#we love mixing it up tho u kno

[rebouks]

Wyatt: I could’ve had a bath at home. Brynn: Tch, is not the same. Gael: I was beginning to think you weren’t coming back. [Brynn rolled her eyes, gesturing over her shoulder] Brynn: This is Wy-… Wyatt: Kaito. Brynn: [hums] Kaito, meet Gael.

Gael: Did you have fun mountaineering with my better half all day? Brynn: [scoffs] Gael, please-.. this is my friend, not yours. [Gael huffed, twiddling with the drawstrings on his trunks uncomfortably] Gael: So, what do you do? Wyatt: You already know. Gael: I do? Wyatt: I’m a waiter? Gael: Oh, right-.. is that it? Wyatt: That’s it.

After exchanging a few painful pleasantries, Wyatt zoned out. Gael had launched into a wearisome soliloquy about his career and various other achievements, none of which were particularly interesting or impressive. Brynn wasn’t listening either, her eyes glazing over as he wittered to himself. He’d address her occasionally, growing more and more desperate for attention each time his prompts to involve her fell flat. Intent on dropping hints about how wealthy and important he was, Gael’s one-sided conversation should’ve been deliciously interesting to pick apart, but Wyatt was too tired and hungry to think straight. He briefly wondered who Gael was trying to impress; Brynn, Wyatt or himself? His gut told him it was the latter, though he wasn’t sure why-.. he needed a full stomach and a warm bed.

Wyatt: I’d love to stay and be chatted at, but I have better things to do. [Brynn swallowed a snicker as Gael balked, halting mid-sentence] Brynn: I see you soon. Wyatt: I’m sure you will…

Gael: Well, that was rude. Brynn: You are rude, and embarrassing. Gael: Embarrassing?! Brynn: Why you think a stranger in another country gives a shit about you and your boring work is beyond my brain. [Gael sighed, trying not to feel too offended; Brynn was just tired…]

Previous // Next

[getranched]

coulddddd we have a rundown of the habitants of the ranch?

Well I'm not sure about every single being who makes this (cosmic nightmare) house a home

But I'm sure we can give you a good rundown!(also PSA this account does deal with unreality so if that kind of thing messes with you be careful)

First up is the Ranch itself! A mimic in its final stage of life! They normally become dungeons or haunted houses but this lovely guy had the (mis)fortune to become a familiar with Moon in around the 1700's I'm pretty sure. And as a fully adult mimic it spawns thousands of baby mimics which end up replacing our furniture and the like.

EREN INTERJECTION i’m eren, OR RIJU, a shapeshifter. i just live here idk. i have a friend who’s a burmese python but he doenst live here. uhmm yeah idk i just eat the food in the fridge and sometimes i’ll throw bits of my fresh kills in there too. idk uhmm yeah im friends w everyone here except for like. FD maybe?? but he doesnt live here i dont think….

tbh i dont really keep up with who comes in and who doesnt HAHA im usually in my room playing with bones or reading when im here at the ranch

Twi interjection! I'm Twilight (or just Marth) i'm just kind of here, and if i'm not, i'm tending to my acnh island Tabantha. (Also this account is being shared between 15 or less people, some are more active than others and their individual accounts are being followed by this one)

Is it really an interjection if everybody’s doing it when nobody else is typing? Who knows! I’m Vivian, local semi-moth humanoid and god/dess of the Lost and the Traveling on occasion. Unlike most local chumps deities, I am a multiversal being, which means I am THE deus ex machina in any given situation, and like to Borrow from other universes. cough cough: ner beskar’gam. Also, I have a sapient AI living in “my” spaceship (which is legally his, don’t tell xem), just for funsies

This is Sky now. I'm not really supposed to be in this galaxy, I crash landed in the front yard on one of my spaceships. I tried apologizing to the landlord but we ended up throwing hands, not my fault. Eventually I stayed at the Ranch tho. Hobbies: leading prison breaks, motorcycle rides, eating lightbulbs for the sake of trolling, antagonizing gods, blasting my friends into space. Ended up adopting a demon cat guy. (Vivian note: this is not the catboy incubus. This is a different demon cat guy) (Sky note: Yeah, my boy is the cat butler, the other catboy is a pain in my ass) (Vivian again: and a pleasure in mine)

This is Luna! I am the goddess of horses and all things related. I spend most of my time as a horse (sometimes a centaur) AND I AM NOT A CHUMP VIVI! anyway I used to run an empire ages ago before it was destroyed, and I got sealed away. I have Twi to thank for breaking my seal! Nowadays I'm restarting my cult (its horse girls mostly rn) and fixing horse races. If you ever see a horse say hello it might be me.

Heyo! I'm saria, local milf. I have deer antlers because some grass god decided it'd be cool to mix the local humans with deer. (to be fair, he was right.) I'm mostly human, though. I stream bloodborne because that game reminds me of my found family and my village. I'm still piecing together what happened to my people, but for now I bake, garden, and play my silly little video game. catch me having tea with a succubus and a doll on tuesdays and shopping with a horse on thursdays.

Hi! I'm Wild! I was Moons first kid after my dog and I accidently ended up in this world, escaped jail, and hid in her man eating garden. Most of the time, I sail the seas of my home world and have the best adventures with the greatest pirate crew u could ever imagine. But, I do come visit home from time to time, too, thanks to my crystal that lets me travel through time and space. Somebody's gotta bedazzle FD's tools and give Moon a headache, ya kno?

Yormp here! I’m not totally sure who I am, I’m working on it. Moon says I’m a creature of my own choice, but I’m not too sure about that. Before I was an omen of war, and my friends called themselves pestilence, conquest, and death. Then I died, some time passed, I don’t remember it all, got cursed to be an otter for a bit, and met Moon. Now? I’m just going to college. Learning a little. If I really do get to choose, I think I’ll choose not to be War reborn this time.

Oh… and uhh. Goose.

Hmmm? OH it's my turn! Hey hey hey! I am (the) Sun Sun Sun and when you're with me everything is fun fun fun!. I'm Moon's counter part. We share a body, we share a mind, we are the same person, but not quite! Much like Moon I am also a clown, but instead of resembling a porcelain doll I have the body of a goat (sorta)! You can think of me as Moon's opposite! We may not agree on much, but we do hold our family very dear to us! I'm also referred to as a father and much like Moon, I don't mind what I'm called! Speaking of Moon, she wants her turn to speak now!

Hello, dearest traveler,

It seems you have found our home. I'm (the) Moon. I am the one that eats many gods in this world. But do not worry, it is strictly business. As of this moment, I have taken the form of a porcelain clown. This body was provided to me by a dear friend. I am also referred to as the father of many Ranch residents. Though I am called a father, and might be referred to as Mr. Vilon, I do not care much for what I am referred to as. Most use she/her.

[Psst. Moon. Don't forget to tell them some house rules!]

Ah yes... While you are here traveler, be sure keep some things in mind:

- Mind your teeth and your belongings, else they might be stolen

- Remember to keep your feet off the grass. The plants get hungry after a certain time.

- Not everything is what it seems. I'm sure you will become familiar with our mimics both big and small.

- Do not assume a door, hallway, or stairwell will take you to the same place twice.

- The void will always listen to your troubles.

- Do not pet the cats. Some are... not the kind that you want the attention of. Or maybe they are. That's up to you.

- And most importantly, remember, that sometimes, it is better to stay lost than to be found.

Enjoy your visit,

The Vilons

[actualbird]

rambles about relatively old tot promo materials because the early stuff is a treasure trove of fun

wc: 796

artem wing: HUH? HIS PAST????

introductory character profile. posted on the official tot website on April 19, 2021

okay so everything in here tracks and im not surprised about that EXCEPT FOR the last line in here "No one can even begin to imagine the kind of past he bears..." THAT has me tilting my head cuz

artem (followed in second place by marius, imo) has the least Dark/Mysterious Backstory. i love artem to bits but his backstory thus far is Lonely Childhood And Vague Emotional Neglect + Neil Disappearance. WHICH IS IMPORTANT AND EMOTIONALLY DRIVING FOR ARTEM AS A CHARACTER, MAKE NO MISTAKE. but the way that last line is worded makes it sound VERY DRAMATIC. while i was waiting for the game's release and i read this way back when i was like oooOOOOOHHH WHAT JUICY BACKSTORY DEETS IS ARTEM HIDING

loneliness, is the answer so far

tho i my interest will be Thoroughly Piqued if theres gonna be more to come, especially with neil cuz thats the juiciest bit of his backstory rn. until then, im like hUH?? cuz like, not even vyn or luke's character profile had This Much Drama irt to backstory. luke's doesnt even MENTION anything alluding to backstory.

hyv, unleash the forbidden artem past, if any. i will EAT IT UP

-

marius von hagen: where did you get these statistics, sir?

part of the Special Riddle series. posted on official tot twitter on July 21, 2021

WHAT IS GOING ON WITH THAT PERSONALITY TEST RESULT KJSBFKJAKSFJA. i kno the percentages are to allude to the riddle's answer (context: this pic was part of a series of riddle images that teased things like character pv release and global release date) but also omg

first off: mARIUS VON HAGEN WITH 0% YEARNING?? I MUST LAUGH. this is the dude who became a sad whiny kitten after mc didnt text him for a few hours. his yearning is 100%

second off: what kind of personality test measures Cuteness, Mischief, Yearning, Keenness, and [REDACTED]? this is a fascinating set of traits to measure, idc about the MBTI anymore i wanna take the test for CMYK?

for my personal entertainment purposes, i assume he got these results from a uquiz where he had to pick thru song lyrics

-

vyn richter: look at him

part of the Rule Of Stellis' Law series. posted on official tot twitter on July 12, 2021

i dont actually have anything to say here i just think he looks adorable hes literally like

-u-

so i want u to look at him

-

luke pearce: dude, what kind of cases do u take????

introductory...location/business descriptions? posted on tot official twitter on April 25, 2021

"The clients who visit and the cases that they bring can be a little...out there" omg what does that Mean

actually wracking my brain for cases luke takes thru his PI agency makes me realize, huh, we actually havent seen much of them so far. it's only

Penny's Comfort Food case from main story 1

case that needed him to go undercover at a gala to collect info from SSR Alluring Gaze

case that needed him to Look For A Thing in SR Inner Sanctum

misc cases we didnt get much deets about that he solved in the span of MIXING A SINGLE DRINK back when he was a bartender, mentioned in SR Star in The Palm

(at first i thought, oh theres also SSR Perfect Partner! but then i remembered that wasnt officially a case brought to him that was just him and mc being a little nosy cuz they believe in LOVE which is v sweet but out of the scope of this list kBKSJFKFBKSDJ)

none of these strike as particularly Out There so i can only speculate that outside of card stories and personal stories, luke is going on cases that are Truly Bizarre cuz hes an overachiever and very (granted, rightfully) proud of his skill as an investigator. like a robbery and the only piece of evidence is an apple peel, or an odd case of identity fraud that involves many coincedences, or the class tortoise has been kidnapped, detective pearce, YOU HAVE TO FIND SHELLY!!!!! luke ends up taking a call from mc one day when hes on a case and hes like

luke: yooo!

mc: hey! just wanted to ask if youre free on---whats with that echo on your end?

