#very emo about this uncle and his baby boy always

[astronocria]

#badbuddyweek day 5: favorite dynamic

you might think one man can’t change the world. but i want you to know that this world can’t change someone like me either.

[ughgoaway]

first anon so I'm a bit nervous 😭, but I've been thinking about this all day

teacher girlie and annie making matty a valentine's day card (or some sort of craft)!! I'm thinking it would be something very cutesy pinterest diy because teacher girlie is a teacher (obviously), and she probably has pinterest boards FULL of cute little holiday crafts she wants to do with the kids!! - 🎸

omg welcome!!! first anon?? please, I am BLESSED! welcome to the chaos that is my blog, I am very happy to have you contributing to it :))))

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now... I'm feeling emo today, and I love a bit of pining SO, I'm thinking pre-dating here. as you said, you're a teacher, so you always do holiday crafts for the kids, and valentines is no different! for today, the kids have a few options, they can make a card, make some paper chain hearts, and they all get a rock that they can make a heart out of their fingerprints on!

(this is the vibe with the rock craft lol)

you have separate Pinterest boards for every holiday, and each one is filled with little activities. (Once you and matty do get together, he does make fun of you slightly for this... but he also has the time of his life when you practice them at home and rope him into it.)

but back to pre-dating time, you are mopey all day. you try to be upbeat for the kids, but it's hard when you're in love with a person who you absolutely can not date, and who has no feelings for you. (or so you think...)

most of the kids are oblivious to your feelings but not Annie, so she ends up dragging you around with her all day and doing the crafts as your co-teacher handles the rest of them. now, she's trying to be thoughtful, which you appreciate endlessly, but it's agony sitting with her all day.

little Annie healy is a carbon copy of her father. the same curly hair, mischievous smile, and cheeky laugh. so instead of distracting you from thinking about matty, it only makes it 100 x worse. especially because she won't stop chattering away about him and telling you about how she's going to give alllll of this to her dad.

you help her with the paper chains first, she folds them up and you glue them together, and she is quite happily nattering away.

"my daddy is going to hang these in the studio i think. he would put them over his bed, but he has too many pictures hanging over it already." she nods assuredly, which only makes you daydream about what mattys bed looks like. (and what he looks like in it)

"oh that's nice! Will your daddy's friends like them too?" it pains you to even talk about Matty today, so you're hoping she'll start talking about the boys and their partners.

"Oh yeah! my auntie charli and uncle George are going to really like them. They're having a posh dinner, not McDonald's or anything!" she then chatters on about the Hann's plans (dropping baby hann of with their mum and going to the cinema) and uncle Ross and his girlfriends valentines day (going to the theatre and then more fancy dinner.)

then, she goes onto matty, "but my daddy doesn't have a girlfriend, so he's not doing anything. but uncle George says he should "get over himself and ask her out" so I think he likes a girllllll" she drops her voice as low as it can go when she imitates George, and giggles when she mentions her dad having a crush.

to say you feel fucking heartbroken is an understatement. she really got your hopes up there by mentioning he was single, only to shoot them back down by saying he has a crush. and you'd swear you could almost see her face if you thought hard enough; young blonde model, 5"10 and 90% legs, wears beautiful clothes and laughs slightly too hard at all of his jokes. and they're both fucking smitten with each other, totally in awe of their collective beauty.

you do the rock craft next, and annie insits that one of the fingerprints is yours, so you do it. but it does feel like a dagger to the chest. Yet, it somehow gets even worse when she demands you sign the card too, "but you helped me miss y/n! you have to put your name too!"

so you scribble down your name with a strained smile and tuck it away in the envelope, trying to not let your soul die in the process.

soon enough, it's pickup time, and annie is the last one. Matty is usually late, but you can't stop thinking of why he's late today. did he ask the girl he likes out? did she say yes? maybe they're planning a date right now. or kissing and being all stupid and happy.

ugh.

but matty rocks up, thankfully alone and with a small gift bag in his hands. probably for his beautiful girlfriend you think briefly, but you manage to plaster on a fake smile and greet him.

"hi matty!" you smile, watching Annie run over and give him a hug.

"oof, hi peanut! you have a good day?" he flicks his eyes up to you and mouths "sorry" he knew he was a few minutes late, but you waved him off and gave him an gentle grin.

"yeah! I made you sooo many things today, daddy. miss y/n helped too!" Annie is scooped up into matty's arms as she chatters away, describing everything she did in detail.

"Right, Munchkin, we've got to go to Uncle Adam's house and get your cousin! his grandma can't look after him anymore, so we're having a sleepover!" Annie squeals quite happily at this information, and you feel like you could too. you highly doubt mattys got a hot date whilst baby sitting two children under 10, so any image of a hot model falling off his arm is wiped from your mind.

"oh here you go by the way y/n, happy valentines" matty says with a smile, handing over the small bag with a nervous grin on his face.

you try to act slightly cooler than you feel when you accept it, and if it was any one else they would see right through you, but matty was so blinded by nerves he didn't notice anything.

"Wow! thank you so much, that's really kind of you. " Your heart is racing in your chest, as is Matty's. if anyone were around you and saw the lovesick look in both your eyes, they would know exactly what you were both thinking. but you were alone, so it stayed unspoken and unnoticed.

matty gives you a shy wave, and walks off with Annie in his arms. leaving you shell-shocked and holding that little bag full of mystery.

[puppycatremus]

agere outfits!

im sure it’s obvious but just in case, the order goes patton, roman, logan, virgil, janus, and remus :3

i’ve never made outfit collage things before, so i hope y’all like these!!! i did my best haha

now for ages and headcanons and such under the cut :3

patton:

age range: he usually reaches like,, tiny baby age. i originally thought he’d be a bit on the older kiddo side cos i thought it’d be cute if he was like “i wanna help take care of the others even if im regressed” but nah his brain is like “you’re an infant now, let others help you whether you like it or not” ksjdjfkf

he’s nonverbal when he regresses, aside from the occasional single word sentence (such as “up!” or yes and no, though he usually nods or shakes his head for that)

it actually took him a while to realize he was an age regressor. he was the last of the group to realize their regression (though everyone else had their suspicions lol)

he doesn’t have a specific caregiver, everyone kinda takes turns caregiving, but baby patton is very (hilariously) attached to remus. his nickname for remus is “mouse” because he can’t really say remus or duke. mouse is just easier (roman is a bit jealous of the affection baby patton has for his brother, but he’ll take that to his grave)

roman:

age range: he goes from roughly 5 to 7, a bit younger if he regresses from stress

he started out being a rather proud regressor, not wanting to accept help from anyone. nowadays he’s the opposite, being extremely needy and clingy lol (no one really minds)

if you think he loves disney when he’s big, hoo boy little him is alllll about it lmao. he’s especially into bluey, watching at least one episode every time he regresses (and usually it’s not just one lmao)

big him isn’t really the biggest fan of remus, but when he regresses it’s a different story. he thinks of remus less as an annoying twin brother and more like a cool uncle that lets you do things your parents wouldn’t let you do. he’s embarrassed by this in a non-regressed state, and it doesn’t help that remus teases him endlessly for it lmao

logan:

age range: similar to roman, roughly 5 to 7, but much younger when stressed. he also has a tendency to age up slightly when others regress in his company. like if he’s seven, but patton goes baby mode, suddenly he’s twelve. not fully out of the headspace, but not as young as he’d prefer

surprisingly, he can be a bit of a brat. i mean this with love lmao. when he’s on the younger side, he has to have everything go his way or else. he also doesn’t handle rejection well. the others learned this very early on, and they each have different ways of dealing with it. but little logan’s smart and caught on to that, so when he needs or wants something, he chooses the big side he goes to carefully. little schemer <3

when he’s on the older side (or really when anyone is younger than him, which happens a lot), he becomes very protective. especially of patton, since he’s baby. he’s surprisingly good at knowing what patton needs, and verbalizes it on his behalf

when he’s feeling sad or stressed, he goes immediately to virgil. and if he can’t go to virgil for whatever reason, he goes to virgil’s room and lays on his bed. or, if he can’t go into virgil’s room, sits outside virgil’s door. virgil is his comfort person <3 or- comfort side. whatever kajdjfkf

virgil:

age range: he’s a teen regressor. like, 14 to 16 ish. he gets even more emo when regressed and no one knows how it’s possible skdjfkfkf

he has a paci he rarely uses, and it took a long time for him to become comfortable using it. he only really uses it when he’s particularly stressed (which, i mean, he’s kinda always stressed lol but the paci is basically for emergencies)

he’s an extremely protective older brother to everyone, and is almost like a caregiver even when regressed. on days where everyone’s regressed (as rare as they are), it’s him against the world lmao though he can enlist help from thomas (or remy if thomas is asleep) (remy only shows up in the mindscape when thomas is asleep)

he doesn’t need a caregiver since he’s always old enough to care for himself, but there are days when he goes to janus. he’s always mortified by it when he ages back up, but when he’s in the throes of teenage angst he needs janus’s support more than anything. he’s just grateful that janus doesn’t really bring it up when he ages up

janus:

age range: usually about 3 or 4, and doesn’t really go outside of that

lil dude loves hissing. but not like mean hissing, just excited hissing. he just goes “ssss!” and everyone knows he’s happy. the hissing is usually accompanied by hand flapping. stimmy lil snake <3

loves giving everyone hugs all the time. he just clings and won’t let go. he’s probably given the most hugs to either patton or roman, the latter of whom is basically always caught off guard by it. patton was caught off guard the first few times but has since adjusted (and happily so)

much like how little patton is very attached to remus, janus is extremely attached to roman. initially, roman wasn’t a fan of this, as he wanted as little to do with janus (both big and little) as possible. but once the two of them managed to bury the hatchet (as in, janus actually apologized), roman didn’t mind as much. it took a bit to become fully comfortable, but now roman is quite fond of little janus (and maybe big janus isn’t so bad <3)

remus:

age range: he could be any age, really. he doesn’t have time to figure out how old he is, he has mischief to get up to. he’s usually pretty capable when regressed, so he’s probably older than most of the others. he doesn’t act like it tho lmao

dude loves aliens. wants to be one. also pirates. his aesthetic can be summarized as alien pirates. or pirate aliens? thats actually why janus has an alien stuffie, it makes him think of remus <3

loves messing with the others when they’re also regressed. says things like “you’re now aware of your own breathing” and no one is a fan <3

definitely the most physically active of the regressors. if he’s not running, he’s jumping. and if he’s not jumping, he’s running kajdkfkfkf bro wears everyone out, even fellow regressed sides. the only one who can calm him down fully is janus, but only when janus isn’t also regressed. if janus is regressed he’s joining in on the chaos

thats the end of the post. i love these guys so much <3

[themetaphorgirl]

Prompt- daob Spence hanging out with Alex and James and the rest of the bau at rossi's place. Maybe they were invites for dinner or something like that?

how did you know that this was actually something that's been sitting in my brain for like two years??

I'm very rusty but this makes me so emo and I love baby Spencer Blake and his eight million aunts and uncles.

also it's interesting to see how many Patron Saint characterizations bled into this. I didn't even notice it until I went back and reread it this morning (I wrote this last night on my phone, mostly at work). also someone please ask me about my theories about Alex's aesthetic pipeline because she's my favorite and I love her.

-------

Spencer wasn’t sure what a Paw Patrol was and this point he didn’t want to ask, but he did know that Henry certainly liked it. The younger boy had been watching episodes on loop since he’d arrived, climbing over the furniture with his various toys and shrieking along with the action on TV. Jack was a little quieter but not by much; he was playing his Nintendo sprawled out on the floor and was clearly losing his game, judging by how often he yelped and scoffed and talked to himself as the handheld console beeped and chirped. 

Spencer curled up small in the corner of the couch with his book balanced on his knees. When they’d first arrived at Grandpa Dave’s house, it had seemed like a good idea to go play with Henry and Jack in the den that had become the default playroom every time the grownups met for dinner. Now it was too chaotic and he couldn’t focus, but the idea of going to James and Alex stressed him out. What if he interrupted them? 

“Hey, boys, who’s hungry?” Uncle Derek said as he stuck his head in the room. 

“Me!” Henry yelled happily, throwing his plastic dog as he vaulted off the coffee table. Derek caught him easily. 

“Uncle Derek, I can’t beat this level,” Jack complained. “Can you beat it for me?”

“I could try, but you’d be better off asking Aunt Penny when she gets here,” Derek said as he draped Henry over his shoulder, making him shriek with laughter. “Come on, kid. Spencer, you hungry?”

Spencer nodded, setting his book down carefully as he followed behind them. Derek patted him lightly on the back as Jack and Henry talked over each other. 

The kitchen in Grandpa Dave’s house was massive and filled with the clatter of attempted cooking and multiple conversations. Dave was busy at the stove and Aunt JJ was setting out plates, and Aunt Emily was attempting to help her as she balanced a glass of wine in one hand. The sliding glass doors were open, late summer heat twining into the air conditioning inside, and he could hear James and Uncle Hotch talking as they worked at the grill. 

“I got the kids!” Derek reported cheerfully. He swung Henry around, making him squeal. “Where should I put them?”

Jack draped himself over the arm of a chair. “Where’s my dad?” he asked. 

“Outside with Uncle James,” JJ said as she shifted Henry from Derek’s hip to hers. “Dinner will be ready in just a second.”

Emily took a sip of her wine as she dropped a fork onto the table. “When’s Garcia getting here?” she asked. 

The doorbell chimed loudly. “That’s her, I’ll get it,” Derek said as he loped away. 

Spencer bit his lip and looked around. Emily smiled at him. “Looking for Mom?” she said. “She’ll be right back, she went outside for a second. Don’t worry.”

Right on cue Alex walked in from the back deck, her long summer dress swishing. “If the two of them will stop bickering over grilling techniques, we can eat,” she said. Spencer sidled up to her and tangled his fingers in her skirt; she immediately drew him closer to her side and bent to kiss the top of his head. “Hi, sweetheart. Having fun?”

He didn’t answer her but he leaned against her, some of the tension fading out of him as she rubbed his back. Things always seemed a little less intense when she was there. 

