#u know sometimes i say i cried and i didnt actually cry i just teared up but this time i genuinely cried LMAO

[lunetual]

girls it’s bad out here today i just watched ki’s mubank facecam and they left on a section at the beginning where he banters and sings with the crowd and his FACE listening to the mbbs sing every word......... reader i cried

[jayflrt]

hi im back i swear i could talk ab iland for hours fr ...

smth i wanna talk ab is their friendships on the show and moments that i think ab A LOTTT

- heeseung and jungwon!! i think they grew close very early on esp bc they were in iland together from the start and u could see how sad hee was when jungwon almost got emiminated. like boy was in tears SOBBING when jungwon came back from that dam egg and i felt in that moment u could rlly see how much jungwon meant to him and he couldnt lose him

- JAY AND NIKI like when jay came back to iland and cried that niki didnt make it 😭 they were THAT DUO™️ in the ground stressing out teaching everyone fire. i think they were the perfecr pair to lead bc they both had an insane amount of passion and determination like niki was one of the only ones that understood why jay wanted them to keep practicing and not fall behind bc they both knew how much was on the line. they were also on the same team multiple times which caused them to grow close and the fact that jay was one of the ones who could speak japanese so niki definitely clung onto him and jay would help him out a lot :')

- SUNOO AND JAEBEOM. one of the most purest friendships on the show i swear. they experienced ground and iland together and in the behind cams THEY LOOKED LIKE THEY WERE GOSSIPING ALL THE TIME IT WAS SO CUTE. and the fact that sunoo used one of his calls to call jaebeom omg 😭 theyre probably still friends til this day since sunoo cherishes all of his friendships i rlly need them to vlog tgth or smth i miss them sm

- sunoo and taki 😭 when sunoo said he wanted taki as a real little brother I SOBBED. i think another anon talked ab them so i wont get into it much but im so happy theyre still close and we see them interact a lot

- enha 02z omg. iland is where jakehoon rlly took off and it was so endearing to witness their friendship blossom on the show. and jayhoon ☹️☹️☹️ i love every jay duo in enha but jayhoon (and heejay) takes the cake for me. when sunghoon worried more about taking jays place during the dance unit over winning it showed how much their friendship means to him. and when jay says the iconic line "my one and only unit" LIKE THEY ENTERED ILAND TOGETHER AND DEBUTED TOGETHER IT CANT BE MORE PERFECT THAN THAT. and during pt. 2 i loved how in the behind cams we got to see all 3 of them get closer and become the iconic 02z trio we know and love today (im just so happy they all got to debut together it was seriously fate)

- jay and k. so yes, k was really bad on the show and his competitiveness got the best of him. it was sad to watch how he treated other ppl sometimes and i'll say hes grown from it and is in &team now and takes care of the members well. (i watched &audition and his character development was crazy so good for him) but in iland u can tell how much jay really values k as an older brother. jay was one of the older contestants so he probably felt like he had to shoulder a lot and be a leader but when k is around i feel like he got to relax a little more yk? and as we know enha and esp jay dont really have many friends outside of the group (besides sunoo) and im glad theyre still very close til this day.

sorry this was so long u fr opened the floodgates for me skdjs

HELLO !! feel free to 🤝 i love talking about iland (i am hyperfixated)

omg yes there were so many cute friendships that i wish mnet covered more !! :( jungwon and heeseung were so meant to be friends like 🥹🥹 omg in the ghost episode when jungwon slept in heeseung's bed was the first time i realized that he rlly lets himself be a kid around hee 🥰 NO YEAH MY HEART BROKE THAT EPISODE 😭 heeseung's sobbing actually hurt me holy shit i hate mnet for what they put those boys through

omg i felt so sad when jay went up without riki and started crying into k's shoulder 😭 ALSO WHEN JAY DID HIS MASSAGES FOR EVERYONE LOLL i definitely feel like jay jake riki and sunoo (and daniel) grew a lot closer in ground but i was so soft for jayki:') 💘💘 OMG YES SUNOO AND JAEBEOM WERE SO CUTE i just feel like they matched each other's energy so well !! i wish iland showed more interactions because jaebeom clearly had gotten close with more ilanders (sunghoon nominating him for parts, them using sunoo's call to call jaebeom) but i think mnet just focused on the drama + training + a few select friendships

that part where taki was crying on his way to ground and sunoo held his hand and walked him to the building ☹️☹️ they were too cute!!! but yes i remember their pictures together from hanging out n im so happy they're still close 🥰 omg "my one and only unit" changed the trajectory of my life forever like it's been my bio for two years now because of how insane of a hold it has over me 😵‍💫 02z were so so cute :')) part of the reason why i was so sad that ej got eliminated in pt 1 but we got so many cute jaykehoon moments 🥹💖 the entire ghost episode made me ADOREEE them like jake and sunghoon going everywhere together and pranking jay in the bathroom,, then their little dispute "i'll walk you to your room and then we'll walk to mine" "you cant even walk to your room by yourself??" and then jake getting all riled up and saying he could only to run back to sunghoon 😭😭 AND JAY AND JAKE SAYING THEYD SHOWER TOGETHER BC THEY WERE SO SCARED 😭🤚

omg yes jay was so cute around k he let himself be a little brother 🥹🥹 i think he needed that person he could go to and be vulnerable because he tried to put up a strong front a lot of the time and was under so much pressure 🤧 literally cried at the part of him writing all of those letters with his mosquito bitten hands :(( omg yeah i wanna know if enha have more idol friends HAHHA i know heeseung's friends with jeongin, beomgyu, and lim jimin and i know a few members are friends with tnx members OH and shotaro and riki are friends 🥰🥰💖💖

HAHAH no need to apologize i feel insane over iland friendships too 😵

[pinkseas]

GOOD EVENING NIGHTY TO U ALYYY I HOPE YOU'LL HAVE A NICE SLEEP SOON or now as i type this immediately after. ur answer because i am in the Mood like YEEHAW anyway FIRST OF ALL SIRMA'AMMX SHANNON i hope u have the bestest day too like that is both Embarrassing and an honest surprise theres someone else reading our convos at all and i did,... stumble on this one comment someone wants to read more of my xiao deadge brainrot weve been throwing back and forth that u replied (more like me crying u crying back i wipe ur tears still crying cus its all from me my fault i did this to myself) and im like SHYYY but its all out in the open on tumblr anyway so we just. yeah. YeaghHFHEHDKDJFHDHHFHDJDJFH dies in a corner cutely PATCHES THE ONLY EVER that we can trust in the most honest answers regarding blake rwby and xiao genshimpact her words only that we hold like the bible amen 🙏

"i have sm respect for it esp as like a genuine coping mechanism and i cant really speak on fics for it but the thought of xiao specifically as a character regressing is so ??? i get it in Theory but in Practice." NO BUT I GET YOU i think the interpretation can still. maybe. be put into a good way though I Cant Really See It but if whoever does esp the fics then u cant rlly debate their reason its like any other screwed up hc ppl do so yknow!! "sometimes u just gotta write fics where you baby the fave and i look away from those in general out of personal preference but i am especially looking away from ones where its xiao" with all u wrote after like i can see the point of Babying Xiao but not him going actual baby and das not good at all,... cus all i do think abt esp if zhongli treats him is those two fics i told u that gets me so hard of the old man's willingness to care for him and how hes so gentle and patient and akfkfjshhxhshdh like THAT is the type of babying but not babying i can get by like YKWIM

"there's a difference between treating someone gently knowing their strength and capability and choosing to be soft regardless in a good, respectful way, VS flat out ignoring that persons capability and strength and treating them like glass and truly believing that they could shatter at any moment if thought of any differently." im gonna be fr i did use the second option but OFC ZHONGLI DOESNT IGNORE its the fact he Knows xiao can still be,... so fragile. like (skids back like im wearing socks sliding on marble floor) ur fic where lumine holds him like shes holding the world and he cries and cries and she holds him regardless,... that type of fragility. i dont know if you rmb me talking this but i mentioned abt some other brainrot abt xiao trying to move on after the events of the chasm and how the crew And lumine And zhongli play a part of it but i didnt say that while everyone has at least a piece of their worldview given to him abt grief and loss its ultimately abt xiao and zhongli going through their conflict of each other way back since rex lapis' death,... and in the end when they resolve it, xiao had been so. so fragile. like everything reaches his breaking point and he breaks. he misses the past he misses devoting his only purpose to rex lapis whos not rex lapis anymore he misses bosacius he misses his siblings he misses the adepti he couldnt even mourn properly. and zhongli lets him mourn. and its that moment where he cries it rlly shows how small he is to the world yknow. THAT kind of guilt of acting like a child but for a person like xiao that he genuinely doesnt realize nor have the power to stop it. (and all ur comments after it jsut hits so HARDDD SO REALL)

"I JUYST WROTE LIKE A WHOLE PARAGRAPH but it was super fucking rambly in a way that made NO sense whatsoever so it is gone now goodbye </3" NO WAY…. NAUR WAY U CANT JUSR DO THAT I WANNA SEE UR WORD VOMIT TO MY WORD VOMIT TOO u said it urself sumtimes u cant get entirely what im saying I GOTTA BE CONFUSED TOO SUMTIMES EQUIVALENT EXCHANGE shakes u like a piggy bank (and like yknow every single i wrote here is unfiltered. like. i just leave in all my nonsensical rambles cus fuck it its not like i can come back to it and it perfectly encapsulates how Not Sane i am in my thoghts and i must Let you Know)

i do not have the words or thoght to respond on the xiaolumi xiao and lumine one bc everythings there already ITS ALL THERE SO BASED SO REAL so. i cant say theyre perfect for each other for the exact reason i see flaw that theyre not. i think. pettiness flowing through me that i personally see their development slow that i dont vibe with others' praises abt how glorious they are as a couple but not in how i see it KFHSHFHEHFJJEJFJ "made for each other" "their souls are fated to be together" can be so Eck to me its funny that it sounds like i hate xlmi too when i can go 30k words on it WAHAHKDJHSH am thinkinf abt ur latest post instead when the two are brought up bc my brain goes fast melts fast like putty i cannot Bother going back sumtimes but i Will Try

"idk how they put up with me fr" NO BUT. NO i also cant believe how you put up with me especially with that many paragraphs and over explaining and extremely specific views of xiao and lumine and zhongli and everyone else i drag in bc i do doubt if i am being so nitpicky abt it when i mention the gnsn commu's common views on it KFHSHFHHSHFH like, being around the community in twt or at least trying to be at the sidelines can be so. draining. that u see sm stuff that contradicts how u think and it makes u a little irritated if not scared u feel like ur the only one with this thought u feel left out. so like. its kinda ironic i found who can get me outside of twt HAJFKSJFJ

"it takes xiao and lumine a long time to develop a very close friendship" has been important to me for a long time since i knew their potential, and ive been doing this even before them like 😭😭😭😭 exploring love in a way that it isnt romantic love. that it doesnt have to be them kissing to make them official, that their close friendship is that fruitful result they grew which makes it personally hard to me that them being a couple and doing sims woohoo feels like its lost entirely for that "new stage in life". and i do take them realistically i do try my hardest to make them make even a little sense bc i want them to be as human as they are, although they were never human in the first place. not just exploring abt live but exploring abt how humanity works in teyvat,... about how to live,... and that matters sm to me ughghhdh post-teyvat where they do kinda maybe be 'official', but thats after all the hardship all the misunderstandings they went during teyvat. during conflict. and once everythings peaceful do they try to let go and make their bond simply work and THATS SO IMPORTANT TO MEEEE

though dont take my pov too heavily bc i did have my moot who knows abt my xlmi views and how i speak them so delicately and aggressively (gentle) passionate that theyre even cautious abt speaking their ideas to me i felt legit bad 💔💔 like SURE THEYRE SUPER IMPORTANT TO ME i would fight anyone who wants to rebuke my ideals but not those who just wants to be around and share the sillies with me like AUGH I HOPE THAT THIS IS EVEN A LITTLE BIT COHERENT TO U SKSKHFJSHFHD 

"me sitting here like a small child drawing them as stick figures holding hands and smiling “and then they were BEST friends <3” I MEAN WITH ALL THE SHT I SAID I DO THIS TOO FR sumtiems u get super analytic like a scientist lookijg thru their science thingamajigs to cure cancer sumtimes you go goofy ahh my blorbos i think theyre very neat tgt and we're so real for that <33333

GOOD MORNING BESTIEEEEEEEE <3333333

"(more like me crying u crying back i wipe ur tears still crying cus its all from me my fault i did this to myself)" NO BC THIS IS SO REAL LITERALLY

"PATCHES THE ONLY EVER that we can trust in the most honest answers regarding blake rwby and xiao genshimpact her words only that we hold like the bible amen 🙏" patches says xiao genshin impact is the only man ever and honestly i agree

"like THAT is the type of babying but not babying i can get by like YKWIM" I KNOW WHAT U MEAN !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

"im gonna be fr i did use the second option but" NO BC LIKE i didnt word that right i know what u mean and like. idk. u dont do it in a bed or weird or disrespectful way yknow ???? you do it Right you do it so fawking well it makes me so insane and for what

"and in the end when they resolve it, xiao had been so. so fragile. like everything reaches his breaking point and he breaks. he misses the past he misses devoting his only purpose to rex lapis whos not rex lapis anymore he misses bosacius he misses his siblings he misses the adepti he couldnt even mourn properly. and zhongli lets him mourn. and its that moment where he cries it rlly shows how small he is to the world yknow" o(-( crying shaking bawling sobbing GODDDDDDD i see it. i see the vision i get it i Understand dear fucking LORD im so. explodes. learning to live for yourself missing the simplicity of the past missing those youve lost it is all So Fucking Hard and for what !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

"shakes u like a piggy bank" DORRYYYYYYYYYY next time that happens i wll just keep the paragraph i pinkie prommy <333333 just for u bestie anything for u bestie

