#what do you MEAN my brain is turning on me. what do you MEAN everything has to be bad and horrible suddenly.

[aperrywilliams]

More Than You Say (Spencer Reid x Fem!BAU!Reader)

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Author Masterlist | Part 1: More Than You Know

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Pairing: Spencer Reid x Fem!BAU!Reader.

Summary: Spencer mulls over what you said and your love confession during your last fight. And he knows how deeply he fucked up this time. After admitting he is in love with you, Spencer wants to fix things. Are you willing to let him?

Word Count: 5.6k

TW: ANGST. Strong language. Mention of abduction, drug use, getting shot, death of relatives and loved ones, jail, and unsafe sex. If I forgot anything, let me know.

A/N: This is the aftermath of 'More Than You Know' from Spencer's POV. I'm not going to lie. This one ends worse than the previous one. The good news is that there is a third chance, meaning a third part. Maybe they will have luck in that one.

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Spencer doesn't know how long he has stood there, looking at the door you shut when you left. His first thought was to run after you, but he refrained.

What could he have said to you?

Sitting in the chair that you left vacant, he takes a deep breath. The room feels suffocating to him.

Your words keep reverberating in his brain, and Spencer wants to feel utterly surprised, but it would be a lie. Not that he precisely knew what was going on; it was more like he sensed something was off, and he ignored it.

Like a royal asshole.

The hurt in your eyes is something he knows he will never forget. Those kind eyes that were always welcoming and understanding, this time, only reflected betrayal and pain.

Spencer hates his mouth and the way his words can do so much harm.

Rewinding the past months in his brain, Spencer tries to figure out how you both ended like this.

You never told him how you felt, and Spencer is sure about it. He would have done something if you did.

He is so caught up in his thoughts that he doesn't notice Emily walking into the room.

"She told you, didn't she? You must have hella pissed her off," Emily muses. And Spencer can't help but return a confused look.

"Wait. You knew?"

Emily let out a frustrated sigh, sitting in front of Spencer.

"Sometimes I wonder why that amount of IQ doesn't pay off," she wonders. Seeing the man still clueless, she continues talking. "Spencer, possibly the only one who didn't know at this point was you."

Great. Everyone knew but him. Spencer wants to dig a hole and disappear right now.

"Why she didn't tell me?"

The question is more to himself than Emily. She answers nonetheless.

"I'm not sure if she ever wanted you to know. If you hadn't pushed her the way you did, she would never have told you, I guess."

Spencer takes in Emily's words and starts questioning everything about you and him in the past months.

"I assumed so many things lately, and now I'm unsure if they are true or part of my imagination," he says, frustrated, raking his hands through his hair.

"You have the answers, Spencer. Even if you think you don't."

Spencer scoffs at that. He doesn't fucking know anything. That's the problem. He needs to fix something but doesn't know what it is.

"I need to talk to her," he decides, standing and walking to the door. Before he could cross the threshold, Emily calls his name.

"Reid, wait."

Spencer turns to see Emily. She has a stern look.

"Don't talk to her unless you know what you want to say."

Spencer's eyes narrow. He can't conceive of not talking to you right now. He wants to run to your place right away.

"What? But Emily, I need to know-"

Spencer argues, but Emily doesn't let him finish.

"You'll figure it out. Just don't rush it. She has been through a lot. At least you owe her that. Think about what she told you first."

Spencer doesn't know what to do—the compulsion to run after you clouds his senses, but Emily has a point. He doesn't know what to say. Yeah, he is sorry for what he said to you and how he treated you, but an 'I'm sorry' won't fix it.

Besides, until that day, Spencer thought you both were only friends, and you were okay with it. He only pegged all your apprehensions and the words of concern like a friend's worry.

It seems he did a great job ignoring what it was in front of his eyes.

You said you loved him. And Spencer has no reason to doubt your words, even if he told you he does.

Spencer leaves the conference room defeated and with a weight over his shoulders he hasn't felt in a long time.

As he passes your desk, he sees it empty, and his stomach clenches. It's like being in a parallel world where you are not next to him, and just imagining it disturbs him.

The rest of the team watches as Spencer wanders around the BAU like a lost puppy, wondering if this will make him really reflect on how he's been leading his life lately. They know the bond between you and Spencer is important to both of you, but they've also seen how it has deteriorated over time.

That night, as he steps into his apartment after work, he only wants to grab the phone and call you. But Emily's words start replaying again.

'You'll figure it out. At least you owe her that.'

Spencer opts to sit on the couch with the lights off and his head back.

He needs to fix this.

When he closes his eyes, his mind wanders to the day he met you.

-

He was a scared kid, a freshman FBI agent recruited by Jason Gideon. He put a foot in the bullpen that day, and Hotch was the first to greet him. His stern look was different from Gideon's and more intimidating for sure. He led Spencer to the conference room, where you were perched in a corner with a mug of coffee in your hands.

'This is SSA (Y/N) (Y/L/N). It's her first day, too. Agent (Y/L/N), he is SSA Dr. Spencer Reid; he is joining the team as well.'

You glanced at him and rapidly stood from your spot, stretching your hand to him. He should have shaken it, but his germaphobe self kicked off.

'The number of pathogens passed during a handshake is staggering. It's actually safer to kiss.'

After the words left his mouth, he wanted to be buried alive. You retracted your hand with an amused smile.

'I didn't know. But I guess we should skip the kiss part for now,' you said, and Spencer's cheeks burned in embarrassment. Seeing him all flustered, you quickly added. 'But It's good to know new things. I think I'll learn a lot from you, Dr. Reid.'

This time, Spencer's cheeks burned from more than embarrassment.

It might sound cliché to say that for the first time in his life, Spencer felt so comfortable with someone. You quickly became his best friend and unmatched support. People wondered why. To outsider's eyes, you both looked so different. You were more confident than him, with an extraordinary ability to listen and say the right words at the right time. You were one of the few people who wasn't intimidated by either Hotch or Gideon, a thing he could not say about himself.

And, by far, you have been the only person there for him when Spencer has needed it the most.

He remembers having the vial in his hand. He stared at the item for a while, deciding whether to use it. It has been weeks since Hankel kidnapped him, and he stole the Dilaudid from his dead body.

He was feeling trapped and hopeless. Spencer thought he could handle it, but every day, it seemed worse than the previous one.

His feet carried him to your door that night. He knocked but didn't know why. Maybe he hoped to find some strength he didn't have.

You opened the door and glanced at him, confused. He wasn't okay, and he didn't look alright, either.

'Spencer? What are you doing here?' you asked, your voice laced with worry.

'I'm sorry I didn't call before coming.'

He didn't know how he managed to get words out of his mouth. Spencer was to a second to crumble.

'It's okay. What happened? Are you hurt?' Your eyes scanned his body for a sign of what was going on.

'I don't - I can't (Y/N). I can't do this. I need help.'

Spencer broke, sobbing at your door. You rushed to hug him; you didn't even care that you were in the middle of the hallway.

That night, Spencer confessed his sins, and he found nothing but understanding and support in you. He didn't know he deserved either of these things until he met you.

As you both got closer, he learned everything about you. In the same way that he confided his life to you, you did the same to him. And Spencer never hesitated when you needed him.

You called him sobbing that night. Your dad was suddenly admitted into the hospital due to an illness he hadn't told anyone before. You were his only close family member. Your mom left the country when your parents divorced a decade ago, and your two older siblings lived in other towns.

'Hey, I came the faster I could. What happened?' Spencer rushed into the hospital waiting room where you were. You darted your glassy eyes at him, with lips quivering.

'He isn't okay, Spencer. The doctor says he- oh God - he will not make it,' you broke, with a sob raking through you.

Spencer engulfed you in a tight embrace. You cried with your head on his chest. He would have given everything to rip off your pain and carry it himself.

You both stayed in the hospital that night. You at least could see your dad for a moment to say goodbye. At dawn the next day, he passed away.

Spencer remained with you through your grieving process and swore to be by your side and protect you for the rest of his life, no matter what.

And like that, life kept testing your bond with Spencer—failed relationships, elusive psychopaths, work injuries, friends gone, faked deaths, and so on. The BAU changed, but you both remained.

Sometimes, Spencer wondered if destiny was a real thing. Maybe with you, it was—his best friend.

He was truly happy having you in his life, but why sometimes did it feel like something was missing?

Spencer questioned his feelings about you for a long time. Was it something more than a platonic sentiment? Why was his heart filled with joy every time he saw your smile or heard your laugh? And it plugged with gloom when you were sad?

With time, Spencer was convinced he loved you but kept his mouth shut. He told himself he was over-reading the signs. And Spencer blamed his early lack of affection and inexperience in the heart's department. You undoubtedly didn't feel the way he did, and he was creating a whole imaginary world that would crush the moment the bubble popped.

People around weren't helping either. After telling Morgan how he felt about you, he kept telling Spencer that he needed to make a move.

JJ, for her part, let out her insinuations about how he should do something and the high probability of his feelings being reciprocated.

But Spencer wasn't sure, and the risk of losing you for overstepping your bond terrified him, so he said nothing.

And things could have stayed that way, but a light of hope for him opened time after.

Morgan and Hotch had left the BAU, and the team was focused on trying to catch Scratch. At the same time, Spencer was dealing with his mom's illness and her recently diagnosed Alzheimer's. As always, you were there for him.

"Are you sure you don't want me to go with you to Houston?" you asked him, sitting on his couch one night.

"No. It's okay. It will be only two days," Spencer assured you. He felt terrible for lying to you. He never did that before, but he knew you would talk some sense to him about what he was doing on his trips to Mexico.

"Will you call me if you need anything?" you insisted, and Spencer could only think how much he wanted to hug and kiss you. But he won't do that. He can't do that without telling you he loves you. Not without risking losing you due to a stupid love confession.

Spencer was so lost in his thoughts that he didn't notice his lack of response to your question.

"Spencer? Are you okay?"

With still a semi-hazed brain, his hands reached yours, and his eyes locked with yours. A frown of worry appeared on your face.

"Have I ever told you how grateful I am for having you in my life?"

A blush crept from your neck to your cheeks. It wasn't the first time Spencer had told you something like that, but how he looked at you that night, with that intensity, was making you weak on the knees.

"Yeah. A couple of times, if I recall correctly," you replied, trying to sound casual, but inside, you were aflame with his gaze.

"I think I should say it more. And to show it like it really is," Spencer mumbled, and you were confused. What was he trying to say?

"You mean like buying me more coffees and bagels?" you joked. You always did that when you were nervous, and Spencer knew it.

In a bold move and without letting your hands go, he scooted closer to you on the couch.

It was now or never. Spencer knew then this was his chance, and if he didn't take it, he would never do it again.

"Can - can I tell you something?" he asked, flicking his gaze between your eyes and your lips back and forth.

You noticed the gesture and were about to combust. Why was Spencer looking at your lips like that?

"Yes." Your voice above a whisper, fearing it could falter if you spoke louder.

