#tone and context and voice will come better later

[doonarose]

“Crowley, you remember when I went to heaven to do the second coming?” Crowley really cannot believe Aziraphale just casually asked him that. Aziraphale continues quickly, “Right before I left, when we spoke…” he hesitates.

When we spoke! Crowley’s mouth is hanging slightly agape, his brow furrowed incredulously, a reaction that seems entirely appropriate in the face of such audacity. Crowley wills Aziraphale to drop it, his eyes flashing a warning as he steps a little closer, crowding into Aziraphale’s space.

Aziraphale manages to clasp his hands together in the gap between them, fidgeting as his gaze shifts to focus on the floor off to the side. It’s a drizzly Wednesday afternoon in the bookshop, completely innocuous, except Aziraphale has chosen today to trap Crowley in a doorway, stand squarely, infuriatingly, in front of him, and ask him if he remembers that day. Crowley could retreat but Crowley doesn’t really do that.

“Yes, right, when we spoke, that day,” he continues as thought Crowley actually had said he remembered. “Well, I think I would like to try that again,” Aziraphale confesses, voice pitching a little high, a little breathless.

“Speaking?” Crowley manages to squeeze an extra syllable into the word. It’s absurd but the alternative is that Aziraphale wants to try the second coming again and that’s just not possible. “You’d like to try speaking again. We speak all the time now, Angel, I hardly think we need to do it more.” That’s true, they are much better at speaking now, at talking to each other and listening. They’re getting better, but that doesn’t mean Crowley wants to talk about that.

“No!” Realization dawns on Aziraphale’s face, his eyes going wide and his cheeks flushing pink, “Oh, goodness, no, not that. Of course not, I wouldn’t – I’m sorry – ” He grabs Crowley at the top of his arms and squeezes. He takes a deep breath, something Crowley thinks Nina might have taught him. “I love you.” It recenters both of them, lightens the air in the room, and Crowley feels his heartbeat slow and settle, his fight or flight response thwarted with those three simple words or assurance. He rolls his eyes more out of muscle memory than anything else, but the corner of his lips also twitch up involuntarily. He knows Aziraphale knows he doesn’t often say it back and that’s okay.

Aziraphale drops his hands back to his sides. “Actually, I meant the other thing… with your mouth.”

Oh. Oh.

.........

A/N: So I posted this pretty much exactly a month ago and since then I've written... over 30K words that follows on from this beginning and you can go and read all of it here as well as two 8k stand alones that just jump to the good (explicit) bit.

[nichuuu]

Beats Me - 6: Come As You Are

Word count: 8k+

Of course, there’s a chance to turn away from all of this—a chance to stop her hand as it reaches the base of your shaft, a chance to halt her in the midst of tiptoeing to place a peck on your neck; there’s a clear opportunity for you to end what’s happening right here and now—it’s all a matter of how willing you are to go through with this. While your brain screams at you to stop, your body says otherwise; you lift a hand to cup her cheek.

As you tell her, “Just for tonight,” a wisp of a smile appears on her face, and you wonder, What am I doing.

---------

A call from Kim Minju at this hour is never good news. 

To give context: It’s one in the morning on a Saturday. Office workers and the youth above the legal age for drinking are patronising drinking spots, throwing back a couple of beers and basking in the euphoria that alcohol brings them. Perhaps they're using alcohol to cope with the stress of their lives, or maybe they're trying to numb the pain of recent difficult experiences. In both cases, emotions are running high, alcohol is coursing through their systems, memories are resurfacing, and maybe, just maybe, tears are streaming down their cheeks—nothing too out of the ordinary. If you were to receive a call from anyone else at this hour, you would've thought it a request to be escorted back home, or a soused friend dialling in to say incomprehensible things before truncating the call.

But for more context: Kim Minju has been the bearer of bad news since highschool. If you are to combine this with the information above, you know that something has probably gone down, and you’re the only man she can trust to help them. She never calls you on a whim; every call from her is a desperate cry for help. 

As you stare at her caller ID on your phone that vibrates on the table like it’s possessed, you start steeling yourself for what is to come. You’re hesitant to answer, but basic human decency gets the better of you. You can hear the deafening roar of club music in the background when you pick up, and Minju’s yelling into the phone. Even in the quiet of your apartment, you can’t make heads or tails of what she’s trying to convey to you. Even as you holler I can’t hear you at the top of your lungs, she continues to blabber her intelligible words over the pulsing bass of that horrible song that’s playing in the background.

Then it suddenly gets quiet on the other end, and for a moment, you only hear the sound of your heartbeat crunching in your ears. When Minju speaks again, you can hear the wind blowing by in the background, your indication that she’s exited the club. Her voice rings loud and clear in your apartment. 

“Eunbi’s driving to your place, she’ll explain everything,” she’s telling you. “She’ll text when she arrives, get ready to be picked up.”

The urgency in her voice drives you to acquiescence, and you throw on a hoodie and some sweatpants. Couple of minutes later, you’re seated in the front seat of your singer’s car. She’s running you down on the events that have occurred tonight, and the multiple mentions of Chaewon makes your heart sink further and further. 

It was enough dealing with her in the band. That shrill frequency she could produce with that trumpet was often aptly used to deafen you whenever she could (she sat on your direct right so she could be a bitch with ease). The bowl she used to collect her saliva was often “accidentally” (the way she said that word with such bogus innocence really brought you to your boiling point sometimes) spilt on to the leg of your jeans when you walked by, her trumpet case “coincidentally” (again, bogus innocence with this one) be in the way of your shin as you tried to get to your kit. Her behaviour wasn’t the culprit behind your irritance towards her, rather the fact that her behaviour failed to reflect what she had requested for when the two of you schismed—a clean break.

“She’s thrown up twice now.” Eunbi’s tone is a mish-mash of frustration and commiseration, “She refuses to move, and she's been groped twice. We don’t mean to drag you into this, but you’re the last feasible option.”

There’s an odd feeling of nihility in your chest as the two of you come to a stop at a red light. In the band, you dealt with her on a physical level. But when Kim Chaewon and alcohol merge, you know that you’ll have to deal with her on an emotional level, and that somehow fails to engender any spite or frustration of the ilk. The silence that hangs in the car is unsettling in light of the confusing sensations you’re experiencing (and also due to the fact that usually chatty Eunbi is finding it hard to start a conversation in this atmosphere), yet you find that you’re poised. 

“I’m uh… I’m actually your highschool senior,” Eunbi decides to input, “I used to go to the same school as you, Chaewon and Minju…”

You remain reticent. Eunbi takes the cue and returns her eyes to the road. 

The bouncer almost didn’t let you in because of your shabby fit, but a quick wink and a, he’s with me, from Eunbi was enough to get him to let you through. You easily spot Minju amidst club-goers once you get in.  Those long, luscious jet black locks that flow just past her shoulders and those large round eyes that always seem to be doleful quickly catch your attention as you wade through the sea of people together with Eunbi. She looks the same as she did all those years ago. She stands when you approach; Kim Chaewon’s slumped over the table they’re at. 

“Thank god you’re here.” Her expression tells you that she’s been through quite the ordeal tonight. “I… I hope you understand that—”

She stops mid sentence when you hold up a hand. You understand that such a gesture is impertinent of you, but you can’t help it—there’s too much to process, too much to take in, and a club isn’t the best place to assimilate it all (or to find a lover, an ex lover in this case). Minju steps aside, and you take a moment to look at the sorry sight of your ex—face down on the table of the booth seat and an empty shot glass in hand. 

“What do you want me to do?” you ask them. The two girls look at each other, then Minju tells you to do whatever it takes to get her out of here. 

So there you are—contemplating on whether you should dump a bucket of ice on her or gently wake her up. Basic human decency gets the better of you, and you slide onto the couch next to Chaewon, gently tap the bare shoulder that’s exposed in her outfit. When she raises her head off the sticky, glossy table, you’re momentarily reminded of the countless times you’d woken her up in the same way when she fell asleep in the school library.

Then those eyes—half-lidded and swimming in tears—lock onto yours. The volume of her voice pales in comparison to the blaring House remix of the Barbie theme, yet when she calls your name, it’s the only thing you can hear. She shifts closer—close enough to rest her head on your shoulder, close enough for you to smell the vodka on her breath as she silently sobs against you; Don’t go, don’t leave, she slots in between those heart wrenching cries. Right now: emotions are running high, alcohol is coursing through her system, memories are resurfacing, and tears are definitely streaming down their cheeks. 

Eunbi and Minju look on in silence. Eunbi’s lips are pursed, Minju’s eyes are somehow more doleful. Their looks are doing nothing to assuage the turmoil that you’re feeling. You find yourself saying things that you were never prepared to say. 

“She can stay at my place for the night… I doubt she’d want to go anywhere else.”

They look apprehensive, but deep down—they know you’re right.

***

“Uh… Are you sure you want to present this?” 

Chaewon looks up from her presentation script to give a simple, “Hm?”. You were scratching your head as you read over the vivid description of Kurt Cobain's death that she’d included. It detailed the nature of his death, the brutal imagery of small, tiny shotgun pellets blowing a hole through the skull of Nirvana’s frontman on the night of his suicide described in an unnaturally calm tone, as if people shooting themselves through the head with a shotgun was an everday occurance. 

“I mean…” You were doing your best to not sound reprehensive, “I don’t think Miss Kim would appreciate the… Visceral imagery.”

Her look was one of innocence as she asked, why not, and proceeded to further justify her vivid depiction (her argument was that Lee Chaeyeon had presented on Aviccii’s death in equal vividness and your teacher enjoyed it). The theme of the presentations for the week was “the talented die young”, and she’d decided to talk about one of her favourite bands at the time. She was blasting their hit song Smells Like Teen Spirit through the speaker in her room, and you were finding it hard to focus over all that grunge (you didn’t tell her of course, cause that would’ve made her pouty for the rest of the day).

That was one of your fondest memories from dating her. It showed you her tenacity and her stubbornness in insisting that she was correct. It showed you just how determined and strong-willed she could be. You found that you could still recall every detail of that moment as vividly as she described Cobain's death while you watched her walk around your kitchen from the doorway to your room. Her hair is in disarray, the set of clothes that you’d passed her baggy on her slender frame. For the record: She knows how she got here, she knows where she is, she knows you’re awake, and she knows that you’re watching her. In spite of all this, her movements are calm, her hand taking its time to trail across your cabinets as her eyes slowly soak in her surroundings. 

“You know, for someone that said that they wanted a clean break—you’re making things messier than they should be,” you can’t help but tell her. Her hand stops on the handle of your cabinet, her index finger affixing itself there for a minute as she lowers her head. With a sigh, you stuff your hands into your pockets and tell her, “Get out once your hangover wears off.”

You retreat back into your room to get some work done. When you emerge around lunchtime, you find that she’s taken liberties in your kitchen, a piping hot bowl of noodles sitting opposite her at your dining table as she silently slurps on a bowl of her own. You stand there for a moment, then you accost the eating space and stop just before her. 

“Are you being for real?” You can’t help but let the revulsion seep into your words, “You’re telling me that your hangover has lasted this long?”

She’s unwontedly silent. Her pugnacious, bratty nature seems to have dissipated into thin air, replaced by one of taciturn and timidness as she stares blankly into her noodles. She doesn’t look up when you sigh and slide into the other seat, nor does she say anything when you start digging into the noodles that she’s prepared for you (you aren’t one to pass up on a free meal, even if it’s prepared by your ex). 

It’s when you're halfway through your bowl that she finally pipes up, “thank you for taking me in.”

You go still for a moment. 

Then you choose not to reply to her. 

After washing up, you communicate to her that she has till sundown to leave your abode before you head back to your room. You know that she’s going to stay like that stubborn patch of mould beneath the snare drum in the recording studio when you hear her playing Smells Like Teen Spirit on her phone through the door. Once again, that damn song is reminding you of how tenacious and stubborn she can be. Those two traits of hers were really double edged swords for that woman.

Night comes; she still hasn’t left. When you exit your room, you find that she’s asleep on the floor. It seems that she’s found it congenial to sleep on the carpeted surface, even though the futon that you provided her last night is literally an arms length away from her sleeping body. Seeing her that way, you’re momentarily reminded of the times she’d stay over at your place while you were dating, and she’d choose to nap on the floor while you worked—even though the bed was empty. The reasons as to why she chose to do so are still unknown to this day—one of the many unsolved mysteries in your relationship, second only to why she’s being the way she is despite what the two of you have previously agreed on.

To be absolutely clear: the two of you know why you broke up. It wasn’t a case of a one-sided sudden change of heart; there was a reason behind it that you both understood (even though you did need a lot of time to come to terms with it). Yes, it was painful. Yes, it was unexpected. Yes, you did miss her for quite some time. But there wasn’t much you could do about it. She’d set her mind on the breakup, and her stubbornness and tenacity had her on wits end when you tried to talk to her. 

Was there a possibility the two of you could’ve stayed together? Your answer—yes. Her’s—only God knows what goes through that confusing brain.

Once more, basic human decency drives you to do things you don’t want to, and you end up cooking a share of fried rice for her. You lay her bowl next to her on the floor along with a spoon before seating yourself at the dining table to eat. You’re about halfway through a video essay about some game you’ll never play when she stirs from her slumber. 

She spots the bowl, then her gaze wanders to you. Silently, she picks it up and rises to her feet. Now it’s her turn to accost the eating space, except she isn’t belligerent, nor can you sense any hostile intentions.

“Can I sit?” She’s oddly genteel as she points at the chair opposite you. You’ll just end up sitting even if I say no, is your reply. She allows a soft, short chuckle before she slides in. You think about turning off the video essay, but then you decide to not let basic human decency get the better of you this once. 

So with some random guy’s voice filling the air, you and Chaewon partake in your meals in silence. You try not to look at her, but you can’t help but throw a few glances her way as she eats. She decided to grow out her hair over the past few weeks, dye it auburn, and now it drapes elegantly past her shoulders like silky curtains. You can’t read her expression (though you never could to begin with), and you certainly can’t understand why she’s become so quiet. She’s trying to make you lower your guard, soften you up then launch some manipulation tactic is what you’re considering. You won’t put it past her to use a facade of milquetoast nature to try and break past your boundaries. 

“I’ll be out by tomorrow morning,” she suddenly tells you. That was the first time you tore your gaze away from your phone for more than five seconds. How would one normally reply to such a statement? Oh, okay, seems to be one of the better options, yet you choose to go with, “Good, cause I’m not planning to overstay your welcome.”

Chaewon plucks a rice grain off her top lip. “But you’d let Eunbi or Ryujin stay, right?”

There you were, hoping that she’d be as timid and quiet as she’d been for the rest of the day. The nap must have gotten rid of the rest of the hangover, cause you can hear the haughtiness in her voice. 

“Are we really going to have this conversation?” you ask her. The firm look she fixes you with tells you, I’m gonna run my mouth on you whether you like it or not. 

“And here I was thinking you’re being a decent human for once,” you can’t help but mutter. “You’re fucking confusing you know that?”

She bristles in her seat. “You watch your fucking mouth player.”

You’re not one to take offence from such comments. Normally, you’d understand that in the heat of the moment, people can say hurtful things that they don’t mean. It’s natural, completely natural—the adrenaline, the emotions, the tension… All of it can melt together in the form of nasty words that spew forth from a person’s mouth. 

But when it comes from Kim Chaewon’s mouth however… You can’t seem to find that sympathy in you. She knows that you’ve slept with your singer and bassist, she knows that they’ve had you more than once—it’s right for her to feel this type of anger (even though the two of you aren’t even together anymore), yet there’s no part of you—not even a single atom—that wants to take the time to try to understand where she’s coming from and why she feels this way.

“Player?” You don’t mean to sound as pissed as you do. “Player?” you echo again, just for good measure, “What gives you the right to call me that? I’m not the one who couldn’t wait for their partner!”

“It was two years!” Chaewon cries.

“Well you could’ve at least tried.” You’re not even bothering to filter your words now. “You’re a hypocrite for calling me a player when you couldn’t even wait for me.”

“Two fucking years! Do you really expect me to close my heart to love for two whole years just so I can wait for you to get out of the damn military!” The way her tone conveys how right she thinks she is pisses you off, “I’m a human! I need love! Do you really expect me to wait for it for that long?”

She’s on her feet now, hands on your table, breaths heavy. 

She screams, “It’s your fault for signing on so early! It’s your fault for ever thinking that I’d wait!” 

You shoot up from your seat and cry, “Well then damn me for ever trying to believe in you!”

Her face contorts into a snarl. She skirts the table, accosts you with her arm whizzing through the air; she slaps you across the face. As the sting lingers on your cheek, you find your fingers curling into fists. 

“You’re horrible!” She’s hollering at the top of her lungs, “I wish that I never met you!”

For a moment, there’s only the sound of her heavy breathing. Then those eyes—bulging in their sockets and swimming in tears—lock onto yours. She looks just as she did the night the two of you broke up: hair slightly messy, face twisted in a mix of woe and fury, right up in your face as her face starts to flush under the intense assault of emotions and thoughts. She’s close—close enough to grip you by your collar and pull you towards her, crush her lips against yours, kiss you like she did when you were teens. 

And she does just that.

A soft cry slips past her lips, travels into your mouth as she kisses you; It feels exactly the same as it did all those years ago—the meraki, the slight tension in her upper lip, the light quiver in your bottom lip—a familiar comfort you had no idea you missed. Her small waist is captured in your grasp, your face in her hands as she pulls you deeper, kisses you harder. It was like she never left, like she never walked away from you because you had decided to enlist in compulsory military service early so that you could get it over and done with, like she never said, seeing you on the weekends isn't enough for me, I’m sorry. This won’t work out the way you think it will. Let’s just end things off here, nice and clean.

And get this: the whole moment is sweet and all, but deep down, there’s still a small flame of anger alit within you. Even though you kissed her back with equal vigour, you were silently cursing her for making things messier than it had to be; while your hands run through her hair, you find yourself berating her in your head for making you vacillate between missing her and hating her. You aren’t one to be flippant, but Chaewon had the tendency to bring out sides of you that you’ve never seen for yourself. 

Her tongue dives into your mouth, her hand pressed flat against your chest. She’s tugging at the fabric of your shirt, and you’re not sure if she’s trying to pull you closer or signalling for you to take it off. You realise it’s the latter when she guides you hand beneath the fabric of the shirt you gave her, your fingertips grazing the soft skin beneath it. Your palm rests on the flesh of her waist. Her skin was warm to the touch. 

Your mouths part, and you’re quick to ask, What the hell are we doing. She takes a second to catch her breath, then she replies, “I have no clue, but I’m not stopping whatever’s coming next.”

Going with the flow—that was so her. 

You grasp onto the hem of her shirt and gently pull upwards. She’s quick to respond, raising her hands above her head for ease of removal. Then her hands are on your waist band, tugging down at your shorts while your hands skim across her bare skin. She pulls your underwear down together with your shorts, lets them fall and pool around your ankles; her hand is quick to grasp onto your throbbing shaft. 

“Chae.” You can’t help but whisper your pet name for her. She starts placing kisses on your clothed chest, her other hand resting on your shoulder while the hand on your cock begins to stroke it with consideration. She leans in and whispers, “Can we pretend like we never left each other? Just for tonight?”

A foolhardy request. She doesn’t know what she’s doing by asking this of you, nor does she care to consider the possibility that the fulfilment of this request can and will invoke unwelcome emotions in both of you. Of course, there’s a chance to turn away from all of this—a chance to stop her hand as it reaches the base of your shaft, a chance to halt her in the midst of tiptoeing to place a peck on your neck; there’s a clear opportunity for you to end what’s happening right here and now—it’s all a matter of how willing you are to go through with this. While your brain screams at you to stop, your body says otherwise; you lift a hand to cup her cheek.

As you tell her, “Just for tonight,” a wisp of a smile appears on her face, and you wonder, What am I doing.

Her hand on your dick leaves to join and assist the other in undoing her bra. She lets the intimate garment fall to the floor before her, her bare breasts on full display. She’s certainly grown more voluptuous as compared to her eighteen-year-old self, and with that change you find an increase in desire for this woman before you. Chaewon cups her tits with her hands, lifts them up, then lets go; she’s putting on a sordid show. 

“Christ.” Christians certainly wouldn’t approve your usage of the name of their saviour in this abhorrent, impure context. “You’ve… Grown.”

“Puberty works wonders, no?” She’s taken on a playful tone, one that she was always fond of using while the two of you were dating. “Feel them. I know you want to.”

No sane man would ever turn down such an invitation. You can feel her erect peaks poking against your palms as your fingers close around the mounds; your breath hitches when you realise how firm they’ve become. Her hands join yours on her breasts, aiding you and squeezing and kneading while she lets a sigh leave her lips. Then in a whisper, she tells you how much she’s missed this feeling—your hands caressing her just the way she likes, your breath in her ears as you silently play with her like you used to.

Then she asks you, “Do you ever think about me when you fuck those other girls?”

You consider your words carefully. If you’re to be perfectly honest, there were a few times where the sight of Ryujin’s rippling ass cheeks made you think about her; sometimes the way Eunbi moaned reminded you of her. 

But if you’re supposed to pretend like you never left her, some teasing would have to come into play. 

“Depends.” You’re not even trying to hide how smug you are, “In what way are we talking?”

She gives you a look, one that says, you cheeky little fucker, but she plays along of course, offering a soft, Hm, as she pretends to go pensive.

Let’s see—she speaks as she (much to your chagrin) practically rips your hands off her body, all so that she can start circling you—Do their moans sound as cute as mine? Are their bodies as tight as mine? 

She leans in to pop the final question: Do their pussies feel as good as mine?

For the record: No to the first one, a fifty-fifty between yes and no on the second one (they all had amazing bodies). As for the last question, you couldn’t say (not because you didn’t have an answer, but more because ranking them in terms of how good they feel would be doing all of them an injustice).

Dunno, is the answer you offer her, then you follow up with, “Why don’t we find out?”

She smirks and rolls her eyes. “Segueing—impressive.” 

“I’m a laconic man,” you tell her, and, Oh shut the hell up, is her reply as she takes you by the hand and drags you to your room. 

It’s crazy to think that just mere minutes ago, she was on her feet, yelling at you and telling you how odious she finds you; now, she’s on her back, her head propped up against a pillow, still yelling, but she’s telling how good you’re making her feel—Fuck, and, Oh shit is all that’s really leaving her mouth, but the message is implicit—as your tongue applies painfully slow strokes to her soaking pink folds. The hand that slapped you is now scrunching up in your hair, the palm that made your cheek sting pushing your head against her crotch while her toes curl into your mattress. You’re wondering if she’s intentionally pitching up her voice as she moans, or if she’s purposely dragging out her sighs, but it doesn’t take away from the utter sublimity of the act. 

Chaewon’s slick is sweet; it’s tangier than Eunbi’s and tickles your taste buds better than Ryujin’s—you won’t tell her this of course, but it’s not like you’ll have time to communicate all of this while your head being shoved into her pussy. Believe it or not—this is one of the calmer moments of pussy-eating that you’ve experienced, one of the rare occasions where you actually have time to savour the taste of your partner, assimilate the intimacy of it, a far cry from when you were with Eunbi or Ryujin, where the goal was always to make them cum as fast as possible because that’s what they’re craving for. But believe it or not—even though her needy actions make it seem as if she’s desperately chasing her high, Chaewon’s really just trying to make the most of each and every swipe of your tongue, enjoying the way it skirts her clit and laps up her juices that leak out from her pretty, pink folds; all while she’s squeezing her thighs around your ears and begging you, Oh god, put your fingers in me. 

You start with your index finger, using the pad of it to trace the outline of her pussy. Then—just to make sure that she knows that it’s going in too—you let your middle finger join the fray. Your digits graze the skin around her flushed lips, taking their time to cover ground while Chaewon’s reduced to a moaning, mewling mess. What you’re really trying to do here is test the limits of her patience, see how much teasing that small, tight body can really take before her will breaks. It’s a sadistic game you’re playing, but you know that she’s enjoying it as much as you are, even though she is practically screaming at you to stick your digits inside her already.

If there’s anything that this world has taught you, it’s that patience is often rewarding. In this case: Chaewon’s patience was rewarded with the fulfilment of her request. The moan that leaves her half-parted lips is one of satisfaction as you dig your digits into her waiting depths, and they soak in her juices for a minute or two before they start to explore. Her nails dig into your scalp when your fingers dig into the soft flesh on the roof of her pussy. Your name flies out from her lips in a tone of surprise, like she’s taken aback by the fact you remember the exact spot inside her that makes her tick. The smugness on your face says it all, really, and you start to stimulate that spot of sensitive flesh. 

“Oh… Oh my… Oh…” She’s barely able to form the simplest of words. The pleasure you’re providing is racing through her body, filling her from head to toe with perverse need and taking over her bodily functions. You’re not doing anything fancy down there; your fingers are just wiggling against the same spot—a simple action that makes her body react in all sorts of complicated ways: twisting, trembling, twitching… It’s working wonders really. You’re amazed that she’s still as sensitive as ever. 

“Look at you Chae,” you can’t help but deride. “You’re getting so fucking turned by fingers. I don’t remember you being this needy.”

