#to everything he ever hated.’ …like guys why are we saying he doesnt hate him at all

[artheresy]

My dynamic for Dan Feng & Yingxing

Hi hello, I said I would finally post this after long debating over if I show it here first or in my fic first, but fuck it. That’s a long ways away and I need to rant about them because they take up too much space in my brain.

So this post, isn’t me claiming that this is the canon dynamic between Dan Feng and Yingxing or that this is the only right one or whatever. This is purely my own view of what I think their dynamic would be based upon how I see their individual characters with the little bits and crumbs we’ve been given so far in HSR. I can’t go over every single aspect of them here because I just purely can’t think of every single thing so this is primarily going to be talking about the fundamental key parts of my interpretation of their dynamic! If that makes sense, I’ll hop right in

Be warned, this is pretty fucking long, I think so much about them it actually hurts me physically, like it’s painful. This is me just letting my autism run while talking about two of my favorites, so be cautious… sorry in advance if some areas turn into tangents, again I think about them so much its actually too much I think about them too much

AGAIN, THIS IS MY VIEW OF THEM!! Based on the characterization we have so far which isn’t a whole bunch, this is my interpretation of their relationship based on how I view the bits of characterization we have and what we know about them

—

Okay so one of the biggest and most fundamental parts that influences how I view their dynamic and the course of their relationship is looking at how exactly and why exactly I think they became close. Jingliu in her companion quest says:

I think this statement she makes “to see someone so arrogant get along with someone so proud” is actually the foundation of why they get close and their dynamic works rather than an obstacle that they somehow overcome. Specifically, I think that it was Yingxing’s arrogance (partially genuine and partially a habit born for the sake of his own survival) that allowed the two of them to get close. When we see lines from Yingxing via Dan Heng’s memories or via the Mirage Echo, though he uses Dan Feng’s proper title, he seems to talk rather casually to him. Even in a tense situation as secretly being in Scalegorge Waterscape for research would seem, Yingxing still is very lighthearted and in some languages, even laughs a little as he banters with Dan Feng. I have my own headcanons for why he has this casualness to him, but either way it’s a genuine part of him and a part of his canon characterization. I think that casualness, a product of his confidence/arrogance and maybe a little of his obliviousness as well, allows for them to get close. It evens the playing field, Yingxing sees Dan Feng as his equal, as a person, as Dan Feng rather than as his position of Imbibitor Lunae High Elder of the Vidyadhara. I could speculate all day whether or not other people had treated him similarly before and he shot it down (there’s a lot of the actual evolution of the dynamic that I will write I swear), but I think there was something very unique in that casualness that Dan Feng might not have experienced before, not from anyone else, not from the other members of the HCQ he had met before. Perhaps even Yingxing’s background would play a part in how shocked by his behavior DF is. Either way, it is that casualness, that equalness unlike he had ever experienced before, mixed with all of Yingxing’s other characteristics such as his cheeky nature that manages to quickly break down Dan Feng’s walls and make him feel compelled to grow closer to YX. Whether their first meeting was via Baiheng and Jingliu or a chance encounter before they eventually join the HCQ, Dan Feng is coming away from that shell shocked by the sheer audacity of this short life species, feelings he first interprets as offense before he realizes he’s actually amused/interest in him, and Yingxing walking away like “Huh? That was the High Elder I guess. Seems nice, a bit stiff tho!” There is no worship of Dan Feng from his side for any reason, not for his skills, not for his position, not even as an unattainable ethereal beauty situation. He views him as just another person, an equal, and no part of him views DF in this cocky “he’s not unattainable bc I already have him” kind of way because…

—

Another fundamental in my personal interpretation of their relationship is that Yingxing doesn’t truly seek anything from Dan Feng nor does he ever necessarily try to pursue him. And all of this isn’t in an insecure “We’d never work” kind of product of overthinking way of choosing not to pursue him. Rather, it’s primarily because Yingxing doesn’t feel the need to. He doesn’t need his romantic feelinhs to be satisfied or fulfilled especially with the difference in their lifespans. As long as he can be by his side and stay close with him until his time comes to an end, Yingxing is truly perfectly content with that. A lot of this additionally stems from a certain place. That being that after he gets to know Dan Feng better and learns of the sheer pressure he endures due to his position, the choices he feels he’s forced into, the level of restriction, even with all of the influence Dan Feng still has, he doesn’t want to be an added source of pressuring or discomfort. To sum it up, Yingxing leaves the ball in Dan Feng’s court so he can act as he sees fit when he feels like it. There’s an added layer to this also of Yingxing not wanting to ruin the current state of their dynamic (a topic I’ll get into more). In the end, this is just yet another part of Yingxing that utterly pulls Dan Feng in. He is very used to being distrusting of others and refusing to get close to many people, primarily out of wariness of the potential ulterior motives people may have when befriending him. Contrastly, Yingxing doesn’t expect or even want anything from Dan Feng even the closer they get. Dan Feng can see that, and it makes him trust in Yingxing. Makes him trust to the point that he feels comfortable enough to make attempts pursuing Yingxing himself rather than meeting at a stalemate, refusing to go after a man Dan Feng knows won’t chase him as to not risk pressuring him and bc he’s fine with how things are. That isn’t to say though that Yingxing won’t respond to any attempts Dan Feng makes first though, because he absolutely will. Well… that is if he can recognize any attempts from Dan Feng at all because he can be rather oblivious in the face of people making advances at him-

An added part to all of this is that Yingxing with the way he acts, both in general and in this specific regard, ends up being part of what helps influence and encourage Dan Feng to do more to take what he wants, actually follow his desires in certain aspects rather than keeping up his stiff outer image and denying himself of everything for that sake of his position. The HCQ in general all have influence helping Dan Feng open up more like this, seizing things instead of either waiting for things on a platter or never having them. However, Yingxing's bold nature is definitely the strongest factor as he ends up helping Dan Feng learn to identify what he wants for himself. Whether that want is something as complex as moving forward in a relationship when not only has Dan Feng had very little experience with close connections to others, but also is so accustomed to the stillness of long life, or something as simple as taking breaks and time to himself to live and breathe and experience life moving around him. It's through Yingxing (and the rest of the HCQ) that Dan Feng learns to be more selfish. It's through all of their care and kindness and love that Dan Feng learns that he too is not merely a pillar to stand tall for his people. That he is a person with needs and wants, and it is perfectly fine to be selfish and prioritize yourself at times.

—

So that previous section got into a little bit of Dan Feng’s trust in Yingxing, but what about Yingxing’s side of things? What about his trust in Dan Feng? I dunno what it is about him, but I feel like Dan Feng is the kind of person who can hear some of the deepest confessions and see the barest parts of the heart of someone he cares about and not treat them any differently like as if they are fragile y’know. Like Dan Feng is the person who Yingxing, out of all the HCQ, can truly confide in because he knows he won’t be seen different or treated in a drastically different way. Ultimately, Jingliu isn’t someone he feels he can go to for super emotional things which she likely herself knows she wouldn’t be able to help much with, Jing Yuan and him have a very light hearted joking dynamic that makes changing the tone and breaking the mood for a deep heart to heart much harder so he doesn’t often do it, and Baiheng… well, deep down Baiheng still sees Yingxing as that disheartened little boy, who had lost everything and was being told that there’s nothing he could do about it given his lifespan, that he couldn’t avenge what he had lost. If Yingxing were to tell her how he honestly truly feels about everything in his life, the traumas he still hadn’t overcome or the thoughts that plague him every day, he knows she would end up fretting over him, mother hen style. Being overly cautious as if his mind is made of glass, and as much as he loves her, he hates the idea of her changing how she treats him because of just how much she cares for him in turn.

(It’s a trait I see Baiheng having as to it being an obstacle in her other relationships like with Yingxing but works well in her relationship with Jingliu, caring for her and treating her softly, not underestimating her, in a way that others are too afraid to treat the unwavering, ice cold Sword champion! Matching DF and YX’s whole situation with his arrogance and casualness)

In the end, Yingxing feels like Dan Feng is the only one he can truly trust with the deepest corners of his heart and mind without worrying of Dan Feng either judging him or suddenly treating him like a fragile piece of porcelain. Even if he were to take note of something Yingxing told him and do something in response perhaps to ease his worries or heart ache, it would never be something out of pity or thinking Yingxing to be unable to take care of himself. Because ultimately, that’s where this all stems for Yingxing. He has lived so much of his life underestimated, whether having his skills and abilities questioned for being a short life species or sometimes intentionally sometimes unintentionally having his ability to take care of himself questioned like he needs a caretaker. Something that again is partially due to again to being a short life species. What Yingxing likes about Dan Feng is from the moment he met him, he doesn’t feel as if he is being questioned or underestimated. Dan Feng makes him feel as if he is truly seen as an equal, even with their distinct difference in power. It’s a treatment from Dan Feng that serves as a response to Yingxing’s own treatment of Dan Feng, his casualness to the other man making it clear he sees him as an equal as well.

And that? Well that is perhaps the most important part of the dynamic. In canon, they both have struggles with how they are seen and treated by others based on preconceived notions about their status. Dan Feng being in a way dehumanized as he is put up on a pedestal for being an incarnation of Imbibitor Lunae, for being the High Elder of the Vidyadhara, a position that he wants to escape because of the sheer loss of identity just a role brings. Yingxing being underestimated from the moment he stepped onto the Xianzhou because he wasn’t a long life species to the point that the other celestial masters on the Zhuming borderline bullied him into doubting himself, thinking a lot about his own death, and as a young boy (not even a teen yet), literally saying “Maybe I’ll never live to see the day my parents are avenged.” In my view of them, for them to truly be as close as they are established in canon, I think that from the start of their dynamic they make it very clear they see the other as a genuine and true equal in a way that other people haven’t or perhaps, can’t fully.

—

I said this before my in Aurizzm Yingxing post, but yeah, I don’t think Dan Feng or Yingxing would have come into a romantic relationship with each other with any experience at all. I know Dan Feng with no experience is a very accepted idea, and I agree with it very much given his isolated position and his proud attitude and that 100% plays into my view of their dynamic. I also however, firmly believe Yingxing came in without any romantic relationship experience too. The difference here ends up being in how inexperienced each of them are. Yingxing has had a lot more friendship experience, and he’s experienced crushes before which is how he can identify his own romantic feelings better than Dan Feng. But he’s never actually been in any relationship. He’s never had the time, he’s got his own goals in mind while being painfully aware he’s on a time limit, and let’s be real like I said before, This Man is married to his Forge. Meanwhile, Dan Feng truly hasn’t had any friendships prior to the HCQ. Knowing him and her too, I firmly believe Dan Feng and Jingliu’s relationship for example, was for maybe a few decades, maybe a literal century, just them sparring without words from time to time. So Dan Feng not only going in with no friendship experience, but I think that man also is having to recognize some new emotions and feelings he’s never experienced nor can put words to. So Dan Feng’s disaster comes in being painful aware of the presence and intensity of his own feelings… he just doesn’t have the words nor experience to recognize exactly what those feelings are. It’s an absolute disaster on all fronts, somebody pray for the HCQ who unfortunately have to experience all of this.

