#well not exactly them you can change the animals. they were assigned the roles

[docheros]

psst psst irisona friends @geekyfox2 @florenceisfalling (and anyone else who wants to participate). how do you feel about fnaf au

[true-blue-megamind]

FAN THEORY THURSDAY: Megamind’s Connections Beyond the Film

Before we get started, it’s time for the obligatory SPOILER WARNING!  

In case this hasn’t been made sufficiently obvious by the fact that this is a post about Megamind written in a fan theory series about Megamind and published on a blog dedicated solely to Megamind, please let me just assure that this article is, in fact, about Megamind.  

If you haven’t seen the film yet yet, I have to question why you’re reading this in the first place.  As well as your taste in animated movies.  I’m definitely questioning that.

Over the years I’ve heard several fan theories concerning connections between the film Megamind and various other forms of media.  Today, let’s delve into just a few.

The first one is so obvious it’s almost painful, but it has to be mentioned.  Megamind is a Superman spoof.  Metro Man is clearly based on the Man of Steel himself, with a hefty dose of Elvis Presley and a larger range of character flaws thrown in for good measure.  (He also seems to contain quite a lot of the Popular Jock archetype.)  The character of Megamind is more complex still, combining elements of Alice Cooper and a nineties Goth theater kid with several comic book supervillains. The best known of the last include alien genius Brainiac and mad inventor Lexx Luthor, but they aren’t the only ones.  Some of Megamind’s engineering and technological inventions call to mind Spiderman villain Doctor Octopus even more than Lexx Luthor, and he also shares some parallels with the mad inventor Dr. Sivana in the SHAZAM comics.

Megamind’s most notable of the latter is the similarity of attitudes toward society.  Both Megamind and Dr. Sivana started off trying to use their inventions for good—the first in the classroom and the second for the betterment of mankind—but both became bitter when people mocked and shunned them.  For Dr. Sivana, this led to a desire to conquer all of Earth while for Megamind, in a sort of microcosm, it led to a similar drive to take over Metro City.  Both Lexx Luthor and Dr. Sivana have, perhaps, the strongest connections to Megamind as share, deep down, a desire to help or protect mankind, and as Lexx Luthor, like Megamind, harbors a secret love for the reporter damsel in their respective stories.  (This desire to do good, especially in the face of corrupt officials, ties into another Megamind fan theory that I will likely discuss in more detail in a later post.)

The connection between Megamind and Alice Cooper, by the way, was extremely intentional.  The creators stated in an interview that, like Alice Cooper, Megamind’s dark, evil self is, in fact, a stage persona.  (Even their clothing, consisting largely of black leather and spikes, is similar.)  That fact is illustrated in the film as we can see that Megamind’s behaviors on- and off-camera tend to be vastly different.  Even as a villain, he is merely playing a role, although in the case of Megamind that role has begun to merge with his self-identity.

There are, however, hints within the world of DreamWorks that Megamind has other connections as well.  The first is fairly recent and intensely interesting. In the Rise of the Guardians, Jamie Bennett, a young boy who still steadfastly believes in the seemingly impossible, mentions “aliens in Michigan,” only to be scoffed at by his friends.  Because Metro City is located in Michigan, (as can be seen briefly when the Death Ray is fired from space,) many fans theorize that the “aliens in Michigan” are none other than Megamind, Minion, and, perhaps, Metro Man. 

This would indicate that the two stories take place in the same world, and that Megamind’s adventures, while well-known in Metro City itself, have been covered up and kept secret from the rest of the world.  (Imagine moving to a moderately-sized city only to discover that—surprise!—there’s an extraterrestrial supervillain in residence and, oh, by the way, if you live downtown homeowners’ insurance is ridiculous!)

The second inter-film connection is less clear, but has spawned some interesting fan theories as well.  The idea is that, like Rise of the Guardians, Monsters VS. Aliens also takes place in the same reality as Megamind.  It’s not too far fetched—after all, both films involve extraterrestrials and amazing inventions—but there is one specific theory that really ties the two together.  Consider this for a moment: Megamind is a blue alien with incredible intelligence who hails from a destroyed planet.  Does that sound like any other DreamWorks character you know?  If you’ve seen Monster VS. Aliens, the antagonist, Gallaxhar, probably springs to mind.

According to Fandom.com, Gallaxhar’s official backstory is that he “destroyed his home planet” for the implied reason that “he experienced bad childhood and unhappy marriage.”  The fan theory is that that Gallaxhar’s planet was, in fact, Megamind’s home world, and that the former created or harnessed the black hole which destroyed it.  This would explain why Megamind’s people—as well as Metro Man’s—didn’t have time to escape despite being space-faring.  You see, black holes take millions of years to develop, and even a rogue black hole would take about a million to shift and swallow an entire solar system, so if the event had occurred naturally, there should have been plenty of time to build an entire fleet of spacecraft and leave for Earth or another safe planet.  (The fact that Megamind’s parents set his escape pod’s navigation system for Earth indicates that they knew of its existence.)

Of course, despite their large heads and blue skin tones, there are quite a few physical differences between Megamind and Gallaxhar.  The first is humanoid while the second has four eyes and tentacles instead of legs.  Fan theories have explanations for that, too, however.  

There appear to be two schools of thought on the subject.  The first is that Gallaxhar was another breed of alien living on the planet, possibly a servile race different from Minions, and the second is that part of Gallaxhar’s “bad childhood” involved being experimented upon, thus giving him his bizarre appearance and his seeming obsession with experimenting on others.  (There is some disagreement in the Megamind fandom about exactly why Gallaxhar was subjected to such treatment, ranging from falling into the hands of an unscrupulous scientist to being part of an experimental medical program.  The latter fan theory suggests that Gallaxhar was both blind and paraplegic, and that his additional eyes and tentacle “legs” were meant to rectify that, but that those physical differences made him an outsider, thus leading to his unhappy life and ultimate hatred for his own planet.)

If that were true, many may wonder what, exactly, Megamind might do if he ever found out about Gallaxhar.  Well, good news!  Just like there’s an app for everything, there’s a fan theory for that, too!  I will warn you, however, that this one is, frankly, build upon pretty thin evidence.  However, it’s interesting enough to be worth relating.

There is a character in Monsters VS. Aliens named General Warren R. Monger who, on the surface, is exactly what he appears to be: a high-ranking military man.  However, there are a few things that fans point to as possible evidence that Monger isn’t what he seems.  

The first is so simple that, alone, it would be inconsequential.  Monger rose through the ranks uncommonly fast, so much so that it caused some comment among others.  The second is significantly odder; Monger claims to be ninety years old despite looking like he is in his late forties.  Now, of course, this may have simply been the character exaggerating or messing with the “monsters” under his care, but some fans say it’s more than that, and claim that Monger chose that age because he was unfamiliar with human lifespans.  Next there is the fact that Monger is so intelligent that, despite one of the beings in his containment facility. Doctor Cockroach, being a super-genius, Monger outwits every escape attempt the monsters can make.  Then, of course, there is the fact that, despite his brusque manner, Monger seems to actually sympathize with the inhuman people he is charged with containing, and even pushes for them to be given a chance to prove themselves.  There is the oddity that, although he is assigned to the secret military base at “Area Fifty-Something,” Monger seems to disappear a lot, often for days at a time.  Finally, there are a few key physical and technological attributes: Monger has some odd and incredibly energetic facial expression—including a nearly maniacal smile and a dark scowl—as well as a jet pack that he appears to have constructed himself and green eyes.

I’m still not certain I see the resemblance, but maybe there are some similarities?  What do you think?

If you’re familiar with Metro City’s resident blue alien, you can probably see where this is going.  Although it’s not a popular theory, I’ve heard it suggested in the Megamind fandom that Monger is, in fact, Megamind disguised using his holowatch.  (This is why the green eyes are significant; Megamind’s eye color is the only aspect of his appearance that the holowatch doesn’t change.  However, I feel compelled to note that the shade of green appears to be different.) Fans insist that it would have been easy for someone as incredibly brilliant as Megamind to hack government systems and forge documents such as birth certificates thoroughly enough to dupe even U.S. Military Intelligence. The two jet packs, some have contested, look different either because of the disguise or because the one featured in Monster VS. Aliens is an older model. I’ve even seen the fact that both Megamind and Monger begin with M being pointed to as possible evidence that the latter is no more than an invention of the former.

The argument is as follows: as Monsters VS. Aliens takes place in 2009, one year before events in Megamind, it’s possible that Megamind, still being a villain, created an alter-ego which he could use to help him search for and deal with other alien life.  (He is shown to be painfully lonely, and the Megamind comics reveal his desperate desire to find other survivors from his home planet.)  Upon figuring out who Gallaxhar was, and more importantly what he had done, Megamind wanted to be part of taking him down.  But he couldn’t be too open about it; he was, after all, still a “Bad Guy.”  This theory explains Monger’s frequent long absences—during those time Megamind was back in Metro City taking care of his regular business— as well as why Monger had a secret soft spot for the “monsters.”  Megamind, having always been treated like a monster himself, would naturally want to give them a chance, but wouldn’t dare behave in too overtly friendly a manner as it would have aroused suspicion.

As I said, support for that particular theory is, perhaps, a little thin, especially given the fact the Monsters VS. Aliens preceded Megamind, so character designs from the former are unlikely to have been influenced by the latter.  Nonetheless, I admit to appreciating the complexity and creativity of it.  It’s an undeniably fun theory. If they haven’t already, maybe someone will write a fan fiction about it one day.

Those are only a few of the theories out there connecting Megamind with other fandoms.  One could go on and on about the subject, but I won’t torture readers by doing that.  Nonetheless, it illustrates once again the immense love and original thought that Megamind fans put into developing their theories!  I dare say that few other animated movies have earned a following so dedicated and inventive…  But, then, any of us who love the film Megamind will tell you that it has more than earned the consideration!

[yashashveeroy]

Heyyy, im a libra sun, cap moon and scorpio rising, what does that mean?

Thank you :)

Hello!! @kiwi-iam Here’s my interpretation of your placements!🥰💜

Please read the newly added Rules regarding “Asks” here before reading this interpretation.

Libra Sun:

Sandro Botticelli is what came to my mind first when I looked at your placements. Specifically his painting “The Birth of Venus”. I’m in fact doing an assignment about his work ! Such perfect timing haha🥰 We all know Venus rules Libra, it’s romantic, playful, charming and full of life at it’s best. At it’s worst it’s self-indulgent, materialistic and flaky. Oh, I myself had fallen in love with one back in the day, he was amazing and god!!! THOSE SHOULDERS🥵🤤!! Lmao enough about me haha! To me Libras have always been very appealing when it comes to certain talents that they have. For example: Any musical talents, Fine arts, dancing, theatrical arts or anything to do with emotional expression. Photography being one of the main according to me. This placement often has this thing about following an aesthetic. These aesthetics could range from renaissance to anime or even gothic themed. There just has to be one. Colours for this placement could range from antique gold, true gold, flesh tones, grays, taupes, mauves or browns. Libra suns have this ability to attract an audience in whatever they do. Be it on social media or in reality. Everyone will always have something to say about a libra sun. It’s a guarantee. Fame and Fortune is a special advantage because of Venus here. Aesthetics, sex, charms and luxury (Venus) meets Grandeur (Sun) is what having a Libra sun is to me. Everything is grand and glamorous. You are unstoppable in the dating field. Many want you but cannot have you. You come with your own set of standards that you seek in a partnership. Sometimes looks don’t matter as long as you catch hold of the right personality. You can be highly rebellious and reckless when you don’t have your way. This needs to be worked on. You can play with hearts when you’re heartbroken, bored or just for the fun of it, which is why, one may call you a “player”. You have to come to terms with your inner child’s wounds.

Capricorn Moon:

Showing Physical touch and acts of service your way of showing love to your close ones. When a libra sun is paired with a Capricorn moon, it’s very nurturing, parental, grounded and loving. Heavenly sex and passionate kissing is what comes with this combination🥵. It’s currently 4:44 am while I’m writing this, this angel number brings stable and well grounded relationships when associated with romance! How cute to be getting a confirmation from the universe while I’m writing this 💖 It’s ‘secrecy and patience (Saturn) meets pleasure (Venus)’ with the libra and Capricorn combination. So while Venus may want to roam in her world of fantasies, Saturn will bring her reality and discipline. Natives with this placement will be very much in tune with their home environment. This could also make someone wifey or hubby material ahaha! A Homebody, I swear. Very much into DIYs or traditional things. Cottage vibes. The biggest problem with a Capricorn moon is that it won’t always show emotions, especially if underdeveloped. You might bury yourself in something so that you don’t have the time to come face to face with your emotions. Please don’t do that🥺. Excellent management and executive skills when paired with libra sun. People will actually listen to you properly and you will automatically have an upper hand on them. But don’t take advantage of it! Use it wisely and get work done.

Scorpio Rising:

Ahhhh this is one of the main reasons why I got excited to do your interpretation!! Greetings, fellow Scorpio rising!!💜🥰

Now forget Venus for a moment and think of Persephone. Think of Persephone as the ruler of your libra sun for a moment. Hades is the ruler of Pluto as it is which is represented by your Scorpio rising. Think of their romance. Hades= Ruler of death and underworld. Persephone= Ruler of spring and nature. Hades loved Persephone so much from the moment he saw her. The moment she was abducted by him, her role changed from being the Goddess of spring and vegetation to becoming the Goddess/Queen of Rebirth. She spent her adult and married life with Hades doing exactly that with the earth’s seasons. It’s the reason why we have the four seasons. Similarly, here it’s the same with your Libra sun and Scorpio rising combination. The themes of love, sex, death and rebirth are heavily romanticised and harmonised together. Your libra sun will always see something beautiful in the dark and mysterious ways of your Scorpio rising. Behind the mask of suspicion and inflexibility lies a nature full of charm, love and passion. This is what Hades’ and Persephone’s relationship became over time. They were intimidating to the world together but loving to each other when in private. Nothing dark will ever scare you. In fact, you will fall in love with it and will want to dive deeper into it. A lot of people will be fascinated with your innocent yet mature, childish yet sexual aura. Jealousy will be a trait that you will have to learn to tame. Blessed with the ability to love and destroy, you will feel like god. You can be a mediator in misunderstandings. No bullshit tolerated when you’re around. Tough love. You could have perfect manners and behaviour according to the settings of your environment. With your charm and seduction, you can be highly persuasive😏. Blessed will be the person who will have Sex with you. Amen.🥵

I really hope this interpretation resonated with you! Don’t forget to leave your feedback in the comments of this post!!🥰💜

Love, Roy.

[writingwithcolor]

First of all, thank you for this blog, it has been really helpful for me - also thank you for the efficient navigation. Now to my question: I'm toying with the idea of a white OC who has (or earns) the power to basically alter the structure of things and wants to use that to help with world hunger. They gotta see what they change, so they have to visit the places. They don't want to be hailed a white savior, and change their look - should I use obvious fantasy colors like grey or purple?

Solving World Hunger: Changing Skin to Fantasy Color to Avoid the White Savior

My take: this is absolutely positively going to disrespect Indigenous populations, so long as you have an outsider come in and do the thing. This reads as extremely Western-centric and reminds me of misguided “international development” students who think that just because they have a degree in solving global scale problems, it means they can be experts.

See, the thing about sustainable food practices is, the Indigenous populations of the area have already come up with pretty good solutions. They’ve lived in the landscape for thousands of years, after all, and were pretty scientific and focused on long-term gains instead of short-term profit. It’s about as close to perfect as multiple millennia of improving and testing can do.

It’s colonialist to erase culture in the name of “betterment”

Hunter/gatherers don’t always capitalistically “maximize” their food sources in ways Westerners recognize, but it’s sustainable has been part of their culture for thousands of years. Are you going to allow them to continue their practices, or are you going to say that their culture is wrong and they must be assimilated into agriculture (that might actually be completely unsustainable even if done by magic but you won’t see the effects for 50+ years)?

Anthropologists main role over the past few years have been to elevate the voices of Indigenous people who know what works best for the area they’ve been living in for generations. Outsiders, even the most well-educated outsiders, are going to get it wrong.

You can’t make them Indigenous to get around this, because Indigenous people are not a monolith. 

Polynesian practices won’t work in sub-sahara Africa, Iroquois practices won’t work in the Amazon, etc. If you think that one ethnicity can solve the globe’s problems, you need to revisit the concept of expertise.

Eco-fascism is also a thing that happens in environmentalism very quickly, in the form of only certain types of food production/crops are “allowed” to thrive, and capitalism does not like sustainability because sustainability doesn’t exactly turn a profit. The best way to use land is often “inefficient” in the short term, but in the long term will provide a sustained food source even if that system looks much different from what we know.

The Indigenous populations around the globe have already had to deal with people who say their way of life is wrong, which your character is going to end up doing if they are the ones who decide what “the best” is. The Inuit are a fairly high-profile example, with how their seal and whale hunt is targeted; the North is such a place that seal and whale hunting is necessary, agriculture is impossible in the way we know it, and what the North needs is global warming to drastically reverse+ colonizers to stop messing with their ability to eat and for-fun hunters never setting foot in the Arctic again.

The problem isn’t the character’s skin tone. The problem is the fact they believe they can be an authority, when they cannot be at such a scale.

