#totally unpredictable and upsetting. ugh

[kimmkitsuragi]

i hate drawing plans literally die. build the things by vibes idc

[hawkwhore]

Rebound - Hawk X Female!Reader

taking place some time after his breakup with moon, (probably end of S3 era after his redemption) he starts to develop feelings for y/n, but he isn’t sure if he’s ready for another relationship after what happened with moon. this results in constant disguised flirting to avoid commitment, leaving y/n confused on if he likes her, or is just joking around.

p.s. thank you guys so much for 100 followers!! :) i decided that im gonna make a hawk imagine as a thank you since i’ve been thinking about doing it for awhile. im so scared to post this bye.

words; 2,444

includes; light swearing, angst, fluff

It had gotten to a point, that it was almost bothersome. Bothersome, the way he would talk to you, and pretend like it was nothing.

“Hey gorgeous,” he greeted you as you sat down at Hawk’s lunch table. Your friends smirked and you rolled your eyes, trying to repress a smile. He did this all too often, making comments that shouldn’t be made unless it meant something more.

“Hi.” You sat down awkwardly, never knowing how to respond to his uncomfortable remarks. Not that you exactly minded them, you’d be lying if you said you didn’t have a bit of a thing for Hawk. But what you didn’t like, however, was not being able to tell if his comments were serious, or just another way to amuse himself over your reactions.

“So, we were just talking about the next All Valley. You’re coming to watch, right?” Hawk asked you as he bit into his food. You were never really into actually taking these karate classes, but you were a supportive friend to the group and always came to watch them fight. “Yeah, of course.”

“I still think you should join the dojo and fight with us, Y/N.” Miguel said hopefully and you smiled at him, preparing to reject the idea again. “Yeah, plus, you’d look pretty hot in the uniform, right guys?” Hawk joked, looking to the table for agreement. You let out a sigh of disappointment at the comment, laughing it off as the rest of the group agreed.

“Yeah, not happening.” You said while grinning, shutting the idea down for the millionth time. Hawk frowned. “You’re lame.” He stuck out a finger from behind the sandwich he was holding to point a finger at you. “Oh well. Looks like you guys will have to find another way to spend more time with me.” You joked, and gave a shrug of your shoulders to your friends.

You had thought, this would have been a good opening for Hawk to say something like ‘You’re right, do you wanna go out with me this weekend?’ but of course, he didn’t say that. He didn’t say anything, really. The conversation just went on.

It made no sense to you why he acted the way he did, but never made a move. It was truly infuriating at times. Eventually the bell rang, and you all parted for the second half of your classes. You wouldn’t see Hawk again until your last period, which was both upsetting and a relief for you at the same time. He’s just so unpredictable.

There had even been times you’d called him out on his behavior, like when you all went out to Golf N’ Stuff and he practically acted like you two were a couple the whole night. He was complimenting you, putting his arm around you, and it prompted you to quite literally say, ‘If you actually like me that much why haven’t you asked me out?’ In a taunting tone towards him, wanting to see what he’d do.

For the first time in a long time, he’d seemed intimidated. He retracted his arm from you even, and after a moment’s silence regained his usual composure to spout a “You wish,” and laugh it off. It hurt your feelings a little, honestly. Was he just using you for the comfort without the obligation? Could it have easily been anyone else besides you? You were determined to find out, but you’ve just been stuck playing the long game.

It was later that day when you reached your final class that more unsurprising events from Hawk occurred. You had been sitting in the general center area of the classroom when Hawk walked in, and he shot a wink your way as he took his usual seat behind you.

“Hey,” he greeted. You turned around to face him, noticing once again how cute he looked in his red hoodie that you wish was yours, and replied nonchalantly. “Hey, how was bio?” You asked him. The teacher wasn’t here yet, so you were thankfully able to converse without being yelled at.

“It was wild,” he started, and his eyes lit up while his mouth curled into a devious smile. “We actually dissected some shit today. Just completely ripped the frog’s guts apart.” He spoke, feeling accomplished. “Totally badass.”

You mimicked the way a person would vomit, exclaiming how disgusting that story was. “And that is exactly why I am not taking biology.” You said while giggling.

He rolled his eyes playfully, but watched you intently as you laughed. He didn’t say anything at first, just smiled softly. “I love your laugh, it’s so cute.” There it is. Except this time it seemed a little more sincere than a harmless flirtation. Too bad that you know that’s all it really is, though.

You furrowed your eyebrows at him in a confused look at his compliment like you always do, and turned back to the front of the class when you realized the teacher had just arrived.

It can’t be that he’s scared to ask you out in some sort of fear of rejection, because you’ve made it pretty clear how you feel many times before. When it first started, you tried to reciprocate the things he did and said. But every time you tried, he brushed you off and made you feel like he didn’t want that. So, what, he could flirt with you, but you couldn’t flirt with him? How is that fair?

You considered these thoughts throughout class, and it was starting to frustrate you. Seriously, how is that fair?

You had become so focused on these thoughts, in fact, that you didn’t notice when the teacher had called on you. “Y/N,” Hawk shook your arm from behind you trying to get your attention back onto the class, and you whipped your head up. “Yeah, sorry.”

When class was over and you headed out of the room, Hawk was close to follow behind and pull you to the side before you got too far. “Hey are we still on for tonight?” He asked confidently, referring to your plan to watch the new WandaVision episode together at his house after school. You would’ve been nervous about this, but luckily Demetri was coming, so it shouldn’t be too awful.

“Yeah, duh,” you said while walking towards the exit with him. When you reached his car, you looked around. “Where’s Demetri?” You questioned, as Hawk started getting in the drivers’ seat. “He didn’t tell you he wasn’t coming?” He said boredly. Suddenly you felt tense, but you masked that with a look of annoyance. Figures.

“Ugh, what? No? He’s annoying. Why not?” You complained as you got in the car, no longer waiting for Demetri to show up. “Family dinner, I think?” He responded, while you buckled in your seatbelt and checked your makeup in the little mirror.

“Okay, well, his loss I guess.” You tried to hide your anxiousness about the fact you two were now going to be alone together at his house, with continued annoyance about Demetri’s cancellation.

“Yeah definitely, what loser would pass up an entire hour of sitting next to you?” He commented smugly, trying to lighten the mood. “Half-hour.” You corrected, turning your head away and ignoring the flirtatious intention of the comment.

You shook off the unexpected change of plan and suggested some music, to which Hawk agreed. You both terribly sang along to a few songs while chatting about WandaVision theories until you got to his house, and went inside.

“So what was that in class today?” As you two were walking upstairs to his room, he asked you this almost through a bit of laughter. “What do you mean?” You looked for clarification, hoping he didn’t mean what you thought he did. “You never lose focus in class.” He confirmed.

“Yeah I don’t know! Just zoned out I guess.” You tried to explain without giving him the details on the thoughts that caused your zoning out, thankful for not having to be in direct eye contact with him as you answered while walking inside his room.

Unfortunately, this answer was not good enough for Hawk. “Bullshit! What were you thinking about?” He encouraged lightheartedly, assuming this topic of conversation wouldn’t be anything deep. How wrong he was.

You sat down on his bed and he did the same, and you tried to think of what to say next. At your silence he continued, “You were probably thinking about how hot I am, huh?” You lightly smacked his arm and let out a breath of defeat.

“I don’t wanna kill the vibe by talking about this. I just wanna see Evan Peters in the next episode.” You tried changing the topic by making a joke, but he didn’t budge.

“Dude, what is it? Seriously you can talk to me.” He looked at you sincerely and moved a little closer, detecting this might be more serious than he thought. As annoyed as you were that he wouldn’t give this up, your heart melted a bit at this action.

Then, that heart started beating incredibly fast when you realized what you were now going to have to admit to him. It’s fine, you told yourself, you’ve been wanting to get this off your chest for ages, so just do it.

“Do you like me?” You blurted out.

That is not how you intended to start this conversation at all.

The smirk that was always planted on Hawk’s face immediately fell, and he suddenly looked nervous. “What?” He asked, trying to avoid answering.

Lucky for him, you had more to say.

“All you do, every time I see you, is make flirtatious comments towards me, and it’s weird. It wouldn’t be weird if you actually meant them, but you had plenty of chances to act on it and you haven’t, so at this point I’m wondering if you’re just using me as some sort of fun rebound to mess with and you don’t even like me at all, especially since whenever I tried to flirt back you brushed it off and acted like I was an idiot for doing that, so if you don’t actually like me I’d appreciate if you stopped doing what you’re doing because it’s confusing and I don’t know how to act around you anymore.”

You hesitated for a moment after your very passionate speech, and finished with, “That.. is what I was thinking about during class.”

You looked up at him anxiously and saw an expression of hurt and guilt on his face, and he gulped harshly at the realization that it was his turn to talk.

“You’re not a rebound.” He spoke softly, avoiding eye contact, almost reverting back to his Eli persona. You felt a glimpse of hope at this, but waited for him to continue, fidgeting with the ends of your shirt’s sleeves in impatience.

“And I’m sorry I made you feel like that was even a possibility.” He said louder, slowly regaining his confidence in his words. “I’ve been nervous, after Moon, about getting into another relationship.” He admitted to you, finally looking into your eyes.

Now that he wasn’t as nervous anymore to explain himself, suddenly you were. Where was this going?

“I didn’t want to commit to anything, I was..” He took a breath, as if ashamed to say it, “Scared.” He looked down, avoiding your gaze again, but continued. “I just didn’t want to screw up the same way I did before, and grow a relationship like that just for it to end so soon.”

“So you thought you’d just flirt with whoever was around to compensate your need for love?” You interrupted harshly. You felt a little bad, but you were still angry, and insecure.. and it still sounded like a rebound.

But all your thoughts of self-doubt went out the window when he took your hands in his. “No!” Hawk said, almost shouting in disbelief at you. “I like you a lot, Y/N. I just didn’t know what to do about it. I didn’t want to make things serious and get hurt again, or even worse I do something stupid and hurt you. But I guess my attempt at ‘liking you from a distance’—“ He put emphasis on those words, as though making fun of his own phrasing. “—ended up being stupid and hurt you anyways. And I’m really sorry for that.”

Hawk poured his heart out to you, and you were in shock. You don’t think you’d ever seen him so vulnerable before. You couldn’t think of anything else to say, so you did something you thought you’d never do.

You kissed him.

His short look of confusion as you leaned in quickly faded when he realized, and he happily accepted the kiss. He moved his hand to hold your face, his other one on your waist, and you lightly rested your hands on his chest. A sense of relief washed over you, finally understanding what was going through his head all this time. Before the kiss could deepen, you parted from him to say something.

“I understand,” You moved your arms up a little, wrapping them around his neck while talking, and he held your waist loosely. “But I hope you know that we don’t have to be like you and Moon. You’ve changed so much since then. And I believe in us. I want to be with you.”

You stared into his eyes intensely, hoping he would say exactly what you’ve been wanting him to say to you for months.

His puppy dog expression broke into a huge smile, and he nodded. “Yeah, I want to be with you too.” He leaned in again, much more confidently this time, and kissed you deeply.

He kept his hold on your waist tight, and your lips continued to move together as your hands grasped onto the back of his neck. He leaned forwards slightly and moved his hand to hold your jaw, but accidentally broke the kiss from a smile he couldn’t manage to suppress.

You giggled at this, giving him another quick peck on the lips before turning yourself towards the TV. “So, WandaVision?” You reminded him, laughing to yourself a bit at how things escalated.

“Oh, right,” Hawk hesitated, looking at you for another second. “Fine.” He gave up the idea of kissing you more, and searched for the remote.

“I guess we should be glad Demetri didn’t come after all.” Hawk smiled slyly as he picked up the remote, and cuddled up next to you on the bed.

You laughed, and curled up close to him as he turned on the show. “Yeah, definitely.”

———————————————————————

ok hi i hope this wasn’t terrible i’ve basically never written a fanfic before but if y’all liked it you can send me requests??

also random thought i got uncomfy just writing them kissing even though i read intensely nsfw fanfics on the daily so idk why that happened but anyways. LMFAOOO

bye thank u for 100 followers excuse me while i hibernate because this post is embarrassing

[infernwetrust]

AHS 1984: Between The Lines [Xavier Plympton x Chet Clancy] 2. Upset Me

PART 1

Summary: A world before the horror. A world with some horrors. A fantasy world, where things are slightly normal. A world where Chet Clancy has been in a relationship with his long term girlfriend, Brooke Thompson. A world where Xavier Plympton, struggles to find himself after a dark past. But what if I told you that's not all who Chet is romantically involved with? What if I told you there’s a little bit more to Xavier than what he presents himself to be? What if I told you to read between the lines? Together we'll explore friendship, love, deceit, and sexuality on a different level.

Rated: R for Restricted. 18+ Very Mature Themes.

Warnings: Alright folks, I’m going to be very honest with you. This book can get dark and depressing sometimes. Due to it’s unpredictable nature, since it is a work in progress, read at your own discretion, and apply tags as you see them fit. I will be giving warnings at the beginning of chapters that do take it to that level. If you do choose to read and you come across anything that makes you uncomfortable, please don’t hesitate to reach out to me. I am all ears.

WC: 1.4k

"Did anyone remember to grab joint papers?" Chet asked. "I used my last one outside." A now, shirtless Chet, stood at the top of the stairs. He combed out his hair and was wearing a gold chain. His eyes scanned his rather large living room where his friends had spread out to their comfort. Except not really. Brooke had no problem laying against Xavier's side, his arm in the back of the sofa,while he was having a conversation with Ray.  

Xavier paused his sentence to turn his attention towards Chet who was now at the bottom of the steps. He couldn't help, but to glance over him one good time.. or twice.

"Montana said that she would bring hers if she remembered to, so we're just waiting on her." he spoke. "What's the rush? I'm sure you and Brooke here are high out of the ass."  

"And wouldn't you love to be too?"

"Why is that even a question?"

"Why do you ask so many questions?"

"Please don't start this." Brooke interjected. "I've dealt with your bromance long enough in high school."

"Seriously." Ray added on. "When are you two not going at each other's throats. And it's always for something stupid. And to top it off you start talking again like it never even happened."

"Total bullshit." Xavier directed towards Ray.

"Yeah what he said." Chet chimed in, lifting Brooke's legs up to sit down. He gently placed them on his lap and smiled at her before throwing his arm around the sofa, just a little higher than Xavier's.  

"You two argue like an old couple. It's kind of cute actually." Brooke spoke again. "Chet you should see your face when X mentions anything about sports."

"Because I know that he's only saying it to make me mad. I've known this kid since we were toddlers and he has never had interest in sports."

"False." Xavier interjected.

"Oh did I mention he thinks aerobics are a type of sport, when it's a type of exercise?"

"You're joking right?" Ray asked Xavier. Xavier stayed silent, avoiding eye contact with every single person in the room. Chet stared him down like a dog with a heavy smirk on his face.

"Go on." Chet said, slapping the back of Xavier's arm.

"Jesus Christ,  he's not joking."

"I hate you. You disgust me. And I hope you choke on the beer you decide to drink tonight." Xavier said to Chet, getting up without warning Brooke who's head was now where he once sat.

"A warning would of been nice."'she mumbled.

"Where are you going?" Chet asked trying to hold back his laugh. He was ignored as Xavier headed for the door, taking out a box cigarettes from his pocket.  

"You done did it now." Ray said to Chet.

"Oh fuck me..." Chet sighed, throwing his head back. "Xavier I didn't-,"

The door was already slammed shut.

"Fuck." Chet quickly got up, again, giving Brooke no warning, hustling out the door behind Xavier. He stood at the bottom of the porch steps, hand in his pocket, puffing on his cigarette. He looked over his shoulder slightly at Chet, who ran his hand through his hair.

"Xavi." he called out.