There’s an added layer I want to go more into looking back at the first part of why their relationship works and the thing I said about the Baiheng trait. As we saw with Jingliu admitting to her feelings towards his attitude as a child, she wasn’t… she wasn’t really a fan so to say of his arrogance. And given y’know, what we see of the people of the Luofu, I don’t doubt many people have similar reactions. Part of Yingxing’s limited experience comes not only from his own decision to not pursue anything, I think part of it comes from being for whatever reason feeling distaste for him. Whether it’s their own prejudices against Outworlders, or his bold attitude and lack of formality that makes any interest they had in him end up flying away. Which ugh, makes it even more special that this attitude of his, born out of necessity for his own survival on the Xianzhou and for his ability to move forward in his craftsmanship after all he went through, which has pushed so many people away, ends up being the exact thing that allows him to get close to Dan Feng. IT’s UGGGHHH Sorry, but I just need to scream. I NEED TO SCREAM ABOUT THEM OKAY?? THEY TAKE UP TOO MUCH SPACE IN MY BRAIN, I CAN’T HAVE A SINGLE MOMENT OF REST BECAUSE OF THEM

—

Again, this is my view of them and their dynamic based upon what we have been given in game so far, the crumbs of characterization we have. God I hope we get more. This isn’t me saying this view of them is canon or anything, this is just how I view them. This is the dynamic and thoughts that have grown like mold in my head from thinking about them WAY too much.

I have so much more I could talk about, certain specific things or things that don’t even immediately come to mind right now. If you want to ask more about how I view them or have some topic or aspect of them in mind, please hit me up. Either send something to my inbox or bust your way into my dms to talk about them. I love them so much. They mean the world to me.

And honestly? I could just make two whole separate posts also just about how I specifically characterize each of them, but I think I need to let my brain rest a bit.

And don’t think about this dynamic specifically in reference to how it could reflect on their current selves because you might just end up hurting yourself like I have. GOD I HATE THEM

[crumb-crumblet-s-crumbington]

hello! i’m love your post and arts so much! I look at your posts after a hard day and my mood immediately changes to excellent. can I ask a couple of questions?

which pairing with Ethan do you prefer?

and… can we get to know you better? a little biography?

Thank you for your time! I'll be waiting for new arts! (sorry if i made mistakes, my english is not so good. im russian)

i like basically every ship with ethan! it mostly depends on the mood im in, but if im being honest, mithan, winterfield, and wintersberg gets frustrating to think about because they all dont treat ethan well canonically... lethan is fun because they have never met and i can make my own assumptions!

i used to like wintersberg the most and i still do like it, i just have expanded my horizons to other ships as well...., its mostly like a punchline to me though. they have the funniest potential which is why a majority of their posts is just joke comics. i do not like how people try to erase how karl is arrogant and egotistical tho. thats like removing the flavor.... the way karl acts is just very funny to me, hes so lame in a good way and i like how everytime he talks to ethan it sounds like hes twirling his hair and kicking his feet. canonically speaking, karl was very much in the wrong for trying to use rose and not elaborating and i will die on this hill. ethan is not in the wrong for being disgusted and angry that karl would ever try and propose that in the deal. karl is very arrogant so when ethan says no to him it makes him mad and he tries to use fear to get ethan to take his deal (kicking his chair and warning him) i like karl, i like how messed up and arrogant he is but i dislike how people try to portray him as a nice guy. however, in a AU where everythings the same except he doesnt try to use rose i do enjoy the dynamic they could have, especially if the teamed up (not with the deal where they use rose. ethan wouldnt agree unless karl never involved rose in the first place). karl is just a very entertaining character and i like him a lot, hes funny and his personality can be extremely hilarious

mia and ethan is pretty tragic and thinking about it too much makes me a bit sad, imo in a reality where ethan survives re8, he needs to divorce mia. im not saying ethan needs to hate mia and never talk to her again i just dont think they should be so intimate together because of her behavior... please do not take this as anti mia. they loved each other dearly but it wasnt healthy. their relationship was kept afloat by lies and mia doesnt change even though she deals with the consequences of her own actions in re7. she actively tries to hide her past from ethan and is mostly focused on trying to move on and have a normal life even if ethan will have to live the rest of his life in the dark.

she loves her family so much, shes very afraid of them leaving her so she hides all the bad things in the hopes that they wont leave. its selfish, its human, its real, her character is so amazing and i love her. she doesnt learn from re7 and hides important information from ethan again. i geniunly think they should have gotten divorced after re8 if ethan had survived. its tragic and its sad but they love each other so much. it sad because they both geniunly love rose so much but they themselves shouldnt be together. its just sad to think about it. whenever i draw them it usually takes place before re7. they should have divorced on good terms and shared custody of rose.........

ethan and chris is also frustrating to think about... chris is a major jerk in re8, whenever i draw it, its under a unspoken AU that chris did not behave the way he did in re8. his weird behavior in re8 is probably for a meta reason imo. capcom wanted to set up a twist villian so they make chris very vague and unesscarily cruel. while its frustrating that they turned chris into a jerk for the sake of a twist, it still happens in canon and i will forever roll my eyes whenever i see him on screen. he did what he thought was best but imo, execution matters more than the intentions. same applies to mia. they both did things that hurt ethan because they thought it would be the best but in the end they just hurt ethan.

all the ships ive discussed with people ethan has met canonically just makes it look like i dont even like the ships... LOL ... ethan just has horrible luck with the people he meets i guess... but i do enjoy the ships and drawing them, but again all of them come with the canon baggage that ends up making me sad because everyone treats ethan poorly whether they had good intentions or not

which is why leon and ethan is the most fun to draw without getting stressed... LOL... they have never met but just drawing what i think their dynamic would be like is very fun.

please dont take this post personally, this isnt a post declaring why ur fave ship sucks, this is just my own personal preferences and in the end i draw all of them anyways

if i had to rank the ships based on drawing silly comics it would be

wintersberg

mithan

lethan

winterfield

wintersberg has the funniest potential just because of karl and mithan can be funny if u water it down to "i love my wife so much" and said wife comes home with suspicious amounts of hard cash

i enjoy making joke comics far to much

if i were to rank the ships based on how healthy they would actually be for ethan it would be

lethan

winterfield, mithan, wintersberg (no particular order)

sorry 😭

leon and ethan have literally never met but imo it would still be the healthiest because ethan gets to start new

the three other ships r all unhealthy in some way, at least canonically without changing much about the characters (i do like winterfield but just because of how chris behaved in re8 it knocked them down)

i cant even rank them on personal preference because my opinion changes so often 😭 it changes based on discussions i have with my friends or recent art i see that inspires me... me and my friends recently had a discussion about mia and ethans relationship which made me very frustrated and sad with mia so i defiently wouldnt be drawing them anytime soon... meanwhile i hvae been talking to a friend who really likes winterfield often so the conversations we have give me art ideas and i end up drawing it more. if a friend of mine really enjoyed wintersberg or lethan and talked to me about it often id probably start drawing it more, the joys of being a multishipper

it changes a lot based on how im feeling and if im in the mood to draw something funny or something serious

sorry u asked a really simple question and i responded with a essay

and a little bit about myself is that i go by crumb, i am 18 and i go by all pronouns and prefer it/its

im vietnamese and live in texas

i made this tumblr acc solely so i could post my ethan art and im a re7/re8 girly so if ur here waiting for me to draw the re1-re6 characters im sorry u should probably expect nothing

i also make personal animations sometimes which u can find here

thanks for the ask and sorry for the rant!

[payasita]

Good job getting ADHD medication! I’m so proud of you :D

thanks so so much im very happy and so hopeful for the first time maybe ever but also it TOOK ME LIKE. A YEAR. A YEAR.

like yall for real?? for real. for real i have been diagnosed since i was like six. (funny story my teacher thought i was on the spectrum so my parents get me tested with the nodes and shit and according to mom, who loves this story, my neurologist did all that and talked to me and then just turned to my mom and went "she's not autistic. she just hates the other kids" but they DID find an adhd diagnosis in there so net win for all of us)

diagnosed since i was SIX. on stimulants until i turned 8, and you know why i got off em? my pediatrician retired. we could not find another who would take our low-income insurance. so i just had to rawdog The Rest Of My Fucking Life. diagnosed when i was six. legally neurodivergent for 20 slutty slutty angry years.

and it still took me like. a few months to get a psych appointment. a few weeks to reaffirm my diagnosis as an adult. a few more weeks for another appointment for meds. he doesnt Want to do meds first, because i must have been doing fine without them if its been two decades, right? i got a job and a car and everything. well gee fuckin shittickers Dr. Brain Guy, just WHAT was my alternative? would you prefer i be maladapted to the point of incapacitation; is that what it takes for someone to be considered? i cheated my way through school. every day after work i sit for an hour in my car because i dont have the executive function to stand up and walk the ten steps to my house. garbage just appears around me. i have three empty bags of hot chip and two cans of sprite on my desk as we speak, neither from today. at that point i hadnt had a debit card for six months because that would have required me to Drive To The Bank, a location that was new to me in this area, so i just did everything on credit. is this all normal? is this fine? am i GOOD, actually, Dr. WeirdBrain?

so we cordially agree that yes i should probably be medicated. i want to do a stimulant. he does not want to put me on a stimulant. "stimulants can mess with your heart," he says, "and you're young, you don't want heart problems." i say ok because i dont want to make him think im just looking for narcotics. even though i am. because they WORK. i agree to try some kind of antidepressant.

the antidepressant gives me tachycardia. i go to the emergency room after reading a heartbeat of, oh, 140 bpm, which is about like double what it normally is and juuuust below the You Are Having A Heart Attack threshold. i get to the ER and the doctor there is very obviously convinced i'm a local addict having some sort of episode. it is the most ironic experience i've had all year and i feel an abrupt and all consuming kinship with those birds in australia that will swoop you and peck at your face for seemingly no good reason.

so yeah, we narrow it down to the antidepressant. as it turns out, these particular meds are known to, semi-commonly, Mess With Your Heart. i have my next appointment with my psych and somehow refrain from pecking his eyes out. he puts me on a noreprinephrine inhibitor(iirc) that isnt actually FDA approved to treat ADHD specifically(i DEFINITELY rc) but it IS given to smokers to help them quit. i dont smoke. i may very well fucking start before this whole ordeal is at the point where someone listens to me

it obviously does a combined total of jack and shit, and the man waffles with this one because he has "had success" using it as treatment for other ADHD patients. he ups the dose. twice. three months on the smoker meds, which are also apparently notorious for destroying your appetite, but they didnt even do THAT. no change to the average amount of hot chip on my desk.

he wants to try quelbree after that. i finally tell him i'm tired of this shit and would like to have more than two hours of usable daylight to function before it all falls to uncontrollable youtube shorts binges and a daily experience i like to call The Weighted Nothings and i would very much like to PLEASE. TRY A STIMULANT.

he's been friendly enough with me over these past four or five or whatever months but at this he gets suddenly very very business-baseline. gives me the whole spiel about the north american shortage. gives me a spiel about how i absolutely cannot, under any circumstances, lose or sell this medication, because they will not refill it if i do. i am sitting here wondering if he he's telling the truth about having other ADHD patients at all like ever in his career, and also, am i nuts or should the "don't sell your prescription drugs" bit apply to EVERYTHING? i dont fuckin know man i just live here

he says he wants a urine test first. its scheduled for two weeks out. i take it.

