elevator.

Everything about the place screamed opulence and elegance. They exited the elevator and this floor was even more elegant than the ground floor. It was all white marble and brass fittings.

Steve squirmed a little. It reminded him a little much of the home he grew up in. Fancy and faceless.

Robin took his hand and gently pulled him down the hallway to suite 500. She opened the glass door and led the way to the PA’s desk. The office was black marble and mahogany. Steve started tapping his finger against the side of his thigh nervously.

“Two o’clock appointment,” Robin said, “for Steve Harrington.”

The PA nodded. “She’ll be with you in a moment. Her last appointment ran late.”

Steve sat down, but both Robin and Max stood.

“I should have scoped out the place first,” Robin whispered mournfully. “I forgot lawyers like to be intimidating.”

Steve squeezed her hand. “It’s okay, Robs.”

Max cocked her head thoughtfully. “Janice mentioned something about you not being comfortable around opulence and extravagance. I’ve seen her history write-up of you, it’s a little thin on why.”

Robin and Steve shared a glance.

“That’s a story you guys might get if you continue to be awesome,” Robin said. “But it’s way too early for that shit.”

Max frowned. “It really is better to tell your security about all your pitfalls and fears because if you’re afraid of spiders and freak out, our reaction might be a tad elevated for the scenario if you get me.”

Steve made a finger gun and mimicked the sound of gun going off.

“Right in one, pretty boy.”

Robin chewed her bottom lip nervously.

“It’s okay, Robs,” Steve said. “She’s right they need to know.”

Robin threw her hands up in the air. “Fine, I’ll send the file over to Janice.”

Max’s eyes went as wide as saucers. “A file?!”

Steve nodded.  

“Erica’s ready for you,” the PA interrupted.

Steve got up and followed Robin into the office, Max following close behind.

They got into the office and there was the most gorgeous black woman sitting behind a desk that matched the outer office.

She stood up to shake Robin and Steve’s hand before squealing and hugging Max.

“Max!” Erica said. “When is that loggerheaded brother of mine going to put a ring on that finger?”

Max laughed, hugging her back. “The last time he brought it up, I threatened to take out both of his knee caps.”

Erica stepped back and looked at Max appreciatively. “Fair. Speaking of Lucas, why isn’t he here instead of you?”

Max winced. “He was going to.” Erica raised a skeptical eyebrow. “No, really he was. But one of our clients had a break in last night so he was taking care of that until the early hours of the morning. Then he ran with Steve this morning, followed by the debriefing with Janice after about the break in. He barely got to bed an hour before this appointment.”

Steve raised an appreciative eyebrow. 

Erica grimaced. “Ouch. Okay, he’s forgiven this time.” She turned to Steve and Robin. “Please sit. Tell me more about your case.”

Steve sat down and fiddled with the hem of his button down shirt. “This place is very intimidating.”

Erica smiled like a shark. “It’s meant to be.”

Steve shrugged. “If you hadn’t been so highly recommended,” he waved at Max, “and the sister of one of my security detail, I wouldn’t have even walked in. I would have found myself a different lawyer.”

“And you probably would have lost your case,” Erica said returning his shrug.

“Maybe,” Steve said. “But if I don’t feel comfortable with you as a lawyer, how can I trust you to handle my case the way I want it handled?”

Erica frowned appreciatively and nodded. “That’s fair, I suppose. But you have to understand, every single one of the partners at this firm is a black woman that had to claw her way to the top of the food chain. Dismissed, discredited, and disrespected,” she explained, moving to sit down at her desk.

“Patrica Farnsworth is the top attorney in trademarks and copyright law in LA, but because she’s a black woman, she was passed over time and time again for mediocre white men. Ophelia Gillibrand is the top lawyer in town for fair use and transformative works. She even volunteers part of her time to archives for fan fiction. But just like Patrica, overlooked and under paid.”

She sighed. “We are only respected because of how this place looks and is run. But I don’t doubt we’ve lost good clients because of it, too. It’s double-edged sword, but one we have to carry.”

Steve nodded. “You’ve convinced me,” he said with a cheeky smile. “So let me fill you in.”

As Max watched she suddenly knew why they needed to send over a file about Steve’s hangups. Because holy fuck was that some pretty heavy shit he was telling Erica.

Once they were done, Erica rubbed her hands together. “I love cases like these. They’re usually very quick and very brutal. Plus, I think with a couple of days of digging I can get the whole fucking contract thrown out and you can start writing whatever the fuck you want by the end of the week.”

Robin and Steve shared a surprised glance.

“What do you mean?” Robin asked.

“They blackmailed Steve into the contract,” Erica sneered, “holding his past over his head. That’s illegal. And if I’m right, and I usually am, I can get criminal charges brought up against your parents and the label.”

Steve blinked. “Lucas said you would take a scorched earth approach.”

Erica cocked her head smugly. “It’s what I do.”

“Then have at it,” Robin said gleefully. “Carte blanche, money is no object. Have at thee.”

Steve nodded. “Agreed. Take these assholes to school.”

“With pleasure.”

***

Part 10  Part 11  Part 12  Part 13  Part 14 Part 15  Part 16

Tag List:

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[hwaberry-dreams]

FIFTEEN: traditional first date

Warnings: swearing, brief suggestive (oral f receiving)

Word Count: 10.4k (sorry, it's a long one!)

Taglist: @kiwibaekie @fudgeflyssworld @kodzukein @elk-1998 @khjcoo @pepperony-7 @ateez-babygirl @starillusion13 @stephy-nicole13 @truthbehindthereflection @livingdeadlisa @stayteezdreams @atinyapple1117

I wake up with a start as a thudding noise comes from beside me. The top half of my body bolts upright and my eyes open wide as I look in the direction the noise came from. I see a rather scared looking Hongjoong right beside me, staring back at me, his eyes as wide as mine probably are right now.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to wake you up or give you a fright!” he says quietly

“It is ok Hongjoong.” I reply, running a hand through my hair as my other goes to my chest. I can feel my heart racing through my skin.

He leans down and picks up his laptop from the floor. I am assuming he must have dropped it and that made the noise that woke me up. I glance over at the clock on the wall and squint my eyes to see the time - 8.49am. I realise my 6am alarm did not wake me up and I look around for my phone, then remember that I had left it in my bedroom last night before I came upstairs. I hope it didn’t wake up the guys on the 2nd floor, especially San whose bedroom is above mine.

I look down beside me to see Seonghwa is fast asleep. He looks so peaceful. “I hope it is ok that I slept in here. Seonghwa insisted it was.” I say, looking back at Hongjoong. Although Wooyoung had already told me it was ok for me to sleep in the shared rooms, I was still a bit on edge. I didn’t want to make the other person feel uncomfortable in their private space. And both times I have slept in these rooms, the other person wasn’t there and therefore had no choice to sleep in the room with me in there.

“Of course it is Luna. I don’t mind at all.” He smiles softly, but I can see something in his eyes that said the opposite. His face looks awkward as he turns away from me and walks over to his bed.

“Wait, are you going to the studio?” I ask as I see him pick up the bag he always takes to work.

“Er.. yeah.” He replies, his hand rubbing the back of his neck.

“You are off work! It’s bad enough you went in last night after performing all day and then the fansigns and calls afterwards. I know you didn’t get home until at least 3am too!” I knew it was after 3am because I had woken up in the middle of the night to use the toilet and saw he wasn’t back yet.

“Actually, it was closer to 5am.” he says sheepishly, avoiding looking at me.

“Hongjoong!” I scold lightly, standing up from the bed. “You are going home today, so why are you going to the studio?”

“I am not leaving until 3pm, so I can easily fit in a couple of hours at the studio. I am working on the new Japanese song and I cannot get it to sound right. It is really bugging me and I won’t be able to relax if I don’t fix it. I know I can do it before I go home and it will mean I can fully relax on my time off because I know all my work is done,” he says. “I will be back here at 2pm!”

“You better relax, mister!!” I say. “If I find out you did any work when you go home, I will not be happy with you!” I add, as he laughs.

“What will you do?” He asks, stepping closer to me, his hands reaching for my waist.

“Hmmm, I’d definitely have to punish you.” I reply as he pulls me into his body, his hands staying fixed on either side of my body.

“Maybe I’d like to be punished.” He grins and I feel my tummy flip.

“I don’t think you’d like my idea of a punishment, though.” I say, placing my hands on his shoulders.

“and what would that entail?”

“Lots and lots and lots of English homework!” I raise an eyebrow at him as he bursts into laughter. “Maybe even make you speak only English for an entire day as well.”

“Oh, you have an evil streak in you!” He laughs, his hands snaking around my waist.

“I certainly do.” I grin as he pulls me into his body. “So don’t let my big innocent eyes fool you!”

“I better not get on your bad side then.” He says, the corner of his mouth curling into a smirk. The one he is well known for on stage. The one that, hopefully unknowingly to him, can turn me into putty in an instant. My eyes fall down to his lips as they move towards mine and just as they touch, a loud groan comes from behind us. Hongjoong pulls his head back and steps backwards, letting go of me as we turn to see Seonghwa rolling over in his bed and stretching. “I should go.” Hongjoong says softly.

I watch as he continues to collect his things as Seonghwa sits up in bed. My eyes return to Seonghwa as he looks up at me with one eye open and his hair sticking up in every direction, pushing his body back to lean slightly upright against the headboard and pillows. “Morning Luna.” he smiles lazily at me, his voice deep and crackly from sleep.

“Good morning.” I say to him as I sit back on the bed beside him, his head falling onto my shoulder, making me smile more.

“I will see you two later on.” Hongjoong says to us. “I promise I will be back at 2pm and will leave all my work in the studio too!” he directs at me as I go to open my mouth. He knows me well already, as I was literally about to say to him to make sure he comes home in time before he has to leave for home so he isn’t rushing. “Bye!” he adds, putting his bag over his shoulder

“See ya Hongjoong.” Seonghwa yawns, waving at him. “Were you telling him off for overworking before I woke up?” he asks me when the bedroom door closes

“Why do you think that?” I ask, turning my body to face him.

“He looked scared when he said he would be back at 2pm.” he laughs as do I

“Am I that scary?” I ask.

“Put it this way, I’ve never seen him look like that in all the years I’ve known him. Well, only when we were trainees and with management sometimes.”

“I don’t want to be scary!” I pout playfully, putting on my innocent eyes. Seonghwa suddenly grabs my hips and pulls me down into a lying position, eliciting a tiny yelp in surprise to escape me, then a laugh as his body hovers over mine.

“You don’t scare me.” He smirks, leaning down to kiss me.

“No!! I have morning breath!” I giggle covering my mouth before our lips could connect.

“So do I! I don’t care,” he says, removing my hand and placing his lips on mine. “Now, if you don’t mind, I am very hungry.”

“Want me to make you pancakes for breakfast?” I ask as he kisses my neck.

“Not the hunger I am talking about!” He smirks before moving lower

“Seonghwa!!” I gasp in shock as his hands pull my pj bottoms and underwear off on one swift yet smooth movement. His head disappears under the covers, as I can only laugh at his actions. My giggles soon stop, replaced by a small moan, as he doesn’t waste any time getting to work. “Oh god…” I moan again, my head falling back onto the pillow behind me. “Seonghwa!” and I hope to god that everyone else is still asleep!

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

After Seonghwa gave me 2 orgasms with his tongue alone, we finally got out of bed and I made him the pancakes I had offered earlier. Thankfully, everyone was still asleep, or at least still in their bedrooms, so I hoped that none of them heard me as I was struggling to keep quiet. Completely forgetting that Wooyoung and Yeosang were in the room beside us and Jongho was down the corridor. So yeah, hoping hard they were fast asleep!

After breakfast, I went for a shower in my room and started getting ready for my afternoon date with Yeosang. Every time I think of it, my stomach flips. I am very intrigued by where he was taking me, but I also was looking forward to spending some time alone with him. The other night on the sofa was the longest we’d spent, but also going to sleep with him cuddling me and waking up to him wrapped around my body was nice.

I look into my full-length mirror as I put my earrings in. Outside my room door, I can hear people talking and laughing. I hear a small knock at my door as I put the other earring in. I say to come in, looking at the door through my mirror to see who it is. I smile as I see Wooyoung head pop in.

He looks so cute with his hair in its naturally wavy state, with some of it pulled back into a small ponytail. I love it that way, but I’ll tell none of them how weak in the knees those ponytails make me when they wear them. Last week Hongjoong wore one for a performance and I swear I needed a cold shower at that moment. If Wooyoung knew how they made me feel, I know it would be a massive source of teasing from him and the man teases me enough daily!

At home, it is not unusual to see them with their long hair tied back, especially when they’ve been at the gym or just got home from practice! Seeing them with wavy and curly hair as well makes me feel less self conscious of my own naturally curly hair too.

“You look beautiful!” He says coming into the room and closing the door.

“You aren’t just saying that?” I ask, giving myself a final look in the mirror smoothing my skirt down before turning to face him.

“Absolutely not! Yeosang is a very lucky man.” He smiles, his head tilting slightly to the side. “I’ve never seen you wear a skirt either! I like it… a lot!” His smile turns into a cheeky grin as he wiggles his eyebrows playfully.

“He said it was casual, but cute and as you already know that to me, casual is hoodies, baggy jeans, oversized T-shirts, sweats. Basically tomboy to the max!” I laugh softly as he chuckles, sitting on the chair at my desk. Yunho had given me his spare gaming chair to use while Hongjoong looked for one I wanted. “So I hope this is ok,” I add, looking down at my outfit of a blue knitted vest top over a white T-shirt with a black skirt and black knee-high socks.

I place my hands on my hips and let out a small sigh, as I am really unsure. I hate how I am second guessing what I wear on dates with them. I’ve never done it before. I have always had the attitude that if my date does not like how I dress, then it is their problem. It isn’t anything the guys are doing either to make me feel this way. They always tell me how they like my style, that I look good in my clothes etc but I am putting pressure on myself to look good when I am out with them.

“Come here.” I hear Wooyoung say softly as he pulls me down to sit on his lap, his arms moving around my waist and placing a kiss on my shoulder. “Your outfit is perfect. You are perfect.”

“I am far from perfect!” I laugh lightly, one of my arms automatically wrapping around his shoulders while the other rests on top of his arms around my waist.

“You are pretty damn perfect to me!” he chuckles. “You are so small and cute, like a little doll! I just want to put you in my pocket and carry you around!”

“Small? We are nearly the same height!” I giggle

“Shush!” He pouts. “I am taller! You are my little doll!” I feel his arms tighten slightly as he playfully sways the chair from side to side. I lean forward to kiss his cheek, my lips connecting with the soft skin of his cheek and as I pull back, his head moves quickly forward to capture my lips. I kiss him back, my fingers holding onto the fabric of his hoodie around the back of his neck. The kiss deepens quickly and his breathing changes rapidly, just like the day before.

One of his hands moves from my waist down to my bare thigh and he squeezes the soft flesh before the same hand slips under my top. I feel his palm connect with my stomach and a little involuntary moan escapes my mouth. “Sorry.” He says, suddenly pulling away from me.

“Why?” I ask, feeling confused at the sudden gap between us as he covers his mouth with his hand. “Did I do something wrong?”

“No!” He says looking back at me, his eyes widen. The hand on his mouth moves to the back of his head and I can see he looks genuinely conflicted. “No Luna, you did nothing wrong. It was me! I shouldn’t have even kissed you.”

“What do you mean?” I ask as his hands move to my hips and lifts me off of him. I stumble slightly at suddenly being moved to my feet as he pushes himself off the seat. “Why shouldn’t you have kissed me?”

“I crossed a line and I am sorry,” he says, not looking at me. “I let myself get carried away and I shouldn’t have!”

“Wait!” I say loudly as he turns away from me and makes his way quickly to my bedroom door. However, I am quicker than him and make it to the door before he does. I stand in front of it to stop him from leaving. “What line?”

“Luna, I should go!” he says, his eyes looking anywhere but at me. “Today is Yeosangs day.”

“Wooyoung, look at me!” I say firmly, my eyebrows lower. His eyes reluctantly look into mine and I can see guilt in them. “What do you mean by ‘Yeosangs day’? and why are you saying you shouldn’t have kissed me?” I question.

“I shouldn’t have kissed you at all today because today is your day with Yeosang and his with you,” he replies

“And that means you can’t kiss me?” I ask as he nods his head slowly. I huff a little at this because I don’t understand it. “One rule between us all is no time sharing. Surely that means that just because I am going on a date with one of you doesn’t mean that I cannot be affectionate with someone else.”

“I just don’t want you to think that I am not being respectful to your relationship with the other guys,” he says softly

This causes me to pull him into my arms. I wrap my arms around his shoulders and hold him as close to me as I can get. “I would never.” I whisper into his ear as I rest my head on his shoulder and my hands stroke his hair. “Woo, I love your kisses and your cuddles. I love when you are affectionate with me and I don’t want you to hold back with me if you don’t want to.” I lift my head to look at him. “I respect your feelings about this though and while I completely love that you are respectful towards my relationship with the others, I am also in a relationship with you, too. You are my boyfriend as well!” His eyes look into mine and I can see how conflicted he is. “Wooyoung, are you ok with our situation? Me being with the others and you?” I find myself asking.

“No!” he replies quickly, his eyes going wide. “I mean yes, I am ok!” he adds even quicker. “I m-meant no, that I-I am ok with you being with the others a-and myself.”

I can’t help to let out a small laugh at how flustered he is. I have never ever seen this side of him and I admit it; I like it because it is very rare he gets this way, but I am also not wanting him to feel this way either.