Dave frowned as he pulled condiments out of the fridge and set them on the counters. “Listen, as long as nothing is well done, I’m good with whatever they’ve grilled,” he said. 

James and Uncle Hotch walked inside from the deck, both of them balancing multiple plates. “That’s something we can agree on at least,” James laughed. 

Hotch set down his plates on the counter. “Barbecue sauces, not so much. Jack, buddy, stop hanging off the chair like that.”

“Hi! I’m here! I hope I haven’t missed anything!” Penelope said as she bustled into the room, Derek right behind her. “Sorry, sorry, rehearsal ran a little late.”

Dave kissed her on the cheek. “What show is it this time?” he asked. 

“Noises Off. I’m having a wonderful time, but gosh, am I going to be bruised,” she said.

“We’ll have to come see it,” Emily said, nearly spilling her wine as she hugged Penelope with one arm. “Family field trip.”

“Is it going to be as long as the musical?” Spencer asked. 

“Hopefully not,” Alex said, barely hiding a smile. 

“It wasn’t that long,” Penelope said. She looked Alex up and down. “Oh my god, Alex, you’re adorable. You look like a preppy mom blogger.”

Alex glanced down self consciously. “Is that a good thing?” she said. 

“Oh, excellent, you look like you’re spending a weekend at your summer home on Nantucket,” Penelope said. “Classy mom vibes. Beautiful.”

James kissed Alex on the cheek as he walked past her. “She’s always a beauty,” he said. 

Henry came running around the corner. “Aunt Penny!” he shrieked. 

“Oh! My godbabies!” Penelope exclaimed. Henry ran to her first, flinging his arms around her neck. “You get bigger every time I see you! Stop! Stay little!”

Henry laughed as she hugged him and smooched him loudly on the cheek. “Aunt Penny, my tooth is loose!” Jack said, leaning around Henry as he vied for her attention. He opened his mouth wide and wiggled the offending tooth with his tongue. “See? See?”

“Oh, I do see, that’s disgusting,” Penelope laughed as she hugged him too. 

“That’s his second tooth this week, he’s going to put the tooth fairy in bankruptcy at this rate,” Hotch said dryly. 

Penelope smiled at Spencer. “Hi, sweetie,” she said. “Would you like a hug too?”

He nodded, slipping away from Alex, and Penelope hugged him tight. “Oh, you’re so precious. Are you getting taller? You seem taller.”

“I don’t think so,” Spencer said. He wrinkled his nose. “Yesterday one of the parents at therapy group asked me when I was turning nine. I had to explain that I’m already nine.”

Alex laughed. “You’ll catch up, I’m sure of it,” she said, smoothing his hair. 

“Yeah, keep eating your vegetables and you’ll be as tall and strong as me,” Derek said, playfully flexing. 

Spencer rolled his eyes. “Height is mostly determined by genetics, Uncle Derek,” he said. “Eating vegetables wouldn’t cause that much growth. Minimal at best.”

“My mom always said I would have been taller if I’d just eaten vegetables,” JJ said. 

“Adults just say stuff like that so children eat vegetables,” Spencer said. He looked up at James. “Right, Dad?”

“Yeah, he’s right,” James said, beaming down at him. 

“Ha! I knew it!” Jack said, grinning cheekily at his dad. 

Hotch raised an eyebrow. “You’re still eating your vegetables,” he said. “They’re still good for you even if it doesn’t make you taller. Right?”

“Oh, yeah, right,” James said. He pointed a scolding finger playfully at Jack. “Listen to your father, young man.”

“All right, all right, all right, stop squabbling and let’s eat,” Dave said as he set down the last plate of food on the table. “Everybody sit, before it gets cold.”

Spencer hung back as everyone starting taking their seats, but James took him by the hand, walked him up to the table, and guided him to a chair next to Alex. “What do you want to drink, kiddo?” James asked as he sat down at his other side. “Water or something else?”

Spencer shifted around to sit cross legged. “Something else,” he said. 

“Lemonade or sweet tea?”

“Lemonade,” he said, and James picked up the pitcher and poured it into his glass. 

Dinners at Grandpa Dave’s house were always chaotic as everyone carried on multiple conversations and passed around food. It made him feel better to sit between James and Alex. He knew his parents would take care of him, they would make sure he got enough to eat and they would understand if everything started to feel like too much. 

Although they weren’t his parents. He had to keep reminding himself of that. But he almost didn’t mind when he forgot. 

His plate ended up overly full, but with just enough space to keep his food from touching. He listened to the grownups talk as he ate, sometimes chiming in. They never minded when he joined in their conversations. 

Most of his dinner was delicious, but somehow a pile of grilled mushrooms had ended up in his plate. Spencer poked at it with his fork. He hated mushrooms, they were slick and spongy and left a weird taste in the back of his mouth. But he couldn’t just not eat them, he might make someone upset. He stabbed one with his fork and gritted his teeth. 

Alex touched his back lightly. “You don’t have to eat those if you don’t want to,” she whispered. He bit his lip. “Do you want to eat it? No one will be upset if you don’t.” He paused, then shook his head. 

Alex caught James’s eye and nodded towards Spencer’s plate. Without dating a word he scooped the offending mushrooms away. “Are you still hungry, Spencer?” he asked as he spooned the mushrooms onto his own plate. “You can have more if you want. Or you can have more later if you’re not hungry now.”

Spencer took a deep breath. Sometimes he had to remind himself that he was going to be able to eat again, that things weren’t how they used to be and he wouldn’t have to go hungry anymore. His therapist talked about it a lot, and so did James and Alex. But it was easier to talk about it than actually remember. 

“I think I’m a little bit hungry,” he says in a small voice. 

James smiled at him and scooped out a little more grilled corn and roasted potatoes for him. Spencer relaxed. 

By the time dinner had wound down he was comfortably full and a little sleepy. “Who wants dessert?” Dave asked. 

“Oh, I couldn’t eat anything else if you paid me,” Penelope sighed. 

“I don’t know, I think there’s pie. I would live off dessert if I could,,” JJ said. “I’m going to put a movie on for Henry. Jack, Spence, do you want to come?”

Jack immediately slid down from his chair, a half eaten hot dog still in his hand. “Yeah!” he said. 

“Finish that first and then you can go play,” Hotch said, half laughing. 

Spencer climbed down. He didn’t really want to go, he sort of wanted to just stay with his parents, but if the other boys were leaving he was probably expected to go too. Alex squeezed his arm lightly as he walked away. 

He went back to his corner of the couch and his book, and Aunt JJ set up a Disney movie for them. Towards the end of the movie Aunt Emily checked on them and brought them brownies and apple pie and vanilla ice cream, and kept them company for a while before switching to another and going back to the grownups. 

Spencer was barely interested in the first movie and even less in the second, and he’d long since finished the books he’d brought with him. Jack was still playing his Switch, much more subdued than earlier, and Henry had fallen asleep on the floor with a toy in one hand and a brownie in the other. 

He bit down on the pad of his thumb. Lately he’d been trying even harder to break his thumbsucking habit, but it was tempting, especially when he could feel exhaustion creeping into him. The novelty of going to Grandpa Dave’s had worn off, and he wanted his normal bedtime routine and to sleep in his own bed. He felt like he was wound too tight, tense enough to give himself a headache. 

Before he could talk himself out it of he slid down from the couch and slipped out of the room. The kitchen was empty, but the sliding glass doors to the backyard were open. It was dark outside, but the lawn was lit with string lights and he could hear the adults talking. 

The grownups were sitting outside on a scattered collection of deck chairs and loungers; most of them were sipping drinks and Grandpa Dave had lit one of his cigars. Spencer crept closer, his bare toes curling at the feel of damp fresh cut grass under him. 

His parents were sitting together, Alex with a glass of wine in her hand and James leaning back with his arm around her shoulders. Spencer paused. The grownups were deep in conversation and he didn’t want to interrupt. He inched closer, hoping they would notice him.

“No, I remember reading about that,” Alex was saying, but as she talked she opened her arm to him and he crawled into her lap. “There was a journal published six months ago, I think?” Spencer leaned his head against her shoulder as she cuddled him close. “It brought up some good points about the legitimacy of the previous research.”

He exhaled slowly. Already he felt better, the pressure in his head beginning to lift. Alex patted his hip absently with her free hand as she talked, and James shifted his legs over his lap to make him more comfortable. 

The adults’ conversation began to blur in his ears as he snuggled closer to Alex and twined his fingers in the shoulder strap of her dress. He could feel the steady thump of her heartbeat and the softness of her dress, and she smelled like her violet and vanilla perfume and the strawberry scent of her half drunk glass of moscato. He nuzzled his cheek against her shoulder and she kissed the top of his head. 

He didn’t remember falling asleep, but the next thing he knew he was being carried, but not by Alex. He whined through his teeth. “It’s okay, baby, go back to sleep,” James said softly. “It’s okay. Daddy’s got you.”

He blinked sleepily as James lifted him into the car and buckled him in, but he must’ve fallen asleep again, because the next time he opened his eyes he was in his own room. The nightlight was switched on, casting soft gentle shadows on the wall, and Alex was changing him out of his shorts and his tee shirt.

He scrunched up his face. “‘m home?” he mumbled. 

“Yes, my darling, we’re home,” Alex said. “Time for bed.”

He was too sleepy to try to sit up and get his pajamas on himself, so he didn’t fight as Alex dressed him and got him settled against the pillows. “Mama?” he said. 

Alex smiled as she tucked him in. “What dearest?”

He rubbed his eyes. “Love you.”

Alex kissed his cheek, then his forehead. “I love you too,” she said. “Get some sleep. You’re home and you’re safe.”

She sat down on the edge of his bed, and it didn’t take him very long to fall back asleep as Alex stroked his hair away from his face.

[cleoselene]

I’m reading that old reddit thread about people regretting being parents and it is a DOOZY

I will say that on the flip side of these horror stories, I had an abortion and it was a very simple and easy outpatient procedure (this was pre-pill abortion, I had the vaccu-suck or whatever you call it lmao) and the worst it got was the next day felt like I was having a crummy period.  Otherwise it was fine.  Easy as far as medical procedures go.  They had a tv in the corner showing Jerry Springer.  I never had a single moment of doubt or regret.  That was 25 years ago this year, damn.  I love my niece and nephews, I love my roommate’s kid, too, but damn I am so not up to being responsible for the existence of a whole person.  Existence is a lot to put on someone who literally does not ask for it!

I made a post to this effect on facebook and my pregnant cousin took it personally.  She caused all kinds of drama.  I was like, bitch, why do you assume everything is about you?  To be perfectly honest I wasn’t even aware she was pregnant because I never look at her facebook since unfollowing it a few years ago when she started posting MLM bulslhit so I legit honestly was NOT talking about her.  And like, my friend @brittanysteakknight just had a baby and she didn’t take my post personally because she gets me.  Also, Brittany’s baby is hella cute like he came out perfect?  He doesn’t have that freaky ass baby look and like, my cousin’s baby looks like Dwight Eisenhower, like most white babies lmao.  idk if it’s even a boy or a girl she and i unfriended each other and i was like, good bitch.  she was annoying since birth, that one.  Annoying, spoiled little shit of a child, and an adult who shills MLMs when she’s already rich (like wow it’s bad enough when broke people are doing it out of desperation, why the fuck is your retired stockbroker’s wife ass doing this?), and apparently thinks everything I post is about her when literally none of it is.  Like, absolutely no thoughts of Karissa went into my head when I made any of the posts she claims were me sub-facebook posting her. I was literally talking about myself when I said that no child asks to be born.  I was being emo and dramatically posting lmao.  It happens I’m allowed to be emo.  

Also she got mad when I said parents are crazy to raise kids in Ron Desantis’ Florida if they have the means to move elsewhere and she got REAL butthurt about that.  But like, again, WAS NOT TALKING ABOUT HER, but was referring more to how my roommate homeschools his kid because he has the ability to, while like my own nephews don’t have that option because their mom works and my brother is fucking useless.  It’s a privilege to have the means to homeschool or move out of the state.  And she felt called out by me bringing this out I guess because she thinks everything is about her and maybe she has some residual guilt because guess what; she and her multimillionaire husband absolute have the means to either move or homeschool and they do neither.  so like, if she feels guilty about that, it’s not my problem, and also, stop thinking the world revolves around you!  literally this has always been her problem since she was a bratty little kid.  I remember her vividly at my cousin’s funeral loudly making grossed out noises when my uncle killed his dead son’s forehead.  Yeah.  She was a rotten kid and she’s a rotten adult.  Being rich also apparently doesn’t make you happy because she is mad insecure for someone who claims I’m jealous of her life (lol -- this accusation was PUZZLING.  she is both married and has three children, there is nothing about her life that appeals to me.  Not for all the money in the WORLD)

anyway lol all of this to say that abortion has a very low regret rate.  but the suicide rate for women who give children up for adoption is pretty significant.  abortion is usually described as satisfying health care that provides relief.  and like, I think it should happen in only really important cases, like when a woman is pregnant and she doesn’t want a kid

[lady--dis-dain]

I love how people’s explanation for liking Zuko is usually “the bad boy aesthetic” but if you think about it the real bad boy is Aang

- got imprisoned and trialed for murder

- solved a 100 year feud between two clans by lying, wasn’t even sorry about it

- scammed the crap out of a random town in the fire nation

- nearly destroyed the entire city of Omashu while illegally using the mail system as a slide

- destroyed someone’s merchandise multiple times

- actually ran away from home, Zuko’s pathetic excuse of an emo boy just got banished

- stole farmlands to build a zoo in broad daylight

- lied to an all knowing spirit and IT WORKED

- entered ba sing se illegally (he didn’t have a passport)

- lifted the robe of the Earthking’s advisor without permission to find a bite mark

- FUCKING BROKE INTO THE EARTHKING’S PALACE IN BROAD DAYLIGHT BY FIGHTING LITERALLY ALL THE GUARDS

- was an undocumented citizen of the fire nation the whole time they were undecover

- broke through the fire nation’s blockade twice, once completely by himself when he was wounded

- cheated in an earthbending tournament to defeat the champion and win money (and a fancy belt)

- illegally entered a fire nation school, uncovered certain things about the fire nation that way, got into a fight, had to have a parent/teacher meeting, organised a secret dance party, got discovered and fled with the help of his fellow students, and at the end earthbent in front of them nearly blowing his cover

- DESTROYED AN ENTIRE FIRE NATION FACTORY IN ONE NIGHT WITH KATARA’S HELP ALONE

I could probably think of other things but my point is Zuko is pathetic and weak and stupid and only Aang has the true bad boy aesthetic you’re welcome

(idontactuallythinkzukoispatheticandweakhesanamazingcharacterandilovehimbutmypointstillstands)

[captainlevisteacup]

All Characters, the Nicknames MC has For Them, and the Events That Follow: A Wholly Unnecessary Thread

Warnings: None, unless you count demon boys being butthurt about being called out

Enjoy my stupidity!