"hey uh, your piss came back with cannabis in it" "well it'd be weirder if it didn't, we are in california and i am a kitchen manager" "you can't have weed if you want adderall" "fine i'll stop" "we'll schedule you another test in a month" "aight bet" it didnt go exactly like that but this is kind of what the vibe between us has devolved into by this point.

anyway i wait a month and get a good grade in piss. i get the meds prescribed. i go to fill out the prescription

all i really need to say to you are the words "prior authorization error" for most of you to get what happened next.

the psych isnt even aware. i wait another month for our next meeting, which was yesterday. i do not yell at him. he tells me to take it up with the pharmacy, and yell at them. i am going to yell at them.

so i go, and guess what, it actually went through a while ago! NO ONE TOLD ME OR DR. FEEL-BAD OVER HERE. but we can't fill it right now because its a controlled substance so come back in a few hours. hey it's ready where the hell are you? TAKE YOUR METH AND GET OUT

anyway i started it today, reorganized my pantry, and fixed the fire alarm in my hallway that's been chirping at me for a week. i no longer have to wear earplugs to bed.

and with my newfound executive function superpowers, i will be spraying my weed-free piss all over Reagan's grave.

[prosciuttoon]

Toshiro/Shuro is overhated

(mirror of my thread on twitter)

ever wanted to talk abt something so bad but u have so many thoughts so u cant even begin to organize a sentence. thats me abt shuro and its why i cant give my thoughts on him. i NEED to get this out of my system bc its takign up so much memory in my brain i need that space for thinking.

so i was really surprised to find so much hate for him even tho he seems pretty normal and rational out of the whole cast. ive deducted that its mostly abt his laios fight and that the ppl who hate him probably had bad experiences w social cues and relationships w neurotypicals bc of that. theres no way to avoid it bc its pretty much Right In Your Face that laios is ND. but thats not the only factor in why their relationship is rocky. its also the culture barrier. u have to understand toshiro was raised as JAPANESE NOBILITY ofc he would be a little conservative

also culture shock. idk if u know this but jp culture is very Mind Your Own Business like a lot of other asian cultures . ofc hes gonna be weirded out by a stranger invading his space. also his names not even Shuro. its just yt ppl not pronouncing his name right and settling for whats easiest.

img src: fan translation by savaralyn2 , i think its from the adventurers bible Complete Edition bc i dont remember it in the old one

ok you get the gist of the culture aspect of it. lets go into the ND/NT clash aspect of it. yes i understand its pretty hurtful to never be told when youre acting inappropriately. i am autistic too lmao. but you have to understand that shiro is one guy and he even does realize that repressing things is one of his fatal flaws. again. asian culture. non confrontational. that sorta thing. but these are genuine frustrations. if i were him id be annoyed too but id speak out about it. set boundaries. bc im blunt. shiros not. he was taught crazy strict manners (hierarchies, respect, politeness, etc).

his problem isnt ableism its a culmination of culture barriers, how he was raised to behave, and terrible lack of communication as thing caused by "all of the above" plus he just generally keeps to himself a lot which means repressing frustrations that will explode leading to a pathetic fistfight while hes starved, exhausted, and dehydrated. also. if he was ableist he would hate laios. he doesnt hate laios. at the end of the day, they are friends. NT and ND ppl can be friends u know. there will be rifts (like their fight) but you just have to communicate misunderstandings. theyre gonna be fine lol

anyways that was my whole spiel abt it. i think i got everything out that i wanted to? my head still feels a little full so i may add more later when i remember something

also i think its a little unfair to rule out the possibility of laios and him just being 2 very different kinds of ND bc its very common for misunderstandings to occur even then. EVERYONE IS DIFFERENT BUT WE NEED TO COMMUNICATE TO UNDERSTAND EACH OTHER! but for the sake of interpreting the Fight as a commentary on NT social rules and ND frustration, ill say toshiros NT. will we ever know? hes so far in the sidelines... youd really have to dig in the extra content to see the intricacies of his character.... please give him a chance

[ganondoodle]

im pretty sure i mentioned all these things before but its too late to start drawing anything and each time i see someone talk about totk i just get sad and frustrated again

literally by FAR the biggest problem about totk is that it REFUSES to connect to botw in any way beyond reusing the same map and character models, and even taking the things botw had established and ruin them entirely

ancient hero? BAM weird sonau dog thing that remains completely unexplained and out of nowhere eight heroine myster- BAM just some guy long gone sonau peopl- BAM here they are and they have zero connection to the ones of botw mystical dragons gracing the skies with their presence- BAM probably some dude who ate a magic pebble once strange mystical nature god you could rarely encounter in one specific spot and the area was made to feel utteraly unsettling but also divine- BAM now hes everywhere and only serves you as a shorthand for man pointing at cave the strange energy all shiekah tech was powered with with certain locations being ones where alot of it was concentrated including beneath hyrule castle clearly stating that somethings up with that- welp theres evil guy donw there but he has zero connection to all that lol

the whole shiekah tech thing, i just- WHY???? LIKE THAT??? there was so much stuff in botw that seemed deliberately placed that there IS more to it and now it all vanished and nothing of that mattered??? i saw a video of someone comparing certain places directly and on some where towers literally broke away tons of debris where just like .. sanded back down like nothing ever happened???; the fuking mechanism of how the towers and shrines and the pillars around the castle worked AND WHAT THE BOTW BOSS ARENA WAS ACTUALLY FOR?? its all gone and replaced with dirt; tHE ANCIENT FUCKING FURNANCES UTTERLY GONE AND REPLACED WITH ROCKS HUH???? so nothing of all that talk about their mystery and mechanism mattered???? the luminous stoens and its connection to spirits and how concentrated spiritual energy might have been what powered the tech- like you could connect things, and they made SENSE, so much sense that that seemed like it was intentionally setting up- only for it all to be just GONE?? to literally say lol it all vanished and that we shouldnt worry about it- like what the FUCK (and it also AGAIN doesnt make sense in itself bc WE SEE GUARDIAN PARTS in the towers, and some parts of them too are made of clearly shiekah tech stuff so it cant all have vanished- all their mystery doesnt matter bc idk it just works i guess lol and its not even called shiekah tech at any point either its just there and also not lol-)

(and even the smaller things like .. where the fuck does link live if everyone treats him like a goddamn stranger in the town you had to buy a house in botw for it to not be demolished and now that house is there but its not yours and noone knows you??? sth i personalyl found strange too that dumsda, the guy you help build an entire town, taburasa, had a very specific talking quirk i loved, and its all just gone in totk too, he talks like any other person all of the sudden

also at the end of botw finally being reunited with zelda and giving you the taste of being in the game WITH her at the same time in the intro to totk- WOOP away she goes! shes your pretty prize at the end and nothing more, what a way to disrespect her and her character..)

imagine if majoras mask didnt have the opening like it has and it otherwise stayed the same and they tried to tell you that its a direct sequel happening exactly where ocarina of time happened in the same world, zelda who?? ganondorf who??? things seem weird and off? lol dont worry about that :)) that would be weird and not make any sense at all now would it??

... sorry going on another rant again, ill just never be able to accept everything from botw didnt actually matter, and despite what some people might say, its pretty hard to ignore totk bc i LOVE botw, and as much as i hate it, they are connected in canon, even if it makes no sense

[miralunawritez]

Hiii could i request velvet x bitchy fem reader. Doo what you want witj that

Velvet with a fem s/o thats an asshole

warnings: cussing (reader), mention of weight, insults

It pisses her off at first, she doesnt like the constant attitude, back talk, or the arguments

After a little while she starts to think its funny, she gets used to it

100% tags you when she's arguing with someone online in a comment section because you gag the person everytime

Thinks its the funniest thing ever when you insult Veneer, she loves him but she also love its when he gets humbled

"Veneer shut up you look easy to draw" is Velvet's favorite

You guy are snappy with each other but y'all never really argue, y'all bicker but it never usually gets horrible

You are always arguing with other people though and Velvet is by your side the whole time, also arguing

You got into a physical fight once, Velvet wasnt super happy about it because you got hurt, but she was glad that you won

"I dont know why you're talking bitch, you weigh 120 pounds but look like you weigh 340, how is that even possible?" is another one of Velvet's favorites

She can put up with your attitude most of the time but sometimes it goes too far and she gets mad at you, not talking to you until you apologize

But not only are you bitchy, you're also petty. You and Velvet have went 3 weeks without talking once because you refused to apologize. She eventually came back first but she wasnt happy about it.

You guys argue online as a joke and Velvet's fans think it's hilarious, they sometimes cant tell if its a joke though.

You're like her little firecracker and she loves you with everything in her. Deep deep down she actually likes how spicy you are.

BONUS SINCE VELVETS WAS SHORT 😍

Veneer with a fem s/o thats an asshole

Thought it was funny at first but then he starts to take things to heart

He knows you act like that with everyone but it still kinda hurt

Even though you're petty you apologize to him, squeezing him to death and giving him a bunch of kisses because you cant help but want to squeeze him.

You guys don't really argue over it, sometimes you guys do when it goes a little too far

Obviously if we watched the same movie, he is not a sweet little uwu boy he is also a satan spawn like his sister, but he seems to have trouble standing up for himself, thats where you step in!

He thinks its hot when you argue with other people, your insults are creative as fuck, they got him chuckling

What got him was when someone asked you to look over a paper for them and you hit them with, "What the fuck am I looking at? You write like your hand got a lisp"

You guys play fight a lot, you initiate it obviously

"Yo ass look like a curse word" is another one of his favorites

You and velvet's girlfriend argue 24/7 but y'all are bestfriends (the one from the velvet version)

He argues alongside you sometimes but usually he never knows what to say so he just hypes you up

He hates it when you get snappy with him, it pisses him off and makes him sad

He's lowkey the type of guy to be like "I deserved that.." when you yell at him

[homicidal-lingonberry]

Some thoughts on Todd,

he started out as one of my least favorite evil exes, but I think part of that was simply that I could not quite figure out his motivations for a while. what is he gaining from being an evil ex? Why does he cheat on envy and veganism? I think I finally do understand his motivations now tho, and I am appreciating him more for it! and it also makes him seem a lot less jerky.

thoughts are mostly going to be coming from the comic and anime, with a lot of thoughts on his fling with wallace as well.

