#u know what I’m sick of this shit
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#so I got caught up in the Ikemen game fuck me right#anyway mc in the 2nd princes route is down bad like girl get up u worse than the other one at least the other one the feeling was mutual#this ones mean like who u calling slow? 🤨#we lost her damn like#also there was weird story stuff and I’m like first of all u want me to think this man who has never really looked into the whole romance#thing and finds everyone annoying can do that sort of thing like idk im not buying it#I’m sorry like nothing u say will convince me he can say anything nice like it just#‘with a kind gaze…’ 🤨#what I can’t read the premium route but u can buy the epilogue if there is a god they will strike and kill the creator of the gacha game#I blame fortnight#wait 🫢🤭#u know what nvm 😑#ruined the fucking moment with the span of click#he could’ve just been like I get it now. end sentence end thought nothing else but sadly he must make it known he don’t fuck with this shit#u know what I’m sick of this shit#gotta see to the end but this is the last time I’m doing a recommended route.#freaky ass#like#it’s either something rude or cheesy I cat I can’t anymore I’m going to kill myself#like Jesus#yo why the fuck it go from like we kissing to we doing something dirty I can’t stand it#it can fade to black#idk#like I said freaky ass wtf#ew#u know what picture u hate that one where their at the cemetery#mc looks so silly in the back smiling
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the deweys photos are from this video: https://youtu.be/5xTwJho44ao?si=bPw8MZZ327lCogVZ aren’t they just everything
kissing you and the minnesota wild official media team (with consent) full on the mouth, THANK YOU THIS VIDEO IS EVERYTHING 🥰🥰 i have seen pieces of it before i think (connor petting a shark 🥹) but the entire video start to finish is such a delight, 10/10 would recommend
#i’m so glad i saw this now and not when i was deranged at 2AM last night (i say as if i am not currently deranged)#like i had to physically pause. stop watching the video. to take notes to tell you guys about it i hope you know#holyjost thank u i love u i appreciate u & how u always have the sources 😭#i send out a prayer to the universe (put shit in the tags) & u provide#liv in the replies#holyjost#i love this reaction image btw it is one of my FAVORITES#anyway i was just chilling and then lost it at the ‘brandon just says shit’ part and had to start writing down notes (as follows)#there is SO much. the lore. the fact that brandon lasts two seconds before his shirt comes off everyone else is so bundled#dewey2 immediate “sharks” girl help the two of them on the bean bag together#the boat competition BOLDY’S CONTRACT??? yeah i AM thinking about that in a weird way what kind of contract brandon#also boldy motion sickness girlie he’s so real for that one 😭😭#and brandon talking a big game and then like fuckin. curled into a ball on the beanbag passed out bro i cannot.#LD BONITA? LD BONITA FISH??? So excitedly???? my GOD.#LEAVE THAT POOR FISH ALONE!!!!#oh the shark lore 🥺 dewey baby let me take you to this fantastic thing called an aquarium.#you can pet sharks there!!! i can’t even. i know i’ve seen it and had a breakdown about it before but connor’s hand when he pets the shark#the absolute joy oh my god. connor PLEASE ik u want to touch all the fish… we have sturgeon & sting rays & jellies#brandon praising connor’s attitude 🫡 he is so goal oriented they said the goal is a vibe check and connor studied.#also. save me hot brothers save me#what the fuck is this yeti cup ritual give me a cult au NOW wkdndiwkdi they’re such freaks. i love it. also just drink it bro#VLADDY MENTION THAT’S MY BOY HI BEAUTIFULLLLL#OH THIS WAS THE MIDDSY FIGHT???#awww Freddy (who i never think is a forward??)#connor dewar#brandon duhaime#minnesota wild#for reference!
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Being a hater towards the ed today, shit’s super fucking dumb. What am I planning to achieve with this???? Literally like it doesn’t even go the way your ed-brain wants you to think, like you get to ur ugw and suddenly everyone is jealous & wants to look lik you. Like nah, you’ll just get pity & weird looks from strangers bc everyone can see you’re not doing well and they’ll treat you as if you’re dumber than you are (the infantilization of ed ppl is so real out there (whole another topic but in short: I hate it)), what the actual fuck am I doing this for ?????
