#what gets me about this that in the SIX MONTHS chris has been gone there has been absolutely zero kind of development on eddie's part

[daniclaytcn]

Your tags on that post are so me. Like I loved the weston call so much and it just. Amounted to nothing (for now caveat I guess but I dont have hope for much more lol). And even if it led into eddie’s 806 plot like it was supposed to it still wouldn’t have been great? And it would have been sooooooooo easy to, instead of zoom in on eddie’s face, have him pull out his phone and be like “hey chris. Miss you. Love you” in a text and then see chris like. Thumbs up it. Or in masks he could have been like “chris told me he isnt doing halloween” during the hen/chim convo and then they could have been like oh hes talking to you again? And eddie could have said sometimes I can get a text reply from him now. Like it did not even have to be a whole resolution of the eddie/chris plot if they preferred to drag it out for some reason still unknown to me. just some sort of movement in a direction where the audience knows where the plot is going to go and can feel hopeful about it would have been much better writing. Because honestly I think that is part of the general issue with the eddie plot right now, everyone is (fairly) annoyed and/or freaking out because going into the 8th episode of the season we have no idea if/how/when the eddie chris stuff will be addressed and quite frankly we have had two (2) scenes addressing it directly beyond the surface level in the whole season: bday party scene and confessional scene and at this point it is not enough for us as fans but also its not even enough to keep non-fandom fans engaged and anticipating eddie and chris’s reunion imo

^^^ yeah, pretty much everything you said! even if having chris on-screen is an issue right now because gavin isn't available (though, as always, i firmly maintain that they had no business doing a storyline like this in the first place if gavin's availability was in question to begin with — as it clearly was in s7, with how little he was on-screen even then), there are still a million ways to handle it better and indicate to the audience that it's at least progressing! it would still be sloppy and would suffer from being the result of an incredibly stupid storyline to begin with; but it would be better than us being six months into chris being gone with him barely talking to eddie even now, if the show is any indication on that front! frankly it's making me wonder if the writers have no clue how to actually resolve this, so they're just tossing it to the side and kinda ignoring it for all intents and purposes. which. idk what to even say about that. it just makes me so mad.

[chronicowboy]

bet the house (watch it fall) | 1.2k

"Bless me, Father, for I have sinned. It has been six months since my last confession," Eddie says, a perfect recital of the line he'd spent all morning in the bathroom rehearsing.

For a long moment, silence. Eddie has to fight the urge to check there's actually someone on the other side. Then —

"Eddie?" It's a familiar voice. One that has the tension seeping out of Eddie's shoulders all at once.

"Yeah," he breathes out. "Yeah, it's me."

"It's good to hear your voice again," Father Brian says, a hint of a smile in the words. "I wasn't sure I would."

"I wasn't sure either, but, uh." Eddie digs his left thumb into the middle of his right palm until flesh yields to bone. "I needed to talk to someone, and I wasn't sure who to go to."

Not true. Knew exactly who he'd go to. Bobby. But Bobby was gone. And Buck would have been his next choice, but Buck was hanging on by a thread, and Eddie wasn't going to be the one to break it. He'd just be the one to catch Buck when it finally snapped.

"You're always welcome here," Brian tells him, and Eddie has to squeeze his eyes shut against the tears.

"This was my captain's church, you know?" he rasps. "That's how I knew about it."

"Captain Nash."

"I, yeah. How did you —"

"He spoke about you a lot. Spoke about all his firefighters, but especially you and a... Buck?"

"Yeah." Eddie huffs a wet laugh. "That tracks." Wonders what exactly Bobby would say about him. Imagines he must have painted a pretty tragic picture.

"I was very sorry to hear of his passing. He was a good man. I find that's increasingly rare in the world right now."

"He was something else alright." Eddie takes a deep breath, gathers up all the grief and the guilt in the back of his throat. "I wasn't here when he died. I found out over the phone." His voice breaks, and Eddie takes a moment to gather himself. Father Brian lets him. "Buck told me. And, God, I've never heard him like that before."

Except that's not true, Eddie thinks. He's heard it once before. When Los Angeles was half-drowned, and Buck was dirty and bloody and soaking wet and shaking, and all he had left was Christopher's glasses.

"I moved back to Texas to be with my son," Eddie says suddenly. Can't linger in that memory for long. Not if he wants to make it out of the confessional.

"Ah, I see." Another smile creeping into his voice. There's something about the way he speaks that reminds Eddie so much of Bobby that he has to turn his thumb, so the nail digs a crescent moon into the soft flesh of his palm. "You followed your joy."

"Yeah." Eddie sighs, drags a hand down his face, laughs a broken noise. "Left a hell of a lot of it behind though." Holds his breath for a moment. "With Buck." Waits for God to smite him down.

Nothing.

"Well, you can only fit so much in a U-Haul," Brian says easily. It startles a laugh out of Eddie. A real one this time. Sharp but real. "I'm sure he took good care of it for you."

"He did," Eddie agrees, just as easily. Then averts course like a coward. "I'm just. Stuck. Now. I'm having a hard time getting myself back to Texas even though my kid's there."

He leaves out the part where Christopher keeps telling him he's not allowed to come back until he's sure Buck is okay. It feels too big for such a small space.

"And why do you think that is?"

"I wasn't here when my team needed me. I don't want to make that mistake again."

"Are you thinking about coming back?"

Eddie laughs again. Another empty thing.

"I've been thinking about coming back since I left. I just. I never thought it'd be like this. Because of this." He shakes his head. Doesn't bother fighting the tears this time. "I wanted coming home to be happy. That's the only reason Chris is still in Texas. I didn't want him coming home to another ghost."

"That makes sense," Brian says not unkindly. "But, Eddie, I have to say, it still sounds like you're denying yourself joy."

And there it is. That fucking word again. The one that's haunted him since the juice bar. Since Buck on his doorstep. Since Eddie flipped that goddamn tablet and it took his whole world with it.

"Maybe." Eddie shrugs. What right does he have to joy when Bobby's was taken from him so cruelly? "Bobby told me once. He said that I didn't have to lose everything before I allowed myself to feel something." Those words have been on his mind a lot lately. Every time he looks at Buck, and he wonders if Bobby had seen something Eddie had never been able to look too closely at. "I didn't know what he meant at the time."

"And now?"

"Now, I know I haven't quite lost everything, but I've lost a hell of a lot, and I don't want to have to lose anything else before I allow myself to feel joy." The words come out hoarse and hollow. Eddie thinks, in another world, he'd get to say this to Bobby. And he tries to imagine the smile he'd wear when Eddie said it. That thing so full of pride, so naturally paternal. It winds him a little.

"What does joy look like to you, Eddie?" Father Brian asks gently.

"Christopher." Eddie huffs a breath, looks up at Bobby wherever he may be. "Buck."

"Mm." Eddie glances at the partition, just for a second, catches Brian's smile as he ducks his head. He loses his breath a little, looks back to the doorway. "What are you gonna do about it?"

And that's the question. The one Eddie's been trying to answer since he left. Since before that maybe. Since a quiet, half-honest conversation in Buck's loft. The one he gave up for Eddie. Since the lightning strike. Since the shooting. Since the well. Since Evan Buckley.

"I've got joy right in front of me." He shrugs, smiles just slightly. "I'm not gonna walk away from it again."

"Alright then." The smile is unmistakable in Father Brian's voice now. The way Bobby's would be in the engine when he was trying to keep them all focused but, instead, found himself getting sucked in. "Your penance —" and Eddie supposed he should have expected it, bringing this into God's house, but he'd thought— "is one Hail Mary."

"Only one?" Eddie blinks. He looks back at the partition, finds Father Brian's warm eyes already there.

"Something tells me it's gonna be a big one," he murmurs. Eddie ducks his head to hide the flush of his cheeks. How terribly easy he must be to read. How many people must have read him cover to cover before Eddie could even bring it upon himself to open the fucking book. How inevitable it all seems now. It's Buck. Of course, it's Buck. "Good luck, Eddie."

[ericshoney]

Driskill Hotel ~ Brothers!Sturniolo Triplets

Summary: You join your brothers in their trip with Sam and Colby

Warnings: swearing, ghost hunting, nicknames, protective!triplets, targeting, spirits, crying, slight angst, fluff

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You were tagging along with Nick, Matt and Chris with their trip to Texas to collab with Sam and Colby at the Driskill hotel. You've watched Sam and Colby for years now so your brothers just had to bring you along.

When you arrived and got the introductions out of the way, the guys started to film. You looked around taking in the place.

"What's up guys, today we have some special guests, you've been requesting they join for a video for months!" Colby began.

"It's the Sturniolo triplets and their sister, Y/n!" Sam cheered.

The guys cheered and clapped as you giggled. Sam and Colby started asking different questions and how much you all believed.

"I'd say nine." You answered.

"I'm an eight." Matt said.

"Ten, even though nothing has happened to me for it to be a ten." Nick said.

"I'd say seven." Chris said.

The guys nodded as you all started to explore with the guides for a while, taking in the whole hotel and listening to their stories and experiences. It took a few hours and you laughed at the many jokes the guys made. Nick, Matt and Chris kept an eye on you at all times, making sure you were okay.

"Now it's investigation time!" Colby cheered once you went through the tour and the guides left you.

"First off, let's go talk to Samantha." Sam said.

You followed the guys to the old painting of the young girl. You looked at it seeing it was turning green and remembered the guide said it was the only one turning green out of the many paintings in the whole hotel.

"Now we're all going to offer a piece of candy to Samantha, but one of us is going to say Ruth." Colby instructed.

It was chosen that Matt would call on Ruth whilst the rest of you called on Samantha. You all placed the candy in front of the painting and then went to the stairs where Samantha died.

"You feeling okay, bub?" Chris asked you quietly.

"Yeah, just taking it all in." You answered.

He nodded, wrapping an arm around your shoulder as Sam set up the flashlights on the stairs. You then saw something out of the corner of your eye, making you look back, which caught your brothers' attention.

"What?" They all called at the same time, shocking Sam and Colby.

"I...I swear I saw something go by." You answered.

"Can we just talk about how you all said that at the exact same time!" Colby exclaimed, making you all laugh.

"What did you see?" Matt asked.

"It was a shadow....but it didn't look tall." You replied.

"Samantha." Sam said.

Just then, one of the flashlights went off, making you all gasp. Chris who was still next to you, pulled you closer to his side. You watched as the guys asked various questions, getting a few answers. You then placed your hands in the pockets of your sweats and gasped.

"Oh my fucking God." You called out.

"What!" Nick shouted.

"I have a piece of candy in my pocket." You responded, holding some of the candy that Sam had in his backpack.

"You only took one piece and offered it to Samantha." Chris mentioned, making you nod.

"Yeah you saw me and it's on camera. How did this get here?" You asked.

"Let's go check and see how many pieces are left at the painting." Sam suggested.

You all nodded and headed back to the painting. You saw there was five pieces, where there should have been six.

"The piece I left is gone." You said.

"That's fucking crazy." Nick said.

You all took a short break, trying to gather some thoughts, before heading to the Maximillian room. The one Empress Carlota was supposed to be in. As soon as you walked in, you started getting a headache and felt dizzy. Nick, who was behind you, noticed you grab your head.

"Hey kid, you okay?" He asked, placing a hand on your shoulder.

"I just started feeling really dizzy and got a headache." You answered.

"First Samantha and now here, you think it's Carlota?" Matt asked.

"You seem to be drawing them in." Sam mentioned.

You took a deep breath and watched them set some equipment up. You then had a crazy idea after seeing them set the EMF rope up.

"What if I do the estes method in here?" You suggested.

"No!" Nick, Matt and Chris all shouted at the same time.

"You said you felt dizzy, we're not having our sixteen year old sister get attached to a spirit!" Nick added.

"We don't want to cause any family drama, but it could be a good idea. You guys can try it later in room 525, but Y/n might get something more since she's a girl." Colby replied.

After a bit of convincing, you sat on the floor in the middle of the EMF rope, blindfolded and with the headphones on. You sat for a few minutes with nothing.

"I don't know why I feel so nervous." Chris said, laughing to try and cover his fear.

"She's your sister, it seems more scary when it's someone you love." Sam responded.

Suddenly, you started saying some stuff. It was a few random words at first, the guys tried to piece together, but then you said something that scared them.

"Her."

"Her? As in Y/n?" Colby asked.

"Yes."

"What about her?" Nick asked.

"Want."

"You can't have our sister." Chris said.

"Are we talking with Carlota?" Sam questioned.

"Threat."

"Is Y/n a threat?" Matt asked.

You didn't say anything for a minute, giving the guys a chance to think and ask some more questions. But they then noticed you weren't responding and your breathing started picking up.

"Get her out!" Matt shouted.

Colby rushed over and tapped your shoulder gently, helping you remove the headphones. You threw the blindfold off and looked at the guys, your breathing still faster than normal and tears in your eyes.

"Hey, hey your okay. We're here." Nick said, hugging you tightly.

Sam placed the camera down, knowing you needed to stop for a bit. Matt rubbed your back as you clung to Nick, Chris standing besides him, all their faces showed worry. None of them said anything as you calmed down.

When you had calmed down, your breathing back to normal, you all went and sat in the lobby, feeling safer in that area.

"Can you remember anything you said?" Matt asked you.