"You know, Clancy." Xavier spoke. "You don't do well at keeping your mouth shut."

"And neither do you." Chet joined him at the bottom of the steps and the two sat down. Xavier took another pull before passing the cigarette to Chet who gladly accepted. "A little nicotine never hurt anyone right?"

"A little nicotine?" Xavier jokingly asked, looking at Chet and grinning. "I wish, Chet. I've been smoking since I was 12. I'm so fucked up." He sighed, putting his head between his knees.

"Just smoke more weed."

"I can't afford to keep being high all the time."

"Bullshit. You want to be a big time actor. You can more than afford to keep being high all the time."

"Not on set. In a couple years that stuff is going to ruin your memory. I promise."

"You get on my nerves. Always trying to be so good, innocent, and pure. Always trying to spit some words of knowledge."  Chet punched him in the side of the arm. "But if you want to keep that pretty face of yours, you need to stop smoking cigarettes or at least try cutting back."

"This is coming from the guy that's done coke twice now."

"How did this become about me?" The two looked at each other and started laughing. "But, listen. I'm sorry. You told me not to tell anyone about that and I did. You can tell everyone about the time I pissed my pants in public."

"No." Xavier responded, softly. "I'm not going to do that. It's not the worst thing you know about me." Chet had to go way back into the memories he had with Xavier. He had too many. And then he remembered.

"Ooo, yeah. Let's not ever talk about that one."

"Ever."

Chet handed him back his cigarette for him to finish up, but instead of finishing it, he simply flicked it into the grass. Xavier cared about his face too much to finish it. This one at least.  He looked at Chet, who was now staring now at his hands, playing with his finger nails. He admired everything about him. From his hair, to his eyes, to his lips, and everything below. Xavier didn't want to admit this, but he liked Chet. He knew how fragile Chet's masculinity was, so he made sure to never push those buttons when he made his sexual jokes around his friends. A flirt, he was, but Chet made him feel small despite the small height difference.  

"Are we moving the party outside?" a well dressed Montana asked as she stood behind the gate, chewing her gum aggressively.

"It's about time you showed up."  Chet said. "I've been sobering up and I don't like it. Did you bring those papers?"

"Well it's nice to see you too, Chet." she responded, blowing a bubble. She stared her ex up and down. "Xavier."

"Demon that haunts my dreams." Xavier responded, rolling his eyes.

"You miss me."

"I hate you."

"You want to fuck me."

"I want to choke you."

"Are you guys dialogue fucking right now? I can feel the sexual tension in the air." Chet spoke.

"I rather die."  

"That's funny, Xavier. I swear you were moaning my name last week at your party."

"That was you two?!" Chet's jaw dropped. "I was wondering where you went Xavier. Anyone that stood at the bottom of the stairs could hear you guys. See I knew there was still some love there."

"Oh please. I was drunk, high, and horny and so was she. It was a mistake."

"Then why did you kiss me yesterday when I came to give you back your flannel that you haven't stopped bugging me about?"

"Fuck off, Montana." Xavier got up swiftly, eyeing her down.

"Make me."

"Okaaaay. I think I'm gonna go back inside." Chet said, also getting up. "When you two are done lusting, I hope you'll join us and not go fuck in the woods somewhere."

Xavier and Montana stared each other down as Chet made his way back inside and as soon as they heard that door slam they went after each other.

"Why are you such a bitch?" he asked her.

"Ugh. Why are you?" she asked back. "You get fucked up, coming knocking on my door or calling my house. You tell me you love me, fuck me senseless, and then you leave and start acting like this. And I thought I was the moody one in the group."

Xavier hung his head low for the second time tonight, laughing quietly to himself.

"And you're just going to leave out the part where you do the same? Where you show up to my door, crying over me? Where you literally beg me to fuck you all the time and get livid when I say no? Right. Montana, please go fuck yourself."

"You already do that."

"Yeah, not anymore." He turned around to head back in the house.

"You won't last. You miss me too much."

"I'll hope for the day when you're not so full of yourself, sweety."

"Coming from the guy who thinks his face is worth billions of dollars."

"I'm gonna pretend like you didn't just say that. Now come on, let's go inside."

Toxic. But we'll examine that next chapter.

[arolla-pine]

Fake Dating - p.15

(15) - A thin line

He had been in love! Marinette couldn’t forget about it for the rest of the day. Even in the evening, after coming back home she was thinking about this discovery so intensively that she barely fell asleep. She still remembered it in the morning when she was preparing for the third day with Adrien.

Yesterday in the maze he had asked her similar questions that she had asked him before. And she had to run back and forth, because her answers mostly were incorrect. Finally, he sent her those two last questions, which she’d left for the end as well. When she in her naivete went to the left, she was wrong in both cases.

He had had someone. He had been in love once. And that someone confessed their love to him. So, why Adrien needed all this mystification if he had a beloved one? She was sure only about one thing – it wasn’t Nino. Apparently, she was missing some information…

Why was she so moved by discovering a secret of his heart? He was almost a stranger for her! The news shouldn’t spoil her day!

Even worse, she was aware that Adrien had noticed a change of her mood and became worried and sad. Was he afraid that she could take their fake dating too seriously? If so, she had to convince him at all costs that there was nothing to worry about! Even if it meant pretending for the whole day. Because that was the truth – she had to pretend that… Ugh! That wasn’t a part of the plan! When and how had it happened?!

She sighed in defeat, leaving these sorrows behind. She went out to meet Adrien, who – as usual was waiting for her, leaning against the car. He still looked concerned, as yesterday. That helped Marinette to recover composure. She had to dance to their tune.

“So, where we’re going today?” she asked light-hearted.

Adrien glanced at her in surprise.

“Uhm…” he hesitated, but finished after a while: “Fontainebleau.”

“Really?” she exclaimed, and this time she was excited for real, forgetting about her yesterday dilemmas.

“This time we’re going to visit the palace.”

“Oh, I’ve thought you’re taking me to the forest!” she joked, but avoided his sight.

“Not today. Nino said that he had enough all that walking in the nature.”

“Yeah…” his friend confirmed, as only he got out the car. “All those games in mazes were too much for me. One more and I’ll let you get lost for real.”

“But seriously…” Adrien continued, and Nino just rolled his eyes meaningfully. “I think that we’ve got quite a lot of details for our story, so we can have some fun now.”

“I’m in!” Marinette smiled to herself. She knew that in the palace they wouldn’t have time to talk about that change of her mood yesterday.

She didn’t wait for her fake boyfriend to open her the door – just got inside quickly with a hope he didn’t notice she wanted to avoid his touch or look into his eyes.

Adrien didn’t even tried to catch her anyway. He had got so mixed messages from her that he needed a moment to understand what had just happened here. He felt that Marinette’s ease was fake. On the other hand he had an impression that she’d been honestly excited to visit Fontainebleau. Well, girls could be so complicated!

He sighed heavily and got in the car. Although he was sitting next to Marinette, he felt as if a glass wall appeared between them. There was no option that he could take her hand like yesterday.

The drive through the city was like a nightmare. There was a perfect silence in the car, and the tension could be cut with a knife. Nino looked from time to time at the rear-view mirror just to notice Adrien’s glances at Marinette, who kept staring outside the window and not saying a word. What the heck had happened in that maze? He had been with them for the whole time and didn’t see anything alarming. They were writing messages to each other and running back and forth. Happy like children.

Suddenly they became quiet and gloomy, and nothing changed so far.

The silence in the car was more and more unbearable. Nino realised that if he had to spend the next hour like that, he would prefer to kill himself instantly. He decided to act unconventionally, so he turned in the direction of the nearest petrol station.

“Nino?” Adrien asked suspiciously.

“I’ll refuel the car.” His friend muttered. “You’re both unpredictable, so I have to be prepared.”

After those words he got out the car.

Marinette glanced at Adrien sideways, but when she met his eyes, she immediately looked away. Soon after Nino’s head reappeared in the car.

“By the way, do you want anything to drink? Coffee? Er… Tea, maybe?”

Marinette felt uncomfortable. Adrien had to tell him the story about her argument with Plagg.

“Latte, if that’s not a problem…” she whispered.

“Double espresso.” Her partner added.

“Great. I’ll be right back.”

“Do you need help?” Adrien asked quickly.

“I’ll manage.” Nino replied and before he shut the door, he said: “Be good!”

Yesterday they would have probably laughed, but today the joke wasn’t funny for neither of them. Marinette even became more upset. She glanced at Adrien, wondering why he didn’t want to stay with her alone.

“You told him, didn’t you?” she asked finally.

“Ab-About wh-what?” he stuttered embarrassed.

“About tea.”

“Tea?” he repeated in astonishment, feeling a relief that she hadn’t asked about something else.

“You know… That I drink tea.” she muttered, still avoiding his gaze.

“Oh, no, I didn’t tell him that. Plagg told him.”

“He must have had fun…” she commented with a hint of regret, because she realised that she probably had made a fool of herself that day.

“Why?” Adrien was surprised, then discovered what was between the lines. – Plagg spoke very highly of you. I’d say that you impressed him then.

“I thought you were making fun of me.” she admitted reluctantly.

“Nino just wanted to be nice for you…” he whispered and risked taking her hand. He saw her looking down at their palms, but still not at him.

“All right.” she nodded.

“Can… Can we talk about it?” he asked uncertain.

“About what?”

“About what is bothering you.”

She didn’t answer immediately. Why had he asked her about that? She tried to pretend being cheerful and content, but it was getting harder and harder. She was close to break down and to start crying, confessing everything that was hidden deeply in her heart. No, she wasn’t allowed to do that. ‘It’s only fake dating’ – she had to remember about that. So, she had no choice but pretend till the end.

“No.” she finally replied and glanced at him.

She knew instantly that it was a wrong answer. She didn’t have to see that frown on his face, as if she hurt him by her refusal. He released her hand and was about to withdraw, when she grabbed his palm and squeezed it, saying:

“It’s about… I have to… No, I should put some things in order, you know?”

“Did I offend you somehow yesterday?” he asked carefully.

“What?” she was surprised. “How did you get that way?”

“I feel that something changed after our game in the maze.”

“No, Adrien. You didn’t offend me. I had great time, in fact.” she admitted and added quietly: “Even too great sometimes…”

“I had great time too, Mari.”

“Don’t you think that it’s a very thin line between the fake and the real things?” she asked suddenly, totally thoughtful, so she missed out his amazed look. “I’ve got lost a bit in all that…”

“I know that feeling. But you know what? I discovered something that could help you to solve that problem…” he smiled at her and gave her a wink, because he couldn’t help being happy that she had shared her worries. And they weren’t the kind he was afraid they could be.

“Well?” she finally looked at him.

“Just remember that we start our fake dating tomorrow, not earlier.” He said smiling at her, and she answered with a smile immediately.

“Someone ordered coffee?” Nino interrupted suddenly, putting his two cups inside the car.

Adrien and Marinette broke their fascinated gaze and looked at their driver a bit dizzy. They reached for their coffee unconsciously, exchanging meaningful smiles by the way. Nino rolled his eyes as he turned away. He had a feeling that Plagg’s perfect plan will fail even today…

––

Fake Dating p.14  <-  Previous part  |  Next part  ->  Fake Dating p.16 

Start reading from the beginning

[fanfic-scribbles]

Lunch Buddy: Chapter Fourteen

Masterlist

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Overall Story Facts:

Fandom: MCU Captain America/Avengers

Story Summary: Steve Rogers makes a friend. A prickly, generally people-averse friend, but they’ll both take what they can get.

Quick Facts: Friendship (/Eventual Romance) – Steve Rogers & Reader (leading to Steve Rogers/Reader) – Female Reader

Story Warnings: Reader-insert that verges on OFC, written in 1st person past tense

Chapter 14: Thankful

Chapter Summary: Steve spends the holiday with his grumpy friend. His grumpy friend realizes something.

Chapter Word Count: 2867

AN: ‘Why does this start at Halloween and end around Thanksgiving’ well unfortunately Thanksgiving was when I always imagined a certain part taking place and I don’t want to stretch this out for another two months. It feels right to have this here, chapter-wise. So without further ado… (ノ✧ ω ✧)ノ*✲ﾟ*

    “Wow.”

“Huh.” Steve put his controller down and changed the channel . “I thought you’d be more upset.”

“You wrecked me in the most convoluted way possible,” I said. “I can’t be mad. That was stupid impressive.”

“Thanks,” he said and sat back. “And thanks again for saving me from Tony’s costume party.”

“I didn’t save you; I just invited you to my party first.”

Steve looked around the room. “Do two people count as a party?”

“I’m sorry; where can I find the requirements to call something a party? Are they online? Maybe there’s a National Party Registry where I can–”

Steve shoved some popcorn at my face and I smacked him away, but I still had to dig some of it out of my shirt. Steve was, at least, decent enough to get the ones off the floor.

“Point being– there’s food, there’s fun, and if you don’t like it you can go and I will party by myself,” I said and turned my nose up at him.

“Touchy,” Steve chuckled and ate the pieces he had dropped. Well, the floor was clean enough. He added, “I am having fun though. Thank you.”

“Hm.”

“All I said was ‘thank you.’”

“Yeah, too sappy; I’d rather you go back to dumping popcorn down my shirt.”

His face turned red. Too easy. “I did not.”

“Did too.”

“Nope.”

I had the popcorn in my hand and, well, if life gave you kernels… “Oh, okay then. Here,” I said and held it out to him.

He, of course, recoiled. “No; you eat it.”

“I don’t want it,” I said and kept going. He scooted away like I had cooties, so I scooted closer until he was up against the arm of the couch. Short of leaping off of it he wasn’t getting away from me. “Come on; eat it.”

“No!” he said and shielded his face with his arm.

“Why not? If it didn’t go down my shirt then it must be perfectly fine,” I said and leaned over him.

Steve apparently disagreed, and we tussled. The fact that we pushed back and forth meant he was seriously holding back but it was funny, especially when I managed to drop the popcorn on him and he snapped. Gently, but I ended up on my back on the couch with him pressing down on my arms. Again, lightly, but he was making real sure I couldn’t get that popcorn back (wherever it had gone).

“You are such a wuss,” I said, still laughing.

“And you’re gross,” he chuckled.

“Hey.” I frowned. “I shower. I shower more often than I clean the floor.”

He shook his head. “I didn’t mean you were dirty, I–” He stared down at me, like he was realizing where I was for the first time, and he jerked away off of me– and the couch– like I was fire.

It happened so quickly I didn’t know what the hell to make of it. “Are you okay?” I asked and slowly sat up.

“Are you?”

That didn’t clarify why he wouldn’t even look at me. “I’m okay. Why–” Oh. Was that it? “You didn’t hurt me, if that’s what you’re worried about?”

He looked blank for a second, but then– “Yes. That.” He sat back down on the other end (on the very, very edge) of the couch. “I forget sometimes, how…strong I am.”

He still sounded weird in a way that made me wonder if I was missing something, but I sat up and gave him the space he apparently needed. Even watching TV felt awkward. At least, at first, until an unfortunately familiar image flashed on the screen. Awkward mood or not didn’t stop me from gagging when that stupid fucking turkey commercial came on.

“Not a fan of Thanksgiving?” Steve asked dryly as I raced to change the channel.

“I like Thanksgiving fine, I just hate that fucking nightmare mascot,” I said and sat back, safe now with c-level horror nonsense. “Also I’m tired of holidays creeping on other holidays. Stay in your month.”

Steve laughed a little and as much as I hated it, I had to be thankful (ugh) to that awful commercial for breaking the weird tension. “Thanksgiving is okay though,” I said. “Terrible history, but I get two days off and an excuse to gorge myself. What’s not to like about that?”

“Are you going anywhere?”

“Nah. There’s a place I usually order from. I’ll get some good food, put something on the TV, and just dick around for the day.”

