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#u could crush me in one hand but i want to just (claw grip starts vibrating)
fisheito · 9 months
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[heavy breathing] rei in his thigh high boots
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totiredtowrite · 2 years
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flipped pt 2
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Warnings - Cursing
Hey i was gone for like forever but here u are babes
PART 1 HERE
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What Sakusa didn't expect was the guilt.
He hated you, he always has. Why was it, then, that he felt so bad when he saw your uniform neatly folded on the bench?
Well, at the time, he didn't feel guilty. He actually breathed a sigh of relief, because you finally quit and he could stop dealing with you. You weren't showing up to practice anymore! You weren't greeting him in the mornings, walking to and from school with him, checking in on him. Hell, you hadn't texted once! It was like for the first time in years, he could stop suffocating around you.
The euphoria lasted two and a half weeks. Then he started to feel bad. He steeled himself for your greeting every morning, thinking that you would just show up again. After the first week and a half, it felt more like he was hoping to see you.
He chewed on the inside of his lip, casting a glance to where you had your head down at your desk. You'd barely glanced at him in the past week, ducking out of rooms as fast as possible to avoid him. He let his eyes trail over your frame less discreetly now, frowning under his mask. He'd never seen you sleep in class before; you were the model student. A small, small part of him was grateful that you were asleep. You looked peaceful- at ease.
His eyes softened at the soft rise and fall of your back, your hair messy around your head. His gaze hardened almost instantly, though, when one of your friends shook you awake. You blinked groggily, rubbing your eyes and running a hand through your hair to make it somewhat presentable. Sakusa's breath hitched in his throat. You smiled at your friend softly, starting some conversation that he couldn't much care about.
He didn't want to miss your companionship, if he could call it that, but he felt...odd. Now that it was gone. Like you should only be smiling at him, or texting him. He wished that you would at least tell him off. Glare at him, slap him, as long as you would just look at him. Somehow the avoidance felt worse than a much deserved slap to the face. He felt like a dick, to put it shortly. He was harsh, too harsh. You were sweet and caring and so fucking nice. Too nice for him. He felt a little selfish for missing you. Motoya and the others loved you. They were sad when you were gone. And he had driven you away- he had made you cry and quit the team.
He thought about it a lot. About how crushed you'd looked when he said "no." He hated you, he did, but the guilt was eating away at him. Should he have been nicer? What had you realistically done to him except make sure he was okay and greet him with a smile every morning? He lost sleep thinking about you. Why did he hate you in the first place? Was it because he didn't like guys? Truthfully, he didn't even know if he liked guys. Why had he said that? Why was he such an asshole to you for years when all you wanted was for him to be okay?
That should have stopped him from finding you after school. It should have stopped him from running after you and calling out your name, but it didn't. You froze in place, shoulders tense as he caught up to you, pulling his mask down around his chin. "What do you want, Sakusa," you said softly. Even with the bite of venom and hurt in your voice, you still sounded oddly angelic.
Sakusa didn't feel like himself, not at all, when he flung his arms around you and pulled you back into him. "Sakusa- what the fuck!" You clawed at his arms. "Let me go! What the fuck do you want?"
He buried his face in your neck, his dark curls tickling your cheek. "Please," he whispered softly, "please wait for me." You paused, your grip on his arm going slack. What was he trying to do now?
"You already rejected me Kiyoomi, you don't have to mess with me," you broke out of his grip, keeping your head down and walking faster. You felt like if you looked at him you would break and go crawling back, and your pride couldn't handle that.
"I'm sorry!" He yelled, causing you to stop in your tracks. "Please, (y/n), please don't leave!" You didn't move as he ran around to face you, grabbing your shoulders. You couldn't stop yourself from meeting his dark eyes, tears starting to well up in your own.
"Why are you doing this?" Your voice shook. You brought a hand up to rub away the tears in your eyes harshly, refusing to let yourself cry in front of him again. "Why can't you just leave me be?" He didn't say a word when you started to cry a little harder. "You can't just shoot me down like I mean nothing and then ask me to stay!" You sobbed into your hand, ignoring his grasp on your shoulders. It felt like his hands were burning through your clothes.
He opened his mouth, but stopped short. He didn't know. Why did he stop you? No, wait, he knew exactly why. "I'm sorry," he whispered, concluding that he really wasn't acting like himself. "I didn't realize just how much I needed you when I had you." His voice was soft. "I was scared, okay?" He tilted your chin up so that your watery eyes met his. "I was scared of you. I was scared of how close you were to me, of how much you cared about me. I convinced myself that I hated you for it, and I was a dick." He almost felt like crying himself.
You stared at him, dumbfounded, tears still dripping down your cheeks. "Please," he moved his face closer to yours, dropping his voice to a whisper. "I need you. I've always needed you." he cupped your face, tears pricking at the corner of his eyes. "I never should have rejected you." You grabbed one of his wrists, and for a second he feared that you would pull his hand away. That you would rip away from him and that he'd really lose you forever. To his surprise, you didn't.
"Why couldn't you have said that sooner," you whispered, frowning. He was about to answer, but decided against it. Instead, he put his forehead against yours and closed his eyes. You didn't pull away. Part of him wished you would, part of him felt like he didn't deserve to be this close to you. But you didn't. You stood there with him, forehead against forehead, your hands around his wrists, his hands cupping your cheeks.
He didn't deserve this. He didn't deserve you, but by some otherworldly grace, you stayed. He needed you all right, and he was determined to show you that.
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Hey bestie can u make a eren x reader one shot where eren just won’t let the reader move on🙃
thank u anon for this lovely idea
scumbag!eren x crybaby!fem!reader
WARNINGS: dubcon/noncon, past toxic relationship, slut-shaming, possessive behavior, yandere tendencies,
WC: 1.8k
He pins your wrists against the dingy bathroom tiles with an unrelenting grip, and you swear you've never felt more claustrophobic in your life.
The dark-haired boy eyes the glitter on your cheekbones, the neon-colored eyeliner, the rogue on your lips, and the black satin of your mini dress exposing a substantial amount of plush thighs. He's never seen you like this-never allowed you like this before.
You almost feel like uncharted territory but nothing escapes his observant nature. From the tremble of your lips, and the water starting to collect in your lower lash lines, Eren knows this you. Maybe not who you were pretending to be in the strappy heels, low neckline, and the party-girl masquerade you put on in front of your shallow ditzy friends, but he knows who you really are. Vulnerable. Scared of your own shadow.
"E-eren,' You stammer, "Please let me go." You try not to think about the voice cracks, trying to sound as assertive as you could without meeting his eyes. Eren, of course, thinks you look like a baby mouse. Hopeless and trapped.
"Don’t you miss me?" He mummers into the nape of your neck. You have an explosive No prepared in the roof of your mouth, ready to sound out the single syllable, until his hand, adorned with chunky silver rings, covers your mouth, muffling your whimpers. You could taste the metal.
“It’s a rhetorical question.” He’s smirking, green eyes lit up dangerously under the too-white bright lights, “Let me talk okay? I just want you to listen.”
All you’ve ever been doing is letting him walk and talk over you. And then when you finally got the nerve to stand up for yourself-
“I haven’t seen you the past three months” his low voice interrupts your contemplation, “It’s like you’ve been ignoring me.” He finishes flatly, his thin lips stretched into a line. His multitude of ear piercings catches the light, glinting sharply.
It’s too overpowering, his close proximity after going cold turkey. His presence is like a drag of a cigarette after not smoking for months. Hurts your lungs but the remnants of what you used to feel with the sudden rush of nicotine bubbling up again. Because when all is said and done, you’re still deliriously attracted to him. And you hate yourself for it.
You try to focus on the other sensations, sensations that aren’t busy on the feel of his warm breath or his hands holding yours down. You can still hear the song playing from the club.
All my bitches feel like I dodged the county
Fucking with you feel like jail n——-
Yeah, it really did.
Changing tactics, he holds you by your neck instead, giving your aching wrists sweet relief but that relief is nothing compared to the panic of having his beefy hand on your thrumming pulse.
His grasp wasn’t tight. You could breathe, but it was the kind of tight that let you know he would go tighter if you didn’t listen properly. React properly.
“You’re fucking ignoring me again” he’s practically growling the words out, baring all teeth, “I know I’m pretty difficult to tune out, so I would like to know what the fuck you’re thinking about.”
His hand leaves your delicate throat- his knee between your thighs keeps you in place- to roam down the satin of your dress, the fabric clinging to every curve. You hate how scrutinizing his viridian eyes are, feeling a wave of insecurity wash over the previous hot-girl-summer confidence.
He hated how good you looked on the dance floor, laughing with your stupid friends like you had lost all your inhibitions. Hated that you looked so good, everyone could see it. Hated how you didn't notice his eyes boring holes into you. Do you remember the time how you used to be hyper-focused around him? Aware of every movement, aware of every tonal shift?
And now you didn't even look at him.
"Are you thinking of other guys? I saw you grinding on those men like a slut." He presses his body deeper, "Have you fucked any other guys since we broke up? You must have. I know how slutty your pussy is"
You bite down on his hand. Hard.
You're counting on his reflexes, for him to retract his hand and give you an opportunity to run to the door. But Eren has been fighting for years and predicts your maneuver. With a calculated sidestep, Eren lets go of his hand, before promptly slamming you against the bathroom wall again but this time front-first.
Clouds dance in your vision, and you're sure you would have fallen by now if not for him holding you up. Eren uses this newfound position to his advantage by groping your ass, rutting his dick against your backside.
Deciding to be petty, you let the spite-coated venom escape your pretty lips, "Yeah. I fucked so many boys, and they were so much better than y-"
Anger blinded him. Roughly, he turned you around to face him once more, forcing you to look up at the green-eyed monster. He flipped your dress up, nearly ripping it during the process, shoved your lacy panty aside, and plunged his fingers inside. He felt a visceral sense of validation course through him at finding wetness coating his slender fingers to your utter mortification.
"Liar. I know you haven't been fucking anyone else." His smile is all teeth, pearly white and sharp,
You gulp, feeling sweat beading down your neck and arousal pooling at the bottom of your stomach. Damn yourself.
"You don't know that."
He looks almost feral, green eyes in slits and hair all mussed up, falling out of his usual bun. The top few buttons of his black button-up are left unfastened giving you a gracious view of his smooth muscular chest, and the dangling silver cross-chain.
"No, I do. See a little birdie told me all you've been doing the past few months is crying yourself to sleep, and eating frozen meals. This is the first time you've been out since I broke up with you, huh?" Condescension drips with every word.
He thumbs away the tear falling down your cheek with a mocking kindness and adds, "There, there. Don't cry. Good thing I happened to be here tonight, right?"
You're full-blown crying now, too upset to care if you're smudging your make-up. This is the real you. This is how Eren remembers you.
"Awe, my precious little crybaby, don't worry. You came here tonight looking for dick? I'll give it to you. It's okay," He coos, breath tickling the shell of your sensitive ears. Well, every part of you felt sensitive right now.
You're rubbing your eyes, sniffling, "E-exactly. You b-broke up with me, so why are you here? Why can't you just let me be?"
The dark-haired boy sighs, and with an uncharacteristic softness, leans his head down to press his forehead against yours, and intertwines his hand with yours, noses almost touching.
"To be honest, it was just to teach you a lesson." A soft exhale, "I didn't think you'd actually stay broken up with me." He's crushing your fingers now, "Didn't think we'd be broken up with for real."
Your eyes flash with indignation, feeling your body surge with an emotion you couldn't qualify, "I don't care. Yeah, I was sad but god, you were a terrible boyfriend! I'm so much better off without you. All those lonely nights are still better than any night I've ever had with you!"
You're breathless by the time you're done.
"Done with your little monologue?"*
You can feel your shoulders shaking, and you almost want to laugh from the indecorousness of it all. How could he not care? Was this how little you mattered to him?
"I know you're lying because" Without any preamble, he shoves his fingers inside of you again, finding that spongy spot that made your knees weak, eliciting a soft moan from your downturned mouth, "You're wet. And you want me."
"In fact," an edge of excitement colors his voice, "I bet your insides are still molded to fit my dick."
It's hard to talk when one thumb is violently brushing over your clit, and his tongue is forced into your mouth, drowning any whines of protests. You close your eyes, focusing and unfocusing. A hand snakes up your dress to fondle your tits and tease your perky nipples.
It's just one sensation over another, and your sex-deprived body was welcoming all these feelings with open arms. Eren knows your body like it came with an instruction manual and that manual advised him to bite your earlobe, which was especially sensitive. He knew where on your collarbone you liked to be marked, how hard you wanted your nipples pinched, and how you could ride his face with complete abandon.
But right now, he didn't want to pleasure you. He's coaxed enough orgasms out of you throughout your relationship.
He unbuckles his belt and frees his long slender cock, the head a flushed angry red, dribbling with precum. He lines his full-mast cock to your entrance. Fully alert as to what was about to happen, pretty pleas of "no Eren, please don't, no" are falling out of your mouth, wide starlit eyes dotted with pearlescent tears. He kisses the top of your head like the way he always used to.
And then he thrusts himself inside. You give up so easily, he thinks. Do you even realize how you're swinging your hips on your own accord? How you're wrapping your lush legs around his waist to pull him deeper?
His pace is ruthless, making your head bob up and down. Moans and grunts drown out the music from the club. You're begging him to slow down.
"You're mine. Always mine. Always were. Can't fucking believe you really thought-" He doesn't even finish his thought because a violent shudder rips throughout his body.
Your nails are digging into his back, so sharp it could have been clawed. You could feel yourself right on the edge-
The door shakes to reveal a tall young man with slicked-back blond hair with a frat-boy laugh.
"Holy shit! Eren?!"
fuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckcufkcufkcufckfuckfuckfuckfuc
Shame burns your face. You have no choice but to cover yourself behind Eren's broad frame. You're just hoping to every god he'll go away, and keep this to himself.
Your dark-haired ex-boyfriend turns around to face the blond, "A little busy here, Porco. Shut the door. I'm uh, getting reacquainted with someone."
"Goddamn. Is that ___" You don't even have to look at Porco to recognize how impressed he was.
"Get out Porco." Eren growls.
The door closes with a loud thud.
You're borderline hysterical at this point begging Eren to get out of you, but his grip on your hips is iron-tight.
Outside you hear stunned gasps, but one phrase stands out to your straining ears: "Yeah, I guess they're back together."
Eren kisses the top of your head once more, "After I fuck you, we'll go home together girlfriend."
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* {A/N}: This line "Done with your little monologue?" is inspired by this delicious fic by @hotwings0203.
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kafka-ish · 3 years
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the drunken words you spoke last night (1) | b.d.
one thing leads to another and before she knows it, y/n's longtime crush becomes a casual fuck.
word count: 2,893
warnings/included: nsfw (explicit smut -- male x female, pretty vanilla), fem!reader, angst(?), also a lot of this is written in italics cuz of flashbacks
a/n: sorry it's been so long since i've written anything!!
-
It was never supposed to end up like this. Just one quick fuck was all it was supposed to be; which lead to another one, then another one, then another one…
y/n watches as Bill scurries around the room, searching for his shirt. She’s noiseless and he doesn’t know she’s awake yet. He does a good job at being quiet, making sure not to disturb what he thinks is a sleeping y/n. The grey baseball tee he wore to her place last night turned out to be underneath her bed—how it got there was a different story. The silence is broken when Bill opens the door and is met with a large creaking sound.
Don’t look back, don’t look back, don’t look—
He regrets it immediately when he sees y/n, her back against her bedframe. She’s wide-eyed from watching him with such intent.
“Hu-hey.” Bill swallows the saliva gathering in the back of his throat. “I, uh, I didn’t nuh-know—”
“It’s fine.” y/n says her words with such ease and for a moment Bill’s jealous. He wants to know a life without speech therapy, a life without the nickname Stuttering Bill. And most of all, he wants to know a life without loving someone who won’t love you back.
“So, you’re not staying?” y/n does her best to conceal the insecurity in her voice but it’s hard. She doesn’t want to come off as needy or clingy, but she wants a response she already knows the answer to.
“I duh-didn’t want t-to wake you.” Bill shrugs as he says this. Half of it was true—he really didn’t want to wake y/n but seeing as she was already up his excuse fell flat.
“Right.” It takes everything for y/n to not roll her eyes as she replies through gritted teeth.
“So…” Bill’s left foot is digging into the carpet and his fingers find themselves intertwined together.
“So.” y/n herself is picking at loose strings from her worn-out comforter. Her eyes avert from their previous lock on his figure and she doesn’t know what to do with the lump in the back of her throat. She’s annoyed—no—furious.
It was never supposed to end up like this.
“Hey,” Bill answered the door in low-rise sweats and shirtless. “What’s u—”
He’s cut off and taken aback with a messy kiss. It’s bold, breathtaking, and smelled like vodka—nothing he’d ever expect from y/n. Once the shock had passed, he felt his eyes flutter shut and he became lax under her touch.
“I need you,” y/n mumbled helplessly in between kisses. Her fingers which had previously been confidently intertwined around his neck were now reaching for the ends of her shirt.
“W-Wait—what?” Bill’s still hazy from the blunt he smoked earlier and everything’s going so fast.
“You heard me.” Uh, not really. She pressed another kiss to his already swollen lips and the feeling of his skin on hers feels a hundred times better than what she imagined it to be. “Fuck.” Her hips press up to his, but Bill can’t revel in the delicious spark their jeans create every time her hips meet his.
The Denbrough’s front door is still open.
“y/n,” Bill spoke. He tried to say it firmly, but it came out as more of a breath than an assertion.
“Hmm?” The noises coming from her are downright pornographic, which only made Bill wonder what the rest of the night will be like.
“I have to shut the door,” he whispered. His breath tickled her neck and y/n felt her face grow hotter—if that was even possible. Reluctantly, y/n relieved Bill of her possessive grip so he could shut the door. But, immediately, he noticed he’s cold—freezing, even. But how can Bill be cold in the middle of July—Maine’s hottest month?
y/n’s quick to reassume her previous position—arms swung around his tanned neck, hips bucked up desperately to meet his.
“Wuh-we should take this somewhere more comfortable. Sh-shouldn’t we?” Bill only stuttered when he’s nervous now. It’s cute.
She pressed a quick kiss onto his jawline. If there weren’t remnants of her lipstick on his skin, he’d assume he was dreaming. “Okay,” she hummed into the spot her lips had just previously grazed over. Bill shivers.
He led the two of them up the stairs and into his room. The trip is slow. Bill’s careful to make sure y/n didn’t trip or snag her top on the railing. What a gentleman.
“Bill,” she whined.
That night, Bill decided his favorite sound was her voice calling his name. He’s always loved the sound of y/n’s voice and the way his name rolled off her tongue (“Bill, watch!” “Bill are you coming?”). But this was different. Tonight was different.
“Bill, I need you.” He turned to y/n who wore a pout as she followed Bill closely into his room. It’s pitch black but Bill doesn’t need to turn on a light to know his way around.
The back of y/n’s calves hit his bed with a light thump followed by another whimper.
“Shh,” Bill cooed into her hair…
y/n awoke that morning with her too-tight tank top and faded denim shorts replaced with one of Bill’s graphic tees that drape over her figure like a dress. She finds half of her eyeliner and lipstick-stained on Bill’s grey pillowcase and there’s an empty space next to her where Bill once lay.
“Fuck,” y/n whispered to herself. She can’t remember the events that happened last night, and the pounding in her head doesn’t make it any better. But the way the sheets around her creased and wrinkled, and the way her collarbone peaked out of Bill’s Led Zeppelin tee made her skin crawl and her stomach turn.
“Hey.”
Bill’s scratchy morning voice startled y/n. His perfect tall and slender figure slanted against the doorframe and y/n had to compose herself under his sheets the way she’s done all her life.
“Hi,” she swallowed thickly. Her breathing started to pick up along with her pulse and when did it get so hot in here?
“Do you want breakfast?” Bill made a motion towards the kitchen downstairs. “My parents aren’t home still. I guh-guess they’re still out.” Bill’s parents were always “out”.
y/n only nodded.
“Look, about last night—”
“Whatever happened last night, I can—”
“Did you mean it?” Bill cut her off, not even listening to the word vomit spilling from y/n’s splotchy lips.
“Mean what?” y/n’s ungroomed eyebrows furrowed together inquisitively because what the fuck? What on earth happened last night that could have left Bill Denbrough wondering for answers in the morning?