#like I already have issues with ’’ppl don’t take me serious bc i’m a woman in stem’’-disease and like pair that up with looking#non-adult?? like that’s fucking not it#and obv my brain doesn't work the way it should when I'm restricting and that's the only thing I need truly#like I used to be smart and able to focus well and all that why tf would I take away the only thing I have going for me#but I also don't want to fucking stop so like goddamnit & fuck I can feel my brain melting a lil bit more each day <3#and I keep thinking like some weeks ago there was a clearly sick/anorexic (skinny like very much so) person out and it wasn't the ''everyon#started to look in envy as they elegantly daintily made their way past'' like it was ppl giving pitiful looks and that fucking sucks but#that's just the reality bc no one ever minds their own business#I remember in my lw (was like bmi 16) my coworkers still kept giving me that same look and the ''r u okay''s like it's not all#fun and games like you'd think it is; good for internet but not sure how it'd work in everyday ''trying to pretend to be a real life#adult who has their shit together''-way; it waters that pretension down quite a bit and I can't afford that; I'm already scrambling#so like could I stop thinking abt going to the seriously underweight bmi; a lil bit is fine bc some ppl just look like that but like ugh#i don't even know what the point is; I'm just mad at myself here like why did I get myself into this like I can't seem to get out#bc I want to but I rly don't;#I want to get worse and that fucks me up like wHY when I know I also don't want to like jesus christ ppl weren't kidding abt it feeling lik#ur brain has two diff sides fighting all the time#i hate this with all my might today yay and ironically enough I'm going to starve abt it <3 logic !!!! we love it !!!!!!!!!#this too should stay as a draft but alas send post
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this song ain’t got no right to be scratchin’ my brain as much as it does
#and i mean that as a compliment#Seven.txt#music stuff#Warren Zeiders#Spotify#gonna start making more use of Tumblr’s features and putting the actual songs i’m obsessed with in the body of posts#instead of just talking abt them in tags. i like music and y’all r gonna Hear about it no matter how bad my taste may be#anyways i’m at an internal war over this song#half of me is like ‘it’s just one of a million Mainstream Country Songs where some white guy sings abt heartbreak. what’s so great abt it?’#but the other half of me is like ‘yeah but. ur weak to that shit. that’s ur kryptonite bitch. it’s in ur blood. we Know this.’#‘also. nice voice + country accent + he’s blaming Himself and not just the girl + 2:40-3:00 makes u go apeshit every time.’#‘Also the cover image is hot as hell and it makes u think of that shot of Boothill standing at that pool table.’#‘oh yeah And the whole damn thing is giving off Seth YuuriVoice vibes. so like. yeah’#and i nod my head in reluctant agreement like yeah ok i guess ur right. damn#anyways if anyone needs me i’ll be in the corner listening to this on loop until i make myself sick of it#hsr boothill#Seth YV#yea fuck it i’ll tag them too why not#if anyone disagrees with me pls keep it to yourself it’s just my opinion pls let me have it in peace
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experiencing any level of joint pain for longer than a day or two has only reinforced my belief that ppl with chronic pain are actually the strongest motherfuckers on the goddamn planet
#marzi speaks#hi. my knees r still kinda fucked up. at some point a few days ago i hyperextended my elbows#so now those have been hurting#my traps r fucked bc i’ve been stressed and those are prone to holding tension in me#my knee pain made me walk wrong for a little bit so now i’m trying to fix that to alleviate the foot and ankle pain#oh yeah. my thumb is still tender for some reason despite the tendonitis having been healed as well#the only part of my body that hasn’t betrayed me as of yet is my spine and pelvis#i am so sick of moving and having it hurt#and like i can go about my day n shit. and have a good time#but it is always there and it is fucking annoyingggg#and ppl with chronic pain just live their whole lives like this.#and they don’t blow up and attack anyone who treats them shitty about it#and i am amazed#bc i talked to my dad abt maybe going to the doctor abt my knees to see what’s going on#bc i don’t remember injuring them at all and i don’t really feel too much improvement on a day to day#and he just gave me a stretch to do about it#now the stretch helps. but my knees still hurt. so like. what do u want from me#if i were to bring it up again he’d probably say it wasn’t a big deal. he’s seen me hobble around the house n how slow i’m moving rn#i normally run around my house. i have been walking at a pace that pisses me off bc i’m impatient#even just having like. worries that are probably exagerrated get dismissed like that has kinda made me wanna kill him a little bit#and this is something that i know is gonna heal and get better#ppl with chronic pain don’t Get That. and they are still dismissed constantly#how do you not like. murder everyone around you. the infinite patience. genuinely the strongest among us#i didn’t mean to complain in these tags as much as i did (my knees r actually doing pretty ok rn and my ankles are getting better)#but i suppose i am bitter