luke: oh, im in an air vent right now

mc: WH. WHY

luke: case, you know how it is

mc, realizing she doesnt actually know what most of his cases are: I DONT, ACTUALLY?

luke: kidnapped tortoise

mc: that....brings up more questions, not less

[bylertruther]

17, 37, 48 ❣️ (biting you tho.)

seventeen. do you think will is going to have powers?

going to have?! he already has them and i hope that when the upside down swallows hawkins whole that it makes them even stronger and gives him back his electricity manipulation or whatever the hell it was that made him able to contact joyce from the upside down<3 i need tht true sight dialed up to 100%. i also think it'd be supremely sexy if he mastered the art of spying and was able to fight back like tht. or if he became like a walking radar and used his "now memories" to be able to pinpoint where things are exactly and thus was directly in the monster fighting mix bc of it. smth smth abt taking this reminder of his trauma and using it to fight back, taking control of it instead of letting it take control of him. i also think it'd be cool if he used vecna's tricks against him. if maybe the puppet can become the puppet master or smth. maybe even use vecna's power to release the demo-creatures from their possession, leaving the general without his soldiers. but it'd only go tht far bc will would never make another creature do something they don't want to do. it'd jus be to kill tht clown, u kno? no more than tht.

thirty seven. if byler is something you believe thats going to happen, how do you think they’ll handle it?

oh my goshhhhhh do Not ask me this. i don't even want to think abt it bc i don't want to get my hopes up. i am a byler truther through and through but i am also a very cute and fluffy scared hamster. my hope in general is already killing me i won't survive if i add any byler hope to the mix bdjhsbf. 😭 BUT REGARDLESS... i know tht will is going to cry. and tht noah is going to steal the scene srry bt it's tru. it's going to happen and their gay love for each other will literally actually save the world and each other. i just don't know how.

forty eight. do you think hopper would be a good father to jonathan and will if he comes back and him and joyce get together?

i think so. he's had a lot of time to reflect on himself, his trauma, and his actions. if that sticks, then i have no doubt that he would be a good father. he and will have saved each others lives countless of times. hopper especially has put himself in danger multiple times for will. i remember that he accompanied them to his appointments with dr owens, too. hopper clearly cares about the byers and wants them all to be safe and feel safe. the only thing that would give me pause is if his short temper reemerged. i don't think that will and jonathan would react well to the aggression we've seen him display in previous seasons—even with all the good he's done their family, i'm sure it'd remind them too much of lonnie. "if you're raised with an angry man in your house, there will always be an angry man in your house." :/ but we know that he cares about them. we know that he is capable of being sweet once he's let his guard down. we know that he feels things. jonathan and will are both sensitive, he'd have to adjust to that i think, but we've seen him do it with them before. will would probably be more receptive to hopper considering everything he's done for him, and jonathan would probably take more time to adjust to having another man in the house and no longer having to don the patriarchal role, but he would get there, too. he wants his family to be happy and safe, and them all having someone to support them would give him the space to live his own life, too. so long story short !!!!! yes, i do think hopper would be a good father now that he's come out of his cave again and stepped into the light. :)

[guu]

Got tagged by Julia @wuggen in this big ol Answer These Questions chain letter thingimajig. Supposed to tag 25 people (wowie this one feels like it was taken straight from the old myspace ones)

Last...

Beverage: Full Thottle bc energy drinks have me in a chokehold to function

Phone call: uhhh either a doordash customer or my bff gabs

Text message: talkin with my mom abt her surgery tomorrow

Song you listened to: idk man i’m on a vaporwave mix rn

Time you cried: i don’t cry much anymore so uhhh... maybe... a month ago?

Have you ever...

Dated someone twice: yeah ;;- _-)

Kissed someone and regretted it: when i was 16 yeah

Lost someone special: In the sense of fucked up a good relationship: yes

in the sense of losing contact: soo many

in the sense of death: my grandma

Been depressed: bro since i was 11

Been drunk and threw up: oh yeah. hasn’t happened in years tho

Last year, have you...

Made a new friend: Ya!

Fallen out of love: Nope

Laughed until you cried: I don’t think so but mb. memory shit.

Found out who your true friends are: I mean, I guess. too bad none of them are here irl.

Found out someone was talking about you: No bc I’m 30

General

How many people on your fb friends list do you know in real life?: I only have ppl added i kno irl bc i never use fb.

List 3 favorite colors: This hasn’t changed in like 15 yrs

pink, green, black

Firsts

First surgery: Still none

First piercing: I got my ear pierced at Claire’s when I was like. 6. so yeah that got infected Fast.

First best friend: I never had a true best friend till 7th grade, so my first is still my best friend in the whole world, Gabs.

First sport you joined: I was on the tennis team in middle school

First vacation: My family has never been rich. soo.

The time they took us along to Dodge City for a motorcycle rally back when they were bikers. that was fun. there was blood outside one of the rooms at the Best Western and i got a harmonica there.

First pair of trainers: Yeah I’m with Julia wth does this mean, I wouldn’t have guessed shoes if she didn’t say so. Licherally don’t remeber

Right now

Eating: Nothing atm, might break into some kettle corn soon

Drinking: Still the. Full Throttle.

I’m about to: get some more work done on Jewel Thieves and prolly go back out and play more Tales of Symphonia

Your future

Want kids: Got two, don’t want more.

Get married:Man i don’t know and i don’t care. if i do get married to anyone it’ll be for like, marriage benefits?

Career: I want a show of one my comics. But anyway as for ‘career’, character designer seems to be my best shot with what i Want to Do.

Which is better

Lips or eyes: yeah i think this is rly where u can see teens made these old things. both are good? people all definitely have both.

Hugs or kisses: i am so starved for friend hugs.

Shorter or taller: I don’t actually care much, it’s hard to be shorter than me, but taller is ideal cause then they could get stuff off high shelves and i go low and in small places. ideal dynamics.

Older or younger: As long as they’re old enough to drink, either is chill. probably older tho. Or a few yrs younger.

Romantic or spontaneous: Can we not have both????? What's the distinction here??? (leaving ur answer Julia cause I agree)

Nice stomach or nice arms: Big tummy... but i am a slut for a man with big strong arms

Sensitive or loud: I feel like these are not mutually exclusive? I’m sensitive and loud about it. (well. some of us are. i don’t feel much strongly)

Hook-up or relationship: Meh, either. I’m not the best with hook-ups but I might go for one if presented it.

Trouble maker or hesitant: Troublemaker within reason. I need someone who can make decisions for me so hesitant is a bit...

Have you ever...

Kissed a stranger: Yeah

Drank hard liquor: Yeah but I can’t do it anymore. Gives me heartburn.

Lost glasses/contacts: Used to lose or break my glasses all the time.

Sex on first date: Yea

Broke someone’s heart: Unfortunately u_u

Been arrested: I’ve been in handcuffs but that’s it.

Turned someone down: Hmm... yeah actually I think. I usually give just abt anyone a shot but there was that weird brony guy who was a huge misogynist.

Cried when someone died: Sorta. I didn’t know how to feel when gradma or grandpa died but I cried for my mom when they both passed.

Oh and I guess after the initial celebration of “the dead one”‘s passing, and realizing him being gone didn’t help how I felt I cried.

Do you believe in...

Yourself: Considering I’ve been let down so much I’d often have to say “if ya want somethin’ done right-” yeah

Miracles: No, but I want to.

Love at first sight: Used to. Romance is weird for us these days.

Heaven: No

Santa Claus: Okay uh, bro????

Kiss on the first date: Yeah man just go for it if it’s right for the both of ya.

Angels: Ok I know I said i don’t believe in heaven (or hell) but I’m on the fence with angels.

ok im not tagging 25 but let’s see. (as usual, only do if ya wanna ofc!)

@chocolatechippi , @babylonbirdmeat , @lilstinky , @goodvibesdog , @mood2you , @nonbinaryjew , @e-102 , @cringezskull430 , @snailbutch ,

@minmos , @3000s , @sablesablesablesable

[coomerclones]

hi hello i am legitimately here asking you to do all of them. please and thank you. or whichever ones interest you, at least!!! (for the hlvrai ask meme)

DNBDKHBSVKH u kno what. i will thank u that'll definitely help me pass time LOL puttin it under a readmore;

How’d you find out about HLVRAI? > so i definitely saw it all over my dash when it first came out, but i didn't know anything about haIf life so i just kinda ignored it, i didn't really think abt it at all bc i was like 'oh this is hl related and ive never played that, so' but at some point my brother watched it on the suggestion of a pal (he knew more about hl than i did, but also not v much) and then made me watch it bc he thought i'd like it. then we watched it two more times afterwards w different sibs and during the third watch i really felt the fixation Activate in my brain LOL

Who’s your favorite character and why? > a hard question... i love them all v much. the first place is like a threeway tie between gordon tommy and coomer that kinda changes around - ultimately it's probably gordon, but tommy and coomer are so close behind him that it's hard to really say lol though coomer was my fav during the first watch, and tommy was my fav during the next two!

Who do you relate to most in the series? > gordon maybe kbdfjhb

What font do you use most? > the font i use the most PURPOSELY is heffaklump. this is because it is the n/eopets font

Favorite Scene? > i have no idea how im supposed to pick this when there are SO many good ones tbh like several came to mind oooaaa

Favorite Act? > probably.... hm.. the final ?? maybe even act 1 actually. idk they're all good for their own reasons

Favorite Line? > when i first watched it my fav was probably the whole coomer 'gordon, look out! hotted boobs up ahead! tits big ones' + 'gordon, titty boob huge fuck' but now... hm... god.. idk there are so many like good little lines ive come to appreciate very much kjjngjhbfvdf it's hard to pick One

Favorite Beverage? > my fav beverage that i have Commonly is a nice can of barqs root beer, my fav beverage that i only have on rare occassions tho is cola champagne! it's sooo good

Favorite Song (PASSPORT GUARDIAN, Dr.Coomer’s Bumpin Mix)? > AH ok i love passport guardian but it might be dr coomers bumpin mix, that gets in my head a lot kjfnjhbdf

Do you have a favorite headcanon or trope about any of the characters? > they're all neurodivergent and lgbt+ <3

Have you watched any other series similar to HLVRAI (Gorgeous Freeman, Freeman’s mind)? > no and i'm not rly interested in doing so

Do you drink soda? > hell yea

Do you think aliens exist? > hell yea

What toppings do you like on your pizza? > i usually like having a couple toppings at a time and it ranges depending on what i'm in the mood for ig? typically i go for like bacon or sausage or chicken or pepperoni, maybe some olives etc

What weapon would you use in a alien invasion? > idk kfjnjhdb i dont see myself as super likely to be doing anything besides hiding somewhere + crying but probably just whatever i could get my hands on rly lol probably smth generic if im picking a hl weapon tho im either going classic crowbar or hivehand (tho putting my hand into the hivehand sounds atrocious)

If you could be in any video game, which one would you be in? > if it counts im picking n/eopets. if it doesnt count im picking n/eopets the darkest faerie for ps2 if that ALSO doesnt count for some reason... idk probably just animal crossing lol, a nice peaceful existence

If you could memorize any wikipedia page by heart, which one? > the n/eopets wikipedia page would b really funny bc absolutely no one needs to hear me recite that

What’s your favorite video game right now? > currently ive been watching my brother play n/eopets the darkest faerie so im being reminded how much i love that game, so it's that i'm not actively playing anything besides Actual N/eopets right now so ;w;

Have you played any of the Half Life games? > yeah though not til after h/lvrai, and i only just played hl2 in january ! i still have to play the hl2 episodes, but other than that i did finish hl1, blue shift, opposing force, and hl 2 !