“Wuh-when you said that stuff about needing me.” From the flushed cheeks and timid words, y/n could tell Bill felt awkward saying to her what he’d just said.
Mortification took the form of y/n y/l/n that morning. The tiny hairs on her neck started to rise and goosebumps shot a trail down her forearms.
Bill crept forward after he didn’t receive a response. His face was only a few inches away from y/n’s. The swoosh of his I-just-woke-up hair framed his hairline like an auburn halo. To make matters worse, the morning sun shone directly on his skin, giving him a god-like glow.
“Did you?” His minty breath hit her face. Colgate.
Instead of watching his swimmingly blue eyes—swimming for answers, an indication, anything—she watched his lips. She admired how rosy they were even in the morning. She admired the curl of his cupid’s bow. She admired how soft they looked and felt as she bit the bullet and shoved herself forward to kiss him.
This kiss is different from last night. It’s daring, yet nervous; sweet, but awkward. It’s not the same as her desperate kisses from when she was wasted. This kiss is slow, thoughtful—
Bill pulled away. His breaths grew heavy, and his eyesight got hazy. The only thing he could think to do was go in for another kiss. So, he did. He’s quick to capture her bottom lip with his and cup her jawline in the palm of his hand.
Bill’s impatient now. His parents were gone, and he had a beautiful girl in his bed. What else was a teenage boy to do? In a flash of flesh, Bill’s shirt was gone.
“Do-do you want this?” He asked before he made the effort to remove any other articles of clothing and possibly embarrass himself further. Of course, Bill would be perfectly fine with getting off in the other room with just his bruised ego and bare chest to keep him company.
But y/n was fast to reply “yes” and press yet another kiss on Bill’s swollen lips. Their flesh pinned against each other’s elicited a feeling inside the two that both y/n and Bill had never felt before.
“You smell good,” Bill murmured against her shoulder. The words slipped out of his mouth like a hockey puck on ice. “I bet you taste even better.”
y/n grew flustered at the sudden statement. It wasn’t like Bill to confess something like that—at least not to her. Before another moan, like the ones from last night, could claw its way out of her throat, y/n caught Bill sliding the elastic of his grey sweats down his long legs.
He’s in his boxers. y/n could only catch glimpses of streaks of greens and yellows but didn’t get a chance to look at them for long as her attention was redirected to taking off her—Bill’s—shirt.
Although he knew it wasn’t gentlemanly, Bill could only stare at y/n’s bra-clad chest. It’s just black, simple, classic. But it hugged y/n’s figure effortlessly and contorted her shape perfectly.
“Bill?” y/n wondered aloud. His silence worried her, but she has nothing to worry about—she’s got Bill hooked like a fish.
Her meek words snapped Bill out of his trance, which allowed him to press another kiss onto her lips before he trailed down to her neck. Each graze of his lips turned her into a moaning mess. Bill wished he could say he was surprised, but he wasn’t, not from when he remembered the events from last night so vividly.
His lips lingered a little longer on a certain spot just above her collarbone that made y/n’s lips part so erotic-like, Bill thought he might cum at the sight.
But he wouldn’t allow himself to release just mere seconds in of making out with his dream girl—even if it pained him.
He released his lips from her skin, leaving a bruise. Bill chuckled to himself. At least, if he can’t have her, he can pretend he does for these few moments until she leaves for home and covers his mark with her trusty concealer.
Their lips clashed again. It was hard and rough—y/n’s more dominant than she let on and before either of them realized, she was on top: legs straddled Bill’s torso, nimble fingers gripped at his skin where a shirt used to be, and her lips viscously stained his red with what was left of her lipstick from last night.
Bill’s the one to moan this time. The sound was throaty and gruff, which sent shocks straight to y/n’s core. She bucked up, causing Bill to moan again and the cycle repeats.
“Fuck, y/n, I need you.” y/n liked this side of Bill: the bolder, dominant side; the speak-your-mind side. But most of all, y/n liked Bill.
She giggled at his words. She loved the way his voice cracked with desperation and the way his fingers began to clutch her skin tighter—like she was his.
The delicate sound of y/n’s voice only made Bill want her more. The tent in his boxers grew impossibly harder—a contradicting feeling of pain and desire at the same time.
“Please.” It wasn’t long until Bill’s groans turned into pleads. The rough palms of his hands coast across her bare skin, causing goosebumps to form and hair to raise. “Please.” The fast movements of y/n’s clothed clit on his plaid-covered dick matched the fast beats of y/n’s pounding heart.
Ba-dumb. Ba-dumb. Ba-dumb.
“Plu-“
“Tell me what you want,” Bill’s voice easily sliced through y/n’s pathetic whines, “using your words,” he instructed clearly.
“I wah—” Another whine. “I want you.”
At that, the rough pad of Bill’s thumb started to massage the sharp edge of y/n’s jaw. “I need you to be more specific, baby.”
Baby? Bill’s never called her that before. Actually, Bill’s never had a girl as beautiful as y/n on top of his lap before but here he was, the tent in his boxers being barely relieved by the girl by his dreams.
“I—” The sensation of the fabric against skin felt too much to bear but she wanted more. “I want your—your cock in me. Please.” She said this through lazy lips and heavy lids.
“F-f-fuck.” Bill groaned at the vulgarity of her words. Never in his life would he expect y/n to utter something as filthy as that. But never in his life would Bill Denbrough ever expect to be offered the chance to fuck her. “Okay, baby, hold on.” His calloused palm slowly slipped its way down from the slope of her jaw to her neck where fingerprints were left and then down to the clasp of her bra.
The damn thing. As hard as his hand grasped and as hard as his fingers twisted, the clip wouldn’t budge.
“Need some help?” y/n giggled, as she noticed Bill’s pained expression. Effortlessly, she unhooked the cursed contraption. It was as effortless as how the piece of fabric once made her look so perfect. But perfection didn’t change once the garment left her skin. Bill then realized that it wasn’t the strawberry-stained lips or the dramatic smokey eye or the tempting clothing that made y/n perfect. y/n was already perfect on her own; everything else was just a prop.
Bill’s once furrowed brows softened when y/n began to take the lead. His bare back pressed further into the mattress in the same motion y/n’s chest leaned into his.
Her crotch just barely brushed his and Bill couldn’t take the ‘almost there’ feeling anymore. “I hate these,” he bit. His hand swooped down to peel off the lacy string of fabric in one harsh motion.
“This is a little unfair, isn’t it?” y/n posed. Her eyebrow raised a little the way it always did when she asked a question. Her hands were cold when they made a trail down his chest and to his boxers. “Now we’re even,” she giggled when she finally released him from his confinements.
In an instant, Bill’s erection had slapped his stomach and y/n found herself near salivating at the sight. Her thumb just barely brushed the tip, letting out a hiss from Bill.
“Baby—”
“Shh…” Before Bill could get another word out through choked moans and deep breaths, y/n led his cock to her heat. Immediately, she let out a whine at the stretch of Bill which he chuckled at. “Bill..”
“Yes?” Bill couldn’t help but smirk at the fact that he was making her feel this way. He was the one whose name she was moaning. He was the one she was fucking.
“Bill…harder…” Her moans were like a record Bill would never get tired of hearing. His right hand moved to brush a stray strand of hair behind her ear before his fingers gripped her scalp while his left hand moved just below her butt, allowing him to thrust deeper.
Moans turned into whines and whines turned into screams as Bill set the pace faster and harder. Each thrust hit deeper each time, hitting a spot no boy had ever found before. “Bill, I’m—” But y/n’s words were cut off when Bill’s lips captured hers in a kiss. His hand still found itself tangled in her morning hair. His other hand still tightly gripped on her ass which would surely leave a bruise. His hips bucked up once more, leaving y/n in a moaning mess, unable to hold herself above him anymore. With shaky arms, y/n allowed herself to collapse on Bill’s chest. Their breaths mixed and their pants synced.
Tenaciously, Bill pressed a kiss upon y/n’s sweat-slicked forehead. The feeling of his lips was gentle and tickled as they dragged down to her cheekbone.
It was never supposed to end up like this, y/n could only think to herself now as she watched Bill walk out of her room and presumably out the front door. Of course, he’d be back the next night. Ever since their first drunken encounter with each other, casual sex had become second nature to y/n and Bill—like learning how to tie your shoes or riding your bike. But it was at this moment when y/n realized how she wanted more.
Hickies and torn shirts would never be enough to satisfy the aching need for something deeper; the feeling that made her stomach drop every time she caught Bill looking at her; the feeling that made her throat dry up every time she tried to speak to him outside of moans and cries; the feeling that made her heart skip a beat at the thought of him; the feeling of want—and only want—for Bill Denbrough.
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uncouth-the-fifth · 3 years
Note
not alot of jon love in these prompts so could u pretty pls do 214 w him and a soft catwoman reader? 🥺 maybe they're having a one night stand on a rooftop and they both kinda don't want it to end, even if they're enemies?
214. "Take it off slowly," with Jon Kent.
i just reread all of the unity saga, so you got me at the perfect time!! I'm obsessed w that one panel where Jon’s about to punch Zod in space... my king 👑 fuck it I'm putting it here
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You never imagined that Superman would be this soft.
Being called the Man of Steel, along with being literally invulnerable, implied that his skin was like metal. You imagined it was callousless, and impossibly, terrifyingly still, like any moment his grip could tighten and crush you into powder. That’s how the cellmates across from you in Arkham had described it. You personally doubted that Superman was this gentle with them.
In reality, his skin was smooth and his hands did have callouses, floating over your sides and squeezing your hips with heaps of control. With that much strength you figured it would be impossible to be gentle (it was impossible for you to touch a bubble without popping it, and to him, you must’ve been a frail one), and yet Superman was nothing but. His nails stroked gently at your thighs. His thumbs pressed into your belly. His hips rolled up into yours, his whole body coiled with pleasure. The only time you glimpsed even a little of his strength was when he pulled you back onto him, filling you up with a satisfied moan.
“Fuck,” you mewled. He was the biggest you’d ever been with.
For all his superspeed, you went slow. Superman was spread out beneath you, gauntlets thrown aside with your catsuit, his cape the only layer between your bodies and the concrete. You bounced in his lap like you had plenty to take out on him, which you did. This was the third time he’d stopped one of your heists. His little gift to you was letting you off easy instead of turning you in, but you knew he wouldn’t waste another opportunity to arrest you. This was the last straw. You may be stealing from the rich and giving to the poor, but all his stupid Kryptonian ears heard was stealing.
You hated him. A part of you truly did. But he was gorgeous and forgiving and sweet, sweeter than anyone had ever been to you, and you knew in your heart that he only fought you because of the law. You hated him, but he felt so good.
Scowling, you sunk your nails into the padding of his chest and dragged, dragged, dragged across that stupid symbol until you felt his bare abs clench. Even with your claws on, you couldn’t hurt him. He always joked that you treated him like a scratching pole, but there was this air to his voice that made you feel like he enjoyed it. Like maybe he even craved it.
Superman scooped up your hands in one of his and lifted, sitting up with your arms around his neck. Looking at him in the eye flushed your sensitive core with shame, but you still had your mask to hide behind. He didn’t. His cheeks were rosy and his lips were shiny from all the aggressive kissing you’d done. Sweetly, he sunk you deeper, rooting you to the base of his cock, and kissing you warmly. Superman tasted like cream chapstick and love. The third time his nose bumped the edge of your goggles, he swore.
You didn’t tell him you were close, but he knew anyway. Superman slowed, your limbs numb with adrenaline and lust, and tried to meet eyes with you behind your mask.
“W-wait,” he panted. Brave as ever, Superman gestured to your mask, “Take it... take it off. Slowly. I-I want to see your face.”
He’d seen it before. Still, you snapped back at him, “Why?”
“You get to see mine,” Superman soothed. His big, welcoming palm cupped your cheek, stroking your face like you were a precious treasure - not the thief stealing it instead. As the moment went on, you felt less like you were sitting in his lap and more like you were being hugged. Embraced.
“It doesn’t matter,” you replied, bitter, “we don’t even know each other’s names.”
Superman laid back on his hands, offended, and twisted his fingers in the cape you were using as a blanket. He looked at you like he knew this was going to be over soon, and both of you would be back to fighting any minute. He looked at you like that wasn’t what he wanted.
Softly, he said, “My name is Jon.”
Really? Jon is all you could come up with? You wanted to spit in his face. But he sat there like he’d pried open his chest for you to see his heart, like he was telling the truth - and as much as you hated him, you knew Superman never lied. 
His real name really was Jon.
When it hit you that Superman’s secret identity was now in your possession, you paused. The filthiness of fucking him like this drained out of you, first until you were hollow, then again until you were brimming with the compulsion to kiss him as wildly and romantically as you could. You hated him. But no one had ever treated you like this before.
In one pull, you slipped off your lenses and your cowl.
“...Y/N.”
Jon tested the name in his mouth. “Y/N, huh... I like that. It’s beautiful.”
You ignored him. Fisting your hands in his hair, you dragged him into a desperate, lasting kiss. Jon woke up for whatever daydream he was in and swooped his arms around your middle, groaning as you both started to move again. His throbbing cock rolled perfectly into your slick, filling your every ridge like it was meant for him, like you were meant for him. Supe—Jon, helped you on and off him, slanting your lips together in a starved dance. Your pussy ached more and more with every thrust. Even if this was faster than before, you felt your belly surge with butterflies. This wasn’t fucking. You were making love.
Soon, those butterflies were replaced with a hot, filling liquid. Jon parted from your lips to shudder and moan through his orgasm, spurred by your own. Every clench of your cunt drew more of him inside you. Once his cum flowed, it didn’t seem to stop, filling you the womb and brimming over until your lap was caked. It drooled from your pussy and hung from your thighs in sticky heaps. You clutched the trail of your orgasm as you held him - like you never wanted it to end.
Jon collapsed backwards, catching the breath he didn’t need spread out on his cape. You followed, your nose flooded with the smell of his sex, your cunt sobbing with his seed, and your cheek pressed to that stupid symbol. You touched it, shamefully enamored.
Tender as ever, Jon wrapped you up in his arms and squeezed you against him.
“Y/N,” he whispered, nuzzling your hair, “could we...?”
“Yeah,” you murmured, relaxing against his chest. “Yeah, Jon, we can...”
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rotshop · 3 years
Note
Heyo ✌🏻! ik know this request can be kinda wierd but...How would the madcom main trio + (anyone you'd like to add) react to a Half-dragon!reader who can actually transforms into a dragon when angry? thx! ~🦉anon
dw its not weird!!! /gen its a rlly neat idea and i am looking so intently,,,also i hope u dont mind i just went w/ tha main trio wyduesdc,,
theres a good title right here i promise
Hank
-this man is so so curious about you its insane. the amount of time you'll just be sitting down reading or watching something and he'll just. come up behind you and quietly ask permission before he jut like. traces your wings / horns really carefully
-he still wont ever like. FIGHT fight with you but he kinda likes to just see what you can do??? if you seem kinda clueless or lost in that field then he definitely tries to help (please consider ; his calloused hands over your own while he readjusts your grip on some weapon, the little pleased hum and quick compliment he gives when you get it right) you out. also if you ever kinda like. headbutt him or something bc of your horns during these he just laughs and its rlly nice :]
-messes with ur claws a lot too, whenever u guys hold hands its a guarantee that he's gonna fidget with them a little. he just thinks they are Neat. also he's like sheriff (/derogatory) in the way that he kinda blanks whenever he sees your sharp teeth. if you ever kind of. use them in fights against grunts or agents he just stares. it makes him go head empty no thoughts
-unfortunately it is VERY hard to carry him when flying so you don't really get that option unless ur pissed :[
-SPEAKING OF, whenever he sees you shift during missions or something he does his best to give you a little space so you don't have to worry abt accidentally hitting him. also he thinks you're fucking legendary with how you can rip and tear through enemies
-after the fights over tho he'll usually just kinda place his hands on either side of your face and lean his forehead against you to try and calm you back down
Deimos
-fire starter x fire starter what could go wrong!!! <33333 you breathe little huffs of smoke whenever you're upset and sometimes he'll just imitate you with his own smoke lmao
-also very very curious about all ur nonhuman features !! he likes messing with your wings a lot whenever you two cuddle and he'll just kinda. 'does this hurt / can you feel it???' as he messes w/ em. does the same thing with ur horns too (if urs are able to like. shed and regrow then mercy on him because he'll just be like. pulling on em a lil out of curiousity when its around shedding time and they'll just. snap off. you can see all the blood leave his face. IMMEDIATELY starts panicking and freaking out,,,pls reassure him you aren't in pain and that this is normal he's GOING To start crying if you dont)
-luckily for u!! it's a little easier for you to carry him around than with hank. really loves it when you do it even tho he was super scared at first you were gonna drop him. sometimes u'll just kinda be. flying home from a mission or sumn and he'll just fall asleep laying on ur back because he feels so at peace,,
-ur claws scare him a little bit tbh BUT,,he relates to the sharp teeth thing, you shake hands on it :] . but also he kind of. chuckles a little when you guys kiss sometimes because he's still not super used to someone other than him having sharp teeth like him
-n e ways!! whnever you shift he admittedly gets pretty nervous abt it,,he'll steer clear too just to be sure but the entire time he's fighting other agents his gaze keeps flicking over to you. he just!! really worries abt u :[ but also he is impressed by ur ability to turn agents to dust and stains in seconds it makes him go 'awooga' under his concerns lol
-whenever its over he always just come over to you and does that gentle little 'hey, hey' before holding ur face in his hands. most times it ends with you resting your head on his lap while he kinda. pets you and reassures you everythings alright and that ur both safe and fine until you feel properly calm enough to go back to ur normal form. he gets a little emo abt it because he genuinely does worry so much abt u pushing yourself too far or someone doing serious damage to you that you couldn't take if you were to shift back
Sanford
-he gets deimos' and sheriff's 'people who can crush me' thing a lot more after he meets you lol. like. at first you might not be super intimidating but after the first few times he sees you fight?? he's gone. done for. 110%.
-admires u all the time, you'll just be chilling or maybe you're talking to deimos about something and the entire time he's jut off to the side with a little smile on his face. if someone points it out to him he just kinda goes blank and gives some really weak excuse, awkwardly stuck between his normal tough facade and relaxing a little.
-you two are a fucking MENACE when you're put together on missions. you both clear through rooms way too fast its crazy, what the fuck is an agent supposed to do when some half-dragon is charging at it with bared teeth and claws while their boyfriend chokes out one of his co-workers while shooting another. what the fuck.
-also traces ur features a lot but he usually only really does it when he thinks ur asleep. he's a little too embarassed to ask if he can touch them when ur awake so he resigns to very carefully brushing his hands over your tail and horns. (if you have any scratches or dents in your horns though he totally asks about them and the stories behind em, he's just rlly curious abt you in general and like. who in their right mind would pass up an opportunity to hear abt their sick-ass dragon s/o about a possible fight they won???)
-but also he gets nervous whenever you shift too. he's afraid of you getting hurt or the possible emotional tolls that it has on you mentally and he brings it up to you sometime after the first few shifts he sees. he's just real concerned about you :[
-very similar to deimos in how he comforts you, he doesn't like leaving unless you've calmed back down, both because he wants to make sure there's no real wounds on you and because he doesn't wanna risk any other agents seeing you and trying their luck. if you're exhausted afterwards then he'll usually carry you, mumbles little words of assurance and praise to you while he does so
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Note
Okay for supernatural/demon lads and ghosthunting MC though.... imagine one of their haunted house sleepovers. The guys torn between scaring off the actual hauntings and *also* liking the way MC snuggles up close when spooky sounds and blips on her camera/sound equipment/etc happen.... Maybe a ouija board session at the witching hour where some narc ghost tries to warn her about three demons clinging to her >:Dc
WAAA omg. omg. omg this gave me an idea i had to-
“... The collapse of the roof in 1755 crushed 4 residents of the asylum.” You were deliberately using your spookiest voice, drained of all but the bare essentials of emotion to get the point across, flashlight in hand. “Since the accident they’ve cleared the damage and fixed the ceiling... but some say the spirits of those killed still wander the halls today, trapped not by rubble... but by the pain that binds their energy to this location.” 
You were still amazed at how steadily Skull could hold a camera. Whenever you looked through footage, even the stuff taken when he was walking, it was as if you had it on a professional electronic rig... you honestly had no idea what you’d do without him. It was pretty damn cold in the building, as it was completely derelict and abandoned, with no windows to furnishings to retain heat- only the concrete foundations remained.