"A few words like her and want, but it was like someone was squeezing my head tightly. It was static and my body started feeling light till Colby touched my shoulder." You answered.

"Did....Did you get it on camera?" You then asked.

"A bit, but we can cut it out." Sam answered.

"If that's okay." You replied, making him nod.

"Of course, whatever makes you feel more comfortable." Colby replied.

You gave them a small smile and knew that Nick, Matt and Chris would be watching you like a hawk for the rest of the investigation.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Taglist

@mattsfavbigtitties @lgbtq-girl @onelesslonelygirlbieber6 @riowritesitall

[canthelpit0]

Silent

Pairing: Matt x reader

Wordcount: 1.8k +

Summary: you’ve always quietly watched the triplets, silently wishing you could be a part of a group like them. Until you and Matt talk for the first time…

Warnings: selective mutism, anxiety, crying, angst, praise, no use of y/n, no oc

(Disclaimer: I’m not mute in any way. This was a request from an anon that I accidentally deleted. Hope you like it ! Requests are open)

I developed selective mutism pretty early on. My mom says that I didn’t talk even back in kindergarten.

But it’s been years now.

I can talk, and I can’t shut the fuck up for the life of me. I talk a lot, even have full conversations with myself.

Just not at school, or around new people. God, especially not in school.

It’s not like I want to be the ‘ weird’ mute kid. I would love to talk and make friends, I just physically can’t open my mouth and talk.

It even took months for me to utter simple words to my therapist, tho by this point I’ve known her for years and I’m pretty comfortable.

There are these triplets in my grade. We’ve always gone to the same school, but I don’t think they ever noticed me.

Well the first time I noticed them was in first grade, because there were three of them. Of corse my six year old self didn’t understand the concept of multiples back then, and I really wanted to ask, and talk to them. I really thought they were cool.

The first time I interacted with any of them tho was when I was in fourth grade and Nick had asked to use my dark green pencil since he only had light green and needed both dark and light.

Back in fourth grade I wasn’t just selectively mute, but also really shy. So I’d just looked down and stared at the desk giving him a small nod.

In freshmen year I shared a class with Nick again, he asked me for a pen, wich I gave to him.

Despite not having talked to him once in my entire life, he remembered my name. Wich isn’t too shocking since we’ve always been around each other, I was just kinda in the shadows.

He actually gave me that pen back. Most other people would’ve forgotten and just taken it, but Nick didn’t and I appreciated that.

I only ever interacted with Nick those two times. despite sharing a few classes with both Chris and Matt over the years, I’ve probably never even held eye contact with either of them.

I’ve been watching everyone.

Bullying isn’t really a thing. Sure there were some hurtful comments by jocks here and there but it really wasn’t as bad as in the movies.

Besides I think most people forget i even exist so they don’t even bother bullying me.

I’ve had my eye on Matt for a while. Not in a weird way. But Matt seems to pretty obviously have anxiety too. I don’t know if he’s open about it, I’m not in his friend circle.

But every time I’m feeling overwhelmed and we’re in the same room, I unconsciously glance at him to see if he feels the same or if I’m just going crazy.

Chris seems to be the loudest and most extroverted one. And while yes, Nick seems pretty extroverted too, Chris seems more… random? Bold?

I sulk in the back of the class my lips pulled into a tight line as I try to get myself together.

There is literally no reason for me to be feeling like this. Honestly no one has tried to talk to me today, nothing happened, I just feel so overwhelmed.

I raise my hand just slightly. I make eye contact with the teacher. Mrs. Evans. I literally love her, she’s so kind.

Her son is apparently mute too.

When I was diagnosed with selective mutism they thought it’d be a great idea to make me learn sign language just in case, and that’s just what I did.

Since Mrs. Evans son is mute, her son, as well as her and her husband also learned sign language.

So whenever I needed something I could sign to her. Not that I wouldn’t be too embarrassed too.

Our eyes lock. Everyone was working on some paper I should also be doing, but I’m too busy hyperventilating.

I let my hand drop on my desk and glance at the door quietly asking if I can go to the nurses office since I was too tired and ashamed to sign it to her.

She gives me a pitying smile but nods. I hate pity, but then again that’s better than getting told im faking.

I look around the class of students. I get up, as quiet as I can. I pack up my little stuff and quietly walk to the front of the class. I nod in appreciation and walk outside.

I stare at the ground while I walk down the hallway. I sigh.

I feel my eyes start to water and I bite the inside of my cheek.

Honestly I should probably go to the nurses office to get checked out, just so I can leave. But I don’t think I can handle communicating with another human.

I feel like I’m about to break down. I continue to walk down the hallway clutching the straps of my bag harshly.

I consider if driving home even is a good idea seeing as I’m about to have a mental breakdown. Or-

Suddenly I bump into someone.

I close my eyes trying not to cry right then. I don’t know who I bumped into but I want to apologize, but I know that I can’t, and since I don’t know who I bumped into I don’t know if it’s someone who’ll be mean about it or-

I’m taken off guard by a gentle brush to my upper arm.

“You’re good, it’s okay” I hear a soft voice say. I can feel my lip quivering, I feel like if I open my eyes the tears brimming at my waterline will actually fall.

“can you open your eyes?” It sounds more like a question, and that voice sounds painfully familiar but I can’t quite place it.

I want to tell him that I can’t, that I’ll cry if I do and I’ll feel even more embarrassed. But my curiosity takes over me.

So I slightly blink open my eyes. I don’t open my eyes fully, just enough to see the person through my tears.

It’s Matt, looking down at me all concerned.

I blink my eyes open. at the sight I watch his expression relax just slightly.

He himself looks overwhelmed, and honestly I don’t know if it’s because of how I’m acting, or if he had a shitty day himself.

“You okay?” He sighs slightly. I watch as he licks his lips and swallows thickly.

I take in another deep breath trying to calm down. I nod just slightly, but while I do the tears in my eyes finally spill.

I feel my hot tears run down my face. Matt’s eyes immediately widen and his mouth opens slightly like he thinks it’s his fault.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, no please don’t cry.” He holds up his hands in front of my face as if he wanted to wipe my tears away but was holding himself back because he didn’t know my boundaries.

He looked miserable, like he was about to cry himself. And I just know that something this wouldn’t have him emotional like this on a normal day. At least I don’t think it would. But he seemed to be overwhelmed as well.

I scrunch my nose slightly sniffling in response. I glance back up at him and the sorrow in his eyes makes me want to sink into myself. I breathe out shakily.

Before I know it I’m bringing my hands up to my face and covering it. I tilt my head forward trying to stop crying, because crying in the school halls is just pathetic.

“I’m sorry. Fuck- can I touch you?” I hear his frantic voice. I appreciate that he asked first. I want a hug, but then again I don’t know Matt. But he just seems so genuine.

I overthink not responding to his question. My thoughts spiral at the sound of the sweet nothings and apologies leaving his mouth, only being back round noise.

Matt seems to notice that I’m starting to spiral. I feel his hand tenderly touch my wrist. I flinch slightly, and as soon as I do I feel him retract his hand.

Everybody deals with anxiety differently, some people like to be physically grounded others liked to be comforted some other way and I just knew that Matt was trying to figure out what to do without overstepping.

I’d tell him that it’s okay, or that he can hug me, but I literally can’t speak and I feel too embarrassed to let him see my teary face.

“I’m sorry, I’m-“ I hear Matt let out a breath. I know an anxiety breath when I hear one, he is panicking.

I decide to bite the bullet, what’s the worst that can happen. I look up slightly and peak through my fingers.

His hands are up and frozen. He looks almost frantic, Matt looks like the only way he knows how to ground me is by hugging me or something, but he seems unsure if that’s okay.

Despite myself I let out a little nod. Matt lets out another breath but this time he actually touches me, and I don’t flinch.

He holds my wrist and gently pulls my hands off of my face.

I let out a shaky sigh. I can’t help it when I let my head fall forward.

“It’s okay.” He says sweetly under his breath. He puts his hand under my chin as he picks my face up. Our eyes lock. I see the way Matt is also crying, tears running down his face too and I relax just a little.

He never seemed like the type to make fun of someone for crying, but especially not now.

“You wanna go to my car?” He says softly, not in a way where he is forcing me to do anything, but rather offering.

And honestly as upset as i am I have to weigh my options. Would I rather cry in the school hallways or in Matt’s car?

The best option would be to go to the bathroom, but Matt wouldn’t be able to come with, and honestly I would feel too bad leaving him alone at this point.

So I nod.

I feel Matt’s arm go around my shoulders as he hugs me for a moment. He turns me, and starts walking in a way where his arm is still around my shoulder keeping me close to him.

We walk out to the parking lot. I watch as Matt unlocks the car and opens the door for me to enter.

And by this point, if I go out this way so be it…

Before i can even register Matt is also getting into the backseat next to me.

We just look at each other for a moment. He breathes out another anxiety sigh.

“You want a hug?” And with that I don’t really know if he’s asking for me, or to comfort himself. But regardless I nod.

I feel his arms come around me and I sink into the feeling of his hug.

I’m uncertain if by tomorrow he’ll act like this all never happened, or if he’ll try to get to know me, because I’ve been wanting to know him for a while and I would more then gladly let him.

Masterlist

A/n: I know this is really short and I’ve been uploading a lot of angst recently. But I’ve been feeling sad, and every time I do write smut it’s for Kinktober. Soon you’ll get smut tho. Also this ended up a lot like crybaby. <3

‼️please don’t copy my work/idea‼️

Taglist: @muwapsturniolo , @sturnad , @iluvm4ttsturni0l0 , @evie-sturns , @me09love , @fratbrochrisgf , @spideylovin , @chrissgirlsstuff , @stunza , @whicked-hazlatwhore , @sturniooolos , @ecliphttlunar , @orangeypepsi , @klaus223492 , @char112244 , @sst7niolo , @slut4chriss , @mattsturniololoverr , @th3-3d3n-g4rd3n , @st7rnioioss , @t1llysblogs , @nonat-111 , @blahbel668 , @rockstarchr1s , @sturnsintrouble , @nayveetbhh , @tillies33ssss , @sturncakez , @strnilo , @somegirlfromasgard , @mattslovelygf , @sturnsmaeve , @sturnstvr , @lucianastrun , @jnkvivi , @jamiesturniolo , @chr1sgirl4life

[admirationandromantics]

Going overboard, Epilogue

(He looks so fine, I can't handle it. Can handle him though, just like you're about to do). Anyways, this is the final end of this story. This has been such a great experience, and I've loved writing it. I know many are waiting for the next one (which will be with Chris), but please give me some time to get started on that. Right now, I have a bunch of requests to take care of, which I will also be doing while posting the next story.

Again, thank you all for the encouragement and support throughout this, and don't worry. Josh is NOT gone, you can request as much as you want. Anyways, as always, my blog is 18+ and so is this post (hint hint) so just enjoy! <3

Luckily, I got to know that both Matt and Jessica survived. Mike was so happy when they told us. Jess looked like a wreak though, I’ve never seen her like that, physically or mentally. She told us that she didn’t think she’d survive if it weren’t for Matt. I’ve never seen gratitude like what I saw on Mike’s face that day. He went straight for Matt, pulling him into a hug, leaving him stunned. 

The police were quick to separate all of us, getting each one’s story. I told the truth, everything there was to say, but I don’t think they believed me. It hurt telling them about Josh. I feared that he’d serve time, that he would stay behind bars for a long time. They decided that there would be no trial, considering his mental state. I heard his laughter from the other room, crying by myself as I wondered what he would remember, and if the traumas we went through would be the drop that spilled the glass. They decided he was a danger to others and himself, and it didn’t take long to get him to a clinic and try some new medication. Again, after another traumatic trip to that damn mountain, I didn’t keep in touch with him. They didn’t let him use his phone, and the only people allowed to see him were his parents. After four months, they let Chris visit, but it had been a long time since I saw them, so I don’t think that letting me visit was even an option. 

The friend group split. I don’t know what happened with Emily and Matt, last I heard, they were still together, but that was a while ago. Jess and Mike broke up after a while. I heard it was bad, and Jessica was the one who made the cut. Sam still talked to him, so I got some info here and there, but he is not the sort of man I really wish to be in contact with. 

I still talk to Sam, and we continue our daily coffees, only now, we talk about the last events that happened on that cursed place. She seems like she’s falling down some rabbit hole about mythological creatures and folklore. I’ve told her that we should forget everything, that maybe talking to a therapist could be good for her. She doesn’t listen, and I’m just trying to keep her present, afraid that she’ll end up as Josh. Isolated, and supervised continuously. 

I’m often invited over for gaming nights with Chris and Ashley. The games vary, but it doesn’t always feel as welcoming as thought. I often feel like an intruder, like they would feel bad by hanging out together without me. I tried to talk to Ashley about it, but she assured me that they love me, and us being together is a good way to deal with everything. I still feel like a third wheel, sitting in the corner while they have flirty interactions or Chris steals a kiss. Still, they both feel bad for me, that much I’m sure of. One of the good things that come out of it is that Chris tells me about his visits. In the start, Josh had been confused and scared, pleading with him to get him out of there. Now, six months later, he was better, the medicine finally working and pieces falling back into place. He’s bored out of his mind, joking that if they didn’t give him at least a console, he would kill himself. Chris laughed when he said that, but my breath hitched and I suddenly felt unsure. Ashley noticed, walking over to me and telling me that Josh joking like this just meant that he felt better. They’d gotten used to my cries. I was never this bad before, but even though I didn’t have a reason, it still came out. Every day, several times. I had to lock myself in the bathroom or my bedroom to relieve myself. 