"I want to kiss you so bad right now," he whispered back, so close you could feel his breath fanning your face. Your lips parted to say something, but no words came from them. Instead, you were the one who closed the gap between you both and kissed him.

Spencer kissed you back immediately with such urgency that you could feel the longing and desperation on his lips.

Deepening the kiss, neither you nor he wanted to stop. Fearing if you did, the moment would vanish, and you would wake up from this beautiful dream.

Maybe this was the chance you both needed to confess your feelings for each other. But fate could be cruel more than once.

In the middle of that years-making kiss, your phone rang suddenly. The infamous sound made you both jump back and return to reality.

Still dazed, you fished the device from your pocket. Emily was calling. You didn't know what to do. Should you answer your phone and cut the moment? Or ignore it and grasp Spencer's lapels to kiss him again?

Your bewildered look made Spencer decide for you.

"You should take that. Could be important," he said, voice laced with doom. He knew what was coming. You wanted to argue, but maybe he was right. Reluctantly, you slid your finger on the green bottom.

"Emily?"

The team had a new case, and it was urgent. You needed to be on the tarmac in twenty minutes.

"Can we - can we talk about this later?"

You were unsure where you were standing. Sure, you felt the electricity of that kiss; you didn't imagine it. But maybe it wasn't like you were thinking. Perhaps it was just the heat of the moment. A lot of things were happening, and you both were vulnerable.

On his part, Spencer saw this as a sign. This wasn't the time or the place. He didn't feel prepared to face his true feelings at the moment.

"Sure. Uh, but now you should go; they are waiting."

The bad thing is you never talked about that again. You went with the team to Connecticut while Spencer left the following day, not to Houston like he said to you. He went to Mexico.

The next time you saw each other was with Spencer in a cell in Matamoros.

There are a lot of things Spencer regrets about that infamous trip. One of them is to lose his chance to know if he could have built something more with you. How could Spencer imagine having a relationship with you now? After he lied to you? After falling in disgrace like this? You deserved more than a broken man, incarcerated and lost. Spencer didn't want to drag you with him and his misery. He couldn't stand the idea of breaking your heart for a failed relationship, but he didn't want to lose you either. The reasonable middle ground for Spencer was keeping you like his friend, as it has been until now.

After Spencer was released from prison, neither you nor him spoke of that night. He presumed you regretted kissing him, and he was afraid to say what it meant to him.

Everything got lost after his release. Spencer became reckless and superficial. He was a different guy. But everyone dispensed him due to the traumatic events he endured. You did it, too. You had stayed and committed yourself to him in the role you knew so well: as his best friend.

And that's what Spencer saw since then: you by his side, supporting him like the good friend you were. And he thought it was okay. You were alright, and he should have to live with the idea of not knowing what it could be to love you openly.

That's how Spencer immersed himself in a shallow and meaningless life, failing his true self and becoming a person he despised but who shielded him in his vulnerability.

-

The cell phone ringtone brings Spencer back from his thoughts. He quickly pulls it out of his pants pocket, secretly hoping it's you. It's a long shot, but he wants it so badly to be real. A short-lived wish because the caller ID shows it's Gabrielle, his late conquest.

Spencer lets out a heavy sigh, and your words come back to him.

'No! It's everything! Can't you see it? It's the way you lie to your teammates and the way you do your job like it doesn't matter to you. The way you turn everything into something meaningless. The relationships you have, your job, your friends. Everything!'

Spencer feels his body stiffen. It's like he's looking at himself from the outside, and what he sees terrifies him.

That's what you've seen in him, and he understands why you've walked away from him like that. The person he has become is to blame for your pain, and Spencer feels sick. He, who swore years ago to protect you from all harm, is the one who caused this.

'Do you really believe that? Do you really believe your self-destructive behavior only affects you? I didn't think you were so selfish, Spencer.'

Selfish. It's what he's been all along. And you had to be the one to throw it in his face to realize his mistakes.

Spencer doesn't have the energy or courage to answer the phone. He knows why Gabrielle is calling, and what 24 hours ago would have been a tempting offer now feels futile and pointless.

It's meaningless because the only truly significant relationship he has wanted all along is with you, nobody else.

And possibly you are in your apartment thinking Spencer is an asshole, believing he doesn't value you, that he doesn't care about you, that he doesn't love you. And while the asshole part it's true, he does care about you, and he does love you.

It may be too overdue, but it's time for you to know, he thinks.

With a resolution Spencer didn't know he had, he stands from his couch to grab his coat and keys. He is going to reveal his secret tonight. He is going to admit his underlying love to you and stop his charade.

During the car ride, he is having a pep talk with himself, trying not to lose the bravery that made him leave the apartment.

You have to know. He has to clear things up and get you back.

Spencer keeps repeating the words until he's at your door, calling with two solid knocks.

After some rustling from inside, the door opens, revealing your unhappy face. Spencer knows he deserves all the bitterness and pettiness you have and will throw at him, and he's going to take it all.

"You didn't check the clock before coming here, did you?" is the first thing coming from your mouth.

Spencer takes in your appearance. You're in your pajamas already, but the bags under your eyes tell him you weren't sleeping, and possibly you have been tossing and turning for hours now.

"I'm sorry. I know it's late, but we need to talk."

The roll in your eyes doesn't go unnoticed by him; it's like you weren't surprised by him standing at your door at 2 am.

"Spencer, if you want to talk about what happened this afternoon, I don't think-"

"Please? I know I behaved like an idiot today, but please let me explain," Spencer insists, and he really hopes you don't close the door in his face.

You contemplate your response for a second. Spencer knows you know he won't leave without talking to you, so you open the door just enough and signal him to come inside.

Spencer comes in and waits for you to close the door. The resolve with which he came is fading as his brain tries to organize his ideas and all the things he wants to say.

You gesture towards the couch, and he takes a seat. You too, but in a chair next to it.

Where to start? Spencer thinks about just blurting out everything and spilling his heart in front of you. But you are the one who starts talking.

"Why are you here?"

Spencer clears his throat. "I - I want to apologize for what I said. I hurt you, and I didn't mean to do that. I really didn't mean to do that."

"But you did," you say flatly, and he nods.

"I know. And I'm sorry. I let you down, and I feel horrible misreading the whole thing. I should have noticed."

Spencer barely blinks, trying to gauge your expression. You're difficult to read right now, and he hates it. You guys always were so good at reading each other, and he lost that ability, too.

"If you are talking about-" You seem ready to say something to not address the subject, so Spencer only blurts his question.

"Is it true? Do you love me?"

You sigh, shaking your head.

"Spencer-" You start, but Spencer doesn't budge. He needs to know and to hear it from you.

"Please, tell me," he pleads, and you let out a bitter chuckle.

"Why? It doesn't matter. It won't change where we stand right now," you convey with some treacherous tears fighting to fall. You avert his gaze.

Spencer stands and kneels in front of you.

"Please, look at me."

His index tilts up your chin so he can see your eyes. You surprisingly let him do that. "I need to know if you feel the same way I do about you," he whispers, his eyes fixated on yours. You furrow your eyebrows.

"What are you talking about?" One of his hands tenderly poses on your cheek to dry some of the tears falling.

"What I'm trying to say is that I love you. I have always loved you."

God, it feels so good to say it finally.

"W - What?" You look perplexed, and Spencer knows this is the opportunity he has to come clean with you.

"I know I didn't tell you sooner. It's long overdue, and even if I have my reasons, they don't excuse how I have treated you in the past months. But I promise things will change. I won't hide this anymore. Please, give me a chance to love you."

You seem overwhelmed with the information, so much so that you stand and start to pace in your living room. Spencer gets up as well and follows you with his eyes.

"Spencer, how- I - I don't understand. Why are you telling me this?"

"Because it's true. You are the one for me. I love you (Y/N)."

It seems now that he's said it once, Spencer spares no effort in repeating he loves you over and over again.

You stop pacing to look at him, an accusatory look in your eyes.

"Why now?"

Spencer understands your apprehensions. Of course, after everything that had taken place in the last hours, he comes to your door proclaiming his love. Logically, you are confused and don't expect it.

"Do you remember the night we kissed? The night before I went to Mexico?" He asks, and your gaze softens at the mention of that night.

"I do. But I thought you forgot," you say, casting your eyes down.

"How could I?! I wanted to do that for a long time. I couldn't believe we were finally kissing. It was like a dream come true for me," he recognizes, shorting the distance between you both and tentatively cupping your cheeks. You let him.

"But - but after the call, you - you told me-" you stutter, recalling the details of what occurred there.

"I know. I chickened out. After Emily's call, I thought it was a sign and not the right moment, so I backed off. There is no single day I don't regret doing that." Spencer's eyes glasses over, thinking about how foolish and blind he has been all this time.

"Why you didn't tell me?" you murmur, almost in a whisper.

"Because I'm stupid. Because I thought I was protecting you. I was in jail (Y/N); what could I have offered you?"

You huff and shake your head, putting distance between you both. Spencer's arms fall to his sides.

"And after that?"

Spencer knows you're talking about the time after he was released from Milburn. He gives you an apologetic look before answering.

"I thought I was doing the same. That having you as a friend was better than not having you at all," he concedes. Maybe it's the hardest part for him to admit because, when that happened, everything started to crumble between you both.

"So that was the friendship bullshit," you sneer. Spencer nods.

"Yeah. And I'll always be sorry for doing that to you. But I promise you, if you let me, things will change."

You go silent, mulling over his words, and it's like your defenses start to turn down. You look at Spencer with a mix of emotions he can't still crack. Maybe his words are void for you right now. That's why Spencer thinks showing you what he means is better than keep talking.

He slowly approaches you without breaking eye contact. With one of his hands, Spencer tilts up your chin while he leans down. He can hear the air hitching in your throat. His heart beats faster and faster as he gets closer and closer.

You do not move a muscle, nor do you reject his touch.

When his lips make contact with yours, you both let out a sigh you were holding. Your lips begin to move in sync. Spencer is kissing you, you're kissing him back, and there is no phone ringing.

Spencer gives you everything he has, trying to express he is yours and no one else's. You are both lost in a kiss that seems increasingly urgent and desperate.

But suddenly, you push him away. It's as if a jolt of electricity has struck you, shoving you away from him.

"Please, don't. Don't -" you mewl in a broken voice. Still dazed, Spencer looks at you, baffled.

"W - What's wrong?"

"I - I can't," you mumble, running your hands through your hair and shaking your head.

"Why not?" Spencer asks, and when you keep shaking your head and saying nothing, he starts to panic. "(Y/N), please. Talk to me."

"Spencer, I'm sorry. I can't do this," you repeat—this time with a steadier voice. "This isn't going to work."

Isn't it going to work? Spencer doesn't understand why you are saying that when you both just have admitted the truth.

"But I thought you loved me?"

Spencer's voice is small, frightened. It's as if, in five seconds, he went from the top of a mountain to a free fall into the void.

You look at him for a second, and it's like a realization hits you.