Todd is basically a pushover who is incredibly out of touch with his own feelings, and overvalues external validation. he is not the type to ever go for what he wants. not purely, not truly. he commits to what he thinks he is supposed to. goes for what he thinks he Should want instead of what he really does.

He isnt a vegan bc he wants to be. he's a vegan bc his father told him he'd never have the willpower to do so! I feel he is also in a relationship with envy bc he thinks he should be. childhood friends, and she wants him? and she's drop dead gorgeous, talented, and successful? he'd be crazy to say no, right?

I think him joining the league was a similar situation. It seemed like what everyone else was doing. so clearly, thats what he should do too, right?

But these arent the things he wants. He places value on these things bc other people do. But these things dont satisfy him, and inside him is an itch to act out in rebellion. the part of him that knows he isnt being true to himself. and he cheats!

He cheats to feel a sense of control over a life that is in no way his own. and I think that is why he feels so much for wallace.

bc why should he be with wallace? why would that be the obvious choice to anyone? It would be so silly to throw everything he has away for some guy he's just met. A guy that most people in his circle would probably consider a major downgrade compared to The Envy Adams.

but he is experiencing genuine attraction!! he is feeling fireworks!! he isnt messing around with someone who is simply a trophy or status symbol. Someone he thinks he should want, but doesnt really. he's messing around with someone who actually gets him going!!

Someone who he is into enough to realize that what he's doing with Envy is absolute bs!!! that everything he is doing is absolute bs!! And he chooses the real desire he has for Wallace, even tho it should seem like the wrong thing to do. In breaking up with Envy to pursue Wallace, Todd is finally Openly doing what he wants, breaking his former pattern of pushing it all down until it seeps out in secret rebellion.

and thats why he stops being vegan as well I think. he realizes its not something he ever truly wanted, he just wanted validation from his dad who was never going to give it to him anyway. And with the new revelation of choice, he quickly casts it aside.

While it seems like he lands in a rough place compared to the other exes, and it seems like wallace fucked him up bad, I think wallace gave him exactly what he needed. Wallace was never going to be the love of his life or happily ever after- Wallace was a wake up call.

Who better to show Todd how to get in touch with his repressed desires than Wallace, a man that denies himself no pleasure, and assertively goes for what he wants? Suddenly Todd can see he is allowed to be unapologetically himself. he doesnt have to be this person he hates being anymore.

What Wallace leaves Todd with is a new foundation to build something true on. One that takes into consideration that Todd is his own person. Its barren, but its steadier than the old one made of lies. and while he's got a lot to learn about himself, I think he will consider his own heart more fully from now on.

Where we see Todd at the end of the anime, he thinks he loves Wallace. But really, he's finally beginning to love and honor himself, and feeling more connected with his own heart than ever. <3

[bugboysgf]

Hate + Love

Chapter 4

Series Masterlist

Previous chapter

Summary: There is a thin line between love and hate but what if it's way thinner than you thought?

AN: I know it took me five months, but here it is.

“I need to know why he's doing this.” you pace back and forth in your room. Kitty just sat on the bed looking at you. She's never seen you this frantic before. It was the next day, you tried to not let what Derek told you yesterday bother you but it did.

“Calm down, i asked Q and he said he doesnt know anything, just that Min ho was worried about the date.” “I dont get it, this thing only happens in books not in real life.” you said.

“Maybe he's been reading too many books then.” Kitty shrugged.

“It always ends the same way… you dont think Min ho likes me right? He can't, he's him and I'm me.”

“It's a possible you guys are almost the same, i swear if you guys never hated each other i wouldve tried to set you guys up.” “It doesnt matter, Kitty, he can't do things like this. I had a date and I finally felt like somebody liked me and he just ruined it. He always finds a way to ruin things for me and I'm so done with it. We need a plan to get him back or make him confess.” Kitty sat there puzzled thinking of a plan. Suddenly she starts smiling and looks at you. 

“What?” you look at her confused. 

“We can pretend like you're moving out.”

“Moving out? Over a guy?” you scoffed, it didnt sound like something you wouldnt do and you knew there was no way it could be believable. 

“Hear me out, I know it sounds like something you wouldnt do but you think Min Ho is going to know that?  He's already on edge trying to make sure you dont find out about what he did. I can guarantee you it's believable.”

You look at her for a split second you didnt have an idea so hers was the best you guys could do anyways. “Okay fine what do i need to do?”

“Simple steps but it can be all completed in less than a couple of hours, firstly its breakfast so he's gonna go down there any minute. No classes today so you can go downstarts in a hoodie and sweats act like youve been crying all night. When you see him dont say anything, keep your head down and let me do the talking.” kitty explained. 

“Okay got it, this better work.” you knew this was extreme just to get a simple piece of information out of minho but if you confronted him you knew he was too stubborn to tell you his emotions straight up. 

You followed everything kitty said, you went downstairs with her with a hoodie and sweats on. You didnt want anybody seeing you like this, you were always well put together but today it was different. You needed to find out if Minho did all of this because he liked you. The possibility was very slim in your mind but in Kitty’s mind it was 100 percent the truth. 

You and kitty walked over to the table where Minho and Q sat at. You kept your head down and didnt say a word to any of them. Minho looked at you waiting for you to say something smart or sarcastic to him but you didnt. He was more confused than ever, he titled his head a little bit to see your face but you put your head down. 

“What's wrong with you? Why didn’t you go to class yesterday?” he asked you.

“She's sad minho. Leave her alone." Kitty said to him.

“I was asking her, not you.” Minho rolled his eyes. 

“Well she doesnt feel like talking, derkek ghosted her.”

“He ghosted you?” Min ho asked you in a concerned tone.

“I dont want to talk about it leave me alone.” you snapped at him. “Kitty, enjoy your breakfast. I'm going to go sign the papers.”

“Okay bye” kitty watched you walk about, minho waited until you were no longer in the cafeteria to say something. 

“What papers?” he asked, concerned. Q just sat there not paying attention to anything but his phone. “She's leaving.” Kitty explained. 

“Leaving and going where?” Minho was confused. What did she mea you were leaving?

“She's going back to los angeles she booked her flight and everything.” “Over a guy”  he scoffed.

“Yes over a guy, she feels embarrassed and she said you were right about him not liking her. She doesnt feel like she belong here.” “She does belong here, she loves this place.” “Well not anymore” Kitty shrurgged.

“You have to stop her.” 

“I tried but maybe you can just talk to her.”

Minho didnt understand why you would do something like this over something so minor. He didn’t mean to cause this much damage, all he wanted to do was stop you from going on a date. Now it backfired on him and he didn’t really know how to fix this but he had to try at least. 

You were in your room pretending to be packing. Kitty sent you a message saying that Minho was on his way to your dorm to stop you. The plan was working, you didnt know how you would be able to stay serious but you had to, you needed to know the truth. 

“open the door y/n.” you heard banging from outside of your room, you knew it was Minho. You huffed and opened the door. He barged in looking at all of the clothes in the suitcase and realized you were serious about this. 

“What's up with the suitcases?” he asked, he already knew the answer but he wasn’t going to believe it until he heard it come from out of your mouth.

“I'm leaving.” you said in a mumble. 

“But why?”

“I just want to be here anymore. I know it's dramatic but since I've been here it's like I can't compete. Everybody here has money and I don't. I'm on a stupid scholarship. You were right about Derek, he didn't like me.” you sat down on your bed with your head down. He sat down next to you looking at you trying to figure out what to say next. He didnt know how to comfort people and definitely not a girl at that. 

“He's just a stupid guy, maybe he was just busy.” “You dont get it, nobody likes me, no matter how hard I try. I barely have any friends here, and you hate me.” you were trying not to cringe at your words but you needed minho to believe this. 

“I like you.” Minho whispered.

“I mean yea you're starting to like me, afterall you did help me fix my necklace.” “No, I mean like, like you like you. In a romantic kinda way.”

You got up from the bed and just looked at him in shock. “What?”

“Listen Derek did want to go on the date but i told him not too. I had a video about him that I could use against his family. I got jealous, I'm sorry.” he explained, you were still stuck on what he said before. You got both of your answers at one time and it was a lot for you. 

 “You like me?” you asked, still trying to process it. You sat back down not knowing what to do. 

“That's what i said.” he said in a calm voice, how could he be so calm right now he just confessed his feelings for a person that he is supposed to hate. 

“Are you gonna say something?” he asked, he hated not knowing what you were thinking in your head, it was killing him inside. 

 You werent the best at saying how you feel but in this moment you had to, it was now or nothing. “I um- i like you too.” saying that to minho felt weird because you always thought from the day he met you that he would never like you. 

“Is it too much to ask you to go on a date with me?” he asked in a unsure tone, he didnt know if it was crossing the line after he ruined your first one. 

“No i dont think it's too much” you smiled. 

“So boba then?”

“It's a date.”

[little-wandering-faerie]

My hero headcanons!

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This list includes: Izuku Midoriya, Katsuki Bakugo, Denki Kaminari, Kiego Takami and Tamaki Amajiki ♡

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

Why am I doing this? I have no idea. But some of these are just random little thoughts that came to my head while watching the show. Now mind you I'm like on Season 3, so I could be VERY off about some of these..but anyway Feedback is appreciated, and if you would like more please feel free to ask! More below the cut! Some minor MINOR 18+ content so Minors...ageless blogs DNI!

Izuku Midoriya (Deku)

My personal headcanon is he's on the spectrum somewhere, like obviously he's high-functioning but I mean his special interest involves All Might, and like he's deadset on becoming a hero. He doesn't let anything stop him, he says the wrong things at the wrong time,

I feel like he'd smell nice, (not that all the guys on this list wouldn't but I'll get to that) but like if you hung around him, I feel like he'd smell like some sort of citrus I dunno like that's just a vibe I get off him, not floral but like he has a very sweet scent and I honestly think its because when he was still living with Inko, it was because she baked so much or had sweet scented candles, so maybe he has like candles in his dorm room that remind him of that.

We all know he cries a lot, but I honestly feel like that's also because of his mom, she taught him early on that feeling emotions isn't bad and it's okay to feel big emotions and such,

He has playlists for when he's studying, podcasts, and audiobooks, he's always absorbing the world around him, whether that be reading, or listening to something. He'd probably listen to lo-fi if it was music and it would be on a low volume, but if it was like a podcast it is something informative, if it is an audiobook it is his favorite book series, but either way, he's all about it.

I feel like he would sing well, not great but like I could see him jamming out to music and singing along quietly only to be told to shut up by Bakugo!

