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#what kind of stupid ass logic is that?
brucewaynehater101 · 4 months
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The number of times I've seen people argue that Bruce is a decent father and that he is not abusive absolutely blows my absolute mind.
Yes, you can hc whatever version of Bruce you want. You can even blame it all on bad writers or reject canon. You can claim comic!Bruce isn't your Bruce and main a different version of him. Those are all valid.
However, you can NOT say that he has ever been justified for hitting his kids. There is no excuse for him willingly laying his hands on his kids. It doesn't matter if the person is drunk, drowning in grief, lost in emotions, whatever. Hitting kids is not okay.
Continually, the physical abuse is a very obvious sign of Bruce being a shit dad in the comics. On top of that, there is so much emotional abuse and manipulation as well. He's shitty as fuck to his kids and there's no reason this is okay. He may love those kids, but that doesn't excuse his behaviors.
Anyways, reject canon Bruce all you want. There's certain aspects of other characters I reject, and DC stands for Disregard Canon. Feel free to have whatever version of Bruce you desire.
What is NOT okay is excusing or accepting canon Bruce's actions/behaviors as acceptable.
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torchickentacos · 2 months
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you ever scroll past some sort of discourse that you didn't even know existed, and you have to take a second and realize that, while none of us are superior to others, some of us ARE much better at choosing which dumbass hills to die on? because I think sometimes you deserve to go 'huh. at least I'm not getting involved in all that'.
#well idk i'm still wasting time typing this out but that's marginally less embarrassing as an outsider than the people arguing about it#tw abuse mention in tags#so APPARENTLY!!!#enneagram mbti people are complaining about enneagram 7s being predisposed to being manipulative (?)#someone's like 'my sister was a 7w8 and neglects her kids' like jesus christ i don't think her enneagram is why she does that?#saying this as someone who LOOSELY AND UNSERIOUSLY enjoys mbti/zodiac/boxes to put my blorbos into:#these people are just doing the zodiac but for people who think they can armchair diagnose others they dislike with cluster b disorders#like congrats you made it worse and combined it with pseudopsychology to make some hellish ableism amalgamation#and it was already stupid to begin with but man you really took it up to 100#like we do realize that this is all fake. right. this isn't an actual psychological profile.#and taking it seriously has worrying implications? and you cannot judge someone based on anything but their behavior?#like again i get having fun with these things as little categories. my autistic ass loves sorting things into categories.#i will give my blorbos full star charts for 6 hours. yay categories.#but with the caveat that it's unserious and for funsies and not at all an actual representation of any human being?#like when i say 'i'm such a taurus lol' or whatever i'm not actually under the impression that it dictates my actual personality?#it's all confirmation bias anyways. people see what they want out of this kind of thing#like yeah i'm kinda lazy and i like food and self indulgence but. that's probably like half of the. idk. virgo population or whatever too#i think those are just things that most human people enjoy unless you're one of those super ambitious go-getters who never slows down#same goes for every other trait. curiosity? emotion? stubbornness? logic? those are just things that most people have in some capacity
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vamptastic · 6 months
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Something I've been sort of thinking about is also getting some kind of liposuction on my hips alongside top surgery. Ideally I'd want to wait more on that and see what T and working out can do given time, but it's significantly cheaper and saves me from going under twice if I do them both at once, and I definitely want top surgery ASAP.
Idk, it also kind of feels like a moral failing in a way, though that's in no small part due to societal ideas and not just my own. The whole 'you're just insecure about your body, not trans' was a big talking point for both my parents, and even if i was getting RID of a conventionally attractive female body type, I think they'd still see it that way literally just because of the connotations of liposuction.
I honestly don't feel that negatively about my body type on its own, and I see myself feeling much more positively about my overall body without giant boobs in the way, but it undeniably attracts negative attention and makes it harder to pass. I find guys with a more feminine, sort of Rubenesque body fat distribution quite attractive, but it's difficult to imagine myself embodying that.
It's also difficult to decouple my self image here from comments I've received on my body, both positive and negative. It's just generally what people see as hyperfeminine, but not necessarily desirable. Though they also have always picked up on some kind of inborn masculinity as well. There's also been a lot of times where people have referred to me as male while openly commenting on my body to comment on how oddly feminine (and therefore, gay) I seem to them, usually focused on my ass for some fucking reason.
Idk. Not sure how much of that is about finding some sort of 'inner self' and how much of it is just everyday insecurity and annoyance at being sexualized. I mean, most cis women seem to feel much more positive about these traits, even if they receive unwanted sexual attention for them. And I would certainly be happy if testosterone were to move some of the fat off my hips. But idk, some irrational part of my brain still thinks of it as vain, frivolous, and a sign that I'm 'indulging my mental illness to avoid my true female destiny', or whatever the fuck people are getting at with that rhetoric, even though I think positively of people who have had similar operations
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blossom-hwa · 9 months
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I don't know what's going on anymore with this wip
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eelnoise · 8 months
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beset fixation (nsfw!)
trafalgar law x gn!strawhat!reader cw: smut, possessive law, law struggles w/ feelings, soft law, piv sex, implied situationship, emotional law an: so in my head this takes place in wano, and is kind of a heat of the moment emotional type thing. in my head law's stupid slutty kimono is draped around his shoulders btw hehe tagging: @bby-deerling @kaizokuniichan @themushroomofdeath @risenwrites
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Law is obsessed with you.
It eats at him, gnaws into his flesh like sharpened teeth. He feels childish, as if being played for a fool - but the fact of the matter is that you’ve clawed your way into his head. Law finds himself aching with an inexplicable pain that he cannot seem to mend on his own, one that snaps any strands of rationality in two and has him second, third, and fourth guessing his own words.
You’re a Strawhat. After this business is done and accounted for and the alliance ends, you’ll be enemies once again.
Yet Law can’t escape the deep-seated, profound, and frankly infuriating way you linger around in his mind. His inner thoughts speak in your voice, perfectly mimicking every single subtle nuance and tonal shift of the words you’ve spoken to him prior. He longs for your presence, even if he cannot reason with why. The only thing that Law has gleaned is that you are the root problem of it all - and he needs to let you go for his own sake.
Then why now does he have you upon hands and knees, back arched perfectly and covered in sweat while he buries himself as deep inside of you as he can?
Lithe fingers cup at your hips to keep you in place, tips digging into the pliant flesh with enough force to bruise twice over. Law’s pace is ruthless, pouring every single one of his feelings into you with every harsh thrust of his hips - and you still just don’t get it. Are you truly this oblivious to his behavior? How he craves the taste of your skin or the touch of your hands? He all but froths at the mouth when you’re with one of your crewmates, jaw clenching and fists balling at the thought of you leaving with them - leaving him behind.
Law grits his teeth in frustration, and takes it out with a rough smack to your ass. Your cry of ecstasy doesn’t go unnoticed, and his hold on you tightens further when your walls flutter against his cock. He can feel himself start to crumble, and with each salaciously delicious sound you spew he borders further and further off the edge of reality. 
What’s stopping him from keeping you, really?
He could have you whenever he wanted – your touch and body available at the drop of a coin. Nevermore would he need to feel the crushing burden of your absence, to mend the seams of woe that have frayed into his nerves. Try as he might to fight it, this burning desire is kindled when you're with him. 
And now, with you at his mercy beneath him, all thoughts feel like lies. Law feels his will breaking, and for a moment he casts logic aside. The smiles, the laughter, the vivid conversations you've shared – he wants them all to himself. It's selfish,and yet it can't be helped. 
Law's thoughts are interrupted by the sound of your voice. Pleas of finality reach his ears – soft, shaky cries of delirium emanating from your tongue. He knows what you want, and he isn’t about to give you what you want. Not yet.
He slips out of you then, giving you a much needed but very much unwanted moment of reprieve that's cut short before you can even turn your head up toward him in question. Law shifts his hold on your hips and flips you onto your back, hands curling against the undersides of your knees and pressing them toward your chest. Just as he’s realigning himself with you he pauses, unable to stop himself from raising his gaze to yours.