He smiled and nodded, like that was exactly what he had expected from me. Well, I never claimed to be super unpredictable. “What are you going to do for it?”

“Oh, I don’t know.” He shrugged and looked genuinely troubled. “Everybody else is pretty busy this year. I’ll probably just…do what I normally do. Where do you order from?”

Interesting. My plans were something I liked but it figured he wouldn’t be thrilled with that– he liked people, and being around people. I wasn’t the best company…but I was people. And Steve, somehow, always managed to be an exception to my rule.

“Hey,” I said. “Why don’t you come over?”

He looked a little stunned. “No, that’s– it’s okay. I’ll be fine.”

“I know you will,” I said. “But we hang out all the time and Thanksgiving is boring, if for no reason other than traveling is kind of a pain in the ass.” Admittedly I hadn’t really cared before the one time I’d needed to get to Manhattan, but I doubted I would ever forgive Macy’s for that nightmare. And Steve had to get around there sometimes, so maybe he found it annoying too. “We can order a lot of food together and just sit and eat and do what we’re doing now. And if Tony gets snide you can tell him you have plans.”

“I tend to make sure I do have plans,” he said and ran his hand through his hair. “Volunteering, mostly; there’s always something that needs to be done and I’ve got the time, so why not me? And it’s good, but maybe…” He looked up and stared at the wall like there was something worth considering. “Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad to have the day off.”

I was maybe too happy about winning that little debate, but hey, at least I had won something that night. Later, after having insisted that he could see himself out while I was too drowsy to argue, (the jerk), I tried to cement our plans. In my own way.

“Hey Steve?”

He stopped. I leaned on the arm of the couch to stretch out my back. “If anybody asks why you're not at a soup kitchen or any of that bullshit,” I said, “Just tell ‘em that you know someone who was gonna be real lonely at Thanksgiving and begged you for company. Clinging, crocodile tears– the works.”

It got a smile and a chuckle out of him, but he also looked mildly offended. He gave me a wry smile and said, “Soup kitchens aren’t bullshit.”

“They’re not,” I agreed. “But the idea that you don’t deserve a day off with the rest of us is. You do a lot, Steve. If you want to take care of anyone else, you have to take care of yourself too.”

He looked hesitant. I cleared my throat. “And there’s no better way to do that than to slip into a food coma.”

He laughed– so loud it surprised us both. His smile was easier when he said, “I’ll take your word for it.”

“You’ll get to test it out, actually,” I said. “I’ll bring a menu around sometime this week and as soon as we sort out food I’ll place the order.”

“Sounds great.” He slung his pack over his shoulder. “Good night.”

~

Picking the food was easy enough. Mostly. Steve thought he was more boring than he actually was and I made a mental note of some of the things he looked at the weirdest that I knew he would end up stealing if I gave him a chance. He also wanted to figure out how much the food would be so he could give me the money right away, but when he insisted on calculating out the ratio of portion sizes to price I checked my watch and gave up.

“Oh my god; if you make me do this much math on my break I’m going to make you pay for all of it,” I groaned into my hand.

“Okay!” Steve replied, blatantly unbothered by the idea.

I opened my mouth to argue but then I thought about the energy it would take, and the smug look currently on his face, and how much did I really care about any of this? “Fine,” I said, to his obvious surprise. “I’m hosting, and actually getting the food, so you can take care of paying for it. We’ll call it ‘The Asshole Tax.’”

“We’re not calling it that,” he said, but he was sort of smiling. Because he was totally okay with being an asshole. So I ripped a page out of my notebook, wrote down the total, titled it ‘Asshole Tax,’ and dropped it in front of him as I stood to pack and leave.

“That is a lot of food,” he said, frowning at the menu as I stowed it away. “Maybe I should go get it too.”

“Do you want to explain to some random cashier why you’re picking up food under my name?” I asked. He frowned further and I rolled my eyes. “Don’t worry, I’ve got it covered. In the meantime–” I shook my drink and took a sip. “Enjoy your boba.”

He scowled at me but pulled his drink closer. Just before I left I heard him mutter, “Just because I like it doesn’t mean it isn’t weird.”

I rolled my eyes and walked away, already mentally doubling at least two of the dishes.

~

The weeks passed like I was living the last month of high school all over again, but finally the day came. Steve came over about noon and I gave his jeans the stink-eye, until he brought his backpack around and partially pulled out a pair of drawstring pants.

“Do I fit the dress code now?” he asked.

“Yes,” I said and let him in. “I’m not going to be the only one in my PJs, but I’m also not dressing up.”

“I know better than to ask that,” he said and narrowly dodged a swat from the spoon I had been using to stir the gravy. Pro of going with traditional food: this place made it so good. Con of going with traditional food: there was some reheating involved. Ultimately it was all worth it though. I couldn’t wait to hear what Steve thought; I really hoped he didn’t regret this.

“Go get changed,” I said and waved it threateningly. “Food’s almost all ready.”

He grinned. “Okay, but, uh…” He leaned forward. I moved back, not sure why he was suddenly so close, until he reached in and…wiped some gravy off my cheek.

“You might want to watch out for karma,” he said with that stupid fucking smile.

I chased him to the bathroom but he was too quick to slam the door on my face. I stalked back to the food and, manners be damned, started loading up my plate first. He came back in comfy pants and a too-tight t-shirt that I immediately snapped the sleeve of.

“Hey!” he said and bumped into my side.

“I’m not the one buying shirts tight enough to double as rubber bands,” I said. I gestured at the food spread out across all available counter space. “Eat up. Cold stuff is still in the fridge and snack stuff is on the coffee table.”

“This looks great.” He hugged me with one arm. “Thanks for getting it.”

“Yeah yeah, get your stuff and sit down,” I said and took my food over to my little corner of the couch. I had a blanket for me and a blanket for Steve, a selection of nonsense to watch on the TV that was not parade-related, and a view of grey skies from a warm and brightly-lit apartment.

It was going to be a good day.

I even got a little vindication when I went back to the fridge to get something to drink and saw Steve very intensely eyeing a casserole he had pooh-poohed on the menu when we were picking things out. He glanced at me, glanced at the food, and I took in the sight for several seconds before telling him, “Fine, you can have half,” and before I even finished the sentence he had scooped his entire portion right onto his plate. It took up almost the whole surface. “You should trust me by now when I tell you things are good.”

“I wish I could agree with that,” he said and gave me a disapproving look.

“Hey, you said pick a lunch place and I took you to a burger joint,” I said innocently. “Sure it had a weird name, but the food was good, right?”

“You knew what you were doing,” he said, staring down at me.

I lasted about two seconds before I broke and laughed.

And the day was good. Steve was someone I could hang out with without fear, and I had only been half-joking about the dress code– because he brought clothes to lounge in, I didn’t feel self-conscious in mine. And the way he looked so enviously at my unicorn slippers even gave me an idea for a good holiday gift.

And since we were hanging out on the couch, it was natural that we gravitated closer together. Natural, but when I finally noticed just how close we were, I froze up a little. Was it okay for me to–

“You can lean back if you want,” he said.

“Really?” I asked and eyed his chest.

“I’m more comfortable than I look,” he said. “Or so I’ve been told. By Natasha. And Maria. And Bruce. Even Thor, one time.”

Well, if that was an okay thing to do then I was going to do it. I felt…probably more excited than I should have, but I figured it was just nice to be so comfortable with another human being. I didn’t know if I ever had felt like this before.

But I played it cool. “Hm,” I said and lay back. He was warm, firm, and yes, surprisingly comfortable. I felt a little thrill of anxiety when he wrapped his arm around my stomach, but it was just for a moment, and then I was able to relax into him. “I can see how people say that.” I felt so good. “You’re pretty cozy.”

“An excellent commendation,” he said. I sighed, perfectly content, and shut my eyes.

~

I woke up to darkness, with only the light of the TV.

Steve shifted suddenly behind me and I jerked away, ready to apologize, when I saw his eyes were shut tight, and his motions were short and twitchy. He mumbled nonsense but his face furrowed in anguish.

“Steve.” I shook his shoulder. “Steve!”

He didn’t wake up right away. Tears actually started spilling from his eyes and at the sight of that I panicked and shook harder. “Steve!”

His eyes snapped open and he jerked up and grabbed my shoulders. It didn’t hurt but I couldn’t move while he took in his surroundings. He gasped but didn’t say anything, though he did loosen his hands so he could put them to his eyes. I gently wrapped my arms around him while he rode out the shockwaves, and soon enough he put his arms around me. “I got you, Steve; it’s okay,” I whispered and rubbed his back. He clung to me and we sat just like that for a little while, until Steve’s short breathing evened out and he was able to take a deep breath.

Even still, he was reluctant to let go. “You wanna hear a secret?” I asked him, not intending to let him go until he was ready.

“Sure,” he said weakly. But he relaxed and stayed right where he was.

I cleared my throat and admitted, “I think I like hugs.”

He chuckled. “The resident miser? Likes hugs?”

“I know. You can’t tell anyone,” I said. “Also, sorry if I suck at them; I’m not exactly practiced.”

“I think you’re just fine. But I’m not well-practiced either,” he said. He pressed his face into my shoulder and my stomach did a somersault. It felt so good; I wanted to wrap him up in my arms forever and–

Oh.

Oh no.

Oh no.

“Maybe we should practice more.” He pulled away, smiling, but that smile hit me in a different spot. Harder. “Together.”

Fucking hell. “That sounds nice,” I said before Impulse Control could kick me in the face. Because it did sound nice. It sounded so nice it would have made him uncomfortable by how much I loved the idea. I loved the idea.

I loved him.

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[spacegaywritings]

Warming Paws and Melting Walls (3/8) “Making Adjustments”

General

Summary: Emile lets Remy take Virgil to work. Negotiations ensue.

Tags: Emile, Remy, cat virgil, mentions of kidnapping but no actual kidnapping, nervousness, cat treats, boxes, cute shit, snuggles, crushing on your boss, arguing with cats, remy is being salty all the time, swearing, bitch bitch remy, phone calls, mentions of work, ew social, Remy hates people but he is valid, loneliness, pining, subtle lovey lovey.

Virgil and Emile are referred to by they/them pronouns.

i do not think there is any to be applied. If you need me to add anything, please contact me here or on my tumblr (spacegayparty, spacegaywritings)

ao3: 1 / 2 / 3 / 4 / 5 / 6 / 7 / 8 // all.

tumblr:  1 / 2 / 3 (you are here) / 4 / 5 / 6 / 7 / 8.

  My KoFi  - Support me ♥ or Commission me

Story under the cut // Word count: 4,4k

   “No.. I can’t. You don’t get it, I cannot come for the life of me!”

 Remy gripped the phone in his hand tighter. His knuckles turned white. Not once in his life had he even dreamed of a scenario of this sort. No nightmare could ever reach into the depth of his personal fears like this. He was enraged, somewhat nervous. One of his hands was on the couch scratch the smooth, cool surface.

Reality was much crueller than imagination could ever be. Real life wrote stories that nobody could come up with - history was the perfect piece of evidence. People fighting alligators and smuggling foxes or colour-coding genitals. Human society was so fucked up, people did not even realise it. The most unbelievable shit happened all the time.

 Right now, it was happening to him. Despite this, he tried, he really tried to get this right.

 “Remy, you can’t just tell me you are not coming and then not give me a reason. Is anything wrong? Do you need help?”

 Emile’s voice dropped from a somewhat sharp and scolding sound into the usually concerned sound. That pal was just made to care about others, weren’t they?

Even now they were more supposed to get upset and threaten him, when they were just worried about him. Remy wanted to roll his eyes at the display of pure wholesomeness but he did not have it in him to tease them about this.

 “Okay, listen here. I know that is a shit thing to do. You guys are not prepared to be without me but I got some kinda emergency here, honey. I can’t handle work right now, not with them around. Or not around - Sorry, boss.”

 The man carefully brushed over the kitten in his lap, the shivering little thing meowing pitifully. They were wailing out the feelings Remy gritted into his teeth.

 “Alright, alright- wait. Wait a minute right there. What do you mean? Is anyone holding you against your will? Remy, I am concerned about you.”

 Remy blinked for a moment at how much the whole conversation as much as Emile’s reactions to his words were a fucked over roller coaster that went back and forth and off-track periodically but irregularly so. It was unpredictable and honestly so draining. But understandably, the pal had some worries for their employees, especially Remy since he got into big piles of sick days due to his chronic migraines and physical issues. Still, it was a little absurd to expect him to be kidnapped. He was way to sassy to stay put.

 “Uh, I mean, I would like to go to work but staying at home always sounds nicer than, like, being productive. Sounds like a big nappy time to me, if you are asking me, honey.”

 Right after saying that, Remy realised that he was still sort of talking to his boss and probably should choose his words with at least a BIT more care, as of this moment. Emile was nice but they were not some dumb idiot who would let Remy do whatever with them.

 “Uh, okay. Let me explain, honey. I picked up this cat and I don’t know, like, whose it is and I put up those papers and put ads on PhotoAlbum in several groups (it was a lot of work, sweetie. Would not recommend. Totally busted my weekend! So rude.). I also posted to some page that deals with missing animals of this area and all that kinda shit. I still got, like, a sweet nothing and the cat is really sad and they won’t let me go out. I am - I don’t want to leave the cat alone. You know, Virgil might all up and fuck over my flat and I have nobody to babysit them - catsit them? Whatever.”

 Silence engulfed their phone call for a moment.

Remy was met with nothing but more little mewls which he quickly stilled by brushing further over their soft fur. Were cats supposed to have more dense fur than this? It felt a little thin, especially for winter coming up. Was that a black cat thing? The vet had not mentioned anything about that. Just to give the cat a stable and proper diet at, like, a scheduled time because stability. Which made sense and all but... Ugh, maybe he had to go there again or ask the internet or just get a book.

 Emile cleared his throat after a while.

The doctor really did know how to get some attention. For some unknown reason, it felt like one of the hottest things to Remy how the man could just draw the attention back to him with the most subtle gestures on this fucking planet. They were still considered to be nice and soft and all that kinda fun stuff when they were actually not just sweet and adorable. Emile could be serious and it was almost frightening to know them in control. 

 "Remy, if neither you nor your cat - " 

 "Virgil. Their name is Virgil." 

 "Alright. If you are healthy and so is Virgil, I don't think I can excuse you at work. As much as I would like to, you are our one and only receptionist." 

 Remy's heart fell and he let out an audible sigh. It felt like pushing bricks through his windpipe when he could have breathed regular oxygen. 

Whether his employer was hot or not, he couldn't just treat them like a friend or talk to them like some guy he wanted to hook up with. Okay, he kinda did but he tried to not listen to those thoughts. For once in a lifetime, Remy actually felt somewhat bad talking to Emile. He wanted to tell them off and never like his boss again. His chest was a fierce burning and he wanted them to regret being inconsiderate of the little kitten. 

 Didn’t they know Virgil was an abandoned stray? They were confused and all alone in the middle of winter in a big, heartless city!

 "I appreciate your honesty, still. But Remy, listen. If your cat is new and you are scared of leaving him -" 

 "They. Virgil gets they /hem pronouns because they are a special person and deserved not to be misgendered." 

 "Alright. If you don't want them to be home alone, how about we make work a little more home for hi- them." 

 Remy pressed his lips into a thin line. For a moment, he hummed in deliberation. 

 "What do you mean?" 

 Virgil meowed on his chest and patted the phone in interested. Remy was sure they wanted to play. Emile received a little thud on their end.

 "We keep your door closed and a little darker and hang up signs for people to try and be quiet so they can sleep. Cats sleep almost all day. Much more than we need." 

 The receptionist nodded but realised that Emile could probably not see that. 

 "Sounds okay." 

 Emile let out a hum. 

