#we're all neurodivergent and obsessed together

[wren-of-the-woods]

There me be relatively few of us The Amazing Devil fans, but what we lack in numbers we make up in sheer, unhinged enthusiasm.

[boringkate]

I watched Lena Dunham's Sharp Stick (2022) with a babe last month. Which I absolutely loved!!!

It's never explicitly acknowledged, but the main character is clearly supposed to be (despite the producers claiming otherwise) in some way neurodivergent. Or something. She's meek and impossibly sexually naive (to the point where me and the girl I watched it with had initially assumed the character was intended to be a child). Apparently they had approached an autism sexuality advocate to work as a consultant for the film before backpeddling.

Trans girls tend to be autistic.

The main character also had a hysterectomy (as did Lena Dunham).

Trans girls tend to be infertile.

She's shown taking estrogen.

Trans girls tend to take estrogen.

She becomes obsessed with porn and begins having one night stands with random men from the internet in hopes of finding validation by proving her sexual desirability.

Trans girls tend to do that shit.

It ends with her realizing and leaning into her impregnation fetish (while getting fucked by the one black guy she knows who had just brought over some 40s and called them homies and also while her black step sister's hands unexpectedly drift in from off screen to hold her because even when she managed to push it off to the last second Lena Dunham is incapable of being chill and normal about race).

Trans girls can't go ten seconds without making the same joke about how if you don't think you can get a trans girl pregnant then you just aren't trying hard enough (and the frequent fetishization of black men in trans and especially neighboring sissy communities can't really be denied).

Also the bartender is played by Tommy Dorfman (a trans woman) with it being her first time playing a character with a girl name.

But I'm not trying to suggest it's intentionally a movie about the tgirl excperience. That would be silly. Really the takeaway should be that (no matter how varied women's lives may be) we (trans women and cis women etc) can still always find common ground and shared excperiences. We're all in this together.

But anyways I was looking at Lena Dunham's Instagram yesterday (I've been off and on again rewatching Girls, so she's stayed on my mind).

One post features the music video she directed starring famed trans girl Hari Nef.

Another post shows that she recently read trans boy Elliot Paige's memoir Paige Boy.

Another post shows a conversation she had with Jon Bernthal (on his podcast) where she explains the word cis to him and talks about having also explained it to her husband (this is the only clip from her appearance on the podcast that she chose to post).

BTW did you know that she was an executive producer for the 2021 show Genera+ion (which I recall featuring a trans boy actor playing a cis boy character who gets a girl pregnant).

Fascinating!

Meanwhile. Ten years earlier. In 2013 (a year into my transition and a year before Time declared that we've reached the trans tipping point) an episode of Girls features a doorman telling one of the titular Girls that "a tranny walked in last time and he was just walking around the floors, but it was nothing." (lmao)

UPDATE: s05e02 features a "did you just assume my pronouns" bit. (in a way that felt reactionary and gross because the theyfab saying it was an absurd hipster barista that the audience isn't intended to sympathize with)

UPDATE UPDATE: s06e02 features the leader of a group for women entrepreneurs saying "For those of you asking on our Facebook if the group is open to trans women: The answer is: We don't know. Okay?" (which I thought was fun)

UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE: s06e03 (the literal next episode) "I even went to a couple of hookers and one of them had a dick."

[tobiasdrake]

Obsessed with what it means to be a follower of Junko's ideology of despair. Like. We all know and understand what despair is as a feeling. But. What is despair as an ideological driving force? What does it mean to create a world of despair - like, on the macro scale?

What is the culture of Ultimate Despair as a global movement?

"What is despair as an ideology?" is an incredibly complicated question to answer. So much so that Junko 2.0 herself, Monaca Towa, got twisted up in confused knots trying to answer it and wound up ragequitting the whole thing.

Because at the end of the day, trying to pin a legitimate philosophy to Ultimate Despair may well be an effort in futility. It's an attempt to interpret a consistent and credible belief system out of the impulsive ramblings of a self-destructive neurodivergent teenager chasing the most extreme possible stims. Ultimate Despair as an ideology defies rationality by design.

What does Despair with a capital D mean? I dunno. What does it mean to you?

Culturally, I think Ultimate Despair would be an onion. It would have a lot in common with other kinds of cults; There'd be layers to it. Various depths to descend into when you're ready for the next step of radicalization.

On the surface, the outermost layer of the onion, you have the recruitment and enabling layer. This is where everyone begins their journey into despair. The layer that takes you in and tells you it's okay. It's okay to be yourself. You don't have to pretend. We're not going to judge you. You can find a home here.

This is where recruitment begins, as vulnerable people are given a support network and social structure with one hand, while being fed rhetoric with the other.

On the next layer down, you'd have nihilistic vice indulgence. Nothing matters, there are no rules, so go ahead and do whatever you want. You want to eat the entire pizza? Gamble your savings away? Stab your asshole neighbor in the throat with a fork? You go do that thing. I believe in you.

The second layer is freedom from social consequence. It's where you're taught to stop trying. Stop trying to be better. Stop hoping for a better world. Just give up and indulge your base desires. Despair can be a force for empowerment. Just live in your feelings and do. It doesn't matter what.

At the third layer, you begin to understand what the others are talking about when they say hope is not the enemy of despair, but the fuel for it. It sounded like gibberish before. But you've been listening to podcasts and talking to other members and it's starting to settle in.