“I am just hyper aware of your relationships with the other guys and I don’t want to step on anyone’s toes or cause any form of disrespect,” he says calmly

“Wooyoung, I don’t think you could ever be disrespectful to me or anyone. Please don’t think that way!” I say, one of my hands moving to his cheek. “If you really don’t want to kiss me or be affectionate on days I have dates with the others, then I will respect your wishes, but I never expect you to hold back.”

Although we had sat down at the beginning of this and had a talk about basic rules and things I don’t want, it was never official and, to be perfectly honest, we were all still in an awkward place. Now it has been a few weeks, things are settling down and we are all getting comfortable around one another. Admittedly, Jongho is still a bit on the shy and awkward side in one-on-one situations with me. However, he is slowly getting used to being alone with me and I am happy that he is, so I am not forcing anything.

Nevertheless, I think we need to have another conversation. A more in-depth conversation about how people are feeling, especially on date days, as I don’t want to have any of them feel uneasy. I make a mental note to speak to Hongjoong about this when he comes back from his parents to arrange this. Wooyoungs lips capturing mine interrupt my thoughts. I automatically kiss him back as he pushes me against the back of my bedroom door, my head hitting off the peg my night gown hangs on.

“I am so sorry!” he says

“It’s fine!” I laugh.

“I made you hit the back of your head, though!” His hand rubs the area I hit. “Are you okay?” he tries to look at it but I pull his hand away

“I am fine! I have a very tough head!” I reply, kissing the back of his hand. “It’s like steel, so don’t worry!” I put his hand back on my waist where it had been before. “Now where were we?” I grin. I lean upward to capture his lips once more.

After a few hesitant kisses from him, he relaxes and we pick up right where we left off before my head bumped into the peg. I feel his hands move down to my ass, giving it a squeeze before pulling my body closer to his. Before I know it, he has lifted me up. My legs instinctively wrap around him as he pushes my body against the door again. A small whimper comes from my throat and my body stiffens slightly at the sudden action, but I can feel how secure I am in his arms and pinned between his body and the door. I know he won’t let me fall, so my body relaxes once more and I continue to kiss him.

“You drive me insane, jagiya.” He groans as his lips move from mine to my jawline and down to my neck. “You do not know how much.” His teeth skim the skin of my neck before he pulls his head back to look at me. His hair is now a mess from my hands, his lips red and swollen with a hint of my lipstick on them and his face flushed pink. He leans forward and gives me the sweetest kiss I’ve ever experienced. A stark contrast to the kisses seconds before, but I am not complaining. “I really need to stop now.” He whispers to me, his eyes gazing deeply into mine.

He is right; he needs to stop. We both do before we go too far. I nod and kiss his lips lightly. I feel his arms surround my waist, and I hold on to his shoulder securely as I unwrap my legs from his hips. He holds me steady as I put my feet back on the ground. I go to move away, but he leans down and kisses me sweetly again. “I need to go pack.” he says

“Are you seriously not packed? You leave in like 20 minutes!” I laugh.

“Hey, I am not Mr Organised like a certain person who lives in this house, but I am a fast packer and I always have everything I need. Rarely do I have to buy things on the other end,” he replies, laughing too as he kisses my forehead.

His arms let go of me and takes one step backwards to give me space. I reach over to wipe the remnants of my lipstick off his lips with my thumb as he smiles at me. I can’t help but smile back because his smile is infectious. It also makes my tummy flip when he does it to me. We could be in a crowded room, but when he smiles at me, it feels like we are the only two people in that space.

“When you come back, can you and I spend some time together? Just the two of us?” I ask him as I fix his messy hair.

“You don’t even need to ask that! Of course we can. I want you all to myself again!” he says, leaning across to place a little kiss on my lips. I go over to the mirror to check my hair and makeup and I find it still intact. Other than needing a bit of a top-up of lipstick, my makeup is untouched despite the heated kisses. “Before I forget, the main reason I came in here was San was asking for you to go to his room so he could say goodbye before his dad arrives to pick him up and Seonghwa.”

“Wait, Sans dad is picking them up?!” My head snaps back to him as he nods, “Fuck! I thought it was a manager!” I feel a bubble in my tummy knowing that Sans dad absolutely cannot see me.

“No, Sans dad always comes to pick him up when we get time off. Seonghwas hometown is on the way, so he always takes him as well. He would drive each of us home if he could!” Wooyoung laughs

“That is… actually really sweet he does that.” I smile as he opens my bedroom door.

“He is. Sans dad is like all our dads now. He is so nice. He texts us all regularly to see how we are and calls us as well. It’s easy to see where San gets his kindness and compassion from.”

In the lounge Mingi, Jongho and Seonghwa are playing a game on the ps5. Seonghwas bags are at the doorway to the hall so I can see he is ready to leave. All three are shouting and laughing at the tv screen. Wooyoung and I walk behind the sofa and I can’t resist touching Seonghwas head as we walk past. He turns his head to see who touched him, then smiles widely as he sees it was me. Jongho laughs even louder, causing his head to quickly look back at the screen to see Mingi has scored a goal against Seonghwas team. I hear Wooyoung chuckle and hold on to my hand as we make our way upstairs. When we get to the second floor, he gives me another kiss. “Enjoy your date with Yeosang and seeing your family, too. Make sure you rest as well!”

“I will as long as you do too when you go home!” I reply.

“Not a chance with Kyungmin around!” he laughs. “I don’t mind it, though. It is never a dull moment with him. I imagine your sisters are the same?”

“Oh yeah! Double the trouble as well!” I laugh too. “Now go pack! I’ll see you on Friday.”

“See ya!” he smiles, patting my head before going up the stairs to his own room. I turn and make my way to Sans. His door is already open, so I knock and pop my head in. San is zipping his suitcase.

“Hey sunshine!” he smiles, tilting his head to motion me into his room.

“Wooyoung said you wanted to see me.” I say, walking fully into the room as he lifts his case from the bed and sits it upright on the floor.

“Yeah, I wanted to say goodbye in private. Didn’t want to do it in front of the others because I’ll end up getting teased for it,” he replies.

“You don’t need to explain.” I smile at him as he comes over to me. He holds me close to him, taking a deep breath as if he is inhaling as much of my scent as possible.

“I am going to miss you,” he sighs, burying his face in my neck. “A lot.”

“You’ll be back in a couple of days, so just enjoy the time with your family and being at home.” I reply, stroking the back of his head. “But I’ll miss you too.” I whisper into his ear, causing him to chuckle lightly and his arms to tighten ever so slightly.

“When I come back, we will continue The Sound of Magic, so don’t watch any of it while I am gone!” he laughs

“As if I would!” I laugh back. “It is our little thing.”

“I like the fact you and I have a thing that’s just ours.” he smiles at me. “I can be a little bit selfish sometimes with you.”

“What do you mean?” I ask.

“I don’t mind sharing you with the others or spending time with you and everyone else at the same time. However, there are times I just want to keep you to myself and I love when we do.”

“I love it as well.” I say, looking up at him as his hand moves to my face, gently cupping my cheek. He tilts my head as he kisses me. I smile as I kiss him back. It is a soft and sweet kiss. Slow and controlled.

“Sorry to interrupt you two,” Seonghwa voice says softly, “but your dad is in the garage. He’ll be here in a few minutes.”

“It is ok hyung. Thanks for letting us know.” San says, pulling back from me.

“I’ll see you on Thursday, Luna.” Seonghwa smiles at me. We had already said our goodbyes after breakfast, but it was nice to see him again before he actually leaves.

“Bye.” I smile back at him before he leaves the room

“I don’t like this, leaving you. It just doesn’t feel right.” he sighs, his eyes looking into mine and they look so sad. I’ve never him look this way and I don’t like it.

“Hey honey, don’t think that way!” I say, touching his face. “You aren’t leaving me, and I am not going to be alone. I have Yeosang, Mingi and Jongho. I’ll be seeing my friends too and my family. However, if you want to talk, then just text me! Anytime of the day or night. I don’t care, I’ll message you back as soon as I see it. And you know me, my phone is usually in my hand!” I giggle.

“That is true!” he laughs, and it’s nice to hear him perking up again. From downstairs, we hear a lot of voices causing us both to look towards the partially closed door. “I guess that means my dad is here.”

“Go, I’ll stay up here until you are gone, so he doesn’t see me.” I say.

“I am sorry,” he says. “I want to introduce you so much, but I know I’ll end up calling you my girlfriend and Hongjoong has told us parents aren’t to know about you yet. Even if I didn’t say that, my dad would just ask questions about you on the drive home and he’d figure it out!”

“You do not need to explain at all! I completely understand. My mom is the same!” I smile, kissing his lips to reassure him. “Now go!”

“One more kiss!” he playfully pouts, bending down to be eye level with me and capturing my lips. It catches me off guard and causes me to laugh, but I kiss him back. This one is more intense. Not in a heated, sexual way though, more in an extension of his emotions way. “I better go before he comes up to my room.” He says as I nod. “I’ve taken the password off my computer. If you want to play any games on it with your friends, then you can use it. No arguments either! I don’t want you going to the internet cafes alone, especially at night!”

He definitely knows me well as that is exactly what I was planning the following day!

“I wasn’t even going to argue with you! It is pointless even trying.” I laugh. “Thank you for trusting me with your computer, though. Now, go!” I say, gently pushing him away from me to get him to move.

“Ok, I’ll text you when I arrive in Namhae. Enjoy your date with Yeosang this afternoon too,” he says, picking up his backpack and pulling his suitcase towards the door. “Bye!” he blows me a kiss before he disappears out the room.

I keep the smile on my face until I hear him go down the stairs and sit on his bed, sighing. I didn’t like this either. It was only a couple of days! I didn’t know why I was feeling this way about them going home. I hear San shout “Appa!” as he gets to the lounge, and it makes the smile return to my face again because I can hear the genuine excitement in his voice at seeing his dad.

As soon as I hear the apartment door close and it go quiet, I leave Sans bedroom. I make my way down the corridor towards the stairs, being quiet just in case they come back in. I lean over the bannister, trying to hear for any signs of life downstairs when a voice from above makes me jump. “What are you doing?” I look up to see Jongho looking down at me over the bannister on the 3rd floor. A massive smile appearing on his face.

“You scared me!” I whisper.

“Sorry. Why are we whispering?” he whispers back.

“I want to make sure that Seonghwa, San and his dad have definitely left before I go downstairs.” I answer, looking down at the 1st floor again.

“Ah right.” He says as I hear his footsteps on the stairs. “You know you can still go down there.” he slides beside me, looking down as well.

“What if one of them forgot something and they come back and Sans dad sees me, though?” I mumble, biting my lower lip.

“We just say you are giving me an English lesson! You don’t have to skulk in the shadows like this,” he replies, making me look at him. “Come on!” he pushes off the bannister and grabs my hand. I am so shocked by the sudden action that I don’t resist as he pulls me down the stairs with him. “I am on dish duty today and Hongjoong is already coming home from the studio. If they aren’t done when he gets back, I’ll get scolded.” He keeps a hold of my hand as we walk down the corridor towards the kitchen.

“I can help you with them.” I offer.

“Oh, hell no! This is my job to do, plus you are going on your date soon. But you could always supervise me?” he grins at me. “Make sure I am doing it correctly.” His eyebrows wiggle playfully, causing me to laugh and nod as he navigates me into the kitchen. Still holding my hand, he takes me over to one of the bar stools at the kitchen island and makes me sit down. “You can boss me from here,” he says, letting go of my hand and pulling the sleeves of his shirt up.

There weren’t many dishes to be washed, just a couple of plates, some cutlery and 2 mugs, so it didn’t take him long as we chatted comfortably during it. Like we do when the others are around, except it was just the two of us. It felt like a very good step in the right direction for us.

“Are you seeing your parents tomorrow?” he asks, sitting beside me after he has put the last dry dish into the cupboard

“No, their flight arrives pretty late and they’ll be going straight to their apartment rental. It is a direct flight to Seoul from London so there are no change overs. The girls will be tired from the flight. It usually really tires them out and all 4 of them just crash out when they get to the apartment.” I answer

“It is a long flight from London.” he nods

“I’ll see them on Wednesday though, as we are going to have lunch with my uncle and his family.” I answer.

“Big family reunion! Sounds nice.” he smiles.

“It will be chaotic and noisy… but really nice.” I smile back.

“Do you normally speak English with your family?” he asks

“Mostly. My parents speak mostly Korean when they visit though, but the twins aren’t as fluent as my parents and I are. So we speak a mixture of both for them when they come.”

“They are still young,” he says, “And Korean is a hard language to learn if you weren’t born here. Even I still get things mixed up! I am sorry to ask you this, but are their names Soojin and Hyejin?” he asks hesitantly. “I don’t want you to think I don’t listen to you, but you only said their names once on the first night you arrived here.”

“Don’t apologise! That was a while ago I said that. Yes, Hyejin is the older twin, while Soojin is the younger one. They are fully identical too.” I answer, pulling out my phone to show him a photo of them. He moves closer to me and I can feel his body heat as our shoulders touch.

“Wow, they really are! They look like you as well!” he says, staring at the screen and smiling.

“People say that, but I can’t see it. I think they look more like my dad. Soojin is getting good at her Korean now. My dad says she is a mini me with her learning, while Hyejin is just a free spirit.” I laugh. “No one can tell her what to do. If she doesn’t want to do it, she won’t.”

“Is Hyejin the troublemaker twin?” he asks as he rests his elbow on the counter in front of us and subtly moves closer

“Oh no, they are both little troublemakers. Never underestimate their innocent faces! They are usually plotting something.” I say, “However, Hyejin is usually the one who thinks of the idea, while Soojin creates the perfect execution of said idea!” Jongho laughs loudly at this, causing me to laugh too. It is the first time I’ve made him laugh like this.

“They sound so funny!” he says, his eyes staring into mine in a way that makes my heart skip a beat. I feel one of his hands touch mine as his gaze briefly drops to my lips, then moves straight back to my eyes again, and he leans his head towards mine. I can feel his breath on my lips as they are just about to touch.

Suddenly the chime of the front door opening causes him to pull back quickly and stand up from his bar stool. He clears his throat and looks nervous as I sit upright. I feel like we have just been caught doing something we shouldn’t have. Hongjoong comes around the corner and smiles at us. “Ah Luna, you are still here. I was hoping to see you before I left.”

“I was just doing the dishes.” Jongho says rather loudly, causing both Hongjoong and I to look at him. His face is covered in guilt and I know he is feeling awkward over the little moment we just had. “I am going upstairs now,” he adds before leaving the room quickly without another word.

“Something wrong?” Hongjoong asks me as I stare at the doorway Jongho has just disappeared from.

“Not at all.” I shake my head, but inside I feel a little frustrated. This is the second time we’ve shared a moment that another member has unwittingly interrupted. “You wanted to see me?” I ask, looking back at him.

“Yeah, I just wanted to check if you’ll be okay while I am gone.” He says, “I know it is only for a couple of days and this is me fussing again which you hate, but I know I won’t relax if I don’t check first.”

“I’ll be fine!” I smile. “You don’t have to worry about me.”

“I know I don’t, but I can’t help it. I know it has only been a matter of weeks since you came into our lives, but I feel rather protective of you. I think we all feel that way.”

“I understand.” I nod. “I feel the same way about all of you. Which is why I am happy you are all finally getting to rest and see your families! So honestly, no need to worry about me at all!”

“Good! I should go double check my bags.” he smiles. “I’ll see you when I come back on Friday.” He leans down and kisses my cheek before leaving the room and run up the stairs to his bedroom.

I hear the doorbell chime, causing me to turn my head towards the doorway. Usually if someone comes to the apartment, they ring the video camera at the building entrance, but it didn’t go off. The only people who visit the apartment are the managers, and they usually just come in, so it is very unusual for the doorbell to go off. I hear someone jogging down the corridor and see Mingi go past the large doorway between the kitchen and the hallway. I hear the door opening and a soft chuckle coming from Mingi and some shuffling before the door closes.

“Luna, someone is at the door for you.” Mingi grins widely, coming into the kitchen.

No one knows I even live here! Who would be at the apartment to see me? I stand up from the bar stool, feeling really confused as Mingi just grins at me.

“Who is it?” I ask, feeling my chest tighten a bit. I can feel my nerves rising a bit at who it is.

“Just come here.” He tilts his head towards the direction of the front door.

Reluctantly, I move towards the doorway, but I stay close to Mingi as we go into the hallway. Instantly my chest loosens as I see Yeosang standing infront of the closed front door, holding a stunning bouquet full of pastel coloured flowers.

“I am here to pick you up for our date.” he smiles

“Smooth man!” I hear Mingi smile under his breath before he leaves us alone.

“What are you doing?” I break into a laugh and move towards him.

“I want it to be like a real date.” he says, kissing my cheek

He hands the bouquet to me and I smile even more, tilting my head to smell them. They are absolutely beautiful. “It is a real date!” I say, looking up at him.

“I mean, like if we were going on a first date in a traditional manner.” he replies

“What would a traditional first date with you be like?” I smell the flowers once more before I look back at him.

“I would pick you up from your home with flowers. I would drive us to our date, but today we have Myeonjin driving us.” he says, his hand delicately cupping my cheek. “Just because we live together doesn’t mean that I won’t be traditional and do things the way I would if we didn’t live together.”

I can feel my heart swell a little at this. It is so romantic.