Do you watch any of the gang (Wayne, Holly, Gir,etc)? > i mostly watch wayne and scorpy and the occassional baaulp stream - i used to watch a lot more baaulp when i was waking up earlier. i'd never Knowingly heard of any of them until h/lvrai tho !

If they make a second one, what is one thing you want to happen in it? > i hope they drinka nice refreshing soda (my way of saying idk! i dont want anything specific to happen, i'd just be excited to be along for the ride :) !)

What do you think is inside G-man’s suitcase? > some sort of void ig? i dont rly think about it a lot kffjknf

Is Chuck E. Cheese a restaurant or a entertainment center? > ¡ENTERTAINMENT CENTER!

THERE! finished... this successfully passed time and made me sleepy (exactly what i wanted) so thank u so much for asking me to answer them all LOL if anyone read all this ur a hero in my heart.. have a wonderful day

[lasquadrasfuckhouse]

Oohh I loved ur gender hcs!! Mine are kinda similar:

Risotto: Non-binary babe with the big bust here, uses he/they. Never brings it up so no one knows until he marches down the stairs in a skirt and big stompy heels instead of his pants one day.

Prosciutto: Trans man! I think it was over on tenthgrove I saw it, but the hc of him being trans early in his life, and using his resources to transition before he joined Passione really stuck with me

Sorbet: He gives me agender vibes, for some reason. He seems like the type to say "having a gender? In this economy?" I also feel like he doesn't really care about pronouns, whichever ones people apply to him he'll roll with.

Gelato: Agender, but in an entirely opposite flavour. This is the man who lives by the code "Be gay, do crime" do u really think he's gonna just Have a gender??? People tend to assume he's genderfluid, but he's just spontaneous and likes confusing people. Just about any pronouns go with this human tornado

Pesci: b..baby gay. I hc that Pesci didn't really think about gender stuff bc Prosciutto never pressured him, so he just didn't have a reason to! Then he sees Sorbet and Gelato painting nails and goes 'hm.' And melone puts makeup on his face for the first time and he goes '!!!!' Upside? He's now thinking about it. Downside? He has No Clue what he's doing pls help how do gender- he/him(for now???)

Melone: I see him and I instantly think genderfluid. Who the fucks knows what the gender du jour is, he certainly doesn't! Rolls out of bed and doesn't even think about it until he gets asked by someone trying to be polite and his brain short circuits for a hot sec while he figured out an answer

Ghiaccio: Trans man trans man trans man- ahem. I have a small backstory regarding him but maybe another time. Bring up his height and he will freeze your kneecaps, and if u see him wearing a dress no u don't. Will start preening like a peacock if u compliment him on it tho. He/him

Illuso: Another non-binary babe, but the kind that makes sure their hair is Always poppin. They/he. Maggi once made a joke about Lulu's pronouns being hee/hee and got trapped in the Mirror realm until he apologized

Formaggio: okay so this may be controversial, but I hc Maggi as cis *but* that stops him from absolutely nothing, he once got into a Disney dress on a drunk dare but got stuck once it was on and was too sloshed to think about using his stand. He/him

-✨ anon

THESE ARE ALL GOLDEN

sorbet's is so spot on for me im losing my mind. tbh im also thinking about genderfluid melone now and that just makes..... so much sense. melone and binary gender just do not mix. i want u to kno i was telling my roommate about this and they said 'if asked what his gender is he'd be like 'whatever u want it to be honey ;)'' and that's just TOO REAL

it's ok i also hc formaggio as the token cis FJFKDNFJGJF but he's definitely one of those cis dudes who's like, extremely macho man supportive of his trans friends and DEFINITELY unashamed of stuff like wearing dresses, he's like a frat boy being like 'no dude we can't let toxic masculinity take over our brohood bro that's not punk'

ALSO DROP THE GHIACCIO HEADCANON STORY I WANTS IT

[with-the-same-tattoos]

Ok I gotta know; K, L, and Z for Chop Top 👀

N s f t warning

K - Kissing (what parts of their body do they like having kissed? what parts of their partner do they enjoy kissing? do they like leaving marks / having marks left on them?) 

Oh A-L-L. O-V-E-R. On his partner, but especially himself. He's a bit more on the handsy side!!! It's nice, his palms and fingertips are quite harsh and calloused- they really bring out the sensitivities of your body like no other! He does like kisses, but I feel he's definetly the type to start mixing in little nips n bites and graces w teeth... in general he's just the type to give you little zaps and jolts and make you shake in surprise I mean c'mon it's chop top!!!! 🥺 he'll keep u focused on smth and then suddenly get at u from a new direction w a pinch thats him and his goofy lil head.

And yeah essentially just kiss him all over nip & smooch, either very passionately & seriously or all goofy w audible mwah mwah noises and fun and he's putty

Doesn't really mean to leave marks but he's a little careless from time to time....

L - Lighting (are the lights on? off? do they have some kind of mood lighting set up?) 

I had NEVER thought about this BUT god he WOULD have some weird lightshow material would he not.....the caverns in tcm2 are already a mood lit place!!! He is a man of color so... of course !!!! Any light is good, but he would absolutely probs love watching straying lights from old disco light lamps in a dim room flash across his partners skin. Get all glimmery on sweat n such, and them sometimes kinda matching w rhe low music might give him some sensory tingles of just like oh goodness graciouss im in heaven am I not!!! This is all so pretty and there is so much light and color and love here !!!

Tho I also feel like smth nice & slow, outside on a rly hot summer day in a secluded spot would be... weirdly good for him? Like just soft kisses n stuff beyond but that slow roll of sunwaves on his skin and bugs chirring and a suncast halo behind his partners head while they ride him or smth? Again, lads in heaven 🥺 pls brush his hair strands to the side and kiss his forehead

Z - Zones (what are their erogenous zones? what spots on their body should be touched, bitten, kissed, when someone wants to get them in the mood?) 

We kno its the plate and around the plate <33 this is a fact that i am made nervous by bc like... i dont mibd the plate i like it tbg its mad max n dope, but im scared of infection and touchING/KISSING AN INFECTION SENSITIVE AREA??? PLEAAEEEEEE NOOOO

[carpsurprise]

this isn’t really a request but if you want to do it anyway I think it’s fun:^) so we know sunshine boy sam is one of your favorites but can you rate the bachelors and bachelorettes together from most to least favorite and why?

thank u for sending this in!! its always refreshing to do non-imagine/writing stuff for da ol’ noggin!! dlkskd but truly thank u and im gonna put this under a cut and not tag it bc i can foresee there being some issues with this list <3 i do love all of these characters in their own way ofc

1. sam: like u said a given :^) i think sam is dumb and a lot of fun!! i love super happy/caring guys bc i am super bad w/ second guessing myself so!! a guy thats really straight forward and shows how they feel when they feel it is my dream! also the pop punk aesthetic <3 i like that he’s the direct opposite of me!! why would i want to date a dark/brooding guy when im already like that?? i want someone super happy thats gonna radiate that!!

2. haley: haley’s an angel late game! and she’s pretty! im pretty mean myself so i was never driven away from her but was more like damn we’d be powerful together and then she ended up doing a 180 personality wise and i love her even more!! shes so sweet and so helpful during marriage too love her

3. emily: ok emily is like a dream best friend for me!! i love how creative she is and we have a lot of similar interests. she seems like a good mix of the mom girl at a club taking care of all the drunk girls, the girl that u can easily go up to and talk to if u need a partner in class, and the cool older sister. love love love her

4. harvey: sweetheart... angel man. so shy and sweet!! i dont like mean men so him being outright kind and such a good guy is so heartwarming for me!! i feel like he would be respectful at all times and is not a man i’d need to worry about *intentionally* wronging me with intent to hurt <3 

5. elliott: i did theatre in high school and am a creative writing minor. i more wish i was him bc if i could live by the sea and write all day... yes. and speak like someone that would’ve gotten beaten up by a shakespeare character? yes. once again, a man that wouldn’t be mean to me & would make me feel safe

6. maru: also someone i would love as a friend! she’s so kind and always so welcoming my social anxiety would be nonexistent around her <3 i know she’d tell someone my order was wrong for me despite her also being nonconfrontational. seems like a sleepover queen and someone i could go to for anything without being judged love her to death 

7. penny: i also do love penny!! i think she’s def one of the better people in the game what with her aspirations and motivations but!! we r both too shy but i do love reading so i think we would get along there!! she’s v sweet but also her trope is not my fave!! i see a lot of similarities within us 

8. abigail: i do like abigail but i do not see the hype imo. she’s def got more character to her than some of the other women (once again, mr. ape) but she’s just not my type of girl !! i think we’re.... too alike probably. same thing w/ my thing w/ himboish guys.. i try not to surround myself w/ ppl that remind me of myself very often. still lov her tho i promise

9. leah: i feel like leah couldve had more potential in game imo, i dont really think there’s that much to her (thanks mr. ape) but i KNOW she’d beat someone up for me and i love that for both of us. she seems sooo chill and nonjudgemental. she’d buy me food if i couldn’t pay for it at the time </3 i do love her a lot

10. alex: oh boy hot stupid boy but misogynistic comments. granted! high hearts he’s much better but its the getting past that. i like his character at high hearts (also its just funny to headcanon him reacting to other characters) but.. alex i lov u but jesus christ. wouldn’t feel safe around him early game but later on i kno he’d beat up another guy for me <3

11. sebastian: him pushing the farmer (me) away at any chance is a huge turn off for meeeee and i just dont like!! men that are rude. obvi higher hearts hes not anymore but if not for completion sake i wouldnt have gotten to know him. i dont really like edgy guys bc i feel like there’d be more gaslighting and instability. also pelican town only has room for one goth seb stay in the basement </3 sdlkslkd

12. shane: once again mean if i wanted a man to be mean to me i’d walk outside my house. i don’t even reallyyy like his high hearts character (esp w his drinking after marriage) i just lkdlsdk drinking is a big turn off for me (family issues) and i understand why he’s like this i just. it doesn’t excuse it. i’m not his mother i refuse to cater to him bc of his issues. we all have issues.. u cant just treat people bad bc of them!! 

[kinkymagnus]

I have a question and I hope it’s not offensive as I am just genuinely curious, but why does trans magnus always wear panties? I ask because all the trans men I know (my brother, for example and i’m super close to him so most of what I’ve learned of the trans experience has been from him but i’m aware there are different experiences) wear boxer briefs, with my brother in particular I know that was the first change he made when transitioning and was super important to him because wearing underwear targeted at women was a big trigger for his dysphoria. In these fics are we operating under the belief that magnus would be a trans person who doesn’t experience dysphoria? Or do some trans men who do experience dysphoria just not care about underwear because at the end of the day it’s just a piece of material? Again I hope this isn’t rude, i’m just trying to learn different perspectives.