"So that's the reason? You are here and saying all these things because I told you I loved you?"

The accusing, defensive tone returns to you. And Spencer doesn't know what to do.

"No! I mean, yes! I thought a lot about what you told me. And I realized my feelings for you have always been there. That's why I'm here," he defends.

You insistently rub your eyes with your palms like someone who desperately wants to wake up from a dream.

"I'm sorry, but I can't believe you."

Spencer's eyes widen. You've closed yourself completely and thrown the key out the window.

"But it's true! I can prove it. I can be a better man for you if you give me a chance. Please." Spencer is begging, tears rolling down his face, but he doesn't care. He will do anything to get you back at this point.

"Spencer. Listen to me. Things don't work like that, okay? You hurt me, and I'm not talking about my romantic feelings for you. You questioned my loyalty as your friend. Do you know how that made me feel?"

"I'm sorry-" he tries to explain, but you cut him off.

"It's true what I told you earlier. I chose our friendship above acting on my love for you. And it seems I did it in vain."

Spencer shakes his head. "No, no, no. Don't say that. I know I did wrong, but I can make it up to you."

Can he really?

"Spencer, you need to make it up, but to you, not to me." Spencer's head snaps up.

"What - what are you talking about?"

You let out a deep sigh. "We both know you know."

"Prison," he confirms, embarrassed of what that word implies.

"And how your life has been since then."

"I know I fucked up. I hurt you-"

If thousands of apologies are necessary, he's willing to give you all of them.

"You hurt people, Spencer! Not only me! You fooled around; you have been treating women poorly and playing with their feelings. You have lied to your friends and pushed them away. And the worst part is you have been hurting yourself with all this!"

Spencer's eyes squeeze shut. You are right. He knows that. But he is so terrified about you walking away from him that he can't see the big picture.

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."

"I know you do. But I can't do this anymore. Supporting your self-destructive actions is not helping anyone."

"I know. And I'm not asking you to do that. I'm asking for a chance to show you I'm the guy who would do anything for you. Please?"

"Spencer, that's exactly my point. You must heal because of yourself, not because of me or anyone for that matter."

"I'm not-"

"Listen to yourself. You say you want a chance? But you only ask it after I poured out my heart this afternoon. How can I trust you when you have only shown me this version of you? Don't ask me to believe it."

There are a lot of things Spencer knows he has to do. He has a lot of mistakes to face and make amends for. But he fails to realize that the first amendment he needs to make is to himself.

That's what you have been trying to tell him.

"Are you saying there are no us?"

It's almost a rhetorical question at this point, but Spencer asks it anyway.

You look at him with sorrow in your eyes.

"There is nothing I want more than to be in your life, but in these circumstances, I don't think it's possible. Not when you must clear your head and think about what you want first. For real."

"But I love you; please don't ask me to step away."

It's another plea. The last resource Spencer has in him.

"I'm not asking you for that. What I'm asking you is if you really love me, don't drag me with you in this process you're going through now. I can't - I don't have the strength to stay by your side in this one. I'm sorry, but I need to think of myself this time."

"(Y/N)-"

"And now, I ask you for you to leave, please. It's late," you say, walking to the entrance and opening the front door.

It's late. Those words mean so much more to Spencer now.

It's too late for a love confession when you've already ruined everything that supported it.

It's too late to try to fix the mistakes he has made with you. Even tonight, it was daring to come to your home late at night, being inconsiderate of your space and time.

There is no way he can do something now without hurting you.

Maybe time will give him a hand, and the wounds will soften. Spencer hopes that by making real changes in his life, you will see he really meant everything he has said tonight.

What Spencer doesn't know is that you won't be around to see those changes happen.

——————

Spencer Reid's Taglist: @dreatine @nomajdetective @jayyeahthatsme @rosalinasam2 @averyhotchner @lovelyxtom @princessmiaelicia @pastelbabygirl19 @reidsbookclub @alexxavicry @gspenc @spencerreidisbae123 @calmspencer @pauline5525mgg @anamiad00msday @milivanili99 @laylasbunbunny @leahblackk @miaxx03 @missabsey @taintedstranger @khxna @hiireadstuff @pleasantwitchgarden @dysphoricsanity @levi-of-starz @themoonchildwhofell @silver138 @lovelybaka @shinytinywhispers 

For those who asked for a part 2 (I'm so sorry for the delay): @gghostwriter @sebastiansstanswhore @evvy96 @pillsbury-doughgirl @singinghamtaro-blog @atlantica-angels @lukesmainpiece @ladyofhellhounds @gubzgirl @shqwqrma @hereforfun-31 @reader1402

[hoesformatt]

CUFFED

matt smut, I’VE BEEN FEELING FREAKY DEAKY (doja cat ref) + get ready for the pussy to pulse + I WROTE THIS WITHIN 24 HOURS CAN I GER AN APPLAUSE

sub!matt • poc!reader friendly

contains: SUBMISSIVE (I mean it) MATT, pet names, mommy kink, matt x tutor, oral (m!receiving), handjobs, fingering, riding, spitting, choking, hair pulling, cuffs, titty sucking, no use of y/n

word count: 1.8k (my longest yet)

semi-proofread ✍🏾

Matt stacked up the textbooks on the table and I sighed at the sight of the tower he had made with them. “Do I really have to study all of this” I rolled my eyes, watching Matt pace around the room. “You ask that at the start of every session, the answer never changes.”

I had to take tutoring because I was kind of flunking my university classes and it was only the first semester of my first year. My parents made me take these sessions since they paid for my 4 years.

Half of the time, the sessions sucked. I hated studying for hours at a time and writing all my assignments by hand. The other half of the time, I was too busy staring at my tutor, he is just too cute.

His brow-line glasses that sat up on his perfect nose, the dorky button-ups he wore that only looked good on him, sometimes I just wanted to kiss his cheek. Matt would get antsy and blush whenever our skin would touch but he would always move away ‘to keep professional’ or whatnot, what’s so bad with a little handjob or a quickie?

“Alright, are you ready to start? This assignment is due in 3 days” He pulled out his seat beside me and I was already regretting not taking an edible right before this. “Yeah whatever,” Matt looked up at me, unamused, flipping through the textbook and finding the right pages.

A whole hour went by and everything that Matt was teaching me was going through one ear and out the other. “Ok, I can tell you don’t care what I’m teaching you” He folds the book together and it makes a loud clap sound and pushes the notes and other things to the side.

He was clearly annoyed by my behaviour and I just wanted a reaction from him, or what’s in his pants. I might be a little wrong for trying to bone my tutor instead of learning but this was my way of fun.

Matt lifted himself from his seat to go on his way into my kitchen, “I’m kinda hungry” He opened my fridge, examining everything in there before closing it again with can of Dr. Pepper. He ran his hand through his hair, leaning on the kitchen counter and I couldn’t help but adore the boy.

“Do you have anything to eat?” My mind strayed to inappropriate thoughts and they lingered in my brain until he cleared his throat. I opened my snack drawer and my tutor was enlightened by the amount of food. “Take what you need,” Sitting back on my seat, I closed my thighs together tight because everything he seems to do was so… Attractive.

Especially his hands, the way he would play with his pen… I wanted him to play with me in that way.

I was thinking that I could kill two birds with one stone, getting Matt to do my assignment and getting him to cum in me.

“Matthew, c’mere” He was alarmed by the way I used his full name and his cheeks turned red almost instantly.

The chair he sat at was so far away and I needed him close to me “How do you expect to learn or read the textbooks when you’re that far?” Matt pushed his chair towards me, nibbling his lip as he was in close proximity to me.

“Where we left off?” I nodded, not even paying attention to what he was talking about. A few minutes went by and Matt showed me one of the picture examples and pointed at it. While I leaned in, I placed my hand on his thigh, sitting in closer.

He bit his bottom lip, leaning back and putting down the book after I saw it. My hand never moved and I could tell by his expression that he was fighting the fact that he liked it.

It had gone quiet as caressed his thigh, inching closer to his crotch and he just watched, being more relaxed by the second. Matt’s eyes were glued to my clevage, taking off my top in his head.

I applied pressure to his cock, groping his tent and instantly, a high-pitched whimper escaped his lips and one of his hands slapped over his mouth and the other around on my hand. He gazed up at me, waiting for me to repeat my actions.

“Do you want me to touch you, Matthew” I asked for consent, “Y-yes,” He answered hesitantly with his head tipped down. I gripped the hair at the back of his head pulling up his head “Talk to me nicely,” I teased “Yes p-please,” I let go, satisfied.

“Take your jeans off” Ordering Matt, he immediately unzipped his jeans, dropping them to his ankles and he was about to remove his briefs but I stopped him.

Reaching out to hold his hardened length, his girth was amazing and I fondled with his length. When I found his tip and rubbed it relentlessly, earning whiny moans from him, he jerked around in his seat, gripping the table.

“Mhmm-more” Matt thrusted upwards, craving more friction between us, his whimpers were music to my ear as he never stopped making those noises. I giggled a bit at how much of a pathetic mess he was and I haven’t even touched him raw.

The brunettes’ cheeks were a bright pink and I pulled on the band on his boxers, peering in to see his tip was a similar color. He begged me to touch his raw dick, practically humping my hand, out of breath. Pressing my cheek against his bulge, it was fun to see his face twist from pleasure to impatience. “Fuck! Just touch me! Please touch me!” His inappropriate outburst took me aback.

“Get in the room and sit up on the bed and I’ll touch you,” Matt took off his pants fully, taking himself to my room and leaping on my bed with his legs open.

He ignored the cuffs that were on each side of my bed and when I entered my room I held a silk blindfold. Matt gaped up at me as I unlatched one of my handcuffs “Give me your wrists” he looked at me worriedly, raising him arm to give it to me.

I clicked the cuffs on, checking if they weren’t too tight and I did the same to the other wrist. I made sure the only thing Matt could touch were the bars of my baseboard, “I’m gonna tell you this one time, you do not yell at me, you hear me.”I slipped off his glasses, getting a good look at his sky eyes before tying the knot of his blindfold.

Impairing his most important senses, stripped the boy of his restraining briefs and his cock flew out. I etched every part of his perfect length in my head from his rubbed-off pink tip to his long, thick length, that I dragged my tongue on.

I stuffed his shaft into my mouth, deep-throating his length before pulling it out and spitting on it. “You like that?” Matt's grip on the baseboard bars tightens as he moans out loudly. You could hear sheer pleasure in every moan and gasp as I sucked his length.

“Y-yes—oh fuck... f-faster,” His body starts to squirm “M-mhh…” I stroked the end of his shaft that couldn’t fit in my mouth, squeezing and stimulating the cum out of him “Are you gonna cum?” I teased Matt while I smiled at him with a twisted pleasure face. I watched his squirm on the bed, cuffed to the bed and unable to see me work on him.

Matt nods, as he can't speak from all the pleasure. He moans loudly, thrusting his hips into your mouth, and with a final moan, he reaches his climax. “Oh fuck— oh shit!” He pumps his load into my mouth. “You’re such a good boy for me.”