He can cook, I mean, yes Inko did a lot of cooking for him but you can't tell me he doesn't know how to, like maybe not as well as Bakugo can but boy can cook some decent meals or just bake really well!

He drinks coffee but its gotta be sweet, like not tooth-rotting sweet but it also depends on how late he stays up studying or training but in my head, if it's a study night he drinks it with a little sugar just to take the bite away if he's just drinking it, cream and sugar. He doesnt give me tea vibes not unless hes visiting with someone.

Katsuki Bakugo (Dynamight)

smells like cinnamon, or sandalwood, not cheap cologne. He gives me spicy scent vibes but refreshing in a way

Secret freaking nerd, I've seen a lot of headcanons against this but I feel like there is something other than heroism that he enjoys. It could be video games, it could be comic books it could be anything but he gives me secret nerd vibes and would tell you to eff off if you found his secret stash!

Bakugo, I dunno I know he's good with kids I guess later on in the series I dunno I'm still just in season 3, but I remember reading somewhere he's good with kids, and while there's no hate for those that think he'd love kids of his own, I personally do not think he would. I feel like because of his pride as well as his hero work he'd probably be a bit iffy on the idea of having kids if it ever came up. I think it's also due to his childhood because he grew up being told he was amazing and everything and he wouldn't want his children to come out as he did, I don't know he just doesn't give me dad vibes. Like he would have to work through much more to even think about wanting kids of his own.

He doesn't know what he would do if he couldn't become a hero, this is his entire life. Everything he has Ever dreamed of, and I mean he's never been asked "If you couldn't be a hero." 1. Because everyone is too scared of him to ask such a thing and 2. He's hellbent on it, no changing his mind

He gives me dog vibes like he'd love a dog. Scary dog privilege so something like a Doberman, or rottie, or even a pit bull. Just something as big and as "mean" as he looks but is a total and complete sweetheart and just loves on him.

I read somewhere as another headcanon that Katsuki could be Half deaf...And I love this because it makes sense. Like I get it if some people do not like this one but I think it makes so much sense

Denki Kaminari (Chargebolt)

My favorite little sparkplug, only became friends with Mineta because he didn't want the kid to feel left out. Yes I know he's a perv too but I get the feeling Kaminari is genuinely just sweet and doesn't want people feeling left out

Super self-conscious and I don't mean just about his body, I feel like he's self-conscious, especially about his quirk and what it does to him, and he hates it.

Kinda has Kiego's view on being a hero, in my head he just wants a chill world where heroes can live a little and have fun.

Denki wakes up every morning a little earlier to do his hair, He is health conscious and takes care of himself.

He's Adhd and has anxiety, hes got little stim toys too. Fidget spinners and poppable toys,

He gives me "plays video games but he's never sitting correctly vibes" like he's sitting upside down or backwards on a chair or standing up or something just he doesn't sit right ever!

This one is kind of common knowledge but he's pretty smart he just hates tests because he can't focus

He'd wear sneakers with a suit..like a full-scale suit and He'd wear sneakers.

Kiego Takami (Hawks)

He acts like a total flirt a total ladies' man but the dude is so busy he can't land a date let alone anything else. The dude's a virgin,

My wingy boy!!! We all know he drinks coffee and he probably smells like it too, that and like the activated charcoal shampoos, he gives me that vibe. Like he smells good,

Gets up every morning to do his eyeliner and its gotta be perfect otherwise he isnt leaving the house.

He gives me organized chaos vibes, like his house seems like it's a mess but he's likes it that way. Like its not gross type of messy but it's just chaotic, mostly cause he doesn't have a lot of time to clean

Man doesn't actually think as highly of himself as people think, he's a massive overthinker. So honestly I don't think he thinks he's all that great, especially with his trauma...

Is he scared to have kids of his own one day? Yes, and its not even that he worries too much about the hero thing but hes worried he'll be like his parents, he's scared the kid he has will grow up and resent him.

He cannot for the life of him see glass very well. Legit will fly into it and *thunk* man tries to brush it off but dude we all saw that.

He gives me alternative rock, indie, r&b with a little rap vibe. Like he listens to good music,

Sleeps naked or in his boxers, and finds it far more comfy

His bed, its..its a nest. Like a nest of pillows and blankets maybe a plushie or two.

Sleeps on his side, or on his stomach,

Does he still have endeavor plush? Yes...

When he can't sleep, he'll get up put some clothes on and find something to do,

He actually avoids a certain part of town because that's where his mom lives and at first he just makes excuses but he really does try to keep a low profile around there..He doesnt want anyone noticing him

His color scheme may be gold but he likes the color red. Yes the color of his wings

Likes shiny things, cause bird brain!

Has really good vision but cant see glass

Tamaki Amajiki

Aww shy boy! I wanna give him a hug!

Loves candy,

He gives me heavy-like, he has stuffed animal vibes.

Has to have the fan on in his room

Anxious texter,

Only child, lonely..

He gives me not necessarily bad parents vibe but something about it just..i dunno seems off. (Maybe I'm wrong don't @ me)

He loves animals,

So self-conscious of his quirk,

Spectrum, he is on the spectrum. He just gives me the vibe

Also gives me indie vibes, but listens to sad music too

Soft singing voice, I think he can sing,

Thinks eraserhead is cool!

He reads a lot like he enjoys a good book, some warm tea, and a rainy day cause nothing is expected of him.

Hes a good bean!

Will do the thing if you ask him if you're too nervous to do it! (I.e you cant order at a restaurant he'll do it..just..be patient..)

[faelapis]

so i watch wwdits. and i gotta say. that was the worst episode i've ever seen of not just this show, but maybe any show. ever. wow. i'm actually impressed with how bad it was.

i'm considering doing a more serious dissection of how Not to do a character arc or narrative framing. but for now, let me just share some general thoughts:

undoing guillermos vampirism totally shits on his character arc of standing up for himself and taking what he wants regardless of the morality of it. i hate it and it sucks.

also, the reasons make no sense. guillermo has had zero problem killing people until now. the roundabout way they try to explain it, like wow, he could smell someone's shampoo and imagined him picking it out and felt their mutual humanity... why would that not apply to any of the other people he's killed? he's even had somewhat of a relationship with some of them. yet all he's ever done when they die is give a distressed frown AT MOST.

guillermo is a killer and always has been. lately, he's even proud of it. that has, metaphorically, been part of him "embracing who he is."

but what bothered me even more was nandor. we all know this situation (guillermo being turned by someone else) is his fault for neglecting turning guillermo for 13 years... but instead, everything is framed as guillermos own fault for having someone else turn him. like - look at how mad you made nandor, guillermo. look what you've caused, guillermo. look what you made him do.

which, yikes. i feel like i dont need to say how bad that is.

even worse than nandors jealous rage.... i really hate the stupid condescending "forgiveness" afterwards. thats actually worse. like guillermo was right to be meek and apologetic for this, like it IS something he needs to be forgiven for. but its "okay" now because nandor "forgave" him. lets just move on. no need to interrogate nandors entitlement over guillermo.

you can argue theres the unstated idea that nandor is overreacting. sure. we, the audience, dont want guillermo to die, and thats part of the irreverent way the show treats death and killing.

but still, yknow?

i feel like i'm taking crazy pills, because the real question isnt whether nandor should "forgive" guillermo. in this context, guillermo has done nothing wrong. nandor totally reneged on their agreement as vampire-familiar. guillermo is supposed to serve nandor, and in return, nandor is supposed to turn guillermo. but he keeps not doing it, and in general being shitty towards guillermo. so guillermo takes matters into his own hands.

that COULD be a great character beat. it could confront nandor with his selfishness, and this uneven power relationship where he gets guillermo to stay by not fulfilling his promise.

but the question of whether guillermo should forgive nandor for not turning him, or for throwing a fit when someone else does? not even brought up. even though that really seems like the most pressing question. its crazy how subservient and apologetic guillermo suddenly is, like its S1 all over again. he does some token yelling at nandor, but his primary emotion is clearly guilt. its not enough to remotely change the shitty framing.

look. this show doesnt exactly have much "morality", and i dont want it to. i dont want any of these guys to become upstanding citizens. i like the irreverent tone and how theyre all killers.

but i do care about character arcs and agency.

guillermo has been treated like hes inferior the whole time hes been a familiar. and hes put up with it because he wanted to be a vampire. so by becoming a vampire, he forces the relationship to become equal. he also finally gets what he wants. which is ESPECIALLY poignant when it happens regardless of what nandor wants. it takes back his own agency over the situation, because nandor CAN'T hold it over his head anymore.

and then nandor doesnt like it. and goes into a murderous rage because of own entitlement at being the one to turn guillermo. thats fine as a starting point to a character arc, but guillermo doesn't even stand up for himself. he doesnt fight back as he should - or really, would, given how he's evolved to be more assertive. and then its reinforced by the stupid "forgiveness", like nandor has any right to forgive someone who did nothing wrong. it sets up this convenient scenario where nandor is not confronted for being a shitty master, but guillermo IS confronted for taking control of his own life.

and now, just as conveniently, guillermo just... doesnt like being a vampire, either. so nandor gets to further be a "good friend" making amends by helping "unturn" him. all framed like its about guillermo finding out what he "really" wants.

this is lame and it sucks. not only because guillermos reasons make no sense (again, he's been a killer this whole time? if anything, his arc is more accepting his own lack of morality), but because it resets the chessboard in a way where nandor doesnt have to learn anything.

nandor doesnt have to confront the sting of guillermo having agency to make this choice without him. he doesnt have to deal with the fact that it never got to be him who turns guillermo. he doesnt have to be forcibly confronted with the fact that he now has to treat guillermo as an equal, because guillermo now doesn't need anything from him.

and it sucks because all that could actually be a great jumping off point for them to, despite everything, start a real relationship. maybe even a romantic one. they could mutually realize they actually care about each other. regardless of this pact.

and you can say that by guillermo deciding to be human (as extremely lame and deeply uncool as that is), it also gives them this "equality." because he would stay with the vampires because he wants to, not because he needs something from nandor.

but you're missing the point - its NANDOR who needs to learn. its HE who needs to be confronted by guillermo making his own choices.

so guillermo just... conveniently changing his mind because he was a full vampire for one (1) fucking day and suddenly decided he's too good to kill people?

it robs nandor of that entire arc. and no, i'm not counting his stupid "forgiving" guillermo as learning to treat him like an equal. that would require a lot more introspection about his own entitlement. that would require him to actually say with his chest that guillermo had every right to make this choice, and its not on nandor to forgive him, its on guillermo whether he would forgive nandor.

that doesn't happen. what actually happens is nandor decides to show guillermo "mercy," which, again, firmly places the agency in nandor's hands. at no point does he have to be vulnerable and accept that guillermo might not want to be with him. at no point does he have to introspect about how he's treated him this whole time.

also. there is a long, proud line in patriarchal thinking of husbands "forgiving" their wives for perceived "disobedience," which only reinforces the husband as the head of the household and that said wives "should" have been more obedient. forgiveness is not always an act of kindness. sometimes it's very condescending. which it is here.