""made for each other" "their souls are fated to be together" can be so Eck to me" BIGGEST HANDSHAKE EMOJI EVER its so weird like sometimes in writing specifically i really love it but its one of those like. i appreciate it when its Not Real but if it were ever real or if ppl ever truly believed that other ppl or any charactesr were 'made for each other' or 'fated' i would expldoea nd die /neg ITS SO WEIRD i cant Properly describe how i love it a lot in specific ways but then hate it so bad in other ways its soooo. man

"i also cant believe how you put up with me especially with that many paragraphs and over explaining and extremely specific views of xiao and lumine and zhongli and everyone else i drag in" are u kidding me ur paragraphsg and explaining are the Best Things Ever In The Whole Entire Universe i adore and cherish it every single time without fail. something something not "putting up with" or "dealing with" just love just care <- doesnt know how words work or how to describe things

everything abt the way u talk abt xiaolumi is so. pleading face emoji x1000000000 im just. smdnfmsdngnfdkg GOD

"like SURE THEYRE SUPER IMPORTANT TO ME i would fight anyone who wants to rebuke my ideals but not those who just wants to be around and share the sillies with me like AUGH I HOPE THAT THIS IS EVEN A LITTLE BIT COHERENT TO U" no i know exactly what you mean dw !!!!!!! and its weird for me specifically/personally bc like. on one hand im still working on The Thing where if Someone I Care About has an opinion thats different from mine my instinct is "oh, my opinion is Wrong and theirs is Right" and that used to be SAURRRRR bad and there's a little bit of influence still BUT!!!! character growth character development i am so much better at keeping my own thoughts and hcs now and not twisting and changing them the split second someone says otherwise...... like the past few months especially ive gotten SO good at it its unreal i feel like an actual person now. and like i fully understand the fear of "oh no what if i make them feel like they cant talk about THEIR thoughts" but w/ us specifically too its like. i love hearing about your thoughts So Fucking Much whther theyre super similar or super different from my own, and partially bc of that i am 100% ok with sharing my own thoughts even if i feel like they're silly or know they'll be different from yours. idk if you were like a Stranger stranger (which is so funny to say all things considered) id probably be all polite but in the bad way where i listened and then agreed and didnt give my own thoughts but its YOU so i give all of my own thoughts i give every thought ive ever had and i feel totally comfortable doing so <- word vomit paragraph bc im delirious but im also too delirious to reword it into somethign more coherent dorry </333

"sumtiems u get super analytic like a scientist lookijg thru their science thingamajigs to cure cancer sumtimes you go goofy ahh my blorbos i think theyre very neat tgt and we're so real for that <33333" REALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL we literally are so real for that. man. i love that for us sm <333

ANYWAYSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS i hope u have been doing well i hope ur day today goes amazingly i hope u get some good rest tonight or maybe during the day idk i hope school stuff is going well and finally if anything goes wrong or bad i am beating it up with my tiny baby fists peace and love goodnight <3

[luffythinker]

Trans Sero + Kiri x Sero anon here I just want you to know I feel really safe talking to you about my Sero headcanons you have made talking to you and reading your answers the highlight of my time, I always can't wait to see your loving reaction to what I have to say and I just wanted to say thank you 💦

Now for my question

What kind of parents do you think Sero has? Like I dont wanna be that usual person who says "oh he has a dad that didnt like him coming out as trans" or "his mom is his only one that comforts him"

My take is that both his parents just really wanted a boy they really wanted a baby boy and when they had Sero they really thought this was gonna be the little boy but life had different plans for little Sero

I'm gonna be calling Sero they them from this point

They arent upset with them they just dont understand it's something Sero isnt able to explain either but being a boy just isnt something they can pretend even for their parents Sero did give it a good try they tried up until UA until they just couldn't do it anymore

Sero would wear boys clothes, try to just be a "boy" and cry in front of the mirror for the shame of their body

came out told them they couldn't be the little boy they always wanted mom and dad didnt understand and Sero couldn't explain it and that's just how it is nobody is mad nobody is upset they are both just confused they dont judge or mistreat they just try to understand even if they dont and Sero can't explain it cause they don't quite understand theirself

It was never their intention to upset Sero but they have another kid Sero has a little brother the boy their mom and dad always wanted and Sero is hurt by that like they tried to replace them that isnt the case but Sero never spoke out about this so nobody knows except Kirishima

I can imagine a scene where Sero tells Kirishima that they are jealous of him, that he can be a boy and they couldn't do it and they are a let down to their parents so bad they had to go and have another kid

Kiri shuts this thinking down so quickly, and it's so beautiful I cant even write it myself I just think about it

On to my real real question that's just a background I guess 😅 idk I'm just thinking hard rn

What kinds of things do you think Kiri would do for his partner that really makes Sero understand it doesnt matter what I look like my golden retriever boyfriend loves me? And I believe Sero isnt a crying type of person takes a lot to get this dude to even tear up(I say dude in the bro way not gender way)

Something Kiri would do that really stuck with Sero like I dont deserve you kind of love something that makes them hug and be so thankful they are in eachothers lives

please, I love u sero anon <3 u can always feel safe to ask or talk to me, I will do my best to indulge in your headcanons, I'm sorry for taking long, but I always try to set time aside to reply, and give proper answers <33

First question first, I'm gonna build into what you gave me here: i think their parents had a difficult reaction during the first couple of years of their coming out, it was really hard for them to understand what being non-binary/trans was, that they "lost" their son in some way, and they just couldn't help with feeling disappointed that their plans and expectations to their "son" wouldn't become reality

But!! I'm a sucker for queer joy, so I would like to think that eventually, their parents realize that it hurts more to see their child distancing themselves from them more every day than actually trying to understand them. So they try... they do some research and start to slowly use they/them pronouns (it's difficult and they mess up sometimes, but the first time they used the set in front of Sero he cried a bit)

Now the second question!! this is really hard to think of, but I think it would be in the small happenings of life, obviously, Sero knows that Kiri respects him and fully understand his identity, but if someday they're walking holding hands and somebody makes fun of him in public, I think Kiri would immediately shut the assholes down and reassures Sero that he doesn't give a fuck about what anyone says

Or during days when dysphoria hits pretty hard and he doesn't feel good in anything, Kiri notices but knows that no words can really help at that exact moment, so he goes out and buys the piece of clothing Sero has been saying he wants to try for weeks! When he gets home and gives it to them and they try it on and something finally feels right, Sero understands that he will never have someone else that loves and pay so much attention to his every detail like this, that's a love for a lifetime

not sure if these are emotional enough but i like to think mundane things are the best to realize how powerful love can be!

[shotosprincess]

♡ dating the bnha boys — hcs

｡･:*:･-: ✧ :,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆ ｡･:*:･-: ✧ :,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆

➪ shoto todoroki

pls you’ve prolly been terrified of him for a while prior bc of how ?? talented ?? the mf is ??

but mans prolly saved you at some point and there was this lingering stare you two shared before he left you at recovery girls’ office; were you reading too far into things ?

spoiler alert: you weren’t.

anYWAYS-

he’s the kind of boyfriend to tenderly brush your hair for you and attempt to learn how to tie and braid your hair up in cute ,, simple designs !!

he’d always be ready with little things you’re constantly forgetting; extra snacks,, water,, a fully charged portable charger ,, trust me when i say that man is pREPARED- after all ,, he needs to be ready with everything to take care of his little sweetheart ,, does he not ?

ONLY TWO POINTS IN AND IM ALREADY CRYING BC I LOVE HIM SM BYE BYE BYE

at some point he’d find you sitting on the roof by yourself late at night,, only to stay with you and let you fall asleep on his chest as he drapes a blanket over you and heats it up a lil with his quirk

OKAY YOU CANNOT TELL ME THAT THAT MAN WOULDNT HOLD THE DOOR OPEN FOR YOU AT ALL TIMES AND WOULD SOMETIMES EVEN GET LOWKEYHIGHKEY KINDA SAD WHEN YOU DONT LET HIM

prolly bc he just wants to prove to you that he can be useful

pls just let the man know he’s useful and important he never shows it directly but he needs the reassurance—

he’d give you a warm massage w his quirk whenever you’re in pain :”)

HIDES AND PROTECTS YOU FROM MINETA BC HE KNOWS DAMN WELL WHAT THAT LITTLE SHIT FANTASIZES ABOUT

loves heating//cooling things for you ,, like instant noodles or ice packs !!

surprises you w jewelry that have his initials on them !!

GIVES THE BEST CUDDLES I SWEAR

would hold an umbrella for u while you loop your arm into his as the two of you walk home through the light rain :”)

cries into your chest sometimes after youve fallen asleep bc it’s late nights like these when he reflects on just how lucky of a guy he is to have you— it’s hard for him to articulate it directly ,, but when he does fully open up to you ab it ,, you end up crying too .

WOULD 110% MAKE THE TWO OF YOU YOUR OWN PERSONAL LIL ICE RINK AND TEACH YOU HOW TO SKATE // DO FUN FIGURE SKATING DUOS WITH YOU

➪ katsuki bakugou

prolly got with you initially bc of a dare ( and he nEVER passes up a dare ) ,, but eventually those feelings started to become real and honestly ? it kinda scared the shit outta him . he didn’t know why ,, but for some reason he didnt actually want to leave .

OKAY LARA JEAN AND PETER MF KAVINSKY TYPE BEAT ( ˘ ³˘)♥︎ HIT US WITH THE FAKE RELATIONSHIP TO REAL RELATIONSHIP TROPE YESYESYES

teasingly-mean nicknames = his love language . enough said .

AGGRESSIVE !! KISSES !! ALL !! THE DAMN !! TIME !!

makes you wear his hoodie whenever you show even the sLIGHTEST hint at being cold

he just rly wants to see you in his clothes

he’s so clueless on how to do this whole boyfriend thing ,, but he’s definitely trying bc it’s for you :”)

watches and tries so desperately to copy all the cute couples in the movies you guys watch together

“ roses...do you want roses ? “ “ what ? “ “ the guy in the movie gave her roses...do you want roses too ? “

but at the end of the day you just appreciate him for who he is and that’s more than enough for you :”)

PLS DENKI AND KIRI ARE CONSTANTLY SHOCKED AT HOW MUCH HE’S TRYING FOR YOU

will take any and every opportunity to show off his strength and quirk to you <3

now we all know this man gets jealous hella easily ,, and its no different w relationships :”) he’d constantly make it a point to hold you extra close to him in public ,, show you off on social media and call you by a nickname//petname whenever possible just to reiterate to ppl the fact that you’re his and he’s yours

WOULD LET YOU SIT ON HIS LAP AND DO HIS EYELINER AT 2AM PURELY BC YOU GOT BORED

pls i could rly see myself doing that i wont lie

honestly sometimes he forgets himself and his temper gets a little out of hand ,, but the second he sees his feral reflection in your fearful eyes,, he pulls you to his chest and apologizes profusely :”))

➪ denki kaminari

MF PROLLY GOT WITH YOU BC OF A RIGGED GAME OF SPIN THE BOTTLE AT MINA’S PLACE I CANNOT SEE ANYTH HAPPENING OTHERWISE

one tiny kiss turned into two ,, which turned into three ,, and before you knew it ,, the both of you were spilling out the pent up feelings you had for one another all this time—

mina never shuts up ab it ,, she’s so proud of her matchmaking skills

when the power goes out during a storm ,, he holds onto you tight and plays w your hair as he uses his quirk to turn things back on ,,, “ shhh it’s ok,, i’m here “

will do anything and everything to make you smile <3

he has a lil album in his camera roll with all his favourite pictures of you ,, which is practically just all of them tbh ♡´･ᴗ･`♡

HE LOVES SHOWING YOU OFF IN THE MOST WHOLESOME WAY POSSIBLE !!

super energetic n bubbly but at the end of your dates he passes out right away in your arms

you make sure to wrap him up in blankets and give him an overload of kisses after he’s rly asleep though

will work embarrassingly hard to win you stuffed animals at the fair !! it doesn’t always work ,, but it’s cute nontheless <3

some of the staff and children at the fairs get pissed off but oh well ,,, what you do for love

pls he prolly makes you lil bento boxes for lunch every now and then ( ESPECIALLY DURING EXAM WEEK ) w tiny notes and designs taped on them

constantly calls you “ shawty “ lowkey un ironically and dice rolls in ur direction whenever he sees you ,,, you just end up laughing and playfully punching him

I JUST KNOW HE DOES THE F BOY LIP BITE FACE CONSTANTLY

ITS AN ADDICTION FOR HIM I SWEAR

SUPER CLINGY BUT IN THE CUTEST WAY AAAA

LIL STICKY NOTE LOVE LETTERS FROM HIM IN YOUR LOCKER EVERY !! MF !! DAY !!!

you both agreed that at home cozy netflix dates w microwave popcorn and fuzzy blankets >>> movie theatre dates

110% made a playlist for you at some point when he crushed on you from afar and shared it w you after you started dating

he made a collaborative playlist for yall AND multiple playlists of songs that remind him of you afterwards

pls i just kNOW this man’s love language is making playlists

theyre prolly all categorized by mood or smth too w the cutest covers ever pls

➪ ejirou kirishima

you initially met him bc he was hella upset and alone this one time and you were the only one to notice and be there for him bc he ran away from everyone else to hide the “ uNmanLy “ tears :”))

takes you w him on his lil gym visits ,, hypes you up with every little thing u accomplish !!

constantly teasing bakugou with how he’s able to pull you and how lucky he is to have you

bakugou gets hella annoyed most of the time and just blasts him away-

idk bro i just feel like kiri prolly calls you “ adorable “ alot i wont lie-

LOVES HAND HOLDING,, takes any opportunity to hold ur hand and trace lil casual patterns across your knuckles w his thumb

sometimes he’ll even draw lil hearts on your hand

play fighting but sometimes the two of you get too carried away and he actually loses half of the time-

LATE NIGHT GAME NIGHTS WITH HIM AND THE BAKUSQUAD,, he loves being on the team against you so he can get all competitive

OK HEAR ME OUT;;;; DANCE BATTLES W HIM AS YOUR PARTNER AGAINST RANDOM PPL AT PARTIES

mans gets hella insecure ab himself sometimes ,, so he loves doing lil things for you !! opening a can ,, pulling the blanket over you ,, zipping up your jacket <33

STOP WAIT THATS SO CUTE BYE I WANT THAT

lets you dye his hair—THATS HOW MUCH HE TRUSTS YOU BYE

pls yall prolly aggressively play wii sports and just dance against one another on a regular basis;; it’s literally your thing and you cannot tell me otherwise ahjdjfj

pls i just KNOW this man’s an overly passionate wii player

will wrap his arms around your waist and hug u from behind as you make breakfast

WOULD WEAR MATCHING EARRINGS W YOU IF ITS FOR YOU

slow dances in the living room at midnight w you !!

eventually as you spent more time together ,,, you were able to change his idea of “ manliness “ ,, and he was able to realize that manliness is not equivalent to stoicism and that expressing ur feelings is still totally manly and totally valid !! <33

[t0shii]

scary video games with hq boys

suna rintaro, kenma kozume, matsukawa issei, hanamaki takahiro, nishinoya yuu, tanaka ryunosuke x gn!r

!warnings! mentions of death, gore, etc. some slight game spoilers but tbh it's nothing major so dw! rlly just fluff! light swearing, nothing major.

pt. 2 here

SUNA RINTARO.

plays scary video games very often & is lq a scaredy cat but never lets it show. he especially likes when u sit in his lap & either watch him play or where ur hugging him w ur cheek smushed against his shoulder. holds u super tight during the scariest scenes

currently you were sitting on your boyfriend rintaro's lap, chin resting on his shoulder while he played the latest resident evil game. at first you were watching him play while sitting beside him but after a while it became too much to watch so you took to moving to his lap for comfort.

you could feel sleep creeping up to you, eyelids droopy, cheek smushed on your boyfriends shoulder, that was until rin's character died and screamed so loud you jolted awake, which seemed to startle the boy.