“It is cheesy I know,” he mumbles, looking away, but I can see a red blush appear over his cheeks. I place the flower on the little bench at the door and put my hands on his face and gently move it back to look at me.

“It is not cheesy. Not in the slightest. I love it!” I whisper. “Does a traditional first date allow for a kiss right now?”

“Normally I would leave a kiss until the end of the date but we’ve already kissed… a lot!” he chuckles lightly, “So I say yes.”

I break into a grin as he leans down, but then stops just as our lips are about to connect.

“Just so you know Luna..” His lips ghost mine “…you may kiss me whenever you want...” My stomach flips as I feel his breath on my mouth and his brown eyes staring into mine. “…I don’t care if the other guys are there.” My heart literally skips a beat at his words and the way he is looking into my eyes. There is a hint of something in them, something nice, calming, and reassuring.

“Are you sure?” I ask him.

“I don’t want you to hold back and I don’t want to either anymore.” After what feels like an eternity, his lips brush against mine and I close my eyes, melting into the kiss. One hand on my waist as the hand on my cheek moves to the side of my neck. The affirmation of his words that I can openly show him affection now and no longer hold back makes my heart skip a beat.

“You look beautiful.” He smiles, resting his forehead on mine. “I love your outfit!”

“Is it casual yet cute worthy?” I ask.

“Very!” he chuckles, oh how his cute little laugh makes me smile. “And just so you know, you are always cute even in your pjs, glasses on, no makeup and your hair in a giant bun,” he whispers, “as you lounge on the sofa, wrapped up in your kuromi blanket, eating your little bowl of strawberries and watch your kdramas.”

“oh my god!” I laugh at the very idea of that image in my head even looking remotely cute.

“Are you ready to go?” he asks, pulling back from me, but keeping his hands on my waist.

“I just need to get my bag from my room and I am ready.” I reply.

“You go get your bag and I’ll put your flowers in the kitchen.” he smiles

I quickly make my way to my room, I grab my bag from the back of the door handle and check I have my usual essentials. Purse, brush, perfume, tinted lip balm, phone and epi-pen. I pull out the epi-pen to give it a once over. Something I have done for years. It is always good to make sure it is still in working order and not expired either, as a health care worker scared me with a story over someone’s failing when they needed it. Now whether that was true, I don’t know, but it definitely gave me the scare to always check them every week. I give myself a final look in the mirror, fixing the parting in my bangs, take a deep breath and say quietly, “You got this, no need to be nervous.” and leave my room.

Yeosang is already in the hallway again, waiting for me with a smile on his face. It is only now that I notice his own outfit. He dressed all in black and looks effortlessly stylish, like he always does. As usual, he helps me to put my shoes on. As we leave the apartment, I feel his hand slip into mine and holding it gently holds my hand as we make our way to the private garage underneath the building.

Myeonjin is already waiting by a black tinted SUVs. He goes to open the door as we approach, but Yeosang puts his hand up and gives a small shake of the head, opening the door himself and holding my hand as I get in. I smile as I do so before he closes the door and does a little jog around the other side to come in.

“So can I know where we are going now, or is it still a secret?” I ask as Myeonjin pulls out of the private garage.

“It is a little secluded cafe over in Gangnam.” Yeosang smiles

“And you said you’ve never been in?” I say.

“No, I’ve never had the time, but a couple of my friends have been and said it was good. I always knew it was somewhere I wanted to go with someone special,” he says, holding my hand. “And as much as I like our managers, I do not class them as someone special,” he whispers, glancing at Myeonjin in the drivers seat, who is bobbing his head to the song on the radio, completely unaware that Yeosang just called him someone not special. I can’t help but giggle at this and interlock our fingers. “Well, to me anyway,” he adds on laughing too.

“Well, I am very excited to see this cafe and even more to spend some time with you as well.” I reply.

“So am I.” he smiles, his free hand moving a part of my long bangs off my face.

As Myeonjin drives through the streets of Seoul, making his way over the Han River towards Gangnam, Yeosang and I talk between ourselves. The conversation flows so easily between us now, so much different from a couple of weeks ago when he could barely look me in the eye for longer than 30 seconds. Now he is holding eye contact, initiating physical contact, and it feels like he is fully relaxed.

“We will be there in 2 minutes.” Myeonjin says from the front seat, and Yeosang squeezes my hand before letting it go. He has held it the entire car ride from the apartment to Gangnam. He pulls out a hat from the pocket in front of his seat and puts it on. He passes me a black mask before putting one on, too.

“It is just procedure,” he says. “We can take them off when we get into the cafe.”

“Oh, I know.” I nod, taking the mask from him and putting it on as well. “It is broad daylight and you need to stay as anonymous as possible in a public place.”

“Sorry.” he says pulling my hand into his once more

“No apologising, I get it.” I smile. “I want to help protect you all too and to keep you safe, so I’ll do whatever I need to.”

“We all must have done something great in our past lives to deserve someone as amazing and understanding as you.” He replies, squeezing my hand. “We are very lucky.”

I am the lucky one, to be surrounded by these wonderful men who just want me to be happy. I am about to say this when the car slows down to a stop. Myeonjin gets out of the car first and speaks to a man dressed in black standing in a small alleyway. Out of context, it looks like some dodgy deal is happening, but I recognise the man as one of the security for the band. They are both nodding and Myeonjin looks over and gives Yeosang a hand signal.

“Stay here.” Yeosang smiles at me before letting go of my hand and getting out of the car. I wonder what’s going on, thinking the hand signal meant something was wrong until Yeosang goes to the other side and opens my door. He puts his hand out for me to hold and I feel myself smile again. “Lets go in.”

He really is being a gentleman on this date. It isn’t something I’ve ever experienced. My previous partners weren’t bad or horrible, it just wasn’t something they did. The way all 8 of them treat me, opening doors for me, checking that I’ve eaten, drank enough water, making sure nothing in my environment affects my allergies, even making sure there is always a supply of fresh strawberries in the apartment and at work for me.

Yeosang continues to hold my hand as we walk towards Myeonjin and the security guard, who, from what I can remember, is called Sohyun. “Everything is sorted inside,” the security guard says to Yeosang, walking ahead of us. The path is narrow and lined with lots of green foliage and mixed flowers. At the end of the stone path, I can see the cafe. It is very hidden and secluded and I wonder how Yeosang even discovered it when it is so hidden between the buildings and the nature.

“What does he mean ‘everything is sorted inside’?” I ask Yeosang quietly as we approach the door.

“We have the cafe to ourselves for a few hours. I wanted to make sure we could enjoy ourselves without fear of someone recognising me or taking photos. So Myeonjin hired out the cafe and Sohyun scoped out the place too, to make sure there aren’t any hidden cameras,” he replies, as my eyes go wide. “Don’t worry! This is all very normal when we go places like this.”

Sohyun opens the door for us as we walk in, and I see it is empty. Apart from 2 staff members are the counter who are busy working. “On dates, you mean?” I ask as Yeosang takes me over to a table by a large bay window that looks out into a small courtyard filled with plants and even some wildlife and pulls the seat out for me.

“Anywhere public that we just want to have privacy at,” he answers, sitting across from me. He takes his hat and face mask off as I do the same. “If the place is small enough, the company can sometimes hire the entire place, so it is only us or we can go into private areas in larger places.”

“That makes sense.” I nod, putting my bag on the empty seat beside me. “I can understand that. It is things that us normal people take for granted. Just being about to go out for a meal with friends without worrying.”

“But to answer your question - yes, dates too,” he says quietly. “Between our hectic trainee days, debuting, then our work schedules, we didn’t really have time for dates, though.”

“But you still got to go on dates, though?” I ask. “From what I understand, you guys didn’t have a dating ban.”

“We only had a ban during the trainee years, but we all found a way around it without the company, or Hongjoong finding out!” he laughs. I’ll bet! I can’t help but laugh as well at the thought of them going on sneaky dates behind Hongjoongs back while also reminding me when I used to sneak out the house to hang out with boys when I was a teenager. “I hope this is ok. I preordered an afternoon tea, but you can order anything you want from the menu!” he says.

“oh my gosh! I love afternoon teas!!” I gasp.

“Oh, that’s good!” he sighs lightly, smiling, and his face looks relieved. “I was so worried you would hate them and I had made a mistake.”

The 2 staff members bring over 3 tier trays filled with finger sandwiches, cakes, sweet treats, fruit. Everything you could imagine and it all looks so delicious! “Oh, wow!” I say once they have left. “Afternoon teas always remind me of my mom. She would take me to one or make one at home.” I smile as Yeosang pours some tea from a china teapot and moves the cup to me.

“Are you settling into the apartment okay?” he asks, opening a napkin

“I am. I won’t lie. It felt rather strange at first, especially after living alone for so long. I was, and still am, very aware that it is your home. The only place away from cameras that the 8 of you can be yourselves, and I didn’t want to impose on that place of privacy for you all.” I answer as he hands me a plate.

“It is your home as well now. A place that you can be yourself too,” he says.

“I know, and you’ve all made me feel so welcome. It is why I am feeling more at ease in the apartment now.” I say. “I enjoy living with you all. I didn’t realise how lonely I felt living alone before and how much I missed people! The dorms I lived in for uni were such a social place, a lot of fun times.”

“I found it hard living in dorms when I first moved to Seoul. It is hardly a secret that I am not the most social person. I was even more quiet when I was younger,” he says as I nod to let him know he has my full attention. “Too used to living with just my parents and sister to being a dorm in a new city with lots of people I didn’t know. I was on the verge of giving up and just going back home.”

“What made you stay?” I ask.

“Wooyoung!” he chuckles. “Things got easier when we became friends. I didn’t feel as lost or alone. He looked out for me and helped me get to know the other trainees. It was a hard decision to leave the company I was with to go to KQ and a massive risk too, but when Wooyoung followed me, risking his own career to be with me, it showed me what true friendship was.”

Hearing Yeosang speak to openly about life as a trainee, his friendship with Wooyoung and his move to KQ makes my heart warm. He is a very private person, I’ve known that before I even accepted the job and I know it isn’t easy for him to be so open with his feelings but here he is, telling me such ease as we spend the next 3 hours just enjoy the food and drinks, and talking easily to one another.

When it is time to leave, Yeosang asks me if there are any cakes I want to take home for later on. “We should get something for Mingi and Jongho too. I know Jongho doesn’t like sweet foods, but I am sure there is something he’d like.” I suggest as Yeosang nods. We go over to the counter and pick a selection of treats. I take out my purse to pay for them, but Yeosang waves his hand at me. “This was my idea to get a selection of treats, so let me pay for it!” I protest as he pulls his card out of his wallet.

“Absolutely not! This is still a part of the date, so I’ll pay!” he says, handing the card over.

“Fine!” I sigh, putting my purse back in my bag. “However, I will pay next time!”

Yeosang nods, but I can tell it is a ‘yeah ok then, just try it!’ nod rather than a ‘of course you can pay next time’ nod. Yeosang puts his hat back on and we put our face masks on, then head back to the car. It is raining lightly now, so we walk quickly since neither of us has coats on as Sohyun opens the car door. Yeosang lets me get in first and I shuffle along to the other seat to let him in. Myeonjin is already in the drivers seat and it isn’t long before we are pulling into the private garage.

As we walk into the apartment, it feels so quiet. Knowing over half the guys were now gone felt bizarre. I am thankful that Yeosang, Mingi and Jongho were staying. It would have felt weird being completely alone in the apartment.

“Thank you for the date.” I say to Yeosang. “I had a really good time with you.”

“I am glad. Thank you for accepting the date.” He smiles.

“So it’s the end of the date. How does traditional date Yeosang handle this part?” I grin at him.

“I would make sure you have arrived safely at your home.” He says, pulling me towards him. “If it felt right, I would ask for a second date.”

“And are you going to?” I ask.

“Do you want me to?” he teases, his hands move from my waist down to my butt, holding me closer to his body

“Yeosang!” I whine, pouting as he chuckles

“I’d take you on a thousand dates if I could!” he whispers, kissing me.

In an instant, he has me trapped between the wall and his body as his kisses deepen. Being in this position with him in the alcove at the front door to the apartment is becoming a very regular thing now.

I can feel him getting turned on as we kiss and I would be lying if I said I wasn’t feeling the same way. A small moan escapes him before he pulls his lips away, panting as he tries to regain his breathing.

“Are you ok?” I ask, moving a hand to his face as I feel his entire body shake lightly.

“Luna, I don’t want to make you think I don’t want to continue, because I do. I really do!” he sighs, lightly resting his forehead against mine. “I just… I’m… Sorry!”

“It is ok! Don’t apologise!” I kiss him lightly. “If you want to take things slowly, we will.”

“It isn’t about taking it slowly. I don’t want anything to happen that could ruin the night or make you regret anything. It has been such a perfect day with you and I am just worried.”

I feel a small pain in my chest at hearing him say he is worried and honestly, there is nothing I could do with him I would regret, but he needs to be 100% happy too.

“Then let’s have a relaxing night. No pressure, no expectations and definitely no worrying!” I say. “I don’t want you to feel that way, not with me. Ok?” he nods in reply.

His arms suddenly envelope around my body, tucking me into his. I smile as I rest my head on his collarbones. “Thank you,” he says, kissing the top of my head. We stay like this for who knows how long, both of us just enjoying the moment together, in one another’s arms.

“Oh, I didn’t know you two were back home.” Jonghos voice comes from the other end of the hall at the doorway of the utility room.

“We just got back a few minutes ago.” Yeosang says.

“Mingi and I were just about to have a movie night, if you two want to join us?” Jongho asks, “Unless you two already have plans!” he adds, his ears turning a shade of red and it is clear to see what he is meaning

“We don’t.” Yeosang smiles down at me. “Give us 10 minutes to get changed?”

“Perfect. I am making popcorn anyway and Mingi is down at the store getting some more snacks.” Jongho smiles before going into the kitchen. Yeosang gives me another kiss before we head to our bedrooms to get changed into our pjs.

20 minutes later, the 4 of us are on the sofa, the treats we got from the cafe and the snacks Mingi got laid out on the coffee table in front of us, giant bowls of freshly made popcorn, and trying to pick a movie. Yeosang shuffles behind me while Mingi is on our right scrolling the tv with Jongho stretches out on the other corner of the sofa.

“You guys pick whatever you want.” I say when Mingi asks me to pick.

“We can never decide, though.” Jongho laughs as I feel Yeosangs arms snake around my waist, pulling me to sit between his legs. “You need to be the deciding vote! What you say goes.”

“How about we do a blind pick? Close our eyes, Mingi scrolls on the remote, we count to 5 and whatever movie it stops on, we watch?” I suggest leaning into Yeosang, his chest pressed against my back and his legs on either side of my hips.

“Thats actually a good idea!” Mingi says as Jongho nods

As we all close our eyes, I feel Yeosang place a kiss on my cheek, causing me to smile and reach behind me to touch his face. “1, 2, 3, 4, 5!” Mingis voice shouts, causing us all to laugh and we open our eyes to see the highlighted movie is Frozen 2 prompting Mingi to sing Into the Unknown as Jongho covers his ears. I look back at Yeosang and to see him smiling down at me.

“Thank you,” he whispers into my ear

“For what?” I ask.

“Being you and accepting me… accepting us, and our insane lifestyle.” He replies.

I literally feel my heart skip a beat at his words as he leans forward to place a kiss on my lips and for the first time in a long time, I feel content and stable. Although only Hongjoong was aware of my bipolar so far, the others had accepted me and I knew I would need to tell them soon. As our lips part, I twist my body slightly to lie on my side, still secure in his arms so I can cuddle into him better. I look over at Mingi and Jongho as the movie begins, and I cannot help but smile. As much as I already miss the others, I feel so happy in this moment with the 3 of them, and incredibly lucky too.

[laurenairay]

Déjà-Brew – E. Pettersson

Here a little fic I wrote for @ryngrvs​ birthday celebrations!! I chose the bingo strip of: ‘unrequited love’, ‘handwritten notes’, ‘mutual pining’, ‘you make me better’, ‘golden retriever x black cat’.

I had a lot of fun writing this and creating all the little things that went into it, and I’m definitely indulging in the fantasies of my teenage barista self. And yes, I definitely fudged the Canucks schedule for November. I hope you enjoy this C! Happy birthday 💛

Summary: Elias Pettersson walked into a coffee shop one morning and met Joanna.

Word count: 8.2k

Warnings: light angst, fluff, pining

*

Elias was restless. He had a call scheduled with his agent first thing this Monday morning, 9am, but it was only 6am and he couldn’t sleep. It was ridiculous really, that on a rare day off training, his body woke up anyway, but here he was wide awake with no hope of slipping back into sleep. There was no point just lying there, staring up at the ceiling either. So with a sigh and a brief close of his eyes, he pushed himself upright, reluctantly kicking the warmth of the duvet away. A brief run outside would be productive at least, right? And he could definitely zone out enough to not have to wake up fully. It was better than lazing around and he could absolutely use it to humble-brag to his teammates later – perfect.

By the time he stepped outside into the brisk September air, Elias did regret trying to be proactive a little bit, but it was too late now. He’d committed to it, and it would make the trainers happy if nothing else. So he set off, music providing the perfect backdrop to drown out the sparse early morning commuter traffic, leaving him to lightly jog down the streets of his neighbourhood in an eerily empty bliss. He knew he didn’t spend enough time exploring his surrounding area, noting the cafes and bars and restaurants in passing that he didn’t recognise, all of them still dim in the grey morning light. Maybe he should do this more often – coming out and seeing the world while it was relatively empty, cementing his place in the city that he hoped to call his own for a long time to come.