(same for the interpretation i've seen from some, that nandor "always knew" guillermo wasn't cut out to be a vampire. like that's why he didn't turn him. what a horrible, condescending idea. i don't know how you can look at nandor being like "i'm not going to give you what you want, because i know better than you" and not think it's shit.)

yes, i'm aware of the cheating metaphor. but its a bad metaphor. at least, not without acknowledging that its been an unequal relationship for 13 years where one partner has been neglecting the other constantly. at that point, the nuance should really come out and maybe the partner "cheating" isnt the worst here.

but that doesn't happen.

also... it's just a bad episode. like. in general. like the whole thing with the guide, where you think she actually gets to assert herself? sounds great. too bad its totally undone by gaslighting her into thinking they do like her and are nice to her. like the problem is they just didnt verbalize that "enough." thats yet another bullied or ignored character whose arc of standing up for themselves (even by immoral means, because its an immoral fantasy show) is undercut.

it sucks. guillermo sucks for losing his defiant streak (and metaphorical empowerment through vampirism), nandor sucks for being entitled. this whole show sucks. i suck for bothering to stick with it so long. i'm done. i'm out.

[menelaiad]

can I prompt you to talk about Menelaus sparing Helen I'm just like :chinhands: about everything u say about the house of atreus

hey, if you're willing to listen, i'm more than happy to talk - thank you!

so. again. we got Big Three versions.

menelaus says 'guys it's chill i'll kill her at home. let's all cool our jets' (this is the version in euripides)

menelaus goes to kill her himself. helen shows her boobs. menelaus suddenly very chill (this is also implied by euripides)

menelaus gets men to kill her. helen shows her boobs. men suddenly very chill (stesichorus)

CAN YOU GUESS WHICH TWO I DESPISE? no. fr. the last two (the boob two) are far too dependent on helen being vain. and helen .... almost not feeling any guilt or shame from what's happened. and we know that's not true from the iliad. these two, to me, are classic. THIS IS JUST HOW HOT HELEN WAS propaganda. cause yknow. ur a greek/roman/ancient dude and you hear that helen of sparta showed you her boobs like 'damn bro i wouldn't kill her either ahahahaha pass the wine, maximus'.

but helen was never vain. she was never arrogant. she was confident and self-assured. but it's pretty much everyone AROUND helen that comments on her beauty and stuff. she never really does herself? which is another fascinating element of her character tbh. so her doing THIS as a means to be spared? doesn't suit me. do i think helen wanted to die/was willing to die? no. but i think she would have gone about pleading for her life a different way, y'know? also i hate the whole 'her tits got her into this mess they'll get her out of it' like shut UP. menelaus is not 12. he's fucking 60 odd at this point. he is tired. he is wounded. he is so beyond mentally well. give him some respect. he wouldn't have been blind sided by this.

but i don't think menelaus EVER planned to kill her. i can accept euripudes' version cause i think there would have been a lot of greek men that would have wanted to see helen dead. it makes sense yknow? they dont see the full narrative. the big picture. as far as they're concerned helen ran away. loads of people died. and now she's gonna get away with it. they're not narrative aware enough to see all the cogs of fate and the gods and all this. so i can respect that some greeks would have wanted her to suffer and menelaus would have risked a fuckin riot if he outright said 'nah lads she's fine lets crack on' so the whole 'wait til we get home' narrative is a good way for him to save time. to buy him and helen some time to come up with a plan, a story. to hear each other out. to work through stuff. they don't get back to sparta for like. 10 more years. they can EASILY have come up with some reason why she's not been killed yet. or why he's not gonna go through with it/why it's all worked out.

in regards to menelaus never wanting to kill her, i believe that because of how menelaus behaves in the iliad. menelaus is constantly lamenting the deaths of the greeks. the needless death and suffering. how these men are working and sacrificing to get helen back. to bring her HOME. what would killing her do? another senseless death. all the sacrifice for naught because menelaus doesnt get his wife back. he goes back to sparta alone. as if he never even went to fucking troy and tried to get her back?????

and also because menelaus loves her. despite everything he loves her and he never stopped. it's why i really like his portrayal in IOA even if he is a giant ass clown. he's a man desperate to get his wife back. and he's under the impression they're just gonna go to troy and get her back. simple as. two months tops. he's frantic and desperate and willing to try anything to get her back (yo bro kill ur daughter for me kthx). and i don't think that desire to get her back changes. menelaus grows more subdued and quiet. and has less fire. but he's still trying. he goes toe to toe with paris, is willing to take on hektor. menelaus is very much: 'i am dying at troy or i am leaving with my wife' and how is that not love? it's literally. he is going to get her back or die trying.

(also idk how much people value to fall of troy texts that are around but like. menelaus kills deiphobus in those. when dei is with helen. the man is insane in those moments he could easily have took helen out too in his madness. but he doesn't. also also. when he's in the horse and he hears helen, he's said to 'groan' when he remembers her and given the context of the other men weeping and stuff. this is like. a groan of pain. hearing helen's voice after so long and remembering her. HURTS him. he's missed her so much.)

menelaus and helen loved each other. you see it in odyssey 4. the healing they must have gone through in those 10 years. is so admirable and powerful. and they did it because they wanted to. because they were gonna see this out. they were gonna make this work. and even zeus acknowledges it. because he lets menelaus into elysium just to be with helen (his own DAUGHTER) for eternity. even though menelaus has LITERALLY no elysium qualities. not even zeus cant bear to separate these two.

they're just so fucking powerful.

[morganalefae]

s3 morgana being "beyond redemption" is soooooo crazy to me like yeah trying to kill the evil tyrant king whos been murdering every last one of your kind is sooooo evil lock her up and throw away the key!!

such a prime example of a kick the dog character too. like they cant condemn her for just fighting for her right to exist so they have her executing civilians and trying to have gwen executed to make her into the villian.

and! the same goes for morgause! literally what did she ever do wrong? uther conquered camelot (said by him in the episode where gili fights in the tournament) and then executed hundreds if not thousands of people with magic but morgause trying to kill the king is a step too far? why? its almost like the show is actually on uthers side 🤨🤨🤨🤨

which leads me to: the fact that we essentially watch the entire show through the pendragon perspective. merlin protects arthur so everything we learn about the purge and magic and the old religion is from uther/gaius. so, biased, to say the least. one of the most important things they tell you when researching history is to consider where your information is coming from and how that persons perspective influences their discussion of it.

which is why i also dont consider nimueh to be a villain. shes an activist! yeah she tried to kill arthur that one (?) time but he didnt even die so. doesnt count <3 but we SEE her having a conversation ALONE with uther where she says she didnt know what would happen to ygraine and i just cant imagine why she would lie. if she really wanted to hurt him she could have said she'd known and killed her on purpose but i dont think thats the case at all. she says she never would have helped him if she'd known what would happen. like, surprise, if you hunt and kill people for the crime of existing they will fight back and its not going to be the way you like it and innocent people will die. because thats war. you ruthlessly slaughter her people and she will slaughter yours.

worlds most unstructered post. professors hate her. anyway the show eventually starts to take on a very firm, "merlin has magic but ues not LIKE those other magic users therefore hes ok :) everyone else is evil tho. except the druids (sometimes :|)", whereby merlin using magic is only allowed if hes helping or saving arthur (except all those other times but we dont talk about those i guess) and his stance on magic eventually warps until hes just kind of horrible about it.

100% unpopular opinion but gaius should have died in s2 or 3. he influenced merlin far too much and basically never for the better. sorry to gaius lovers but i do NOT like that old man. he advises merlin EVERY time to not tell morgana about her magic (which she has no control over and therefore is manifesting in ways that will absolutely get her caught), to never help any of the unfairly persecuted people of the episode or even to use magic at all. hes a bootlicking coward who only helped people he cared for or when it suited him. how many people do you think he watched burn simply because he didnt agree with the way they used magic, whether it actually "evil" or not.

merlin's only friends who know about his magic are an old conservative man and a guy who dies right when merlin could have used the support of someone to help him "come out" to arthur about his magic.

im firmly of the opinion that had he told morgana about his magic everything would have been literally fine. because alone and with loterally no support system at all, is it any wonder that morgana would go down the road she did? after years of fear and watching people just like her be burned for the crime of existing, with no prophecy or friends to tell her that it wont always be this way. you dont have to be afraid because youre not the only one and i wont let anything happen to you. oh wait. she did get told that. by MORGAUSE. not about the prophecy but how can they be judged by trying to bring about change by themselves. by trying to kill a king whos killed so many of their own people.

if the intention of the show had been to give a poignant message about the cycle of abuse (morgana succumbing to bitterness and hatred just like uther) or how fear can control you (merlin eventually becoming essentially the bad guy, judging everybody who doesnt use magic the way he sees fit, staying silent and contributing to persecution of magic people because living in fear can make you paranoid and bitter (sound familiar?)) then i would applaud because wow did that make me fucking cry! and hit actually very close to home! and it was tragic and horrible but also inevitable

but as far as i can tell that was not at all the point, because in the end kilgharrah tells merlin the prophecy has been fulfilled, albion is united and magic returned! hurrah! but. um. did i miss something? when did that happen? oh, you mean when gwen is queen....? so.... gwen unites the land of albion and returns magic to the land? except, merlin seems to have lived on until the 21st century of our world and magic is not what i would call flourishing atm.

so i guess my question is... well actually i dont have a question. actually wait i do. what the fuck?

[spacexseven]

(4/4) ok rapidfire round cuz i talked about aku and dazai WAAAY too much here are some other guys who work with this

fyodor - this fucker would legit get to the point where he actually fucking tries to kill you, and then a month later you’re just. back in his house. probably tied to a chair while he straddles your lap and pets your hair and coos about how badly he’s yearned for his little golubchik (little dove) since you last parted ways and how glad he was when he heard you were okay and how you guys should totally get married in the eyes of the lord and youre about to have a fucking anuersysm.probably wants to just pretend it Didnt Happen. he’d be very unequipped to deal with Feelings Of Guilt so he assauges it by showering you in affection and gifts and larping as Loving Husband. might tamper with you juuuust a touch so you forget about the whole thing, cuz seeing you flinch and try to get away from him makes his chest all tight and he doesnt Like It so you gotta stop doing it <3

gogol - all my ideas for him are VERY similar to what i already have down for dazai BUT differences are that he doesnt wanna torture you cuz he Dislikes you, he wants to torture you cuz he wants to see your Normal Person-ish reaction to incredible suffering! not only are you going through hellish pain, but it’s being inflicted on someone who you thought cared for you? how ghoulish! your reaction would certainly be one for the books! he gets attached to you probably the same way he did to fyodor, through you making real strides towards understanding him, but your Normal Ways would make him less keen on wanting to murder you and more keen on wanting to stay with you forever and make you his little birdie. you managing to piece together that your bf was actually that clown terrorist youve been hearing so much about DID throw a wrench in things a touch, but hes waaay too impressed with you to be bothered by it! youre even more amazing than he thought! wow! his darling birdie! lets stay together forever! why are you running away come back :(

kouyou - shout out to all my WOMAN LIKERS we got kouyou. gonna have to make this one quick i talked about the russians too much. listen. kouyou? she’s already got some baggage about losing the person she loves to the mafia, so falling for her target is EXTREMELY inconvenient for her. she wants to just ignore her feelings and be rid of you already, to save herself the trouble (insert wont say im in love from hercules somewhere in here), but you’re so... bright. much brighter than she ever thought she’d be able to experience, and you care for her so much… she just cant bring herself to let you slip away. please, dont hate her for bringing you into the darkness with her. she wont let it infect you, she promises! anything and everything to protect her precious light. 