"sorry baby" he says with a sigh, rubbing your back soothingly, "just a few more minutes and i'll be done." to which you nod in response, then lay your head back unto his shoulder, trying your very best not to fall asleep before he was finished.

KENMA KOZUME.

u sitting in his lap while he gamed is nothing but routine at this point. he loves when u hold him while he plays so either sitting in his lap OR sitting behind him is a must must must!! he plays any and all type of games as we know but he seems to gravitate towards scary ones sometimes just so youll hold him a little tighter wont admit it tho

currently you sat behind your boyfriend kenma, both legs beside his. you had originally been playing a game of your own until you got bored of it and opted to playing with kenma's hair instead, putting little braids in it, taking them out and repeating. he never once broke distraction from the game but honestly the game he was playing, outlast, was getting a little too gorey even for you. you wrapped your arms around his waist and rested your face atop his shoulder, "ken," you mumbled, a little muffled from your mouth being pressed against his shoulder but you weren't sure he heard you as there was no reply. "hey ken," you said a little louder than the last, "hm?" you heard him repsond. "can you.. uhm play a different game now?" you mumbled shyly. "is this one boring?" he pause the game and turned his head slightly to look at you . "oh no! it's just that... it's a little scary." he looked at you for a second and blinked once before responding, "let me save real quick, yeah?" to which you nodded in response.

"what d'ya want me to play?" he asked looking back at you again, "anything is fine, ken." he nodded at that and opened a different game. "babe, i thought you liked horror games?" kenma questioned. "yeah i do! that one was just a little too much i think." you explained you got a hum in response while he continued the new game.

MATSUKAWA ISSEI.

he and makki, always playing games together. hes not the biggest gamer & rlly only plays mainstream games

currently, issei was in his gaming chair playing the last of us 2 ,whilst you layed in bed and watched. you had watched him play through the first game so of course you wanted to watch this time too! what you werent ready for was the major character death in the beginning of the game!

issei swore he was hearing something your muffled tears odd but he couldn't tell what it was, that was until he paused his game and heard you cried on your shared bed. "baby?" he called out before walking over to you, "are you crying?" "yes," you said softly under the comforter through little hiccups. "oh baby." he said with a slight chuckle, sitting next to you on the edge of the bed, "c'mere." and when you did you were met with strong arms engulfing you in a hug. "i know it's sad but it's only a game, angel." he explains before kissing the crown of your head

HANAMAKI TAKAHIRO.

again he and mattsun play games all the time with eachother! honestly only plays horror games occasionally and their usually only mainstream tbh.

you and your boyfriend makki were sitting on your shared bed, you in between his legs watching him playing little nightmares. to be honest you were trying your best to pay attention but the chase sequences were starting to get to you, especially as the antagonists all piled up to eat his character.

"makki... i don't think i like this game." you admitted shyly. "oh, why?" he asked raising a brow you couldn't even see, "it's pretty popular though.", "yeah but the chase sequences are really scary makki." you whined leaning your head back on his shoulder. "it's almost over, dont worry." he said with a smile while looking down at you and pampering your cheek with a million little kisses to make you feel better.

NISHINOYA YUU.

i swear he stays up so goddamn late playing games with his bestie tanaka it's almost annoying but his hushed giggles when tanaka makes a joke that only the two of you would actually find funny makes it worth it! don't let him near horror games omg.

you have no idea why you let yuu choose a horror game, he was shrieking every 5 minutes even when nothing was happening on the screen. currently, he was playing PT and you sat beside him, laughing at his exaggerated reactions all the while getting scared at the jumpscares just as bad as he was.

"babe i'm not answering that phone, nuh uh,no way" he said pausing the game and looking at you. "yuu the guide says you have to in order to progress!" you giggle at him. "well i guess i'm just not gonna progress!" he exclaims dramatically, tossing the controller somewhere in the room. "besides, i'd rather cuddle with you instead." he grins throwing himself onto you, causing you to fall. "you're such a scaredy-cat." you laugh rolling your eyes, while combing your hands through his spikey hair.

TANAKA RYUNOSUKE.

actually is super passionate abt his horror games 😤 hes a pussy but pushes through every time.

you liked watching your boyfriend ryu play games, but this game just wasn't doing it for you. currently he was playing outlast 2, and the atmosphere was creeping you out so bad you had to look away, not only that but the chase sequences were making you feel anxious.

"holy fuck stop chasing me damnit." ryu mumbled under his breath as the veiled antagonist chased him for what seemed like the 10th time. and honestly you couldn't take it anymore. you snaked your arms around his waist from behind and rested your eyes over his shoulder. "you doing okay?" he asked, a little concerned. "can you take a break from this one ryu?" you mumbled. he thought for a minute before pausing his game and turning to look at you, "is my baby scared?" hey cooed at you, which you nod a yes in response. hugging you real tight he says, "of course we can take a break but only if i get cuddles in return." it was a deal you simply could not refuse.

a/n love horror games so ofc i wanted to write abt it lmfao. i rlly wanna play the new little nightmares game SO BAD ughhh. any who i tried to add some variety in here so pls enjoy lmfao. sorry for any mistakes i def didnt proofread 😩

[meloswifeyyy]

Relationship Alphabet

A - Attitude

Who often has the worst Attitude ?

Well, you obviously. Most of the time because you are hungry or you and Melo just got out of an argument. Melo usually fucks the attitude out of you anywhere, anytime tho.

B - Baby

Who wants Babies the most - first ?

Melo. He often jokes about having kids or when you are having sex he would whisper in your ear  “You trynna have my babies?” or  “You boutta have my babies ” when he nuts in you. He says that he wants 3 or more. You only want 2. You arent rushing into it.

C - Crying 

Who Cries the most in the relationship ?

You. You often cry alone when you miss Melo when he is at away games for so long. Or when your BP triggers, Melo would comfort you. When watching sad movies, or when someone you love dies. Tears of joys appear here and there. Or when you get into arguments and Melo says something wrong or disrespectful out of madness.

D - Dates 

Who has the best Date spots ?

Melo. He would often take you to fancy restaurants in L.A or Miami, or wherever you guys went. Or take you shopping at an expensive place. He would do dates at home like watching movies, have you cook dinner because he cant cook for shit, or he would have a bath waiting on you. 

E - Eat 

Who Eats the most ?   

You. You know damn well you cant survive without food. Its the 2nd best thing that has ever happened to you besides life and Melo. Cant even survive a night. If you would wake up in the middle of the night and get hungry and go to kitchen and try to sneak some food without waking Melo up, he would hear it and go to the kitchen and scare you, picking you up over his shoulder with one arm, and with the other putting the food away carrying you back to the bed because its a little to early in the morning to be eating. 

F - Freak 

Who is the Freakiest ?  

Both of you. You being the only girl that can fuck Melo like you do, and being the only girl Melo is sexually, physically, and mentally attracted to no other girl can do it like you.10/10 in bed. Now Melo on the other hand is a demon in bed. His strokes, hitting your G - Spot constantly with you feeling it in your guts. His 9 inch is almost  always on hard when he is around you. And his tongue is crazy, going in and out and on the pearl AT THE SAME TIME. Crazy right. Spelling his name out on you. He loves when you scratch his back up or give him hickeys everywhere. 10000/10. Makeup sex is the best. 

G - Games 

Who wins the most games ?  

Melo. He would always dare you to a game of Call of Duty or Fortnite to see who would win first. And he would always win. When you would play a game of Uno you would often win and he would be mad the rest of the day due to his competitiveness. But any other game he would win.

H - Happy

Who is the Happiest in the relationship ?  

Both of you. You are always happy when you guys are around each other. Even when you guys just got done arguing you are still happy that he is in your presence. Melo on the other hand is always happy with you around him, he loves to cuddle with you. Its one of his favorite thing to do. He just loves that you are in his presence. You are his other half.

I - Irreplaceable

Who is the most Irreplaceable ?  

You would say Melo but Melo would say you. Melo knows how to deal with you more than anyone else does. He knows all your spots and what you like and dont like. He notices all of your flaws and sees the good and beautiful in them. He knows your body, mind, and soul. No man has a better or brighter or bigger smile than him. He always brightens the mood. You on the other hand are different. A big beautiful smile. You know how to deal with Melo when he is sad, looses a game. You can tell when he is lying or telling the truth just by looking through his eyes. You know how to make him happy. You are the best he has ever had.

J - Jaded 

Who gets the most Jaded after doing something ?

Melo. He usually gets really bored after sitting in the house all day. He really wants to leave the house and do something fun but usually its night time and you would be taking a nap or would be sleep. 

K - Kisses

Who gives the most kisses?

Melo. He is always so clingy and that comes with all the kisses in the world. He kisses you all over your face in your sleep, even when you are sleep he gives you kisses. He loves to kiss all over your body.

L - Love

Who fell in love the fastest?

Melo. He had always had a crush on you and everyone knew you were the one for him. You just didn’t know it until you two started dating. He’s always making sure you are good. He loves your hugs. He was the first one to say “I love you”. He want kids you to have all 10 of his kids.

M - Motivation

Who gives the most motivation?

You. When melo is going to a game and is not having a good feeling about it you motivate him to push through it and win for you. 9/10 he will win or get a lot of points for you.

N - Night Owl

Who is more of a Night Owl?

Both of you. Sometimes when his ADHD is on 10 you guys stay up and listen to music, play games, go on ig live, or just fuck for 7 hours straight. Sometimes you have to tell him to got to sleep or put him to sleep (😏) because he has a game tomorrow and needs all the rest and energy he can get. It also the same for you.

O - Oral Sex

Who gives Oral Sex the most?

Melo. Trust me, you give him head a lot and it’s amazing, 10/10. But melo loves giving you head. He loves to spell his name out on you. Loves to see the faces to make you scream and shout. Loves sharing your cream with you (🥲). He loves to climb under the blanket while you are sleep for some breakfast in bed. Maybe even dinner. His lips make it even better. So glad he don’t got them white genes in his lips (😋😭).

P - Perfect

Whos perfect?

Obviously, no ones perfect but God (🙏🏾). But in your eyes no one else is better for you except melo. You couldnt imagine living life without him. Cant imagine what anyones elses kids would look like with you but. No relationship is perfect. Melo sees you as perfect. Your body. Your style. Your personality. He absolutely loves your touch. He loves touch but for you loving your touch is an understatement. He couldnt imagine his kids with anyone else but you. Cant imagine getting married with anyone else. When you guys get into arguments and sleep in seperate rooms. You barely get sleep because all you can think about is each other. How perfect you guys are for one another.

Q - Q? (Cant find a word, Tell me one and ill edit it.)

R - Relate

What traits do you guys have a like each other?

A lot. Both of your favorite food is Chicken tacos. You both love a good game of Uno. You both love sex. Duhh. Both of you guy’s love language is touch. Love playing fortnite together. Love listening to music and taking drives together. Both love lil uzi (we pretending yall💀). Just in general you guys are very alike.

S - Sex

(No question for this one lol. Y’all already know how we is round hea nahhmeannn😭)

The sex. Omgggg. The first time you and melo had sex was. So amazing. Can’t ever forget that moment. Melo is always so horny. Morning sex is the best. Sometimes a little top at the red light can turn into a few rounds in back of the McDonalds parking lot. Lucky enough all his windows tinted as hell. Or in the Victoria’s Secret fitting rooms. You guys could be listening to Chris Brown and he would really take you down, fuck you back to sleep, switch up the tempo, or make you wet the bed (i’m laughing hard ash). The hickeys. The high sex. Drunk sex (drunnnnkkk in lovvveee). Car sex. Balcony sex. All over the house sex ( i got bars.) Mad sex and Make up sex. I could go on. Sex with me so amazinggggg. (i was listening to this song while writing this one💀😫😫😫)

T - Trips

Who likes taking trips internationally?

Melo. He love to take you and a yearly or even monthly vacay. Just you and him. Turks and Caicos. Bora Bora. Jamaica. Iceland. Japan. Africa. Anywhere where you can get away from the world. The different places. The hotels. Being able to fuck anywhere and everywhere. The pools. The different air. (united states ait is so boring). The new food. The animals. You guys love the new places. He loves to see you happy and with a smile on your face.

U - U (Cant find a word, Tell me one and ill edit it.)

V - V (Cant find a word, Tell me one and ill edit it again.)

W - Right the Wrongs

Who rights their wrongs after an argument?