I'm gonna be real bro I just based it off my own experiences which means like. huh flexible dysphoria. some days i want absolutely no tiddies, some days I'm all good. some days i like pretty lacy things some days I'd rather die. sometimes it's a mix. I don't have much bottom dysphoria in general (partially why words like pussy and clit don't bother me, although it's also partially just I don't like the alternative words like "slit"), although it can strike sometimes especially when menstruating, and like, I'd be fine with most of the things I write. (The things I wouldn't do myself aren't gender related, so much as "love reading that kink--wouldnt do it tho" probably bc I don't trust like that lmao)

but in this particular instance i write about it a lot specifically as a sex thing, and part of the reason it IS sexy is bc its like, ah, man in panties ;) it's got that light like humiliation (???)/forbiddenness in addition to just being aesthetically pleasing, and it's kind of almost a rebellion like yes, even a trans man in panties, it's still a Man in panties. like wearing nail polish bc that's not just for girls u kno but it's still genderfucky? and if a guy wears it it has a certain Vibe and it doesn't change if the guys trans, it doesn't mean he's "Reverting Back To Girl" or some shit, and it's the same with dresses and makeup and the panties

personally I don't think he'd necessarily wear them every day under his clothes, but I can see why you'd think that from my blog since I mention it a lot. same with dresses, but that's just bc this is a porn blog, so I'm writing about him having fun sex (and therefore often he may or may not be prepared with pretty panties when normally he may have worn boxer briefs or whatever) and im not really focused so much on talking about dysphoria and serious shit that is kinda depressing, cos this is my fun porn blog, yknow? I talk more about things that make him (or me!) feel good

for the record tho a) gender euphoria. also i feel like while I can't do this cos I'm not like, medically transitioned so I still unfortunately look pretty smol and feminine, but since magnus has got like a full sexy man body, that'd make shit like panties work all the better, bc personally if I looked like that, being able to wear ultra feminine shit and still look like a man, like a man in panties, would be incredibly validating

b) I'd also be totally open to magnus without dysphoria tho! I kno its another target on my back with the "You're actually a girl"/"you're not a real trans" crowd, but like, you don't need dysphoria to be trans, and truscum can suck my dick. and don't leave an unfunny "what dick?" joke in my inbox it's not original

anyway more broadly speaking, personally I wouldn't care too much about more feminine undies unless it was a Bad Day, but I prefer like more "masculine" underwear just because it's more comfortable. panties r great but I don't like wearing them on a daily basis or for long periods of time bc they tend to annoy me. like, itchy lace, or it's a constant ever so slight wedgie--idk maybe I just haven't found the right size yet but I'm fine with my pokemon boxers or whatever so I haven't bothered. I'll still wear them sometimes but only if I'm really in the mood to "feel pretty"

but it could be really important to other people with worse dysphoria, and that is totally valid and makes sense. it's not that it's "just a piece of material" it's just for me personally it doesn't always bother me, and in the case of Magnus, I big time project (plus, I mean. magnus sexy in panties and this is a blog all about magnus being sexy. just sayin)

hope that helps?? I just woke up and typed this on mobile so I hope it's coherent

[equalseleventhirds]

dont apologize i love reading meta!! also i think Fear Soup is very interesting and makes a lot sense (especially bc most of the season 5 statements feature the eye and another Fear) also isn’t it funny that i said what if hell is thinking about being watched and judged by people about what you do haha (i might have sent something close to this but i’m not sure if it sent. might have deleted the tab before it sent sorry if you got two similar rants!)

i just got the one, don’t worry!

and oh anon... oh anon EVERY apocalypse-related statement in s5 (so, not the ones where they talk abt the past instead) has involved AT LEAST four distinct fears, usually more, with arguments easily made for minor appearances of many more. i haven’t done it with every episode and i haven’t properly tagged all the ones i did (i should do that), but if u search my blog for ‘fear soup’ or are willing to wander through my ‘tma spoilers’ tag u will find them. EVERYTHING IS MUSHED TOGETHER

(p much always they have one Main fear and the eye, plus the end is like, an underlying theme in all of them even tho ppl can’t rly die in the apocalypse, and i’m suspecting now that i’ve missed some web stuff where it was before, bcos the ‘you can’t escape’ theme has been so subtle until u look for it. so actually that is four fears, and then they always have at least a couple more so like... at least six fears then? probably? hmmmm. i may have to reanalyze some things. i also am p sure i’ve been missing extinction most of the time bcos i rarely think of it...)

anyway. my POINT. everything is VERY mixed up, and i BELIEVE i’m right. but i’m also p sure the closest tma will come to validating me was in 176 when martin says the domain’s theme doesn’t SOUND like a thing the hunt does, and jon replies: “the old divisions don’t mean as much these days. maybe they never did.” which p much SAYS that the fears aren’t as divided as before, but also we (as in, the characters) are going forward and dividing the domains up by fears, so me being Correct means absolutely nothing story-wise.

i am Further Validated in my heavily related ‘the manifestations of the fears are shaped & defined by People’s Beliefs (and thus, jonah’s ritual worked based on the 14-fear model because at this point so many people follow smirke’s theories, and were in fact attempting rituals based on his writing; and also the domains are ‘claimed’ by a particular entity/avatar bcos of this Belief) by jon going on to say ‘they don’t just feed on the worst fears of the people trapped there; they’re shaped by them, too. it’s enough to fear the domain itself, if not the entire power behind it.’ once again, this isn’t important to PLOT, but it is a facet of worldbuilding that i care DEEPLY about, even if it’s not. u kno. gonna get any use at all.

[wiinterrose]

          ( xavier serrano , cis male , he / him, 23 ) no way ! i swear i saw 𝐌𝐈𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐄𝐋 𝐅𝐋𝐎𝐑𝐄𝐒 walking down danforth avenue ! i just saw a post about them on 6secrets ! i think it said something like “𝐌𝐈𝐊𝐄𝐘 𝐅𝐋𝐎𝐑𝐄𝐒 𝐒𝐏𝐎𝐓𝐓𝐄𝐃 𝐋𝐄𝐀𝐕𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐅𝐀𝐌𝐎𝐔𝐒 𝐀𝐂𝐓𝐎𝐑'𝐒 𝐇𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐑𝐈𝐒𝐄 𝐀𝐓 𝟓 𝐀𝐌 : 𝐑𝐎𝐌𝐀���𝐂𝐄 𝐎𝐑 𝐘𝐄𝐓 𝐀𝐍𝐎𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐑 𝐅𝐋𝐈𝐍𝐆 ?”. isn’t that wild ? i guess that makes sense since they’re apparently 𝐃𝐔𝐏𝐋𝐈𝐂𝐈𝐓𝐎𝐔𝐒 and 𝐂𝐔𝐍𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆. fans will claim that they’re 𝐎𝐏𝐓𝐈𝐌𝐈𝐒𝐓𝐈𝐂 and 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐑𝐈𝐒𝐌𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐂.  i mean , it’s not like i know them personally — they’re a famous 𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐅𝐄𝐒𝐒𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐀𝐋 𝐃𝐀𝐍𝐂𝐄𝐑 / 𝐘𝐎𝐔𝐓𝐔𝐁𝐄𝐑. whenever i think of them, i think of 𝐋𝐈𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐌𝐔𝐒𝐂𝐋𝐄𝐒 𝐔𝐍𝐃𝐄𝐑 𝐅𝐈𝐓𝐓𝐄𝐃 𝐖𝐇𝐈𝐓𝐄 𝐓-𝐒𝐇𝐈𝐑𝐓𝐒, 𝐔𝐍𝐑𝐔𝐋𝐘 𝐂𝐇𝐎𝐂𝐎𝐋𝐀𝐓𝐄 𝐂𝐔𝐑𝐋𝐒 𝐀𝐁𝐎𝐕𝐄 𝐀𝐕𝐈𝐀𝐓𝐎𝐑 𝐒𝐔𝐍𝐆𝐋𝐀𝐒𝐒𝐄𝐒, & 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐑𝐌𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐒𝐔𝐍𝐋𝐈𝐓 𝐒𝐌𝐈𝐋𝐄𝐒 𝐆𝐑𝐀𝐂𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐈𝐍𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐆𝐑𝐀𝐌 𝐒𝐓𝐎𝐑𝐈𝐄𝐒. i wish i would have asked for an autograph ! ( oliver, they / them, 22, est ).

𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐒𝐓𝐎𝐑𝐘

— mikey was born and raised in winnipeg because i think it’s funny when characters are from winnipeg. if you’re from winnipeg i’m so sorry. definitely was born on the coldest day of that year ( so like some point in january )

— but because of those long, cold harsh winters, mikey found himself in a dance studio a lot. his aunt was a dance teacher and with rather absent parents who meant well but both had long hours at the local hospital, he spent a lot of time with her. he fell in love with dance pretty early on, always having a certain fluidity and grace even when he was young.

— random but he also played hockey up until he was like 16 or whatever because he’s canadian and i’m not stupid. it happened. he can still skate tho. in a slightly different life he probably would have been a pretty good figure skater huh 🤔🤔🤔 but anyway...

— also feel like it makes sense that he did gymnastics. and trained in classical ballet.

— he went to university of toronto for college, studying kinesology and dance, and danced at one of the prestigious studios in the city.

— his big break moment was when in his sophomore year at ut, he made it onto the second season of world of dance in early 2017 ( lets pretend that show has been on longer than it has bc i don’t want it to be the first season of it sldk ). he made it all the way to the finals and quickly become a fan favorite along the way. though he ultimately placed second and missed out on the million dollars, that was the beginning of many doors opening for him. ( for those who, might have the vaguest clue what i’m talking about : i’m highkey feeling like, michael dameski style which is an idea i had after i named him michael so don’t @ me for him having the same first name ).

— millions watched that show, including some prominent agents and scouts who were able to help him launch a professional dance career : something he never thought he’d see himself actually doing. his first big gig was making the dance team for some singer’s north american tour, and he ended up not returning to ut to pursue a professional dance career full time. since then he’s danced in a few music videos for some uber famous musican ( same one he went on tour with or not idk ?? also a wc ?? maybe ?? ), a tv show, couple movies, and other various gigs around the city. he works part time at a studio when he has time, and has been honing his choreography skills as well.

— he makes enough dancing, but certainly not enough to make him RICH. no, that come from an impromptu vlog he did while on tour with aforementioned singer. having already garnered a following from world of dance, he soon rose to youtube fame as well, something he never could have predicted. i feel like his videos are very just, day in a life with various random athletic challenges mixed in, and various workout and flexibility tips. he also still does pieces and duets with other prominent dancers just for fun too. his natural charisma and attitude really just carries him through easily lmao.

— mikey developed a bit of a habit of sleeping around when he left for college, all the newfound freedom was just intoxicating and well. he was hot so. it wasn’t like it was hard alsdkjf. that stuck around well into his blossoming dance career. nothing that was enough to be scandalous, but he made his way around. and then a year and a half into this unforeseen new life, he met matthew glass.

— he’d had a couple serious relationships before, one in high school, one his freshman year of college but neither of them could hold a flame to what he felt when he was with matt. perfection wasn’t something mikey believed in, but he almost did with what they had.

— it was like for over a year and a half he lived in this insane dream, and then mikey and matt broke up and he was devastated ( behind closed doors and with curtains pulled tightly shut ).