Even if she’s hellbent on retorting, there’s no space for words to leave her mouth—the moans are filling the space in her throat, bottlenecking and filtering out of her mouth in the form of strained cries. From the limited view between her thighs, you make out the image of her biting down on the nail of her index finger. Meanwhile, the nails in your head dig deeper into your scalp, hardly caring for the fact that they may be drawing blood as their owner manages to beg, Keep going. 

Your mouth—now rested enough to continue—rejoins the busy scene; the drawn-out guttural gasp that slides out of her mouth tells you all you need to know—Oh my god. You’re driving me crazy—and you can’t help but smile at the sight of her pleasure stricken face. Chaewon’s barely keeping it together at this point, the dignity that tightly wraps her body is slowly loosening—unravelling at the mercy of your mouth and fingers. The haughtiness, the sheer brattiness—crumbling under the sensations that overwhelm every fibre of her body; now that these perverse thoughts have entered your mind, you find that a dark part of you longs to own her, right here, right now. But of course, patience is rewarding. 

You’re willing to wait.

To say that you’re taking your time to eat her out would be inaccurate. If you’re to be honest, it’s difficult to describe the pace you’re using. Inside of her, your index and middle finger move frenetically, as if you are using them to press the same key on a piano repeatedly to produce the same note—her moans. Outside her, your tongue’s movements are almost sluggish, the broad base of it dragging up her flushed lips before the tip flicks the swollen nub at the top. You’re fully invested, scrupulously ensuring the uniformity of your movements to drive Chaewon to perdition. The movements are neither simple nor complex, rather a middle ground between the two (but you do feel that it leans more towards the former), but it’s enough to drive her crazy. Even if she’s a complicated mess to deal with, deep down—she still enjoys some form of simplicity. 

“Baby.” The way Chaewon’s calling you sends a shiver down your spine, stirring the emotions in your chest and letting some nostalgia bubble up from the depths of it, “I-I’m… I’m…”

Cumming, you complete just as her head violently whips back into the pillow. Then, in arguably the hottest ways possible, Kim Chaewon orgasms. Her thighs clamp around your head, becoming earmuffs as an onslaught of juices assail your mouth. You can hear her mewling past the flesh that surrounds your ears, and the muffled sound is enough to deluge your heart with depraved satisfaction while her body twitches, convulses and strains violently. The last vestiges of dignity that once enveloped her have fallen away, carried off by the sighs and cries escaping from her trembling lips, and as you lift your mouth of her soaking slit and withdraw your juice-slicked fingers, you know that she’s reached a point of no return. 

Patience is truly so rewarding.

“Jesus…” she pants. Once again, believers probably wouldn’t approve of the usage of his name in this context, but something has to cleanse the filth from her body, “When did you get so good at this?”

“Always have been,” you grin. You can tell she wants to roll her eyes, but she hardly has the strength to do so. For a tender moment, you gaze into each other’s eyes and appreciate this moment of inexplicable intimacy, re-living the emotions that were once so present between the two of you. It’s just for tonight. After this, we’ll go back to fighting, you’re telling yourself, and it makes you want to stay like this for a little longer.

But when Chaewon flips herself over onto her belly, the warmth in your chest is shut out and replaced by warped desire. With the tender cheeks of her ass on full display, Chaewon wiggles her behind, inviting you to take your liberties with her body. You take a moment to admire how full they’ve become. 

“Been working on it?” you ask her as you squeeze a handful of flesh. 

“To the best of my ability,” is her reply, followed by, “you like it?”

Your reply is to deliver a soft spank to the right ass-cheek. She barely even yelps upon contact, a small grin on her face as she watches you spread the flesh apart to reveal her entrances. Then she urges you, “Come on now… Pick a hole, fuck it till you fill it with your cum.”

“What if I want both?” You can’t help but be a little cheeky. Chaewon’s bottom lip furls behind her front teeth. 

“I’m not stopping you,” she whispers, “just promise me to cum in me.”

Not a trace of dignity in her words. 

Alright, is what you tell her before your head slips inside of her pussy. You can pinpoint the exact moment where her body almost becomes the only thing to exist in your mind—it’s when those walls clamp down around your shaft, pulsing ever so slightly and still twitching from her orgasm, and it’s enough to make you clench all your muscles while you hilt yourself in her. The sigh you let out hardly synchronises with Chaewon’s gasp. Yet, you find that your thoughts are perfectly in sync as your hands grip onto her small waist, and she props herself up on her elbows and knees. Her hair falls off her back, cascading down her shoulders as she turns her head, catches your gaze to tell you—Own this pussy.

No more words need be said. Eagerly, you begin to pump yourself in and out of Chaewon’s slick, tight pussy, her body tightening around your cock with every thrust in and out, lathering your length with juices that glisten in the low light of your room. The sound of her sighs and gasps quickly rise in volume, a beautiful backdrop to the sounds of your wet shaft penetrating her slick pussy again and again. 

You’ve already lost yourself in her from the moment you stuck your member into her, but you find your grasp on reality somehow slipping further and further with each thrust you make into that amazingly tight body. It’s the nostalgia—that feeling of being able to hold her again, the feeling of being able to fuck her like you did on those nights after you graduated high school, those nights where her parents weren’t home and she wanted you in ever way possible—that’s making you sink deeper and deeper into this new reality that is Kim Chaewon’s body. 

Then her moans start once more; you give in to the carnal emotions that you’ve been doing a really bad job at suppressing, and almost at once, Chaewon becomes the only thing that matters. Her flesh suddenly feels softer than before, her moans and sighs and cries sounding closer and closer to a melody than a haphazard arrangement of notes, and when she rasps for you to fuck her harder, you’re quick to oblige. 

Screw patience, you’re going to take what’s yours right here and now.

Your hands drift up from her waist, grip her shoulders and pull her till her body is almost upright. Your left hand slides down, wraps around her flat tummy; your right follows suit—you’re practically hugging her. Chaewon’s arms reach behind her, lock themselves around your neck and pull her face closer to yours. She doesn’t turn to kiss you—that’d take too much energy, energy that she would rather put into moaning—so you settle on capturing her earlobe between your lips, sucking on it softly while she starts to moan your name. Then, her confessions start. 

I’ve missed this, I’ve missed you… Oh god, I fucking missed the way your cock stretched me out. So good… So fucking good… This pussy was made for your cock.

Those were just some of the many things you managed to make out. The words were hastily assembled, phonics loosely strung together, and then expelled from those beautiful pink lips in a precipitate manner. There were other things like: I love you, I fucking love you and Oh God I love you as well, but your tried not to make to much of it. Even though you’re lost in paradise, lost in her body, your subconscious is still actively fighting to keep her influence out of your head. Things are already messy—both figuratively and literally—as they are, and the last thing you need is to fall in love with memories of Chaewon while you’re fucking her in such a callous, unrelenting manner. Sex and alexithymia towards an ex is never a good combination—yet here you are, rearranging the insides of Kim Chaewon after agreeing to whatever it was you agreed to before you started (it’s not because you chose to forget, but because you truly can’t remember anything past the point where you stepped through the doorway to your bedroom). 

You push away the thoughts (for now), letting them exit your body together with the growl that you release into her ear—Chaewon, why are you so fucking wet?—as your shaft continues to plunge itself between her slick, wet folds. The cheeks of her ass ripple deliciously with each strike of your crotch against hers, eliciting a raunchy exclamation from her body each time she hilts you to the base of your cock. You’re not going particularly fast—Chaewon suddenly has the capacity to reply, I’m always wet for you, baby—but you’re so utterly deep inside her that it’s driving the both of you to perverted elation. The position compromises your speed, but you know for a fact that Chaewon is more than happy to make the trade off, savouring the feel of every inch of you filling her insides at a considerate yet fervent pace. 

“Baby.” Her pet name for you is really doing dangerous things to your feelings, “Harder. Let me feel all of you, just like last time.”

She turns her head to meet your gaze, and it’s only then that you see the tears streaming down her cheeks. Your best guess: just like how nostalgia has its effect on you, it's impacting her too. Her emotions are being dallied with, just as yours are. She’s feeling things that she can’t describe, and she doesn’t know if it’s the rock-hard meat drilling in and out of her that’s making her feel this way, or if it's the fact that she may very well be falling for you again. You may never fully comprehend the intricate workings of human emotions, but as you lean in and gently draw her lips to yours, you hope to help her make sense of her feelings.

Why does she always make things messier than they have to be, your asking yourself, all while her hand finds your left cheek, gripping it tightly as your lips part and she whispers, “Fucking own me. Make this pussy yours, just like you used to.”

Just like last time, just like you used to—two statements that unwittingly conveyed that she’s dabbling in the past in a foolhardy manner. Damn it Chae… Why are you doing this? You’re thinking, even as you’re riotously making her bouncing breasts you handlebars, pinching her stiff peaks with between the gap of your middle and forefinger as you double down on her. You’re wondering, Why do you have to make this so damn complicated, as she leans back into you, and you mark the skin of her neck with your lips. Why couldn’t you just wait for me? Things wouldn’t have to be this way if you just had some damn patience, you’re pondering, all while she starts to throw herself back onto your cock. It’s hard to tell if she truly understands the emotional state she’s put herself in, you tell yourself. The irony of this statement is not lost on you, and you’re inwardly chortling at yourself as you pull yourself out of your own head.

You return to reality, and you find that Chaewon’s cumming once more. Did she announce its arrival? You don’t know. All you know is that her pussy is tightening rapidly around you, her body is shivering and shuddering against you, and her knees start giving out on her. You steady her against your chest, slowing yourself to a halt as you realise how dangerously close to the edge you are. 

When she taps you on the knee, you take it as a sign to gently lay her back down on the bed. With her belly flat against the mattress, Kim Chaewon reaches behind her and spreads her asscheeks with her fingers. She gives you the slightest of nods; you pull out of her freshly fucked pussy, point the head of your cock at the opening of her ass, and begin to press forward.

Chaewon gasps as your head presses against her tight opening, her body refusing to let you in at first—but you press forward with your hips, slowly parting her entrance. Chaewon squirms and quivers as her opening slowly parts, and soon you are finally inside her. Her hands tighten into fists, scrunching up your bed sheets; a grimace of pain overtakes her partially turned head as you penetrate her ass for the first time. She lets a long hiss escape her lips, and you lean down to kiss the back of her head in an attempt to comfort her, bringing your left hand to match hers on the bed, covering her small hand with your own.

Soon you are halfway inside her ass, and you go no further, letting her get used to the new penetration. When you stop moving, Chaewon lets out a long breath that she didn’t know she was holding.

“You okay?” You’re checking on her out of genuine concern. It’s basic human decency, you’re trying to tell yourself, but you have a sinking feeling that she’s unknowingly broken past your defences. 

“Fuck,” she spits, “fuck you’re so big inside me.”

“Do you want to—”

“Fuck no,” she snaps, “fuck, please don’t stop. I want this. I want you. I want you in my ass.”

The soft sigh you let out makes the hair atop her head flail a little as she wipes the tears from her cheeks. She isn’t crying anymore, but she certainly seems a little embarrassed that she let her emotions get the better of her. 

“Keep going.” She can’t seem to raise her head as she speaks, “Fill me, please…”

Basic human decency drives you to compliance, and so you press forward—all the while, your eyes are affixed to the back of her head, your left hand still grasping hers while she shifts around slightly, adjusting herself to take you in better. The small yelps she occasionally lets slip tells you that she’s in discomfort, but not enough to make you stop entering her asshole. It’s too late to turn back now anyway.

It felt like years, but soon you're fully inside her, buried to the hilt inside Chaewon’s ass.

You slowly draw your shaft outside of Chaewon’s tightly gripping ass for the first time, and once it is halfway out, you slowly push back inside her. She's a quivering and squirming mess, and soon you are slowly pumping in and out of her body, your pace relaxed as you enjoy the tight, hot flesh of Chaewon’s body wrapped around your cock. You’re glad that the sheer sublimity of the sensation is removing your ability to think, allowing you to steep yourself in the moment with a turmoil free mind.

Chaewon’s tightness is overwhelming to say the least. Her pussy was tight, but her ass on another level altogether. Not as wet, of course, but almost overwhelmingly tight and hot, grasping you tightly with each entrance and exit like a glove. This would be the first time you’re entering her like this, and you aren’t sure if you’re doing it right, but soon she’s taking you in and out of her ass smoothly, the pain and discomfort of your initial penetration quickly lessening and giving way to the novel, new sensation of pleasure from having her ass filled.

Chaewon lets a short, sharp gasp escape her lips when you fill her to the hilt—one that takes her by surprise given the slight look of shock that you make out on her features. You reach down with your right hand, gingerly grip her chin and tilt her face up so you can get a better look at her face. Her eyes are glazed over now with pleasure, locking to yours as you start pumping in and out of her asshole. After a while her gasps lessen and then end completely as she becomes used to the hard length pumping in and out of her butt. She reaches up with her right hand to hold yours, and she pulls it down her chin until it’s at her throat. You didn’t know she was into choking, and she had never made you do it before. Then again, you’ve never had her ass before either—there’s a first for everything.

You feel her warm neck pulsing beneath your palm. She squeezes the outside of your hand slightly, causing you to clamp a little bit around her slim neck. The slightly reduced airflow at her throat causes her ass to clench even tighter around you: succulent pleasure to your mind that makes you think you are going insane. The novelty of fucking Chaewon’s ass, your hand around her throat, the carnality, the surprising tenderness of the moment–it’s all so damn overwhelming.

“C-Chae,” you call out to her. Her gaze flickers from the wall to your eyes, and you whisper, “Do you… Do you really want me to—”

“Just fucking do it!” Chaewon gasps, barely attempting to filter the want out of her voice, “Choke me! Cum in me!”

With her permission, you were more than willing to let yourself fall over the edge at this point.

Chaewon’s hand—the one that stops your hand at her throat—tightens, as though willing you to increase your grip on her windpipe. You are still afraid of hurting her—you already feel guilty for causing her pain and discomfort (physically and emotionally). But her hand on top of yours, clasped around her throat, dismissed any worry you may have had about taking things too far. Your orgasm beckons, and the hand around Chaewon’s pale throat tightens involuntarily with each thrust in her hot, tight hole.

Do it… own me—her voice is straining—Make yours again. Choke me while you fuck my ass… Use me! Fill me… Fill my ass with your cum!

With a few final, short, hard thrusts into Chaewon’s ass, you bury yourself as deep inside her as you can before finally letting go. Thick, hot cum spurts from your shaft into Chaewon’s willing depths, her hot, tight ass squeezing and pulsing around your cock as if milking every last drop from you. As you cum, your hand around her throat involuntarily tightens, and the moan that escapes Chaewon’s throat turns into a gasp—the dark part of you takes obscene pleasure in that fact.

Both of your bodies quiver and shake as the intense pleasure of your orgasm overwhelms your senses. It seems to last forever—longer than any other orgasm you’ve had. Nothing else exists for those long seconds, aside from Chaewon’s shaking body beneath you and the hot mess you’ve made inside her.

Your cock pulses a few final times as your orgasm slowly subsides and releases the last spurts of cum into Chaewon’s body and you regretfully come down from your high. After a few more seconds of treasuring the feel of the hot, creamy mess you’ve left inside her, you slowly draw your half-soft cock out of her body. Within seconds, white, pearly semen begins to leak out of her and onto the reddened, sore cheeks of her ass. Your eyes remain glued to Chaewon’s still-quivering form as she tries and mostly fails to collect herself. Slowly, she turns on her side, her whole body heaving like she’s completed a marathon. Her inner thighs glisten, your juices and hers flow down her naked skin. It's now that you remember what you agreed to before you started: Just for tonight…

“Hey…” Her voice has a lilt as she beckons you to her side. “Cuddle with me… Just for tonight.”

There she goes again.

Yeah, right... you sigh inwardly. The way she's looking at you tells you that the feelings brought forth tonight will persist as long as she permits. Maybe, just maybe, you should have turned her down, made her come as she was, and kept her at a distance; but she’s already snuggled up in your arms by the time you finish this train of thought. She kisses you on your jaw, then on your neck, then utters a soft good night baby before nuzzling herself into the crook of your neck.

Physically and emotionally, you've made a mess of her. And, in turn, she's made a mess of you too—physically and emotionally.

But you choose to forget that, just for tonight.

***

She slips out of your apartment at God knows what time, leaving like a thief in the night and leaving a note in her wake: I took one of your shirts. Will return it if I feel like it. 

Then below the message: P.S. Forget that last night happened. Go continue being a player. 

“I… Can’t believe this bitch.” You’re leaning against the door—the place where she’d stuck on the note—as you finish reading it. You decide to crumple it and toss it away—it’s the easiest thing to forget about her anyway. 

To be clear: You had no clue what your opinion on Chaewon was anymore, nor did you know what your status with her was (though the note suggests that she’s going to return to her usual bratty behaviour). Sometimes, you wish that there could be a bright digital sign perpetually hanging above her head, providing interpretations to her erratic behaviour. 

Yea… That would be great.

Just as you throw out her bowl of fried rice, there comes a knock on your door. You’re surprised to find Hwang Yeji standing there by herself. 

“O-Oh… Yeji,” you mutter. 

“That has to be the most asinine statement I’ve ever heard,” she derides. You purse your lips and scratch the back of your head, then you ask, “Do you uh… Need to borrow something?”

Yeji sighs and shakes her head. She’s quick to get to the point, “Are you free this afternoon?”

You nod, then she tells you, “I need you to follow me somewhere today. Meet me in the lobby at 3pm.”

She’s about to leave you with that vague request, but you’re quick to ask what this is about. It’s unwonted of her to suddenly request to meet you, and you’re painfully aware (or at least you thought you were) that she knows that this is unprecedented of her. Laconic and biting as ever, she turns back to you and tells you: I need you to help me talk to someone.

“W-Who?” You’re quick to ask. She turns her back to you as she answers.

“My junior. She wants to be our saxophonist.”

_________________________

What is popping gang. I did not get a chance to look through this thoroughly, nor was I able to get anyone to beta read for me :p. Hope you didn't have your bars raised to high for this.

~Nichuuu

[chiaraanatra]

Life as We Know It | Part 2

Summary: You and Seresin unexpectedly become the caretakers of Bradley and Natasha's baby girl, Nicole. Can you two put your disdain for one another aside for Nic's sake? Based on the movie "Life as We Know It"

Warnings: Parental/character death, mentions of cops, CPS, & social work, angst, arguments, and swearing. This chapter is a sad one. no use of Y/N. Later chapters will contain mentions of parental death! Always check chapter warnings!

Word Count: 2.7k

AN: Here is part two! Thank you for all the support on part one! I hope you all enjoy!

《 part 1 || part 3 》 《 m.list || ao3 》

You vividly remember that God-forsaken phone call.

The day itself had been good, productive even. When you picked up the phone there was a chipper tone in your voice "Hello?"

The man on the other line had a very no-nonsense tone when he said your name.

Your brow furrowed, "Speaking."

The next words that came out of his mouth caused you to drop the phone. Before you knew it, you were in your car on the way to the police station.

The trek to the station was a blur, it was as if you closed your eyes and once they opened, you were there, walking up to the desk hoping to find some answers. Or, even better, that this was some sick joke. "I'm looking for Officer Kerner."

An older man in a uniform walked up to you, a sorrowful look on his face that told you everything you needed to know. "We found your name and number in her phone under emergency contacts. Now, I know this must be a lot to take in, but we need information about the nearest next of kin. Can you supply those?" His voice held a serious tone, he had a job to do.

"Umm... Both of their parents are gone, but I- I think there are some cousins..." God, this isn't actually happening.

Officer Kerner’s tone softened, "Would you like to sit down, ma'am?"

"No..." that’s when it hit you, "Oh God! They have a baby girl, Nicole Bradshaw... she wasn't... was she- was she in-" You couldn't bring yourself to ask the question.

"No. She was in the care of a babysitter. She's okay. We've placed her with CPS for the night."

"CPS...? Child Protective Services?" There was unmistakable confusion in your voice.

"They handle cases like these." When that didn't seem to ease your confusion, he continued. "Orphaned children."

Your hand covered your mouth as tears streamed down your face. Your best friend and her husband were gone, and their daughter was God knows where with some family probably scared out of her wits...

You were pulled out of your thoughts by the doors opening behind you. When you turned you were met with the sight of Seresin. You could tell by the look on his face that he knew little about what had happened.

"Seresin..." You walked over to him with open arms, tears streaming down your cheeks. You couldn't help but bury your face in his chest. Something was calming about the way he gently stroked your hair.

Seresin was at a loss but felt he needed to be strong for you. He wasn't sure where this feeling was coming from, but he continued to supply your comfort while the officer gave him a similar explanation as to what had occurred.

 After meeting at the police station, the two of you went back to your apartment to make some phone calls to try and figure out what to do next. You had been on the phone for what felt like hours.

Jake walked around your apartment becoming acquainted with your space and making little observations about your life. In the three years since you met, he realizes he's only seen you in the context of gatherings, never really on your own. The more he thought about it, he really didn't know you at all.

You were pacing, practically yelling at the phone, unnerved as to why you couldn't just pick Nic up tonight. When you got off the phone you fell onto the couch, "They know nothing and won't know anything until morning..." You let out a heavy sigh, "Outside of that, their lawyer wants to meet with us at their house to go over their will..."

He walked closer to you, finding himself seated on the arm of the couch next to you. "It's gonna be okay. She’s safe and we’ll know more in the morning." He gave your arm a little squeeze.

A small smile made its way to your face, and you pushed him a little. “You’re being too nice... It's weird…”

Seresin couldn’t help but chuckle a little at your statement. You two were usually bickering and teasing one another constantly but he knew this wasn’t the time. You two had been through too much in the last few hours.

He looked at his watch and then back at you. “You gonna be all right if I head home? I’ll meet you at their house in the morning for the meeting with the lawyer. Hopefully, we can figure out what’s gonna happen.”

“Yeah, that sounds like a good idea.” You watched as he walked towards your apartment door. Before making his exit, you called out to him, “Thank you Seresin.”

He gave you a nod before making his way out the door.

The next day, neither you nor Seresin had heard anything about Nic. Rather you were both sitting at Nat and Bradley's dining room table talking to their lawyer.

You couldn’t help but note how stereotypical the man looked. Navy suit, round glasses, slicked back salt and pepper hair. Even his voice held a certain air that screamed ‘lawyer.’ If you were being honest, you couldn't even remember the man's name.

He crossed his arms on the table looking at you both. “This is... obviously a rough time for you both and I'm sure you must have questions."

"Yes," you interrupted without a second thought. "What about Nic, what will happen to her?"

"Yes, Nicole. We have already made arrangements for her transfer. The foster family will bring her to CPS. The social worker feels like she will do best adjusting in her own environment. So, she needs to be picked up and brought here." The man shuffled through some of the papers that were strewn across the dining room table.

"Okay." Seresin nodded his head, "Who does that?"

The lawyer looked at you both in surprise, "I'm sorry. Did they not talk to you about their guardianship arrangements...?"

"No." You and Seresin said in unison before looking at each other.

The man rubbed his temples and shook his head a little. "Alright, well. When preparing their will we discussed, in the unlikely event that they should both pass, whom they would like to appoint as Nicole's guardians. They named you. Both of you.

"What?" Your voices once again rang in unison.

"They picked us? Both of us together?" Seresin’s voice was filled with disbelief.

"I know this is probably not how you wanted to start a family."

"There's been a misunderstanding. We are not together or anything.” You tried to wrap your head around what was being said but the pieces weren’t coming together.

“Yeah! They tried to set us up on a blind date years ago and we never even made it to the restaurant," Seresin let out a breathy, nervous laugh.

You rolled your eyes at the reminder of your first encounter with Seresin, “I don't even know if you'd call it a date. He was an absolute dick; he made a booty call right in front of me before we even left for the restaurant.”

"Look," the lawyer interrupted. "I know this is overwhelming. Believe me, I tried to convince them not to go through with it, but they chose you. Now, there are options. Firstly, you can say no. Keep in mind this is a child, not some puppy you got for Christmas that you can take back to the shelter if things don't work out. This is a big commitment."

"Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God." Seresin was spiraling.

You took a deep breath and cleared your throat. "Options. What kind of options?"

"Yes, well there are some cousins. It's possible that one of them would be willing to take guardianship."

Your mind spun with ideas and before you could fully flesh any of them out, you spoke "What if one of us, on our own, chose to honor Nat and Bradley's wishes? Or both of us, hypothetically?"

The lawyer gave you a look that said he hoped your hypothetical was not one you were actually considering based on how he saw the two of you interact. "They named you so it's just a matter of setting up a court hearing to grant you custody, that's about it."

Your mind was spinning, and you couldn't hear a word the man in front of you was saying. Something about finances? Maybe this was a dream and at any moment you would wake up. You closed your eyes, squeezing them shut as hard as you could, but when you opened them, the same sight sat before you.

The lawyer continued, "But Iet's not get ahead of ourselves. Okay? Let's just focus on Nicole."

"Yes." You nodded.

"Right." Seresin's voice cracked ever so slightly.