He ran and he ran and he ran, losing himself in his thoughts until his watch beeped loudly, telling him he’d run a full 3 miles; 45 minutes had flown by, without evening realising it. Elias winced as he slowed down to a stop, realising he was a long way from his apartment now, and turned around with a quiet groan to start the journey back. The sun was starting to rise now, just around 7am, so he knew the world would start coming alive soon, something he was hoping to avoid. It wasn’t that he didn’t love the fans, especially the little kids who were always so happy to see him, but at this time in the morning it was the last thing he wanted to do, to make polite small talk when he was only thinking about coffee and breakfast.

Actually, coffee wasn’t a bad idea.

By the time he’d made it back to his neighbourhood, to the cafes and bars and restaurants he’d passed earlier, he noticed one little light on. A coffee shop – exactly what he needed. Déjà-Brew. Huh, a pun he didn’t automatically hate. That was something new. And it only 7.30am, so it was too early for anyone other than office commuters to be around, which was even better.

Elias found himself slowing down to a stop outside the shop, turning his music off and tugging out his headphones, noticing there were barely any customers. Perfect. He’d been hoping for, and expecting, the warmth that hit him like a wall as he opened the door, the familiar scent of freshly-ground coffee beans, the cosy armchairs and rickety tables, and the splashes of colour in the artwork across the walls.

What he wasn’t expecting was the beaming smile that greeted him the moment he walked through the door.

“Good morning Sunshine!”

That…that was a lot of pep.

“Um, hello?” he offered, a lot more hesitant that he expected.

The girl behind the counter just laughed, smile staying present, and tilted her head, copper hair shining in the bright lights of the store.

“What can I get for you, on this beautiful day?”

Still cheerful, still upbeat, still smiling. And as he walked up to the counter, he noticed exactly how beautiful that smile was, matching the person wearing it. That was a weird thought. But it was true, all the same.

“A large cappuccino?” he asked, saying the first thing that came to mind.

“Sure thing! What name, and is that to have in or take out?”

“Elias. Take out. I’ve got to get back to a meeting,” he admitted, a little sheepishly.

What had prompted him to say that? He didn’t even know this girl…and yet here he was, blurting out things that she didn’t need to know.

But she just giggled, nodding. “Rather you than me – thank you for stopping by our little store anyway!”

Elias found himself smiling softly as she scribbled down the order on the side of the cup, her good mood infectious, something which he was sure was one of the main reasons she was at the register this early in the morning. The girl passed the cup over to her colleague to start making the order, before ringing up his total.

“That’ll be $4,” she said, that pretty smile still in place.

He handed over a $10 bill. “Keep the change.”

It was the least he could do, right? To say thanks for putting him in such a good mood? Especially since it wasn’t always such an easy feat.

“Awesome, thank you! Your coffee will be ready soon, and you can pick it up just down the end there.”

He just nodded, earning another beaming smile back, leaving him a little stunned in the best way as he shuffled down the counter to wait. He watched as she immediately put the change in the large tip jar on the counter, humming happily to herself even as she whipped out a cloth and wiped over the surface on her side that didn’t need wiping. Endlessly optimistic, a positive energy he’d only seen from Brock on his good days, and he wondered how much of it was real. Even just thinking that, he knew he was at least a little wrong for doubting her positivity, because as far as she knew no-one was watching her, and there she was carrying it out – so it wasn’t for show. Who was this girl? What was her deal? What was it about her that made her occupy his thoughts like this?

“Large cappuccino for Elias?”

He tore his gaze away from the girl behind the counter, hoping there wasn’t a tell-tale blush on his pale cheeks, and stepped up to retrieve his coffee. But what he saw written on the side stopped him in his tracks. Other than his name and his coffee order, there was an extra message…just for him?

image description: handwritten note, have a wonderful day! with a drawn cartoon sun.

“Just so you know, Jojo really is that cheerful 100% of the time. It’s genuine.”

A deep voice startled him out of his thoughts, making Elias glance back up at the counter to see the male barista who’d made his drink looking at him in amusement.

“I’ll keep that in mind,” Elias murmured.

The barista just laughed, nodding his acknowledgement, before leaving Elias to glance down at the cup one last time. Jojo. A beautiful name to match a beautiful smile and beautiful face. Okay now he was just being ridiculous. What was it about this girl that had him so intrigued? Whatever it was, he couldn’t get caught up in it right now – he really did have to get going. But maybe he could come back? That wouldn’t be too weird, right? It wouldn’t do anyone any harm if he came back to see her again, right?

As Elias walked out of the shop, he caught eyes with the pretty girl – Jojo – behind the counter again, finding himself smiling slightly as she waved goodbye, and it was all he could do to raise his coffee cup in salute as he walked out the door. Maybe a little bit of positivity like that would be good for him, every now and again.

And damn, the coffee was good too.

~

Joanna watched the coffee shop door close with a small smile on her face, replaying that adorable dorky little salute over in her head. That wasn’t the interaction she’d been expecting this dreary Monday morning, but she sure as hell wasn’t going to complain.

“Of all the people you could’ve served this morning, it had to be Elias Pettersson,” Carl mused.

She glanced up at her colleague, raising an eyebrow at the grin on his face.

“What’s so bad about that?” Joanna frowned, “You were the one who actually made his coffee?”

“He’s famous? And cute as hell? And you just acted as if he was anyone else?” he laughed.

Oh, she knew who he was. She wasn’t blind – and this was Vancouver. But why wouldn’t she treat him like anyone else?

“He wasn’t here for a team thing. He wasn’t even wearing any merch. He was literally being just a normal person coming in for coffee,” she shrugged, “I wasn’t going to make him feel awkward about that.”

“Only you, Jojo. Only you,” Carl teased.

Joanna rolled her eyes, smiling fondly, and just shook her head. While she watched hockey like any other Canadian, she wasn’t a superfan – Carl on the other hand absolutely was – and even then, she wasn’t going to treat poor Elias like an alien just for the crime of existing in the coffee shop she worked in. Aside from the fact she was only working part-time around her college classes, Joanna actually quite liked working at the shop; she’d been there since she was 16 so she had the routine down well, she adored her ridiculous co-workers, and she loved the opportunity to brighten someone’s day just by smiling and greeting them. Maybe it wasn’t much to some people, but it was more than enough for her.

And if Elias Pettersson became one of those people whose day she brightened? Well, then she wasn’t going to stop any time soon.

*

“Howdy partner!”

Elias found himself back at the coffee shop two weeks later, now in the first week of October, unable to come in before this Monday morning with training and the roadtrip schedule. He hadn’t been able to stop thinking about the barista, her copper hair and beautiful smile, even to the point where Nils and Brock teased him about his abnormal spacing out, but he’d refused to admit what – or who – occupied his thoughts. No, this was something he wanted to keep for himself, while he was still processing his thoughts about it all. About her. Was he stupid or creepy or weird for not being able to get someone he’d only met once out of his mind? He hoped not. Even so, when he realised he had the Monday morning free, he’d made up his mind to go back to the coffee shop ahead of training later in the morning, not needing the excuse of running. If nothing else, the coffee was damn good. That was how he justified it to himself anyway, rather than letting himself feel like a weirdo for hoping for the chance to see her again.

But there she was, bright smile and cheerful greeting.

“Howdy?” he mused.

“Eh, I’m trying something new this week,” she shrugged, unphased.

There was just something about her optimism that lifted his mood.

“You can’t win them all,” he said simply.

She gasped dramatically, hand clasped over her heart, earning laughter from her colleagues and a small smile from him. Adorable.

“You are a tough guy to win over – I’ll remember that,” she grinned, “Large cappuccino, right? Elias?”

Heat flared on his cheeks at her teasing – he loved that about her, that she made him feel so comfortable – and she remembered his order? After only one time?

“Yeah, that sounds great, thanks,” he nodded.

She hummed to herself as she scribbled the order onto the cup, passing it along to the girl standing next to her before she looked back at him.

“That’ll be $4,” she said, smiling.

He passed over $10, same as the previous time. “Keep the change.”

“Thanks! That’s so kind of you,” she said cheerfully.

Elias didn’t think it was anything particularly kind that he’d done, but he wasn’t going to complain if it got her to smile at him like that. He moved along the counter to wait for his drink, same as last time, and in no time at all the girl behind the coffee machine called out his name. Just as he’d hoped, there was a message written in the pretty cursive handwriting from before.

Image description: handwritten note, in case no-one said it today – you’re great!

Elias let out a soft laugh, a small smile spreading across his lips at the little message. Yet again, the barista’s positivity was infectious. What did the male barista last time say her name was? Jojo? No, it felt weird ‘knowing’ her name when she had never told him it herself. The normal thing to do was to ask her himself, right?

Thankfully there was no other customers at the counter, and she was still standing there by herself, so Elias walked back down to see her, a knot in his stomach that he was trying to ignore.

“Thanks for the message,” he mused.

“Ah, just a little something to make your Monday morning a little brighter,” she shrugged, although a pleased flush dusted her cheeks.

So cute. So ridiculously cute.

“I bet everyone appreciates it,” he added.

She seemed to hesitate for a moment before smiling wryly.

“I don’t write them for everyone,” she admitted, blushing a little harder.

She didn’t? So he was an exception here? Well, that was good to know. Very good.

“In that case, I should probably ask the name of the girl who makes me smile on a Monday morning,” Elias said smoothly.

She laughed, but in a way that he knew wasn’t at him.

“Joanna. Most people call me Jojo,” she said sweetly, smiling up at him.

Joanna. Even more beautiful. While the confidence was still with him, he smiled properly at her, earning a wide smile back.

“Nice to meet you, Joanna.”

“Nice to meet you too, Elias.”

The sound of the coffee shop door opening broke him out of the little bubble they were in, and he cleared his throat, taking a step back to find a sense of normality again. What was it about this girl?

“Thanks for the coffee. See you soon?” he asked hopefully.

Idiot. Of course he’d see her if he came in here while she was working. Idiot.

“Yeah, see you,” she nodded, still smiling.

Well at least she wasn’t laughing at him going from smooth to foolish. That was something at least.

~

She felt like she was on cloud nine. Joanna could only smile to herself as she wiped over the counter after Elias left the shop – he’d actually come in again! And he’d talked to her, even asked her name! It was stupid feeling so giddy after such a short conversation, but damn it he was cute, okay?

“So that was interesting.”

Joanna turned her head to look at her colleague, smile still on her face even as the customers she’d just served moved to a table to sit down. Carl, her usual Monday morning co-worker had swapped his shift with Jessie, the barista who usually worked Tuesday through Friday, so Joanna still knew her well – even if it through her usual routine off, it was still nice to see a friendly face this early in the day.

“What was?” Joanna asked.

“I haven’t seen the two of you interact before, but Carl was right – he’s definitely interested,” Jessie mused.

Of course Carl was gossiping. “He’s not interested. Why would someone like him ever look at me twice? I’m nobody.”

Oops. That came out a little more self-deprecating than she’d intended it too. Not that she was wrong, but still.

Jessie pursed her lips, shaking her head. “Baby, no-one holds a conversation that smoothly if they don’t think you’re cute. And you are not nobody – you are Jojo, queen of the cash register and future empress of sociology. He’s lucky to get those cute little messages from you on his cup, let alone the time of day.”

Joanna blushed, shaking her head.

“You know who he is,” she said, voice soft, “Next to him, I’m literally nothing.”

“And yet he smiled because you treated him like a normal guy. Own that. If nothing else, it’s a bit of flirting to liven up your Monday,” Jessie shrugged.

She was right. Jessie was so right. Joanna had never been someone who viewed the world so negatively, and she wasn’t going to start that now.

“Yeah, that’s true. I can own that,” Joanna said firmly.

“Damn right you can,” Jessie laughed. “Now, where did Carl put the oat milk?”

*

Halloween was both the joy of her year and the bane of her life. Joanna loved the fact that she got to dress up and have some fun with her friends watching spooky movies – in fact, she and a few of her college friends had a standing tradition for after her shift – but it also meant that she had to dress up at work.

So there she was, waving in Carl as he arrived to start his shift at 7am, both of them dressed in full pirate regalia. That was the theme this year; all the people who worked on Halloween decided on co-ordinating outfits, as a fun way to pass the time. Last year they’d decided on superheroes (and Joanna had made a killer Black Widow, if she said so herself), with the previous years including greeks and romans, cheesy 90s romcoms, and even Ghostbusters. It was the only thing that made the working on the day of Halloween worthwhile – even if it took her a little while to get used to all the stares that people sent her.

But she powered on, trying to ignore the fact that she was dressed a little ridiculously. It was Halloween, after all, and she knew for a fact that a good proportion of their customers would probably be wearing costumes at all, so at least that was something to look forward to.

Speaking of things to look forward to…Elias. He’d been in one other Monday this month since he’d asked her name – why Mondays, she still had no idea – but seeing him for a third time this month? Amazing.

“Ahoy matey!”

Oh wow, that one was bad, even for her. But Elias just laughed, immediately smiling at her, and all of a sudden it didn’t matter that she was wearing a tri-corner hat and a billowing white shirt. Funny how that worked.

“Ahoy to you too. You guys are really into Halloween huh?” he said, glancing around at all the decorations they’d put up this morning.

“Oh you have no idea. This is pretty tame for us – and at least the theme could be worse?” she mused.

Elias laughed again, nodding his agreement, leaning on the counter with his elbows as he smiled at her. “Yeah we’ve had some pretty bad group costumes. One year was the Shrek characters. Another year was Minions.”

Damn, yeah okay, she had definitely gotten off lightly with pirates then. Although knowing Elias, he probably pulled off whatever costume he’d worn. Cute as hell – Carl had been right saying that the first time he’d come in.

“Alright, you win,” she giggled.

“It got us a few laughs and a lot of smiles, so it was worth it,” he shrugged, although his cheeks flushed with a light pleased pink.

How sweet.

“Are you having your usual?” she asked, smiling up at him.

“Yeah, go for it,” he nodded, smiling back at her.

Joanna swung her copper braid over her shoulder – still not used to having it out of its usual high ponytail – humming to herself as she scribbled down today’s message. Hopefully this would put a smile on his face too. While Carl made the large cappuccino, Elias stayed up by the cash register, the two of them making small talk about past Halloween experiences, Joanna fully taking advantage of the lack of early customers to take these little extra moments with him. It was things like this that got her through the day, a smile like his on such a pretty face, and the fact that he was willingly talking with her rather than moving along? Well that made all the difference.

“Here you go.”

Carl’s amused voice broke them out of their conversation, Elias taking the cup from her colleague with a dry laugh.

Image description: handwritten note, smiling at strangers never goes out of style.

Elias looked over at her with a little grin, making her let out a breathy laugh even as she allowed herself to indulge into melting into a puddle at the warmth of his gaze.

“You are incredibly sweet, you know that right?”

“Oh, it’s nothing really,” Joanna said, feeling her cheeks heat up in a blush regardless.

“I don’t think you realise how much of an impact you have on people,” Elias shrugged, leaning casually against the counter as he smiled at her.

What a smile it was.

“And yet she’s single as hell, such a shame.”

Joanna flinched at the sound of Carl’s passing remark, cheeks flaring now as she glared at his retreating back, wishing the ground would just swallow her up. It was bad enough that she was dressed as a pirate, but he had to tell Elias of all people that she was single? Why?!

“Their loss.”

“What?” she said, looking back at Elias.

But he just shrugged, still smiling that sweet small smile at her. “All those guys who don’t realise how amazing you are. It’s their loss,” he said simply.

Oh wow.

“Working here as well as taking full-time classes takes up all my time, if I’m being honest,” she said, trying to regain at least a little of her dignity.

“Makes sense,” he mused, “what are you studying?”

She stared at him for a moment, trying to figure out why he was interested in that kind of mundane information, but his intense gaze didn’t change at all. He really was asking her about herself…to get to know her better? Well, she wasn’t going to waste this opportunity.

“I’m studying sociology at UBC. There are so many different aspects to it, like gender equality to law to race and discrimination, and I just love it,” she admitted, smiling shyly now.

It wasn’t often that people asked her the finer details about her life, especially not people like Elias, so the fact that he was still smiling at her after her explanation? Well, that felt good. It felt really good.

“Sounds like you get to do a little bit of everything that actually matters in the world – I can see why you love it,” he said warmly.

And there go the butterflies in her stomach, swirling a merry dance.

“Exactly that! Gives me a chance to narrow down what I want to do with my life, and now that I’m in my final year, I’m excited to see how it goes,” she grinned.

In truth, she was leaning towards going into counselling, having loved the aspects of those modules in particular, and she did have an internship already in place for this summer as she was graduating…so she could only hope that her grades continued to take her on the path she wanted to journey on. It was a little scary, if she was being honest, knowing that all too soon she was going to be released out into the world with no safety barriers around her – but that’s also what made it so exciting. She was going to get to explore a brand-new adventure that she genuinely enjoyed, so what could be better than that?

And if that fantasy included Elias by her side while she took that next step? Well, that was between her and her daydreams, wasn’t it?

“I’d better get going, as much as I’d rather stay here talking to you. You’re much more interesting than most the people I know,” Elias said dryly.

His faux-reluctance made her laugh – like she could compare to his teammates, really – earning a little pleased smile, and she waved him goodbye as he exited the shop. Maybe one day she’d find the courage to flirt with a little more intention with Elias, take that chance on a guy like him – could it be worth it?