Law inhales sharply and can feel his gaze soften as he looks into your eyes. And in another bout of weakness does his heart leap, a warmth spreading within him that feels so unfamiliar but not unwelcome. He leans forward over your body to quickly capture your lips to his, simultaneously sheathing himself back within you. He swallows both the gasp from your throat as well as his own guilt, indulging himself in the wistful tangle of emotions and limbs that is this moment.
Your tongue eagerly twists into his, your arms coming to cross around his shoulders as if desperate to get as close to him as you can. Law obliges you, wrapping his own arms around your lower back and squeezing you to his chest – though he longs to melt into you entirely. He’s slower now, the rock of his hips beginning to move with more purpose and with an undeniable sense of not-so-hidden sentiment. 
It feels like his sense of self has vanished, and in its place stands someone he doesn’t know. As if the sums of his of attempts at reason had subtracted tenfold. His kiss doesn’t end - save for seconds of breath - slotting your lips together in a long sermon of implicit confessions that are long overdue.
The feeling overtakes him, and soon enough he’s muttering nonsense into your ear about how he needs you and how you make him feel. Telling you all the ways he craves your entire being, how much you’ve changed the way he thinks. It's more than he’s said to anyone at once before, and he doesn’t know – doesn’t care – where it’s coming from.
You reciprocate. It shocks him – the words falling from your tongue should sound foreign, but they don’t. They’re real and they’re raw and they bring Law a comfort he shouldn’t crave.
But he does, he craves it like no other. And hearing your revelation solidifies it.
Law isn’t leaving this country without you by his side.
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hannieehaee · 10 months
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18+ / mdi
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content: toxicbf!seungcheol, more like possessivebf!seungcheol honestly, he's kinda a dick but not THAT much, jealousy, possessive behavior, afab reader, reader mentioned to be shorter than him, smut, penetrative sex, public sex, oral (m receiving), etc.
wc: 2201
a/n: tysm to the person who requested this <3 i didn't make him super toxic but more possessive and annoying.
masterlist
"shit, baby. you look so good. any plans tonight?" seungcheol hugged you from behind as you stared into the mirror, doing the finishing touches on your hair.
'"what do you mean if i have plans? we're going out. to the monthly meeting with the guys, remember? seokmin's girlfriend said she's coming too"
"hmm? since when? wait, hold on. you're wearing that to dinner with the boys?"
you groaned against him, "you literally just said i looked good. what's the problem?", you already kind of had an idea, but wanted to confirm for some dumb reason.
"yeah, that's when i thought you were going out with the girls or something. do you have to dress like this when you hang out with the guys?"
you knew cheol was a bit on the ... possessive side. he would sometimes be a little too jealous when it came to you being around the guys too much (around any guy, really). despite always confirming to him that you would never look at any of them as more than friends, he would still keep his guard up. it was endearing at times, seeing as it was usually just lighthearted jealousy, but he was doing a really good job at pissing you off right now.
you turned around, now facing him directly, "what's that supposed to mean?"
"baby, cmon! they're guys! and you're ... well, you're you!"
"did you want me to repeat myself or are you actually gonna explain what that's supposed to mean now?"
"listen. you're so beautiful. i had no chance at resisting you when we first met. imagine if i'd met you while you were wearing a tiny little black dress. i would've lost my mind. they're men, baby. they're weak-minded. i dont wanna let them even see you like this." despite the stupid neanderthal logic he was feeding you with, his reasoning gave you a slight ego-boost, dissipating your annoyance a bit.
you approached him, grabbing onto the collar of his shirt as you adjusted his tie - today's theme for the monthly meeting had been strictly formal, courtesy of a hong jisoo – and stared into his eyes, flirtatious smile gracing your lips.
"cheollie ... the dress code's formal. and i know how strict you guys are about that. if you can wear those stupid leather pants on stage while performing for carats, – who, by the way, do wanna fuck you – i can wear a tiny little dress around my very platonic friends."
you were pretty sure seungcheol had tuned you out already, at least judging from how distracted his hands had become now that they were kneading your ass under the short skirt of the dress. in any other circumstances you would've entertained him, maybe even let him fuck you before leaving home, but you weren't about to reward his stupid comments from earlier with sex. separating yourself from him, you chided at him, telling him to get ready, because you'd be leaving together; with no need to change your clothes.
~
upon arriving to the restaurant of choice - an entirely rented out luxury restaurant joshua had seemingly been eyeing for a while - you and a sulky seungcheol (he had brought up the dress issue again in the car) quickly spotted a table full of people. it was all twelve members of seventeen, plus joshua's and seokmin's girlfriends, who would also be making their debut appearance at the monthly dinner. as expected, the boys were all wearing suit and tie, while the girls had dresses on. you had to admit, maybe yours was a bit more provocative, but you felt comfortable since you would only be around close friends.
the moment they spotted you walking in, jeonghan took the liberty of standing up, looking you up and down before smirking and giving you a quick hug, even going as far as pulling out a chair for you to sit. you appreciated the gesture, taking a seat and thanking him, completely ignoring seungcheol's annoyed grumble along the lines of 'i'm supposed to do that'.
the dinner went pretty okay after that, with one or two complimentary comments directed at your apparel. you'd also noticed a few of the boys staring a bit more than usual, but you'd dressed up, after all, so it wasn't very surprising to you. seungcheol, on the other hand, grew more and more annoyed every time a member directed themselves to you, even if it was with innocent intentions. he had built an idea in his head that everyone mustve wanted you the way that he wanted you. it also didn't help that you were sitting right by jeonghan and mingyu, members who were renown for being a bit flirtier than the rest. you knew it was just in their nature, and completely meaningless when directed towards you, but you could feel your boyfriend's fumes increase next to you as the night went on.
after a while seungcheol had begun to speak over you, acting as if you couldn't respond or interact with his members on your own. he was beginning to show his annoyingly possessive side, acting overly overprotective over you, almost as if you were a prize to keep under lock and key.
there were only a few instances in which he did this. he could sometimes act like a dick about it, wanting to show the rest of the guys how you were his and no one else's
then came what broke the camel's back. yoon jeonghan must've sensed some tension in seuncheol's behavior, adding two and two and figuring out that his possessive friend must've been feeling some type of way at any attention headed your way. so, he decided to have fun with it, amping up his flirting.
"shit, have i told you how beautiful you look tonight?," he smirked, eyeing his friend a bit as he complimented you.
"yeah, but maybe don't say that to my girlfriend, yeah?", interjected your stupid boyfriend, hand on your thigh as he attempted to show possession over you.
you ignored him, "oh, thanks hannie. you look really handsome too."
he puffed, as if out of breath, also ignoring cheol's comment, "no, but really. that dress is ... man, all i know is if i were seungcheol we wouldn't have even left the house tonight," the smirk wouldn't leave his face, knowing he was poking a bear.
those two simple comments were enough to get seungcheol to snap, loudly getting up and interrupting any other conversation going on at the table. without any other word, he completely ignored any questioning stares or inquiring comments and grabbed your hand, dragging you from your own chair and pulling you away from the room and into a more secluded area of the almost-empty restaurant.
"seungcheol what the hell are you doing?!"
he turned to you, now letting go of the hand he'd been pulling, "i told you not to wear that around them! do you think i enjoyed that?!"
"it's just jeonghan, cheol! he doesn't mean anything by it. he was just trying to tease you."
"i dont care about that! you're mine. you're not supposed to show yourself off like this to other men!" the fact he didn't see issue with what he was saying was peeving you off, making you scoff at him before he continued.
"you're mine, okay? and you responding to han's flirting is not helping me get that point across to them."
