#to make me jealous and envious thats why

[holyheart]

hugh dancy is so Summerboy by Lady Gaga coded (the vibe and the beat) like don't tell me you can't imagine an edit of him to the bridge of the song.

[multifariousqueer]

starving for jealous Earth 42 Miles

OFC!!!!! Imma do this head cannon style bc why not 🤷🏽‍♀️

A/n: Continue to request stuff for both of our boys! Also I love writing for y’all ❤️

Warnings: jealousy, miles being possessive, fluff, suggestive situations

Jealous Earth42!Miles headcannons

I feel like he would try to be subtle about it but it shows

Definitely makes you wear his clothes 24/7 or makes sure ya’ll match

Makes sure you wear the jewelry he bought you and had it engraved so you’ll know who you belong to. Because, he sees you as his prize, his doll, his special beacon of light and he wants everyone to know that you’re taken

Hates some of your friends because he’s so possessive of you

“Y/n I just think you should drop her” “Why?” “Cuz she hates me and she’s tryna break us up. Also, I hate how she’s so nosy I don’t like that” “Miiiileesss come on, she’s been my friend for two years, she wouldn’t do that"

He had a point tho

He's def suspicious when you hang out with your guy friends(don’t even get me started if you hang out with them alone)

“What do you mean you’re hanging out with him tonight? Nah nah nah I better be there. No quiero que te aleje de mi” “Miles baby, Tengo los ojos llenos de ganas de verte"

“Miles are you jealous?” “no. I just don’t want people to take you from me” “Miles thats called jealousy.” “no its not; jealousy is feeling or showing envy of someone or their achievements and advantages or being suspicious of a partner in a relationship. I’m not suspicious of you, Mami because I know you’re not that stupid and you’re all mine so I have nothing to be envious of” “Damn, you’re right” “what’s new?"

Best believe when you are around people, he will slip an arm around you and kiss you on the temple

Death glares the guy you’re talking to and definitely stands up straighter

makes it KNOWN you’re taken

“Hey man, she’s taken, Aléjate de Ella!”

The guy doesn’t know what that means but judging by the way Miles said it, he knew to back off

I feel like Miles gets hit on by a very select group of people who think they could change him or he could be their “bad boy” but Miles only really has eyes for you

Makes sure he wears his matching bracelet you got him all the time

Knows you won’t drop any of your friends unless something important went down so he just makes sure everyone knows your his

Holds your hand a lot

Will speak for you

“Hey, Y/n wanna go to the carnival on Saturday?” “yeah sur-“ “We have plans for Saturday right, Y/n?” “not for all day tho-“ “I have something planned for Saturday and I’m not telling you the time.” “oh okay! sorry guys"

You hate it when he does that

Thats one of the many reasons why your friends hate Miles

At the end of the day, you still have to reassure him that you’re all his and he’s all yours

[seaadc]

Hihiii, I have a request! I hope thats alright? I just finish your Zhongli x Adeptus!reader migraine, and I fell inlove with it! its kinda like me in someway, I used to be huge simp for Zhongli, well until the Fotaine update, somehow I didnt simp like I used to for Zhongli, my attention quickly shift to Neuvillette!(I guess I have a thing for dragons-) anyways sorry for rambling!

My request would be like the same idea as the Migraine Zhongli x Adeptus!reader? change childe for Neuvillette, I heard Neuvillette is going to be in the lantern rite! that would a perfect place! sorry sorry if I didnt make sense, english isnt my first language.

you meet him again, the one who had shattered your heart. | zhongli

ANGST, no pronouns used, cocky neuvi, guizhong x morax, ESTABLISHED RELATIONSHIP

a/n: IDKWHY THIS TOOK ME SO LONG LMAOAXOAO slow writer here!! (bc i want it to b perfect smh..)

not proofread !!

no. really— no.

you didn’t expect he would be here, well, which was pretty stupid. of course he’d be there. he lives in liyue after all. it’s plain common sense.

but it seems as if you were just clinging to lost hope, a hope that says you dont wanna see him there, interact with him, anything else just not him in it.

morax, the god of contract. the god you once loved, but never loved you the same way as you did. it was obvious who he had in his mind and heart, it was guizhong. i mean— who wouldnt, really?

guizhong was pretty, smart, courteous, firm, everything morax wanted in a person. it was hard to hate her, it was more easy liking her.

yet, why was it so hard for you? why was it so hard to like guizhong?

everyone else did, so why didn’t you? is it because of how envious you were of her, is it because you were jealous that she had morax wrapped around her little finger, is it because you wished to be her?

you didn’t know. how would you? when you solely focused on morax. you didn’t have time for yourself. you didn’t realize you were hurting, you were in agony.

no one noticed, not even you, not even morax. why would he notice? when all his attention was all guizhong’s.

maybe that’s why you were a bit overjoyed, when you had heard she had been killed. well, you heard from a rumor.

you had left them, for good. to be put simply, you left morax. you bid your farewells to xiao, as he was the only accomplice you have enjoyed their company with. no one else.

i guess you could say you enjoyed morax’s company, well, not so much. guizhong was always with you both. there was never a chance you two were alone.

it’s rude of you to be happy at the news of her “dead”. it’s offensive and disrespectful to the god of dust. but, you really didn’t care. was it of envy? you don’t know.

it was the first lantern rite you have attended again, after so many years of avoiding liyue and residing in somewhere far away, which was fontaine. it was great, meeting many people and friends that were generous and kind enough to talk to you.

so seeing him again in present time, both your eyes locked with eachother, gazing at one another, it feels as if time had stopped.

you both were together once more, reunited by fate, was it to attempt to reconcile your differences?

it was always him and you. side by side, fighting with other mobs, gods, and other things.

but did he, for once, fight for your heart?

he did. but not for you, for guizhong. he fought alongside her when you weren’t there, were you just a second option? maybe you were. maybe you are.

neuvilette says you aren’t. he, word for word, promised that he wouldn’t be like your first love. so let him be the love that you need, let him be the one that you cherish, and you did.

so going to lantern rite with him, it was his wish when both of you had gotten together. you couldn’t say no to a pretty face.

i guess for neuvilette, meeting another dragon would be unpleasant. yes, it might sound possessive, but if you look on it at the good side (his side), it may not be so wrong.

especially because that dragon was once your first love. your first ever greatest. so he had all the reasons to get jealous!

zhongli looks devastated as he sees/smells another dragon scent on you, your aura illuminating a blue and white one. it wasn’t yellow and orange anymore. was morax replaced?

who is he to ask? someone who had left you, replaced and almost forgotten about you. so why bother asking if you still love him?

neuvilette wraps an arm around your waist from behind, your aura brightens as morax could only narrow his eyes. he wishes he was the cause of your aura changing and glistening. him and neuvilette had maintained eye contact, as if arguing firmly in their minds.

only they could see scents after all.

so, as cocky as neuvilette can be, he kissed you on the cheek as zhongli’s eyes wrinkled in envy.