Decolonizing > “Fixing”

I would suggest having your character do decolonization work instead of “fixing” work. Decolonization means dismantling capitalism, restructuring agriculture/horticulture to focus on local species designed to live in the region, allowing populations to return to hunter/gatherer ways, removing invasive species (like the wrong species of earthworms in North America, which actually would need magic to fix), and restoring sovereignty of Indigenous peoples. It also means allowing greenhouses and a degree of sustainable supply chain for those with allergies who can’t eat local.

Indigenous peoples need to be centred in sustainable farming and animal husbandry practices. Their voices and their practices are what need to be elevated, instead of an outsider trying to guess what’s best in such a short period of time.

This means white people will be uncomfortable. 

Because white people do not like to give up leadership positions. They don’t like being told they need to let go of power and remove themselves from authority. But they are not the authority on how best to work lands that they have only seen as capitalistic gains. Indigenous people are.

If you want to see the potential journeys this character can undergo, read Colette’s post below.

~ Mod Lesya

Readers will view your character as white

Even as a fantasy color, your “raceless” MC will be assigned white by the majority of your readers unless you put in work to indicate otherwise. 

To the story’s world they might be an alien of sorts. To us, they are another white person who is saving the world. 

White is seen as the default when you leave it to fill-in-the-blank. Race coding (adding details that would imply they’re from a specific race, ethnic background or culture) is how one avoids this.

Directions you could take 

There’s a few ways you could go about this.

A. Make them an actual alien.

You could make them an alien, and actually develop an alien culture that does not parallel or borrow enough from specific cultures to imply they’re a human race equivalent. You would have to work pretty hard at this, as the elements you choose might come from existing regions and cultures. For example, a lot of “neutral” fantasy places are clearly coded with a European flair and no indication that they’re a Person of Color, thus implying white European descent. Then you’re back to square one with white-coded Alien solving the world’s problems. 

B. Keep them white.

You could keep them white, but face the implications within the story’s world narrative and the perspective of readers. 

Its a heavily discussed topic here, so you’ll find many resources.

White Savior WWC Posts:

How to Avoid Glorifying White Characters

The Mighty Whitey: How to not have a Colonialist Character

Writing With Color - White Savior Tag

The Khalessi Problem (Game of Thrones)

Image: Game of Thrones, the TV series. White woman being lifted up and surrounded by tan and brown-skinned people. Minor spoilers will be discussed below. 

Now, I know you don’t want a scene like the one pictured above. That’s why you’re considering they disguise themselves as a fantasy race. But there are some implications that come with a white person who snaps their fingers and solves a community’s problems like it was nothing. 

“What, like it’s hard to solve world hunger?”

On the show, she is pretty much worshiped here, but does disrespect their people enough to lose the majority of their respect and be seen as the outsider coming into their lives as she is. 

Something similar could happen where she is confronted with unintentional consequences of getting involved. There may be some backlash, mixed feelings, making it so your MC is not completely worshiped for their actions. 

What about all of the efforts that people in the community made before your character came along? Might they confront your character, and how would they feel about them? 

What if solving world hunger came with a price, and there were other issues that cropped up as a result?

What if the job is not done? As if they helped get it started, but maintaining keeping the world feed isn’t as “snap and done” as it seemed and opened up a new layer of problems that people have to deal with?

Think of how in some tales, when you get your wish from the genie, it may be answered almost too literally and the effects can be disastrous.

C. Make them a Person of Color. 

This could still lead to issues too, similar to ones you’d find with the white savior. Just because someone is a POC doesn’t mean they’re immune to disrespecting other cultures and lifestyles, or of patronizing people. 

More reading:

Is there such thing as the White Savior syndrome with a Black main character?

~Mod Colette

[astrovian]

the official ranking of Claude Becker outfits

the official ranking of Daniel Miller outfits here

the official ranking of Adam Price outfits here

all Claude Becker outfits & rankings under the cut

we all know RA looks good in a suit, blah, blah, blah

after two of these rankings, this outfit is the physical embodiment of a yawn

I do appreciate the patterned tie to change things up a tad even if I’m not into the pattern itself. the intent is there, just not the execution

I will give props to the team for giving Claude a patterned dress shirt here (you have to squint a bit on the second image - more on patterned dress shirts later), but they really should have upped the game a little - change the tie & be less subtle with the shirt pattern

and I ask you, does Claude Becker not strike you as a man who would insist on at least a pocket square with his suits?? dream bigger stylists

3/10

@whoever stores old movie props if these weren’t disposed of immediately after filming i will pay you for a copy of one of these

putting aside the hilarious social commentary and fucking literal writing on this magazine cover done by some poor prop designer at 2am (”How to starve artists and other capitalist things”, as well as ”Claude Becker rolls up his shirtsleeves and unties his tie and puts on a vest and casually hangs his hands from his pockets” etc.), this is a nice change-up that made me question why we don’t have RA in just a waistcoat and dress shirt more often

also that tie pattern? fab. I love it. that is how to do a patterned tie. I hope we all know RA looks good in a suit, blah, blah, blah is paying attention

that being said, minimal points because we don’t actually see Claude wearing it in real life

4/10

where, oh where is my polo shirt? oh look, it’s right there

is there any RA character who is not afflicted with a polo shirt? not recently, apparently

I genuinely thought that it was a dress shirt for a moment which had me disappointed at the banality but then that turned into utter devastation as I realised we actually are looking at a long sleeve zip up polo shirt

the draping of the coat? phenomenal and what really brings this entire thing together

the long/three-quarter sleeves? the zip-up rather than buttons? better than one can normally expect from a polo shirt... and then they went and added stripes to the collar and sleeves?? regret

could be a lot worse but could ultimately also not be a polo shirt as well 4.5/10

could have tried harder during lessons but was a pleasure to have in class

I’m sure you all know my long-sleeve shirt obsession with RA but I made a promise to be honest with myself on these lists. the only feeling this outfit evokes is a ‘eh’

the equivalent of a middle slider 5/10

the Claude you’d actually have a fun day with

there’s something about RA in a hoody that just bangs. good lord I also have a weakness for those forearms

I also thought for a good moment these were dark jeans, but they disappointingly turn out to be sweatpants? however, it has made me think that we need to see RA in some darker denim shades more often 

this Claude is could have tried harder during lessons but was a pleasure to have in class but with just a little more fun and class to boost it *just* outside of the ‘eh’ zone

5.2/10

now this is how we do a long-sleeved shirt

I think it’s been fairly well-established by now that loose, long-sleeved RA is my ultimate weakness, so it’s nice to see that Ocean’s 8 is also making a concerted effort to murder me

also Claude’s obsession with sweatpants is giving me life

this is the Claude you make pasta with. and that pasta would be damn tasty, too

5.9/10

come hither

just-woken-up Claude is made 100x better by the bed head hair and the sleepy gaze

this man needs to get back into bed for a snuggle (preferably with me)

I can’t decide if I’m into the loose boxers or missing the tighter Adam Price undies. either way, it’s definitely not a bad aesthetic. and it reminds me, like dad chic Adam Price, that we don’t get enough of RA in shorts

I feel bad assigning numbers to a a shirtless one BUT Claude does transform into being fully-clothed in this scene so I’m going with it 6.4/10

you can kiss my hand anytime

the blessing of this film is not only the visual assault of attractive actors from all sides and genders, but it also instigates in me the thought that RA is wearing printed dress shirts and I can’t remember the last time I saw this?? I never even realised how much I need to see a lot more of this kind of look on RA until we were blessed with this vision

look at those lil’ elephants!! adorable. I hope Claude has a closet full of these with different animals on them

this outfit was so good, RA even wore it in his behind-the-scenes interview

7/10 for a printed, suited dream

the Claude you take home to mom & dad

god, it’s even better without the suit jacket

this is my honest appeal to the powers that may or may not be to put RA in more printed dress shirts

7.6/10

sometimes I think I should be more ashamed of myself

I feel like I need to preface this one thusly: okay, but like hear me out for real this time

I know this is ultimate hipster white-dude look and RA plays into that character so fantastically with Claude here. I mean just look at his expression. something about this whole look makes me want to simultaneously punch this man in the face and also take him home with me

this is a man who you know is a mistake before you make it, but choose to follow through anyway. he’s that last shot of tequila or the 5th glass of wine. you know you would go for him too. don’t even try to deny it

is the high ranking because of the novelty factor? is it because I’ve never seen RA wear a beanie like that and honestly the infamous running Daniel Miller could take notes? is it because I can’t take anyone who wears a beanie like that seriously?

all we do know is that I also can’t believe this is so high on the list

7.8/10

the moment we all learned Claude is 100% a bottom

one of the most iconic Claude moments in the film. RA plays the ‘dumb horny idiot’ character so well in this scene

not so into the pinstriped suit jacket but the hoodie peeking out from underneath combined with the thin scarf makes it for me

8/10

question: how may teeny-weeny scarves does Claude own, exactly?

who could forget the iconic moment when Sandra Bullock nearly shivs RA?

we have another printed dress shirt and I am HERE for it. it even has birds this time!! nice to see that Claude is not just a land mammal sort of man

I will concede that this is the sort of pattern that few men can pull off but RA is making it work and I am living

8.7/10

I’m not sure I can make a comment on this one that is even remotely appropriate except for “I told you Claude is a bottom”

safety first, buy some proper restraints for the bedroom please Claude/10

 modern royalty au Thorin

this is the moment that every single Hobbit fan went “hell yeah, now I have the perfect new aesthetic for my modern royalty Hobbit AU” (as an avid lotr/hobbit fan, I am not joking here)

RA looks like royalty here because he should be. please sign my petition to have RA usurp the British Queen

for real though, that baby blue sash is the 1000% perfect added touch to this suit and we love RA in a baby blue. a decent (and clearly successful) effort to match the faux Met Gala theme: European royalty. however, it is also pretty accurate re: the imaginative effort that most men have with altering their Met Gala outfits to fit that year’s theme

we need more RA in ‘modern royal’ roles for the #aesthetic and also so that he can dress like this more often

9.3/10 for a princely (or dare I say kingly?) figure

James Corden looks so gleeful running after Claude that it makes me happy. I get it, James. I get it

there’s really nothing spectacular about the general outfit here - except for the swagger RA is giving this

pants? shirt? boring, meh

check scarf? a brilliant switch up from Claude’s normal thin scarves. 

the popped coat? now we’re cooking

the sunglasses and wind-ruffled hair that screams “I’m hungover but I still look effortlessly handsome”? delectable

the dogs?? the best set dressing one could ask for

the attitude and ‘I’m too cool for you’ swagger? priceless and what makes this the second-best outfit of the whole film

9.6/10 this man could punch me and I would be grateful

hot diggity dog, someone get me Claude’s handcuffs

from the front view, it could be argued that this outfit (well, technically it may not really be a separate outfit as it’s the undone version of modern royalty au Thorin), while fairly exceptional, does not first place make

however, someone had the idea to shoot RA from a side angle in this and for that I am eternally in their debt

it’s all about the tease with this one. the glimpse of the suspenders (and holy shit, RA in suspenders was not a look I had thought about before). the way the waist coat hangs off Claude’s chest like that, just enough to make its presence obvious. the cufflinks. the delicate pocket watch chain.

if previous outfits on this list have been all sex and swagger, this is the foreplay. the subtle strip tease.

10/10 

[beebubb]

I read your LJ and will headcanons and i really love them! Can you perhaps make some headcanons of when LJ had to take care of baby william? Like how would he treat him when he hated him and then when he actually grew to like him?

Ahhhhhh!!! Yessss!!! I'm gonna make this a post of LJ taking care or will from newborn to now

LJ taking care of william grossman headcanons (childhood all the way to now) + a bit of will's back story

Will as a baby

Will was assigned to LJ before will was even born

So while everyone was celebrating the pregnancy, LJ was just pissed

"GODDAMNIT THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU DON'T USE PROTECTION!!"

no one could hear or see him obviously, so he could say what ever he wanted

He just look at the dad be like "i bet that brat isn't even yours!"

He would just DREAD the day will was finally born

When will was born, and his mom finally came back home with will in her arms, was when he finally met him

".....he looks exactly like fucking isaac goddamnit!!!!"

He wouldn't take care of will and could care less about him

He would appear to will whenever he was alone in the nursery room and just say the meanest things to him or just hate anything will did

".....you're the cum shot your mom should have swallowed...."

"can you shut the fuck up?!?"

*carrying him* "go to hell you annoying waste of space"

"i wish I could take your eye out like I did to your fucking grandpa....."

"you know I can gut you whenever I feel like it"

Or just make dark jokes

"i can knock all your teeth over just like isaac! Wait, you don't have any! Hahaha!!"

LJ doesn't admit but, when he was watching over will, he just started crying, he was just so overwhelmed by everything, especially knowing he was stuck with his enemy's grandkid "i hate that i'm stuck with you!!! Why the fuck would you even want me?!? You're just going to abandon me just like your damn grandfather!!!"

With time though, he started growing fond of him

Will was really close to LJ. He would just smile to him, laugh, grab his pointy nose, and even if jack rarely carried him, you know those feathers jack has on his shoulders? Will would immediatly fall asleep with those

Once LJ was a bit more ready to care for him, was when he actually started trying

"Alright, i'm your guardian! I hate it! But if i'm stuck with you, i'm going to raise you MY way!"

"I'm the one protecting you so you BETTER say my name as your first word, got it?"

It took him a bit to warm up to him but it eventually came along

Will was a cuddly baby, so he loved to sleep on LJ's shoulder and grab his nose

"let go of my nose before I kill you"

When he was finally attached to will, he was acting more of a parent than anyone.

He would hate it if someone didn't take proper care of him

"you're holding him wrong!"

"he doesn't like to be held like that!"

"you're supposed to put 2 scoops of formula! Not 1!!"

"goddamnit I'm doing most of the work here!!!"

"if yall wanted a kid you should atleast know to care for it!"

Will's first word was JJ.

It was his attempt at saying LJ

"holy shit!!! That's not my name but it's close!! I knew it!!"

His mom and dad saw it as insignificant and thought it was just those weird baby noises that babies make

But LJ knew what he meant and was more happy than ever

"he likes me more!! In your face assholes!!"

Will as a toddler

LJ was there for his first words, so he was also there for will's first steps

Will was also a very energetic kid, and once he started crawling and walking, it was more chaos for his parents

They had to baby proof a lot of things

But LJ could keep up with his energy, and sometimes even tire him

Though there was this one time when will called him "daddy" and his dad thought he was calling him but actually, he was talking to LJ

Many think that LJ might hate to be called that sense well, you know, he hates children, but he honestly didn't know how to feel. He was a bit surprised, a bit happy, and confused

He didn't deny it, it was just like

Toddler will: daddy! Daddy!

LJ: um....uh... Lets keep playing ok?

LJ loved will and was happy to care for him and pretty much the hate he had towards him was pretty much gone but, he didn't really know how to feel

He let it slide but will called him that a lot

LJ would get a bit emotional sometimes but he would just try to ignore it and keep playing with will

Or he would just slightly smile

Will as a kid (4-11)

Will was now more aware and way more energetic

Which was more fun for LJ

Will didn't have many friends, except for LJ

Even if he was happy and energetic, will was a shy child at school.

Also he didn't play with anyone except jack

The teachers thought that will was weird and called his parents a lot

The teachers would always say stuff like "he doesn't play with any of the other children, and talks alone like if he were talking with someone else especially someone he says is called" jack", is everything OK at home? Have you seen a family psychologist?"

Will was actually taken to a few therapy sessions but he wasn't diagnosed with any mental illnesses. So people just assumed that will just had a really active imagination and that jack was just an imaginary friend

Though will being "weird" just meant he was gonna be an easy target to get bullied

But jack wouldn't let that happen. He wouldn't let some asshole kids ruin will's childhood

Sometimes when the kids would go to the bathroom or just go to the hallway to the drinking fountain, he would scare them by turning the lights on and off

Or he would even follow them home and would make his claw like hands appear from inside their closets or under their beds.

Sometimes he would even grab their legs which would terrify the kids

They soon stopped bothering will because "jack will come and get you!"

So will had a pretty good childhood thanks to Jack sense he would protect him of pretty much everything

When will was in kindergarden they had arts and crafts, he would sometimes draw his mom and his dad together but mostly his drawings were of jack

The teachers thought the parents were irresponsible because lets say that sometimes will's drawing were a bit graphic or creepy and they thought that it was because will watched too much horror movies

Teacher: what are you drawing, William?

Will: it's Jack and I!

Teacher: oh that's nice! But.. What.. What are you doing with Jack?

Will: We're using the stuff inside the guy's belly to make balloon animals! *keeps drawing* jack said that I'll be a killer when I grow up!

Jack was just a proud clown guardian

Jack's prized possession was a drawing that will made of the two of them. It just made him feel really appreciated. Also he encouraged will to play with the kids but will just preferred LJ

LJ: you know that you can play with the other kids right?

Will: i don't want to! I don't like the other kids! I want to be with you, you're my best friend!

It was just fun with will that someday jack would spend days laughing and laughing that sometimes it felt like he would get his colors back

Also will learned to cuss at a young age. And everyone can already guess where he got that from

He was a horror movie fan

Which is why he always said "i want to be like Jason when I grow up!"

"i want to do what leatherface does!"

"I'm going to be just like ghostface!"

But when LJ told him about the pastas, is when he started admiring them

"when I grow up, I'm going to work for slenderman!!"

Also you know in that one comic page where will was at the institution and said "i am the one and only grossman! And I will become the greatest killer the world and the underworld has ever seen!"