"you-"
"no, let me finish," he moved closer to you the more he spoke, eventually having you pinned against the wall of the restaurant, looking down on you, "i won't have any of them even think they have a chance with you. no one does. you're mine. is that understood?" by now his lips were just a hair away from your ear, heavy breath fanning against you as his hands slid onto your waist, pulling you against him, dick already semi-hard under his slacks.
you hated the way he was talking to you. kind of. an embarrassing part of yourself was keening on his possessiveness, enjoying how he felt as if he had to stake claim over you. as if even one look from another man had him having to show the world you were his and his alone.
when he unglued his lips from your ear and went back to staring down at you, eyes flicking down to your lips, neither of you could help yourselves anymore. you might've kissed him first, but it was probably him who crashed his lips into you first, almost swallowing you whole as he attacked you by shoving his tongue in your mouth.
he became intense with his movements pretty quickly, unbuttoning his pants with one hand while the other harshly felt you up. he disconnected his hand from you for a moment in order to pull down his pants and knead at his cock for a few moments, getting himself ready for you.
he disconnected your lips, chuckling at the way yours chased after his, "get on your knees."
with zero type of dignity, you got on your knees with no question, beginning to slide your hand up and down his dick before wrapping your mouth around his tip and sucking, giving him eyes as you did so.
he groaned at the sight, but quickly recovered, barking out a command for you to be a well-behaved girl and take it all in your mouth. you followed instruction pretty quickly, loving the weight of his cock in your mouth.
"that's it ... knew you could be a good girl after all."
"fuck ... that mouth is all mine, right baby? only for me to choke on my cock .."
"take it deeper, i know you can. trained that pretty mouth to take me."
his words were getting you wetter by the second, moaning mindlessly against his dick as he began to thrust into your mouth, groaning out even more expletives.
he suddenly pulled you away without allowing you to suck him into completion, once more slamming your back against the wall and shoving his tongue in your mouth. you both groaned at the feeling of his taste in your tongue, eventually making the kiss become a mess of wet tongues just licking at one another while he ground his hard dick against you.
you cried against him after a while of dry humping, feeling the heat of his cock so close to where you wanted him, but your mind being too empty for you to even beg for him to put it inside you.
he pulled away, "are you gonna be good and let me have that pretty pussy? my pretty pussy?"
all you could do was nod and whine against him as he pulled your panties aside, only having to lift your dress a tiny bit to give him room to enter your warm walls. you both sighed out in pleasure the moment he entered you, with cheol quickly finding a rhythm that had you throwing your head back against the wall, not caring for any pain you felt at the impact.
"you're mine. do you understand that? no one else can have you. can't even look at you. tell me you understand." he paused for a moment, smirking as he knew you had no way to respond with the pace in which he was slamming himself against you, "what? no answer? baby, what'd i tell you about being a good girl?" he was mocking you now, relishing on the effect he had on you.
"c-cheollie ... y-yours! just yours! won't ev-ever look their way again. pro- ah! promise!" you did the best you could to muster out an answer, being too high on pleasure from the way his cock was repeatedly hitting against you, impaling you completely.
your emotions were already very heightened, causing the two of you to be quick to reach your ends.
"gonna fill you up, okay baby? and you're gonna keep it all in, or else imma have to take you home and do it all over again, yeah?" he groaned out, knowing he was about to blow his load any second now.
"y-yes! fill me up, please!"
a few thrusts later and he was burying his head in the crook of your neck, groaning out at the feeling of your walls tightening against him as you came.
you attempted to catch your breath as seungcheol used his fingers to push in any cum that exited your hole, moving your panties back into place to try and retain the most he could. with no warning, he shoved those same fingers in your mouth, making you suck his essence from them as he groaned at the sight.
"c'mon," he gave you no time to catch your breath or recover before dragging you by the hand once more, walking back to the table to pick up your coats.
"i'm taking her home now. yoon jeonghan, i'll deal with you later," and with that he dragged you away, making no effort to hide your disheveled state as you limped behind him, beyond embarrassed all your friends knew what you and your boyfriend had been up to.
if cheol had wanted to make a public service announcement about how much you were his, he had achieved it.
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kamesama · 9 months
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sukuna and yūji as siblings ( inspired by this post by @nessieartss )
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they are nearly spitting images of one another, but they get gravely offended if someone gets their names mixed up. calling yūji by sukuna's name is always followed by a scowl and his brows wrinkling his skin. sukuna's reaction is the same, making them even more similar. these offences lowered in number after sukuna got his face tattoos, however, they still happen every now and then.
on that note, although they behave differently and have nearly opposite worldviews, there are a couple of gestures that seem to be a shared muscle memory; the way they twist their necks and look at some wandering source of stupidity with the same unimpressed gaze being one of them. of course, they do so in a sync. the way they run their hand through their hair and scratch their head a little when confused. the way they fix their shirt and turn to the side in front of a mirror to judge its fit.
yūji is most definitely subjected to sukuna's insults, but he takes them pretty well; he puts up a fight of his own which sukuna appreciates ( invisibly ). he is happy to know his little brother is resilient. however, there are days where yūji simply cannot stomach the proportions of sukuna's asshole-ry. why are you such a prick?
fights — both verbal and non-verbal, physical and non-physical — are nearly a religious everyday routine. some days it's just sukuna walking by and ruffling yūji's hair as he leaves home, and some days it's a ferocious battle ending with yūji in a headlock because he responded to sukuna's random insult with an exasperated and serious, what the fuck is your problem, dude?
sukuna always ends up having an upper hand.
no one gets to bully sukuna's younger brother — other than him. sure, now when they are older, yūji can handle his own ordeals, but as children, one glare from sukuna was enough to provide salvation for his little brother. sukuna also had a way with their parents to get them out of trouble. how he managed to talk things out with them is beyond yūji even today, but sukuna always saved his ass, walking into crying yūji's room with a confident grin on his face to tell him problem's been solved and he can start kissing his feet.
sukuna found a scrunchie laying around at some point and gave yūji the worst time ever because he teased him so much.
yūji — god bless his wonderful soul — is undoubtedly the more respectful one of the two, unsurprisingly so. that pudding in the fridge that he knows belongs to sukuna? he doesn't touch it. he has no interest in it whatsoever. sukuna, on the other hand, will devour anything and everything he gets his hands on with no regard for ownership. i licked it so it's mine kind of logic. yūji starts hiding his snacks. sukuna nonchalantly finds them.
sukuna busts into yūji's room with nearly no announcement and regard. yūji, on the other hand, always knocks. at some point in the early teenagehood, sukuna's room was a yūji-free zone. no brats allowed. as such, yūji has lesser knowledge of sukuna's room than sukuna has of yūji's.
blackmail. threats. vile words and promises. "brat, give that back or you will never see your vanity fair jennifer lawrence poster again." "*gasp* you wouldn't." "oh, i will."
sukuna finds ways to get certain posters, photos, stickers, merch and absolutely whatever else yūji is dying to have, only to bully the poor boy. "can i see?" "no." "you don't even like that show!" however, these things always find their way onto yūji's desk in the end, or wind up under his bed. when they do, yūji strolls over to sukuna's room with the brightest sun-kissed smile on his precious mouth and expresses his gratitude with the utmost of sincerity and child-like joy. sukuna responds with aloof indifference and a middle finger. it's the tough love.
the times they do get along is when they watch movies together. it's never explicitly admitted, but it has to be their favourite way to spend time in each other's presence. they will binge a show, discuss characters, eat an unhealthy amount of snacks along the way, completely unfazed while someone's guts get clawed out and slurped on screen. horror movies are their forte but yūji successfully got sukuna hooked onto some slice-of-life romance drama here and there. if they are not watching something on some brimming-with-viruses-and-completely-illegal website at home, then they definitely go to the cinema.
the 3 am conversations about life happen. they chew on leftovers of a cold pizza, home alone, under the kitchen light, slowly and calmly commenting on the unyielding passage of time, importance of ambition and drive, and the paradox of life's meaningful meaninglessness. they do so for nine minutes before falling into silence and commenting how stupid that cliff hanger was and how a manga chapter will be delayed again.
yūji's music taste is a spectrum far wider than sukuna's, and although he prefers pop, there are some questionable and edgy songs that seem to crawl their way into his ear because sukuna keeps listening to them on high volume while showering.
surprisingly, yūji is messier than sukuna. both are relatively clean in a way that neither of their rooms resemble a pigsty, but yūji has stray hoodies on his chair or textbooks spread and splattered over his desk ( whether he actually reads them is a separate topic ). sukuna keeps his things relatively neat and leans more towards minimalism in certain aspects.