“let’s go somewhere else.” neuvilette whispered, and you nodded.

and zhongli saw that faint little smirk on neuvilette’s lips when he saw his reaction. it’s making him pissed. why is he acting like this anyway? it’s because he only realized now that he loves you. not guizhong.

zhongli feels this inkling pain deep in his heart, it’s wrong. it hurts him so much, he feels so sorry for treating you the way you don’t deserve to be treated.

but it’s too late.

only in his dreams, you are his. but i guess he just woke up from his everlasting dream.

and he feels as if he won’t be getting that marvelous dream once more.

made by @seaadc and @seaadc only!

[ellilyre]

Ive lose the ask asking for my transmasc!Leo headcanon TT but i have them written down so imma post em like that

Leo transmasc headcanon

(many things are based on my own experience. Especially the dysphoria related things (so when i talk about Leo not being a real boy it is what he thinks bc of dysphoria. It’s not true.))

(warning angst angst (but thats Leo so that was expected)

it was so obvious even when he was small. He always wanted to play with boys, wear boys clothes, ect… His mom was fine with it. She bought him boys toys and clothes and even sometimes called him hijo. She was a bit confused, but she knew it made her child happy and it's all that mattered. 

However, it didn’t go that well with his foster homes. However much he tried, they always stuck to his deadname and she/her. That was a big part of the reason he kept running away. 

There really is no story behind the name Leo. He picked that one bc it sounded cool. 

Once he got a good enough passing, he did everything he could so ppl will assume he’s cis.

Don’t ask me how he gots his hands on hrt. It’s a long and weird story.

The wilderness school was very strict about not mixing girls and boys in dorms. 

Piper was his roommate, that’s how they met. 

In their memories created by Hera, Jason has kinda always known he’s trans. So Leo never bothered to hide it from Jason (as he does with others).

But Jason doesn’t have much (any) education on transidentity… At first he assumed Leo was a cis guy, and then some things were a bit confusing (why was he in fem dorms ? Why does he wear a tank top under his shirt ? Did he just ask Piper for a tampon???) but he just kinda gave up on trying to understand, bc Leo is a nice guy anyways. And with time (and exterior knowledge on the matter) he started to put the pieces together and to understand that “ooh ok that makes sense". 

Otherwise. Leo has no desire to get out of his comfortable closet. 

He has such a fragile masculinity 

Sometimes he acts a little bit macho. He’s aware he’s acting like an asshole but he’s terrified of being perceived as feminine. 

Why does he try to flirt with every girl he sees ? Another attempt to pass better (and comfort himself in his fragile masculinity) by copying stereotypical boys' things.

He overbind so much, GODS. Man will wear his binder for 11h straight (while fighting and running around) and then have the audacity to complain that his body hurts.

Piper tries very hard to remind him to take proper breaks. 

Jason is the biggest gender envy ever. He is handsome, tall, muscular… Leo really loves him but he also is so jealous and envious. 

He is very envious of other boys in general. 

When Percy got woken up in the middle of the night and left his cabin shirtless. When Frank went to take a break in the men’s restroom…

Gods, he would do anything to just be a normal boy. To be like them. To have their bodies. To not have to destroy his body to look slightly more masculine. To not have this constant fear that they’re gonna find out. 

And to add to the reasons why he felt so much like the 7th wheel : Among the 7 there are 3 girls, 3 boys… And Leo. Forever inbetween. Not a girl, but not a boy like the others either. 

Fortunately, with time he learnt to accept himself better and to feel more comfortable with others. 

Piper helped him to go easier on himself. And he had an actual proper talk with Jason.

The first person he actually came out to was probably Annabeth, bc she’s cool and wise and nice. 

And then he saw it actually was ok. She didn’t treat him any differently, she didn’t tell anyone else. She was cool with it.

He then told Frank and Hazel, with Piper’s help (mostly to explain to Hazel all those new terms). And it also went very great ! He then also told Percy and Nico. 

He’s not entirely out, just to his closest friends and his siblings at camp. And it’s enough. 

He still overbinds, but he has ppl to (discreetly) remind him to take care of himself. He’s still very dysphoric but his loved ones know how to remind him that he is their brother, an amazing boy.

[vrncaes]

Ok but seriously dark content hmm, like i said fucking cocolia in front of bronya. She doesn’t want it, she resists you. Its so shameful and abhorring. Thats her kid tied in front of you when you fuck her deep and slow, showing off the way her cunt swallows you up.

But then again she loves that dick. It feels so good. If its so wrong then why does she squeeze around your cock everytime you whisper dirty nothings and flick her clit in front of crying bronya.

And bronya on the other hand is seeping wet. Scared and confused and possibly traumatized but she is so fucking jealous of her mother. She wants to be in that position. Wants to take that huge dick deep in her cunt.

Anyways DO NOT BE HORNY KEIN! ☹️☹️

mahgawd ash, just the mention of cocolia and bronya alone is enough to make me horny you bi-

cw : implied dub-con , forced voyeurism , gags , bondage (tied to a chair) , creampie

nsfw under the cut!

ok, so.

just having a tied up bronya in front of you and cocolia. the supreme guardian thinks it's so wrong, to be fucked in front of her kid. she's supposed to be a role model for her since she is a mother after all. but why was she here, getting pounded away by your cock while her fucking daughter watches?

it honestly turns you on when you see bronya's wide eyes, fat globs of tears running down her cheeks while she observed the way her mother is getting railed like a prostitute. she doesn't know why, seriously, why whenever you thrust into her, she'd become more embarrassingly wet, and a bit envious. even if she wants to deny, she deeply wished that she was in her mom's position, taking your huge dick in her tight cunt.

cocolia in the while, can only scream and scratch at your back while she looks at bronya with tears in her eyes, mumbling apologies in her direction. "b-bronya, 'm sorry baby, 'm s-" and that's when you'll get her screaming and completely more fucked out, by the time you’re cumming balls deep into her.