“Visitors to the site have reported tapping on the walls, footsteps, shadows in the corridors, and the smell of brick dus-”
At the sound of tapping very nearby on the old plaster asylum wall, you spun around in shock, shining your flashlight...
... On Red, who was grinning like a bastard, rapping his phalanges on the wall.
“... s’pretty sturdy for an old ass wall.” He purred, pulling an ‘innocent’ face and putting his hand back in his pocket.
“hearing creaks and smelling dust in an old building.” Sans said, with his usual unbothered smile, like all this was just a bad haunted house attraction. “shocking. must be ghosts.”
“Oh, sure, act smug now, you’ll be apologising later when I get paranormal activity on camera.” You mumbled, deliberately shining the light into his face for a moment. You removed your spirit box from your pocket, ignoring the little joking vampire-like hissing sound he made.
The spirit box was your prized possession, your favourite method of communicating with spirits. It was a small black device that somewhat resembled an old walkie talkie; its purpose was to rapidly cycle between radio stations, producing static noise that ghosts could communicate directly with you through. It sounded sharp and horrible and always made the ugliest jittering sound, but even just holding it in your hands made you feel more and more excited.
“... I’ve got a device in my hand.” You said, addressing the room, the building... this was the part you never got over. The part where you spoke directly into the darkness that somehow seemed both smoggy and veil-thin, the part where you could almost feel the unseen eyes in the area turn to you. A shiver ran up your spine... you were certain that if you weren’t flanked by the comforting presences of Sans, Red and Skull, you’d chicken out before you could capture any video. “It’s going to play static that’ll allow you to communicate with us. If you want to, please speak, tell us what happened here.”
“geez. i hate this thing...
... You turned it on. Sans pulled a face, but didn’t make any of his usual complaints, which you appreciated. You stood there, waiting, all four of you staring at the device in your hand... it usually took a little while for something to come through so you weren’t expecting-
“ - - D E M O - N S -”
It blurted out of the box, clear as day, the clearest voice you’d ever heard coming from the box with only a slight jitter from the skipping. It sounded like a man. You jumped, your chest and your eyes widening- “Oh my God... I- what did it say? Did you say demons?”
“- E M O N S - - - I - N - -”
Your hands were shaking- he repeated it. Your full attention was on the box now, your heart was starting to pound. “There are demons here? In the building?”
“- YES-”
It was the same voice, giving you clear replies! This was huge! You couldn’t believe it! You were holding the box like it was a winning lottery ticket, just about losing your mind. “What’s your name? Tell me your name.”
“- -  PLE A S E -” 
You didn’t see the expressions on the guys’ faces. You didn’t notice Red and Sans slip away into the dark, too exhilarated to be expecting their usual cutthroat humour and cynicism.
"Where are the demons? Are they in the building? Can you tell me where they are?”
Something came through the box, but it was too mangled by the static, too impossible to make out. “What did you say? Say that again!”
“- W - - TH -” It was like something was interfering with the transmission. “W I T H - Y O U.”
... What?
“... With me?”
“ T H E - S K E L E T - ”
... It turned off.
...
Everything turned off. Your fully charged torch went dead, Skull’s torch went dead, the camera's lights blinked out. Suddenly, all the noise in the world had vanished... it was so, so deafeningly quiet...
... and the only light was Skull’s blood red iris, staring at you.
...
“... All the stuff just...” 
... You looked around the room, trying to see something in the murky darkness, as if searching the shadows for a reason for the sudden powercut to all your individual devices at once.
“... something wrong?” Skull asked. 
His voice was incredibly gentle.
... It was as if a cloud descended over your mind. Suddenly, just like that, you felt like you’d been plunged into a dream. Nothing seemed... real. You couldn’t think, you couldn’t process... a horrible wave of dizziness accompanied the cloud, creeping over you, prickling at your temples and muddying everything that was going in and out of your brain.
“I-I...” You stopped being able to feel your hands or your death grip on the useless flashlight. The pitch black room was beginning to spin, slowly... “I don’t...”
“hm?” 
“Where’s...” Your eyes were darting about. Pounding head, like it’d been stuffed full of cotton... your lips weighed too much, it was hard to speak. “Where... Sans... Red...?”
“... shh... it’s okay.” 
A big hand softly closed over yours. You knew Skull had big hands, that was something you loved about him... but the one that held you was huge. Your tiny appendage was swallowed whole by thick bones with long, cruel claws... it felt like him, but it didn’t... feel like him...
... What’s going on? Where am I?
... The hand gently led you closer, easily moving you like you were little more than a confused child. His eyelight was in view... his huge, red eyelight... your own eyes were stinging, strained, wide and afraid. The other hand moved close to you but you didn’t even have the presence of mind to flinch as it gently brushed hair out of your face... you just stared up into the eyelight.
He had horns. Skull’s silhouette had huge, curved horns.
“it’s alright.” He murmured, cupping you like a precious baby bird. His voice had become distorted, warped... and even in your state of delirium, you were certain it wasn’t from the headache. “you’re with me. you can let go.” 
The dizziness was becoming too much to bear. You couldn’t even focus on his iris anymore, you couldn’t see, you were either going to pass out or be sick. The distant sound of your flashlight hitting the floor... You pressed your eyes shut to relieve the aching, and tried to say something, but it was just a bleary mumble...
“that’s it.” He purred, the hand holding yours instead moving to your back to support your swaying body. You couldn’t open your eyes again... you didn’t want to. It felt so much nicer closed, the discomfort was muffled. “don’t need fight. none of this... ever happened.”
... You were vaguely aware of him catching your tipping body and scooping you up into his arms before everything went completely dark.
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leviaju · 4 years
Text
forgiveness
pairing: belphegor x GN! reader, hints of everyone x reader
words: 8.1k+
genre: angst, fluff at the beginning and a bit at the end if u squint
warnings: mentions of mc and lilith’s death, foul language
preview: “I’m sorry,” He begins, voice much weaker than anticipated. “I know that will never cut it, and it will never be enough, but I’m sorry.” 
“You’re right, Belphegor. It won’t cut it.”
hey guys what up. so... i’ve done a lot of thinking about belphegor’s dynamic with MC, and, like many others, was really bothered by the sudden switch after... he killed them. u know. typical stuff. i wanted to fill in the gaps!!! if im being completely honest, this has sat in my wips for.... like half a year. it’s my first time writing for obey me, so i hope that everyone’s not too terribly ooc LOL
anyways yeah. i mention how belphegor killed mc a couple of times, so proceed with caution! hopefully, if i get any ideas, the next stuff i write will be a lot lighter. hope you enjoy! (also requests r open soooooooo)
The weight on your chest crushed your rib cage, threatening to snap your bones like they were nothing more than twigs. All you could see was the pitch black of eternal night, and whether your eyes were opened or closed you couldn’t tell. What commanded your attention was the searing pain in your lungs, growing exponentially every half-second, and the unrelenting grip that was slowly shattering your esophagus. No matter how hard you struggled, squirmed and fought against the weight holding your body down, there was no use. It was pointless. The pain spread from the raging fire in your lungs to the tips of your fingertips, and everywhere felt as if you had been set aflame. Slowly, a light illuminated the force keeping you down. 
You couldn’t make out much, save for the cackle that rang insufferably through your ears, and the intense eyes that were staring you down. 
They held no remorse. 
-
Bones ache as you rest against your bed, finally allowing the tension in your muscles to melt away. You’d never mistake this feeling for regret of a busy day, having spent so much time with the people you care about, but it certainly took its toll on you. 
It began with Satan, who’d asked you the night before to accompany him on an early morning walk. It wasn’t an uncommon occurrence — he’d invite you to join his morning routine on every day off, and you’d never refuse — hence, at the wonderful time of 7:00am, you were venturing around the Devildom, hand in hand with the Avatar of Wrath. The two of you would walk, occasionally resting on a park bench for longer than either of you would like to admit, for about an hour and a half before you took an official break. The time was filled with pleasant chatter and comfortable silence. Every so often he’d squeeze your hand, and when you’d look over, the fondest of smiles crossed his face. It was a reminder of how glad he was that you joined him. 
At around 8:30, he took you into a café for breakfast, and two of you spent only about thirty minutes there chattering away happily. For the most part, he was vividly and excitedly discussing a book he’d just finished the night before…
Until you were interrupted.
“Hello, lovely!” Asmodeus wrapped his arms around you from behind, just before pressing a kiss on your cheek. Satan sighed, resting his head in his hand as he watched the interaction. 
“My selfish older brother’s been hogging you all morning, I couldn’t help but want to whisk you away!”
Despite the glare Satan was sending his way, Asmodeus took a seat next to you, happily engaging in conversation as he completely ignored his brother. He told you that the mall was opening in about an hour, and Asmo desperately wished to get his perfectly-manicured hands on a new makeup product being revealed that day. 
“But of course I can’t go alone! How positively dreary that would be.” His fingers twined with yours as he looked at you hopefully, and you ran your thumb across his hand. A sheepish smile crept its way onto your lips, and you looked over at Satan. He simply nodded, flicking his hand as a gesture for you two to leave, and Asmodeus didn’t hesitate. He was quick to stand and pull you with them, holding tight to you as he whisked you away. You called out to Satan, now alone at the table with a reluctant smile on his face as he waved goodbye. 
“Thanks for breakfast! Get home safe!”
You almost missed the chuckle that left his lips, the café door closing behind you. 
Asmodeus kept you until noon. He got a hold of the lipstick he wanted almost right away, but insisted on buying an outfit to match the colour. Regardless of what you’d initially thought, the outfit wasn’t for him.
“Oh, we’ll look positively stunning together!” He exclaimed after about two hours of forcing you in and out of changing rooms, putting his hands all over you to “adjust the clothing” as he deemed necessary. Near the end, you could feel soreness deep in your muscles creeping in from such an active morning, but Asmodeus’ cheery face and constant flirtations helped you forget about it almost completely. 
It wasn’t until you got home that you truly felt the effects of on-and-off walking since early in the morning. Be that as it may, your stomach was growling, loudly reminding you that it was now past lunch. As much as you wished to give up on food for the time being and instead head to your room to collapse, the pain in your belly was enough to urge you to cease any arguments, instead ready to try and ignore the ache in your bones in order to quell the angry rumbling of your stomach. 
Unfortunately, when you finally made it to the kitchen, there was no food prepared. Instead, what you found was a dejected Beelzebub, frowning softly as he once again was at the receiving end of a lecture from the eldest of his brothers. As quiet as possible, you snuck into the kitchen, trying to listen in on their conversation. 
There was silence, followed by a sigh. 
“It’s easier to simply ask what’s going on as opposed to trying to eavesdrop, MC.”
You jumped, then bashfully made your way into the kitchen, a sheepish grin on your face. Lucifer was rubbing his temple. 
“Beelzebub was supposed to be on lunch duty, but ended up ‘taste-testing’ to the extent that he ate it all. Again.” Lucifer sighed. The typically perfect eldest brother was being run ragged, if the bags forming under his eyes told you anything. “So, instead of working on the papers I have to get finished for tonight, I’m stuck making lunch while he cleans up.”
Beelzebub’s frown tugged at your heartstrings, and in spite of the exhaustion clawing relentlessly at your bones, you relented. 
“Why don’t I help? Four hands are better than two,” you proposed, and a small smile graced Lucifer’s face. He lifted his hand to brush the disheveled black hair out of his face, and your chest ached just a bit at the sight. You made a mental note to drag him to bed for a nap the next time you saw him like this.
“That would be more than welcome. Please, if you may.” Already you turned to start working, but Lucifer’s voice made you pause. 
“But no feeding Beel. He’s eaten more than his fill already, he can wait until we’re all done.”
Needless to say, every so often you’d slip Beelzebub a piece of chopped vegetable or cooked meat, and he’d very happily (but quietly!) munch away, his expression radiating warmth and joy. And Lucifer, who seemed to almost be omniscient at times, never once mentioned it. Once the three of you were done cooking, Lucifer placed his hand on your head, patting you gently. 
“Good work, MC. I must leave now, but I trust that the two of you will be able to clean everything up. Your help was much appreciated. You will be paid back in kind for all of your hard work.”
If nothing else, the slight blush on Lucifer’s face as he ever-so-gently pressed his lips to the crown of your head was more than enough payment. 
“Thank you.” Beelzebub cleared his throat, washing the dishes as you dried them. “I… Thanks for helping. And feeding me.”
His smile warmed your heart, and you nodded, bumping your arm with his gently. The small bit of pink that dusted his cheeks compelled you to coddle him, but you resisted the urge. Barely.
“Anytime, big guy.”
After you ate lunch, the only thought in your mind was the prospect of curling up under your covers and passing out. The fretful, broken sleep the night before wasn’t helping at all in keeping you awake, and that on top of the rest of the day’s events had you yearning for the feeling of your pillows. 
Unfortunately, you hadn’t even made it through the door when your phone began to blow up, one notification after the other in quick succession.
GGKKJFLFJG
MC
CMOE QUIC K
PLS
SUPE R RARE EVENT IN MONONONOKE 
PELASE 
YOU HVE TO BE PARTNERED WIHT SOMEONE TO GTE THE PRIZE
MC
MC
PL E A S E
HURRYHURRYHURRYHURRYHURRYHHHUUURRRRRYYYYYYYYYYY
You found yourself in Leviathan’s room, sat in his lap as he explained the event to you. Your half-asleep brain did its best to keep up with his quick speech, but that, along with the warmth of his chest against your back, became the most soothing lullaby. 
“Hey! Normie! I agreed to let you sit here so I could easily help you through the event, but if you’re going to fall asleep on me, I’m pushing you off—“
“I’m awake! I’m awake. 
...Now, what was I supposed to do?”
The unintentional giggle that escaped your lips at his expression caused Leviathan to huff, exasperated, despite the flush of his face. Diligently, however, he thoroughly explained the event, for the second time, and the method to obtain the rare prize: a level 2000 I’m Going To Murder You So Hard That You’ll Come Back To Life Just To Die Again Death Sycthe, the strongest weapon ever released in the game. It was a partner event, which explained Leviathan’s desperate and urgent request for aid. You didn’t mind though. While yes, you’d probably never be able to get to his level of gamer, you were more than happy to go along for the ride. It made him happy! 
Leviathan rested his chin against your shoulder as he played on his phone, focused to such a degree that the usually easy-to-fluster demon was completely unphased by your proximity. Your phone, set to AutoFight, rested untouched near Leviathan’s leg, abandoned on the floor. You watched him expertly take out enemies that would have one-hit KO’d you through heavy eyelids, and every time he beat a wave of enemies, his attention would momentarily avert from the screen, looking at you from the corner of his eye expectantly. A kiss on his cheek was more than enough to motivate him to continue on, albeit with a pink glow on his cheeks until his attention was once again completely wrapped up in the game at his fingertips. 
-
“Levi! I said open up, goddamnit!” 
The pounding against the door was enough to distract Leviathan from his game, subsequently killing his character in the process. He groaned, cursing the demon who interrupted the two of you as he gently lifted you off of his lap, before getting up to open the door. 
“The hell do you want?!”
To be completely honest, you were so wrapped up in watching Leviathan play his games that you had forgotten about your weekly movie night with Mammon, who had come over to his younger brother’s room to drag your ungrateful ass  back to your own. Leviathan had cleared the event in Mononoke Land hours ago, but not wanting you to leave just yet, invited you to keep watching him play. Setting aside how tired you were, how could you say no? You’d wanted to spend time with him, too. 
Unfortunately, you lost track of time, and your phone, battery completely drained from the event, rested uselessly in your pocket. A consequence of this happened to be missing the countless messages and calls Mammon had sent your way, before he began his hunt for you throughout the house. The last place he checked was, of course, Leviathan’s room.
“Come on, human, I ain’t got all day. No one keeps the Great Mammon waiting!” 
“Except for MC,” you heard Leviathan mumble under his breath, and a laugh escaped you before you had the chance to slap a hand over your mouth. Mammon flushed deeply, before striding into his brother’s room. 
“Hey, wait, you moron! I never said—!” 
The force of Mammon throwing you over your shoulder wasn’t enough to hurt, but it certainly was enough to leave you breathless for a moment. “Let’s go, fragile human. I picked the perfect movie already.” Mammon’s words came out in a bashful mumble, but he had enough courage to lift his head and smirk at Leviathan as he carried you out of the room. All you could do was smile apologetically at the blue haired demon before Mammon turned, bringing you out of sight. 
Mammon was all complaints as he carried you to your bedroom, but you knew it came from a place of love. Even though he’d never admit it, you could tell he was hurt by you unintentionally ignoring him. Because of this, instead of demanding he let you down, you allowed him to hold you like this, not a single complaint leaving your lips. 
When he brought you to your room, you were set on the bed you’d missed dearly and he went to put the movie in the player. 
“Hey! No sleepin’ on me, alright? I wanna watch the movie with ya, and I can’t if you’re passed out, now can I?” 
And so here you are now, bed frame creaking as Mammon climbs onto the mattress. Rubbing your eyes, you nod, and lean into him once he gets close enough for you to. 
“Seriously, I’m gonna hafta have a serious talk with Levi,” Mammon grumbles, slipping his arm around your waist and pulling you in so that you’re almost in his lap. He pulls the blankets over the two of you as you rest your head on his chest, and hum quietly in return. “He used up all your energy, and now we won’t be able to get to enjoy the movie as much! Honestly…”
The vibrations of Mammon’s words can be felt through his chest, and you simply cuddle into him more and try to train your bleary eyes on the television screen. The Avatar of Greed shuts up completely when you take his hand in yours and press a gentle kiss to it, before doing your best to focus on the movie. As time passes, however, the idea of giving into your whims grows more than tempting, and oh-so-easy for you to do. 
-
“Hey! Yo, MC! Seriously… You’re hopeless.”
A chiding, yet gentle voice draws you from the confines of rest. You puff air from your nose in response, cuddling closer to whatever it was that had been so comfortable in the first place.
“MC… Come on. Ya gotta wake up, ya didn’t even watch any of the movie! It was really good, y’know.”
Mammon’s hand rubs circles on your back as you mumble incoherently, a noise to acknowledge the fact that he‘s been talking, and that you are indeed awake now. 
It takes a good amount of time, as well as some gentle encouragement from Mammon, to get you to finally open your heavy eyes, and even longer for you to be able to apologize to him for missing out on the movie he was so excited to watch. He pouts a bit, but the blush on the highs of his cheeks lets you know that he didn’t mind all that much. You smile and yawn, and his chuckle resonates in your ears. 
“I gotta go now, otherwise Lucifer’s gonna kill me for staying so late. Sorry I woke ya up, but ya look so tired now that you’ll probably fall back asleep right away.”
And so, after a quick goodbye and a kiss on the cheek (which made Mammon turn the prettiest shade of red), you close your door and… sigh. If you had been able to stay asleep, the fact that you aren’t in pajamas and haven't brushed your teeth wouldn't be that much of an issue. Now that you‘re slightly more conscious, however, it’s hard to convince yourself to simply climb back into bed. Your breath is bugging you a bit, and the jeans you’re wearing certainly aren’t at all as comfortable as your pajama pants.  For that reason, to your own dismay, you begin getting ready for bed — properly this time. 
A small “finally…” tumbles from your lips after you finish your nighttime routine. Lacking any form of grace, you plop into bed once more and pull the blankets to your chin, nuzzling into the pillow. Your bed still smells like Mammon’s cologne, and you hum softly to yourself before closing your eyes and waiting for sleep to take over once more, and hold you hostage until late in the morning. 
Alas, sleep seemed to be evading you now, similar to how you had ignored it during the day. The mattress you lay on simply isn't comfortable anymore, and the blankets that hug your body cause you to overheat. Unfortunately, if even one limb is out of the blanket, you get so cold you start shivering. None of your typical sleeping positions are anywhere near as effective as they typically are, and you’re left to wrestle with sleep alone, hoping to beat it into submission so you can finally get some proper rest. 
After about 45 minutes of tossing and turning with no results, you finally relent. The nap you’d taken while watching the movie royally fucked you over, and you groan. Eventually you decide to give up on trying to fall back asleep, and huff as you sit properly on your bed. 
Blanket dragging behind you as it drapes from your shoulders, you slowly make your way through the silent hallways of the House of Lamentation. The only sounds floating through the walls were the light buzz of electricity running through the wiring of the house, and your own footsteps as you began walking up one of the many staircases in the large building. 