their styles most definitely clash, but not too drastically; sukuna always seems to wear something of a darker hue to the point yūji strongly questions if he owns something that isn't red, black, white or some shade of grey. on another hand, yūji adores his vivid colours; ugly mustard yellows and pastel pinks and forest greens. sukuna likes his accessories a little edgy but tasteful; yūji finds those to be a hassle because he moves around so much. however, they both seem to show affinity towards comfortable and casual wear.
because of their contrast in terms of dressing, they rarely steal borrow one another's clothes. however, there is a very cool-looking dark blue denim jacket of sukuna's that yūji's got heart eyes for, and every now and then he wears it without having asked for permission. yūji's cheeks are stuffed with his order of burger and french fries when he gets a call from sukuna. he picks up, and all that greets him is a frigid and irritated, brat, did you steal my jacket again? yūji swallows and hangs up.
yūji's socks keep disappearing. it takes him a while to realise it's because sukuna is stealing them, solely because they are made of cotton and comfy.
yūji likes sukuna's phone cases; most of them are dark-ish, sure, but they have this visual effect of elegance that makes the phone look nice. no, sukuna does not give them to his brother. the chambers of his heart are not that vast.
sukuna is more familiar with yūji's friend group than yūji is with sukuna's. he gets along with megumi, enough to acknowledge him as a good friend of his little brother. originally, he teased yūji about nobara, but once he met her, he stopped with a claim that there is zero chemistry between the two and that they're just no fun ( nobara gave him a death glare ). he calls them brats, collectively. on another hand, yūji is not well-versed enough to have a stable opinion of uraume, who seems to be sukuna's partner in crime, but he is very familiar with how irritating his brother finds yorozu who just cannot seem to stop annoying him.
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thank you for reading!
— kamesama.
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captain-hawks · 3 months
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hajime umemiya x reader
c: fluff, pining, brother’s best friend!hajime
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for all that’s changed in your hometown since you moved away to college, some things, it seems, will always stay the same—like your unfortunate affinity for running into hajime umemiya half asleep in your rumpled pajamas in your parents’ kitchen.
it seems impossible, that your older brother’s best friend has somehow grown even more handsome in the three years since you left.
the pictures to be found of him on social media are scarce, his own infrequently-updated feed is nothing more than a showcase of updates on his vegetable garden. but the rare, recent ones you’ve caught from acquaintances—and stared at for far longer than you’ll ever admit—clearly haven’t done him justice.
his mid-20s have done little to change his penchant for pushing his wavy white hair away from his face though, and one rogue lock rests against the prominent scar on his eyebrow. it’s embarrassing, the way your fingers still twitch at your side with the urge to touch it after all this time.
(and it’s even more embarrassing—how long your stupid, lovesick heart has carried a torch for him.)
“fancy seeing you here,” he grins, looking up from where he’s leaning against the counter, scrolling through his phone—likely waiting for your lazy brother to drag himself out of bed.
“hey umemiya,” you chirp, quickly averting your gaze from his blue eyes, heart thundering in your chest as your arm brushes his when you go to open the cabinet beside him.
there’s warmth at your side as he spins, his body nearly caging you in as he casually reaches up to grab the box of cereal your fingers were stretching for. the same kind the two of you always used to sit at the table and eat on mornings like this, when he’d plan something foolish like an early hike with your brother and end up at whims of his terrible sleep schedule.
“hajime,” he says, placing the box down in front of you. running a hand through his hair, he gives you a rueful smile.
your toes curl against the cool floor tiles.
you’ve been on a first-name basis with him for long enough, but it’s always felt too intimate—like the way your lips and tongue move around the syllables will unwittingly serve as a blatant beacon announcing the truth of your pitifully unrequited crush on the man standing next to you.
“hajime,” you repeat softly, heart involuntarily bouncing against your ribcage at the way his eyes crinkle at the corners in response.
the sound of your phone vibrating against the countertop drags your attention away from hajime, but your lips turn downward in annoyance as you see the name that flashes along your screen.
“your brother said you guys broke up,” hajime states casually, eyes darting away from your phone and back to your face after he reads your ex’s name.
“because cheating on me once just wasn’t enough,” you sigh, flicking a button to silence your phone and decline the call. the joys of a long-distance relationship with your lame high school-turned-college boyfriend.
“i wish he would have let me kick his ass after the first time,” hajime crosses his arms, brows furrowing.
warmth unfurls in your gut, and you tilt your head to the side in confusion, “how’d you know about that?”
he scratches the back of his head a bit sheepishly and then shrugs. “i may have asked your brother what was up when you stopped posting pictures with him for a little while last year.”
there are too many variables and factors bouncing around in your sleep-addled brain to find the sum of all these parts, logic slipping through your fingers like the honey-sweet feeling dripping down your spine and coating your nerves.
don’t be ridiculous.
“you could’ve just asked me,” you nudge his foot, feeling a little bold, like you can blame your uncharacteristic forwardness on exhaustion.
he mirrors the motion, then briefly catches the back of your ankle against his. “you changed your number.”
you did, after losing your old phone, though you hadn’t quite felt bold enough to message hajime on social media out of the blue to share your new number. your brother was always the proxy between the two of you, after all.
unlocking your phone, you hand it to him, suppressing the subtle shudder that runs down your spine when his fingers brush across your own. his lips quirk upward as he types, holding your phone out to you a moment later, only to snatch it back, reaching a hand out to pull you beside him.
with one arm wrapped around your shoulders, he finds his way to the instagram app, both of your faces popping up on the screen as he flicks to a story post.
“i just woke up!” you protest, like your legs aren’t threatening to give out under you.
he leans closer to you, the gentle scent of his shampoo leaving you dizzy on the inhale, a lock of his hair tickling your face.
“you look cute like this,” he grins, choking out a laugh when you pinch his side.
he snaps the photo and quickly clicks the post button. then he lets you go just as fast, like you’re not prickling with heat from head to toe, though you still find your shoulder flush with his when you lean back against the counter beside him.
opening the post, you have to stifle the sound that dances eagerly against your closed lips. the picture makes your heart lurch—his eyes are crinkled shut in laughter, his face turned slightly into yours, your smile bright.
he leans into you a little more, looking down at the picture with you, tapping the side of his foot against yours.
“he’s probably checking your posts,” he shrugs, eyes sparkling with mirth and something else you can’t quite identify.
“umeeee,” your brother’s tired voice interrupts you as he slinks into the kitchen, fully dressed—though his t-shirt’s clearly on backward, and his hair looks like he lost a fight with his pillow.
hajime pushes up off of the counter, fingertips skirting against your forearm in the whisper of a touch as he turns back to you before leaving and grins, softly murmuring, “text me sometime.”
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blasphemecel · 3 months
Text
Michael Kaiser — Nervous Like a Bad Dog
PAIRING: Michael Kaiser/Reader WORD COUNT: 0.9k TYPE: Humor, Fluff (debatable), Early relationship WARNING(S): tw Kaiser, tw AWKWARD
You are taunting him.
This is an offense Kaiser considers very grave. Of course you’ve done it before and often to his face, and it can be fun in a way like a fake chase where the victim knows they’re not in any real danger (maybe the word is ‘playful’ even though both of you get foul with it), but this kind of mockery is degrading. You’re not doing it on purpose, which makes it an act of second nature. And that means it's unforgivable.
“I hate this corny ass movie.” You gesture at the screen. “Wish they’d scream more, also.”
“You said you wanted to watch it,” murmurs Kaiser, not really giving a fuck considering he’s not even paying attention to the movie. His gaze is fixated on your hand, now far away from his again. Just when his skin was about to brush against yours and he was mentally congratulating himself for his discretion, you pulled away in such a blithe manner. All that straining for nothing.
“Well it sounded entertaining like, in a bad way, but it’s just boring. Also the religious themes are so superficial and edgy, you can’t even laugh. I think they should’ve been Amish. At least that would’ve been funny.”
You shift, settling your hand back over the couch. Kaiser wishes you were a little closer, though at least he can resume the hand holding mission, inching his fingers towards yours again. The physical response to what he’s attempting is embarrassing. With every advance his heart races harder, and his palms are sweaty, and it’s just fucking ridiculous. He can imagine your skin under his, almost tangible.