Lucifer👿🖤🥀☕🍷

Luci

Pridey Pants

Gordon Ramsey of Life

Mom

Loosen-up Luci

Jesus's emo brother

*cough* Daddy *cough*

The results of these nicknames....they were not pretty. MC calls him Luci? He doesn't LOVE it. Does that small scary smile that MC knows (or should know) not to push.

Pridey pants...ohhh boy. MC says it at dinner....is absolutely terrified when he doesnt do anything. After dinner, follows MC into the hallway to dole out *ahem* punishment

Beel is the only one to understand the Gordon Ramsey one. Starts booming laughter

Mom. Oho. This is the second worst. Happened when MC asked Luci to pass them a steak knife. Ended up with the knife being thrown into the table, inches from MC's hand.

Ah. The worst one. Jesus's emo brother. He doesnt even know where to begin. The brothers AND Diavolo have to SPRINT away to keep from cackling like crazed lunatics. Simeon is the only one who openly laughs. Kitchen duty for 2 months. Absolutely worth it. Would do it again without hesitation.

Mammon💛💵💰💳

Mammory Gland

Finding Nemo Seagull (Mine! Mine!)

Crow

Tan Elsa

Greedo

General Greedous

"Ehhhhh? What's a mammary gland?"

*muffled Satan laughter*

Mc has to explain the crow one, because apparently it isnt common knowledge that crows love shiny things?

Tan Elsa. Levi was crying when this one slipped out of MC's mouth. All Mammon could do was be offended. After much, MUCH coaxing, reluctantly agreed to dance to "Let it Go" in a dress.

Levi💜🐍🎮🕹

Has a thing for degradation, so you can really only insult him with anime stuff

Levi Heichou (if you get this, we can be friends)

Leviathan the lonely

Snake man

Mermaid Boy

Snekky snek

Levia-hand

He could ignore all of them.....except for

LEVIA-HAND

I mean come on!

"MC did you really have to go there? That was really-"

"Below the belt?"

"UGH MCCCCC"

*distant suggestive Asmo noises*

Satan💚💢📚

Angry bean

Grumpy kitty

Nerd

Angry librarian

Blond, angsty James Charles

Fashion disaster

There isn't a single one of these that DOESNT make Satan want to break something.

Who is James Charles? Fashion disaster?! "I happen to dress very nicely, thank you very much"

"How am I a librarian? I just read, it's very different, honestly MC"

Refuses to even acknowledge "grumpy kitty"

Asmodeus😘💋❤💅

Asmo-dick-us

Ass-mo

Momo

Polly Pocket

The kinky one

*jokingly* slutttttt

He, surprisingly, doesn't mind any of them. He thinks it's really cute that MC has nicknames for him. He always encourages you to call him them more often, and even makes a bunch of them for MC. His favorite one is Momo, because:

"Its just so cuuuuuuute!"

Beel🥺🍔💪🏻

Sexy Vacuum man

The last Weasley

Snack Buddy

Hungry Bean

Un-beel-eavable

These all make the boy SO HAPPY

MC cares enough to make nicknames for him?

*happy Beel noises*

Wait. MC thinks he's sexy?😳

What's a Weasley?

He has a snack buddy?☺☺☺

Belphie🙁💭💤🛏

Sloth man

Sleepyhead

That bastard with a choking kink

Killer grip

The emo twin

Black Sheep

"I woke up like this" master

He wants to be mad. He really does. But there's a problem: he can't argue with ANY of them. Kinda makes him smile just a LITTLE

Is glad MC has forgiven him enough to actually JOKE about the choking incident.

Spends a lot of time trying to get someone to explain what "emo" means. Levi knows what it means, and refuses to tell him because he thinks its funnily accurate

Dia👑💮🔥

Double D Dia

Big Tiddy Divvy

King of the Boobs

Díablo

Milk man

Firehead

The rich, gay uncle

There isnt a single minute he doesn't find these hysterical. He thinks it's a charming human world custom, to give someone a nickname. He also thinks it shows how comfortable with him MC is.

His favorite is easily DD Dia. Mc noticed his body? *smirk* interesting

Why are so many of them boob related? MC does realize he is a male, right?

The rich, gay uncle. Diavolo has no words. Absolutely shook.

Lucifer overheard some of these...was appalled MC was harassing the PRINCE with their ridiculous nicknames.

He was about to go off on a terrified MC, when Diavolo stepped in laughing and told Lucifer....

"Calm down, Mom."

Mc nearly choked on their own suppressed laughter

Barbatos had to quickly usher them away so MC could openly laugh and therefore breathe

Barbatos 🧐👀🐀🕓

Barbie

Simply one hell of a butler

Sebas-chan

Time warp man

Chuck E Cheese

The cake maker

Understands every single reference, is actually surprisingly cool with it, as long as MC doesn't embarrass him with it.

Diavolo catches wind of what MC is calling Barbaties, eventually starts adopting the nicknames

The only one Barbatos doesn't like is "Chuck E Cheese", because he hates rats so so much. How dare they compare him to one of those disgusting creatures?

Simeon🌙🤍🌹🌈

Boomer

Dad joke central

Beautiful man

Sinful shoulders

Angel Dad

Sin-ammon Roll

Simeon can't decide between being flattered or appalled. He's not THAT old. Nor is he a father! Well, maybe more of a father figure in regards to Luke, but still! He doesn't tell THAT many dad jokes.. right?

Blushes intensely at Beautiful man and Sinammon roll. Wonders if MC really means that or is just teasing him.

Eventually he makes the stupid decision to ask Asmo....wrong move. Asmo ends up laying out all of Simeon's desires towards MC, the week following he can't even look MC in the face. MC has no clue what happened and starts to think it was their fault.

They confront Simeon about it after a while, and Simeon full on breaks and confesses to MC

Asmo takes full credit for this happening

Solomon😑🖤💫🧙🏻‍♂️

Shady Lady

The sus one

Kinky dude

Draco malfoy

Doesn't mind MC having insulting nicknames for him....he has them too. Starts swapping them with MC to see who can make the other laugh harder.

Sometimes, the brothers will sit in and listen while they exchange them, and they'll keep score and vote on who wins

Eventually, Diavolo and Simeon get involved

Barbatos caters these events

Luke😇👶🏼🌸🧁

Baby angel

Son

Woof

Puppy

Little doggo

The poor boy has no idea which one he hates more. Gets so flustered whenever MC calls him one of these that his whole face turns red

Simeon tells him its adorable every time without fail

This makes Luke even worse. All MC has to do is call Luke one of the names and its fair game for Luke hunting

The only one he actually...kind of...likes is Son. He likes the idea of MC as a parent figure.

Which leads him to realize: what if MC and Simeon got together! Then MC WOULD be his parent

Gets Solomon and Barbatos to help bring MC and Simeon together

They end up bombarding the two with an obnoxious Valentine's day-esque cake

Did it work?

[i-need-entertainment]

Haikyuu Boys and the moment they thought their child came from satan

Characters: Akaashi, Washio, Konoha, Kita, Suna, Ushijima, Yahaba, Iwaizumi, Futakuchi, Daishou, Numai and Iizuna

Warnings: Children, children can be cruel- please proceed with caution, the guys being called not-nice-things cause kids are (albeit cute) incarnates of satan. I say this with love, and yes I have trauma, mentions of injuries, nerf guns and shooting someone with them, pushing someone down the stairs

Akaashi Keiji:

When your son was first born, he was very much a parents-only child. He didn’t like to be held by strangers, which were anyone not his parents.

But there was one exception to that rule, and that was Bokuto.

Which was good because even as an adult I don’t think Bokuto could handle being rejected by little Akaashi.

As he got older, he slowly warmed up to more people, but he was still very shy everywhere not home.

Bokuto had been visiting for the weekend, wanting to come see his friend and his family!

Bokuto had left that morning, and your son was still not happy. He really wasn’t a difficult kid, but this weekend had been a long and active one, so he was very tired.

And seeing as he was indeed Akaashi’s son, he was also very blunt.

“Come on buddy, let’s go take a nap. I know you’re tired.” Akaashi tried to coax his son to come with him, eye brows furrowing when his son shook his head and refused.

“Why not?” his son pouted as he looked up to his father.

“Cause I want uncle bokuto…” Akaashi frowned as he kneeled in front of his son, “I know, but he’ll be back to visit soon.”

His son shook his head, “No, I want him now, I want him to tuck me in.” One of Akaashi’s eyebrows rose, his head tilting to the side abit, “Why Uncle Bokuto? Why not daddy?”

His son sighed, “Because I don’t like you, I like Uncle Bokuto.” Before he trudged off towards his room, dragging his blue blanket behind him, leaving Akaashi speechless and betrayed.

You wasted no time in assuring Akaashi that ‘he didn’t mean it!’ and that ‘he probably won’t even remember it when he wakes up’. But that didn’t do much to sooth the seething pain of your first born betraying you✌😔

Washio Tatsuki:

Washio was outside with the kids, watching over them while they played.

You were inside, talking on the phone with your mom and sipping a cup of tea/coffee.

You were flipping through a magazine, laughing at a memory your mom had brought up, when the front door burst open.

Turning around, the smile on your face dropped when you saw Washio holding your youngest (3 yr old son), who was balling his eyes out.

Apologizing to your mom you stood up from the couch, immediately walking over to them.

“What happened?? Did he get hurt?” Washio sighed as he gently handed him off to you, running a hand through his hair as he shook his head.

“I don’t know, he won’t tell me. All I know is he’s scared, but he won’t tell me what scared him.”

You frowned as you held your little boy, cradling his head against your chest as you slowly rocked back and forth, whispering words of comfort into his ear and kissing the crown of his head.

Eventually, he stopped crying, he was still a bit sniffly and had a few hiccups, but he had settled down quite a bit.

You sat down on the couch with him on your lap, Washio standing after he had brought the twins in as well.

“Wanna tell me what scared you baby?”

Your little boy looked at you, slate gray eyes shimmering with tears as he wiped his cheek before turning to look up at your husband.

He pointed a little finger, “Daddy, daddy’s scary.” He then proceeded to dive back into you, head snuggling into your neck.

You quickly looked up to see your husband's eyes widen as his jaw dropped, looking down to your son in complete and utter disbelief.

It broke your heart the way he clung to you that night, head buried in your chest as he quietly asked if he was a good father, conclusion: kids can be cruel…

Please don’t hate me, i guarantee this hurt me more than it hurt you

Konoha Akinori:

You had brought out old videos from Konoha and yours high school years, wanting to show them to your kids since they were curious. And you and Konoha had wanted to trip down memory lane anyway.

You had chosen a game of Fukurodani vs Nekoma, since those were always good ones.

Your kids were more than entertained to watch it, since dad had long hair?!?!?

They also liked seeing some familiar faces, like Komi and Saru and others obviously.

But one of your children found a specific moment a little...too funny.

It had been a rough match, and a close one as Konoha had remembered it. Akaashi had been subbed out after a ball caught his nail, Washio had very minorly twisted his ankle, and Bokuto had already gone through 2 emo modes, the 3rd not far away.

Konoha had been getting over a cold, he was no longer sick but he wasn’t at 100% yet, so he wasn’t completely in it.

Not to mention he had to make up for the absence of both Akaashi AND Washio.

It was half way through the second set, he was in the back and Yamamoto was up to spike, only Konoha wasn’t expecting Yamamoto not to hit and instead for Kuroo to come up from the back, meaning the ball his Konoha right in the face, knocking him down on his butt.

You all kinda laughed at that part, I mean, who wouldn’t? (don’t lie-)

But what you didn’t expect was a full on demonic cackle coming from your 3 year old who was sat in between you and your husband.

It wasn’t a chuckle, or even a laugh, IT DIDN’T EVEN SOUND LIKE YOUR 3 YEAR OLD!!

It was...unsettling, and when she bounced back not 2 minutes later, you snuck a glance over to your husband, who was slowly scooting away.

Kita Shinsuke:

Kita came in from the fields, closing the door and slipping off his shoes, stretching his hands above his head as he groaned.

He smiled when he heard little foot steps echoing through out the hallway, watching as his little girl ran towards him and into his arms.

He smiled wider when you walked out of the nursery, little baby in your arms as you came up to him and gave him a kiss.

Time skip to dinner that night, all 4 of you are sat at the dinner table.

Kita is sat at his usual spot on the end, you sitting to his right as his daughter sat to his left, you feeding the baby.

He put down his fork to rub his neck, fingers trying to work out the knots that had formed over the past few days.

“You know, granny and I are going to get massages this weekend, why don’t you join us? Gin said he’d be willing to watch the kids.” Kita smiled towards you as he nodded.

“That’d probably be a good idea, thanks honey”

You nodded as you continued to feed your youngest, sending silly faces and smiling at her little giggles.

Kita was about to continue eating when his oldest daughter asked him a question.

“Hey daddy? Why do you need a mass-age.” He chuckled at the way his daughter said massage, going back to eating.

“I’m goin’ cause my neck is sore sweetheart, it’s just from work, nothin’ to worry bout.”

Your daughter nodded, returning her attention to her plate as well.

“So, basically, daddy’s just really, really old.”