You aren’t sure how long you’ve been walking, the passage of time different at night to a hazy mind, but eventually you arrive at your favourite area in the house, second only to your lush bedroom. There are no artificial lights, only the gentle cast of the night sky providing the ideas of shape in the planetarium. You’ve never seen stars so vibrant and bright, and there are so many more in the Devildom than anywhere you could go back home. Even though the only light comes from the stars, it’s enough to create soft, fuzzy edges around everything in the room; this includes the bundle of various blankets mussed in the centre of the floor. Slowly, cautiously, you make your way towards the pile. 
Since you’d arrived in the Devildom, the planetarium at the top of the House of Lamentation became your safe haven. Your room, without a lock on the door, was way too easy for intruding demons to enter without permission, and on nights when everything became too much for you to handle, you’d head up to the planetarium to clear your mind. There’s just something so calming about a starry sky on a clear night that releases you of your fears and anxiety, and helps you get a grip on the situation around you. 
After freeing a certain someone from their attic-based captivity, however, you learned that the planetarium was a place favored not only by you. Since he’d been freed, you’d been kind, but there were still fears plaguing your mind, reminding you of everything that has transpired between the two of you. It’s something that you can’t escape, following you even - especially - in your sleep, when you wished you’d be the most at peace. It makes sense, considering the sin he embodies, but you wish it wasn’t like that nonetheless. 
Once you’d learned that this was one of his favourite rooms in the house, especially on nights when he can’t fall asleep, you found yourself avoiding this area. It’s not that you hate him; it’s the opposite, really. Nevertheless, you can’t help but feel the tightening of his fingers around your neck, and the burning sensation in your lungs that’s screaming for oxygen, and the desperation to alleviate the seer of deprivation. 
Still, you trek on. Closer and closer to the pile of blankets, your gut cries to you to run away. You ignore it. The nearer you get to the nest of blankets, the faster your heart beats, the more lightheaded you feel. But you continue. 
Eventually you get close enough to make out the shape of a familiar pillow, the cow print on the case worn and well-loved. From the moment you walked in the room, you knew he was here. All the same, you walk on, and the only sounds in the room are the gentle taps of your clothed feet against the tile, and the quiet noises of your quickened breaths.
You’ve avoided being alone with him since… Since you… Since the event. Your heart screamed at you to forgive him, to love him just as much as you love his brothers. That said, there’s nothing in you that can stop your stomach from churning whenever he gets too close. 
Butterflies beat aggressively within your heart and stomach, and it’s years before you get within his range of sight, but you sit down on the floor, holding the blanket tight to your body. 
There’s one beat, 
two beats,
three beats of silence before you can hear him sucking in a breath through his teeth. In your peripheral you can see his lips parting, closing, parting again as he tries to find the words. He heard you walk in, and was pleasantly surprised when you didn’t immediately bolt in the opposite direction. However, this proximity leaves him with an entirely new predicament. He wants to talk to you, he wants to laugh and joke with you the way his brothers do, but one look at your face and he notices the dark bags under your eyes, and the frown that tugs at your lips as you stare up at the stars. He can hear your heart racing, and feel his own in the tips of his fingers. He opens his mouth again, but the crack in his voice betrays his usual collected personality. 
“I’ll go,” Belphegor begins, begrudgingly starting to gather his blankets. His body freezes when his eyes pass over your figure and you’re looking right at him, through him, and he swears he can feel the blood in his veins stop pumping. Your expression is unreadable, almost scary, and he’s never in his life been in fear of a human until this moment. 
The seconds pass as years do, both of your bodies chilled to the bone but neither of you able to look away. In the end, the one who casts their gaze somewhere else is you, and he exhales loudly. 
“Don’t.”
Your reply is simple, but he’s stuck in place. Slowly, he nods, sitting down again the way he had been prior, and pulling his beloved pillow close to his chest. He can’t breathe, the tension suffocating. It doesn’t help that now you refuse to look at him. 
“... If you want,” he replies dumbly, staring at the floor. He feels trapped in place, afraid to move and scare you off. Despite every nerve in his body screaming at him to leave you be, he stays. You told him to, after all. Slowly, you sit down, his blankets creating a low wall between the two of you.
It’s only now that he gets a good look at you. You're tired, he knows, watching as your eyelids droop and your lazy movements when you get more comfortable under your blanket, but there’s more to it than just that. You seem so fragile, like sugar glass, breaking with even the slightest amount of pressure. He feels he can reach over and shatter you with the gentlest of touches, and that thought alone roots him in place. Since you came back, he’s never seen you without a smile. Your genuine smile was the prettiest, he decided rather early on, one that lights up your face and brightens those around you. Belphegor really, truly loves your smile.
He knows there was a point in time, not long ago, where he could have made it so no one saw it ever again. He can’t help but be grateful he didn’t succeed when he sees you smiling at his brothers. 
That’s never the smile you show him though. It’s not for lack of effort; you certainly try, and he loves you for that. But the smile you show him is always plastered on, and he knows you’re doing it for his sake. With Belphegor, your smile never reaches your eyes. Be that as it may, you’re never weak around him. Fake smiles prove exactly how strong you really are, but your heart races every time he enters the room. As much as he wishes your palpitations are out of excitement, he knows better than to give himself false hope. 
That’s why he’s so taken aback when he looks you over and you seem so vulnerable. Never, not in a million years, would he ever let himself believe that you’d allow yourself to look weak in front of him, not after what he did. Even so, here you are, shaking, knees drawn into your chest, and his heart soars because you’re showing him a new side to yourself. It aches at the knowledge that you’re feeling so vulnerable because of him. 
His eyes burn holes in the side of your head. You know he’s watching you, studying you, but you can’t bring yourself to meet his gaze. Not when the hands he uses to pull the blankets over his body are the exact same ones that led you to your untimely and violent demise, and not when every time you look at his face, you can also see Mammon’s above you, sobbing as he tries to will you not to fade away into nothingness. 
There’s no putting it nicely. You were murdered, and Belphegor was the one who killed you. As much as he tries to pretend it never happened, to act around you the same as his older brothers do, you would never forget. Neither would he, regardless of the effort he puts into pushing the memory out of his mind. His chosen way of coping was to laugh with you, to get close and have you forgive him without acknowledging the situation. It was too painful to talk about, after all. He willingly, happily snuffed out the life of someone his brothers love, and someone he’d find himself loving too. You became someone who changed him, helped him grow and be better. It was easier, simpler to act as if you’d met him the same way you’d met any of his brothers. 
Belphegor killed one of the last remaining parts of his past, a part that, while once warm and light, mutated and infected him, causing his anger to grow out of control, like a weed that suffocates any flower that tries to flourish. He killed a descendant of his sister, and the fact that you’re here now is more of a second chance than he thinks he could ever deserve in all his millenia of living. 
And yet, here you are. Scared and shaking, but here. The silence has stretched on for longer than he’d like; he wants to be able to love you, openly and happily, but knows it won’t happen. It can’t, unless he does what he thought was the very last thing he’d do. 
“I’m sorry,” Belphegor begins, voice much weaker than anticipated. He can hear your heartbeat pick up, and he curses himself mentally. Your lip between your teeth, you remain silent. His nerves force him to speak more. 
“I know that will never cut, and it will never be enough, but I’m sorry.”
There’s more silence. He feels like he can’t breathe, the tense atmosphere forcing its way around his throat and tightening its grip. He doesn’t know how long it takes you to even contemplate replying, let alone allow yourself to respond. Belphegor’s ears ring almost deafeningly loud. He can’t take it.
“You’re right.” 
His eyes, which he trained to the ground, dart up to your profile once more. You pause, wetting your lips. 
“You’re right, Belphegor. It won’t cut it.”
There’s not enough time to process your words before he really, really looks at you. Almost fearlessly, you meet his eyes. 
Almost fearlessly. 
The shaking of your hands betrays the strength of your voice. Belphegor’s chest aches. 
“But…”
There’s a pause as you speak. He can’t look away again, even as your eyes meet the stars once more. There’s no chance he’ll miss a word you say, even if it tears him apart.
“It’s… it’s really difficult. I know you know that, but…”
Each time you pause, Belphegor’s mind begins storming. He can’t figure out what you’re going to say, or how you’re going to react, and it drives him crazy. He’s usually so good at reading people, but you’re an enigma. It sends a chill down his spine. 
His throat is caught. Even if he had words to say, they wouldn’t be able to come out. So he sits in silence as you find your own. 
“I don’t want you to feel worse than you do.” You lick your lips. “Or maybe I do? I… I really don’t know. I don’t know how I’m supposed to feel about you, Belphie.”
The nickname tugs at his heart, more than he could ever admit. He wants to cry, wants to scream, wants to do anything other than look at your melancholy face, knowing he’s the problem. He wants to run and hide, to sleep forever. He can’t, though. Not when you’re here. Not now. 
Knuckles turn white as he clutches desperately onto his pillow. His breath shakes as he draws in air. 
“I want to love you. I want to love you as much as I love your brothers, and care about you as much as I care for them…”
You struggle to find the words. 
“... But it’s hard.”
You curse your lack of eloquence. Now, of all times, when your words are the only thing that enable you to communicate how you truly feel, they fail you. This might be your only chance to ever properly show Belphegor how you feel, what makes you so conflicted every time he walks into the room with a smile on his face, and yet all you can say is “it’s hard”. Obviously. 
A breath finds its way into your lungs, and the sound of your lips parting in the otherwise silent planetarium echoes in your ears.
You continue.
“It’s hard because every time I see your face, or I hear your voice, or I-”, you falter, heart catching in your throat, “or you touch me, I can’t help but be reminded of what happened.”
Belphegor doesn’t dare tear his eyes away from your form. The grief that settles into his face perfectly matches your own, eyebrows upturned and bottom lip quivering just the slightest bit. Even the trembling of your hands is replicated in his own. He’s never seen you like this, so incredibly vulnerable, and it tears him apart inside to know that he is the cause of it.
A shuddery breath comes from Belphegor, and you fight your instincts to check if he’s okay. You know he isn’t.
The silence deafens you, thundering in your ears so harshly that you're tempted to place your hands at the side of your head to muffle how quiet it is. You don’t, however, and whether it’s because you don’t want to look crazy, or because you’re afraid you might shatter if you move, you’ll never know. Do you want him to talk? Do you want him to say anything? Do you want an apology?
If you had an answer for that, you’re sure that things would have patched themselves up much quicker than this. You caution a glance at Belphegor, and the weight pressing down on your chest gets heavier at his expression. It feels almost as if you can inhale the guilt he feels, the emotion radiating off of him in waves.
“I… Logically, Belphie, I get it.” Again with that cursed nickname. Usually, hearing it from your lips makes Belphegor feel warm and goddamn near giddy, but now it only seemed to drive the knife in his gut further. 
“I understand what happened and why you did it. I may not agree… but I get it, you know?” You swallow.
“In the end, I’m still here. And… and I’ve come to learn that you’re nothing like that anymore. You’ve grown, and changed, and the guilt and anger that consumed you took control, and that's why you-- that’s--” 
You pause, clutching the blanket around you to try and ground yourself. The shakiness in your voice is not missed by Belphegor, and even if it had been, there’s no way he’d be able to ignore the tears that threaten to spill from your eyes. Slowly, subconsciously, one of your hands comes up to rest against your neck, a phantom of the grasp that once threatened to crush you.
“S-So… I understand why you did it. And I’m alive, and we’re friends, so it should all be okay, right?” Belphegor casts his glance away.
“But Belphie… as much as I want to forgive you, I also know that I’m never going to be able to forget what happened. It’s there in my dreams, and it’s there in your smile, and it’s there every single time your arm brushes mine and I flinch like a total loser.”
A weak chuckle makes its way out of your chest, and the halfhearted smile that follows forces a tear from your eye. You’re quick to wipe it away, hopefully quick enough so that it goes unnoticed by Belphegor.
It does.
What he does notice, however, is the frustration that holds tight to the edges of your sentences. The frustration is not directed at him, no. You would be yelling if that were the case, and maybe that would be easier for him to hear. No, this frustration is directed at yourself. You’ve been trying so hard, and all Belphegor has been doing is running away. His teeth dig so hard into his bottom lip, trying desperately not to show any anger he feels at himself, that he tastes iron.
“And then we became all buddy-buddy, you know? Like I was never lied to, or used, or manipulated, or-- or--”
Belphegor is torn from his self-pity when you continue, and he almost wishes you’d stop speaking. The thought that you might break him with your words has him shaking, and a feeling similar to fear courses heavily through his veins. Please, stop. He wants to go back to running away.
But you continue, as you always have.
“And I’m left not knowing how to feel. I’m so mad at myself for being such a coward and not being able to just get over it like everyone else, and I’m so fucking pissed that I can’t just exist around you like I do for everyone else. I mean, I used to be terrified of Lucifer, too.” Another fragile laugh, and you sweep the hair from your eyes with a shaky hand. Belphegor swallows hard.
“But I… I can’t pretend like nothing happened. As much as I want to be near you, and hug you, and take naps and play pranks on Luci with you… I can’t. I can’t act as if what I feel isn’t real, and what you did didn’t happen. It’s so hard, Belphegor.” You sigh, and finally look at him once more. He can’t meet your gaze, slumped over himself and hugging his pillow so tight to his chest it seems as if he wishes to disappear into it. “Especially because I really, truly want to understand why everyone loves you so much. And I want to love you, too. I want to know why Beel smiles every time you’re brought up in conversation, and I want to smile just the same. But… But right now, I can’t.”
Talking has gotten easier. The words that used to escape you have become accustomed to being used again, and confidence has restored in your gut. You sit a bit straighter as you watch Belphegor carefully, a sad smile lifting your cheeks. 
Belphegor knows that this is when he should swoop in, say something so intellectual that you’re caught off guard, and he can save you from… himself. This knowledge does nothing to save him from himself. He can’t even open his mouth to mime a sentence, let alone actually speak. The thought of how pathetic he must look settles under Belphegor’s skin, and he can feel his irritation rising. Not at you though, never at you. Not even when… When it all happened. His anger was misplaced, but he has never been angry at you.
Finally, when the quiet becomes too much, he forces himself to meet your gaze. The way you look at him, just as vulnerable and bare and scared as he is… he feels safe. He knows, even though your words sear his heart, that you never mean to hurt him, especially now. You’re being honest, and simply expect the same from him.
Belphegor inhales a deep breath, before willing himself to speak.
“I thought--” he croaks, and quickly clears his throat. Fuck. “I thought that if… if I could pretend that nothing happened, then I wouldn’t have to face any consequences.”
He curses audibly. Just how pathetic can he sound? Belphegor’s voice is hoarse and quivering, and weak. “Weak” is never a word that he would have used to describe himself, but now it echoes hauntingly against the confines of his skull. One of the most powerful demons in existence, and he finds himself quaking before a mere human. He cares for you, though, and he cares for you viciously. Something in Belphegor knows that he’s never going to be able to prove that to you unless he pushes his way through this.
So he forces himself to continue, even with every cell in his body desperately screaming at him to stop.
“I did what I did out of a place of guilt… and regret. I couldn’t stand the fact that it was because of me, that it was my fault, that I’m the reason that Lilith--”
Belphegor stumbles over his own words, and he sets down his pillow before he accidentally tears a hole through it. Instead he braces himself on the cool floor, in need of something steady to hold onto. This whole conversation shook him to the core. He can hardly believe he’s talking about his sister. She’s a topic that he’s avoided even around Beelzebub…
But if Belphegor ever wants even the possibility that you’ll forgive him, he knows he has to. Everything is on the line. His blunt nails press against the tiles and he focuses on steadying his voice.
“I couldn’t accept that it was my fault.” A newfound steadiness weaves its way around his words, and he finds himself sitting a bit straighter. “I’m the one who introduced her to the human world, and kept bringing her back. I’m the reason she suffered, and why the war started, and why we fell, and why she…” Belphegor coughs. “In the end, I couldn’t accept that I’m the one who killed her.
Your heart yearns to tell him that no, he’s wrong, it’s not all his fault. You know it won’t help right now, though, and that it isn’t your time to speak. Settling back a bit, you let your blanket fall from your shoulders. 
Belphegor’s heart stutters, and pounds so hard that he feels like it's trying to tear through his chest. Even so, he doesn’t miss the way your hand reaches out to smooth over his own, and for a moment he feels himself wanting to melt just from the simple touch. 
Belphegor pulls away. He doesn’t deserve your comfort, not yet.
“So… So when you said that you’re a descendant of Lilith, I-- I couldn’t help myself. I jumped at the chance to get to know you, learn about what makes you similar and what makes you different. Her blood flows through your veins, and I was quick to ignore what I did in favour of getting to know you, and… and inevitably, becoming just as fond of you as my brothers… but that can’t erase what I did.”
The feeling of understanding floods you and you find yourself nodding at his words. To be completely honest, even now, you’re scared. Your heart beats for many reasons, fear one of them, but you don’t run away. Not anymore. You couldn’t bring yourself to even if you wanted to.
Your hand, abandoned next to Belphegor’s, lay dormant. The need to comfort wills you to once again place your hand on his, but you don’t move. When he’s ready, if he ever is, you’ll be there.
Just as he’ll be there for you.
“I killed you, MC. And in doing that, I killed Lilith. Again.”
Countless emotions storm their way through Belphegor’s conscience, despair clawing at his throat, regret snapping his back, and guilt slowly crushing him under its weight. How is it that one can feel so empty, and yet so filled to the brim with misery?
“And not only that, but if I succeeded… I would have completely missed out on getting to know you, and caring about you as much as I do now. It would have been a loss that I never would have understood, but know for a fact that I would have felt. Even… Even when I was proud,” he spits out the word as if it’s poison, “of what I’d done, watching my brothers’ hearts break at the sight of your body… Even then, I felt it. The ache. It’s so fucking stupid.”
His tone, now bubbling with anger, stills you. It’s not directed at you, and you know this, but despite yourself, you freeze. Belphegor notices, and quickly clears his throat, relaxing his shoulders. He allows your heart a moment to slow as he regains his composure, and you find yourself breathing again.
“I know that me saying sorry is never going to cut it.” Belphegor turns his body to fully face you. He’s no longer running from his feelings, or from you. He knows he can’t anymore. Hesitantly, he lifts his trembling hand to place over yours. The muscles in your fingers tense, and he pauses to gauge your reaction. When you slowly nod your head once, he delicately places his hand on yours, using his thumb to gently begin massaging the tension away. “And I know that even if I do everything right from here on out, that there’s a chance that you won’t ever forgive me. And I understand why.”
Your heart sinks at his expression, his gaze locked on your joined hands. As aloof as he normally is, you can see none of that on his face now. When you turn over your hand he quickly pulls away, but your shaky movements to bring his hand back and intertwine your fingers urges him to go on. 
“But I want to try. And really try this time. I want you to be honest with how you feel, whether I’m frustrating you or scaring you or anything like that, and… and I want to be honest with you too. I…”
Belphegor trails off, but you squeeze his hand. He draws in a slow breath. 
“No matter what happens, no matter how you feel, we’re stuck together for the next few months. I want to spend that time getting to know you, and I want us to be as close as you are with any of my brothers… but I also want you to know that you shouldn’t feel forced. If it’s ever too much, I need you to tell me, and I promise I’ll back off.”
The smallest of smiles makes its way onto your face as you quietly agree. Belphegor doesn’t allow himself to try and figure out if it's genuine, out of pity, or sadness, but in spite of everything, it makes him feel a bit lighter. Just a bit.
“This won’t fix everything right away,” you say, and he now knows that your smile is a combination of the three. Along with this, though, Belphegor also knows the small sparkle in your eyes is hope, and he’s willing to take that hope and nurture it for however long he must.
“I know,” he sighs, but even he can feel the small tilt of a smile on his face, “but I’m willing to take as much time as you need to decide how you feel about me. And… And if you decide you hate me, which is fair, and that you never want to even be in the same room as me, I’ll respect your wishes.
Until then...Until you decide that you really, truly hate me, I won’t stop trying.”
There’s no way of telling how long his words linger in the air around the two of you, circling around your heads and making their way through your body. Even so, Belphegor diligently watches you, wanting to make sure he’s not overstepping his bounds. He even contemplates letting go of you, but is reassured when slowly, almost unnoticeably, you begin smoothing out the lines on the back of his hand with your thumb.