 "You would really do that? I'll get ready and come over with them." 

 His boss let out a laugh. Remy's queer heart was blooming in delight. Maybe they were not bad. They just had obligations too and these needed to be fulfilled. Other than Remy, Emile was running a business and needed his employees. Remy only had a void on his lap and softness in his heart.

 Of course! Why didn't Remy think about that. Any kind of doctor needed to take an oath, swearing to protect all life. Emile had to prioritise their clients. 

 The cat meowed and Emile giggled again. 

 "Hello Virgil! See you later, I hope" 

 Remy's heart was beating so fast, he nearly swooned loud enough for Emile to hear him. His eyes closed and the sugar-sweet smile on his face refused to leave. Instead, it revelled on his lips for another few moments. 

 "I'll pack up and see you in a few." 

 Emile smiled, unbeknownst to Remy.

 “Can’t wait to see you at work, Remy.”

 *

 Upon arrival, Virgil ducked away and cuddled up to Remy's chest. They were snuggled up under his jacket which they shared with Remy. Such a humble gesture. Whenever the cat heard a sound, they cuddled closer and flinched away from any source of sound other than Remy. 

His footsteps? All okay. 

Someone coughing? Fucking illegal. 

 Remy was more than happy to know he brought about as much food and little things for Virgil to ease up and calm down. It should ease them up. But he couldn't change the smell and make it more comfortable for the cat to relax faster instead of hiding away a lot. 

It was still a wonder to him that Virgil was so trustworthy with him but then again, they all assumed they had been socialised before. But he didn't find a single person claiming to own the little void. Not yet, at least.

 The man walked over to his little "office" only to be stopped from stepping inside. 

A sign, as promised. But that one wasn't for the others to be quiet. It was for him to move into the bigger office. 

 “Reception moved to the main office.”

 .. The main office was much bigger and Remy didn't know how Emile made it a usable working space for him and at the same time an adequate living space for Virgil but he would give it a try. If not, he would need to get some student to catsit his baby for a few hours every day. It wasn't like he desperately needed these bucks, anyway. It was okay. And he was willing and happy to spend it on his Virgil when they needed it more. He himself was glad, already. He had books and nice things but Virgil had nobody and had yet to be picked up by their original home.

 A happy void was a good void and he wanted his void to be their best at all times. At least for the time being.

 Virgil meowed and pawed at Remy. There was hesitation in their movement and after that, they stayed quiet as if to wait for their friend to reply to their request. The man just gently hushed the kitten by stroking over their black fur and humming a bit, quietly so.

The surroundings were so white, so new and it smelled of stingy disinfectant sprays and other things. One of the walls was pastel pink. It was not just cold but also warm but not warm like Remy was warm. Or Virgil, for that matter. He was just glad to wear his sunglasses loyally.

 Virgil curled further into the black jacket.

 “It’s okay, Queen, you will be fine”, he promised.

 He made it to the office. The only time he had been in this place was when he had applied for this position not too long ago. A few years, maybe. This was Emile’s personal office. He was standing in his office and his things were in here. Emile usually did not have too many things around but the pictures and the pastel walls were giving off a warm vibe. Again, it was not the Remy-kind of warmth but it was warm nonetheless and it made him feel funny things he could not quite place.

Sometimes he forgot there was more than his own working space. That, and the fact that Emile had his own practice close to his home. He had probably been here early and had used the time to move furniture and accommodate Remy.

 Literally, what kind of employer would ever do this?

 This office was innocent and playful like going to the kindergarten or being on a swing. It was simple and natural. Natural despite pastels being a little less naturally occurring, especially in a city like the one they were living in. Still, it was a soft colour and had some sort of soothing effect on him.

 Remy carefully nudged the door close behind him and brought Virgil over to the table where he was supposed to sit and work. The desk was larger and the wood looked like oak, perhaps. He was not the type of guy to know much about things. He just liked books and partying. He was a simple soul.

 But his boss? He seemed to mind. Emile must haven taken time to invest in a certain vibe this office would convey. Maybe it was a psychology thing It calmed him down for sure.

 Now, while the walls and pictures screamed Emile, they also hummed Remy’s tone. His desk was filled with little pictures and decorations he had brought to make himself more at home.

That was about the only delight he could relish in, working as an assistant or secretary or however people wanted to call his profession. Whatever, he was just there to welcome clients and give them some treatment plans he had printed according to Emile’s orders. Sometimes he would make appointments with people and negotiate about finances and payment plans. He checked prescriptions and other things, too. He mostly took care of all the social interactions beside the actual treatment Emile gave.

 Yeah, Emile had it all figured out and believe it or not, Remy was actually great at keeping some order together and be somewhat effective with people. He kept track of every person and their schedules. He just knew which days to propose and which days, dates and times were impossible due to things such as soccer practice for the kids or school or religious rituals and family traditions.

 Say whatever you want, Remy was good enough at his job to keep it yet still flip off enough people.

 However, now he needed to settle down and enjoy the new space.

Or, well, absolutely hate how much it smelled of Emile and how it felt warm like them and their sweaters. Having the hots for his boss or uh, higher-up, was definitely the best thing to ever happen to him. Maybe not the best but it was entertaining to say the least. Virgil, on the other hand, was quite..quiet.

 The smol kitten was put onto the desk with care. Remy was handling a precious piece of creature right there after all. He watched them for a moment, the cat just crouching down and looking at him with wide, heterochromatic eyes.

Right into his heart and soul.

 “I love you too, royal stray. Now let me work before I get fired, Queen of salt”, Remy offered and let his bag down.

 He made some space, turned on the computer and gently nudged the cat. Virgil refused to budge and stayed put in front of the keyboard.

 “Kitten, I gotta work. Wanna sit on my lap? You can cuddle with me while I work.”

 Remy looked at them but there was no answer. Were cats the clever ones? Or was this dogs?

Well, whatever, it’s not like Virgil would just suddenly all up and speak actual words. This was not a magical place after all, it was just a boring office.

Or a warm office, actually. Not that it really mattered. (It did, to him.)

 “Caaat, come on, I need to work.”

 Remy put his arms around Virgil to at least type his log-in data into the computer and get his whole shit set up and finally started. After some time, he could start receiving calls and schedule things again. It was bad enough he was so late. He probably had a ton of emails to check about how some people needed to reschedule something or needed an extra appointment, maybe even an emergency one.

 People, right?

 Nothing was ever right with people, it was inconsistent. Apparently, cats were not really as consistent either.

Maybe living things just sucked and Remy did not know how to deal with that.

The black blob of fur was still unmoving and even with the arms awkwardly surrounding them, they would not take any more action than purring.

 Purring. Fucking purring.

 “Virgil, come on. Quit your bullshit and move, you are not supposed to be comfortable in my working space.”

 “Meow”

 “Yeah, meow you too, little bitch.”

 Remy rolled his eyes, looking for his brain so he could interrogate why the fuck he was actually arguing with a cat. Like talking to his brain was actually more sensible than discussing things with a cat and somewhat expecting a rational answer.

 “Okay, Queen, how about that: We can find you a box. You like boxes and I should have a box here - for paper. I swear, I will go totally feral if they threw this away. Anyway, I will just take away the paper and you can get all comfortable in the box, just like at my place.”

 Virgil looked at him, purring and vibrating in interest. The sparkling eyes fixed on the man and Remy nodded. The void seemed to be pleased by this suggestion. Remy was allowed to breathe around the feral beast for a little longer. Great. 

The secretariat let himself drop into his swivel chair and he quickly rolled over to the printer and took the stash of printing paper out for the sake of making space for his kitty friend. Damn yes, he was glad Emile had not thrown this away. He would have trusted them to do such things.

 “Oh Virgil~”, he purred out in a voice akin to songs more than simple words, “come here, kitty kitty.”

 The kitten looked over, tail swishing around for a moment. They looked as if they were ready to get up and maybe even cooperate for a second. What a day of fucking miracles.

 Remy experimentally patted the box and Virgil slowly moved over, purring still and with passion It sounded like the whole room was driven by the engine that was nothing but Virgil’s curious sounds. They were unique and even if Remy was sighing in exasperation at how much time the cat took to INSPECT AN EMPTY BOX OF CARDBOARD, he was smiling.

 Eventually, Virgil was done sniffing and patting the box with paws and nose. They actually stepped into the small space and settled into the space like cat pudding.

Wasn’t there some stupid shit of cats being liquid? He did not remember it quite well but he was sure there was something like that.

 “There you go, little void. I got a treat for you, you are doing so well.”

 He quickly pulled a little snack out of his bag and handed it to his kitten who took it immediately.

Virgil’s nose was twitching for a moment and their little teeth crunched on the small treat as if this was the most festive and fancy meal they would ever receive. Those teeth looked like straight out of some vampire novel.

But was that shit really so tasty for cats?

 ..He kinda wanted to try that but he was human and he would probably hate that shit. He also kinda felt odd about the idea of eating Virgil’s food. He had his own food, seriously. He had such dummy thicc ideas sometimes.

 “You are the best little void”, Remy cooed and softly bonked their heads together.

 Virgil’s insistent purring gradually seeped into the human. Closing his eyes, Remy just stayed in place and brushed his hand through the little kitten’s charcoal fur for a little while longer. It was warm. Warm like hugs were warm and drinking hot chocolate or similar drinks that made him feel fuzzy and sleepy.

Maybe he met the kitty cat in winter, so he would be warmer and not the cat themself.

  “You two sure look comfortable!~”

 Remy ripped himself away from the dark kitten, his head whipping around so quickly, he could hear it giving off the sound of something breaking. Oops, neck. Sorry, not sorry. His reaction was so quick and violent, someone might have thought he was a teenager whose parents walked in on him pleasing himself. As expected (yet somewhat at the same time, not really), the boss themself was standing there and looking at Remy and Virgil cuddling. Emile chuckled but apologised at the scare they had driven into the others.

 The coffee-lover could do no more but raise an eloquent eyebrow instead of stuttering up some weak apology. He was not about that kind of speech anyway. Too much work. Instead, he was the type of person to, well, arch an eyebrow at his boss.

Virgil’s colourful eyes were focused on the intruder. They stared into Emile’s soul. 

 “Virgil is doing okay”, he replied as he pulled up his work email account and scheduling programme to put the things together.

 Oh dear coffee bean, he still needed to check voice mail for all the info he had missed. Emile pressed their lips into a thin line for a moment before letting them pop back out.

 “You know, you can tell me these things first things in the morning instead of not coming and sending me ominous texts. I am more than inclined to helping you when I know that you are in need of certain accommodations.”

 Remy nodded but kept his eyes on the screen. For a brief moment, the man glanced over at his boss and clicked his tongue. He acknowledged them for just long enough to be somewhat polite.

 “Thanks.”

 He shrugged and Virgil meowed…in agreement?

 “Aw your kitten is so cute! Where did you get them again?”

 The doctor came into the office and slowly approached the kitten. Their back arched a bit, making them smaller. Virgil shrunk away from them and their ears changed position.

 Remy gingerly grabbed the little box of void and pulled them closer in. The kitten’s eyes widened and their body tensed, seemingly jumping into a position to pounce onto the intruder or flee within the blink of an eye. If need be, they were prepared.

The man gently eased the kitten with small movements. He brushed the fur down until the void was in a more regular position but their small muscle strands were still obviously tensed up under his displays of affection.

 “They are shy. I found them around the trash in a side alley on my way home”, he explained curtly as he gently consoled the kitten who settled into the box once more.

 Safe box, good box.

Best little void.

 Remy was so proud of them for relaxing and trusting him. The flee stance was away and the cat did not look like they were a small kindergarten kid some big adult suddenly started yelling at for apparently no understandable reason. The kitten was doing well.

 “It’s okay, little Queen, bad Em will bow to your wishes, little darling.”

 Emile straightened their posture and smiled at the two before them, waving.

Could they do anything better than wave? They felt like an outsider watching an intimacy they would never be a part of. Like a child watching the perfect family from the other side of the window.

It was so warm and so far away. The own world was so cool.

 Yet it was another kind of warm. Not smiles and soft words warm, it was more than reassurance and paid trust. There was a whole relationship in this warmth. It had established within just a few days. The time span was so strikingly short, the individual was genuinely shocked to have missed so much of Remy’s life in just a moment.

 Emile pressed their lips together again and sighed.

 “I just wanted to let you know that you can have the office if that helps. I will stack cat food and toys for the kitten, if you want to. I hope that helps you accommodate. But I need you to help me plan the refurbishment of your old office, then. Got any time during lunch break?”

 Remy shrugged.

 “I mean, if I do not have to catch up on anything else, sure. I cannot go out with Virgil. This is too much for them.”

 He glanced at them and gently pulled the kitten-box closer to his stomach.

 “You okay there?”

 Virgil meowed and was rewarded yet another pat on the head. The cat pushed against the gentle hand, eyes squeezed shut. Remy looked at them instead of his boss.

 “Okay, good. Now let me work, you demanding little bitch. I got your business to handle and finances to take care of.”

 The cat slowly blinked at him and he chuckled. Emile cleared his throat.

 “Good then. I’ll leave you to it.”

 “Yeah whatever”, he cooed before he redirected his attention to the screen before him where he started scanning the first emails with plan changes. His right put down the notes of it with little abbreviations. Mrs. Shuster was probably running late again. He really needed to have a talk about this with Emile.

 Talking about this, the pal was still standing there, abandoned eyes on the unattending Remy. He was patting Virgil with one hand and started clicking and reading at incredibly fast speed with his other hand.

Emile did not notice they were staring, standing still as they were captivated by the simple scene before them. When Remy’s cool eyes, shaded by sunglasses, suddenly looked at them, they realised they had yet to leave.

 “Anyway, I gotta get this stuff done. Need anything else?”

 His boss shook their head with a smile softer than butter in the sun.

 “I will leave you two to it. See you later, Remy, Virgil.”

 They nodded their head at each name and looked at the two. The void was basically invisible under the desk and in Remy’s lap.

Just safe and protected as the needed it.

 Emile left, swallowing the odd tightness in their throat.

[nodesiretogrowup]

I LOVED THIS EPISODE! It was nice to have a kid-focused episode. The past few have focused a lot on the adults, so it was nice to see the kids in the spotlight again. It was SO COOL to see the kids playing off each other. We NEED more of it next season. Lena is my daughter, so I was happy to see her back, though I’d rather she not have to suffer.

Spoilers and more detailed thoughts below:

YAY NERF GUNS! Also, it was super sweet of the boys to reassure Lena that they know she’s a good guy now. 

LOVED all the different jammies on display. I usually rock something similar to Lena and Violet. Dewey in the footie pajamas gives me LIFE. And Huey with his hat. I’m surprised he didn’t say something along the lines of “Warm head, warm dreams.”

Super cute that Lena set this all up. My baby wants friends.

“Self defense weapons, all manner of booby trap.” I feel like Violet would have suggested having those no matter what. I love my slightly feral nerd daughter.

Beakley for BEST bodyguard.

“Nothing weird is gonna happen at this slumber party.” Webby, babe, you’re just ASKING for trouble.

Lena’s little song and cake! MY HEART! I think Huey may have drawn some inspiration from that cake, lol

“Time loses all meaning in the infinite night of the shadow realm.” HELP THIS CHILD! And again, I think Donald would be the perfect parent for her.

“You are a wordsmith!” Webby LOVES her shadow gf.

THE FRIENDSHIP BRACELETS! AND THEY MATCHED EACH KID! HOW CAN YOU NOT LOVE THIS GIRL!

Of course Louie is suspicious. He was wary of his mom AND just spent the last episode getting betrayed by Goldie.

“You literally sound like that now.” Huey, you need to learn how to read a room.

“That’s just my voice, I can’t help it!” I feel ya there. And a nice bit of foreshadowing

“I’ve found it’s clearer to convey no emotion whatsoever.” Also not a good way to talk to people.