You turned away so your husband wouldn’t see your smile, and it worked until you snorted and started laughing.

His small glare towards you only making you laugh harder.

“It’s not bad daddy, you’re just really old, but s’okay, I still love you.”

He shook his head, eating the rest of his dinner with a pout as your daughter carried on like nothing happened and you explained why she shouldn’t say those things.

Suna Rintaro:

Suna was sat on the couch with his oldest son and daughter, watching a movie.

Obviously it wasn’t scary or inappropriate for children, I mean, it was a kids movie. But he had to admit, this one was cutting it a little close.

He would have turned it off but...it really wasn’t that bad and the kids were sitting quietly and watching it, so he figured it’d be okay.

His kids weren’t exactly squeamish, and they didn’t scare easy, but they were also only 8 and 6, so he wasn’t going to risk it.

He also didn’t want to risk it with you, he had a comfy bed and he’d prefer to continue to sleep in it😊

Sometime after the half way point of the movie, a scene came up that was questionably violent for a kids movie. There wasn’t any gore or anything, but it wasn’t a clean death either.

He reached for the remote to change it when his kids started giggling.

Not like uncomfortable awkward chuckles, I mean real and sincere laughter...AND SOME DUDE HAD JUST DIED?!?!?!

Suna texted you with a ‘please help, our children are demons’ as he tried to return his focus to the movie and not his snickering children.

Ushijima Wakatoshi:

Ushijima had just picked 3 of his kids up from school, and was taking them home.

His 2 oldests were talking to each other about school while his youngest (of the 3, not in all), just sat quietly and listened to the radio.

His oldest had asked about his day, and Ushijima told him all about his practice and the practice games they played.

The 2 oldests were entranced, and loved hearing about the sport, his middlest however did not.

It’s not like he hated the sport, but it wasn’t really for him. He much preferred martial arts to volleyball, which was fine with Ushijima, at least his son was happy!

Anyway, Ushijima and his 2 oldests started to talk all about volleyball, the middlest looking confused.

“Wait, why is it like that?” Ushijima peaked in the rearview mirror, “It’s the rules, like how there are rules in Jujitsu.”

Your middlest turned towards the window, “Yeah, but Jujitsu is cool, volleyball sucks.”

Ushijima almost crashed, and it wasn’t long before he got home, pulled into the drive way, parked, and turned to face his middlest with a face that said ‘where did I go wrong…?’

His son just turned to face him, “What?” Ushijima shook his head, turned off the car and headed inside.

When he got inside and walked past you, all you heard was him muttering ‘no child of mine will say that about…’ as he headed straight for the bedroom to lie down.

Yahaba Shigeru:

Yahaba was walking around the living room, sorting through the mail as he separated bills and important things from junk mail.

He had been working in his office all day, doing paper work and what not, and right now he had his ear buds in since he was technically in a work meeting. (muted with the camera off cause how else do you do things virtual?)

So he was completely unsuspecting of his two sons as they snuck up behind him, both holding nerf guns in their hands as they crept closer and closer.

Yahaba had paused, slipping his phone out of his pocket as he started to talk to his coworkers about something when all of a sudden the unmistakable whirring of the automatic nerf gun started.

Before he could even turn around his sons had open fired right on their dad, Yahaba yelping as he started to run, grabbing a pillow from the couch as he fumbled with his phone, desperately trying to mute himself between being pelted with nerf bullets.

“ACK- hEy! You two! Quit it!-” He had made himself a shield out of the couch cushions, finally getting his phone and apologizing to his giggling coworkers, he wasn’t in trouble obviously, the distraction and entertainment was a gift to them all.

The meeting then finally ended, and Yahaba turned to find his sons searching for bullets, him shaking his head as he walked towards them.

“Nice try boys, but I collected the bullets as you shot me, so there’ll be no more of that.” His youngest shrugged as he then decided to instead throw the toy at Yahaba, his oldest then hitting him with it as he shrieked and made his way to the master bedroom.

Iwaizumi Hajime:

You and Iwaizumi had 3 boys.

3 boys who were close in age and high in energy, never a great combo when they’re stuck indoors because of the rain.

You had been taking a nap due to a weather-related head ache, while Iwaizumi did some work from home.

He had heard some questionable sounds coming from the basement, but he didn’t pay them any mind, figuring they were just being kids.

That is until he heard a distinct ‘ow!’ from his middlest.

Walking down the stairs he could hear his youngest chanting something like ‘fight! Fight! Fight!’ which obviously made him move faster.

He rounded the corner to see his oldest and middlest in the middle of a circle, each with one of his boxing gloves on as they circled each other.

“The heck are you guys doing??” They all turned to face him, that was when he noticed they had drawn on themselves to, what he guessed, look like pro-wrestlers, the basement was also a mess.

“Having a cage match, it’s 2 for 2 so far, this round decides the world-class-gladiator-basement-fight-to-the-death match, and the loser gets sacrificed.”

He almost let it go as his boys were being normal boys, until the last part hit him.

“Wait- what?! Sacrificed to who?!” His son giggled, “I don’t know, it’s only pretend, daddy.” Deciding he could no longer bear their empty stares he made them clean up the basement before spending the next 1 ½ hours cleaning off marker.

Futakuchi Kenji:

You guys had taken your 3 girls to the park to have a play-date/picnic with Aone and his wife/kids.

You were sitting and chatting away with his wife, while Aone and Futakuchi talked about their high school days, Aone gladly telling Futakuchi’s embarrassing moments.

Your youngest daughter was 3, and so far it has proven to be the worst of any age they had experienced yet.

Or rather...he had experienced yet.

For you, she was a perfect little angel, sweet and giggly, super cuddly and very much a momma’s girl.

But towards her daddy? She held nothing but malice. She would often smack him and run away to you giggling, or scrunch her nose up at him when he tried to get a hug or kiss.

You guys didn’t know what brought on this sudden hatred, but you were sure it would pass someday.

Your baby girl had waddled up to the picnic blanket and plopped herself down on your lap, playing with some nearby grass as the more adults continued to talk.

Deciding to try his luck, Futakuchi got the attention of your daughter.

“Hey, why don’t you come sit in Daddy’s lap.”

Your daughter turned towards him and shook her head, “No.”

Futakuchi pouted, “Why not?” Your little girl huffed as she only turned her head this time.

“Because I don’t even like you dada.” She then plopped her head back down on your chest while you and Mrs. Aone started laughing and Futakuchi’s face showed only pain.

“hEy! I helped make you, the least you can show me is some gratitude!” Your youngest only stuck her tongue out at him, causing an audible chuckle out of Aone and more pain for Futakuchi.

Daishou Suguru:

When you and Daishou had your first child, your daughter, you never had a hard time getting her to sleep.

But for some reason, lately she had been getting out of her bed in the middle of the night, with seemingly no reason.

Now, don’t get me wrong. Daishou loves his little girl.

But sometimes...kids can be creepy, and yours were no different.

When she woke up at these awful hours of the night, she’d just go to you guys’ room and...stand there...she wouldn’t say anything, just stand there with her teddy bear in one arm and the other hanging limply at her side.

It was almost 3 am, so naturally Daishou had long since been asleep.

He had just rolled over to the edge of the bed to grab some water when he almost screamed.

Standing right there was his daughter, just standing there, watching him.

He sat up, rubbing his eyes as he took a deep breath.

“I- go back to sleep, it’s late.” Your daughter just nodded, turned around, and walked out of your room and back into her own.

Heart still beating out of his chest he got his sip of water, laid back down and tried to go to sleep, which proved difficult with the blank stare of his child still stuck in his mind.

Numai Kazuma:

You, Numai, and your 4 children had taken a road trip as your big summer vacation.

Currently, you were all driving through this cute little town on the out skirts of one of the cities.

Two of your boys were sleeping, one reading his picture book, and your youngest and only girl was looking out the window.

You had taken a turn driving while Numai had taken a small nap, although he had woken up a little bit ago.

You guys had gotten to the outskirts of this small town, and were coming up on a cemetery.

Your daughter was 4, so she knew what a cemetery was. You guys weren’t too worried, she had grown up with 3 older brothers so things like bugs or ghost stories never really bothered her too much.

You and Numai had started talking to each other when you heard your daughter speak up.

“Hey mommy, hey daddy,” You took a peak into the rear-view mirror, your husband turning to look at his daughter.

“Yeah baby? What is it?” Your husband asked as he smiled towards his little girl.

Smiling, she turned towards the window and pointed to the cemetery.

“That’s where all the dead people are.”

Numai blinked as he just nodded and turned back around in his seat, slumping down as his eyes held a certain ‘deer in headlights’ look, slowly turning to see you as he pointed towards your daughter than to you.

“That came from your genes, not mine-” He winced when you slapped his arm, shaking your head as you too tried to erase the utter creepiness you were feeling after that.

Iizuna Tsukasa:

Iizuna yawned as he walked out of the master bedroom, having just woken up from a 3 hour nap.

Today had been a particularly intense game, which they had won, but had left him exhausted.

You were downstairs in the bathroom, working on washing the magic-marker your other children had put there off of your 10 month old baby while your 2 oldests were upstairs in time out where you left them.

Iizuna walked through the hallway, smiling as he heard his two oldests talking and playing. Or at least, it sounded like they were playing.

Recently, your oldest, your daughter who’s barely 4 and your son who just turned 2 had been bickering all the time, fighting over toys and had resorted to pinching.

When you had caught them and put them in time out, Iizuna was dead asleep, so he didn’t know his kids were supposed to be in timeout, and at the ages they were at it wasn’t unusual to see them play together.

Turning the corner his smile dropped as he sprinted towards his kids, watching in horror as his oldest pushed the middlest down the stairs, simply watching as her brother tumbled as Iizuna lost 10 years of his life.

Quickly scolding his daughter he ran down the stairs and carefully grabbed your son, who thankfully had no injuries, heart beating out of his chest as he sighed.

You, having heard tumbles and then tears, speedily rounded the corner with your now marker-free child in your arms.

It was safe to say neither of you knew how to respond to that, your oldest simply waving from the top of the stairs as Iizuna now has a significant amount of trauma.

[rayofsunas]

 haikyuu!! as dads (pt.1)

A/n: hello! starting off with a clean slate here yay! if some of the first few seem so short and the writing seems different, it’s because I wrote half of this like three days ago- anywways, requests are open btw!!

Summary: haikyuu characters as dads/domestic living. 

Pairings: Semi Eita, Bokuto Koutarou, Kuroo Tetsurou, Oikawa Toru, Kenma Kozume 

Warnings: some timeskip spoilers, fluff, parenting, angst (kinda) swearing (maybe), crack, all characters are aged up

Word count: 1.8k 

Part Two!

Semi Eita

- the serious sometimes scary looking dad, but other than that he’s a fluff ball

- he may look scary but he simply cannot punish them for anything 

- especially after they bonded over music, legit cannot do nothing wrong

- on the days he’s not working or with his bandmates, you can often find him with his twin daughters, teaching them how to use different musical instruments 

- okay, so your daughters are still pretty young, so they aren’t very good at using most instruments, but for Christmas you and Semi got them both a small set of drums, something easy

- it was very cute to come home from work to see your husband and daughters loudly practicing on the drums

- sure at first it gave you a blasting headache, but after a while you got used to it, and even jammed out with them when you had the time

- mainly just random sounds/beats coming from the two five year olds, but Semi doesn’t mind, he’s willing to teach them and he does proudly 

- if one of his daughters or both wants too

- definitely writes songs for his daughters and you

- i can see him writing lullaby’s for them and working on them for hours making sure they were perfect

- lets just say they were perfectly beautiful 

- because you went to high school together, the nickname “semi semi” stuck with you (thanks chicken tendo)

- but your girls will also cutely call him “semi semi”

- you often bring them to concerts despite semi saying it’s probably too loud for them

- he’ll let you sit safely with them back stage uwu

- after he runs back to you three and is bombarded with hugs, high-fives and kithes

- YOU’RE ALL SO PROUD OF HIM

Bokuto Koutarou

- bokuto is a hyper dad, which we all saw coming. there is no taking the child out of bo

- i feel like he’d want tons of kids, probably even uses his children as an excuse to act the way he does

- i can see him with a few kids, 3 to be exact (2 boys and 1 girl)

- he likes to be really involved with his children, and gets very sad/emo when he doesn’t see them for short/long periods of time

- for example, the Black Jackals is a whole different game field than high school volleyball and it’s much more time consuming and has him away a lot 

- when he does come home and has time off, let’s just say he clings to his children like a puppy

- even after a while THEY get sick of him and wanna ditch him, cue emo bo :(

- if his children gang up on him (which they do) cue emo Bo again :(

- he babies them all, can’t ever say no

- tends to go back on his word lmao

- if your oldest son begs and begs for season tickets to his favorite sports team? Bo KNOWS they can be expensive, and he was even scolded by you, but two hours after saying no, he runs back to his son and gives him the money 

- if your daughter wants to get her nails done with a group of friends, he knows she picks out the most expensive polishes, etc, BUT HE DOES NOT CARE, he will gladly give her the money and even go with her to get his nails done 

- yes, you heard me

- of course he’ll being chaperone for this girls day, he promises to pretend that he doesn’t know them and keep his distance (sit very far away lol), but after a little while its just hard to contain and he’s screaming to everyone in the salon that his daughter is sitting on the other side of the room eye- 

- your youngest son wants an expensive sports car? done

- he just wants to make his family happy, pleaseee

 Kuroo Tetsurou 

- poor Kuroo, he has 2 daughters and you, so he’s surrounded by girls lol 

- he actually doesn’t mind it tbh

- between you and his two daughters, he wouldn’t have it any other way

- just gives him an excuse to be overly protective

- anywhere in public, expect either kuroo holding your hand

- or holding his daughters close to him (piggy back rides, yes)

- or, he stands protectively behind you and your daughters while you talk to someone, sending them threatening glares behind your backs 

- he was shy as a child, so it wasn’t surprising when one of his daughters, the youngest, was very very shy

- he doesn’t mind once again, just gives him an excuse to be protective 

- although he’s busy, he always makes time for his girls ALWAYS

- definitely a bragger

- if his family is brought into a convo, he pridefully will express how cute and smart his daughters are, may or may not openly declare his daughters are the cutest amongst his co-workers children

- he’s mad intuitive and aware/observant

- kuroo always knows when one or both of his daughters are about to start crying/throw a fit

- cue dad kuroo prepared to crack funny chemistry and or science jokes

- his shy daughter finds him very funny, doubles over every time he cracks a joke and calls him a “silly rooster”

- even when she's older she still laughs and even copies his jokes

- but his other daughter just cringes, every time sigh

- when she was younger she used to fake the laughs, but when he started saying the jokes in public she just stopped reacting, hoping he would stop-

- he didn’t...