As much as you want to tell him that you could never hate him, you also know you can’t promise anything. Still, for now, just as much as him, you’re willing to try. You stay in silence, more comfortable than you’ve ever been in his presence, gently caressing the hand held in your own.
Eventually, Belphegor clears his throat once more. The vulnerability has made him tense and rendered his voice weak. 
“Can… can you hug me?” He all but whispers, fragility making his body quiver once more. He was completely open about his feelings for the first time in a lifetime, and the intensity of it left him craving affection. He knows how unfair this is to you, but he can’t help himself. He wishes to be held, for his fears to be quelled by someone so much stronger than him. “If you don’t want to,” he falters, speaking quickly, insecurely, “I won't even touch you. I-If you do, I promise I can keep my hands behind my back, and I won’t even--”
His words end abruptly as he feels you release his hand, and his heart sinks. He debates running away again, until he hears you moving towards him, and he finds he’s frozen in place. Slowly, but surely, with more courage circulating through your veins than you’ve had all night, you make your way over the blankets that divide you and position yourself right next to Belphegor, pulling him into your chest. Even now, he can feel how quickly, persistently your heart races, and yet you stay. True to his word, Belphegor rests his hands on the ground behind his back, but he doesn’t stop himself from nuzzling into your chest… and he cries. The complete, uninhibited release of his emotions hit him like a truck, and he sobs heavily into you, tears slowly but surely staining your shirt. You adjust yourself so you can hold him closer, slowly and reassuringly rubbing his back as he lets go of everything he’s been holding on to for longer than you can even imagine. This is a man who’s run from his emotions for centuries, and the fact that he’s willing to face them for your sake comforts you, cradles your heart and presses gentle kisses against the cracks. You know that you’re not going to wake up tomorrow with everything okay, but for now… for now you’re comfortable with his touch. Heaving in a deep, steadying breath, you reach down just enough to take Belphegor’s arms, and guide them to rest his hands on your hips. At this silent permission, he slowly, delicately wraps his arms around your waist, despite craving your body closer, wanting to hold you tight and never let go. He cradles you like you’re made of the most brittle glass, and you smile. The gesture touches your heart, and… and you feel safe. You know that all he wants to do is embrace you as tight as he can, but he doesn’t, even with permission. 
Here, in Belphegor’s arms, you feel safe. Here, where Belphegor’s grip on you is so gentle that it wouldn’t even crumple paper, you feel loved. As he cries into your chest, holding you as if you were an antique, hope slowly fills your heart.
Everything is far from perfect, but it’s still on the right track, here in the quiet planetarium.
1K notes · View notes
keilemlucent · 4 years
Text
tiles & released tension
(r18+)
gang orca | sakamata kugo x reader
continuation of this fic 
word count: 2.2k
the cycle of lust 
warnings: fem reader, monsterfucking, weird tongue, weird dicks, marking, mouthfucking, heat cycles, 
commission for @baroque-baby!!! thank u so much!!!!!!! 💗💗💗
a/n: wow here it is!! the second of the two comms :’’^) enjoy some more... Monster fucking esque stuff AND heat cycles!!!! enjoy y’all :’’^)
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Despite how physically demanding the overall experience of Kugo’s rut was, you were well taken care of. Beyond that, even. He spared no expense, forgot no detail, and left no need or want unattended.
He was a dutiful lover despite his carnal hunger.
...
You vaguely knew when it was day and night. Your temporary home had large, arching windows and skylights that let sunbeams in to bend against the rippling pool. You knew when it was bright outside, though the exact time of day didn’t seem to matter much to Kugo or you.
That ‘morning’ (whenever you awoke, it was light outside), you’d woken up in the pool, tucked against Kugo’s chest in the lapping, gentle current of the water. It was always a bit scary, waking up being naked and half-submerged.
Yet, you were always mentally-reminded that no harm would come to you. Drowning? Absolutely not. Kugo was literally holding you. If any other danger entered a twenty-meter vicinity, you were sure Kugo would be ready to crush the threat instantly.
But, there were no threats. A peaceful courtyard that let in nice light during the evening with lots of pretty flowers and landscaping.
In some of your more fucked out and fucked up moments, arms braced against the wet tile as Kugo reamed you for the umpteenth time, you found yourself dazing off at the reflections and colors as you blinked back overstimulated tears.
Yet, that morning, you’d woken up without a writhing cock in you. Though it was close by and ever-hard, just as always.
“Mornin’,” You yawned, stretching to pop a kiss onto Kugo’s cheek. His chest rumbled out a sound too low for you to hear, a new, cetacean-based feature he’d developed over his rut. “Sleep well?”
“Very.”
Considered how much cum he spilled into you and the surrounding pool the night prior, he had to be exhausted, right?
To some extent.
He was a pro hero, with the stamina to match. Not to mention most of your days were spent in the pool of perfectly treated and temperate water, allowing Kugo to be in his most optimal state whether he was fighting villains or fucking your brain out.
You weren’t complaining.
Once again, dutiful.
Kugo adjusted you as he needed, a low growl pitching from his throat.
You ended up on your knees, skin scraping the tiles on the submerged bench below. It was a favored position, allowing the upper half of your body to be up and out of the water. Though you had, several times, gotten a mouthful or noseful of water due to Kugo breeding you (so fucking well) in the pool, it wasn’t preferred.
(Most of the time.)
Kugo rumbled as he floated in the water behind you, thickly-taloned hands coming to rest on your hips under the water, “You’re so beautiful in the mornings, you have no idea.”
He’d been waxing more since all of this started. In the moments he wasn’t insatiably worked up by his primal state, he was lavishing you in compliments and kindness as you’d never seen.
Kugo fished around in a nearby float basket, pulling away with a fancily crafted bottle of lube. It was a light lavender, oil-based, and heavenly smelling as he poured a bit of it on his hand.
Considering how long and sharp his nails had become, it was far too dangerous for him to prepare you like he once did.
Good thing his cock was tapered.
You could feel the bump of it against your ass, almost slivering against your hot skin under the water. Kugo slicked it down with the lube as he grabbed another item from the basket— a small bullet vibrator, waterproof and strong.
You beamed as he laid it on the pool deck by your arms.
“Am I allowed to use that?” You asked, keeping your voice teasing and sweet, still scratchy from sleep.
Kugo grunted another primal noise.
Consider it’d been several hours since he’d had his fill of you, he was bound to be insatiable. He tended to get a bit more... animalistic when he got so needy for you.
Social conventions had been mostly negated during the weeks of Kugo’s rut, it was a necessity. Not to mention that they were difficult to even think about with the distractions at your disposal.
The tip of Kugo’s cock, slick and squirming, teased as your entrance as he settled behind you, towering over your bent frame. The water sloshed around both of you, though neither of you minded.
You were far more focused on the way the appendage was teasing from your clit to your leak cunt without rest.
Laying your head on your arms, you arched your back at an even harsher angle, just barely grinding against Kugo as he prepared you as much as his cock would allow.
(It wasn’t entirely necessary considered how often he’d been stuffing you full— your cunt was practically shaped to him by that point.)
His chest bore down on your back, heat radiating off of him as he pressed you into the tiles and pool wall. You swallowed as his hand grabbed around your throat and jaw, pulling your head to the side so his long, (also) tapered tongue could lave along your shoulders.
“You always taste so good in the mornings,” Kugo spoke low and rolling. You squeezed your eyes shut, rolling your hips back to bump against his own.
As much as he fluffed you up verbally, you could feel how he was holding himself back from wrecking you.
His talons bit into the meat of your hips, his tongue licked its way to your ear, gooey saliva mixing with the water and sweat against your skin. His deep breaths, coming harsher each minute, made his chest bear down on your own, flattening you to the til, though not fully squishing you.
“Kugo,” You spoke in a singsong voice, grabbing the vibrator and flicking it on. “Why don’t you fuck me like you mean it instead of being polite? I thought we were past formalities.”
He went still, aside from the twirl of his thin cockhead at your entrance.
“I mean,” You were pressing your luck, but that was part of the fun. “I know you want to breed me so well that I leak all day, so why not get to it?”
You hummed, just for a moment, before Kugo was pressing you down, hard, squeezing the air out of your lungs in the best possible way.
“Is that really what you want?” Kugo growled, the sound shaking in several different pitches as he fucked into your cunt in one clean stroke.
You choked on your breath, scrambling against the wet tile as the vibrator slipped out of reach into the water.
Taking him at full length in one go wasn’t impossible, but the stretch of it all at once ached. His cock pressed and writhed in your cunt as he held his hips steady, shaking slightly.
You took a shuddering breath as his fat tongue rolled over your shoulders.
“How badly do you want to be ruined?”
If you could’ve melted into the water of the pool, you would’ve.
Part of you wanted to give one last fiery retort, but you were far too mushy to muster it up as Keigo thrust fully once more. He nearly bottoms out, you figure, considering the way his cock twists against your inside, pressing at your knot of nerves.
You moaned, lips parting and falling open.
Kugo greedily took the opportunity to further crane your neck, his thick tongue dipping into your mouth, snaking along the backs of your teeth.
You were caught up in it all, the sensations seemingly so fresh after sleep. Each new slam of Kugo’s hips, the taste of him filling your mouth, and the sounds of slapping water all felt magnified.
Whining, you bucked back into his thrusts, feeling the slow expansion of his cock inside you as Kugo grew ever closer.
His throaty laugh vibrated into your own mouth, the sound almost too loud for you to fully catch as your bones rang in your flesh with the tone He took your shock to push his tongue further, deeper into your mouth, licking at the back your tongue and molars.
It was almost too much, as oxygen became a luxury.
Except, Kugo grounded you easily, the hand on your hips and the pressure of his body above yours tethering you to reality as he fucked you in earnest.
Each slap of his body against your own ignited a new wave lust in your, slick spilling down your inner thighs and into the water. Your clit ached, helplessly ignored under the pseudo-surf. You didn’t have the mind in your to try and clamor for the lost vibrator, your mind swimming far too deep to think that far.
Instead, your ground back into Kugo all your could, your noises and moans dampened by the tongue throat-fucking you.  
He didn’t seem to mind at all.
You could feel yourself getting fuller and fuller, as impossible as it seemed. Kugo’s cock expanded as it neared climax, pressing at your walls before painting them white and sticky.
The grip on your jaw released, his tongue recoiling from your mouth as his head fell against your shoulder.
“How is this for ‘breeding’ you?” Kugo knew your asked, but asked anyway, chuckling at the way you desperately dripped for more of him.
You nodded, “Very, good. Very—”
Kugo’s pace became rougher.
His hand slipped under your, into the water to rub the meat of his palm into your clit in small, insistent circles. The nearby scrap of his claws only served to make you twitch and want more.
“P-Please, more!” You cried out, laying your head onto the tile as his thrusts got rougher, his teeth scraping and sucking at your neck, and his tongue soaking your skin—
And with a few final pressed of Kugo’s hand and you were coming undone for him in time with him absolutely filling you up.
It was filthy in the best possible way.
You sputtered out profanities as you came, Kugo’s hot seed spilling into you in thick, creamy spurts. The heat of it was almost scalding against the temperature of the bathwater.
Kugo kept a firm grip on you, despite the way how his skin had become so slick, fucking you through his long orgasm. It was something to do with his rut, but Kugo tended to spill into you not for seconds, but rather minutes.
It gave you time to come down as his fattened cock filled you.
You went pliant against the pool deck as another spurt of cum filled your core. Kugo was still in the throes of it, grunting every few moments and grinding into your insides. You weakly pressed back, shaking with your own breath.
Kugo’s hand pressed into your stomach, feeling the bulge of his own cock and cum filling you. The touch only strengthened your own sensations, the mix of it, and your full womb causing your eyes to roll back in your skull.
And then, it all slowed.
You were both still for a moment, the remnants of your movement told in the slosh of the pool and its harsh ripples.
Kugo gently turned your face to his, smoothing back some of your hair and dropping a few deliberate kisses against your cheeks, “Are you alright?”
You nodded, blissed-out and fucked out, “Very alright.”
It was all the response you could manage.
You couldn’t help but feel a bit disappointed as Kugo pulled out of you, an odd rush of water and fertile nut mixing below you. The absence of the stretch of his cock left you wanting.
But, Kugo was a dutiful mate, even in this state.
He carefully lifted you in his arms, carrying you out from the breeding pool to a nearby room.
It was one of the rooms you slept in, that of a handful of others. This one had a rounded ceiling and high windows, cream-colored walls and a large, water-proofed lounging bed.
Kugo gently set you down on it, grabbing a blanket-sized towel and wrapping you in it as fully as he could.
He tended to focus on your physical needs after fucking, especially when you two had been doing it so much. You’d never complain about how there was almost always a perfectly chilled water bottle in your hand and a bottle of massage oil at the ready.
Still, you wanted him—
That was why you were there, after all.
Kugo had stepped out, undoubtedly gathering up the supplies to tend to your body as he knew you needed.
You flickered your gaze to a nearby mirror, taking in your own visage.
Clearly, you’d been through the wringer. Dark circles punched under your eyes, your skin pruned from so long in the sweet-smelling water, and a smattering of rakes from Kugo’s teeth laid across your shoulders.
You looked like hell.
...
You smiled.
Kugo walked back in a moment later, just as you were standing up, wobbling on your jellied legs.
He was quick to wash to you, pulling you up against his slick body (as his cock began to re-harden again), “Sit down, love, please. I can get you anything you need.”
“You can,” You beamed up at him, craning on your tiptoes and pulling him down by his neck. “And guess what I need?”
He rumbled out a laugh, undoubtedly knowing where your words were going based on your suddenly tender affections, “And what's that?”
“You.”
899 notes · View notes
remsmoonlight · 3 years
Text
— title : point of view
— word count : 3k words
— pairing : daryl dixon x reader
— summary : tomorrow is something that is never promised, less so when the dead walk the Earth. being trapped for the night when a storm pours down upon you and daryl while trapped in a decrepit house by a few walkers are you sick and tired of hiding what you feel.
— warnings : some swearing, talk of potential death ( of the reader ) , a wee bit of angst that turned into more at the end :)
note: omg another daryl oneshot i gotta chill ajksajksk, but i had like seven main bullet points i made to follow when writing this and i followed like...... two, three at the most, anyways.... enjoy? this is brought to u by ariana’s discography lmao oops it does be cute at some point tho ... also felt a bit hsm with that one line at the end ahaha but fr lemme stop talking now
      ✧・゚: *✧・゚:*   requests are open !   *:・゚✧*:・゚✧
Dark and gloomy clouds swirl over your head, blending into an extremely large and angry looking ready to descend from above. You wonder to yourself just how long you have left before the loud cracks that crumble through the air to accompany the forceful winds and pouring drops of rain are finally released. Halfway through the trip back from the town that lays after miles from the prison the car used decided it preferred to lay quietly in the middle of the road, shortly after the sickly sputters from the engine you heard Daryl mutter a few curse words. You were unable to hold in your amusement, despite the fact that a lack of transport obviously leaves you in a vulnerable position, it felt like it was your luck for that to happen to you.
It’s why you stay behind following the hunter in silence.
Studying him with focused eyes you can’t help but wonder how he never realises when you’re unable to tear your gaze away from him. In the beginning when you began to develop a certain affection for him you had been glad, for it to be too embarrassing for the thoughts you had about him in your head. In spite of this, when you realised that it was much more than a crush did you wish for him to mind read, because you have no idea just how to approach him about such a sensitive topic and while he can be tender about feelings, it’s also his downfall.
“ it’ll be gettin’ dark soon, there should be some houses down there to spend the night in. “
You stop in your tracks with a curious look that bled so suddenly into your features you had no time to stop it.
“ you don’t want to carry on? I mean, we’re not far from home? “ you question him with a hint of fear coddling your words.
“ we’d be trippin’ over our feet. Let’s back it back in one piece, yeh? “
Nodding, you regain your pace. It’s been a few months since you’d been hopping from one house to the other during that harsh winter, the bare thought of having to stay in yet another frail structure sent a chilly hand drawing its claws deeply up your spine. If you never had your group, you don’t think you would have made a winter like that, barely protected from the elements and the walkers that wished to plunge their teeth cavernously into your flesh.
“ as long as we leave as soon as the sun comes up. Please. “ you plead, your words filter off into a gentle volume from your position.
Leaves crumble and buckle underneath the weight, the sound of crickets dominate your surroundings as the two of you walk in silence. You itch to start a conversation, but the fear of distracting the man and annoying withhold the words that wish to fall from your lips, even then you don’t know how to begin. What would you say? There’s not much to talk about in a world where the dead have risen, where they wish to drag the world into decomposition.
Your wandering mind is pulled from its very own depths from a noise coming from Daryl, he’d turned to catch your attention. You both set to work attempting to enter any of the abandoned houses, hoping one had been left unlocked at some point.
Of course, luck is scarce. Despite there not being a soul who occupies them, they’re still somehow locked. Mournfully, you wonder if the owners of these homes had thought the governments and armies would eventually lock everything under their control, to the point that there would be a house for them to come back to? Your heart thuds painfully in your chest to think about what happened to them, and if they’re even still surviving.
A large thud draws you back to the present, the wooden door splinters at the force Daryl puts into a large kick to its frame.
“ well, there goes the lock. “ you mutter humourously, lifting the heavy bag higher up onto your shoulders as you walk in the open door.
“ we’ll put the couch there, stop any unfriendly types that come our way. “
“ I don’t know if there’s anyone left anymore. “ you reply, dropping the bag to the floor and moving towards the couch.
Situated on the other side of it, you grip the plush handle and lift with a struggle. It’s a strain to get it through the doorway to  turn it around the corner, but eventually it happens. Daryl is joined by your presence by his side, you both push ⏤ this time it’s an easier feat with two of you on one side to dedicate your strength and weight to advance it.
As soon as you finish, a heavy crackle cuts through the air.
“ we got here just in time, huh? “
“ just about. “ he answers you, sparing a glance before moving through the lower floor ⏤ searching for anything that can be taken back to the prison.
Thunderstorms had never been your favourite thing growing up. Of course, rain was something that calmed you from the anxieties life brought, but the thunder and lightning is what you loathed. Never knowing when you were about to receive a fright from the loud rumbles and flashing lights ruined the whole experience for you.
The rustling Daryl makes is the only thing that brings you comfort in this moment, keeping you grounded and away from your thoughts. It doesn’t escape your notice that these houses feel no more than graveyards with the memories that have no use to live, instead haunting the structures with what could have been had chaos and death not taken over. You climb the stairs, hugging your sides as you refuse to touch the handrail leading up stairs.
There is a middle room with access granted without having to push open the door to gain entry. Your eyes scan the room’s interior, even with the dust and grime that bespeckle its surfaces, you can still see its beauty. Now, who does that remind you of? Your mind cheekly thinks before you banish it into the shadows of your brain, where you know it will force itself out with an immense stubbornness.
Despite the thunder booming in the distance frequently, you can’t help but admire the beauty of rain drops falling to the ground with a dainty grace only it holds. The sky continues to grow dimmer, only seeing the rain on your level and lower, no street lights flood the street to aid you in being able to see torrent from above. Jumping at another roar of sound from the storm, your heart begins to pick up its pace, so much you don’t realise Daryl joining you in the room.
“ scared? “
Turning around with such speed that leaves you surprised whiplash did not greet you, Daryl is left smirking at your reaction.
“ yeah, I hate these things. “ you respond, a bitterness coating each word heavily as you speak.
“ more than walkers? “ he questions you, as he shifts his weight from one foot to the other.
“ well, I suppose not that much .. “ another clap of thunder interrupts you, the rain beating harder and harder on the windows of the bedroom. “ can we talk about anything? This shit really grates on my nerves. “
“ what y’wanna talk about? “
Your mind stalls, with the previous thoughts that had been swirling in a state of disorder your draw a blank. A continuous thump downstairs interrupts your shrug, speeding down the stairs you realise a few walkers are trying to enter the property, of course their lack of intelligence fails to realise they’re throwing themselves into the walls and not the blocked doors.
“ shall we take them out? “ moving closer to the lengthy curtained window next to the door to get a better look, you can see three walkers hauling themselves mindlessly against the structure.