You're starting to look forward to things. Foolish, pointless, unnecessary things just to set yourself up for failure. You're playing tricks on other members, inventing lies to get them excited so they can feel the sting of disappointment right alongside you.

Rather than a means to the end of enjoying things, enjoying things is becoming a means to the end of experiencing despair. You're starting to play a trick on your own mind, reframing the hurt and disappointment as enjoyable. You're falling in love with being as miserable as the rest of your community, so you can all commiserate together.

You're learning to wear your misery as a badge of honor.

The fourth layer would then be self-harm. Once people become convinced that despair is empowering then the next step down is the active pursuit of despair. Emotions you depend on can become very addictive. This stage is where trauma becomes a drug.

This stage uses trauma as a ritual of group investment, the way other cults use toxic machismo or financial investment or acts of devotion to their cause. Break your childhood mementos. Shoot your dog. Stab yourself in the gut. Kill your parents. Post pictures of it online and tell your tale so all your bros know how epic of a true despair sufferer you are.

On the upper layers of the onion, they'll assure you that these guys aren't a real thing. Critics of the movement are blowing things out of proportion. But you hit this point and there's nothing better than the rush you get when you find a new form of despair to put on yourself, and everyone else gets to watch you do it and go, "Whoa, I want to get traumatized THAT hard!"

But. Once you've burned all your stuff and killed everyone you love, where do you go from there?

The fifth and final layer is where you receive your mission. You've chased group participation to its farthest possible extreme and nothing means anything anymore. You've desensitized yourself to the world so much that you've become numb to the idea of anything truly mattering. All you have left in front of you is to die for the cause. That's the only purpose your life even has anymore.

You're ready to put on a Monokuma mask and go deface the Statue of Liberty or blow up New York or something. Whatever the leadership structure of Ultimate Despair, which has been largely silent up until this point and allowed the community itself to mold you, now needs from you. You came into this to escape from the burdens of society and now you're ready to become a soldier.

And if they don't give you a mission then you'll devise one on your own. Your final hope is that you'll be remembered as a hero of the cause. Like all other hopes, it is a lie.

[queerly-autistic]

So much of what I've seen fandom-wise re. S2 of OFMD has been negative, so I wanted to talk about something really lovely.

I have this group of friends. We've been friends for going on thirteen years. We met in a small fandom, and now we have a little group chat where we who talk every day. We've drifted in and out of different fandoms, some of us in them, some of us not, but we're basically friends who found each other through fandom. They're my best friends, and a huge source of friendship and support.

Anyway, we all saw S1 of OFMD. I was way more into it than most of them, and was, I think, the only one who'd loved it enough to vaguely dip my toes into fandom. We set up a little side chat for S2, just in case some people wanted to talk before others had seen it, but it wasn't a big thing. I was off analysing the trailers frame by frame, and counting down the days, but my friends weren't doing that. At that point, it was a 'oh yes, I like this show', but not much more than that.

Folks, S2 absolutely converted my friends to this silly little show.

They became as obsessed as I was. That group chat turned into people yelling excitedly at each other at three in the morning because we were too excited about the show to sleep, sharing gifs and screenshots, shared weeping over fanvids, linking each other to fanfiction, going into extraordinarily detailed meta and analysis about tiny little moments, bouncing off each other to build these delightful group headcanons about what might happen to Ed and Stede as innkeepers, and just generally loudly loving this show together.

A couple of us met up and we binged episodes together. One came to MCM with me to meet some of the cast (and we had the BEST time). Some of us are planning to get OFMD tattoos together.

I want to reiterate - season two did this.

Season two pulled my friends from casual fans to absolutely obsessed. Season two gave me this amazing new connection with friends I already adored, to be fannish and squeeing together and all the joy that fandom brings. Season two inspired this outpouring of love and shared hyperfixation that is, at times, one of the main things getting me through.

Watching season two with these people, and watching them fall head over the heels for the show, and getting to experience that with them, is one of the best things that's happened to me in a long time. Season two spoke to this little group of queers and neurodivergents and filled our hearts with what we needed.

I genuinely can't put into words how special this show is to me, and how much this season in particular has meant to me. I glow when I think about it. It wraps me in warmth and love. My world feels better for its existence. And isn't that just everything.

[aita-blorbos]

Am I The Asshole for not telling my QPP that I (sort of) came back from the dead?

My Queer Platonic Partner (4595 M), who I'll call F, and I (~300k M) got together in the late eleventh century, and we've basically been married since the sixteenth century. (Not legally, obviously, but we lived together and pooled our finances and all that.)

While doing some spy work in France during WWII (on behalf of the Allies) I got another future vision showing me getting killed by this cult of weird supernatural obsessed rich people, and I could tell it would happen sometime in the next year or so. Now, there are ways to shift small details of the stuff I see in my future visions, but I'm pretty sure trying to change anything too major would break the fabric of spacetime, if you could even manage to make a change in the first place, so I accepted pretty quickly that my demise was inevitable and started making preparations (writing a will, etc.)

Obviously after all this time I know F pretty well, and he tends to struggle dealing with grief; most of his friends are other immortals and he only really interacts with mortals professionally. I also know there would be absolutely no way he would just accept the fact that my death is inevitable, and would end up spending the next however-long-I-had-left trying to find a solution and would probably really beat himself up about it when he failed.

On top of that, telling other people too much about my visions tends to lead to bad stuff happening (like an immortal cult leader/dictator from my home dimension, who we'll call C, massacring 60+ planets, attempting to take over Earth multiple times, and basically turning his kid into a living weapon), so I don't tend to tell people about them, a boundary which F knows about and usually respects.