"I suggest the two of you move in here in the interim. Again, the social worker thinks Nicole will do best in her own environment.

"You want us to live together?" Disbelief rang through the voice of the man sitting next to you.

The lawyer shook his head a little, "Yes, just for now. Again for Nicole. Until you both decide what you wanna do.

Nat what have you gotten me into...?

You felt like you were going to pass out or throw up. At the rate you were going, both seemed likely.

The two of you walked up to the desk of CPS. Seresin stood next to you. He looked stoic but you could see something in his eyes. Apprehension? Fear? You weren't sure what it was, but it was slowly breaking his strong facade.

You swallowed thickly before speaking. "Hello, we're here to pick up Nicole Carole Bradshaw?"

The woman at the desk nodded before getting up and rifling through some paperwork. You took a shaky breath and Seresin placed a soft hand on the small of your back. You weren't sure what to make of this softer side of Seresin, but your mind didn't allow you to deviate further into those thoughts. You were here for Nic, for Nat, for Bradley...

The woman placed some papers on the counter. "I need both of you to sign here, here, and here." Once signed she directed you to sit in a small waiting area, "She'll be out shortly."

'Shortly' felt like a lifetime, but, in actuality, it was no more the 5 minutes or so. Seresin was the first to lay eyes on her, patting your shoulder, "There she is."

You both practically ran to meet the social worker who carried an exhausted-looking Nic in her arms, "Hi. sweet girl." Nic was placed in your arms. The little girl yawned, tears coming to her eyes. "Oh, honey... " When Nic started to cry, your heart broke. “I know. I know…" you placed a soft kiss on her forehead.

“Hey pretty girl, look what I got.” Seresin waved her favorite bunny plush in front of her, but it did little to quell the girl's cries.

She reached out for Seresin, small, grabby hands trying to find comfort in the tall man. You quickly took notice, "You want Uncle Sese? Here..." You passed the little girl over and her wails were quelled. He did have a way of calming her quickly. You looked at the sleepy, teary-eyed girl in his arms. She looked so much like Nat and Bradley. You couldn't help the tears that gathered in your own eyes, "Okay. Umm, we should get her home."

By the time you got back to the house, it was after 9. You had tried to put Nic to bed, but once you set her down, she would start crying. So, there you were, sitting on the living room couch bouncing Nic on your leg as she chewed the ears of her stuffed bunny.

Seresin was pacing about the room. At the rate he was going, you thought he might pace a trench into the rug, “They definitely didn't think this through."

Your mind was in another place, "We need to establish a sleep schedule... That's very important." Nat had always talked about sleep schedules when she was pregnant, but you weren't sure if those ever panned out.

"What?" Seresin looked at you in disbelief. How could you be talking about sleep schedules at a time like this?

His tone brought you out of your thoughts, "I'm sorry, what did you say?"

He rolled his eyes, "I said they didn't think this through. Did Nat say anything to you? Or Brad?"

"They didn't tell me anything..." You let out a sigh looking down at a still fussy Nic bouncing on your leg.

"I'm sorry, this is not the kind of thing you forget to mention. 'Hey, man! Work’s really been crazy. You see the new Top Gun movie? Oh! And by the way, if I die, I'm gonna leave you with my kid!' Common that's just messed up!"

You couldn’t deny the oddness of them telling you nothing, but you felt a need to defend your friends, "I-I mean Nat was a planner. She always needed to have a plan and I guess we are part of that plan."

"You wanna walk me through this plan? Are we supposed to Iive in this house together, both sleep-deprived and taking care of a child? Sounds like a compelling psych experiment. Assuming you and I can even afford to pay for this place."

"The lawyer said the mortgage is covered..."

Seresin took no time interrupting you, "Yeah, the mortgage is the least of our worries. What about the upkeep? The utilities, the taxes? You have any idea the monthly on a place like this? Brad was a junior partner. I don't make that kind of cash! And what do you do? Listen to people bitch for a living.

You couldn’t help be offended at his assumption of your work, "I'm a partner psychologist at a private practice. I do pretty well...  And I don't listen to people bitch, I help people with real problems."

"Yeah? WeII, raising a child is not the same as listening to adults bitch about their feelings."

"I didn't say it was!"

Seresin threw his arms in the air, "Kids are messy, they bite, they pee on everything. They're basically dogs, except I don't have to worry about a dog Iicking a goddamn electrical socket." Seresin’s hands moved dramatically as he explained himself. "Oh, and pray tell, how does Nic fit in with you meeting a guy, getting married, and having a kid of your own? Have you thought about that? I mean you're cute but a woman with a baby is gonna have a hard time competing for the few guys who don't suck."

You looked up in disbelief, "And what do you know about dating? I'm sure the closest you get to a ‘date’ is your bedroom after picking some girl up at the bar!"

"I know that in the dating world, you wouldn't be considered single. You would be considered complicated, beyond complicated."

"You don't know anything about me."

Seresin didn't skip a beat, "I know that you can't open a childproof drawer."

You were taken aback slightly, "They can be tricky- that's beside the point! Why are you trying so hard to convince me not to help her?"

"I'm thinking about what's best for her."

"No, don't get it twisted. You're thinking about what's best for you!"

"I promise you; she is at the forefront of my mind right now. I'm trying to do what's best for her. And let me tell you, sweetheart, we're not it!"

"They loved Nic more than anything in the entire world. Out of everyone, Seresin, they picked us…" you paused when you noticed Nic starting to squirm in your arms. Her tummy began to make noises and as you pulled her away to get a better look at her, she spit up all over your chest. You tried to take a calming breath looking down at the little girl smiling up at you.

As much as Seresin wanted to laugh, this was the reality of the situation. "Do you honestly think we're what's best for her?" He handed you a towel and grabbed Nic, holding her close to his chest.

《 part 3 》

As always, feedback, likes, comments, and reblogs are appreciated!

Top Gun Taglist: @callsign-viper @luckyladycreator2 @saturnsbabe69 @desert-fern @pono-pura-vida @dempy @t-rexs-world @averyhotchner @drxgxnslxyer @daisydark

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𝑊𝑎𝑛𝑛𝑎 𝑏𝑒 𝑡𝑎𝑔𝑔𝑒𝑑? 𝐿𝑒𝑡 𝑚𝑒 𝑘𝑛𝑜𝑤 ℎ𝑒𝑟𝑒 💜

[dipperscavern]

hiiii! the anon who requested the Mike x fem!reader fic here. please don't apologise, I can totally understand😭😭 the show's too addictive, I binged watched the first few seasons really quick too, you can take your time🫶🏾

HII IM SO SORRY FHIS TOOK SO LONG GRR. honestly, i really struggled w this 😭 i didn’t make it very long or defined (i wanted this to set the tone of their relationship), and i left it pretty open ended (on purpose) so it could be built off of in other continuations as maybe a clientsdaughter!reader 🙂‍↕️thank u sm for the ask & i hope u enjoy!! (this is ass)

mike ross x fem!clientsdaughter!reader

mike had learned a countless amount of knowledge since joining the firm. how to talk to people, how to negotiate, how to work, how to win. along with this, he also learned the workings of the office itself — more so the people that were in it.

kyle talks to his girlfriends throughout the day. it’s often mike can catch him leaned back in his chair, not-so-discreetly checking his phone, eyebrows raising as he clicks on the selfie he was sent.

louis keeps his favorite breakfast bars in the top cabinet. rachel chews her lip when she’s thinking. the fax machine only listens to donna — don’t mention if harvey’s having a bad hair day, he knows.

oh. and don’t sleep with clients.

not getting involved with clients was a general rule of thumb. according to harvey, the less emotion involved, the better. even so, harvey himself was guilty of sleeping with a few clients — after business was done, of course. but that was different. harvey was harvey, and mike was a first year associate, already tap dancing on thin ice. he could absolutely not afford to break any rules — no matter how unspoken they might be.

truly, it was all going fine. until he met you.

you & your father are in the racehorse industry. famous for the record breaking times your horses submit (& the world-class conditions they’re always in), thousands come to the races to bet on them. your family has been breeding, training, and racing horses for decades, and your father loves his job. there’s only one issue.

he’s currently being sued for “wrongful termination” by an ex employee. the employee mistreated multiple horses during his time working for you & your father. once you both found out, he was gone.

now, 4 months later, when your most famous horse “knights honor” has died, the employee is claiming the horse was milkshaked before his races (he was not).

“Milkshaked? What the hell is that?”

harvey’s voice carried through his office as jessica presented the case to him & mike. your father was a friend to her, and it was important that harvey got this done. mike remembers the article he read years ago on racehorses when knights honor won his first championship.

“In the context of horse racing and illegal substances, a milkshake is any compound or combination of compounds administered to a horse, pre-race, for the purpose of causing.. metabolic alkalosis of the blood and extracellular fluid of that horse. Although, a previous widely used method to ensure placing times, milkshakes are a prohibited practice on race day in all U.S. jurisdictions.”

harvey and jessica exchange looks between themselves & mike. they're about to raise questions when donna's voice crackles through harvey's phone.

"Translation: Its when the horses are given a “milkshake” of different drugs before a race. It can kill fatigue and improve their endurance."

all heads look down to the phone, then at donna's desk. donna's already looking their way, of course, and she swallows under their field of vision. she shrugs.

"What? I can't.. watch tv?"

she abruptly puts the phone down, turning her chair around to type on her computer. jessica clears her throat.

"Tom is an old friend. He's genuine."

harvey interrupts. "You need me to make it go away.”

“No. This could tarnish his entire reputation… his life’s work. I need you to kill this thing in its tracks. Get it done.”

with that, jessica turns & exists the office. harvey sighs, skimming over the case file jessica dropped on his desk. he looks at mike.

“Find the daughter. Find out everything — previous arrests, divorces, a stolen tangerine from publix- I wanna know about it.”

mike nods, offering a-

“Yes, captain,”

(which makes harvey give him an exasperated look) before he retreats back to his cubicle, moving to start his manhunt. donna winks as he passes her desk.

꧁——————————————————꧂

“No, he doesn’t.”

you can sense the presence of the associate approaching behind you. you quickly thank the man working the stand as he hands you your pretzel, and you turn to face harvey’s right-hand. mike ross.

“I- You don’t even know what I was about to say.”

“Yes, I do.”

he’s cute. pretty blue eyes, a photographic memory, and a boyish charm that you can’t say you’re immune to.

“You were about to ask if he’s had any previous arrests. No, never.”

mike shakes his head. “Sorcery. Speeding tickets?”

you turn to look at him with an exasperated look. “No, officer.” he smiles.

“How did you know? That I’d ask.”

you shrug. “Ancient blood magic.”

a few moments of silence pass, and he’s silently moving his head in tune with his thoughts — like he actually believes you. you decide on mercy.

“It’s the first question lawyers always ask.”

“Ah. Been through this before?”

you shrug.

“Do you always stalk your clients?”

he doesn’t miss a beat. “Only the pretty ones- a hobby of mine.”

you hum, breaking off a piece of your pretzel and handing it to him. he sighs, leaning back.

“Oh you sweet, sweet angel.”

you both continue your walk to pearson/hardman, wanting to get there early to prep for the deposition today. mike breaks the silence once he’s done chewing.

“Do you always feed your lawyers?”

“Only the cute ones,” you break off another piece, handing it to him. “Its a hobby of mine.”

꧁——————————————————꧂

the elevator rings, signifying the end to your journey. mike is in disbelief as you step out of the elevator — mind trying to wrap around your last statement.

“What- are you serious?”

“As a heart attack.”

mike moves to catch up with you. “Okay, multimillion-dollar horse racing company, and you just.. have no security cameras? Zero?”

you turn to face him, giving him a defiant look that makes his heart flutter.

“I don’t see any cameras around here.”

as you approach the glass-doored conference room, mike opens the door for you.

“Touché.”

you shoot him a look across your shoulder before you move to greet your father, already waiting. mike pauses outside, staring, as you hug your father, no doubt offering some sort of reassurance.

“No.”

mikes head snaps toward the voice, harvey’s un-foreseen presence making him jump a little. mike looks around a bit.

“I.. didn’t even-“

harvey points a finger at mike, then at you, then slowly wags it back and forth for dramatics. mike sighs, looking around and putting his hands in his pockets, waiting for his scolding to be done.

“Harvey-“

“Uh uh.”

“Harvey.”

harvey continues his finger wag. “Micheal.”

“Harvey.”

harvey walks backwards towards the door, opening it with his free hand. “Don’t.. do it.”

mike rolls his eyes, following harvey into the room.

okay. don’t get with the funniest, most beautiful woman you’ve ever seen. got it. easy.

easy. right?

the look you give him as he sits down proves him otherwise.

[defectivehero]

dialogue

Sometimes, I hate dialogue. Sometimes, I love it. Will I ever be perfect at it? Absolutely not. Are there a few things I've learned as I write more dialogue? ... Yes. Here are some of those things:

[as always, no pressure to use any of these tips. writing doesn't have a "one size fits all" formula.]

Conversations aren't always super smooth, equal exchanges where everything is reciprocated. Sometimes, individuals cut each other off. Sometimes, one individual is doing most of the talking while the other is mostly listening. Think about your characters and what is unique about them. Then, embrace that in your writing! Things like: a) answering questions two paragraphs later, b) dodging the subject and then coming back to it, and c) saying one thing but meaning another are just a few examples of ways to liven up dialogue. If a character is super energetic and eager, they may dominate the conversation (unknowingly or knowingly). If a character is more withdrawn, they may pause before speaking, speak in smaller fragments, or elect not to speak at all. The unique personalities and circumstances of your character can show through in dialogue.

Consider more than just the dialogue. This is probably my favorite thing to do, because sometimes, I just can't get the words to be perfect. And that's okay! Often, a sentiment is better portrayed through a description of a person's body language—think of gestures, facial expressions, etc—than through written dialogue. Think about a character who has gotten sick as an example. There's two ways you can approach their dialogue: 1) focus on the words they're speaking and use descriptions as accessories, or 2) focus on their body language and use dialogue as an accessory. I often find myself thinking that dialogue has to be the main focus, but it doesn't! For the sick character example, I try thinking about how they look and how they may feel. Often times, those kinds of things can also inspire dialogue! In this case, the sick character may: speak with a more raspy tone; have trouble getting the words out; have an interrupted flow of speech because of sniffles or coughs; shiver with cold or sweat; or have a hazy look to their eyes. Details like these often take away some of the pressure I put on myself to have the perfect dialogue.

Dive into the mechanics of the person's voice. Is their voice raspy, gravelly, deep, high? Is there an underlying emotion showing through? How about the volume—are they speaking loudly, softly, or somewhere in the middle? Do they accentuate their statements in a certain way, such as breaking their statements up into shorter phrases with pauses in between?

Think about the setting. I say something along these lines in virtually every writing tips post, but I think the setting is super important and a great way to add some flavor to a dialogue. Where are your characters? Is there anyone nearby—and if so, how do they respond? Do the characters drop to a whisper to avoid eavesdropping or do they carry on as normal? How about the place where the interaction occurs—is it traditionally loud, quiet, or somewhere in the middle? What time of day is it—does the conversation take place in the early morning (think raspy voices from sleep) or late at night (quieter to avoid noise)? Perhaps it's in midday, but the surrounding area is a street bustling with activity?

Explore the context behind the interaction. Why is the conversation occurring? Is it a purpose or task-focused interaction? Is it context-specific? Are there certain elements of language that can only be understood by certain people (think inside jokes or language specific to a place/occurrence)? Also, evaluate the importance of the interaction taking place and go from there. If you're stuck on a part that isn't necessarily inherent to the story (which I usually am), consider shifting to description instead! You can also use dialogue to reference past occurrences, if that makes things easier. Think of a character getting home from work and speaking to their partner. Their partner asks them about their day and the character explains it: "My boss said..." In this example, you would be able to bypass writing the actual interaction between the boss and the character, and instead introduce it to the audience through the character's retelling of it.

I hope these help! Sorry if they're confusing—dialogue is definitely difficult! Each writer will have their own process, and I'm not claiming that mine is picture-perfect.

[honeyatsu]

Loner 4 (Junpei x Reader)

PREV | Masterlist

TW: mention of suicide

a/n:

Hiiii ~ T_T it's been so long since i've written lol! I am sorry if its not good....im kinda rusty! I found this draft after trying to fix my laptop and going thru my things....I figured why not finish it!!! :D I loved working on this fic even tho the only thing done is the outline/draft...i missed writing so im just getting back into a hobby I once loved again ((: I am sooo sorry if my writing style is no longer enjoyable lol but only way to get better after a too long break is to keep writing :D !!!

You decide to take matters into your own hands when Junpei doesn’t return to school the next two weeks – literally.

If the empty desk next to you and continuous lonely lunches weren’t offensive enough, he had the audacity to not even open your texts anymore. Leaving your texts on delivered as opposed to the checked read notification you would often see desperately checking your phone at the end of the day, along with sending your calls straight to voicemail. Sometimes you think you would feel less offended if he just blocked you.

So, you generously speak to your school advisor, showing concern in your friends’ absence and inevitable fate of falling behind – you offer to take his missing work to him and help him catch up, not a complete lie. You weren’t one to be ghosted— ever. A shot to your ego mixed with a concern of your best friend, you decided if he was going to ignore you, you would just go to him. Even if it meant getting his address through the school, no matter how creepy it sounded, whatever context you would put it in.

“Are you taking those to Junpei?” you turn to see your underclassman and teammate, Ino, staring at you with her large doe hazel-eyes, her naturally flushed cheeks spreading from one corner of her face to another.

Cute, Ino was cute. You offer her a simple nod, the white pages your fingers were buried under slightly slipping from your grip, Ino catching it, leaning it towards you again before they could fall. “Do you want me to come and help?” Her tone was sincere and kind, you could say her voice was almost as angelic as her face.

Your stomach churned, body becoming stiff as she stood in front of you, batting her doe-eyes at you with a smile. She annoyed you.

“It’s fine. Gotta go.” You mutter, gripping onto the folders and sheets tightly, speeding your way past her.

It’s lively here, the area you need to walk through in order to get to his home. There are students, chatting, taking up the streets and shops as they lounge around after school. When you walked passed Tatsu Ramen, you tried to not let the bitterness linger around, seeing familiar (yet not so friendly) faces eating there. You flick your tongue against your teeth, wondering if Junpei decided to finally stop ignoring you, where would you two go now. You try to avoid them, quickly shuffling past them, using the stack to cover your face.

The walk wasn’t a short one, nor a long one. It was far enough to make your ankles ache, holding onto the heavy workload – you weren’t sure if you felt bad for the missing work he was going to have to do, or the scolding you were mentally rehearsing to give him.

Either way, it was a headache he deserved, you thought.

The lecture that wasn’t ready was going to have to come sooner rather than later, as you spot him walking toward his home, his clothes baggy and even from the distance you were at, he was more relaxed than you’ve seen him ever be at school. You were at the top of a small street-hill that came before his house, the slope only aiding your speed as you ran towards him, shouting his name, gripping the folder and paperwork that were fighting to slip through your hands.

The closer you get to him, the sloppier your moves are, your nerves reaching all the way to the tip of your toes, the crack on the street not helping as you trip over it. Junpei’s arms reaches out, stopping you from falling into his chest with both hands placed on your shoulder. You stare him in the eye, chest heaving and breath loud and messy, you don’t care that you’re practically blowing your breath into his face. Seeing him felt like seeing a ghost — but seeing his wide eyes turn into a small scowl felt like seeing a ghost who just punched you in the chest.

“What are you doing here?” he asked, his eyes squinting as he observed the piles of work placed on your hand. He scoffs at the sight.

“You’re not in the right to ask questions! Do you even know how a phone works?” you huff out, trying to catch your breath and put your adrenaline at ease.

A look of shame left as quickly as it came as he let go of you giving you a slight shove, his lips pouting as he faced the opposite direction of your face, “Don’t tell me you’re here because you’re worried about my coursework.”

“Well, for us to graduate together, you kind of need to pass. I just thought I’d do you a favor.” Your lower your arms to remove the work that was covering half of your face, displaying your frown even though he was refusing to look at you. You take a deep breath as you contemplate your next sentence. “Plus, I was wo –”

“Us? There is no us,” You were interrupted anyways.

Your mouth opens but no words come out, Junpei finally turns to you. Looking into your eyes, challenging you, just daring you to say something next. You feel the heat of embarrassment rise to your cheeks – or maybe it’s anger, you weren’t exactly sure how you felt at the moment. At the sight of someone who was supposed to be your best friend staring at you with such disgust, almost as if he regretted getting to know you at all.

“You’re all the same.” He started out. His eyes never left yours. “Did you know we’ve gone to the same school for years? By chance you finally noticed me, and because you were too afraid to sit in the front. You think that makes us friends?” His dark gaze was going right through you, burning. The tension couldn’t be cut with a knife as he tried reading you, scanning you for any reaction.

You give him one, taking a slight step back, mouth thinned. You’re still holding on to the stack of papers, crumpling them between your fingers. He waits for you to reply, but you don’t.

“That’s not what bothers me. Your friends, they’ve been picking on me for years. How are you just now noticing? What – because you think we’re friends you finally think I’m worthy of being saved?” He gives a dry, coarse laugh. “You’re no different from the rest. You think you are, because you became friends with poor Junpei, right? You finally decide not to turn a blind eye, barley. The same way everyone else pretends to not notice, you did too! You let them get away with it. It’s not just me that gets picked on! And unless they’re your friends, unless they’re worthy of kindness, you just let them! Everyone does! Teachers, other students, you!”

You don’t dare to speak; you simply shove the assignments to his arms. You don’t look up, you don’t want him to see your lips quiver at his words – you don’t want him to see you fighting to keep your eyes dry, fighting to tune him out. Your attempts fail you, feeling your own wet lashes against your cheek, a single, suppressed tear managing to escape.

“I never needed you. I never needed your pity, I never needed you to save me!”

Of course, he’s mad at you. You don’t know what you did, but you figure that you abandoning him when there was something clearly wrong the other day had something to do with it. You knew something was wrong, yet you still left. And you feel guilty, so guilty for being such a bad friend, just like he says. You feel guilty, thinking that you could just march to him when you’re the one who is in the wrong. You weren’t a good friend, and Junpei knew his worth. You were convinced you were in the right, that it was okay for you to be mad at your friend for abandoning you, but you abandoned him first. You’re ready to turn your heel, turn back and leave him alone for good, and you almost do.

Almost.

“What’s going on here?” A strong voice asked from behind you. You turned your head to be met with a tall slender woman, short black hair, and holding a cigarette in her left hand.

His tone changes, along with his facial expression. His eyebrow twitches when he realizes who has arrived (at the worst possible time, for him); It did not take you necessarily long to realize who she was, her and Junpei practically sharing the same face. If you weren’t so hurt and angry, you could imagine how humiliated you would feel. Weeks of begging Junpei to let you come over, introduce you to his family — and here you are, face to face with the woman who brought your favorite person into this world (even if he was being an ass right now); snotty nosed, eyes glossy, and an ugly tight facial expression because no, you didn’t want him to see you cry.

“She’s bringing my missing work, just a classmate–”

You cut him off, introducing yourself by giving your name, “I’m his best friend.” you snuck in, bowing to his mother while grabbing a work folder, pointing to it. “I brought his classwork. And being honest, I was concerned. I wanted to see for myself that he was okay.” Considering the fact that he seemed to forget how to use his phone and turned into an asshole, you thought to yourself, but you knew to leave that thought to yourself, not wanting to push any of his mother’s buttons, determined to make a good first impression.

“The ramen girl?”

Your eyebrow twitches, turning to Junpei. It almost shocks you, how after his speech of how cruel he tried to make you out to be, this is what offends you. “Your mother knows me as…. the ramen girl?” Junpei stares at you in disinterest and shrugs.

“It’s not often I get to meet a friend, let alone a best friend.” She grins in amusement, “Do you wanna come in and help him catch up with work?”

“Mom, not necessary.” Junpei mutters quietly.

“It wouldn’t be a problem at all!” You chirped in response, grinning from ear to ear as you follow them into their home, ignoring Junpei’s face twisted in irritation.

Their home is welcoming, fit for a small family of two. His mother (you find out her name is Nagi), goes straight to her fridge, taking out a bottle of beer while settling on her counter.

“I appreciate you doing this for him. I understand school isn’t for everyone and honestly, it isn’t as big as you kids make it seem. “ She takes a sip of her beer before continuing, “but I would be lying if I said I didn’t appreciate this. Or you. I’m just glad I finally got to meet the girl who’s worked wonders you’re not even aware of.”

The praise makes you flush — your body heating up. You swiftly look towards Junpei’s direction, seeing his face tinted red, from his cheeks to the tip of his ears. He was avoiding his mothers gaze along with yours, looking to the side and pouting, arms crossed. He looked like an angry toddler, and you would laugh, normally — if you didn’t feel he hated you at this moment.

“ — Oh, I’m sorry, am I keeping you guys waiting?” His mother replies with a grin, “You’re free to go on, help your best friend catch up on his work!” She takes both of you, leading your way to his bedroom with her palm on both backs, lightly shoving you through the door.

