#unconditional positive regard

[conscious-pisces]

“I feel that there is nothing more truly artistic than to love people.”

—Vincent Van Gogh

[yeommijeong]

i'm highkey obsessed with this thought right now……… we haven't been overanalyzing their little interactions in eps 1-2 (before the worship me convo)!!! there really was Something between them, and that's why the Tension was so Real!!!!!!!! and mijeong, being as insanely observant as she was, picked up on that and that's why she was able to approach him in the first place ㅠㅠ

[gracegrove]

me everytime i get a "just fix my kid" parent.

[compassioneight]

unconditional positive regard

how can we treat people with unconditional positive regard?

-not shaming/making people feel guilty 

-accepting them for who they are, even when they make mistakes

-not judging them for things they can’t control

-not telling them to be a different way

-allowing people to be who they are even when it doesn’t fit our perception of what’s ‘acceptable’

-reminding people of their worth

-build people up not tear them down

[bemorecharlie]

Learning about one's own needs

One of the key things I've learned over the years of managing my mental health is this: What is recommended for most people might not be a good fit for me. I have to listen to myself, my body, my mind, my experiences. It's helpful for me to have someone to express those too. Not because I need their insight, but rather because by voicing things "out loud" I somehow understand them better myself. Thus, for me "unconditional positive regard" in the form of active listening has been the thing which has had the most and best positive impact on my mental health. That level of listening cannot be achieved by anyone who knows me personally, because they get to experience the negative brunt of my short comings… and it's impossible to completely filter one's own feelings out. A professional at least has experience understanding "their own stuff" and has a supervisor to work through things, rather than project onto clients. This last year has been the worst mental health experiences of my life. I finally feel like I'm through the other side, fragile, broken but me again. one of the biggest things I see talked about is how "positive mindset" and changing one's thoughts has on mental well being. This does not work for me at all. It's only been when I've resolved what's happening physiologically in my brain that "managing" thoughts and actions is possible. Again, might work for most people, doesn't work for me. So I'm sharing that if something hasn't worked for you, please keep looking. For me the biggest change happened when I finally got professional support, medication and then large amounts of vitamin D (I thought I'd been taking enough but I wasn't and was deficient). The support of someone caring about my well being, and being able to simply be there FOR ME, without their own "stuff" was massively helpful. I was in a very dark place, caused by many different factors. Not having secure housing being a massive one, relationships ending that had previously been supportive, and physical health deteriorating. I could not get out of the hole on my own. I'm still in the hole, I feel like I'm sitting at the bottom but I'm no longer being buried. I finally have hope that I can get out of the hole. That was only possible once my brain began working properly again.

[eowyn35-blog]

I have to say that on a personal level, I choose to never understand any parent putting a condition on love for their child. Yes, you can make your arguments, and a tiny devil's advocate in me could potentially see where you think you're coming from.

BUT, to me, PERSONALLY, there is no reason to ever deny love to your child (genetic, adopted, found, whatever). I love my own child (God graced with one miracle) regardless of how they may change or evolve over their lifetime. They will always be my offspring and I will always love them. They may DO something I don't like, but I will always love their person, even when I don't agree with their behaviors (behavior includes actions, thoughts, emotions, words). I am here to support my child any way I can so that they can become the person they want (or need) to be. I don't need to live my life through them. I make my own choices along my own path, and my child does the same for them. I do what I can to help them along.

So, I cannot fathom any parent who stops loving their child because of a choice that child makes, perceived big or small, on their way to discovering who they are and/or really want to be. That's the essence of life, evolving & growing into our selves over time. These parents create such irreparable damage when they place conditions on their love. Who the hell are you that your "love" is so important your kid has to EARN it?!

[healthyandbalancedlifestyle]

[connieaaa]

"Unconditional Positive Regard" is 10000x what Christianity was for me. I just have personal boundaries and then I am free to help HOWEVER I want. No rules, no regulations.

I don't have to forgive 7 times, or 70 times, or 490 times. I am free to help on the 730th time because I believe in you, and I am not draining my own personal resources.

[conscious-pisces]

“In marriage there must be complete companionship and concern for each other on the part of both husband and wife, in health and in sickness and at all times, because they entered upon the marriage for this reason as well as to produce offspring. When such caring for one another is perfect, and the married couple provide it for one another, and each strives to outdo the other, then this is marriage as it ought to be and deserving of emulation, since it is a noble union. But when one partner looks to his own interests alone and neglects the other's, or (by Zeus) the other is so minded that he lives in the same house, but keeps his mind on what is outside it, and does not wish to pull together with his partner or to cooperate, then inevitably the union is destroyed, and although they live together their common interests fare badly, and either they finally get divorced from one another or they continue on in an existence that is worse than loneliness.”

—Musonius Rufus

[washed-hand]

The Profound Joys of Being a Pet Owner: A Journey of Love and Companionship

Introduction: The Unconditional Love That Pets Bring

The Bond That Transcends Words: Unleashing the True Power of Pet Companionship

Imagine coming home after a long, tiring day, feeling weary and in need of comfort. As you step through the door, you are greeted by an exuberant furry friend, wagging its tail with uncontainable excitement. In that instant, all your worries and stress seem to melt away, replaced by an overwhelming surge of joy and contentment. This is the transformative power of being a pet owner – an emotional journey filled with love, companionship, and a deep sense of fulfillment.