So basically, I didn't tell F what I saw. I got kidnapped, he tried to rescue me but was a bit too late, I bled out after getting stabbed by a magic sword, etc., etc. Now, when people of my species die, we get reincarnated. We're reborn in an entirely new body, and with our memories suppressed, we grow into entirely new people with entirely new experiences. You keep your magic powers and basically stop aging around 20, but that's about it. It's a bit different for humans for slightly complicated deific political reasons, I think? F knows this because I told him about it at some point.

After I died, the wife (? F) of one of F's old friends showed up and told me she was Death and that C was gonna try to invade Earth again at some point in the future and my help would be needed, so she was willing to let me sort of... stick around in my reincarnation (now 78 NB)'s brain. So obviously I agreed.

My reincarnation, E, was born somewhere in the US shortly after I died. For context, F and I previously lived in the UK. I hung back for most of E's childhood because I wanted to let them live their own life, but I did help them out a few times with bullies and shitty teachers and stuff. (They're queer and neurodivergent and grew up in the 50s, so they didn't exactly have the best childhood).

There wasn't exactly a whole lot I could do to contact F when E was younger, and even when they got older, there still wasn't much I could do without fucking up their life, so basically I spent several decades only showing up when E was asleep or everyone involved was super high, so even E didn't know I existed.

Sometime around the early 80s E started getting into superhero stuff, which isn't really my cup of tea, so I ended up sorta taking a nap for a few decades. I woke up in the mid 2010s to find out that F and E had apparently become friends? Again, I don't want to mess up either of their lives, and it seemed to me like F had moved on, so I continued hiding.

Recently, C started trying to invade earth again, so I started sneaking out at night to try to stop them with the help of R (18 NB/M?), the literal only other person who knew I existed. (He accidentally ran into me getting a late night snack while breaking into E's house for prank reasons. It's a long story.) We ended up running into some other people, including F's dad (4622 F), so eventually a total of like, 4 people knew about my existence. None of them knew I was me, as in F's dead ex QPP/E's past life. Fortunately, I was able to convince everyone not to tell E or F about me.

Fast forward to a couple months ago, C launched a full scale attack on the city where basically everyone involved in this mess lives. I won't go into too many details, but during the attack E ended up getting hit with a "sleeping spell" which basically just knocked them out, leaving me in control of the body by default. My fighting style is pretty different than E's, so F recognized me almost immediately.

We ended up getting into a pretty big argument about me not telling him I was still around, during which I ended up finding out that after I died he basically lost all faith in humanity and tried to destroy the world a couple times, and he basically admitted he still wasn't over my death, but he was also really pissed at me for not telling him that I was still around. I tried to explain but F still insisted I should have told him. We're both fairly stubborn and quick to anger, so the argument ended up getting a bit out of hand, and now we aren't talking to one another. I understand why he's angry, but I still feel like I didn't have any other choice.

Am I The Asshole?

(Side Note: E is now aware I exist and is trying to act as a mediator. They understand my reasoning for not outright telling them, and had a pretty good laugh over all the signs of my existence that they missed, but F is still pissed on their behalf about me not telling them.)

[david-tennant-wearing-things]

Making a pinned post so I look like I know what I'm doing

To be clear, my only qualifications to run this blog are:

I'm obsessed with David Tennant

I have a bit of experience with fashion design and sewing

I need an outlet to talk about DT's clothes before people irl start telling me to shut up

This blog might include actual analyses of his outfits, but I'm not great at writing long posts and I don't actually know enough about fashion to do that much analysis, so it may not 🤷

I'm trying to create a really organized tagging system so we can pretend I'm organized, but I don't actually know how well that will work. We're going to find out. Anyway, tags below the cut:

Disclaimer: I'm very adhd and sometimes I forget tags

I don't update this every time I add a new tag Latest Update: June 28, 2024 Specific Looks:

Good Omens s2 Press Day 2

Evening Standard Theatre Awards 2023

BAFTA 2024 Red Carpet

BAFTA 2024 Kilt

BAFTA 2024 Gold Suit

Red Nose Day 2024

Olivier Awards 2024

British LGBT Awards 2024

Mean Girls Premiere

Pub In The Park Things He Wears Often:

Fluffy Sweaters

Pride Pins

Pride Shirts

Pride (should have all pride and allyship posts)

Peaked Lapels

Converse Characters:

Crowley

Ten; Fourteen; The Doctor Other People:

Georgia Tennant Instagram

Tennant Kids

Michael Sheen

Anna Lundberg Instagram

Billie Piper

Bonnie Langford

Millie Gibson

Ncuti Gatwa Designers:

Joshua Kane

Mithridate

MacGregor and MacDuff

Paul Smith

In the event that I get my act together, this blog might also include some of my own work:

Getting My Act Together And Making Shit

My Act Is Not Together Miscellaneous:

Bark Ruffalo

Wordle

Fanart

Posts that don’t include pictures of David/aren't really about him are tagged #not dt or #not a fashion post (unless I forget)

fun facts that feel relevant: I'm trans, neurodivergent, and disabled. I really want to see queer, adaptive, and adjustable fashion become more mainstream, so this is my small attempt at contributing to that. While also continuing to not shut up about David Tennant.