***

I cut the tomato in thin slices, arranging them in fine lines on the buttered toast. A knock is heard on the door. “Just walk in Sam, it’s open” I shout, knowing when she usually comes over on her morning run. I hear the door open, footsteps out of the hallway. I grab the salt, carefully shaking it over the tomato to not get too much. Two hands make their way around my waist, pulling me into a tight body. I stop breathing as I know that this is not Sam, this is a man’s body. I look down, hands looking awfully familiar. 

“Hey” he whispers against my ear, and I feel tears coating my eyes. I turn around, looking at a smiling Josh. 

“Hey” I answer, not able to hide the surprise in my voice. My hands travel behind his neck, locking him in place. His dark circles aren’t as bad anymore, and he does look quite healthy. I still don’t know what to say, shocked by his sudden presence. He smirks, tilting his head and looking at me with sceptical eyes. 

“Well, isn’t this a first time for you not knowing what to say”

“I-I”

“We’re getting there…”

“Hey, you bombarded me wi-” I’m interrupted by a kiss, his head moving in sync with mine, hunger, lust and eight months without contact pooling out as a stress-relief. He grabs me harder, taking hold of my thighs and lifting me up on the counter. God, I’ve missed him. My legs cross behind him, pulling him deeper into me. His lips are soft and warm, connecting with mine as I open my mouth a bit, letting him in deeper. I whine, feeling the tears fall from the corners of my eyes. His hands move to cup my face, thumbs brushing away the wetness. 

“We should probably talk” I say between sobs. 

“That’s why I came over” he answers, pulling away a bit. I waste no time, taking his arm and forcing him back, his lips on mine while I sob. His sisters, the prank, the wendigos, everything poured into me slowly coming out. 

“Sorry” I whisper. “You’ve just come out, this isn’t what you need right now” I squeak, trying to compose myself. 

“Hey, it’s okay. I’m here, and I’m not leaving again”

This makes me break down even harder, being reminded that every time we rekindle, something gets in the way. He lays my head on his flannel-coated shoulder, letting me cry till I can’t breathe anymore. He holds me up, making sure that I don’t fall off the counter while leaving sweet small kisses on my forehead. When the air is finally quiet, he pulls away, thumbs rubbing my cheeks. I feel the mascara being smudged, though that’s more my fault than his. 

“God, I’d already gotten ready today, and now I guess I have to do it again” I laugh, trying to look a little presentable. 

“You’re beautiful” he whispers, awe in his eyes. I stop the tears and kiss him yet again. 

After a while, we make our way to the sofa, determined to talk about this now, to get it over with. I walk to the bathroom to freshen up. 

“Are you sure you need that? What if you start crying again?” he shouts from the living room. 

“Haha, I’ve gotten everything out now” I laugh back. 

“You sure? It would be awfully inconvenient for you to spend half of the time in the bathroom… alone…” 

“Almost done Josh!”

I walk back out, and he’s still spread out on the sofa. I sit down on top of him, holding his shoulders as I lean down to kiss him. His hands wander, gripping my thighs and ass. 

“You said we should talk?” I tease, knowing he’s getting riled up. 

“No, no, no, no. Fuck talking, let’s do this instead” he urges, gripping me harder and pressing me down on him. I want him so bad, but we do indeed have to talk. 

“We have to” I whisper. 

“I know”

The hours go by as we talk about the incident. I get especially emotional when we talk about the prank, how he tricked me, several times. He wasn’t in his right mindset, but he would do everything in his power to get me to trust him again. He had talked to the others, but the other part of the group decided not to keep in contact. It was a toxic friend group anyway, I comment. He talked about his time in the facility, how it was scary in the beginning, cause he didn’t know what was real and what wasn’t. Luckily, Chris had told him about the wendigos, but he still had to pretend they didn’t exist and they were a figment of his imagination when they did his mental evaluation. He just wanted to put everything behind him, and move forward. After a while, the mood lightens, as we stop talking about the deep stuff. 

“You hit me!” he laughs, hitting me in the arm. 

“Well, I thought you were a fucking Psycho!” I defend myself. 

“That wasn’t the only time!”

“The way you were talking? You asked for it!” 

“You know, I should really come up with a revenge plan for you”

“Let’s not forget about what you did”

“Nah, that doesn’t count, I was insane”

“You can’t play the mentally ill-card on this”

“Yes I can”

I hit him again, and he grabs my arms, lifting them behind him, causing me to fall flat down on his stomach. 

“I think, maybe we’ll go to the bedroom, you get undressed, and I can start leaving some marks on you” he whispers, fingers still entwined with mine. 

“Really, what kind of marks are we talking about?” I skeptically ask, looking up at him. 

“Maybe a bit similar to the ones you left on me, just without the wood” 

“You’re sadistic”

“Some things can’t be cured”

I reach up to him, straddling his lap and kissing him. 

“Got something else planned?”

“Eight months gave me time to think”

“And what are your thoughts?”

“Something about you, tied up, blindfolded, begging me to touch you…” he starts, and I feel myself getting wetter. His breathing is hot, and he can’t stop staring at my lips. I smile, slowly grinding on him. Making him let out a groan. “Fuck, and then I’ll teach you a lesson” he says, hands moving to my thighs to help the movements. I bite my lip, eager to get into it, to let him get into me. 

“Fucking hell, you need to stop that” he whines. 

“You’re the one leading me” I tease, caressing his arms, making him aware of his grip on my thighs. I lean forward, kissing his neck, small pecks all over. He makes a small whimpering sound when I kiss him right below his ear, so I bite down. He jolts, giving out a loud moan. I kiss the pain away, lightly sucking. His hands wander under my shirt, grabbing my waist. In response, I grace his neck with my nails, feeling him shiver under my touch. 

He takes out his hands, placing them under my thighs. I pull away, wondering what he’s doing. 

“Jos- woah!” I yelp as he lifts me over his shoulder, holding onto my legs so I don’t fall down behind him. 

“Josh! What the hell are you doing?” I yell. He stands up, making the ground so far away that I don’t dare to scramble. He smacks my butt, making me gasp while walking over to the bedroom. I would be lying if I said that I didn’t like it. 

“You know, you’re gonna pay” he says, something sinister in his voice. 

“Oh, really?” I tease, earning myself another smack. 

“Don’t try to be a smartass, that’ll not get you anywhere” he says, caressing my legs, one of his hands moving up between my thighs. 

“Josh” I say, grabbing hold of his waist from upside down. 

“What can I do for you?”

“You can put me down”

“I thought you were into the whole Spiderman-thing” he asks, opening the bedroom door. 

“Well, that’s when we’re face to face” 

“I guess I’ll have you upside down some other time then” he says, bowing down, making me slam into the bed. I shriek, surprised by the action. He doesn’t waste time, leaning over me, capturing my lips in his. It starts hungry, but eventually finds a rhythm filled with passion and regret. I open up, letting him inside. Our breaths are heaving in sync, and I grab both sides of his face, eating him up. 

“Eager are we?” he teases, but I have no more room for jokes. 

“Eight months Josh…”

“Yeah, I know”

We continue the assault on each other, chests heaving and bodies grinding. With every passing second, my body grows hotter and wetter. I grab hold of the hem of his shirt, dragging it off him. I’m mesmerized. 

“Have you been working out?” 

“Wasn’t much to do there” 

“Fuck” I mumble as I feel him up, memorizing his lines. He eagerly drags my shirt off, shocked by the fact that I’m not wearing a bra. 

“And you were saving this sight only for me?” 

“Only you” I smile, loosening his belt. He grabs both my hands, holding them over my head. 

“Let’s not get right to the main course” he purrs in my ear. 

“Oh, please, I’ve waited long enough”

“Patience” he whispers, voice vibrating hot against my skin. He leaves a trail of kisses, starting on my lips, moving slowly down my neck. With his free hand, he grabs my breast, squeezing and fickling with my nipple. I moan from his touch, legs automatically pressing against each other, longing for some type of friction. My core aches for him, being turned on for so long that I feel like a primal animal. He notices, and places his knee in between, making me grind down on him. 

“You’re too eager”

“Fucking hell Washington, if you don’t do anything in the nex-”

“Oh my, of course. Whatever you say m’lady” he smiles, entertained by my longing for him. He strokes his fingers over my wetness, noticing that I’m drenched through. I ache for him, him and his touch. I have for eight fucking months. 

“God, you have been waiting for this” he calmly exclaims, hand unbuttoning my pants and sliding under. He goes into my panties, coming in contact with my folds immediately. I whine, feeling his faint touch. His thumb starts rubbing circles around my clit, and the longing pleasure I’ve been waiting for seeps through my body. I let out loud moans which are drowned by his kisses. 

“You’re doing so good for me” he whispers, inserting one of his fingers. He pushes in and out, continuing to put pressure on my clit. The knot in my stomach tenses abnormally quick, and I throw my head back as he starts kissing my collar. He chuckles against my skin, noticing how down bad I am for him. He doesn’t stop, working his fingers and toying with my breasts until I come all over him. 

“Good, good” he whispers as I breathe heavily. He makes his way down, taking hold of my pants and dragging them completely off. Before he goes down again, he takes off his own, leaving him in only his boxers. I see his hardness through the fabric, the size of it drenching my already soaked underwear. He lies on top of me, hand caressing my stomach and moving to my waist. He takes hold, spinning me around on my stomach. I give a yelp, but he quickly puts a bit of his weight on top, caging me under him, unable to move. 

“Don’t think you’re getting away that easy” he whispers as his hand moves down to my panties, dragging them off. 

“Fuck, Josh please” I plead, having been ready for him for a long time. I immediately hear a loud smack, before feeling stinging pain on my ass cheek. I cry out, and he moves his hand to rub the painful area. 

“Tell me exactly what you want” he purrs in my ear, hand not moving. 

“I want you Josh” I whine, feeling tears in the corners of my eyes. A loud smacking noise fills the room again, but this time I moan out his name. He smirks, hand rubbing soft circles, numbing the pain. 

“You need to go into more detail than that” 

My mind is fogged, the instincts being mere sexual as everything he does and says turns me on more. 

“You’re practically dripping, like getting manhandled that bad?” he comments, fingers gracing my warmth and making me give out a choked cry. 

“Just tell me what you want and I’ll get you right off” he coys, smirking as he kisses my neck. I try to steady my voice, but it still comes out in the most erotically desperate sounds ever made.

“Please Josh, I want you inside me, now, right now” 

“Oh really?”

“Yes please, please” 

“I love it when you beg for me” he whispers as he takes off his underwear. Finally. He takes hold of me, turning me back on my back so we’re facing each other. 

“I wanna see you” he says, leaning down and kissing me. His cock brushes up against my folds, coating itself and pressing. I gasp as he goes inside me, painfully slow. He grunts as he gets all the way in, grabbing my thigh hard, definitely leaving a mark. 

“God you’re beautiful” he whispers, hand coming to my face, thumb swiping away a tear. He leans even further down, making sure our chests are pressing up against each other, and my arms move under his, and hold onto his back. 

“Josh, I’ve missed you so much” I stammer, the ecstasy of everything blurring my mind and messing with my senses. All I feel is his eyes staring, his hot breath, and immense pleasure. He starts moving against me, pelvis grinding on my clit, with no need for extra factors. I take him in, soaking and moaning, wishing that we didn’t lose two years of this. His breaths quicken, moans passing through his lips. I clench around him as I come again, and he rides the orgasm out with me, capturing my lips once again in a sloppy and panting kiss. 

“I love you” he whispers, still moving and breathing heavily. My heart flutters as he says it, my legs pressing him deeper into me. 

“I love you too” I say back between gasps, taking hold of his neck and pulling him to my lips. He goes faster, and I feel the slight overstimulation as he continues, making me whine. He gets me to the edge again, using his hand to fondle my breasts and sucking my neck. 

“Fuck, I’m gonna-” he pants. 

“Yes, please do!” I urge, coming another time around his cock, tightening. This throws him over, and he buries himself deep inside as he comes as well. He collapses on top of me, the sudden weight knocking my breath out. It quickly comes back, and I fold my arms around him, hugging and kissing his hairline. 

“Don’t leave” I force out, breathless and weak. 

“Never” he answers, just as exhausted.

[inawickedlittletown]

Call Him - 8x09 coda

Tommy gets a call from Eddie. I think I would fit this as a call Eddie makes during his going away dinner...he sneaks away to the bathroom or something.

-

Tommy hadn’t heard from Eddie in weeks. Actually, the last contact he’d had with anyone over at the 118 was Chim. A simple text that just read: I hope you’re doing okay. Tommy knew it was a prompt to get Tommy to reach out and text something back or call, but Chim was Buck’s brother-in-law and the prospect of talking about any of it had made Tommy want to scream. So, he never responded. So, he didn’t expect to hear from any of them, least of all Eddie. 

Tommy could let it go to voicemail. Tommy could ignore that the call happened at all. He knew he couldn’t. 

Eddie wouldn’t call without reason. That…that made him answer, bringing the phone to his ear with a shaky hand. 