— he then proceeded to broadcast how perfectly fine he was doing by going back to his old ways and sleeping around obsessively, this time with very little regard as to how many headlines he was making. as far as coping mechanisms go, i guess sex is better than alcohol ?? not to say he wasn’t also drunk at times l o l.

𝐌𝐈𝐒𝐂

— mikey gets around. has definitely been trying to forget matty with other warm bodies but honestly it’s not working

— very bi. very much does not care. if the world didn’t know he was before, it definitely does now lmao. he hasn’t come out in the sense he’s like posted a video about it and said “i’m bisexual” but it’s pretty obvious from the media and maybe he has gotten asked in interviews and has just shrugged and been like does it matter ?? i’m sorry he’s not the vocal bi ally we need. perhaps we will work on that.

— hasn’t dated anyone since matt bc he’s highkey lowkey still hung up on him but no one needs to know that right. outwardly, he’s very much the same : seemingly happy, but he’s a lot more careful with his heart and letting people close to him. if anything he’s become a bit of a two-way mirror, always seeing out but never really letting people see in, just what they want to see.

— probably goes without saying but extremely flexible. idk if any of you know who juuse saros is but apparently he can twerk in a split and i’m not saying mikey can but like. he just might be able to...

— straight up does not get cold. never wears more than a hoodie, probably danced shirtless in the middle of winter just fine. at least being from winnipeg is good for one ( 1 ) thing.

— i feel like people call him flower. idk guys. maybe im just thinking too much abt hockey goalies.

— always posting on instagram stories. u kno the type.

𝐏𝐄𝐑𝐒𝐎𝐍𝐀𝐋𝐈𝐓𝐘

— he tends to be extremely underestimated as he comes across a bit dumb and generally has a pretty positive outlook on life which people confuse for him being naive when that isn’t the case. but he’s found he can use that it his advantage and that sometimes, people will tell him things they think he can’t understand but he hears and remembers everything. it’s helped him out of a few difficult situations before.

— i feel like he has a bit of ethan dolan’s personality & dumbass energy idk guys...

— live in the moment kind of dude. his motto is probably like : you just gotta know what you want to do next. i mean looking back on his life it’s been pretty crazy and that’s only solidified his outlook that like, you really can’t control too much. just let it go where it takes you.

— people do like him though and they like talking to him for whatever reason. generally has pretty trustworthy vibes but he’s more slippery than he comes across. he’s a selfish person at heart and always has his own best interests in mind, even if it doesn’t seem that way at first.

— extroverted. i think ??

𝐀𝐏𝐏𝐄𝐀𝐑𝐄𝐍𝐂𝐄

— 6′1″. chocolate brown eyes. curly brown hair. he has a lithe but extremely fit build due to his career. his core strength is especially impressive.

— he has a monochromatic lineart tattoo of a rose on his left forearm / wrist and a butterfly ( again monochromatic & just lineart ) on his right shoulder. small scar at the base of his neck by his ear from an unfortunate hockey accident.

— needs glasses but usually only wears contacts unless he’s in his apartment late at night.

— he’s not overly fashionable, going more for comfort than how he generally looks. on a regular day, he’s probably got the whole... college athlete look going if you know what i mean. a big fan of mirrored aviator sunglasses. wouldn’t know what dressing up meant even if it slapped him in the face.

— PINTEREST BOARD

𝐖𝐀𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐃 𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐍𝐄𝐂𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐒

first and foremost i want to say that i like to vibe and brainstorm with people to come up with unique connections between our characters but here are a few ideas :

— ( f ) a close friend he has had on his channel a few times and fans passionately ship them but they’re really just good friends. maybe they play into the drama a few times as well tho. — the singer whose tour he danced on — singer whose music videos he’s been in — mayhaps even actors for that tv show / movie he was in ( v small role but whatevs. maybe they just Vibed yknow ) — flirtationship 😔 — always ye ol good hookup l o l — we keep running into each other idk maybe we should talk ??

TAKEN CONNECTIONS PAGE HERE

𝐎𝐎𝐂

         hey guys, i’m ollie. my intros are either written really eloquently or a big mess bc im trying to rub together a couple braincells at 1 am and whatever comes out, comes out. no need to guess which category this one falls into lmAO. anyway, i’m a slow plotter bc i’m easily overwhelmed trying to do too many things at once but i swear i will try to get to as many people as i can. and yeah this entire character is inspired by my love of world of dance don’t @ me... if u made it all the way down here u should watch this bc 😳 & mikey has the same athleticism and strength.

[actualbird]

Hope you're doing well! ♥️

So I have a confession to make: I haven't played ToT for a whole week now. I'm kinda scared to go back in because of the new event, (the Christmas one) because I'm afraid I won't finish it in time but at the same time I don't want to miss out on it so I have just been sitting in this limbo.

I think I maybe burned out because I finished everything? So the only thing I looked forward to were the events (some of the events were brilliant, some not so much) and in my opinion, they aren't spaced apart enough for me to enjoy them. I play this game for the story so when there isn't much of it, it's hard to just even log in daily - keeping in mind I haven't missed a single day since I got the game.

I really hope we get new main and character stories soon because I can't see myself being interested enough?

I'm genuinely lost because I absolutely love this game!

I don't know, these are just my ramblings.

I'm 👌 this close to sending you angst about Luke dumping Marius and Aaron accidentally telling the NXX team about Luke's condition 😅

P.S. The recent Artem fic - first of all, how dare you make me tear up again? Secondly, I can imagine Artem grading himself after the appointments, like: Oh, the therapists didn't like what I said, I get an F!

LIKE NO! YOU CAN'T WIN OR LOSE THERAPY, YOU DUM DUM!

I just want to hug him! ♥️

Okay, that was a lot! Please take care! 🌺

hullo, hibiscus!!! i hope ur doing well too :DDD

ooooohhh i can relate to this sentiment!! i havent stopped playing but i deffo feel a big mood at "events coming in too fast to enjoy them" like yep yep. im STILL processing luke bday and now theres xmas partyland!! before that, i was STILL processing symphony of the night and then RRG part 1 happened gbsdjkgsd

tho if it's any consolation, the current event Xmas Partyland doesnt have any event plot like Symphony of the Night or RRG. it's just a boardgame thing, like Summer Breeze!!!

also not sure if i u kno but it seems tot wants the global server to catch up to the cn server (i talk about it here and here) so that global wont stay 1 year behind cn server forever. this has pros (more stuff at a faster pace) but also cons (MORE STUFF AT A FASTER PACE, IT'S HARD TO KEEP UP, also it's fuckin up some of the relationship development espeeeeecially mc and marius hoo boy)

based on the cn server, we should be getting the Personal Story 3 AND Main Story 6 installments in February of next year, 2022 (the pvs for them for the cn server was released at that time, 2021), but again, with how tot wants global to catch up, who knows if we're gonna get it earlier.

i'd REALLY LOVE IT EARLIER. i want the main and personal stuff earlier and the events a liiiiittle bit more spaced out bc tbh, i can only write so much so fast to respond to it all HAHA (im enjoying myself, yes, but im close to collapsing at the end of every day so UH)

anyway, if ur excited for more story already, i guess one solution is to watch/read translation of cn server content!!! ofc only if u want, i used to be somebody who didnt want Any Future Spoilers At All, but then luke pearce happened and now im in shambles, i know what happens in future personal story, im in pain SO MUCH PAIN BUT ALSO it rlly bolstered my excitement a bunch, if that makes sense?

sdkjfsbkjBJKSD LMAO AT THE ANGST, HIBISCUS. as always, im very open to receiving angst hcs OwO.....just be prepared for me to find some kinda way to give it a hopeful happy ending HAHA, i have trouble accepting bad endings, when it comes to love....

thank you for reading "designed to send mixed signals, one image made up of different pixels" :DDDD!! sorry for the tears tho skjfbkjBK AND UR RIGHT. YEAH. THATS AN ARTEM THING TO DO (and also something i did back when i was having therapy, OOPSIE DOODLE)

artem: can i see the grading rubrics for this?

dr reyes: artem, this is therapy. there are no grading rubrics.

artem: oh. oh no. what do i do now, then?

dr reyes: love yourself, ideally, but we'll get there.

take care as well, hibiscus!!!!!

[hqolympia]

chicago’s very own 𝐎𝐋𝐘𝐌𝐏𝐈𝐀 𝐇𝐀𝐑𝐆𝐑𝐎𝐕𝐄 has been spotted on madison avenue driving a chevrolet corvette z06 , welcome ! your resemblance to 𝒃𝒂𝒓𝒃𝒂𝒓𝒂 𝒑𝒂𝒍𝒗𝒊𝒏 is unreal . according to tmz , you just had your 𝒕𝒘𝒆𝒏𝒕𝒚 𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒓𝒅 birthday bash . your chance of surviving new york is uncertain because you’re 𝒊𝒏𝒅𝒆𝒄𝒊𝒔𝒊𝒗𝒆 , but being 𝒗𝒆𝒓𝒔𝒂𝒕𝒊𝒍𝒆 might help you . i think being a 𝒈𝒆𝒎𝒊𝒏𝒊 explains that .  3 things that would paint a better picture of you would be 𝐦𝐢𝐝𝐧𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐝𝐫𝐢𝐯𝐞𝐬 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐬𝐢𝐝𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐭𝐨𝐰𝐧 ,  𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐨𝐧 𝐭𝐨𝐩 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐭𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐛𝐮𝐢𝐥𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐟𝐞𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐫𝐞𝐞𝐳𝐞 𝐨𝐧 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐬𝐤𝐢𝐧 & 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐥𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐬 𝐟𝐥𝐢𝐜𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐚𝐠𝐚𝐢𝐧𝐬𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐚𝐭 𝐧𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 . 

hi ,  peachy !  my  name’s  char  &  that  smile  of  yours  is  making  my  heart  melt !  🥺 allow  me  to  introduce  u  to  my  fren  over  here !

full name :  olympia  giselle  hargrove

nickname :  oly ,  pia  (tho, the latter one is reserved for her grandmother)

date of birth :  may  22nd , 1997  (23) 

birth place :  chicago , il

sexual orientation : pansexual

occupation :  competitive diver

labels :  the  crimson  /  the  icarian

𝐢.  𝐃𝐈𝐒𝐒𝐄𝐑𝐓𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍

one :  picture a little girl with bright blue eyes, pigtails bouncing with every step she takes as a grin makes its way upon her face . she seems happy ---- and in the moment she truly is, despite the fact that the people she needs the most, her parents, are a few thousand miles away and aren’t here to see olympia say her first words or take her first step. she is too young to understand --- honestly, too young to even think about the reasons why they left her.

two :  she is a little bit older now, a full-on eleven years old --- taller, thinner and, most importantly, rowdier. she has quite a few friends, although they all seem to be having picnics with their barbie dolls and sleepovers dedicated to watching princess movies whereas olympia wants to run around and jump all over the place. the girls just don’t seem to match her energy, the boys aren’t exactly welcoming towards her, having this stupid, “ew, but you’re a girl!” mindset. she just wants to find something for herself, something that will keep her interested for longer than three hours ---- that something turned out to be diving.