Aw, Lena. Like Webby said, you don’t have to prove yourself. That seems to be a running theme this season. Dewey wants to prove himself to his mom, Louie wants to prove himself to anyone, and Della wants to prove that she is a good mom and fits into this family.

“That makes you super-extra-good, right?” “Math checks out.” You two share one (1) brain cell and that’s adorable.

Webby has no table manners and that is valid.

“LET’S EAT PURE SUGAR!” That is just a bad idea in general, much less for Huey.

What happened to Huey? Why was his mouth all grey?

“You know who my best friend is?” “Me.” “Sleep.” A.) Mood, B.) Dewey’s face is PRICELESS! You can’t win them all.

Sleeping Beakley is TERRIFYING.

“It might be sleepy-time.” Webby, you are TOO PRECIOUS!

Anyone getting some Nightmare on Elm Street vibes? Specifically the third one? I guess that was what they were going for, what with the title and all.

Concerned girlfriend is concerned.

MY POOR BABY! HASN’T SHE SUFFERED ENOUGH?!

“Do you need, *whispers* you-know-what paper?” Not sure if Beakley told her toilet isn’t something you should go around saying or if Webby doesn’t want to embarrass anyone. Either way, cute!

Lena pulls of Dewey’s do well.

One of the most precious moments ever! And a reminded that they are still pretty young.

WEBBY IS SUCH A GOOD FRIEND/GIRLFRIEND! *happy tears*

LOVED the shot of Lena with the stars reflected in her eyes.

Heck, the animation for all the dreams is AMAZING! I love how you can INSTANTLY TELL whose dream we’re in.

I’m glad they figured out that they were in a shared dream early. Gives us more time for wacky dream shenanigans!

Webby/hamburgers is otp

I like that they used the “you can’t read in dreams” thing. Nice touch. It looks like at least Launchpad, Scrooge, and Donald had a corresponding emoji.

“Why are you dialing a banana?” DREAM LOGIC!

SWORD HORSE!

Webby CANONLY kins Scrooge!

EXTREMELY EXTREME OBSTACLE COURSE

Louie putting a stop to unicorn shenanigans before they begin.

Those directions. Better than Penny’s at least.

Violet is blunt and to the point. She’s probably a Virgo.

LIVING for all the cartoony sound effects!

POOR LENA! AND YAY SUPPORTIVE WEBBY! Also, love Louie in the background being confused as fuck.

That cute little smile! I WOULD DIE FOR LENA!

I don’t think the whole “don’t wake a sleepwalker” thing is actually valid in real life, but here it’s probably a goodish idea. Magic is weird and unpredictable.

“LET’S FLY, BECAUSE WE CAAAAAAN!” I like the way you think. I love that Louie’s wings have dollar signs. And Lena’s bat wings are DOPE.

“I HATE WALKING!” Louie is MOOD.

Huey and Dewey crashing, lol

That unicorn got DEEP. And I now crackship him and Manny.

Lena walked into Snow White.

“I probably grew horrible bat wings for non-evil reasons.” It’s because you are a baby goth.

“I ATE A BUG!” Dewey, you are a special boy and that’s valid.

“Ew, Webby, why is there a school in your dream?” Again, Louie is MOOD.

Ugh, I wish I could make out what the sign in front of the school says. I see EXCELLENCE though.

Dewey CONFIRMED HSM fan. And I’m getting some Saved By The Bell vibes. He’s binged ALL the high school classics. This is probably how Mabel dreamed high school would look like before the crushing slap of reality hit her.

His hair and jacket. Too cute, expect for his hair being alive. That was freaky. I fear for him when he learns what high school is actually like.

His song. Dewey is in for HEARTBREAK. LIVE YOUR DREAM WHILE YOU CAN!

I know most people are going with Dewey is bi after the whole romantic interest thing, but I feel like he might be aro/ace. Dewey is threatened by choosing a romantic partner. I’ve kind of always seen him as ace though, so it might just be me. Or it could be him trying to figure out his sexuality, which is cool. I love that the crew threw that in. The boy is not straight in any way though.

I love that Dewey’s singing rivals are Beagle Boys.

“Who knows what that’s about?” “I have some theories.” SYMBOLISM!

Dewey Dude is upsetting even BEFORE it turned into Magica.

The balance between comedy and STRAIGHT UP HORROR was handled well.

Lena has watched Wizard of Oz.

“You ruined my big dance!” Priorities, Dewey. Louie looks relieved though.

Dewey’s hair looked super cute when it was wet.

Why did he and Lena taste the water? Is there some sort of significance there?

“I just failed a class called Dew-ology.” “Well I’m the class Dew-torian.” That’s stretching it, Dewey.

“I gotta get outta here.” Haha, Dewey’s dream is Huey’s nightmare.

Louie-field. I WANT PLUSHIES. Also, Louie confirmed furry?

“This is your dream? To be even lazier?” Don’t be a hater, Huey! Louie’s got the right idea.

Wonder if Beakley taking care of Louie-field means anything.

Seriously, Huey is SUCH a hater! He wants out of Dewey’s dream and he mocks Louie’s.

“HOW ARE YOU SLEEP-SLEEPING?” Don’t hate cause you ain’t. Also, I have napped in a dream once so....

Louie’s sleep face is MAJESTIC. HE’S BEAUTY, HE’S GRACE.

“I just am.” Louie is so wise.

Wolf Lena is BEST

Violet, there is a better way to talk about people’s psychological issues.

Why would you choose the litter box?

“WHY, HUEY, WHY?!” No arguments here.

I’m the eldest sibling like Huey and I’m the shortest of the three of us, so I get you, Huey. But there are better, cooler, less upsetting ways to manifest that dream. Like switching bodies with a tall person.

His legs make rubber band noises when he moves.

“Don’t listen to him! Follow your lame dreams.” What a supportive brother.

Huey’s dream is Dewey’s nightmare. Nice.

I too use my feet to do things, like opening doors or getting stuff off the floor. But opening jars of FOOD?! UNSANITARY AND YOU SHOULD KNOW BETTER.

Someone is a Spinel fanboy.

Or is he Slender-Huey?

“And it’s my dream to be in a montage.” While it is pretty dope, why does Dewey get two dreams?! Greedy little bastard. Are we sure he’s not the evil triplet, lol.

HERE’S HOW PHOOEY CAN WIN! Liked that they implied he’s the evil one. He’s a yellow, less 90s Dippy Fresh.

JUST SAY NO TO PHOOEY! His name means the f-word.

MORE DRAGON BALL Z!

NERD ALERT! 

Huey has found a kindred soul.

I like that Violet even has Quackfaster as a librarian.

“It’s almost 6am!” Your old man is showing. Sidenote-I tend to wake up around 6. I’m old.

“Go get some jobs!” Scrooge, do you know about child labor laws?

This is the second episode of this set that Scrooge comes off as a bit of a prick.

POOR LENA! At least all the kids care about her. The poor girl needs some friends.

“She’s gonna be cold without her sweater!” His heart’s in the right place.

I love that all the kids jump in after Webby immediately. NEVER LEAVE A MAN BEHIND.

Louie just spinning in the background.

“I think this is more nightmare.” Thank you, Captain Obvious.

I want that castle as a playset.

Good lord this scene was hard to watch. It reminded me a lot of Raven in Ever After High (and Teen Titans Raven too). She’s so afraid of being predestined to become evil that it’s consuming her to the point that she can’t see anything else and feels stuck. Some of this really hit close to home for me because I deal with depression and anxiety and when a big episode hits it’s hard to find my way out. Luckily, just like Lena, I have a good support system.

 Magica gaslighting Lena was really upsetting to see.

Lena becoming Magica then a literal monster? LET MY DAUGHTER HAVE PEACE!

“Ugh, why does everything I say sound sarcastic?” Callback

Was that a hint at a Gargoyles reboot? I JOKE TO EASE THE PAIN!

#youtriedDewey

Dewey’s spinny eyes, lol

Webby is most competent fighter

Poor Louie. The past two episode have not been kind to him physically.

Lena will ALWAYS be there for Webby.

POOR LENA!

HURRAY FOR SUPPORTIVE FRIENDS!

FRIENDSHIP IS MAGIC, BITCH!

“It’s fine, FINE!” Just wait for puberty, Huey. It will be slightly less disturbing.

I TOTALLY CALLED THAT THIS WAS A PLOT FOR MAGICA TO GET HER POWERS BACK! YAY FOR BEING RIGHT!

Magica is meth aunt.

“I don’t need you. You need me!” THAT’S MY GIRL!

FERAL

I bet Magica is gonna lie about still having powers so she can get close enough to Lena to regain her powers and stab everyone in the back. Whether or not she succeeds... 

Boyd and Lena should start a club. The “I thought/felt like I was a real, flesh and blood being, had an existential crises over it, and am trying to deal with my evil relative” club. Huey’s the moderator, he’s working on his consoling badge.

[gulmoregirls]

Hey! Sorry for the lack of updates — there’s no excuse this time. I just kind of forgot to post, mostly because nothing overly exciting happened (with the hype and high point of s3 ending, the dean thing didn’t motivated me enough to come here express my hate)

But anyway, here i am! I can’t even remember when i stopped here. So, the good old recap it is.

Luke and Lorelai finally happening, little by little in s4, is everything we ever wanted. My mom was really glad, cause we are huge javajunkies here in this house. Kirk is becoming more and more my favorite character ever. He’s so extra it’s everything.

If that’s wasn’t established before, lemme make it clearer — Rory Gilmore is cancelled. She’s SO out of character, it’s annoying. College Rory is by far not what anyone expected based on previous experiences, and that includes me and my mom. Specially with the whole Dean thing. But that’s REALLY something, so I’m gonna elaborate on that.

For good part of the season Dean has been being mentioned as a good guy, rory’s sweet ex who her ex classmates remember. It’s just annoying! This entire arc with Dean makes no sense — I mean, I know Rory was a bit lost and needed someone comfortable she knew and who she knew wouldn’t challenge her enough. Just something old and familiar. BUT THE OLD AND FAMILIAR BOY IS MARRIED. And the famous smart Rory (season 1 rory) would never do such thing. It was terrible. Poor Lindsay!! She deserved so much better than an idiot as her unfaithful husband. It just disgusts me. In my opinion, it was not necessary to ruin Deans character like that. He could be remembered as the sweet first love that did his best, but instead asp made him a total jerk, and that’s the memory that sticks. And if Rory had to be so out of herself — go thru come kind of crises of something — i’d rather she had took off with jess instead. at least he wasn’t married and truly loved her. Not that wish it had happened — would be just as random as sleeping with a married guy. But between getting together with the married ex and running away with the unpredictable one, i guess the less problematic alternative is really obvious.

Before we pass to the 5th season, let’s discuss jess then. I love his evolution. Wish we had seen it more closely in his spin-off. How he agrees to be at Liz’s wedding after everything he went through with her. And the way he reads Luke’s self-help/relationship books and decides to take an action. Even tho it was kind of crazy, it shows inniciative and I’ll give him that. Ignore this if you think that’s just a jess mariano supremacist saying shit.

OKAY SEASON FIVE

Lorelai and Luke ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️🤧💝

best part of the season by far.

Somehow, Rory’s relationship with Dean managed to be just as crappy as it was when he was married. Why couldn’t they just move on, right? It was annoying and the last drop that made us hate rory. don’t mind me — i can hate her and love her at the same time. She’s so stupid my crackhead heroin addicted daughter.

Even tho I’m not a team Logan, his appearance helped. He challenged Rory and made her realize that the world is more than that Dean-bubble she was in. During this season i could easily see myself as a sophies.

Then, of course, there’s the proof of how Rory can be DUMB. dropping out of Yale. Season six now.

How she refugees at her grandparent’s at the first sign of trouble and even so finds herself so independent, and the way she cuts off her mom just for wanting what’s best for her. Immature and spoiled.

Besides that, it bugs me that Logan was right there by her side and did NOTHING. Literally, the only thing he did was say that “in less than a month she would be back”. When that month passed by, he did nothing — possibly didn’t even noticed. In fact, I guess he was kind of liking her new life. After all, she did started to have more time for him. That’s probably why i don’t like their relationship (more reasons to come). Rory started to act as if she was him and completely lost track of her true self - even more than before. In her Chilton graduation she says that the person the most wanted to be was Lorelai, but she ended becoming the exact opposite, Emily. The DAR, the maids, dropping out of school, not battling for her stuff, just accepting and BESIDES THIS, acting all superior/wild and stealing a boat. THATS NOT HER. Ok, I get that she was upset because of Mitchum, but it’s not an excuse to that behavior. Plus, the real Rory Gilmore would have used his words as motivation to work even harder and prove him wrong.

In how many languages can you say THANK YOU, JESS ??????

He made her open her eyes - finally - and get her shit back together. He was so important!! And besides, the way he has made his life?? CAN YOU SAY CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT????? LOUDER FOR THE PEOPLE ON THE BACK!!!!

Lemme tell you, he is doing better than rory — who would have thought, right? The punk hoodlum rebel who dropped out of highschool was doing better than the private school girl straight As girl who got into Yale. And he’s happier too. Guy wrote a fucking book after several problematic life scenarios and is now working with people he likes doing what he has always loved. Ughhhh he has my entire heart.

Paul Anka, BTW!! love him 🤧😍

I also love how Lorelai proposed to Luke. They are goals. When she saw how much he cared for Rory, she was sure. In fact, maybe she was already sure, just needed a little push. And then all the signs and the snow!! I almost cried.

Now the Logan thing again. I like him — I swear!! I know it seems like i hate him and maybe i did when i first watched it, but now i see he is not that bad. But their relationship- nah. They’re annoying and rory has her weight on that, but that’s not just it. They’re cute, but there’s something missing. AND HE CHEATED ON HER. His story doesn’t match. It’s bad enough to break up with someone without them knowing. In fact, it’s REALLY bad. Rory was so confused and devastated. He should be more mature than that. Than ok, he says is just something he said Honor to make her stop talking. But then he sleeps with the bridesmaids. If he was honest with Rory and really didn’t mean it when he said they were broken up, then he TRULY cheated on Rory. If he lied about that, then he really decided that they were apart on his own. Their fight wasn’t even that serious, and he didn’t even reach out to her after that. The way she found out both times — through someone else — that is just wrong. Then he crows back buying her with money and stuff he knows she loved and she suddenly forgives him and moves in with the guy. Wrong too, ugh. Paris’ speech about Logan was everything. We deserved healing Paris and Rory growing their friendship together for more than five minutes.

I said she forgave him, right? Well, maybe not after all, because she wants a little revenge and decides to play with someone else’s real feelings. cold!! baby deserves better ); and then he gets into an accident and it’s all forgotten. ok....

just here to say that jess deserved recognition. He was the whole reason Rory came back and he did something great with his life. Still Lorelai sees him as the immature 17 yo he was. We were robbed of a great duo, them both. Their humor is really alike, a shame...

APRIL.

Poor girl, she doesn’t deserves all the hate. It’s not her fault duuuh

Asp could have made up something better for Luke this season. I think the storyline was a little non-sense and Luke, my sweet baby, gained my hate too.

Well, maybe not HATE but yeah i get where he’s coming from but it’s no excuse to lie to Lorelai and ruin their relationship. It was a pitty, really.

Then Lorelai coming to chris! what a breakdown huh? I guess it was expected, but i really hated it.