Usually it would be you first. If you said something that was out of pocket or melo didnt like you woukd quickly apologize. He would forgive you and still cuddle and kiss you and stuff because thats what he does. Tease you. But he would ignore you until he actually forgave you in his head. Melo would apologize and give you some bomb ass d for and apology. Or make that cute face that you can’t resist.

X - (Can’t find a word for X. Give me a suggestion and i will edit it)

Y - Young

Who acts like a Young ass child?

Both of you actually. That’s what makes you love each other the most. The laughs and jokes, the tv shows, everything you could think of. It’s nothing wrong with it at all. Y’all are always gonna bust a joke out at the right time. Maybe sometimes even the wrong time. (damn, double homicide). You guys love laughing with each other.

Z - ZZZ

Who has the worst sleeping habits?

Probably Melo. If you scooted over him even a little bit, he would probably scoot back closer to you or pull you back over to him. And the only con of that is he snores a lot. (Why this nigga snore with his mouth open?🤨💀). Sometimes if he was awake and you werent he would kiss all over you. He loves to lay on your 🍒.

Y’all welcome. I haven’t pose the one of these in a minute. This took me a whole month and a half. I’m tired as hell. 💀

[ac3id]

bully anon 🚶. are u reading my mind? 👁️👄👁️ im literally writing a yandere!bully! bakugo x reader thing where he shares his darling w his crazy classmates 💅 also bakumomo 🤤

bnha: katsuki bakugou x fem!reader x momo yaoyorozu

warnings:  humiliation, degradation, noncon touching, bj. bakugo n momo be meanies :'), fem reader

momo has a kick for seeing u suffer, she just loves when ur eyes get glossy & a  sacred, hopeless expression masks ur face. she gets such a power trip from it that even the slightest bit of guiltiness she feels from bullying u disappears.

but she knows she cant make u cry the way she wants u too. u r not that scared of her. too u, she is just another rich girl picking on u because it boosts their ego. u honestly couldnt care less about those types anymore. so she knows u wont submit to her so easily and thats when she goes to bakugo for help.

the both of them have great respect for eachother, he knows how extraordinary she is and vice versa but when momo asks him, “what do u think of her,” signalling to u, hes a little confused. hes always thought of u as the pathetic type, u did not hold much respect in his heart or mind. hed often forget about ur existence even but one thing he had wouldnt admit, ever was that he also found u hot. very attractive. sometimes, late at night he wud pump his cock to the thought of u. the way u stretched during warm ups, ur beautiful curves. the way ur perfect, little ass bent and jiggled during exercises. he dreamed of going up to u & grabbing a handful. the way ur tits bounced when u ran, everything clouded his mind during late nights when he tried to release pent up stress.

so when momo asked him the question he gave the most honest answer, “just another extra, too me,” momo seemed satisfied w his answer, “so, u dont care about her?” she asks & bakugo agrees. “well she pisses me off.”

the spite momo held in her tone made it hard to believe it was actually her speaking. she asks bakugo for his help. she promises him that he can do whatever he wants with u, whatever. he had said he didnt care about u, it should be easy for him to bully u. he agrees besides, who could say no to momo.

it starts of with usual teasing, hes calling u names, deeming u worthless & laughing when he sees u tear up from his harsh words. he feels amazing, like he is on top of the world. he bullies u pathetically, calling u out on ur insecurities & turning it into a laughing stock for others. while everyone is laughing at ur weak state, fortunately for u someone comes to ur rescue– momo stands up against bakugo acting as she is actually disgusted by his actions, acting as if she wasnt snickering along w the others.

she defends u but what she says just makes u cry even louder. she never outright denies his insults. he calls u a worthless, piece of shit with no real importance to the world. from momo, its never ‘dont listen to him, u are an amazing person y/n!’ but its always ‘bakugo–san, dont pick on others for things they cant change about themselves.” she also thinks u are worthless? guess so? everyone just laughs louder, they know what she is doing & so do u. u know u cant take this anymore, the humiliation brings tears to ur eyes and u can feel the dam break slowly.

u run to the bathroom not sparing a glance behind. u lock urself up in one of the stalls, crying ur pain away. not after long, a loud thud bangs against the door w a crude voice following the tune, “oi, i know ure in there!” bakugo screams, his repeated banging on the door never stopping, “open up!” he continues but u dont listen to him instead putting ur hands over ur ears, trying to block out the sound of his loud cries.

u keep at it for as long as bakugo stands outside the door until u hear an explosion go off & the next thing is he looking down at u ferociously. his glowing, red eyes gleam a powerful hatred making u tremble over the toilet seat. he pulls ur face up by ur hair before slapping u across the face. ur face stings when his hand connect to ur cheek, ur head falling to the opposite direction, ur breath uneven as tears pools down ur eyes.

“oi,” he tugs on ur hair again, ur scalp burning as he tugs on ur weak roots, “u think u can just run away?” u strain ur eyes, trying to look up at him through ur watery vision. “useless bitch,” his stare is intense. his vermilion eyes scan ur tear stained face and he feels himself get excited. the way u are seated would make u face his crotch if it werent for him holding u up by ur hair, “u are pathetic, u know?” he says it like its a question but u very well know hes serious. u only sob harder at his words, fat, salty tears rolling down ur cheeks, u pray to urself that he leaves u alone.

unfortunately for u, the whole scene just excites bakugo even further. he feels his jeans tighten as he starts to imagine u sucking him off. it was just like one of his fantasies only difference; u were here in real flesh & blood withering under him. he drops ur head & u quickly turn ur gaze to the floor, peering down at ur shoes. ur face drops as u hear bakugo unbuckle his belt and pull down the zipper, u keep ur gaze focused to the floor not daring to look up.

what was he going to do? pee on u?

only when he calls out ur name u by mistakenly peep up. the sight u see is scandalous, he pumps his semi-hard cock in his fist slowly as he watches ur every move. ur eyes widen in terror when u hear him talk, “put it in ur mouth, bitch.” his order is absolute yet u dont listen to him. there was no way u were actually going to suck his dick, ur eyes fall back down on the floor as u drop ur head down, “no.” u whisper, ur voice timid. bakugo frowns, what makes u think u have a say in this.

“what do u mean no?” he asks voice on edge, “i-its rape.” ur answer comes out in a weak, broken cry which makes bakugo scoff, “how? im not even touching u.” u try to reason but bakugo is having none of it. growing impatient, he grabs ur head and pushes his cock into ur mouth, completely ignoring ur cries. “bite me and i will blow ur face off” its not an empty threat so u obey. it wasnt like u would be able to win against him anyway.

“suck on it, whore. im litreally asking u to do one single thing but u cant even do that?” bakugo is crude with his words, never missing any opportunity to talk u down. u start sucking on his cock, ur head bobbing & tongue swirling around his tip. he hisses in pleasure, this was so much better than his imagination.

“look at u go, guess the rumours are true afterall.” he laughs. u can feel him coming closer. his cock twitches in ur mouth as he bites his lips roughly, eyes screwed shut in pleasure. his cock hits the back of ur throat before he cums in ir mouth. hot, salty liquid shooting down ur throat making u feel nauseous. “guess sucking dick is the only thing u are good at,” he remarks letting go of ur face. and pulling his pants on. embarrassed, u turn ur face away from him sobbing softly as u wait for him to leave but he never does. instead he watches u cry.

“what are u doing?” another voice breaks in. momo stands outside the bathroom stall knocking on the wooden door. ur head turns to face bakugo in a flash as he goes unlock the door. u grab on his arm, pleading him to not open the door. u didnt want momo to see u in this state. bakugo stares at u before throwing a chasire grin as he opens the door.

more tears fall from ur eyes as u see momo waiting out, concern written all over her face. her fear only increases when she looks over ur broken form. “what happened in here?” she turns to bakugo but recieves no answer, “he raped me!” u scream & momo’s eyes widen. she turns to bakugo, giving him a genuine glare. she approaches u slowly, her hands rest on ur shoulder as she pushes ur face into her boobs while she rubs ur back with soothing circles. “what did he do?” u find it strange how bakugo hadnt left yet, he was technically exposed. what good could it do him? watching the girl whos mouth he just violated get pampered. u tell her about he shoved his dick down ur throat forcefully. u were not sure why she was being all nice to all of a sudden but it was comforting. u keep hugging momo as u cry about bakugo. he just clicks his tongue before getting to leave but momos suggestion holds him back, “why just her mouth?” momo pulls away from ur embrace, her hands now falling behind ur back as she captures ur wrists and bounds the away with ropes she had created. ur wrists adjust uncomfortably behind u. next, her hands reach out between ur legs, forcing them open.

“momo, what are u doing?” the false sense of security is gone as she flips over ur skirt displaying ur light pink panties to bakugo. u squirm around trying to get free of the ropes but its impossible. “didnt i tell u that u can do whatever u want w her?” ur face pales as she starts talking. “shes a virgin, u will have fun. im planning on recording it.” her nimble fingers play with ur clit over the fabric making u wet. “besides, look at her. dont tell me she doesnt want this.” her fingers vanish behind ur panties as she plays with ur holes, ur arousal sticking to her fingers deliciously.

bakugo looks at scene displayed before him and feels himself raging a hard–on again. he takes a good look at ur crying face wrecking u and filling u with his cum till the brim while momo records everything.

[disaster-bay-leaf]

Ok so these were the cutest~ (ㆁωㆁ)

4, 6, 7, 9, 12, 19, 22, 23, 28, 33, 34, 46, 47, 52, 59, 60, 63, 66, 83, 87, 88, 93, 99

I kno I listed like....all of them lmao but feel free to answer whichever you want and ofc you can ask me in return Baybe ( ◜‿◝ )♡

uHUHUHUHU much content for me to answer, im happy bebe 💜💜💜✨

4 - how do you take your coffee/tea?

hm coffee either Very Black No Sugar (for the sleep deprived me) or iced latte three sugars and theres no in between

and as for tea its All Black Teas That Exist, cinnamon-flavoured especially (but basically all teas that come to mind when u think “autumn”), and rooibos!!! okay basically the only oke i dont like is any type of green tea (which is sad because they look cool but my tastebuds said ✨no✨)

6 - do you keep plants?

honestly id l o v e too because i love plants but,,, im kinda horrible at taking care of them though still way better than the majority of my family (research helps) so the only plant i own is kinda a small-palm-tree-looking thing in a bigass glass jar that i saved from my mother’s plant-destructing hands and its mostly doing well (the ends of its leaves are starting to be yellow tho and im worried:((( )

7 - do you name your plants?

yes!!! though the current one was named by my sister and its called “pickett” after fantastic beasts shsjjsj

9 - do you like singing/humming to yourself?

oh god oh dude you have n o idea

i have absolutely n o singing voice but its something i do constantly to give my brain the right amount of stimuli so basically i listen to music 24/7 and hum to myself 99% of that time

12 - whats your favourite planet?

oh i actually didnt think about this for so long but either pluto (hes a planet screw nasa) or saturn (RINGS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!) or venus (girls,,,and libra,,,)

19 - do you keep a journal? what do you write/draw in it?

okay im gonna be completely honest with yall and say that my every single try at keeping a journal failed spectacularly and i lost motivation after like a few months so my only journals rn are my fancy fake-leather-bound calendar to note tests and assessments into, a kinda roughed up notebook that i uses for noting down poems or scribbling or passing notes in class, and a kinda fancy bullet journal notebook that i used as a book of shadows for a while but since my fountain pen died i didnt touch it

22 - are you a morning person?

n o

i am so not a morning person but i wish i could be because honestly dawns are beautiful

but as it is rn im either sleep deprived all the time and loathe every second of being in an awake state or (if i have a few days of schoolbreak) my biological clock moves forward a few hours and i sleep 2am-10am

23 - whats your favourite thing to do on lazy days with zero obligations?

except for the fact that i dont remember the last time it happened, i would probably spend it drawing outside, watching anime with my sister and riding a bike around the forest

28 - sunrise or sunset?

i love sunrises because its so peaceful and everyone is asleep but also i subconsciously immediately correlate them with waiting for a train to take me to school (because thats basically the only time i see them) so its a bittersweet love especially with my fucked up biological clock

but sunsets are really really pretty too and i see them more often so i cant choose

33 - whats your fave pastry?

and isnt that a millior-dollar question dhsjjsjsj

either cinnamon rolls (i absolutely adore them) or that one specific type of cupcake-shaped-thing made out of shortcrust/bread/whatever its called and filled with vanilla pudding

34 - tell us about a stuffed animal you kept as a kid. what is it called? what does it look like? do you still keep it?

awwww this is cute

okay so basically my two favourite stuffed animals (i still have them, they sit in my wardrobe) were two teddy bears (like maybe 20cm high each of them) and one was pure brown and the other was silver-brown and they had stereotypical polish male names “Waldek” (read. Valdek) and Stefan (i think tho im not sure if i remember correctly, my memory is a feeble thing sometimes

46 - tell us the worst pun you can think of

what dog would never bite you? a hot dog *badumtss*

47 - what food do you think should be banned from the universe?

huh a year ago id say pineapple pizza but i guess i dont hate pineapples that much anymore (tho putting them on pizza is still an abomination) but i think that if id ever want to get rid of anything it would be parsley, i hate that freakin herb (does it count as food tho)

52 - what are your favourite memes of the year so far?

the ever given for sure shsjshjsjsjsjjsj

but bullying tramp stamps is gold and pure tumblr energy too

as for fandom memes: im in love with all keeping-up-with-the-todorokis variations and the fact that the entire bsd fandom looked at fukuchi and said “biTCH” and thats one of the only things we’re unanimous about

59 - whats your favourite myth?

i always liked the kora/persephone myth (though demeter is an overbearing parent to the nth power), loki and thor crossdressing at a party to get mjolnir back, atalanta because shes a queen and id politely ask her to kick my ass, and cassandra because she deserved better, and theres a l o t more because alas i was a mythology nerd but this post is long enough for me not to make this section 20 times longer sjjsjsjsjsjks

but there are a lot of slavic myths that are very cool too, though we dont know that much about them as about the greeks for example

60 - do you like poetry? what are some of your faves?