Technique-wise it’s not complicated. Despite the amount he’s tensing up, Kaiser understands, logically, that he’s making a mountain out of a molehill. But it is a tender gesture and Kaiser doesn’t know how to be gentle or sweet. Softness is alien to him. There is a certain light he needs you to see him in, to come off as suave and charming. It has to be perfect and smooth and like he’s done it thousands of times before, even though now will be the first. And you will swoon over him also, he’ll make sure of it.
Almost there, he’s about to grasp your hand in his, holy shit-
“Micha, are you even paying attention?” You adjust your position again, pulling it away completely as you recline on your side against the armrest. “I thought a pretentious snob like you would have more critiques to make?”
“The movie’s so shitty it has rendered me speechless,” he says. It comes out easy and natural enough, but his blood is boiling. Can you not sit still for more than a second?! This was the seventh time!
“Fair enough,” you reply, eyes still glued to the screen.
You’re teasing him, aren’t you? Otherwise how would it happen so much? You think messing with him is funny??? Exploiting his moment of weakness and faltering?!
Kaiser smirks (at nothing; the gesture is pointless since you’re not even looking at him and entirely performative for himself). As if you’ll get the better of him. Maybe more drastic measures are in order.
He starts scooting closer. You’re still bitching about the movie and with how slow he’s moving, he doubts you’re noticing him closing in on you, and even if you are you’re choosing to feign ignorance to it in your transparent attempts at belittling him. Well, that’s the way he’s perceiving your behavior, anyway, as a personal slight against him.
His arm is about to reach you, will reach you, wrap around you. He’s going to embrace you soon. Heart thumping away in his chest, Kaiser realizes his throat is dry all of a sudden when he swallows, but it’s going to happen-
You stand up and head to the bathroom without a second glance in his direction.
Kaiser sits there frozen in whatever position he was in mid-movement before your betrayal, jaw hanging open, and he realizes he must look like a stupid buffoon at the moment. He is livid, however. How dare you!? When he grits his teeth, it hurts a little.
After assuming a more acceptable and casual stance, he heeds the tv, finally. Some girl tries to drown the main character, but ends up dying of a head injury instead somehow and then some other bullshit starts happening.
Wow. You weren’t kidding, this movie is fucking garbage. It almost distracts him from his predicament.
You return and sit back down next to him all relaxed like you haven’t been actively giving him an uptick in cortisol and adrenaline. Do you think this is a game? It’s as if you can’t even tell you’re dealing him psychic damage — playing innocent and oblivious to your transgressions. What a cunning pretense that is.
Kaiser… grabs your hand and tugs it. And stares at you straight on. It’s kind of unnerving and intense for no reason.
You raise your eyebrows at him as if he’s being strange, this confused expression on your face. “Why are you squeezing so hard? I value my blood circulation, you know?”
Eye twitching, he corrects his grip to a proper, more sensible one, lacing your fingers together. You do not understand what his deal is. Kaiser says, “This will be the best hand holding of your fucking life even if it’s the last thing I do.”
… What.
Unable to help yourself, you burst out laughing. “You’re so odd, Micha.”
___
POV you wanted to have a date but your boyfriend is perpetually mentally stuck in his own version of silent hill
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direquail · 10 months
Text
You know the point of "protecting the children" dogwhistles, right? It's a reference to the idea that all queer people are child abusers. Super common belief among homophobes and transphobes, including (sometimes especially) gay ones.
It's also not just "a dogwhistle". When pressed to explain what exactly they want to protect children from, it's a ready-made emotional appeal to something that has broad social support. Most people, even if they don't like being around kids, are also not pro-child abuse. That's why conservatives go out of their way to invent (even if it's completely fictional) "reasons" why acceptance of gay and trans people amounts to child abuse. It helps them create an emotional connection with their target audience, and can be leveraged into logically ridiculous arguments like "well, if you don't agree with my platform, you must be pro child abuse, because I'm on the side of The Children".
"Protecting the children" is also super appealing to parents in particular, not because all parents are secretly authoritarians, but because it's super common to have a child and realize "Oh shit, I brought this person who can't defend themselves into the world and the world kind of sucks", and to feel horribly, horribly inadequate in the face of that.
I get very tired of people who mock, scorn, and ridicule people for falling for these rhetorical traps, or being snared by something that seems common-sense but disguises something ugly underneath. They are traps. That is what they're meant to be. That is why there are gay people who fall for anti-queer rhetoric, and get pulled into exclusionist or violently reactionary circles. We all have things we are vulnerable to, whether that is a history of being abused or a deep fear that we cannot protect our own children, who we brought into the world and are responsible for the protection of. And we gain nothing by mocking the latter.
I'm sure it makes some people feel great to say "well if you were really who you claim to be, you wouldn't fall for this shit", but frankly, that's a stupid-ass take. It misses entirely that these messages are carefully crafted by the people who hate us! They workshop these statements! They spend months or years trying to find the right message and when they find it they use the hell out of it, because it works. Because they are listening to the public conversations people are having online, and it doesn't take any level of basic agreement to be capable of regurgitating the party line word-for-word.
I am so sick of people who look at a deeply-embedded struggle over social and political ideals and think that this fight won't demand our whole brains and hearts and souls and yeah, we might fuck up because we care deeply and sometimes, people with bad intentions prey on that. On our grief and our fear and our rage.
And I'm frankly a lot more nervous around people who refuse to be aware of that, especially when they loudly mock the people who are willing to acknowledge their own fallibility and explore how they got ensnared in something. People are not moral machines, they are people.
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cookierunauprompts · 8 months
Note
I just had a crazy idea: Shadow Milk Cookie imitating Reader Cookie as soon as he sees them.
Imagine: He comes out of his prison, everyone is shaking in fear, and then he starts scanning everyone until his eyes land on Reader Cookie and he just goes "I'mma turn into them and mess around for a while!". Then Reader Cookie feels flabbergasted/intimidated and starts fearing the worst.
In short, Shadow Milk with shapeshifting powers!
i'll do you one better, he goes after everyone's knees/hj
Requested Prompts #20 - 💓♪
You watched on as the formerly imprisoned beast shapeshifted into each of your friends, picking out a thing or two to mock them for before going on to the next. A few of your highlights of the moment were when he went after Wizard Cookie for his height(literally just turning into a taller version of Wizard Cookie), and of course, him going after the fact that Pure Vanilla keeps on trying to sacrifice himself despite the fact the world still needs him. And then, of course, he got to you. " And then there's you," Shadow Milk Cookie began, turning back to his regular form. He grabbed you by the chin, staring right into your eyes. Unfortunately he cut you off before you could ask your stupid ass question you were thinking of. " What even are you? You're a constantly shifting blob of flavor and appearance, there's literally no logical or magical explanation for that!" He let go of your chin, throwing his arms up into the air. " I mean seriously! It feels like I'm talking to a bunch of different people at once yet also just one at the same time! What the hell is up with that?" He ranted. You took joy in seeing Cookie's who could see glimpse of your true form's confusion, it had been like that with all the other ancients alongside moonlight cookie. But in all seriousness... you were probably some kind of eldritch horror condensed into a cookie. " Yeah, uh, they're just like that. Apparently." White Lily spoke up, recovering from the emotion damage she'd taken. " Really?" Shadow Milk looked at you with suspicion, and you nodded your head to confirm White Lily's words. " Huh." He eventually said, looking back to his front yet not looking at anyone. " ... That's kind of hot actually-" He immediately gets smote by the guardian strike.
TLDR ; Reader is an eldritch horror probably.
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moonshynecybin · 4 months
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okay i'm sorry for this but. you mentioning marc crying + showing hole on ig at the same time made me think. he would so be an overstimulation kinda crier.
he literally is thank you so much. genuinely before AND after reconciliation it’s like. he is genuinely crying by the time vale gets inside him. ummmmmm this got lawng. under the cut !