~

Joanna’s words, her simple sweet words on his cup, paired with that brilliant grin she sent him as she was talking about her degree, played on his mind the whole drive to the arena, and he found himself unable to stop the smile on his lips even as the team pulled a stupid Halloween mascot jump scare prank for their social media channels. At least he didn’t shriek, just flinched, but even then he could tell the people running it were surprised at his smile as he walked away.

Nothing was going to change his good mood today. Not even a dumb prank. He’d held a full proper conversation with Joanna, finally, and he was finding out more and more about her each time he saw her. He loved it, loved that he was getting to know her so organically, and the fact that she was still taking the time to write those little messages for him? It was everything to him. And now he even knew that she was single too. Even if it was all one-sided infatuation on his end, and she was just being friendly, having these little moments with her made him feel like nothing ever had before. So yeah, he was smiling – he couldn’t help himself, and he didn’t care.

“Okay is this another prank?”

Elias broke out of his thoughts to see Nils and Brock standing in front of him, making him crane his neck up to look at them where he was sitting in his stall in the locker room. Even Thatcher and Quinn were watching him curiously from their own stalls, sending a stab of panic through him that he quickly tried to repress. They knew nothing. And they would continue to know nothing.

“I have no idea what you’re talking about,” Elias said dryly.

“I mean, that’s more like the Petey we know and love…but smiling to yourself like that? What’s gotten you so happy this morning?” Brock teased.

“Hearing you shriek like a little kid at the jump scare?” Elias said, raising an eyebrow.

Brock’s cheeks flushed as the few guys in the locker room laughed, but he was undeterred, like Coolie with a bone. Damn it.

“I bet it’s the same reason he’s been spacey for weeks,” Nils smirked.

“You’ve been spacey? Are you okay?” Quinn asked worriedly.

Oh no. Not the Quinn Hughes puppy dog eyes. Those things were lethal.

“I’m perfectly fine, thank you. I just…”

He trailed off, knowing that if he admitted that he’d met Joanna that he would never hear the end of the teasing.

“Oh man, Petey met someone,” Nils grinned.

Damn it.

And when he didn’t immediately correct his countryman, the 4 men around him all grinned, making Elias groan. Perfect, just what he needed.

“Who is she?” Brock asked, eyes wide with excitement

“Or he. No judgement,” Thatcher added.

That man was a blessing. Not an accurate blessing, in this case, but a blessing all the same.

So Elias sighed. “She. I’ve been going to a new coffee shop and she works there.”

Cue the immature coos and fluttering eyelashes. His teammates truly were the worst.

“So Petey has met a cute barista and is getting his flirt on. Cute!” Nils teased.

“No, no flirting,” he said quickly.

At least, only that little bit of smooth-talking today? That didn’t count, right?

“No flirting? Come on, a pretty boy like you isn’t going to flirt with a cute barista?” Brock laughed.

His laughed stuttered as Elias kicked him in the shin, but that just earned snickers from his other teammates.

“She doesn’t flirt, she’s just being nice,” Elias muttered.

Their laughter abruptly cut off, only making him groan again.

“Oh buddy that can’t be true,” Thatcher frowned.

“You wouldn’t be smiling like that if there wasn’t something there,” Quinn agreed.

If only he could wrap Quinn Hughes in a blanket and protect him from the world.

“He’s right – we all know your smiles, and that was a rare one,” Brock said, as serious as he ever got.

Was that an insult? He wasn’t sure at this point.

“It’s nothing. There’s nothing to talk about,” Elias said shortly.

Thatcher pursed his lips, Quinn smiling sadly at him – only making Elias cringe internally – but Brock and Nils just frowned.

“If you want to talk about it, you know where we are,” Nils said firmly.

Yeah, right.

“But don’t give up just yet, bud. If your time with her is making you smile like this, then I would bet that it’s making her smile too,” Brock added.

He walked over to his own stall after clapping Elias on the shoulder, Nils going to his own too, leaving Elias to his thoughts. Could Brock be right? Joanna was such a bubbly smiley person as it was…but was there a chance he made her smile all by himself? Was there hope after all?

*

The weeks kept passing, and every Monday he was able to, Elias went into Déjà-Brew. He didn’t know why he made it a habit of going only on Mondays, especially when he had other days free when he could go to, but even though he spoke to Joanna a little more each time he visited the coffee shop, he still hadn’t plucked up the courage to ask her what other days she worked. All he knew was that Monday mornings were definitely her opening shift, and that Monday mornings in the shop were the quietest days, so if he could guarantee getting at least a little of her attention on his on that day then he was going to stick with it.

It made sense in his head at least anyway.

Elias managed two visits in the first few weeks of November, more than any other month so far (at least that he’d had the courage to do), and he found his thoughts growing more and more consumed with the little snippets of information he’d managed to gain about her. Joanna was 21 years old, studying sociology at the University of British Columbia, had two younger brothers she adored, had lived in Vancouver her whole life, and her favourite colour was forest green. And those were just the immediate details. There were dozens of little facts about her he was collecting like a dragon with its hoard, and he savoured them all. He knew that he wasn’t sharing as much as she was, but he still found himself talking about his family and how much he missed home in Ange, and she seemed to grow in confidence in asking him about himself too. It was everything, everything he didn’t know he needed, and Elias found himself coveting those few minutes with her when he was able to get them.

And there was the fact that maybe Brock and Nils were right after all – while Joanna was always already smiling when he arrived to the coffee shop, her smile seemed to kick up a few notches the moment she saw him, which was something that made his own traitorous heart beat that little bit faster. He knew he needed to find the courage to do more than just talk to her in passing, needed to take that next step, but there was that niggling voice at the back of his head that told him not to ruin this easy friendship they already had. Was it worth risking everything if she was just being friendly? Was it worth spending so much time caught up in his head when hockey should be his 100% focus? Was he just being ridiculous and delusional in the first place?

How was he supposed to tell? And what was he supposed to do about it?

No, he needed to stop being so stupid about this. They were just talking – there was nothing bad about that. Those little moments on Monday mornings were something he treasured, and considering that Joanna seemed just as happy to see him as he was to see her, he wasn’t going to ruin that for him. For either of them. He just needed to keep his head cool, not get over the top or overwhelmed with it, that was all. He could do that at least, right?

*

The Monday after Thanksgiving weekend was always a little quiet, in Joanna’s experience, and this year it was no different. She’d only served a couple of customers since opening an hour ago, and already she knew that today was going to be a long day. She could feel it, in her bones, and she found herself hoping for something to liven up the day. At least Carl would be joining her any moment, no doubt full of hilarious family drama stories, so she could handle the last 15 minutes on her own before he arrived. Hopefully.

Within minutes, the door opened, and she desperately tried to ignore the way her heart started beating that little bit faster. Elias.

“Sup, homeslice?”

When Elias just mumbled as hello in response, Joanna winced. Maybe not her finest greeting.

“That one wasn’t a winner, huh?”

It was only then that Elias seemed to process her words.

“Oh no, it’s really not you. I had a rough day yesterday,” he admitted, rubbing the back of his neck.

“Ah yeah, overtime loss. Must’ve felt pretty rough,” she grimaced.

A few of the staff from the coffee shop went over to Jessie’s last night to watch the game, Joanna included, and they’d all watched the frustrating game on the edge of their seats. It had been a tough game to watch, if she was being honest, so she could only imagine how he felt.

“You watch hockey?”

The confusion in his voice confused her.

“It’s Vancouver? Hockey is a must?” she mused.

“You know who I am?” Elias said softly.

Ah, okay, now she got it. Did he really think she didn’t know?

“Was I not supposed to?” Joanna teased.

His pale cheeks flushed, making her smile softly.

“No I, uh, I didn’t mean to be arrogant. You just…never said anything,” he winced.

Bless his heart.

“Well I figured you were coming in here as just Elias, not Elias Pettersson number 40 for the Vancouver Canucks. So I didn’t think you’d want to be fawned over, when you were just being you. Was I wrong?” Joanna asked.

She didn’t think she’d been reading him wrong all this time. But had she? He’d seemed so normal…

“No, you’re not wrong at all. No-one’s ever-”

His words were cut off by the door opening and two women walking in, new customers that ended their privacy, Carl appearing behind them as well. It had been quiet all morning and now people had to come in?! No-one’s ever…what? Treated him like a normal human being? No, this wasn’t the time for it, whatever he was about to say. Time to get back to reality.

“Are you having your normal cappuccino?” Joanna asked, smiling softly.

“Yeah, thanks,” Elias nodded.

Joanna chewed her bottom lip as she scribbled on the order, hesitating before writing today’s message. Hopefully she wasn’t coming across as too forward. Hopefully she wasn’t being too much. She stayed silent as she quickly made his cappuccino, Carl still signing in for the day, as Elias moved along the counter, but she kept glancing over at him, watching his exhausted figure as closely as she could. When she finally put the lid on the coffee cup and passed it over, she didn’t move away from her spot, waiting for Elias to pick up his coffee order with bated breath.

Image description: handwritten note, stop to take a minute and breathe, with a drawn heart.

His cheeks flushed a light pink again, and he immediately looked over to her, smiling softly in a way that made her heart skip a beat.

“Thank you, Joanna,” he murmured.

“Any time, Elias,” she murmured in response.

She ignored Carl standing next to her as she watched Elias walk out of the shop a little hopelessly, butterflies making havoc in her stomach.

“Oh Jojo, you’ve got it bad,” Carl teased.

“You have no idea,” she sighed, moving back to the register.

~

Elias slumped down onto Brock’s sofa as soon as he arrived at his house, ignoring Nils staring at him from across the room as Milo immediately curled up next to him, head resting on his thigh as Coolie curled up by his feet. If the dogs could tell something was wrong with him, then there was no doubt that Nils and Brock would too. Not ideal. But then again, why had he come over to Brock’s if he didn’t want a little comfort?

“Well don’t you look a picture of positivity?” Brock mused, passing him a cold beer.

Elias took it without a word but didn’t take a sip, just picking at the label instead.

“Oh it’s even worse than I thought,” Nils murmured.

Elias wasn’t sure if he was meant to hear that or not, but either way he didn’t respond.

“Okay buddy, out with it. What’s happened? It can’t be the overtime loss yesterday, right? Like, I know it was rough, but it wasn’t that rough?” Brock prompted, sitting down next to him.

Neither dog moved, making Elias smile minutely, but he just shook his head. “No, it wasn’t the game.”

Nils hummed sitting down in the armchair on his other side, leaning forward on his elbows to look at Elias critically for a few moments.

“It’s the coffee shop girl, isn’t it?” he eventually said.

There was no teasing in his tone, no jokes to be made that would’ve riled Elias up, but he still sighed, finally taking a sip of the beer that Brock had given him.

“Oh Petey, she didn’t turn you down, did she?” Brock winced.

Hah, that would require Elias to actually ask her out.

“I didn’t ask her out. It’s just…she’s so sweet. And kind. And smiley and positive and happy, and I don’t think she’s interested in me at all,” Elias mumbled.

There it was, all out in the open, vulnerable for his two closest teammates to see. It made him a little nervous to expose himself like that, if he was being honest, but it was done now. He couldn’t take it back. All he could do was avoid their eyes and focus on giving Milo the attention he deserved.

“Why do you think she’s not interested?”

“Her colleague said that she’s super positive and friendly 100% of the time. That was one of the first things I learned about her, so I don’t know if it’s just me reading into things wrong,” Elias explained sadly.

At this point, Elias didn’t know what was real and what wasn’t. His head was swirling with all the interactions they’d had, and he hated that he couldn’t trust his gut instinct, couldn’t believe all the wonderful conversations they’d had. What was wrong with him?

“What aren’t you telling us?” Brock said softly.

“What?” he said, frowning.

“What’s caught your eye about this girl that you haven’t mentioned before?” Brock said, “There’s something, I can tell.”

Elias chewed his bottom lip absent-mindedly, before deciding to just tell them everything. What could it really hurt, at this point.

“Joanna writes messages on my coffee cups. Like, sweet little phrases, just to make me smile. And she told me herself that she doesn’t write them for just anyone. And we’ve been talking, more and more each time I’ve gone in there – she’s so smart, and sweet, and kind, and she’s just so interesting. But I don’t know if I’m just creating this fantasy in my head because she’s kind of perfect to me.”

He lifted his eyes to see Brock mouthing the word ‘perfect’ to himself, eyes wide like he was a little stunned. He didn’t bother looking over to Nils, dreading his reaction to his outburst. It wasn’t like he talked about his feelings like this on a normal basis, and to be honest, he was kind of regretting talking about it at all.

“Maybe she’s just hard to read? Like, you’re really difficult to read and your face is full of the exact emotions you’re feeling all the time,” Nils suggested.

Was that an insult? He wasn’t sure at this point. It wasn’t like he could hide his resting bitch face, but he didn’t think he’d been doing that around Joanna.

“I don’t think she’s hard to read,” he sighed, “But maybe I just suck at reading how people truly feel. Vancouver is different to Ange. People act differently here.”

Wasn’t that the truth.

“Petey, have you even actively flirted?” Brock asked, raising an eyebrow.

“What?”

“You are a bit of a grumpy cat,” Nils agreed, “Maybe you think you’ve been flirting but she doesn’t know you’ve been flirting.”

He cursed the day that Nils discovered North American memes.

“Bud, you’ve got to make a move,” Brock said firmly, bringing Elias’s attention back to him.

“Oh my god it’s her place of work. I’m not going to be a creep,” Elias shot back.

But Brock just rolled his eyes, shaking his head. “Not like, grab her and kiss her because, ew, consent. I meant like, making a statement. Doing something bold.”

Elias pursed his lips in a frown, mulling over Brock’s words as he took a sip of beer to buy himself some time to think. Doing something bold? Like what? He wasn’t exactly a bold move person – he was chill, cool, casual, no pressure. Something like that was the opposite of his usual persona…but maybe Joanna was worth pushing the boat out? Especially after such a sweet message this morning?

“What could I even do?”

The grins that spread over Nils’ and Brock’s faces sent an unsettled pang through his body, but he ignored his flight response just this one time.

“Okay, so I have some ideas…”

*

Halfway through December – well, the 11th – and it was officially two weeks too long since Joanna had taken a chance on being vulnerable with Elias, since he found out that she’d known who he was the whole time. The more time that passed, the more she regretted every moment of that encounter, especially the little heart she’d put on the cup. It was beyond unprofessional, even as friendly as the two of them had gotten, and she hated the thought of him avoiding coming into the shop just because she’d been dumb for a few minutes.

Was she thinking too much into it? It wasn’t like he’d done anything other than lightly flirting with her – he could’ve just been passing the time of day, not slipping into dangerous feelings territory like she was. And even just thinking like that made her cringe, made her feel like an idiot, but she couldn’t help it. All she ever wanted to do was make people smile, and the thought of Elias potentially feeling too awkward around her now? No, she couldn’t face that.

All she could hope was that he would eventually come back into Déjà-Brew, to give her a chance to get them, and herself, back to a bit of normality. Was that too much to ask?

Thankfully, while she was still working out the front of the shop by herself just before 7am, Elias walked through the front door, hesitant smile on his face. Okay, play it cool. She could play it cool, just be friendly, be her usual positive cheerful self. It wasn’t that hard.

“What’s up buttercup?”

Aggressively normal. Ouch. By the slight crease in his brow, even Elias could tell that her positivity was a bit forced this Monday morning, and Joanna internally grimaced for even feeling like she had to overcompensate for how vulnerable she got last time he came in. But what else could she do?

“Are you having your usual cappuccino?” she asked, smiling a little less intensely.

She wasn’t sure why she had to ask that. He always said yes, always said the same thing. But it just felt like part of the routine they had, and she didn’t want to change of that if she didn’t have to. She just wanted things to be normal.

“Yes. But, um, I have this now,” Elias murmured.

He seemed to hesitate slightly, before he pulled a reusable to-go cup out of his coat pocket. What was all of that about not changing routines? About being normal?

Joanna felt her heart break a little bit as she looked down at the to-go cup he’d placed on the counter in front of her, realising he didn’t want her handwritten note this time. That’s what this was about, right? Message received. She didn’t think that she’d crossed the line last time – he hadn’t seemed offended or awkward with it – but clearly she’d crossed a line. Message received. Silently, she picked up the travel mug, biting her bottom lip in humiliation…until she noticed there was already a note on a sticky label on the cup.

Image description: handwritten note, I like you a latte.

Her lips parted in surprise, not daring to glance up at the guy in question. He specifically wrote this…for her to see? He wrote a coffee pun, just for her?

“It was a close call between you mocha me smile and where have you bean all my life?”

His voice broke her out of her stunned thoughts, and she finally looked up at him to see him smiling shyly at her.

Oh.

Oh.

Oh wow. That…that was unexpected. Wow. Butterflies dared to dance in her stomach, excitement soared through her blood, but she tried valiantly to push them down.

“You really put the effort in there, huh?” she said, smiling softly back at him.

“You’re worth the possible soul-destroying rejection,” Elias mused, shrugging.

Rejection?

“What?” she asked, confused.

Elias sighed softly, rubbing a hand over the back of his neck, before he took a shaky breath. “I know that I’m hard to read, and maybe I’ve been watching too many CW shows with Brock, but I figured that if I don’t take a shot here then I’m an idiot.”

“Elias…” she breathed, trailing off.

He just smiled wryly at her, cheeks a little flushed but seemingly undeterred.

“You make my Monday mornings better. You make me better. And I really hope I’m not reading things wrong and being a pressurising creep in your place of work…but would you like to go out with me some time?”

Her lips parted in surprise, but that didn’t stop a wide smile spreading across her face.