“ nah, the storm’ll get ‘em soon enough. “ he shakes his head softly, your mind taking note of the lack of proximity between your bodies as he repeats your action. “ no need to risk ourselves. “
“ wouldn’t be the first time you’ve risked your life. “
“ s’nothin. “ he contradicts gruffly, wiping a finger across his nose at your words. He truly doesn’t view it as that, refusing to think of it as risking his life. To Daryl, it doesn’t feel like risking everything to help the people around him, it’s not something he can find the words to explain but all he knows if there’s a chance, he would do it again and again.
“ Daryl Dixon, so humble. “ you speak warmly with a gentle smile threading itself into your features. “ you need to give yourself more credit. “
“ stop. “
“ you’re as brave as anyone in the group. I’d say braver than Rick. “ you joke, setting yourself from the entryway to the sitting room. “ although, if I had to choose you and Carol .. I’m sorry, but Carol every time! “
“ damn woman frightens me. “
Laughter light in weight dances airily between you with an elegance in its movement. For even a fraction of a second you forget that there are walkers that are itching to break through into the property, that there’s an angry storm that threatens to demolish whatever stands in its path, because right now it’s only you both here and now in this one room.
“ she’s come a long way. “ you agree, pulling a lone chocolate bar from your bag. Your favourite and you’re thanking the universe that it hasn’t spoiled yet. Turns out all these preservatives and chemicals have some use after all you note to yourself as half is offered to the man standing across from you.
“ so have ‘yuh. “ he acknowledges, taking the broken half of the candy from you.
“ I think we all have to be honest. I don’t think any one of us are the people we used to be. “
“ now who’s humble? “ Daryl asks, his tone light in relaxed merriment. He’d long since taken note of the transformation you’d gone through, he’s never seen you so strong as a person before.
“ don’t you turn this round on me, Dixon. “
The two of you fall silent, you direct your gaze to the window and the raindrops that litter the window pane’s surface. The harsh noises thundered no more, leaving a calm pitter of precipitation to fall with no interruption. From your position on the second couch, you wrap around a thin decorational blanket around your arms, leaning your cheek against the palm of your hand.
Pretending the world hasn’t gone to hell, that it’s just a normal evening where you’re admiring the scene before you. Skies that weep heavily is what the Georgian greenery has been calling out for, especially since the warmer temperatures have returned in full force. Switching your line of sight to Daryl, you feel a mellowness in the pit of your stomach as you watch him fondly. You can’t be sure if it’s the lack of distractions or eyes from your group, but you feel a miniscule spark of confidence within your confines.
“ come sit down, you can relax for a bit. “ you call, trying to convince him lightly. Your hand moves to pat the seat next to you.
“ can’t relax in this world. “ despite the disagreement in his words he does move towards your position on the plush seat.
“ it doesn’t mean we can’t make it. Otherwise we’d be burnt out, I’d hate to see that happen to you. “ You divulge as you reply to him, little inklings of hope in your tone.
“ y’don’t gotta worry ‘bout me. “
“ but I do, Daryl. “ you groan as a dull glumness contorts your features into something new. “ I mean, the lengths you go to .. you scare me to death. “
“ don’t be dumb. “ Daryl warns lowly as he shakes his head, few have shared their vulnerability with him. Perhaps only Carol, his mind can’t wrap itself around the fact that people genuinely care for him. Growing up, he’d been taught of it as a weakness. Something that should not exist, no one cared when he went missing for a short while as a child, and now having people who show him the opposite? It leaves a strange feeling to settle within his heart.
“ please, I need to tell you. I mean, I might not even be here tomorrow. “
“ nah, don’t say that. Y’will. “ he argues, he doesn’t even want to entertain the notion of not seeing you even for a day ⏤ let alone forever.
Truthfully, you’d not been particularly close. He understands it now, he pushed everyone away wherever he had the chance to. But after the downfall of the farm? You wouldn’t let up in trying to forge bonds that could rival even the strongest of metals. You had no idea, but he’d overheard you talking to Beth one day. When you said you didn’t want to be afraid of living, to have something worth dying for. That struck him deep.
“ neither you or I can guarantee that. Now, call me selfish but I can’t die with what ifs in my brain. “ you explain, you know it’s probably selfish to announce any kind of fondness for a person nowadays, because you can be ripped from their existence without any kind of announcement. But if you were to depart from the realm of the living, you’d want to have affectionate memories to experience and for them to look back on.
“ what y’sayin? “
Your eyes well up in frustration, whether it’s over the way you find the words are hiding beneath your tongue like cowards under the cloak of night or over the fact that you have begun this topic of conversation, backing yourself into a corner. There’s so much you want to say but how you should is not coming easy. Eloquence in your words is something you find yourself yearning for with all of your being should it bring you a happy ending to this discussion.
This isn’t a fairytale, there’s no happy or bad endings in real life you sorely think. There’s just reality, and the conclusions for that are neither black or white.
Fingertips grip the roots of your hair for a fleeting moment before letting go as if you’d never clutched them in exasperation at all.
Shutting your eyes so hard they hurt, you muster up the courage to speak the truth you’ve locked away in your heart, allowing it the light it has been deprived of for so long.
“ Daryl, I ⏤ “ your voice shuts off with a painful sound, sighing as if to psych yourself up. “ I feel more for you than I probably should. “
When Daryl says nothing, you open your eyes. Your entire being preparing yourself for the worse answer, this moment may hurt now but the pain will lessen. At least your soul feels lighter with the hidden information no longer chained to it as a burden, no longer will it have to be weighed down by its mass.  
“ I know it’s probably not what you want to hear, but I couldn’t keep it in any longer. “
“ who said I didn’t wanna hear? “
“ ⏤ what ? “ you question, your brows falling lower as you squint in disbelief. You wonder if your brain is forming a false memory to protect itself later on.
“ y’don’t nothin’ to do with me though. “ he hesitates, the automatic response to push away anything good that comes his way to the furthest reaches. “ nothin’ but trouble. “
A sorrowful smile full of grief clouds your features, your unshed tears threaten to fall. If only he could see himself from your point of view, he doesn’t see just how admirable of a human being he is. Yes, he has his flaws but who doesn’t? In all of humanity, you don’t think there has ever been a perfect person, but it’s how they approach their downsides that shows the peak of their humanity, that they don’t let the darkness fester in their heart, to poison their soul into becoming a shell of a kind hearted person. That shows the strength of their character.
Daryl? You feel honoured to have been a first hand witness to see him turn from a hot ball of anger to a softer, kinder soul.
“ Daryl, you really don’t see what I do.” you forsake everything, leaning forwards and laying your hands across his. Taking in the immense warmth from them. “ That? It hurts me, because you’re rather amazing. “
Saying nothing, Daryl looks down at your intertwined hands. He wants the chance that’s being offered, though the fear of being the one who poisons everything he lays his touch upon settles heavily on his shoulder. No one has come out unscarred when dealing with a member of the Dixon family, his family tree being nothing more than toxic, with weeds that wrap around the limbs of the poor fool who got involved with them, as they drag them to their lowly depths. He doesn’t know how to let go of the past and for this he continues to pay, with the high price being his happiness in the present world. No response leaves his lips, for the first time in a long time he doesn’t know what to say, while knowing what he wants to say. It’s not until he feels arms wrapped around the top of his shoulders is he brought back down to Earth, a shudder of a breath is released from him as he realises what is going on. The action is reciprocated in earnest, you’re full of gratitude that he’s accepting your comfort ⏤ knowing it could have been a gamble of a decision, a fifty fifty chance of him reacting negatively or positively. You, too, draw comfort from the position you both find yourself, clutching the other. Hope dawns on your heart, knowing Daryl is not a particularly affectionate man. This means a lot, for it’s a leap for you both.
“ thank you. “ he whispers in the night. You know that this is the start of something new.
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obwjam · 3 years
Note
would you be able to do a Mandalorian/Pedro Pascal x borrower??
I guess the plot would be where grogu finds the borrower, the borrower is like terrified to death and then mando finds them, and like he has to do something that’ll make them trust him or something?
btw i’ve been reading your stories and prompts like for two hours straight and i just wanna say that i would stay up all night reading your works instead of doing anything else i love them so much 🥺❤️
also, it’s totally okay if you don’t want to, or have a reason not to, i have no idea if you’re still doing requests and stuff or anything. thank you so much though!
ugh oh my gosh thank you thank you!!!! i love to be a sponsor of procrastination. keep up the good work. i truly love the idea of grogu just unknowingly terrorizing a tiny and i’m way overdue to write some mando g/t so let’s go!!!
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Din Djarin found you running for your life, nearly tripping over yourself and screaming so loud that he was sure the entire planet could hear. He was confused at first -- he had never seen a borrower before, and it took him a moment to register what exactly was going on. 
What were you running from exactly? Well, you didn’t know what it was, but it had giant ears, tiny arms, outstretched hands and could waddle as fast as you could run. You recognized the look in its eyes, too. One word: food.
“GROGU! NO!” 
At the sound of another voice, you whipped your head up and subsequently tripped over a rock. You slammed into the ground, gathering yourself for a moment before flipping yourself over and gasping at the sight.
At this point, you kind of wish that fall had killed you. The only thing worse than a bloodthirsty creature trying to eat you was the human who owned it. And, god, you couldn’t even tell where this human started and where he ended. He was covered head-to-toe in shiny metal armor, complete with a dark helmet and some gnarly looking weapons. He looked like a giant-and-a-half. You were done for.
Din cocked his head, tapping the side of his helmet to do a quick scan of you. The scan didn’t tell him much, but it showed him you were four inches tall and scared out of your wits. He frowned at how badly you were shaking.
He held Grogu out in front of him and tilted his head down. “No. No. You can’t be doing that. You hear me? Don’t do that again. No.”
Grogu stared back blankly with a smile and a patoo. Din rolled his eyes and plopped him into his pod before turning his full attention to you. He was surprised that you hadn’t tried to run away, but truth be told, you were frozen in fear. When a human was involved, there was nowhere to run.
Slowly, Din crouched down, trying to a closer look without looming too much. It was impossible to do that, but he was trying. A pang of guilt shot through his stomach as he peered down at you, cowering and starting to cry. Oh boy. 
“Hey, hey...” he started, holding his hands up to show he wasn’t going to do anything. At the movement of his hands, you flinched and moved your arms up to cover your face. 
Din hummed. “No, no. See?” He waved his hands a little. “No weapons. Nothing.”
You gave this curious giant the side-eye. He was clearly a warrior, or a bounty hunter of some kind. Why was he trying to be peaceful?
“What are you doing out here, little guy?” he tried, the helmet masking the true sound of his voice. “There’s a lot of imps around here. It’s not safe.”
You raised an eyebrow, confused as to what imps were, but all of your words were stuck in your chest. You couldn’t tell where this giant was looking or what he was thinking. Not to mention he was absolutely huge. Those boots could crush you in an instant.
“Hmm.” Din spent most of his days talking to a baby who couldn’t speak basic, so this should not have been as big of a challenge as it was. But you were clearly terrified out of your mind with the way your gaze was locked forward and how badly you were trembling. You looked like you were about to vomit. 
“Uh, do you... do you have a name?”
You opened your mouth, but no words came out. Din was about to try another question when the sound of blaster fire filled the air. You both looked toward the source of the sound, and Din quickly whipped his head back to you.
“You need to get out of here. There are some really angry guys coming this way.”
As soon as the giant shifted his position, you assumed the worst. “No!” you cried. “No, pl-please. I... I don’t... please... this--this is my home...”
Din’s eyes went wide as you lost it right in front of him. He could certainly understand your apprehension, but he clearly wasn’t going to hurt you. The Imperials would.
“I know you’re scared, kiddo, but when those Imperials find you, they won’t be as kind to you as I am.” You could barely comprehend what he was trying to tell you. You were far too petrified. Din looked at you, back over his shoulder, and back to you. Those imperials would be here any minute. There was no way you weren’t going to get squashed. He only had one thing left he could do.
“AH!” you shrieked as soon as the gloved hand entered your vision, but it was useless to try to run. Giant digits wrapped around your body, and you clung onto the folds of his glove for dear life as he lifted you into the air at a speed that was far too fast for your liking. Stars popped in and out of your vision as you kicked and punched and yelled in protest. 
Din grimaced, barely able to feel the impact of your struggles. You were clearly overpowered, but more clearly terrified. 
“This is for your own good,” he mumbled, hoping you would hear him as he plopped you down into a brown satchel that was draped over his shoulder. 
Inside the bag, you were clawing for a way out. Screams of LET ME GO! went unheard as the giant started to move. Din was trying his hardest not to jostle you too much, but that was a tall task considering he was fleeing from a legion of stormtroopers who were after the kid.
There were a lot of grunts, screams and blaster bolts, but soon, all was quiet again. You had since shut your eyes and gripped tightly to the walls of the bag to stay stable and ignore the chaos, but it didn’t take long after the violence died down that you realized the giant was still walking somewhere.
“Hey. HEY!” you yelled. Din was ignoring you. There were surely more troopers hot on his tail, so he had to get to the Razor Crest and fast. He pushed Grogu up onto the ship and opened the roof to his pod before hurriedly climbing up the ladder to the cockpit. The deafening sound of the ship powering up made your stomach drop, but it all turned to a soft hum once Din made the jump to hyperspace. 
Light flooded your vision, and you grimaced as that damned hand came reaching for you again. Again, protesting it would be foolish, so you just closed your eyes to fend off the headache that was sure to come when he lifted you too fast. 
Din made sure to go slower this time, and when he held you out in his open palm, he finally got a sense of how small you really were. His fingers were slightly taller than you, and with your knees pulled to your chest, you were more the size of that stupid metal ball Grogu liked to play with. Maybe that’s why he went after you.
“I’m... sorry about that,” Din started, trying to sound earnest. “You were in danger. I didn’t want you to get hurt.”
You finally opened your eyes. The view in front of you took your breath away. The sky was swirling blue all around you, but you quickly realized that wasn’t the sky at all. It was space. Hyperspace.
Din huffed a laugh. “First time in space?”
You nodded robotically, forgetting for a moment you were sitting in the palm of a giant. “First time... anywhere.”
Din smirked. He supposed that made sense, but it didn’t make it any less shocking -- or adorable -- to him.
“I’m sorry about Grogu,” he said, as if you were supposed to know who he was talking about. You cocked your head at him. “Grogu. The little green guy that... tried to eat you.”
“Oh.” You shuddered at the memory. “It--it’s okay, I guess.”
A pause.
“I can bring you back to your planet, if you’d like. It wouldn’t be too much trouble.”
You considered this, but something was holding you back. “What... who were those guys? What did they want?”
Din sighed. “Imperials. They were looking for me, but they were also occupying any and all territory they could. I hate to say it, kid, but even if I brought you back, I don’t think your home would be much of a home anymore.”
“It was never that much of a home anyway,” you grumbled. You were surprised that you could tell Din was waiting for you to continue. “I mean, it’s just. That green guy was not the first thing to try and eat me.”
“Oh.” Din didn’t know what to say. 
“It’s fine. That’s just... how it is.” A beat of silence. “Are you... are you going to sell me?”
“Sell you?” Din was confused. “Why would I sell you?”
“I--I thought -- that’s what humans do, isn’t it? Especially ones like you.”
Din frowned. That was not something he had thought of. “No. I’m not going to sell you.”
“...so what are you gonna do with me?”
“I...” Din faltered. What was he going to do? He was so focused on getting you to safety that he didn’t calculate the long-term implications. Through his helmet, he stared at you, your eyes shaking and pleading with him for mercy. You looked so small compared to the space around you. So vulnerable. Din felt this pull toward you; that protective instinct that caused him to change his life for Grogu. At least the kid could defend himself. You couldn’t.
“You can stay here, with me,” Din offered. “Until we can find you a place to live. How’s that sound?”
“Really?” This giant didn’t seem like the hospitable type, but he just shrugged. 
“You’ll be safe here,” he assured. “I promise.”
“What about... Groku?”
“Grogu,” he smiled. “I’ll make sure he keeps his distance.”
You could barely believe this was happening. You were nearly eaten, discovered by a human, kidnapped and killed; now, he was not only offering you shelter, but something you’ve never had in your entire life: protection. Even if it was a trap, what did it matter? What would be his motivation for lying? If he was offering you a place to be safe... how could you possibly turn it down? He didn’t have to try and save you from the Imperials, but he did. Maybe he was being sincere.
You tried to hide your smile, but failed. “Y-yeah. I guess I’ll stay here. I’ll... try not to get in your way.”
“...don’t think that’ll be a problem,” Din said. He gently moved his hand to the console in front of him and placed it down, allowing you to jump off. Din marveled at how some of the controls practically towered over you. “Is this okay?”
Once you got your bearings, you slowly turned around and fully took in the beauty of what was in front of you. It took up your entire vision like the most amazing spectacle in the galaxy. You couldn’t believe you hadn’t experienced this before.
“Yeah,” you said, turning back to Din, who failed to suppress a smile of his own. “This is perfect.”
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ciggylungz · 4 years
Text
Eat your heart out
Blurb night- 1.8k words
(request: ok but what if u wrote one where y/n is a virgin and they finally did it after dating for months and then Harry's friends came to visit him and you overheard h talking how bad u are and all that angsty stuff...)
 Virginity
The word means a something different to everyone. Some people save it for marriage, some don’t care about it, others tie it to religion. It’s all up to personal interpretation and value. For Y/n, it’s not that she didn’t want to lose it, she just never felt ready until she met Harry.
She had met him through a mutual friend, they were both invited to a birthday party and just got on so well they decided to get to know each other better. Dates, hangouts, and many hours spent together later they had become official and now they’re 5 months in and going strong.
A few nights ago, she had finally felt ready. She had communicated to Harry at the start of their relationship she’d never been intimate with someone before and it might take her a while to feel ready to be so vulnerable with him, but eventually the night came and while it was a bit clumsy filled with trial and error she thought over all it was a special experience. Harry had made her feel comfortable, he had made her feel like she was beautiful and made him happy, so she’s completely confused and crestfallen at the words she’s hearing come from his mouth echoing through the spacious house.
“mate, it was bad. Like proper awful, I almost gagged at some points from how bad it was.”
A cruel laugh followed his words. Her chest felt hollow, like her heart had caved in just from his words. She couldn’t bring herself to stop listening, she guessed she was just a glutton for punishment because the hurtful words just kept coming.
“I thought being with a virgin would be hot!”
She heard the voice of one of his friends exclaim, she had never hated the sound of someone’s voice before that moment.
“so did I! it’s why I put up with the wait, thought she’d be bloody tight and a good shag, but I was dead wrong. She barely got wet; she didn’t even taste good! I couldn’t stay hard for shit, pretended to cum and everything just to get it over with. I didn’t know sex could be so bad!”
Another round of cackles and random bullying comments were made about Y/n among the group of men, at this point Y/n felt worthless. She felt like she failed, she felt dirty and stupid. Everything he’d ever said to her was now being questioned. she swears she could vomit.
“Jesus H, what a waste of a pussy innit? Don’t worry can get some girls lined up for you this weekend. Can trip and have a proper orgy, deserve it after pity fucking that dud.”
“Thank god! Need a good fuck after that nightmare. Line up a good few for me yea?”
Humiliated didn’t even come close to describing how Y/n felt right now. Not only had her boyfriend objectify and completely embarrass her to his friends, she’d just heard first hand that he hated it so much he had faked his orgasm, and was planning to cheat on her with multiple women in less than 24 hours. She was sick, her heart stomped on and her feelings completely crushed. She’d never felt so worthless, stupid, used and disgusted with herself. She had confided in Harry how she was scared to be vulnerable, afraid to be intimate with someone because she wasn’t ready to be so open and bare with another person. Harry had told her how she was worth the wait, how she was beautiful and he loved her but now she knew none of it was real. He’d just wanted to be with a virgin, and he hated the experience.
The vomit crawling up her throat had finally reached her mouth, the girl darting towards the bathroom to empty her churning stomach into the toilet tears springing to her eyes as her body tried desperately to purge out all the hurt yet the waves kept coming.
If anyone had heard her getting sick, they didn’t care since no one even called out her name. The girl didn’t even feel like an actual person anymore, just a defective object who was disposable. She couldn’t be here anymore, the emotional pain starting to manifest into physical symptoms as well. Her head pounding, stomach turning and ears ringing. It took all the energy she had left to shove some of her things into her bag to take back to her flat.
The girl was too humiliated to even face them, to confront Harry or mention what she had heard. She internalized all of it, pulling her hood up and ducking out of the front door silently. She suddenly felt lucky that the living room wasn’t in view of the entry way so she could slip out without detection.