“Hey,” Eddie said. He didn’t sound upset or worried or panicked. 

“Hey, Eddie,” Tommy responded. Wary. “Can I help you with anything?” 

Eddie didn’t say anything immediately. “I’m moving to Texas,” Eddie said. 

Tommy had definitely not expected that. His first thought was Evan. How was Evan taking that? He had to be freaking out? In the six months they’d dated one thing that had become very clear was the co-dependency between Eddie and Evan. Tommy had been intimidated by it for about five minutes, but they had both just welcomed him in. 

“You’re moving to Texas,” Tommy repeated. 

“I can’t just keep waiting for Chris to come back on his own, man,” Eddie said. “He has friends there, he’s settled into a life there. I can’t force him to come back, but I can go to him. I can be there with him.” 

What would Tommy have done to have a father like Eddie. He really did hope that Chris would realize that despite his mistakes, Eddie was still a great father and that he loved Chris more than anything. 

“That sounds like the right move,” Tommy said. “So, did you need something from me?” 

“Ah. Well, Buck isn’t taking it well and he’ll need someone to look after him. I thought maybe that someone could be you.” 

“Eddie, I don’t—”

Eddie cut him off. “Tommy, I was around you guys a lot. More than I probably should have been because I’ve seen some things…anyway, that is not the point. The point is, he was happier when he was with you than when he dated anyone else and I think you were too.” 

How much did Eddie know about how they broke up? Did he know that Tommy had made a stupid unthought choice in the moment in some effort to protect himself? That he’d regretted that choice almost as soon as he left Evan’s apartment. How he’d broken his own heart and still hadn’t managed to put it back together. 

“When are you leaving?” He asked instead. 

“A few weeks,” Eddie said. “Already started packing. Look, he won’t want me saying so, but he’s not over you. He’s gotten better at hiding it, but he’s still baking and oh god, I didn’t even think about my gas bill. That’s…anyway, my point is that he would be happy to hear from you. Anyway, I gotta go.” 

Eddie didn’t even let him say goodbye. Tommy was a little confused about the last of what Eddie said, except for the part where he mentioned that Evan wasn’t over him. Eddie would certainly be the one to know that for sure. Tommy held his phone and his fingers went to his messages. Evan’s thread was still there. The number of times he’d gone back and read through it before composing a text he never sent would be embarrassing to admit to anyone but maybe Evan himself. 

Maybe Eddie’s call was the excuse he needed. A reason for him to reach out. A reason to talk to Evan again. To fix things, even. 

Tommy took a few deep breaths to steady himself. 

He had Evan’s contact up and he hit call. 

[buddierecs]

aly's recent reads - pt. 2

here is pt 2 of my recent reads which i have absolutely loved so i hope you also enjoy them :) these fics are mixed rated, so please check the ratings and tags!

i'll love you for the rest of my life by: justhockey "sometimes it still baffles buck how moments like these are exactly as they’ve always been. they could have been sitting here laughing like this six months, or a year, or even five years ago, and it would have looked exactly the same. the way they fit together, like one soul in two bodies, feels like something of a miracle. and buck knows a little something about miracles, because one day - a little less than a year ago - eddie had taken buck’s hands in his and said I love you. Nothing has ever felt closer to magic than that." word count: 3.3k rating: general audience important tags: established relationship, domestic fluff, family feels, sibling love, soft!buddie, marriage proposal when everything's on fire by: beartowns (i just have binged read their fics! love them) "eddie and chris move in with buck after a fire. buck breaks up with his boyfriend, buys a house with eddie, and realizes he's in love. in precisely that order." word count: 15k rating: teen and up important tags: roommates, emotional infidelity, friends to lovers, emotional hurt/comfort, pining, love confessions are we... dating? by: eightpackdiaz "what do you do when your best friend keeps taking you on dates without calling them dates? talk to him, right? right?" word count: 11k rating: teen and up important tags: idiots in love, didn't know they were dating, feelings realisation, first dates, minor buck/tommy, tommy kinard bashing blood runs thicker than water by: circuslife "eddie's sisters come to visit. "to see the sights," they say. ("proof of life," eddie thinks)." word count: 11k rating: teen and up important tags: diaz sisters, gay!eddie diaz, season 7, family dynamics, coming out, therapy, domestic fluff, love confessions be good to me, it isn't a game by: 118mgzn "buck and eddie desperately try to get the other to crack and reveal their relationship first, and they have no clue they’re both playing the same game." word count: 7k rating: mature important tags: secret relationship, miscommunication, crack, fluff, love confessions, jealous!eddie diaz, possessive!eddie diaz i'm holding on (barely) by: cranberrymoons "eddie and buck take christopher home to california; helena and ramon decide to follow" word count: 12k rating: mature important tags: parenthood, complicated relationship, therapy, coming out, family dynamics, repression, buckley-diaz family, character study, healing stay here honey (i don't wanna share) by: prettybegins "amidst his son leaving for texas, a sexuality crisis in his 30s, and the possibility of losing his best friend, eddie can’t seem to catch a break." word count: 14k rating: mature important tags: idiots in love, miscommunication, meddling, gay!eddie diaz, feeling realisation, jealous!eddie diaz, love confessions all these broken parts by: woodchoc_magnum "post-season 7, where eddie is struggling with depression, trying to put his life back together, and hopelessly in love with his best friend." word count: 56k rating: mature important tags: TW: depression, anxiety, suicidal thoughts, angst, roommates, pining!eddie diaz, oblivious!evan buckley, evan buckley take care of eddie diaz, minor buck/tommy, getting together, eventual smut

sweet talk by: daisies_and_briars "eddie asks to crash at the loft while christopher is gone, struggling to be on his own. only problem? there's only one bed, and no couch." word count: 6.5k rating: teen and up important tags: there was only one bed, healing, post season 7 hard of hearing buck (series) by: timeshareindestin "little au where buck gets hearing aids and eddie is kind of in love with him about it" word count: 31k rating: teen and up important tags: character study, disability, getting together, coming out, hard of hearing buck, evan buckley has adhd, hurt/comfort burn the straw house down by: rarakiplin "buck gets stuck in time, has a break down and then, relatedly, a break through" word count: 40k rating: mature important tags: time loop au, fake dating, angst with a happy ending, car accidents

[prettybuck]

Can I ask for "I'm just so afraid." For buddietommy if it inspires anything pls and thanks 🫶🏼

Thank you for the prompt! I changed the wording up a bit, but I hope you enjoy!

Read on AO3

send me a buddie/bucktommy/buddietommy prompt

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"You love him."

In the space of a single second, and with three simple words, it feels like Buck's entire world crashes at his feet. The dish he's washing slips from his hands, clattering to the bottom of the sink as his blood runs cold. Gone is the levity that settled over his apartment from the moment Eddie walked through the door with two six packs and a wide grin.

He thought the dinner went well. Jokes were cracked, old stories were retold, and times were reminisced upon. Now, with Eddie out on the balcony talking to Chris on the phone and the weight of Tommy's eyes on him, Buck's mind spins with what could have given him away. There's nothing he did differently, as far as he can remember, but maybe that's the problem.

"Evan, hey."

Tommy is across the room in seconds, the warmth of his hand seeping through Buck's shirt as it settles over his back. He doesn't deserve the touch, the comfort, but he can't bring himself to refuse it either.

"Don't," he manages, bracing his trembling hands on either side of the sink.

"It's okay," Tommy says quietly, rubbing his back.

Buck swallows hard against the lump rising in his throat and the burn of tears in his eyes, but it does nothing to help.

"No, it's not," he says, shaking his head. "It's not."

"Look at me."

Tommy's hand finds his chin, giving him little choice but to turn his head. Those eyes he knows so well by now are filled with understanding that he hasn't earned by any means.

"Do you love me?"

The question catches him off guard, not because he doesn't know the answer but because it's only been a handful of months since their first kiss in this very kitchen. No one is supposed to ask that question, because no one in their right mind falls in love that quickly.

Then again, Buck's never done anything right. Why start now?

"Yes," he says, his voice barely above a whisper because he's already dug his grave and he might as well keep going at it.

But Tommy doesn't look upset by it. The corner of his mouth ticks up just slightly, and there's that sparkle in his eye that appears on rare occasions. Mostly when Buck is rambling on and on about whatever topic has caught his attention.

"And you love him?"

A tear slips down his cheek, and all he can do is nod.

And as if he was waiting for the perfect moment, the balcony door opens at that very moment and Eddie steps back inside with a wide grin on his face. Buck's heart aches at the sight, as he and Tommy both turn their heads to look. Weeks went by without a smile from Eddie, but Chris is opening up again and so is Eddie, in so many ways. And Buck is so proud of him for it, and he's absolutely terrified of stealing away that newfound lightness he sees in his best friend.

"Chris says hi," Eddie says lightly, carefully shutting the door behind him without quite looking at them yet. "He's been going on about this new game, can't wait to play it with–"

He cuts off just as his eyes fall on them, flitting from Buck to Tommy and back, his smile fading.

"What's going on?"

Buck clears his throat, shrugging off Tommy's hand and turning back to the sink.

"Nothing," he says dismissively, wiping the tears from his cheeks before he picks up the dish he dropped.

"Buck," Eddie says at the same time Tommy murmurs, "Evan."

"It's nothing," Buck repeats, scrubbing furiously at the plate.

He has no doubt that there's some kind of silent exchange of looks behind his back, but he tries not to think about it. He can still salvage this night, and maybe even his relationship with Tommy. Eddie doesn't know a thing, so nothing at all has to change. All he has to do is get past it.

It's nothing he hasn't done before.

"Listen to me," Tommy says, leaning against the counter with an unwavering stare fixed on the side of his head. "There's nothing wrong with anything you just said, okay?"

Buck can't help but scoff, placing the plate on his drying rack with more force than necessary and nearly knocking the entire thing off of the counter.

"Can someone clue me in?" Eddie asks, every bit as confused as he is worried.

"No," Buck says forcefully, shooting Tommy a warning look that is answered with nothing more than a raised eyebrow.

He feels cornered, and there's nothing that he wants to do more than flee the scene. But his apartment is entirely too small for that, and he finds himself resenting the open floor plan that Ali talked him into all those years ago.

"You have nothing to be afraid of."

"Yes I do," Buck says, letting out a humorless laugh. "I have everything to be afraid of, so just... forget it, okay? Please?"

Tommy catches his arm before he can reach for another plate, and he's strong enough to resist Buck's effort to pull away. He guides Buck to face him, both hands cupping his cheeks.

"Trust me, baby," he says, warm and soothing. "I wouldn't lie to you. Not about anything but especially about this, okay?"

Buck's eyes flutter closed for just a moment, his faith in Tommy battling with the fear that's sinking deep claws into him.

Then he looks to Eddie.

Eddie, who has spent months finding himself and who came out the other side more settled in his skin than Buck has ever seen him. Eddie, who probably deserves better than Buck could ever give him. Eddie, who he loves so damn much it that sometimes it feels like it might destroy him.

It still could.

"Can I?" Eddie asks warily, gesturing to the distance between them.

Something about it hurts, because Eddie's never asked before. Half-convinced he's already fucked this up, Buck can only bring himself to nod. Slowly, as if approaching a spooked animal, Eddie rounds the kitchen island and stops just short of him and Tommy.

"You can tell me anything, Buck. You know that."

Shaking his head, Buck steps out of Tommy's arms and scrubs his hands over his stinging eyes.

"Not this."

"Yes this," Eddie counters, his voice sounding even closer now.

"I can't," Buck says helplessly, dropping his hands to look between them.

Tommy, who seems so unsurprised and so okay with this in a way Buck can't quite wrap his mind around. He admitted to being in love with another man in the same that he confessed his love to his boyfriend. Anyone else would be running for the hills right now, but Tommy is still there, for reasons beyond his comprehension.

Eddie, who has that familiar look in his eyes like he wants to take Buck in his arms and shake sense into him every bit as much as he wants to hold him close. There's no tension in his shoulders or unease in his gaze. He stares with open worry and at least a dozen questions on the tip of his tongue.

"Talk to me," Eddie says quietly, his arm lifting and his hand settling in that spot on Buck's shoulder.

As if he gravitates there, it's almost always where he lands. Just close enough for his thumb to brush Buck's collarbone in a touch that never fails to soothe him.

"I'm so afraid," Buck says, a hitch in his voice that betrays the depths of the fear he feels.

"Of what?" Eddie asks gently, tipping his head to the side, those warm, dark eyes wide and imploring.

"I'll ruin everything."

"What if you don't?" Tommy speaks up, stepping closer to them both. "What if you get everything you want?"

Buck can only blink, because how can that be possible? It's him they're talking about. He doesn't get to have any sort of happiness that lasts. He never has, not even when he was a kid. He's gotten so used to fucking things up and letting go of what he wants most, that the mere idea of getting to have this is something that never truly occurred to him.

"Stay with us, sweetheart."

He doesn't realize his mind has drifted until Eddie's voice brings him back. Buck's eyes snap to him as he tries to wrap his mind around what he just heard.

"Talk to me," Eddie repeats, nodding his head as if to confirm that yes, Buck heard exactly what he thought he did.

"I love you."

It's the easiest confession he's ever made, and yet the hardest three words he's ever spoken all at once. Eddie's eyes soften even more, if possible, and a smile pulls at his lips. A beautiful, bright, unrestrained smile that Buck will never, ever get tired of seeing. And... he put it there. Didn't he?