EYE think. marc has this insane ability to have this vice grip handle on his body and his reactions to physical input thereof… high pain tolerance high pleasure tolerance i would wager. think about how clear headed he is on track despite an INSANE amount of sensation and physical input and adrenaline… like it all speaks to his freak ass nature. you can’t just turn that shit off !!
SO it’s fun for MEEE to take that to its logical conclusion. sex with vale valentino rossi. where (at the beginning especially) he’s starstruck and responsive and sweet, but he’s also very clearly still ALL there. no getting lost in the hedonistic haze for marc— instead he’s absolutely DIALED IN on vale, cataloging information like a crazy person. he’s like. vale likes it when i move my hips like X and i incorporate more tongue here and just. trying to win at sex. make it good for vale make it good overall (ITS ALREADY INSANE MIND YOU). trying to get a good grade in fucking vale trying to WIN ! and i think it results creating a little competitive streak in vale where he NOTICES and. well he wants to make marc absolutely lose his god damn mind. and it’s not ONLY as a “winning at sex” kind of thing (trust that is at play. the crazy ego of getting there— the desire to see this hyper, neurotic, COMPETITIVE (a RIVAL. the fastest guy on track even !) guy CHILL OUT), it’s also coupled with grade A 100% pure and earnest horniness. crucially. it bothers him that his baseline effort gets marc there but doesn’t make him LOSE HIS MIND!! BEST HE EVER HAD!! crazy possessive streak he ABSOLUTELY doesn’t quite understand… he wants him to not be able to SPEAK… he wants the only thing swimming around in marc’s little intelligent fucked up noggin to be VALENTINO ROSSI in bright flashing letters… so. he sets about achieving that goal with typical rakish whimsy
so they fuck normal style and marc comes and it’s Good (knee wobbly) and he’s laughing like. jajaja okay now i will take a shower :3 and he’s got one knee off the bed stupid blue underwear in hand looking ENTIRELY too unruffled for someone who just got their back blown out by THEE valentino rossi… ass insane abs go crazy hair all over the place flush on his cheeks… just casually LEAVING the bed while vale’s still strung out breathing hard all sweaty from fucking and tangled in sheets lounging like a roman emperor. and that’s when the irritation meets competitiveness meets horny and some neuron fires in vale’s head and the switch FLIPS. and vale catches marc by the wrist. pulls him back. flips him against the mattress gets a thumb under his knee. marc shivers mouth like :o vale slings his legs over his shoulderssssssssss and he gets to WORK.
genuinely vale like. sorry nasty zone. getting him off as many times as humanely possible. relentless. fingers him blows him fucks him then eats his own come out of his hole absolutely NASTY. hickies on thighs thumbs on his nipple. marc doesn’t even know what to DO with all of it… and marc can handle a lot of sensation he LIKES a lot of sensation…. the things that would be WAY too much for normal people are justttt enough for our boy marc marquez… but his knees were jello forty minutes ago and vale’s got two fingers tugging on the oversensitive rim of his hole and his tongue is playing slick on the underside of his cock and vale’s STARING at him blue eyes clear and lasered in… and vale takes his other hand and presses his fingers, feather light against the outside of marc’s thigh, a caress, and marc is coming and his breath is catching and tears are hitting the light in the corner of his eyes like he’s an old hollywood star and he’s SO overwhelmed and loving it SO much and his head is EMPTY and he has maybe the most insane orgasm of his life. shoots all over his chest with a cracked open sob hands white knuckled on vale’s shoulders….. doesn’t leave the bed for ten full hours after that….
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tokyo-debunker-idk · 3 months
Text
Crushed | 03
Summary: He's tried to convince Leo that you're a cool person, to which the former just scoffs and accuses Sho of having a crush. Honestly, the reaction is obnoxious – people of the opposite sex are perfectly able to have platonic friendships. Just because Sho's taken to bringing an extra lunch for you on training days so you can eat together after, and he enjoys spending time with you, and you're pretty and smell good even after an hour of sparring, doesn't mean he has a crush.
Pairing: Haizono Sho x Reader x Kurosagi Leo
Genre: Humor, romantic comedy, slowish burn, no real plot, Leo bullying
18+, minors DNI
~~~~~
"Besides, what are a few nobodies compared to the shit you've been dealing with anyway? You can handle it."
You finally realize what's been bothering you since you confronted Leo at the Vagastrom dorms (outside of the usual annoyance of Leo's general existence).
His response, despite his condescending tone… had been worded suspiciously like a compliment. Which, since it's Leo, means it probably wasn't.
"YoU cAn hAndLe iT," you mutter quietly to yourself, imitating the TikTok asshole's haughty tone. "Fuck off."
It makes you even more annoyed about the stupid sympathy that flared up when Leo mentioned death threats. He doesn't deserve your consideration, but your empathetic ass doesn't care about logical little details like that.
Sure, you've seen horrible comments and exchanges online in fan wars, but it's always been as a spectator. Receiving such disturbing messages personally, ranging from unhinged fans who call you ugly (whatever) to those that wish vile things upon you (less whatever) to others that send inappropriate pictures you wish you could unsee (your eyes, your poor non-quite-virgin eyes)… it's affected you much more than you would have expected.
For you it's mostly a weird blip in your life, and you can just deactivate an account you rarely used in the first place. Since you're stuck at Darkwick, it's not like your social life in the "real" world is exactly popping off, anyway. Despite logically knowing that nothing will happen to you, that the vitriol is being spewed by complete strangers who don't know you at all, you still feel shaken at the reminder that regular humans can be even worse than many of the anomalies you've experienced.
Even the sparse comments about you being cute together (which are repulsive in their own way, for obvious reasons) feel weird and invasive, as if you're their friend. It's like they think they know you, and that their opinion matters enough for you to hear it.
Leo deals with all of that constantly? Sure, he basically signed up for it and is apparently completely fine, but it still just… doesn't feel right.
Yeah, you dislike him, but he's not exactly evil. He's a douche who cares more about himself than anyone else, which is not a rare trait in the world. He just also happens to have brains and guts, without the morals that would keep him from using those around him.
So, a shitty guy, but not the absolute worst. At least, not evil enough for the insane hostility you received firsthand.
Then again, he's gotten those types of messages and was more than willing to put you in the line of fire. So maybe he is a little evil.
Why did he even post you to his TikTok as his girlfriend, anyway? For all his apparent dismissiveness of your capabilities, the guy is definitely way too vain to choose any random passerby, even if he later reveals it to be a joke. In its own fucked up little way, it's almost a compliment that he seems to think you're objectively attractive enough to be a believable partner to his audience.
Not that you're flattered.
Well… a small, petty part of you kind of is, because while Leo acts like a steaming pile of garbage, he's a steaming pile of garbage with taste.
Huh, then maybe he did actually mean what he said about you being able to handle it?
Nah, that can't be right.
Whatever. You have more important things to worry about than a toxic, twink-shaped gremlin. Like your new assignment with the Jabberwock ghouls. That should be your current number-one priority. You should probably go over the investigation notes right now, actually.
SHOulders: Hey Y/N, u free?
You're a strong independent woman who can prioritize important, life-altering tasks over silly crushes. You are, you can resist–
You: Yeah! What's up?
~~~~~
"So? What do you think of the sign?"
"It's amazing! It's even more impressive than it was in the photo."
Sho grins at your compliments, though he tries not to show just how pleased he is about your heartfelt praise.
"Didn't I say flattery'll get you nowhere?"
He's lying, of course. Flattery from you is always welcome, because he can tell you mean it. It's also why he's asked you to look at his menu and signboard before officializing the food truck – you'll give him your honest thoughts. Leo would have opinions on things that are trending, but Sho doesn't really want to rely on gimmicks. For all his irritation with the restrictions at Darkwick (and having to deal with his annoying ass brother), this food truck is something he's actually excited about.
Sho doesn't tend to take most things seriously… he's naturally intelligent and athletic, so he's never really had to try hard to get by. Not wanting anything badly means he'll never be disappointed if something doesn't pan out. Besides, Leo's the type of best friend to make fun of any endeavor or interest he doesn't deem worthy.
But you're different.