“Oh my god. Wow. I, uh, absolutely,” she said, nodding, laughing a little incredulously, “I would definitely like to go out with you.”

Did she just say that? Did she really just say that?

The look of relief that spread across Elias’s face made her smile even more, and as he sent her a beaming smile back, her heartbeat started to race. No wonder he smiled like that so rarely – it was a danger to society, clearly.

“Really?” he asked, sounding like he didn’t quite believe his luck.

What a ridiculous notion.

“Really,” she nodded, her smile a little shyer now. “I never thought someone like you would ever been interested in regular old me.”

“Well regular old me, I’m Just Elias in here, remember?” he mused.

She laughed at his teasing smile, nodding at the use of her own words.

“Alright Just Elias, it’s a date,” Joanna said happily.

As he passed her his phone for her to input her phone number – and wasn’t that a concept she never imagined happening – she ignored Carl smugly collecting money from their colleagues, too consumed with the giddiness of Elias actually asking her out. He asked her out. She was going on a date with Elias Pettersson. No, Just Elias, just Elias the guy that made Mondays her favourite day of the week.

“There, now you have my number too,” Elias said, smiling sweetly at her.

Joanna smiled sweetly back at him as her phone buzzed in her pocket, just nodding.

“I look forward to seeing what you plan for our date,” Joanna said, taking a chance on flirting a little harder than usual.

The intensity in Elias’s gaze made butterflies tease at her stomach.

“I look forward to taking you on your last first date,” he said smoothly.

That concept, paired with his slight smirk, made her head spin and the butterflies riot. Now she really couldn’t wait for their date. “That’s a pretty bold statement, Elias,” she said softly, smile tugging at her lips.

“Being bold got me your number, didn’t it?” he mused, although his cheeks flushed slightly.

She couldn’t argue with that. Both of them stepping out of their comfort zones had gotten them where they were right now, and quite honestly, she was thankful for it. Never had she so openly flirted with anyone, and she could imagine he rarely took the chance that he had taken with her. So if being bold was the way to go? Well, she couldn’t wait to see what happened next.

[aching-tummies]

RP Starter: Manufactured Ache

It's about 5:45AM on the first of two days off. My little tummy woke me with a deep, hungry growl. Right…I did skip dinner the night before in favour of getting some much-needed sleep. I've been stressed to the nines lately, waking up at 4AM or 5AM on days off to deal with timezone nonsense as I make calls to head-office stuff across the country for various things, mostly banking-related.

Normally, I get up around 8AM for work, but my tummy doesn't handle food/digesting stuff well until closer to 10AM so I usually hold off on breakfast until then to avoid a painful tummy ache (the kind that literally makes my toes curl). On days off, I often hold off on putting anything but water in my tummy until closer to 1PM or 2PM, even if I am hungry.

I've been sitting up in bed, languidly rubbing my tummy since 5:30AM as it's been clenching uncomfortably, letting out loud growls thanks to the mouthful of cold water I gulped down to chase away a case of cotton-mouth. I can feel another growl building beneath my palm. My stomach is clenching, seemingly consolidating it all for a big gurgle. As it comes, you stir to my right in bed, having heard this second growl. You slide a hand onto my belly before you even open your eyes, feeling the tense muscles under my skin.

"Hmmm? Morning, babe." I murmur, still stroking my belly as the aftershocks of the gurgle reverberate around my gut. I give a small belch, the little bit of air that got displaced with the gulp of water coming up and out with the pressure of both of our hands on my tummy. "It's not even 6--go back to sleep. It's too early to be up on a day off." I mutter tiredly as I shuffle back to lying down. I was only up to indulge in the sensations caused by that gulp of water. I wasn't expecting my guts to be active so early in the morning.

Your eyes snap open at my statement and you sit bolt-upright in bed, eyes wide and tell-tale grin on your face. Day off? Time's a-wastin'!

You've had this idea in your head for a while now, having seen and tended to my stressy tummy aches for weeks on end. Today marks the first true day off after over a month and a half of stressing out over responsibilities for me. The first in a long, long, long period of stress-induced upset tummy aches. It didn't help that I contracted a bit of the flu for a couple of days at the start of this stressful period. My schedule during those days was brutal: tossing my cookies from 3AM-6AM, trying to soothe my sickly tummy from 6AM-8AM, working an 8-10 hour shift at any of my three jobs, getting home after 9PM and immediately falling asleep--at the dinner table, at the entrance trying to remove my shoes, etc.--only to rinse and repeat.

The stressful period was out of our control. The effects of the flu was out of our control. While you certainly enjoyed tending to what was there, a part of your brain has been wondering about intentionally causing a tummy ache and how a manufactured ache would compare to all of the ones that have simply developed due to circumstances. Right now, we're dawning on the first of back-to-back days off. Our schedules have lined up for the first time in forever and we are almost 6 hours down of a potential 48 for fun and indulgence. You pat at my tummy, a wide grin blooming on your face as you think of all the possibilities.

Well then, what are you going to do first?

[wenevergotusedtoegypt]

The last 2 nights have been awful for sleep.

For context, 1yo has a pack n play in our room. He starts out the night there, but he consistently wakes up 1-2 times on a typical night, and I'm usually too tired to put him in his bed after he nurses, leave the room, and wait til he falls asleep before I can go back to sleep (he won't go to sleep if he knows I'm right there). So recently he's been spending a good chunk of a typical night in my bed, because he'll go right to sleep if I lay with him there.

But the past 2 nights, something has been going on with him and we can't figure out what it is. He wakes up, I nurse him. He finishes, and I ask him if he's ready to go back to bed. He gives me a sleepy nod, I carry him back to my bed....and then as soon as I put him on it, he starts freaking out, fussing, and try to climb off the edge of the bed even though it's too tall for him to get down safely on his own. I ask if he wants more milk, he nods. Repeat the whole process. If I try to put him in his own bed, he just cries and cries.

The night before last, I was up with him from like 3am-6am. My husband took over when 4yo woke up and I went back to sleep til 9. 1yo didn't go back asleep til he got to playgroup. 4yo was also up for a while at like 4am (he regularly wakes up 2-3 times a night).

Last night when the pattern started, my husband took over earlier on and 1yo ended up falling asleep on the living room floor for like 2 hours. Then he woke up again and so did 4yo. They both wanted to eat. 1yo fell asleep on the living room floor again while 4yo was still eating. My husband was half asleep on the couch and when 4yo came into the room to get him, it woke up 1yo, and the 2 of them ended up playing a bit while my husband fell asleep on the couch. At some point 1yo fell asleep on the floor again and 4yo climbed onto the couch with my husband and fell asleep. My husband moved back to his bed at like 7:00 and then both kids came into our room at like 7:15 (which was super disorienting for me because I had no idea 1yo wasn't either in his bed or my husband's).

So I'm just like...really dreading tonight at this point. I don't understand why 1yo doesn't want to go back to sleep. He's clearly tired since he ends up falling asleep on the floor, he doesn't say no when I ask if he's ready to go back to bed, he's getting to sleep in my bed with me, I nurse him til he chooses to stop over and over and have tried offering a supplemental bottle too just in case my supply is down. He doesn't seem uncomfortable in any way prior to being put back in the bed, and nothing has changed about the bed or the room since this started.

We really want to move him into 4yo's room soon, but if he's doing this thing when we do it, he's going to keep 4yo up for extended periods of time nightly. I'm just not sure what to do.

[shion-yu]

Gave myself almost-pneumonia and my couch looks like a damn stock photo.

Since the whole time I’ve been like, “Am I living one of my shitty fanfictions? Coz this sucks.” Let me tell y’all a story.

Cold weather sucks as a severe asthmatic. I moved to the South so I didn’t have to deal with the frigid winters of upstate NY. I’m basically on and off sick until Spring comes (and then there’s allergy season but I digress). I think it’s helped some, but my lungs are just fucked up ok?

Anyways I went to a concert last Saturday and it was freezing. Then I went to the zoo on Sunday with a friend and it was also cold and swarming with kids who don’t know how to cover their mouths when they cough. It was a great weekend but by Tuesday I was sick - great. I had some warning bc my friend I went to the zoo with said they got sick yesterday. But it just seemed like a minor cold and I’ve been through this a million times, I truly did not think it was gonna get too much worse. My asthma was mostly under control and I rested a lot all week.

Thursday I’m more tired, but I start nebulizer treatments and even skip ice skating class and reschedule it for Saturday bc hey, I’m responsible. But Friday I start to feel worse. Like to the point where everybody at work is like wtf go home and one of them told me she’s gonna get me holy water. But it’s okay, it’s still been SO much worse and I’m really fine.

Saturday morning I wake up and I feel like I’m cured. So I go to ice skating class. And maybe I take a little walk in the rain. Bad fuckin idea. By the end of the day I’m having full blown asthma attacks one after the other and sweating like crazy. My abdomen is aching from coughing so much that it hurts to sit up. But I really don’t want to go to the ER. Not again. So I message my pulmonologist and hope I can just say never mind I’m good now by the time he answers on Monday.

That brings us to today, Sunday. I woke up at 6am after only 4 hours of sleep because I can’t stop choking. I’m sneezing and coughing up fluorescent green stuff, my throat tastes like blood and I have a fever. I really, really didn’t want to go to the doctor but it’s time. I drag my sorry ass to urgent care where the entire hour I sit in waiting, everybody who walks by gives me a ‘goddamn’ look because I’m coughing loud enough to alert the entire damn office. I’m so embarrassed bc what if they think I’m being dramatic and wasting time - again? I awkwardly explain my situation and the doctor sends me for CXR. When it comes back he says “Well, you don’t have pneumonia yet but see alllll this stuff here? That’s inflammation. I’m gonna prescribe antibiotics and (way heavier) steroids and you might have bronchitis already but your asthma is so bad that it’s indistinguishable by now. Also with your lungs you probably won’t be able to tell you have pneumonia until it’s pretty bad.”

So anyways, that’s my week. At least I got a lot of writing done for Whumptober - didn’t have to dig very deep to find enough misery to go around to all my fav OCs lol.

[pettyrevenge-base]

Wake me with your alarm? Guess my day starts now, too.

I (28F) live with my boyfriend (29M) and one roommate (35M) in a house that I own. They both work at the same company, so their workday starts at 6AM. I WFH so I sleep/get up pretty much whenever I want. It's worth noting that I am a very light sleeper, and my boyfriend is a fairly heavy sleeper that I usually have to wake despite his alarm.

My boyfriend's alarm goes off at 5:30. He usually gets dressed and heads to work by 5:40, which is fine. In those 10 minutes I'll pack his lunch, make him coffee, and get him set up for the day. My roommate however, has a very loud, blaring alarm that goes off every 5 minutes between 5 and 5:30, when he finally rolls out of bed and gets ready. Even on weekends, he'll sometimes let his alarm go off until 6 until it finally shuts off on its own. It's very annoying.

I have no idea why he sets his alarm to be so damn loud that the whole house hears it, especially since he's also a light sleeper (supposedly) and has expressed before that me watching TV in my room at night keeps him up, even if I close the door. If the alarm was quieter I wouldn't care, but at that point he wakes my dogs, and he's even woken my boyfriend's daughter (3F) who stays with us on occasion. Needless to say, once that first alarm goes off at 5, I'm awake, and so is everyone else. I don't know if you've ever dealt with a toddler being unwillingly woken up at 5AM, but it's not pretty, especially since she usually wakes up between 9:30 and 10.

I've asked him a number of times if he could just turn down the alarm a little so he doesn't wake the whole house. He refuses to do so. Cue petty revenge.

My wake up routine usually involves taking a shower, then doing the dishes/cleaning, caring for the dogs, etc. If we have the baby, I'll make breakfast and put on a show for her to watch while she wakes up. Two of my three dogs are fairly large, so they make noise when I let them out of their crates and feed them. So, the past few days I've been dragging my ass out of bed at 5, and starting my routine. None of which I do quietly. I'm awake anyway, and it's my house, so I can do what I want.

The toddler will usually fall asleep again on the couch (even if I turn on the TV), so I put a show on for her at a normal volume. At 5. My dogs are energetic so I let them out of their crates to run around. At 5. Dishes? 5AM, baby. TikTok's in the living room? 5 again. Wake me up at 5, that's when my day will start.

I haven't gotten much out of my roommate except for dirty looks and the occasional "why are you awake?" to which I simply respond with, "because you woke me." He's not the sharpest tool in the shed, so he's started to complain that I'm being petty for no reason. I again suggested for him to turn down the alarm or at least lessen the frequency, but he's refused to do so. Guess we'll all just keep waking up at 5.

Except for my boyfriend, of course. He can sleep through virtually anything. Bless his heart. I should go wake him.

Source: reddit.com/r/pettyrevenge

[wikiangela-fanfics]

Fictober22 - 9. Sounds like a you problem.

Fandom: 911

Relationship: Buck x Eddie

Words: 725

Ao3

Note: I don't even know what this is, just another silly ficlet that I wrote in 10 minutes in the middle of the night lmao

***

When Eddie wakes up, he feels Buck before even opening his eyes. Buck is literally sprawled on top of Eddie, pinning him to the bed. This tends to happen quite often, because, as Eddie found out rather quickly at the start of their relationship, Buck is a cuddler. Every morning they wake up together, Buck is all over Eddie, either spooning him, using his chest as a pillow, or laying almost fully on top of him, like right now.

Eddie loves it, honestly, and on a lazy Sunday morning, when they can sleep in, and he knows Christopher would sleep late, too, he wants nothing more than to just stay in bed as long as he can with his boyfriend. Normally that’s what happens. This morning, however, he needs to get out of bed right away, since his bladder feels like it’s about to explode. Maybe those few beers last night were not a good idea.

The problem is, there is a heavy weight pinning down his whole torso and his arms, and he can’t really move. He glances at the clock. It’s barely 6am, and he doesn’t want to wake Buck up, but he has no choice. 

“Babe.” he says, managing to pull out his arm from between their bodies, where it lay across Eddie’s stomach. That causes Buck to murmur something incoherent in protest to the movement. “Buck, I need to get up.” he adds a bit louder, shaking Buck’s arm lightly.

“No.” Buck responds sleepily, not moving an inch. His voice is a bit muffled, since his face is burrowed into Eddie’s pillow right next to his head. This man has a whole other side of the bed and a perfectly fine pillow, but still is as close to Eddie as he can. It’s annoyingly adorable. 

“Please let me go.” Eddie chuckles. “I’ll be right back.”

“I’m comfortable. Not moving.” he sounds like he’s still half asleep, but with each second he’s more alert. Eddie really hates having to wake him up. 

“I need to go to the bathroom.”

“Sounds like a you problem.” Buck mutters, stubbornly staying still.

“It’s gonna be yours, too, if I piss myself in the bed right now.” Eddie says half-jokingly, half scared that it’s gonna happen. “I’ll be gone a minute and then we’ll get back to cuddling, I promise.” he adds, rubbing his hand soothingly over Bucky’s back. He can be grumpy if he’s woken up way too early, especially if he’s sure that he’ll be able to sleep in as late as he wants, as was the case today. 

“Ugh.” Buck grunts, as if it’s such a difficult task. “I was so comfortable.” he complains, finally rolling off of Eddie, eyes still closed. “What time is it anyway?”

“Early. Go back to sleep if you wanna, I’ll be right back.” Eddie rushes out, then sprints to the bathroom. God, drinking alcohol soon before sleep is so not a good idea. After relieving himself, he washes his hands, and goes back to his bedroom, on the way checking on his son who’s still fast asleep. 

Buck opens his eyes when Eddie enters the room.

“You woke me up, now I can’t fall back asleep.” he complains as Eddie gets under the covers, and then, as expected, Buck wraps his arms around him and puts his face in the crook of Eddie’s neck.

“Sorry.” Eddie chuckles. “Not my fault you like to sleep on top of me.”

“I like to do other stuff on top of you, too.” Buck drawls, his breath tickling Eddie.

“Oh really?” he can’t help a smile, as he runs his fingers through Buck’s hair. 

“Mhm. And now that you woke me up…” he pulls away slightly to look at Eddie with a mischievous smile. “We need to do something to occupy all that time we have to ourselves right now.”

“Do we? And what if I wanna go back to sleep?” Eddie teases.

“Tough shit, I’m wide awake now, and it’s your fault.” his tone is playful, too.

“Well, I guess we do have time to kill.” he grins, pulling Buck closer to give him a kiss, which quickly turns heated.

And, well, Eddie can’t get out of bed for much longer then, again because of Buck pinning him down, but this time he absolutely does not want or need to. 

[hbyrde36]

Chapter 8!

ao3 link

Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5 Chapter 6 Chapter 7

Steve Harrington: Vampire Hunter

When Steve woke he was immediately overcome with a wave of nausea and a searing pain in the side of his neck. He felt so sick that he couldn’t even appreciate the fact that he was, by some miracle, still alive. He didn’t know where he was, the only thing he could see from his position was the blood-red fabric of the couch he was lying on, but he didn’t have the capacity to panic about that just yet. He was expending all of his energy trying not to throw up. He groaned, swallowing reflexively to keep the bile down.

“It’s the blood loss.” An unfamiliar voice said, from what sounded like only a few feet away.

Steve turned his head slowly to see who it belonged to. He found a young black man, a vampire, smiling down at him and holding a bottle of Gatorade out in his direction like an offering.

“The sooner you can sit up and drink some fluids. the sooner you’ll start feeling better.” The stranger explained.