“take it, guardian.”

just feeling your tip nudge against her cervix has her eyes rolling back, and having it stay there while you spurt your seed into her is not helping her to stay still.

bronya lets out a muffled scream when she sees you cum into her mom, her pupils dilating in horror as she proceeds to struggle against her confines. if only she had no gag on her now, she’d scream and yell at you, cussing you for making her watch her mom be used. but even so, she knows you’d find a way or two to at least shut her up. and she knows that you won’t be using some stupid fabric. <3

[townslore]

if you're comfortable, i would love to know more about the akechi npd headcanon. i think it's a rlly interesting take on his character and i wanna learn more abt npd bc i have bpd and ig im interested in what people experience with the other cluster b personality disorders? i just kinda wanna know why you think he has it and also maybe some of the mental stuff he has to experience with it. doesn't have to be detailed or personal i dont wanna make u uncomfy! i just cant stop thinking abt this hc haha :)

im actually on a mental health break right now, but this ask intrigued me so im answering it anyway. first off thank you for staying kind throughout the whole thing :)

its kind of hard for me to really describe why i think a character has/is something, because things like personality disorders are still a wide spectrum and every person experiences things differently, and i dont wanna make it seem like theres a one-way to have npd, but im gonna try anyway!

there is a site which helped me immensely throughout my self-diagnosis, so if you want to read more about the topic than what im gonna say here, here u go:

lets start simple and the thing that makes it most obvious to me: the engine room dialogue.

people with npd can heavily rely on other people for their self-esteem, because narcissists usually have a very low one. thats why they take on many tasks ("i was extremely particular about my life, my grades, my public image—so someone would want me around!") and might overwork themselves for more praise and acknowledgement ("you wanted to be acknowledged, didn't you? to be loved?") because its what they need to not constantly crash. a crash is something that happens when you dont get enough supply—which can be words of affection, praise, acknowledgement, etc—and you internalize it, doubt yourself, feel disgusting and generally you get to a really low point. this is just speculation, but i can see goro having a ton of those, especially during the time the phantom thieves get popular and he becomes public enemy nr 1. thats also why i drew him thinking "i really need supply rn but i'd rather die than ask for attention" because vulnerability is also a big thing people with npd can struggle with. we dont want to be seen as weak—our narcissism is essentially a shield, so we're seen as tough, when in reality, our egos can be very fragile.

one thing that the engine room makes very clear and also other interactions goro has with akira, is that hes very envious of others who have had it better than him. especially someone like akira, who was thrown away by society just like he was, was able to move past it, found friends and is acknowledged by many people. goro is jealous of it all, and thats the thing; people with npd can feel like they're supposed to be special ( and to me, with goro explaining how he got his personas, and how he often calls others stupid, its clear that he does feel that way about himself to a certain degree ) and anyone who threatens that status, anyone who seems much more special than we are is seen as a legitimate threat. its an ugly feeling and it can make us hate even those we love for some time.

this attributes to dysregulation of our emotions too. people with npd often feel their emotions, especially negative ones, way more intense than they actually should be and have difficulty calming down due to that. negative emotions often linger for a long period of time and its hard to move on so we hold grudges. now this might come to no surprise to anyone that goro is a very angry and sad person. especially in the engine room its clear that even after the others extend their hands out to him, its difficult for him to comprehend and he still acts rather mean and calls them idiots for trying to "save" him. when someone with npd is experiencing a multitude of negative emotions, it may cause them to avoid other people or act aggressive towards them because they feel trapped. theres many explanations as to why goro is the way he is in the 3rd semester, and i dont think only one of them has to be correct, but i do think that with the knowledge of whats happening ( like: being under the control of someone else again, or having to work with people who are unpredictable and who have seen you at your lowest point ) makes him act out to keep all of them, especially akira, at bay.

in the duel against akira—im sorry i cant really quote it, i just have a general idea of it in my head rn—i read what he says in a way that makes it clear that he struggles with a superiority AND inferiority complex, which sounds stupid at first i know, but its fairly easy to explain. like i already said, a narcissist's self-esteem is usually pretty low and we rely on others to know how to feel about ourselves. theres two traits of npd that are necessary traits to have: being self-centered and feeling entitled to good treatment, and seeking admiration from others/liking to be the center of attention. so there is some kind of superiority complex going on, at least thats what i would call it in goro's ( and my ) case. we can feel on top of the world in one moment, but once we have a crash or experience intense negative emotions, its back to being the worst human being on earth. i dont think its ooc to say that goro hates himself, as some like to claim he only ever thinks hes better than everyone else. i think that just attributes to harmful stigma. with everything goro experiences in life, coping with narcissism to hide a fragile sense of being just makes sense to me.

theres more i could probably add here but this thing is long enough as is. please do keep in mind that many of my headcanons for goro are me projecting—but that doesnt mean theres no basis for it in canon as well, as i've tried to explain here. at first i actually thought he could have bpd, but i dont know enough about it to really judge that—so it could still very well be that, or both, i dont really know how it works! im rather new to this as well, and at first i was scared of doing any research because npd is so heavily stigmatized. i wish there were more people like you, anon.

if you have any more questions feel free to ask them :)

[quitealotofsodapop]

Me pregunto como interactuaran LMK canon con el au monkey king and the infant XDD seria hilarante que vieran una versión del rey mono tan relajada y seguro de mismo (muestra sus defectos y no los oculta, canon wukong) y que macaco es una madre feroz que hace tapetes con la mirada y que ambos están juntos bjsabd

used DeepL translator this time cus google was acting odd;

"I wonder how LMK canon will interact with au monkey king and the infant XDD it would be hilarious to see such a relaxed and confident version of the monkey king (he shows his flaws and doesn't hide them, canon wukong) and that macaque is a fierce mother who makes mats with her eyes and that the two are together bjsabd."

I have considered scenarios where the Canon LMK characters interact with their Au counterparts XD

Like a glitch in the Wukongverse leads to the canon and the au verses colliding.

Canon & Au MK, at the same time: "Wow! Another me! Why are you in monkey/human form tho? Huh!? I've always been like this! Wait..." Au!MK: "Wait... you're not like a default monkey? That must be weird for mom and dad." Canon!MK: "WHOM???" *cue both MKs screaming. Canon and Au shadowpeach approach one another* Canon!SWK, pokes Au!Wukong's stomach: "Whoa, this version of me has really let himself go..." Au!SWK, annoyed: "And look, this me is still an emotionally immature slob." *grabs canon!Wukong's hand* "You try being half-mortal for twenty years!" *cue a multi-SWK fight. The Macaques watch on* Canon!Macaque, suspiciously: "What about you? How come you look so... content?" Au!Macaque: "Lets just say... I learned to forgive someone." Canon!Macaque: "Ugh. Don't tell me..." Au!Macaque: "I know, I know..."

Neither versions of the characters want to reveal information that could affect the others timelines/relationships too badly, but there's still slip ups...

Especially when the kids are causing havoc around the different Shadowpeach couples.