o o o o h yeah i do like poetry because to create such a beautifully sounding thing with only words someone has to be a genius

some of my favs are: some works of nakahara chuuya (thank u bsd for introducing me to this man’s beautiful imagery in his works i swear to god the descriptions do it for me) (also his poem about having hangovers is a mood like i feel you buddy), the raven by ea poe (i know everyone likes it but hOLY DAMN THE INTER/INTRAVERSE RHYMES ARE LIKE,,, BREATHTAKING) (and aso im a slut for gothic horror), and many more but also That One Poem From Welcome To Nightvale about reaching the island in the west,,, only perfect vibes from it

63 - are you fussy about your books and music? do you keep them meticulously organised or kinda leave them be?

okay heres the thing. for anyone else both my playlist library and my bookshelf would be considered pure chaos of a mad man b u t they actually have a highly focused system which means that i sort them based on their vibes, lovability and (in case of books) their age and whether or not theyre a part of a series so i would say my bookshelf is rather organised (when a quarter of it isnt occupying my desk that is) and my music is more organised than not but sometimes it gets out of control and i have to sort it entirely again

66 - what would your ideal flower crown look like?

either entirely constructed of simple white daisies, entirely constructed of only white roses, or something that probably would win a “how many different coloured flowers can one fit in a flower crown” competition

or something purple (maybe not belladonna)

83 - whats some of your favourite album art?

god i dont know if it counts but hozier’s wasteland baby is probably one of my absolute favourites and no one shall beat that

“thrifted youth” (dalynn) and “standard deviation” (danny schmidt) have very aesthetic covers too

also the iconic p!atd too weird to live, too rare to die! album cover,,, its just iconic what can i say

and last but not least matt meason’s pink-and-black album covers (though bank on the funeral is really pretty too but like,,, “who killed matt meason” d o e s it for me and so does the 2017 tribulation single)

87 - what are some movies that you think everyone should watch at least once in their lives?

this is such a hard question because im not a really cinematography-oriented gal but i suppose that (at the risk of not going deep enough into the cinema world):

- the princess bride

- inception

- night at the museum

- SPIRITED AWAY

- forrest gump

- truman show

- E.T. (i cried okay)

- the lord of the rings (because damn me if this isnt one impressive adaptation)

- parasite

and one more personal recommendation: “ready or not” with samara weaving because goddamn i dont usually watch this genre but holy s h i t is it good

93 - whats the hairstyle you wear the most?

honestly just plain hair down (because having curly hair is a menace), split in the middle when i have longer hair and split on one side when its short

also low ponytails or half-up-half-down when im exercising, or double french braids when my hair doesnt cooperate enough to look presentable in any other form

99 - list some songs that resonate with your soul whenever you hear them

this is difficult because my music taste is a goddamn rollercoaster on a good day, but heres some:

- me and the sky from “come from away” musical (this is sort of a test song for my mental stability, if i cry i aint stable)

- dancing after death by matt meason (okay most songs by matt meason except for like,,, hallucinogenics maybe)

- tears and rain by james blunt

- i will follow you into the dark by death cab for cutie

- almost home by mxmtoon

- anything by hozier really but shrike especially

- payphone, the cover by alex g (i cried to this song so many times)

- burning pile by mother mother (can i roast all my problems please)

- long way from home and cleopatra by the lumineers

- autoclave by the mountain goats

oooh that was c o o o o o o o l as fuck thank you sm so much bebe (and sorry for the long post @everyone else)

[hufflautia]

Hope you’ve had a great day today 💛

funnily enough, i literally just stopped crying. today was a bad day, I don't know 

why but my anxiety was just quite bad today and I was panicking before school started. something happened in my first class and I overthink a lot, so my mind was like, “oh my god why did they write your name last, do they hate me, am I boring, am I forgetful, people are always forgetting about me” and “my teacher doesn't like me, why didn't he respond, I'm embarrassed, why did you have to say what you said??” my English teacher does these “mindfulness” moments in which we sit in silence for a minute and reflect on the day, and I literally started crying. after the minute ended, I just stopped bc I didn't feel like crying anymore, and suddenly my brain said, “ur so fake, ur just acting, why did u stop crying all of a sudden, u just want attention u crave attention ur such a faker!!” also I keep thinking about something that happened years ago with my dad, I don't rlly wanna get into it but I think it would be good if I just say it so that its not jammed in my head. basically, I was really young, like in elementary school; my dad asked me if i wanted to sleep in his room with him, and originally, my mom was sleeping with him and i shared a room with my little brother. however, i was like hmm maybe, and then my dad said, haha ill pay u 5 dollars. at the time, i said YAY OK but now i realized that's so fucking creepy, yall know what its insinuating right?? anyways, i said ok, bc it was just a change from the usual sleep schedule and i liked spending time w my dad, so my mom went to my brothers room (it was a king-sized bed so it was ok, it wasn't a small bed that we had to share or anything like that) and i went to my parents room. basically, what happened was that we went to sleep, and in the middle of the night, (the next part makes me feel so uncomfortable and i feel queasy writing it) my dad slapped my butt really really hard to the point where i woke up and i was like ?????? and then he rubbed it softly immediately afterwards. i didnt know what happened, and i told my sister the day after, and she was confused too. recently i was thinking about it and I'm still confused and a lot more uncomfortable with what happened. here is my theory and i was very upset by it bc no one would want to think things like this- maybe my dad likes hurting women during sex and it was a reflex that night, but once he realized it was me, he tried “soothing me” or some shit by rubbing my butt (i literally hate this, i hate the fact that this happened and i don't like typing it out). no one wants to think about their parents sex life so this was just disgusting to think about. also my brother and mom keep arguing and fighting with each other, and I'm sure i have trauma from hearing my parents argue all the time so i rlly don't like it when they fight. my brother has explosive anger and he literally screams at her, which is very disrespectful; however, she screams at him too and sometimes hurts him, which scares me. I'm not worried about my own safety, I just hate violence i hate abuse, that scares me. so much stuff has happened in my life, and it results in a lot of trauma and other stuff that i don't even know about. i just know im really fucked up, im damaged and it just all felt like crashing down on me today- like everything thats happened, i was feeling anxious for no reason, i was thinking about the past, and i started crying again while watching netflix after school, so i just kept crying and i talked to myself out loud about my day and why i was feeling the way i was. that did help to some extent, and after i did that, i stopped crying, and then my brain said “why do you shut off your crying so easily, you seem fake, you seem like you wanna be sad and cry just so that you can see your pretty little tears drip down ur face like an actress, ur so fake ur so fake ur faking it ur not actually sad”, and the hardest part was that i didnt even object to it bc i didnt feel like anything was real, i felt like i didnt know who i was. i was like ok bitch whatever maybe ur right maybe i am faking it. i dont even know how to explain it, but its like being tired of that nagging and negative voice that you just submit to it, and you say ok whatever sure i am faking it, but in truth, the sadness i was feeling was real and genuine. about 10 min ago, i saw that someone tagged me in a fanfic and while i was reading it, i literally started bawling. i guess it was bc i saw in my email inbox that people had sent me asks, and i was happy bc i thought that maybe the person who sent me the fanfic idea responded back with more details. i was anxious about that before, bc i was thinking, oh god what if they just never respond, what if they just dont care about u anymore. when i saw the asks notifications, i felt a lot of relief bc i thought to myself, oh phew ok people still care about u. when i was crying while reading the fanfic, i couldn't stop crying, it felt endless. i couldn't just stop crying like i had before, and it reminded me of the time when my mom was going out to meet someone that she met on a dating app, and it was in the earlier times when she started doing this; she had gotten involved with some terrible men in the past, men who catfished her and were rlly vulgar and gross. im sure this was somewhere in June, when i had just posted chapter 1 of the slytherpuff series bc when i was freaking out about the date, i wrote about it in my journal and i know that it was somewhere in June bc i wrote something like “mom is going out to meet someone and im nervous, please please please i hope shes ok and careful, im really nervous and scared, no one likes my writing, mom is probably in danger, oh god oh gosh”. it was just a whole bunch of negative and anxious thoughts, including how i was feeling about the whole situation with chapter 1, so that's how i know it was somewhere in June. anyways, basically i was really scared for my mom bc shes had a bad history with online men and i was scared that someone was gonna kill her. i read and listen to a lot of murder mysteries, so my mind was going absolutely wild. i remember on that day, i went to take a shower after writing that entry in the journal, bc showering makes me feel better. when i stepped into the shower i started crying bc i was really scared for her and i was hoping she was safe and ok but i was just feeling so scared so i was crying and i couldn't stop crying. that was the scary part because i just kept bawling and i couldn't stop like i usually do; my brain said ok that's enough, you’ve cried enough, but my heart just kept going on and on and my brain said ok ok jessica holy jesus that's enough and eventually i sucked it up and was kinda ok afterwards but still sad and numb. that was similar to what had happened about 20 min ago. also im sure i was also sad today bc yesterday, my mom talked to me about in-person college visits, and her demeanor was very rushed and controlling. she said, “ok jessica we’re gonna do the college visits, we’re gonna drive there, and your dad is gonna come home for that. tell him that you need to do that, ok? tell him we do the college visits together.” i said that colleges are doing virtual tours, and her facial expression was very strained, she was like “DO NOT TELL HIM THAT. dont tell him that, ok?!” and she was pointing her finger at me and everything. she said, “tell him we’re going to do the physical college tours, which colleges do you wanna visit??” and she kept telling me not to tell him about the virtual tours. it reminded me of whenever she told me to say this or that to my dad over the phone, and i was upset, like oh great ok so dad’s coming home and i dont even wanna see him bc i dont like him that much, and now im gonna have to lie bc dad is probably gonna already know about the virtual tours and im gonna have to pretend that none of the colleges are doing virtual tours. in essence, today was a terrible day. while i was crying my eyes out when reading the fanfic, i wanted to tell something, i wanted to reach out to lee and jolie, but my brain said that i would burden them, im always telling them about stuff that happens (concerning my family or other stuff) and its probably getting too much for them.  my brain said that they wont be able to help anyway, im still gonna have to deal with the stuff im dealing with, and no one can help. that's a sad thought, it seems so helpless and sad. sometimes i overthink the smallest things, and when i see a text from lee and jolie that doesnt seem “right”, i think, oh gosh they hate me now, why did i have to say that?? i usually see my therapist every Thursday, aka today, but we didnt meet this time bc her schedule is becoming busy so now we’re gonna do it every other week, so next week i shall see her. perhaps she can help. 

thank you for this ask, it seemed so out of the blue bc no one rlly sends asks like this anymore. while writing this, i literally thought to myself, shes like an angel sent from heaven

[ghost-in-the-hella]

31. “You didn’t think I cared about you, did you?” maybe with Chloe and Rachel if you don't mind

“You didn’t think I cared about you, did you?” The moment the words leave Rachel’s lips, she knows that the argument is over and that she has won. There’s no pleasure in her victory.

She went too far. She can see it in the thin line of Chloe’s lips, the deep hurt shining in her clear blue eyes, the sudden stiffness of her posture. Rachel has said hurtful things to Chloe before, using her words as both armor and weapon the way she always does, but tonight she’s cut too deep. Tonight she struck bone.

“Get out,” Chloe says through gritted teeth, and for once in her life Rachel does as she’s told. She blows Chloe a sarcastic kiss as she climbs out the window and she pretends it doesn’t hurt like hell when Chloe just scowls and turns away.

As a rule, Rachel Amber doesn’t apologize. Staring up at the light in Chloe’s window from the ground below she feels like maybe tonight she should make an exception.

Chloe was supposed to be her ride to the party. Rachel walks to the bus stop down the street from her house. She could call a friend to come pick her up, but she doesn’t really want to. She’s not in the mood for a party anymore, really, but what else is she going to do? Crawl back to Chloe’s room and beg for forgiveness? Say she didn’t really mean it, of course she cares about her, she cares about her so much it scares her sometimes. 

She pulls out her compact to check her makeup. It’s a mess. At some point, she started crying and apparently she hasn’t stopped. She wills herself to knock it off, mopping at her cheeks. She doesn’t have time to stop back at the dorm to get her full makeup kit. On a normal night she could swing back by Chloe’s and fix her makeup there - she’s left a full arsenal on Chloe’s desk - but on a normal night she wouldn’t have cried her makeup off in the first place. 

Dana’s bound to be at the party, and probably Juliet. Between the two of them they should have enough makeup to make Rachel look like she’s never shed a tear in her life. Then she can go find Nathan, and he’ll hook her up with something strong enough to make her forget about being pissed at Chloe altogether. If she takes enough, she can forget everything: forget all the mistakes she’s made, forget all the pressure on her shoulders, forget about being Rachel Amber altogether.

Right about now, that sounds really good.

The argument was stupid, like all of their arguments are. Rachel can’t even remember what specific thing set it off this time. Something about Rachel’s friends being snobs, or about Chloe already being drunk when Rachel got out of class, or maybe it was about Rachel picking up from Frank without Chloe. Maybe it was something about Chloe’s truck, or a borrowed piece of clothing, or a missing accessory. Maybe it was about the fucking weather. It doesn’t really matter what triggered it. They never fight about what they’re actually fighting about, anyway. 

The bus pulls up to the stop and Rachel gets to her feet, delicately wiping away the last traces of smeared makeup. As the doors hiss open and Rachel climbs aboard, she feels a buzz in her pocket. She grabs her phone along with her Blackwell student ID.

Chloe: u didnt mean it rite?

Rachel smiles and shakes her head, rolling her eyes. She must’ve really shook Chloe up if she’s texting already. She’s about to respond when the bus driver clears his throat. “We goin’ or not, kid? We got a schedule here.”

“Oh. Right. Sorry.” Rachel flashes the driver her ID and he nods her aboard, not without an aggrieved sigh. She pockets her phone and finds a place to sit. Rachel leans her head against the window and watches her reflection as Arcadia Bay rolls slowly through her. Her phone buzzes again, but she ignores it. Chloe can stew for a few hours while Rachel gets her party on. They can always make up later. They always do.

[theworldsoul]

Okay so basically... lets talk.