[unproduciblesmackdown]

3 am’s a crazy time for it but it occurs to me i may as well give a heads up that i am like, for real at the present assuming that i’m gonna like, sometime in the very near future here be going offline again, in that sort of my ~plan~ (my one-step plan) is seeing if i can get myself on a bus (hopefully) and see if that can get me to the west coast. and from there i’ll just be like, well here i am in a place i’ve never been before, being unhoused for the second time but this time not living in my car, which is a bit different than living right out in the open, which i’ve never done. this, for example, is why i was looking up how to do makeshift stp devices. way easier to be able to pee wherever you are than have to find a place you can drop your whole pants, or an actual bathroom. apparently cutting the end off one of those plastic liquid medicine measuring things with the sorta spoon at its mouth works. anyways

i suppose it hasn’t necessarily showed but for a few weeks now i’ve def been feeling The Impending Pressure and it was getting down to the wire there not knowing if the Last Day Online would spring itself on me suddenly. but i can at least say i think i’ll have a days warning now and be able to say something with at least a matter of hours forewarning and not like, a matter of minutes. its been sorta wild though like, sorta assuming its like a Two Days Remain situation and in the midst of the unpredictability of depression, trying to just enjoy things as they’re happening, the simple stuff like chatting with people and being able to put my bullshit thoughts online...cranking out a fic chapter because it’s at least a better place to leave it hanging than it wouldve been otherwise.....just consuming this content that’s enjoyable and chill af.......i tell ya what—both in terms of being Fun and Anxiety-Reducing and Good Distractions and also, a great opportunity just to be talking to people on the daily which has been and continues to be absolutely fantastic—having been On that deh/etc will roland train for the past couple months has been a total gift. it was some great luck stumbling into that, seriously

anyways it’s weird! it’s weird thinking just like, i’ll suddenly do this thing and be on the other coast and just step out and be somewhere i don’t know and with no particular destination and maybe the lgbt center i looked up will at least tell me whats the best area to be in, sometimes they’re in the know abt that re: where’s a better spot to be homeless in than others. and from there, y’know, all i’ve been doing for years and all i can continue to do is absolutely wing it. and it’s funny that this all seems slightly less intimidating to me than it wouldve like, a year or two ago (even tho two yrs ago i was technically homeless lol but living in my car so like i said its different from living Right on the street) but honestly, obviously, it’s still very intimidating because how could it not be. i’m maybe not AS anxious but i’m still anxious and even though i know i could do it, i’d be stressed tf out and anxious as hell and shit while i was doing it. i mean, a crosscountry bus ride alone—i’ve never done that!! what if i mess up switching over to a different connecting ride between stations. bus and train bathrooms unnerve me, god forbid i have to get past someone to get to the aisle to GO to the bathroom. and, yknow, just a really long bus ride—how do you manage to sleep, how do i manage not to fall asleep at the wrong time cuz i doubt there’s an attendant telling you to get off at the right stop. though god knows it’s somewhat arbitrary where i’m deciding to go, i have no especial connection in one particular place over another, i think i have an uncle and cousin in CA but i don’t have the first idea where and i don’t know them at all

ugh. like there’s no actual way to feel good about it but if i’m gonna go somewhere it might as well be in a completely different place and i could try the west coast and i’m not one for making careful plans or thinking that making careful plans about your life works unless you’ve already got a lot of control about your situation, which i don’t. and it’s always been p inevitable that i wind up “properly” homeless, and it happens, and i don’t pretend it doesn’t scare me, but what are you gonna do? c’est ca que c’est / la vie. this way there’s a chance that A Big Change might lead the way for something better, and like hey if i die or some shit i die, which has always been a possibility anyways for the past like 6-7 years especially, what with how shitty i’ve felt lol. but i have no attachment where i’m at now and just. it’s hard to explain i guess if you’re not in the kind of place where i’m at but there’s not a lot of choices in the first place so, if i can choose the location, if it can be somewhere new where i MIGHT like to be for once, that’s better than not. and somehow so far i’ve managed to go with the flow surrounding big changes and sometimes wild situations, even if i’ve felt like crap and been super worried sometimes too. i don’t know for how many years now i’ve been Not assuming i’d be alive by the next year, but here i am having gotten this far, at least. it’s fairly impressive even if i don’t have any amazing achievements. believe it or not i’m pretty satisfied with my Achievements as just like, dumbass blog posts and fic/art and occasionally contributing something someone enjoys and getting to talk to people sometimes. it’s how i’ve been able to enjoy myself in the midst of some really awful times for the past like 6 yrs and i’ve appreciated it every day i’ve gotten to surf the net

like i guess it’s like haha, nerd, that half of what i’m worried about is being offline. but it’s a big deal being able to connect w the world beyond your immediate reach and distract yourself and say things and maybe even Enjoy yourself and also actually get to talk to people. but hey sometimes even people who live on the street manage to snag wifi connections somehow. i’d have to ask them how, lol. but, yknow, like i said, for a couple weeks especially it’s been like , Not Assuming I’ll NOT Lose Internet Connection and thus really trying to bear down on appreciating it. not like being offline for 5 months or so didn’t also make me appreciate it extra already. i was gonna say i survived it but i did get wildly depressed throughout like, august? september? probably both lol. anyways. what i’m trying to say i guess is that i’m not actually assuming i’ll be okay, but that only means so much because like, not to sound dramatic but i’ve pretty much never been okay on account of ive been just a half step away from living on the streets ever since leaving my parents house where i’d previously lived my whole life, which was an abusive situation. and also the depression and the years of really wanting to die which, at least 2018 didn’t have TOO much of that, in terms of feeling like it might be impending. now i can’t really be bothered, i’m just floating along and if i die i die, right. what i’m trying to say is, there’s not really any Good Proper option to choose where i’m definitely okay, so it’s basically about choosing between bad options, and with this choice i might at least like the location a little better, change of scenery, not as cold as here, i dunno. there’s not a way to just choose my way into being okay. it’s all a roll of the dice anyhow

also it’s weird but one thing about being on my own is it takes the pressure off me in certain ways and it’s a bit easier for me to Do things. if there’s anyone else to answer to in any way, i tend to just not ever decide anything and definitely don’t pursue anything. i’m one of those ppl who either has to live alone or with ppl they’re really really really comfortable with, and since i don’t have the latter around and nobody especially me can afford the former, it’s like, well, how is not everybody homeless anyway, right? and people do it. because yknow, you have to do it, it’s suddenly just your situation and somehow people get through every day. idk. learn as you go. what can ya do. it’s choosing between various bad options, i could also just wander into the mountains and die, but i’d rather not, and offing myself is Way a hassle, and also would be difficult, same as dying of exposure/dehydration in this middle of nowhere patch of mtns. i might as well try my luck at being in a place where you COULD maybe survive or something, and where i could at least feel like, if i do manage to have any good things happen, i would even possibly want to be in that area and be more comfortable living there. i have no roots anywhere and only have a No Zone (near my parents house) and so its sorta like, pick a random place to be!! lol. ahhhh

what can i say. it also sucks having to think “boy, in addition to not dying, hope i don’t get physically/sexually assaulted—also, how do people get water??” but......such is the way that it is. i don’t know. i don’t think anybody looks at impending homelessness and goes “i’m okay about this and not at all afraid.” and it’s strange to talk about how this is sort of ~by choice~ but it’s not exactly, in that i didn’t choose to only have abusive family and how even though i was working while living in my car it would never have been enough for rent probably even if i had someone to split it with and i also didn’t choose to not be rich in the first place and *the economy...... .png*

sigh. i dunno, it’s hard because i can’t talk about it a right way or long enough and get to a point i don’t feel intimidated or upset that once i Go Offline i’ll for real just be on my own unless and until i manage to get online for a moment again, in which case i’ll still be on my own, but i’ll feel a bit less alone, ha ha

anyways. speaking of trying to appreciate the simple pleasures of talking about whatever weird shit i wanna talk about and pushing myself to draw/write as it feels like it gets even more down to the wire—time to do that! 4 am and time to draw this weird meme & hopefully crank out the rest of this oneshot & maybe even draw again, and maybe again—it’s cool cuz i slept weird the other night and then got again weirdly tired in the afternoon and took a long depression nap w sorta fun, sorta bizarre dreams. augh. so at least i figure i’m just cruisin now, Not Sleeping-wise

i might have to ask a favor eventually in that there’s something really super simple i ought to look up, but i’d have a ton of trouble making myself do so because of anxiety, yknow how it is. but i’ll ask that if and when i ask it

[krokodile]

Tumblr has decided that one of my posts “may contain adult content” and thus is blocked from public view.  However, after digging all the way back through to February, there’s no indicator that it’s been flagged.  So I can’t contest it.

It’s a fucking movie review post. 

I can only assume the bot spazzed out because it contains a review of the documentary “Fagbug.”

Needless to say I’m reposting everything now because I AM SO FUCKING PISSED.  Gay activist movies with inflammatory titles are “adult content.”  

(I mean, it sucked, but still.)

Aside from that, I can’t find any content that would anger a bot.  I mean, if the bot sat down and watched Take Me to the River, it’d probably get mad, but I don’t explicitly discuss any of its content, so...it included a picture of a child in a bathing suit from the waist up?  Is that it?  Did one of the movie posters look like nudity somehow?  Because I looked at all of them and aside from the potentially triggering flesh tones in Happy Death Day’s poster (that creepy baby face sure is sexy amirite) I, again, see nothing.  

And since you can no longer access the posts directly the only way to get the content back is to either harass tumblr via email until they allow the post back up or crawl through your posts on your own account, which can’t be done by day, just by page number.  I can’t begin to imagine how shitty this is for people who have original content worth preserving.

movies watched in 2018

take me to the river:  guys, here’s the thing.  horror is my favorite genre and i’m pretty deadened to everything with “shock value” in film.  this little indie drama here, though?  this genuinely managed to shock me.  i was sitting there at one point unable to believe i was actually watching what i was watching.

please keep in mind that i don’t think that scene was included for the sake of shock value; it was relevant and likely necessary.  i’m just saying that NOTHING gets to me in that way, and this did.

it’s a fantastic film, albeit one of those annoying enigmas with no real answers.  i would love to have an hour alone with the screenwriter just to find out what they were thinking of in terms of backstories.  every major performance is perfect - logan miller is incredible.  everyone’s performance is understated, natural and authentic.  the little girl who played molly - not sure of her name but i recognized her from “louie” - holds her own with some amazing adult performances and is just as authentic as everyone else.  robin reigert is quietly devastating, josh hamilton is equally quietly terrifying, richard schiff and azura skye disappear completely into their characters.  

the pacing is on the slow side, but it works well for the story.  i watched the entire thing with my stomach in knots, having no idea in hell where it was going.  on several occasions i genuinely expected a murder.  i’m not used to movies this quiet and slow being so unpredictable.  i had to keep pausing it to shake off the tension.  it’s also incredibly beautiful to look at.

this is one of those indie gems that is absolutely not for everyone - it touches on some subject matter than many would find deeply upsetting.  and i think the film means to be deeply upsetting, but again, it’s in a way that’s not for everyone.

i do wish there were more answers, because i have so many questions, but it does guarantee i’ll be thinking about this movie for years to come, so maybe they did that on purpose.

as an aside, i kept thinking that the little girl looked incredibly familiar, and then it hit me.  she looks like a miniature allison case.

change the hair color and she’s an absolute ringer.  

(i also got a smile out of her name reveal, just because it’s her cousin asking her how to spell it and she starts with m, and for whatever reason i’m like “oh wouldn’t it be funny if we had the same name,” and at the -o i’m like trying to guess, “maybe she’s morgan, or -”; -l  “...ha.  awesome.”  -l-y “well i’m glad they spelled it properly.”  dunno why that amused me, but it did.)

it - better than i thought it would be in some ways.  it’s not scary at all and the horror aspects are largely bungled, which is a shame because the dude playing pennywise is pretty creepy and could’ve done better stuff with a better script.  i hate the changes they made to beverly’s character, and she and the kid from book of henry were so obnoxiously precocious and precious.  that said, all the other kids were fantastic, including that kid i generally dislike from stranger things.  he was hilarious, and he and the rest of the pack of boys were so natural in their roles you just started to believe that’s who they were.  i’m vaguely looking forward to the sequel.

mammoth - a rewatch; it’s still the same infuriating mansplainy trash it was the first time around, but i wanted mom to see michelle williams’s performance, so.  the cast really is perfect; that’s the one thing it has going for it.

marwencol - this guy’s photography is amazing, and his story is super interesting, but what kept jumping out at me was how fucking great this dude’s coping mechanisms were, even if they looked a little odd.  for example, he has a crush on his married neighbor, so he added a doll based on her to his little village with the intent of having that doll marry the doll that’s his avatar.  the woman got weirded out, told him it wasn’t cool - so he dealt with the rejection by creating a sorceress character who blinked the neighbor character out of that universe and hooked it up with that guy’s character.  like...that’s the weirdest way i’ve ever seen someone handle rejection, but also kinda the healthiest.  he said repeatedly that he had no interesting in actually pursuing his neighbor romantically because he respected that she was married.  he never said a cruel word to her, or complained to the camera about her being a bitch or ungrateful or whatever dumb shit people come up with.  absolutely no threats or hints of violence.  just “i’m hurt by this rejection, so fuck it, i’m erasing her from this narrative.”  like...that’s honestly brilliant.  don’t know why this stuck with me more than anything else, but it did.  i know there’s a drama adaptation coming out soon with steve carell, and i expect that’ll be great.

maudie - i adore sally hawkins so much.  i haven’t seen the shape of water yet; i really only know her from paddington, but there’s just something about her that makes me like her.  and her performance in this is stellar.  i know nothing about maud lewis (besides the fact that i like her paintings) but sally hawkins was easy to fall in love with.  sweet, smart, shrewd, just a hell of a mind but also a huge heart.  

happy death day - i was NOT expecting to enjoy this as much as i did.  it’s really perfectly executed for the type of movie it is.  great comedy - one of the funniest onscreen kills i’ve ever seen - genuine danger and stakes (a rarity in groundhog day type movies), and a main character with actual depth; enough so that you actually care about her and want her to survive this movie (i don’t recognize the actress, but she does a great job with the role).  and a fucking fantastic red herring that totally caught me off-guard.  i was expecting something dumb, a carelessly written splatterfest aimed at the lowest common denominator.  (yeah i’m a horror snob fuck you.)  actually there’s very little blood/gore, which apparently bothered some viewers, but i don’t think any effect was minimized without it.  i had a ton of fun watching it.  didn’t expect that.

dunkirk - i’m just gonna say it.  it was bad.  i’m generally pretty neutral on war movies - for the most part they’re not my thing but there are plenty i’ve enjoyed and plenty i’ve been able to appreciate as good filmmaking even if the film itself wasn’t for me.  this movie is just not good.  generic war movie created around a truly amazing true story that could have been an amazing film.  wasted opportunity.

fagbug - i completely understand why the gay community had worse things to say about this person than heteros did.  ugh.  stop making actual tragedies about you, stop talking over people and stop acting like an epic victim.  

before i wake - surprisingly not bad, could’ve been better.  liked it better before the last few minutes.  it had some clever ideas and it was fun putting everything together, but having it put together for us takes the fun out of it, and making the kids’ “powers” unambiguous is a little...hard to swallow i guess?  but it’s still surprisingly pretty good.

under the arctic sky - random netflix generator told me to watch this and while cold water surfing isn’t something i’m super interested in, the photography is gorgeous.  i can’t pretend i didn’t cry like a little bitch watching the one guy surfing under the northern lights.  just...the world is just awesome.

original post url 

http://krokodile.tumblr.com/post/170571715555

[thelifeknight]

thinking abt how HS was always supposed to be about the journey and not about the ending

i think a big criticism of the end of HS is the predictability or generic qualities of the way the story wrapped up. but the way homestuck set itself and its villains up really meant that there was no unpredictable way andrew could reasonably end the comic without just killing the cast and letting lord english destroy all reality. like ok we have 4 main bad guys that need to go down, and 3 of them are nearly or completely invincible. caliborn destroyed the only way of permakilling a god tier, of COURSE he’s gonna have to just go in a black hole if we want any way of defeating him. i don’t think the story ever intended to provide any mystery for how they were going to take him down, they built up their methods for 1000 pages and went over the plan thoroughly. the excitement is seeing the culmination of the character arcs and the way they’ll use their powers.