[khodorkovskaya]

storytime: i caused a divorce

the story starts in 2019... i used to give language lessons when i was in highschool to make some pocket money and found students through facebook groups or specialised websites. when i started uni however i stopped because not only did i not have the time, but i also kinda grew out of it. i had about a dozen students and ive been teaching for 4 years, it was time to move on. so i told my students that i'll no longer be available and stopped looking for new ones. until i got a very peculiar message... little did i know, it was the start of a new friendship.

let's call him lucien for the sake of the story. now how do i even describe him to you guys?

the first time i met him was at his office for a language lesson. and he was devastated because his wife (let's call her sarah) had just left him after 10 years of marriage. she left him for another woman... (and later had a gf who had hpv??? but idk if that's the woman she left him for?) anyway, he was very sad and heartbroken.

lucien is very neurodivergent (huuuge adhd and idk if it's a joke or not but he said he's been diagnosed with schizophrenia?? but again he says random shit all the time so idk). he's somewhere on the ace spectrum and never had sex with sarah. bc (1) he's not interested in sex and (2) she's like 20 years younger than him and he felt uneasy about it. and he's also weirdly rich. i say weirdly because he's not a standard kind of rich person. he has periods where he is literally broke and has to beg sarah for money to buy instant noodles. and he has periods where he makes 6 figures in a week. and when he does have money, he doesn't keep it for very long bc he spends it all on expensive hobbies.

now let me explain his expensive hobbies to you. because he doesn't drink and doesn't do drugs (he used to do lots of drugs back in the 90s, has tried everything and a lot of his friends died from overdose yikes). but he is very passionate about his life. he spends tens of thousands on professional diving school and diving equipment, jumps out of planes for fun (with a custom parachute transported to him from lichtenstein ofc), he has all kinds of gadgets that cost more that tuition at elite american colleges, he used to spend 2k a month just to learn how to ice skate, the list goes on... it's insane. id love to tell you guys more about the guy but i can't reveal too much. but if we're chill and you follow me on insta hmu and i'll show you his profile.

so anyway, over the years we've been thru a lot together. we went to russia together, he paid for shooting lessons for me, he gave me an ak-74 once as a present and uhh yeah that was uh an experience.... when my cousin came over last summer we went for a plane ride together. and this year we've been obsessed with ice skating.

every sunday lucien, sarah, my bestie and i would go to the rink. it was my favourite part of the week! the four of us would have a blast! my bestie and lucien would skate in a pair and sarah would show me different techniques and stuff bc im a beginner skater. it was great! sarah struggles with mental health issues and she's been on and off medication, so she's been depressed and tired all this time and now she was finally looking happier and she'd come ice skating with us every time and we'd chat after skating and get coffee together, me and my bestie loved it!

then when the season came to an end lucien offered to buy me and my bestie ice skates! we couldn't be more excited! he often buys his friends presents and judging by the obscene amounts of money he spends on his hobbies and gadgets, it didn't stand out of the ordinary. the four of us went to a professional shop in lausanne and got ice skates and then we went to a museum and had so much fun, it was great! i was so happy that sarah came too bc lucien was telling me how it was a struggle for her to be on her feet all day bc she usually takes lots of naps bc of medication withdrawal. but she seemed fine and we had lots of fun together!

during the trip i briefly mentioned that i wanted to go to skating summer camp and said to my bestie that i was probably gonna save up some money and go bc it's a lot of fun.

and

the next day

lucien sent me 1000chf to my account with a note saying that it's for the skating camp

i was shocked ofc but decided not to say anything over messages but talk to him about it in person the following day bc we were going skating together (my bestie couldn't come cos she was working and sarah didn't come either). he said that he feels the need to support young people's willingness to do things and it's a great initiative that would be a shame for me to miss if i didn't have the money. and i was like okay that's fair and i asked him if he was coming too. and he said he wanted to make sure with me whether it was okay for him to come too bc he didn't want to be creepy. and we agreed that we'll all go together, me, lucien, sarah, and if my bestie isn't working that week we could maybe get her to come along too. he said that if it's only young people and women there, he will sleep at a hotel or at his parents' place (bc his parents have a villa in that region) to not make everyone uncomfortable. we were v excited and i was looking forward to going skating with the usual crew!

and this morning guess what! i receive a message from sarah on our family business email address (so my parents received it too), reading the following:

"id like to inform you that i find lucien's sponsoring of you unhealthy and it's turning into financial domination.

because of that, starting today i have launched a definitive divorce procedure because i don't want to be part of this triangle anymore.

kind regards,

sarah"

ooooo the drama! who could've expected that!!?? and to my parents' email too? good lord!

disclaimer, im not a fake mental health advocate at all and i support all mentally ill women, especially those who display mental illness symptoms! whether you're an alcoholic and it's not a pretty sight or whether your mental health is causing you to act out messy or whatever, i will always be on your side and i will never call you "crazy" or blame you no matter what! i will defend mentally ill women till the end!

so im on sarah's side on this 100%! idk what lucien has told her and she knows him better than i (or my bestie) do. but for me it was clear that we were ALL going to skating camp. if it was for me only i wouldn't have accepted bc yeah that's weird. and lucien, no matter his neurodivergence, has full responsibility of how he spends his money. so idk what went down behind the scenes. maybe he didn't tell her and she just saw that he sent me 1k from his bank account?? whatever it is, lucien better figure shit out bc sarah has been dealing with too much already. she's sacrificed so much for him! and she can do so much better, no offence to lucien ofc, but she's drop dead gorgeous and an amazing person! im rooting for her!

and do i think she will go thru with the divorce? probably not. she's been "threatening" with divorce for a while now and i think that possibly she was having an episode or something when she sent the email. my stepmum does these kind of things. like she'll be normal and then she'll be manic and write weird emails to my mum and call her a whore and stuff. so receiving this email gave me flashbacks and tbh i can't take it seriously.

but i hope our skating group will make it out of this incident just fine. and i still really want to go to skating camp with everyone :(((

im seeing lucien tomorrow so i'll keep you guys updated!