- i like to imagine kuroo and kenma staying friends even after high school, and since kenma has hella video games and a whole arcade in his house, he’ll often bring his daughters over to his house

- his eldest daughter loves it at uncle kenma’s house

- cue jealous rooster dad

Oikawa Toru 

- okay so oikawa is ALWAYS busy

- isn’t home much, except during off seasons or if he messes up his knee again (yes, it’ll happen) 

- in the event that he’s home due to a knee injury, he’ll wanna be catered too lmaooo

- he doesn’t expect his little girl to cater to him and really only teases you about it

- but his daughter will get him whatever he needs while he’s propped up on the couch

- she admires him so much

- his daughter kinda has a smart mouth-

- definitely got that from him, having picked up on it from a young age, while he was home

- when he was home once propped up with a messed up knee, she went “here dadkawa” as she handed him an ice pack

- he laughs at the nickname, asking you about where it came from later

“she was on call with hajime’s daughter yesterday... hajime asked how ‘poopykawa’ was doing”

- he just rolls his eyes, “at least he cleaned it up for her sake” you explained 

- will not lose the “kawa” part, so it’s dadkawa lol

- when he’s away, she’s always asking for dadkawa

- when he’s here they're inseparable

- morning breakfast now will be her sitting in his lap instead of yours

- she asks to watch cartoons with him instead of you :(

- bath time consists of her arguing with you as you try to wash her hair, while oikawa sits on the closed toilet seat laughing to himself

- “mommy i want dadkawa to wash my hair!”

- “you always whine that he gets soap in your eyes”

- “I don’t care!”

- when you bring your daughter to games, she’ll be cheering him on proudly, “mommy, look at dadkawa!” “GO DADKAWA!!!!”

- since he plays for the professional Argentine team, i figure you all live in Argentina now, traveling from Argentina and Japan was tiring, so you moved to be closer

- when the news approaches him after or before games, he makes sure to show his daughter off and the whole time it’s his daughter stealing the show

- she might be shy at first, but as long as dadkawa is holding her, she’s fine

- he’ll teach her Spanish, defiantly sings happy birthday to her in Spanish because it’s special

- he calls her his princesa (princess in spanish)

Kenma Kozume 

- if his child didn’t enjoy video games like him or any of his hobbies like volleyball, I feel like Kenma would have a hard time with them

- he loves his son yes, but he’d have a hard time interacting with him, especially if he’s not into video games or volleyball

- if he is though, you can often find the two in kenma’s home office, playing games

- when your son was a infant, you would always come home from being out/work to find your son sitting in his pj’s on kenma’s lap watching his dad play video games 

- “it’s late, ken. i see he’s already in his pj’s- did you already have dinner?” “yes”

- “without me?” you asked, lifting up your son to give his cheeks kisses. “there’s apple pie in the fridge.”

- eye-

- yes he fed your son that, yes he needs a little guidance, yes he needs to be told apple pie is NOT dinner

- on another occasion of coming home, you found your boys in the same spot, once again playing video games, your sons eyes drifting between the game and his father every time he muttered under his breath 

- “the screen is bad for your eyes kenma, and he’s just a baby! he’ll get bad eyes too!”

- kenma’s short answer is, “he won’t” 

- when your son got older, and he started getting into video games, it got harder for you to tear his eyes away from the screen

- he’s been around video games his whole life, so of course it’d be hard, you just didn’t think he’d grow attached 

- kenma leaves most of the strict parenting to you, because he LEGIT doesn’t NOT know what to say

- he’s lowkey afraid he’ll push his son away if he says the wrong thing, but he’s also worried that if he doesn't say anything, they’ll have no real relationship, so he struggles 

- he tries his hardest to bond with him over video games and volleyball though

- as said by your son, kenma’s cooking can’t compare to yours, BUT he does know how to make a yummy apple pie

- his son will help kenma with said apple pie, when he’s younger he was often the taste tester and made a mess every time

- kenma gets nervous in huge crowds and really around anyone he doesn’t know, so if his son is a social butterfly he’ll try to get kenma used to people other than himself and you

- somehow, during the rare moments his son has problems (friends, school etc), kenma will be the one to speak up privately

- he’ll definitely tell his son to surround himself with a good friend/good friends, he also makes sure to let him know the importance of quality over quantity 

- he has a brotherly relationship with kuroo, and if not for kuroo he’d be alone, he wants the same thing for his son

10.20.20, rayofsunas 

[saksukei]

mermaid san au pt.1 [part 2]

(slight mentions of abuse but please know this does not glorify or support it in anyway)

this is really short Bec I have so much work to do and It isn't that good. Once again this post was inspired by warmau and they are one of my favorite writers so pls check them out!!

other mermaid aus; yunho yeosang

Your uncle used to run this really big circus that was super popular

like he earned a shit ton from it

He had clowns, acrobats, trained animals, trapeze acts, musicians, dancers, hoopers, tightrope walkers, jugglers, magicians, unicyclists etc

and he was also occasionally nice but really ,,,,, he was just another one of those assholes who were cheapskates, who did not care about the damage they did and definitely had a superiority complex

You always used to visit him during the summer vacations just as you were doing this time

He hadn't changed a bit honestly ,,,, he had just gotten streaks of white hair

“kiddo, I got a big surprise–if only it works, our circus will become such a big hit and we'll become billionaires for sure,” he explained.

“what'd you find this time?” you asked. “please don't say it's a skunk that knows how to do tricks.”

“no, it's even better!” he exclaimed as you followed him to the back, to his cabin.

“its also a secret so don't tell anyone,” he whispered as he opened the door.

You went inside and you saw this huge cage with walls made of glass and water inside it. The water was illuminated by some light in the room, but aside from that it was just dark.

“step closer–the jerk doesn't move from his place,” your uncle hissed, as his phone started to ring. “i have to take this call, so be careful,” he told you as he left the cabin.

You inched closer to the glass, hoping to see something inside.

and then you did ,,,,,,

a boy with black hair and red streaks covering his face, his arms folded and–

THE TAIL

the black tail

you couldn't see it clearly

but you were surprised bECAUSE WHERE DID YOUR UNCLE GET THAT???

you didn't even realize you were staring till

suddenly

you saw a pair of eyes staring at you

HE WAS RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOU AND OMG

melanin skin, a perfectly structured face, sharp jawline, a very visible Adam's apple and the curves of his muscles were very evident.

That jet black hair with red streaks of his was falling straight into his eyes and you made the assumption that the dude was an emo boy

You focused on his tail and it had diamond scales, black and red streaks just like his hair and it was so beautiful and magnificent omg

the boy looked at you with a certain curiosity

but then your uncle came in

“you got him to move!” your uncle exclaimed, causing you to jump up. “great let's take him to the other tank–” he called a few of his helpers and the only thing that you could see was ,,,,,

the look of betrayal in the mermaid's eyes that had trusted you enough to come close to see you

The next few days were awful

you couldn't get that look on his face out of your mind

like–???

and so you decided

When everybody would be asleep, you'd go out to the tank and find the mermaid and talk to him or whatever

and so you did

he was in this really large tank which was at the back

the top was open

so you climbed up the stairs that led to the top were a bit far from the tank itself

you just ,,,,, sorta sat there not knowing what to say as you fiddled with hoodie

“you know, I really hate that uncle of yours–” you heard a deep voice say and you looked up

the mermaid was right in the middle of the tank, doing back strokes.

“he's not that bad–” you replied.

“you're only saying that because he's your uncle but we both know he's an incoherent bastard–” the mermaid swam closer towards the stairs, where you were.

“d-don't say that, mister” you retorted.

“its San– not mister,” he told you.

“okay, well San ,,,,,,, I know my uncle sounds like this really bad man but he's just trying to make a living.”

“a living by killing– ironic don't you think?”

“fine, you win,” you sighed. “how did you get caught even? I thought mermaids never existed.”

“well, mermaids do exist, in a very large quantity too at that,” he explained. “i only got caught because I tried to save my best friend from being caught.”

“well, I'm sorry this happened,” you replied. “I'm afraid to tell you but I can't do much to get you out of here–”

“i know that– but for some weird reason I trust you enough to talk to you.”

“thank you for that–” you smiled. “is there anything you'd like that I can get? Food or maybe I don't know ,,,,, a seashell?”

He smiled

aND OH MY GOD???? HIS DIMPLES? HES A FLUFFY BABY IM– n e way

“no, nothing really– just make sure your uncle doesn't drown by accident,” he teased

“san I will kick your ass if he does.”

the next few days, you hung out with san late night

You found out that he had saved his best friend Wooyoung from being caught ,,,,, and like san is one of the most geniuine people to exist

he's so sweet, loving and caring omg

and you started feeling hella bad when in the mornings you'd see the entire circus practice and you saw your uncle train San and beat him up when he didn't perform

like your heart geniunely broke when you heard him yelp every time your uncle grabbed his hair

not only that ,,,,, you saw the line of purplish blue bruises staining his skin, even if he pretended they were nothing

and you wanted to literally push your uncle into the tank and say it was an accident

so you had finally decided,

you were going to break San out whether your uncle liked it or not

San didn't deserve this torture and you sure as hell didn't want to see him like this

you climbed up to the tank

“san–” you called out

“h-hey,” he replied as he got out of the water, as he came closer to you.

“san I want to get you out of here,” you explained. “but um can you walk outside water?”

“no I can't,” he broke eye contact as a sigh escaped his lips, “I'm fine here. I don't want to escape.”

“WHAT?” you yelled, a look of disbelief on your face. “san your entire body is covered in bruises, you're so much thinner than you first came here, heck i'd say you're practically dying,” you rambled on. “Yet here I am, helping you escape and you're saying 'no'?”

“yes, I'm saying no,” he answered. “i don't want to jeopardize your relationship with your uncle.”

“pardon my French but– what the fuck do you mean choi san? Do you think I care about some relationship when you're covered in bruises like this? I can't see you getting hurt like this– please. You don't deserve this.”

“i know but– you'll get hurt at the end of this and ,,,,,,, I just”

“just what?” you hissed.

“i won't be able to see you, anymore,” he answered shyly, as he looked down. “and I think that's worse than any punishment I'll ever get.”

[beyoncesdragon]

an introduction of VICTON♥︎༄

my favorite emo punk fairies of kpop, @aixy-hpsa bub buckle up.

-`about victon´-

Victon actually means Voice to New World or some, and we, the cult-followers, are to be yelled at by the name of ALICE. They debuted 2016 and have so far produced a bunch of mindblowing, amazing, superior, beautiful, showstopping (...) bops:

-`studio albums´-

Voice : The Future is Now (2021) *scream*

-`mini albums´-

Voice To New World (2016)

Ready (2017)

Identity (2017)

From. VICTON (2017)

Nostalgia (2019)

Continuous (2020)

-`single albums´-

"Time of Sorrow" (2018)

"Mayday" (2020)

they are amaaaaazing oke. look here have my favorite songs of them. (Yes I’m forcing my love for them down your throat now I’m sorry)

♥︎ - KANG SEUNGSIK - ♥︎

♥︎ 16. April 1995 ♥︎ 🐶 ♥︎ 🇰🇷 ♥︎

Leader!

He became Victons leader after Seungwoo started participating in Produce X 101 and then officially became Victons leader when Seungwoo came back from X1.

Vocalist! VOCALIST. VOCALIST

This man is blessed with a set of insane vocal chords and we all love him for it.

congratulations to Victon for being the only group with Kang Seungsik

He’s the mom of the group :,)

Supa caring dude, cleans up the mess of OT6

Is “Health” in persona, which kinda fits doesn’t it.

Naturally gets bullied by the younger ones.

EYE SMILE GANG

Also has dimples

Great leader and we should all respect him for it and give him never ending credits, victon wouldn’t be victon without him periodt.

♥︎ - HAN SEUNGWOO - ♥︎

♥︎ December 24, 1994 ♥︎ 🦊 ♥︎ 🇰🇷 ♥︎

Lead rapper, lead dancer, lead vocalist lead everything

Except Leader.

He gave that position up after he returned from X1 (where he by the way also was voted leader)

YOOO the members missed him so much they cried when he was gone

Visuals✨

Oh boy that man...dangerous

He has the funniest laugh? Like u would never expect that laugh to be his???

He. Has. His. Own. EP. And I dare everyone to listen to „Sacrifice“. It’s a masterpiece.

Seunggu also has tattoos!! 3 in total.

This dude is ripped yet u will probably catch him imitating goats and pikachu...?

Will roast the maknae but with love

Hes so much more than just his face.

♥︎ - DO HANSE - ♥︎

♥︎ 25. Sept. 1997 ♥︎ 🐱 ♥︎ 🇰🇷 ♥︎

Hello you’re looking at the loml

Main rapper.

(Of victon and of Kpop ex.1 and ex.2)

Sese ♥︎

Puts the sweet in sweetheart and really, he only looks like he could kill

TATTOOOOOS. SO. MANY. OF. THEM.

Semicolon on his wrist; cross on his left shoulder and chest (he church boi); roses on his arm: writings on his collar bone; so many more

bestest sense of fashion hands down

Iconic lip ring

His own solo EP is on the way!!!

Somehow this man is also main dancer

MIC FLIPS OWO

Talented boy.