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i feel like i’m wasting my time on schoolwork that i ultimately don’t care about when i could be taking pictures of bugs and drawing yaoi and discussing what kind of lingerie light yagami would like based on his sense of fashion and personality
#like idgaf abt any of this shit rn. i was academia brained for like 16 years give me a fucking break#ik i’m planning to start my masters right after i graduate but honestly i need a break i want to yaoi for some time#unforch that cannot happen bc i am on an invisible timer that says if i don’t speedrun everything in life i will die which i have always#felt since i was young#this could be the result of untreated anxiety tbh but who cares#anyway i went outside to see the fireflies and i was like i’m going to cry i never get to go outside bc i’m busy w school and if i do#go outside to have fun i know i’ll be more stressed bc now i have less time to do school idk man. it’s making me sick i’m so stressed#w school and home and my family and needing to do things and not being built for living under capitalism and shit and it sucks#and i just want to take pictures and talk abt things i like and not have to worry abt shit but life sucks so whatever#i just feel like i’m wasting time doing things i don’t care abt when i could be doing literally anything else#like i already spent so so many fucking years of my life depressed or socially isolated and it fucked me up and is still fucking me up#like i haven’t talked to anyone outside of my immediate family in months and my ocd makes life so hard and my family makes it harder#and i feel like i’m just stuck here and will never be truly happy and that i’ve wasted so much of my life being miserable and that i’m#running out of time and spending it all doing shit i don’t even care about and for what reason#idk. i’m tired so i’m probs not making sense but i’m just. not happy with how my life is and idk if i will be for a long time or if i’ll#ever make it far enough to be happy u know
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so i might have to finally go to my RA abt my roommate and it makes me feel like such a bitch but like. is it really worse than wanting to throw smth at her
like it’s gotten to the point where i have to wear earbuds to bed because she talks so loud. keep in mind this isn’t even who i share am actual room with, and i can hear her. i’m at my breaking point
#alli says shit#it’s like i can’t keep complaining and doing nothing abt it#n i know that’s what an RA is for but it makes me feel. small#like i’ve been trying to be the bigger person this semester and it’s not working#it just makes me even more angry#i might ask my mom what to say bc she was an RA#but damn#it’s fucking wild#it just feels terrible!#if she was a bitch maybe it’d be easier but she’s nice#she just also drives me insane#idk i just need to get it off my chest#i think i’m just worried it’ll also all blow back on me and then she’ll hate ME#even though i’m just like. i wanna sleep. i want to not have to have my earbuds at full blast to get some peace#i want u to clean ur goddamn desk n stop making it everyone else’s problems ants got into ur snacks#it’s just. killing me#like i forgave the roommate who got me sick faster
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I do often Wonder who first figured out things that have become seccond nature to us. Like making tools who figured out obsidian is so sharp who first made fire, who figured out seeds. I have no doubt in my mind that they could and they did. I guess I’m just more curious on the specifics of how they figured it out.
#ryders rambles#like how did they come across this discovery#how did they spread that information who helped them figure it out was it a Group effort solidarity did some kid drop a plum and notice 10#years later there was a tree there#I don’t wanna come off as#oh conspiracy theory aliens or whatever more I’m saying wouldn’t it be so cool to know the exact details of how we first figured out how to#make a knife#like it’s wild man#this shit that’s so seccond nature to us was once new and exciting isn’t that WILD like the wheel was once invented#I don’t think we give early early civilian enough credit man if I looked at a rock my fist through wouldn’t be#what if i sharped that to a point and threw it at things I want to kill it would be OH SICK LOOK AT THAT ROCK#I could fucking never so impressive.#like everything that is familiar to us was once new and I know that’s a simple concept but in action it’s wild to think about#writing system where once new (multiple times tbh denpending on where u are)#cooking meat was once new#I’m jumping around here time wise but I hope u get the picture#art was once fucking new isn’t that insane
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Reading isn’t enough I need to start beating white ppls asses