[cravatsandbonnets]

Putting it here instead of vague tweeting, because I HAVE THOUGHTS.

OFMD Twitter fandom, we are fucked up. And yes, all fandoms are fucked up to some degree and have their petty infighting and squabbles over characters and ships. THAT DOESN'T MAKE IT OK. like, jesus fucking christ on a pogo stick, please get some perspective of the "these are fictional people but you, a real life human, are making choices that affect and hurt other humans" kind.

I think some of this speed run through fandom drama (I mean we're getting into stuff the spn folks didn't get to until year 4 or 5!) is that the proportion of folks in the Twitter fandom specifically for whom this is their first fandom is pretty high. And it's intense when you get into this kind of community for the first time, yeah? All these people who are pretty well obsessed with the same thing you are, who will listen to you talk about and not roll their eyes and sigh and judge you for this thing that has taken over your brain and your life. It's beautiful and joyful and so much fun -- and then you run into someone with what you think is a ridiculous take on a character or plotline, someone is mean about a character you like, runs down a fanfic you love, insults your favorite actor, like, what is happening? Aren't we here because we all live the show?

And then there's the fact that a clear majority of us are queer. A whole lot of us are neurodivergent in some (maybe more than one) way. Add in the fact that we are operating off of, as of this moment, about 5 hours of canon content that some of us first saw a year ago. The stress about when S2 might air, the lack of acknowledgement from HBOmax and inactivity of the official social media channels, nervous anticipation of an air date announcement and/or trailer, an unprecedented explosion of fanworks, unusual access to cast & crew via twitter & insta, the sheer level of horniness we exhibit...yeah, this is a recipe for disaster. A fandom full of people extra prone to super intense feelings, people who feel excluded, misunderstood, hiding their identities in their daily lives, forming parasocial relationships not just with cast & crew but also other fans, extra protective of their headcanons -- and, let's be real, a bunch of us who are very sensitive to rejection and internalize intense emotional pain, assuming the worst, jumping to conclusions, lashing out -- which can lead to taking those feelings public, attacking or hardly criticizing an individual or group in a public tweet or tumblr post or facebook comment. Which is then screenshotted and retweeted and spread around, and we and up with the dreaded Discourse.

I just think that we desperately need a S2 announcement & trailer to dissect so we can stop turning on each other, yeah? We need content and distraction and something to all be excited and happy about together.

[ladyimaginarium]

yknow what, to add onto this blog being multipurpose ( a mixture between personal, rpc, vent, queerness, alterhumanity, plurality, indigeneity & occultism, among other things!! ), I'll& be using this as an academia / writeblr / langblr / studyblr / studyplace blog, too, especially considering that is a big step for me& considering I& dropped out of college a few years ago due to mental health reasons, so I'll& be taking a mental health class, the Be There Certificate under the Born This Way Foundation which was founded by the queen Lady Gaga herself, hopefully in the future taking online free yeshiva classes & I'm& also taking free university classes bc we stan indigenous students in quote on quote "higher education" striving for education in post-secondary educational institutions that were never created for us in mind, particularly because so often academia is inaccessible to natives, especially disabled & neurodivergent natives !! we're building nations & the revolution will be indigenized !!

with that said, though, as much as we& love the academia aesthetic, imma& just say this now. to anybody who's an academic who ends up looking here: do NOT come here expecting to only see a bunch of content exclusively related to staple white academia movies & poets & writers & philosophers like william shakespeare, edgar allan poe, h.p lovecraft, j.r.r. tolkien, jane austen, sylvia plath, oscar wilde, sappho, etc. or studying van gogh's art or learning latin or listening to mozart, vivaldi or tchaikovsky, particularly where cis white men ( & sometimes cis white women ) are idolized uncritically, which isn't to say that there won't be any european works being studied here nor that they don't have their place at all bc ofc they do, it's just that i& see this so often & because of that we& intend to incorporate international world history & world literature into our& decolonized curriculum. only studying white european cultures doesn't make you an academic, bc academia, music, art, architecture & literature have existed for millennia all around the world outside of europe. you also won't be seeing any glorification of parts of the aesthetic with roots in the obsession over white/pale skin, ivy league & old money worship, the glorification of the 1%, putting cis white academics & oftentimes white eurocentric academia on a pedestal while blatantly ignoring other underrepresented cultures ( & even when poc are represented it's primarily east asian i.e han chinese, yamato japanese or korean or generally lightskinned aesthetics ), antiblack racism, antinative racism, antisemitism, islamophobia, sexism, homophobia, transphobia, queerphobia, classism, ableism, sanism, oppression & discrimination.

it's also important to note that in our& academic studies we& will be using etuaptmumk which literally translates to two-eyed seeing in mi'kmawi'simk which essentially means learning to see from one eye with the strengths of indigenous knowledges & ways of knowing, & from the other eye with the strengths of western knowledges & ways of knowing & learning to use both these eyes together, for the benefit of all, as envisaged by elder dr. albert marshall.

here's a preview of our& studies so far, with some of our& names being censored for system safety reasons:

[a-darling-thing]

My clueless, gay ass suddenly putting all the pieces together re: the few male crushes and relationships past me had down through the years: 1) Fictional characters (often neurodivergent and female and/or queer coded)

2) That queer, male 19 year old graphic designer with the undercut who didn't know I was alive when I was 14 (I got the same haircut a year later).