Well he had been saying that ever sense he was a kid

Will's mom was a really caring and nice mother but she would soon start getting angry every time will said he wanted to be a killer

Everytime the family got together or the neighbors would ask will what he wanted to be when he grew up, will's mom would always get embarrassed and try to change the answer

Neighbor: what do you want to be when you grow up?

Will: i want to be a killer!

Mom: AN ACTOR!! he wants to be an actor!! He just.. Um... Has seen so many horror movies and well he likes the actors! So he wants to be one!

Will would always get scolded by his mom or get grounded

"William, i told you a million times!!! Stop saying you want to be a killer!!! That doesn't exists! Just choose something normal!!"

William would sometimes just stand or sit in the corner and cry

LJ was always there to comfort him

"Don't cry buddy! Don't listen to that bitch! You will be a killer!"

His mom would get annoyed a lot of will talking about LJ

"You're six!!! You're old enough to know that jack is just an imaginary friend!"

"He's not imaginary!!!!"

And ever sense will knew about the underworld, that's the only place he would talk about.

Will: LJ please take me with you!! I want to go to the under realm! I want to meet jeff the killer! And ben! And masky! And slenderman!

LJ: i can't take you now but i promise i will when you're older!

Will loved his parents but he slowly started disliking them.

His mom always seemed embarrassed of him and his dad was becoming distant

The day that his parents got divorced, he did cry a few days.

He would always ask LJ "did dad leave because of me?"

But jack was there to reassure him it wasn't his fault.

"He's just a deadbeat bitch dad! But i'll be here for you! You don't need him!"

LJ pretty much took a fatherly role to will but never realised it

In will's school he had this "bring your parent to school day" thing and he didn't tell his mom, he wanted LJ to come

LJ didn't have a human disguise like the other pastas sense he was technically an imaginary friend. So he had to consult the rulers of hell to give him a temporary one or grant him that ability

LJ: Come on please! He really wants me to attend! Lend me a fucking hand here!

Paimon: i don't know, your job is just to protect him, you don't NEED to attend something as simple as a school event, he has his mother

LJ: i know but my boy wants ME to come! He doesn't want his damn mother to go!

Yeah, LJ called him "his boy"

He was more of a father than ever even if he didn't admit it

Bael: *sighs* fine, we'll give you a disguise just for today

LJ: yes! Thank you!

And LJ was able to go to will's school, he just presented himself as will's uncle

Will was happier than ever

Jack tried to act normal so he made up lies of his career

"Oh um i'm a....surgeon!"

Being a surgeon was the closest thing to his actual job. I mean, they both take out people's guts right?

Will as a teen (13-17) (basically now)

Will had a bit of an emo phase but not completely. It only appeared whenever he was with his mom

Only when he was with his mom he was distant and always seemed annoyed

He became the typical angsty teen. Started drinking, getting piercings, dying his hair, wear black, eyeliner, etc

Mom: another piercing?!

Will: yeah! Why do you care!?! I'm already an embarrassment to you aren't i?!

They would get into arguments a lot

Especially because of his sexuality

His mom didn't respect will's privacy so he would always check his texts, pictures, etc

"You're talking with girls AND boys?!?!"

Will was bisexual but only LJ knew obviously.

"If my boy likes guys then fucking let him!!! Stupid bitch!!!"

Though no matter who won the argument, it always ended with will crying or just laying on his bed listening to music

William would run away a LOT

Him and LJ had found an abandoned hospital where they would always hang out.

Will could be himself with LJ

His mood and attitude completely changed there.

They would drink beer together, tell jokes, prank random people in the streets, or just do random things

"Look at this street sign i stole!!"

But how did will finally go to the underworld? A family argument in will's 16th birthday

His mom invited everyone to the house.

But will was uninterested

And his mom like always, didn't want to "be embarrassed" by will, so he forced him to wear something else besides black, to take all of his piercings off, and didn't let him dye his hair

Everyone was there eating together

But will, like always, was distant

Uncle: so how are things in school?

Will: everything's fine

Cousin: what college are you going to?

Will: *shrugs*

Will hated his party.

LJ: enjoying your sweet 16? Haha!

Will: i hate it....

LJ frowned seeing him upset in his own birthday, but he gave him something

LJ: hey, i got you a little something! I know you want to be a killer so here!

He gave will the bird mask

Will: ! My...my first killer mask?!

LJ: yep!

Will: holy shit!!! Thank you! *puts it on* i love it!! I look like an actual serial killer!

LJ: i knew you would like it!

Will was super happy with his mask but he was called outside to cut the cake

"Cut your cake bud! Once this party is over, how about we go get some drinks?"

Will smiled "alright!"

He went out to cut his cake.

A few hours later though, everything was ruined

Will had another argument with his mom.

Will: I'M your son!!! Not them!!! Why do you like them more?!

Mom: i do like you will! I just...i just want you to be normal like them! I want you to want a normal career! To do better in school! To dress differently, and like girls!

Will: i DO like girls!!!

Mom: then why were you talking to boys?!?

Everyone just looked at will in shock

Will: b-because.....because i'm fucking bisexual!!! I like boys AND girls!! I'm not gay!!! There's a difference!!!

Mom: but you like boys!! That's not normal!! Nothing of you is normal!! Liking boys isn't normal! And being a killer isn't normal either!!

Will: oh so you hate me for being me?!?! I fucking hate you!!! You make my life a living hell!!!

Will stormed off to his room and locked himself and started sobbing.

Jack saw everything. He would have killed will's mom but everyone was there, plus he wasn't allowed to (a disadvantage of having a deal with the rulers of hell)

Will felt humiliated infront of the whole family

Jack saw how upset he was, so that's when he finally made up his mind

LJ: hey, remember when i told you i was bringing you to the underworld one day?

Will: *wiping away his tears* y-yeah?

LJ: well, that's today!

Will: wait, really?!?

Will immediately sat up his a smile on his face

LJ: yep! How about we leave this place? Let's go to to the underworld! You won't have to worry about your mom anymore! Or that shitty family of yours!

Will: yes!!!!! Yes I'd love that!!!

LJ: then pack your things and lets go!

Will got up from his bed and started packing. And once he was done, he just stood up smiling with his bags in hand

Will: let's go!!

LJ covered will's eyes with his hands.

And before Will knew it, he was in the underworld.

And that's when will finally started a new life.

LJ didn't have a luxurious life to give will but will loved it. Even if they lived in a shitty apartment, will was more happy than ever.

Will was still underage so LJ took care of getting him registered as an official underworld citizen and getting all the paper work done to have full custody of will as his guardian

So he basically adopted will

Will: i can actually be a killer here right?

LJ: yep! There's actually an institution for killers! So I'll start working on enrolling you in!

Will: yes!!!

And that's basically how their lives started

[ursus-mari]

Lol I would definitely love to see a good “kiss to hide their faces from pursuers”

Hi! Person!! Hello!!! Thank you, this was a lot of fun! I don’t know where it came from and it wasn’t meant to be this long but eh. For context, Merlin’s role here is basically an amalgam of every magical girl anime I ever watched plus like. kaito kid. No idea how we got there but here we are. I imagine the transformation thing doesn’t involve any actual physical change except the eyes, but it blocks people’s ability to perceive and recognize features and all that. Sorry, I ramble sometimes. Anyway, thank you again, and I hope you enjoy this?

...

Arthur Pendragon was a normal sort. Well, a bit better than normal, if he was being honest. He got good grades, he was captain of the football team, and his father was the well respected Chief of Police, Uther Pendragon. The point of all of this being that Arthur was certainly not the type to get caught up with the well-known sorcerer-thief Emrys.

So it was a mystery to Arthur how he’d ended up trailing after the aforementioned thief as they ran from one of his father’s officers specifically assigned to the Emrys case.

Arthur had been walking home, minding his own business, as he was wont to do, when Emrys had darted around a corner, crashing into Arthur and sending them both toppling to the ground. Arthur had not registered the thief’s identity as he’d been a bit preoccupied with having been knocked over and planning a very long and voracious complaint about it.

“Watch where you’re going, you idiot!”

Emrys had sent him a withering look, and that was right about when Arthur registered the glowing golden eyes and realized he was well and truly fucked. “I was going to apologize, but if you’re going to be rude about it, your royal highness, you can shove it straight up your arse.”

Arthur just stared, frozen. Emrys registered something Arthur couldn’t hear with a curse, pulled them both up off the ground, and started running, Arthur’s hand still clutched in his. That broke Arthur out of his freakout in light of entirely new information to freak out about. “Hey! Let go!”

Emrys shot Arthur a quick scowl over his shoulder. “Trust me, you don’t want to get caught in the vicinity of where Emrys disappeared. They’ll think you’re me, and you won’t like what they do to sorcerers.”

“I’ll be fine.” Emrys scoffed. “No, seriously, I’m--”

Emrys yanked them both down a dark alleyway before Arthur could inform Emrys as to who exactly his father was, as if this whole misadventure couldn’t get worse. Arthur was going to get stabbed, probably. By Emrys or another sorcerer or some creepy person who lurked in alleys for fun. He was going to die.

“What are you--”

“Shut up, shut up, shut up,” Emrys hissed, throwing a furtive glance over his shoulder. “You really, really don’t want them to find us, I promise you that.”

“Could you just--”

Emrys covered Arthur’s mouth with his palm and narrowed his eyes threateningly, jerking his head toward the corner they’d just rounded. Right, that did sound like his father’s men.

Emrys shoved Arthur up against the wall, a hot, tense line down his front. Arthur’s breathing grew faster and shallower despite his best efforts as he listened to the approaching footsteps. He was a good, normal citizen. He didn’t deserve to be caught up in this. Emrys, though he did a decent job of hiding it, was clearly panicking too, which meant whatever the consequences for being caught were, they were bad. He was pushy and rude and a criminal besides, but Arthur didn’t think he deserved that. Besides, Arthur really, really didn’t want to get caught.

And then suddenly, the solution was right there. Literally right in front of his face.

“Hey, they’re just looking for your eyes, right?”

“Yes, but be quiet!”

Right, so this would work then. Arthur grabbed Emrys’s neck and dragged him closer.

“What are you--”

“Just trust me.”

And then Arthur kissed him, muffling the surprised noise Emrys made with his mouth. It was a surprisingly nice kiss given the circumstances once Emrys started to respond. The physical contact meant Arthur felt it when Emrys’s powers ran out, a buzzing hum that seemed to resonate in him. Which kind of made it better? Which was obviously very wrong and magic was very evil and cute thieves were clearly not to be trusted, no matter how talented they were with their tongue. Arthur even almost managed to forget why he was kissing a cute boy in an alleyway.

“Oi! This is a restricted area!”

Or not.

But they didn’t stop, horribly aware of what showing their faces might mean. Eventually, they heard the man mutter, “Damn kids,” and stomp off, and the two of them let out a mutual breath of relief, resting their foreheads against each other for a moment as they waited a moment to be sure he and his partner were gone.

 Emrys pulled away fairly soon (too soon), eyes now a lovely grey-blue. Arthur stared for a moment, keenly aware that he might be the only one who knew what the elusive Emrys actually looked like.

“Er,” Emrys said, avoiding Arthur’s eyes and blushing faintly. He was really, really cute. Fuck. Arthur was not going to develop a crush on a dangerous sorcerer he’d likely never see again, he wasn’t-- “Thanks for the help, I suppose. And sorry for dragging you into…” Emrys gestured vaguely to the whole alleyway. “...all this.”

“Well,” Arthur said, trying not to be too disappointed by the fact that this felt like a goodbye despite himself. “Not every day you get to kiss Emrys, Camelot’s most wanted.”

“Merlin,” Emrys blurted, blushing again. Ah fuck, Arthur was screwed, wasn’t he? He was going to spend his days pining away for a blurry image on the news. This was his life now. “My name’s Merlin.”

“Arthur.” 

They stared at each other for a moment before Emrys-- Merlin cleared his throat and made to leave. “Right, I’ll just… thanks again.”

“Anytime,” Arthur said faintly, and realized with horror that he meant it.

…

The next day, a new student named Merlin Wyllt with blue-grey eyes stood in the front of the classroom to introduce himself, and Arthur knew the exact moment Merlin saw him because that was when he saw the horror he was feeling reflected in the other boy’s face.

Fuck.

[army-of-mai-lovers]

hello arthur!! tbh people are being terrible in your inbox and the last ask killed my brain cells so this is your free bingo card to talk about anything you like. also sometimes googling sharks with human teeth (exactly what it sounds like) helps!! much love <3

oh my gosh I’m OBSESSED with these photos they’re so cute!!!! and thank you for the bingo card Effie I appreciate it so much. I’m gonna rant about Deadly Class (a show I definitely don’t like and thus don’t run a fan blog for....smh) bc it’s on my mind and it looks like it’s just going to go quietly into that good night instead of being made fun of and dissected and I think that should change bc goodness gracious that show does not deserve a dignified death. also I’m gonna put this rant under a readmore bc this is gonna be long and it has nothing to do w atla. warnings for discussions of racism, callous mentions of murder and death, swearing, discussion of Nazis, discussion of gore, abuse ment

Okay so for those not in the know (which is probably everyone considering the show was on Syfy and it’s being canceled due to low viewership) Deadly Class is a teen murder drama set in the late ‘80s starring Lana Condor, which makes it sound like it was engineered in a lab to appeal to me. Literally my friend and I were in the middle of watching Schitt’s Creek, which I adore, and she was like “well I heard about this show called Deadly Class” and described it and I was like fuck Schitt’s Creek we’re watching this. It had a 64% on Rotten Tomatoes, which usually makes me nervous, but I was literally like “I don’t care because I know I’m going to love it.” 

And well. I did not love it. 

I truly do not understand how one fucks up “teenagers (mostly) of color go to murder boarding school in the late ‘80s” that bad (I mean the Russo brothers are involved and they fuck up everything they touch so perhaps it was just that). I haven’t read the comic the show is based on but it does appear that a *lot* of the issues of the show stem from the comic, which is...disappointing. Basically, our MC, Marcus, starts off the show homeless after his group home burned down (and it’s heavily implied that he was the one to do it) and gets hunted down by these elite teenage murderers who invite them to their murder school. 

Already, numerous problems are starting to show themselves. First of all, Marcus is Latino, which, yes, it’s very cool that the MC is Latino, except he is literally the white-passingest man I’ve ever seen in my life, and I’ve seen my dad. I didn’t realize that he was Latino until they showed his extremely stupid backstory in a shitty animated sequence and whoever was voicing his dad did this really, really thick Nicaraguan accent and I was like wait a damn minute. So then, I looked it up, and the guy playing Marcus is named Benjamin Wadsworth, which immediately made me think that they had pulled a Noah Centineo and made me think this fully white actor was half Latino (and yes, Latinos can be white, but I think Marcus is supposed to be a nonwhite Latino, and I thought Benjamin Wadsworth was both white and non-Latino). But you know, as an light skinned ethnically ambiguous mixed kid myself, I thought I owed it to him to dig a little deeper, and turns out our pal Ben is mixed (also, he’s like six months older than me and married, which is a trip). And like, okay, I guess I’m glad they didn’t get a white non-Latino man to play a Latino character, but they literally got the whitest looking Latino they could think of to play him. He originally auditioned for Billy. Billy’s the token white. And the producers were like “wait you have Latino ancestry?” (how they found that out I don’t fucking know) and let him go for Marcus. And like. Okay. The character in the comics is light-skinned but he does not look white, and Benjamin is not a good enough actor for them to just pass on the actors who surely auditioned for that role and were more visibly Latino but like. Okay, I guess. 

Second of all, this show is mega racist and it starts to reveal itself when you look at how the murder kids are styled in literally their first appearance. What struck me the most was the fact that the Latina (whose name is fucking Maria, for heaven’s sake) was wearing a sexy red dress and Day of the Dead makeup, which, I’m sorry, huh? That just so happens to be the Mexican girl’s murder outfit? I’ve tried to give them the benefit of the doubt and speculate that maybe she wears it to like, subvert people’s expectations, but at this point idk how this is subverting anyone’s expectations nor why she’d be so invested in that. Also, she’s supposed to be a teenager. It’s fucked up to sexualize any of your child characters but it really hits different when it’s your Latina character (and yeah, I know the actress playing Maria isn’t a teenager, but still, it’s the principle of the thing). And then of course, the Black guy, Willie (no he’s not related to Billy they were just like yeah two guys with rhyming names in our main cast sounds legit) is a gangbanger dude who talks the way that white people think Black people talk. I keep waiting for this guy to have one line that’s not complete garbage, but I’m five episodes deep and so far nada, which sucks so bad because there’s like, kernels of an interesting character buried in this horrible racist trope. Also, they had him sleep with a N*zi. I hate it here. Lana Condor (her character’s name is Saya) gets off fairly okay, at least in this first shot (they don’t have her wearing a kimono to go murder people, thank fuck), but the way she behaves is super weird, like kinda flirty towards Marcus, kinda badass but not enough to actually do anything, etc. Billy’s white so they couldn’t make him a racist caricature or anything but I have no idea why he’s here. See, instead of talking about the real politics of the real world, Deadly Class makes up fake prejudice that honestly makes the lok bender/nonbender bullshit look sensible. Maria, Willie, and Saya are Legacies, which means that their families are established murderers (fun fact: the N*zi girl is also a Legacy, because her father murdered hundreds of civil rights activists. And the characters of color align themselves with her. I don’t understand.) Billy, and later Marcus when he decides to go to murder school, are Rats, meaning they have no affiliation with established murder groups. So, in this show, the people of color have privilege over the (mostly white) Rats. Make it make sense. Further, this means that Maria, Saya, and Willie should have absolutely no reason to hang out with Billy, and yet they do because the Russo brothers have heard that the kids these days like the found family trope, so they put five unlikely friends in a room together and insinuated that they could all be besties. I swear, this show is the La Croix of found family tho, in that there is absolutely no flavor whatsoever. None of the characters develop into a found family. Saya is bound to care for Marcus for reasons, Maria is using him, Willie is also using him, and Billy is only his friend because they’re both Rats. Saya and Maria are already friends (and honestly their friendship is the most compelling thing in the whole show). There are no other connections between the characters. But they’re totes a found family!!!!/s

Also, they don’t let Saya be mean. Every character says “oh Saya’s such a bitch” but do we ever see Saya being a bitch??? No! Saya is literally just a nice girl who is kinda quiet sometimes and murders people and has a tragic backstory. There’s an argument to be made for Maria being more bitchy than her tbh. And like, fine, if you want Saya to be nice, she can be nice, but stop telling me she’s mean then!!! If you’re gonna tell me that I’m gonna get to see mean Lana Condor in a leather jacket in this show then deliver bitch. 