"Was that so hard?" Eddie says, a note of teasing in his voice.

Buck all but sobs out a laugh, tipping his head to the ceiling as relief sweeps over him and nearly brings him to his knees.

"Yes," he says honestly.

Eddie sighs, reaching up to brush a soft touch over his cheek.

"I know," he says, his eyes dropping to Buck's lips. "But the world isn't ending, and you didn't ruin anything."

"I didn't?"

Eddie shakes his head, his fingers slipping into Buck's hair as he steps in close.

"Not even close."

The words are all but breathed against his lips, and then Eddie is kissing him. It's tender and featherlight, and it's absolutely perfect. His eyes flutter open as Eddie draws away, just in time to see him glance at Tommy. Buck can't help how his heart drops, and he's almost afraid to look at his boyfriend too. But there's nothing but satisfaction in his gaze when he meets his eyes.

"You were right, Tommy," he says, pitching his voice differently as he sidles up close to them. "However should I thank you, Tommy?"

Eddie huffs out a laugh as Tommy's arm slides around Buck's waist, bringing them all closer than they've ever been.

Buck never wants it to end.

"This is... okay?" he asks warily.

"Evan, what did I say?" Tommy says, his other hand lifting to take hold of his chin in a gentle grip. "There's nothing wrong with wanting both of us, okay? I promise, you aren't the only one feeling it."

Buck's eyes grow slightly wider his eyes darting to Eddie.

"Yeah?"

"Yeah, Buck," Eddie says, a note of amusement in his voice. "What, I haven't been dropping enough hints?"

It only occurs to him then, that Eddie might have been doing exactly that. There's over a dozen instances in the last month alone that he can recall, and it leaves him open-mouthed and shocked.

"And you?" he asks, his attention shifting to Tommy.

"I love you," Tommy says easily, and without a beat of hesitation. "I don't feel the same about Eddie yet and, if I'm reading the room right, he doesn't either. But that being said, I can see myself getting there one day."

Eddie hums his agreement, his eyes dropping to absolutely one hundred percent check Tommy out. Slowly and salaciously, with clear want in his eyes that's returned a thousandfold in Tommy's.

"How did I not see this?" Buck blurts out, unable to help himself.

"Because you were too busy making yourself miserable over all that love you have to give, and you believe that you don't deserve to have exactly what you want," Eddie says, turning back to him. "Not that I can throw stones. A few months ago, I would've been running for the hills before I let myself have this."

Buck nods, because he knows it's true, about both of them.

"You do deserve this, by the way," Tommy says, and it's impossible to know exactly who he's talking to.

Not that it really matters.

"We're really doing this?" Buck asks, almost tempted to pinch himself to make sure he's not dreaming.

"I think so, if that's what you want." Eddie says.

He lets himself think about it, even if his immediate reaction is fuck yes.

"Will you call me 'sweetheart' again?" he asks.

Eddie grins and Tommy laughs, pressing a kiss to the side of his head.

"Anytime you want."

"All the time," Tommy says, his voice serious even as his eyes crinkle happily. "I'm just warning you, he's going to want it all the time."

Buck hums, leaning in to brush a kiss over Tommy's lips as he daringly grabs a handful of his ass, feeling more like himself now that everything is out in the open and he hasn't burned his entire world down.

"Not the only thing I want all the time," he says in a low voice.

"And this is why I need back-up," Tommy says, tapping his cheek lightly. "You're insatiable."

Buck smirks, looking to Eddie who is watching them with poorly hidden hunger in his eyes.

"You sure you're up for it, Diaz?" he asks, suddenly recalling another evening years ago, when he sauntered up to Eddie and challenged him with a hand on his own belt.

In hindsight, this really was a long time coming.

Eddie doesn't say anything, instead grabbing a fistful of his shirt as he draws him into a far less chaste kiss. It's all consuming, stealing away his breath and his bravado all at once, leaving him dizzy and panting for more by the time Eddie pulls away.

"I guess we'll see," he says, his voice cocky in a way that has Buck fighting his own temptation to jump him right there.

"Guess we will," Buck says with a grin, leaning into Tommy's chest as his hand slips into Eddie's.

And for once, he thinks he might just get to have everything he wants.

[epicbuddieficrecs]

Weekly Recap | February 19th-25th 2024

I just realized this weekend that I'm gonna be away on a work conference the day of the premiere AND the next day 🙃 FML 🤦‍♀️

Complete

🔥 the kiln-blaze in my body by lamardeuse/ @lamardeuse (Post-S4 | 17K | Explicit): It's nearly six months before Buck tells anyone.

Leveling Up by lamardeuse/ @lamardeuse (Poker Date spec | 6K | Mature): When he rose to his feet, he found both Eddie and Maddie staring at him. “What?” “You, uh,” Eddie said, his eyes looking sort of glazed over. “You just did measurements by eye. And math.” “In your head,” Maddie said. “Huh,” Buck said. “Yeah, that was – weird.”

We blossom and ask no reason by lamardeuse / @lamardeuse (Canon Divergent, Florist!Eddie | 6K | Mature): “Hen!” Eddie turned at the shout to see a tall blond firefighter built like a brick wall jogging toward them. As he came closer, Eddie amended that to ridiculously pretty brick wall. Holy shit, now Eddie realized why those firefighter calendars were so popular.

🔥 The Definition of Love and All Things Ineffable by ElvenSorceress/ @elvensorceress (Post-S5 | 29K | Teen): Maddie asks him, like she’s been waiting to ask him, “Does Christopher call you ‘Uncle Buck’?” “No,” Buck answers. “Why?” “He called me Aunt Maddie. You’re far closer to him than I am. I thought if I’m his aunt, you’d have to be his uncle. Why wouldn’t you be Uncle Buck?” And Buck doesn’t really have an answer. It’s just. It’s wrong. He’s not Chris’ Uncle Buck. Maybe he should be? Maybe he’s supposed to be? He shrugs and uneasiness settles in his stomach. What more could he ever be to Chris but an uncle? ~ In which Buck processes his breakup, learns his place in his family, has a huge crisis of sexuality, and finds the truth about love beating in his own heart. 

🔥 counteroffer by buckleyseddie/ @buckleyseddie (Season 6, Getting Together | 25K | Teen): Or in order for Buck to make it up to Eddie, Eddie suggests that Buck gives him one hundred kisses. 

That's What Friends Are For by phdmama/ @phdmama (Friends With Benefits to Lovers | 4K | Explicit): Eddie shows up an hour later. He’s clearly gone home and showered, as his hair is damp. He’s wearing sweats and a t-shirt that Buck is pretty sure is his, and he smells of soap and bacon. No, wait, the bacon scent is coming from the bag of takeout containers he’s carrying in one hand. Buck’s eyes narrow at the sight of the object Eddie’s clutching in his other hand. “Tequila?” he asks, raising one eyebrow and then laughs when Eddie just makes a bitchy face back at him. “I mean, I’m in, obviously, but it’s like nine in the morning.”

Like Lovers Do by phdmama/ @phdmama (Accidental Sexting | 5K | Explicit): The thing is, Eddie knows Buck’s body as well as he knows his own, maybe even better. He’s seen Buck changing, averted his eyes from Buck striding naked into the showers in the locker room. Eddie has watched Buck push through a workout, he’s pressed his hands to Buck’s flesh as if he could stop the bleeding through sheer force of will. He’s woken up to Buck sleeping on his couch or stumbling around his kitchen, sweatpants hanging low on his hips as he pulls out the ingredients for pancakes. All this to say, he’s seen Buck’s body a million times, in a million different ways. But not like this. Never like this.

Flickers of Fate by steadfastsaturnsrings/ @steadfastsaturnsrings (S3E15: Eddie Begins, Soulmates AU | 1,6K | Teen): "Did-Did the man who helped me pull out the dead solider survive?" Eddie mumbled, "He-He....said he was right behind me but then disappeared...Is he okay?" "There was no other man, Diaz, You were the last one out of the helicopter. You pulled out that solider all by yourself" The official standing over him responded, looking at Eddie curiously.

Spinning Out by Daisies_and_Briars/ @cal-daisies-and-briars (S7 Spec | 2K | General): The sun always rises in the east and sets in the west. What goes up must always come down. And if Eddie Diaz is in a helicopter with his team, it must fall from the sky.

(put some music on) soft and slow by lecornergirl/ @clusterbuck (Canon Divergent | 6K | Teen): He walks up the stairs to the loft, and finds himself facing the backs of four office chairs. Over by the kitchen counter, Ravi gives a signal, and all four chairs turn around in impressive sync. “Saw you on TV last night,” Eddie says, still grinning. “Something you want to tell us?” OR: buck auditions for the voice. it goes about the way you'd expect.

🔥 Precious & Fragile Things by Daisies_and_Briars/ @cal-daisies-and-briars (Small Miracles AU, Angel Buck | 46K | Teen): Buck is the Fallen Angel of Petty Temptation, who has been tasked with tempting human Eddie Diaz to sin and enjoy life, but just a little. He thinks the job will be easy - get in, get out, go back to Peru to continue messing around with eternity. But when Buck arrives in Los Angeles, he finds Eddie is harder to tempt than expected, and more compelling than Buck had hoped.

Buttons and Patience by Tizniz/ @tizniz (PWP | 2K | Explicit): If anyone asks, Buck will blame Eddie’s buttons. Whenever Eddie wore those damn Henleys, he kept them reasonably buttoned up. But apparently not tonight. No, tonight those buttons were undone and exposing tantalizing skin, golden in the dimly lit bar lighting, and exposing Eddie’s collarbones. Buck wants to bite. Hard. Or lick. He’s not picky.

among the hungry and the patient by tinygiantsam/ @watchyourbuck (PWP | 3K | Mature): “Wanna make out?” Eddie blinked. Understandably so, by the way. He licked his lips, frowned, and took a step forward. “Excuse me?” Buck inhaled softly, somehow encouraging himself even more. “I said, do you wanna make out?” OR: Buck loses his patience with Eddie and asks him to make out.

Once Is A Mistake, Twice Is On Purpose by Tizniz/ @tizniz (Friends With Benefits | 5K | Teen): “Friends with benefits.” “Yeah.” “Just sex.” “Just sex.” Buck confirms, nodding.

Take It by Tizniz/ @tizniz (PWP | 2K | Mature): “Take it, Buck.” Eddie tells him when they break apart, squeezing Buck’s wrists. “Take it all.” “H-huh?” “This is about you and your pleasure.” Eddie gives his wrists another squeeze before he releases them, humming once more in approval when Buck keeps his hands there, fingers curling around the edge. And then Eddie grabs onto Buck’s hips, pulling him forward roughly against Eddie’s thigh. “Take what you want. What you need.”

WIP

if i need to rearrange my particles — i will for you. by dylaesthetics (Post-S6, Identity Porn | 4/16 | 15K | Teen): OR Buck joins a support app for first responders and matches with a firefighter who has PTSD and a kid who likes giraffes, apparently.

🔥 a foundation of trust and love we cannot see by lemonzestywrites/ @lemonzestywrites (FWB, BDSM, Sub Eddie, Dom Buck | 3/17 | 62K | Explicit): “It’s like I want to explore it and dive into it, but it’s not exactly like I’m seeing someone to try this all out with,” he explains, doing his best to keep down the annoyed huff that threatens to escape him at every other word. Buck nods to himself before steadily going silent. For a minute, Eddie thinks that this is the end of their conversation. “I can show you if you’d like.” Eddie nearly chokes on his beer.

🔥 because we'll all arrive in heaven alive by callmenewbie/ @puppyboybuckley (Post-S6, Disaster Fic | 6/9 | 41K | Explicit): During a search and rescue, Eddie disappears without a trace, leaving Buck to grapple with the sudden possibility of a life without him.

🔥 Things We're All Too Young to Know by Daisies_and_Briar / @cal-daisies-and-briars (Canon S1-S6, S7 Spec | 119/? | 357K | Mature): This is a love story. Even if it doesn’t always look like it. Even if it doesn’t always feel like it. A look back on Eddie and Buck's lives up to now, and what led them to each other, interpreted from the current 9-1-1 canon.

Re-Read

🔥Plus or Minus by ElvenSorceress/ @elvensorceress (S5 | 10K | General): “Why are you cleaning out the kitchen? Why is my stuff in boxes?” Eddie slows, then stops. “Figured you’d want it back.” It’s quieter. Pained. When he says it. “I haven’t decided anything. So unless you’re kicking me out—” “Buck. Come on.” He’s not angry or snapping. It’s still quiet, and somehow that hurts even more. He’s resigned and defeated, and Buck is a scooped out, gutted, hollow shell. “I know how this ends the same way you do. You want to be loved, you want to be married. You’re going to leave. Might as well…” His voice cracks before he can finish and get it under control. “Shouldn’t drag it out.” ~ Taylor is offered a job across the country and asks Buck to go with her. Buck has to figure out if he wants to start over or if he has a reason to stay right where he is.

[playstation-dreamcast]

Hi, so I wanna talk more about Grant on here, but truly the only way to understand the son is to know the father. So, you know that that means!

A NOT SO BRIEF INTRODUCTION TO ELIAS MCBRIDE!