Junpei is standing beside you, sheepishly, his guilt showering his face as he sees you softly close the door behind you and fist your palms as a way to calm yourself down. You’re nervous, and you can tell he is too, the blush never leaving his face. And as awkward and unpredictable this current situation is (meeting his mom in the middle of a fight and having her throw you into his bedroom, awkward is an understatement), you still know there are things you need to talk about. You slowly take a few steps towards him, each step causing you to take a deep breath before you trap him in a tight hug.

“I should’ve been a better friend.” You mutter into his chest. Still holding onto him, you look up at him and nearly laugh at his surprised expression. “Please don’t think you don’t matter to me. Or that I feel bad for you. I mean – ouch – because of how you judge my character. You are my friend. I care about you, a lot. And I’m sorry for making you feel otherwise.”

The gold locket you usually kept hidden in your shirt was brought out, it felt so delicate in between your fingers, but the feelings and memories with what was inside laid heavy in your heart. You took one last, slow, deep breath before you opened the heart-chapped locket, revealing the photo of your deceased father. “He was bullied at work. My dad. They treated him horribly, told him he wasn’t worthy of being man of the house, or something like that.”

Don’t cry, You try to tell yourself, don’t cry.

“Well, one day it all got to him. And he decided it was easier to leave me and my mom, than to ‘burden us with his pathetic excuse of a husband and father’. At least that’s what he said in the letter. If he asked me, I would’ve said he was great.”

You sigh, closing up the locket and placing it back into your shirt, “I should’ve paid more attention, you’re right. No one wants to believe people are bad, or people with hearts can be capable of being so cruel. I always thought people were just people when my dad died. When I read his note, it was so sad. Life seemed so dimmed in his perspective. I guess I didn’t want to experience my life like that, I became ignorant to those around me, especially my shitty friends. I was around bullies and was too dumb to even see it.”

Your arms quickly found their way around his waist, bringing your head to his chest and looking up at him, the small tears that still haven’t fallen glistening in between your eyelashes. “What I’m trying to say with all of this is, I’m sorry. I understand what they do is fucked up, and I’m sorry for just staying silent. My ignorance isn’t an excuse, it was never okay. I won’t let anyone hurt you. And I’m not enabling those friendships any longer. You’re my friend Junpei, I care about you.”

Junpei wraps his arms around you, pressing his body tightly against yours. He would’ve never guessed you felt as bad as you did — he would have never imagined you having to go through something so tragic, yet remained so strong, so willing, so vulnerable to the world around you.

It’s silent, the forgiveness that’s communicated between the two of you. After the embrace you look up at him, your eyes still glistening but your smile turns into a small curve, your teeth slightly showing before you start giggling, hitting his chest. He follows you after — laughing at how vulnerable and serious you two were with one another, and he’s happy, because this is new. He hasn’t experienced a true friendship, a falling out, or making up after, being vulnerable.

The next few hours are peaceful as you two sit sprawled out on his bed with the textbooks and folders with weeks worth of school work. You promised to help catch him up as long as he promised to stop skipping class and ignoring you, especially during times he needs people most.

Junpei spends five minutes staring at a problem, not quite understanding what he was supposed to do. He calls your name for help, but you don’t respond. “I really need help right now,” he states, bringing his attention to you, lifting his eyes to meet yours; His eyes softened at the view in front of him, the world around you became a blur — you being the focus point, the soft beating his heart slowly becoming rapid, his body becoming flushed seeing you laid across his bed, your mouth agape and slight drool dripping from the side. He stares and thinks to himself, he’s always thought you were pretty, but this would have to be the prettiest he’s seen you.

He slowly lifts himself off the bed, tip-toeing around to make sure he doesn’t make the slightest noise while going to your side, being sure to not wake you from your sleep.

Junpei takes your leg that was hanging from the edge and takes the piles of work spread across his bed and neatly places them onto his desk, sitting beside your sleeping figure and taking his blanket, covering your body. He then lays beside you, on top of the covers so there is a barrier between the two of you. His eyes trace the shape of your body, looking at the little details and appreciating every blemish, every texture, every line on your face. Without even realizing he brought his face closer to yours, in awe at how at peace you look laying beside him after all he’s put you through.

He takes a moment, taking in a deep breath as he decides to swallow his pride, whispering an apology.

And to his surprise, he hears you accept his apology faintly, right before your quiet snores echo around the room. He smiles at the sight, laying down besides you

As you two fell asleep with one beside one another, close but not close enough, his mother barged in, holding a tray of tea, about to offer some until she noticed the sight before her.

She then smiled to herself, wanting to wake you guys up, or just take a picture to tease you two with it later. She decides to let you two have this moment, because something tells her there would be more to come.

₊✩‧₊˚౨ৎ˚₊✩‧₊

When winter comes, it comes quietly — the snow falling sneaking up on the world, the same way your feelings for Junpei seemed to. You don’t exactly remember when his presence alone would have your heart beating out of your chest, you don’t remember when you would feel heat rise in your face when he would give you a simple compliment, but it made you uneasy — and confused. Because he was your friend, later on you realized that these physical setbacks weren’t supposed to happen around your friend.

Your friendship with Junpei slowly got better, it was like starting from square one, but he got comfortable fast — you’d say things were getting to how they once were, but you’d argue that they were better. Junpei smiled more, he laughed more, he even got bold and would initiate physical contact with you. It should make you happy, that he has become more open, more willing to shed his light not only to you, but others as well. He developed a better friendship with his club members, he even started to acknowledge people that even shocked you, and it should make you happy.

It should.

One moment you’re urging Junpei to smile more. He’s president of a club filled with classmates with the same interests as him, you jokingly tell him if he can handle being your friend he should have no problem making more. One moment you’re skipping down the halls, holding a bag with a surprise for him – a gift, there was no special event coming up, but you saw the item and thought of him. One moment you’re excited to start off his day with one of his warm laughs, and wide smile you’ve come to adore – and now, you’re trying to be still as your legs wobble, witnessing something that makes your stomach turn in discomfort.

Junpei is laughing – an honest, joyful, (almost too joyful) laugh. The gift bag almost drops to the ground, but you gripped it tightly as it nearly slipped out of your palms, your jaw suddenly tensed up, and you feel like even blinking would be impossible. His eyes are practically glistening as he looks down at the pink hair, doe-eyed girl you knew all too well. She looks up at him, reaching towards his upper left arm, grabbing it after giggling something you couldn’t make out to him. Junpei doesn’t flinch, in fact, he doesn’t react at all. He accepts her physical touch as if it was the most natural thing to him, and something in you bursts. It was as if a fire was casted in your chest, as if the devil himself pushed you far enough to run into Junpei’s back, nearly pushing him further into Ino if you weren’t able to catch the back of his school shirt before he got a chance to fall.

Before you realize what you’ve done, you feel Ino’s large eyes on you, a curious look on her face quickly switching to her sweet smile that has the rest of the school on the palm of her hands, and Junpei looking back at you curiously. You remove your hand from his shirt, slowly bringing it to your side, you lower your gaze to the floor, gripping your gift, wishing to any god out there to have you disappear from the scene itself.

“We have things to go over, Junpei.” You try to state as calmly as possible, but it comes out bitter, a shaky voice followed by a nervous hand reaching for his wrist, not waiting for a response before you attempt to drag him to the opposite direction of Ino.

You peak over his shoulder when he doesn’t move, seeing Ino hold onto his other wrist, keeping him in place. You try to imagine how this looks to the classmates around you, Junpei in between of two classmates, both pulling him into the opposite direction. You try to imagine the amount of self control it would take to not grab one of the most popular first years by the head and drag her down the hall without it becoming a big scandal.

Your breath hitches as Ino looks you in the eye, her smile never faulting. You watch her with a blank stare, your eyes staring at her hand gripping his wrist until she drops it. When you look up she looks back at you innoccently, as if she didn’t just send you into an internal war with her. “I asked Junpei to the Lantern festival.” Ino announces, clear and to the point, her eyes staring directly into yours.

“Just…just the two of you?” You blink back, letting go of the grip you have on him. Your gaze switched from staring directly at her to Junpei, “Did you say yes?”

“No!” Ino laughs out, and it pains you to admit how melodic it was, how you get why Junpei is so comfortable with someone he barely knows. “Chifuyu and Hori are coming. I didn’t want to be the only girl, so I asked Junpei to come along with you. You know them right? They’re in your art classes.”

“I’d like to go.” Junpei states softly. You try not to glare at him, huffing to yourself as you mutter back “whatever.” You pull Junpei rougher, which leads Ino to let go as you drag him into the empty art club room.

The room is silent for the first few minutes. The sound of you ruffling through your bag to get things out and place them onto the desk is the only thing that echoes through the room. The two of you avoid eyecontact with one another – Junpei looking at anywhere but you while playing with his hands, you take out pictures you’ve printed, sprawling them across the desk, neatly lining them up to one another.

A majority of them were selfies of the two of you. If the air around the two of you wasn’t as heavy due to the last encounter, you probably would’ve smiled – chuckled, even. These photos were the visual documenting of the friendship the two of you shared, a visual timeline of seeing his comfortablility with you. From looking awkwardly at the camera (you were lucky if you even got a smile), to some blurry pictures of him shying away, they blossomed into him

“You know,” you started off, pretending to look into the pictures as if you were inspecting them, “When I said you should show the more open side of you more often….I didn’t think you’d do it so easily. Especially with other girls.” You try to sound nonchalant. You try to make it sound like a friend teasing another one.

“I – I just,”

“It’s not a problem. It’s just crazy. Lookin’ at these pictures, y’know? How long it took you to get comfortable with me but you talk to Ino as if you’ve known her for years.” You don’t know what you’re implying or why you’re implying anything at all – Junpei is just your friend and it’s not not fair to act like you own him, that you’re the only girl in the world he should be laughing with.

It shouldn’t bother you that he’s getting more social thanks to his friendship with you. This should be a happy moment. But you can’t help the way the memory of him laughing so easily with her causes your skin to burn, or the heavy fall you felt in your chest when you saw Ino’s hand touch him. The red flush that spread around his face didn’t make it better either.

“I feel like I should say sorry.” Junpei admits, “But I don’t know why I’m apologizing.”

“You don’t need to.” You mumble to yourself, still refusing to look up at him. You sigh as you’re shuffling through the pictures, none of them working for you. The selfies themselves were nice, two friends just savoring memories with one another. Staring at them all heeds the realization that these pictures were nothing but mere proof of your friendship with one another, the word friends sitting grudgingly in your mind. “None of these are good enough.”

You feel Junpei tower over you, his eyes similarly scanning the photos you’ve laid out. He brings his arm out, it hovers over you, lighty grazing your shoulder as he grabs a photo that’s caught his eye. Your breath hitches when his chest presses up against your back due to the movement – your body freezing, this physical contact alone having your breath to become uneasy, using every ounce of your strength to not lose the balance onto your legs. Hesitantly, you turn your head to look up at him, his dark eyes glistening, staring at what he’s just picked up with nothing less than stars in his eyes. He brings the picture closer to him, unintentionally wrapping his arm around you, pulling you closer to him.

Your eyes shift towards the picture he’s holding. It's one of the first ones where he actually felt comfortable enough to look into the camera and smile, his arm wrapped around yours and a peace sign being held up to the side of your face. Your gaze landing on him once again, you tell yourself not to overthink the small grin spread on his face, the red tint that’s just barely making itself visible to you. If you weren’t in such close proximity to him, truthfully, you wouldn’t have even noticed.

“Can I keep this one?” Junpei barely whispers to you. He looks down at you for approval, eyes widening at how close your face has gotten to his. He looks down, noticing it was him who has pressed himself to you, and quickly looks back up into your eyes – face growing redder the more you two look into each other's eyes. You imagine the two of you share the same expression, a mix of being flustered and afraid. His arm wrapped around you stays frozen, afriad that moving would bring you closer or bring your bodies farther from one another. Junpei was unsure which one made him the most uneasy between the two.

Neither of you are sure who brought their face closer to the other, his nose touching yours being the only indication that the two of you were even moving. The quiet room wasn’t silent enough, the beating in your chest too loud for your comfort, convinced that Junpei could hear the way he was making your heart jump. Attempting to break the ice, you open your mouth, closing it just as quickly when you see Junpei scanning your face, his eyes landing on your lips. He tenses up, watching the way it closes and seeing your lips subtly pout.

Seeing Junpei watch you with so much want, feeling his chest rise and fall unevenly on your back, this whole situation became overwhelming for you. Here you stand, a few moments ago trying to rid yourself of the jealousy that was clouding your mind, to now find yourself trapped against him. As close as you two are, it still doesn’t feel close enough. You slightly look away, overwhelmed. Noticing in the corner of your eye the gold sparkly bag making itself noticeable to you on the tabl besides the one with all the pictures.

Whether you were even looking for an escape from the situation or not, you took it, quickly removing yourself from Junpei’s hold. Your cheeks heat up as you shuffle yourself away from him, quickly turning and grabbing the gift back. A deep breath escapes your lips as you turn to him, ignoring the look of rejection spread across his face. You chuckle awkwardly, lifting your arms straight and pushing the bag into his chest.

“I got you something.” You announce too quickly, the sentence almost sounding like one word mushed together. Junpei blinks as he stares at the bag, hesitantly grabbing it and removing it from your hold. Whatever confusing feeling he had left for the time being as he opens it, pulling out the movie Killer Klowns From Outter Space disk.

“I thought you hated this movie.”

“I do. That’s why I’m giving it to you. You can keep it, you said it was hard to find a copy. My mom was gonna toss it anyway.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah. It was my dads. I would rather give it to someone who matters to me just as much than just throw it out.”

Junpei smiles, a soft “Thank you” leaving his lips while he pulls you in for a hug. You can’t move for a moment – nor speak. Just leaving one awkward situation where your bodies were almost too close for comfort right into another one. You slowly wrap both your arms around him, feeling his grip on you tighten.

While it no longer feels awkward, to deny you felt anything other than your stomach doing flips and feeling so at ease in his grip all at once would be a lie.

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[rispwr]

still with you - JK - SPECIAL - FINAL

pairings : ex!jk x ex!reader, barista/producer!yoongi x reader

genre : fluff, angst

context : after everything that happened, yoongi can't keep this a secret to himself. you deserved to know, little did you know he has a special suprise for you.

word count:1k+ words

warnings/contents : dirty talking, slutty lingerie, yoongi LOVES YOUR BOOBS, oral (m recieving), big c yoongi, praising, yeahh

songs : right side of my neck, the part and after the party, die for you, pied piper.

Yoongi's POV

It's been four years since I managed to get Jungkook and his wife thrown in jail. 

Four years of keeping this secret from Y/N.

 Every time I look at her, the weight of what I'm hiding grows heavier. I know she deserves to know—she has the right to know that justice was served, that those who hurt her paid the price.

 But how do you bring up something like that? How do you tell the person you love that you went behind their back to make sure the people who hurt them were punished?

I've been waiting for the right time, but maybe there's never a perfect moment for something like this.

 The thought of telling her, seeing the shock and pain on her face, has kept me silent for too long. But now... now I feel like I can't wait any longer.

As I sit on the couch, trying to distract myself with mindless TV, an idea suddenly comes to me. A way to tell her that doesn't feel like dropping a bomb on our lives. It's not perfect, but it's better than this gnawing silence.

"Heyyy, babyy! I missed youuu, hm," Y/N's voice rings out as she bursts through the door. She doesn't even pause before she's in my arms, wrapping herself around me like a warm blanket. I hug her back tightly, lifting her chin so I can see her face. There's something about the way her eyes light up when she sees me that makes everything else fade away. I lean down, brushing my lips against hers in a gentle kiss. "I missed you more," I whisper against her lips.

We pull back slightly, just enough to look at each other, but I don't let go. My hand stays on her waist, grounding us both in the moment. She looks up at me with that curious glint in her eyes—the one that always makes me think she's up to something.

"Hey, babe," she starts, her voice soft but teasing. "My friend Joonie told me that Jungkook and his wife went to jail four years ago?" She pauses, watching my reaction closely. There's a slight smile on her lips, as if she finds the whole thing bizarre.

Relief floods through me, but I keep my expression neutral, not wanting to give anything away. "Mhm?" I hum, encouraging her to continue.

She tilts her head, that small smile still playing on her lips. "Crazy, right? I didn't even know that. Do you know why he got into jail?"

I force myself to shrug casually, keeping my tone light. "I've heard some things, but I don't know the full story," I lie, letting her take the lead in the conversation. My heart pounds in my chest, but I keep my face relaxed, waiting to see where she takes this.

She nods, her expression thoughtful. "I guess it's for the best, though," she says quietly. "After everything... it feels like some sort of closure, you know?"

I nod along, my throat tightening at her words. I want so badly to tell her the truth, to show her that I was the one who made sure justice was served. But I bite my tongue, knowing it's not the right moment yet. Not here, not now.

As the conversation shifts to other topics, I can't help but feel the tension ease a little. We talk about our plans for the evening, and before I know it, Y/N is inviting me to watch horror movies with her later that night. I agree, relieved that she doesn't seem to suspect anything.

Weeks pass, and Halloween is just around the corner. Y/N's been talking about it for days, excited to spend the holiday with her family. She loves Halloween—everything from the spooky decorations to the scary movies, it's like she's a kid again. I decide to surprise her, booking us a Halloween vacation with her family.

The night before we leave, I take her to get her nails done, making sure everything is perfect. I want this trip to be special, not just because it's Halloween, but because I know what's coming. I've been planning this for weeks, and now it's finally time.

We arrive at the vacation spot—a cozy cabin decorated for Halloween—and Y/N is absolutely in love with it. The place is decked out with all the classic decorations: carved pumpkins, cobwebs, and a few strategically placed skeletons. It's perfect.

As we settle into our room, I turn to her, my heart pounding in my chest. "Hey, I have a present for you," I say, trying to keep my voice steady. She looks up at me, surprised but intrigued.

"A present? What's the occasion?" she asks with a grin.

"You'll see," I say, my tone teasing. But then I take a deep breath, my expression growing serious. "But before I give it to you, you have to promise me one thing."

She looks at me curiously, her head tilting to the side. "What's that?"

"You have to promise me you won't be mad," I say, my voice soft but firm.

Her brows furrow in confusion, but she nods slowly. "Okay... I promise."

I walk over to my bag, pulling out a folder that I've kept hidden for four years. My hands tremble slightly as I hand it to her, my heart in my throat. "This is for you. Everything you need to know. Just... take your time with it."

She takes the folder from me, her expression shifting from curiosity to something more serious. She opens it slowly, her eyes scanning the contents. As she reads, I see the color drain from her face, her eyes widening in shock and disbelief.

"Yoongi... what is this?" she whispers, her voice shaking.

"It's everything," I say quietly. "Everything that happened. the reports and the justice that was served. I... I made sure they paid for what they did to you. I couldn't let them get away with it."

Tears well up in her eyes as she continues to read, her hands trembling. "You... you did this? For me?"

I nod, my heart breaking as I see the pain and disbelief on her face. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner. I just... I wanted to protect you. I wanted to make sure you were okay before I brought all this up."

She looks up at me, tears streaming down her face. "Yoongi... I... I can't believe you did this. I thought..."

I move closer, wrapping my arms around her as she breaks down in my arms. "You don't have to live with it anymore," I whisper into her hair. "You're free now, Y/N. You're safe."

We stay like that for a long time, holding each other as she cries. I can feel the weight of the past four years finally lifting off her shoulders, and it's the most beautiful thing I've ever seen.

Later that evening

after she's had time to process everything, I ask her to come downstairs with me. She's still a bit shaky, her emotions raw, but she nods and follows me.

When we get downstairs, she gasps in surprise. The room is decorated in a soft, romantic purple theme—her favorite color. There are fairy lights strung up everywhere, casting a warm, magical glow over the room. In the center, there's a small table with candles and flowers, and in the background, our favorite song is playing softly.

"Yoongi... what is this?" she asks, her voice filled with awe.

I take a deep breath, my heart pounding in my chest. "This... this is the second part of your gift," I say, reaching into my pocket and pulling out a small velvet box. I drop down on one knee, holding the box out to her. "Y/N, these past few years with you have been the happiest of my life. You've brought me more joy than I ever thought possible, and I want to spend the rest of my life making you as happy as you've made me."

I open the box, revealing the ring inside..an elegant design that I know she'll love. "Will you marry me, Y/N?"

Her hands fly to her mouth, her eyes wide with shock and happiness. Tears well up in her eyes again, but this time they're tears of joy. She nods, a sob escaping her lips as she whispers, "Yes... yes, Yoongi, I'll marry you."

I slip the ring onto her finger, and she pulls me up into a tight hug, burying her face in my chest as she cries happy tears. I hold her close, feeling like the luckiest man in the world.

As we stand there, wrapped in each other's arms, I know that this is just the beginning of our forever. 

later

we then get to our room as i slowly put her on the bed. "baby i love you so much" she said wrapping her arms around my neck, showering me with kisses. "you've been a good boy" she then says as her hands makes its way from my neck to my lips, her thumb caressing my bottom lip, sending shivers down my spine. 

"mhm?" i hummed "i think for everything you've done for me all these years...you need a reward" she gives me a seductive smile. "i think i do" i replied to her. 

my lips then brushed against hers. our kiss becoming more and more intimate, her hands makes its way to unbutton my pants. "impatient much?" i chuckled "mhm so what if i am?" she says. i then pull up her grey silky dress up, revealing her purple lacy panties. 

soaking wet. 

"may i?" i asked her, making sure i have her consent. "ofcourse you can yoongi" she nods 

i then rubbed her clothed, soaking folds. "so wet?" i look at her making eye contact as the more i rubbed the more she releases her arousal. "please yoongi" i then finally take off her dress revealing her bra. 

her lacy purple bra with a tied bow that i needed to untie in order to take it off. "like it? it's your reward baby" she says, smirking at me, her fingers drawing patterns on my arm. "costume made?" i ask as she hummed. 

"best present ever" i murmurred as i gently untie her bra, taking my time to be gentle as much as i can. 

the bra fell revealing her bare breast. i then starts circling my tounge all over her nipple as she lets out whiny noises. 

she then stops me and orders me to sit down, my back resting on the headboard. 

"okay princess. whatever you want" i follow her order and do what she told me to do.

she then lays on her stomach, unzipping my zipper and pulls down my pants along with my underwear. 

she took her hands and teasingly started stroking it "mhm?" she says as she fastens her pace. i rocked my head back from her touch "fuck y/n" i grunt as she then starts putting it in her mouth.

normally with anyone of even my hand it would always take me so long for me to come but with y/n fuck. just her and that slutty lingere can already make me come. 

i felt my orgasm starts getting close "fuck y-y/n...i-i-i'm c-close" i stuttered from all the pleasure i've felt. "can i come??" i asked her, panting. sweat dripping over me. 

as soon as i saw her nod i then finally release my come. she took her mouth away taking my cock to her face as i release my cum on her face. 

she then gives the tip of my cock a kiss before going to me. 

i cupped her face "fuck. you're so beautifull" i praised her, taking my white release from her face to her breast. 

we then switched places. she was now under me.

"can i?" i asked again as my tip brushes her entrance. "mhm" she nods. i then put my cock in, giving her time to stretch herself and adjust to my size. "tell me when i can move" i tell her. "you can m-move now" she replies. i then start to thrust into her, my hands cupping her boobs. 

"f-fuck.. you drive me so crazy y/n" i grunt as i fasten my pace. i then took my hand from her boob to her clit, circling it making her body arch from the pleasure. "a-ahh yoongi!" she screams "like it??" i asks her "m-mhm" she moans. "words baby. words" i said lifting her chin "yes! yes.. please" she replies to me, her eyes rolling back from the pleasure. 

"i'm cumming" she says "me too" i reply. "c-cum in me yoongi. please" she begs me. 

i then finally felt my orgasm again as i finally release into her, covering up her walls into white as our cum mixes together.

i then pull out and gets a wet wipe from the bedside to wipe the mess i made with her, giving her aftercare. "you tired?" i ask her as she gasps for air. "no. care for a round 2?" she fires back making me chuckle "such a dirty girl"

few weeks later Yoongi's POV

The room was filled with soft laughter and the faint sound of wedding planning. Y/N and I were sitting at the kitchen table, surrounded by swatches of fabric, invitations, and a laptop open to various wedding venues. It was one of those rare, quiet moments where everything felt perfect.

"Yoongi, what do you think of this color scheme?" Y/N asked, holding up a piece of paper with a mix of lavender and deep purple shades.

I leaned over, taking a closer look. "It's beautiful. It'll look amazing with the decorations we talked about."

Y/N smiled, clearly pleased. "I think so too. And what about the invitations? Do you like this design?"

She showed me a mock-up of our wedding invitation, with elegant script and floral accents. I nodded, feeling a rush of excitement. "It's perfect. I think it's exactly what we want."

As we continued discussing details, an idea struck me. I reached for the stack of invitations and picked one up.

I took out one of the invitations and carefully addressed it to Jungkook. After sealing it in an envelope, I set it aside to be mailed

[biowhore]

Credentials

dom!Gale x bratty female sorcerer Tav

Context: Gale and Tav have an argument about magical theory, and things get real tasty.