*Both shadowpeaches are sitting around on FFM. The different kids are play-fighting* Canon!SWK: "So wait, you guys got turned mortal because of some comet?" Au!SWK: "Yeah, its a long story, and we don't wanna give away too much that could like derail your universe." Canon!Macaque: "I think we can handle some interdimensional mayhem." Au!Macaque: "Ok, so it started-" *notices the kids playing a bit too roughly. Mom-voice activates* "QI XIAOTIAN AND LONG XIAOJIAO! You stop fighting like animals this instant!" Au!MK & Mei: "Sorry Bama!!" "Yeah! Sorry!" Canon! MK & Mei: "Uh, yeah sorry!" "Our bad!" Au!Macaque, voice back to normal: "I swear even if we were still immortal, they'd make us age..." Au!SWK: "True that." Canon SWK & Macaque: 0_0 X_0 Canon!Macaque: "Care explaining to me, what the fuck?" Au! SWK & Macaque: "Language!"

Canon Shadowpeach are def a little uncomfortable around, but envious of the Au married couple. Au Wukong and Macaque are very affectionate and have been reconciled for some time. Combined with an odd number of baby Mystic Monkeys around the alternate household, and the canon monkeys have a lot of questions.

Canon!Macaque, helping clean up dinner: "Soooo... when you meant forgive, you and your Wukong sorta...?" Au!Macaque, washing dishes: "Yeah. *Stuff* happened." Canon!Macaque: "In this context; *stuff* meaning your MK?" Au!Macaque: "Yep." Canon!Macaque: "Dang. One more question." Au!Macaque: "Go ahead." Canon!Macaque: "In making your MK, did you and Wukong ba-" Au!Macaque, face bright red: "Not where the kids can hear!! The twins have our ears!" Canon!Macaque, chuckling: "Ok then. I'll take that as a yes." Au!Macaque, still a little flustered: "It involved the comet. Thats all I'm gonna say." Canon!Macaque: "...what??"

Overall everyone is left very confused but with a fresh perspective on things.

Canon Pigsy is jealous that his au counterpart has more employees other than MK (au Wukong and Nezha). Both Tangs are just infodumping with eachother, while the Sandys are drinking tea.

The ones with the biggest shocks I imagine would be the canon kids tho, especially Nezha.

Canon!Nezha: "You look... rougher than me." Au!Nezha, unsurprised: "I imagine that you're still guarding the Map?" Canon!Nezha: "Ehh... not anymore. Wukong stole it." Au!Nezha: "Hmph. And they still let you stay in the Celestial Realm?" Canon!Nezha: "Yes? Why wouldn't they?" Au!Nezha, getting more quiet: "They didn't show me such generosity twenty years ago."

Both Nezhas end up chilling for a while. Canon Nezha is left uneasy after the encounter.

[thisdreamplace]

Dream, I trust you a lot, and sorry for dumping my mess in here but... I feel like I'm going through a lot lately and I'm confused as for where I stand. I feel like this year, a lot has been happening that has never happened before. For example, I feel like I've been getting my ego hurt a lot. I was someone who always believed a lot in myself (in my ego) and for example, lovewise, whenever I liked someone I always had this belief of "anyone I want, wants me" and it was always true for me. This year though, that belief has been challenged and I have been humbled real good.

I have a friend who's been triggering me a lot, not that she is doing anything, I have found I feel some sort of envy that I dislike, but I can't deny it. Something happened recently where a guy I had a crush on (it was not serious AT ALL, just a little crush), no one knew except for her and myself, and then we found out he liked my friend and not me. She started feeling guilty about it, but I was not angry at all (why would I be). Now I am angry because she's been pitying me and trying to "make me feel good" about something I didn't feel bad about. I feel ashamed? Because I can imagine her telling other people about it and pitying me because this guy likes her and not me, and that bothers me lmao.

Also about the envy, I feel like she's so effortless and everything is so easy for her, I know that I am always planning and overthinking and things do not seem to go my way, so it bothers me how she doesn't even try. It's funny because I have been on a spiritual path where it is constantly repeated that there is not effort required and then the proof (my friend) shows up in my reality and I am triggered af by it.

I don't want to feel this envy towards someone I am supposed to love and care about. She's been a very good friend and I'm feeling like a bitch. I just can't be happy when she's happy and I don't know how to change it. I feel like a horrible person.

And about the guy, I cried, not because of him, but because I feel like this year I have been put through so many moments where I am constantly being rejected, I don't know how to deal with it because I had never been rejected and I know we repeat "there is nothing to change, things happen in a perfect way" but then we also have revision. So I don't know what to do. I don't know how to differentiate acceptance from internalizing things that make me feel horrible. I feel victimized haha, and I feel like there's nothing I can do for me, except accepting victimhood. Omg I swear I am so confused and I feel so trapped 😭

hello <3

i'm glad you feel you can trust me. thanks for coming here to open up about your experiences and how you feel <3

i think that its veryyyy normal to go thru this phase in life where suddenly you're triggered by things that weren't triggering before. think about it, its really easy to not be triggered when everything goes well. and when its suddenly not going well... well when we easily waver like that, it shows that maybe we werent as confident, or secure, or trusting, etc etc as we thought. it allows us to deal with shadows that were buried deep, so that we can continue with experiencing the pure love and abundance that is there for us beyond those painful illusions.

comparison is the root of so much pain. that envy you feel is normal so give yourself a bit of grace here. we've all felt envious or jealous before in our lives and thats okay. the issue here is simple the way you see her and the way you compare yourself to her as if shes the pinnacle of success. but shes just living her life, and through that youre able to see where your own self beliefs are.

the thing is that if we can see people's wins as wins for ourselves and not something that works against us, we are able to manifest more lovely things for ourselves. here's some affirmations you could go off of to help you begin shifting your perspective: there is so much X for everyone ! including me ! (example: there is so much love for everyone, including me)

take it slow and let urself feel it out, bc trying to push down ur feelings never helps, it only encourages them to grow. so let yourself feel how you feel but don't settle with it. make the decision to, slowly but surely, shift your perspective on how things have been unfolding and begin anew.

its okay to feel like a victim for a little bit, to let yourself be engrossed in the drama and melancholy of that, sometimes its what we need. the thing is that you don't stay there forever, you give yourself a moment to feel it all out and you get to decide when you want to start again as someone who is choosing to actively believe in themselves and in their lives. i would say forget about revision here, bc revision can be more like an attempt at control when youre feeling so low, and when youre feeling that low and out of control, its best to surrender and accept where youre at so that you can move forward.

i hope this helps in some way ! <3

xo

[oletusfragments]

💌 to the recipient Victor Grantz;

At first I thought you disliked me, with how you'd flee the room so suddenly whenever I'd tried speaking with you, or look away in what I'd assumed to be contempt. It upset me at first, thinking I had done something to deserve your ill-view of me. I have come to realise otherwise, as the other residents have explained to me your general aversion to being in the centre of attention. Suddenly it made sense to my why you performed so well as a postman. Every letter crafted with careful attention to the people around you so that you could help us all in matches- I'm amazed everytime at your consistency but even moreso at how earnest you are. Forgive me for saying this but I'm so very intrigued by you.