“Who..” Steve started to ask, but the other man held up a hand, encouraging him to save his strength.

“I’m Jeff, a friend of Eddie’s. You’re in his office at Guilty Pleasures.”

The vampire helped him to a sitting position, which Steve allowed because, one, he was too weak to fight him off, and two, he didn’t want to be a dick when the guy was just trying to be nice. He took his time, sipping on the drink until it was about half gone, but eventually he had to start asking questions.

“Why didn’t Billy kill me? Why bring me here?”

Jeff shrugged. “Maybe he thinks he can use you for something. Also, it’s…frowned upon, to harm another vampire’s human servant.”

“But, I'm not..” Steve insisted, weakly.

“How you feel is irrelevant.” The vampire said, waving off his objection. “Eddie has marked you twice. You are his and he is yours. Might as well get used to the idea.”

Steve glared at him.

Jeff raised an eyebrow. “Would you prefer Billy had killed you?”

“Yes!…No!…I don’t know!” Steve hissed.

He looked away first, fishing his phone out of his pocket and angrily thumbed through it looking for the Uber app. He remembered double parking last night and assumed his car would have been towed.

“Any idea what tow company The Corroded Coffin would use?” Steve asked. He didn’t really expect Jeff to know, but it was worth a try. The last thing he wanted to do was spend half the day calling all over town looking for his car.

“No, but if you’re worried about your car, it’s parked out front. Whoever brought you here last night brought it too.”

“Oh.” Steve patted his pockets, his keys were there. “Thanks.”

When it seemed like he was no longer in danger of passing out again, Jeff excused himself. Sunrise wasn’t far off, and he’d needed to get to wherever it was he normally slept off the daylight hours.

Once alone, Steve drained the rest of the sports drink quickly and decided to risk standing. He was a little woozy but feeling better by the minute. He left the office, venturing out into the club beyond to make his way to the exit. It was empty at this hour of the morning, of course, and he found himself staring at the pole set in the middle of the center stage as he crossed the room. He flushed all over, recalling his dream about Eddie.

Steve ground his teeth, angry at himself for reacting to the memory this way. There was nothing he could do about how attractive Eddie was, it was a simple fact, an undeniable law of the universe. What he could do, is remind himself that this monster, no matter how pretty, had trapped him into some magical lifelong bond bullshit without his consent.

The moment his foot hit the sidewalk he unlocked his phone and pressed the button to call Nancy.

“Steve?” She sounded groggy, as if he had woken her up. In fairness It was barely 6am, so he probably had.

“I know the master of the city’s daytime resting place.” Steve stated, no patience for greetings or formalities.

“Great, tell me.” She sounded instantly more awake. It almost made him smile. Almost.

“I’ll do you one better. I’ll show you.” Steve offered. He had no intention of giving her the information and calling it a day. He wanted to see that motherfucker’s corpse for himself.

“Does that mean you want in on it?” Nancy asked.

He waited until he was safely in the car with the door shut before replying. “He killed Chrissy last night.”

“..Oh Steve. I'm so sorry.”

“Can you meet me at my house in 20?”

-

Nancy beat him there, but at least this time she opted to wait outside instead of breaking into his house. She took one look at him and her jaw dropped, no doubt having spotted the bite wound on his neck.

Inside, Steve filled her in on a little bit more of what he’d been up to for the past few days. He didn’t share every detail, and purposely said nothing at all about Eddie, but gave her the bare minimum of information to explain his plan.

He wanted to get in contact with Gareth, the young wererat king who had inadvertently helped him that first night. If the rats would tell him and Nancy how they got into that basement room, they could sneak in during the day and take Billy and Neil out while they slept without having to fight through any daytime security. It was a good plan, she quickly agreed.

Steve didn’t have any contacts in that part of the supernatural world himself, but Robin did. He sent her off a short text asking if she could get him in touch with Gareth, or someone close to him, but left it at that. He couldn’t tell her about the bite, not yet, she’d lose her mind and probably kidnap him in some misguided attempt at keeping him safe.

He didn’t tell her about Chrissy either. He wasn’t ready to think about it too hard yet, much less talk about it. Robin responded right away, and mercifully didn’t question him on the why, though he knew she would do just that later.

He was dead on his feet, still suffering the effects of blood loss, compounded by the lack of any real sleep. Unconsciousness didn’t quite count, did it?

Nancy ordered him to take a shower and a nap, and for once he was more than happy to comply. He could rest easy knowing she was there watching his back.

-

Steve sighed, becoming aware of the delicious tickle of fingertips running up and down body. Their path began low on his thigh and trailed slowly up, taking a detour in the dip of his hip, before gliding over the firm plane of his stomach and through his chest hair, coming to rest briefly in the hollow of his throat before reversing the process and beginning again.

His eyes remain closed, all the better to enjoy the sensation of someone else’s hands on him. He didn’t quite remember falling asleep, but this was certainly the most lovely way to wake up.

His thoughts were fuzzy, jumbled. He didn’t know who was in the bed with him, but for some reason the idea didn’t scare him the way it should have. He fought to open his eyelids and finally succeeded, finding the most beautiful face of pale skin and deep brown eyes filling his field of vision.

Eddie hovered above him, his pretty pink mouth mere inches away from Steve’s own.

“Hi sweetheart.” Eddie said, grinning in a way that displayed his dimples in all their glory. He dipped down, lips brushing over Steve's in a featherlight kiss. It was jarring, so unlike the frenzied and passionate exchanges they had shared so far.

Something niggled at the back of Streve’s mind. “Eddie, Is this real?” He asked, whispering into the space between them when Eddie finally pulled away.

“As real as a dream can be I suppose, big boy.” Eddie moved away to lay on his side, propped up on one elbow.

Steve sat up and pushed himself against the headboard, desperate to put more space between himself and the other man before he did something stupid.

“That wasn’t exactly an answer. Are you really a dream or is this more vampire mind trick crap?”

“This is a dream.” Eddie said, gesturing at the general area around them. “But I am very real. My body may not actually be present in the room with you, but I am here.”

Steve's heart raced, something he didn’t know was possible to feel in a dream. Of course, he hadn’t known any of this was possible before now. “What is wrong with you? Why are you doing this to me?”

Eddie smirked, drawing mindless circles into the sheet with a finger. “Why, have you not been having a good time?”

“That’s not the point, Eddie! You’ve been invading my dreams, making me do things!” Steve shouted.

Eddie didn’t miss a beat. “Let me stop you right there, sweet thing. I haven't been making you DO anything. You have free will here, they are your dreams after all. Besides, you could keep me out if you wanted to, but you’ve been so busy enjoying yourself that It didn't even occur to you to try, did it?”

Embarrassment, fear, and anger mingled together in Steve's mind to create a very potent cocktail of rage. It was all that was needed to spur him on, to try and force Eddie out. He said nothing, just closed his eyes and concentrated on his task.

When Eddie spoke next his voice held a hint of panic. “Wait, Steve. Please. I’m sorry, okay? I can help you with Billy if you just..”

“No, Eddie! I don’t want your help!” Steve screamed as loud as he could, and when he opened his eyes again, the vampire was gone. Lying in his place was a single red rose.

-

“Steve! Steve! Wake up!”

It took Steve what felt like a very long time to open his eyes. He could feel Nancy shaking his shoulder and calling to him, trying to rouse him, but it sounded like it was coming from another room, or miles away. It was hard to tell. When he did manage to finally wake up completely, she punched him in the arm, hard.

“What the hell? You scared the shit out of me!”

“Sorry.” He mumbled. “How long were you trying to wake me up?” He sat up, rubbing his eyes and trying to focus on the clock.

“A while.”

“Sorry.” He apologized again. It’s not like he had done it on purpose or anything, but he still felt bad. He wasn’t used to seeing Nancy rattled.

“It’s okay, just, you were talking and shouting in your sleep, and then you wouldn’t wake up.” She was staring so intently at his face that it was making him squirm. Nancy had a way of looking through you, of figuring things out, and that’s the last thing he felt like dealing with right now.

Steve nodded and looked away, reaching for his phone on the nightstand as a distraction. He wanted to see if there were any new messages from Robin. He had apparently been asleep for a couple hours.

“Who’s Eddie?” Nancy asked.

Steve dropped his phone in surprise and it clattered loudly to the floor. His eyes snapped back to hers, too quickly to not be suspicious. “No one. It doesn’t matter.” He grit out, tone making it clear that the subject was not up for discussion.

She raised her hands in surrender. “Okay, fine.”

He climbed off the bed and retrieved his phone. There was a message from Robin, which he read aloud to Nancy. The rat king had agreed to meet with Steve at the Waffle house out by the airport at 10pm. Robin also asked if he wanted her to go with him. He knew she was worried, and he felt bad about keeping things from her, but the situation had become far too dangerous. He thanked her for the help but said he was fine, reluctantly adding that he was taking backup in the form of Nancy Wheeler, when she threatened to show up to the meeting anyway. Robin wasn’t Nancy’s biggest fan, but she knew there wasn’t anyone better to have on your side in a fight, so she agreed to stay safe at home as long as he filled her in on every detail when he could.

“We need to clean that bite before we go anywhere.” Nancy said, as he set the phone down.

Steve nodded, knowing this was coming. He’d carefully washed the area in the shower earlier, but that’s not the kind of cleansing Nancy meant. If they didn’t purify the bite with holy water, a painful process that would feel like pouring acid in the wound, Billy would be able to find him no matter where he was, and maybe even control him. Avoiding that was worth a little discomfort.

A half hour and two bottles of holy water later, the bite was officially clean, and no longer burned when the blessed liquid was poured over it. He sat huddled on the floor of the bathroom and relearned how to breathe.

Steve’s phone had, rather annoyingly, been ringing almost constantly through the entire process. Now that they were done, Nancy had gone to fetch it for him. It began to ring again as she re-entered the room.

It was the office calling, probably wondering if he was planning on showing up today after calling out the past two nights.

“Hello?”

“Steven, how kind of you to finally pick up the phone.”

Steve grimaced, It was his father, not the secretary he was expecting to deal with, fuck.

“Sorry, I was in the middle of something.” He weakly explained.

“Yes, it seems you’ve been very busy lately, which brings me to the reason for my call. I was just wondering if you were going to grace us with your presence tonight, or if you had another bullshit excuse for why you need to reschedule one of our most high-profile clients?” Bert sounded pissed.

“What high-profile client?” Steve asked.

“Mayor Kline, of course.”

“But his appointment isn’t for another two weeks?”

“He called this morning, said he needed to move it up. He wants his nephew raised as soon as possible, and for some reason insists you be the one to do it. You had an open timeslot this evening and I had no reason to refuse, so you better get your ass out to that cemetery by 9pm or so help me god you are fired.”

The cemetery wasn’t that far from the waffle house, if he was quick about it, he could make this work and not lose his main source of income.

“Fine.” Steve spat, before taking a deep breath and continuing on in a much calmer manner. “I mean yes, no problem. I will be there.”

“Good. And, Steven?”

“Hm?”

“I want to see you in my office tomorrow afternoon. We need to have a talk.”

“Can’t wait.” Steve snarked, hanging up before his dad could say anything more.

Nancy was gaping at him. “Did you really just take a job for tonight? Don’t we have more important things to worry about?”

Steve groaned, rubbing a hand over his face. “I didn’t really have a choice if I wanted to continue to be able to pay my rent. It’s fine, there's enough time to do both, as long as you don’t mind riding along to a zombie raising.”

Nancy shrugged. “Never seen that part of your work before, could be fun.”

-

It was 9:30, Steve and Nancy had been waiting graveside for over 45 minutes and it was becoming more obvious by the minute that his client wasn't going to show.

“We should just go.” Steve said.

“I thought you were worried about losing your job?” Nancy pointed out.

“Not my fault the guy didn’t show.”

Steve hoisted his work bag over his shoulder and bent to pick up the old dog crate that he used to transport the chickens. He wasn’t sure what to do with them now, he’d never had a client pull a no-show before. It was too hot to leave them in the car when they went to meet Gareth, granted they were intended to be used as a sacrifice, but suffocating to death in a hot car was too cruel. At least when he used them in the ritual their deaths were quick and painless.

He was considering opening the cage doors and letting them run free when he heard Nancy’s sharp intake of breath.

“Steve?” She whisper-shouted.

He followed her line of sight and spotted the problem. About 30 feet away a figure sat crouched between two headstones, staring at them. It had long black talons on its hands and feet, and Its mottled gray skin almost seemed to glow in the moonlight.

Steve froze, recalling the poor groundskeeper’s fate. If this creature was part of the pack that did that, they could be in trouble here.

“Nance, we need to get out of here, now.”

“What is that thing?” She asked, not taking her eyes off of it.

“A ghoul, and he’s probably not alone.”

“Are they dangerous?”

“Not usually, unless you’re injured, but I have reason to believe ghouls killed a groundskeeper here a few days ago, so I'm not taking any chances.”

The two of them started slowly backing up in the direction of his car, keeping the creature in sight the whole time, until a chittering sound from behind had them stopping in their tracks. Steve whirled, trusting Nancy to keep her eye on the other one, and found two more of them perched on the roof of his car. Shit.

“Would shooting them do any good?” Nancy asked, easing her hand towards the small of her back.

“They can only be killed by decapitation or fire, so, maybe with enough shots to the neck?” Steve replied, reaching under his arm for his own weapon.

Another figure stepped out from behind a tall monument, not far from the first ghoul. The man spoke loudly as he approached. “Keep those hands where I can see them, Mr. Harrington, Ms. Wheeler.”

It was Brenner, and he had a shotgun aimed right at Steve's chest.

Steve raised his hands, palms out, and Nancy followed suit. Two on one, he knew they could take the older man, but not if he took buckshot to the chest. The ghouls were a wildcard, but Steve had a sneaking suspicion. It hadn’t escaped his notice that the creatures never once looked in Brenner’s direction. Could he be controlling them somehow?

“I appreciate the fact that you haven’t yet told Billy about my…condition, but I can't take the risk that you won’t change your mind in the future.”

More ghouls spilled into the area as he spoke. There had to be at least 9 of them now.

Steve was confused to say the least. “Why would it matter if Billy found out? So you can’t raise the long-dead, who cares? You can still walk in the daylight, do his bidding. Shit, he’ll probablty like you better now, being that you are technically dead, it’s one more thing you two have in common besides being complete fucking assholes.”

Brenner laughed, which was not quite the response Steve was expecting.

“Ah, so I see you havn’t connected the dots yet. It seems I gave you too much credit, Mr. Harrington.”

Steve would like to say he figured it out right then on his own, but it wasn’t until the moonlight caught on the necklace peeking out through Brenners shirt that it dawned on him. The necklace. Magic that demanded a high cost. Like blood. Like death. No wonder he was afraid of Billy finding out his secret.

“You’re the vampire murderer. That’s how you feed the spell to keep you alive.”

“Precisely. Bit slow, but you got there.”

Steve scowled. “So what, you’re just going to shoot us?”

“Actually, I was planning on letting the ghouls have you. Better if it looks like a random attack. You understand.”

Steve flinched as Nancy’s shot rang out, she had taken advantage of the distraction of their conversation and drew her gun. The bullet hit Benner in the chest, causing him to drop his shotgun. He and Nancy tried to rush the man but several ghouls stepped in front of him, blocking their path, and any chance at getting another shot off.

“You afraid of a little pain, Brenner? You know the bullets can’t kill you, not with that thing around your neck.” Steve taunted.

“True enough, young man, but I don't know what would happen if I was shot in the head, and I have no intention of finding out.”

“How is it you’re controlling them?” Steve had to know, it’s not something he’d ever heard of.

Surprisingly, the other man answered. “I don’t really know. They started flocking to me when I came out of my grave and followed my orders with only the barest hint of my will forced upon them. It’s fascinating, really. They are useful little things.”

If the guy was going to be so generous with his answers, Steve figured he might as well keep going.

“I get why you killed the other vampires, you were doing what you had to do to stay alive, and Tommy had tormented you, but why kill the groundskeeper?”

Brenner shrugged. “I was trying out a few new techniques. Consider it target practice.”

“You son of a bitch, he was a human being! He was innocent, he didn’t deserve that.”

“And the vampires did?”

“I..I don’t know.” Certainly Tommy had, but what did Steve really know about the others?

“Hmm, someone is having a crisis of conscience. I wonder if that has anything to do with a certain dark haired master vampire, or perhaps the young Dustin who seems to love you so much.”

“Dustin?” Nancy gasped.

“Later.” Steve said to her before returning his attention back to Brenner. “Enough chatter, asshole. Stop hiding behind your minions and fight, unless you’ve decided to just talk us to death.”

“Unfortunately, I have somewhere to be. I’m sorry it had to be like this, truly.”

At his last words the ghouls surged towards them, covering Brenner’s escape.

Steve turned to Nancy, they needed to run, and fast, but she was busy rifling through her purse.

“Odd time to want to touch up your lipstick.” He said.

“Shut up” She murmured, finally coming up victorious with a lighter and a can of hairspray.

“What’s that for?” Steve asked, dumbfounded.

“Someone was never a Girl Scout”

Nancy stepped in front of him as she lit the lighter and sprayed the aerosol can, aiming the small improvised flamethrower at the closest of the creatures. They cowered away from the flames, and slowly but surely Nancy was able to clear them a path to the car.

“Scouts my ass.” Steve mumbled, rushing to the driver's seat and shoving the key into the ignition.

The spray sputtered and died just as Nancy bumped into the passenger door. She screamed, tossing the now empty can at the head nearest ghoul and throwing herself into the seat.