I should've seen this coming. I should've known that after such a long period of happiness, something would give.

I went to pick up my glasses from the dinner table today, because that's where I left them. When I put them on... they wouldnt stay on. I checked and they were missing the two plastic parts that hold the glasses up and still on my nose.

I check the table for them, and I dont find them. Then I ask, like hey, did any of yall touch my glasses? Both the plastic things are missing. My dad IMMEDIATELY assumes that I took them off ON PURPOSE. For some reason. And I tell him no, i didnt touch them, all I remember is picking them up from the table and seeing the plastic bits missing.

Then I spend like an hour telling them no, I didnt break my own glasses, I FOUND them that way. And my dad is like mocking me, going "u always say 'I didnt do it!!!' Like you never do anything huh? I guess you're just perfect." And I'm like... BUT I ACTUALY DIDNT DO IT!!!!???!? and hes like "you never take responsibility for anything, blah blah, you're so fucking stupid, you act like a four year old, stop fucking crying, how dare you ask us if we know what happened, why are you trying to blame us, you obviously did it on purpose and now you're acting all surprised.." and I'm just sitting there. Taking it. Thinking to myself... wow. They automatically assumed the worst in me. And THIS SORT OF THING HAPPENS OFTEN!!! I get blamed for shit I didnt do all the fuckign time.

So I'm just. Crying. Because theres a certain amount of verbal abuse i can take and it's not very much. I'm being interrogated. And its distressing, because I cant PROVE that I didnt do it on.purpose, because i GENUINELY DONT REMEBER WHAT HAPPENED!!! so they just get to assume that i broke my own glasses.

Why would my dad jump to that conclusion so quickly? Simple answer: he literally hates me. He holds back, I know, but hes done this before and he'll do it again, hes shown and said what he REALLY THINKS and he'll say it again and do it again and again and again because his mask is slipping. I dont know what I did to make him hate me but he does. That's just how it is. I can't change that. Man, my parents behave like children.

Anwyays so I'm just very upset, in distress, crying really hard, trying not to say too much so I dont make them angrier but also always telling the truth, which is that I DIDN'T DO IT AND I DONT REMEBER ANYTHING HAPPENEING TO THE GLASSES!!

He asks me, who did it then? I say I dont know but it wasnt me. He said who then, if not you. I said I dont know. He didnt believe me!!!

I hate when I tell the truth and people dont believe it. Like... this is the truth. I have nothing more to offer you. Take what little I give, cos it's my fucking blood.

Anyways in the meantime my mom is checking, looking for the plastic bits. She finds them in my coat pocket.

I am proven innocent. At what cost? Well, now I'm shaking, curled up into a ball, crying, and in actual pain. My brain cant handle so much pain so it transfers it to physical pain. So there I am. A fucking kid. Who's been punished for somehting he didn't do. And theres the proof.

My dad fixed the glasses. Left me there on the couch, still trembling. Gave them to me in a case. Said I gotta be careful. I said thank you. Because, even if I'm upset, I gotta make sure other people dont get upset. He said sorry, but he said it in this huffy way that made it sound reluctant. Then he was like, I said sorry so stop crying.

He wanted a kiss on the cheek and I was gonna give him one because I dont want to seem like a dickhead, he DID apologize... and if you dont accept my dads apologies and move on and pretend that the word "sorry" fixes everything, he gets even more angry and i REALLY dont want to deal with him guilt ripping me over it. So I lean in for a little kiss and... I cant. I cant do it. My face crinkles up all ugly and I start crying hysterically every time I get close. I try a few times but I'm overwhelmed with a feeling of like... oh god. I felt so hurt. Like a scared little rabbit. Oh shit, I was fucking scared. I couldnt do it. It made me feel disgusted.

I said, later I'll do it.

I dont know why he thinks he can hurt me so bad and make me cry, then give some shitty apology and expect me to change my mood entirely and go back to being all happy. That's not how it works. If you hurt someone, they stay hurt. Your shitty little word, "sorry", doesnt make me feel any better and doesnt fix any of the damage.... but I have to pretend like it does because if I dont you get mad, and you say I'm mean for not accepting the apology,,,

Later on, he did come for a kiss again. I was in my room, pretending to be busy so he would ignore me but he didnt. This time, I didnt kiss him but I allowed him to kiss me. I just... I couldnt kiss him. I was holding back tears, and i knew if i tried to kiss him i would start crying all over again and make him upset or angry. So I just sorta... let him kiss me on my forehead. Then I went to the bathroom fast as I could, acting like I had to brush my teeth.

I locked the door, sank to my knees, and cried. Hard.

I just wish that I had a dad who loved me, or who knew how to love me... or who I knew loved me, a dad who knew what he was doing, so I didnt have to debate if he loved me or not in my head.

God. I feel so small. Like I literally feel like a little kid right now. Fucking hell. Looks like tonight I'll be indulging in my delusions, playing pretend.

It's sad that my parents fuck me up, but its sadder that afterwards I dont have anyone to comfort me and help heal me.... only myself and whoever I bring to life in my imagination.

Sometimes when I get overly upset, when I'm pushed to the edge like this, I begin to feel... a lot younger? Like shockingly younger. I'm not even the same dude anymore, I'm a fucking five year old all of a sudden. Which makes the situation even more scary and painful.

Just imagine like, a hurt scared little kid with no one to help him. He's tryna pick himself off the ground and hes telling himself "shhhhh... it'll be okay" that's me. That's literally me and it makes me feel so fucking BAD but its true.

I've been breaking down. Earlier in the day I had trouble on a quiz because I didn't know the definition of a word in a poem and I couldnt answer the question (does character A like character B?) And when I asked they said they couldnt tell me which was bullshit but whatever. Uhm so I got upset. Like, scarily upset. I gave up, wrote that i didnt want to do the question on the paper, guessed at half the answers, crumpled it up and threw it to the ground. Then I just... spaced out for the rest of class because I was STILL upset and fuck them.

At one point I left to go cry in the bathroom, but when i went in there, all the stalls were taken and there was a huge group of guys in there, like maybe ten people in there total, so I ran back out and was like fuck now what. Now I wait. I waited and nobody came out. I double checked and they were sitll there and I ran out again. I dashed to another bathroom down the hall hoping it was empty. I was blasting metal in my ears to try and drown out the FEELINGS, I hate feeling things. Got into a stall, slammed the door, started CRYING, sobbing, talking to myself, all of this with metal music blaring out of my headphones. I composed myself. When I went out of the stall I checked my eyeliner and it was... well, you could TELL I cried. I didnt bother with it tho, i just ran out of there.

Ugh and when I got back I kept doing the stim that usually evolves into literally hitting myself, so that was. Bad. At least this time I refrained from beating the shit outta my own left arm.

God.. I hope everyone who hurts me, everyone who ever fucking hurt me, feels GUILTY as all hell. I hope whatever being made me FEEL all these emotions so hard so strong so fast, ROTS. because nobody deserves to feel so intensely upset that they resort to the worst ways of coping. No one.

I'm just glad I didnt relapse. That's a positive.

[jincherie]

happy zee day! || ‘a yk predicament’

hello everyone it’s currently zee day in AU so !! we’re hoppin on that celebrating shit!!! happy birthday miss zee of @cinnaminsvga !!! i’m sorry your actual fic isn’t up, and that I have yet to complete fox rain 4, but I’m trying!!! I hope this makes up for it a little bit xxxx I love u, and I hope karma lets ur asshole rest this birth year!!! 

pairing | nymph!jk x reader x dragon!yg genre | not applicable. this is a fucking mess NBJHFBJHGB warnings| none! words | 3.6k (oops) sidenote -->  this is a pile of shit but I hope it makes u smile! ily! also i didnt proofread this im so sorry

“Min Yoongi, I swear to god if you don’t stop growling at the poor boy—"

In response to your reprimand, the scaly little bastard turns around and spits and growls at you, apparently even possessing enough balls in this moment to hack up an ember and pelt it your way. You stand in disbelief for a moment, blinking.

The little bastard did not just—

“U-um, p-please! You d-don’t have to—” You turn your gaze in the direction the sudden voice had come from, the speaker freezing and stuttering as soon as your eyes land on him. The nymph blushes instantly, soft emerald-tinged skin tinting pink across his face to the tips of his ears. Still, he attempts to continue where he left off, although his voice quickly loses strength after a few words, “Y-You don’t have to… to fight….”

The nature spirit shifts in his spot where he is still partially angled behind a tree from when your little bastard of a companion tried to bite his hand off, eyes flicking from the forest floor to your face. “I’m… it is my fault… I shouldn’t have revealed myself in the… in the first place. I am sorry, I did not mean to wet him either. Well, I did, but…”

He gulps, risking a glance at your visibly bristling companion, who looks very menacing despite his current tiny stature. At the sight of the glare he is no doubt receiving, the nymph recoils, and your hand begins to reach on instinct to whomp Yoongi a good one on the back of the head. Before you can manage, the nymph speaks despite looking very much like he’d rather be doing anything but.

“I thought… I thought he was a water dragon…”

There is a moment of silence as his words slip softly into the air, and another as they cross the space between you to brush your ears. The second they register, the sudden, powerful urge to guffaw begins to bubble within you, and you’re powerless to stop the loud, ringing laughter from leaving you. Yoongi, however, doesn’t seem to have taken the nymph’s comment in such light spirits.

“RrrrrrRAAAAH! RRRRAH!!! GGRRRRRRHRHHRHRRRRRAH GGRRRAH!!!”

Yoongi attempts to launch at the poor boy, claws out, from his spot on the ground, and despite your tear-inducing laughter you manage to snatch him mid-air with your arms around his middle with nothing short of practiced ease. You don’t need to be fluent in dragon to know that Yoongi just cussed this boy the hell out. Thankfully, it doesn’t seem that the nymph is fluent in dragon either, and he continues unaware of the names he has been called.

“I’m sorry!” He cries, dark chestnut curls flopping across his forehead and flopping over his wide, doe eyes as he shakes his head fervently. “I was—I was just excited! I-I’m the only nature spirit in this forest, around this lake, and when I realised you could have been another water spirit…”

The nymph seems mortified by his series of mistakes, the flowers interwoven and seemingly bonded with his hair wilting slightly as his face reddens further. What. How is that possible? Are they sprouting from his head? You can’t help but reel for a moment as your thoughts take you down a path they probably shouldn’t when you have a spitting ball of scaly anger absolutely frothing at the mouth in your arms.

Thankfully, the slightest wriggle from Yoongi brings your attention right back to the present and you tighten your hold on him, the small dragon yowling pitifully at his foiled attempt to escape. Were you anyone else, you know he wouldn’t hesitate to tear your arms to ribbons in order to escape your grip, but you’ve come to realise in your brief but seemingly endless time together that he would rather do literally anything but hurt you. Why? You’re not sure. You don’t even know why he’s still here with you. The bugger attached himself to you like a parasite ever since you left that witch’s store and you haven’t been able to get rid of him since, let alone get him to part from your side for more than five minutes at a time. You’ve not known true privacy in almost a month.

NOT to seem like you’re complaining, because you aren’t. Your travels had been quite lonely before you had the (mis)fortune of meeting the fun-sized little dragon-spawn—the witch had informed you that he is actually just a baby, by dragon standards, but he’s not an infant per se. Actually, she’d had a bit of a funny look in her eye when she told you that and you’ve still to figure out exactly what it means. You suspect it probably had to do with the fact Yoongi isn’t a baby, but has to be a fucking toddler with the way he carries on sometimes. You never knew dragons were so prissy!

You’d think if a baby wanted cuddles, or affection, they’d ask for it, right? Not this one. The little bastard will sit next to you, not too close but just slightly within reach, and will not say anything for the entire time—and yet, when you don’t immediately know what he wants (cuddles) and when he wants them (right then and right there), he resorts to snapping his jaws around your hand like an untrained pup and glaring at you until you take the hint. Oh, but he won’t beg, or ask for it. Clearly, that’s below him. Yoongi the dragon toddler says ‘fuck y/n lives’, apparently.

You almost don’t even realise you’ve zoned out again until the nymph whimpers, and you realise your grip on the growling, coal-spitting menace has begun to slacken slightly. Sending him a reassuring if somewhat sheepish look, you decide to put an end to the situation at last and hopefully ease the soft-spoken nature spirit a little. You’re still curious about him, after all, and you don’t even know his name. How are you going to find it out if he goes running for the hills in the next few minutes because you happen to have a little goblin in dragon form for your companion?

Without even batting a lash, you free an arm and pull it back closer to your body. Yoongi tenses, as though he’s going to take the opportunity to take flight and launch at the poor boy that had accidentally offended him so, but seems to quickly realise your plan as he whips his head back and hits you with a look of complete and utter betrayal. Too late—he should have thought of the possible consequences when he decided to spit one of his weak ass embers at you. With lightning-fast speed that rivals even his own, your hand shoots forward and secures your well-utilised, trusty grip on the back of his neck. Instantly, as your fingers dig gently into his pressure points between hard scales, he stiffens and then grows completely slack in your hold.

The nymph watches, absolutely in awe, as you hitch the dragon under your arm and rest his weight against your hip. He’s still a baby, so still vulnerable to those same baby reactions—it’s kind of similar to the way a mother cat grabbing her kitten by the scruff of the neck paralyses them momentarily. He’ll be out of the count for a little while now at least. The witch told you about the little hack, saying you probably wouldn’t need it (a bold faced LIE, evidently) and in the whole time you’ve known Yoongi you’ve been able to make very good use of it. He was going to bite you later for it, but you don’t really care. He’s too much of a softie to really hurt you, anyway.

“You’ll have to forgive Yoongi, he’s a bit… sensitive,” you say, offering the boy a smile. He seems to brighten at it, the flowers in his hair lifting a little and his cheeks flushing once more. He shuffles out from behind the tree just a little. “He doesn’t really have the colouring of a fire dragon, and I think he’s a little bit, you know, sore about it.”

You pretend to whisper that last bit, but the disgruntled and somewhat-offended huff from beneath your arm tells you that the dragon heard you loud and clear. Well, serves him right for being an ass.