♥︎ - LIM SEJUN - ♥︎

♥︎ May 4, 1996 ♥︎ 🍓 ♥︎ 🇰🇷 ♥︎

You are looking at an icon here

Most coziest-est VLives in history of Vlives

Easily scared (victon does enjoy that, naturally)

Very whiny but it’s oke

Lead Vocalist, Visual, Face of the Group

Insane vocals too, here ex.1

Another member of kpops cucumbers-anti squad

He’s very much BTS fanboy (not as much as Wooyoung but that’s hard anyways)

Competitive eater (listen, the maknae said that and we will believe him)

Will never leave Subin do a Vlive in peace ever

Will Never leave Subin live in peace ever either

Clingy boy

Walking noise-machine, he goes “ouh? Oh? Eh?” Like 372892 times a day

So much love for the dimple-prince

♥︎ - HEO CHAN - ♥︎

♥︎ December 14, 1995 ♥︎ 🦖 ♥︎ 🇰🇷 ♥︎

May I introduce...SUNSHINE OF VICTON ☀️

Mood maker of the group!

Mr Main Dancer and Vocalist also has dimples

And even tho he wanted to be a dance instructor, he somehow ended up becoming an idol

He even trained with TBZ mr leader sir Sangyeon

Mans can drive!!

Like Lee Know, he once was a backup dancer. For A-Pink tho, which is pretty cool

Hes considered the uncle in our lovely family dynamic

Expensive boi be collecting sHOES

And he said he polishes them from time to time and I do think that’s adorable

He’s also allergic to cats (unless it’s Hanse. That’s okay ig)

Cutest sunny boy, will take good care of your heart always☀️💛

♥︎ - CHOI BYUNGCHAN - ♥︎

♥︎ November 12, 1997 ♥︎ 🐥 ♥︎ 🇰🇷 ♥︎

Welcome to Victon where everyone has a mandatory crush on Byung

Like he doesn’t even have to enter your biasline

You will still have a crush on him because Byungchan

Softest biaswrecker i have ever had 112/10 would recommend

Tall boi. Like really tall and really broad👀

I keep forgetting he’s maknae line tbh

Prettiest Dimples ever.

Very active on his Instagram and we love him for it

Top tier bf material

Hes the softest boy and yet only one who isn’t scared of fucking bugs (victon scaredy cats)

Try not falling too hard for the mister

He knows so many girlfroup dances

He also shows them off quite always

He’s a bit tinie liddol but clumsy sometimes

Gosh I love him

♥︎ - JUNG SUBIN - ♥︎

♥︎ April 5, 1999 ♥︎ 🐰 ♥︎ 🇰🇷 ♥︎

Vocalist, Rapper, Heart-stealer, Actor...

AND MOST LOVED MAKNAE EVER

Like I don’t know if any maknae ever received as many kisses as this one

Gets (rightfully) babied to the Max by every. Single. One. Of. Them.

24/7

He’s also a babie. Like yes he’s a grown man and he looks hella intimidating on stage but-

It’s Subin

He’s also the smolest in Victon (uwu)

At the same time, maknae on top, this man gets everything (except his own room lmao) he wants

Sometimes not so baby (ex.1)

Saiubin-bby was supposed to debut with Pentagon but he yeeted last minute (we thank)

The child himself has children too: dog Toto and 2 cats: Mimi and Jaws.

He’s close friends with my favourite, formerly pink-haired elf-twink Yeonjun of TXT

Chairman of Victon.

he has the BEST insta user: subsubey.

Best boi.

-`very valid victon-moments to begin with´-

- because its pride: 🌈

- general victon-feelsies: 🌸

- for bad mood: ☀️

- moments when you want to question their sanity: 🌻 🌼 🌺 🌹

- victon being talented on studio CHOOM

- victon being talented whilst covering kehlanis "Gangsta"

alright that was long. and yes they are exactly as loud and noisy and annoying and time consuming as they seem but they are also best boys who can bring very much happiness into ones life, so they are very much worth it

[emsvegetables]

okay but like i screamed when i saw your requests are open, ( after reading the pregnancy hcs ) if it's fine with u - you can totally not do this if you don't like it - may i request headcanons with the same boys you did with the pregnancy hcs but with their father-daughter/son relationship with them headcanons? i'm a sucker for those HAHA. thank you again if you ever consider, love ♡♡

“okay but like i screamed when i saw your requests are open, ( after reading the pregnancy hcs ) if it's fine with u - you can totally not do this if you don't like it - may i request headcanons with the same boys you did with the pregnancy hcs but with their father-daughter/son relationship with them headcanons? i'm a sucker for those HAHA. thank you again if you ever consider, love ♡♡”

AHHH OFC!!!! hi @karasunology this is for you, you’re so sweet!!!!! hope you like these <33!!!! i’m not sure if i interpreted it correctly fifkfjrrj i rewrote this THREE TIMES FIEIDIFIF also i made the child a daughter haha hope that’s okay!!!

Oikawa:

* he’ll love his child SO much!!!!!!!!

* anyway he’s REALLY excited for little (Y/N) to come out!!!!!!!

* he’s with you throughout the entire birth process, and he tries his best not to cry when you curse him and say that you’re never having a baby with him again.

* AHAHAHAHA ITS SO PAINFUL BUT HE DOESN’T KNOW THAT LMAO

* and when she pops out of the womb?

* he is CRYING and calling Iwaizumi to tell him how cute she looks.

* “IWA-CHAN!!!!! SHE’S SO CUTE AND—“

* Iwaizumi hangs up on him LOL

* but afterwards he’s softly running his fingers through your hair after it’s all over, and telling you that he loves you.

* but anyways the Seijoh third years come to visit little (Y/N) every weekend and they always bring so much things for her to play with!!!!

* but it’s obvious Iwaizumi is little (Y/N)’s favourite uncle LOL

* she looks like she LIKES Iwaizumi more than Oikawa AHAHAH

* she’ll crawl to him and always reach for him and he’ll happily hug her!!! Oikawa is SO jealous lmaoooo

* but when little (Y/N) can start walking and talking, MAN.

* Oikawa is instantly teaching her how to play volleyball!!!!

* he’s teaching her how to set, and how to receive balls!!!

* her uncles come over to play with her every weekend and you find it really cute, when you poke your head out into the backyard and see four grown men cooing over your little girl!!!!

* but she grows up to love spiking more thanks to her uncle Iwaizumi!!!!!!

* Oikawa’s VERY salty about that LMAOOO but he’ll set to her all the time to practice!!!

* he and her are the total power team!!!

* he’ll go to ALL her games and he’ll happily point her out to you when you’re looking for her!

* and when she gets a spike in??

* “YOU GO GIRL!!!! MAKE YOUR FATHER PROUD!!!!”

* he’s also a super supportive father!!!!

* but he’ll draw a line at relationships AHAHA

* he’ll know how disgusting high school boys are (CONSIDERING HOW HE WAS AHAH) and he’ll gather the Seijoh third years and scare that boy away.

* Matsukawa is the scariest bc he actually is really intimidating HAH.

* and Hanamaki manages to scare them away bc he threatens MURDER AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

* but anyway your daughter has to BEG him to stop after he scares the seventh boy away.

* you just laugh as he tries to make excuses to what he did.

Kuroo:

* aw this man!!!!!!

* i’ve said before in a previous hc, i THINK his parents had some sorta tension between them and hence he had to live with his grandparents.

* so growing up, he never really had active parents in his life!!! so he’s promising himself that he’s going to treat you and little (Y/N) right.

* and when little (Y/N) comes out of the womb!!!!! he’s SO SO SO happy, and he’s smiling so widely and tears are rolling down his cheeks.

* he’s praising you on how well you did during the entire process, and he’s kissing your forehead and saying how proud he is of you.

* but he’s SO SO SO HAPPY!!!! and he’s immediately telling Kenma and the third gym squad!!!!!!

* okay but Kenma occasionally pops over to your house every few weeks to give little (Y/N) toys and stuff, and you have to tell him to STOP bc he’s spending so much money!!!!!

* ZRIEOTKGK

* but Bokuto, Akaashi and Tsukishima also come over to play with little (Y/N)!!!!

* it’s obvious her favourite is Akaashi, bc he’s the most gentle with her, and she’s always crawling up to him and hitting his thighs.

* Bokuto always goes into emo mode whenever she choose Akaashi over him LOL

* anyway.

* he’s teaching little (Y/N) volleyball when she can stand up and walk!!!

* and he’s such a big influence on her life that she actually ASPIRES to be a middle blocker just like him!

* he always brings you to all her games when the both of you can make it, and occasionally the third gym squad will make an appearance too!!!!

* when she blocks the other team????

* there’s two people screaming on the second floor.

* “THATS MY DAUGHTER!!!”-kuroo

* “WOOOO GOOOO LITTLE (Y/N)!!!”-bokuto

* Akaashi and Tsukishima just exchange looks like: wtf is wrong with them.

* he’s also a really, really supportive father.

* he’s so close to her, and he really understands her so well, just like how he understands you.

* he’ll let her talk to him about anything, but he also knows when to give her space to work out her problems when she needs to!!!

* overall super supportive.

* REALLY GREAT FATHER.

* though he gets a TAD protective when little (Y/N) starts to talk about her boyfriend to the both of you.

* but he trusts her!!!! so it’s all good!!!!!

Kenma:

* ahhh!!! he’s actually prepared for little (Y/N) to come out.

* like.

* he’s already bought all the stuff needed for babies, and he’s already put it in the room.

* and when your water breaks??? he’s bringing you to the hospital, with a very calm face, because he’s researched on what to do and he made sure to get the BEST doctor on your case!

* and when little (Y/N) comes out?

* he’s so proud, and you see this lone tear slide down his cheek, and he’s pressing a soft kiss onto her forehead, before pressing one to your lips, and telling you that he loves you so much.

* anyway he immediately tells Hinata what happened, and after Hinata jokes about little (Y/N) not being named after him, he congratulates the both of you through the speaker!!

* Kuroo finds out a few minutes later, after Hinata hangs up and Kenma texts him, and he also congratulates you happily, and berates Kenma over not telling him first AHAHAH

* N E WAYS

* Kenma. is literally and figuratively A SUGAR DADDY TO LITTLE (Y/N).

* this guy???

* a new toy shows up in a parcel outside the house EVERY day, and you have to PLEAD him to stop buying little (Y/N) presents when the drawers start to overflow AHAHA

* Kenma merely shrugs, and gets another cupboard built in the room to store more toys, and shoots a small smile at you when you sigh.

* “i have money to spare, babe.”

* “WE HAVE TOO MUCH TOYS, KO.”

* tbh he won’t teach volleyball to (Y/N), bc he’s lazy AHAHA

* BUT when she inevitably picks it up thanks to her uncles Kuroo and Hinata, he’s cursing them silently in his head when your daughter asks him to play with her.

* he will not be able to refuse her and he’ll actually play with her until SHE’S tired, bc he loves her so much!!!!

* she ends up wanting to be a setter, and he teaches her all his hacks and techniques to get out of practice if she’s tired AHAHA

* he’ll try his best to make it to all her games, and he won’t shout whenever she scores, but instead grip your hands really tightly and mumble a cheer under his breath.

* he’s a really chill dad, tbh.

* like, he’ll never scold your daughter if she’s in the wrong.

* all the discipline is up to you AHAHAH

* he also doesn’t get worked up over her having her boyfriend over for dinner, and instead asks the boy what games he plays.

* the protectiveness gets handed over to uncle Kuroo!!!!!!! who’s instantly firing a barrage of questions at the poor boy.

* “stop it, Kuro.”

* “BUT KENMA, this boy is trying to make his moves on little (Y/N)!!!!”

Sugawara:

* aw HES SUCH A SWEET GUY.

* he’s so PUMPED for little (Y/N)’s delivery.

* and when your little baby pops out???

* this guy is CRYING.

* tears are rolling down his cheeks and he’s SMILING so much as he holds little (Y/N) in his arms.

* he’s SO happy, and he’s telling you that straight to your face as you lie back down on the hospital bed.

* he’s pressing a soft kiss on your cheek before he’s texting the Karasuno group chat WIDIFIFIR

* they’re all so happy!!! and they swarm into the hospital like the maniacs they are to see little (Y/N).

* but when your baby can walk and talk???

* you BET that the entire team is coming to your house EVERY weekend to play volleyball with her.

* little (Y/N) ends up loving Nishinoya the most, and he excitedly teaches her the ROLLING THUNDER move, but Sugawara scolds him when she rolls wrongly and ends up with a gash on her cheeks.

* Nishinoya is BANNED from returning to your house AHAHA KDG

* okay she ends up being a libero like her favourite uncle!!

* and whenever she has a match?

* the ENTIRE team is going there to cheer her on.

* i’m not even lying.

* she’ll save a ball, and all her middle-aged uncles start screaming and cheering, causing her to blush in embarrassment.

* Sugawara and Daichi have to calm them down AHAHAHAH.

* but when she undergoes changes and starts getting male attention???

* man Tanaka and Nishinoya are NOT going to let that happen.

* they’ll be protecting her like how they protected Shimizu AHAHA

* but the most scariest is HER DAD, SUGAWARA KOSHI.

* he’ll smile widely at the boy who your daughter brings home, and that smile is the scariest you’ve seen on his face.

* AHAHAH the poor boy’s TERRIFIED of Sugawara LMAO

Asahi:

* OH!!! this pure, sweet man.

* he’s so SHOCKED when your water breaks.

* he’ll be running around the house and freaking out AHAHA and you have to call the ambulance yourself LOL

* and when little (Y/N) pops out????

* he’s CRYING.

* he’s SOBBING.

* he’s SHAKING.

* he’s so scared!!!! what if your baby doesn’t like him?????

* he’s instantly texting the third years at Karasuno for help LOL

* but they tell him to chill and just hold the baby in his arms!!!

* and he starts to cry again AHAHAH

* but anyway your baby will have the CRAZIEST UNCLES.

* literally your baby is showered with LOVE AND AFFECTION by the entire Karasuno team!!!!!!

* your baby’s favourite is Daichi!!! bc he’s the gentlest with her, and she’ll always wiggle out of Asahi’s arms to go to Daichi.