Content: Smut, lemon, porn without the plot, oral (both), orgasm denial, prostate stimulation, restraint, PIV, inappropriate use of mage hand

“Am I truly so beneath you?” he purred.  “Well, you could certainly be beneath me right now,” she purred back. She wasn’t subdued just yet.  Gods this vixen. He was pulled back to her by the temptation of her resistance, taking her mouth with his again. He groaned into her mouth, “You wicked, wicked pixie.” He licked into her mouth and bit at her lips, his hand angling her head for him.  She managed to break free of the kiss, “Come on, Gale, finish what you started,” she compelled him.  He answered her with confidence, “I do not quite believe that I started this, but I will finish it.” He stepped back again and surveyed his capture with keen eyes. 

*the POV switches between Gale and Tav randomly so it might be a little confusing. I'm playing around with third person and perspectives

Fic List AO3

There was quiet, only the sounds of their gusting breaths, eyes unwavering from each other, neither willing to make the first move. So they didn’t. They did it together.  

Gale and Tav rushed at each other, colliding with startling force and hands and teeth. Gale gripped the back of Tav’s head and took the first kiss, all clashing lips, panting breaths, and dueling tongues. He commanded her with his mouth, bowing over her slightly, and the lightning that shot through her in response was startling. But she loved it. They’ve had their squabbles to be sure, but she’d never riled him quite this much. He was entirely dominant in the moment, and she realized that he was pushing her backward. Her back hit the wall a moment later and a feral grin snuck across her face in between his raging kisses. She must prolong this; it was just too good.  

“You’re still wrong,” she insisted on panting breaths. 

“It is my specialization. You are quite literally ignoring the fundamentals of the concept.” He scoffed, pulling back from the kiss while his hand further tightened at the back of her head. “Why will you not concede that my knowledge and experience surpass you in this?” 

“Guess you’ll have to make me.” 

His eyes widened in pure bewilderment, then that fire she’d stoked came roaring back. With frustration ladening his voice he growled, “You are so- so crass, stubborn, arrogant-” 

“And better than you.” 

He pushed Tav against the wall even harder, and muttered something she couldn’t catch during the distraction. Now, now, she tried to say, but no sound emerged from her mouth. The bastard silenced her! 

He smirked as the realization crossed her face, “That’s quite enough of your depraved mouth.” 

She returned the grin; He’d remember after this that she didn’t need her mouth. Her hand reached between them and gripped the front of his trousers, feeling the obvious enjoyment he was getting out of this exchange, despite the tone of his words. Her hand squeezed, then stroked his hardness through the fabric. Gale’s eyes flickered and that grin faded, and he lunged forward to take back her mouth in those furious kisses. Perfect, she thought, Gods, he’s so perfect like this.  

Gale distantly thought that he was less in control of this interaction than their positions would suggest, but the taste of her flooded his mind and drowned out all thought save for his anger and lust. Her hand stroked him through his trousers and his hips moved unbidden against her palm, seeking more sensation. He must be the victor, he was right, and those smug smiles on her face, UGH. It only sent him into a frenzy when he knew he was absolutely in the right here. Her hand squeezed slightly at his head and a shudder rolled over his back. No, she can’t win, he thought. Stepping back after biting her lower lip, he quickly uttered an incantation that had spectral hands gripping her wrists and ankles. Her hands were raised and pinned to the wall above her head, her ankles gently tugged so her stance widened for him.  

Taking a moment to savor this view of her, he flicked his wrist to remove the Silence spell and asked, “Comfortable?” 

Tav’s breathing had kicked up, and she was panting unabashedly from the powerful arousal of being restrained by him. They’d never done anything like this together, and she was quickly finding that she really, really, liked it. What else would he do? 

She pointedly looked at her hands and feet, “We’re a bit past cordiality, no?” 

“I’m not trying to hurt you,” He huffed. 

“Maybe I want you to.” 

He chuckled under his breath and rolled his eyes, giving a subtle shake of his head as he crossed his arms, “Back to the point: just admit that you’re outclassed.”  

“I’m never outclassed, wizard,” Tav smirked. Oh, he was really going to hate this next part. “You’re just jealous that I can feel it in my bones, and you’ve had to study yourself into the ground to get even that far.” 

It wasn’t anything Gale had not heard before, so her goading rolled right off his shoulders. But he was beginning to understand this game and how to play along. He lunged for her again, one hand cradling the back of her head and the other diving under her robe and between her thighs, rubbing firmly in circles at first then backing off to feather light brushes of his fingertips against the fabric of her underwear. He felt her tense and then she attempted to chase his fingers with her hips, wanting that firm pressure back. She bit her bottom lip, a teasing visual for him as her teeth sunk into that pillowy softness. He replaced her teeth with his, sucking on her lip and then trailing down her neck with biting kisses. He smiled triumphantly as he heard her first moan in his ears, keeping his mouth on her skin and sliding his fingers underneath her underwear to coast across the hood of her clit, never giving pressure, only the ghost of it.  

Her hips bucked against him, and he tutted, “Behave, or I’ll restrain you further.”  

She let out a gasping second moan, as if that was exactly what she wanted. Oh yes, he understood perfectly how to play this game now. He removed his hand and deftly unclasped the front of her robe, opening it wide, and unlacing the sheer slip clinging to her curves beneath. He pinned her hips against the wall to still her, then resumed those biting kisses over her shoulders, her collarbone, between her breasts and finally to her breasts themselves. The tip of his tongue circled around each nipple, and he sucked mercilessly on each one, long pulls that gave a popping sound as he pulled back. She yelped loudly but he continued his path south, licking down her ribs. His tongue found her navel and dipped inside, causing her to squirm and writhe the hardest yet, and he gave a dark chuckle. He lowered to his knees, stared up at her with an impish smile, and bunched her slip around her hips. He slowly lowered his mouth to her sex, tonguing her clit through the fabric of her underwear, feeling her muscles tense as she stifled a whine in her throat. Backing off again, he deftly ripped the waistband of the fabric and tore it away from where he wanted his mouth, finally giving her the pressure and friction that she ached for. His wrist flicked and the hands gripping her ankles widened her stance even more, allowing him to delve his tongue into her plush channel.  He sucked at her velvety folds, lapped at her clit teasingly, and dipped his tongue back into her. A realization that he loved to tease her tickled the back of his mind, but the forefront was consumed by the way she tasted and how she was crying out freely. Her hips were pitched forward, and her cries became higher and higher, and then he stepped away suddenly.  

“Not yet,” He commanded. A soft glow emanated from his fingertips as he spoke a low incantation, pressing those fingers to her sex. They were icy cold and would halt her climax and numb her slightly. “Not until I say.” 

A long, low groan burst from Tav’s throat as he stole her impending orgasm from her, ending in a half-heartedly wrathful growl, “You bastard,” she gusted with each breath, “You bastard... bastard...” 

The back of her head hit the wall as her strength failed her, now completely at his mercy, or lack thereof. Her legs shook and her head swam with the shock of being so close to tipping over the edge, only to be rudely yanked back. She watched his face under her lashes as he stood and admired the mess of her he’d made, his chin tucked between his thumb and forefinger.  

“Am I truly so beneath you?” he purred. 

“Well, you could certainly be beneath me right now,” she purred back. She wasn’t subdued just yet. 

Gods this vixen. He was pulled back to her by the temptation of her resistance, taking her mouth with his again. He groaned into her mouth, “You wicked, wicked pixie.” He licked into her mouth and bit at her lips, his hand angling her head for him. 

She managed to break free of the kiss, “Come on, Gale, finish what you started,” she compelled him. 

He answered her with confidence, “I do not quite believe that I started this, but I will finish it.” He stepped back again and surveyed his capture with keen eyes. 

“That mouth of yours really is quite vexatious,” triumph in his face as he began shifting the spectral hands to change her position. Her knees bent and she lowered to kneel before him, the hands at her wrists pulling back so that her chest was slightly thrust forward. “Perhaps I’ll give it something to worry over,” he uttered lowly while unlacing his trousers.  

Her cheeks ignited with a great anticipatory flush, her mouth flooding with saliva at the sight of him above her and the feeling of her hands behind her back. She watched avidly as his fingers deftly unlaced the front of his trousers, pulling them and his underwear down to his thighs, releasing himself. Dutifully, she opened her mouth for him, waiting patiently. He took her chin in his fingers and set the tip of his cock on her tongue, “Good girl,” he grinned, then slid himself into her mouth. She moaned around him, watching his face as he slid in and out of her mouth, pressing her tongue to the underside of him and flicking gently. A crease between his brows formed slowly as his pleasure increased, but he still moved slowly. She sucked him as he pulled away and flicked with her tongue as he moved forward, and frustratingly wished she could use her hands to encourage his hips. She wanted him to lose his control and use her mouth as mercilessly as he denied her orgasm earlier.  

An idea sparked in her mind. He wasn’t the only one who could be merciless, and again, she didn’t need to use her hands, or her mouth. She continued to watch his face, watch that crease in his brow. Her lashes fluttered closed as she concentrated on her magic, grinning inwardly to herself. She felt the well of her power answer to her will, as easily as breathing. Right now, Gale should be feeling a new warm pressure sensation around his prostate. She’d done this for him before, but certainly not with magic. She felt his hips stutter, and she opened her eyes to see that crease in his eyebrows deepened, and his eyes honed to hers with a knowing spark. 

“Oh, you...” he started and trailed off, the pleasure taking his words. 

His hands flew to her hair and the back of her head, moving earnestly in her mouth now. She opened her throat for him, taking breaths on his retreat, squeezing and sucking around him as he thrust into her throat. Small tears were forced into the corners of her eyes, but she loved every second of it. Seeing him lose composure and chase his pleasure, using her however he wished. She focused on her magic, continuing to stimulate him with her mouth and her mind. His breath gusted out of him above her, and suddenly her hands and feet were free. He’d apparently lost concentration, and she took the opportunity to grip his thighs and pull his hips forward, sucking his cock deep into her throat. He groaned, and she dug her fingernails into his flesh, relishing the feel of him. She moaned around him again and moved a hand to his sac, massaging there as well as inside him. She heard a growl above her and the next she knew, she was gulping air as she was pulled off him by her hair, her back thudding against the floor and his mouth stealing her air again. Her hands grappled for purchase in his shirt, and his hands lifted her hips as he slid home inside her and began slamming into her. She cried out with pleasure and victory, a feral smile on her face as she nipped at his lips and moved her hips to meet his. Their cries were loud and uncaring, and she watched his face as he lost himself, sweat beading on his brow, his chest heaving as he rutted into her. He leaned his forehead against hers and groaned against her lips, “Come. Now.” 

The command in his voice was all it took for her, and her climax barreled up her spine, wrenching a scream from her throat. He slammed fully against her and paused, shuddering bodily, a groan to match her scream emanating from his chest, his muscles taut under his skin as his own orgasm stunned him with its force. Their strength fled them all at once, both collapsing. Gale barely had the presence of mind to shift some of his weight onto his elbow to avoid crushing her completely, still resting his forehead against hers.  

After a few moments of only the sounds of them catching their breaths, he rolled them to their sides. They gazed at each other with sated, slightly surprised smiles across their cheeks. Tav traced their finger across Gale’s brows, and Gale squeezed her hip gently.  

“What were we arguing about?” Tav asked, a little slur in her words. 

Gale chuckled, “I haven’t the faintest idea.” 

---

Thank you for reading! I hope you enjoyed it.

I found clips of angry Gale and was... inspired.

This was supposed to be a fun little drabble to take a break from the other stuff I'm writing but I had a little too much fun with it.

[magnorious]

The Reveal that Changed Percy Jackson

*Spoiler Alert*

I’m talking about the Nico vs Cupid scene in book 8, House of Hades. I picked this scene, even though there were a great many in the original series that defined Percy Jackson as a story far more meaningful than just “cool tweenage demigods with magic and superpowers who fight evil”.

When this book came out, Nico vs Cupid was almost all anyone talked about. Why? Because Nico came out. Nico, an explicitly gay character in a book published by Disney, in a rather high profile series. Nico, the little angsty brat displaced from the timeline, comes out of nowhere with a world-shattering reveal.

House of Hades is already the darkest book in the series and, I think, the most polished and successful with this tone and how it feels so complete. While Percy and Annabeth are in Tartarus, the constant clever and horrific callbacks to quests from prior books quite literally come back to haunt them. The others trying to carry on without them, the ridiculously high personal stakes, the drama, the storytelling, it spares no expense in this book.

The Nico vs Cupid scene was something else, though, and all these years later… I’m not so sure it was done for the better.

—

Independent of the Big Reveal, this scene does a lot of things we’d never seen before in this series, namely this: Cupid is scary, and no one expected him to be.

Percy Jackson, though it does have its serious moments, is the series where the god of wine wears leopard print shirts and the god of the seas has a fishing chair for a throne. These characters quip and joke even when they’re trying to be intimidating and Percy’s personality, snarky and sassy and very rarely shooting straight, undercuts a lot of the attempts at looking competent and threatening (and we love him for it).

They’ve fought gods and monsters and demigods and characters have died really tragic deaths, but for the most part, these serious moments all come when we expect them to.

This scene comes out of nowhere and for anyone who hasn’t read the book in a while, here’s the context: Percy and Annabeth are in Tartarus and Nico is kind of the de-facto leader in their absence, knowing the most about Tartarus of the remaining crew. He and Jason are sent on a side quest to go retrieve the Staff of Diocletian from Cupid and Nico is not at all happy about this venture, but we don’t know why beyond that he’s Nico and he’s never happy.

Right out of the gate, Cupid is not at all who we expect him to be and this fight scene, absent of Percy, is suddenly very serious. Cupid doesn’t quip, he doesn’t show himself, and he fights dirty. The god of love, not the god of war or anything we expect to be violent and dangerous.

He’s whispering in characters’ heads, throwing them around like ragdolls, and taunting Nico ceaselessly all in Jason’s POV. Cupid gets some seriously badass lines, too.

“I’ve been to Tartarus and back,” Nico snarled. “You don’t scare me.” I scare you very, very much. Face me. Be honest.

Love is no game! It is no flowery softness! It is hard work—a quest that never ends. It demands everything from you—especially the truth. Only then does it yield rewards.

“Oh, I wouldn’t say Love always makes you happy.” [Cupid's] voice sounded smaller, much more human. “Sometimes it makes you incredibly sad. But at least you’ve faced it now. That’s the only way to conquer me.”

In all this, unfortunately in Jason POV, we’re primed only once by a previous god finally acknowledging that gays exist in this universe. This universe, based on Greek Mythology, famous for its not-straightness. Even then, audiences have spent 7 and a half books accepting that there won’t be any gays. No one is expecting this from Nico.

So when it comes, when Nico reveals he has a crush on Percy… the fandom lost our minds.

—

And I’m not so sure that’s a good thing, looking back. On the one hand, obligatory “we need representation,” but on the other, there was this one reviewer who knew what was up long before anyone else did.

She’d said something along the lines of raising damning concerns that Nico’s entire character arc was now defined by his homosexuality, that this scene frames all his anger, all his hate, all his rage and depression, about this one aspect of his character, and diminishes him because of it.

All these years later, I’m disappointed to say I agree with her.

This book series’ only major canonical gay (so far) is forced out of the closet with a proverbial gun to his head

Now, Nico likely never would have come out without that gun, but the way it happened, especially in front of Jason who he’s not friends with, showing Jason his memories because it’s not Nico’s POV and Jason has to see somehow because Nico sure won’t detail those scenes himself is... not good?

Jason handles it well, as well as he can given that this is Nico, and Cupid is an explicit villain so him forcing Nico out is in-character and not my problem. The narrative forcing Nico out is the problem—that this is a big reveal both to Jason and the audience is the problem.

The book isn’t new and with respect to when it was written and who wrote it, it’s not a terrible scene or terrible representation. But it’s not just forcing Nico out of the closet, either.

All of Nico’s character development is retroactively pinned on his sexuality

I get it. Nico’s… 14? 14 and from an era where being who he is was a death sentence, with zero education on the matter. Internalized homophobia is a thing (though Nico doesn’t actually seem to hate himself for being gay, he hates himself for crushing on Percy. Nor does he hate other gays or the concept).

Nico, though, is the one demigod who can summon any ghost he could dream up to teach him to hate himself a little less. He could have summoned the ghost of Freddie Mercury and what a dazzling mentorship that would have been.

The way the scene is framed makes it look like all of Nico’s rage comes from this one relationship, when it comes from so much more. He’s a son of Hades, a god no one trusts or likes and is synonymous with death, evil, and deceit. His sister, his last living relative, died on a quest as just a teenager. He has no friends at camp, powers that scare people, and is almost a century removed from everything and everyone he knew in his old life.

And he went and left camp *only* because of his crush on Percy? Not for any other reason?

When he does get his crush on Will, that only makes it worse. Nico did have friends, even if he didn’t believe it. He did have Percy and he’d earned the respect of his fellow campers after the Battle of Manhattan. He back-slid in HOH for this reveal, as if a romance is the only thing that could make him happy.

Cupid’s message is the narrative’s message: The only way to conquer love is to face it [in combat]

With a gun to his head, in front of a veritable stranger, instead of in, I don’t know, therapy with Apollo? There couldn’t have been any other way to fit this reveal in? He couldn’t have made his own group therapy session with other ghosts? Persephone or Demeter never sat this boy down for The Talk with a literal captive audience?

And that it’s a “reveal” at all, in incredibly dramatic fashion, a plot twist for shock value. The book couldn’t drop hints in Nico POV? Couldn’t casually state it anywhere at any time in the previous 3 books? Couldn’t treat it at all like this is normal and not a life-or-death situation?

I just feel bad for the kid. Nico can’t be the only demigod who has a guilty, unrequited crush. Cupid is forcing this out of him because that crush happens to be on another boy.

It’s in Jason’s POV

This world shattering, deeply personal reveal, and the character who’s having it isn’t even the narrator. Jason is a fine character and I know why it’s him out of everyone who could have gone with Nico, but this should have been solely Nico’s moment, not Jason’s commentary about Nico’s moment, being a non-consenting voyeur into Nico’s very personal memories about Percy.

Even if it’s not Jason’s POV to retain the surprise, it certainly starts to feel like Jason’s POV to retain the surprise. Jason can still be present, but even then—Cupid needed Nico to face Cupid, not Cupid and Jason.

—

It sucks because the scene as a whole, removed from the context, is incredible. The choreography, the pacing, the intensity of the battle, Cupid as a villain and Nico and Jason’s desperation to just stay alive.

Its impact on the series can’t be ignored. Blood of Olympus is no one’s favorite. It’s a terrible last book and not all that great as a book, period, but the ending?

Among other travesties, Nico confronts Percy, tells him he had a crush on him, and then *immediately* starts pining after Will. Percy doesn’t get the chance to talk to him, stunned at this reveal. They never have a heartfelt conversation about it, what this means for their friendship, how Percy never noticed or how this makes him feel, if he’s at all guilty for potentially leading Nico on and being a bad friend.

We get none of that. Nico just finds a pretty blond boy after, what, four years pining after Percy? One awful confrontation with Cupid and a few lines of dialogue traded with Jason and all his angst and moodiness is cured off-screen.

Can’t Nico go five minutes where he figures out who he is before he’s trading one crush for another? Can he not define himself independently of who he likes for just a couple chapters? He tells Jason after the Cupid fight that he’s over it, but… c’mon, he’s absolutely lying there, or he wouldn’t have been so hurt and upset and hesitant to reveal himself.

I love that he’s popular now, I love that he does have a healthy relationship (one that eclipsed the whole fandom for better or for worse), but the way he went about becoming popular still leaves a bad taste in my mouth. Nico did walk so the rest of the series' extended universe could run. We did get Solangelo, we got Apollo being Apollo, we got a world based off Greek Mythology that stops straight-washing history. It's just a shame that he had to be forced out the way he did, and that his whole character is now defined by his relationship with Will.

[dr-futbol-blog]

Childhood's End

There sure are a lot of strapping young lads in this episode.

In Childhood's End (S01E06), we start sowing the seeds of jealousy that we find upon multiple instances both Sheppard and McKay express when it comes to the other's interest in a woman or a woman's interest in them (possibly this already started at the end of the previous episode with the handsy nurse; there Rodney was miffed, here Sheppard is miffed). Jealousy due to romantic rivalry between two men would make sense in a heteronormative context (women are paying more attention to my friend when they should be paying attention to me) but, uh. That is not and never will be the case with these two.

McKay mentions Samantha Carter at the outset and while he doesn't see the faces Sheppard pulls, we sure do. The thing is, McKay doesn't even say anything particularly incriminating. It's the mere tone of his voice when he mentions her name that Sheppard seems to pick up on.

Devil's advocate: Sheppard finds it distasteful that a fellow officer is being objectified. He finds 'locker room talk' crass, even though there's barely a hint of it here. Okay. But then he does this:

This lip thing is something that we see Sheppard do when ever he does not know how to deal with difficult emotions (a notable example is following the hug Elizabeth gives him after he survives a suicide mission in The Siege, Pt III). This is self-soothing behaviour.

The episode also starts with an example of something that I really don't like but which clearly stems from McKay's insecurity: indicating that he is of a superior intellect and that Sheppard is dumb ("I'm sorry: Yes, energy field good"). Yes, he also did that to Sam in the very beginning ("I have a weakness for dumb blondes"; let's preemptively insult the attractive person to take the sting off the inevitable rejection). He did actually already start this with Sheppard at the outset ("I knew that, of course. I'm just surprised that you did").

This is also one of the reasons I think 38 Minutes (S01E04) would have worked much better later on in the season: in it, we have another instance of McKay asserting his intellectual superiority over the others ("I apologise for being the only person who truly comprehends how screwed we are!") because he "reacts to certain doom a certain way" and Sheppard, being in the bind that he is, cuts him short real quick: "You've got to stop using your mouth and start using your brain!"

This is something that we return to time and again. McKay panics and starts going off on everyone around him focusing on all the wrong things, and Sheppard cuts through the fog to get his attention back to solving the problem.

In-universe, McKay is one of the smartest people alive. Some have argued even the smartest. According to Daniel Jackson, he could have won the Nobel Prize several times over. Yes. We later learn that Sheppard is of above-average intellect but obviously he is no match for Marty-Stu McKay because no one is.

Only, when it comes to strategy and strategic thinking, Sheppard is light years ahead of McKay.

This is a very good example of that: Sheppard is teaching McKay how to communicate on a mission. Be succinct, to the point, give only the information that is relevant. Clear communication and simplification of data is vital operation protocol, especially in scenarios of certain doom. Everyone knows that you're smarter than them my guy, he's just trying to keep you and everyone else unharmed.

This episode also marks the hilarious beginning of Sheppard's poor sense of direction. In fact, neither of them can keep a straight line with regards to orientation.

Sheppard can orient himself in the sky but not on land. McKay, as we later learn, cannot keep to a straight line on the ground or in the air.

In the episode, Keras and Sheppard bond real quick. The young village elder seems smitten. Good god, he looks Sheppard intensely in the eyes and says: "I’ll be honest with you, Sheppard. There’s nothing I’d like more than to spend more time talking with you… But it’s not possible." You know, like straight dudes do.

Sheppard also seems to like the boy just fine, although how much of his behaviour is designed simply to stop Keras from doing something he thinks is morally bankrupt is up in the air. They are sitting together, walking together, exchanging personal information.

There's also this:

Keras: Would you stand witness? Sheppard: Me? Well, what do I have to do? Keras: Just be there, as I prepare. We gather the strength from those close to us for the Sacrifice to come.

In the few brief moments they have spent together, they've apparently become close enough for him to ask Sheppard to witness his suicide ceremony. He even takes an arrow to the chest for this man he has just met.

What's real interesting, though, and which I'll return to in connection with Teyla's baby later is when Keras asks Sheppard whether he has any children. He responds: "Me? No. Not yet, anyway." Not yet. Not yet but he might want some one day.

The thing is, McKay's entire arc in this episode deals with him and how he is with children. He starts by being extremely annoyed by them like he's a big child himself. Ford tells the kids: "He's just upset because you're smarter than him." But by the end of the episode he has come to care for these children. He keeps them safe and protected, and makes sure that they haven't been hurt or traumatized by the ordeal. The persistence of these children changed him, and now he seems like he might make a great parent some day. And while they are antagonized by him, the kids also seem to really like him.

Now, what possible, possible reason could you have to bring up one character's desire for children in the future and showing what an excellent parent another character would make in the same episode? Hmm?

[outism-odyssey]

Outis Base EGO Sin Analysis

Right, I made this blog specifically to analyze her sins... and promptly forgot to do that!

For the meanings of each sin, I’ll be largely referring to this post from @lu-is-not-ok​ (its a very good post, do check it out!)