Early Life:

Elias McBride was born to Donovan and Patrica McBride on August 12, 1960, making him a Leo- the worst zodiac of them all. (I'm also a Leo, don't come for me.)

Born tragically catholic, he was the eldest of nine sibling, three brothers and six sisters- some of which are younger than his own son. While he officially became a father in his teens, Elias had been preforming the father role to his siblings since he was like- eight. Honestly, he was never particularly good at it, and resented having to be- for lack of a better term- the "man of the house" from such a young age. But, with a drunkard for a father, what's a guy to do?

apparently hook up with a perfect stranger at a house party when you're 15, just to be forced to marry her four months later when she starts showing. Not how I personally would have gone about that, but to each their own.

He was always more focused on his studies and getting the fuck out of Texas, and out of his middle of no where town. He knew he didn't exactly have the funds to do so on his own- he came from a family of pig farmers for Christ sake. So, he focused on what he was good at: virology, anatomy, and human biology in the hopes of getting a grant and or scholarship and becoming a doctor.

You wouldn't believe how happy he was when Spencer and the Umbrella corporation showed interest in him, offering him a scholarship they give to "bright, young minds" to attend their training facility.

IMPORTANT: THE LOYALTY NEURON:

And before we go any further, we need to get into Elias's fucked up genetics. This goes far beyond him, to his ancestor Ephraim McBride. A former suitor of Mother Miranda's.

When Miranda first discovered the mold, she knew that people were going to come for this power and for her. She wasn't scared of these outside forces, but she would have rather not have been interrupted while trying to do her work and bring back her daughter.

So, she did what any sane person would do and started to genetically experiment on her least insufferable suitor- Ephraim- using the mold and wolf DNA to create the perfect guard dog. This early version of the lycan could pass as a human, but had inhuman strength, speed, hearing, and sense of smell.

They also came equipped with the Loyalty Neuron, a switch in their brain that when triggered left them imprinted on whoever triggered it. Loyal to a fault, protective to the point of being willing to die for their attached, and (in some, but not all) virtually unable to deny them a request.

it slowed down the aging process, but didn't halt it. Luckily, the Gene was passed down to his decedents. Including one who ran from Miranda's cruelty by taking refuge in the states. And now we're here!

Code Veronica:

Skipping over some important bits here, but what you need to know is that in 1987 Elias was caught by Umbrellas "misappropriating" company assets (stealing samples of progenitor and T.) Wesker helped him fake his own death to get away from Umbrella so they wouldn't kill him. Elias perceived this as Albert saving his life, and as such triggered the Loyalty Neuron. Cool? Cool!

*Note, I know the picture says he faked his death in 1992, I need to update his reference sheet

Elias's first appearance! At this point he had spent just over 10 years forcefully separated from Wesker, and is genuinely still processing the relief of being near him again. Elias had always been prone to...obsessive, tendencies, and the Loyalty Neuron (henceforth referred to as LN) makes everything so much worse and more intense as we will soon see. He's giddy, and spends most of the gaming coming off as a psychotic asshole. spends even MORE of the game bullying Chris and trying to make his life hell out of spite and jealousy. I mean, the man Elias has unwittingly dedicated his entire soul and being too won't shut up about this guy, can you blame him for being petty?

Also, shoots Grant in the chest, so, ya know dad of the year really

Resident Evil 4:

It's at this point Elias really starts coming into his own, developing a sick fascination with Las Plagas and happily dedicating any free time he has into researching it for Wesker. He also adopts two lab rats that he got attached too purely because humans will pack bond with anything, so really he's thriving.

He's both incredibly shocked and not at all surprised to see Grant with this Leon guy in Spain. He's a man who despite his faith in science also believes in fate and destiny, the universal narrative and all that jazz. Of course he'd come across his magnum opus and his first, greatest mistake now: while he was teetering on the precipice of something big.

Thing is, he fucking hates Saddler. He sees him as annoying, childish, and too idiotic to think beyond his on myopic desires. So, whenever he's sure that it's not going to interfere with Albert's ultimate goal of getting the amber, he's not above pulling the strings behind the scene to make sure that asshole gets put right back in his place in hell.

also to make sure that Grant gets cured of Las Plagas, but he won't admit it and will physically fight you if you try to call him out on it

Resident Evil 5:

Okay, so Elias is in bad shape here. Post Lost in Nightmares, Wesker discovered both Elias's and Spencer's research on the LN. Once he realizes just how deep Elias's loyalty and admiration go for him, Wesker takes full advantage of this new found power dynamic.

Not that Elias is complaining. Once Wesker starts to spiral in to mania, Elias isn't far behind. Suddenly, ever word out of Wesker's mouth is gospel, and Elias full intends to see his vision of a new world all the way through- even if Uroboros consumes him in the end.

He's fully aware of what's happening and what they're doing, and some small part of him begs him to stop. To figure out how to walk away. Sometimes, late at night he'll let that voice ring in his ears, but never more for a few moments before he remembers that that part of him is stupid and should die. He's in it for the long haul with Wesker, and as long as Wesker keeps saying all the right things to him he will gladly keep being his dog.

This also just so happens to be the first game where he tries to kill Grant for real for real, no shooting him where he knows Grant's wearing kevlar, the kid gloves are OFF. Why? Well, because his Weskee asked him too ofc.

Yeah, you're never gonna guess how he reacted to the end of the game.

Resident Evil 6:

TW: SUICIDE IDEATIONS

The answer was "Not Well."

With his attached gone the LN has basically set Elias into self destruct mode. In fact, the only reason he hasn't is because one of the final orders Wesker ever gave him was for him to live. So here he is.

Though, he wouldn't exactly call this living.

He finds out via Ada of all people that some asshole has stolen his entire life's work, as well as the life's work of his soulmate, to use for sex pest shit of all things, and SUDDENLY he has a reason to live again, albeit temporary.

Knowing he can't take this one on his own, he manages to contact Grant (who was in the middle of his own crisis thanks to Chris fucking wondering off this plane of existence) letting him know that he has insider knowledge on the C-Virus and can help him get revenge for his fallen teammates as long as Grant helps him kill Simmons first.

Oh, and also "I'll finally tell you why you're so fucking weird. No, it's not progenitor...that's probably not helping though. Yeah...yeah, my bad."

He gets his mini redemption arch here, actually fighting with the good guys for once and finally fully in control of his own actions for what feels like the first time in well...ever.

He's still not sure where Wesker ends and he begins though.

He finally explains their entire family history, giving them the tip on Miranda and permanently altering Chris and Grant's relationship in irreparable ways. The BSAA deems him a valuable asset that "wasn't working under his own volition" and decided to keep him around for their own use.

Grant shoots him in the head anyways. Don't worry, it's a mercy killing. It's what Elias would have wanted 💖💖💖

[insomniac4000]

First Impressions ChrisMD

Bethany Margaret Johnson didn't sound like a popstar name so she used the moniker Annie J professionally. Her first top ten single "Like Me" debuted in the charts at number four when she was just nineteen years old and she had gone from strength to strength over the past seven years. The thing that Bethany or Betsy to her friends believed what set her apart from others and the reason for her continued success was her love for music had never wavered.  Even when she was being hounded by the press and paparazzi, spent months away from home, was working fifteen or sixteen hour days for tour preparations she still loved her music. That didn't stop at her music either, she loved music in general and always kept up to date with the goings on, her contemporaries and competition as well as newer artists. 

Betty could be a perfectionist and would be the first person to admit she could be a bit of a control freak about things, she was never rude with it as she had a great team but she was not one of these artists where the team did all of the work, she needed to know all of the goings on, she chose the setlists for her shows, if the record company wanted to release a certain song she would push back as much as she could to fight her corner, she okayed her outfits and she always chose her own support acts. Her her latest UK tour the artists she had chosen to open for her was the Welsh MACY and the singer and TikTok/Youtube star Arthur Hill. She had previously has Talia Mar open for her a couple of years ago which exposed her a little to the online world, Betsy had to admit that was the one part of her job she was happy to hand over to her team, it wasn't really a world she knew too much about but Talia's then boyfriend and now husband Simon seemed like a decent guy. Her and Talia had struck up a friendship and she was even invited to Talia's wedding, she went despite the fact that she didn't know anyone. 

*Flashback*

"You look so beautiful! Congratulations," Betsy smiled as she hugged Talia, as the bride was the only person she really knew properly at the wedding it was a little awkward but she was glad to see her friend get married. 

"Thank you, you look gorgeous I'm so glad you're here! Now we've sat you next to one of Simon's friends Chris," Talia started to explain but Simon cut her off as he hugged Betsy while she congratulated him. 

"He's not long been dumped so sorry if he's a bit miserable." The sideman commented.

"Oh great," Betsy rolled her eyes a little, she came for fun. 

"He's a nice guy I think he was just blindsided by the whole thing but he is dating again so you might have fun," Talia teased and Betsy smiled but rolled her eyes. She walked round the room a little before finding her table and she smiled at the dirty blonde boy with piercing blue eyes. He had some facial hair which peppered a nice and not too defined jaw line. He was wearing a blue suit with a soft yellow gold tie, he looked good and obviously knew how to dress for an occasion. 

"Hi, I'm Bethany," Betsy  smiled as she sat down, smoothing out her gold dress as she did so. 

"Chris nice to meet you," the male said smiling showing off his white but slightly crooked teeth, not only was he cute but he was refreshingly normal. She had dated before, and as a musician the press were all over it, she dated her childhood sweetheart for six years but when they split when she was twenty five and she was linked with a model and a couple of footballers the press went wild. She wasn't a fan of footballers, she doesn't know why she did it and wasn't sure if it was all footballers or the ones she chose but they were self absorbed and pretty sure had photographers of speed dial. 

"So what do you do? The brunette asked taking a sip of water which had been pre poured in glasses. 

"Oh I do football videos on Youtube," Chris explained, Betsy surprised a sigh, not again. "You do music, right?" Chris asked also taking a sip of water, it was too early in the day to  be drunk yet. 

"Yeah," Betsy nodded she didn't mind being recognised but in some circles it could be so superficial. 

"I really loved that one you did  about the note. I had that on repeat for a while," Chris admitted and Betsy smiled, the song, Pen to Paper was an album track so he was obviously a fan.

"Thank you. I'm sorry I can't say I've watched any of your videos," she apologised, turning in her chair a little to face Chris slightly more.

"It's okay, it's like a ninety seven percent male audience so I'm not surprise, and thank you for the honesty."

The pair were interrupted as more people joined their table and introductions were made as well as Chris there were four couples on the table, Will and Mia, Theo and Jodie, Chip and Sabina and Callum and Laura. Betsy knew what Talia was trying to do, as the wine and conversation flowed it was working. 

By the end of the night Betsy and Chris were on the dance floor together getting incredibly close, his hands on her bum during fast dances and their arms around each other during slow ones. 

"Your room or mine?" Chris whispered in a gruff tone when the place was starting to empty and the after party was beginning. They had a good time and the pair swapped numbers but she grew disappointed with him when she messaged him but failed to receive a reply so she thought her very first impression of him was spot on, stupid footballers.

*Present day*

"Ah here she is!" Betsy's tour manager Lance announced when Betsy walked into the room. 

"Hi, I am so sorry I had a meeting and it overran," she apologised before shaking the hands of her support acts, she was meeting them for the first time and wanted to get to know them a little bit better, break the ice and give a run down of how she usually ran things. While she wasn't uptight she wasn't the biggest fan of the sex, drugs, and rock and roll cliche, she didn't care what people did on their own time so long as they arrived on time for rehearsals and their stage slots and didn't flaunt things in the public eye something which was a very reasonable request. 

Everything was set and everyone then had some casual chat to get to know each other a little bit. Soon Betsy was called away for another interview and made her goodbyes.

"Really nice to meet you both, let me or Lance know if you have enough tickets for friends and family I'm sure we can sort some things out, and VIP passes and things. 

"Oh great, my roommates said they're free to come now," Arthur mentioned  and Betsy nodded. 

"We'll sort them out don't worry," the brunette smiled before being ushered off.

Tour went underway and was a huge hit, they reached London of which there were three dates.

"This is really cool," George commented as him and his other housemates enjoyed the backstage tour. 

"It is, the crowds have been great too." The musician responded looking at his friends and noticing the smallest of the four was staring at the door as he clutched his beer, something he had been doing since he got there. 

"You've been very quiet," Arthur H said to Chris who just nodded his head, he was in two minds about whether he wanted to see Betsy or not, he did intend on messaging her back but by the time he got round to it it was a long time, plus he was quite intimidated by being with someone well known his relationship with Shannon was under the microscope enough and they were only two content creators. 

"Hi Arthur," Betsy chimed as she walked into his dressing room, stopping dead in her tracks when she saw the short male, his hair had changed but it was undeniably him, she looked in those eyes long enough to know them. 

"Sorry I didn't know you had company," Betsy went to retreat as she stared at the curly haired man who was suddenly finding his shoes very interesting.

"These are my flatmates, Arthur, George and Chris. Guys this is Betsy otherwise known as AnnieJ," Arthur Hill explained pointing out everyone in turn. George greeted her with a hug, Arthur and Chris settled for a handshake, the two previous lovers ignoring the spark of electricity that flowed through their hands. 

"Have you got time to hang out for a little bit?" Arthur asked, Betsy nodded as she didn't want to be rude plus the other two could be a laugh. 