* ANY WAY

* she ends up being a wing spiker like her father!!!!!

* Asahi’s so proud he starts to cry AGAIN.

* but whenever she has a match????

* the entire team is going AHAHAH

* Nishinoya and Tanaka ARE SCREAMING when she gets a spike in.

* Asahi will just tear up bc he’s so PROUD.

* oh and Asahi’s the MOST SUPPORTIVE DAD.

* he’s always letting her do whatever she wants!!!!!

* and he supports everything that she does!!!!!

* and when she brings a boyfriend home???

* tbh he’s totally fine with that, bc his baby is all grown up, after all.

* but the boy’s scared bc of Asahi’s LOOKS AHAHAHAHAHAH

* your daughter has to tell him to smile more bc her boyfriend is scared of her father’s face AHAHAHAHAH

JRRKFKFK HI IM SO SORRY IF THIS ISNT WHAT YOU WANTED FIRIFIFI i tried my best to write this!!! i hope it’s okay!!!!!!!!

[punprincess321]

a mchanzo r/prorevenge story!

(this will be told from Hanzo’s POV and will be told like most reddit stories, I've always loved prorevenge so I came up with one, this story has mentions of child molestation, running away and mention of injuries gained from abuse, if you’re easily triggered by court, drastic family disputes or the foster/adoption system then please don’t read, I don’t want you to feel bad)

I’ve tried to make it my personal goal to not hold grudges or seek revenge against others but in this situation it had to be done. But I should first tell you my backstory so you understand why I broke my vow of peace:

I (38M) have a WONDERFUL husband, who I’ll call J (37M) whom I met through many coincidental encounters during my travels, we finally ended the anonymity and finally talked to each other, we had so much in common and we decided to travel together, apparently my brother was his friend from the military but we had a bad fallout years ago due to our home life and upbringing, back then my brother’s words were less than kind but J heard my side and understood I was in a bad place when my brother and I had our fight. (we’re okay now)

He’s been my rock ever since, showing me I deserve to have the happy life with my little brother I always wanted and helping me with my depression and drinking habit, also showing me violence isn't always the solution. It wasn’t long before he proposed, J’s a writer so he was quite wealthy and he bought me a half a million dollar sapphire engagement ring! It was engraved with the pet name he usually calls me (huckleberry) and was made of platinum, I was overjoyed and couldn’t wait to marry him!

We’ve been living happily in Texas in J’s hometown, we have a beautiful home and three beautiful kids, this story revolves around our eldest daughter and how we finally got her horrible family out of her life for good.

THE BEGINNING

J and I really wanted a family so we went to the orphanage to have a trial run with some of the kids to see if any of them could fit with us as a family, we held lots of infants, played with toddlers and read with some of the elementary level kids, we decided to then see the older children. There was only one teenager, a 15 year old girl who dressed like an early 2000′s emo punk rocker girl, black hair with red highlights, black tank top, ripped jeans, combat boots, chains, rings and earrings galore, the orphanage owner told us she was a runaway from California who escaped her abusive family and pedo uncle, J and I talked to her and she took a huge interest in my tattoo which was a full sleeved blue dragon, she talked about how she wanted to be a nail and tattoo artist and I admired how passionate she was about art and music, J was more intrigued by her passion for flowers as he had a rose garden in our backyard which he was very proud of. That day J and I took home our new teenage daughter Ivy along with a young boy named Cory and his baby sister named Tracy.

We gave Ivy the loft bedroom in the attic so she could have her own space which she instantly painted magenta and black, we put Tracy and Cory in the same room but we kept one room vacant if Cory wanted his own place, all of them were happy to finally have a family and we were also very happy to be raising children better than our parents had done for us, it was fun to hear Ivy rock out to her favourite music while working on a tattoo or nail design, J built the younger kids a jungle gym and he loved playing catch in the backyard with Cory and watching Tracy learn how to walk was so rewarding, with J's money we could give the kids the best education and the childhood they deserved with toys and good clothes, Tracy and Cory actually saw me as the mother and call me 'mom' or 'mommy', Ivy just calls me by my name but she mostly defaults to "Otosan" since she learned I was Japanese, the kids got along wonderfully and Ivy was proud to be a big sister. Those first few months were the best... Until THEY showed up.

apparently Ivy’s family got word that their child had been adopted by two men and were outraged, they wanted her back... We of course refused because Ivy was ours now and she had no desire to leave, Ivy hid in her room when her uncle came to our house to try and take her, J and I scared him off with our threatening appearances and J’s gun but we knew this wasn’t over, for the first time since I’ve known Ivy, I saw her cry... I hugged her and promised I wasn’t going to let her go.

THE HARRASSMENT

Unfortunately we were right about it not being over, for the next year and a half, J and I were drowning in court summons and threatening letters, we couldn’t let Ivy out of the house because we could tell her family were waiting to pounce, Ivy had to do school online because her mother tried to pull her into her car while she had been waiting for the bus and she became to scared to leave the house, she even had to go with us to each summon and at the last one she actually cussed out her entire family, saying how they did nothing but berate her, would take her uncle’s side when she told them about the abuse and how she even had an abortion at 14 because of him... She even went as far to take off her shirt in court and tell the story of every scar on her body to the judge, her family’s lawyer, the bailiff and other litigants waiting for their cases, it was graphic... The judge offered us a full term restraining order against Ivy’s family, the restraining order went through and we thought it was over, oh how wrong we were...

THE INCIDENT

We hadn’t seen the lunatics in a couple months and thought all was normal but J still drove Ivy to school out of precaution, we even put up cameras and an electric fence on our property to keep the kids safe in case someone thought they had an opening... One day we got a call from Ivy, she was crying and J was in papa bear mode and asked her in that famous Texan accent; “Who in God’s name made you cry sugarcube?!”

Ivy explained through her sobs that she had been called to the office saying her parents were there, thinking it was J and I she went there and saw it was her uncle and her emotionally abusive mother... They grabbed her and tried to pull her out of the school, before they made it to the door, her uncle sneakily put his hand down her shirt and groped her... saying she was his forever... she screamed and bit him hard, he let go and she ran and hid in one of the small study rooms in the library, she barricaded herself inside, J stayed on the phone with her as I called the police and we drove to the high school with Cory and Tracy sitting confused in the backseat, the police escorted the mom and uncle off the property and we had to coax Ivy out of the room, it broke my heart when I saw her mascara and eyeliner running down her cheeks. I held her as we drove home and she clung to me begging for J and I to not leave her, this was the last straw.

THE REVENGE

J made sure that the school would only allow us to pick up Ivy and if they wanted to confirm if someone could take her, they had to call us and give us their name and a physical description but I knew this still wasn’t over and I began to plan, I tracked all of these abusive douchebags down on social media and found all I needed, their phone numbers, home addresses and job titles and contacts, apparently they had been putting up this front of a huge happy family and their child living with us was throwing a wrench in their plans, they were all in very cushy job positions but that’s not all, I managed to find some of their coworkers who were very frustrated with how these people were brown nosing their way up the ladder but they were complete jerks to their coworkers, the men of the families harassed female subordinates and the women were notorious for spreading lies, I managed to get all of them to give me their evidence.

I sent all of this to their places of employment and waited... We soon got confirmation that they had gotten on the next flight back to LA and for the first time in so long... Ivy was able to get on the bus and come home without having to be afraid. A few weeks passed and some of the coworkers got back to me about what happened and what they told me was AMAZING! Ivy's uncle had his work computer searched and there was a mountain of child... pictures on there, the police were called and his house was raided where they found more evidence and even videos of him assaulting other kids... He was arrested immediately and won't be out of prison until he's a weak old man.

Ivy's parents and relatives were looked into as well, they had lied to their bosses to get sick leave to come and harass us, and all the evidence their coworkers had got them fired! But I was not done yet, these people had hurt my daughter, I was not going to let them off easy. I slandered them on social media, explaining how my husband and I were raising their daughter in Texas because her parents encouraged her uncle to force himself on her, Ivy's parents shot back saying Ivy went "missing" and we had kidnapped her but we proved that wrong immediately, apparently the orphanage made a video where they congratulated Ivy on finding an amazing family that loves and cares for her, they even included a slideshow of some pictures we had taken with her and the little ones, one being her hugging J on her 16th birthday because he got her a temporary tattoo crafting kit and building her her own nail salon in the basement.

Ivy's parents immediately lost all support, I would have gone further if J hadn't found out what I was up to, he said I did enough damage but I was still tempted to hire someone to burn down their house.

Ivy is doing great now that she knows her family isn't after her anymore, she's 17 and working on her portfolio for art school and has been treating all of us and her friends to manicures and pedicures, I know she'll have a great future doing what she loves. But sometimes I still wish I could burn down her crappy parents' house.

[comradelup]

@taz-channukah-event / dec 17th: author’s choice!

“Yeah… no, I get it… I’ll tell them, we’ll be fine,” Taako says into the phone, peering out the curtain. The snow falls in big fat flakes, and there’s billions of them. He can barely see the end of the driveway.

He walks away from the window and starts pacing back and forth, very much aware of the three pairs of eyes on him.

“We should just be a tiny bit late, it isn’t that bad,” Lup says over the phone.

“They can’t hear you, Lu.”

“…Yeah, we won’t make it.”

Taako sighs heavily, a hand coming to pinch the bridge of his nose. “Okay. Okay. That’s fine.”

“It’s not! We wanna spend Channukah with our babies!” Lup whines, sounding very much like a baby herself.

“Well, first off, your youngest is five, hardly babies,” Taako says, sending a grin the kids’ way as he says it. Gordie, the five year old in question, giggles. “Second, it’s just one night, they’ll be fine.”

“…I guess you’re right.”

“Of course I am!” Taako says jovially, placing a hand on his hip and winking at the kids. “Uncle Taako’s always right!”

“Yeah!” the kids cheer, and he can tell Lup heard it, because she laughs wetly.

“It’s settled then!” Taako announces, adopting a goofy gesture as he addresses his sister. “You and Daddy hide at Grandma Marlena’s house, while Uncle Taako and his anklebiter army fights off the snowstorm monster!”

Gordie and Izzy giggle at that; Jo is the oldest and least entertained by this but they still smile at the silliness, which makes Taako feel a little less bad about how ridiculous he must look right now. He’s learned that uncle-hood means a lot of sacrificing your dignity for kids.

Izzy says, “Can we say bye to Mommy?”

“Duh!” Taako says, and he puts the phone on speaker to let the kids yell at Lup.

He lets them trade goodbyes and “Happy Channukah”s and everything else that parents and kids talk about. Once the call’s over, he pockets his phone and claps his hands together.

“So! We’re home alone with free reign of the place.” He leans down to grin conspiratorially at them. “What do we do first?”

“Let’s make latkes!” Gordie exclaims.

“I wanna play dreidel,” Izzy says.

“And what about you, fireball?” Taako asks Jo.

“I, uh… I gotta go to the bathroom,” Jo says quickly, standing up and darting away.

That’s… probably something to look into later. But for now Taako lets them go, yelling after them, “Make sure to wash your hands, dirty bird!”

The other two giggle, as intended. Taako crouches before them and says to Gordie, “But I guess I should be telling you that, huh pipsqueak?”

Izzy laughs at him. “Yeah, babies need their diaper changed.”

“I’m not a baby! I’m five,” Gordie says, holding up his hand for emphasis.

“Oh yeah? Well I’m seven,” Izzy says, holding up seven whole fingers while blowing a raspberry.

“And I’m four hundred and twenty-three,” Taako says, “Count that on your fingers.”

Izzy stares at her hands, trying to find a way to do that, but Taako scoops up Gordie into his arms before they get too into math, yuck.

“I’m up for latkes! Who said latkes?” he asks, spinning Gordie in a big circle to elicit a laugh from him.

“I did!” Gordie cheers.

“Then let’s go, latke boy!” Taako says, making an airplane noise as he flies Gordie into the kitchen, Izzy trailing after and saying something about getting a turn.

(Of course, she gets one. The duties of an uncle includes nearly tossing a tiefling girl into the air and not impaling yourself on the way down. At least she’s not the one who bursts into flame when too excited.)

They’re almost done with their first batch of pancakes when Jo leaves the bathroom. They sit down at the kitchen island looking rather gloomy. That’s not gonna fly, not in Taako’s (sister’s) kitchen.

“Hey, you’re ten, not sixteen, no emo angst,” Taako tells them, pointing a spatula at their face.

“I’m not emo,” they reply, sounding… empty.

Taako might not be as good an uncle as he thought; his kids shouldn’t be sounding like that.

“Gordie, Izzy,” Taako says, turning to his little sous-chefs. He tasked Izzy with (carefully) grating potatoes for their second batch and Gordie with cracking an egg into a bowl and (gently) beating it. But they both stop what they’re doing and turn to him.

He plasters on a mischievous smile and says, “Go into the guest room and get the dreidels from my bag on the bed. I brought all of my collection, so pick your favorites.”

The two practically get stars in their eyes and run off to go retrieve the tops. Taako turns back to his pan.

“Spit it out, what’s up with you?” He doesn’t phrase it as a question.

“…I don’t wanna talk about it,” Jo says.

“Is it ‘cause your parents aren’t here?” Taako asks, and his voice gets softer. He glances over in time to see Jo nod silently.

He sighs. At this age, Jo won’t be distracted from stuff with games and food, they actually think broadly. Fuck, Angus is their age and look at all the thinking he does! …Point is, Taako should’ve expected this.

“Listen,” he says, unable to have a formal heart to heart due to having to keep an eye on the food. “I know it sucks, I want ‘em here too. You think I’m happy spending a Channukah night without my twin sister? No way.”

“Then why are you acting like this?” Jo asks, looking impatient. “Don’t just pretend they aren’t here!”

“I’m not pretending, I’m distracting. Look, your siblings would whine and cry if I acted like you are right now. Do you want them to cry?”

“…No.”

“No, ‘cause I don’t wanna deal with the headache that’d give me,” Taako jokes, but Jo doesn’t smile. Taako sighs, moves the pan off the heat, and leans on the island across from them.