I originally meant to do her base ID and EGO in the same post, but, the EGO alone goes on for a while. (I’ll probably write up the base ID tomorrow)

Sin Costs

To Páthos Máthos costs 2 pride and 2 sloth, and translates to "Suffering Becomes Experience". Pride generally represents ignoring consequences. Act now, deal with the problems later. And almost always, pride-related actions ate taken out of the belief the benefits will outweigh the consequences. Sloth, on the other hand, represents apathy and resignation. It has many uses, but a particular use I think resonates with this ego is to do things without ever complaining or acting out.

Together, these sins would suggest that Outis believes what doesn't kill you makes you stronger. That she should press on, stoic and ignoring the pain, believing in the end she'll come out better for it. But, I don't think she actually believes that. Rather, it's what she *wants* to believe.

Early in canto 4, Outis tells the other sinners that "experiencing a certain pain will make you learn to fear and avoid it." And she says this in a very different tone of voice to the rest of her speech. It certainly doesn't sound like the words or tone of someone who thinks pain makes them stronger.

Her EGO's line is "the odyssey has a purpose." And in the context of her speech in canto 4? It sounds to me like she's trying to convince herself. She's trying to tell herself that there's meaning to her suffering, and that she hasn't just gone through all this for no reason. Telling herself that her odyssey did have a purpose.

Sin Resistances

There’s a few theories around about what exactly sin resistances on a sinner’s EGO means (like this one from analytical-machine!), but for this analysis I’ll be sticking to my own interpretation of it.

In the abnormality EGOs, I don’t believe resistances mean much of anything.it’s just the abnormality’s resistances, and it’s always identical across all sinners with the same EGO. But, the base EGOs are more interesting.

For a sinner’s base EGO, I believe the sins they’re fatal to are in some way connected to the origins of their traumas, while the sin they endure is how they’re trying to escape it - either literally or metaphorically.

For instance, Gregor has fatal for gloom and envy damage - respectively representing his PTSD and feelings towards G corp, and Hermann using him as a test subject and poster boy. On the other hand, he endures sloth. Gregor escaped the room he was locked into when, out of resignation, he cut the apple and was allowed to leave - resignation being heavily associated with sloth.

The resistances for To Páthos Máthos are: Fatal: lust, envy Endured: gloom

The combination of lust and envy was odd. Lust is associated with self-indulgence, following your own whims and goals. But Envy is associated with taking action because of someone else. They seem like complete opposites. I kind of didn’t know what to do about them. But, @speedynamo​ had some great insight in some comments, and I’ll paraphrase those below.

For Outis’ envy weakness: In The Odyssey, Odysseus ended up in the trojan war because he was bound by a truce to support the Greeks if Helen were ever to be kidnapped. When Paris of Troy asked Aphrodite for the most beautiful woman on earth for marriage, Aphrodite gave him Helen - thus kicking off the war and dragging in Odysseus.

And for the lust: War's often promoted as something that will make you complete. And because of that, many people think the best way to achieve your desires is to go out, fight in war, and come back as a war hero.

Speedynamo mentioned that their analysis hinged on there being a very close equivalent to the Trojan war. And there certainly is: the smoke war! While the specifics probably aren’t identical, there is a good chance that Outis’ experience was similar. Something was stolen (likely Old L Corp’s singularity?), and a deal/truce involving it dragged Outis into the war, where she believed she could complete herself by becoming a war hero.

It probably didn’t work out that way, though. So, how does Outis deal with it? With her resisting gloom... it seems like she doesn’t handle it. Gloom as a sin is all about stewing in your negative emotions, buckling under pressure, letting those emotions control you. And while we never see her express this directly, there are a few rare moments where she seems to show this side of herself - like when she tells Dongrang the calf will remember him, or in her sunshower EGO’s corrosion line (which is a topic for another time)

But, with her mask(s) on constantly, it’s not often that you see this side to her.

[horizonspurple]

Icecold Part 1

You had asked me to get on the bed. I look at you with curiosity in my eyes. You just give me an impatient look back and gesture at the bed. I make my way over to our double bed with the pretty purple sheets you had let me pick. I get on the bed and sit down, then glance over at you. 'Strip. I want you in your underwear', your voice is sweet but stern. Knowing better than to be disobedient, I grab the hem of my shirt and slowly pull it over my head. Your eyes are fixed to me, taking everything in as I slowly but surely expose myself more to you. After my shirt drops to the ground, I reach to unzip my skirt and I shyly move it over my hips and off my legs. You move closer to me so you can run your hand along the lining of my black lace bra, sending a small shiver through me. Then your hands move to my hips, where you play a little with the lacy lining of the matching thong I am wearing. 'God, those curves', you murmur as you give my hip a soft squeeze. I shyly cover my face with my hands and giggle at the compliment. Then your hand disappears and you turn around to grab something.

When you turn back around I can see you holding a set of handcuffs in one hand, a blindfold in the other. I shoot you a curious and nervous look, as you smile at me and walk over to the bed. 'Hold out your hands, angel', a teasy undertone in your voice. 'What are we gonna do sir?', I ask, hoping to get some context on your plans. 'You'll see. Actually, you'll feel', you joke while holding up the blindfold. I look up at you while making a pouty face and you reach out to rub my bottom lip. 'Now hold. Out. Your fucking. Hands.' Within a few seconds the goofy attitude is gone and made place for a strict demeanor. Without wasting a heartbeat I hold up my hands for you to put the cuffs on. 'Now go lay down near the edge of the bed. I want you flat on your back, okay Bun?', even the cute nickname comes out of your mouth in a strict tone. I clumsily move myself further onto the bed, very aware of how the handcuffs restrict my movement. But that is exactly what you want, you like to watch me struggle. When I've made my way into position you walk over to me and gently put the blindfold over my eyes, making sure my hair doesn't make it slide off and also giving a playful tug on it to make me remember who is in charge now.

Once everything is dark, I start to focus on my hearing. I can hear your footsteps fade away as you walk out of the room. 'S-sir?', I softly call after you, not wanting to be left alone. Seconds later I hear your footsteps return, and you start placing stuff down on the bedside table, making sure to be so quiet I can't figure out what you brought. Then I feel your hands on me again. I flinch at the sudden touch as you pull my bra down to expose my boobs. Then I feel a slap against my thigh. 'Lift your hips up', you order and I do as you say. You pull my thong of my body and I hear a faint and soft thud as it hits the ground. Then nothing again, just the black before my eyes. 'Open your mouth for me Bun, and stick your tongue a bit', your voice comes from besides my head. I hesitantly open my mouth and after a few seconds I feel something very cold drip into my mouth. Is it, icewater? Why would you drip cold water in my mouth? A few more drops hit my tongue and I swallow. Then I feel your hand push against my chin, pushing my mouth closed again. My hands suddenly get lifted off of my body and pushed into the matress above my head. 'Now, you're gonna keep your fucking hands right there. If you move then down I wont hesitate to tie them in place, hmm?' your voice growls into my ear, making me shiver a little as I start nodding yes. Then I sense you moving away again, leaving me naked and vulnerable on the bed.

[tobiasdrake]

Digimon Adventure 01x19 - Nanomon of the Labyrinth / The Prisoner of the Pyramid

Previously on Digimon Adventure: The enigmatic Piccolomon sent Taichi on a mystical quest to remember how to ride a bike. He made everyone clean his house in payment.

Now we're back on the trail with only two Crests left to find!

We open on our kids messing around with Etemon's Dark Network. An idea they now have to deliberate while Koushiro is already doing it.

Taichi: This? Koushiro: Yes. This is undoubtedly the network Etemon uses to track our location. Jou: Then he probably knows we're here! Mimi: EHHH!?!? Let's make a run for it! Palmon: Let's run! Let's run! Sora: Now, now. Calm down. Yamato: Even if we run from here, he'll sniff us out again sooner or later.

Valid arguments being made on both sides. :P On the one hand, this is an opportunity. On the other hand WTF GTFO. You can tell from context that the offscreen events leading up to this moment were basically just Koushiro going "Oh, hey, check that out!" and running over to it without telling anyone what he's doing.

Jou and Mimi are instantly not about it the second Koushiro explains what this is, while Sora and Yamato want to see where he's going with this.

In the dub:

Tai: What is it, Izzy? Some kind of power generator? Izzy: Even better. Etemon has hard-wired the entire desert, creating an extensive computer network. My guess: This is one of his remote data-access terminals. Tai: Great! Let's crash it! Sora: It could be a booby trap. Matt: If it is Etemon's, I say we cross the wires and mess it up good!

Something that's been interesting to take note of through the Etemon arc is the way the show anticipates kids coming in and out of it, or not remembering what's going on.

The original expects you to have followed along enough that Koushiro can just say "This is the network he tracks us with" right at the start. Over here, Izzy takes the time to explain what the Dark Network is, in case the kids watching don't remember or haven't seen previous episodes.

This means cutting into Mimi and Jou's lines, which have been cut - And, in turn, cutting those lines is another small influence on the show's tone. It gives the kids a unified front as a heroic team instead of squabbling like frightened survivors. The only voices heard are of support for Izzy messing with their nemesis - with one note of caution from Sora.

Koushiro unplugs a cable from Etemon's device, plugging it into his laptop.

Tentomon: What are you doing? Koushiro: Like I thought. (An array of data representing the cables and their hubs appears on Koushiro's screen.) Koushiro: This is Etemon's network information. I might be able to find something in here! Takeru: What's that mark?

A notification has appeared in the upper left corner of Koushiro's screen, indicating that he's received email. That wasn't there when he first looked at the network, which means it came in seconds ago.

(For a kid who lamented back in the File Island sewers that he misses sending emails with his friends, Koushiro doesn't seem to get a lot of emails. He's been here for over two weeks and this is the first he's had?)

Koushiro: Email? But from who? Jou: Could it be from the enemy!? Taichi: Open it, Koushiro. Koushiro: ...oh, okay!

Koushiro pops open the email, which opens with "HELP ME!" in oversized font.

Sora: "Help Me"!? Koushiro: "If you help me, I can tell you where the Crests are hidden." Yamato: The Crests!? Taichi: Who is this guy!?

Just like that, we have a new angle of investigation to pursue. As a clever bit of subtle foreshadowing, the email is from the address, "NNm@nnia.mstr.com". Nanomon @ NanomonNetworkInternetAccess.Master.com, huh?

In the dub, the appearance of the network isn't acknowledged directly, with Izzy simply talking in roundabout terms about how he's trying to access Etemon's data.

Tentomon: What are you going to do with that? Izzy: I wonder... (An array of data representing the cables and their hubs appears on Koushiro's screen.) Izzy: It's entirely possible that our computers have compatible systems. And if they do, I can tap into Etemon's network. T.K.: Hey, you have mail. Izzy: Oh? That was quick. Who even knows I've logged on? Joe: Oh no, it's Etemon. Tai: Open it! It's probably just spam. Izzy: Right.

It's a little janky that Izzy keeps talking about how he might be able to tap into Etemon's systems while a clear visual representation of Etemon's accessed systems is shown to us. If you know what you're looking at, you can take it as him back-explaining his logic for how he already got to this point. But it could just as easily look like Random Computer Junk.

From here, the dub had to do some finagling. As part of the localization process, they've been trying to write around the fact that things are written in Japanese. They earlier redrew a message from Joe to be in English and had Patamon dismiss a Japanese note as "written in Digi-code".

For the mystery email, they replace the letter entirely with scripting language. Instead, opening the email inexplicably causes an audio file to play and exposit the message for the kids instead.

Computerized Voice: Help me! SOS! Mayday! I'm being held prisoner! Help me escape and I'll guide you to the Crests you seek! Group: Whoa! Sora: Do you think he's for real? I mean, who could it be?

They also changed the email address to www.as#4dfja9z$.com, which isn't even an email address. That's just a URL made up of random letters, numbers, and symbols. You had one job.

Meanwhile, in his trailer, Etemon is furious over having technical difficulties yet again.

(Felt. The Network just came back online last episode and now he's lost the kids again. I'd be mad too.)

Etemon: What the hell is going on here!? Where are the Chosen Children!? Gazimon 1: It's no use, Etemon-sama! I don't see any malfunction on our end! Gazimon 2: But there is an abnormality occurring in the pyramid's host computer. Etemon: Nanomon.... Let's go pay him a visit. Both Gazimon: Yes, sir!

Etemon's trailer takes off towards Nanomon. We cut back to our kids searching the desert, following instructions from their mysterious email contact.

Though Jou's still against this plan, Mimi's come around on it.

Jou: What are we supposed to do if this turns out to be a trap? Mimi: But he might turn out to be on our side, like Gennai-san. Tai: We can't ignore him if he needs help! Koushiro: (walking while carrying his laptop open in one hand and typing with the other) It should be somewhere around here....

As a small thing, I appreciate that Mimi calls him "Gennai-san", the most generic and neutral honorific in Japanese language. Gennai might see himself as a wise old sage shepherding these kids but you fucking earn that -sama and then we'll talk. Right now, we are equals.

In the dub, Jou's reluctance is played up into a full-blown panic attack and Mimi's response is completely different.

Joe: Ohhhh I don't like this. I don't like it one little bit. I don't like the look of it, I don't like the smell of it, I don't like the-- Mimi: Don't have a brain cramp, Joe! You're turning green around the edges. Tai: Yeah! Somebody asked for our help; We gotta at least check it out, right? Izzy: (walking while carrying his laptop open in one hand and typing with the other) According to my laptop, we should be getting close....

For once, it's Mimi having a line added or rewritten to be mean to another character. Naturally, it's Joe, the other butt of the dub's jokes.

As they walk, Sora and Takeru hold their Tags out in their hands like a radar, waiting for the telltale glowing pulse that signals a Crest nearby. Takeru suddenly gets a response.

A nearby cave wall emblazoned with Takeru's Crest calls out to his Tag. The kids approach it and, as usual, the wall vanishes and forms into a Crest that slots into Takeru's Tag. Leaving behind the entrance to a cave.

Takeru: I have my Crest! Tokomon: That's great, Takeru! Yamato: I guess this wasn't a trap after all. Koushiro: He said he'll tell us where the last Crest is after we help him. Taichi: Awesome! Then let's go do that right away!

Their mystery contact is using the old "Half up front, half upon completion" standby. You know this is a good idea when you're getting paid using organized crime methods.

Since Joe hasn't suggested (twice) that this is a trap, Matt doesn't have that setup to retort to. He quips instead.

T.K.: Awesome! My own Crest! Tokomon: Congratulations! Matt: Now, T.K., don't think this means you get to stay up any later. Izzy: Sora's Crest is the only one left to find. Maybe if we rescue this guy, he can lead us to it. Tai: Well, what are we waiting for? To the rescue!

Matt is rigorously enforcing bedtime under Lord of the Flies conditions? XD I mean, honestly, that fits. I can absolutely believe that of him. Must've gotten really good at measuring time by the sun in these last two weeks, though.

While everyone's celebrating, Mimi notices the cave behind them. Its walls are inscribed with more of that Digimon World source code.

Koushiro confirms that this is the programming language he's been learning.

Koushiro: There's no mistake! These are the same characters I've seen before in Andromon's city and Kentarumon's ruins! The only difference is this symbol....

Koushiro brushes out a character from the code with his hand, causing the cave to suddenly be illuminated with no clear light source.

(I love how this directly follows up on his experiment in Andromon's factory, turning the power on and off.)

Koushiro: Just as I thought. In here, energy is produced based on a program. Mimi: What do you mean? Koushiro: For instance, by rewriting the program written on this wall here, I can turn the light on or off. I think if I do this....

Koushiro messes with the coding a little more, causing a visible map to suddenly appear suspended in the air as if it were a projected hologram.

Koushiro: That is a map of our surrounding area. Jou: That can't be.... How can you do stuff like that just by using a program written on a wall? It's not like we're in a computer. Koushiro: (gravely serious) You don't know that. Group: Eh!? Koushiro: I've been thinking that this place, this entire world could be a place where data and programs take physical form. Yamato: I remember you talking about that earlier. Sora: If this is a data world, does that mean us too? Koushiro: Yes. We exist as data, without any real substance. Taichi: No real substance? Like, we don't have flesh and blood? Mimi: Something like yurei (ghosts)? Koushiro: S-Something like that. Yamato: Where are our real selves? Koushiro: Maybe... Back at the campgrounds. The Digimon are "Digital Monsters" in the truest sense. They're lifeforms shaped out of data. Takeru: Then are we inside something like a video game? Koushiro: It's not that simple. Yamato: Could the person who sent the email be made of data too? Koushiro: I don't know....

This is a massive revelation that Koushiro's laying out for everyone. They all missed out on his factory experiment and only Mimi was with him at the ruins, but now he's able to lay out everything he's learned and theorized since he started playing around with the Digimon World's source code.

I've chosen to leave yurei up there because this is our third encounter with spookers and our third word choice, and I wanted that distinction clear. Bakemono, obake, and yurei are all translatable to "ghost" but have different meanings and usages. I called out the previous uses of bakemono and obake; Here, Mimi says yurei which is actually the common idea of a spirit lingering beyond the grave.

The dub makes it seem like Izzy's just figuring this all out for the first time, which is an odd choice.

Izzy: See these hieroglyphs? Look familiar? This is definitely the same writing we've come across before. ...wait a second, this is a new one. (Izzy rubs out the symbol, making the light turn on) Izzy: Prodigious! This is amazing! Do you know what I'm thinking...? Mimi: I've got a feeling you're going to tell us. Izzy: Well, you see, it's quite possible that these hieroglyphs are not a form of writing at all! But rather a code; Computer code! If you change a piece of the code, then you change the program. (Izzy brings up the map) Izzy: Like that, for example! Joe: Wait. Back up. Are you telling us that this whole place is some kind of giant computer game and that none of it is really real!? Izzy: Ohhh, it's real alright! Joe: Huh!? Izzy: Y'know, I'm thinking that everything we see and everybody we meet in this place are actually pieces of data or programming given physical form. Matt: Now, wait a second. If you're right and this whole thing is one big computer, then how did we get here? Did we squeeze in through the floppy drive? Izzy: (chuckle) No, we're just kilobytes of data too. I mean, the versions of us that are in here. Tai: If I'm just data, why do I still feel like I'm flesh and blood? Mimi: And I still have to go to the little girls' room. Izzy: You don't really. You just think you have to. Mimi: Oh. Well, I hope you're right 'cause-- Matt: Where's the real us? Our flesh and blood bodies? Izzy: I dunno. I suppose we're back at the campgrounds still. Yeah, we're alive back there! We exist simultaneously with our other selves. We're in a parallel digital universe like the Digimon. T.K.: Does that mean I don't have to worry about brushing my teeth anymore? Izzy: We've got bigger things to worry about now, T.K. Matt: Although do us all a favor and don't stop brushing. Izzy: Yeah, please!

The line "Oh, it's real, alright!" doesn't go half as hard as Koushiro's stone-faced "Wakari masen yo." This makes me sad but doesn't really hurt the scene.

They took out Mimi's question about ghosts and Izzy's noncommital and kinda spooked answer, replacing it with Izzy telling everyone to stop pooping. A choice, to be sure.

Instead of explaining that the Digimon are living beings made of code, Izzy suggests that the kids' physical bodies are actually consciously living separate lives independently from our version of them. As existentially terrifying as it is wildly off-base. In his defense, it's only a theory, and it's a reasonable assumption based on the theorizing he's done.

I desperately want to know what T.K.'s using to brush his teeth, though. Matt. Matt, I have questions. I have serious questions, Matt.

Suddenly, Koushiro notices something significant.

Koushiro: EH!? Taichi: What's wrong? Koushiro: P-Please wait a minute! I'll make this easier for you guys to understand.

Typing at his computer, Koushiro writes some code of his own to alter the shape of the displayed map. It slowly morphs into a levitating projection of a globe, still displaying the Digimon World.

Koushiro: I've adjusted it so that you can see the entire globe. This includes the program I saw in Andromon's city. If I combine that with the map Gennai-san sent me.... Yamato: It's a big world. It looks about the size of Earth. Koushiro: Actually, it's exactly the same. Yamato: Huh? Koushiro: (pulls up the email) Look at this email address. The computer that sent this email is located.... (A blinking dot appears on the globe map) Koushiro: Right there. It's the same place as an internet homepage I used to visit often! Taichi: What does that mean? Sora: Are you saying that the email came from our world? Koushiro: Not only that.

Koushiro pulls up a second projection, showing the Earth. Both globes are then covered in lines.

Koushiro: Over on the right is the Earth that we know. If you put our computer network system on top of this world.... (The two globes merge into each other and fade away, leaving only the network lines perfectly matched to each other) Sora: The shape of the networks is exactly the same! Mimi: Ehh? What does this all mean? Koushiro: This is a world made only of data. The same as you'd find in a video game or computer. But that doesn't mean we're in a place far away from Earth. We're inside the computer network itself! In other words, Digimon World is the same place as our world! You could even call it the Earth's shadow! Jou: This... This was Earth!?!?

Even more massive revelations laid out by Koushiro. We didn't Isekai to a far off fantasy world, but to the internet itself. A reflection of the world born of the data flowing through every system on Earth.

In the dub:

Izzy: Hey! Wait a second, I've got an idea. Let me see, if I can just crack this program.... Mimi: Uh-oh. He's in computer dork mode. This could take a while. (Izzy forms the map into a globe) Izzy: I've called up a holographic map of the Digi-World. You can see how physically similar it is to the planet Earth. In fact, there are a lot of parallels with our world Matt: (sarcastic) That's terrific, Izzy. Great time for a geography lesson. Izzy: Pay attention and you might learn something. Matt: Yeah? Izzy: (pulls up the email) If I enter the email address of the person who contacted us, I can find his location in the Digi-World here. (A blinking dot appears on the globe map) Izzy: Now look: That email address is from a web domain in our world. I've logged onto it a thousand times. Tai: Is there a point to this somewhere!? Sora: Is the person who sent the message in our world or the Digi-World? Izzy: That's just the thing: He's in both. (Izzy pulls up the two globe projections) Izzy: Look. The Digi-World's on the left. The world we know is on the right. And if I overlay them like so.... (The two globes merge into each other and fade away, leaving only the unexplained lattice lines perfectly matched to each other) Sora: The white lines match up perfectly! What does it mean? Mimi: (crying) Reminds me of the balls of yarn my kitty used to play with! Izzy: That's the world's digital network. Through those lines, every computer on Earth is connected to every other computer. The Digi-World is the physical embodiment of the data passing through them! Guys, we're seeing something nobody else has ever seen, that nobody even knows about: The digital shadow world that exists alongside our own. And they're not just parallel, they're physically linked so that anything we do here will have effects on the other. Joe: For real? Intense.

Everyone's weirdly hostile to Izzy's exposition in the dub. He's laying down intense revelations about the nature of the world they've been trapped in, and they're like, "Ugh, here he goes ranting about nothing again, CAN WE MOVE ON YET!?"

Also, I think Mimi's cat is dead. Absolutely nobody is interested in engaging that out-of-the-blue conversation topic.

That aside, this section of exposition goes really well. We lose Koushiro signaling to continuity by referencing Gennai's map and Andromon, but we gain Mimi signaling to continuity by referencing Kentarumon's ruins so there's that. However, Izzy's infodump itself, his explanation of what Digi-World is and what it means to be here, is solid.

So now we know the true nature of the world we're in. Question is, where do we go from here?

Takeru: So, can we go home soon, then? Yamato: No. It isn't like that. We're close, but we're not on Earth itself. Jou: (distraught) Now I'm more confused than ever on what to do. Gomamon: What do you mean by that? You've got me! Piyomon: Sora, I didn't understand most of that but does this mean you're leaving? Sora: No, it looks like we still have stuff to do so we can't leave until that's done. Taichi: Yeah! Anyways, we should save the guy who sent that email first. Where do we go from here, Koushiro? Koushiro: Well, if I run this program that was attached to the email.... Agumon: The wall! Gabumon: I can see outside!

The projection of the world vanishes. The wall behind it vanishes with it, creating an opening to the outside.

In the dub:

Izzy: And here's the coolest part: Wherever this person is in the Digi-World, I think I can take us there just by entering his email address and clicking on it. Like accessing a web page! T.K.: Hey! All this techno-talk is making my head spinny! Matt: Computer guys can never just do something, T.K. They gotta spend all day telling you how they'll do it! Joe: This is depressing. Even when I'm computer data, I have allergies! Gomamon: Look on the bright side, Joe! If you weren't here, you never would have met me! Biyomon: Sora! Does this mean that we don't exist? That we're really not friends? Sora: Of course not! This may be a make-believe world but that doesn't mean our friendship isn't real. Truthfully, I don't get it, but it sounds right! Tai: Oh well. Wherever we are, we're here, so let's figure out what we're gonna do next. Come on, Brainiac, what are you waiting for!? Izzy: Okay, okay! All I have to do is click on the guy's email address and then bingo. Mimi: I hate bingo! It's so confusing with all those different letters and numbers and--Hey, look! A door!

Entirely different. The main plot shift here is that Izzy devises a plan to use the Digital World's nature to shortcut the team to their destination, rather than using a program their contact sent them.

Both versions have their advantages; The former plays into Izzy's brilliance and allows him to turn all this information he's uncovered into tangible results, while the latter reveals that our mystery contact is as knowledgeable about all this as Koushiro, capable of manipulating the environment through code. The dub version is a good hype moment for Izzy, while the original is a stepping stone in developing the plot.