three :  it’s a few years later, and now she’s standing at the 10m platform. it’s her last dive, and she needs to get it exactly right to win the gold medal. olympia would honestly be lying if she said her legs weren’t shaking because of how nervous she was --- but there’s a camera right in front of her face, therefore she has to keep it together. she turns around, takes one last breath, and then she’s up in the air. fifteen seconds later she’s fully submerged into water ----- and fifteen minutes later she has tears coming out of her eyes. she did it. she’s the world champion now.

four : it’s exactly a year later, and a lot has changed. olympia finds herself in the sunny city of rio de janeiro where she’s come to compete in her first olympic games --- which is exactly what she’s always been meant to do, judging by the name her parents gave her. except this time she’s nervous for an entirely different reason --- she’s now a successful athlete, this season’s leader and the one to watch out for. she’s the reigning world champion, for god’s sake, so she has to prove every single person out there she didn’t win on an accident. a lot of things seem to be going wrong; from oly flubbing her first dive to her coach coming up to her before her final one to say that her parents have showed up at the arena. eventually she finds herself in the same exact position as she did back in Russia ---- her palms are sweating, her legs are shaking, but there’s no turning back. the only way is down, so she has to dive one way or another. a jump, two somersaults, a twist ----- she’s back in the pool, and as she immediately drowns in the roar coming from the audience, tears start coming out of her eyes. she did it again. she’s lived up to her name.

five :  ever since she got back home, her life has completely changed. interview after interview, a campaign after a photoshoot, an event after the other ---- all of that mixed in with her training routine has it ups and downs. her schedule keeps her busy yet there’s something missing. she’s looking everywhere in the hopes of finding that missing piece, and at some point she feels like she’s found it in the face of a stranger who ends up in her bed that night. it brings her a sense of serenity, that lasts a few weeks ---- but olympia knows it’s all too good to be true, and it’s proven to be that way as she stumbles upon a certain page on a random night. it doesn’t seem real at first, but when she spots a tattoo on the girl’s ribcage, a realization hits her ---- she’s plastered all over porn sites, and that particular video featuring her has generated a few million views in a span of two months. she doesn’t remember the night at first due to her drunken state, but she recognizes her bedroom, particularly a personalized louis vuitton gym bag sitting in the corner. details like that help her piece the night together, and from that point on there’s nothing but fear of it all coming out and ruining her career.

𝐢𝐢.  𝐏𝐄𝐑𝐒𝐎𝐍𝐀

basically ! this intro is all over the place so here are some bullet points to get u up to speed !

oly was born in chicago but grew up and spent most of her time in toronto with her grandmother, since her parents were setting up their business overseas. they were coming by to visit her maybe once or twice a year, so she isn’t as close with them.

she is a competitive diver (a quite decorated one bc .... why wouldn’t she be 🥺🥺🥺)  representing canada bc of her upbringing despite the fact that she now lives in new york (she moved here in 2017, after the rio olympics)

astrology wise, she is a gemini sun cancer rising .... so sorry to all of u for this

her placements mean that she is quite creative, capricious and may appear manic sometimes --- but really she is just downright STUPID bc she is always trying to get her ass into trouble. like, you can’t even imagine how many times her coach had to drag her out of the mess she got herself into ... 

she is very much about having sympathy for others and helping them and whatnot, but unbeknownst to her, these tendencies can be explained by the “keep your friends close and your enemies closer” mindset. she has to keep her act straight, so getting onto someone’s bad side isn’t in the cards for her --- god knows what kind of shit she may end up in now that she’s a part of ... this world of glamour and fame, u kno?

olympia also really loves to talk, preach, argue --- just do whatever to be heard

in her free time (the time when she doesn’t feel like wreaking havoc tbh) she usually cooks deserts (vegan banana pudding? blackberry sorbet? key lime cheesecake? u want it, u got it!), reads books (painted veil by somerset is her ultimate FAV) and ... drives around town whilst listening to some cheesy music 🥺 

other than that her usual routine consists of training, clubbing and messing shit up due to the chaotic stupid personality !

𝐢𝐢𝐢.  𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐍𝐄𝐂𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐒

i promise this intro won’t be that long ... after this ! 🤠🤠🤠these are just the few ideas i can get off the top of my head so ... there’s always room for brainstorming ! :-)

𝐂𝐎𝐌𝐅𝐎𝐑𝐓 𝐂𝐑𝐎𝐖𝐃 / close friends --- everybody needs some sort of a support system in their life, and oly is no exception to this rule. she’s never really had a big family, therefore she’s always surrounded herself with people in the hopes of filling the empty space in her heart. and honestly, if it wasn’t for these people, she would’ve quit diving right after winning the olympics, moved to the suburbs of toronto and just lived a quiet life --- but the pride for her friends just gives her enough motivation to move further and become better.

𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐍𝐄𝐑𝐒 𝐈𝐍 𝐂𝐑𝐈𝐌𝐄 / best friend --- we all have that someone who’s impossibly close to us; who we cannot imagine our lives without. the bond is so crucial to them both parties that it feels as if there’s never been a moment without each other. the general public and tabloids, though, feel as if there’s more going on and will not stop nagging them about the details.

𝐃𝐄𝐀𝐑𝐋𝐘 𝐃𝐄𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐄𝐃 / friends drifted apart / exes --- as weird as it is, oly is very much a yolo person. in addition to that, she has a ton of love and devotion for every single person she’s ever had in her life no matter what happened between them or what caused them to drift apart. though, her ever-changing nature is known to drive people away which, tbh, happens to be a blessing and a curse -- it helps oly sort of “filter” through her circle of friends, but then again, if someone enters her life, they leave and undeniable impact on it. therefore, she misses whoever left her life more than they could ever imagine.

𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐑𝐘𝐁𝐎𝐃𝐘 𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄𝐒 𝐘𝐎𝐔 / rival (?) --- olympia isn’t perfect in any way, shape or form. she knows that, but most importantly, the public knows that and will not stop critiquing every little thing that she does. this person, though, is the exact opposite - the public LOVES them to the point where even olympia’s parents would probably say things like “ugh, i wish you could be more like that!”. this makes the relationship between the two quite ... strained. because as much as olympia may love them as a person, there’s always this lingering sense of jealousy that just enables her petty side.

𝐢𝐯. 𝐎𝐎𝐂

ok so ! if you’ve reached this part of my intro ... i cannot thank u enough bc this ?? this is long as HECK but i wanted to actually try and describe the kind of muse i envision in my head. i love u all a latte & if u feel like plotting w/ my dumb kid, leave a like on this post or feel free to mssg me on discord under futurenostalgias#1692 🤠sidenote tho: i’ll probably get to the mssgs in a few hours seeing as i have a few assignments to complete and i’m sorta braindead ... love u , cannot wait to write w/ u ! xoxo ur friendly neighborhood trash char  

[ironcrwned-archive]

guess who’s back, back again. it me, resident clown once more bringing you another villain kid because they are just ... too fun. anyways , i’ll have some tidbits about him down below , so just give this video a thumbs up and don’t forget to click the notification bell ! ( i’m so cringey & going crazy but pls plot with us )

𝐈𝐍𝐓𝐑𝐎𝐃𝐔𝐂𝐈𝐍𝐆 : 𝐚𝐝𝐨𝐧𝐢𝐬 𝐦𝐨𝐨𝐧  –– THE LOTHARIO

charles melton. twenty-six. cismale. he/him. 2 sibs. ––– hey , there’s ADONIS MOON from THE ISLE walking past the castle. they’re the ADOPTED MIDDLE child of URSULA, isn’t that cool ? talk says they can be pretty - EGOTISTICAL , but don’t let that worry you – they can be + CHARMING too. say , don’t you think they remind you of SILK SHEETS, HUSHED VOICES AS THEY SNEAK AROUND, THE BURN IN YOUR MUSCLES AFTER EXERCISE, or is that just me ? 

𝒒𝒖𝒊𝒄𝒌 𝒇𝒂𝒄𝒕𝒔 

so adonis , is one of my favorite oc’s of mine and he really is just like,,,viktor krum mixed with prince nikolai from kos/tgt/soc by leigh bardugo okay?

so he was adopted by ursula when he was like ... 5? so he really only remembers her and nothing of his real fam ( which is good bc they were just some criminals on the isle )

also ... doesn’t have a middle name

and yeah ursula is ... ursula but she LOVED her kids okay. for a little bit when he was a teenager he was kinda nervous like what if she...doesn’t love me bc i’m not “hers” but then he quickly snapped out of that because he knows

i imagine ursula being ... almost a helicopter mom ?? just making sure her kids weren’t being hurt and whatnot

but ofc adonis was constantly hanging out with friends in the water and stuff so he’s a bit adventurous and definitely gave his mom like ... ten thousand heart attacks on a daily basis

now, he’s super excited to be in auradon and while he loves his mom, he’s always wanted to see what life is like being on the good side lol ( definitely could see himself as a prince okay )

𝒑𝒆𝒓𝒔𝒐𝒏𝒂𝒍𝒊𝒕𝒚 

okay so adonis is very ummmm FULL OF HIMSELF

he’s attractive and he’s known that since he was a teenager ( went thru a terrible puberty stage )

and now he’s super confident and flirtatious and will flirt with anyone that looks him longer than .4 seconds 

kind of a drama queen?? 

but he can be slightly willing to help someone out but will most likely ask for a favor in return, very self serving 

big partier tho ( s*x , dr*gs , & rock n roll )

will try to charm his way out of trouble, into places, just in general conversations really 

he’s a scorpio sun and leo rising with an aries moon ( Chaotic )

𝒑𝒍𝒂𝒚𝒍𝒊𝒔𝒕 

u know the Vibe

i. physical // dua lipa. – ii. back of a cab // king princess. – iii. no limit // g-eazy. – iv. bad guy // billie eilish. – v. gucci linen // blackbear. – vi. immigrant song // led zeppelin. 

𝒘𝒂𝒏𝒕𝒆𝒅 𝒑𝒍𝒐𝒕𝒔

so i dont have a tag for him yet

so i’m just gonna list some things !

chaotic friends ! they get into so much trouble ( probably going out all the time & stuff ) 

give him a good influence .. pls ... i beg of u help this boy

then ofc he needs to be a bad influence on someone else ,,,, balance

most likely hook ups. and honestly, i’m not going to limit him ( open to m/f/nb !! )

but yeah we always love some slow burn stuff too but u kno ,, chemistry

this intro is a whole circus with clowns and all but just like this and i’ll come annoy you !

[wetalkinboutbooks]

Dread Nation by Justina Ireland

Summary: Jane McKeene was born two days before the dead began to walk the battlefields of Gettysburg and Chancellorsville—derailing the War Between the States and changing America forever. In this new nation, safety for all depends on the work of a few, and laws like the Native and Negro Reeducation Act require certain children attend combat schools to learn to put down the dead. But there are also opportunities—and Jane is studying to become an Attendant, trained in both weaponry and etiquette to protect the well-to-do. It’s a chance for a better life for Negro girls like Jane. After all, not even being the daughter of a wealthy white Southern woman could save her from society’s expectations.

But that’s not a life Jane wants. Almost finished with her education at Miss Preston’s School of Combat in Baltimore, Jane is set on returning to her Kentucky home and doesn’t pay much mind to the politics of the eastern cities, with their talk of returning America to the glory of its days before the dead rose. But when families around Baltimore County begin to go missing, Jane is caught in the middle of a conspiracy, one that finds her in a desperate fight for her life against some powerful enemies. And the restless dead, it would seem, are the least of her problems. (Taken from Goodreads)

Our Ratings:  

 → Geena:  ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

 → Kae: ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Overall: This is one of the first suggestions we got and HOO BOY IT WAS A GOOD ONE. The perfect mix of action, comedy, murder, and beating up racists.... exactly what we need in a book. 

