#we see you and appreciate you

[thedevilinmybrain]

Oli can't remember a time when Louis Tomlinson wasn't an integral part of his life. It's as if Louis has always been there, like he fit into his place and it was as natural as breathing, like a limb. Louis has that way about him, an uncanny ability to draw people in, to make you feel safe and at home. He's the sun and everyone else is just a part of the orbit, circling and circling, blinded but never once considering closing their eyes. Once you have Louis' favor, once you're one of his, you never want to lose it.

It feels good to know you have Louis' attention.

Oli can still remember primary school, how all the other lads would rush around, try to make Louis notice them, be his best mate. Stan always came close, always a good contender, and Calvin too. But only Oli was chosen to sit by Louis at every snack, on the reading carpet, often in the corner for time outs. It was Oli who listened to Louis sing in the car, in his room, working up the nerve to try out for the drama club. It was Oli who helped him memorize lines. The lads might have known about every crush, every sloppy make out in the back of a theater, about the girls who would stare and whisper from across the lunchroom. But it was Oli, on a cold September night laying on the floor next to Louis in his room, that had heard Louis ask about kissing boys.

They had grown up together, had bled together on the same cobblestone streets, rubbed grass stains from the same footie pitch into their knees. Oli was there for every birth of a sibling, for every long day at school, for every sleepover and movie night and mischief. He had been the one to watch Louis punch the first bully to ever pull on Oli's ears and hiss 'ginger minger‘ at him.

It was more than just in each other's pockets. They were brothers. No secrets between them. Made plans to be lads for the rest of their lives.

Then Louis went to an audition in London and he never came home.

[rice-enjoyer]

[inkskinned]

crows use tools and like to slide down snowy hills. today we saw a goose with a hurt foot who was kept safe by his flock - before taking off, they waited for him to catch up. there are colors only butterflies see. reindeer are matriarchical. cows have best friends and 4 stomachs and like jazz music. i watched a video recently of an octopus making himself a door out of a coconut shell.

i am a little soft, okay. but sometimes i can't talk either. the world is like fractal light to me, and passes through my skin in tendrils. i feel certain small things like a catapult; i skirt around the big things and somehow arrive in crisis without ever realizing i'm in pain.

in 5th grade we read The Curious Incident of the Dog In The Night-time, which is about a young autistic boy. it is how they introduced us to empathy about neurotypes, which was well-timed: around 10 years old was when i started having my life fully ruined by symptoms. people started noticing.

i wonder if birds can tell if another bird is odd. like the phrase odd duck. i have to believe that all odd ducks are still very much loved by the other normal ducks. i have to believe that, or i will cry.

i remember my 5th grade teacher holding the curious incident up, dazzled by the language written by someone who is neurotypical. my teacher said: "sometimes i want to cut open their mind to know exactly how autistics are thinking. it's just so different! they must see the world so strangely!" later, at 22, in my education classes, we were taught to say a person with autism or a person on the spectrum or neurodivergent. i actually personally kind of like person-first language - it implies the other person is trying to protect me from myself. i know they had to teach themselves that pattern of speech, is all, and it shows they're at least trying. and i was a person first, even if i wasn't good at it.

plants learn information. they must encode data somehow, but where would they store it? when you cut open a sapling, you cannot find the how they think - if they "think" at all. they learn, but do not think. i want to paint that process - i think it would be mostly purple and blue.

the book was not about me, it was about a young boy. his life was patterned into a different set of categories. he did not cry about the tag on his shirt. i remember reading it and saying to myself: i am wrong, and broken, but it isn't in this way. something else is wrong with me instead. later, in that same person-first education class, my teacher would bring up the curious incident and mention that it is now widely panned as being inaccurate and stereotypical. she frowned and said we might not know how a person with autism thinks, but it is unlikely to be expressed in that way. this book was written with the best intentions by a special-ed teacher, but there's some debate as to if somebody who was on the spectrum would be even able to write something like this.

we might not understand it, but crows and ravens have developed their own language. this is also true of whales, dolphins, and many other species. i do not know how a crow thinks, but we do know they can problem solve. (is "thinking" equal to "problem solving"? or is "thinking" data processing? data management?) i do not know how my dog thinks, either, but we "talk" all the same - i know what he is asking for, even if he only asks once.

i am not a dolphin or reindeer or a dog in the nighttime, but i am an odd duck. in the ugly duckling, she grows up and comes home and is beautiful and finds her soulmate. all that ugliness she experienced lives in downy feathers inside of her, staining everything a muted grey. she is beautiful eventually, though, so she is loved. they do not want to cut her open to see how she thinks.

a while ago i got into an argument with a classmate about that weird sia music video about autism. my classmate said she thought it was good to raise awareness. i told her they should have just hired someone else to do it. she said it's not fair to an autistic person to expect them to be able to handle that kind of a thing.

today i saw a goose, and he was limping. i want to be loved like a flock loves a wounded creature: the phrase taken under a wing. which is to say i have always known i am not normal. desperate, mewling - i want to be loved beyond words.

loved beyond thinking.

[chloesimaginationthings]

scooped michael afton gives me gender envy . i need his gender Now.