In recent times everytime I get a letter in matches from you it takes me back to the excitement I felt reading the first letter you'd ever sent my way. I recall the hope it gave me to push on and eventually escape that match through that dungeon. I couldn't expect you to have known then, but I wasn't doing too well that day and was quite upset, but that small act of kindness from you was enough to help me rest easy when I went to sleep.

To be honest it's something I'm jealous of, the ability to concisely write in a way that touches the heart everytime, an envious gift to have. You may not talk to us in the conventional sense but your writing speaks in a way thats far more impactful. I found I'd be more saddened if I could no longer read it and as you're no doubt aware, the Baron has expressed we must get rid of your letters after the matchea so that we dont smuggle them for future use.

So I have taken upon myself to ask that perhaps instead of talking we could write to eachother, outside of the matches. I'm not as good as you at putting my thoughts onto paper, but I hope they reach you and that you may understand my intentions. I find myself reading too much between the lines in those matches to try to pry open the glimpse I had of just who you are. I ought to be more upfront in asking you, instead of wallowing in these feelings. Perhaps one day we could revel in eachothers presence without any spoken words too, if that makes you more comfortable. If I could come to understand you without having to utter a word, then I'd be willing to continue to write to you, if you'd do the same for me.

Eager regards, Dahlia

Victor Grantz has received your letter! 🔔

Victor has always felt joy in sending letters. The blissful reactions of his recipients is enough to make him feel the same. He does feel down sometimes whenever he wishes that there could be a letter for him too. Sometimes, he peeks at his letters just to momentarily feel what could be felt when someone sends a letter to you.

He became totally elated when he saw his name in the envelope. His whole body felt giddy with excitement and he blushes as the same color as his uniform.

That day, he immediately sent all the letters he needed to sent and competed the tasks he had to do. After that he rests in his room, taking his time at reading your letter.

Those words you've said, your praises, your sincerity, went straight to his heart. No one has ever said these to him.

He has sent letters but never received anything back. So to receive a letter about your love for him...he could just cry...–oh, but, from happiness, of course.

He is so thankful for your consideration of him. You acknowledged his existence more than anyone has. You've made him feel more special than he's ever been. You've made his wish come true.

Right! He needs to reply!

He rushes to grab a piece of paper and a pen from his desk drawer and immediately sat on the chair. The speed at which he did it is almost comical and even Wick is baffled by his sudden burst of energy.

Victor writes on the paper merrily, occasionally halting to think deeply.

This might be the first letter he writes and will delivers and so excitedly.

— Victor replied to your letter!

Dear Dahlia,

I sincerely apologize that I made you think I dislike you at first. It was unintentional...Actually, I didn't want you to hate me that's why I often avoid personal conversations. But, thank you for being so considerate of me. Hearing that you're interested in me makes me feel all excited and my cheeks starts to warm up...

You're one of the first people who read my letters more deeply than anyone else. You even replied to me. It's embarrassing, but even as a postman, I deliver letters everyday but there are none for me. This is one the first letters I've ever received. I'm really happy.

And yes! I would love to keep exchanging letters with you. I am not a vocal person. And I do prefer to keep things on paper... This is the only way I think I'd be able to talk to someone properly. Perhaps, in the future, we can be close enough to say our thoughts and feelings beside each other.

If you ask me, you might have already understood me better than anyone else. Thank you. And I hope I can make you feel the same way you feel about me.

– Victor Grantz

[ This might be the longest letter I've ever done. Hope you liked it! ]

[sillyasiani]

9/17/2024

I'm back :) and its been a long time since I wrote in here. I guess you can tell what that means lol. Life has been good! I'm lying lol. Well I mean life is good but at the same time it has been hard. I am still with Cho and I feel like we will be together forever now. It seems to be heading towards that direction so only time can tell what Haens. I forgot the p button was not working so excuse if some words don't make sense. But why am I journaling if life has been "good"? well for one I am sad. I have been wanting to break down and cry the last few days. Is it because I will be mentrating? will I be ovulating soon? idk. But I just have been reevaluating and thinking. Cho has been off of work for the last 4 months. I am so glad to see him thriving. It brings me joy seeing him live his life. But It also got me so jealous. Because he has this thing that brings him so much joy and I don't have that. I have not been working out.. I have gained weight. Not far off my range. But basically been around 141-145. Idk why I haven't been able to lose the weight the entire summer. Maybe because I haven't been working out as much lol. And I have been getting high frequently. SO when I'm high I eat a lot. So I am trying to avoid it I guess. But anyways getting back to Cho and him being off... I love seeing him live his best life. But I am so envious that he has something that gives him purpose. idont have anything that makes me happy or gives me purpose. I love watching tv and eating and raving. Wow. lol. And thats why I sad because I have nothing that gives me purpose or joy. I am just living with those things. Things that are meaningless. I don't enjoy hiking as much as he does, I don't enjoy climbing as much as he does. Am I sad because ou hobbies aren't the same? if you asked me this a year ago I would probably say yes, not I don't really care. Well I lie, it does bother me that idont love it as much as him. It makes me think and question why he wants to be with me. Or It makes me scared that if I am not like him he willl realize this later on that we are not matched. But I have been trying to evaluate how I've been feeling and why I felt sad. Its weird because I felt so heavy. My heart and my chest felt so heavy. And I was just waiting for someone, anyone, to ask are you ok? for me to finally break down and cry. Because I really am not ok. I feel like I lost myself. I am not the same Ashley as jersey Ashley. I feel like people find me boring and uninteresting. I find everyone boring. No one interest me. And thet has been consistent for almost a year now.. And the fact that I have been consistently finding everyone and everything uninteresting makes me wonder if its the people or myself. It makes me think tahat Im the boring one. I don't even have activities that make me happy the way it does for cho. He keeps talking about feeling "alive". I don't feel like I'm living at all. And I want to find something that makes me happy. I hate being a nurse now. I don't have friends our here. I don't workout. And this is the complete opposite of what I was 2 years ago. I used to love my Job, I used to have so much friends. And now I hate my job and now I don't have any friends I care for. I don't have anything thing that brings me joy. I have no hobbies. What is my point off iving here on earth. I went to the gym and I wanted to sit in the middle of the yoga room and I was on the midst of breaking down and crying. I have been walking around with this heavy heart, even now. to be cont...