my biggest issue with the end is not how the final battles went or the predictability, but rather how andrew chose to wrap up certain characters’ arcs but not others. like i said there was no way to end the story with any real surprises and i think all plot points got wrapped up nicely, but the characters were a great opportunity to throw some surprises at us. dave had a great moment confronting dirk with his traumas, and while it was really late into the comic for him to be going into his arc, it was at least complete. dirk similarly had the penultimate part of his arc come when he allowed dave to cut his head off, and it really cemented both striders as complete characters. i feel like jake and jane never had a real moment where their arcs culminated at the end. the last time i remembered them having any significant character moments was when they went god tier, because nearly everything after that was non-stop action and drama. all the crockercorp and aranea stuff didn’t technically happen to them, so any realizations they came to during that time were wiped clean.

alternate calliope kind of addresses this, telling jade that even if she doesn’t have memories of the doomed and alternate timelines, they all contributed to the alpha timeline, and she is the culmination of all possible jades and their experiences blah blah blah, but at the end of the day any character moments we saw in the original alpha timeline were wiped clean, and might even mean less than the doomed timelines in terms of significance. this is where i have another issue, i think jade understood what calliope told her and found peace, but her 3 years of pure loneliness must’ve been so horrible for her, and she doesn’t get nearly enough closure. she had feelings from age 13 that she kept inside her that whole time, and that’s so traumatizing for a teenager and must’ve stunted her maturation in some way or another.

and poor jane never got a proper reunion with her dad ;__; i know that the john-dad moment was supposed to be an important thing for john, but he barely ever talked about his dad, meanwhile jane and her dad had a VERY important connection and she spent so much time in the game looking for him! i mean, john barely blinked when he saw his dad’s dead body, and dad crocker didn’t see john as his son, he saw him as poppop crocker, and that just really sucks for both john and dad since they both had entirely different thoughts about that “reunion.” ugh that might be one of my biggest issues with the ending, poor jane got shafted in so many different ways and it irritates me because she is just as important as john and yet she gets forgotten by both the fanbase and the narrative.

basically it comes down to characters that got resolutions for their stories: john, roxy, rose, karkat, dave, dirk, kanaya, calliope (both of them), terezi, vriska

characters that didn’t: jade, jane, jake, even gamzee, all the ghosts ??? like do they just stop existing when the game is over? the sprites too?????

and this wouldn’t be a problem because like i said journey not ending, but so much of the journey is totally undermined by the ending. i don’t want jake’s last real moment in the comic to be him lamenting about how he can never form a proper relationship with someone and he ruins all the friendships he gets into by being a dumbass!! i don’t want dirk’s last real thoughts about jake to be about how badly their relationship and friendship got fucked up! i know we see them getting along later in act 7 and in the credits, but it’d be nice to understand how they began this reconciliation. aro jake is a perfect way to finish his arc but when he comes to this ““realization”” he doesn’t seem satisfied with it, he mostly seems to want to avoid relationships for the sake of not acting like a dumbass while in one. it doesn’t even come across as him being aro to me, he just seems upset that he can’t form real connections to people because of his isolated upbringing, so he wants to isolate himself even more. i guess dirk/jake is one of those things, like many aspects of HS, that are left purposely up to fans to decipher and interpret, but it still feels unrefined and makes the ending rushed. and the ending was rushed! andrew was sick of writing his own comic, and that’s fine, but it’s still fine to criticize it on that condition, no matter how he felt about wrapping it up.

i might add onto this post in a bit im still Processing and also trying to fact check myself lol it’s a long comic

[therez]

15 ‎juin ‎2020, 2300

Hey what's up hello. So as you don't know I finished my notebook the other day and my heart is broken because I loved it so damn much, it's so fun being able to just vomit my head on paper. Well, I guess from now on I'll just vomit my head on a keyboard and I guess it's not such a bad thing because I won't waste as much paper as I did before when I just printed everything... I have a lot to update you about because it's been so long since I wrote because I had nothing to write on (well, I thought I didn't). Anyhow, here I am on my computer, signing up to get retina cancer because I feel like getting my mind off my chest. So hello, in case my house burned down or in case you're too incompetent or just not curious or you just don't give a fuck or you just simply don't know me and you didn't get the prologue, my name is Linz, my friends don't call me Lili, first because it's a disgusting nickname and second because I don't have any friends. I was born in the east but I moved here very young so I just remember my time there in glances and it's probably just because I'm making myself create a scenario surrounding the pictures I was shown of those couple of years. So I grew up here, in the west beside the capital. And yeah I'm seventeen and couting, my prime is behind me and my best friend is my big sister MF. I've been with Ju, my boyfriend, for a little over two years and be surprised when I tell you I'm still a virgin and please tell me you're having major Gossip-Girl-Blair-and-Nate-throwback vibes; thank you. I'm a minimalist, eco-considerate, money-saver who likes reading and climbing and music and snowboarding and MCU (DC Comics take the back seat hun) and hamburgers and everything outdoors except running, en gros. Oh, and I really like Chris Evans: click off if you don't know who I'm talking about, seriously. Family-wise, the two sides of my bloodline are polar opposites and my mom's intense and my dad's silent and my sister's over it and I have one grandma left.

Now onto the actual updating of what's been going on. If you can read, one thing you do know is that it's summer now so college is cancelled for a few months until capitalism strikes again. My second semester was half online so the last part was kind of a joke for us science nerds except calcul intégral was a kick in the face. Right now I'm working with old people to help keep them alive whilst their remaining living days are numbered which is kind of counter-productive and useless because they'll die in a couple of months or weeks, if they're lucky enough. Ugh, us weak humans: we're inevitably all pussies when confronted with death or love. Or both. Therefore, I work nights at my region's center with a woman who constantly talks about threesoms and having sex on the hood of her car in the rain. It's odd but what makes it really weird and uncomfortable for everyone is that she's around forty-five years old. But appart from that, I really like my job, c'est relaxe et flexible and I even think that for once in my life, I'm kind of feeling a sense a purpose brewing inside of me, threatening to emerge. Tonight is my first off-day since I started this new job so it'll be interesting doing stuff at night that's not sleeping or watching porn. Last night it slapped me back in the face and it had been a while since it happened (probably because I was home, alone for a third of the year): I'm so fucking awkward, like an upsetting weird, a digging-my-nails-in-my-palms weird. I hate that I can't do the right thing en situation. And not even do the right thing, but just do something normal for once in your fucking life you dumb cow! Holy fuck Linz, you always feel the need to talk about youself even though the last time you did it you cried yourself to bed because you know you're behaving like a show-off because you're insecure. People don't need to know, keep it to yourself, your little secret. Ton jardin secret. Your life id unknown of, as it should be, just be a ghost, a memory, live your life unaccounted for so no one notices you, you won't have to please anyone. More importantly, you won't have to hate yourself because you deceive everyone in your life, because your best isn't enough. C'est récurrent: everytime the highs get higher but the lows get lower and longer. That's when my friend Melatonin comes in handy and my blanket is Harry Potter's Invisibility Cloak. I want to dissapear, to be invisible. Off-the-grid, take me over, help me make my mind-and-body homey. It's unfair how one little bad moment overweights all of the good ones, the month-long really good giggling-for-no-reason good ones.

All right, I'll try to talk you through my last month, starting with Sandy losing her virginity to her boyfriend de deux jours in the context of her two-week old relationship with this stranger, Félin. At least her and I have a two somewhere in our relationship description, but we're not totally on the same scale here. Whatever, she's unpredictable, she's the I-lived-in-three-different-countries-around-the-world-before-I-reached-eighteen, the I-lived-alone-in-an-appartment-at-seventeen, the I-have-a-perfect-body, the I-am-good-at-everything-I-do. How can I be mad at her, and how can I be jealous of her, it's unfair to her because I love her with all of my heart and she's the one with who I really clicked even though she was gone for three years and when she came back it was like she never left. When we're together, we're guaranteed a laugh, a fall, a dick talk, a fucking amazing time. We're good together, we get each other. At least, I thought we did. What's new Linz, once again, I don't know why I expect things to change and to be different with various people. It's getting old and to be honest, it's getting so ironic and quite hard to take this mess seriously. My life, i mean. But at the same time, how can I not be jealous of her. Just look at her and try not to be complexed. Three weeks ago she was complaining about how no one loves her because she doesn't have a boyfriend and how she'll end up alone and now, she has a movie relationship with this stranger, they're together 24/7 and what I'm about to say will strip my propos of its seriousness but it's not a joke: it's dicks before chicks for her. And that breaks my heart, completely, ça me déçoit tellement. Après toutes les choses qu'on s'est dites quand on étaient saoules dans la salle de bain de Claue assises par terre alors que les gens nous cherchaient, quand on marchait de son appartement jusqu'à l'arrêt d'autobus pour aller à Altitude, quand on était dans mon hammac en train de sip une Heineken alors qu'un monsieur random se crossait probablement en nous écoutant parler de dread locks et de graines. Don't tell me this meant nothing, don't pull a Claue on me after we discussed it saying it made no sense how she didn't give a single fuck about us, non-soccer girls after all those years of the perfect illusion. How deceitful, what a pity: always being the one who loves harder but lives duller. I didn't tell her because I didn't want to scare her, but I love her so so much and I think we're best friends. "Best friends" means so much to me, it is not an expression to be taken lightly I think and it's probably because in my life, I've had about seven best friends and as you can see, none of them lasted longer than two or three years (I'm realizing just now, saying that, that I'm probably the problem). Maybe I'm not meant to be with someone and let them in so close to me and in my head or maybe they back out when they see I'm fucked up beyond fixing or maybe just beyond understanding. I just want my people, just one of them, for the rest of my life.

Ju wiggeled himself out of the heavy talk I was kind of ready to have with him, so right now, he's the good thing happening. The ray of sunlight piercing through les nuages de tornade, comme on dit.

[pizzaplicity]

I wanna post my feelings but I don’t actually want anyone to read it so I’m going to post here.

I don’t even really know where to start. I’m just so fucking upset. I feel like I’m really alone like no matter who is in my life I can’t talk to anyone and it doesn’t even matter to talk because nothing will ever change and I will always feel this way. I don’t know what I’m doing. I just don’t want to exist anymore. I can’t stand it. The only thing that actually makes me happy isn’t something that is secure in my life. I feel like at any second he could disappear completely. I feel like it’s such a real possibility. They way he describes his emotions makes me feel like he could never really love me. How could he? I don’t understand what he wants from me. He is completely unpredictable. I don’t know what to believe he says all these things but honestly i have no idea what is going on in his mind. I thing he is totally capable of just leaving me. And I’ve based everything around him. Absolutely everything. Ugh. I’m not even a person anymore I’m nothing I haven’t been anything in years I don’t know what I’m doing anymore but oh my god I love him so fucking much. I really love him. I love him so much that sometimes it feels like the worst thing in the world. I don’t understand anything. I don’t know what to do. I wish i were dead. I wish I could change anything. But I can’t because I love him and this is just how it’s is i guess. This is just how it will always be. I’m sure I’ll read this in the morning and somehow hate myself more than i already do right now.

[airmidtheawakened]

Sharp, Pointy Things, Part 3

Welcome back to the clusterfuck! Now that I’ve had that drink I promised myself (well, several drinks. It’s been a bit) we can get back to what is probably one of the worst jobs my cabal as ever worked. We didn’t stay at the bar long; Abraham came to pick us up before the police got there. We all went back to his place, Dave in tow, to try and figure out just what the hell was going on.

I tried getting information out of Dave. He kept talking about wanted to talk to a “Matthew.” He said that “Matthew would fix this. Matthew would protect him.” Whoever this Matthew guy was seemed like he must have been in charge of the meth thing, and thus a good candidate for having offed Dead Big Bro. Here I was hoping this would just be a normal, mundane, non-supernatural druggie dispute. But then we saw a tattoo on Dave’s back that proved otherwise. It was some sort of insignia that belonged to a vampire… group, I guess? Some sort of social club or whatever.

At that point I was absolutely done. Fisher and Aces showed up, so I left the rest of the interrogation to them while I went outside for some air.

I felt so… so helpless. I’d worked my entire life to be the strong one. The one who works hard, takes care of herself, doesn’t need help from anyone. And all that meant jack when it came to keeping Saki safe. I should have been keeping a better eye on him. We should have stuck together.

Lipsy came out a few minutes later. I don’t like people seeing me when I’m upset. I tried to pull myself together but it didn’t work. I ended up sobbing into his shoulder for a good five minutes. It was nice. I mean the situation sucked, but having someone there for me when I’m an absolute wreck is something I wouldn’t trade for anything.

Of course the moment was ruined when Fisher came storming out of Abe’s shop, murder written all over his face, Aces and SiSi hot on his heels. Fisher took off in En’s car. Aces was shouting in our heads that he was gonna kill En. I was so confused. Before I knew it I was being dragged into Abe’s car, then we were speeding out of Quincey towards En’s place… Really the whole night was a blur after that. I’ll try to remember as best I can but we were all so caught up in everything going on that nothing really stuck, you know? Your brain can’t commit anything to memory if it doesn’t have time to actually process what’s going on.

We got to En’s place just after Fisher, who had our dear professor pinned against a wall and was shouting at him. Lipsy and I tried to get him off and failed miserably. I don’t know what spell he threw at us but it made our limbs stopped listening to our brains. SiSi seemed to know what was going on and told us to back off, but we just wanted to find Saki and the whole situation was NOT helping us find Saki. Aces was having a breakdown on the sidelines, I was shouting at Fisher, Lipsy was… you know what I don’t remember what Lipsy was doing. Probably still being discombobulated from whatever spell Fisher used to keep us off of him. And then somehow another lady showed up to take En away to the Consilium. I think Fisher summoned her out of a book? Like I said, it’s all kind of blurry.

It was at this point that Fisher agreed to help us look for Saki. Finally. So off we trot (well, drive, actually) to Dreamboat Vampire’s club because we’re convinced he knows who took Saki. Fisher explained what was going on with En on the way there. Here’s the cliffnotes version:

1. En was like, hot shit it his youth. A bonafide magical genius from a long line of magical badasses.

2. En got cocky and tried to become an archmage. A word which here means “force your way through the Abyss until you kick in the gates of the Supernal Realms and make reality your bitch.” The Consilium tried to forbid him from doing that cuz it’s suuuuuper dangerous but he went ahead and did it anyway. In a theater. With witnesses.

I’m going to take a moment here to ask why the fuck didn’t the Consilium actually stop him? Like, it’s gotta be within their power to do so. It’d be one thing if En did it in secret but COME ON. He made a damn spectacle of the thing! There were some serious levels of incompetence going on there, if you ask me.

(Also let’s just keep that little aside between us, okay? My master would have my head if he heard me talking like that. Who’s my master? You’ll find out soon enough, darlings, so sit tight.)

Anyways, cliffnotes:

3. Predictably, En fails. He becomes an magical monster fueled by Abyss and Hatred. Slaughters almost everyone in the theater. 80 people in total.

4. Unpredictably, the part of him that was still En beat back the Abyss and un-abominationed himself. Which has like, never happened in the history of magic ever. Color everyone who was not dead super surprised.

5. Instead of killing him for fucking up so hard, the Consilium decided to put En under house arrest instead. They assigned Fisher to be a glorified babysitter and make sure he didn’t fuck up any harder. Oh yeah, Fisher’s a sentinel by the way. That’s gonna be important later.

6. En spent his remaining days helping wee babby mages like me and my cabal find our place in the world, hoping to make up for all the people he killed.