Michael Afton, the epitome of gender

[ariadne-mouse]

Time to get emotional about the lighting of the beacons

also props to the many folks in that chain whose job it is to hang out in the cold by a massive pile of firewood they can't use

[dolleriumfluffle]

I just desperately want more recognition of traumagenic experiences that lie outside of the usual "childhood abuse" assumption that everyone forces on that label. what about trauma from bullying? what about trauma from undiagnosed illnesses? what about trauma from queer experiences like transphobia? what about trauma from medical experiences like surgeries, hospitalizations, psych wards, and other areas where the medical field failed you? what about trauma from eating disorders? what about trauma from racism?

there are so many experiences that can fall under traumagenic, but are yet swept under a rug in favor of a strict, stereotypical narrative that's easier to comprehend. I think we as a community need to make an active effort to expand our understanding of traumagenic, especially where it may overlap with experiences traditionally considered endogenic, and understand that trauma can come in so many different forms. so often people are shunned for trying to create roles and labels that describe their specific traumagenic experiences, and I don't understand why. there can be no progress towards acceptance for all systems if we don't accept that traumagenic is an umbrella label too.

[shima-draws]

Hey. Hey you know what would be cool and fun. First post of 2024. 1000 notes. We can do it. Yeah? Yeah??

Take a picture of my dog as an incentive

[genderkoolaid]

once again i am BEGGING y'all to stop saying "women and people who can/have [x]" just to soothe cis women who think that gender neutral language is a personal attack. menstruation is gender neutral pregnancy is gender neutral AND GUESS WHAT! you can talk about misogyny and the effects womanhood has socially on these issues WHILE using gender neutral language! ik ive been saying this a lot lately but seriously identifying as a woman is not as crucial to feminism as y'all clearly think it is. it's a spit in the face to trans women and plays into this need for cis women to make sure they are never ever grouped in with the trannies in the horrid dehumanizing label of "people" because they find it defemminating

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Danse Macabre

[Commission]

[elizakai]

DTIYS💫

ashes to ashes </3

(also, click for…better quality💔i hate you tumblr/hj)

✨✨thank you for 1.7k!!!✨✨ (i’ve missed a few milestones ahem)

you all know the drill, rules/prizes/details under the cut if you’re interested ⬇️ ⬇️ ⬇️🌸

Drawing: feel free to keep OR change the pose, bg, moths, colors etc!!! free range as long as he’s got moths (3

Deadline: July 7th!! (i’m open to extensions if you and up needing, dw)

anyone is free to participate after as well, july 7th is just for prize qualifications <3

Mediums: all art forms are great!! :D digital, traditional, mediums such as clay or crochet, whatever your thing is!

this obviously does not include anything AI generated, and please no tracing or stealing art!

(additionally gacha etc won’t count towards qualifying for prizes💕)

TAG: mothdustdtiys (ik,creative)

PLEASE ALSO @ ME i want to make sure i see it💔

PRIZES:

(i’m bad at these i’m willing to negotiate almost all of these but uh)

1st- up to three characters

2nd- up to two characters

3rd- one character of your choosing

depending on how many participants there are there will probably be honorable mention doodles involved :))

THANKS FOR READING AND I HOPE TO SEE YOU ARTIST CREATURES AROUND🌸💫

Anyone can participate whether you have been around already or just see this floating around the void space!!!

HAVE FUN and…thank you so much to everyone for the support. :)) <3

p.s. moment of silence for my black markers,💔💔💔

OH P.P.S, here’s just the general drawing before it got assaulted with colors, in case a more clear look is helpful/needed/wanted(?) !!! <3

[kimtaegis]

LILACS BY THE SEA a music collection curated for @cordiallyfuturedwight Lilacs (Kayla) Playlist • Sea (Seokjin) Playlist song notes

cr. mahoneysuga, rawpixel, bts-trans, Diana Zviedrienė

[libraford]

My dad is going through grandmas old photos that she swore one day she'd organize but never did, and he tells me that hes only keeping 'the important ones.'

"The picture of me n' John n' tim n' michael. And your grandpa and the like. I'm not keeping pictures of cats or the ones of where Grandpa saw a buffalo once."

And listen I am rarely mad at my dad because hes got the best of intentions but...

When I was hlgoing through my other grandmas photos in 2021, I kept EVERY picture of a cat or dog and do you want to know why?

It was 1918, cameras were a luxury to have, film was expensive to develop, and you didnt want to waste film on something pointless and they

STILL

Took pictures of their pets.

"I have a cat. Please let me show you my cat" is a human quality that transcends generations. Before photos, we painted portraits of our companion animals on various surfaces and we will continue to do this til the end of time.

Great great great aunt Ida wanted you to know she had a fluffy little white cat with little black spots and a little black mustache and I think we should hear her out.

[haunted-xander]

It's Riku! Riku's here!

[farannir]

evermore (2020) lyrics that punched me in the gut and/or embraced me in the warmest of hugs

[logicalbookthief]

Wait. So it’s Rei who owns the apartment. Kazuki is crashing there indefinitely, and he does all the shopping, cooking, and cleaning?

He is never beating the malewife allegations.

[uppoompat]

genuinely don’t understand how people can see the way fang looks at tan and HAS been looking at tan since the first time they interacted and still have the audacity to say fang doesn’t like or doesn’t show interest in tan… like are we seeing the same character????

you’re telling me he doesn’t like tan?????