[tryhardgwen]

rs archive 10/26/2024:

hiii i just want to start this by saying that ur amazing kdjfsfhks already commented on ur fic 'all my love' but i want to yap more so here i am bothering u hahahaha when isay that that fic is my roman empire, i mean it. bec these are some of the things that suddenly crossed my mind regarding ur fic fkdjjhk

hyunjoon asking minhyung if he was sure about the promise ring and mentioning it in his best man speech, like oh my god. i know hyunjoon with his bleeding heart didn't mean it maliciously but wooje is stronger than me bec personally that shit would just kill me ksdjfhsk i would cry hahaha like damn, that was something AHAHAHAHHA that would keep me awake at night, i would have high-tailed it and never come back. screaming crying breaking down skfujhkd it was a shot straight to insecurities 😭

pls hyukkyu and sanghyeok is just <333 i love them, i will give them all my mortal possessions, i will jump in front of a bus for them. pls tell me they end up together forever happy ending period 😭 i know its not possible for everyone to just have a happy ending, bec that's really not how it goes, but plssssss tell meeee they end uppp happpyyy annddd not separateddd 😭😭😭

minhyung and minseok, i love them, go my children, be happy. so soulmate!! i cant believe gumakeria just invented love <333 butt i have a question since these two are so soulmate, did they have any instances where they got jealous of another person?? or are they literally a match made in heaven forged by god himself the angels are protecting them, that they are so secure in their relationship?? (did that make sense 😭)

ur just so awesome. if u have a fanclub, i am part of it, i will be the president hahaha like, people always say that to be a good writer 'show dont tell' and thats something that u got in the bad. like 10/10 everything is just so vivid and real!! anyy tips or advice to us fic writers who strive to be like uuuu?? hahaha

(sorry if this is too long kjfksdf)

hii!! sorry for the late response ;A; but omg thank you so much!! yes, you can yap to me anytime. i love yapping about my fics soo much and going on tangents. (roman empire is so flattering and too high praise thanK YOU???)

hyunjoon asking minhyung if he was sure about the promise ring is a fucking slap to the face HAHAHAHAH. but i think it correctly portrayed (wow "i think" as if im not the author) the confusing feelings and whatnot. like, at the time, wooje thought him and hyunjoon would be together forever. yet shown in homemade dynamite, even though he thought that he still wanted more and still wanted to leave. it was almost an acceptance but not quite what he wanted? wooje has always been envious of minhyung and minseok. hyunjoon didn't start until after he asked that and after minhyung answered. hyunjoon was going through a lot of ?? doubts at the time, because, typically dont people want more experience in romance? in the passage after, i also think its interesting because it shows that growing up everyone assumed hyunjoon was the flighty one and the one that was going to leave. wooje was the one that thought they would stay tgt forever, and hyunjoon wasnt sure. but the thing is in his mind, wooje also wanted to leave. hence why he did right? ppl were surprised bc.. well wooje doesnt tell people these things. as for woojes reaction to learning the information, hes stunned for a while. i think its a little ironic how he's hurt by it, in a way. like "what do you mean you didnt think we were going to be together forever?" when he was the one that ended up leaving. its almost selfish how he asks later--“Did you say those things to shame me?” as if it was about him. (it wasnt. sharing the story it was about minhyung + minseok and their dedication to each other, and hyunjoons envy). idk i think it was a very poignant moment i put in and im a little obsessed with it (im not narcissistic i swear im just intrigued by the things i write)

im not going to say a thing about sanghyeok and hyeokgyu. i do not want to get in trouble HAHAHAHHA . however, sanghyeok does have a spinoff in the drafts. this does not mean its coming out soon though because i have 18738234 wips.

minhyung and minseok are so sweet i finally freed gumakeria from the pain i give them in my other fics. when it comes to getting jealous of other people, nah. i dont think outright jealousy ever happened. maybe more of "spend more time with me?" from guma but not the insecurity and eating away feeling that jealousy gives. its definitely never from a place of insecurity.

as for tips and advice kajhahkr well you didnt ask advice on an indepth topic like description or dialogue so imma just skim over them all and say the stuff off the top of my head. theres the basics first. essentially, proper grammar and punctuation. every writer needs a good baseline. if you read my older fics, i struggled with this a bit--starting sentences with verbs (?? gwen why???) and having runons and such. after that its just a matter of figuring out what tone you want to convey and word choice. thesauruses are ur best friend if youre constantly looking for more specific descriptive words to use but make sure to define and make sentences if you dont know a word bcus u wanna learn it! that helps when it comes to description. sometimes when u get in the flow of a fic really fast its hard to do description so reading + rereading and adding more description as you read is a good tip! i do that a lot. figurative language is a broad field and it depends whether or not you like it but playing around with similes and metaphors can be fun! like you said, showing and not telling is important. when it comes to dialogue keep it simple and remember to properly format your dialogue..! its a big help with characterization; figuring out who would say what and who wouldnt is pretty important with that. keeping in mind characterization and dynamic between characters helps dialogue a lot too. i go back and forth in my head a lot when i write dialogue, and i also consider how i would respond as well or whats natural. as for characterization!! highlighting character motivations is important! what is their gOAL in the story, what do they want in the conversation. everything they say or do is trying to get what they want, whether its "to give up a secret" (minseok trying to talk to wooje about his college pre-reveal that he dropped out) or "to hang out."

um i spieled a lot im sorry. i too, am a yapper. but if u have any more specific questions feel free to shoot them here hehe. thank you THANK YOU for this <3 i had a lot of fun reading and respondng. i hope you have an amazing day <3

[hellomeowme]

First day of penning my thoughts down

i am caught between wantingto express myself as honestly as pssible and being as eloqueny as pssoble - maybe those two cannot coexist on any plane of paper or platform i put my words down on.

ive been oscillating between wanying read more and trying tonwrite again. Here i am rambling on about the process instead of actually pouring my heart out rn. Im at R’s place rn, after i had a cry sesh about hiw lonely i am (you could fashion a calender out of how rhythmically i suffer from these spells of melancholia- funny because her casually (and causally) mentioning that she rode in some guys convertible in the morning was what caused me to spiral in the first. I want to say im not jealous, that i jus want what she has would be a lie because i distinctively remember thinking why does she have everything and i cant have this one thing that i writhe around filled with longing so often that ive discovered talking about it is futile - only breeds the particular brand of pathetiqué i feel like ive perfected over the last 3 years that have caused me to conclude my love life (or the dearth of the same) is hopeless. Maybe it would be true to say i am not envious of her though; now im thinking of I and whether i should send this to her because i want her to judge my writing (though i think i write better anyway) but i feel it will cause dishonesty to creep into this attempt to bare my soul to starngers on the internet. Also because me and R just talked about she is so wishy washy about studies and how it can be so frustating to talk to her. Also thought about K while writing this because we made this acc together, and maybe also due to the fact i talked about her with A recently. Im meeting C tomm and i dont want my frnds to see him cuz hes ugly and they know i dated him and i feel like a terrible person beacuse i told him to wear a mask for his safety wo revealing the real reason - my vanity. Im putting my hope into bumble for the umpteenth time and was constantly checking it as if thats gonna make anything change (j did say that im paralysed bw wanting a partner and not doin anything about it maybe that’s why im planning to use it more often). Ill check it tomm; i really need to write my journal- babye!