He nodded once again and Matt blushed hard at your words, but he was still riding the high of his climax. I straddled him and he tried to fight the tight cuffs, he wanted to touch me badly, trying to control his breathing as he felt my wet cunt against his shaft.

I began to bounce on his cock, slowly removing my top so my tits could fall in his face. I put my nipple in his mouth “Suck baby” Matt complied, sucking on it softly, before nibbling gently.

As I rode him harder, his breathing became harsher, trying to hold back a moan. “Oh fuck yes Matt, suck harder” I rode his harder, making sure all of his inches fit inside my heat, I watched his length disappear within me. Matt nodded while he sucked harder on your nipple, leaving a small hickey on my skin.

Matt moaned, pleading for me to take off the cuffs and the blindfold. He tried to steady himself as he felt the pleasurable sensation of his cock sliding in and out of me. Loosening the tie of the blindfold, I removed it from his head and he was met with my breasts bouncing in his face.

“Do you deserve to have the cuffs taken off, baby?” I sat on his length, completely taking every inch of him inside my wet walls, enjoying the feeling of him throb inside. “Yes I deserve it, yes, yes I do—,” Matt was so fucked out he could barely make sentences.

The sounds of the cuffs un-clicking put Matt to ease and as soon as they were removed, he groped my ass, sliding me down upon his lap. “Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck…” Matt threw his head back exposing his adam’s apple.

“Lemme cum, mommy I need to cum” He cupped my breasts in his warm hands putting them in his mouth again and sending vibrations down my nipple with his moans. My eyes rolled back aggressively and the sounds of the bed creaking got louder.

Our moans were uncontrollable and every time his tip hit my g-spot, my orgasm came closer. “Are you gonna cum with me baby?”

“Yes, yes, yes—Shit!” I felt Matt ejaculate in me, glazing my walls while my cum mixed with his coated his shaft and with my liquids. When I lifted up, to pull his cock out, my ass and his thighs were covered in our cum along with my bedsheets.

“Your dick is so good I might not make you write my assignments.”

tags: @lunariaxzz @chrissturniolosbitch @leahsbussy @mattslolita @muwapsturniolo @idkwhosnyla @zayyluvz @i8kth @nonamegirlxsturniolo @mattssluttygf @78yaz @love4chris @mattslutt @nickgetsmewetter @hearts4chriss @thenickgirl @jnkvivi @cottoncandyswisherz @imaslut4kehlani @babyddolly @carvedtits @chaossturns @conspiracy-ash @kriissy4gov

[nocturne-the-gazer]

Apology Tour Review

I typed this while I watch the episode. Warning this is screenshot heavy. I still watch the show on YT because I need subtitles sometimes but do not worry, I have ad blocker.

This was my face when the episode ended.

The tonal whiplash from the end of EP8 to the beginning of EP9 is jarring. I am tired of hearing Stolas and Blitz talk about sex like we get their whole relationship is build off of it but ugh. It is probably my sex-repulsive talking but it just sounds childish. No one talks about sex like this unless they are teens who laugh when they see 'bitch' in the dictionary.

The anti-Blitzo party reminds me of the episode Gone from SpongeBob where everyone left the town because it was National No SpongeBob Day, and they went to build an effigy on SpongeBob and burn it to the ground.

'I do not look down on you' Stolas has called Blitz fetishy pet names since Season 1 and even called him a 'plaything', that does not sound respectful to me.

Why the fuck did Stolas called Striker Blitz's friend? Does Stolas think all imps know each other? What is next, he thinks all of them look the same too? That is not a racist mindset at all. Blitz not saying 'He is not my friend' at all makes that line even worse. Also, unlike Stolas, Blitz spends time with his daughter and tries treat Loona like how his father treated him.

Oh, more WLW/Sapphic rep, that is nice. The fan artists are going to have a field day with this. This is a win for the WLW/Sapphics.

Me when I get a notification on Twitter.

VEROSIKAAAAAAA!!!!!! MOVE YOU FUCK OWL THE REAL STAR OF THE SHOW IS HERE

Me when I am in my Hater mode. She is having the time of her life! You go girl, SLAY!!

I love me a cute background character and I found one. I love cat themed designs.

Put Verosika back on screen. Me listening to this song, UGH. These lyrics are awful. YAWN. Fuck Stolas, I cannot feel bad for his bitch ass.

'I do not even know why you would want to be with me' Blitz is right about this. What does Stolas see about Blitz outside of sex? Stolas only talks about how good Blitz is in bed and that is it.

'I want to know what it is to not be alone' ????? You are not alone; you have a whole ass daughter!

'I want to be someone's someone'. It is probably my asexuality talking about I am not a fan of media saying stuff like this. Being alone is ok. You do not have to in a relationship to be happy. Being in a relationship is not going to fix your problems. You got to love yourself before loving someone else. I wish I was high while watching this show. Sounds like a fun time and I can just turn my brain off and be like 'OHHHH PRETTY COLORS!!!!" /lh

Damn he fine as hell. Stay away from him Stolas!

YES, THE QUEEN! Blitz being an awful partner to that many people is crazy minus Stolas because they were not dating.

STAY AWAY FROM HIM! I am also tried of the damn tongue kissing. THAT SHIT IS NASTY!! People actually do that????? in real life?????

"Bird stealing"?????????? YA''LL WAS NOT DATING. HAVING SEX WITH SOMEONE IN A CASUAL WAY DOES NOT MEAN YOU ARE DATING THEM!!! Stolas needs to spend time with Via, not kissing some random dude at a party.

Damn, this guy is fine as hell too. Anyway, why are trans guys always in the background? That is another post for another day.

My final thoughts/review:

This episode was not as boring as Full Moon, but I am over Blitz and Stolas as characters. Their relationship is like stale and moldy bread. Even though he was drunk, everything Stolas said to Blitz feels hollow. I said this already in this post, but every time Stolas mentions Blitz it is in a sexual fetishy manner. Their relationship was built off of sex.

I wish there was more of Verosika. I like the scene with her and Blitz before the stupid 'bird stealing' line. Her revealing that she was vulnerable when dating Blitz is pretty sad and I hope that she never forgives Blitz like Fizz forgave him.

I wonder if Verosika knew the full story of Blitz and Stolas' relationship. Would she still be on Stolas' side because clearly, she only knows one side of the story and clearly do not want to hear Blitz out because how he treated her.

One positive: Shout out to the background character artists. All the designs are cute, creative, and more appealing than the main cast. Shout to these cute in particular, they are super cute. I want more of them not this bland and tasteless yaoi.

My overall score: 3/10

Needs more Verosika, less Stolas and his pity party.

[torturedpoetmanor]

heyyyy twinnn 🤗🤗🤗🤗

can i request ej sfw and maybe nsfw head canons pleaseeee🙏🙏 more specifically for a shy reader (yk me) 😞😞

thank you twin!! mwah 🤍

Eyeless jack general SFW & NSFW headcanons

SPECIALTY: headcanons, SFW, NSFW

CW(S): fem!reader, public sex, breeding, praise, dumbification, oral sex (m!receiving), nicknames (sweet girl, little lamb, etc), P in V, vanilla sex, hair pulling,

LMK IF I MISSED ANY :3

A/N: ty twin for help starting the creepypasta acc with this request MWAH hope u enjoy

❀•°•═════ஓ๑♡๑ஓ═════•°•❀

·˚ ༘₊· ͟͟͞͞꒰➳SFW

So you two kinda met before his whole..yk demon thing

meaning u guys dated!! And it went smoothly until he disappeared…

He disappeared for a long time which meant he ghosted you but soon came back

he didn’t mean to scare you he really didn’t :(

He just wanted to apologize for ghosting you, he tried to calm you down as quick as possible to explain everything

He knew you were still scared since it’s not everyday you see a grey skinned person with sharp teeth and mask to hide his face

He instantly saw you get shy on him again which he remembered it when he first met you

You tried to avoid eye contact as much as possible, talked in a soft voice, fiddle with you hands, played with your clothes even

“I missed you, sweet girl”

“I missed you..ah..too..”

“Getting shy on me again hm? My poor baby is she nervous seeing me again?~”

“I’m going to bed..”

Everytime you say ur going to bed he knows its because you’re flustered

Would definitely steal stuff for you and leave them on your nightstand before morning!!

Tries to keep you away from the slendermansion and forest as much as possible since he doesn’t want the other hurting you

He’s really happy you accepted how he looks and is now, he really is, he understands if it takes awhile to getting used too but he doesn’t mind waiting

if your grossed out and don’t want to see him anymore, if you say the word, he’ll leave

“Here you go, babydoll, a perfect necklace for a perfect girl”

He protects you 24/7

If you don’t think he’s around, trust me, he is, he doesn’t want other flirting or being mean to you

·˚ ༘₊· ͟͟͞͞꒰➳NSFW

Now before his whole transformation the sex between you guys was good, very passionate and lovely

But post transformation WEEHHH ITS STEAMY

He loves fucking you until your brain turns into mush or making u so so so dumb for him

His dick is more longer than before hehehe…

He loves watching you suck his dick, the way your head goes down and how his dick hits the back of your throat, he’s on cloud 9

He loves pulling your hair to make you suck him faster and the way your throat bulges everytime you go down

Jack loves taking you behind your home or a safe place in the forest to fuck you. Jack always wanted to get frisky in public so he thought this was a good idea

the day when you said it was alright to try it. The both of went to the forest at night, jack laying out a think blanket and a pillow for you to relax on

He helped you get undressed so quick as he did the same with himself

Watching you get on your back, jack felt himself get more horny than he already was

Then after he inserted himself into you it was all over for you and him

‧͙⁺˚*･༓☾ a little drabble ☽༓･*˚⁺‧͙

“Ah! Oh jack! M-more!” Y/N moaned out as he gripped his shoulders. Jack just smirked as he went faster and harder, gripping the blanket under you. “You like that little lamb? The way I hit all your sweet spots?” “Y-yes! Oh fuck..” all you could do was moan out more as your eyes roll in the back of your head.

When you two had sex you always knew he could make you scream. But what you always forgot when you two do it was jack knows all your sweet spots to make you dumb for him. Hitting the spots Jack begins to move at an angle hitting your sweet spot inside your pussy as he played with your clit. All you could do was drool and lean your head back more.

“Does my little lamb like it? Or is she too dumb to speak right now?” All you could make out was moans. “My baby, so out of her mind, I guess that’s what I do when I get to pound ur pretty pussy, don’t worry I’ll keep going and make you cum as much as possible~”

[bubbleebubz]

I can't handle change pt 1.5

SORTA SMUTT!!! FEM MASTERBATION SLIGHTLY, READER IS A VIRGIN AND HAS NO EXPIERIENCE!!