The nymph giggles at your words, however, and takes another small step out from behind the tree. It is like coercing a small forest animal out from the underbrush, you can’t help but think, and immediately the thought endears you. He’s so cute, with the little flower chain bracelet and the little blooms in his hair—his big doe eyes are probably his most powerful weapon, though, and you sincerely hope he doesn’t know how to use them and you’re not currently being tricked out of your money or belongings or something, You’ve just paralysed your guard dragon, for crying out loud! All you have left is your wits and they’re not the sharpest tool in your shed even on the best of days.

Worrying about such a thing is ridiculous, though, and you know this immediately because despite the fact he’d almost just lost his hand to Yoongi’s frothing maw, the nymph comes closer and coos, brushing his hand tentatively over Yoongi’s snout to caress the myriad of soft blue and dusk-coloured scales there. Yoongi growls and you smack his behind, effectively ceasing the sound.

The forest is still bright and alive around you, vibrating and singing with the birds and the wind, seeming to respond to the nymph’s glee as he admires the small dragon now that the threat around him has been… neutralised, for lack of better word.

“But he is so very pretty,” the nature spirit says, earnestly. You think you catch sight of a blush beneath Yoongi’s scales, and decide to file the observation away to tease him with later, in the event he decides to test you again. The nymph has been speaking fine up until now, when he accidentally meets your eyes and is thrown into another blushing, stuttering fit.  “A-ah, and h-he’s very… very majestic. D-Does he… d-does….ah, nevermind….”

You tilt your head at the shy boy, admiring the way the sun illuminates the silky strands of his hair in a golden halo around his head. You wait until he meets your eyes to talk, offering him another smile. You’d long since introduced yourself when you first spotted him and began trying to coerce him out from behind the tree, but you’ve yet to get him to return the favour.  “What’s your name, oh guardian spirit of this forest and lake?”

The nymph seems to brighten, flowers perking up once more, and he shoots you a large grin that reveals big bunny teeth. You’re about ready to pack him up and take him home, and are simply thankful you’re an evolved being who has the capacity to control such urges.

“I’m J-Jungkook! I-I’m not actually guardian of this forest, or… or the lake. I’m k-kind of… well… To be honest,” he reaches a hand up, ruffling the fluffy curls at the back of his neck. “This forest and th-the lake are under the jurisdiction of the local mountain deity… I’m not needed here. A-Actually, I don’t think I’m really meant to be here…”

A part of you wishes to ask why immediately, but you barely refrain, wishing to allow him to tell you himself. You can tell that even Yoongi is slightly interested now, the mongrel having calmed down in his time spent close to you and now looking up at the nymph as much as he is able with his momentarily crippled mobility.

“I just woke up here a few months ago, without an explanation and without any m-memory of why, or h-how. I c-can’t even… remember anything about before the day I woke up here, besides my name and some other things like that…” There’s a saddened edge to his tone, but he still offers you a smile so sincere it makes his little sprouting flowers glow and preen. “The forest has been kind enough to let me stay here, but I do not want t-to overstay my welcome. I d-don’t belong here, after all. My flowers do not match the ones that sprout from this earth.”

Come to think of it, you hadn’t even noticed that. You direct your gaze around to see if he is right, and when you confirm his words you feel a certain pain of something stab at your chest. Empathy? Sorrow? It’s sad, what he’s telling you. You’re not surprised his story is awakening the maternal instincts inside you that are buried so deep you were convinced your entire life before now that they didn’t exist. Trust the cute, adorable nymph boy your pet dragon almost bit in the forest to bring them out of you.

Well, you’re not one to let anyone be sad for long. You already have one unplanned companion on this trip, why not add another?

“Would you like to come with us, Jungkook?” you ask, deciding not to beat around the bush. “We’re going to the mountain that touches the moon! I need to meet the witch there, I need her help with something. I’m not sure why Yoongi is going, but I’m sure there is a reason. If you want, you can come with us too? There is always room for one more.”

You make sure to send the boy your warmest smile, but still he’s so shocked he almost stumbles back. Of course, it doesn’t help that Yoongi seems to have regained control of his head and attempted to snap his jaws around Jungkook’s poor fingers. “I promise to protect you from my pet dragon.”

You laugh at your own joke, but it’s broken by the cry of pain that jerks from your throat. “HaHAHYOWCH, YOONGI WHAT THE HELL! Don’t make me pinch you again!”

The dragon hatchling, now able to turn his head fully even if he can’t turn the rest of his body, utilises his newly regained range of motion to release your fingers from his mouth and nail you with a heated glare. You know he hates it when you joke about him being your pet (another sore spot you’ve discovered through painful experience), but you couldn’t help yourself when the opportunity was so readily there. You send him a sour look, and he looks away with a huff. If you’re lucky, he might deign to give you the silent treatment later on, and you’ll be treated to an extra few minutes of privacy.

“Anyway,” you clear your throat, smiling at the blushing nymph once more. “What do you say? Would you like to come on an adventure with us? I promise it will be fun!”

You could tell Jungkook had already been very close to saying yes, but when he sees your hand proffered out for him to take, he blushes madly again and it seems to make up his mind. He smiles so big that it overtakes his face and his eyes end up shutting in cute crescents. “Y-yeah! Okay! I’ll come! I don’t really have any b-belongings, I’m ready to go when y-you are!”

You smile at him, absolutely endeared, and grasp his hand in yours to shake. His skin is cool against yours, but incredibly soft and smooth. At your touch his flowers shoot up straight, pollen falling from their centre at the motion, and to your complete and utter surprise two more little flowers sprout, wrestling between his curly strands, and pop to unravel into an immediate bloom. Jungkook looks mortified.

“Sorry,” he whispers, shoulders pinching up slightly as his body curves inwards on itself. “That… that happens when I’m really happy. I don’t know how to stop it.”

You can’t help but laugh softly, reaching up to pinch his cheek with your free hand after releasing his own. “Don’t worry, it’s cute! Please don’t stop it.”

Yoongi lets out a discontented growl, at what you don’t know, and you decide to ignore it in favour of getting on your way once more. You have a lot of ground to cover before you reach the mountain that touches the moon, after all!

It isn’t long into the silent first ten minutes or so of the trip, that you break and decide to probe Jungkook for an answer to something you’ve been wondering. Yoongi is still under your arm, disgruntled as ever. He’s regained access to his front legs but his behind and wings are still temporarily out of commission. Although, he’s been so oddly quiet this whole time that you can’t help but suspect that even if he did regain his butt, legs and wings, the sneaky bastard might not say anything so he gets his daily does of cuddles. You don’t know how such a prickly creature can be so damn needy.

“Jungkook,” you start, waiting until you have his attention before you continue; the nymph had been gazing with fondness over the beauty of the forest as the sun filters down through the foliage, a soft smile on his face. You think his cheeks warm again as he faces you, but you can’t tell. “What was it that you were going to ask before? About Yoongi? Now is the time to ask, while he still can’t use his wings.”

Apparently Jungkook left his fear of the dragon back in the clearing where he’d met you, because he lets out a happy sound and smiles. “I can ask?”

When you nod, he brightens. “He is such a pretty dragon in this form, I was just wondering if he is also this pretty in his human form.”

“He’d like to think so,” you answer in automatic response, before the nymph’s words catch up with you a moment later and you almost trip over the tree root in front of you. Yoongi has stiffened completely under your arm, and if you hadn’t caught yourself from falling you might have hurt the both of you. “Wait—his what?!”

“H-his human form?” Jungkook repeats, somewhat nervous at your reaction. “Dragons have a-ancient, powerful magic. They possess more than-n one f-form. D-did no one?”

“WHAT?” you burst, your brain flatlining for a moment. No way. This little punk is playing a prank on you. Tricking you with his big ol’ eyes and sweet disposition—what a low blow. “H-he’s?? Yoongi has never changed into another form. He’s… just a dragon baby? He’s baby? Dragon baby. Dragon.”

Jungkook seems to swallow some of his nerves, curiosity about the new situation seeming to outweigh them. “Hold on, I’ll show you. When they are young, they can’t change themselves. Their parents usually have to do it for them.”

There’s a moment of stillness as Jungkook takes a step next to you, and then Yoongi lets out a squawk and throws his whole might into trying to suddenly escape your hold. He’s not quick enough, though, and Jungkook manages to grab one of the horns atop his head and hold him still long enough to place his palm against the sky blue scales of his forehead. A growl rips from the dragon, but it’s short-lived and cuts off as the scales beneath Jungkook’s hand begin to glow. You blink—once, twice, and you almost blink a third time but before you can there’s a blinding pink-tinged light that beats you to it. Yoongi’s weight escapes your arms, but you’re too busy covering your eyes to try and stop him.

In the time you have your eyes closed, however short, there is scuffling, rustling of shrubbery and a heavy thump followed by an incriminating groan. Ignoring the slight burn and residual effects from the bright light, you search for the source—and you nearly scream as it comes into sight.

Jungkook is there, standing still and unaffected and cute as ever, grinning brightly at a figure on the ground, a new figure that you have enough sense to know is exactly where your dragon should be. Inky hair, some parts silken and some parts singed, hangs over a tan face, partially covering the soft gold eyes you know belong to the dragon you’ve spent the most recent big chunk of your journey with.  The figure isn’t naked, thankfully, having spawned with a loose pair of inky pants and a similarly styled shirt, but he is barefoot and looking a little affronted at the fact, in between the dazedness. From the grumpy aura, the long horns and big ‘little bastard’ energy emanating from this figure, you know it’s Yoongi for sure before you even have to try and consider it rationally. Conceiving that your magical companion is capable of magically turning into a human form isn’t hard to wrap your head around, and isn’t why you’re standing there absolutely gobsmacked, either.

No, that’s because as far as you knew and had been told, Yoongi was a baby dragon. But the male regaining his senses and apparently the nerve to glare at you from the ground right before you?

He couldn’t have been anything less than a year or so older than you. The baby dragon that you babied and teased and messed around with and teased and cuddled and made fun of, isn’t actually a baby. He’s an adult, and he’s—oh. He’s really glaring at you. A sense of dread makes itself known in your stomach.

“You,” the dragon seethes, steam beginning to dance from the crown of his head. “You’re in trouble.”

Well, that was certainly a promise! You can’t help but gulp—with any luck, you’ll still get to the mountain witch in one piece.

Uh, hopefully. In a last-ditch effort, you attempt a prayer. Noo Karma, don’t do this to me… I’ve been so good lately... you wouldn’t spank me if I was innocent, right?…. Haha... unless...??

Okay, you’re screwed.

[ellinights]

2seung as your parents

2seung is the best parent duo don’t @ me

we all KNOW, seungwoo is the best dad and seungsik is the best mom victon could ever have. and that’s why victon feels like a genuine warm family to me. cries.

okay whOoO

2seung as your parents

the parents with opposite personalities

seungwoo being the loud chaotic parent, seungsik being the calm, reserved parent

somehow they work well together it just works.

seungwoo acts more like a kid than a parent, but seungsik acts more like a grandparent than a parent oof

let’s start seeing how they do during their morning routine of waking up the kids

mornings, would be chaos.

they take turns to wake up the kids and also cook breakfast for them

but 90% of the time seungwoo is waking up the kids and seungsik cooks

oh god the kids eardrums would shatter because of how loud this snoopy father barges into their room with his screechy voice

“KIDS ITS TIME TO WAKE UP WOOHOO”

seungwoo tryna be enthusiast and cheerful while waking the kids up, assuming their days would be much more happier

but tbh the kids feel annoyed with him so their mornings aren’t as happy as seungwoo thought sjjss poor seungdad

seungsik on the other hand, would cook the kids a feast.

i think seungsik is the kind of mom who gives the kids more than they actually need

so yeah the kids would be spoilt because of seungsik

oh, when it’s seungsik’s turn to wake up the kids, he’ll be gentle

slowly shaking them up to stir from their sleep, encouraging them to wake up while caressing their heads

the kids would feel their mornings wouldn’t go so bad because of seungmom

again poor seungdad. he’s been wondering why the mom does things better

seungwoo would cook them rather a simple breakfast, nothing crazy like seungsik

and then when seungsik comes down to see the food he’ll complain saying “WHY DIDNT YOU COOK A BETTER BREAKFAST OUR KIDS NEED ENERGY”

that’ll scare seungwoo off ngl.

multitasking at its finest

one would be helping to wear their shoes and the other helping the kids to wear the jackets.

or maybe one would help dress them up into their clothes and the other would brush their hair

walk the kids to school hand in hand this is such a cute side to see :”)

when they send them off to school, they’ll watch them walk into the school building, seungwoo maybe slipping a tear or two as he watched his kids growing up

“sikkie, our kids are growing up. OUR KIDS ARE NO LONGER BABIES”

you think seungsik would disapprove seungwoo’s behaviour here

bUt heLL nO he is joining the cry party

“i know swoo i know stop making me cry every morning”

when they come back home, they will starts doing chores together.

i see seungwoo and seungsik having a work life so they’ll have to get ready for work too

oh when they pick their kids up from school, it’s during their lunch time

seungwoo, the chaotic one, would scream from a far distance like an idiot

“YOO MY KIDS COME TO DADDO”

oh i forgot to mention, seungwoo makes stupid weird nicknames for himself, like example daddo.

seungsik on the other hand, would run to the kids and hug them the minute he saw his kids, peppering kisses all over to their faces

“my amazing kids did well today in school? yes you guys did!”

seungsik giving words of motivation to his kids every time he sees them out of the school building

sadly the have to drop their kids to a daycare since they still have to go to work.