There’s truly so much more I could talk about (Chico??? What the fuck is Chico’s arc???? What in the actual hell were they thinking when they were writing anything to do with Chico????? my DUDES WHAT IN THE SAM HELL. also making Billy straight was so fucking stupid he’s literally gay come on now, also Master Lin is so fucking useless what is he even doing here) but instead I’m going to outline the version of Deadly Class my friend and I have been talking about while we watch the inferior real Deadly Class. 

lots of things are the same actually because there are some elements of the show that have potential. Marcus is still homeless at the beginning, everybody still thinks he burned down the group home but he didn’t, Willie is still a pacifist, he and Marcus are still partners for their first murder school assignment, Saya’s mean (but like actually), Billy still has green hair and is the token white of the group (although a Billy of color.....thinking), and they all hate Reagan

in an ideal world Willie and Maria would have different names (Willie bc his name rhymes with Billy’s and that’s fucking stupid, also Willie is just a terrible name in general, Maria partially because it sounds way too similar to Marcus and I don’t understand why the guy who wrote this couldn’t make his characters have different sounding names, and partially because no Latina character of mine is going to be named fucking Maria), but for the purposes of this outline I’ll keep their names the same for clarity.

Marcus doesn’t initially have his rep. He’s on the streets when he sees a girl his age (Saya) come out of this elevator in the back of a restaurant brandishing a sword, and decides to go into the elevator, sees the stash of weapons, and decides to steal one so he can fend for himself better. 

also keeping the detail of Rory murdering a bunch of homeless kids, but now Marcus knows that Rory is actively hunting him down. 

in the process of robbing the school’s weapons collection, Marcus figures out that it’s a murder school

Master Lin catches Marcus robbing the school, they fight, Master Lin overpowers Marcus and ties him up. He says the weapons are for students only, and Marcus says he’s applying. Lin asks what his qualifications are, and Marcus says “you know that group home that burned down three months ago? all the kids that died? I started the fire.” 

(also no shade to Benjamin Wadsworth but in this version he is not playing Marcus. Marcus is not white-passing)

Master Lin initially doesn’t believe him, but Marcus presses on and eventually convinces Master Lin that this is really what happened, and so Lin welcomes him to murder school. 

Marcus’s first class is Poisons, and his lab partner is Billy, who takes a shine to him and shows him around school. There’s no Legacy/Rat nonsense, but you do have normal high school drama adapted slightly for murder school. Maria is the prettiest and most popular girl in school, Saya is the mean girl/valedictorian, Willie is the jock, and Billy’s the punky weirdo. 

Marcus is, of course, the new kid with a reputation to live up to. 

Things kind of fall apart when Willie and Marcus are paired up for an assignment: to seek revenge on somebody. 

also Willie’s backstory is extremely different. his dad was a Black Panther, and he was murdered by the FBI when Willie was a kid. distraught, his mom moved to Texas, where she started working a corporate job and rose really high in the ranks. To maintain her status in the company, she had to do some really horrible things, including working with the FBI to take down other civil rights activists. Willie found out about this and was absolutely horrified. his mother insisted she was doing this so that he could have a better life, but he refused to listen to her, and ran away, and ended up at murder school. 

Willie got into murder school because Lin knows who his mom is, and assumes that Willie is just as cutthroat as she is. he gains a reputation as well. 

also, Willie’s extremely wealthy, and this shows in the way he dresses (preppy jock vibes)

you don’t find out about this backstory for a minute tho bc unlike Albert Kim and the Russo Brothers, I can wait until the right opportunity presents itself for a backstory drop. 

ok anyway back to what I was saying earlier

they have to seek revenge on somebody. Marcus asks Willie if there’s anybody he wants revenge on, and Willie very sincerely says no. Marcus scoffs at him and says he’s clearly had a very easy life, to which Willie replies, “Well, who do you want revenge on?” 

Marcus immediately says, “Rory.” 

So they track Rory down, and since Marcus hasn’t actually killed anybody, he hands the weapons over to Willie. Willie frowns and says that he has nothing against this dude he’s never met before, so Marcus should be the one to hurt him. Marcus says that this is a group project and Willie’s got to pull his weight, and they get into an argument

the argument gets loud, and Rory hears them fighting and starts chasing them. 

in the midst of the chase, both of them divulge their secrets to one another. Willie laughs hysterically and says that they deserve each other bc they both lied to get where they are, and now they’re going to die because of it

Rory backs them into a corner, and Marcus uses one of the swords he tried to steal earlier to shank Rory

They throw the body in a dumpster, and after this, they’re friends, and Marcus decides he’ll fit right in at murder school. 

ok so that was only one episode but things to look forward to in the version of Deadly Class that only exists in me and my friend’s heads: Marcus dealing with the emotional and moral fallout of his first murder, Willie trying to figure out what it means to be a pacifist in a world so hellbent on doing violence towards him, Saya being mean to everyone except Maria, Maria convincing Saya to relax and have fun, the gang bonding in a Breakfast Club style situation adapted for murder school and making a joke about how this is like the Breakfast Club because it’s the 80s and the movie just came out, Saya and Maria falling in lesbians, Marcus and Saya being depressing edgelord besties, Billy being gay and fighting his abusive father, Marcus and Billy being uncool weirdo bffs, Willie and Maria rolling their eyes at Marcus and Saya’s cynicism, Billy coming out to Marcus and talking about his experiences being gay, which makes Marcus think “hang on, why do I relate to that?”, Willie seeing Marcus make a sarcastic comment about kissing a guy and having a crisis, Marcus and Willie falling in love, the gang taking a road trip to Vegas to murder Billy’s dad and giving Billy a gnc thrift store makeover on the way, and eventually the gang murdering the shit out of Ronald Reagan. 

[sepublic]

Nekrone’s Rahi

           (Note: Nekrone is the headcanoned name I’ve given the Makuta of Stelt, for fanon reasons.)

           Nekrone had a very utilitarian philosophy and perspective, when it came to Rahi. Like some Makuta, he questioned the need for their existence, and while he didn’t outright disagree with Mata Nui… He tried to create his own meaning and justifications, in the absence of any provided by the Great Spirit.

           It was not enough for his Rahi to merely, simply exist- There was that existential dread and question, of why they were there? What did they provide, what were they for… Nekrone couldn’t imagine simply living just as-is, there was something they had to do, do to prove and earn their existence, and make it worthwhile! Coupled with his confusion on the purpose of Rahi, it was up to Nekrone to provide an explanation for their existence, when their own existence was an inarguable decree by the Great Spirit himself. As a result, most of Nekrone’s Rahi started off as rather social, utilitarian creatures… His Rahi were the kind of animals easily domesticated, for they were designed to be used by the sapient species and civilizations of the Matoran Universe.

           Nekrone was initially pure-hearted, genuine, and well-meaning with his intent. He wanted his Rahi to provide things for the sapient beings of this world, so he designed them to be incredibly beneficial. Many of his Rahi were highly nutritious, caloric creatures, easily herded- Their natures begged them to be domesticated by civilizations as livestock to feed upon. Nekrone’s Rahi naturally and quickly produced plentily, encouraging Matoran and other beings to control and harvest their populations constantly, in order to keep them from overgrowing. Nekrone’s Rahi didn’t have to just die to provide usage, either- They also provided milk, fur, and luxurious feathers and ivory for decoration.

           His domesticated Rahi were easily tamed, and often were used to perform heavy manual labor, transporting goods and beings. Quite a few noble, hardy steeds had been devised by Nekrone to serve the people of the Matoran Universe. There was a hierarchy in his mind, an ideal one where Rahi served the civilizations of this world- Surely this was what Mata Nui meant, when he ordained the Rahi from the Makuta! Nekrone’s Rahi were tools and resources for Matoran and other species, and if all else failed, a person could at least sell their Rahi for some money to get along in life.

           As many people grew to appreciate and use Nekrone’s Rahi, he himself felt a sense of importance and began seeing himself almost like a caretaker of sorts… And as we all know, the Makuta didn’t exactly become humbler over time. And because Nekrone was so fixated on directly providing for people, it led to him breaking the barriers, and closing the distance between the Makuta and the lesser societies they otherwise avoided. Nekrone took deliberate criticism and feedback by societies on his Rahi, on how to make them more useful and beneficial. At times, he responded to specific needs by designing a Rahi species that would help- If a population was cold, he’d create a species of Rahi that provided plenty of calories and also a heavy wool lining for coats.

           Many of his brethren saw Nekrone as someone who was too coddling of the herds of society, too pleasing and appeasing. They saw Nekrone, a Makuta, as being too much at the whim of others- It was rather disgraceful. Miserix himself questioned if Nekrone could make the difficult decisions for the greater good… He was not here to service the people of this world, not necessarily. It all seemed antithetical to the wilderness and nature, Nekrone’s domesticated beasts.

           But alas, even someone as well-meaning as Nekrone, eventually fell. As he became more receptive of others and responded personally to needs and desires… Inevitably, he had a few of his own, especially as the Brotherhood began to grow. He wanted to provide for his own organization, so he asked for a thing or two, here or there, in exchange for providing a new Rahi species. His benefactors always happily obliged, and Nekrone became versed in making deals, getting the most bang for his buck… He began to operate almost like a business that took commissions, offering his services here or there- The Brotherhood’s resources weren’t infinite, after all.

           Nekrone even began collaborating with other Makuta, helping them here or there with something they needed- For a price, of course! Like many Makuta, he decided it was only fair that such noble beings such as themselves get monetary payment for their righteous actions. And while Miserix raised an eye at this idea of conducting business between the other Makuta, he let it pass… Once, Chirox commissioned Nekrone to create a species of Rahi that could be compatible with his Visorak Horde, to prove their capability to co-exist. For the right accommodations, Nekrone created the Colony Drone, itself a domesticated type of Rahi meant to be herded by the Visorak for sustenance. On their own in the wild, the Colony Drones were helpless creatures that died, nor could they fend for themselves- This happened to many of his domestic Rahi, alas. Over time, this weakness became deliberate, so people would have to rely on Nekrone for a source of Rahi, instead of just letting species procreate in the wild to later choose from…

           Then Nekrone was assigned to the island of Stelt. The constantly-feuding clans looked to him for war beasts and other useful Rahi, and Nekrone obliged. He felt bad about selling to just one clan, so he sold to the rest to make things fair, and ended up contributing to the chaos and bloodshed. One way or another, he saw his Rahi as cattle to serve others… And this sentiment began to apply to sapient species he saw as ‘lesser’- Such as a powerful species of clawed, multi-armed warriors on Stelt. A species hierarchy began to develop amongst the nobles, brutes, and these gladiators, and Nekrone saw it as only sensible… And this led to his allowance, and eventual participation, in slavery.

           The rest is history. Stelt developed a culture of greed and bargaining, that both influenced Nekrone and vice-versa. He became a ruthless opportunist, playing upon the conflicts of others so both sides would come to him, and only Nekrone would benefit in the end, while others tore one another to shreds with their war beasts. His Rahi had short lives and impending expiration dates, often forcing groups to constantly buy more and more creatures from Nekrone to replenish their diminishing supplies, as his domesticated Rahi became almost completely dependent upon owners to actually thrive.

           Nekrone became infamous as a savvy, yet untrustworthy dealmaker- When one referred to a ‘Deal with the Makuta’, it was Nekrone that the saying specifically referred to. Many found themselves in his debt. And Nekrone, he converted the role of his Rahi as helpful, utilitarian tools, and completely transitioned them into marketable products. You know that “I can milk you” meme? That was Nekrone towards his own creations. He changed his Rahi to provide more monetary gain and resources for both himself and his customers- Their entire existence and function designed towards producing a specific resource, more a manufacturing machine than a living being with its own life.

          And as Nekrone created Rahi for utilitarian purposes, he also designed them for luxury as well- He created adorable, beautiful pets that others would beg to keep. These pets were designed to be consumer-friendly, but as pets could not function in the wild, dying and/or providing a negative impact to the local ecosystem. Nekrone searched for every possible way to extract monetary gain from his creations. The art of Rahi-making had been converted almost entirely into a highly-expensive, yet lucrative, business for himself. Nekrone sought to appeal to a wide demographic…

          And this also led to him ordering the extinction, or at least endangerment, of other Rahi species and even machines so others would rely on his own creatures more. While some Makuta were impressed by Nekrone’s devious cleverness, others were disgusted by his lack of integrity- Mutran once accused him of being a sellout in multiple definitions of the term. After all, Nekrone was also infamous for occasionally engaging in business with competitors and even outright enemies to the Brotherhood of Makuta, such as the Dark Hunters…

           Following Nekrone’s death by Miserix, and the transition into a new society on Spherus Magna, there has been concern about the preservation status of Nekrone’s creatures. Many of them have met their expiration dates, and without their creator to provide more, his species are nearing the possibility of extinction. While many Onu-Matoran have adapted by preserving countless specimens in indefinite stasis, many societies dependent upon Nekrone’s Rahi have turned to Miserix for answers. They figure Miserix can reverse-engineer Nekrone’s creations, and are correct… Miserix himself has both access to Nekrone’s memories, having absorbed him, but is also clever and savvy enough to figure it out on his own anyway.

          He’s been catching up on what he’s missed out on over the years, and is rather disgusted by Nekrone’s opportunistic philosophy in designing Rahi by treating them as products- Subsequent iterations of the same species have been redesigned to have longer-lasting lifespans, and be more capable of surviving in the wild. Still, as society and its roles change, Miserix has admittedly taken some of Nekrone’s original sentiments to heart, even if he’ll make sure not to stoop to that same opportunistic greed either. The Makuta caused so much damage and took so much- Miserix wants to put some good out into the world and reinstate a balance, so directly providing for the societies of Spherus Magna and taking their feedback into account is a good start.

[fishymom-art]

How do u created hate u girl? :o

AW YEAH, TIME TO MAKE A LOOOONG POST WITH ILLUSTRATIONS!!!!

All my stories begin with me creating a main character and then building a world around them. Same with HUGirl, but it was a liiiiittle bit funnier. In the beginning Diana was just... well, me.

Thhhat right, the original design of Diana and her character herself is how I used to draw myself back in 2016, when I first started calling myself FishyMom!

I drew myself in Ford Pines’ (from Gravity Falls, yes) outfit and with gills, because I was in Undertale fandom and I was in loooove with Undyne. I used to have a group chat with my friends who also liked Undertale and at some point they started calling me FishyMom, because I was bossy, caring and had gills, apparently. 

This design, as well as the nickname, stuck with me for a long time. At some point, I decided to make a character out of this design.

I called her Ford. You know. Because of the obvious thing XD. But I didn’t have a world for her yet.

Then I had a lot of things going on. In around 2014-2015 I was going to write two books about this world called Mirror World or Mirror Side. Some kind of shadows, who were assigned to you since your birth, would lead you into this world if you were unhappy. Mirror World has everything you ever wanted to have, creates a wonderful, flawless life and... brainwashes you completely into hailing the king of this world who harvests your powers to break out of the Mirror World and conquer the other side???? aka Magical Cult Kingdom, nothing else to say. 

Ford was going to be a right-hand-man of the king and had his mark on her face which meant that he sees through her eyes. But I never finished the book (in fact, I tried rewriting it 3 times and did not succeed) and didn’t really know how to put Ford in, since I already had a hecking lot of characters who were much more important to the story than she was. But she was still kinda there in the story.

(btw, the king’s name was Gaskard, which is Alex Gaskarth’s (vocalist of All Time Low) name written wrong. I didn’t know it was his name, my classmates were joking around when they said it when I was asking for a villain’s name. I was on their concert in 2017 uwu)

I was thinking about a sequel of the book at the same moment as I was still not writing the first one XD. And now it gets interesting.

In the first book, there had to be this girl, who was one of main character’s young sister and student. The second book was going to be about her and her twin brother. Her name was Elizabeth. 

The first picture is Elizabeth with her twin-brother, Noelle and second picture is the old Elizabeth.

A lot of things later, I decided to get rid of the story and make a whole new story for a sequel. But I was still left with Elizabeth. And I made her Ford. (and I made Noelle her sister instead of brother I guess...)