“I get that you're sad and I’m not telling you to not miss them, I get it. But we’ll see them tomorrow, and we can all spend the last night together.”

“But… I just miss them,” Jo says, and they’re pouting a little.

“I know kid, me too,” Taako says, “But! That’s the point of me being all upbeat and shit— don’t say that word.”

“I won’t.”

“Good. See, your parents would be mad or sad or whatever if they think you didn’t have any fun. All they want is for you to enjoy the holiday. Like, they’re probably having tons of fun at your grandma’s.”

(Lup and Barry are probably cuddled up on a loveseat and telling stories of the kids to Marlena; fun for them, but Taako would’ve fallen asleep five minutes in.)

Jo still doesn’t look totally convinced. Time to break out the big guns.

Taako leans in as close as he can while his feet are still touching the ground. “You wanna know the secrets to cheating at dreidel?”

Jo looks up at him. “You can cheat?”

“Oh yeah,” Taako says with a smirk. “She doesn’t do it with you kids, but your mom is the queen at cheating at that game. She would walk away from the table with her arms full of gelt.”

Jo looks delighted. Lup never lets her chaotic side show in front of the kids, so Taako’s stories about it are guaranteed to be attention grabbers.

“I can show you how she does it, if you want.”

“Yes,” Jo says, leaning in with their hands on the table. They may be adopted, but that wicked grin on their face just screams Lup.

“But you gotta promise that it doesn’t leave this kitchen, got it?” Taako asks. They can’t have the other two learning about it and they especially can’t have their parents learning he taught them.

“Promise.”

Taako smirks and stands back up to go back to his cooking. “Good.”

Soon they were all gathered around the dining room table with bellies full of latkes and trading gelt back and forth. Taako winks over every cheated spin, and Jo is laughing.

That’s the reaction uncles should be getting. Much better.

[rikumorimachisgirl]

If Izumi and Sakyo are the mom and dad of the Mankai company, what about the others? I wanna know what you think.

Hello, Anon! Now this is the type of ask I wanna get. 😁 I looooove Sakyo and Izumi, and I'm so happy you agree that they're Mankai's dad and mom.

As for the rest of the crew... (Again this is just my opinion, so feel free to agree or agree to disagree):

The babies:

🌻 Muku, Yuki and Azami are the babies, and despite having the same age, their personalities are different from each other - Muku is the baby and the goodest boy, Yuki is sassy, and Azami is borderline emo (I have my dad! I'm a rebel!). Despite their differences (and the fact that Azami is rebelling against Sakyo the way Satan does Lucifer in another game), their parents love them all equally.

🌻 Masumi, Tenma, Taichi, and Kumon are awkward middle children. Like the babies, they're as different as day and night but are generally a good bunch. Masumi is especially attached to his mom, while Tenma is the most mature of the bunch. Taichi is the child they spend the most time trying to understand because he's too afraid to show his true personality. Sakyo and Izumi need to round up as many of their children as possible on a weekly basis to watch Kumon's games. Sakyo and Azami often argue about it, but Azami ends up going (and enjoying himself) anyway. (Also, I have a feeling Azami secretly wants all of his dad Sakyo's attention on him because he sees him as his hero, but that's just me!)

🌻 Sakuya, Banri, Juza are tough older brothers (Banri often thinks Sakuya is adopted though). Banri and Juza act like they don't care, but in reality they're very much aware of what's going on and are first to jump in and protect their sibs and their relatives if trouble arises. These two troublemakers often argue and sometimes it gets physical, so Sakuya always ends up having to intervene and talk some sense into them. He also bribes the little ones with candies and snacks to make sure they don't tell their parents about Banri and Juza's fights.

🌻 Tsuzuru and Kazu are the twins who aren't like twins. They're both very artistic, but that's about all they have in common. Tsuzuru is an introvert who wants quiet spaces so he can write, while Kazu is the party animal. They were once roommates but had to be split up because Kazu was way too noisy for Tsuzuru's taste. (To this day, Kazu is still heartbroken about this, but he doesn't let it show)

🌻 Masumi is a gymnast and a member of the Japan Gymnastics team. He's one of the reasons mom and dad are out a lot because of the demands of his schedule and his competitions.

🌻 Omi is the eldest son, therefore the one who fusses over his siblings most. He spoils each of them, and makes sure the house is in order while dad and mom are out.

The extended family (because you know, we're Asians)

🌻 Sakoda is dad's nephew and boy-Friday. Despite how hard dad is on him, he trusts him with his life and is also the first to protect him.

🌻 Tasuku and Tsumungi are the children's cousins from their mom's side who live with them because their family is based elsewhere and they work in Tokyo.

🌻 Chigasaki and Chikage are the children's cousins from their dad's side who also live with them because they work in Tokyo.

🌻 Homare is mom's older brother, whom she doesn't see living on his own.

🌻 Azuma is dad's younger brother, who is currently in between jobs and is need of a place to crash.

🌻 Citron and Hisoka are foreign exchange students that the family is hosting. (Although I have a feeling they're gonna want to stay long after their program is finished.)

🌻 Matsukawa, Yuzo, and Tetsuro are mom's uncles who often (like 6/7 days) drop by to hang out with the kids along with their pet, Kamamechi.

I hope you enjoy this, as much as I had fun thinking this up. 💕

[fairymadnessyeah]

BNHA Ship to Finish the Year

KotEri (Izumi Kota x Eri Aizawa)

Canon

I like to think that Kota and Eri meet during October. Eri never went trick or treating, and since Kota is a kid her age and Ragdoll is available for taking the door to door, Shota deems it okay.

They met before Halloween night, and it goes okay. Mostly they talk about costumes.

They dress up as LeMillion and Deku. Ragdoll sends a lot of pictures, It's too cute.

From there on out, the two are inseparable. I feel like Kota would be Eri's first friends, and he teaches her the beauty of pranks. Once, they put cooking oil on the floor and watched as Iida went flying into the TV. There is a no running rule now.

I don't think they would go to school together until they go to UA. 

I feel like until then Kota only sees her as a friend until they start high school. Suddenly, the guys of class 1a are talking about who the cutest girl and they all think it's Eri.

He knows he shouldn't, but he is mad about it... Oh no!

I feel that for Eri, it happens later and more slowly. She knows she can trust Kota. Whenever she has a problem or needs someone to talk to, she knows she can trust in him.

By the second year, when I imagine he suddenly hits a growth spurt and enters his emo phase, she realizes he is handsome. 

The two don't say anything until they go to a hero-convention (Deku Merch!) and one of the ex-Hassaikai attacks as a villain and recognizes Eri.

Kota helps her by taking her around the city, and when they get to a Sakura tree, Eri leans in and kisses him. He obviously returns it, and they start dating.

They keep it a secret for as long as they can, since Aizawa is the principal and very protective of his daughter. However, once he finds out, his trust in Kota is completely broken. He is not welcome in their home anymore.

However, Shinsou is weaker against Eri's puppy eyes.

I don't know why, but I would love a fic about them like this:

"Hey Izu-kun, you know how to drive right? And your aunt's and uncle let you take their car whenever?"

"Yeah, why?" "I need you to drive me somewhere?" "Sure, where?" "Tartarous," "... alright."

"So, why am I driving you to Tartarous?" "Oh, I want to talk with Chisaki," "*stops abruptly* WHAT!? You want to talk with the man that tortured you since you can remember and made your life a living hell!? WHY!?!?"

"I need closure. I know I might never be able to forget him and what he did, but I can't freeze every time somebody mentions him. I need to do this, I need to move on,"

He goes with her, as moral support. It kind of helps seeing him armless, behind bars and defeated, but Eri simply tells him she is moving on with her life and he should too.

After it, they go for ice-cream and a walk in the beach (I like to think this is a favourite date for them). I think it's a very romantic moment until Shinsou interrupt them.

Her family was made aware that she visited Chisaki and have been looking for her like crazy.

Family

Aizawa is not happy when he finds out. This is what happens:

*Eri comes in with Kota. The two have smoothies, Kota a blue one and Eri a red one* "Hi dad! We are going to be in my room studying! Don't interrupt us!" "Alright!"

*An hour later* "Eri, Mic is going to be home in a few minutes, we'll have dinner when he arrives. Is Kota staying?" "No, his aunt is picking him up in a bit," "...Why is your tongue purple?" "Oh... um... maybe it was the smoothie," "You had a red smoothie... and Kota had a blue... one..." 

*He realizes what happened and starts stomping up the stair, Eri behind him, telling him to calm down. He slams the door open and sees Kota, with his hair messed and his lips covered in lip gloss, throwing himself off the window.* "Come here, you traitor!"

Aizawa calls a family meeting, and even Shinsou who has his own home has to come. He is ready to expel him, he feels betrayed. He trusted that kid in his home, and he takes advantage of his daughter? I don't think so! He is going to die.

Hizashi cries, his baby girl is replacing him. (I headcanon that she would die her hair to look like a rainbow, and Kota helps her, instead of Hizashi)

Shinsou is the one who sides with Eri, reminding his parents that she is old enough to make a decision like this, and they should trust her. "Besides, I was her age when Kaminari and I started doing stuff," "What?" "What?" "I don't live here anymore, I don't have to keep secrets,"

Shinsou lets her come to his home to get ready for her dates, so that Koda doesn't have to fear for his life in their living room. However, he still threatens him.

"For some reason, you make Eri happy. But if that changes, and you make her sad, you are going to wish, Midoriya never saved you from Muscular," "H-how do you know that?" "I know everything. Have fun on your date!"

The WWP are embarrassing. They have a photo album ready, they tell Eri how much he talks about her.

They also have an open-door policy, but Koda is a rebel and doesn't follow the rule. However, they found a way around it.

*comes in without knocking* "Hey kiddos, want some cookies?" "No, Aunt. We are fine," "Alright, just keep the door open!"

*comes in without knocking* "Hey lovebirds, are you thirsty? I made some lemonade!" "We are fine, Pixie-bob," "Alright, just keep the door open!"

*comes in without knocking* "Have you seen the cat?" "We don't have a cat, Ragdoll!" "Oh, right! Keep the door open!"

But when he locks the door:

*BANG!* "Aaaaahhhh!" "Aaaaaaaahhhhhhh!" "Tiger! Did you just kick the door open!?" "Yes! Remember to keep the door open!"

Also, when they found out, the WWD follows them on their date. They need pictures.

The problem is that Kota and Eri are not on a date. They are helping Katsumo give a tour of the city to his sister. They all notice the four pros following them, Kota tells them to ignore them.

I feel like Deku would be happy for them. His first fans are so cute together. 

AU - Band AU

This is a modern setting au.

So, Eri was adopted into music. After she was rescued from Chisaki, she was adopted by Present Mic and his husband, Aizawa.

Present Mic is a famous radio host, and before that, he and Aizawa and Oboro played in a band together. Now, Aizawa is a music manager for young artist, in between those there is 1A band.

As she grows up, she is introduced to music, and it becomes one of the best things in her life. She is a great singer, and she also learns how to play the piano.

She want to have a career in music, so when she is a teen, at UA school, she joins the music club.

She is trying to form a band, and along the way she finds Katsuma, who becomes the bassist, Tamashiro on the drums, and they only need a guitarist and vocalist.

Enter Bad boy Kota. His parents were musicians that died in a boat accident, and so Kota now lives his aunt and their dancing group, The Wild Wild Pussycats.

He used to love music, but now it's only a reminder of who he lost.

But one day, Eri hears him sing. She asks if he would want to join their band. He refuses and leaves, but that is not the last he sees of Eri.

The two are paired for some school work, and while working on it, Eri starts singing, and it wakes something in him.

Kota doesn't know what it was, but suddenly, he felt as if he was with his parents again.

He tells her that he'll join her band temporarily, at least so he has enough time to figure out what was that feeling.

They are all ecstatic, and they start playing together.

Eri and Kota are the ones who most clash since he is really into rock and edgy stuff, and she is more cute and pop style.

However, the two spend a lot of time together.

Kota wants to understand how Eri makes him feel stuff, and Eri doesn't really mind his company, so she lets him stay. She was always very shy, so it's hard for her to make friends without recurring to music.

At some point, Eri tells Kota about her life as Chisaki's toy, and it makes him realize why Eri is so special.

She is real, she suffered and survived, and now she can keep smiling. Which Kota never got to, he never moved on from his parents death, and still hold on to the rage and sadness.

Kota also opens up to Eri, and he tells her about his parents death and his departure from music.

Eri asks him to sing with her, and when they do, Kota feels like he has his parents back. It brings him to tears, but Eri hold him.

The band present themselves to the talent show of the school and somehow end up winning. 

During the celebration party, Kota and Eri kiss.

Fanon Opinion

I'm sorry, but I don't feel comfortable writing NSFW stuff about Kota or Eri.

I know that I age up everybody, and I did so with these two, too, but I can't.

I can't picture them as nothing, but children and I am not going to write PWP about that. 

I don't they would do it until their third year, but I do think that they make out.

I think this is a very cute couple. They have that puppy-love thing going for them. 

Also, I love this because it would be a good thing for Eri. We just want good things for Eri.

And I know that Eri is older than Kota, and supposedly she should be his senpai. But with all the emotional baggage she has, I think it makes sense that she would start school a little later.

I think that they would be a beach and parks couple. In summer, they go to the beach, while in the winter they hang around the park.

I feel like they would love to go camping.

Also, they match. They are horn buddies.

Also, Tik-Tok has a lot of stuff about them, so I recommend seeing them. I got the Band AU idea from it.

I imagine that they would become heroes when they are older. Eri would be like a new recovery girl, but scarier, and Kota would torture the children when they go to the training camp.

In my mind, Eri uses Aizawa's capture weapon, but she has it wrapped around her arms, covering her scars.

Also, while they are at the dorms, they are the Parent Couple. The two take care of their classmates with Kota stopping them from doing stupid shit and lecturing them, and Eri comforting them and healing their bruises.

Also, if Katsuma goes with them to class, he would be the baby.

"Oh, No! This is Bad! This is Bad! Stress is bad for the baby!"

"What baby?"

"ME! I'm the baby!"