3) The cute, innocent, and super shy ginger boy in bible college who started dating my good friend like two days after I decided I had a crush on him (they were super cute, meant for each other, and I wished them nothing but the best, but the point is he was unavailable and I pretty much knew it).

4) The soft, nerdy guy from bible college who also didn't know I was alive, 'cause I just obsessed and pined silently over him.

5) The nice, super tall 'straight' guy in university, who spent all of our time together, talking about his relationship issues with his gay roommate.

6) My soon to be ex-husband (we're still friends) who I met on the internet, started a long-distance relationship with after three days of chatting, and only met in-person two times before we got married and spent an 17-year long, mostly platonic and emotionally unavailable marriage with.

[wellsandwongdetectivesociety]

MMU for the send me a fandom ask game?

!! Wonderful!

The first character I ever fell in love with: Daisy Wells, there was just something so perfectly alike to me in her that I became obsessed.

A character that I used to love/like, but now do not: I used to like Stephen when I first read AFT when I was about ten/eleven! What is possibly ten rereads later, and a lot of conversations on the discord, I now hate him!

A ship that I used to love/like, but now do not: Daisy and Hazel! I used to think that shipping them was the only way to make them together and dedicated to each other, but since realising that I'm aroace and coming out, I tend to write them as a QPR and that makes me so much happier! The same goes for Alexander and George.

My ultimate favourite character™: Daisy Wells but also May Wong. When Robin Stevens returns to the internet, I may send her an email asking if she intentionally wrote May as austistic, because I stim SO MUCH whenever I read The Case of the Deadly Flat because it's absolutely perfect and I adore her so much.

Prettiest character: I think this means in terms of appearance, so probably Amina! She's described so beautifully, I think we were honestly robbed for not seeing her described through Daisy's eyes at any point.

My most hated character: I hate Miss Griffin SO MUCH, @imawake-butatwhatcost has talked so much about how disturbing she is that I can't believe I didn't see it before.

My OTP: Daisy and Hazel as a QPR!! Romantic OTP is definitely Halex, they're unbelievably sweet.

My NOTP: Daisy and Hazel romantically.

Favourite episode (I'm taking this as short story): The Hound of Weston School or The Case of the Deadly Flat, they're all so BRILLIANT.

Saddest death: I'm choosing to interpret this as the victim I was the saddest about, so Su Li in ASOM.

Favourite season (book): Death In The Spotlight! As a neurodivergent theatre queer, it ticks all my boxes.

Least favourite season (book): Probably JFP - JFP is absolutely wonderful, but it's the one I've reread the least because the fall out stresses me out so much. But I think it's an amazing book, I adore the entire series.

Character that everyone else in the fandom loves, but I hate: I don't think I have one! We're mostly on the same page in the fandom, at least on the discord.

My ‘you’re piece of trash, but you’re still a fave’ fave: I don't know about piece of trash, but Daniel Miller! I think he's underrated and a fascinating study.

My ‘beautiful cinnamon roll who deserves better than this’ fave: Hazel Wong. She needs a holiday that nobody is murdered on.

My ‘this ship is wrong, nasty, and makes me want to cleanse my soul, but I still love it’ ship: I write Stephen/Bertie but that's to show how shit I reckon their relationship was in contrast to Harold/Bertie, I don't actually love it.

My ‘they’re kind of cute, and I lowkey ship them, but I'm not too invested’ ship: George and Lavinia! I prefer them as a QPR!

[life-rewritten]

Hi 👋

Oh, as if my profile picture wasn’t obvious already! 🤣 No, but I really like the DanYok dynamics. I can’t exactly say why: maybe it’s because of the strangers element, or perhaps it’s because I liked Fluke Gawin already a lot in DBK and I’m curious what he’ll bring to the table. I think out of the three ships, DanYok might be the most surprising to see pan out. (Not the fact THAT it’ll happen, but HOW it will come about.) That being said, it’s my toxic trait to heavily root for the most minor, least likely ship in a show, in order to be disappointed afterwards that nothing really happened. 🤡 (Yes, I briefly was a strong WaiKorn shipper. 😳) So I hope I won’t put too much hope into this.

As for which ship I feel the most certain about, that would have to be SeanWhite, mainly because their psychosocial interactions are just so strong. (Ugh, me being wordy again: what I’m trying to say is that they don’t just exchange a lot of words and emotions –by nearly killing each other for example 🥲– but also a lot of feelings and experiences – things that aren’t said out loud, which in the end will make them richer than the other in that they not only “merge” romantic feelings but also standpoints/ ideologies/ visions on life -> which are the things that will hopefully rub off on the audience the most. Which is the main reason why I watch this show i the first place. Not to primarily consume the political aspects of the show, but to see how those aspects are conveyed through the dynamics of story and its characters, which creates a synthesis of the same problems from different povs. How those characters present their own views and experiences, but at the same time “discover” different ways of looking at the world around through this, as does –by extension– the viewer.