You work so hard every day to make up for the qualities you believe you lack, from struggling through workouts to staying up late to catch up on the classwork you miss due to being sent on missions. Maybe once he would have scoffed at your efforts, but instead, it gives him the courage to try something new.
It's safe to show you how much the food truck actually means to him. You're the one who constantly raves about his food, whose encouragement and support has helped his tiny idea grow into an actual dream. He trusts you.
"Do you have a date?"
Huh? A date for what? Why do you want to know about his love life? Or is this your way of asking him to –
You hand back the menu you were looking at, and Sho realizes you mean for his food truck opening.
Right. Thank goodness, because you guys have a good friendship that does not need to be complicated by anything like that.
"By next week, I guess? So long as no one gets in my way."
"I'm really looking forward to it!"
Yeah, the sensation in his chest is most definitely relief, not disappointment.
~~~~~
"What are you doing here?"
"Hello to you too, Kurokawa," you reply drily as you put down your heavy bag, unsurprised by Leo's unwelcoming greeting. He's lounging on a couch in the common area, and you suppress an internal sigh.
It's not surprising to run into him at the Vagastrom dorm, but you had hoped he was out turning princes into frogs, forcing poor parents to exchange their firstborn for vegetables, or whatever it is he does for fun.
"It's Kurosagi."
You ignore his correction, because you know it pisses him off.
You sometimes wonder why Sho bothers with Leo when you've never seen Leo do anything nice for his so-called best friend, but it's not your place to judge. You're mature enough to understand that there's a history there you're not aware of, and that you've only known them for a very short period of time.
"Maybe I'm here to see my darling influencer boyfriend," you say sarcastically, giving him the fakest smile you can manage as you plop down next to him. You know he doesn't like you, so it's another easy way to annoy him (if at your own expense). "How could I go a day without seeing that pretty face?"
You're mature enough to understand. That doesn't mean you're mature enough to not hate it. If you can't avoid Leo, you're going to do your best to be as annoying as possible when you do have to interact with him.
"Ugh, don't sit so close," Leo grumbles, despite not making a single move to move away like the lazy little princess he is. He does smell nice though, probably some trendy cologne that he uses to cover up the stench of his rotten personality. "Have you even showered today?"
Wow. You know you smell nice because you did, in fact, shower today. Right before coming here, to be exact, because despite Sho's knowledge of your sweaty form after training sessions, you want his memories to be of you fresh and perfumed.
There is really no need for Leo to be so fucking rude all the fucking time. Especially when you've done nothing to deserve it but apparently have the audacity to exist in his presence. If anything, you've been downright charitable in never bringing up "the incident" at the Pit. Though if you're being honest, it's also something you don't want to remember, because the knowledge that you willingly ground up against his dick – even if it was out of spite – is too embarrassing to think about.
Sure, he's pretty, but you have your standards.
Why are you even thinking about this right now? Clearly you have been spending way too much time either studying, doing odd jobs for the ghouls, and daydreaming about Sho if you're even thinking of Leo in any sexual-adjacent light. You don't even really want to think about him at all.
You know that being ignored is one of the things that bothers him most of all (an attention-seeking diva, truly), so you grab a textbook out of your bag and begin to read.
~~~~~
Leo knows he's an asshole.
He's perfectly fine with it. Sometimes, it even sparks joy.
Such as now, when you're scowling at him in a way that makes him want to antagonize you even further. You're always so nice and friendly to everyone that it's satisfying to be the one to elicit a different reaction out of you. It's a matter of pride that he's the only one that can make you lose your temper.
Besides, it's not his fault you look so cute when you're pissed off.
Leo freezes when he realizes what just crossed his mind, but before he can figure out exactly where that ridiculous thought came from, you're pulling a textbook out of your bag.
… Are you seriously about to study while sitting so close to Leo he can smell your flowery shampoo?
"Can I help you, Kurohagi?"
His eyebrow twitches, and he realizes he's been staring at you. And that you fucked up his last name, again.
"You're getting very comfortable, aren't you?" he replies in a scornfully, wondering why exactly you're even visiting when Leo's the only one here.
Unless… you came to see him. Maybe you're just playing it off as if you weren't, to save face. Why else would you even sit so close to him, anyway?
"I'm just waiting for Sho to get back, he said he'd be here soon," you reply with a shrug that annoys Leo for reasons he can't explain. Your answer makes far more sense, and yet that just pisses him off even more. So he does what he does best.
"It's cute how you're being such a good little gofer for Sho," he says mildly, pretending not to care one way or the other. "He's always been good at getting people to do things for him."
You stiffen, and uncertainty flits across your face before you straighten your expression. Though you're obviously trying to hide it, the way you shift away from him reveals that he hit a nerve.
It was exactly what he was going for, but the usual satisfaction feels hollow, as if the words have left a bitter aftertaste in his mouth. You don't snap back with your usual fire the way he expected. Instead you just look back at your book, and the sour feeling magnifies.
An oppressive silence blankets the two of you while unfamiliar pressure weighs down his chest, and Leo is almost relieved when the tell-tale sound of a rumbling engine signals Sho's arrival.
His friend's face brightens instantly when his eyes land on you, which irritates Leo in a way he can't explain. You smile back, though it's more subdued than usual.
"I brought the rest of the stuff from the diner," you call out, and the way Sho jogs to greet you seems to restore some of the sparkle in your eyes. It does not alleviate some of the heaviness Leo is feeling.
"Awesome, thanks," Sho replies with a grin. "You know you didn't have to, right?"
"Yeah, but I wanted to."
Barf. Are you guys fucking serious? It's nauseating, the way Sho is smiling at you like a lovesick puppy. Does he have no pride at all?
"Oh, Leo," Sho calls. Great, he's finally been noticed.
"What?" Leo replies a little petulantly, crossing his arms. Everything about this situation is pissing him off, and he doesn't even understand why.
"Stop pouting and help me out, I was able to pick up some liquor when I went on my grocery run."
"Ugh, fine," he grumbles, mollified by the promise of a night of drinking. It's sadly the closest they can get to clubbing when Darkwick watches their every move.
Leo stands to help grab some of Sho's bags and notices that you're hanging back with an uncertain look on your face. Are you stupid enough to actually take Leo's words to heart when it's obvious you have his best friend wrapped around your pretty little finger?
"Are you coming or not?" he asks testily, shoving a few bags in your direction. "We're not sharing if you don't help."
Your eyes widen at the implied invitation, and even Sho makes a sound of surprise.
"I… uh… yeah," you stammer, hurrying up from the couch to take the bag Leo is holding out. "Thanks?"
You still look and sound confused, but the smile you give him is genuine. It's the first time he's been on the receiving end of that particular expression of yours, and sunlight eases the uncomfortable feeling in his chest. It's similarly disconcerting, and Leo has no idea what to make of it.
"Whatever, just hurry up."
~~~~~
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Grease Lightning
Pairing: Buck x Reader
Word count: 1.3k
Notes: This has been in my box for forever and I’m sorry it took so long to write
Warnings: A panic attack is implied
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Every day since the accident you’ve watched Buck like a hawk. 
You stare at him while he eats his cereal, telling you how excited he is to see Eddie like a kid going to school to see their best friend. 
You stare when he’s on the couch playing games with Chris and Eddie has his arms around you because he’s staring for the same reason. 
And you stare when he’s lying in bed next to you, staring right back into your eyes. He reaches out, pushing a piece of hair out of your face, giving you a little smile. 
“I’m okay” He whispers every night, his heart crumbling when he watches little tears flow down your cheeks as you nod slowly. 
It’s funny because you’ve gotten better, he used to have to hold you until you cried yourself to sleep, you’d wake up every morning and he’d be practically lying on top of you, just so you could feel the warmth of his body, the beating of his heart. So you knew he was alive as soon as you woke up. He didn’t mind the extra pampering, because he knew you needed it. You packed his stupid paw patrol lunch box every day with his snacks because you knew Bobby had every meal covered. You drove him to work now, usually, you’d take your bike places but it was Buck who suggested you bring him to work to spend more time together and so you’d have a car all day, he didn’t mind not having it. 