“Drive, Steve, Drive!”

He peeled out, sending dirt and rocks flying as he sped down the unpaved road that ran the length of the cemetery. The creatures pursued their car, but weren’t fast enough to keep up. By the time Steve turned onto the actual road, they were nothing but a spec in his rear view mirror.

Chapter 9

[torreshalstead]

20 hours

First fic for One Chicago Appreciation Week 2022 and Burzek Appreciation Week 2022! AO3 link

Prompts - Chills and ‘Why won’t you let me in? What are you afraid of?’

Summary - Those 20 hours in solitary had affected Adam more than he cared to let on and he was hiding it from everyone. But he works in an elite unit so people are bound to notice.

Notes - I played around with the timelines a bit but it’s set after the Season 2 episode ‘Prison Ball’ but includes elements of Season 5 as Hailey is present

Adam woke with a start. Breathing heavily, he ran his hands over his face in an attempt to wipe the sweat away, cool the chills and calm himself down. It had been 5 days since those 20 hours and he hadn’t slept through the night once. He looked to his right and breathed a sigh of relief to see Kim still sleeping soundly, curled on her side. At least he hadn’t woken her up he thought as he looked over at the clock. 3:38am. The earliest he could get into the bullpen without arising suspicion was 6, any earlier and people would start asking questions and this was not something he wanted to talk about.

Getting out of bed quietly so as not to wake his sleeping girlfriend, he walked into the kitchen. Coffee, that would ensure he stayed awake for the rest of the day and no one would know any different. Whilst waiting for the coffee machine to finish, he looked around. His once manly bachelor pad now bore signs of someone in a happy relationship. There were pictures on the fridge, cushions on the sofa, that Adam had no idea how they got there, and two glasses with the dregs of last night’s wine on the coffee table. Adam smiled to himself, even with everything going on in his head right now he still had her. She was the love of his life, for that he was sure and he knew he had to get over this, for her sake if not for his own.

-------

Dragging himself into the precinct at 6am was not what he had planned today yet here he was. He went straight into the break room to make another cup of coffee, it was going to be a long day. His phone chimed shortly after he returned to his desk – it was a picture of the note he had left Kim on her mug and a message saying I love you too. A small grin crept across his face.

‘What’s got you smiling like a fool’ came Kevin’s voice. Adam had been so preoccupied that he hadn’t even noticed him coming up the stairs.

‘Nothing’ Adam said.

‘Yeah nothing to rhyme with Burgess’ Kevin smirked.

If there was one person who understood the relationship he had with Kim, it was Kevin. The two hadn’t necessarily gotten off to the best start in relation to her but now Adam understood that he was only looking out for her, and he appreciated someone else having her back.

-------

By the time lunch came around, Adam was on his fourth cup of coffee and people were starting to notice his irritable behaviour. He had snapped at Jay when Jay asked what was wrong. Had barked orders at Hailey even though she outranked him. Al had called him out for zoning out during their meeting and Voight, well Voight could tell something was up.

‘Ruzek’, the gruff voice of their Sergeant said, ‘my office, now’. Adam groaned internally, getting called to the Boss’s office was never good news and he knew after the way he was behaving today, it definitely wasn’t.

‘Sarge’ he said when he entered the room and closed the door behind him.

‘You going to tell me what’s going on or do I have to drag Burgess up here and hear it from her’. Oh, great Adam thought, he thinks it’s my relationship that’s getting in the way of the job, whereas the relationship was the only thing keeping him afloat right now.

‘It’s nothing Sarge, and it’s got nothing to do with Kim, she’s great, I mean we’re fine. I just…’, he took a breath, ‘haven’t been sleeping great, think I just need a new pillow is all’ he said with a chuckle. Voight didn’t look convinced.

‘If that’s all, close the door on your way out’.

‘That’s all Sarge, I’m good’. And with that, he left Voight’s office and headed straight to the locker room. He sat down on the bench and put his head in his hands, I’ve got to get over this he thought. If not I’m out of intelligence and that can’t happen. Just as he was trying to pull himself together, he heard a voice.

‘Adam, hey, what’s up?’ He looked up to see Kim walk in, she looked concerned. ‘You didn’t text back this morning, I just wanted to check you’re alright. You’ve been gone every morning this week before I wake up’.

Adam rubbed his face, ‘I’m all good darlin’’ he said with his signature grin, ‘just had paperwork to catch up on’. And with that, he got up, quickly pecked her on the cheek and headed back to the bullpen, leaving a very confused and worried Kim in his wake.

-------

Adam was the last to leave the bullpen that evening and once he thought he was alone he headed back into the locker room. He knew Kim had gone home earlier; she had text him to say she was going to cook if he was home before 7. It was now 9 and he had shot her a message back to say the team had to stay late. In reality, Voight had a meeting in the Ivory tower at 5 and the rest of the team apart from him and Jay had left before 6. Jay had headed out a little while ago and he had just been staring at the screen until he thought he was alone. He knew Kim would probably be in bed by the time he got home which meant he could hopefully avoid the conversation he knew was coming.

When he got to the locker room however he saw that he wasn’t alone. Jay was sat on the bench waiting for him.

‘Ruze, talk to me man’.

‘It’s nothing Jay really, I’ve just not been sleeping, need a new pillow, you know the story’. He tried to play it off but he could see Jay wasn’t believing him.

‘That’s not it though is it’, Jay said in a slow calm voice. ‘You’ve been like this ever since that UC case. The one in the prison’.

Adam bristled, he wanted to say something, anything to deflect what Jay was saying but he couldn’t get the words out.

‘Going into the hole must have been hell man, I’ve heard the stories. It’s normal that it would have affected you. Hell, you’d be crazy if you didn’t get torn up over what you saw.’

Adam sat down facing his locker, not wanting to see Jay’s face.

‘I’ve seen the look in your eyes before’, Jay took a deep breath, ‘I’ve had that look in my eyes too. When every time you close them your back somewhere that broke you. It’s normal but you’ve got to get some help man. Have you told anyone the real reason you’re not sleeping?’ Adam shook his head. ‘Not even Burgess?’.

Adam scoffed. ‘What do I tell her? Hey Kim, you know your big strong cop boyfriend who’s not afraid of bullets. Well he got locked in a room for 20 hours and went almost crazy and now he can’t sleep because he keeps having nightmares.’

Jay looked at him slowly, ‘yes’ he said simply. ‘Tell her and she’ll be there for you. Hell that girl is crazy about you and heaven knows why’. He chuckled quietly. ‘You’ve got PTSD Adam, at least on some level’ he said as Adam looked at him and tried to interrupt. ‘20 hours locked in a room with no windows, hearing sounds of other prisoners going crazy, not knowing when you were going to get out. That’s a lot for anyone to take. Even a big strong cop’. He said with a smile. ‘I’ve known men bigger and stronger than you, crack under a lot less’.

‘But that’s different’ Adam said.

‘Why, because it was war. Men are men Adam, in prison, on the streets or on the battlefield. It doesn’t mean what we see or hear doesn’t affect us. You should talk to someone. When I had all that stuff with Morgan, therapy got me through it. Well therapy and Upton.’

Adam looked up at him with a curious expression.

‘Yeah, she basically told me if I didn’t go to therapy and start dealing with it, she was going to ask for another partner’.

‘Damn, for someone so small, she’s feisty’. Smirked Adam, Jay nodded and laughed.

‘She is, but it took that for me to realise that me not dealing with it wasn’t just effecting me. It was having an impact on those around me, those I care about.’

‘But therapy’ Adam said, ‘talking to someone about my feelings and crap, not sure that’s for me.’

‘I didn’t think it was for me either, thought I’d be weak if I went to see someone but it helped. It really did. But start with talking to Kim, she knows somethings up. We all do. And she might surprise you.’

With that Jay patted him on the shoulder and headed out leaving Adam with a lot to think about.

-------

Adam took a breath before opening the door to his apartment. She loved him, he thought to himself, she loved him.

As he walked in, Kim turned her head to see him from where she was sat on the couch. ‘You’re home late’, she said. It wasn’t said in an accusatory tone, it was laced with something else, worry, perhaps.

Adam took of his jacket and draped it over a chair before making his way to sit next to her.

‘Talk to me Adam’, Kim said softly as she took his hands in hers. ‘Why can’t you let me in? What are you so afraid of?’.

This was it thought Adam, this is the moment I might lose her. And with that he started talking. Once he had opened the flood gates, it didn’t seem like he’d ever stop.

He told her how he hadn’t been sleeping because every night it felt like he was lying on that hard slab and all he could hear was the shouts coming from the neighbouring cells. He told her how he felt like he’d been in that room for days and when it turned out it was only 20 hours he was ashamed of how he felt. He told her when Kevin seemed fine straight afterwards that he must be weak for acting the way he was. He told her that he didn’t want her to think less of him because he was having nightmares so he made sure she fell asleep before he even dared to close his eyes. He told her how Jay had cornered him this evening and told him to talk to her and that maybe he should get some therapy. He told her how he had scoffed at the idea because good cops don’t need therapy. He told her how the reason he hadn’t told her any of this was because he was scared. He was scared she would look at him with pity, scared that she would think he was weak, scared that she’d leave him.

All through this, Kim watched him whilst he talked, holding his hands but never interrupting. She knew he had to get it all out and when it seemed like he had finished, she gently squeezed his hand and he looked at her.

But it wasn’t a look of pity that Adam saw, it was a look of love, a look of pride.

‘It took a lot to tell me all that Adam’, Kim smiled, ‘I always thought you were the strongest man I’d ever met’. Adam heard the past tense and looked away. Kim squeezed his hand again and he looked back. ‘But now I realise that you’re stronger than I ever thought and I love you more because of it.’

Adam had tears in his eyes and let out a weak laugh.

‘And we will get through this together, and if you want to go to talk to someone then…’. Adam interrupted her, ‘I do’ he said. ‘I think it’ll help’. She smiled, ‘then I will drive you to the appointments and wait until you’re finished. Then we can come home together, and talk about it, or not if that’s what you want, but we will do it together.’

Adam’s smile became even larger as he wrapped her into a hug and gently squeezed. How did I get to be so lucky he thought as he held the woman of his dreams and realised that tonight, he might actually get to sleep through the night, for the first time since that hideous day.

[springtrappd]

not trying to sound rude or aggressive or anything i swear, but what exactly Is it abt like. eclipse and ruin in general that you have critiques of? i'm still trying to figure out exactly what i think of it myself - it wasn't ANYTHING like what i was expecting, and to be perfectly honest i was also one of the Book Doubters(trademark pending) so that was a huge culture shock to me as well. idk i go in-between being really impressed and really liking it, to being salty that it wasn't what I think a good chunk of ppl including myself were expecting? looks like there's gonna be more down the line as far as this SB storyline goes so i'm curious and cautiously optimistic. i'm not totally sold on the mimic yet but thats probably bc I haven't been reading the tales books. guess i should start now lmao

i should make it clear that i actually haven't finished ruin yet, which is why i've been holding back on talking about it -- i'm up to bonnie bowl! so i'll refrain from commenting on that, except to say that the gameplay is a massive improvement from sb and only has more minor design flaws vs the base game's... fundamentally broken, lmao. they listened to criticism, refined their ideas and executed them with the resources available, and they did it well! i have mostly positive things to say on that front, which is nice. :)

eclipse is harder to talk about because... like, to give you an idea of how badly it effected me: it pissed me off so bad i started dissociating for the rest of the night, gave me stress stomach-aches when I refused to stop playing and then woke me up at 6am this morning nauseous and in pain. and that's not me being a wimp, that's me experiencing somatization, which is a real thing that i struggle with a lot, so hopefully you can understand why I'm not exactly keen to talk about this? especially when literally every time i even try to someone gets mad at me for breathing. please keep this in mind as i go on to say: eclipse is ableist as fuck and completely inexcusable.

as presented within ruin's visit to the daycare, the dca is left in a state of disrepair after the earthquake and subsequent abandonment left the pizzaplex to fend for itself. they're trapped between their two personalities, with both of them insisting that they are the one who knows what they should do; sun wants to be a good boy and do arts and crafts and whatever, and moon wants to send everyone to bed, blah blah you know the drill. as you complete the segment sun and moon regularly argue with each other, with sun holding the upset moon back from attacking cassie as she reactivates the generators, turning the lights on and stunning moon long enough for her to whack him with the faz-wrench, forcing a system reboot... and he's immediately reborn as eclipse, a lovely and kind figure with no memories of anything that happened who gently escorts you out and wishes you well. he's fixed now, you see! you did it! you got rid of his evil split personality, you've made him normal again, and without the aberration that is plurality he has not a cruel bone in his body!

the implications of this are incredibly fucking obvious and deeply deeply upsetting, and why i'm gonna point-blank say i'm not entertaining further discourse over whether this is reaaaally ableist or if they reaaaaally meant for them to read as a system or... nope, it's done, we're not fucking going there. it doesn't matter what they intended -- what they intended is pretty obvious, actually; they've decided to tackle a subject they're incredibly ill-equipped to handle, and the result is a character -- descended from the visual language and cultural canon of tales like split and psycho -- whose arc concludes with the reveal that it was being a system that made them violent. and the boss fight was dumb and bad and ignored all the previously-explained mechanics of this character to do this. it is aggressively stupid fanservice that turns what was once simply "poor taste walking the line of good faith" into "actual offensive caricature with zero room for doubt", and the only thing more despair-inducing than this twist is the community of people gleefully eating it up as their yummy angst fuel for their ultimate comfort character. and i shouldn't be surprised, considering it's coming from the "how dare you ask me to examine why i find it scary when the dca experiences altered identity states" crowd, but i am, unfortunately, an idealist doomed to be let down by normies. huzzah.

as for the mimic: I'm perfectly fine with afton getting laid to rest (he deserves it!), I'm not one of those guys, but in its current iteration (and from my understanding of it) it suffers immensely from having literally zero reason to be doing any of this shit and being yet another rejection of the supernatural in favour of sci-fi bullshit. because it's from the novels and the novels are allergic to ghosts. and having your entire story drip-fed in mediocre spin-off novels filled with blatant fetish content marketed to naive twelvies is so obviously bad storytelling that i don't even think i need to get into the piss-poor prose and legitimately cruel messages to explain why i hate that one

[whentherewerebicycles]

snuggly little girl is finally allowed back into the bed after several weeks of being banished due to houseguests :) she is very warm and sleepy and happy about it.

it’s an overcast morning and I woke up feeling bleh but I’m trying to acknowledge the feeling and not get stuck in it. I am working from home today and my tasks are a little ill-defined so I do need to make sure I get up, get dressed, and sit at a desk at some point to ensure I actually focus. here’s what I’d like to do:

7:30-8:30 coffee, lounge, work from bed

8:30 get up and get dressed

8:30-11:30 work session

11:30-12:30 shower/get ready

1-2 ND mtg

2-4 windshield appt—second work session. call Cigna while waiting, finish other work tasks, schedule-send emails to four faculty for next week, make a plan for next week

4-5ish wrap up work if needed

walk the dogs… it’s time to get back into it. I have a hockey podcast to listen to and can start with an easy 40-45 min loop

eat leftovers for dinner & make cold brew to steep overnight

finish ninth house (I’m powering through but letting myself skim the boring parts)

bed by 10 (I’m slowly trying to reset my sleep/wake times to 9:15pm/5:30 or 6am)

okay. I also am open to doing some work over the weekend if 1) it’s fun, and 2) it consoles me (as it often does lol). but here are the things I want to prioritize in today’s work sessions:

review makerspace brainstorming notes and distill conversation into a core list of ideas

organize list by priorities (immediate, academic year, future/aspirational)

figure out some way of annotating priority list. I want to identify the big steps each one would take to research/create/implement, note who on the team we could delegate specific pieces of the work to, and identify the other people or units on campus we’d want to partner with. this will be so fun.

JG asked if I could give an overview of my big priorities for my program next year so he could better understand how this initiative fits into those priorities. I think that’s a great ask and a great opportunity for me to sit down and synthesize what I’ve learned in my first month in the role. one big amorphous thing I’m tasked with is increasing the number of faculty who are incorporating research into their courses, and I was thinking the other day that instead of trying to do this across all majors in a scattershot way, I could use this makerspace access initiative as a focusing lens for that work this year. and then since that project is naturally STEM + business-leaning, maybe I can look for a manageably sized humanities initiative to take on next year too, so there’s a good balance within my portfolio of projects. anyway I think I’m at the point where I have talked to enough people and said yes or tentatively yes to enough things that I am ready to sit down and start drawing up a summer + academic year plan. also I’m not quite there yet but I might almost be ready to start mapping out the calendar so I can do some initial thinking in that direction today if I feel like it. oh and I want to make a note for myself to look for specific areas where I can consult or bring in the person in our office who was handling aspects of my job for a long time before I started… I feel like I can bulldoze a bit when I’m enthusiastic about an idea or project and I don’t want her to feel like I’m undoing all the work she put into building programming etc. so I want to really consciously build in checkpoints where I’m asking for her feedback or drawing on her expertise in a substantive/meaningful way so she doesn’t feel like I swept in and changed everything to fit my own vision.

meet with ND to gather info about student employee development redesign (then spend time updating my earlier notes)

I don’t think I’ll get much deeper into the student worker redesign project today but it might be a thing I block off time for this weekend or next week.

schedule four emails to faculty/staff (should include YP, DH, MK, and maybe BW?)

I think that’s good!! wow and just working on a work plan for today has already put me in a much better & more hopeful mood. time to get started!