But the rest of the dialogue is just more dunking on The Nerd and one-off gags from Mimi and Joe. This riffing lets them talk over the part where the kids express the anxieties of being alone and lost in this hostile world and its expectations of them.

Taichi: What just happened!? Koushiro: The sender should be outside here. Sora: Eh!? He was that close to us!? Koushiro: No. Apparently, that program serves to warp and connect airspace.

The kids emerge in another part of the desert, bearing no resemblance to the craggy valley they came from. Per Koushiro, they've effectively created a shortcut between two spaces in the Digimon World.

(It's basically the same thing as what happened in the cave Taichi got his Crest from, when they escaped Etemon by slipping through a back wall to a new geographical region far away from the Koromon Village he was attacking.)

In the dub:

Tai: Alright! Last one through's a rotten egg! Izzy: Our electronic pen pal is right out there! Sora: Or it could be a trap! Izzy: No way! We're just bits of data so I uploaded us as file attachments a-- Sora: (annoyed) Okay, I believe you!

Apparently this can't be a trap anymore because we're all file attachments. I have no idea what that's even supposed to mean.

We also don't get the explanation that the two caves are now linked in space, tying back to the Crest cave, because that's not what happened in the dub. Izzy just Fast Travelled us.

Outside the cave, the kids get a glimpse of their destination.

This is where their mystery contact sent the email from. Oh, and look! We've seen that thing in the distance before, haven't we? Taichi whips out his mini telescope to confirm: It's Etemon's trailer. He's here too.

Etemon emerges from the trailer and furiously marches into the pyramid, uttering:

Etemon: I'm here to punish you, Nanomon.

Looks like we know who our contact is. (If that brief scene of Etemon earlier didn't already make it apparent.)

In the dub:

Etemon: That's it! It's the dumpster for you, Datamon, you old pile of junk! Joe: Uhh, I think I left the water running back in the Sphinx.

In the dub, Nanomon is called Datamon. Not quite sure why they changed it; Probably assumed American kids wouldn't understand what nanotech is to get the reference.

With both their mystery contact and Etemon here, the kids do the only responsible thing!

They fucking leave, of course. Giving Etemon a wide berth for whatever the hell he's doing and making camp back in the valley side of their space wormhole. Plan is to infiltrate the pyramid tomorrow morning, bright and early.

We join Taichi that night as his shift ends and Sora comes to relieve him. It's not clear when exactly they stopped being chauvinistic about the nightwatch shifts but it's a solid improvement.

Sora: Taichi.... Piyomon: It's time to change shifts. Agumon: Thank goodness! I was starting to get tired. Good night! (Agumon heads inside) Taichi: Me too. I should get some sleep to prepare for tomorrow. Sora: I'm sorry, Taichi. Taichi: Huh? Sora: Ultimately, you're going to all this trouble just for my Crest and to help the sender of that email, right? Taichi: That's how it turned out. Anyway, I'm not the sort of guy who turns his back on someone in trouble! Sora: ... Taichi: You're not acting like yourself, Sora. Sora: Eh? Taichi: If it was your Crest we found first, would you be as bothered by this as you are now? Sora: ...I doubt I even would have thought about it. Taichi: See? Besides, we're just data now. No point in thinking too seriously about all this! Sora: If we return to our world, do you think we'll remember our experiences and the Digimon we met in this world? Taichi: Who knows?

Sora's having "Am I a burden?" anxieties right now. By her own admission, she would storm that pyramid without a second's thought if it was for someone else's Crest, but the fact that it's hers gives her pause.

Taichi, meanwhile, expresses an alarming takeaway from Koushiro's infodump.

In the dub:

Sora: Okay, Tai. You're relieved. Biyomon: It's our turn to stand watch! Agumon: Finally! It's not much fun watching a bunch of rocks. (yawn) Good night! (Agumon heads inside) Taichi: I thought being in a computer cartoon adventure would be more fun than this! Sora: A-About tomorrow.... Tai: What? Sora: I'm worried. That Etemon is bad news. Is it really worth it just to find my crest? Tai: Sure! Don't worry, Sora! Piece of cake! I'm looking forward to spinning that ugly monkey around by his tail! Sora: ... Tai: Hey, come on! Snap out of it! Sora: Huh? Tai: Look, if it was my Crest or T.K.'s or anyone else's we were going after, you know you wouldn't hesitate for a second. Sora: Oh... Maybe you're right. It's just, after what Izzy said-- Tai: What? You mean all that stuff about us being nothing but little kilobytes in the great computer program of life? Sora: It just makes us seem so small and insignificant. Like nothing we do really matters. Tai: Of course it matters. We can't take the chance that it doesn't.

Sora's anxieties here are presented straight, but everything else around it is changed. The aside about Taichi wanting to save the email sender is changed to Tai wanting to kick Etemon's ass and show how cool he is. This is probably meant to convey Tai's overconfidence, since they also cut Taichi's alarming "Why take it seriously if we're just data" bit.

That part and Sora worrying about losing memory of the Digimon are removed. In their place, we get an out-of-place existentialist debate about purpose and destiny in a nihilistic universe, that seems entirely unrelated to anything Izzy said back there.

The next morning, we find Sora clarifying details with Koushiro hours after Taichi's gone to bed.

Koushiro: Even though I said we're digitized, our data is bulky and elaborate. Considering the large amount of data that's been shifted into this world, it would probably cause feedback when we return to our own world. Sora: So, in other words, we should still treat ourselves as if we have real bodies, right? Koushiro: It's best to think that way. Sora: Right. Just as I thought, we shouldn't act irresponsibly just because we're data now. Taichi: (from the passage) HEY!!! WHAT ARE YOU DOING OVER THERE!?!? HURRY UP!!! Sora: Coming!

This is a critical contrast of the idea Taichi expressed earlier. He suggested we're just data so nothing matters, and now Koushiro is saying NO NO NO EVERYTHING MATTERS. Unfortunately, Taichi isn't the one hearing it.

In the dub:

Izzy: Remember, there's one thing that's important to keep in mind: This is more than a parallel universe. It's a shadow world physically linked to our own. Anything that happens here in the Digi-World can have a direct effect on things in the other. Sora: Then... the same thing goes for us, right? We're shadow versions of our other selves! Izzy: Right! Exact computer copies. Sora: So whatever happens, we have to be just as careful as if we were still our physical selves. Tai: HEY!!! Sometime this year! Man, you guys talk more than my mom's book club! CAN WE GO!?!? Sora: Alright!

The important context gets across: Do not behave recklessly because what happens to us here in Digi-World has real consequences. Both versions, however, are vastly different in how they lay it out.

Honestly, I think the dub's explanation is a lot more digestible. "Physically linked; What happens to one happens to the other" is a pretty common concept in virtual-world storytelling. If you cut off my arm in the simulation then my arm somehow falls off in the real world. Got it.

But in the original it's like. Okay. So. My arm isn't here, it's in the real world. I just have the idea of having an arm transformed into data and then made physical here. So if you cut off my arm... like, my real arm isn't here, so it should be fine. What happens then when it feeds back into my brain? My physical arm is still there. Do I lose the ability to move my arm or something because the data of Having Arms had the data of Severance coded into it?

As a stake, "There would be feedback because of the size of our data packets" is a lot harder to wrap my head around than "What happens in the video game HAPPENS IN REAL LIFE."

But either way, the point is made: The stakes are real so do not be stupid and reckless. Now let's go watch Taichi be stupid and reckless.

Bright and early in the mouth of the sphinx, the kids plan their rescue mission.

Koushiro: There's a hidden passageway in the pyramid that's normally not visible. Jou: Our first and foremost priority is to save the sender and get Sora-kun's Crest. DO NOT get caught up in any unnecessary fighting! Taichi: Yeah, yeah, I know.... Takeru: I wanted to go too.... Yamato: Don't be selfish, Takeru. Mimi: Be careful, everyone. Palmon: Keep steady. Gomamon: I'll be fine, no worries! Taichi: Yeah! Back soon! (leaps from the sphinx's mouth)

The team splits up from here. Taichi, Sora, Jou, and Koushiro leave on the field mission while Yamato hangs back with Mimi and Takeru.

(This is a well-reasoned division of duties. Jou-senpai and the two athletes are going into the intensely perilous infiltration, while Big Brother Yamato hangs back to watch over the younger kids.

With exception of Koushiro, who's on the field team because his laptop is critical to this operation and we don't have a means of communicating long-range. Though Koushiro is also an athlete, which is easy to forget. This is literally Senpai and the Soccer Team infiltrating the pyramid. Either way, it shows the kids are starting to think tactically.)

In the dub:

Izzy: I got into the program and found the most direct route to the center of the pyramid. Joe: Okay now, let's get this straight: We're only going in there to find this guy and get Sora her Crest, right? Tai: (dismissive) Right, right.... Joe: That means no fights or adventures or dangerous stuff! Tai: You whimper more than my puppy! Matt, Mimi, T.K., stay here and stand guard. Let's go in! Mimi: If you really don't think you need me.... Palmon: I miss you guys already! Gomamon: We'll be back in time to eat! Tai: Or get eaten!

The dub reframes the whole conversation to put Tai in the leadership role instead of Joe. This is tragic for Joe, since stepping up and taking charge of the op here is a great moment for Jou-senpai.

It also seems that they did not plan this in advance, as Dub Leader Tai makes the decision to separate Matt, T.K., and Mimi out from the group right here in the spur of the moment.

It does, however, do a great job of conveying Tai's problematic cockiness. He is appropriately insufferable in this scene.

The forward team makes their way to the pyramid, following Koushiro's instructions. Once they arrive, however, he needs a moment to locate their secret entrance.

Koushiro: The hidden passage should be up ahead on this side of the pyramid.

Taichi scouts around the corner and spots Etemon emerging from the main entrance. Etemon yawns and stretches, having seemingly just woken up.

Taichi: (near-silent gasp, hides around corner) Agumon: (whisper) What's wrong, Taichi? Taichi: (whisper) It's Etemon! Jou: GEH!!!

Jou claps his hands over his mouth but it's too late. Etemon heard that. He turns, approaching the corner.

Etemon: Who's there?

The kids stand flat against the side of the pyramid, maximizing how long they have until he spots them. But it's only a matter of time.

Piyomon: What do we do, Sora!? Sora: Don't talk!

Finally, Etemon rounds the corner to... absolutely nothing.

Etemon: Am I hearing things?

Taichi then makes mocking gestures at Etemon through the secret entrance Koushiro found. Because he once again thinks he's invincible right now. It's SkullGreymon all over again.

Etemon: Huh? I don't know why, but I feel like someone was mocking me. That's so irritating! I'll go sing a song or something to amuse myself.

Etemon storms off to go jam out his feelings while Taichi has a good chuckle to himself.

In the dub, as they make their way to the team, Tai's given a fairly basic command line to reinforce his leadership in this version.

Tai: Okay! Keep together!

Then the group approaches the pyramid.

Izzy: There's a hidden backdoor to the program you can use to get in. (The kids approach the pyramid) Izzy: That's funny. It should be right here. Etemon: Where's my friend banana sandwich!? (Taichi scouts around the corner) Etemon: You know I like to eat after my nap! Tai: WAUGH!!! (hides around corner) Joe: (whispers) Tai, what is it? Tai: (whispers) It's Etemon! Joe: WAUGH!!! Etemon: (noticing) Eh? Who's there? Biyomon: What do we do now? Sora: Quiet, Biyomon.

Here, the dub uses Etemon's line to alert Tai to check around the corner, rather than him just scouting out to watch the team's back. That's a lateral change, I think. Both versions work.

(Also, I love Izzy describing the hidden entrance as "a backdoor to the program". That's clever.)

Joe's still the one who reflexively shrieks and gives the game away, but I don't know how Etemon didn't hear Tai's equally loud yelp a moment before.

Then, during Tai's teasing, he calls out to Etemon too.

Etemon: (rounds corner) BOO!!! (nobody's there) Great, now I'm hearing things. Tai: YOO-HOO!!! Etemon: Huh? (no one's there) Y'know, I'm gonna have to have this place completely exterminated! Because something's startin' to bug me!

Not the best quip they've written. Etemon's forced to set up a non-sequitur just so he can then make a pun out of it. But the line it replaces wasn't exactly super critical or comedy gold either so, again, lateral change.

As soon as Taichi's back inside the passage, Sora lays into him for that.

Taichi: He's gone. We're fine now. Sora: Don't act stupid! What if he caught us!? Taichi: It's fine, we're fine!

Meanwhile, Senpai has his eye on the ball and is ready to move ahead.

Jou: So this is the hidden passageway. Koushiro: It looks like data from the outside, but really there's nothing in it. Agumon: Let me see! (slaps the wall, hurting his hand) Koushiro: Everything besides the passage is comprised of data, so please be careful.

Agumon fundamentally misunderstood what Izzy was saying.

In the dub:

Joe: Well, now that we're in, what do we do? Izzy: I guess next we try to find a way through these walls. The trick is finding the weak points! Agumon: Hey, I found one! (slaps the wall, hurting his hand) Izzy: As I was saying, Agumon, the trick is finding the weak points. Let's use heads, not hands.

That's not even remotely what Koushiro said but it does connect to what they're doing. As they explore the passage, they find other fake walls leading to other parts of the pyramid. Those are the "weak points" that Izzy's referring to.

Taichi: We can see outside from here. Koushiro: Yes. But no one can see us from the other side. Agumon: Ah! Gazimon!

A pair of Gazimon pass by in front of the "wall", noticing nothing and continuing about their business.

Sora: Keep quiet....

Taichi does not keep quiet. Emerging from the fake wall, he kicks a Gazimon in the back and then ducks back inside.

Gazimon 1: HEY!!! WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT!?!? Gazimon 2: What? Gazimon 1: DON'T PLAY DUMB!!! YOU JUST KICKED ME!!! Gazimon 2: No, I didn't. Gazimon 1: LIAR!!!

This erupts into a fistfight, as the kicked Gazimon lunges for the other in retaliation. All while Taichi laughs quietly behind the hidden door.

In the dub, for reasons that can only imply some sort of problem with actor availability and redubbing or something, Wendee Lee (Takeru) suddenly voices Tai for exactly one line. It's incredibly noticeable.

Takeru: (possessing Taichi's body and speaking through his lips) Hey, check it out! You can see right through this wall! Izzy: Yeah, here it is. It's another breach in the system's security. Agumon: LOOK!!! GAZIMON!!! (Gazimon pass by) Sora: Be still.... (Tai runs out and kicks one) Gazimon 1: HEY!!! WHAT'S THE BIG IDEA!?!? Gazimon 2: What do you mean? Gazimon 1: Don't give me that! Just 'cause the boss likes ME! Gazimon 2: Have you gone nuts!? Gazimon 1: NUTS TO YOU!!!

For the good, I'm still enjoying the hidden passage being a "breach in system security". Also, the fight Tai provokes inadvertently revealing bad blood and workplace drama between the Gazimon got me. XD Fantastic addition.

For the bad... whatever the hell is going on with Tai's voice, of course. Did they forget to dub a line and need to make due? What's happening here? But also, Sora's line change from "Be quiet" to "Be still" doesn't make sense. They can't see us. We're not hiding from a Jurassic Park T-Rex, we're trying not to be overheard.

Sora, of course, is livid after that stunt.

(Reasonably so. By now, Taichi would definitely have been vote-kicked out of the party if that was an option. He is going to get us killed.)

Sora: WHY DID YOU DO THAT!?!? WHAT IF THEY FOUND OUT THAT WAS YOU!?!? Jou: Sora-kun, keep your voice down. Taichi: You worry too much, Sora. We're just data, y'know. Sora: TAICHI, YOU-- Jou: Sora-kun! Shhhh! Shhhhhh!!!

I really feel for Sora here. I get where Jou's coming from. See above, re: we're invisible, not inaudible. Screams echoing down the halls can easily give us away.

But so can these stunts Taichi keeps pulling. It's unfair for Jou to only be criticizing her and not Taichi. Rolled a 4 on his Senpai Check here.

In the dub:

Sora: You could have gotten us all captured back there, Tai! YOU'RE SO IMMATURE!!! Joe: Could you yell a little quieter, huh? Tai: Geeze, Sora. Relax, kid. Get a grip. Who elected you the Queen of the Fun Police? Sora: Yes, this is tons of fun. And getting caught will be a blast! Joe: Couldn't you just pass notes? It's much quieter.

As before, Joe comes off weaker in this scene because he's not team leader, and can only whine helplessly instead of shutting Sora down. His second line of whining, however, is hilarious. XD

The biggest shift here is Tai's line, which makes him look even more immature. They also cut his rationale for his behavior, but only to move it to the next scene. It's still here and still motivating him.

The kids next come upon a deadly electric fence barring the path forward.

Tentomon: Is there electricity running through this, or is it juts me? Koushiro: The section that acts as a hidden entryway should only have harmless data in it. Jou: So that means everything else really is electrified? Gomamon: (teasing) You look scared, Jou. Jou: Of course I am! Taichi: You're too timid, Jou. So, where's the entrance? Koushiro: It's... There. (points) Taichi: Okay.

Without an ounce of hesitation, Taichi walks straight through the spot Koushiro pointed out on the deadly barrier, passing through harmlessly while everyone gasps in surprise. After a moment, he peeks back out and urges the rest to hurry up. One by one, they follow after while Sora visibly remains steaming.

Sora says nothing in this entire scene. She is biting her tongue because Senpai reprimanded her. But her fury is plain on her face every time she's in the shot.

In the dub:

Tentomon: This looks nasty! We don't have to go through here, do we? Izzy: This firewall is the system's last line of defense, but htere appears to be only one safe way through it. Joe: And if we pick the wrong way, they'll scoop us up with a spatula! Gomamon: (teasing) You're not scared, are you, Joe? Joe: Maybe I am, a little! Tai: Relax, it's not like we're human or anything. We're just bunches of kilobytes, remember? Izzy: The waypoint should be... Here. (points) Tai: Cool!

Here's where Tai's "No consequences because we're data" rationale comes in for the dub. We also have Izzy referring to the barrier as a firewall. Which is the implication in the original but I still like hearing him refer to everything here by computer terminology.

No indication is made in the dub for why Sora is suddenly silent but fuming. She just. Is.

The kids emerge at their destination: A chamber deep inside the pyramid with a glass cage containing their target.

Koushiro: Here's our destination. Taichi: Here? Tentomon: That's... I'm pretty sure that's Nanomon. He's a very smart Digimon.

The dub takes this as an opportunity for some quipping.

Izzy: This is the host computer. Tai: Yowza. Do you think it comes with a CD-ROM drive or is that optional? Sora: And what do you suppose that thing is? Tentomon: I've heard of him. His name's Datamon.

They also add Sora's voice to this scene, but that's fine. She hadn't come out of the wall yet last we saw but she'll be there after the rundown, and talking again now that we're here. It's just Taichi's shittiness that she's being silent about.

From here, the narrator delivers his rundown. Nanomon is a Perfect-stage Virus-type Machine Digimon, so we'd better be sure we know what we're doing before we let him out.

Narrator: Nanomon. No matter what kind of computer system he's up against, he can rebuild it. A Perfect-Stage Machine Digimon.

Apparently he can't rebuild his way out of this cage, though.

In the dub, Tentomon does the honors.

Tentomon: A super-intelligent robotic Digimon. He disappeared without a trace some time ago. Nobody ever knew what happened to him.

It's weird that Tentomon would know that when he's never left File Island, but it was also weird in the original when he recognized Nanomon to begin with. Tentomon knows about Nanomon/Datamon somehow. It is what it is.

I think we've pretty much obsoleted "I don't know anything outside File Island" as a plot point.

From here, Nanomon makes contact.

Sora: Could that Digimon be the one who sent the email? Nanomon: (appears on Koushiro's computer screen) That's exactly right, Chosen Children!

Koushiro glances over at Nanomon's physical body and sees that his right eye, the one that's an LED light, has a red light blinking in it.

Koushiro: I see. He's sending data directly through my IR port! Nanomon: I once fought Etemon long ago and was crushed. My broken body was sealed away here. On top of having my ability to formulate stolen, I was tasked with supervising Etemon's network system. One day, I recovered my memories and began to slowly repair my body in a way Etemon wouldn't notice. Soon I learned about everything happening outside, and I was able to meddle with that information. However, I need a considerable amount of outside help to release me from confinement. Sora: Do you really know where my Crest is? Nanomon: Of course! I know many things that Etemon himself has not even heard of. Jou: Can we really trust him? Nanomon: You and I share a common enemy in Etemon. You can trust me. Taichi: Okay then, what should we do? Nanomon: Follow my instructions.

This is Nanomon's critical importance to the story: He is the mainframe through which the Dark Network runs. In a sense, he is the Network.

Nanomon transmits directions for the kids to follow. Taichi pulls down a lever to open an access panel while Koushiro inputs the combination. All that's left to do is for Taichi to release the leaver; However, suddenly they hear a voice calling out.

Etemon: Hold it! Taichi: Etemon! Etemon: Of course we'd catch you after everything you've done. We have surveillance cameras here, y'know!

The two Gazimon enter the room, both with bandaged faces.

Gazimon 1: How dare you-- Gazimon 2: --do that to us! Taichi: Whoops, they found out! Jou: BECAUSE OF YOU, TAICHI!!!

Correction: Taichi isn't going to get us killed. Taichi has already gotten us killed. My mistake. At least Jou finally berates Taichi for the shit he's been pulling instead of staying quiet. Vindication for Sora-kun.

Etemon then turns to momentarily adress Nanomon.

Etemon: My network's been acting funny ever since the children landed on this continent. That was you, wasn't it? Nanomon: I finished my maintenance just before the arrived.

Remember that weird glitch, where Etemon's data didn't update and sent him to some beach while they disembarked on a cliffside instead? Remember how SkullGreymon trashing the Coliseum somehow brought down the entire network all across the desert? All Nanomon. He's been sabotaging Etemon from the get-go.

In the dub:

Etemon: Hold it! Tai: Etemon! Etemon: I've been watchin' you on surveillance cameras and you're an annoying little brat, y'know that? (The Gazimon enter) Gazimon 1: Punk kid! Gazimon 2: Troublemaker! Tai: Hey, it's been my pleasure! Joe: Great, why don't you just call him ugly too. Etemon: And all this time, I thought it was those snot-nosed kids that were causing my network to go on the fritz! But it was you, wasn't it, you digital dumpster!? Datamon: Well, in a word: Yes.

Again, Joe is forced to whine instead of snap at Tai because he's not in the position of authority here.

I like Etemon calling Datamon a "digital dumpster", however. Rolls off the tongue nicely, especially in his Elvis voice.

After confirming this one point with Nanomon, the moment we've all been desperately trying to stave off finally arrives. Letting out a hideous battle cry, Etemon suddenly roars across the room to tear these children in half.

We are absolutely no match for the Strongest in Konoyo. Self-proclaimed or not.

The kids keep nothing in reserve here. Greymon, Kabuterimon, Birdramon, and Ikkakumon all power up at once to hold back Etemon. They achieve nothing. Etemon lays Greymon out with a single punch. He grabs Ikkakumon by the horn, flinging him into Kabuterimon to take them both out.

Realizing they're going to die in seconds, Taichi yanks that lever up to finish opening Nanomon's prison. Nanomon goes straight to action, seizing control of the prison mechanism. The triangular panes of glass that had formed his prison now under his control, he sends them all at Etemon at once.

Nanomon: See for yourself how strong you've made this prison!!!

Two panes strike the Gazimon, crushing them against the wall. One hits Birdramon, crushing her so severely she loses her form and reverts to Piyomon. And one goes for Etemon, which breaks easily against his unstoppable fist.

(I don't think Etemon is impressed by how strong he made that prison, Nanomon. What else you got?)

Taichi whirls on Nanomon for his friendly fire incident.

Taichi: What are you doing!? Nanomon: You are of no further use! Etemon: Hehehehehe.... That's the kind of guy Nanomon is. Nanomon: Enough blabber, PLUG BOMB!!!

The dub hits the same points but it's worth noting that Datamon's attitude is different.

Tai: HEY!!! We set you free! Datamon: And I do appreciate that, you chumps! Etemon: Dumb kids. Hehehehe, you'd think by now they'd learn to trust no one! Datamon: Trust me: This will hurt!

Datamon has the attitude of a maniacal fiend who feels he has the upper hand, while Nanomon is just screaming blood fury. Nanomon hit Birdramon because he's attacking indiscriminately. She was caught in crossfire. Nanomon will kill as many people as he has to as long as Etemon is one of them. While Datamon... may have done that on purpose? Unclear.

Nanomon unloads his signature attack Plug Bomb, opening his fingers into separate guns to fire little red bullet bees. Etemon counters with Dark Spirits, a fireball made of concentrated darkness energy.

The dub doesn't give Datamon's attack a name. Etemon confusingly calls his "Dark Network!" even though that's. Not. What. That means. Okay.

Dark Spirits and Plug Bomb explode on impact, creating a blast that tears up through the desert sands outside. We cut briefly to Gabumon watching for the others' return from the sphinx's mouth.