And we discussed GramBlack already a bit. I predict (but what do I know lmao 🤷‍♀️) that this ship will be the richest in terms of symbolism and visual aspects. Varying from the Black-White dichotomy ☯️ to the childhood toys and the motorcycle. And even though I’m originally an English lit major, I’m an absolute sucker for imagery (symbolism, metaphors, metonymy, allegory, simile) in books, but in also in television. It shouldn’t be too in the nose, but gosh, it can enrich a storyline so much if they do. And my neurodivergent brain just loooves the details! 😍

I will be on the lookout for more significant details! 🧐

Love,

— Thel. 💚

Hi again :)

I also was a WaiKorn shipper so I get you. I actually think GramBlack is the least likely because there were no hints shown a lot about them. But I think you're allowed to put hope in YokDan because this show isn't just about the realities of activism, it's still a BL/Queer piece, it's going to still target the BL audience and give the couples all growth and a happy ending or open ending. Because Nuchy has made YokDan very different from what they are in the book, I think they will get one too. But I'm always optimistic and tbh the trust I have in this show terrifies me, but here we are.

Yes I agree with SeanWhite, I honestly think they will end up getting more love by the time they switch to full romantic, right now they have to overcome so many obstacles but once they do that passion they have will be just as loud as the other couples. They already act obsessed and lost in each other, it's mostly about them in their perspectives, so yeh we're gonna see more of them and be even more certain of their chemistry and passion which will make the show amp the BL aspects and add the ideologies and activism as well to the center of the narrative when they have to finally defeat Tawi and find out who hurt Black. Everything will merge together, the romance, the message, and the narrative will all join to form a big explosion of feelings. And I can't wait.

As you know by now with me I am also obsessed with imagery, symbolism, metaphors, metonymy, allegory, simile, and literature devices being used in media. So this show has me hooked and obsessed. Like the fact I can write 10,000 words on just the way the characters are written and the purpose and effort put into that is insane but here am I happy that this show proved what I thought it could do. I am very pleased with all the couples of this show and I am stunned at the whole production and team behind it.

Let me know what you think of the YokDan essay then since they're your favorite, I think they're so great and I can't wait to see how they tackle both Sean's hate for cops, and also just Dan letting himself join the gang and trust them. Let me know if you noticed anything else in the show because I love seeing your perspective and hearing from you :)

<3

[aeirs-moved]

anyway on the topic of sports anime the dna chapter this week was so good im still thinking about it. like because its done in the perspective of sawamura if you watch the show with your brain turned off and/or if youre a sick evil fuck, you can end up hating furuya but this chapter really shows furuya's appreciation for both his rivalry with sawamura as they grow together throughout the years and furuya's appreciation for the team like its just so well done and i do hope that some furuya haters are converted by this because hes a really interesing character not only as a narrative force but as like. a character. he is so awesome and i love him Also i AM biased as a neurodivergent person who comes from an area with harsh winters BUT! he is just so good i love when characters are reserved but idiots like hes just so funny especially when sawamura and him are goofing off together its so cute. but yes as far as the anime has gotten like i feel like you either have to be obsessed with it or like furuya in the first place to like him much. i mean there is scenes especially in act 2 where he and sawamura are buds but like as far as the lowest common denominator of sports anime go like if you scroll down to the crunchyroll comments in s2 its all i hate furuya furuya makes me so mad wheres sawamura like go die seriously furuya is so awesome. and like in some ways i understand it because in the match "we're" in right now like the latest one in act ii like im getting anxious for sawamura to come out because i miss my guy. BUT also theres so much symbolic value in having a pitcher relay type thing against This Team in particular. in conclusion. furuya :)

[modgirlyreposts-revamped]

Random incorrect quotes for my Fazbear Frights Broken Reality AU (all of the protags and their friends and shit band together to try to figure out why they're stuck in this, like, hell world, and find out that they're all figments of Cassidy's imagination and their torturous fates are manifestations of his vengeance)

Cassidy, talking to the protagonists' crew: Don't you understand? You're imaginary! I created you to kill you! So why can't you just stay down and die with dignity?!

Oswald, VERY confidently: We don't do anything with dignity!!

Angel: ....come again?

Dylan: No, he's right.

-

Devon, to Sarah: Do you honestly ever shut up about Millie?! It's always "where's Millie?" "I can't, I'm hanging out with Millie" "I'm so worried about MILLIE" and she's always FIVE FUCKIN' FEET AWAY FROM YOU! It's pathetic.

-

Millie, to Cassidy: You're talking a lot of shit for a bitch in punting range.

Sarah: Millie, please, he's eight. Do Not punt the 8 year old. Or call him a bitch.

Sarah: Upon further consideration, maybe you just shouldn't be around kids.

-

Brooke: Oh, look, it's the goop monster made out of my organs and teeth and desperation to be worthwhile. Hello goop monster, how's my life treating you?

Faz-goo Brooke: *incoherent gurgling and growls*

Brooke: Well, good to hear from ya, buddy! You, uh, you have fun with that. (Under her breath) fucking freak.

-

Hazel, playing with her "Lonely Freddy toy": What do you want to do today, Freddy?

Alec, desperately trying to reach out to her: PLEASE HELP ME HAZEL I CAN'T TAKE THIS ANYMORE PLEASE LET ME OUT I'M SORRY PLEASE-

Hazel, only hearing little squeaks from it: Haha! Meep meep indeed, little buddy! Meep meep!