I'm awaken feel a cold sensation between my legs, a yogurt and a cold wet water bottle slide off the blanket and between my thighs, making my nipples harden from the cold abrupt feeling. I look around, finding Spencer still next to me, where he was when I fell asleep, but now he to was in a light slumber, his head resting on the window next to him. I smile and see the damp sticky note on the yogurt. "Eat this, we don't need your lack of energy to ruin the case", it read. I roll my eyes. I stare at the strawberry yogurt in front of me for a minute, pushing my lack of appetite and craving for coffee aside and gobble the yogurt down and chug the water. "Good girl" I feel a breath in my ear causing me to jump, I whip my head over to look at him, just to see him with a shit eating grin but still 'sleeping'. I groan in irritation after feeling another weird sensation between my legs, clenching them together to relive the unknown tension.

"Spencer I know your awake, it wasn't a ghost." I whisper, looking around to see if anyone was still awake. But nope, they were out like a light.

"We will be landing in 15 minutes" Spencer whispers again but this time does not attempt to fake sleep. I slap him out of fear. "Stop doing that" I whisper yell at him. He puts his hands up "it's not MY fault your so jumpy" He exclaims with a grin.

We get off the jet, in the middle of no where Texas.

"Ok team, because this town is so old and small, there is only one motel, meaning we will need to share rooms. So, Emily and JJ, Morgan and Garcia, Me and Rossi, leaving Y/N and Reid. " Hotch says, looking down at the notes he has taken. "What, Hotch you can't make me bunk with her" Spencer says, annoyance clear in his voice. "Yes I can, Reid, this is the pairing its always been, but Y/N is new, so you cant be in your own room any longer." Hotch says, brows furrowed. Spencer scoffs in annoyance grabbing the room key, before walking off and past me. "I get the bed closest to the door" He mumbles before I follow behind him. "Okie dokie, but I get the shower first" I say, not all to happy on the situation either.

We get to the room that thankfully has 2 beds, I set mine down on the chair before grabbing my pajama's and bathroom products and entering the bathroom, shutting it behind me.

"Locks broken, just my luck" I mumble before undressing and turning the shower on and turning the temperature up to the hottest setting due to the old pipes and the slow heating.

I wait impatiently for the water to heat up before getting in, letting the steaming water cascade down my body. A shudder leaves my body making me let out a sigh. My thoughts start racing to earlier. The strange sensation between my thighs returning. "Good girl" My brain plays in memory. I slip a hand between my thighs, exploring my parts. A moan leaving my lips at the new sensation. I rip my hand away in fear before finishing my shower in a rush and running out of the bathroom in my pajamas. "Hey, you ok? You were making some strange noises in there" Spencer asks, now in a pair of grey sweats and a black t shirt, he was laying on his bed reading a book. An un-noticeable bulge in his pants, but it was noticeable to her, everything was noticeable to her right now. Her eyes were glued as he stared at her, waiting an answer. He smirks, confused by how on edge she was.

"Y/N" He says, catching her attention. "yeah? hmm?" She asks, gazing back up to his eyes. "Are you okay? You were making noises in the shower" he says, still smirking.

"Oh yeah no, I mean ya, I'm good, just some new things, I don't know, s'all" She says, rubbing the back of her neck nervously.

He just nods, letting her off the hook.

She lays down on her bed. "I'm going to bed now, goodnight Spencer" She says quickly.

She falls asleep, the wetness between her legs still evident.

[citruswriter]

Yandere Bayverse Turtles x Receptive Darling

Listen in with me! ↻ ◁ II ▷ ↺

Warnings: Yandere, dark themes, obsession, unhealthy relationship.

A/N: Gonna give the turtles with different kinds of receptive darlings so be prepared for that. Mlem.

Leonardo x Reader 💛/🩷

Warnings: Violence, blood, degrading, mentions of carving into Reader's flesh, begging, mentions of marking.

You feed into his ego so badly. Like it's gone so far that you wouldn't even be able to THINK about leaving at this point.

You lived by yourself in New York City. You were "strong & independent". But when Leo came in and started manipulating you to be his damsel in distress, you welcomed the advances.

Of course, you're not dumb. You knew exactly what he was doing. You could tell he was manipulating you, that he was utterly obsessed. But it felt so nice to have somebody fawn over you. To have somebody want to pamper you and do everything for you.

You'd take any chance you could to just pout or cry and fling yourself into his arms. You could tell it did wonders for his ego. The victorious grin, the glimmer in his eye.

Oh and he thought he was so slick too. He didn't realize what you were doing until one day he overheard you and April talking in the kitchen.

"(Y/N), you need to get out while you still can. Leo's utterly obsessed with you! You're so clueless but he's manipulating you." She said in a worried, hushed tone. He wasn't expecting your response.

"Oh I know full and well what he's doing." You replied with a giggle.

April stood gawking at you. "If you know then why don't you leave? You still have a chance to escape!" She said, trying desperately to reason with you.

"And why would I do that? You said it yourself, he's utterly obsessed with me! Try finding a man like that these days." You shot back, rolling your eyes.

"That's not what I mean and you know that. He treats you like this porcelain doll. He wants you to be his little... damsel in distress or something. Fully reliant on him". As much as April loved Leo, even she could see how unhinged he was with you.

"April I'm not stupid. I know exactly what he's doing. I'm letting him do it. It's so nice to be able to just turn off my brain and be his little fragile doll". You said with a little sigh and April shook her head.

"For fucks sake. You're just as obsessed as he is! You're both deranged!" She exclaimed before leaving.

"So you love turning your brain off around me, hm?" He'd question, startling you. You'd bite your lip and bat your eyelashes up at him. "Yea, and?"

The two of you become inseparable after that day. He demands you quit your job and move in and you do just that.

Everytime somebody tries to "save" you, you run and hide behind your lover, shouting about how they know nothing and that they're just jealous.

Since you're so compliant, he let's you wander around in the real world (but only at night) while he follows from a distance.

Heaven forbid somebody flirt with you.

It's not that they have to worry about Leo. Oh no they need to worry about you.

You love seeing Leo get angry and jealous. You're such a manipulative little shit.

You'll lead the poor lad on before coming back home and pouting, telling Leo that some guy tried to take you away from him. That it was so terrifying and you really thought that you were in danger.

Leo will come home, coated in blood, and all you'll do is giggle and kiss him.

NSFW

When he confronted you in the kitchen after your conversation with April, he had to restrain himself from taking you in the kitchen right then and there.

"You're a little minx, aren't you?" He growled out and you just brushed the palms of your hands over his plastron. "Not at all. I just enjoy being spoiled by you".

He took you to his room, slinging you over his shoulder, and fucked you til you were cockdumb.

You kept begging him to mark you, so everybody could know you were his. If you hadn't inflated his ego before, you certainly were now.

You love him fucking you after he's killed somebody for you. Seeing him come home all splattered in blood just gets you all hot n bothered.

Leo finds it amusing. He thinks it's so cute that his darling gets all horny from it. He can smell your arousal almost immediately as you eye him up and down.

You love just randomly straddling him and making out with him while you grind against him. Bonus points if he places his hands on your thighs.

He knows your body inside and out and you love it. Sometimes you'll be a brat on purpose just so he can remind you of that fact.

You also love it when he gets jealous. You might get your outside privileges revoked for a bit but you love flirting with other people just so he'll drag you back home and fuck you all night.

He'll make sure you remember who you belong to. He knows exactly what you're doing. Knows you did it on purpose just to piss him off.

He'll bully you and degrade you as he fucks you numb. "Such a slut aren't you? Could've just asked me to fuck you but you wanna be a whore instead. What do you think you're doing flirting with other men? You're mine, darling. Mine. I'll carve my name onto your skin if I have to. But you'd probably enjoy that, wouldn't you? You're such a slut for me".

Can and will make you scream his name until your throat goes hoarse.

ʚ♡ɞ ʚ♡ɞ ʚ♡ɞ ʚ♡ɞ ʚ♡ɞ ʚ♡ɞ ʚ♡ɞ

Raphael x Reader 💛/🩷

Warnings: Kidnapping, violence, forced voyeurism, breeding, creampie, marking.

You love making him chase you. Cat and mouse is one of your favorite games apparently.

Raph isn't exactly one to manipulate. He's one to demand. You're his. No this is not up for debate.

The two of you were close buddies for months, courtesy of being April's roommate.

You'd be lying if you said you hadn't been crushing on him but you didn't exactly expect him to kidnap you.

So when you woke up in his bedroom all chained up with Raph stroking your hair, you were more than surprised.

You yelped in shock and tried to push him away in a panic. "Raphael what the actual fuck?! Couldn't you just ask me out like a normal fucking person?"

"No. I couldn't risk you rejecting me. You're mine. We clear?" He'd growl back, trying to assert dominance and intimidate you.

He's shocked when you pull a bobby pin out of your hair and start picking the locks of your chains free. "I would have said yes, fucking idiot". You'd reply with a roll of your eyes.

You guess living rent free isn't too bad. But eventually you get bored. You love Raph but gosh. There's nothing to do!

So you make a run for it. Raph's pissed, of course. How could you do this to him? Couldn't you just accept that you were his?

You managed to escape him for a solid three days, where he finds you in some random guy's apartment.

Raph wasted no time busting the door in and beating the living shit out of the other guy that no doubt touched his darling.

"Finally! Took you long enough. I was starting to think you didn't actually love me." You said with a pout, arms crossed.

Raph isn't taken off guard easily but here you were, doing exactly that to him.

"Wait... I thought you tried to escape?" He questioned, tone somewhere in between annoyed and confused.

"I didn't try. I did escape. Temporarily. But I wanted you to find me. Come on, the lair is so boring sometimes. I just decided to spice things up a little. I knew exactly what I was doing. I left a trail on purpose." You'd smirk over at him before demanding he pick you up like the spoiled brat you are.

Eventually he'd just chuckle and kiss you. "So you want to dance with danger, huh darling?" He'd question.

"Only if it's with you." You'd all but purr back.

NSFW

He'd fuck you in that apartment right then and there, he doesn't care if the guy he just beat is still alive and watching.

He loves it too. Every time you get bored and decide it's time for him to chase you, he'd fuck you in front of whichever poor fellow had fallen victim to your games this time.

"Bet you wish you could fuck them half as good, huh? Hate to break to you pal, but you'll never be able to fill them up like I can".

And as if to prove his point, he'd make you describe how good it felt. Poor lad would just sit there, crying and upset as you just babbled out how great he felt.

How full you were, how big he was, how great your body felt in that moment as you all but begged him to breed you and claim you as his all over again.

Angry sex is something you have a lot too. You're such a little shit. You love pissing him off just so he'll tie or chain you up and fuck you till your leaking with his cum.

Beg him to mark you and he'll be over the moon. Bite marks, scratches, bruises, all of them. If he wasn't obsessed beforehand, he is now.

ʚ♡ɞ ʚ♡ɞ ʚ♡ɞ ʚ♡ɞ ʚ♡ɞ ʚ♡ɞ ʚ♡ɞ

Donatello x Reader 💛/🩷

Warnings: Stalking, violence, blood, forced voyeurism, marking, begging, orgasm denial, somnophilia, Reader gets roofied, creampie, breeding, pregnancy mention.