At this point, I knew what I wanted to do. I wanted Ford to be a scientist. I wanted her to be a warrior. I wanted her to be the characters I was inspired by when I was creating her. And I knew the story I was going to give her.

But I still didn’t have a world. And I still didn’t have a name.

And then I did a thing

There was a blog on Tumblr before hate-u-girl that had something to do with Ford. And I posted comics there. And you could or could not have seen at least one of the stupid comics I drew calling them all under the name HUGirl, which was literally Human, but a “girl” instead of “man”. And I mean this one...

my eyes hurt from the art style and from tHE AMOUNT OF NOTES IT HAS. LIKE, LITERALLY, I JUST HAD TO SEARCH FOR IT, LAST TIME I SAW THIS ABOMINATION, IT HAD 3K NOTES, DO YOU UNDERSTAND THAT THIS IS MY MOST VIEWED ARTWORK??? MY LEGACY???? [heavy breathing] IS IT BECAUSE I TAGGED ZUTARA THERE??? IS THIS WHY?????

- ok, screaming aside XD

Yup! That was Ford! And there was also Huboy, who then went on to be Robert! (hoooo boi....). They were partners right from the beginning!!!!

And I finally started drawing the actual comic. THIS, everybody, is two ONLY pages that were made for the first ever try on “HUGirl” comic.

Ah, they were such babies....

The main antagonist of the comic, however, was someone fully new and someone who was also first just the way I drew myself.

Fishy Mom. Yes yes, you heard it right. Fishy Mom IS a character. That’s why at some point I asked people to call me RK (Ar-Key or, for Russians, Er-Ka), because that was a little weird. And she had to be some kind of a ruler of fully re-made Mirror World!!! 

I came up with the idea of making her a villain and a separate character after I made a cover on Die House and drew her in that dress for the first time. She evolved to an entity that can transform into your biggest fears (directly or indirectly). And Ford’s greatest fear was (and still is) water and fish.

Strange and unpolished, I left the first attempt and started drawing the second one, already including my baby Adelaide, who has a much bigger role than you think and I won’t be telling it. (Oh, and Robert’s lasagna appeared there too! Me and my friends made a lot of jokes about this lasagna XDDD)

Here are some of my favorite panels!

“big power with a tiny apartment?”

Diana and Robert were going to be a couple.

it’s a toxic haze all around

LOOK AT THIS BABY!!!

+ bonus of a badass Robert.

There had to be that other character called Complete Failure who has first appeared in this animation I made. All the characters in it are “the original cast” of HUGirl and will always be. I wanted them to be the villain for some time but quickly changed my mind and put Fishy Mom back into the role of the villain. They still remained a very important character to me who you can thank for the story HUGirl is now and will be.

Then Fishy Mom (or rather F-001 aka Fishy Good/Too Good To Be True) got a HuMan FoRm!!!! Yaaaay! Because a cartoony fish in the middle of a sci-fi post-apocalyptic drama would have been pretty weird. Btw, I have no idea at which point it turned into a post-apocalyptic comic, but I had to roll with it, because I put it as genre in WebToon and Idk if I can change it and I already came up with an excuse ahhaha.

My idea was that she put experiments and tried to create humans out of magic and science (i like that mix). This is when the “HU” in HUGirl turned into Human Urge Academy (now, Haze Unity Academy), the research academy on human life, who’s role is to create more humans because they can’t produce them the good-ol’-way anymore XD. And Diana (the “F” in the beginning of every experiment meant “Ford”, btw), alongside other characters, became a part of it and Fishy Mom became Diana’s personal nemesis, who was one of the experiments and wanted to kinda break free. It was still very weird and unpolished but I loved it. I had everything planned, from the beginning to the end and everything in the middle.

The last character I came up with was Susan Whaletaker. And she was anything but the character she is now XD. She was going to be the CEO of HUA and a pretty nice person. [turns to Susan now] NICE PERSON.

I had a lot of other thinking and writing in-between, but now I know exactly what I want to do with the story. And I have all those babes on my side uwu

It’s not a full story since it would have contained a lot of spoilers, but those are all the main events hehe, thank you very much uwu

if you have any other questions, please do ask!

[duker42]

💜Recovering💜 1 of 4

Recovering: Part 1 of 4

*****Warning*****Spoilers Ahead/Manga

Y/N took in the view before her. Grass covered fields stretched before her, gentle hills and scattered trees filling out the landscape. A sense of calm was over area, causing a coil of tension to curl in her gut. Times like these were the most dangerous.

Trouble was coming. Maybe not an Abnormal Titan, like she would have been expecting in years past, but something.

The screen door behind her opened as a petite blonde in a long flowing dress joined her on the porch. Her angelic features were enhanced by the protruding swell under her breasts. Turning towards the expectant mother, Y/N inclined her head slightly.

“Good morning, Your Majesty, did you sleep well?” She turned, taking in the heavily pregnant woman’s appearance.

“Y/N, for the LAST time, it’s Historia! I order you to call me Historia.” The young monarch giggles, flashing a mischievous grin to the older girl.

She supposed it was alright. She had known Historia since she had joined the Scouts under the name Christa Lentz all those years ago. How things have changed.

Commander Hanji had assigned Y/N to watch over Historia as she entered her final months of pregnancy, worried that the Yeagerists might take some action against the mother-to-be in a blind show of loyalty to Eren.

It was a duty to be taken seriously. That was why Y/N had tried to establish boundaries. But the girl who once giggled over gossip and played silly games with her in the their barracks block after lights out refused to let them slip into predetermined roles. Sighing, Y/N gives into the inevitable and flashes a light hearted grin. “Okay, HISTORIA, how’d you sleep?”

Groaning, Historia rubbed her lower back. “Let’s just say I will be happy when I can sleep in some other position. And I don’t have this one trying to practice for ODM training in my womb.”

“Sit down, You’ll feel better.” She lead the girl over to a rocking chair and guided her into the seat before looking back across the open fields. Scanning the area, a bit of movement from the river caught her attention. She narrowed her eyes, trying to determine if it was an animal that was moving in the brush or approaching danger. She gripped the handles of her swords loosely, trying to move casually as to not upset the woman beside her.

The movement continued, and Y/N began to make a out figure pulling something from the river. “Historia, did you give permission for anyone to travel by river or fish lately?”

Glancing at the direction Y/N was staring, Historia’s eyes widen as she realizes the reasoning behind the question. “No.”

Moving swiftly, Y/N gathers up Historia and rushed back into the farmhouse. Putting her down, she quickly shoves a rifle in the queen’s hand. “You haven’t forgotten how to shoot, I know. Stay here and stay low. I’ll call out to you. Whatever I shout, don’t hesitate. You aren’t a soldier any longer, you are our Queen.” When she nods silently, Y/N slips back out onto the porch, preparing to defend her friend and liege to her dying breath.

Silently slipping down the front porch steps, Y/N makes her way to the well worn path that leads to the river. She was finally close enough to recognize the green cloak wrapped around the now soaked figure, still concentrating on something on the ground. As she starts to pull her blades slowly from their sheath, the figure looks up and spots Y/N.

Sagging with relief, she shoves the blades back to their resting position and rushes forward, fear of a threat now well past. “Commander Hanji!”

Hanji’s single brown eye widened when she saw Y/N. She looked down at the item she was clutching at and shouted for the girl. “Come help me! I need to get him in the house!”

When Y/N reached Hanji, she realized the object that Hanji had been struggling with was a person, a man, horribly wounded. A long deep slash across the man’s face from his eyebrow to below his lip was still oozing blood. Fragments of metal were sticking out of the other cheek. As she came closer, she realized that his right hand was steadily dripping blood, the ends of his first two finger were severed. Reaching the frantic woman, she realized she wasn’t looking at just any wounded man.

“Levi....” She gasped.

“Come on, Y/N. Help me.” Hanji snaps her out of inaction. Y/N reaches down and pushes her obviously exhausted Commander back and scoops the short statured Captain up into her arms.

Struggling with his surprising weight, she grunted, shifting him carefully as she hurried towards the farmhouse. “Fuck, he’s heavy. What does he do, eat rocks?” She blithely comments, trying desperately to not panic at the critical situation they found themselves in.

“Historia! Quick, get hot water and towels! Get the medical bag! Put them in my room!” She shouts as she gets closer. “What happened?” Hanji flinched at the question.

“Thunder spear, I think, I’m not exactly sure. But Zeke had transformed and I found Levi next to the river like this. Piece of shit Floch wanted to shoot him, so I dove into the river with him and managed to get him here.”

“And the monkey?” Y/N growled, referring to Zeke’s Beast Titan.

“Bastard still lives.” Hanji ground out, her teeth gritted in anger.

“Okay, then our little Captain here can’t die today. Let’s get him inside and fixed up to fight another day.”

Pushing into the farmhouse, she steadily makes her way to the bedroom she had been staying in. The top floor, back bedroom had never seemed so far away as she carried her heavy burden up the narrow stairs, careful not to injure him further. Reaching the room, she found Historia busily arraigning all the requested materials and stoking the fire to life in the hearth.

Laying him down in her bed, she steps back and takes a breath. Now the real challenge was beginning. Reaching into her medical bag that she had prepared for the birth of Historia’s child, she begins to lay out all the tools and medicines. Hanji came over and started pulling Levi’s water logged boots off his feet.

“We have to get his clothes off. I can’t see if he has any other injuries with them on.” Her hurried words betrayed her panic. Quickly grabbing the taller woman’s hands, Y/N stills her. “Hanji, go shower and change into dry clothes. I can handle this for now. We can’t afford for you to get sick. Historia, take her.” Confidant they would heed her, she turns back to the unconscious man before her.

Slipping a dangerously sharp knife from the sheath in her boot, she murmurs an apology as she swiftly cuts the elite soldier’s clothes from his body. Flinging the sodden material on the floor, she begins to dry him off, looking for wounds more pressing than the ones on his face and hand.

Finding none, and relieved to find no bruising to indicate internal bleeding yet, she covers his naked form with a thick blanket. Her movements graceful and fluid, she surveys the fingers, her main cause for worry at the moment. The bleeding on his face had slowed, but his missing digits needed to be dealt with immediately.

Slipping a long blade into the fire, she sighs as she realizes cauterizing the wound is his best option. He would come back to life and gut her unmercifully if she allowed the notoriously fastidious man to die of an infection.

When the metal was red hot, Y/N carefully held his hand, her body practically laying on his own to prevent movement. While he was still unconscious, Captain Levi was dangerous, and she could take no chance that he would come to during this and hurt himself or her. Wincing as she touched the hot steel to his open flesh, the sizzling and burning smell etching themselves into her mind. She felt him jerk beneath her, but thankfully his eyes remained closed.

Washing the tender skin, she put a healing salve on his now shorter fingers and carefully wrapped them in gauze. Turning her attention to his face, she wept internally over the damage. She had always believe the stoic, crass man to be breathtakingly handsome. Few others thought as she did, but it never bothered her. But, even as horrible as his wounds looked now, she didn’t think that she would ever be able to view him as hideous.

Shaking her head, she scoffed at her foolishness. He needed her to help him right now, not moon over his looks. Going to his right eye, she carefully peeled open the lid and was relieved to see that the cut had not penetrated below. A beautiful grey orb rested unharmed in it’s socket. She was quick to note that there were more blue flecks in the iris at this distance. Smiling at her newfound discovery, she closed the lid and set to cleaning the wound.

Stitching his face had taken longer than she had hoped. She was still working on the lower portion when Hanji came back into the room.

“Check him again for bruising, please” Y/N said, not taking her eyes off the delicate sutures in her hand.

Pulling back the blankets, Hanji rechecked his stomach and chest, not finding any deep bruising. Covering him back up, she silently watched the loyal Scout carefully sew her friend back together. After Y/N had finished that arduous task, she concentrated on the other side, pulling the bits of metal from his skin. Sanitizing and sewing those wounds shut, she smeared the salve over the wounds. Over his eye, she had not stitched the wound, opting to pull the skin closed with some medical glue and cover it with a thick bandage.

Finished with her task, she looked up into the worried coffee colored eye of her friend and leader. Unshed tears gathered as the woman looked down at the bed that held her dearest friend, the last veteran from before the wall fell that she had left. She looked back at Y/N, a newer friend, but no less important to her. “Do you think he will make it?” She whispered, afraid of the answer.

Standing, Y/N gathered Hanji in a fierce hug. “Levi is stronger than all of us. He will make it. He’s just going to be pissed that ‘shitty Beast bastard’ is still kicking.” Hanji gave a small chuckle when Y/N used the colorful moniker Levi used when talking about Zeke Yeager.

Hanji pulled away, sighing heavily. “I need to go. They will be looking for us. I need to get back to HQ and figure out how to deal with this. Keep him safe, Y/N. If they find him, they will kill him.”

Nodding solemnly, Y/N gathers the Captain’s ruined clothes and slipped downstairs to give Hanji a few moments alone with Levi. Reaching the kitchen, she finds Historia seated at the table, her troubled gaze settled on the tea cup in front of her. Guessing where the small girl’s trouble thoughts lay, Y/N settled a hand on her slender shoulder. “Levi is still unconscious, but he’ll survive. I know it.”

Sitting down in the opposite chair, she continues. “Hanji is going to be leaving him here. The Yeagerist’s are going to be searching for them. We need to be careful for anyone approaching the house. Trust no one right now.” Her friends face paled at the implications of her statement, but she nodded.

Y/N sat with Historia for a few more minutes, explaining the Captain’s condition and reminiscing with her about the few times they had actually seen the seemingly indestructible man hurt. When the conversation tapered off, Y/N got up and set the ruined clothes out to dry in front of the kitchen hearth.

“When these are dry Historia, if I am watching over the Captain, burn them.” She says, fingering the blood stained cravat she had taken off of him. Pulling it out of the destroy pile, she ignores her common sense and sets the dirty linen in a bowl of cold water to soak. When she turns around, she catches the understanding look on Historia’s face. “He would want us to get the stains out.” Y/N sheepishly explains.

Footsteps on the stairs signal Hanji’s approach. When the tired woman comes into the kitchen, Historia bustles around the room gathering provisions. Y/N hands Hanji a cup of tea she had just poured, liberally adding a splash of whiskey to the brew.

“There are extra horses in the stable. I had them brought here in case of an emergency. Take one, it won’t be missed if someone comes looking.” Y/N tells Hanji. “They are looking for you carrying a wounded man, they won’t act quickly enough to block the road for a lone rider on a a horse.”

Knocking back the tea, she grimaces and hands the cup back to Y/N. “I knew I was right to station you here.” She smiled gratefully as Historia handed her a sack full of food stuffs and a water skin. Placing a hand on Historia’s stomach she looks at both of the women. “Take care of the baby, him and each other. I’ll send word as quickly as I can.” And with that, she walked out of the house towards the stable.

**Time Skip**

After Hanji’s departure, Y/N went to the stables and cleaned the now empty stall. If someone did come looking for the now hunted pair, she wanted to give no reason for suspicion. Satisfied that the stables looked proper, she walked to the river’s edge and started eliminating signs of the wounded man being carried from there to the farmhouse.

Coming back into the house, she made her way to Historia, watching over the sleeping Captain. Settled into a rocking chair beside his bed, the former cadet was reading quietly to the man that had once threatened her to convince her to take her place as queen.

Pausing in her reading, Historia looked at Y/N. “I’ve burned their clothes. Should we burn the boots?”

“No, he wears a size similar to mine. I will just say they are an extra pair if anyone questions it.” For a shorter girl, Y/N had surprisingly larger feet. Looking around the room, she noticed that it was dirty from working on him earlier. “Take a break, I’ll watch over Levi and clean the room. The last thing we need is him waking up to a dirty recovery room. He’ll shit bricks.” She grinned as Historia laughed.

While Historia settled on the porch, Y/N gathered the cleaning supplies. Throwing the bloodied towels in the fire, she carefully wiped down the room, restoring it to it’s before Levi appearance. Stowing the medical supplies away, she retraced her steps through the house, making sure there were no tell-tell drops of blood. Satisfied that their tracks had been sufficiently covered, she returned to the kitchen and began to make dinner.

Humming quietly as she peeled and chopped vegetables, her thoughts drifted back to the man upstairs. She was worried about how he was going to take loosing his fingers. She hoped he would look at it like she did. Most soldiers would be completely at loss with their dominant hand damaged, but Levi held his swords differently in battle. Using the other fingers on his hand was natural to him, so she didn’t believe it was too big of an issue. No, his real problem would be holding his tea cup. Unique in most every aspect of his life, drinking tea was no different. Rather than holding it by the handle like most, Levi gripped the rim of the cup with his entire hand. The loss of those fingers would definitely affect that.

She snorted to herself as she moved the pot of hearty stew over the flames. They had nothing to worry about if the primary concern about their strongest soldier’s injury was how he was going to adjust to drinking his tea. Wiping down her work station, she fixed a tray with all the necessary items to make tea in her room and headed upstairs.

Entering the room, she found that he had not moved. His breathing still steady, as if he were sleeping. She wondered if he had a head injury from being thrown in the blast. There had been plenty of soldiers that showed no sign of injury but went to sleep and never woke up. The possibility terrified her.

Setting the tea kettle on the hook, she moved it close enough to the fire to stay warm, but far enough away to not boil. Setting up a cup for whenever he decided to come back to reality, she stopped for a moment to take a good look at the man she had been caring for. She noticed that his neck had a smudge of dirt on it and his hair had debris in it from the river. Damnit...he wouldn’t be comfortable like this if he knew. Even when he was about to fall out from exhaustion, he had always dragged himself off to clean up before anything else after a mission. A tiny coil of dread knotted in her gut. She was going to have to give Levi a bath.