Gabumon: YAMATO, LOOK!!! (Yamato and Mimi peek around Gabumon) Yamato: Huh? THEY'RE FIGHTING!!! Mimi: EH!?!?

It's at this point in the dub that we have the most baffling flub I have seen in the show yet. The lines are basically the same, but Mimi's reaction is cut and Matt's more sarcastic.

Gabumon: Uh-oh! Matt! Matt: Huh? Well, so much for no fighting!

However, overlaid on top of this dialogue are the voices of two random actual children, not any performer in the show. speaking at the same time as Gabumon and Matt in louder voices that drown them out.

Random Child 1: Biyomon, over here! Random Child 2: I'm coming!

What the actual fuck. At least now we have confirmation that they didn't bother doing second takes of anything. They weren't even giving the show a once-over before sending it to publication. Anybody would have caught this.

Was this localization done on a budget of $5? That's not a sarcastic question. It was an anime dub for a FOX cartoon show in the 90's. It's a very strong possibility that the project wasn't given much attention or funding. I'm not trying to be mean here. But. Wow. I had to google the Random Child Voices to make sure I wasn't hallucinating.

Back inside the pyramid, we find Sora at Piyomon's side trying to rouse her. Piyomon is unconscious and unmoving on the floor.

Suddenly Nanomon slams into the wall overhead and crumples to the floor, tossed by Etemon.

Etemon: I win again. Nanomon: The only thing you're good at is fighting, you monkey!

Thinking quickly, Nanomon suddenly grabs Sora and Piyomon.

Nanomon: Once I use their true power, your defeat is certain!

Nanomon vanishes through an open door, dragging Sora and Piyomon with him. Etemon tries to pursue, but Greymon, Ikkakumon, and Kabuterimon form a barrier in front of him.

The kids slip through the door to chase down Nanomon while Etemon's busy ripping through their Digimon. The dub cuts a shot, just after they leave, of Greymon getting bodied again. Guess they wanted it to look more hopeful.

The kids find the firewall standing in their way.

Sora: (echoing voice) TAICHI!!! Koushiro: He escaped through the hidden passageway! Taichi: I'm sure... That spot is where her voice came from.

Taichi starts to approach where he thinks the passage is, but Koushiro calls after him.

Koushiro: Wait! I have to verify the location first! Taichi: We're just data, remember? If I make a mistake, I'll just start over. Koushiro: PLEASE STOP!!! Jou: Got him!

Jou grabs Taichi suddenly from behind, restraining him from touching the firewall.

Taichi: Hey! Let go! Sora is-- Koushiro: Taichi-san, do you think that, just because you're data, you're free to act like a video game character!? Taichi: (stops resisting) ...am I wrong? Koushiro: COMPLETELY!!! It's exactly the same as if we were living and breathing here. If you die here, you'll really die. Taichi: ...what? That... that can't be....

Taichi turns and looks at the firewall once more, and now the peril becomes real for him.

Taichi: It can't be.... I didn't think I'd really die.... Jou: (releases him) Taichi.... Koushiro: The hidden passage is one meter to the right.

Not only can Taichi die. But if Jou hadn't grabbed him, he would have died. His guess was wrong.

Now understanding the danger of the firewall, Taichi freezes up. He can't bring himself to move.

Taichi: What... What's wrong with me? Sora's in danger!

No matter how he tries to motivate himself, his body simply won't move.

The dub plays all of this drama straight. The only gag they add is Jou's line when he grabs Taichi.

Joe: Pain still hurts, Tai!

They also move Izzy's reveal of the gap's location to an earlier shot with his back turned, when Tai's realizing the lethality of the fence. This is so they can extend Tai's reluctance and make it a group activity.

Izzy: The weak point is one meter to your right. Tai: No way... Just one false move and it's over.... Joe: (releases him) Hey, Tai.... Izzy: It's safe, Tai. We came through it alright on the way in. Tai: Yeah, but then I didn't know that.... Izzy: Go on! It's okay. Joe: Come on, Tai, we're wasting time! Sora needs us. What's wrong with you? Izzy: Tai?

Joe's last line is delivered so casually, it's like they're just talking about moving Sora's couch. What do you think is wrong with him, Joe? You can get these things from context!

As Taichi remains paralyzed with terror, time runs out.

Etemon breaks down the wall using the three Partner Digimon that were fighting him in order to get inside the hidden passage.

Agumon: No good... Taichi... He's too strong for us.... Etemon: (turning towards the kids) Now that it's come to this, I'll start with you.

He doesn't get a chance. Garurumon and Togemon come through the ceiling, unloading Chiku Chiku Bang-Bang and Fox Fire before he knows what hit him. He easily shields himself from Garurumon's blue flames while Togemon's needles don't even faze him.

But it buys the kids a moment to escape, with Yamato physically grabbing the catatonic Taichi to force him to move.

Etemon: What!? This isn't enough to take me down-- Huh? Where did they go?

Etemon is left comically clueless. In the dub, he outright whines.

Etemon: No! Not again! They didn't get away again! Aww, I'm havin' an extremely bad day, bay-beh!

Poor Monkey Elvis. XD He should go sing a song to amuse himself.

It's not super clear which way they went but the camera fixes on the ceiling hole, so probably not the firewall.

The kids regroup on the far side of the shortcut passage, in the craggy valley where they made camp.

While Yamato, Mimi, and Takeru are informed of what became of Sora, we close on this shot of Taichi weeping.

Yamato: I see. Sora and Piyomon were taken.... Taichi: Damn it... Damn it....

The dub's final exchange is a lot more verbose, with Matt shifted to being accusatory.

Matt: I don't get it. When the creep grabbed Sora and Biyomon, why didn't you go through the firewall after them!? Tai: I couldn't... I couldn't move.... Joe: It's not your fault. We're all in this together, Tai. We'll find a way to get them back. Tai: It's all my fault! Sora! It's all my fault!

But credit to the dub team for ending on a downer and not undercutting it in any way. This is a pleasant surprise after Mimi's Crest episode.

Assessment: As a fallible character who makes mistakes and has to learn from them, I love Taichi. But I am starting to see why Sora fell for Yamato instead, though that's still a few years off. Even if this was a video game, Taichi's behavior would be incredibly obnoxious to the rest of his party.

In his defense, he's 11. He can be forgiven for acting childish when he's literally a child. But he does have a lot of growing up to do. Which is, of course, what this two-parter is about. This is the setup for Taichi's payoff next episode. He has to fall before he can rise.

But it's also wearing kinda thin because we just did this. This is SkullGreymon again. Taichi acting like a reckless hotshot and making awful choices out of insecure overconfidence only to be brutally and horrifically humbled is something we already did only a few episodes ago. The reasons have changed but the behavior and story trajectory are the same.

But, repetitive Taichi aside, I love the way Etemon's Dark Network ultimately proves to be the centerpiece of this story. This makes it distinct from the way Devimon's Black Gears were used, always in a subordinate capacity. The reveal that Etemon's Dark Network has been purposely working against him all along is brilliant and pays off all of the episodes leading up to it.

Don't fuck with the IT guy.

Meanwhile, the dub of this one... has... random children dubbed over the characters. Like. There is nothing I can say that would possibly lay out the flaws in this one moreso than that. I don't actually give letter grades to these episodes except as a punchline, but even so this one gets an F.

It does have parts that I like, and I especially love the way Izzy describes moving through the pyramid as a hacking effort into a system. But it also has random children dubbed over the characters. Oh my god, watch your show one time before releasing it to publication.

[erisenyo]

Questions for fic writers 1, 3, 5

Anon thank you so much for indicating the ask game, I did not realize I reblogged them both so close together lol

What inspired you to start writing fanfiction?

Epistles by Lady_of_the_Flowers lol. It is an absolutely stellar fic and I couldn't get it out of my head when I finished it. I kept imagining how the story might have gone on, what their BSS reunion could have looked like, how they might have found their happy ending...

And eventually I couldn't get it out of my head to the point that I wrote the BSS reunion (the teashop alley scene for any Burning Bright readers). And then I went hm, this could be better with a bit of context... (880K words later.)

3. Are there any specific themes you enjoy exploring in your fics?

I LOVE playing around with perception! How can two people experience the same event but interpret it differently because of their different frames of references. How can a character's behavior suddenly be recast in an entirely different light because of revelations about their background. How does an external POV contextualize or challenge or reframe an event. How does the reader's own perception come into play, whether through canon events or tropes or genre conventions, where expectation builds perception which then is challenged and recast by the unfolding events, not just within the text but within the reader as well.

5. What techniques do you use to create believable dialogue?

I really like writing dialogue, and I tend to think of building up an exchange in a few layers:

Verbal Habits: is your character a rambler (Sokka)? Blunt and terse (Zuko)? Always trying to poke fun (Toph)? Those verbal habits help build out the conversational voice of each character, and are often rooted in their characterization

Recognize Rhythm: Actual conversations tend to be a mixture of long and short sentences, exchanging listening and speaking, nonverbal as well as verbal cues. A hear-to-heart will have a different flow to it than shooting the shit after work.

Dialogue Isn't Perfect: People stutter and stumble, thoughts start and stop, there's cross-talk and interruptions, spoken word tends to be less formal than written word--building in those pauses and half-thoughts can help it feel more natural, and also show where a character is stumbling or struggling with a thought

Build Around the Words: layering in even simple action is a great way to make a piece of dialogue more engaging while also accomplishing some needed point A-to-point B or worldbuilding or exposition. Characters are also reacting to and thinking about what they're hearing, what they might say next, how it makes them feel.

Don't Forget Nonverbal Cues: Someone saying something with averted eyes and fidgeting hands suggests something very different than the exact same thing said with a direct gaze and squared shoulders. Body language makes the dialogue more rich.

Mix Up Your Sentence Structure: This is related to rhythm, but switch between using dialogue tags or not, put your internal aside at the front of a line of dialogue or the middle or the end, switch between long and short sentences. And do it all with a purpose--fewer dialogue tags and shorter lines of dialogue generally feel like a faster conversation, dialogue breaking in the middle tends to shift the emphasis of the sentence. Get a feel for the ways you can leverage your sentence structure itself to signal tone or pace or pauses!

For this Questions for Fic Writers asks game!

[flowerscarlethe]

☀️tease tidbit tuesday🌙

I've spent the last three weeks writting this au sort of thing and i like it a lot so i hope you all like it too!

...

[i've called this one «sunshine and moonlight:insomnia»]

...

Buck's snoring next to him and Eddie can't fall asleep. Funnily enough, the snoring is not the direct cause of his insomnia. Yes, it is loud and a little bit annoying —and he recalls Chris through the years often saying he couldn't sleep well because of it, bullying Buck till he's begging for forgiveness and understanding while shooting his adorable, sad puppy look at Eddie— but Eddie is used to it after so many nights hearing it just a few inches away from him. At this point, for Eddie the snoring it's nothing but a constant reminder that Buck is besides him pretty much alive and healthy, having some crazy dream he will share with him and their kid —'I'm almost nineteen years old, dad, come on!'— over some hotcakes in the morining. Eddie needs this, needs to know that Buck is right here, that he didn't stay dead after being struck by a lightening eight years ago, that he didn't die in a fire he recklessly ran into or drown in a fucking tsunami, crushed by a firetruck or asphyxiated by blood clots. It's soothing —Buck's presence, the peaceful heaving of his chest and his breath against the naked skin of Eddie's shoulder, the snores so close to his ear and the warmth his body radiates— and it's somehow frightening at the same time because he's terrified of how easy is to be with this man, to have him around, to lean on him; it terrifies him how easy is to love Buck, to be married to him and to raise Chris together and to have his back and– and how unbearable it would be to lose him, how broken and hopeless and sorrowful he would be. And that's why he can't fall asleep. Deeply-asleep-Buck seems to decide that's the perfect moment to take over the whole fucking blanket while shifting in bed, removing his right arm and leg off Eddie's chest and hip respectively, and letting his partner to freeze his ass off in this colder than usual december dawn. Eddie snorts, determined not to allow this betrayal, turns to his right side and ends up facing Buck's gorgeous, broad back full of scars —Eddie's got a fair amount of scars on his skin too. That's what being a firefighter for the last twelve years would do to you— and little freckles. He wants to kiss them, so he does while his left hand finds its way to Buck's belly. And maybe a bit lower, too. “Hey” says Buck a moment later, voice raspy and calmly spoken words. Eddie can almost see the gears of his brain starting to run very, very slowly. “What are you doing, exactly?” “My husband stole the blanket and I'm cold” Eddie answers in that famous irritating, snarky tone of his while still spreading kisses all over Buck's skin. He won't stop loving the fact that both of them are used to sleeping in their underwear anytime soon. “So I'm looking for an alternative way to get all my warmth back.” Buck chuckles and turns around, wrapping his body —and the blanket— on Eddie's again. Buck is twirling his beard between his fingers and pressing the softest, sweetest kisses on his face and Eddie can't not think that this is happiness, that this is the paradise everyone talk about. “You know what? I think i have some ideas to accomplish that mission of yours” Buck mutters, his lips on Eddie's and their legs interwined. They're right where they belong. “Of course you do.” And Eddie can admit that the sound of his husband's giggles is even better than his snoring.

...

I'll be bringing you some more context later this week ♡ thank for reading!

...

[no one tagged me to share this and i don't really know anyone i would be comfortable tagging. so maybe you could reblog or leave a comment if you want me to tag you next time!]

[minecraftbookshelf]

Mistakes Are Made Chapter One Dialogue Breakdown

This was hard to make it turns out. A combination of "how do i format this" and trying to comprehensively summarize the thought processes and decisions going on. I think this works though.

Honestly, this sort of thing would probably work a lot better as like, a live conversation but we work with what we've got XD

I won't be including every bit of dialogue from the chapter but it will be most of them.

Disclaimer that this isn't a "How To" or any kind of "you should do things this way" this is just an explanation of what I put into my writing, and dialogue specifically. Also that I write in limited first person most of the time, so in a way, all the narration can be considered dialogue and as examples of character voice.

This is also only the first part of a long story that is intended to a) be re-readable and b) involve a lot of discovery as the story progresses, so a lot of the decisions I made are based off of things that will come up/be revealed later in the series. I will be talking about those, sometimes with no helpful explanation, sorry XD

I'm using color coding to specify what parts I'm talking about at any given time, so hopefully that helps.

This is going to be a long, wordy post, its entire point is to be an insight into the intentionality and consideration that goes into writing dialogue for me, if this isn't something you're interested in, absolutely pass it by. It will also likely "take some of the magic out of it" for some people. But I like to think that it might also add a bit more magic to it for others. So here we go!

On with the show behind the scenes! [AO3 Link to the Chapter] if you want to follow along there with more context to the selections.

"Hello, Jimmy!" He manages to clamber out of the fountain without tripping and falling flat on his face at least. He splashes Katherine in the process, where she is hovering off to the side but he can't really be bothered to worry about that. All he can manage to do is stare at Sausage's smirking face. "Hello, Jimmy!" Katherine's greeting is much less mocking

Starting off with the very first dialogue of the chapter, which doesn't occur until a few paragraphs in and then proceeds to be the exact same line said by two different characters.

This is one of the times that I am heavily relying on the fact that I am writing fanfiction and these greetings are words that we hear the characters in question (Sausage and Katherine) say multiple times. So I don't go into much detail with dialogue tags, counting on the reader to fill that in themselves. Even if they/you aren't imagining the exact tones I had in mind its a fairly easy extrapolation that these are said in wildly different tones. The emphasis on Sausage's is to imply the more mocking/antagonistic tone, helped along by the mention of his expression, but can also just convey that its louder and more emotive (As Katherine is trying very hard to be OfficialTM in this chapter) Also describing her greeting as "less mocking" helps fill in the appropriate tone for Sausages retroactively.

"What is he doing here?" He jerks his chin at Sausage, who is still giggling like a child. He sees Jimmy looking and grins at him, all teeth. Behind the mask, Jimmy bares his own teeth and takes some comfort in the knowledge that he has more of them; and they are sharper.

This is the first instance of Jimmy's inhuman body language being used as an extension of the dialogue/conversation between the characters. The use of teeth as a threat being a hybrid trait.

Sausage's smile is also part of this, something that isn't actually said in this chapter but will be demonstrated later on is that, as the ruler of a kingdom with a heavy hybrid population, Sausage knows this and his own body language is chosen accordingly.

Sausage keeps giggling and Jimmy can barely hear it beneath the roar in his ears. He leans down to try and whisper into the faerie queen's ear. "I really need your alliance right now, Katherine." He hopes his desperation doesn't show in his voice. She gives him a reproving look that throws him right back to his brief time spent in a classroom. "I'm allied with everyone, Jimmy. You know that."

This is the first example of really incorporating distinct character voices into the dialogue. I'm a liberal user of italics and in this case I'm using them to indicate emphasis where the ccs tend to stress their words to encourage assigning that voice to the dialogue itself. These are also, if not direct quotes from canon, very similar to actual things the ccs and their cubitos have said so it isn't exactly what I would consider heavy lifting.

Jimmy at this point is still fully informal. He's surprised and he's talking privately to a friend.

This is also more natural dialogue from Katherine, whose exasperation with her friend is partly overcoming her attempts to be Formal Faerie Queen.

I'm trying to keep the early dialogue fairly simple and close to canon voices because that way I can transition slowly and naturally into slightly different voices that suit the atmosphere while also preserving their more casual voices as the way that they talk when they are more comfortable and in less official settings. Setting up the contexts for different manners of speech is a big thing in this chapter overall.

"He invaded the Swamp," Jimmy hisses, his ear-fins flaring, ignoring the shudder down his spine from her use of his Name, even in part. "He crossed our borders. Again. He's threatened war." He's no longer whispering by the end, standing to his full height, shoulders back, sword hand by his shoulder. "And according to him, you've threatened it right back!"

Another instance of emphasis on Jimmy's inhuman body language.

This bit is actually more about Katherine than Jimmy. It does show a bit of Jimmy's sensitivity to magic but more than that, it incorporates Katherine's willingness to invoke her own flavor of threats, even in casual conversation with friends.

This is the first real deviation from canon dialogue in the entire chapter. This is the blending point where I'm taking the characters voices and using them myself instead of just channeling the pre-existing ones. The emphasis for this was important to me to try and keep it Jimmy's voice saying the words.

The body language here is a physical representation of Jimmy's shift from more informal speech to a more tense and emotionally and politically fraught situation.It's also the transition of Jimmy taking this from a private conversation to a more public one, now in earshot of both Sausage and Katherine's guards and staff. He's beginning to speak more as The Codfather than Jimmy and his physical stance is the biggest indication of that.

This is Katherine's last "private conversation" line and is, again, indicative of her frustration with her friends and the situation they have put themselves and everyone else in. It's a fairly sharp statement, geared to indicate that she is not really on Jimmy's side here. ("all sides" = "no sides" and a part of Katherine knows that, even if she refuses to admit it out loud, mostly because it is a role she has trapped herself in and can't leave.)

Sausage recovers quickly and shakes out the fur lining of his coat. "Is it just me or does it smell fishy in here, now?" "Sausage," Katherine looks disapprovingly back over her shoulder. "That's rude." "Oh," Sausage blinks at them both, "I'm sorry, Jimmy, I didn't realize."

Jumping ahead a bit we're in the "polite conversation because political masks" phase of dialogue.

Sausage is Not Being Polite. This is his attempt at "polite rudeness" but he's not very subtle in general so its blatant enough for Katherine to call him out on it. It's also a continuation of Sausage speaking more informally in general. He has something of an upper hand in the situation, and an abundance of bravado, and that is reflected in the way he talks. (Sausage just also has a very distinct voice in general that is already leant towards melodrama which works very well for the au's setting as a whole)

His apology is also disingenuous. In retrospect I should have probably used some italics or some other indicator to help convey that. (I might go back and edit something in. I do that sometimes on AO3. Major edits get notes made at the chapter end but minor fixes happen a lot.) He makes the "apology" and that connects Jimmy to his original statement, even if it hadn't been blatantly obvious.

"Oh, this one is new!" Sausage immediately changes the subject, pointing at one of the skulls hanging on the wall of the hall. It's some kind of middling-sized land animal...a sheep maybe? with poppies filling the eye sockets and woven in a crown, there are delicate lines of gold painted across the surface of the bleached bone. Katherine beams, her irritation at the rudeness forgotten (or at least set aside, fae never truly forget breaches of etiquette) "It is! It's a gift from a childhood friend," she looks fondly upon the skull for a moment. "We've been reconnecting lately." Sausage nods sagely, "It is always good to spend time with your friends." "It is," Katherine's ears twitch and her wings flutter briefly before she resumes walking. "Which is why we are going to fix this."

This is a slightly better attempt from Sausage at maintaining political etiquette by complimenting the host. A distraction and a peace offering.

And this is the first mention of Scott in the chapter, in what I am now realizing (it was not intended that way but here we go) is a context that kind of foreshadows his role of peace offering. It also is an establishing line for Katherine and Scott's relationship, as well as a nod to their short-lived plushie business (my beloved) from canon.(And the adaptation of it that exists in the au, which will come up later in Katherine's backstory at the very least.)

Sausage is being ingratiating here. It's a kind of wink wink nudge nudge "we should be friends and you should do what I want" moment.

Katherine knows what he is doing. This is also an incorporation of Katherine's inhuman characteristics, though a bit more subtly, specifically because this is Jimmy's pov and he is neither familiar enough with her mannerisms to break down exactly what they mean the way his own are, or unfamiliar enough with them to register them as odd and worth commenting on.

And then we have the POV switch to Xornoth

The entirety of Xornoth's external, out-loud dialogue is one single line, but the internal dialogue is their narration of the situation at hand. Ft. "helpful" commentary from Exor.

Xornoth's voice is arguably the trickiest part of the entire chapter as it is the part with the least canon basis. Xornoth is a character I am functionally building from scratch, given that the majority of their canon appearances are arguably as much Exor as they are Xornoth. (at least in the context of this AU)

Xornoth's canon voice (on a purely literal level) is "Scott Smajor with a script and a voice changer" and, on the occasions they are on screen together, "someone else with a script and a voice changer", and then the single epilogue bit.

So I'm working with somewhat stilted, formal speech and a tendency for dramatic declarations.

For this first chapter there was actually a bit more effort put into characterizing Exor, as, despite it being in their pov, the majority of the Xornoth characterization is happening in Chapter Two. (which is also mostly from their pov)

Honestly, this is already really long, I'll probably do the dialogue in the second part of the chapter as a part two, but I do want to put a compilation of Exor's commentary down here to talk about.

I opted to make Exor's dialogue bold instead of italics both to distinguish it from Xornoth's own internal dialogue and to emphasize how unavoidable it is for Xornoth. It's not something they can truly ignore, its too loud in their head.

Meaningless frivolity.

Disparaging commentary on the priorities of the other emperors and Jimmy in particular, leaning into one that Xornoth themself is inclined to agree with.

Do not pretend such reluctance. I see the truth.

Denying Xornoth's knowledge of themself in favor of asserting their own.

You are still only a student. And you will be so long as you refuse to take what is rightfully ours.

Exor's goal is and always has been (as long as Xornoth as known them) world domination. This is his most blatant statement of it, coupled with a disparaging comment towards Xornoth's own authority.

Like a fish on a hook.

Dehumanization with a side of violent imagery.

They are going to hurt themselves, trying that hard to utilize what little intelligence they have.

General scorn towards the intelligence and competence of the other emperors.

If we pinned her wings to the wall like a butterfly and made her watch, that would phase her. If we gutted him like a fish he'd squeal so nicely.

Violence. Rather graphic, worded in a way to make Xornoth/The Reader paint a stronger visual image to accompany it. These are the ones that both Exor (in-story) and I (out of story) designed to have a stronger impact. For Exor its about sowing thoughts in Xornoth's mind and having them doubt themself, for me its about really conveying Exor's intentions.

Rip them all to pieces, give the farmer the fight she wants.

This is a half-step back into a more friendly-aligned bit. Pearl is Xornoth's friend. A war would make her happy! Pearl is not Xornoth's biggest weakness, but she is one and Exor takes as much advantage of that as he can.

Wheat fields burn so easily, all it would take is a single spark in the right place and all of Mythland would be in flames. Carefully, carefully, Xornoth sets their book down on the table beside them and places their hands in their lap. Katherine will stop allowing them to borrow her books if they start spontaneously combusting them. Hopefully she doesn't notice the slightly singed cover.

Arson yay!

With the previous comments designed to rile Xornoth up the invocation of fire is a deliberate reference on my part to Xornoth's powers (with the follow up in the next paragraph) and on Exor's part is a provocation towards losing control/making it harder to stay in control of their powers.

Why do you consistently choose to prove your incompetence.

Even gods that crave violence can be disappointed.

this was equal parts chosen to add to the overall comedy of that exact moment and as a final nod to the way that, while he spends a lot of time tearing down other people in Xornoth's head, he also puts a lot of time into tearing down Xornoth themself.

-

I'm going to leave it there for now, if just because of length. I can come back and make a part two for Xornoth and the other emperors during the second part of the chapter later.