#they’re literally everywhere and so annoying all the time I’m so sick#and it’s the quiet racism that’s killing me#ignoring dogwhistles pretending u don’t understand things that blk ppl are finding issue with gaslighting gaslighting gaslighting#and I get why ppl turn to the concept of religion and the idea that these people are gonna get what they deserve but what about now#what about the people they’re hurting and indoctrinating now#what about all the white folk who sit back and let it happen and feel comfortable in the fact that at least they’re not saying slurs#and laws keep getting passed that are literally getting us killed and y’all are making up that blk women are mad about kanekalon fuck y’all#And the LEAST you could do is sit and listen and learn but you need to share ur damn opinion on everything u hear and see#even when u know u don’t know shit#and don’t get me started on fandom it’s supposed to be fun here but y’all are so hyper focused on white characters that u genuinely don’t#see ur own racism#and some of you will see posts about it and scroll on and be guilty or think ur excluded#none of u are excluded this about all of u who make one post or reblog a few about fandom racism and go back to taking character traits from#nonwhite characters to make ur white faves look cooler#this is about everyone who thinks they’re some sort of feminist bc they think propping a female character on such a high pedestal nobody can#touch her isn’t falling into racist tropes at all#like sometimes I genuinely hate y’all so much it makes me sick#so tempted to tag every fandom tag I can find here#but y’all will either ignore it or gaslight blk ppl AGAIN like ALWAYS bc that’s what y’all do#dc#dc comics#tim Drake#bc anyone scrolling through this tag needs to see it I promise#Duke Thomas#Cass Caín#bc y’all pretend ur not racist towards her when y’all treat her like a walking dragon lady kys 💀#Damian Wayne#so sorry to Damian stans faced with ppl who can’t read 💔#and thats It.only main nonwhite ppl in batfam.and u still manage to be this racist.except Dick but u only sexualize him Abt it 💀#see how I turned to fandom to cope with the real shit and it still fucking sucks 💀 I hope some of y’all die genuinely
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if u try to answer a rhetorical question on tumblr with a 5 paragraph personal essay that just restates what was Already stated by op and Doesn’t answer the question i am going to kill you
#blurry words#mine#this is mean but i’m so sick and tired of ppl being like#i have an answer to this question!#and then talks for 10 minutes about a personal anecdote#where the answer boils down to#it’s like this bc of the way that it is#like shut uuuuuuuuuuuuuuup if u don’t actually have research skills and know what ur talking about u just end up sounding stupid as shit
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when the very small amount of people in my life who know i’m a lesbian still talk about me dating guys 😃 like
#no cause i’m gonna tell u guys abt this convo i had w my sister the other day#we were talking abt her dating older guys cause she has a type lmao#and i was like what would you do if i was dating someone more than like 4 years older then me#and she was like ‘i would punch him in the face’#dramatic asf#and i was like ummmmm him ? 🧏♀️🧏♀️#and idk maybe she just got confused cause we WERE talking abt older guys but like i mentioned a hypothetical situation where i was dating#someone and she immediately assumes it’s a guy …..#i know it sounds stupid but like i’m out to less than 3 people i know irl and she just blatantly disregards my gayness ???#GODDDDDDD#like i have to talk about men all the time with EVERY SINGLE ONE OF MY FRIENDS AND HER !!!!!#and one of the very few times i talk abt myself and bring up my own dating life ….. and she says hypothetically id be dating a man#it makes me wanna scream just thinking about it again#it immediately ruined my mood#it sucks having no lesbian friends in real life 🤭 like actually devastating sick to my stomach can’t recover type shit#but yk what#one day i’ll make it to one of the like 5 lesbian bars that there are in the US and i’ll meet some friends#ITS GONNA HAPPEN#i’m manifesting it#maybe once i get to college i’ll meet less straight ppl and more LESBIANS#I WANT LESBIANS !!!!#and also i was talking to this other person who’s pan#and they asked me what my sexuality was and i was like im a lesbian#and they go “i like everybody. which unfortunately includes men😪’#bitch …… 😕 you’re kidding me rn#ur joking#pls never say that to me or any lesbian ever#bc i promise u i’ve DREAMT abt the idea of being attracted to men and how much easier that would be#obviously it makes me nauseous thinking abt it but at the same time if i had a CHOICE#since when is there a 30 tag limit i’m trying to rant
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If you really want to beat the game and take down the evil monsters in corporate and government positions, guess what? You gotta participate in the fucking game and that means voting for the people who won’t actively try and kill you or hinder progress or vote for bills in the secrecy of night like the scum of the earth