Guilt....that was the feeling in her gut, she thought to herself as she wandered back into the kitchen. Filling a pail full of hot water, she collected more towels and a rag before going back up the stairs. She was feeling guilty because she was going to see him naked. When she had cut his clothes off of him, she had been focused on the injuries. Now that the danger had seemingly passed, she was ashamed to admit to herself that she was a little curious.

Setting the pail beside the bed, she went to her bathroom and got her soap. Something she had found in an upscale store the last time she was in Wall Sina, it had a heavenly mixture of lemon and rosemary in it. She hoped he wouldn’t shit at smelling like a girl when he woke up. Smirking, she came back over and contemplated the best way to go about her task. Modesty called for just reaching under the covers to blindly swipe at his skin, but knowing how meticulous he was, Y/N sensed she would be doing him an injustice if she washed him that way.

Deciding to start on his hair, she wet the raven locks as best she could and lathered the soap through it. Feeling the surprisingly soft strands as her fingers massaged his scalp, she wondered how he would react if he were to wake up at this moment. Would it feel good to him, or would he bat her hands away from him? Lifting his head, she placed an empty basin beneath him and scooped clean water over his hair, rinsing the suds out. Toweling the moisture from his disheveled hair, she swapped the pillow beneath his head, giving him a clean place to lay.

Now onto his body. As she grit her teeth, she scolded herself for acting like a child. Levi’s voice rang through her head. ‘Just get it over with brat.’ Steeling her nerves and with a quick glance at his face to make sure he was still out, she pulled the covers completely off of her Captain.

Hard. That would be the word she used to describe him. While many people discounted Levi due to his height, his form was nothing to scoff at. His lean frame was covered in taunt muscle. His shoulders were surprisingly broad and his chest was smooth and absent hair. Small light scars from old injuries were scattered across him, but added to his appeal rather than detracted. Defined pecs led down to chiseled abs, so many ripples in his stomach telling of the hard training he put in. The deep v of his hips led down, and Y/N felt herself blushing a deep crimson as she tore her gaze away from his anatomy. With a quick rush of air escaping her lung, she knew she would NEVER forget that sight. It seemed to be disproportionate to the rest of him, even when asleep. She would be a little afraid if she ever saw the man aroused. His thick coiled thighs spoke to all the years of ODM gear use and tight calves leading down to surprisingly cute feet.

‘Okay, drooling over, start washing the man’ She hastens over to the water, plunging the rag in to wet it. Wringing a little water out, she runs it over the inert body. Wetting it again, she soaps up the rag and begins at his neck, carefully washing the filth from him. Moving him gently, she contorts his body to reach as much of him as she can without turning him over. Sliding the wash cloth over him, she begins to hum to distract herself from her actions. When she reaches his waist, she pauses, unsure if touching him there was the correct corse of action. Remembering all the times he knocked Hanji out and bathed her, she shrugs, realizing he will understand the practicality of his situation.

Careful to avoid any roughness, always hearing about how sensitive they are in that area, Y/N gently washes him. Startled a bit as that one area moved at her touch, she quickly moved lower, washing his legs and feet with mechanical precision. Finishing up, she rinses the rag and wipes the soap off of his body with another run of the rag. After drying him off, she covers him in a new blanket, pulling the warm material up to his chest, anchoring it with his arms.

Coming back down the stairs with the pail and basins, she meets Historia at the bottom. Her eyes were wide and panicked.

“Someone’s coming.”

Part 2 Here

Part 3 Here

Part 4 Here

Mobile MasterList

[dragonrajafanfiction]

Dragon Dancer Chapter 20: Star of Cassell

a/n: The secret to writing good training montages is to make them as cute as all get out and then immediately have the student apply what they learn.

Previous Chapter

Go back to the Beginning

Johann and I walked in silence back towards my dorm room. The reality of what had happened set in now that things were quiet. I couldn’t believe I had just lost it in front of the entire school and someone recorded it no less.

On top of that then forcing Johann to be my boyfriend in front of everyone? Wasn’t that what I was trying to avoid someone doing to me? I was such a child.

Johann stopped walking so I stopped.

“How did you submit the answer to the quiz question so quickly?” He asked me.

“Because I saw that tablet before. While I was gone.” I said, not looking up, keeping my eyes on my hands.

“People study years to read an ancient text like that.”

I chewed my lip and tilted my head away from him.

“Meixiu…” His voice was barely above a whisper. “Please tell me.”

“I can’t. I really can’t. But…” I took a deeper breath. “You’re really smart. I believe you’ll figure it out. But when you do? Don’t tell me you did.”

I raised my eyes to him. I could almost hear his clockwork brain ticking away.

“Alright. Send me your class schedule. Most of the classes are cancelled because the teachers are out on assignment, but members of Lionheart will give you supplemental lessons to catch you up.”

“Thanks.”

“No thanks needed.” We continued until I reached my dorm, he handed me his phone number on a slip of paper. “I’ll be back here at 6 am. Get to sleep.”

I set my alarm to 5 am. And when I woke up I saw a message with him. He’d planned out my entire day down to the minute! 

“He’s picked out meals for me? Isn’t that a little controlling? Geez…” I muttered scrolling up. “How long did it take him to do this?” I frowned a little to myself.

I twisted my hair into an updo and dressed in my Cassell uniform. I put my star of Cassell in the nightstand drawer. If anyone needed confirmation that I’d won it, there was video tape.

I made it outside ten minutes to six and found him waiting for me already. “You’re early. Good.” He said.

“How long were you planning to stand here?” I asked with a puzzled grin.

“It’s customary at Cassell for boyfriends to walk their girlfriends to class.”

“Oh.” He started walking and I followed him. “They have a lot of traditions like that, huh?”

“Like what…?”

“Old school traditions. Like… Old boy’s school traditions.”

“Maybe now that you’re here that will change. You bested Mingfei in one of the challenges. It’s bound to have an effect.”

“You think so?”

“Cassell College is heavily skewed toward preferring male students, even the entire gear department is male.” He told me.  “Cassell only stands to benefit if you continue to excel.” 

“Oh, so I guess you’re not upset that I asked you out?”

“No. I was… uh…” A silence while he tried to find the right word. “... caught off guard. I’m sure with the Star alone, you would have been fine.”

The midsummer sun rose over the college. We reached the main campus as the bells tolled the hour. The birds were singing. It was quiet. I lifted my eyes to the students who were watching us go by. Some with curiosity. Others with jealousy. A few others nodded their heads, paying a respectful greeting.

We reached the library, I felt my pulse start to hammer. Johann, who had been reaching for the door, stopped what he was doing. “What’s wrong?”

My mouth opened but nothing came out.

“You don’t want to go in there.”

I shook my head. 

“I didn’t realize.” He lowered his hand. “Then where?”

A place immediately came to mind. “This is going to sound weird. The basketball court.”

He didn’t question it. “Alright. I’ll let Susie know.” He texted as I walked.

“Sorry…” As we distanced ourselves from the library, I found my voice again. “I got scared.”

“I understand. The reason why we have events like the one last night is to desensitize ourselves to what we might face when investigating dragon activity. You didn’t have that opportunity when you were facing that servitor in the library.”

As soon as we got to the courts, he put his phone away. “I have to go. Susie will meet you here. I’ll be back for you at lunch time.”

 I sat on the bench where we first met and smiled at him. 

He didn’t return it. “You’ll be hungry. She won’t go easy on you.” 

I watched him walk away my happy feeling waning. Well, no matter, I’d faced tough teachers before. How hard could she be?

Susie caught up to me, wheeling a wagon full of books behind her. “I can’t believe we’re going to study outside. Don’t you realize that it’s forecast to be in the mid-eighties with some terrible humidity? You give someone the Star of Cassell and, suddenly, they’re a dictator!”

I winced. “I’m sorry. I’m not pushing you around, it’s just that I got scared and Johann…”

“Johann?” She reared up to her full height. “Oh, no, you’re not blaming him for this. Believe me. If it weren’t for that little emblem, he wouldn’t baby you! Who gets scared of a library?” She slammed the books on the bench, her eyes glaring down at me from above her glasses. “You’re his girlfriend for three months. I’m here to at least give you the appearance of being worthy of it!”

“Hey… I…”

She pointed to them. “These are your study materials! You have to read all of these and be ready for the test in three weeks!”

“Three weeks?! That’s insane!”

She brushes me off. “We have to cram nine months of study in the next three if you’re to graduate in time!”

“Wait wasn’t I just behind six months?”

Susie rubbed her nose as if hit by the biggest migraine.

“Nevermind… Dumb question.” I chewed my lip.

“Haha!” She gave a humorless laugh. “Good jokes. Alright, let’s get started. First history, then Genealogy, then Alchemy!”

We spent at least an hour on each, followed by an exercise to make sure I was capturing what I was learning. The minute she saw my mind wandering she snapped her fingers to get my attention. This rubbed me the wrong way but she had a good point. If I was going to live up to what they were asking me to do this would not be easy. Besides, this is nowhere I hadn’t been before. If I could dance the lead role of the Dark King, I could do this.

The heat was blazing by noon and we moved our study under a tree. Johann approached as the clocktower tolled. “Thank you, Susie.”

“Seriously? Don’t mention it.” Susie said, holding out my exam papers to him.

I looked up at him. He was carrying something. “Here, I wasn’t sure what you liked, but these seemed popular.” He said.

“You made her lunch?” Susie whispered. “Don’t you think this is too much?”

“It’s customary for boyfriends to make bento boxes for girlfriends.” His expression was blank, his voice matter-of-fact.

Susie takes a deep breath and smiles. “Oh! That’s true!” She walked away. The glare she tossed over her shoulder at me was pure poison.

My eyes widened slightly. “Oh.” 

He sat next to me handing me the box wrapped in a cloth napkin. He pulled out a red pen and started reading over my exercises, marking and making little notes.

The rice balls and veggies had been crafted into cute little animals! I laughed. “Wow this is really neat! Almost too good to eat!” I smiled over at him but he was focused on grading my paper. “How’d I do?”

“Don’t worry about it. Any deficiencies will be addressed in the next lesson.”

“Right!” I took a bite. It was so good. A perfect blend of sweet and sour and salty. “You’ve known Susie for a long time? I ventured?”

“She’s extremely devoted to Lionheart.” He said.

“To Lionheart. Right.”

“She’s also the number one sniper on campus.” He turned to me as I began choking. “Don’t eat too fast.”

“Sorry.” I took a drink of water. 

“She’ll also be handling your firearms training.” He flipped to the next paper. “If you agree to it. She is a tough teacher.”

“No tougher than some of my ballet instructors.”

He nodded once without looking at me.

“Have you … ever dated…?”

“Can you save questions until after I’m done?” 

“Oh! Sorry…” We spent the rest of the lunch in silence.

“Here, study these notes as well as the homework Susie gave you.” 

I stared at the pages. They were positively bleeding. I would probably need another six hours to study!

“Lancelot will be here soon to do your martial arts training.” He said, standing up.

“Huh? I thought you said you were going to do that?”

He halted, frowning slightly. 

I scrambled to retract what I said. "It’s fine if you can’t! Just because I have that silly star doesn’t mean you’re my slave.” How much of this was because he wanted to and how much of this was because he was obligated? “If you have something you need done, just tell me!”

“Right, I’ll send you my complete schedule for the week.” He said.

“Ah…” That wasn’t what I meant!

Lancelot jogged up, waving enthusiastically. “Hey Carli!” He said, “Ready to go?”

“Don’t work her too hard. She just ate.” He said as he walked away.

“Sure thing, Chairman.” Lancelot watched him go and then grinned down at me. “You certainly know how to make an entrance.”

“I’m feeling kind of terrible now…” I hang my head.

“You should!” He started to laugh. 

His good-humor was exactly what I needed. I stood up. “So what are we going to do?”

“Well we’re going to walk to the left… and then tomorrow, we’re going to walk to the right… Stance and position are just as important in martial arts as they are in ballet. I don’t expect you to have to spend too long on the fundamentals.”

Regardless of what he expected, spending time was exactly what he did. His criticism of my form and posture was constant but I took this much better because I was used to it. By the end of the hour, I was exhausted and I hadn’t done much.

“Good, you’re way above some of the others we drag in here. Enjoy your break.” Lancelot waved over his shoulder. 

I had a block of three hours before study time where I could do whatever I wanted. I returned to my dorm to shower and change clothes. Much to my surprise, Ielia popped out of my necklace, looking very satisfied.

“Oh, have a good day in your dimension?” I asked.

She beckoned me with one finger and then pointed to a pen and then to the wall. “Drawing on the walls again?”

With her help, I traced another rune, larger than what I had done on the wall of the Comemnus condo. Once it was completed, I felt a pull. The blowing of the air from the AC sounded far away, like I’d been plunged underwater. She then had me trace out words, English words.

“Time Dilation. Three hours here = 1 hour outside.”

My jaw dropped. She gave me a thumbs up. Then she put her finger to her lips. I understood. This would be a secret too.

After a little nap, I got back up to study. She watched me, shaking her head and correcting me when I was wrong, adding more information if I needed help. She knew everything I was trying to learn and then some. Cassell was relying on ancient texts and archeological finds. But in her world, dragons were still alive. She even disagreed with some of the books, but she didn’t elaborate because she didn’t want to confuse me.

The next item on my schedule was a video conference oral review after dinner. Johann didn’t prepare this meal for me, instead having it delivered to my dorm.

“Were you able to get any rest?” He asked once I’m connected.

“Yes, a lot.” I noticed the strange whirring sound in the background as well as the strange seating. “Johann are you on a plane?”

“We were called out on a mission earlier today. I can’t talk about this one.”

My heart drops. “Oh… “

“Something the matter?”

“No, I…” I paused. “I just wish I could be there with you.”

“You’ll get there soon. Probably before you know it. Let’s see your progress.”

I focus my mind on the questions, getting all but one correct. Johann’s brow furrowed. “Very good.”

“Thanks!” I grinned.

He stared at me for several seconds. “I guess I shouldn’t expect any less from an S-rank.”

“Hey give me some credit! I worked really hard!”

 “I have to log off now. Schneider’s debriefing us.”

“Alright. Stay safe.”

The next day, Johann wasn’t there to walk with me.

Nor did he return the day after that.  That day, he didn’t call me as scheduled. My heart pounded in my chest as two minutes late turned to three minutes… then four minutes.

Before I could call him, my phone rang. It was EVA. “We have an urgent situation! All S-rank and A-rank are required to report to the Execution Department immediately!”

Next Chapter

[courage-a-word-of-justice]

Akudama 2 - 3 | HypMic 4 | Yashahime 3 | Taiso 2 - 3 | Moriarty 2 | Maou-jou 3

Akudama 2

I think one or two of the reviews I read of this anime picked up the names of each episode are based on movies and it seems they’re right. Namely, episode 1 is Se7en while episode 2 is Reservoir Dogs...so they’re crime movies specifically.

Kanto, Hikari etc. are the names of certain shinkansen.

Playing with your own blood in front of a no violence sign and smoking in front of a no smoking sign…LOL. So edgy and yet simultaneously so fun.

…*blinks* Welp, that OP was…an experience.

…hey, Funi are hypocrites…they gave HypMic a language warning, but not this???

Come to think of it, this anime is already exactly how I’d imagine the HypMic MTC episode to go…but with more cyberpunk, of course.

…why is “are you gay?” an insult…? I thought we were past this point years ago.

…what’s up with these puppets? The shark’s shirt says “fool” on it…

The rabbit and shark’s shirts keep changing every time they spin. When they talk about poverty/rich, the rabbit shirts says “poor” and the shark’s “rich” (or something of the sort). When the shark talks about Kansai burning to the ground, his shirt says “nervousness”.

Wow, Hiroshima vers. 2…Rabbit: peace/shark:war

Hoodlum’s just a sycophant…

…ooh, so if the girl and Hoodlum aren’t part of the plan…they could f*** s*** up?

LOL, plasma shield.

“Lil’ stick”? That’s a jitte! A non-bladed weapon which is still plenty nasty by itself!

Ken the 390??? I knew UraShimaSakataSen were on this ED and I knew this was a rap ED because I heard it in AMQ before I was able to finish this ep, IIRC, but I didn’t expect the guy from BATTLE BATTLE BATTLE....

Taiso 2

A-hah! I was right on the money! Tomoyo is an actress!

Oh, it’s senu. That’s an old-timey way of negating your verbs (it’s shinai now), hence “retires not”.

I think they’re hailing Minamino as the first winner in 45 years if I understood the newspaper article on the screen right…?

Does this mean Minamino will join Leo and Aragaki…? The OP shows him with them.

The AnimeLab translation of the title is “Duelling Samurai”, but the translation on the hardsubs is “Rock-Bottom Samurai”. The word donzoko indicates the latter is correct.

I think Leo said “Rei-chan”, not “Rachel”. It’s a bit hard to hear because he’s eating though…

I think there’s only one line where he doesn’t talk like a ninja in his intro to Ayu and that’s the line where he uses keigo instead.

I think the card says “acupuncturist Kawa????” (can’t read the last character due to Britney’s thumb), but…welp, Britney’s kinda disturbing in their (not sure what pronoun to use) own way. There also appears to be an address in Ikebukuro on the card.