Which brings us to Sam. That poor, vengeful, lost little soul who just wanted to find out what happened to his brother. See, En wanted to help the kid, but he couldn’t do so directly without violating the terms of his house arrest. So he went and made a psychic manifestation of Sam’s desire for vengeance so the kid could get results himself.

Talk about stupid.

So yeah, Sam was the one who killed his brother’s friend and attempted to kill Dave. At the tender young age of… eleven? Twelve? Whatever. He was in middle school at best, and sending a mental projection called an Esoteric to take the shape of his victims’ worst fears as it killed them.

 But we’ll get back to that later. We’ve got to finish up with the vampires first.

We weren’t sure how we’d get Dreamboat Vampire to talk to us again, let alone in a situation where we’d have the advantage. I volunteered to lure him out with my feminine wiles. SiSi and Lipsy weren’t too keen on the idea, but neither had anything better. So we’re sitting there for like… three or four minutes trying to hash this out when Fisher decides to make a suggestion. He gave us a token of parley that Sentinels use with other supernatural types. Lipsy asked why he didn’t suggest that to start. And what does Fisher say? What does he say?

That he wanted to see how far I’d go with my “slutty” routine.

What. A. Dick.

I responded by jamming my knee into his groin. Was it smart? No. No it wasn’t. But was it satisfying? Hell. Fucking. Yes.

While Fisher was on the ground nursing his injured manhood, SiSi and Lipsy and I made our way into the club. It was clear pretty early on that we weren’t getting past the bouncer – Dreamboat Vampire had told him we weren’t allowed upstairs. Fortunately, there’s one of us who doesn’t need permission to get from one place to another.

Edgar’s such a good doggo.

We decided it would be best if we skedaddled outside once we heard the screaming and barking coming from upstairs. After a few minutes, Dreamboat Vampire came down looking considerably unhappy but willing to parlay. He and Fisher exchanged the formalities and we showed him the picture from Dave’s back, telling him that we needed to find Matthew.

Oh, also, turns out Dreamboat Vampire totally wears these old silver-rimmed glasses to read. Ugh.

Anyway, long and the short of it is Dreamboat Vampire was willing to take us to Matthew, who he already had in custody. He was being kept under the same fucking club we were in the first night we went looking for answers. Matthew was about as freaky a dude as you might expect. He looked almost feral and acted the same way. We asked him about Sam’s brother and he told us the truth: he was the head of the meth ring and recruited this group of morons to help him push it. Turns out, Sam’s brother got a taste for the junk and Matthew went over to his place to straighten him out. The brother got enraged and charged him and Matthew grabbed the first thing he could to defend himself with.

And what was that thing, you ask? A barbecue fork. A fucking. Barbecue fork. So it turns out Sam was right: a vampire really did kill his brother. But these particular sharp, pointy things just so happened to be attached to something that anybody could have used. After the brother died and was bleeding all over the place, Matthew drank from him, I guess not to let things go to waste. We left, pretty disgusted, and Dreamboat Vampire told us that Matthew was going to be taken care of and that we were, under no circumstances, ever to go to his bar ever again.

So now we had two problems. Saki was still missing, but we also had to deal with Sam, who had all these really intense powers and was still trying to off all his brother’s friends. It turns out earlier while I was questioning Dave, SiSi and Lipsy talked to Abraham about the tarot card Saki left behind, asking if it was possible to use that card to track down the rest of the deck, which presumably would lead us to Saki. Abraham said that it conceivably could be possible: the card was one of a deck and the deck wanted to be together, so we might be able to trace it to the origin.

The problem became how to figure out what we needed to do to actually make that tracking possible. The deck wasn’t actually alive, but it wasn’t really dead either. To top it off, we had to figure out what we needed to do to locate the rest of the deck. After some trial and error, we came up with something that worked. So sit back for a second while I learn you a thing. When you start to understand the very basics of a certain arcana, you learn how to see the world in a way that filters other things out and just focuses on that particular form of magic. As you advance, you gain the ability to grant that sight to others. I was able to use my Spirit sight to see the spiritual energy of the cards, so then I had to grant that ability to SiSi. Once she had it (“This is really weird,” she said. Hmph.) she was able to use her Space magic to scry and figure out where the trail was leading. She figured out it was somewhere in Quincy, which meant Saki wasn’t too far away.

Pretty cool, huh?

Lipsy wanted to drop everything and go find Saki. He was really anxious the whole time about Saki – we all were, but he really was. The problem was it was getting really, really late and a couple of us had been without sleep for close to 48 hours at that point. As much as I wanted to go find Saki, I knew if it was a dangerous situation we had to be completely at the ready, and if we went in half-cocked, we might end up just making things worse. Lipsy didn’t really want to hear it, but eventually he agreed that we should get at least a little sleep before we try to find Saki.

We got back to En’s house, where Aces had managed to calm down a bit. She’d been doing some research herself and found out about how to deal with the Esoteric. The first thing we had to do was somehow get Sam to get near us and destroy this form of the Esoteric. Physical damage, like what I did to the mummy in the bar, would be totally fine. Then we had to knock Sam out before he could summon it again, and then we had one of two bad options.

The first option was to kill Sam. It was certainly the simpler option, but all three of us felt sick at doing it. No matter how much trouble he’d been causing, he was still a kid trying to avenge his brother’s death. The second, much more complicated option, was for us to enter a trance state and actually proceed through some magical realms. Once we did that, we’d be able to properly destroy the Esoteric and stop Sam from summoning it in the future.

I’ll be the first to admit I know jack about meditation. Even if I’ve done it several times by now I can never remember the way the astral realms work. We had to go like, three or four levels deep or something? To the collective dreaming consciousness of the world.  

At any rate, we were just completely spent and weren’t in any shape to go diving into it that night. Aces said that if we wanted to try the second option, the meditation room in the house would be the best spot to do it. That meant we had to lure Sam to En’s house no matter what, and then, because none of us felt like murdering a sixth grader, knock him out and try to banish the Esoteric, and then wake up and find Saki.

No problem. Noooooooooo problem.

We got a few fitful hours sleep and in the morning (Lipsy wanted this done fast – “We’re done with this by lunch and then we find Saki”) we decided to try and get it taken care of. I called Sam at the number we had for him. It took a few rings before someone picked up and I didn’t hear someone on the other end. I tried talking anyway and he asked me what I wanted. I told him that we had some information about who killed his brother and that we wanted to talk to him. He asked where we were and I told him En’s house. He hung up right away and we tried to get ready. We didn’t know what was going to happen.

Turns out, none of us could have quite prepared for it. About 15 minutes after the phone call, we heard the sound of breaking glass. But it wasn’t Sam. It was this tall, creepy dude with black, black hair, a white, white suit, and the blankest, creepiest expression I’d ever seen in my entire life. The same one Sisi saw raising a knife over an unconscious Saki when she was scrying in the sports bar. We’d met the Esoteric.

Lipsy sent Edgar after it, and because he’s a good Doggo, Edgar fucking demolished the stupid thing. He charged, sank his teeth into it, and before you know it the Esoteric went *poof!* and started fading back into the Astral Plane.

As he disappeared, however, the Esoteric turned to us and said something that chilled us all, “If you want your friend, come find me.” We didn’t know what to do – did he have Saki? Was he responsible for Saki disappearing? Was Saki dead and he knew where his body was? We didn’t know, but it made the knot in my stomach even tighter.

After we dispatched the Esoteric, we heard someone screaming, “NO! WHAT DID YOU DO?!” We turned and there was Sam. By this point, we’d all had our fill of that little shit, so we quickly turned to him and pinned him down. He was raging at us and let slip that he sent the Esoteric to kill Saki because he thought we were double-crossing him. He’d been following us the whole time we were trying to help him and thought that since we were meeting with the vampires and his brother’s friends that we were going to betray him. Saki could have been dead and it would have been his fault.

So the next part, I took particular pleasure in. I hit him in the head as hard as I could and used my Life magic to explode melatonin in his brain while I yelled, “Sleep!” It took a couple tries, but eventually worked. I got a little magic blowback – the universe doesn’t like it when you use obvious magic in front of Sleepers – but it was well worth it to knock out that stupid little twerp.

The only thing to do at this point was finish it: go meditate, find the Esoteric, and finish him off. But I’m starting to feel a little too sober right now, so if you don’t mind, I’m going to get another drink and then when I get back, we’ll finish this. Next time, you’ll find out just what happened to Saki, but I’m warning you: just like we weren’t happy when we found out, you’re not going to be happy either.

Airmid, out.

(I’d like to extend a heartfelt “Thank you!” to Saki’s player for helping me with the recaps for this chapter. Give him a hand, will you?)

[junker-town]

NCAA Bracket 2017: SB Nation’s bracketologist shares his thoughts

The Selection Committee continues to be consistently unpredictable.

I say that the NCAA Tournament Selection Committee is “consistently unpredictable” because the performance of my final projected bracket against the real thing is strikingly similar to last year’s.

In 2016, I correctly seeded 39 teams. One year later, that number sunk to ... 38. Last year, I placed 24 teams within one line of their actual seed. In 2017, that total remained the same. I even missed a No. 1 seed in each of the last two seasons — the Duke Blue Devils this year and the Michigan State Spartans last time. Oops. This year, I had more teams off by two seed lines or more — five compared to three — and four of those were off by a pair.

This time around, I missed just one at-large team, as the Selection Committee obviously didn’t care as much about the Kansas State Wildcats’ poor non-conference schedule, instead favoring their superior RPI and wins away from home when comparing them against a Syracuse Orange team that had plenty of quality wins, but lacked in those other two factors. Last year, I missed two. (Ugh, Tulsa.)

As for the bracket itself, there were some strange decisions made throughout. I’m going to go region-by-region with the things that stand out to me. Some of these are mere trivia, but others might help you out when you’re making your picks this week.

East

Unexpected “home” games

Why are the South Carolina Gamecocks playing in their home state as a seven seed? Bracketing rules technically allow it, as the protected seeds, those on the top four lines, are by rule prevented from being put at a home crowd disadvantage in the First Round only. The rule doesn’t apply to the Second.

All of 2017’s seven seeds were placed at geographically convenient sites, something the Selection Committee has aimed to improve over the past few years. Putting your top teams at a disadvantage early on isn’t ideal from a competitive standpoint.

The RPI ruled this year

The Wisconsin Badgers were one of the two teams I missed by two seed lines, and their RPI was probably a main reason why. Greg Gard’s team finished 36th in the metric, while a Minnesota Golden Gophers team the Badgers swept sat a full 16 spots higher. The Badgers are an 8, the Gophers a 5. That and the Kansas State/Syracuse decision are two of the biggest examples of how the much-debated metric seemed to influence things even more than usual this year.

One result of this decision is a potentially tantalizing Second Round matchup between Wisconsin and the defending National Champion Villanova Wildcats in Buffalo on Saturday.

Bracket nuggets

Even though I am a Florida alum and fan, their matchup with Southern Conference champion East Tennessee State concerns me. That pod in Orlando features what could be two of the most popular upset picks this year, as five seed Virginia will be tested by a UNC Wilmington team that returns most of the talent that pushed Duke hard in the First Round last season.

The USC Trojans and Providence Friars will meet for the second tournament in a row, but this time the winner in Dayton moves on to the First Round. Last season, the Friars won a 70-69 thriller in Raleigh. Wednesday’s winner will face sixth-seeded SMU in Tulsa on Friday.

Midwest

Geography makes it tough

While the South Region looks to be this year’s “bracket of death,” the geography of the Midwest and the many powerhouse programs within the region and neighboring states, like Kentucky, ensures the regional bracket will always feature several powerhouses with fan bases that can easily make it to regionals.

This time, it’s the Kansas Jayhawks, Louisville Cardinals and Purdue Boilermakers filling three of the top four spots, with Pac-12 interloper Oregon sitting in the other, probably due to Chris Boucher’s ACL tear. Then, just when the Jayhawks thought they wouldn’t have to face Michigan State Spartans for the first time since 2014, the Spartans lurk as their potential Second Round opponent on Sunday. Fun!

Michigan’s inspirational run for naught?

The Michigan Wolverines, like Duke, claimed their conference tournament by winning four games in four days, though the Big Ten champ’s story was a lot more harrowing. But those triumphs didn’t seem to matter all that much to the Committee. The Wolverines were another team I missed by two lines. I swapped them with then-five seed Wisconsin at the conclusion of the Big Ten final. (I had Michigan as a six at tip off.) And Duke’s four wins over ACC powers didn’t result in them jumping to the top line.

These examples are comforting, however, for those of us who think that regular season crowns should matter more than the crapshoot that is Championship Week. There are some times where you have to recognize consecutive great performances in exceptional and high-pressure situations. Still, it’s a lesson to keep close for next season.

South

The Eye Network region

You could call this the CBS Sports Classic Regional, since the top three seeds — the North Carolina Tar Heels, Kentucky Wildcats and UCLA Bruins — participate in the annual made-for-TV doubleheader. (Apologies, Ohio State). Not only did the Tar Heels and Wildcats meet in this season’s edition, with Kentucky winning a 103-100 thriller in Las Vegas, but the Bruins stunned the ‘Cats in Lexington. If all three teams, and four seed Butler, who swept Villanova during the regular season, if you forgot, make it to Memphis, that regional could be one of the most entertaining in years.

The bubble region

The majority of this season’s bubble storylines converged here. Not only do Kansas State and Wake Forest meet in Tuesday’s First Four, but two of the more intriguing mid-major conference champs that could have found themselves sweating today out find themselves here. The Missouri Valley champion Wichita State Shockers, a 10 seed, might have earned an at-large had they lost to the Illinois State Redbirds a week ago. However, the 12th-seeded Middle Tennessee Blue Raiders, who had one more Top 100 win than the Shockers, probably wouldn’t have. And since I have been fairly high on the Conference USA champs’ chances for weeks, they would have been a miss had they lost to Marshall Saturday night.

That won’t stop Middle from being another chic upset pick, particularly with Minnesota possibly being over-seeded by a line.

West

Northwestern gets in, finally

The Selection Committee sure made Wildcat fans wait, and there were plenty of jokes on Twitter about Northwestern being left out. But Chris Collins’s squad indeed made history, and they were rewarded with a matchup against a fellow academic powerhouse plugging away in a power conference, the Vanderbilt Commodores.

15 is the new magic number

Not only did the Commodores make history by becoming the first 15-loss team to earn an at-large, they were amazingly safe — as a nine seed! I would like to say that Vandy’s selection means non-conference scheduling matters, but then I see Kansas State in the bracket. At least the Committee rewarded Vanderbilt by bumping them up a couple of lines for running themselves through a November and December gauntlet.

A Big (East) injury contrast

Xavier, whose Big East quarterfinal win over Butler was just one of three over an opponent not named “DePaul“ since Edmond Sumner was injured, fell down to an 11 seed after going 6-7 without him, including a six-game skid. Creighton, however, ended up as a six, probably a line or two lower than expected while Maurice Watson was healthy (and not facing criminal charges). While the Jays went 7-8 without Watson, they never hit the skid the Musketeers did, and reaching the Big East final helped their case.

Gonzaga-Saint Mary’s IV?

Finally, we could have a rematch of the West Coast Conference Tournament final if Gonzaga and Saint Mary’s win three games. While in the not-too-distant past, teams from the same conference had to be separated until the Regional Finals, the NCAA’s revised principles and procedures only require conference rivals to be separated if they’re on the first four seed lines. Thanks to conference expansion, the number of times league mates play during the season determines when rematches can happen. Combine that with a desire to keep teams closer to home, and you might just find more possibilities like this in future brackets.

Thank you again for reading over the 2016-17 season. I’ll be back early this week with picks, so you know what not to do when making yours.