#you wanna know why republicans keep getting wins? it’s bc the crusty fucks who vote for them… VOTE FOR THEM#the republicans go out and vote bc they at least understand the power their vote holds#like how stupid and defeatist do you have to be to look at your right to vote#and speak out against injustice and all this shit people are creaming their pants about while they blah away on their blogs#and go you know what maybe I’ll just toss this. my voice and my vote. into the trash#and then I’m gonna complain when the person I wanted to win… loses#but I didn’t vote. everyone else should vote tho#bitch you can’t have it both ways you gotta vote or else why are you even here. where is ur conviction#i go and vote so don’t give me fucking shit I’ll beat u with a rolling pin#personal txt#I’m so sick of people bitching about capitalism and politics but then turn around and say voting is pointless#like just lay down and die then jfc get a grip. buck up. strap up for the fucking fight
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love how my mom only does something for me unprompted just bc she wants something
#i knew her asking if i wanted egg noodles at 10pm was weird#and then she literally waited til i got back to my room to TEXTTTTTT me and ask for $40#like yeah i fucking GUES BITCH but if you don’t pay me back im going to scream at you until we both are crying and ur not gonna like it#im tired of her shit dude stop lying about what you need $40 for bc i know it’s not anything you ever say it is miss ma’am#lying ass bitch take my 40 and smoke it up i don’t care anymoreeeeeeeeeee#goddddd i just. am so done with her shit she’s selfish and fucking ridiculous i want to beat her fucking ass lmaooo i’m sick of her shit#tired of ittttt tired of her making my mental health be shit bc she can’t act right. not my fuckin issue anymore bitch do better#anyways i’m going to smoke weed and not be a stupid dumb bitch like my mom hehe#also i am making this post and bc i haven’t sent it to her writhin fucking five minutes she’s already texting me like a fucking freak like#‘are u sending it’ ‘or do u have cash’ ‘where are u sending it’ ‘i can get it off ur card’ BITCH CALM DOWN FUCKING CHEIST I HATE YOUUUUUUU#idk if or what i need to tag this as so if anyone needs me to tag this as anything specific pls let me know
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Yoooo I have covid but I’m pretty sure my boss is gonna make me come to work tomorrow I’m feeling so conflicted
#like I desperately need the job and I’m worried my hours will get cut to nothing or like#I’ll get fired bc honestly I’ve been barely showing up bc I hate it there so much#and like my boss is such a sweetheart fr she just… u knoooo#she’s like a southerner who doesn’t care about politics#like most of the people around here she’s too stressed to care#and while i understand where she’s coming from I think she’s wrong. like. I don’t wanna get people sick#esp when all the regulars are old republicans who I know aren’t vaccinated#if I go I’m def at least wearing a mask but also I’m gonna get so much shit for masking and then what do I say?#that I came to work with Covid?? like an evil person#yeah this sucks#but I just got another job and I wanna quit anyway#BC I haaaaate the bar I hate it#but like also I really need both#ugh what to do
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Wow. Good job, brain: coming up with the absolute extreme worst-case scenario all by yourself. WOW. I didn’t know my friend could start hating me because I wrote them an apology for talking about my life! I didn’t know I could suffocate in this only slightly warm room. Thank you for all that useful information! Sensory overload? You got it covered, brain. Crickets singing too loud, the pillow against my back feels like an oven now. I am tapping on the screen and the sound is echoing in my head! Well done, brain. How very nice you are to me today, fucker
#vent#rambles#brain#anxiety#sensory overload#neurodivergent#fuck u brain u know what#I’m sick of this shit#because logically I understand that exactly none of that is real or valuable to me in any way#but nooooo this fucker has to convince me I’m dying rn#hate it#arggghhhhh#fuck u
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feel so stupidly horribly miserably painfully Bad . Lol
#Perhaps i am a secretly uniquely horrible person ..#Perhaps i will never be fully completely understood by anyone ..#Perhaps i should rot in my hole until i wither away ..#not even my dab pen is saving me . Shit is quite bad!!!!!#Wditing to continue to ramble in tags as i do not want to make another post. Thank u : been crying all fuckin day and spiraling a tiny bit#and it feels extra dumb because i NEED to be doing job apps. and i haven’t don’t any in like a week ?? my dad had a bad health scare and it#just kind of shook me up but also maybe i’m using that as an excuse for why i’ve been lazy. Lol . who knows . just mad and tired of myself#Also have been daydreaming of getting a Tender hug and Kiss on the head and Loving eyes . does anybody know when it all ends#Ok sorry last thing . i got my period a couple days ago and usually i get super depressed right before and then it wanes. However. it is#getting Worse. and that simple fact is making me even more sick n tired. ok goodnight all#Ok editing again to tack on more sorry but i think things will feel a bit better when i go back 2 my apartment. been at home and Lol#was visibly very sad down around my family and they get like. Mad. disdainful. ok sorry!!!!! What!!!!!
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