I wouldn’t be surprised if Leo learnt how to speak Japanese fluently from ninja movies – that’s a pretty common anime trope, like in Tada-kun’s Rainbow Samurai case. “Always make your heart rainbow!” and all that jazz.

…so that’s what the card said - Kawamoto Orthopedic Clinic.

“My shoulder would…”

Seriously, this anime is just an excuse to look at Aragaki in different outfits (and also shirtless) and I love it, LOL. (I’m such a simpleton.)

Ah…sometimes, people ask me about the days when I used to learn piano and I bring up the fact there is such a thing as “overpractice”. I thought gymnasts would know when they hit their limits in that regard, but…I guess they don’t because they’re so consumed in their passion, or they can’t see what they’re doing to themselves (because it occurs under the skin and doesn’t ache)…?

Minamino is basically Yurio…LOL.

That’s a cute, laidback ED. It’s called Yume? (yes, with the “?”) and it’s by Hatena, hence Leo’s shirt saying “Hatena”.

Welp, I don’t think anything supernatural will happen anymore, but…it’s still a fun anime. They toned down BB too, which should please a huge number of reviewers who found him obnoxious.

Yashahime 3

Hitokon? Short for “hito control” (hito = person)? Update: It seems the name was also kanji for “flying head root”.

“…puts one to sleep.”

“…from a place like that?”

Can a Dream Butterfly steal memories?

Moriarty 2

“Colum” (sic).

These CGI horses are gonna bug me, aren’t they…?

There is this sentiment that people need to be “saved” from poverty, especially when it comes down to African and Asian people living in slums (these days). I get the same feeling from this.

Maou-jou 3

Free advertising for Maou-jou’s home magazine! LOL!

I was wondering why those things were called “Show the Mary”…remember Mezo Shouji from Boku no Hero Academia? Same pun (the walls have ears and the doors have eyes, or something of the sort).

LOL, instead of yokudekimashita (literally, “you did good”) it’s makura ni narimashita (“you made [the book] into a pillow”). The common sentence ending for verbs means it’s funnier in Japanese, I think.

…argh! I can’t read all of Alazif’s info because of the hardsubs! Umm…”Current worry: Princess” and “Worry of the past hundred years: Destroying the demon clan” is in the box next to the logo. “Powerful magic techniques are recorded inside this book, so the demons feared it and sealed it away as a ‘forbidden grimoire’.”/”Currently, under the control of the princess, they’ve been bestowing magic and magic techniques to her, so they haven’t been used for the purpose they were made for and they’re wishing the princess would use them for not-so-stupid things” (I don’t know what pronoun to give Alazif, so I gave them 3rd person “them)…ah, someone translated the stuff for me! (That saves me a lot of time.) So Alazif is a “he”, huh?

OHKO to Demon Cleric, LOL.

SAN…? Oh, “sanity”?

Oh, Demon Cleric’s ears are black goat ears. No wonder you can’t see ‘em.

This sword is like Ex from Princess, ‘Tis Time for Torture!

HypMic 4

From here until episode 6-ish, I’ll be paying extra attention to characters’ role language. I normally do that, but I picked this anime for an assignment because I knew it had a lot of examples…yes, you heard me right. An assignment! I should be happy, but I’m wondering if my taste is going to get roasted by the normies or if I’ve gone too far with my unabashed love…

I was discussing with some of my peeps in a Discord server and…is it possible MTR will get an ED from here on out if you divide the episodes up for an almost equal amount for each division? We’ll have to wait and see.

…Oof. I’m sort of scared for this episode. It’s gonna have swearing galore…and yup, there it is, right out the gate.

Wait, why not translate wakagashira? It just means “young head” or “2nd in command”.

…well, at least they got some variation in their swearing this time…?

Hmm, normally the translation is “rabbit cop” or something toned down like that. They dialled it up to “rabbity-ass cop”. (Yakuwarigo: Samatoki = na, on the whole = very, very slang – as a former naval officer, you would expect Riou to speak formally, but he speaks as casually as almost everyone else (yamero etc.))

I’ve never seen anyone refer to Samatoki as “Kashira”. *laser stares Rentei for guest VA roles*

(Yakuwarigo: Samatoki (?) = zo)

“…why don’t you ask the cops to deal with it?” – Uh, Samatoki? Jyuto is the cop. (Well, a cop.)

I still have no idea why they subtitle the laughing…

Wait, if there’s a casino…is Dice there?!

…yup, right on cue. I didn’t think Tom and co. would be there too.

Oh, LOL. HypMic is a tourist trap anime = see those buns Tom’s eating? They’re chuukaman (Chinese buns). Makes sense in Chinatown.

It took me several watches to realise who’d passed by, but it’s…MTC in formal clothes?! (You can see part of Jyuto’s face, just to confirm it.)

Why are they wearing glasses? Even Jyuto’s wearing different glasses to the usual, LOL.

I learnt how to do some of the casino stuff while trying to get a job as a gaming customer service assistant in a huge casino joint one time. In a sense, this brings me back to then. (Update: I mean, the sound of the roulette, the sight of the board, the chips and the like. That’s what takes me back.)

(Yakuwarigo: Dice slurs his words a lot, especially when yelling things along the lines of “Please lend me moneyyyyyyyyyyyyy!” This is also true in the game.)

Dice seems to have jumped straight to “Riou”, rather than “Riou-san”.  

I wonder if anyone will ever elaborate on that incident where Dice and Riou met?

(Yakuwarigo: Samatoki speaks coarsely, but not outright swearing in the source language…for an example, he says kussotare when roped into being Jakurai’s “female counterpart” for the ARB Halloween event, but he doesn’t do anything of the sort here.)

Even Ramuda uses “san” with Samatoki, most likely to emulate how Samatoki calls himself “oresama” (but with lower formality).

Ramuda-chin? That’s new.

Yakuwarigo: Gentaro spoke normally, just with desu/masu. Maybe the “perchance” was to make it blend in with his -de aru?

Uh-oh…Ramuda’s favours always are things like “dress up for me” and “hang out with me”, if the game is any indication. (One of them happens to be how Ichiro was roped into being a sorta-Kirito for the ARB Halloween event.)

This CGI…it’s not the jankiest, but it is gonna bug me ever so slightly.

I’ve noticed a lot of people in the English-speaking fandom, when they watched the anime, took a shine to MTC (because they seem to embody the entire “refuge in audacity” thing they’ve picked up on…plus that one hamster lyric people got attached to). You can see them being all “cop/gangster husbands” here if that’s your gig – it’s kind of my gig, but to be real HypMic is not a scene where I ship dudes. I’m sorry, but I just like watching pretty boys kick butt.

What warranted the dramatic glasses drop…? (LOL anyway)

That whistle…LOL. It’s like “Look at my boy fight” and “Riou’s got some sweet fightin’ moves” rolled up in one.

For some reason, when I saw the sign for the Organised Crime department, I heard the Student Council theme from Boueibu play in my head…? (Remember that harpsichord theme?) *shrugs* I dunno why that happened.

Hmm…they crossed out the subtitles using Swedish letters instead of strikethrough, huh? Didn’t know that was a limitation.

(Yakuwarigo: Jyuto = dazo)

“Wouldya look at that forlorn mug of his?” – Seeing a man taller than you (Riou is a good 190 or so cm, mind you, making him the tallest member of his division above Samatoki’s 180-something and Jyuto’s 170-something) making a sort of demented puppy-dog face…LOL.

(Yakuwarigo: Jyuto elevated himself to kimasuyo…maybe to win back Riou’s favour?)

(Yakuwarigo: The translation elevated Samatoki’s “nanda” to “the f***”. “Nanda” is not that bad – it’s casual, but doesn’t imply swearing like “ittai” is supposed to mean “the hell”.)

(Yakuwarigo: Jyuto doesn’t finish when he says “ore wa hanashi ga”. That’s called an omission, plain as that may be.)

(Yakuwarigo: Taihendaze!...Maybe that’s a bit far to call it “we’re f**ked”…? It could just be “we’re doomed!” or “we’ve got trouble!”)

(Yakuwarigo: Jyuto uses desune. He’s the most feminine of the trio by virtue of being the smallest height-wise and most polite due to his job, but he seems to bounce between casual and polite a lot.)

…wow, even the rap lyrics have the F bomb…and this time, you can see the evidence.

Natsu no mushi = bugs in the summer. Not a perfect match, but it works. (Notably, things like Gentaro’s speech and rap lyrics don’t play by the same yakuwarigo rules because you can play characters within it – e.g. the evil doctor Jakurai sometimes plays. I’ve noticed most of the songs use casual or whatever rhymes, even for someone like Doppo who’s considered more polite than most.)

…Despite the swearing…that song slaps, man! That’s great.

MTC seems to have more tragedy on average than other divisions. This is because FP and BB are quite light-hearted and mostly family-friendly with hidden depths, but MTR mostly has stalker stories. Update: That’s when they’re focussing on MTR solo. FP’s currently could get pretty dark soon and a lot of the dark/tragic stuff is not actually going to make the anime because it’s in the drama tracks/manga.

My gosh, we got to see Nemu animated!

Okay, I’m not well-versed in yakuza slang but kumicho = boss, so Samatoki would have to answer to a kumicho.

(Yakuwarigo: Notably, when Riou bows, he doesn’t elevate his speech.)

(Yakuwarigo: Jyuto = desukane)

…and randomly, rock solo postcard memory away from the sunset. (LOL) (Also, I believe I befriended Zainou during my time on WordPress. This episode title really does mean things, in a certain sense.)

Ah, it did switch! It’s just…uh, gone to an MTC version of itself (and it has the same name, “Kizuna”). So that means we wait another 6 episodes for MTR. On the other hand…what will the final version be? A whole cast version? A different song? No song at all? *shrugs* Only the future can tell us these things. (Also, why is Jyuto so loud…? That’s why I’m not a bigger fan of him. Much like Ramuda’s minna genki?, his iconic quotes like “In the building!” are so loud and silly-sounding, you just can’t get them out of your head.)

The cityscape in the middle of the disc at the ED’s start seems to have changed. I would assume that’s a Yokohama skyline.

Keiichi Nakagawa is the voice of Rentei…I should stop burning myself on guest VA appearances, this guy’s a rookie. This Nouzenkazura VA (Kenji Hamada) though is voiced by the guy who does Otegine in Touken Ranbu and isn’t as much of a rookie as Rentei’s.

Notably, where BB do the “BB sign” (as it seems to be known), MTC do a finger gun. MTR have the wolf fang, but…what is FP’s, then? Update: It’s a peace sign to the side to make an F.

Today’s new music was “Red Zone (Don’t Test da Master)”, by KLOOZ and DJ WATARAI.

*cringes at the airhorn* *briefly presses fingers to forehead, as if going to massage temples, but then removes them* The airhorn reminds me of crazy sport fans. Crazy anime fans are more civil than them, which is one reason why I don’t follow sports on the regular.

Update: Oh! The pond owl cafe in episode 2! It means Ikebukuro!...Sort of. Fukurou rhymes with ‘bukuro and ike = pond.

Akudama 3

Hmm? Is it just me or is that T in the code the kanji for “bird” (tori)?

“It’s where I belong.” – I know my reason for pursuing Japanese is a purely selfish reason – so I can stay above others in the topics I think matter to me and pursue the endless natural high that comes from the thrill of translation (which may be all one reason or two, depending on how you look at it).

Oh, the bunny and shark again.

The bunny’s shirt said “life” at one point, I didn’t understand the shark’s though.

At one point, shark: Ka (from “Kansai”), bunny: ken (authority).

At the end, shark: heaven, bunny: hell. These broadcasts look like NHK broadcasts at the end.

Most of these words are katakana, making them look foreign.

Kansai 300, 25-1.

“Move-you-s**t!” – It…seems a bit out of character for Swindler to say the swear word there.

Taiso 3

That CGI…is not the greatest.

According to Moon Land, gymnastics operates on a deduction/addition system. You add points for difficulty, but deduct points for errors like how Minamino’s feet are apart.

*sees montage* - Those CGI scenes really take out the budget, huh…?

Gymnastics moves are named after their creators…kinda like scientific names and finders.

There was a lot of commentary in Moon Land so I’m not sure what the moves are called from memory (the dialogue always did that for me), but having the reactions speak for themselves…I think the anime team has enough faith the reactions will convey everything. They did, by the way.

You can see the bone at the base of Minamino’s neck, under the skin…it’s sort of scary.

The fact you couldn’t see Jotaro’s eyes for a shot or two…that kind of unnerved me and built tension.

Oh! The men in black appear after the credits!

[thesealfriend]

*puts on Serious Game Dev Hat"

This one might get really rambly so it's going under a read more. Main topics are Games, Crunch and University.

(For folk seeing this who are curious but completely divorced from the games world, because even though it's in the news a lot lately it's hardly the universal topic people think it is, Crunch is the term for when creative studios, in this particular case games studios, overwork their employees by "incentivising" them to work longer hours or produce more content for little to no compensation, usually towards the end of a development cycle when deadlines are looming. I put "incentivising" in quotes because a lot of companies say they don't force workers to crunch, it's voluntary and workers are just so passionate! But actually, taking a stand and enforcing boundaries can often come with consequences within the workplace - workers who stand up to crunch might be first for layoffs or receive bad references from employers when trying to move jobs. It's hardly as "voluntary" as they make it seem.)

Anyway, rambling already! Let's begin...

So I studied game design at uni. This is no surprise to those who know me or note my "game dev hat" tag. I don't work in the industry right now for Reasons™ but I plan to one day.

My across my degree, grades were based on about 70% coursework, 30% exams/class tests. Funnily enough, the best way to learn games is to make games. So out of that coursework, I'd say the fair majority was, if not "make a game", then at least "produce a design document"/"prototype a game"/"create a level". There was a decent amount of essay-based coursework, writing about the psychology of games or theory of play etc, as well as reports on projects, but I'd say at least half of my grade came down to some aspect of actually creating games.

And that was a lot. It's understandable for the kind of course it is, but we often found ourselves working on 2-3 games or levels in 12 weeks. Which, when you vaguely run the numbers and compare the expected output to the time, was about doable. We weren't making AAA masterpieces of course, we were working in groups of 2-4 usually to make a vertical slice prototype (all functionality of a game across a small segment of the content) or a level or two to fit a brief. But!

We were expected to put in 40 hours a week for uni, as though it were a full time job. That explicit expectation means I can try and step around trying to calculate hours in the day and subtract for travel, leisure, eating etc. I'm using the numbers we were given. So that's 40hrs total, over 12 weeks, but that's including all the time we spend

Depending on the semester we had about 12-16hrs of teaching time, sometimes plus up to 4 hours unsupervised lab time to work on class exercises, so let's call that 16 hours overall in uni. That leaves 24 hours per week, to work on usually 3 classes at a time. That's 8 hours, per class, per week. Multiply that by 12 and you get 96 hours. 96 hours in which to complete each class, assuming we spend the exact amount of time we're meant to on uni work.

Now that sounds fine, right? That's two whole Global Game Jams* for each class, and that's not including time one would spend at a jam eating, sleeping or resting. People make pretty impressive stuff at jams, so why not be able to do that over the course of 2 jams comfortably?

(*for the uninitiated, GGJ is an annual event where game developers (including designers, programmers, artists and musicians etc) cram into a room for 48hrs straight, get given a surprise theme and make a game out of it. It's entirely for fun and I love them. Also some jam sites give you free pizza.)

Well, the thing is, I've led you all down a bit of a rabbit hole going purely by the numbers. I've not gotten into the nature of some of the work, and the overall system, which makes a difference. See, unis want to teach us good time management, and they want to actually steer us away from crunch. I've been verbally told many times that Crunch Is Bad And We Shouldn't Let It Happen. So they build in systems like interim reports, and enforced team meetings with minutes taken and then rating your team members' performance, appointments with tutors throughout the year for bigger stuff. These are all meant to ensure that you're working on projects at the "right rate" and keeping up with deadlines. And honestly? For some of the less game-specific coursework (psychology projects, essays on theory of design etc) this works fairly well. Universities have been structuring courses the same way for decades, why change it now?

But the thing is, game development is game development whether you're in the "controlled environment" of a university or the Real World™ of the games industry. Quite frankly put, shit happens. And this goes for all university courses, not just games. You get the usual tech issues ("my computer broke and I'm having to do this work at the library/elsewhere on campus", "my internet is down and I can't collaborate with my group" etc etc) as well as the personal life interruptions, both of which are highly tied to class and that's a whole other essay ramble. You also just get that one person who assigns themself task XYZ then never does it, which you could have managed to do yourself if you'd known they weren't going to do anything, but they assured you they would! These are the things we're warned about, told to give extra time to account for, and if it's really bad most unis have some kind of "oh shit something outside my control happened" form you can fill in for extra consideration, as well as individual tutors offering extensions.

But on top of that you also get the games-specific issues.

You get that one animation that, no matter how much skill and effort you put in, you're not happy with. You get that weird code that won't compile, and nobody on StackOverflow can recreate. You get the creative block. My god, the creative block. And then, you get the last minute changes to the brief or structure, or if you're unlucky enough to be working for a real world client, you get *weekly* changes to the brief or structure. You get the fact that the software you've been given doesn't fit what you've been told to do. You get the natural period of downtime because you've worked on your character model, and you're waiting for another group member to finish an animation and there's bugger all you can do in the lull. Most of these are just, things that happen, and we're expected to work around them because they happen in the real world too.