Donatello is a master at manipulation.

Unfortunately for him, so are you.

Donnie denies his obsession for you at first. But as he finds himself stalking you more, putting tiny cameras in your apartment, putting a tracking device on you without your knowledge, the more he starts to realize that he's absolutely obsessed with you.

The first time he tries to manipulate or gaslight you you just turn your head to him in shock and confusion before laughing at him.

"Oh Donnie! Please! Don't think I don't realize what you're doing." You'd muse, making him curse internally.

"I don't know what you're talking about, (Y/N)." He'd say casually with a shrug of his shoulders. But he'd watch you as a mischievous smirk would crawl it's way onto your face.

"Oh you wanna play that game, huh? Alright. I'll humor you". You'd purr out.

The next several times Donnie would attempt to manipulate or gaslight you, you'd gently call it out. But that wasn't all. Oh no. You started doing it back.

It became almost like a game between the two of you to see who could successfully manipulate the other one first.

Unfortunately for you though, as patient as Donnie is, his patience isn't infinite. Especially after you make the fatal mistake of getting a partner.

You come to his lab the next day and he cages you against one of his tables, towering over you in a way that made your heart race.

"Enough of the games. You're mine, understand?". He'll growl out and you give that mischievous smirk once more.

"No I don't think I do. See, you took too long Donatello. Your loss. Sorry". You were doing this on purpose, he'd realize. You wanted him to lose control. You wanted him to go feral, to make those threats.

He'd chuckle and grab your chin, jerking your head up to look at him. "Oh you're cute if you think I'll take no for an answer, darling". He'll reply with, causing you to bite your lip and give him innocent doe eyes.

"Leave them or I'll kill them in front of you". He demanded and you just gave a sadistic giggle. "Promise?"

Poor guy didn't see the light of day ever again.

NSFW

True to his word, he didn't take no for an answer. When you went home, he snuck into your apartment.

You put on a real show. Really you did. You flirted with your partner, kissing their cheek and letting them feel you up.

They went to kiss you on the mouth but Donnie ripped them away from you, picking them up by the throat and tossing them to the ground.

Your partner would find no solace in you however. They'd beg you for help but all you did was stand there giggling as Donnie beat them.

But Donnie wouldn't kill them. Oh no. He had other plans. He'd bend you over the counter and fuck you in front of your poor partner. Drilling into you from behind as your partner just laid in a pool of their own blood, sobbing from the pain.

He'd fuck you until you were almost over the edge before stopping, making you sob and beg for him to keep going. He'd grip your hips til they bruised, relishing the sound of your pleads.

"Who do you belong to, hm? Say it. Say you're mine, and I'll give you anything you want." He'd softly demand, tugging at your hair to pull your head back so he could nuzzle your neck and breath your intoxicating scent in.

"Y-You. I belong to you Donnie. Only you. I'm all yours, Donnie. Please. Please let me cum on your cock. Please Donnie I need it." You'd all but babble out, causing Donnie to chuckle condescendingly down at you.

"Good pet. You're mine". Is all he'd coo out before fucking your wet hole once more until you finally came on him, a whine being ripped from your throat as he fucked you through your orgasm until he finally came himself.

Donnie loves marking you, especially with bruises.

He also loves hearing you beg as he slings your legs over his shoulders and makes you squirm and sob in a way that only he can.

We already head canon this man as being a somnophile but it's so much worse if he's a yandere. Mans will legit roofie you just so he can fuck your unconscious body for several rounds. The only evidence upon waking up being his cum that's slick against your thighs.

If it's possible for him to get you pregnant, he absolutely will. Get you full and round with his babies. Now you can never leave him.

ʚ♡ɞ ʚ♡ɞ ʚ♡ɞ ʚ♡ɞ ʚ♡ɞ ʚ♡ɞ ʚ♡ɞ

Mikey x Reader 💛/🩷

Warnings: Bondage, begging, marking, exhibitionism, pregnancy mention, breeding.

Mikey is probably the "best" yandere to have. He's super fun loving and laid back.

Unfortunately for the world, you're a little sadist.

You two are an absolute power couple and you're just as obsessed with him as he is with you.

Ya'll both love talking shit too.

This man will literally hold you with one arm in such a way that you might as well be the angel sitting on his shoulder.

You'll lean in and whisper gossip into his ear with a sadistic smirk and he'll just smirk back at you, maybe chide you for being mean, but kiss you none the less and tell you that he loves how your mind works.

Believe it or not, you were the one that asked him out. He was ecstatic when his darling was the one to make the first move. He was even more so when it quickly became clear that you were just as crazy obsessed as he was.

The two of you are an unstoppable force and it's almost impossible to see one of you without the other being close behind.

The two of you are so clingy with each other, always touching or intertwined in some way.

You bring out a darker side to Mikey. The way your twisted mind indulges and encourages those darker yandere thoughts in him is so dangerous but so delicious.

He's also super possessive. Don't get me wrong, he'll give you your space and he knows you'll never leave him but boy oh boy does he love making it known that you're his. That there's no escaping him. That he's your forever home now.

NSFW

Another darling that loves to play cat and mouse. You love making him chase you through the sewer until he finds you and traps you.

He'll drag you back and tie you up with rope and you'll just beg him to let you go with a bite of your lip.

"Please Mikey? Please? I'm sorry. I promise I'll be good. Please baby? I'll do anything. Anything for you." He knows you'd never actually run away but chasing you and then tying you up while you beg to be let go just does something to him.

He'll fuck you long and hard after that. Marking you and demanding that you tell him who you belong to.

He's such an exhibitionist too. If he can fuck you in public, he will. In the living room under a blanket? Done. In the alleyway a little to close to where a car's headlights could illuminate the two of you? Give them a story to tell their friends.

Another one that would absolutely get you pregnant if he could. He enjoys the thought of seeing you waddling around with a full pregnant baby after he worked so hard breeding you.

Like the little shit you are, you love fucking around and finding out. And by that I mean you allow others to flirt with you all the time.

A man comes up to you and says you're sexy? Oh you'll let him prattle his head off all the while your eyes will slink over to where you know Mikey is and smirk.

Mikey, hidden away from all but you, will run his tongue over his teeth and chuckle at your antics.

And when you get home? This man his stuffing you full and bullying your cervix.

"You're such a slut. You know that? If you wanted my attention, you coulda just asked instead of letting that man eye fuck you." He'll degrade you but you're such a brat

"But there's no fun in thaaaaaat." You'd whine out with a pout, crying out as he'd angle your hips to abuse that spongy spot within your velvet walls.

"You're so fucking needy. So fucking thirsty for me. Fuck, I love it so much. Love you so much".

*aggressive giggling* I enjoyed writing this way too much. Might extend them into their own full on one-shots. Maybe not Leo's though... I'm so fucking bad at writing Leo. *sobs*

[stevesnightmares]

Actually, while I'm here, let me also briefly touch on the 33 officials and Mu Qing on the mountain and what my view on it is.

Mu Qing wasn't completely wrong. That doesn't mean he didn't hurt and help humiliate Xie Lian, that doesn't mean that he shouldn't ask for forgiveness or that he's innocent. Just because your actions aren't unjustified, it doesn't mean they also aren't hurtful.

After the first banishment, they were desperate, poor, couldn't get a decent job and the King was sick. The situation was so bad Xie Lian even tried to rob someone and then got so drunk his stupor lasted for two days. Mu Qing, as said before, had to also take care of his sick mother on top of everything else. Now he finally found himself in a very good position thanks to which he could make enough money in an honest way to help both himself, his mother, Xie Lian, Feng Xin, the King and the Queen. Should he have put everything at risk now that they finally had a chance at getting back on their feet?

“But I wanted to solve our current problems before considering anything else! Your parents and my mother, the three of us, who knows how long we would have had to struggle in this quagmire! But I thought that if I went back first, maybe we’d still have a chance—”

There was no winning for Mu Qing, had he sided with Xie Lian everyone would've also turned on him, not only putting his position in danger but also achieving nothing: the 33 officials would not have backed down, the only way to make sure the situation wouldn't get worse was for Xie Lian to leave.

“It wasn’t me!” Mu Qing exclaimed. “I didn’t hit His Highness—I only asked him to leave. Other than that, I didn’t say anything harsh, and I didn’t move against him! They were determined to take over that spiritual land, and it would’ve kept escalating if you didn’t leave!”

After the whole ordeal went down, Mu Qing immediately run after Xie Lian and offered his help because, while he knew why it had to be done, he also wanted to make sure Xie Lian was fine and probably felt guilty.

Suddenly, a hand was extended to him. Xie Lian blinked slowly at it, and his eyes followed the arm up. It was Mu Qing again. He was standing next to Xie Lian with his hand outstretched, looking a little ashen. A long moment later, he asked stiffly, “Are you all right?”

Nonetheless, he kept his hand outstretched. “Come on.”

After Xie Lian refused his help, Mu Qing still found where they were staying and offered his help even if he knew he could've gotten in trouble because his goal was to help both his mother and Xie Lian with the money he had making.

Seeing Xie Lian so quiet, Mu Qing said softly, “I heard you need medicine. I’ll think of a way to get some later.” “Sounds good,” Feng Xin said. “I’ll give my thanks, then. We do need all that stuff right now. Heavenly officials can’t give mortals private gifts, so you be careful too.” Then he shuffled over to Xie Lian’s side and whispered, “I’m pretty surprised that he actually came back to help. I’m the one who judged him wrong. In any case—”

Mu Qing knew what he did hurt Xie Lian and felt bad and guilty and not only apologised but even let Xie Lian take his anger out on him

Mu Qing bowed his head. “I’m sorry.” They’d known Mu Qing for so many years, but this was the first time they ever heard him say those words—it was also his first genuine apology.

“Yes! I was wrong, I admit it, and I apologize!”

[Xie Lian] lost his temper and started throwing the sacks at Mu Qing. White rice spilled across the ground and made a mess of Mu Qing. Nonetheless, the black-clad man only raised an arm to block and held back from making any further move.

Would the moral and right thing have been to stand by Xie Lian side even if it meant making everything harder? Yes. That would've been the most upstanding thing to do, what Hua Cheng would've done had he found himself in such a situation. But that's not how Mu Qing's brain works, how he thinks, and in his own way he was just trying to make the best of a fucked up situation. He found a way to help Xie Lian and his mother and thought that that was the thing he had to hold onto so that they could all get back on their feet. He knew Xie Lian had resorted to trying to rob someone and now he had a way to make sure that something like that wouldn't have to happen again. How could he let that slip through his fingers?

Again, this is about how part of the fandom treats Mu Qing and not Xie Lian, who at the time was mentally unwell and couldn't think straight because of all of his trauma, pain and fear and who was just humiliated and felt betrayed and abandoned by one of his closests friends.