[mentalflowers]

it’s funny bc no matter how much i try to do better with my addiction, i’m over two years clean…it will never be enough for anyone. everyone will always hold it against me no matter what. it’s always youre a drug addict, oh you’re a dumb whore on the internet! it’s always the ppl who abuse their meds they are prescribed tho, you aren’t any better if anything you are just as sick as i once was…at least i’m trying to do better. i admit my wrong and have no problem doing so. you can sit there & run your mouth all you want, you have literally lied about EVERYTHING! every. single. thing since i met you, you whine on fb about how sad and pathetic your life is. it wouldn’t be that way if you acted like an adult. i have taken care of my shit since the day i turned 18, & continue to do so. maybe its the fact that you’re almost 50 and can’t even take care of yourself so you’re jealous a drug addict in recovery is doing her thing, making money off of simply being hot…maybe its the fact i get paid bc people are so interested in my sex life they pay to know, while you walk around like begging to talk about your poor sex life with anyone even when they don’t ask…showing your sex toys and just going on & on about it like they even care to hear! maybe its the fact that you are so delusional you literally believe all the lies you tell to people, i’ve dealt with so many ppl like this and its pathetic. ppl will always be envious when you have your shit tg. ik as a drug addict, ppl expect me to not have anything together & it probably drives them mad that even through my addiction i have done better than you. grow the fuck up & take care of yourself, stop tryna ride off the back of other ppl and be a fucking adult you pathetic excuse for a human. you can’t even talk like an adult, it’s all immature bullshit being spewed all over, every. single. day. and you srsly wonder why you have NO friends. i don’t care to have friends, thats the difference fr. i don’t need ppl in my life to fulfill me & help me get through my day, & it drives you losers MAD! keep lying on my name, bc at the end of the day i have proof to these ridiculous claims…so try me cunt

[lizzheartss]

L I Z B E T H A N N

liz aesthetics masterlist

Liz - The pale gaze

Liz, who’s eyes are pale, who’s look is hollow, who’s eyes tell the story of centuries lived for her life to come out already planned, that look, the clan’s look that can seduce man or woman who is with a tiny stare, the white iris that started from their ancestors, they are scary , but beautiful at the same time.

They are cat shaped, like someone spent hours shaping them for being the perfect symmetrical thin shape, (in general she is the type of person that looks like an old doll creator’s best seller product, perfect and beautiful) with double eyelids and slightly closed giving her that relaxed look, her eyelashes are long and soft and have an orange-ish undertone.

every one wants her, Liz is pretty, not a single being has not been dazed by her looks, not a single head doesn’t turn when she passes by, its the eyes, her eyes get boys blushing and girls questioning their sexuality, guys are fooled by her, she looks at them, eye contact starts.

her eyes don’t blink, eyelids blocked, her expression is natural, calm, in contrast with the blushed and aroused expression the other is assuming, her eyes don’t move, the contact goes on and on, its making you feel loved, desired, violated.

she doesn’t care, she’s just looking at someone, but she doesn’t know that her eye contacts are desired, before you could jump on your feet and throw yourself at her, she looks away.

thats not fair. You were honored, envious looks surround you.

Liz - The hazel curls

the most envied part of her, by everyone, those hazel strawberry blonde curls, thick, strong and soft, they are what you would call, ‘the perfect hair’, they don’t get messy in wind, they don’t get oily, they never loose their volume, they always smell good, not even rain can ruin them

they grow quickly, many times her jealous mother tried to cut off those damn locks, they always grew back the same length in less than one week, her mother hated her, but what she hated the most was her perfect hair.

everybody loved them, Liz took good care of her hair even as a child, she always brushed them four times a day with specialized hair brushes, her mother hated them because she knew that there was no way that she could ever get them, her mother’s hair were like everyone else’s, thats not fair! A respectable Marquise should have impeccable hair! And not be humiliated by her own daughter! Why must only her daughter have that hair? Why is she not the one who had princes fighting over a trivial dance?

she was always spotted at balls by princes because they fell in love with those unique ,adorable hazel locks, they surrounded her, stare fighting for who was going to be her first dance, before the prince of Adlers could reclaim his win, Liz’s dad takes her hand for a dance, nobody can touch Liz or her hair, not even the best of the prince charmings.

as a teen she looked like that animated girl from that Herbal Essence Girls 1976’s commercial on TV

Liz - The hated rubin

THE GIRL IN THE PIC LOOKS J U S T LIKE HER.

A woman’s hate

Women hate other women

As much as I would hate being in a lion’s den,

They are vicious and they don’t really care

To ruin another woman’s reputation, or even pull out their hair,

When they pass another woman they will always smile

But, deep inside them all, there is a deceitfulness and also guile,

What else can any man say about that tenacious breed

But, don't be caught in their web, if you are… then get freed.

-Randy L. McClave

are you aware of the beauty curse theory? Let me pull you through it.

Being beautiful is a bless, everyone will love her, she will be embraced with love and warmth, she will have hundreds of opportunities if life, she can have any man or woman you want, anything she wants, everything looks like it was made for her especially.

but it is a curse, all an illusion, she will be killed by envy sin, she will be everyone’s property and they shall do whatever they want with her morals and body because she doesn’t have the right to complain, she is beautiful and automatically everyone’s property, as she drowns in jealousy and anger of envious souls they will make the worst reputation of her,rumors killing you and pointed fingers on everyone else at her. All because she was born with her looks.

[wronaguide]

Activated 12/29/2022

I am feeling somewhat activated right now just been feeling I think envious of others. My best friend just was expressing herself and I find myself getting frustrated at her complaints even though I know she isn't taking it all for granted and just feeling jealous of the fact she has a partner, friends you are actively helping her out, and a family thats close by, and on top of that a really amazing Christmas it seems.