Embracing Unconditional Love: A Lifelong Commitment

When we bring a pet into our lives, we embark on a profound journey of unconditional love. Whether it's a loyal dog, a purring feline, or any other creature that captures our hearts, pets have an uncanny ability to touch our souls. They offer companionship like no other, showering us with affection, empathy, and unwavering loyalty. Their love is unconditional, unmarred by the complexities of human relationships. In their eyes, we are perfect just the way we are, and they become our confidants, our trusted allies in a world that can sometimes feel daunting.

Healing Hearts and Soothing Souls: The Therapeutic Effects of Pet Ownership

Beyond the surface-level joys, being a pet owner can bring immense emotional healing and well-being. Studies have shown that interacting with pets can reduce stress levels, lower blood pressure, and alleviate feelings of anxiety and loneliness. The simple act of stroking a pet's fur or hearing their gentle purring can evoke a profound sense of calm and tranquility. In moments of sadness or distress, pets can be our emotional anchors, providing solace and comfort without uttering a single word. Their presence alone can remind us of the beauty in simplicity and the importance of being present in the here and now.

Unbreakable Bonds: The Power of Pet Companionship

The bond between a pet and its owner transcends the boundaries of language. It is an unspoken connection that speaks volumes, nurturing a relationship built on trust, loyalty, and unwavering devotion. Pets have an extraordinary ability to understand our emotions, sensing when we're sad, happy, or in need of comfort. They are attuned to our needs, offering unwavering support and a listening ear (or a listening bark or meow) during our darkest hours. Their presence fills our lives with joy, laughter, and an unbreakable bond that makes us feel truly seen and understood.

Embracing the Adventure: Pet Ownership as a Transformative Experience

Being a pet owner is not without its challenges, but the rewards far outweigh any difficulties. It teaches us responsibility, empathy, and selflessness. As we care for our pets' physical and emotional well-being, we learn the importance of nurturing and providing a safe haven for another living being. The shared experiences, the long walks, and the playful moments create memories that will last a lifetime. Through the ups and downs, being a pet owner becomes a transformative experience that enriches our lives and expands our capacity to love.

Conclusion: A Love That Transcends Words

In a world often consumed by the noise and complexities of everyday life, the joy of being a pet owner is a constant reminder of the pure and unconditional love that exists. It's an emotional journey that brings us back to what truly matters – the simple pleasure of companionship, understanding, and being loved for who we are. So, embrace the adventure, open your heart, and experience the profound joys that await you as a pet owner. Your life will forever be transformed by the unwavering love and loyalty of your four-legged companions.

[unofficialchronicle]

Sending Metta:

“Metta” comes to us from an ancient Indian language called Pali, and it translates as lovingkindness, benevolence, active good will. 

Metta is an active form of meditation where instead of focusing on the breath, we focus on sending benevolent thoughts and wishes out into the world, and we imagine that the people—or animals—in our minds are touched by our good will.

Metta meditation was taught by the Buddha 2600 years ago and is still practiced in many traditional Buddhist communities to this day, just as he taught it.

✸

When ready, imagine someone you care about, someone you’re grateful for, and simply wish them well with these words (you can adapt the phrases as you see fit), either spoken out loud or in your mind:

May you be safe

May you be happy

May you be healthy

May your mind be at ease.

Some teachers recommend that you begin with yourself:

May I be safe

May I be happy

May I be healthy

May my mind be at ease.

Take the time to visualize the object of your meditation and feel the outpouring of goodwill. Send Benevolence to folks who support you, who put a smile on your face, who you feel neutral about, who trouble or annoy you, who you do not know, and everyone else. Extend your well-wishes to the world.

✸

Science is confirming what meditators who fold metta into their practice have known for centuries: it increases well-being. From enhanced feelings of empathy to improved relationships to better resilience to helping with PTSD and other trauma-based conditions, regular lovingkindness meditation has been linked to a host of benefits, much like mindfulness and awareness practices. And hey, you may even develop compassion.

[biggest-gaudiest-patronuses]

christ sometimes I just wanna. steal a time machine & go back & sit down next to my 9-year-old self and just like. let them pull out their pokemon card binder & gush about their holographic gyarados or whatever. I'd just smile & ask questions about motherfukcing bulbasaur & tell my kid self that I thought they were a neat person, & someday they'd find other people who thought so too.

like i'm a grown adult who honestly finds most kids stuff boring, but. damn if i could go back & hang out with my baby self & listen to them ramble...just so they knew someone was listening. i would in a heartbeat. thinking about u kid

[thegrievingparent]

A few quotes from “Unconditional Parenting” that I enjoyed.

Overall I enjoyed reading that some things I was already doing AND some things I was doing needed to be changed to fit or align closer to who I want to be as a parent to my children.

[haliun-del-monroe]

I feel like, the more time passes the more im not needing anyone. Major detachment detected.

Of course as a human, entity of social companionship im gonna need something to survive. Something from someone.

There is no unconditional true love, its all mutual gains. Nit to be cold but a dentist wont help you for free haha.

Payment is always done. We don't even need money 🤯