I think when it comes to Mu Qing and how the fandom treats him this is what summarises it best:

"So why can’t you accept hardship as an excuse when it comes to me?”

For everyone else everyone makes excuses and easly understands why the character did what they did, but Mu Qing desperate actions taken during a period of hardship and pain are always villainised and contorted into something ugly and mean.

His actions had hurtful consequences but he had good intentions and immediately went to apologise and make up for it. I understand why Xie Lian at the time and his state wouldn't want to forgive him and told him to leave, but I don't understand why the fandom acts as if Mu Qing is a terrible and unforgivable person who enjoyed hurting and humiliating Xie Lian and only used used him before abandoning him.

[poppitron360]

*Rummages through my fanfiction folders*

*Pulls this dusty artefact out and holds it up to the light*

————————————————————————————————

“WELL AT LEAST YOUR MOM’S IN ELYSIUM!!!”

“…What?” Frank said, after a few seconds of stunned silence.

Leo wiped his eyes with the back of his sleeve.

“I talked to Nico. Your mom. She’s in Elysium because she sacrificed her life to save others. My mom…”

He turned away from Frank, and leaned against the railing of the ship, staring out at the sunset. “It’s not fair,” he said, “She gave up everything so she could raise me. She made so many sacrifices in order to keep me safe. But they were small sacrifices- not big ones. She’s in Asphodel, suffering eternal torment, only half-remembering who she was… who I was…”

Frank remembered the time he had spent in Asphodel during Hazel’s flashback. How the half-formed souls wandered aimlessly, crying out for lives they only partially recalled. Hazel had spent an eternity down there and never found her mom.

“What’s the point? What’s the point in all this,” Leo gestured to the ship around them, “What’s the point in doing any of this if I’m never gonna see her again? Why bother even trying to go to Elysium if I can’t reunite with her? If I can’t make things right?”

Frank wanted to comfort Leo, reassure him, tell him everything was going to be alright, but he couldn’t find the words. His mind was still reeling from the conformation about his own mom. She was in Elysium. He could see her again. But he felt guilty for the thoughts. Leo was suffering.

“Anyway, I’m sorry for lashing out, I just… I guess I envy you. And I’m bitter. And I’m angry.”

He gripped the railing tighter, and Frank thought he saw slight heat waves coming from it.

“You have a right to be angry,” Frank said, “It’s not fair that the gods won’t let you get closure.”

“The Gods…” Leo muttered, and then chuckled, “When are they ever fair? When is life ever fair?”

Frank nodded, “The fates are cruel.”

Leo sighed in agreement.

“But there could be a chance, I mean, you might…” Frank began, but he trailed off when he saw Leo shaking his head.

“I don’t wanna torture myself with the “what if”s and the “if only”s. My mom’s gone, those are the consequences I have to face.”

“But it wasn’t your fault, what happened to her.”

“That’s what Jason keeps telling me.”

“And he’s right.”

Frank moved towards him, exasperated, “Look, Leo. It’s crappy. I can’t even begin to imagine how crappy this is for you. I’d like to tell you that it will get better, but it might not. But you shouldn’t beat yourself up about it, okay?”

Leo looked down, blinking back tears.

“That probably didn’t help,” Frank admitted, “I’m sorry. Jason’s way better at comforting you. I’ll go get him-“

“No, you can stay,” Leo said.

Frank walked back over to the railing and leaned on it next to him.

“Just… when you see your mom in Elysium…” Leo said, “Give ‘er a big Frank bear hug, and don’t let her go, okay? Make the most of the gifts you’ve been given. I mean… at least my mom was there for me when she was alive.”

Frank nodded, “I will. I promise.”

————————————————————————————————

VALZHANG NATION FORM RANKS AND ADVANCE!!!!

@lokiwiiiiiii @lavenderfairiez @yoshuko-ew @keefessketchbook @frankzhang-appreciation-posts

Also, can’t find the post, but this was inspired by someone writing a short fic about Leo’s mom being in asphodel and it sent Valzhang brain going.

Also also, if you want to be tagged in my Valzhang posts lmk- I am forming an army.

JOIN US!!!!

[nohoperadio]

Some years ago while I was working in a grocery store my then-colleague lost his wedding ring--it was always a slightly loose fit apparently, it must have fallen off somewhere without him realizing, after a week or two he'd searched everywhere and it became obvious it wasn't going to turn up, he needed to get it replaced, he was pretty upset about it.

A few weeks after this I saw him at work and he held out his hand and said "do you like my new wedding ring?" And--look, I don't know shit about rings or jewellery, my opinion means nothing here, but his new ring wasn't your traditional gold wedding band, it wasn't metal at all it was a continuous band of some kind of blue-green gemstone looking material--well anyway my immediate thought was that he'd found a children's plastic toy ring on the floor or something and was making a joke, that's what it looked like to me, to the extent that literally no other interpretation of the situation even entered my brain at that point. So I went along with (what I thought was) his silly joke and said, completely deadpan: "oh yeah wow, it's beautiful!". And he said aw thank you and started talking about how he was sad when he lost the old one because it belonged to his dad who had recently died and he'd been intending to give it to his own kid when they got married but he's really happy with the new one and--suddenly a switch flipped in my brain like oh FUCK, this is actually the new ring I was just making fun of oh jesus christ!!

And in that moment I was so grateful for the fact that sarcasm exists, that it's a common thing humans do and that it happens to be my style to do sarcasm as deadpan as possible with no exaggerated tone or anything--everything happened to align such that one of the rudest most brutally insulting things I've ever said in my life, to someone I liked concerning something very important and emotional for them, just so happened to be exactly the same as what I would have said if I was being nice and polite. I quietly switched modes from sarcasm to sincerity and the conversation went on with nobody any the wiser.

[coupstatu]

step 1, taking the first step. make some time.

tldr. (or the summary) showing up seems to mean a lot, but jihoon isn't well aware of this.

word count. 3 pics, 272 wc.

the way they are written do not represent how they actually are, everything is fictional.

note: if the tweet has 0 likes, retweets, comments etc. it is not meant to be taken as a tweet (meaning no one can see the tweet but the readers, so it's an intro to the chapter as usual but jihoon cannot see it) but still an advice.

04. list of steps. other works.

"what are you-" blinking your eyes at him, as if it would dispel the image that your brain made up. but the real jihoon was standing there and is not part of any of your imagination. "aren't you too busy to come?"

he winced at the spite in your voice that you tried to push down, you knew it was petty and it probably shouldn't matter so much but you can't help but to feel just a teensy bit upset. placing down a small paper bag on top of your booth, the booth was practically empty right now as it was near to ending.

"i'm sorry, i wanted to come see you at the very least." pushing the paper bag towards you, he placed his hand on the table and leaned his body towards you. "when do you end? let's get takeout and eat at home, together."

eyeing the paper bag, but not taking any initiative to move towards it. "what is the meaning of this?"

"sorry, i didn't know how much it meant for you if i showed up." he sits down on a spare chair that was beside you, he assumed your partner had ran off to do who knows what at the event, maybe running off to buy food. "i'm still learning, so please be kind on me. i want to make this work, so bad."

his sincerity seeps through and makes your heart ache, "fine, let me pack up and we'll go." you stood up but turned back to face him with a smile that he didn't know he would adore so much.

"let's go, my passenger prince."

taglist. @winterwallacehenderson @strawberry31 @moonkyeom @wootify

[candiiee]

Requested(?)by @lovelywritersgarden !

Part two to drunk Izuku x reader!

Part one: https://www.tumblr.com/candiiee/753649065513926656/i-have-made-another-oneshot-inspired-by

——————————

ɪɴᴛᴏxɪᴄᴀᴛᴇᴅ ᴛᴇᴀ ᴘᴛ.2 ✧.*

Drunk! Izuku Midoriya x reader

Warnings: swearing and slight suggestive thoughts

——————————

Pain. Pain. Pain. Izuku groans, holding his head as it throbs. Drinking. It’s coming back now. Y/N helping him to his house. He blinks, hearing some stirring beside him. He glances beside him, and freezes. Y/N is sleeping beside him. His face goes red. He immediately glances down at himself, oh thank god.. he thinks, I still have my clothes on. We didn’t do anything inappropriate. He pauses. What did we do though? He can’t remember.

He breathes, calming himself down. He can’t think straight because of the pain. Thank god Y/N gave him water and gave him kisses to convince him. Wait, kisses? What. The. Fuck. He feels sick. His face is flushed. Not only because of the hangover, but because he may have let his feelings for Y/N slip out. He messed up so bad. She was so understanding during his drunkenness. He mentally slaps himself. He wants to pull out his hair and scream. Stupid stupid stupid. He berates himself. You fucked up so bad. Now she’ll never wanna date y-no, no, you’re friends! FRIENDS I SAY. YOU CALLED HER PRETTY, (well she is, but you meant it in not a friend type way) What would Kachan do? He’d probably freak out and just spill his guts. But who knows. He continued to think a mile a minute, turning redder and redder.

Suddenly, his thoughts stopped, and his brain froze. “Izu? That you?” He gulped, glancing down to his side. Y/N had awoken. He nervously scratched the back of his head. “Uhhhh, no?”

Y/N blinked, sitting up and muttering to herself. “How’s the hangover?” Through all his panicking, he had completely forgotten about the pain. Now that she had reminded him, he felt it. “Fricking awful.”

Y/N nodded, rubbing her eyes. “Figured as much.”

He cleared his throat, better talk about it now than never. “So… how much do you remember about last night?” He said, blushing furiously. Y/N blushed as well, her face turning a deep shade. “Um..I’d say all of it.”

He buried his face in his hands. “I’m so sorry!” Y/N patted his back. “I know. But.. did you mean it..?”

He gulped, “I-I-I-yes! Everything! Except that part about water tasting bad!”

She cracked a smile, though it quickly disappeared once his words registered. “I..I see..”

She paused, taking a deep breath. “Izu, I really don’t know what to say.” He nodded, looking at his hands. “It’s fine. It’s my fault for ever drinking in the first place. Are we still friends?”

Y/N paused, taking a deep breath. “Honestly? When you confessed, I had never really thought of you in a romantic way. But…”

He held his breath.

“It got me thinking. I had always pushed away feelings during Highschool. Whenever I felt something fluttery in my stomach I blocked it out. Didn’t dwell on it. And, well, now that I remember, you were the one who usually gave me the fluttery feeling.” He blushed, gripping the bedsheets. “R-really?!”

Y/N nodded. “Really.” Izuku deeply inhaled. “So.. now what? You basically just confessed you like me to, so..”

Y/N bit her lip. “I honestly don’t know.”

Izuku paused, then gathered his courage. He took Y/N’s hand in his, blushing deeply not looking at her. “Y/N, can you please consider going out with me? I really really like you. And I want to be more than friends.”