2seung dreaded this moment they’ll cry once again. JSJSS

this rarely happens i would say but they’ll sometimes bring their children along to their work and ask them to stay there as quiet as possible

sometimes they won’t even focus on their work and focus on the kids instead skjsjs

oKay now after work or during a weekend, when they’re free and no school or work are open

they’ll definitely take the opportunity to be with their kids as much as they can

their favourite activity would be playing tag.

honestly the kids are very gentle when playing in general but seungwoo, being the chaos of the house would encourage them to be more active sjsjs

seungsik don’t mind that either but there’s an extend.

when it gets out of the line, let’s just say seungsik has a hard time stopping them sjsjs he would just give up and sigh sjsjs

sometimes they’ll give the kids their own privacy too because everyone needs it at some point

o h when they’re mad...

seungsik, he’ll be a naggy parent

he’s a bit different from the post i did of seungsik as a father

because he can’t handle seungwoo’s chaos jsjsjs

so he’ll nag towards seungwoo more than the kids but when he do nag on the kids

the kids wouldn’t listen to it at first cause they’re so used to seungsik’s nags, but slowly they will

seungwoo. oh.

when he’s mad, the kids are running to hide under their beds jsjsjs

i see seungwoo as someone who’s very patient. so, he wouldn’t blast off around his kids

but when he does, u h o h

now, at the end of the day. when they’re getting ready for the kids to sleep

would give them a bubble bath uwu cuties

also, would play with the rubber ducks in the bathtub, or have a mini splash fight with them

as usual they would dress them into their pjs, and then, give them a nighttime snack!

movies nights are rare for them but they’ll do it in special occasions

and when it’s their time to tuck the kids to sleep, seungwoo the chaotic parent, wouldn’t be so chaotic anymore lol

okay maybe a little chaotic when he starts storytelling sjjss

would go nuts over the sound effects and intonations sjjss

seungsik, by surprise would join in with seungwoo AHHAHAHHA

but i could see seungsik sing to the kids a lullaby

i mean, who wouldn’t sleep when seungsik is singing cause his voice is soothing and relaxing?

then, once the kids are asleep, they tucked their blankets once more to keep them warm, give them a goodnight kiss and caress their hair :”)

these three are a must for 2seung when they tuck their kids to bed

okay this one really made my heart wrench. 2seung are the softest parents anyone could have. victon is lucky to have them :”)

anyways hope you guys enjoyed it, and i’ll see you in the next one! requests are still open but make sure to check my pinned post before you request. bye peeps

[azrasclaw]

idk if u take concepts but.... what if e is really busy and y/n gets jealous n annoyed cos he isn’t paying attention to her so she goes to G and lies saying e yelled at her for no reason or whatever, so he comforts her and e comes bk and gray starts having a go at him but then they figure out y/n lied and yeah.... punish the shit outa her 🤤😇

i didnt really think about actually writing concepts out as i’m usually really busy but i didnt have uni today and thought i’d just do this real quick. i changed it up a big and turned the smut into angst, sorry about that but i dont usually write smut :( i always start and then stop before finishing.. hope you still like this :) x

’"y/n i dont have time for this right now, i’m heading out for lunch. i’ll see you later,ok?“ e leant forward to press a kiss on you lips as an apology but landed on your cheek when you turned your head in resistance. never one to pick up small cues of yours, he simply threw a jacket on and left the house with a careless "bye”. you were annoyed- no, hurt. in the past two weeks, one hug and the accidental peck on your cheek a second ago were the only scraps of affection ethan had granted you. although the relationship you found yourselves in was lowkey, you had gotten used to getting attention from both boys. if ethan had stopped enjoying the relationship you were in, if he stopped feeling the same, you wanted to know point blank, rather than wait around like a puppy.

“grayson?” you stood leaning on the doorframe. he knew that was your position for serious topics.

“yes?”

“i dont want to be annoying, or needy or anything, but i feel like ethan isnt happy with this arrangement anymore and i think i should stay at my place for a while.”

“what? no! why would you think that, y/n?” he got up from his desk and walked over to you, standing in front of you.

“he’s literally said two sentences to me today and one of them was that he didnt have time for me.” you explained, crossing your arms in order to show your stance.

“baby, he’s just.. distracted these days. about the next video and stuff.”

you shrugged and tried to answer but the lump in your throat prevented you from speaking out. your eyes started burning, you wiped the tip of your nose on your sleeve quickly, trying to keep your composure. you settled for shrugging again.

“y/n, dont cry. please, i hate to see you unhappy.” g pleaded, finally setting his hands on your shoulders.

“i just- dont want you both to feel like this is an obligation or anything.” a sob ripped through your chest, making him pull you into his arms and shush your cries.

you cried a little, then took a nap. you woke up to ethans scent. his big hand was stroking your hair back from your face and when you opened your eyes you could see regretful eyes staring straight at you.

“i’m sorry for neglecting you, y/n. i promise nothing about how i’m feeling has changed. i just get like this sometimes. i get overwhelmed, and stressed, and need space, but i’ll always come back, i swear.”

he sealed his promise with a kiss to your lips, the taste of your salty tears showing him what grayson had already scolded him for, making you question everything and trying to distance yourself, and strengthening his resolution to try to communicate his feelings better.

[its-3am-sadness]

getting lost up in the past— this is what I found

Friday February 1st, 2013:

ugh..im sitting in third hour..i wanna cry, but i cant theres to many people..

can anyone really save me? ..no.. noone ever can.. i just wanna be happy, truely always happy.. )': ughhhhhhhhhhhh! i gotta go..

Monday February 4th, 2013:

holy shit that was a longg weekend.. i almost cut saturday.. i got a new razor & everythingg.. Jake told me to go chuck itt in the snow, soo i did, but then on sunday i went & found itt.. soo i have itt in my ipod case like my other one.

I stayed up till 3 saturday nightt watching 'Enchanted' i love that movie now (: and i sent Jake a 7 and a 9 page text.. he was asleep though..but his best friend is a girl & i have nothing at all against that, i don't have a reason to hate her at all, i havent even met her, but i still am so super jealous.. i hate that they hang out and slepover together and i dont know, i trust him.. but look what happend with the last guy, i trusted him with all my heart, i never thought he would cheat on me and he ended up fucking his ex-girlfriend and lying about it.. im so scared.. i dont wanna be here.. i was thinking saturday & yesterday how i wish i was single just so i don't have to be so paranoid..but i love being around Jake that i wouldnt dream of ending it..

Shawntay said i should tell him about how i feel with him & his besty, but i idont wanna be the dumb bitchy girlfriend who is all 'you cant talk to girls-blahh blahh blahhk' shitt, ya know?? So ima just leave it to myself because i don't care..

im really trying not to cut.. Tabby (my ex's girlfriend) told me that it takes 21 days to break a habbit & we both last cut on the 22nd, soooo we'll see how that goes..

on wednesday it'll be me & jake's 4 months.. & next thursday is valenitines (how ever you spell itt) day and i wanna get him something.. hmm..

my tits now have names.. right one is Adam & the left is Ryder (:

I love him, my baby. <3 soo much.. </3

Wednesday February 6th, 2013:

today is 4 months with my baby!! i love him sooo much. dude. <3 he is so amazingg. i just want to push him in the snow and kiss him and be crazy. i am crazy about him.. like super crazy aboutt him. <3 i dont wantt him to be taken awayyy! ):

Hunter said he was going to ask me out last week on friday on the bus.. god he's a douche.. he broke my heart so many countless times and just left.. and my ex. my good lord, he is such a dick. im sick of them both fucking with my head and heart. ive moved on and it Shawntay's words 'have a new life with a better guy'.. god i love her. i dont know where i would be right now if it werent for her.. <3 i love you shawny'z forever <3

Friday February 8th, 2013:

well..i almost cut last nightt, i didnt but i was aboutt to.. im not taking my meds, im just throwing them in a bag & ima sell them.. they weren't working anyway soo..

Im seriously so sccared that Jake's going to leave me.. even though he says he's not going to an yada yada yada, but still.. im paranoid.. it's just who i am... i love him with all my heart though.. ya know??

im diguesting..im a whore..a damn slut.. in love with a guy who prolly cant stand me.. im fucking pathetic.. why..why..why would, HOW could anyone like me, or put up with me.. i mean, what the hell..im a little ugly bitch. a fat, pathetic, stupid, idiotic, loud, sluty little damn bitch...fuckkkkkkkk.

fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.

fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuckfuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.

fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.

fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.

fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.

fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuckfuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.

fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.

fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.

fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.

fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuckfuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.

fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.

fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.

fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.

fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuckfuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.

fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.

fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck.

Monday February 11th,2013:

well..i hate myself. terribly. fucking. little. cunt. thats what i am. a fucking bitch. a pussy, more like a pair of balls.. pussy's are actually quite strong.. so im a pair of balls. GROSS!.. i like pussy better.. whatever. so anyway.. i hate how much of a bitch i am. im so mean to everyone. im not good enough for shawntay. i dont deserve jake and i feel like i treat both of them like shit.. i dont mean to. they're both my whole world..damn.. i couldnt live with out both of them.. i really couldnt.

Conversation on Saturday Night:

me: how isn't it? if you go then you wont have to worry about me.

Jake: ill worry more

me:no

Jake: yeah i will

Me:no

Jake: why cant i?

me: Because..you just cant. you shouldnt. its not worth it.Never. You should leave before you get hurt.

Jake: this isnt about right now anymore is it?

me: i guess not..

Jake: cause ive told you before im not leaving unless you stop loving me ima be here for you until you dont want me to and ima be with you till you break up with me, i love you and im gonna stay through thick and thin. you wont hurt me. You wont.

Baby i friken love you and i wanna be with you no matter what im yous i dont want anyone else but you and im gonna stay okay?

Me: i hurt everyone. i want to be with you. i am in love with you. but i am so hard and difficult. i push every single person away because i just tear people down. i dont want to do that. You are so amazing and that cant die.

how can i call that mine? that is a way to good for me kindda guy.. ive fallen in love with him. but he is way to good for me.

Tuesday February 12, 2013:

i almost cut last night.. i lost it and i started crying terribly. my mother is such a damn bitch. i cant handle her anymore.. she's having surgary on the 25th of this month.. but shes forcing me to appologise for being 'rude' to my brothers wife.. fuck that.. she told me i didnt appriciate anyone.. you dont tell someone who hates themself, who seriously cant stand to look at herself or hear herself, you DONT TELL THEM THAT THEYRE NOT FUCKING APPRICATIVE! what the hell.. so i have anger issues so i flipped out, not to her, just annonmusly over facebook & shes not even my friend on there so fuck her. seriously. and my mother is sticking up for HER, an not ME. bitch.. i have enough shit i dont need to deal with this, its from over a month ago.. i hate my mother.. she fucking came running downstairs screaming at me for taking something that i really didnt.. i didnt even know what she was talking about.. why... im always to blame. FUCK HER! god... she makes me want to kill myself. she thinks that i look up to her and that she's this perfect little angel and does everything for me.. but all she does is make me feel like shit.. i mean we have our moments that we get along an laugh an are friends. when we're friends we're totally fine, but than she turns in to over protective bitch mode.. i hate itt.. i dont wanna stay after school to get extra help.. and shes fucking making me. i hate it. i hate her. i want to get the fuck away. HELP ME! i need to be saved.

Wednesday February 13th, 2013:

theres not a lot of time to write here today...i only got about 3 minutes.. but damn.. i wanna die.. im not going to stopo myself tonight if i wanna cut. i gotta do it.. its to hard. my parents and my one brother are douches..they fucking dont know when to stop making me feel like shit.. i hate it. goddamn.. i cried so much last night.. i wish i were alone.. it'd be easier not to worry about hurting someone.. i hate myself. im absolutly disguesting. fat, ugly and just so gross.. i hate what ive become.. i cant stop myself. it's who i am now..

my razors fell out of my case this morning, it was scary i thought that someone was going to ask me what they were when i bent to pick them up.. i was so shakey.. i hate myself. ughhh. fuck. i hate everyone, my self the absolute most though.. good bye..

Thursday Febraury 14th, 2013:

well.. i stopped the 21 days last night.. 16.. 2 on my thigh, they're small. and the rest between my two arms. im such a fail..

Jake did the cutest thing ever.. he put a bunch of choclate kisses in my locker & taped it saying 'i <3 u' i keep blushing today.. i just told someone i like they're hat & he said he liked my face, i blush to much, i dont like him even, but it was kindda a compliment, soo.. *sigh* i hope shawntay doesnt get mad at me.. i told her i cut in our notebook, i havent told jake & im nott gunna unless he asks.. i cant tell him.. i HATE THAT THEY CARE!!!!!!!!! ugh... i just hurt eveyrone.. i make everyone want to kill themselves.......... FUCK.

ive been handing outt 'my little pony' valentines today.. only 4 gurls, and like 15 or more guys.. the girls are Shawntay, my friend Kenzie, Tabby & Heather. God.. all of them are so FUCKING gorgeous..ugh.. i seriously wish i could be even half as pretty as them.. Shawntay, everything about her is perfect, i wouldnt change a thing. Perfect long hair, flawless skin, perfect body.. McKenzie, she's in love, happy, so beautiful. Tabby, SO gorgeous, i find her easy to talk to and i think we could be pretty good friends. i love her hair.. i want it terribly. and Heather, her makeup, my lord is it always so damn perfect. no flaws to it, always perfect all the damn day long. She may be a bitch sometimes, but she's also hillarious as fuck. i could see me an her being better friends then we are, but not anything long-best friend. but damn.. i wish i were them..

Friday February 15th, 2013:

last night i broke down terribly and cried for hours.. i could stop. my douche fuck parents.. goddamn.. i wish i could just love them and call it good. but my mom comes down and bitches about facebook.. so now i have to delete it.. god. she controls every damn thing of my life.. she doesnt even know what tumblr is or instagram & she fucking wants me to delete them. HELL TO THE FUCK NO! dumbass. i hate her.. she ruins my life..

Tuesday February 19th, 2013:

okay..well this is reallly really stupid.. but on friday, i realized that with my ex boyfriend, he fucked her while we were together & i had sex with him countless times after.. so now i obviously did something wrong. it showed me how worthless i am & how much i seriously fuck people up..it's all my fault. i loved him wrong. i treated him like shit and look where that's gotten me.. im such a pathetic fucking fail of life. i hate myself.. im used and worthless. im the damn slut of the fucking family for fuck's sake!! my oldest brother just got married & the other just got engaged.. ugh..

ive been starving myself latley too.. it's kinda hard because i love eating, but ive been not eating lunch for about a week & i rarley eat at home soo..