~Spoiler-full discussion below~ 

The Good:

→ Jane

Geena: I don’t think I’ve read a book where the protagonist just has so much raw power like… at the risk of sounding like I’m from 2012.. But like… my mind was totally blown. We meet Jane during a training exercise at Miss Preston’s zombie slaughtering school where we learn about all the nasty details that lead to the school’s creation. SO ESSENTIALLY, following the civil war (which ended prematurely bc u kno…. zombies) slavery is “abolished” and instead the whites decided it’d be better to set up schools to train black and native people to kill zombies for them 🙄 AND that’s where we meet Jane, in the middle of a training exercise. We also learn that she’s the daughter of one of the more wealthy white women in the area which was very scandalous given the u kno.. R a c i s m… and that even her mother’s status couldn’t keep her from being sent to the school. Jane also recounts moments from her childhood such as almost being killed when she was born… and she does it so nonchalantly that I fucking died dude. 

Kae: Nobody: …..

Jane: Yeah my momma tried to drown me. She doesn’t think I remember but I do… ANYWAY. 

Geena: LMAOOOOOOO YEA I FUCKING LOST IT LIKE DO YOU SEE WHAT I MEAN LIKE SHE IS SO RAW… BUT YEA, also Justina Ireland does this cool thing where she has excerpts from the letters Jane sends her mother which outline events that are VERY different from what actually happens in the chapter, and fuck I loved that sm. Jane is I think one of the girls that can read at the school and she’s got a liking for the science behind the biology of zombies but she gets in trouble cONSTANTLY because she’s too cool for Miss Preston’s school… ok jk no she gets into trouble because she always manages to piss off that one racist ass bitch, Miss Anderson. In the first few chapters we learn that Jane is smart, strong, and a total babe even though she doesn’t think so :(. 

I loved how Jane was written to be slightly hot-headed but not like bullheaded, like she would get angry real quick but she’d know when to act on her urges to beat the shit out of people. And I guess this stems from her childhood like…. SHE MURDERS HER DAD IN COLD BLOOD BC HE TRIED TO CHOKE THE LIFE OUTTA HER and also to preserve her mom’s secret which was that she was a white-passing black woman. And bc her dad was a racist white man Jane knew that wouldn’t bode well for anyone…. She did all this when she was like eight so like…. WILD (It’s what he deserved tho) but yea ever since then Jane’s been playing the game like a pro. She’s a pro zombie slayer that doesn’t take shit from ANYONE even when it lands her in trouble, and she cares a lot for the people around her even though she might pretend that she’s only out to get back to her mom. AND I LOVE HER for everything she does, but FUCK SHE WENT THROUGH SO MUCH SHIT IN THIS BOOK THAT IT HURT TO READ. ALSO WE FIND OUT THAT SHE’S BI…. WE STAN A BISEXUAL BADASS

→ Katherine

Kae:  Geena summed up, Jane very well! Jane is smart (and could read so her teachers were pissed), strong, and just an all around badass. I really love her. She deserves the world. 

Well, moving on to Katherine. Katherine is another student at Miss. Prestons school and she and Jane don’t get along well. Kate, as Jane calls her, which Katherine HATES, because she likes to be called by her full name. She is white passing with very light skin and blue eyes. She has blonde, loose curly hair and is described as absolutely gorgeous. Jane is a little jealous of her and hates admitting it. But she’s like “She’s gorgeous, it is what it is… But she’s from Virgina so ugh.” Katherine is right up to par with Jane’s zombie slaying skills and is the top of her class. Katherine is dainty, bougie, and a total rule follower. She’s into fashion and trying to find a good job protecting white folks from zombies when she graduates Miss. Prestons. She thinks of Jane as a little unruly and wild. But she tries her damndest to be respectful to Jane, even if they can’t stand each other.  

So, moving forward a bit. Kate is kind of nosey so she’s always catching Jane doing some shit she isn’t supposed to be doing… like having books smuggled to her by a boy named Red Jack. She also overhears Jane and Jack discussing how his sister went missing and he needs help to find her. So, she self invites and tags along later that night. In the mean time,  Jane and Kate have a lecture they need to attend to. When they get there, they realize that there is going to be a demonstration of proof that a “Shambler Cure” actually works. Shamblers are zombies. So this professor has a cage of three zombies and has some poor, black man risk himself and get bit. He has supposedly already been injected with the cure. Jane was like “this shit fake… He boutta die.” And Jane tries to interrupt, but she is quickly hushed. The antidote or cure or whatever DOESN’T work and the dude turns into a zombie. Jane shoots him down, then the other zombies get loose and now everyone is in a panic. Jane and Katherine take them down and save the day. A few weeks later, that are invited to the mayors house to “protect” it. (They really were only asked just so they could show up and be seen…) Someone turns into a Shambler, Jane takes them down, then that’s settled. So now they’ve saved the day TWICE. 

Red Jack has somehow SNUCK IN to the damn mayors house, so him and Jane do some snooping. They get caught. Then by default, Katherine gets in trouble. Well, Katherine gets in trouble because she is too pretty and none of the white women want her around because they think their husbands or whoever will start to be like👀  and the women get jealous. Katherine was out of a job before it even started because she’s just too damn gorgeous. So Kate, Jane, and Red Jack get sent off to the WILD WILD WEST BAYBEEE. But it actually sucks.  Let’s talk about Red Jack before we get into that though.

Geena: NGL KATE’S THE TYPE OF GIRL I WOULD’VE ABSOLUTELY HATED TOO IF I WAS JANE BUT!!!!! I love how we get to see the friendship develop between the two as they both learn about each other’s past and that maybe they CAN be friends. Also, Kate is ace and wants to travel the world which I RESPECT… but oh yea I was gonna say Jane and Kate are the true enemies to best friends trope. ALSO HER BACKSTORY IS SAD BRUH LIKE everyone looking down on her bc she’s from virginia smh……… okay but seriously the fact that Kate was constantly trying so hard to compensate for the fact that she came from a brothel that she became Miss Perfect (OR AT LEAST that’s what we learn from Jane’s perspective and as @zemenipearls pointed out Jane isn’t a reliable narrator so Kate’s backstory is kinda shady at this point but that’s what we think it is) 

→ Red Jack 

Kae: Let’s talk about Red Jack! Jackson Keats, aka Red Jack is Jane's ex boyfriend. He got the name “Red Jack” because he’s a redbone. He’s described with light brown skin and blue eyes. He also has a gold tooth and short curly hair with hints of auburn. He’s smart and can scheme his ass off and is known for taking big risks.  He also smuggles Jane books when she ask and send letters out to her mother for her. It’s also noted that he cannot read. He deals in dirty business, mostly scamming people out of money. But the kid has to make a living! I like him. Jack has a little sister named Lilly who is white passing. So he sent her with a nice white family who would let her blend in with them so she could avoid being sent off to a school like Miss. Prestons. Jack and Jane, despite them being exes, are decent friends I think. Jane hates to admit it, but she still likes Jack (even though he gets on her nerves). 

At a certain point, Jack’s little sister, along with the family she is staying with, completely disappear. Their house in still in tact, but they aren’t there. He’s worried because his sister would’ve sent word if she knew they were leaving. But he hadn’t heard a thing from her, and went to Jane. So Jane, Jack, and Kate end up at the Spencers’ house to look for clues. They can’t find anything, but they DO overhear Miss. Anderson and two other men say that they needed to clean the house out and remove all of their belongings. 

Later, when we get to the mayor’s dinner party that was previously mentioned, Jack and Jane run into each other and go snooping around the governor's office. There, Miss. Anderson is waiting for them and they are CAUGHT. She drags them to the Mayor’s basement where he is ready to send them off to a town called, Summerland, that is way out west. It’s a town where he is trying to uphold white supremecy and slavery.There, he will make sure that anyone who is black, is treated as if they are still slaves.  A man named Mr. Redfern, a Native man, escorts them out West. They are given dulled down weapons to protect the town from Shamblers, and well, this is just no good. When Jack and the crew arrive in Summerland, he punches the shit out of Redfern and tries to make a run for it. He is then tackled, jailed, and that’s the last we see of him… for a while. 

Geena: holy shit Kae litcherally outlined everything about Red Jack PERFECTLY. He’s how you would say a rascal… a cute rascal (Jane would agree). 

Kae: Lmao Jane’s got taste. I gotta give her that. BAD BOYZ are my thing lowkey

Geena: oKAY but SEE RED JACK IS A BAD BOI WITH A GOOD HEART. I mean yeh he and Jane had a “messy breakup” but they were still friends and he smuggled out letters for her mom and brought her books, and she helped him around with his ~business~ however shady it was. But I also liked how he was an idiot, I mean in the sense that UNLIKE JANE who knows how to control her anger and use it in the future, Jack just pops off like how Kae mentioned him decking Mr. Redfern. Jane thought about it but also thought ahead and realized she wouldn’t get far doing that. Red Jack tho… Boy thought he could outrun like 3 grown men 😭 AND WHEN THE READER AND JANE WERE LED TO BELIEVE THAT HE’D DIED?? BRO??? I WAS LIKE…. HOW U GONNA MAKE THIS CHARACTER A CHARMING LIL SHIT AND THEN KILL HIM ALMOST RIGHT AWAY…. BUT then when he came back I WAS THROWN.

Time to project BUT I love characters like Red Jack you know they’re shady and like to play everything off as a joke but when they get serious… they get serious. And I wonder what role he’s going to play in the second book, because all he cares about in his life is his family aka Lily right… Would he accompany Kate and Jane to save her momma when it would mean leaving Lily with people he probably can’t fully trust? Also, how did Jane and Red Jack even meet? I think it’d be cool to see where he came from, and what happened to the rest of his family and that’s another reason why I can’t wait till book 2!  

The Bad:

→ Miss. Preston and Miss Anderson

Geena: Man, we don’t even meet Miss Preston that long in the book like she has a few scenes here and there but god she is the fucking worst! Who runs a school and houses young black women and gives them a refined education with training with specialized weapons.. Only to ship them to a town where slavery is making a comeback??  And pretending like you care about them?? Disgusting… We all assume that Miss Preston is innocent and is busy running her school until the dinner that Kae has mentioned above where we find out that she’s in cahoots with the Mayor and has been supplying him girls from her school for as long as he has needed them… how “white allies” be sometimes… I really hope… from the bottom of my heart that she was devoured by a shambler bc it’s the only fate that she deserves you know… And then we have the hoe ass Miss Anderson who didn’t even try to hide her contempt of Jane and doted on Katherine → This we realize later into the book is solely because of how white-passing Katherine was and because Miss Anderson is a big ol’ racist who uses slurs like it’s nobody's business. 