-

Hazel, talking to a Freddy Fazbear employee: So I got a Lonely Freddy from you guys a while ago, and when I press the button on his tummy he's supposed to sing a song, but he's really broken and now all he says when I press the button is "help" in a weirdly musical tone. Can you fix him?

-

(TW: cannibalism mention)

Oswald: Truth or dare time! What's the worst thing you've ever done? O accidentally let a child murderer take over my dad's life for like a week. What about you guys?

Dylan: I periodically run away from home.

Millie: I was an ass to my family for a long time.

Sarah: I ditched my only friend because I was so obsessed with beauty.

Alec: I hurt my totally innocent little sister because I was angry at our parents.

Cassidy: Killed an innocent man in cold blood.

Angel: Ate my sister.

Brooke: Well that went from 1 to 100 real quick.

(Gumdrop angel is different in this AU it's a whole thing)

-

Cassidy, getting discovered by the Fazbear Frights characters: Don't think I can neurodivergent minor my way out of this one folks

-

Andrew: So, what, am I like a self insert then?

Cassidy: You and Jake, yeah. And a little bit Hazel and Alec, Ophelia, Kelsey, Millie, even Oswald to an extent, and Ella, the Friendly Face a little bit, believe it or not, the kid with the Tag Along Freddy, Angel, the way her story was supposed to go, the kid who died under the ticket machine, the one who disappeared at the pizza factory and her friend, the one who died in Hide and Seek, Shadow Bonnie, there's a bit of me everywhere, but really you're my biggest "self insert" character.

Andrew: BUT YOU COULDN'T EVEN MAKE ME A MARY SUE?! >:(

-

Cassidy: You know, for learning that you're not real, you guys are taking it quite well.

Kelsey: I mean, we're still real enough that we can feel and live. And change our stories, even. It's not as groundbreaking as you'd imagine.

Sarah: No, no, you guys are thinking about this all wrong. If we're fictional, does that mean we have a fandom? Are people writing fanfic about us?

Brooke: Do people ship us? Do they write weird horny ship fanfic about us??

Dylan: I wonder if there's horny fanfic of Funtime Freddy and Millie's grandpa-

Millie: *Agonized screaming*

Cassidy: (just silently watches, doesn't have the heart to remind them that they're only in his imagination and he's the only one observing them)

MILLIE ABOUT TO PUNT CASSIDY, YEAH SHE SHOULDN'T BE AROUND KIDS GHJFSKHFJKADSAF-

AND CASSIDY TRYING TO "NEURODIVERGENT MINOR" HIS WAY OUT OF EXPLAINING HGDJKDGJSKG-

I am scared of whatever made Dylan even consider the idea that someone me wrote horny fanfics of Funtime Freddy and Millie's grandpa

[rambler-of-procrastination]

answer all my mutual…ᘛ⁐̤ᕐᐷ

if you have a lighter, what color is it? blue i think

pepsi box blue or cheetos bag orange? both

do you like pasta? yes

how often are you on tumblr? too often

are you only doing this because you’re bored? eh kinda im also like really hyper rn and yeah putting energy towards this

what blogs do you mostly interact with? idk mutuals

can you swim? yes

have you had water today? since its 8am no been up since 530

which do you prefer, cotton candy or funnel cake? uhh. craving funnel cake rn but both good

have you ever [insert question]? forgot to ask the question feel free to or not your choice

bass or drums? to play? i cant.

favorite tv commercial? no clue

can we be friends? we're mutuals eric-

do you admire the clouds and color of the sky? do you like the colour of the sky? yes i do

what’s the weirdest thing that’s happened to you? i genuinely have no clue

a netflix series that’s your favorite? atypical

an earliest obsession you remember? rocks

do you play video games? ye

zombies or vampires? im a vampire @satanshairycoochie

have you listened to [insert musician/band]? see 10

your first celebrity crush? uhhh honestly memory sucks so no clue

do you have a collection of cool rocks? kinda. idk where it is

five words that describe you? tired, tired, tired, tired, and music

what have you learned about yourself? im trans and neurodivergent

can you tie a cherry stem with your tongue? no sadly

do you believe in aliens? somethings out there idk what but sure

books or films? films

an unusual song that’s your favorite? shuffled my songs cus i didnt know what else to do for this and got "should i stay or should i go"

the last thing you ate? a piece of shrimp

do you have a favorite [insert question]? see 10

have you gotten bit by a dog? yeah.

do you write better with a pen or a pencil? mechanical pencil, then pen, then "regular" pencils

a song that gets stuck in your head? any song i ever listen to

when you hear “ peace ” what do you think of? my cousin doing the symbol with his hand

a school subject your good with? history

how many alarms do you have set? too many i lost count when i was coutning i tried countless times-

do you shop at thrift stores? eh want to but none are near me

what’s the meaning behind your url? rambler from @thehugwizard and @papa-no-cheese was no-cheese-procrasination

is there wise words you live by? i came up with this or i heard it somewhere unsure but live your life for yourself not someone else

what’s your favorite [insert question]? see 10

you gotta have a favorite beatles song, what is it? idk-

earphones or a speaker? earphones

what do you remember from your childhood? mix of good and bad

do you collect anything? used to

favorite tea? chai or another black tea

a christmas song you secretly like? im gonna kill santa claus

book stores or record stores? book

how weird were these questions? pretty weird ig

what scents do you like? some vanilla and cinnamon together

is there [insert question]? see 10

thank you for the ask :D