Chris looked on clutching his beer bottle so hard his knuckles turned white staring at Betsy who was laughing at one of George's jokes. 

"Sorry I need to get ready, enjoy the show guys, it was nice to meet you Arthur and George and hopefully I'll see you after?" Betsy smiled before rushing off out the room. 

"What is your problem? We've only heard two grunts out of you," George commented pointing at Chris who just shrugged. 

"This is just not my scene," he replied, saying more words than he he had spoken in the past two hours.

"Okay, well next time I'll give your space to someone else," Arthur Hill replied as he checked the time, it was approaching show time. 

"This is nothing to do with the fact you two slept together at Simon's wedding and she's obviously forgotten about it," Arthur TV explained, he had only gotten Chris's side of the story so didn't know he had failed to message Betsy back. George and Arthur Hill looked at each other before laughing. 

"Chris we need to get you fixed," Arthur Hill joked before announcing he had to go and warm up. 

The show had calmed Chris down somewhat, MACY was good, Arthur was great and he enjoyed watching Betsy, it was obvious she loved doing what she did things changed slightly again when she sang one of her hit songs Infamy. On the surface it just sounded like the song was about relationships but there was a deeper meaning which was about the press's judgement and hounding of people's personal lives. There was one moment where Chris swore Betsy looked at him momentarily and he felt incredibly guilty, he ghosted her because of something she was already afraid of he felt small, well even smaller.

Arthur Hill was slightly surprised when Chris asked if he could come again, considering he was quiet the day before but Arthur agreed and this time Chris came with a plan. He kept himself a little scarce at the beginning but watched her intently from the side lines that was the first time Betsy noticed his presence there. 

After the show Chris knocked on Betsy's dressing room door he took a deep breath when he heard a soft come in. Chris couldn't help but smile when he saw Betsy in black leggings and a green jumper. Her regular casual self was so much different to her stage persona, she was just a regular girl underneath it all and Chris wanted to get to know her and not the flashy musician exterior he was afraid of before. 

"Hi, good show," Chris smiled. Betsy just nodded before placing her glasses on, her eyes got tired if she wore her contacts for too long. 

"Look I have been an absolute arsehole and if you don't want to listen to me excuses that's fine but I think I owe you an explanation," Chris continued and Betsy looked at him. His blue eyes looked so sincere, so kind and there was something about his little face she couldn't resist. 

"Look if you didn't want anything else a simple text would have sufficed," Betsy replied as she sat on the arm of the grey sofa. 

"But I did! I looked you up and saw all these stories and got flustered. When my ex and I broke up there's still jokes going on about it now and she still gets comments on social media and I just thought about how much worse it would be," Chris admitted and Betsy sighed, she had heard this before. 

"I get it. It's fine."

"It's not, look you probably don't want anything else to do with me but I just owed you a sorry." 

"I didn't say I didn't want anything more to do with you," Betsy smiled getting up from the sofa  and walking slowly over to Chris who nodded as he gave a small but cheeky smile. 

"Good," he smiled before his and Betsy's lips touched. 

[kennedyslvr]

TENNESSEE WHISKEY, STRAWBERRY WINE — CHAPTER 19 (AO3)

heyyy everyone! it's a new week! currently feeling pretty sleepy still because i went to the playstation concert last night in London (!!!!) and we got home super late lol but it was fun! i got me a TLOU shirt that came w a free pin that is currently on my gym tote next to my RE one hehe.

anyways, enjoy the chapter! jealous!leon things hehe. also... that plot point about the horse will def crop up again in a much later chapter. :3

full chapter here!

I feel like I might burn a hole through this woman's head with how hard I’m staring at her. And maybe I want to.

I don't even know what I’m fucking doing here. I’m not a fan of the gym—I prefer working out through hard manual labor rather than protein shakes and dieting. I did that shit back when I was in the rodeo and crafted a good enough body that is still easily sustained through hard living, so I don't need some prissy commercial gym in the center of town to make me feel any better.

But then she had to come sauntering out of the house in black leggings and a grey padded sports bra after two whole months of not talking to me, and suddenly I had the urge to check out that gym.

Yeah, I know this is unhealthy for a man of my age. Any sane person would call me a walking red flag and threaten to call the cops on me for being a borderline creep, stalking her like this. The sane part of me calls me that, that tiny little part of my brain currently being smothered by raging testosterone as I just watched her get asked out by Chris fucking Redfield.

I’m not mad at Chris. I don't mind Chris. He’s a good kid, he comes from good stock. I know that. But, I’m also running on fumes, dealing with a ticking jaw that clenches whenever Chris brushes up against her and the lance of irritation whenever those eyes of hers sparkle at something he says.

I had been a fucking idiot that day. I had brought Ada back to the ranch with me after our little moment in that lay-by, not realising that Dee hadn’t gone to Claire’s motel like she had said she would. And I let Ada walk down those fucking stairs and introduce herself to Dee, and I didn't fucking correct her.

I had been a fucking floundering idiot, and paid the price by her shutting me out whenever I tried to talk to her. I could never bring it up at dinner in front of her family for obvious reasons, and whenever we had a slight sliver of alone time, she took every opportunity to run out of there before I could open my mouth.

She had forced me to watch her pretend that she’s fine, forcing me into a cage and throwing away the key.

“Leon?”

Fuck. Chris is waving at me now, grinning like a fucking golden retriever as he beckons me over. Dee shuffles next to him, staring down at the ground like she’s waiting for it to open up and swallow her whole.

You and me both, sweetheart.

My feet move awkwardly. I don't want to be a part of this conversation and watch them make goo-goo eyes at each other. I had just caught the tail-end of their conversation, and I’m not in the mood to clap Chris on the back and wish him good luck.

But I’m in front of them now, and I have to say something. “Hey, Chris.” I nod with a tight-lipped smile towards a man I suddenly consider my rival, as fucking idiotic and obsessive as that sounds. Then, I glance at Dee, who still can't stand to look at me.

The urge to reach out and grab her chin and force her to meet my gaze, to see that I’m here, that I’m here to fucking stay whether she likes it or not, is a strong one. We have to co-exist—she has to stop shutting me out.

Fuck. I need out of this conversation.

“Dee.”

“Leon.” Her voice is clipped, as if saying my name hurts her. Saying her name hurt me.

“What are you doing here, man?” Chris takes charge of the conversation again, clapping me on the back in that annoyingly familiar way. My back burns from the combination of his slap and the ache of working out at age forty-six and pushing myself for a woman's attention like a fucking loser.

“Working out?”

“Well, yeah, I know that.” Chris sees my deadpan expression as something funny, laughing it off with that boisterous laugh of his that, in the moment, makes me want to shove my foot up his ass.

Since when did I become a fucking grizzly? Jeez.

“Why didn’t you come and join us? We could have worked out together, man!”

I didn't join you because the girl you just asked out would have killed me on the fucking spot, and I would have fucking let her.

“You looked like you were having fun.” I shrug casually, playing this nonchalantly. My eyes flit to Dee as she sucks in a breath and finally looks up from the floor, but she still doesn't look at me. She looks at Chris, those brown pools flit over every inch of him like she’s searching for something.

“I didn't wanna intrude.”

“You wouldn't have.” Chris earnestly promises, pressing a hand over his heart. “It would have been an honour to work out with you, dude. But, fine. If you insist that you didn't wanna intrude—”

“I didn’t—”

“Then I’m not gonna fight you on it.” Chris has that easy smile that seemed so disarming, but it isn't working on me right now. Right now I’m wound tight like a coil, waiting for that one thing that would push me over the fucking edge.

I want to turn back the clock. I want to apologise to her for being an idiot, tell her that I did want her, but there were so many fucking complications—and I made them all the more fucking complicated by just… being stupid and unworthy of her.

I clear my throat, taking this moment where I have her in my orbit to say something, anything. “How’s Rocky doing?”

“Rocky?” Chris tilts his head curiously.

Dee swallows with a low sigh. “Rocky,” her voice is still hoarse, rough like gravel. “He’s my new jumping horse. I’m thinking of getting back into the circuit again. Entering some comps.”

“Really?” Chris brightens even more at that, like he isn't smiling with a wattage that rivals the sun. Envy twists in my gut at the sight, but I also feel a tiny bloom of pride in my chest as I think about Dee doing showjumping.

When she had jumped on Daxon that day, sailing through the air like a bird, I had been enamoured. She had so much fun out there, and she looked amazing doing it—attractive and alluring, as well as graceful and elegant. So, naturally, when I had heard through the grapevine that some rancher in a town halfway across the state was selling up to move closer to the city to be with his granddaughter, and was looking for people to take his horses and make them proper winners, I took one look at Rocky and drove the fuck up there to bring him home with me.

For her.

But she thinks that Brian got him for her, and so that is how it’ll stay—especially now, of all times.

“You’re gonna do great out there.” Chris says genuinely, and the words sting—because I want to be the one to say them.

I want to be the one to make her smile bashfully like that, to make her make that little snort noise that she makes for him as she rolls her eyes. “Thanks, Chris. I don't know when I’m gonna enter yet. I’m still thinking it over, testing out his abilities. He runs smooth during practice, but I don't know how he’ll be during the real thing—”

“He’ll be fine so long as you’re the one riding him.”

The words are out of my mouth before I can stop them, and I hate how growly I sound. She flinches a little bit, stiffening momentarily before relaxing and squaring her shoulders in that familiar way that told me she’s about to shut me out again, that that was the last thing I will get to say to her for the next week or so.

“Thanks for the vote of confidence.”

Now her words sting, tipped with poison headed straight for my heart. And I’m welcoming that burn because at least she’s talking to me.

“Anyways,” Chris smoothly transitions, either not noticing the tension between us or not caring. “Dee, we’re on for The Hay Barn tonight? I could pick you up around.. eight? Pre-drinks at Carlos’ before hitting the floor?”

There goes my fucking jaw ticking again. The mention of Carlos’ reminds me of the time she was on the bar and I caught her. The mention of The Hay Barn has me remembering the feeling of her legs wrapped around my waist and my tongue in her mouth and on her skin.

“Yeah, sure.” Dee hums, and I know I’m definitely done here. Those cage bars slam down on me again, and she’s taunting me from the other side, rubbing it in my face—too bad, you lose, try again never.

“Well,” I don't give a shit how I sound now. “I best get going. I’ve got stuff to get back to back at the ranch, so..”

[atlasblue85]

first line game! rules: share the first lines of ten of your most recent fanfics

i was tagged by @redrosydiaz and @young-waverer ty both!! if you're reading this consider yourself tagged :)

i can take the pillowcases off the yellow pillows “Honey,” his wife says, laying a hand on his arm, “why don’t you go inside and check on Eddie? He’s been in there an awfully long time for getting more drinks.”

oh, lift up your head, boy The tv screen is small and far away, tucked into the ceiling corner of the diner they always go to on Fridays after school, but Chris can just faintly pick up the tinny voice of the news anchor over the din of Aiden and Ezra bemoaning their algebra test from this morning while Jake texts his new girlfriend. Chris thought the test was easy, and he’s not sure if that’s a good sign or a bad one.

tainted love's too fast to dance to Eddie props the phone up against the shelf in the living room, selfie cam on, and takes his spot on the floor. Back straight, arms up, hips tucked in, feet at the ready. He takes a few steps, spins his invisible partner, it’s all going smoothly, and then, as he goes to do a turn of his own, his feet get tangled up and he trips over himself. Again.

take the long road and you'll find your way out He’s not mad, exactly. Just surprised, mostly. And a little embarrassed, though whether it’s for him or his dad, he’s not totally sure. Maybe a little of both.

could you trust love if i prove it's there? “Hey, man,” Ravi says, clapping him on the shoulder as he walks into the locker room. “How’d it go the other night?” He wiggles his eyebrows and a weight drops in Buck’s stomach.

what's left if i let you go? They pull into the first gas station they see, a Gas & Sip about six miles from Maddie and Chim’s house. Buck honestly couldn’t say what time it is, despite having looked at his phone about twelve trillion times in the past few hours, despite having found himself zoning out staring at the clock on Eddie’s dash more than once. More than twice.

just this quiet after you It’s for the best, really, that Blaze went back to his family. Obviously. And not just because he has a family that he loves who also love him, though of course that’s the most important thing. But because now that Buck’s alone, again, staring down his life in boxes all over the nearly empty loft, he thinks that yeah, he really doesn’t have a lifestyle suitable for a dog.

holding me in one piece in your walls “Alright, Buckaroo,” Bobby says as he slows to a stop on South Bedford Street, “you want me to drop you here or at your place?”

(it's probably not surprising) that you're burning through the days Early on, Eddie kept track of the days. As soon as he realized what was going on, he started counting. At 30, he felt despair – an entire month’s worth of his life gone, wasted on a single day, over and over again. At 50, he started getting angry – would he age in here while everyone else stayed the same?

[thewolvesof1998]

Alright, Cowboy, Go Get 'Em

Okay the first Chapter is posted!! (1/3 Chapter, 5.6K, E) 

Eddie isn’t mopping. He’s having a drink at his local bar, by himself that’s all. He’s not thinking about the divorce papers sitting in his bedside drawer where Christopher won’t find them. He sighs, downing the last of his whiskey. He’s waving down the bartender, signally for another when a hand comes down on his shoulder.