Now, I realize that Ireland was trying to outline the different types of racists you come across in life. There’s those that pretend to be your friend and support you up front but behind your back they won’t hesitate to fuck you over (aka Miss Preston), like Miss Preston does help out Jane initially when she’s unfairly tested by Miss Anderson, but Preston also is the one to support sending Jane to Summerland so like….. and also we have your standard brand of racist aka Miss Anderson that doesn’t even try to hide how antiblack and dehumanizing she is because she straight up doesn’t care and knows that Jane or anybody else can do shit about it. 

→ Mr. Redfern

Kae: Okay, so now we’ve got Mr. Redfern. Mr. Redfern is a tall,  handsome, Native American man who is always scowling at Jane. He doesn’t like her and she isn’t sure why… That is, until our girl asks him. He thinks she is wasting her talents when she sneaks out and kills shamblers in the night. 

Geena: OKAY WAIT WAIT WAIT THIS BRINGS UP THE QUESTION.. HOW LONG HAS HE BEEN SPYING ON HER

Kae: OHHHH SHIT YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO WHAT THE FUCK. YOOO. HE HAD TO HAVE BEEN WATCHING HER FOR MONTHS. 

Geena: I FEEL LIKE…. THERE’S SOMETHING WE’RE MISSING BUT IDK WHAT

Kae: THIS IS WHAT I GET FOR BEING A SPEED READER. I BE MISSIN’ SHIT. Whew. Okay, so as you can see, we’ve just come to a sudden realization! Mr. Redfern is a sneaky son of a gun. 

But uhh, he mentions that he was taken from his tribe and sent off to one of the “Indian Shambler Schools” where he was given a new identity, etc. This is also basically what happened to Native Children back in those days, in order to erase their heritage and their entire selves. This was how they forced people to assimilate. They were sent to Indian Industrial Schools. 

Mr. Redfern is in cahoots with the Mayor (by force) and is the one to basically help kidnap Jackson, Jane, and Katherine. He stuffs them on a train for a week and at the end of their trip, they are out west. We don’t see him again after this. But later, we find out that he made Jackson a deal and sent him to a town not too far from Summerland to do “business”. Thus, when Jack returns to Summerland to steal ammunition for said town, he runs into Jane and Katherine and tells them Red Jack helped him out. 

ALTHOUGHHHH, REDFERN HELPED JACKSON, I DON’T LIKE HIM. HE WAS UNNECESSARILY MEAN TO JANE AND KIDNAPPED THE CREW AND THAT IS NOT ACCEPTABLE. 

Geena: Yess Mr. Redfern, the man we thought would be an ally but turned out to be the opposite. Once again this mimics history I suppose because there were instances of indigenous people aiding the whites when it came to slavery and I suppose Ireland was trying to write that but she also makes it writes that while he is helping them he doesn’t seem too proud of it. But the matter of the fact is, he’s still helping enforce the white man’s rules. Though I do hope with the turn of the second book Mr. Redfern leaves that shit behind and decides to fully switch sides, aka let the whites to their own dirty work and help the people with a real cause.

ALSO, I keep talking about the second book but I really hope we meet more indigenous characters that aren’t Mr. Redfern you know, but those that aren’t under the thumb of a white person :( ALTHOUGH, I love how Ireland has the excerpt at the end where it mentions the residential schools in-depth and she encourages readers to research more of it which leads me to believe that we’ll be hearing more of them coming the next book as well. 

Kae: Just one more small part. I was like, completely convinced that those looks Redfern were shooting at Jane was because he thought she was cute. That is until Jane was like “alright, he CLEARLY doesn’t like me” and I was like oh… I totally misread those signals and I’m an idiot. BUT WHATEVER IT’s FINE. I do, however, think he will turn around. I don’t think he’s like, inherently bad. He’s just forced to do bad shit. Everyone is trying to survive in this world and I’m NOT giving him an excuse, but like, I get it. Ya feel me?

Geena: oKAY BUT KAE I TOO THOUGHT HE WAS INTO HER SO THAT MAKES US BOTH BOOBOO THE FOOL. AND YEA, it comes down to survival in a world where you’re not even considered human BUT that doesn’t excuse any actions. 

Kae: .jpg “we irritating” meme 

Geena: Is it even our review if we don’t have at least one (1) meme reference

The Ugly:  

→ Every single white person (minus Mr. Gideon) 

Geena: So I really enjoyed this book but Justina Ireland didn’t pull any punches when it came down to the true and dark details of the time period she was writing. She captures the essence of white folks, even during an apocalypse they find the time to push their white supremacy and tread on the backs of the black and indigenous people. I was grinding my teeth for a majority of the book, the way people would talk down to all the black characters and simply refer to them as though they weren’t human.

Mayor Carr, the Sheriff, and the Priest are the faces of white supremacy that think it’s in their destiny to put down bipoc and use them as slaves (though they won’t call it that) and fuck dude… Mayor Carr is like Miss Preston, pretends to be an ally and is using the people he pretends to support as fodder for his white supremacist wasteland. Even Jane mentions that he’s no better than other white men but people pretend he’s the best politician they have.

The Sheriff doesn’t even disguise his racism, he’s your typical ‘slavery wasn’t that bad’ assfuck and the way he treats Katherine bc he has an ugly crush on her thinking she’s white is disgusting bc you know if he knew that she’s simply white-passing he’d probably murder her in cold blood… and when he finds out, the exact thing Jane was afraid would happen to her mother almost happens to Katherine (she almost dies at the hand of the Sheriff’s fugly ass)....and fuck Katherine handled it so well even though she was very much uncomfortable the whole time. And the way Jane murdered him?? With no remorse… I fucking loved that, IDK if Justina Ireland was trying to go for a Jane is unhinged vibe (bc that’s how Katherine reacted to it) but I was like fuck yea girl shoot him a few times more for good measure.

The Priest is the biggest shit of them all like I cannot even begin to…… Every time I think of his wrinkly ass my blood pressure rises three levels because holy fuck. He preaches that he’s a holy man and that he’s only carrying out the orders of God and so on, and it’s DIGOSTENG the way he uses the bible as a weapon to put down the black and indigenous folk around Summerland. He blames them for how they look and says it’s their duty to “serve their white superiors” as redemption so that they may get a place in heaven 🙄🙄🙄🙄 This reminds me of what Kae had mentioned before about the story of Nate Turner who knew how to read so the plantation owners would make him read a fucked-up version of the bible to the others and like….. White people really took a faith founded by a brown man and turned it into a weapon for their white supremacy it’s disgusting. But what was really sad was that there are still people to this day like the Priest that have pretty hefty roles in churches and so on… spewing their racist rhetoric and god I can’t even fucking deal, every time he and Jane interacted I just wanted her to snap his neck in half and call it a day…. Like what was his old ass gonna do? Fart? 

Kae: Sweet! So Geena pretty much covered everything. The Sheriff is a whole ass bitch and he has a bunch of lackeys doing his dirty work while he parades around Summerland and berates anyone who is of colour. Basically, he has black people shipped out to the West so they can sacrifice themselves to defend Summerlands inhabitants with faulty weaponry and experiments. When Jane brings up that she needs better weapons so she can do her job, she’s slapped for it and told to deal with it. The black people and everyone else who is considered of low status, are treated horribly. They’re all shoved in a hot attic with thin, dirty blankets to sleep on the floor. They are locked in their rooms at night and forbidden to leave until it is time for them to work again. They all also barely have enough to eat, so essentially, they are starving. Jane and her new companions are overworked, underfed, and are only able to bathe once a week. It’s truly barbaric. The Sheriff wants to make sure they know they are “below” white people and were only created to serve them. It’s disgusting and I wanted to kill the man myself. It was infuriating reading how horrible they were treated and all of the slurs they were called. Slurs I forgot even existed. 

The Sheriff catches Jane one night after she had snuck out, and beats her in front of the whole town. He ties her to a pole, strips her shirt off, and whips her. I actually had to skip that part because I couldn’t bare to read it. It was too much and I just couldn’t do it. I’ve seen enough of it. Jane, even though she is inches away from death, is saved by Katherine speaking out against it. Since the Sheriff has a crush on her, he stops, and allows Jane to join her in the safe part of Summerland to be her servant. I usually don’t like reading books about my people being so poorly treated, but Jane shot his ass point blank when she had the opportunity and I reveled in that. I love to see us fight back! 

As for the Priest, he is the Sheriff’s father so he helps influence the bullshit that goes on in town. It is also heavily implied that underestimating the Priest is not the best decision. He apparently beat someone to death so that’s fuckin wild, considering how much of an old racist fuck he is. ANYWAY, he gives sermons every night on how “the Negro” was meant to serve and how they are to “stay in their place” and I cringed through the whole thing. It was horrible. Almost no one in the town likes the Sheriff or the Priest. The whore’s, the “slaves”, and Mr. Gideon (the Mayor's son), were all forced to be in Summerland and they hate it and the two bastards in charge. This drives them to conduct a plan to kill them both so they can escape. The plan was to have Katherine pretend to be white, have the Sherif fall in love with her, then Jane takes him out of the picture. But things didn’t go as planned so it took a few extra steps of danger BUT they made it and scarcely avoided a big zombie horde, and made it out. 

Geena: OH YEA MR. GIDEON….. He’s supposed to be this scientist guy with a limp which we find out he does on purpose, and he KNOWS that Katherine is white-passing but he doesn’t say shit bc unlike the rest of the white men there he isn’t racist and he’s trying to figure out a way out of the town… Also, this man-made an electricity grid run off of zombies and that was so fucking funny to me for no reason other than it reminded me of a scene from a sitcom when Jane walked in on the contraption. ALSO, JANE MAY OR MAY NOT HAVE A THING FOR MR. GIDEON AND IT MAY OR MAY NOT BE RECIPROCATED? LIKE It’s funny reading Jane’s attraction to him like “he’s nerdy lookin… but in a cute way” but am I here for it?? Undecided...

Conclusion

Kae: So in conclusion, this book was really good. I enjoyed reading this AU of a zombfied civil war. It was interesting to see how things played out. I thought the world-building was pretty cool and I like how the South was called “The lost states” because they’d been lost to zombies. They also LOST THE WAR LMAOOO BITCHASSES. Anywaaaaay, I think Jane is such a strong, beautifully written character. She’s hotheaded, but she isn’t impulsive. She’s brave and she knows when to strike. She is smart, cunning, and a joy to be around. If she were real, I’d absolutely be her friend. She’s my kind of person. She keeps it real and I like that. Katherine is kind of complex and I can’t wait to find out more about her. She hides behind this proper, boujie demeanor, but I think a lot of it is a facade. I like how though Katherine is white-passing, she NEVER forgets or dismisses that she is black. She knows who she is and she hated pretending to be white. As for Jackson! He's impulsive, suave motherfucker and I hope we see more of him too! I think he’s going to have a bigger role to play in the next book and I’m ready to see what it’ll be. I can’t wait to find out what is in store for these characters because they are all beautifully written and their friendships are puuuure baybeeee.

Geena: GIRL YOU SUMMED UP ALL THE CHARACTERS REALLY WELL!!! You got everything that I loved about Jane, she’d be my idol irl… and Katherine is a really complex character and I’m excited to see how her story unfolds in the next book. SPEAKING OF WHICH…. THE COVER FOR THAT DROPPED AND O MY GOD…….. KATE AND JANE LOOK LIKE ABSOLUTE BABES and I cAN’T WAIT TO SEE THEM FUCK SHIT UP!