CONCLUSION: im insane

- 🩹

can you tell i'm super biased towards nikolai :< all asks in this au (basically yandere uses the reader to steal info, falls for them as well) are tagged as #spy au 🐟

cw: yandere characters, obsessive behavior, possessive behavior, jealousy, violent threats, murder, forced relationships, kidnapping, imprisonment, manipulation, nikolai has previously pulled out a knife on reader and threatens to kill them.

honestly i don't think fyodor would ever feel guilt for his previous actions. sure, he's roughed you up far too much for the sake of the mission and ruined your life and tortured your friends but all of that was to bring you both together! everything that happened was for the good of your relationship. he always knew you were something special, back when he decided to use you as a way to get information about yokohama's ability users. in fact, he had already decided back then that he would have you join him to fulfill his goal once he gained what he needed to know. you would be useful in a lot of ways, but mostly he wanted you there for a far more selfish reason.

(it did get pretty lonely at the top.)

you thought fyodor was going to kill you after his true intentions were revealed, but waking up to find him holding you like he was cradling the most wonderful thing in the world made you realize you couldn't be more wrong. he had never been to pushy when you met, never asking anything suspicious enough for you to think he was using you. in fact, you only ever met him once every few weeks in a desolate corner when you felt tired from all your work. maybe that false belief that you two were strangers who would never meet at day was what led you to confide in him things you should never have. things you would have gotten killed for revealing if he hadn't already killed your superiors. whatever it was that convinced you to do such a foolish thing, it ruined your life now.

maybe his strange attachment to you wasn't the worst possible outcome. at the very least, there seemed to be hope of you getting out of here alive if his incessant touches and condescending words didn't completely tear you apart.

nikolai is pretty similar to dazai, except he's never been bothered by the job. he likes messing with people, and it helps that you're just to cute! if you're going to freeze every time he places a hand on your back and look all shocked every time he steals a kiss, he's going to actually start liking you, you know? not a temporary arrangement, like in a 'you're-cute-and-i-can-show-you-off' way, but in a 'you're-never-leaving-my-side-and-ill-gladly-kill-everyone-so-you-only-have-me' way. he's that initially annoying and flirty stranger who eventually grows on you, so much so that when he one day puts a hand around you and gleefully announces that he was your boyfriend, despite never having talked to you about this arrangement, you can't find it in you to object. he is sort of cute, with that killer smile. even if he is so reckless you worry for him all the time and has these frightening rounds of jealousy, you supposed it could work out.

he doesn't even need you to finish his task, to be honest. stealing documents and the like was child's play for nikolai. he just wanted an excuse to mess with you while getting paid. oh, but you treating him so genuinely, with so much care...he can't just let anyone else receive that sort of treatment in the unlikely situation he had to break up with you. if he had to kill you after this arrangement, it would be quite a waste, wouldn't it? you were so sweet to him. there were always other ways to make you cry—ways he was sure you'd enjoy almost as much as him. if you didn't...well, you'd just have to learn to like it!

imagine his shock when he comes to visit one day to find you...gone! like you had disappeared from your place overnight. even he hadn't been expecting this turn, after all, the two of you had been getting even closer. was it because he kept insisting on trying some potentially dangerous things in bed? but you'd have talked to him about it first. this was...unlike you. and then he catches sight of the news and realizes someone had leaked out some of his personal history.

oops. he forgot most people weren't comfortable dating a murderer.

too bad you didn't have a choice anymore! he finds you, as expected. with his ability and his understanding of you, it was only a matter of time. thing is, nikolai doesn't really like to threaten you so badly, really. sure, there were those times when he swore he would tear apart anyone who tried to ask you out, and promised to kill everyone you ever dated before him so that he could be the only living person to boast of such an honor. and he did pull out a knife on you a couple times but it was all fun and games! really! this time, not so much.

nikolai had you grabbing onto the edge of his coat while he dangled you over the edge of a skyscraper, having used his ability to bring you here earlier. you were probably too scared to be listening to him, but all he was asking of you was an apology and a promise to never leave him like that again. promise him you'd always be by his side.

he was so worried for you! this was the least you could do to make it up to him.

koyou would be devastated when she realizes what this feeling was. the strange warmth that came from sitting next to you, sharing meals and talking about work, quiet moments together—she was stupid for letting it go this far. and now...now she was in too deep.

if only she had stuck to her goal and only been an acquaintance to you. if only you hadn't shown her such a beautiful sight and the possibility of a warm future together. she couldn't bear losing you, couldn't live knowing she could never hold you as close as she yearned to after this was over.

unless...she took some disastrous action.

she knew you would hate her more than you already did if she brought you into her world. you would hate it there, but she was foolishly hoping her presence would make it a little more bearable. you were so wonderful to her...could you manage to love her just a little more? could you overlook your disgust for her tainted soul and hold her like you did, before the truth came out?

[anymethynker]

Yeah, okay, so... I have a fic idea that I'm never gonna ever write probably-maybe. So imma just share it will people on here. And if you like it, write about it, but tell me so I can read it please. :] (Theres a TLDR at the bottom if you don't want to read my rant. I'm sorry if I'm confusing. :[)

So to start, this is post mk1 and everyone is settling after everything is done. People are living their lives and they doing their own things. The thing is its centered around Johnny, for a specific reason. I want to see an outsider's perspective. Like his fans, his co-workers, and people he knows personally.

Now the twist, they see him hanging out with everyone else from the game.

You must be thinking, how is this the twist? How is this an interesting concept? Well, I feel like Johnny loves to be online, and that comes with sharing his life online. So imagine one day, a popular actor who's hasn't really been active online at all and hasn't been seen in real life(during the game he's recording shit but he doesn't have time to do it all the time), just randomly comes back into the frame. His fans are wondering where he was, but happy he's back. Co-workers wondering where the fuck he's been(they either hate him or are neutral about him). And people that know him, well, I feel like they hate him besides from a few(ex-wife just wanting his money).

The thing is, Johnny really doesn't specify any of the questions asked of him, just post a few videos with some people that aren't really important(the people part anyway because Johnny knows a lot). But we know that they people are important, and everyone learns this too, as Johnny ever really hangs out and post about them with him. Now everyone is confused because these are people no one know. They aren't famous, so why is Johnny with them. Fans think they're his team or something like that, and co-workers and people that know him just think they're assholes like him.

Then Johnny starts posting videos AND people meet then in real life. Johnny ever just posted pictures and small videos that doesn't really focus on the people. But now with Johnny having more free time and no longer acting that much(to everyone's surprise), he starts to hang out and post more funny videos with his friends.

People see Raiden(super nice guy that is kind to everyone), Kung Lao(silly goofy guy that knows how to have a good time), Kenshi(seems to be the best "friend" of Johnny(note that yes, I am applying shipping but it doesn't have to be)), Syzoth(curious guy who's sarcastic as hell), Tomas(the cinnamon roll of the group), Liu Kang(he be the father figure honestly), etc.

Now, the fans love it. People are feeding off of these interactions and want to see more if then. People who know Johnny are more iffy, how does he know these people? Are they this kind or are they just assholes pretending for views of popularity? They find out because of Johnny filming movies. Not everyone is there, the most recurring people are Kung Lao and Smoke.

There are specific reactions that would be amazing, like his ex-wife(cough reacting to his new boyfriend cough), his older brother(reacting to his new brothers and father), and some fellow stars(seeing how his friends can tolerate and even enjoy Johnny's company). His fans, when met at Cage Con or just stumbled upon, would be really excited, but it would really be awesome to see how they react(I can't think of anything besides shipping Johnny with Kenshi, saying Johnny is Tomas's and Syzoth's older brother, and Liu Kang being his honorary father. If you can think of anything else, jump on in).

Okay that's all I got in my brain this late at night, it early morning doesnt matter. Now this is just personal preference, you don't have to listen to this, just things I wouldn't really read or write. Not really an x reader type fic, I don't think you can fit that in here(jump on in if you can), and mostly found family fic(like now SubSmoke or ScorpionSmoke(I dont know the ship name ;-;) for some examples. If you do writing it with is, cool, you do you, not my type if fic bc of me seeing then as brothers).

Okay, I'm done. I'll probably make some small fics or just jot down the more specific ideas in me head later. If you do want to write this, go ahead!!! Just tell me when you do and send the link so I can fuel my brain. And if you want to take some ideas I have, do so as well. I doubt I'm the only person with these thoughts so I can share. Anyway, good night!!!!! :DDD

TLDR: Outside view from Johnny's fans, co-workers and people he personally knows reacting to him hanging out the people from the game.

[quodekash]

I could literally fall asleep any minute but im nothing if not sleep deprived and watching my favourite gay little shows!

hey nawa, I see you looking at guy as he struggles in the room on his crutches

you should kiss him

I think that you should absolutely just slam your face into his

give him another injury but its not really an injury it's just a hickey

(we're less than a minute into the episode and im already begging guynawa to make out, we're off to a great start)

we all know this is a complete lie, we've seen the trailers, we know what's gonna happen

but that doesnt mean it doesnt hurt my sad little gay soul

sailom what the hell

no way

no

you are not quitting school

is that a frikin letter of resignation or smth? can you even do that?