A familiar voice says, “Eddie Diaz is that you?”

Eddie turns to take in Josh, one of his best friends from high school whom he hasn’t seen since before he deployed the first time. He looked good, he’d lost most of his youth softness, and a full beard where he’d only been able to grow whiskers before.

“Josh? Man, it’s been so long” Eddie says, pulling him into a one-handed hug, something he wouldn’t have done if wasn’t already on his third drink of the night.

Josh laughs, “Yeah, didn’t know you were back in El Paso”

Eddie grimaces, guilt sitting heavy in his stomach, he hadn’t reached out to any of his friends from high school after returning, he hadn’t wanted them to see how much his life had fallen apart. The bartender places his drink down in front of him and he takes a drag for courage.

“I’ve been back about six months now, I’d meant to reach out but…”

“It’s okay man, life gets in the way,” Josh shrugs, “How’s Shannon? You guys have a kid right?” Josh sits down on the stool next to him and Eddie tries not to hate Josh for bringing up exactly what he’d been trying to forget.

“Yeah Christopher, he’s five now, but uh me and Shannon aren’t-she left” Eddie tries for nonchalance but from the pitying look on Josh’s face he doesn’t succeed.

“I’m sorry man”

“Nah it's fine, it’s been-ah six months, I’m over it,” Eddie says, Josh rises an eyebrow. He wasn’t really lying, he had been over it, been understanding, she’d gone to look after her dying mum and he was the one who’d left first, that was until the papers had shown up on Monday and there was nothing about dual custody in them. Shannon hadn’t just left him, she’d left Christopher.

“Sure, and it has nothing to do with you drinking alone at two pm on a Thursday?”

“I just needed a break,” Eddie admits, it was probably a bit too honest for a conversation with a guy he hasn’t seen in almost six years but Josh just nods.

“What you need is to have a little bit of fun”

Eddie snorts, “I have three jobs and a kid, I don’t have time for fun”

“What are you doing Saturday?”

“I have Chris” When he’s not working, which is not often, he spends as much time with Chris as possible.

“Me and the boys are going to the rodeo, come with us, Chris is five right? My Misses has a kid about that age, bring him over for a play date she’ll look after him for a few hours.”

“I don’t know”

“Look, I know we haven’t talked in years so I might be crossing over the line but if you run yourself into the ground you're not going to be any good for your kid okay? You need to have some fun and let off some steam, or you’ll end up here every day like Bill over there” Josh nods over to the town drunk who’s barely staying upright on his stool at the other end of the bar.

Eddie sighs and nods, “Yeah, yeah your right, okay, Saturday I’ll be there.”

Josh claps his hand on Eddie’s shoulder again, “You won’t regret it.”

Eddie highly doubts that but he also knows that the spiralling he’s been doing isn’t healthy and talking to Josh has been the highlight of his week so he’d give it a go.

Continue Reading on A03

Let me know if you want me to tag you in any updates to do with this fic!

@wildlife4life​ you asked for the cowboy smut...

[wh4thefnk]

https://vt.tiktok.com/ZSNxRGdB8/

Between Leggings Girl #1 (Sarah Temima) and Leggings Girl #2 (_fitnessbyamee), honestly I believe it. But hE dOeSn’T hAvE a PaTteRn WiTh AgE gApS apparently. The double standard and benefit of the doubt that he receives is actually sickening (derogatory). Assuming she’s telling the truth, this is yet more evidence that he was most likely looking for something deliberately.

He’s such a menace. 😭

Thank you for sharing, I saw this too late, the tik tok is gone but I know what this was since I just made a tumblr round (ᕑᗢूᓫ∗)

I want to talk about this just because I think the way this situation unraveled is a good representation of the pissing contest taking place in this fandom.

Here are the bullet points:

The lady was telling the truth, that much is obvious to me, I’m taking the screen recording as solid proof your honor.

It does not change the outcome nor does it take away from the validity of their relationship/marriage which only has to make sense to them.

It is evidence that he was indeed using Instagram as Tinder, colour me shocked.

He was seeking out 20 year olds. No matter if they were from the USA, Sweden, Portu-tehehehehe.

That second screen recording shared by that same PR blog, pretty clear to me the 'six months later' message had actually been there but was deleted afterwards for some reason. (If we get technical it was her saying it, not him).

He wasn’t distasteful in those DMs. (Apparently this is worth noticing; as if it means he was hitting her up to exchange workout routines)

Ultimately this could have been so simple and yet. Clearly he wasn’t committing a crime, so what's with all the pearl clutching I'm hearing, huh? In this specific case there was not really a need to retaliate but I digress. On the other side if people were twisting what she actually said outside of the two screen recordings, manipulating things like that won’t change the reality of his life and choices, but again I digress.

People are deflecting from the moral of this story: Chris 'I only have a pattern of dating age appropiate women in public' Evans was using Instagram to pursue women specifically 10+ years younger than him. And all those follows make more sense in this context even more so now. That’s it.

You could think it is wrong, or you could think that it is fine, that’s okay, but this was more of a slap back for the ones who were still acting o b t u s e and defensive about (very logical) speculations about his instagram activity; nothing more, nothing less.

Anyway; this was just another episode of Tumblr High School.

[clodpid]

Love Thy Neighbour Chapter 5

Coming away from her interview, Ruth was feeling quietly confident. The three-person panel had grilled her for over thirty minutes on key nursing competencies and had raked over her qualifications with a fine-tooth comb. Ruth knew the drill from her previous interviews with American hospitals. With nearly fifteen years nursing experience in both Ireland and the US, Ruth knew that she was a highly skilled nurse, with the right skillset for this role. Now, having given the best interview that she could, it was out of her hands.

Back in the lobby, Ruth paused to slip out of her jacket and roll up her sleeves. Feeling more comfortable, she wandered through the foyer, hoping to spot a coffee shop or vending machine. Amid the many people, she thought she saw a familiar face, so Ruth walked a little closer. Trying not to be too obvious, she focused on the person. Just as she realised that she did indeed know the person, they looked up and recognised her too. They stood to greet their friend with a warm embrace.

“Ruth O’Neill! As I live and breathe! How are you?”

“Hey Laura. I am good. Looking for a job here. I just had an interview. All going well, we might be working together again soon.”

“Was that for the charge nurse position in neuro? You’d be a good fit for that position and God knows that we could be doing with a good manager up there. At the moment, it’s bedlam. Our manager retired last month and we’ve been rotating the job. But really, there’s no-one who has good enough organisational or leadership skills.”

“Oh really?”, Ruth asked, bouncing her eyebrows playfully. “What about you? You’ve got plenty organisational and leadership skills. Plus, it’s a role you’ve been in before.”

“Well, I did consider it but with Mike being overseas again, the kids need me at home. I just couldn’t take on the extra responsibility right now. Speaking of kids, how’s Lily?”

“Growing like a weed. It’s hard to believe that she’ll be six in a few months. I don’t where that time has gone. How are your boys doing. Chris must be heading off to college soon?”

“Chris is going to be starting at Washington State next fall. He’s going to take sports psychology. Josh and Justin are in their sophomore year. Still scraping through and breaking their teachers’ hearts with the lack of effort and enthusiasm. And Gordie is finishing elementary.”

“They are getting so grown up too. Don’t you ever wish that you could keep them small and sweet forever? Where is Mike deployed to this time?”

“He’s in Syria. He says its his last tour, but he said that last time and the time before that too. So, I’m not holding my breath.” Laura rolled her eyes to show her lack of belief in her husbands pronouncements.

“Hey, do you know where I can get a cup of coffee around her. As Mammy would say, I’m gasping for one.”

“There’s a coffee vendor outside. Go right at the door, towards the ambulance bay.”

“Thanks. Care to join me?”

Laura checked her watch and shook her head. “My breaks just about done but when you start work here, the coffee’s going to be on you! Look over there. See that brunette doctor. That’s the head of neuro, Ame…”.

“Amelia Shepherd. I’ve already met her. She’s my next-door neighbour. Seems nice.”

“She’s a tough cookie but we all love her. She’s a super surgeon and made name for herself on a big deal project to cure Parkinson’s.”

The two watched as Amelia strode confidently and, in Ruth’s opinion, rather sexily, through the lobby and out of the building.

“What’s the deal with her? She married or attached?” Ruth hoped that she wasn’t being too obvious for the second time that day.

Laura smirked knowingly but answered. “She’s single as far as I know. Has been for ages now. She had a thing with a non-binary scientist, but they didn’t work out. Her son’s dad was an orthopaedic surgeon here. He was killed in a terrible accident some years back. I remember her being pretty broken up about it at the time.”

Another check of her watch said Laura had to go so they embraced each other heartily and went their separate ways. Ruth found the coffee cart and was standing at the back of the queue when she felt a light tap on her shoulder. She turned to find Amelia smiling at her.

“Hello again. We have gotta stop meeting like this. People will start talking.”

“For sure. This place is like gossip central. Rumours can go all the way around the hospital like greased lightening. How did your interview go?”

“Pretty good. I’m confident. The head interviewer said that I would know one way or the other in a few days.”

They’d now reached the head of the line. “One iced vanilla latte and what are you having, Amelia?” Her name felt good in her mouth, Ruth thought.

“Oh no! You don’t have to do that Ruth. I can get my own or I can get yours?”

“Not at all, Amelia. This time, it’s on me.”

“Well, thank you. I will also have an iced vanilla latte.” She smiled in gratitude at Ruth. It was a smile that made Ruth’s heart flutter just that little bit faster. She hoped that she wasn’t blushing, at least not too furiously.

With their drinks in hand, the two strolled over to a bench shaded a little by the building itself. They sat down and Amelia sighed contentedly as she draw a cool sip from her cup.

“So, what area do you nurse in, Ruth?”

“Yours as it happens. I bumped into an old nursing buddy who works here. She mentioned that you were the head of neuro. The job I was interviewing for today was for the charge nurse position on the post-surgery neuro ward.”

“What are the odds? It’s crazy! This morning we didn’t know each other and now we are almost a double act.”

Ruth chuckled and Amelia joined her.

“Where are you from? Your accent? Is it Irish?”

“Yes ma-am. Well detected. I am a farmer’s daughter from the Irish midlands. Population of six, maybe seven hundred people and four times as many sheep.”

“What brought you to America?”

“Family drama, I suppose.” Seeing that Amelia was confused, Ruth went on.

“Being gay in a small, rural Irish village wasn’t easy. Everyone knew my business. It was like living in a goldfish bowl. One where not everyone was able to keep their disapproval to themselves. There were comments often passed at me and it got under my skin enough to drive me out of it and into college in Dublin.”

“I never really intended to go to college. It was my idea to stay home and work with Daddy on the farm. Don’t get me wrong, I like my job. Nursing has been an education and it has thought me all I know about people and the way that the world works. Plus, it has been my passport to the world. It’s been good to me and for me.”

“After I graduated, I got a job in Beaumont Hospital. That would be Ireland’s primary neurological centre of excellence. I found my stride there and I enjoyed life in the capital. I was free to be gay and there was no judgement. It was freeing.”

“So, Lily? How did she come to be?”

“In the usual way!”

Amelia gave Ruth a withering look and continued. “You mentioned that you were gay? Are you bisexual?”

“Oh, right yeah. No, I am gay. Lily is not my biological daughter, although I love her like she was. She is my niece. My sister Jenny got herself in trouble when she was barely eighteen. She wasn’t ready to be a mother and Mammy was adamant that she wouldn’t have a termination. So, it was decided that she’d have the baby and put it up for adoption.”

“I shouldn’t have asked. That’s not something that you want to be telling a relative stranger.”

Amelia made to stand but Ruth caught her hand and gently guided her back down.

“I wouldn’t be telling you this stuff if I didn’t want to. Believe me, I am fussy about who I share my secrets with. I think I can trust you with this.”

Amelia looked her in the eye and smiled. “I swear. It’s safe with me.”

“When Lily was born, that plan went out the window. I held her and instantly fell in love with her. I just couldn’t give her away. So, I adopted her as my own and we came to America to make a life of our own.”

“That’s a remarkable thing to do. I don’t think I could do it. Weren’t you afraid?”

“I was terrified. I mean, weren’t you when Scout was born? No-one prepares you for the all nighters, the crying, the endless dirty nappies, and the effective end of your love life. Still, I have no regrets. She’s the best thing that has ever happened to me. I couldn’t imagine my life without the little madam now.”

“The love consumes you, doesn’t it? Being a mom is the best feeling in the world. There’s just nothing that comes close.”

“That’s right.”

Amelia’s beeper sounded just then. “I need to check this. Sorry to do this to you again.”

Ruth shook her head dismissively. “It’s your job. Go ahead.”

Amelia turned a took a step before turning back. She wore her trademark smirk and Ruth was glad she was sitting as she was certain that it would have made her weak at the knees had she been standing. “So, you said the coffee was on you this time earlier. Do you want to do this again sometime?”

“Oh, yeah. I mean, yes. Yes I want to have coffee with you again. If you want too?”

“I wouldn’t have asked if I didn’t want to, Ruth.”

“Good. Well, it’s a date. No, not a date. It’s a plan. I meant to say it’s a plan.” There was no escaping the blushing now. Ruth felt her cheeks burning.

“It’s a date.” Amelia turned and headed away leaving a stunned Ruth behind.