But in the Real World™, whenever "shit happens", that's when a studio, if it's a good one, can work around the issues. They hire the right people, and the right number of people for each role, knowing the kind of work that's expected, rather than just going "ok we have more programmers than artists this year so the teams will reflect that, good luck". They vet the software to ensure it meets the needs of the employees and their tasks. They have producers to keep on top of the brief, and liase with clients to make sure everyone knows what they're going to be doing ahead of time and throughout. And on top of all that, they remove the time pressure. They set goals, that "we'd like to have XYZ done in 6 weeks, and a beta released in the coming months" but they don't expect the workers to perform miracles.

But universities can't, or won't, do that. At the end of it all, the end of the semester is approaching and you've been putting your best work in all term, but there's 2 weeks to go and so much left to do if you want to submit something you're happy to be graded on. You could ask for an extension, but if everyone who was in that situation did so there just wouldn't be deadlines. You could just push ahead at normal pace, and submit what you have and hope for the best, but then you're risking failing the class and having it all be for nothing. And some people will do either of these things + they'll sacrifice a grade and do a resit in order to give themselves more time to finish another concurrent project, or they'll glean a few days' extension for a very specific issue, but for a lot of folk, you do what feels natural when deadlines loom and you're behind. You crunch.

And much like industry, uni society encourages crunch implicitly, even though it explicitly shames it. The tutor tells you, "last year's students managed this project in the same length of time!" but they don't mention how all of them probably crunched too. They blame your time management, not realising that if 75% of the class are having to work around this then the issue probably isn't with individuals' time management. The students talk among themselves about who got the least sleep over the last two weeks of term, and it's a badge of honour (again, not necessarily game dev-specific, but there's definitely an enhanced culture of it there) and who put in 8hr shifts after uni to crush the bugs.

And we're taught about passion. One of my tutors, who is the most Explicitly Anti-Crunch man I know, was also the first one who told me that "If you aren't working on other stuff in your personal time you can't expect to get a job easily". He didn't say it in a positive way, but he knew it was the case and didn't encourage us to fight it. And sure, if game dev is something you enjoy as a hobby that will stand you in good stead. But if every student or young dev is told they have to go "above and beyond" to succeed, then that shifts the bar for what "above and beyond" means. Exactly the same as companies "incentivising" 60 hour weeks, so that everyone works 60 hours to prove they're passionate, and then 80 hours is above and beyond.

And you know the worst part about all this? From a purely productive standpoint, it works. For every class I got a good grade in, I'd crunched. And sure, I'd have probably just about passed most of them if I hadn't, but crunch in my case (and other folk I've spoken to) isn't the difference between an A and a B in games courses, it's the difference between an A and a D. Because sure, I'd submit 80% of the work, but without that final 20% tying it together that 80% of the work might make up 40-50% of the grade requirements. It's a very all-or-nothing discipline, except you can't physically do "all" because if you satisfy all the grade requirements, you get 80-90% because "there's always something more you could add to make it better". Which is also a whole other rant.

Anyway, my point with all of this is that, despite how it seems, studying game design at uni sets prospective employees up for crunch. The magnitude is lower, but the attitude is there. They know that they've done it before, that if they can just pull through a couple of weeks doing double time, they'll get it out the way. And so far, that has worked for them, because deadlines rarely do move. But in industry, they work their two weeks double time only for the worst of the studios to say "actually we see you working hard but also we're not gonna make it, you've got another month". And then they have to pull that time for another month. And maybe again after that. As a student, that kind of extension happened to me once - my 3D coursework was meant to be due before the Christmas break, and with 2 weeks to go, the lecturer announced we had til the start of the exam period (mid-January). But because we had that extra time, he expected the quality to reflect it. We weren't getting extra time so we could do the same amount of work without crunching - we were getting it so we could do more work. Again, the exact same pattern we see in industry right now.

So what's the solution? Honestly, I don't have one. Reviewing workload for students in creative subjects is a sticking plaster, and removing time pressure from coursework would require an overhaul of the system that I can't see coming any time soon. Acknowledgement of the problem is the best we can do for now. If you or someone you know is in or studying for an industry prone to this kind of behaviour, talk about it. Push the idea that the institution is flawed, and that whatever kind of unhealthy habits people pick up while studying don't have to become their life.

Look after each other. Peace out!

[chimerri]

So... I’ve been entertaining a Scum Villain x The Count of Monte Cristo AU idea. Because it works really well. LBH as Edmund Dantes (the count), SQQ as Fernand, and SY as a millennial who got transmigrated as SQQ and now has to try and remember the details of the required class reading he was assigned forever ago. Feel free to click the read more if you’re interested in hearing me babble about this AU!

If I were to vaguely assign roles based on the novel, it would be as such: LBH- Edmund Dantes, SQQ- Fernand, NYY- Mercedes, MBJ- Luigi Vampa and Jacapo mix??, SHL or QHT- Haydee??, LMY- Valentine or Eugenie. 

If you’re unfamiliar with the premise of The Count of Monte Cristo, it’s basically the OG epic underdog revenge story about a trusting good man who is betrayed and used as a scapegoat by scumbag officials for their own benefit. He spends years in prison, and befriends a prisoner who educates him and teaches him combat. With the old man’s help, he manages to escape, befriend a band of sea merchants, and find the treasure hidden in the island of Monte Cristo. He returns to see all the officials now successful, and one of them married to his former fiance. Thus begins his plan revenge by taking on a new identity as the rich, mysterious “Count of Monte Cristo” and enacting the slow elaborate downfall of his enemies.  Anyway so SY transmigrates as the scumbag character and he's like “well shit, I'm gonna die if I betray this good pupper LBH and steal his fiance NYY, so you know what??? I'm not gonna do that.”

He can't, however, avoid the plot point that LBH needs to be wrongly accused sent prison for (X) number of years... So while he didn't do the scumbag thing of telling NYY that LBH was dead and taking her as a wife during her time of grief, he is still like “Welp I'm gonna die cause I'm the one who turned him in and boy is he gonna be pissed when he gets back. Time to prepare my funds to leave the country.”

But LBH comes back earlier than expected. Everyone is like.. omg who is this new mysterious, rich, and hot count?? 

 And SQQ is yellin internally because LBH LOOKS ALMOST EXACTLY SAME, JUST A LIL OLDER... HOW CAN YOU NOT KNOW IT'S HIM??? DO YOU ALL HAVE 2 BRAIN CELLS COMBINED?? IS THIS A SUPERMAN/CLARK KENT THING?!

LBH gets his revenge on all the other scumbags and SQQ is just waiting his turn because his character was the worst. LBH is treating him too kindly... maybe LBH hasn't figured out that SQQ knows his identity?? The original goods didn't figure it out, after all, until it was too late.

The original good's downfalls were jealousy and greed. SQQ knows better, and keeps money hidden while investing the rest on LBH's recommendations (knowing that they will fail, bc he's actually controlling them). He plans to fake his death and bolt it after the stocks crash

But what he doesn't know is that LBH has been planning to buy him out after those investments fell by offering an engagement. Make him his fiance and watch as the traitors fall into ruin blinded by their own greed and corruption.

This is as far as I’ve gotten... but if you’re interested in The Count of Monte Cristo, I really recommend the 2002 movie version! It changes the plot and ending a little bit (the book is HUGE of course they needed to change it) but I enjoyed it a lot! There’s also an anime adaptation called Gankutsuou which actually surprisingly is a lot more loyal to the book in terms of plot (which is... surprising since Dantes is part demon in that version) I really can’t imagine SQH as Alexandre Dumas... So I think it would be a pretty funny twist if all along, it was the world of a fanfic written by SQH based on the novel by Dumas LOL.

[purplesurveys]

988

survey by ashleybayle

Has anyone ever told you that you looked like a celebrity? Yeah. The most popular opinion I get is Anna Akana and a local singer named Kakie, and then more occasionally I’ve also gotten Lucy Hale. Of course, all of these people are absolutely gorgeous though so it’s hard to accept comments like these lol

When was the last time you got something done to your hair? Professionally, late February. But I trimmed my bangs last Saturday.

Do you have any change on you right now? Barely. I only have a few 1-peso coins and a couple of 25-cent coins left.

What color is the pillowcase(s) on your bed? They’re pink with white lines.

Do you have a favorite day of the week? I like Monday mornings because we have weekly video calls for work and it’s really the only time I get to talk to other people anymore. Even if I can’t really count any of my colleagues as my friends, I’m able to get the human connection I’ve been hungry for and it always leaves me feeling good for the rest of the day.

Cutting your hair extremely short, would you do it? Yeah. That’s what I did last February; I’d do it again once my hair gets too long. I’ll probably go even shorter the next time because depression.

Have you ever been in an art show? I’ve been to art exhibits, if you’re referring to the same thing.

Would you considered yourself to be well-exposed to life or sheltered? I was sheltered for most of my life but I’ve been trying to get exposed to more scary life things so that I slowly start to detach from people I used to normally depend on, like my parents.

How high is your pain tolerance? Not high at all. I bruise like a peach and have near-meltdowns over sharp objects especially if I get pricked by one.

Have you ever played the game Halo? I don’t think so. I could have watched others play it in the past, but I’ve never played the game myself.

Are you wearing any jewelry at the moment? No I’m not.

Is there a sport that you love to play? Table tennis! Futsal was also fun the one or two times I played it, and it was in playing that sport that I learned I apparently make a good goalkeeper. In an alternate universe I probably play football, ha.

Has anything made you sad in the past 48 hours? Yes. That’s a constant state of mind now.

Have you ever had to learn lines for a play/skit/movie? Yes. We were required to do so many skits in high school so making scripts and memorizing lines was part of a normal day.

Do you like your nose? I’ve never complained about it. I don’t normally think about my nose either.

Is there a hair color you prefer on the opposite sex? No.

Kissing someone with facial hair, do you mind? I’ve never tried it, so I don’t have a solid opinion.

Would you ever like to be a stunt person? Sounds fun but I’m barely physically fit for such a role and I’d break a bone almost immediately. Even professional stunt people get injured, so...

Are you a pyromaniac? The furthest thing from it. I’m terrified of fire.

How soon is your birthday? Six months and a day.

Are you one of those people who listen to songs on repeat? Isn’t everyone prone to doing that once in a while? But yeah, I guess I’m ‘one of those’ people.

Can any of your friends sing very well? Lots of em. Hannah, Tina, Ed, Andi, Michelle, Nacho, etc.

Would you ever enter any kind of pageant? That does not sound interesting to me.

Do you have piano fingers? No :(

What is your preferred curse word? Fuck.

When someone's drunk, the truth comes spilling out, correct? I guess, for some people. Other people express their drunkenness in other ways. But I for sure lose my filter once I’m drunk; it’s a lot easier to ask me questions once I’ve had a few glasses, ha.

Have you ever shouted something random at someone out a car window? I’m sure I’ve rolled down my windows to cuss out a stupid driver once or twice.

Have you ever slept on a beach? No. I know my mom does, but I personally find it risky/dangerous. When it comes to open spaces like the beach, I find it hard to trust people to not be thieves.

Would you like to be taller? It’s not an active wish of mine. It’d always be cool to be taller, but I’m also okay with my current height.

Are you a fan of piercings on the opposite sex? Not necessarily. I wouldn’t say I’m attracted to them.

Have you ever listened to Celtic music? Nope.

Do you enjoy making up words? I’ve never done that, no.

Have you ever been attacked by an animal? Aside from the time a giant bird kind of charged at me at a safari and getting playbites from Cooper, no. Cats hiss at me all the time, but I get out of their vicinity before they can attack me or whatever.

Who did you dance with last? Rita, Blanch, Mik, Laurice, Jum, a bunch of strangers.

When holding hands, do you intertwine fingers? Yeah. That’s my favorite.

Is there a movie that makes you cry every single time you watch it? This is gonna get some eyerolls but...Titanic. Forever one of my faves no matter how overrated people find it, hahaha. The “Rose Dawson” scene gets me all the time.

Do you ever talk to the TV? I mean if I have comments about the show I’m watching, yeah I guess I’m technically talking to the TV. But I don’t talk to the TV like a camera, if that’s what you mean.

What's your opinion on Johnny Depp? I feel for him and all the shit he’s gone through with Amber Heard. I’ll always feel bad for having sided with Amber in the past. Movie-wise, not really a fan of his repertoire but I respect his craft and abilities nonetheless.

Have you ever watched the Tudors? Nah but I hear of it a lot, so I’ve always been interested.

Can you speak in different accents? No. My dad’s super good at accents though since he travels a lot for his job. He can do American, Indian, Singaporean, Chinese, Australian, etc.

Who was the last person you mocked/mimicked? The annoying person at the BIR who wasted my time. 

If you write, isn't writer's block the most horrible thing? I’d say it’s inconvenient, but it’s not the worst of my worries whenever it strikes.

Can you sew or knit? No but I’ve made up my mind about learning how to :) I put some cross-stitch kits on my online shopping cart recently and I can’t wait to get my hands busy.

Do you have a favorite pair of jeans? Yesssss. They’re the only pair of jeans I wear these days, on the rare times I have a reason to go out.

What size shirt do you normally wear? XS.

Are you good with money? I’m good with saving if I absolutely have to, but I’m equally good at spending all my money in one go lol

Has anyone ever aimed a gun at you? No. Don’t know how well I’d fare in that; I tend to freeze up and forget words when I’m terrified.

What is the first letter of the person's name you last kissed? G.

Do you use myspace for following celebrities, and facebook for friends? I never regularly used Myspace, and Facebook is for sharing memes, staying updated on the news, and connecting with family and friends. At least up until I deactivated last month.

Have you ever written a song? Maybe in grade school when it was an assignment for class, but never on my own time.

Do you believe there is life on other planets? Other planets in other galaxies perhaps in other universes, sure.

If you think about the universe long enough, it's baffling isn't it? Doesn’t take long for me, but yes it is.

When was the last time you fell? I haven’t in a while.

Are you a fan of Christian Bale? I wouldn’t say so. I don’t think I’ve seen any of his movies. I’ve been meaning to watch American Psycho for years but just never got around to it.

Do you have any sort of debt? No.

Is there an accent you prefer? I don’t know if prefer is the right word since I don’t have any favorite accents, but hmmm I can listen to Florence Pugh’s accent all day.

Have you spoken to the person you love today? Yep.

Would you ever travel to Los Angeles? If given the chance sure, but I honestly prefer other cities.

Have you ever been through a natural disaster? A lot of them.

Is there a specific time period that interests you? I don’t think I’ve ever been hooked to just one specific era...I’m interested in all of them and read about them an equal amount.

Do any of your friends own an expensive car? JM used to drive a Lexus to school on Fridays.

Have you ever been on a train? Just once. I had to go to Manila for a journalism class but I wasn’t willing to drive all the way there, so I took a train and had Jum keep me company because I didn’t know how commuting worked.

Is there a memory that embarasses you to think about? I mean yeah, there are a lot.

Have you ever used different colored paper clips? Possibly.

Where exactly are you right now? In a corner in my room.

Don't you admire those people who know exactly what they want to do? I admire anyone who’s able to make the best of what they’ve got, no matter what their progress is in life. Life shouldn’t be a contest of who gets their shit figured out the earliest or the best way possible.

Is there a guy you can talk to about anything? No.

Have you ever been in a parade? I know I said in a previous survey that I haven’t been to a parade, but now that I think about it I’ve been to several Pride Marches, which kinda count as parades...so yeah, I have been.

Would you ever consider being a news reporter? My entire family wanted me to end up being one, but it was never an interest of mine. I was just too shy to tell them that that’s not really my goal. I like staying behind the camera for the most part.

Are you, or anyone you know, an atheist? Yes and yes, I know several people who are.

Has anyone ever told you to "get a grip"? I don’t think I’ve ever gotten those exact words before.

Do people say you look your age? Or younger or older? Younger.

Have you ever sent a celebrity fan mail? Kind of. Five years ago my friend Heather and I were at YouTube Fanfest where Joe Sugg, Caspar Lee, and Oli White were part of the line-up, and we didn’t anticipate that so many fans would come with gifts even though there was no guarantee of meeting them. We came up with a little gift of our own, which was really nothing more than a tiny post-it saying that we love them lmao (we went to the venue straight after school, hence Heather having school supplies HAHA). It was such a poor-looking gift. We went to their assistant who was SUPER nice about it and didn’t make us feel like shit for our gift which was pretty much worthless and could easily get lost – it was literally a piece of post-it. I doubt it ever got to them, but we gave it a shot anyway.

Are you ashamed of how you acted when you were younger? Some parts of it, definitely. I grew up in a violent household, so I was violent towards my brother when he was a baby, not knowing how serious my actions were. I was also a pain in the ass while I was going through puberty.

Do you ever have those days where you feel you're the ugliest person ever? Yes.

Beauty is both external and internal, correct? Sure.

Have you ever been in a musical? Yeah, in grade school through high school. Never had a solo role, though.

When was the last time you swam in a pool? July 2019.

Is there a friend's family that makes you feel like you're family too? Angela’s. At one point, Katreen’s too, before we grew apart.

How do you know someone is your best friend? When I don’t feel like filtering my words around them, and when I allow myself to be fully vulnerable with them.

When was the last time you used a highlighter? Sometime in February I’m guessing. Before the lockdown and when I still went to school and had readings.

Has a flashlight ever ran out batteries on you in the dark? I don’t think so.