Y/N blushed deeply, the red hue covering her cheeks. “I..yes, Izu.” He mentally pumped his fist into the air. “R-really? Yes! I mean, that’s cool. That’s cool.” Y/N giggled, and he practically melted. He had done it. He had actually managed to get the girl. He would rub that in Kachan’s face. Denki and Uraraka were gonna be so proud of him. Oh wait, he supposed to be feeling the effect of the hangover. Oh, there it is. Oh shit he’s gotta vomit. WHY NOW??!

——————————

Soooo, was it good? I tried. If anyone wants me to write another one shot for MHA, I’d be happy to :))

(I only do x readers cause I have no imagination.)

I gotta figure out how people organize their oneshots so pretty-

[koralinewrites]

Hi !!! It’s so nice to see a new DL blog! 🥰 I wanted to ask how Laito would react to realizing he likes someone past lust, and being in a mutually loving relationship ❤️ (against the odds I know)

Thank you so much for the ask!! I’ve read the entirety of Laito’s romance route and manga through translations, and the first half of your question is answered in them. Therefore, the part about him realizing he’s in love is less headcanon and more ‘canon’ canon based on what is shown! 

**Also, sorry if you wanted more of a ‘fic’, I can definitely do that. This ask just unleashed the Laito brain rot I’ve been having, if you can’t tell from the speed at which I answered this-

Laito would start to realize his feelings early on, but automatically ignore them. To him, love, affection, and feeling good are all the same because of how he was… taught… by Cordelia. His idea of ‘love’ is that it’s just words people use to get what they want.

So Laito doesn’t like the idea of thinking of someone else as ‘special’, because why would they be? He’s used the idea of love to get what he wants before, and he doesn’t like the idea of someone else changing his perspective on that. He would try to convince himself that the feelings he has for said person were just because they gave him pleasure, even though deep down he would know the truth.

Because when Laito doesn’t like something, he ignores it’s existence. This is shown when he ignored the fact that he had earned Karlheinz’s powers in Lost Eden, because he didn’t want to acknowledge that he was related to that man.

It would ultimately take some major thing to happen to the person who he fell in love with for him to come to terms with what he’s feeling. An example of this would be Yui ‘dying’ in Laito’s route in More Blood, making him face that he missed her and she was more to him than just pleasure.

And even then, he would still be plagued by his trauma with Cordelia and such. He even recognizes this himself in Lost Eden, stating that he has to be killed and reborn to overcome everything. He would still have the memories of his trauma, but it wouldn’t have any emotional ties to him anymore.

This is where it gets more headcanon, once he gets into a relationship without his trauma holding him back.

He’s a genuinely very sweet man, but he’ll definitely have to be taught about boundaries. He’s still a pervert, reborn or not, because that’s just who he is.

He’s also more open with his emotions. Originally, he would keep a mask on 24/7, hiding what he feels. Now, though, he’s learnt to be more open because keeping it inside hurts everyone involved.

TEASING. This man loves to tease. Always and forever. Seeing his S/O’s face turn red in public because of something he did/said?? Yes please!!

On the flip side, he’s become more affectionate. Not like he wasn’t before, but he would start to hug just to hug without any sexual intentions. 

Imagining Subaru’s back hugs but with Laito instead-

ANYWAYS-

He’s sweeter, too. His words originally were nothing but empty promises, something he said just to get a reaction or pleasure. NOW, though…?

His words seem more sincere, like he genuinely means it when he says “I love you”.

And to end it all off, I shall include my favorite confession from one of the CDs. 

“Thank god...To think that for the longest time...I believed that I did not need something precious...or special to me...Yet right now, I can’t even phantom a life without you...That’s a huge change of heart...for me personally. So, please? From here on out, till forever. Or till your life comes to an end is fine as well... Stay with me, okay?”

Again, thank you for the ask!!!!

[my-rose-tinted-glasses]

Question (because i'm curious and because i love enabling friends' hyperfixation): what is Tengu no Daidokoro? Why do you like it? What are you hoping for in a s2?

Also, should i watch it?

I adore Koisenu Futari and i have other similar queer-people-in-their-daily-life Japanese shows on my watch list (i loved my dining table and i have Kinou nani Tabeta and Tsukuritai Onna to Tabetai Onna waiting) that i just know i will love once i have the time to watch it!

Is Tengu no Daidokoro anything like it?

Thank you so much for this ask cause it gives me the opportunity to share my love for this show and also maybe make other people want to check it out.

Before anything else. This is not a queer show. All those shows you mentioned are some of my favourite shows, as you can see by my choice of pfp I adore Koisenu Futari as well. Kinou Nani Tabeta and Tsukutabe are magic and I really hope you get to them because they are so amazing. But Tengu is not that. It's an absolute gem and I adore it.

Now. Why do I love it? Why I am excited like it's christmas morning and I still believe in santa? So many reasons...

-IT'S GORGEOUS (if I hadn't binged this ,I would've giffed every frame)

I mean the greens are just incredible. All the colours in these show are actually. The change in the colours is amazing as well. My delusional brain will believe that this second season was made specifically so that me and @colourme-feral could once again lose our minds over THE GREENS.

-It's about two brothers. (I love stories around family)

Motoi (older brother played by Komagine Kiita) and On. A city 14 year old who comes to stay at his older brother's house in a rural area. They are estranged and have little in common. On is the perfect representation of 'kids these days...' (I know I'm getting old when this is what comes to mind), completely hates the idea of being away from the city and technology and internet (I related). Motoi is at home here, he's very quiet and calm. I love them. I love this relationship. I love how it grows and I can't wait to see where they go next.

-The food. (I love food)

Motoi has his own vegetable garden and he makes everything from there or other local sources. Just like the shows you mentioned in your ask, the food is a major ingredient to this story. It's the thing that brings these brothers together as well. the scene in the above gif is one of my favourites because of that. Not gonna give you spoilers.

-The dog. but also...

this is where the show takes a different turn than you'd expect. although not really because it's in the synopses, but if you only knew this show from gifs and this post you would not see this one coming. There's a supernatural element to this show. For starters that cute dog you see there, he talks. He's a talking dog!!! And he is delightful. but also this

(Can we just stop for a second and appreciate how beautiful Kiita is? I barely recognized him in 25 ji.) So yeah it's in the show's name, Tengu's Kitchen. Tengu's are a legendary creature from japanese folklore and the brothers are descendants of them. (more info here about that if you're curious).

-The three of them.

I adore them. I don't want to say more so you'll just have to watch it.

-the setting (did I mention it's gorgeous?)

I know I've mentioned the visuals but it's not just that. it's the scenery and the rhythm and the music (I love the ost of this show) and the everything. Look I watch shows for a bunch of different reasons. This one, I watch it, or rewatch it as the case may be, for my soul. It's beautiful, it's soothing, it's touching, and I feel better after watching it. I really can't explain it any other way.

There are more things I could say honestly but this is already so much longer than I intended. But it's 10 episodes of 30 minutes and as with a lot of jdramas, an incredible human @aoinousagi has fansubbed it for our viewing plesure. here is the link to their post.

These are just some of the reasons I love it and can't wait to watch more. I never expected it but this day is better because of that announcement alone. I'm so happy. I will do rewatch soon, and probaly gif more of it so maybe more people will want to check it out.

@yannig thank you so much for this question. Sorry if it's a bit of a incoherent mess but I'm really excited and having trouble putting it into words. And I know there are a lot of shows to watch and not enough time to watch them all, so of course no pressure, but if you're ever in the mood for something that is wholesome and beautiful I do recommend it highly.

[cloudmancy]

again. sorry for clogging your website time. this whole wuvvy & rue & hob conversation is sooooo messy in my head cuz like. Yup. everyone loves Plot Thing. and the only folks whose analysis and art and everything of it i enjoy and which make the gears in my head really turn are big haters (slash very complicated relationship) of Plot Thing. i nod to and understand every word. nothing made more sense. the problem is im head over heels for Plot Thing. what is even the move in this case. just try and save equestria.

I get this sort of sentiment a lot ('I love your art but I HATE your opinions/I hate what your opinions are doing to my brain'). I have very strong thoughts on plot points/themes since I pay close attention to them for art purposes. I also tend to keep to myself and draw what I want... I think at no point in my entire d20 watching history have my thoughts ever aligned with the mainstream fandom 😭😭😭

historically people have seen a lot of success dealing with this by either a) sending me hatemail [please don't] b) becoming my friend and assimilating with my thoughts [fun!] c) producing content of THEIR point of view. what I mean to say is if this is about you liking ruehob but you can't unsee the fact that ruehob is kind of built on cardboard foundations and wuvvy gets totally overlooked... you simply have to assimilate that into your own head and synthesize your own point of view. it's there and you can't IGNORE it but... who says you can't still be into it? maybe ruehob have a gutting realization 3 yrs in and then they have a serious discussion and they come out stronger and happier together for it. maybe they have terrible coping mechanisms and there's some sort of a plot event that forces them to work together more closely and rue discovers what love is to them for real. maybe wuvvy goes back to the court of hoof and claw and finds a lesbian situationship. I don't know! the world is your oyster, up to you to make pearls out of it. I'm just the grain of sand.

[brittlebutch]

it's actually so fascinating to me that Brennan has created a character that maintains a pretty relaxed and mild-mannered demeanor and has said multiple times that the absolute Core of her is "FEAR" and how often we see this Fear manifest specifically in Avoidance; it really nails a relationship to that mentality where your brain fully Stops recognizing the emotion properly out of like, sheer self-defense from the stress of having to carry it all the time

I think this is also perfectly showcased in the way we tend to see Tula swing so suddenly from 'level and steady' to 'snarling Panic' and then back again - Just because your brain has detached itself from the Conscious Recognition of the emotion doesn't mean it can Actually stop itself from experiencing it. So the Fear is always there and always acting as a stressor, but because of that inability to Identify it there's no way to recognize or address it before that final straw hits and your bodymind jumps Straight into Full Meltdown Mode; but then once again, once you drop even a Little bit below that Peak Terror your brain ceases to process the emotion; it's like the most exhausting form of Poor Object Permanence in the world

And even if Tula is aware of this happening to her, that doesn't really make it any easier to deal with / address. Even if you're able to spot the symptoms Around the emotion -- chest pain, irritation, nausea, whatever -- because the Emotion Itself is basically impossible to find, you can't really Successfully Pin Down what the problem is OR a way to cope with it. If you can't figure out That You Are Anxious, then figuring out What Is Making You Anxious is impossible, which makes Find A Way To Make Peace With That incomprehensible. That's where the Avoidance comes in: you can no longer identify what might be a Dangerous Situation, which means that Anything New has a big potential to be Really Bad in a variety of ways (ranging "I don't Feel Good" to "Fully Lashing Out bc you've entered Fight/Flight and can't get out of it" to "Actual Outside Danger This Time") and that means the Only Way you know how to be Safe is to just Avoid Doing Anything New and Only stick to Familiar Situations, because anything unfamiliar is a monster of a gamble you don't know how to prepare for or cope with

[kijosakka]

an early birthed day gived to myself