I love that solution and I wish it were a possibility but sailom's gonna say no, of course he's gonna say no, because the stupid bastard doesn't like accepting help for free

he doesn't understand the concept of FRIENDSHIP and FAVOURS

BITCH YOU CAN ACCEPT HELP, YOU'RE ALLOWED TO ACCEPT HELP, THEY ARE SO SO WILLING TO HELP AND GIVE YOU MONEY AND SCHOLARSHIPS AND PLATONIC LOVE AND H E L P

O4EKLGHNVWOERISDLGI HE MAKES ME SO ANGRY I HATE HIM

guy's right, and I hate sailom so much for it

BUT THAT'S THE THING, he WONT ask for help, theres no way in HELL that he'll ask for help

which is precisely how he ends up getting shot at, alone on a street corner, and why kang will have to rescue him on his bike, and why sailom will stand in the bathroom with kang holding a blanket over him as he sobs 'I have no one left'

its not that you have no one left. it's that you wont accept the help from the people who love you

(and also your brother kind of abandoned you and your parents are dead and your boyfriend also kind of abandoned you and yeah anyone would definitely feel alone in that situation so he's perfectly valid, but also ALL of his friends are offering help, his teacher is offering help, and he's accepting NONE of it)

HUG TIME

OH MAN IM ALREADY SOBBING

I LOVE MEANINGFUL GROUP HUGS SO MUCH

this could be one of the last times that they see sailom for a really long time. theres no way I could possibly be sadder holy frick

I SPOKE TOO SOON

WHY MUST THERE BE FLASHBACKS

WHY

I HATE EVERYTHING

y'know, I really thought he might hug him. but nope. he wrenched that pin off his shirt and took my heart in the process.

OMG

YES

THE PERFECT THING TO MAKE ME REMEMBER WHAT IT'S LIKE TO BE HAPPY

GUYNAWA TIME PLEASE GUYNAWA TIME

NOOOOO THE SCENE CUT BEFORE NAWA WALKED INTO THE LITTLE ROOM THINGY TO TALK TO GUY IM SO MAD

well, not really mad

mostly just sad

bitch wth

of COURSE he's not frikin doing alright

omg he's here too?

go talk to your boyfriendddd

and also ANSWER MY QUESTIONS PLEASE IM BEGGING YOU IM SO CONFUSED GIVE ME ANSWERS

awh :(

thank you krup ;-;

this man is lovely

not just for this but also just in general

but also his actor is the freaking DIRECTOR who is RESPONSIBLE for a LOT of my anguish so we can't be too nice to this guy

oh look at that. the shooting scene is right about to happen

I was expecting it to come later on in the episode but this works too I guess

who the hell are these guys???

they dont say a word

what the hell is going on

thank you kanggg

where did he come from tho

how'd he know where sailom was and that that was happening? did he just HAPPEN to be in the area?

or is he tracking sailom's phone just to make sure he's safe cos like he already got drugged once

hey man, have you ever heard of a little thing called dodgeball?

shocking, I know, but it IS possible for a gun to have been fired, and for the person being fired at to not actually get shot

I can't think of a single reason why sailom would make up this story. like sure you could argue that hes just trying to get an enemy/rival convicted, but he very explicitly stated that he has no idea who tried to shoot him, so it can't be that.

why the hell are you suspicious my guy?

acab is real man, holy frick

how do you know they're all fake tho?

maybe all of them were real reports and you're just an ignorant arrogant piece of shit who doesn't think people under the age of 20 are capable of being truthful

I hate this guy so much

OH MY-

NOW HES STARTING TO SOUND LIKE FRIKIN UMBRIDGE

I WAS IRRITATED BEFORE, BUT NOW IM ANGRY

deep breaths, deep breaths, in and out in and out, lets not destroy our laptop today

thATS WHAT I SAID!

I feel that

:(

im so sad man

oh would you look at that. ive been impaled.

yeah that whole scene was a trainwreck for me. I am very much not even slightly okay but its fine

OHHHHHHH

that makes sense

WHAT

ANSWER MY QUESTIONS BITCH

WHAT DOES THIS MEAN? WHAT DOES THAT MEAN? WHAT DO YOU MEAN BY THAT? WHAT ACTUALLY HAPPENED THAT NIGHT CMON MAN IM SO CONFUSED

the way they fall back into old habits, kang's arm draped over sailom ;-;

I ran out of images as per usual, BUT im halfway through the episode when it happened, as opposed to like ten minutes through, so that's a nice change of pace

[echotzzz]

“Elain should stop being annoying and accept Lucien already”

umm okay since when woman rejected or disliked a man… annoying??

Do Acotar fandom understand what it means to accept a mating bond??

It means you will bind yourself to that other person FOREVER. Be it your soul, body everything. He is yours and you are his. Like they cant get divorce or start a new life w someone else if that fail. This is not a simple bf/gf thing like this is a big deal, very permenant and forever once u accept. Its completely fine if you two ALREADY FALLEN IN LOVE and the mating bond is there to seal the deal. Like that’s romantic

But for Elain that never was the case. She has NO FEELINGS for Lucien. Her heart belongs to Graysan when her mating bond was revealed. And when she start to move on from him she develop feelings for Azriel along the process.

Like cant yall understand why she couldnt just “accept” Lucien.

“But she should give Lucien a chance”

this mentality or mind set really falls down to the mating bond and how the majority of the fandom sees the mating bond only from Lucien’s pov. Yeah he’s hurting not denying that and its sucks for him. But cant people sees this from Elain’s pov as well??

The place she came from there is no mating bond. She turned fae against her will and suddenly said to be some Fae’s mate whom she doesnt know anything about and whom she sees as the one who “betrayed her family” whether he’s guilty or not, but In her mind Lucien literally allied with the bad people that kidnapped her. Do you think Elain will ready to fall in love w him?? or attempts to open her heart for him??Like lets be real no bs if you’re in Elain postion will you see Lucien as this trustworthy, safe, worthy of her love kind of guy? I need people to be serious here coz Elain reaction to lucien made perfectly sense to me I dont know why people are so mad!! the first reaction of Elain to him were: “She cringed away from the coat, from him” .

Her being wary around him made sense to me and some people even went further to said Elain’s racist or a snob needs to bffr. Yall insane.

People would say it will be like feysand coz they also start in a bad place coz rhys is the ‘villain’ in book 1 but Feyre first word abt rhys was he’s the most beautiful man she ever seen. Theres ATTRACTION. AND HATE. which is good coz when there’s hate there’s PASSION and that could lead to FEELINGS.

and believe it or not Elain and Lucien did try spent time w e/o. Remember that tea time and in acofas?

And theyre being so polite to each other too. Elain is indifferent towards him. There is just awkwardness. Both Elain and Lucien has no interest in bridging the gap. Both cannot stand in e/o presence in a room more than 2 min (Lucien’s word not mine). Visiting Elain is not always in Lucien’s agenda when he’s in the night court. And thats canon per Acofas & Acosf. They’re just not into each other. You cannot tell me the reason Lucien even look at Elain is not because of the mating bond. Attraction and feelings cannot be forced full stop.

“Elain need to learn how to cope coz mating bond is her culture now”

She started gaining control of her life. Which readers expect that of her right?? to have a backbone? to be the narrator of her own FATE? RIGHT????

so why is it so shocking and oh so horrible for Elain to not want her mating bond? We see previous MCs rebel and protest to fight for their story but why drew a line for elain?

we accept her character development to be this independant woman who would not be coddled, some even want her to leave the Night Court to find her true self.

We want all the above for her EXCEPT her control over her love life. When it comes down to the person she should love, kiss and fuck, In that terms Elain should submit to the bond and just shut up??????

“Oh no how dare she reject her mate!! how dare she liked Azriel and not her mate!! the audacity, she’s so blind to his kindness, the jacket, the gloves, the pearl he gave her!! how dare she be so annoying and hurts his feeling. Elain GET IT TOGETHER HOE!!!%*\”

Cant yall see how irony this is?? What happened to attraction and feelings? Does that should be thrown out of the window?

Why is it a rocket science for Elain to actually like Azriel?? This fandom worship Azriel and want him to fuck them in their dreams (im not making this up). Why its ok for the readers to be attracted to Az but not Elain??

Its not rocket science its just this fandom already has this mindset about the mating bond and the perks of having a mate. Feysand and Nessian are what successful mate couple look like.

But we shouldnt be naive enough to believe that ALL MATING BOND ARE HEALTHY

Theres a lot of unhealthy mating bond mentioned briefly such as tamlin’s and Rhysand’s parents and a couple more from the Creacent City series.

Rhys said the mating bond is not a perfect system.

You can feel bad for Lucien. Thats fair. And it sucks to know that male has stronger mate instinct than the female. But what yall cant do is to put the blame on Elain. Both Elain and Lucien are the victim of the mating bond. The fault belong to the Mating Bond system and the Society that urge male to covet their female mate and have whatever it takes to make the bond work.

Wouldnt his fan wants him to find his own person who loves him for who he is? Thats literally what Lucien craves for. Acceptance. Atp Elain’s body language and reaction showed that she’s anything but accept him. And truly I dont see that will change anytime soon. SJM has spent 4 books and not any point we see Elain beginning to change her mind. Acosf literally showed that.

“If Elain will not end up with Lucien then why haven’t she properly reject him yet?”

This is not real life. Yeah!!! Elain’s happened to be a book character. And in books there are storytelling aspects and huge plot reveal. You cannot expect a huge moment in a character’s arc be done in any other people pov?

Like why people really want the news of Elain finally rejecting Lucien be in Nesta’s pov? Wheres the fun in that?? it didnt make any sense. Obv SJM is waiting for it to be in ELAIN’S BOOK whenever that will come out. So cant yall just wait?? Like pls just think for a sec.

“Elain doesnt deserve Lucien”

okayyyyyy…is that a dig at Elain? Coz like I said Lucien deserve someone who wants him for him and thats not Elain and vice versa.

“they should end up together coz they are mates”

Im sorry but mating bond will NEVER be the ultimate factor to fall in love with someone or SJM’s reason for her characters endgame. And certainly not for Elain who will marry for love. For all of grayson fault, Elain did truly loved him once.

Feyre doesnt love Rhys bcoz of the bond, but bcoz of love she agreed to bond w him.

…..

So to end this long post I would remind people that this is a romance story. Where the end game will be two people in love. So ATTRACTION and FEELINGS plays a huge role for the build up.

Also I highly think Lucien or the mating bond are not what Elain hates the most. I think she hate the fact that she has no say in this. That her choice are being taken away. And everyone around her expecting her to just accept the bond.

I genuinely dont have anything against people that actually ship elucien for their aesthetic and really hope for their endgame. Some people want Elain & Lucien to break the mating bond together to free themsleves of the fate that control their choices and along the way get to know e/o and developing feelings and so on. See!! this is a good story which doesnt diminish anyone’s character arc and certainly allow all characters to have a choice. “I love u for who u are and not because of the bond” Like with SJM masterful writing that could be pretty lit.

With that being said, I really side eyed and hate those who treat Elain as the devil incarnate for refusing Lucien and called her “shallow, dumb, indecisive, selfish” follow with “she will see her mistake, she will beg forgiveness, she will realise that she’s so blind to the-” oh no no no

Her feelings are valid. Refusing Lucien has been put as one of her flaws or why she should be hated is SO CRAZY to me. Yall dont want people to coddles her or treat her like a child so then…pls start accepting her words as it is. Dont try to twist it or double it down. If she says she’s part of the night court, then she’s part of the night court. If she says she doesnt owe Lucien anything, that means she doesnt owe him shit.