 ----
y/n didn’t bother to leave a not nor text Harry about her departure, making her way on foot to the underground to get home. She hadn’t driven her car there since Harry had picked her up, and she didn’t have any service to get an uber so she opted for the easiest option.
The majority of the train ride she spent with her head down, thoughts racing as she desperately tried to suppress the sobs begging to be let out. she somehow managed to keep it together until she got into her flat, as soon as she shut the door her back was against it pained sobs wracking through her body.
When her bottom finally hit the ground she was reminded of the bruises she’d woken up with on her hips and ass from where Harry had gripped onto her.
Maybe that’s why he made me switch to all fours, he was so disgusted he couldn’t even look at my face. Maybe that’s why he seemed to get angry, I couldn’t make him feel good.
The soreness didn’t even compare to the internal injuries his words had left her with. It was as if she’d been clawed from the inside out, every hurtful word slashed at her organs. Her mind burning with self-hatred, insecurity and disgust towards herself. Y/n had always been insecure, she struggled with body image and confidence since she was a child and this ridicule of her natural state and what was supposed to be special tore her limb from limb.
She didn’t know how long it had been, she seemed to zone out finding herself laying in fetal position on the wood floors of her home. Her back was still pressed into the cold steel door, using what was left of her to stand to her feet and lock it, sliding the chain lock as well just to make sure there would be no chance of anyone disrupting her decent into the void of pain.
She didn’t get much sleep that night, her head wouldn’t stop pounding and her thoughts never eased up. She’d gotten a text from Harry asking where she was, her only sending a simple message saying she was feeling poorly and went home in reply.
Harry left her on read.
It must have been many hours since the sun had rose then set again in the time she’d laid still between her covers. She hadn’t gotten up to use the bathroom or eat. She didn’t feel like a person anymore. She didn’t feel like she held any worth in any sense to anyone, seeing as no one had reached out for her in the hours she’d been MIA, not even the boy who supposedly loved her.
Y/n shifted her gaze to the clock on her nightstand, she then knew it was Sunday. It had been almost an entire 48 hours since she’d moved from her spot and by now she was sure Harry had been balls deep in numerous other women. Women who could give him everything she failed to, women who he desired and could get off with. They must be everything she’s convinced she’s not. Pretty, sexy, desirable, loveable, worthy of Harry’s intimacy. Something he regretted ever engaging in with his own girlfriend.
 ---
It was 10 in the morning on Monday when Y/n’s phone finally dinged. By Sunday night she had managed to drag herself to the bathroom to relieve herself and brush her teeth, yet she only then returned to her bed to lay in a depressed shame filled coma of sorts, she truly felt so heart broken it was like her body was giving up on her.
She caved and looked at the message, feeling another stomp on her deflated heart when she saw it was from Harry-
“you alright? Stopped by your work, they said you haven’t called out but you never showed?”
Y/n had forgotten about her job in her spiral, but even now she couldn’t bring herself to care. She knew she was already on thin ice with her manager for taking so many days off to see Harry preform or visit him on his breaks so it wasn’t a surprise if she got fired. She didn’t care though; she knew if she lost her job she’d be another month late on rent and end up being evicted since she couldn’t scrape together enough for last month either. This would lead to her likely having to move back home with her mother or find a hostile somewhere for women, yet she didn’t care. It seems silly that something as simple as someone commenting on her sexual skills would put her in such a state, but that’s not really the main focal point in her mind.
The thing that hurt most was knowing Harry had only been with her to get to take someone’s virginity, and she’d disappointed him so badly he talked shit about her to his friends and made plans to cheat on her. Harry had completely disrespected, objectified and crushed her, and he didn’t even know she knew but she decided he shouldn’t have to know she knew what he said for him to realize it’s wrong. He’s an adult man who knew full well how hurtful and horrid his comments were about someone he had claimed to love. He should have spoke to her if he felt that way, yet instead he played her and tossed her out like rubbish.
Harry broke her heart, one he’d known was already fragile and timid. He’d still said all those nasty things about her even after the nights he’d let her cry into her chest about how much she hated her body, how bad her self-image and confidence was, the way she felt like she was never good enough for anyone. His actions only confirmed what she’d always feared to be true.
Harry didn’t love her.
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Text
Shindou Yo x reader
Warning: abuse, violence, cursing, hard sex, definitely not for minors.
18+ PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF EVERYTHING UNHOLY DONT READ IF U NOT OVER 18
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Ugly
I opened my front door and was startled when big arms wrapped around my neck. Sobbing in my ear and a chant of sorry’s came out the person’s mouth. They let me go and cupped my cheeks. “YN I’m so sorry. What I did was stupid and unforgivable but please, please, please forgive me. I regret my actions everyday. I regret what I said!” Shindou stared at me, tears streaming down his face. I stayed quiet, stunned that he was at my doorstep even apologizing.
1 week ago
“You fucking bitch! Did you think I wouldn’t find out?!” I was so confused as to what he was talking about. I dodged objects he threw at me. “What did I do?!” I cried, running from him. “Still acting dumb! You’re a sad excuse for a girlfriend! What’s his name?!” He yelled at me. “W-whose name?” I whimpered as he cornered me. “That loser you’ve been fucking with!” He shouted in my face. I covered my face and cowered in the corner of the kitchen. Flinching every time he made any movements. “Who?” I asked again. He kicked my thigh and stepped on my tail. “Stop! Please! I don’t know what you’re talking about! I don’t know any guy.” I cried trying to get my tail from under his boot. “Please Shindou.” I begged him. He added more pressure on my tail and I cried out louder. He was going to break it. He stormed off and left me sobbing on the floor. I tried to lift my tail but it hurt to move it on it’s own. I carefully picked it up and whined at the throbbing pain. He came back with my phone and shoved the phone in my face. I flinched but took the phone with shaky hands. I read the messages and my heart broke. It was my father’s number. I never saved it because he said that the phone he was using was temporary. “Who is that?” He asked, crouching down to my level. “Don’t lie to me.” He warned me. “I-it’s my f-father.” I whimpered. He smacked me across the face. “Try again.” He said. I used all of my strength and pushed him on his ass while I tried to get away. He quickly grabbed the end of my tail. I felt and heard a my tail bone break. I fell and cried out painfully, screaming bloody murder. The tip of my tail dangling loosely and broken. Shindou’s eyes widened when he heard the crack. He climbed over me and covered my mouth. “Shh shh I’m sorry baby. I can fix it.” He said. He pulled my head into his chest and he rocked me back and forth telling me to be quiet.
Present day
“YN say something! Please!” He begged me. “I was wrong, entirely. I want to make it right, please take me back.” He dropped down to his knees and held my hands and he looked up at me. Behind him were discarded roses and a big stuffed bear. “I can’t be without you baby. You flood my every thought, you make my heart pound in my chest. I lost my mind when you left, I’m a mess without you. YN I love you so much. I’d do anything for you. I want to start over.” He pleaded. His hands gripped mine tightly. “You,” it was hard to even speak to him. “You hurt me.” I said quietly. “I know, I know baby. I’m sorry about that.” He stood up and raised my head with his hand. “I’m scared of you.” I confessed. “I know I can be scary at times but I’ll get that under control. I promise. I’ll do better, I’ll be better.” He smiled but his smile dropped when I shook my head no. “YN please don’t say no. You can’t say no. I need you in my life.” His hand held my hand in a crushing grip. I whined and he moved closer. “I love you, you can’t tell me you don’t still love me. You don’t miss me? You don’t need me?” I did still love him, I did miss him, I did need him but I didn’t want to be hurt again. My tail is still recovering, whose to say he won’t break any other bone in my body. “My-“ he cut me off with a kiss. His tongue invading my mouth and his body pressed against mine. He pressed a hand to the back of my head so I wouldn’t move away. His other hand still gripping mine and I used my free hand to try to push him away. It was hard to resist him. I missed him so much. I wondered if he was okay even when I was the one in the hospital. When he pulled away we both panted heavily. “Just say you want me and I’ll be yours again. I’ll be right beside you any second of the day. I’ll protect you, I’ll never hurt you again.” He let go of my hand and rubbed his thumb on my cheek bone. I couldn’t say no, not to him. “You promise?” I asked him. My eyes blurring from my incoming tears. “I promise.” He reassured me. My hand wrapped around his neck as I sobbed into his body. My fingers tugging his shirt slightly. “I brought you some stuff. But I’ll put it in the car. I’ll help you pack.” He kissed my cheek and picked up the roses and bear off the ground. I trailed behind him, I really wanted the big stuffed brown bear. He grabbed my hand and pulled me back to the house. I stayed with my father since he came here to visit before he’d go back to America.
Shindou packed all of my stuff in the trunk while I climbed in the back seat cuddling the bear. The drive was long, my father didn’t live in the city, he wanted something quiet and far. When we got to the apartment it was different. I carried the bear inside and went to the bedroom we shared. He brought my bags in and let me sit on the bed while he unpacked for me. I did feel a little uneasy being in here. The whole apartment made me uneasy as memories of abuse flooded my mind. I watched him organize my clothes and my products. When he was done he came up to me and squatted in front of me. His hands ran up my thigh and loosened my pants. He tugged them and I stood up so he could take them off. “You’re not wearing underwear.” He stated. “I only do when I’m on my period. You told me to.” I replied back. He kissed my thigh and smiled. “I did.” He stood up and lifted my shirt over my head. I shivered from being naked in the cold room. He lifted my head and kissed my nose. “I missed you so much.” He whispered. He wrapped something around my neck and I gasped. He kissed my jaw and I looked down to see a necklace dangling down my chest. It had his name on it. It was gold and I surprisingly liked it. He pushed me onto the bed and took his shirt off. He crawled towards me and pulled me under him. My tail limply moved around his ankle. “You’re mine right YN?” He asked me. I nodded my head in agreement. “You won’t leave me again right?” I shook my head no and he smiled softly. His lips touched mine and his hands gropped my breast. Before he would be rough, aggressive and harsh with his hands. Now he was soft and gentle, touching me firmly. I moaned into the kiss and he pulled away. Trailing his lips down to my breast. Suckin my nipples and squeezing them as if something would come out. I whinced when he bit my left nipple too hard. He kissed it and moved to my other mound. His right hand slid down my naval and cupped my vagina. Using the pad of his finger to rub my clit. “Mmm.” I moaned softly. I stared at the ceiling as he touched my body. I didn’t know what to do. He’d usually have me tied up as he pounded me. This time I could move, I could touch him back. He wasn’t rough and he didn’t hurt me. Shindou sat up and pulled his pants down with his underwear. Exposing his dick. He flipped me over and pulled my ass to his face as he laid back. His cock soft and in my face. I moaned when his tongue licked my clit. His fingers teased my hole and his mouth played with my clit. When I looked down his dick was getting erect. Slowly twitching and becoming hard. I grabbed it gently and pumped it a few times before licking the tip. My tongue swirled over the tip and slowly sucked more of him in. Moaning at the taste of his skin, the warmth of his cock and the thickness that would soon make my jaw ache. I jumped when he slapped my ass, “Mmph!” I gagged and sucked more. My head bobbing up and down as he fingered me. His thumb vibrating on my clit and his finger rubbing my g spot. I was going to cum soon. I moaned over his dick and he let out deep grunts and groans of pleasure. My cheeks hollowed and my jaw almost tightened around his cock when he bucked up into my mouth. “I missed you so much baby. Ah, keep sucking Daddy’s dick. Yeah just like that. Nngh.” He said under me. His hips repeatedly thrusting up into my mouth making me gag. His tip hitting the back of my throat. “Oh fuck! You want my cum so bad don’t you? Nnngh! You first.” His fingers began to vibrate as he thrust them in my pussy. “Mmmmnnn!” I tried to focus on sucking but the pleasure was too much. Before I could even lift my head his leg pressed my head down further making me take all of him. My nose in his balls and my chin touching his pelvis. I couldn’t breathe and he fucked his fingers in me faster, his thumb circling my clit. I gagged, choked and moaned over him. My eyes rolling back as I felt my orgasm approaching. “You gonna cum? Go on.” He commanded. My hips stuttered and my eyes rolled back. I fucked back on his fingers.
Shindou pushed me off, his dick leaving my mouth with a pop sound. “Stay still.” He flipped me onto my back and slapped his dick on my clit a couple of times. “S-shin.” I whimpered his name. “Condom.” I said meekly. He shook is head no. No?! His dick pressed against my entrance. “Not this time. I’m gonna fuck lot of babies into this womb.” He said before he shoved his cock inside me. “Nnngh!” I groaned at the stretch. My teeth clenched and my eyes shut. I didn’t want kids. I hope he was joking, lying, please pull out. His hips slammed down into mine and I held his biceps tightly. “Oh fuck! I’m already so close! So tight for Daddy!” He yelled. His thrust picked up the pace. My eyes shot open and my back arched. “Please! Shin! Hmmm!” He was being rough again. It hurt. I clawed his arm and he groaned. His hands pinned mine above my head. “Please what? You don’t even know what your asking for. All dumb from my cock. No one is going to fuck you the way I do. No one is gonna love you the way I do. You need me. Say it.” He hand forced my face to look at him. My gut hurt each time his cock hit my cervix. “I-I need y-you.” I whimpered trying not to moan. It was painful and pleasurable. “Yes baby. You need me. Need me to fuck you good. I need you too. I need you to be good for me and take my cock.” I wiggled under him, trying to get away. The bed hit the wall repeatedly. I babbled under him, nonsense spewing out of my mouth. “FUCK! This is my pussy! You are mine! Don’t you ever leave me again!” He yelled at me. I cried, hot tears running down my cheek as he pounded me. He stopped and pushed in more. A echoed pop sounded around the room. He groaned and I screamed. “Aww, did that hurt?” He teased. His lips covered mine and he ate up my screams and cries. He hurt me again. His cock passed my cervix and entered my womb. He pulled his head away and shuddered. He breathed through his teeth and squeezed my wrist together. “You got really tight baby. Relax.” He said as he tried not to move. “It hurts! It hurts! Please take it out!” I cried. He ignored me. “Shindou Please! Please!” He moved his hips back and thrust into me. My back arched and my feet kicked against the bed sheets. He let go of my wrist and wrapped his arms around my waist. His dick started to vibrate inside of me. “Cum baby. Cum for Daddy.” He moved slightly. My arousal gushing out as he gave me small thrusts. His hair tickling my nose and his lips leaving hickeys on my neck. My eyes crossed and my teeth clenched, it felt good. Amazing even. The pain brought pleasure I never felt before. My walls fluttered around him. My orgasm hit and my moans were loud. I sucked in heavy breaths as I cried and yelled. His dick kept vibrating, overstimulating me. My legs shook behind him, my arms wrapped around his back, my nails dragged down his back. Leaving red lines and some traces of blood.
He pushed his dick in further and began his previous rough pace again. I clung onto him, the pain coursing through my body but giving me aftershocks of pleasure. “Oh fuck!” I yelled. I felt another orgasm building up. “Come on baby. Make Daddy proud. Cum again.” He picked me up and bounced my body on his dick. “You like that? My beautiful girl. I’m close!” He buried his head in my breast and whimpered as he fucked me. “Daddy, Daddy, Daddy!” I chanted. Shindou grunted and moaned his dick twitching inside me. My body convulsed in his arms as I released my orgasm. A silent cry leaving my mouth. He pulled me off his dick and I squirted on his lap. He bit my neck as he came on our stomachs. He let go of me and flipped me over. He slowly put his dick back in me and held my hands beside my head. “Lift your ass.” He commanded. I lifted my hips up slightly and he bucked his hips into me. “Ah! Ah! Mmnn!” I moaned. “This time I’m going to fill you up. You want that right?” I shook my head no. “No? Yes you do, because I do. I want to see you waddling around with my baby in your belly. Nice an plump with my seed. You’d be a great mother.” He said. I whimpered and cried at the thought of being pregnant. It was too scary to even think about. “No, please.” I said barely above a whisper. My voice failing me after all that screaming and crying. My body was weak and nearly numb. He released one of my hands and spread my ass apart. I heard him spit and I felt his saliva run down my ass hole. I flinched and he put his thumb in my ass. It burned, even if it was just the tip of his finger. “My god, your ass got tighter than your pussy. I can’t wait to fuck you here.” He pulled his thumb out and slapped my ass. I cried into the bed. The echoes of the bed frame hitting the wall emanated around the room. He released my other hand and held my hips. Using the leverage to thrust faster. Moving my hips with his, timing it perfectly to meet my ass with his hips. I drooled into the mattress, my mind completely dumb. I panted like a dog. My tail wrapped around his right arm and he tugged it at the base. “Yes baby. Yes! Oh fuck yeah! Take my cum!” His hips stuttered and I felt his load fill my womb. His hot semen flooding my insides. I came too. Our cum mixing together and spilling down our bodies. He continued to thrust in, pushing his gum further in me. Grinding his hips against my ass to keep it in. He collapsed over me and kissed my neck. Not pulling out at all.
I woke up the next morning sticky and sore. Shindou sleeping on his back with his arm under my torso. I could barely move. When I tried getting up he turned over and pulled me into his chest. “Sleep.” He said as he drifted back off.
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sedated-love · 4 years
Text
ShigarakixReader smut
Fifth post of October!! (lol i’m gonna catch up I swear)
I’ll admit I’m a bit more self conscious of this one lol. It’s not my favorite I’ve written this month but I really tried XD 
TW- Mild noncon, Mild mild break, voyeurism and exhibitionism 
Hope you guys enjoy though! If you like it, please take the time to reblog <3 It helps a ton! Also if you have any suggestions for what I write in the future, please feel free to leave them in my ask box!
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“It’s been centuries since I’ve felt like this, I’m not letting you go that easily.”
You let out a yelp as Shigaraki’s hand entangled in your hair, easily pulling you back against his chest. The god’s breath was ragged as he held your hair tightly with one hand, the other holding his abdomen where you had wounded him in your attempt to escape.
Thick black blood oozed from the wound and his red eyes were glowing with rage as he led you by your hair further into the temple. You had to stumble after him to keep yourself from being dragged as he made it abundantly clear that you would be following him whether it was on your feet or not.
“L-Let me go!”
Your head was starting to throb from the rough treatment from the god and your hands instinctively grabbed and clawed at his wrist, trying to lessen the pressure but he didn’t allow for it. He easily used your hair to toss you against the wall of the corridor as sharp hiss escaped his lips.
Pain immediately dispersed through your back as it collided against the wall and you went limp as you hit the ground. Your entire body was aching, and you had a feeling as Shigaraki stalked closer to you that it was only going to get worse. You always knew your god wasn’t merciful, but you never imagined he would have fallen in love with you.
“You signed your contract, mortal. It’s about time you followed through with it.”
Soft sobs left your lips as grabbed you by the arm, forcing you up to your feet with his inhuman strength. His red eyes eating you alive as they dragged along your trembling frame. “You sold your soul and body to me…remember~?” You could hear the sadistic smirk in his voice without even having to look at him, wishing that you could forget.
You had come to his temple late one night and begged him to sign a contract with you. You were sick of the human world and you were convinced that you wanted to be immortal. You had always heard such great stories of the gods and how their lives were never brandished with human troubles like lack of food or wealth. You wanted that for yourself…and you got it.
“You’re mine now so submit to me~ Stop fighting me, and all of your pain will cease~”
He purred as he cradled you close to his chest, his voice becoming soothing as if he were a completely different person than just moments before. You could feel the rage building up inside of you as he touched you as he pleased so easily. You knew that you did this to yourself, but you couldn’t help but fight back as your immortality wasn’t worth this to you.
You slapped him before you even realized that your hand was moving. The red mark that immediately appeared on his face being the indication that told you that you had clearly fucked up. His calm demeanor was quick to melt as he clicked his tongue in annoyance, his red eyes glaring daggers into your soul as he grabbed you by the top of the head so roughly it felt like he was planning on crushing your skull with just one of his hands.
Soft whimpers of pain left your lips as you had a feeling in your gut that you were going to die. You knew that the god had fallen for you but Shigaraki loved you about just as much as a god could love anyone. The tight grip of his fingers slowly squeezing down on your skull was enough to fill your vision with black spots and your heart pounded painfully against your rib cage. You reached up and weakly dug your nails into his arm as if that were going to do anything at all to the god.