I think I also have resentment because I assume if the roles were revered she'd be crying to me, saying how she's so happy for me but why can't she have those things and not hold space for me or make a sad thing out of something that would be happy for me. However, I know that's just anger of not setting boundaries for how she complains sometimes and knowing that maybe she should express that elsewhere instead of towards me when I'm finally experiencing consistent joy/ good moments.

A part of wants to be petty or express myself in the same way I assumed she would, however an eye for an eye in this sense is not fair as I haven't communicated anything and don't want to act that way with my value and belief system.

[percyjacksonfan3]

One thing that makes me scream about Eddie and Chrissy is how perfectly pining their relationship is to the point where it hurts.

Like I love how Eddie literally WORSHIPS the ground Chrissy walks on and cant deny her anything while she’s over here struggling with lots of insecurities and doing what she wants. Like thats cute enough as it is BUT it feels like people forget how much Chrissy must look up to Eddie.

He’s a god to her bruh. He has so much agency and identity, because of him she finally realises how much she WANTS and how deserving she is of it. And Eddie must be star struck when finding out about it because like? Her????? Chrissy fucking Cunningham looks up to HIM???? Which is why I love your fic so much. The part where Chrissy admits to being envious of him and him being like this girl is not what I thought she’d be like at ALL.

Like I just love the idea of Chrissy, looking up to him while also envying him, stupidly thinking she will never be able to be like him ”One day this boy will be on TV, as some famous rock star or something, and every single girl in Hawkin’s High who made fun of him will wish they’d gotten it with Eddie Munson at least once, including me” ITS SO SAD AND SO GOOD AND the chokehold these two have on me is insane holy shit

Oh catch me writing a whole meta in response to this because I am SO glad someone came to discuss this with me

Okay so yes, thank you, I'm really, really pleased that my reading of this two is hitting home with some of you guys because their entire dynamic obviously also has ME in a chokehold, so much that I've written an 100k+ word fic for them that explores it

Putting the rest under a cut because like I said, this got lengthy

I want to make it so entirely clear that these two? They admire each other SO much. For entirely different reasons.

Eddie looks at Chrissy and sees someone who he thinks is strong. Before he gets to know her maybe he thinks yeah, okay, she hangs out with a mean crowd and dates a total jerk so maybe that makes her the same way. She's never been like that to him personally, or anyone he's seen or heard of (at least in my headcanon, because in my mind Chrissy is genuinely a nice person) but you know, peer pressure isn't a huge problem for nothing and Eddie's all about trying to help people break out of conformity, so he probably looked at her before their meeting in the woods with a skeptical eye because she's meant to embody everything he rebels and fights against in high school.

But when he meets her he quickly realizes that no, Chrissy Cunningham really is a nice person, and what's more is that he likes her. Not the way he's been half crushing on her for years (which he's felt totally guilty and chastised himself for because what a cliche and he's not into self induced pain, which this unrealistic daydream obviously is), but Eddie actually likes the real Chrissy that he gets to know after the woods and her surviving Vecna. And to add to that, the more he learns about her and the different pressures she's under and struggles she has (her ED, her mother, her wallflower father, peer pressures, etc.), Eddie realizes that for Chrissy to go through all of that and remain as kind and brave and optimistically hopeful as she is, takes a kind of strength he's lowkey jealous of. So he looks up to her that way and, as you said, absolutely rallies behind her to be that whole meme where it's like 'kick his ass baby, I got yo flower'. And you just know if any of the Hellfire crew tries to give him grief for suddenly hanging out with the Head Cheerleader, Queen of Hawkins High herself he absolutely does not stand for it because he knows how much she's gone through to remain the wonderful person she is and goes to bat with them for her without a seconds hesitation

And then we have Chrissy. Chrissy who feels boxed in by the life she's conformed to and the expectations she's slowly drowning under, Chrissy who genuinely does love cheer but not the pressure that comes from it, especially from her mother, but also from the other students at school. Chrissy who doesn’t get the best grades, despite trying her hardest, and doesn’t care about going out to drink or party all the time, and who kind of wants to get out of Hawkins, even if it’s just for a bit, just to see what the rest of the world is like because she knows there’s more out there. Chrissy who feels a little guilty for all of those things because she thinks she’s letting people down.

Chrissy Cunningham knows about Eddie Munson, sure, but the same things Eddie assumes about her (one-dimensional, mean, intimidating from her social status), Chrissy assumes about him (one-dimensional, maybe a little mean, very intimidating from what she’s seen of the way he acts to everyone else at school). Yet within seconds of them actually sitting down and talking to each other she realizes that’s not Eddie Munson at all.

And that fear quickly turns to a little bit of awe and envy.

Because you’re absolutely right, nonny, the way I’ve written Chrissy is as somebody who’s so desperate to break out of her routine and finally live, live in a way that she wants instead of others. And because of that she looks at Eddie Munson, who listens to the music he likes even if nobody else has heard of it, and who believes in his passion so much that he’s not afraid to be in a band and play in public for anybody who will listen. This is a boy who is called a freak simply for indulging his own interests and Chrissy learns about who he is and realizes that he’s not mean, he’s not scary, he’s just another kid like her, only Eddie is brave enough to say “screw what everyone else thinks, I am not wasting my life on meaningless crap, I am going to be me.” And in my fic he’s inspiring Chrissy to start finally doing the same.

Chrissy’s entire character (and I’m talking in the show now, not my writing) was an amazing contrast to Eddie’s, and I don’t know if the writers intentionally made them parallel and mirror each other so much or if it was accidental. We barely got to know Chrissy, we have maybe three concrete scenes of character exploration with her, but there was enough hints to show why her and Eddie just fit together so, so well.

They’re opposites in so many ways, mostly on the surface, but in their core they’re the same. They care about people, they're bleeding hearts (don’t tell me Eddie didn’t look at Dustin and Mike and immediately think, oh, yes, these boys need somebody) and they’re both tired of the way things are. There’s so many more but I’m going to shut up now.

I just... the unexplored potential of these two is never NOT going to make me insane. I would pay money just to put Joe and Grace in a room together to get them to discuss these characters and the dynamics and backstory and relationships they incorporated into their acting, just because I find the final product so interesting. The way they played off of each other in that woods scene is a bit of acting that I cannot get over, and it is such amazing fanfic fodder for me as a writer to explore that I guarantee it’s half of the reason these two have taken over my brain for the last month.

Okay, I’ll stop it here, but thank you so much for this ask, as you can probably tell I had tons of fun with it. Character analysis is one of my favourite things so I apologize, nonny, because I know this probably is not the answer you were expecting or looking for, but I hope I didn’t drone on too much.

Thanks so much for reading put your lips close to mine, btw <3 I hope you like the ending I have planned