“U-Um…my lord…”
His hand paused as his attention was dragged to the servant who was now kneeling beside the two of you as if you weren’t bloodied and bruised, about to be killed. “what is it, peasant? I’m busy.” His tone was clearly annoyed as his eyes dragged back down to where you were wincing in pain under his tight grasp.
“You’re late for your meeting with the other gods…my lord…”
Shigaraki clicked his tongue softly. His distaste for being interrupted was prominent with the way he looked down at you as if genuinely considering blowing off the meeting all together, just to finish what he has started. That is until a sadistic smirk smeared itself on his face as he got an idea. You knew just from the sight of it that whatever he was planning wasn’t going to end out well for you. Just thinking about what sick things he’s planning made you want to hurl and if you had anything in your stomach, you may have.
“I’ll force you to realize who you belong to~”
He easily tossed you over his shoulder so that you could punch and kick all you want but it wouldn’t lead to anything as he made his way towards the meeting center. You had heard of Shigaraki going to such meetings before but you were always pretty sure there was a no mortal allowed rule but if that was the case, the god obviously didn’t care as he walked in the room with you still kicking and screaming over his shoulder, acting nonchalant as if you weren’t even there.  
“What’s the meaning of this?”
You heard the other gods pipe up as you were shoved on your back on top of the round table in the center of them. Anxiety filled your gut when you could see the sheer multitude of different gods who surrounded it, ranging from many you have heard before and some that you haven’t. Shigaraki roughly held you in place, not that it mattered as you were frozen from pure fear.
You had a hard-enough time dealing with one of the gods. You didn’t even want to begin to imagine dealing with them all. “I’m breaking my bitch in~ Showing them who they belong to” His eyes never left your body as you felt your blood run cold when he said that. You had no idea what he was planning but just from that you knew it couldn’t be good.
“Humans aren’t allowed in this meeting, Shigaraki.”
“She won’t be mortal for long.”
He easily ripped off all your clothes, leaving you naked and exposed in front of the entire room of immortal entities. You were left with your face flushed bright red in embarrassment as large powerful hands roamed your body possessively. “You wanted to fight me, little one? I’ll show everyone here who you belong to…including you.”
He leaned down, starting to mark every inch of you that he could get his mouth on. Hickeys or bites, it didn’t matter to him. If it bled, he simply lapped up the blood and kept going as he made sure that no on in the room could look at a single inch of your chest and stomach without seeing exactly who owned you.
You couldn’t help but let out pitiful mewls as he marked you. As much as you didn’t want to admit it, the rough bites had your toes curling slightly and the fact that everyone in the room was just watching you, somehow made it all the more erotic. You wanted to curl away and hide from all the peering eyes but there was no where to go. You were completely trapped under their gaze.
Shigaraki had his hands firmly placed on your hips, making it so you couldn’t leave even if you wanted to and there was certainly no where to hide as you laid on the table, on full display for all of the gods in the room like some sort of sick entertainment.
“M-My lord…”
Your voice came out more as a whimper than you would like to admit as your hands went to entangle in his hair but he grabbed both of your wrists in one of his hands before you could manage to touch him. “Learn your place.” He shoved your hands above your head, not giving you any warning whatsoever before he shoved all of himself inside of you. Your back arched off the table as you let out a loud moan as you felt the harsh sting of being stretched around his cock with no preparations.
Your body twitched pitifully underneath him as your felt your breath hitch. You hadn’t even noticed that he had gotten himself out until it was too late. He was already pushed all the way inside of you, pressing against your deepest and most sensitive spots as he stood above you with that same sick smirk on his face that he always seemed to have.
A part of you wanted to fight back but there was something about him that had you completely submitting for him. Even when he wasn't touching you or holding you down, it was like the sheer size difference and aroma of him had you bearing your neck like an omega to the god.
He didn’t even bother letting you adjust before his hips started jerking, humming in approval at how your tight walls seemed to be pulling him in. “Do you get off on everyone watching you, motral~?” He pressed his hand down on your gut, so you were forced to feel his thick cock thrusting deep inside of you.
“I can feel your walls pulsating around me~ You like this as much as I do, huh~?”
You wanted to deny it but how could you when you were moaning every time he pushed inside. Lewd noises started to fill the room, making you even more embarrassed since everywhere you looked were just another pair of eyes watching you completely fall apart on his cock. He roughly grabbed your chin when he noticed your attention wandering elsewhere, a soft purr leaving his lips.
“Keep your eyes on me, little one~ I’m the one making you feel good, afterall~”
His hips pounded into you with inhuman speed and strength as you felt yourself completely fall apart. Pleasure was boiling in your stomach and even as you weakly quivered underneath him, there was nothing you could do besides lay there and take it. “I-I’m gon..na…cum…~!”
You didn’t even recognize your own needy and pitiful voice, but the god never slowed down. Even as you felt the pleasure bringing you over the edge and your body jerked from the euphoric feeling of your own orgasm, his hips just kept pounding roughly inside of you as he made it excruciatingly clear that you weren’t going to be done until he was.
You honestly couldn’t tell if it had been an hour or multiple as your brain got muddled from the pleasure. Drool ran down your chin as you lost track of the number of times you had cum. The pleasure had become overwhelming, but his hips didn’t slow down or stop for a second as Shigaraki continued to fuck you well past your human limits. You had honestly forgotten about the rest of the gods in the room as all your brain could focus on was the one above you who was turning your insides to mush.
“Who do you belong to~?”
He purred softly as he stroked your cheek in a seeming loving manner, his hips still roughly pounding into yours as he broke you in front of everyone. Your cheeks were stained with tears that had been caused by the over stimulation and your body was completely limp, marked practically everywhere you could see with bruises, bitemarks or hickeys. “Y-Yo..u…” Your voice cracked as you sobbed out your reply, feeling yet another orgasm approaching but you had cummed so many times at this point that it was almost painful.
Shigaraki snapped when he heard your reply. Until now his thursts were rough and fast but steady but when you finally submitted yourself to him, he became almost feral. Loud snarls clawed from the back of his throat as he pounded into you at a blinding rate. Your vision went white from pleasure as he forced another orgasm to course through your body.
Your back arched off the table as your let out loud sobs of pleasure as your body was practically used as a cock sleeve for Shigaraki in front of everyone. He started biting down on your neck and shoulders with animalistic growls, only lasting a few more thrusts before he was pumping his cum deep inside of you.
Your body trembled from the over stimulation as the god filled you to the brim, stretching you full of everything he had but he never moved to pull out, not wanting you to leak out a single drop of what he had gifted you. Afterall, a god’s cum was the gift of immortality. You couldn’t die as long as you had a part of him inside of you and he was going to make sure that you never went a day being empty again.
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knightorchids · 3 years
Note
22 for hand holding !!
Thank u for the prompt anon! This was my first time writing angsty middle of the war catradora so i hope i did okay!!
Hand holding 22 – grabbing the other’s hand to pull them back from something
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Their fights were a flawless routine at this point. A snarky quip here, a dodge of the blade there, the swipe of sharpened claws through the air as they inevitably scraped against She-Ra’s sword. To some, this routine may have become boring. They may have moved on to try something new and left the other behind, perhaps to dance on their own or find a new partner.
But not Catra and Adora.
Every word spat at each other, every hit landed – it meant something. Their moves were calculated. There was a routine, a dance, one they knew by heart and they stuck to it.
Today, however, was different. Today Adora decided to break the mould and try something new. It threw Catra when there was a flicker and buzz of light around She-Ra and suddenly, she was faced with Adora. It was always She-Ra. The routine was She-Ra, not Adora. It was easier to fight She-Ra. Catra could separate She-Ra from Adora every time her claws scraped through her flesh or she picked a well-worded sentence that left a verbal blow that hurt more than a physical one.
Catra took a step back when Adora took one forward.
“Aren’t you sick of this?!” Adora started.
“What?”
“Us! Fighting! I can’t keep doing this, Catra. I can’t keep fighting you.”
“Well, you don’t exactly have much of a choice.”
“There could be.”
Catra folded her arms, defending her fractured heart where it sat in her chest beating rapidly at a conversation she didn’t want to be having.
The pause between them felt eternal.
“There’s not.”
Adora won’t let Catra shut it down. Of course. They’re as stubborn as each other. “You’re the one with the power to change that choice, Catra. It’s not too late for you. I know you. You can still join the rebellion. With me.”
Catra scoffed at the offer, “Or, how about this, Adora. You don’t know me. You could just stop being She-Ra. You could admit defeat. I’d say come back to the Horde but I think I made it pretty clear I don’t want you to.”
Adora’s arms flew out to her sides as she took another step forward. This time Catra held her ground, claws digging into the dirt along with the flesh of her arms.
“I don’t get it! Why are you so dead set on staying with the Horde?! You hate it there. They treat you horribly. Why do you want to stay?!”
Catra’s frown deepened. “They don’t treat me horribly anymore, Adora. Do you know why?” Catra stepped close enough to push the tip of her claw against Adora’s chest. She pressed hard enough to prick. “Because you left. You leaving made space for me to take up an opportunity that never would’ve happened with you there. I would never have made Force Captain with you around. I would’ve been stuck as just another grunt. Your little sidekick until we got to the top. And even then we wouldn’t have been equals!” Catra shoved Adora as her anger rose. “I told you that you leaving was the best thing to ever happen to me. Did you think I was lying?!”
“Yes!” Adora shoved back. “Of course I did! Do you really think I wanted to believe that you never wanted me around?! That you weren’t just saying those things in the Crystal Castle just to get a rise out of me?! Just to hurt me?! I’d never want to believe that’s really you, Catra because I mi–”
Adora cut herself off, fists clenching as she looked away. Catra’s gaze was becoming too hard to hold. All of this was becoming too hard.
“Because what, Adora?”
Adora’s shoulders slumped as she sighed heavily, “Nothing. It doesn’t matter. There’s no point in saying something I know you’ll mock me for.”
Catra tried not to let the sting affect her. Though she can’t help but let her own poison run through her veins. The poison of her own cruelty that Adora now just assumed. Catra didn’t know how to respond, so she left Adora to continue through the building hum of something in the distance that made Catra’s ears twitch.
“You’re better than the Horde Catra, I wish you could see that.”
Catra hissed in response, her ears still latching onto the sound of the evergrowing hum. Adora was still ranting at her when recognition set in – cold and hard and deep in her bones. The hum grew and grew, morphing into a blinding blast that shot out the canon of a Horde tank. Its target? Adora.
“–this because you’re smart and strategic and agile. You’d be invalu–”
It was instinct, Catra realised, when she grabbed Adora’s hand. The yank so hard that it cut Adora off and sent them both tumbling to the ground milliseconds before a laser shot through the air right where Adora had been stood. It felt like slow motion as they fell. Catra’s hand was still a death grip around Adora’s as her heart pounded and lungs froze halfway through a breath before her back slammed into the dirt and kicked up dust around their slumped forms. It was when Adora’s body crashed into her own that the remaining air in her lungs was sent flying outwards with a wheeze.
For a long, painful, moment that was full of deep, relieved breaths they just lay there – until Adora pushed herself up from where her face was buried in Catra’s neck.
Their wide eyes locked, and they stared.
How could they look away after that? After what Catra had just done. A million questions flew through Adora’s mind as Catra’s own drew blank. What the hell had she just done?
The closeness left them speechless. The heat of each other’s bodies, the proximity between their faces – heat coloured both their cheeks at the easy reminiscence their current position left them with as their minds flashed back to nights in the Horde lay together in Adora’s bunk, huddling close during the cold nights in the Fright Zone.
Scenario after scenario soon began making their appearance in Catra’s head while her eyes remained glued to Adora’s, her brain short-circuiting when it briefly locked onto a scenario that involved Adora’s lips. Her whole body buzzed with the anticipation of it, of what could have been, what she knows can’t be, so – she shook off the feeling and forced herself to be the one to snap them out of it.
“Get off me!” Catra yelped, her voice cracking as she resisted the final squeeze she wanted to give to the hand still clamped in her own. Catra shoved Adora back with a grunt, watching as she almost lost her footing before steadying herself on the uneven ground.
Adora scoffed, her arms jumbled and flailing like her thoughts, “You’re the one that saved me!”
“I didn’t save you.”
“Yes, you did! You saw that tank. You pulled me out of the way. You saved me…” Adora stood stunned for a moment, “Why did you save me?”
Catra felt sick at the question. Did Adora really feel she had to ask that?
Catra’s gaze dropped, looking anywhere but at Adora. The shame was too much. “I told you I didn’t–”
“Save me. Yeah, I know. Keeping lying to yourself, Catra, but you know that you did. You proved my point that there’s good in you.”
“We would’ve both got hit if I hadn’t moved us. Don’t think this was some act of kindness, Adora. It was for my own benefit.” Catra folded her arms as she spoke. It was easier to lie when she closed herself off. She could see it in Adora’s eyes though, she didn’t believe a word of it. Adora always tried to see the good in people. To a fault. Isn’t that part of what broke them?
“If I was She-Ra – would you have done the same?” Was a question Catra wasn’t expecting. It left her with an opportunity. One to change how Adora saw her now. She could give her hope in this moment, or she could crush it.
Catra hated false promises.
“I don’t know.” Is what she said.
Yes, of course. Even when you’re her, you’re still you – is what she wanted to say.
Adora’s face dropped. Catra hated the sight of it.
“Because I would’ve been fine, right? Because it wouldn’t have affected She-Ra like it would’ve me?”
Catra kept her face blank when she replied.
“If that’s what you want to let yourself think.”
Catra watched the crease of Adora’s brow grow, the slump of her shoulders, the disappointment and pain in her eyes. Catra’s gaze fell past Adora’s shoulders. A bunch of trees was far easier to look at than the expression on her face.
Adora’s lips parted for a moment as if she were about to say something. She didn’t. Instead, she turned away. The routine was done for the day. The crescendo of the dance had risen and fallen and Adora had walked away.
Catra wasn’t sure whether Adora could feel her eyes boring in her back. She didn’t care. She couldn’t look away. So she prayed Adora wouldn’t look back.
She didn’t.
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peaches-writes · 4 years
Text
unbothered
member: minho genre: fluff, college au  wc: 1.2k warning: explicit language note: tried a mirror-ish format + i have one more hyunjin short fic before i commit to my september special & jisung series hehe
you
“Chan?” Minho repeats curiously, sipping his Americano more slowly, as if you’ve just casually dropped what is most probably the biggest bomb of your entire college career—even bigger than the one time you signed up to a summer study abroad two days before the deadline for submission of documents. “You’re going on a date with Chan?”
“Yeah? No?” You half-shrug as casually as you can while you sip your own coffee order across the table, the words unintentionally coming out in a questioning tone while you try to figure out if you actually heard disbelief in his voice. “It’s a study date, though, so not that kind of date...study session, there so it doesn’t sound weird.”
You've long shifted your eyes away from your phone displaying your text message history with your supposed ‘date’ in question to your best friend in front of you, trying to read, well, anything readable about his current reaction, honestly.
From what you can observe, Minho has barely moved an inch in his seat, eyebrows furrowed contemplatively and his free arm crossed over his waist to support his hand that holds his reusable cup to his lips as he’s been for the past two minutes. He doesn’t seem fazed at all. Of course, you think to yourself, why are you expecting more from him, anyway?
“Why?” Minho asks after a moment, snapping you out of your daze.
You clear your throat when you accidentally choke on your iced coffee for literally no reason (definitely not because Minho’s prodding tone made your delusional heart skip a beat), holding your other hand with your phone to your chest as you do so. When you feel like you could speak again, you answer, “Paper for Professor Yang’s ArtAp class.” You sit up straighter, adjusting your elbows propped on the table, so as to not come off as having just been caught off guard. “It’s pair work so we...paired together.”
“Oh,” Minho purses his lips and nods, placing his reusable cup back on the table now that it’s starting to perspire. “okay.” 
You look at him expectantly. He usually asks more like where you’re going, what time you’re going, what you’re wearing; sometimes even teases that he should come along. “That’s all you’re going to say?” 
He raises his eyebrows at you now. “Yeah...‘okay.’” He chuckles in amusement. “What else do you want me to say?” 
You hum awkwardly, though you wanted to point out a lot of things. “Nothing...I guess.” You shake your head.
You see Minho looking around anywhere but you when he doesn’t continue the conversation, a habit he does whenever he’s thinking of something else to say. Your breath catches in your throat when you place your own cup down and receive another wave of spam messages which seems to have prolonged Minho’s thinking time at hearing your ringtone.
chan: almost forgot
chan: but can we pass by the fine arts studios tomorrow?
chan: will just drop by to see my s/o! 
chan: see you! [sent 4:49 PM]
“So, what’s the paper about?” Minho decides on asking after you’ve closed your phone, catching onto you. You’re quick to notice that he doesn’t bother leaning over the table and peering over your phone like he usually does but you’re quick to dismiss this and conclude that it’s because he must’ve naturally assumed that it’s still Chan who’s messaging you as he’s been for the last five minutes.
“We’re supposed to visit an art exhibit or museum and make critique papers of recently-made art pieces.” You answer plainly, sliding down comfortably in your seat once again.
"And where are you planning to go?” 
“The National Museum.”
“Oh.” Minho muses, in a tone that’s quick to lay the topic to rest. “Cool, cool.” 
When you don’t speak, opting instead to take more sips of your coffee, he continues, “Have fun—have fun on your study date then.” 
“Session.” 
“Whatever.” Without you looking, Minho rolls his eyes in annoyance. 
You groan internally. You’ve really had it with this guy, seriously. 
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him
“Chan?” Minho tries his best not to sound anything but nonchalant as much as possible, sipping his Americano more slowly. There’s a small sting in his chest but he quickly dismisses it as the cool feeling of his coffee order, too invested in your conversation now to worry about his instinctive physical reactions. “You’re going on a date with Chan?”
“Yeah? No?” You half-shrug, clearly unsure in your tone of voice. “It’s a study date, though, so not that kind of date...study session, there so it doesn’t sound weird.”
Isn’t that the same thing? A million questions flow into Minho’s train of thought as he remains frozen in his seat. He’s mindful of his reaction in front of you now, keeping his eyebrows from furrowing too much in thought, biting the inside of his lip to stop himself from pursing them together in annoyance, and tapping on his reusable cup and his side so as to not accidentally crush the material with his sudden death grip or chuck your phone out of the window; fortunately, he’s mastered coming off as unbothered to you now after months of you endlessly trying to get a reaction from him and you don’t seem to notice even as he catches you eyeing him carefully. 
So after a while, he decides to humor you and ask, “Why?” 
You clear your throat when you accidentally choke on your iced coffee for literally no reason which makes Minho smirk unintentionally (and thus briefly breaking character). “Paper for Professor Yang’s ArtAp class.” You answer after a moment, adjusting in your seat. “It’s pair work so we...paired together.”
“Oh,” Minho lets himself purse his lips and nod, placing his reusable cup back on the table when he accidentally claws on it. “okay.”
You look at him expectantly. “That’s all you’re going to say?”
And he raises his eyebrows at you in response, stifling another giveaway smirk. “Yeah...‘okay.’” He chuckles. “What else do you want me to say?”
You hum awkwardly, unconsciously swaying from side to side before shaking your head. “Nothing...I guess.” 
With that, Minho decides on humoring you further and purposely doing his habit of looking at his surroundings in thought. While he does this, he catches you receiving another spam of messages from Chan from the corner of his eyes, slightly irritating him but not enough for him to break character for the second time. 
I’ll have to smack Chan later for conspiring against me, Minho thinks to himself with an internal sigh before turning to you once you’ve closed your phone and asking, “So, what’s the paper about?” 
“We’re supposed to visit an art exhibit or museum and make critique papers of recently-made art pieces.” 
"And where are you planning to go?”
“The National Museum.”
“Oh.” Minho muses in a tone that’s quick to lay the topic to rest now that thinking more about it is starting to get on his nerves. “Cool, cool.”
When you don’t speak, opting instead to take more sips of your coffee, he continues, “Have fun—have fun on your study date then.”
“Session.”
“Whatever.” Without you looking, Minho rolls his eyes in annoyance, opening his phone and going straight to messaging Chan. 
minho: y r u going on a date w y/n???
minho: that’s my job !!!
minho: well future job 
chan: chill bro it’s not that kind of date
chan: i alr have an s/o rmmbr [sent 5:02 PM]
Oh, right, Minho slowly closes his phone and places it back on the table in embarrassment, exchanging it for his Americano and taking another long sip, well shit. 
m.list
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