It was all honestly mostly so he could keep an eye on you too. Eddie would ask in hushed tones how you were doing and Buck would nearly crumble each time because he was just so worried about you. 
You weren’t even sure the last time you’d had a nightmare about what had happened, therapy had been a huge help, teaching you ways to cope with the intense anxiety that something that freaking rare could happen again. Final destination your ass. But you already knew tonight was going to be kind of shitty. You’d woken up that morning, turning over and reaching for him to steal his body heat, when your hand was met with nothing but sheets, cool to the touch. Your eyes shot open, his phone wasn’t on the nightstand. 
“Buck?” You say quietly, your heart beating wildly in your chest. You scramble out of bed, and hurry down the stairs, looking around the apartment. 
“Buck?? Evan??” You call out louder, and there’s still no answer. The logical thing would be to just call him. But rationality doesn’t always come when we need it to. 
You wrap your arms around yourself, slowly sinking to the floor. Your hands are shaking way too much to even dial his number in the first place. You can feel the edges of your mind slowly fraying, your heartbeat seems to be slowing down, it’s like you can’t feel anything at all. What if he didn’t even answer you? What if he couldn’t answer you?
“C-call Eddie” You managed to choke out as you sank further and further into yourself and into this strange black hole. The phone rings and rings and rings and you’re not even sure when he answered but you can just barely hear him calling your name. He calls out your name again and you’re still not answering him. But he can hear you, he can hear the hyperventilating. You think he tells you they’ll be home as soon as they can and that it’s gonna be okay and he’s going to stay on the line with you and you just shrug in response to him because talking is not a thing you’re capable of right now. 
The front door slams open and Buck comes running over. He pulls you into his arms and kisses your head, holding you as tightly to his chest as you can stand it. 
“Hey, hey it’s okay now I’m here, just breathe baby I’m here” He strokes your hair as Eddie comes over, sitting down on the floor a little ways away from you two. He puts his head in his hands and sighs before looking up. Buck adjusts you in his lap and rubs your thigh slowly. 
“Can you tell me what happened?” He asks quietly and you shake your head, your body relaxing against his? 
“I have an idea,” Eddie says quietly and you bury your face further into his chest as Buck looks over at him. 
“You’re not really here” 
Suddenly you’re on the floor, no longer in his arms. You look around you, and Eddie is standing over you, with Buck’s limp body in his arms. 
“I’m sorry” He choked out as he fell to his knees “I-I’m so- I’m so sorry” 
“No, no please no Buck no” Your voice cracks as you scramble over to his body, hugging him to your chest “Buck please!” You sob “Evan please I love you, please” 
“Y/N? Hey, Y/N come on wake up” You slam forward in the bed and Buck shrieks, throwing his hands up in little fake karate motions. 
“What are you doing?!” You gesture at him wildly and he scoffs 
“What am I doing?? What are you doing?!! You- You were crying for me” He sighs softly, putting his hands down. “ You were crying and telling me you loved me” 
He sits back down next to you, fixing the covers around his waist, and sighs, running his hands through his hair and looking over at you.
“Another bad dream?” He asks quietly and you nod. He opens his arms and you crawl into his lap, clinging to his arm. He wraps them around you, kisses your head, and sets his chin down on it.
“Haven’t had one in a while… Almost thought you weren’t worried about me anymore, thought there was another man” 
You snort and pinch his arm and he bats your hand away.
“I’m for real life! What if you found another super sexy ultra mega hottie firefighter boyfriend?”
“Ultra mega hottie?” You giggle into his chest and he smacks your butt. You yelp and he snickers again.
“Hell yeah!…who else would you want to get engaged to?” He says the last part so quietly you almost question if you even heard it. You look up at him and he reaches over into the nightstand and pulls out a small velvet box. 
“I will always be here to save you, Y/N… You’ll never be able to get rid of me. Even lightning couldn’t do it!!” 
You laugh a little through the tears and he helps out sit up, opening the little box.
“This is not exactly the proposal I had in mind… actually Eddie is helping me set it up so you gotta pretend to be surprised okay?”
“Okay,” you nod slowly, gulping quietly and now crying for a completely different reason. The ring is gorgeous. It’s everything you’d wanted and you knew he had definitely been sneaking around on your Pinterest boards. He slips it on your finger and you stare at it, your heart pounding in your ears. 
“I love you, Y/N” He tilts your chin up and you smile, your heart no longer aching with the pain of imagining him gone. Because he’s here, right now at this moment your Buck is here and he’s alive and he’s beautiful and he’s here.
“I love you too” 
He leans in brushing his lips softly against yours and nuzzling your nose, grinning when you giggle. He cups your face, trailing his thumb over your cheekbone before planting a soft, lingering kiss on your lips. He exhales slowly and you smile, moving your lips against his. He closes the box and puts it back on his nightstand before pushing you back slowly with his body, never parting from the kiss. Your legs open to welcome him and he settles down between them, growling playfully. 
“Why future Mrs. Buckley” He pulls away a little to look at you “Are you propositioning me?” 
“Oh shut up!” You squeal laughing as he pulls your oversized shirt up and crawls under it
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lifewithdavefarts · 2 months
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DaveFarts - Episode 32 “A Worthy Opponent” [Episode List] Dave is back at the warehouse and filming another short “fart porn” clip for Greg. As he keeps blasting Tom, his co-worker and fart sniffer, a masked man steps into the set…
Greatly influenced by this suggestion.
Reminder: Tom was introduced in Episode 14.
POV: Dave
Alright, just like I did last time, it’s all good.
Getting paid to fart in someone’s face? Easiest money I’ll ever make in my life.
My friend Greg, the wannabe movie director, wanted me for another fart porn film.
Yes, that’s an actual thing, this is my life now… a small part of it at least.
You know me, I’m a chill dude, though before accepting such task some months ago I wanted to make sure there were some lines that we shouldn’t cross. To be honest, however, the more I worked with Greg, the more I got used to all of this gross kinky stuff.
I mean, that sounds hypocrite, I’m aware: I’m an incredibly skilled straight farter who continuously face-farts his friend and roommate, fully knowing the he has a fart fetish, and even before that I’ve always been a proud farter, and rightfully so.
Also, I spend too much time on the Internet, so I’m well-versed in gross stuff.
With Tim, however, it’s different.
Here there are cameras, people telling me how I need to fart (seriously!), people I barely know but, truth to be told, who gives a shit? It’s just business, a business that revolves about farting, so you could say that my ass shits gold, almost literally.
Plus, I already got a Tim in my fart-victim collection: a Tom always sounded like the next logical step, the next Infinity Sniffer. You can starting calling me Thanus at this point.
So here I am, back at the warehouse, in this fake living room, wearing a pair of shabby grey sweatpants, cautiously sitting on Tom’s face. 
Tom, my co-worker and professional fart sniffer.
He was lying on this couch in the middle of the set, face up, his nose perfectly aligned with my asscheeks already.
He didn’t say a word or move a muscle: this guy is a pro for real. I still don’t know if he actually has a fart kink or not. What I do know is that I did blast him even when we weren’t working once. 
What can I say? My farts are too good to be wasted!
As of now, I sat on him and adjusted my position, spreading my legs wide, to ease the next fart out and, according to the script, “to showoff my manly bulge”. Thanks, I guess?
I lean just a bit and I effortlessly rip the first fart of the session, a natural blast I’ve been brewing for a couple of minutes. The warm gas passed through the fabric of my sweatpants and soon Tom’s face was imbued with my poisonous flatulence.
“Fuck yeah.” I said, as the loud blast kept going. “Don’t choke on that you fag.”
Hey, I didn’t write the script!
I could feel and hear Tom taking deep whiffs of that fart. I wiggled my ass in response, an improv which he seemed to enjoy, both professionally and… kinkly?
This blast lasted around 6 seconds. A good one don’t get me wrong… but you know what I’m truly capable of…
I noticed Greg from behind the camera giving me a thumbs up, mouthing my next line.
“Alright you filthy slave, you better open up.”
Tom obeyed. I leaned once again and spread my legs even wider, my anus aligning with my co-worker’s mouth.
Another home-run, another loud fart, I didn’t even need to push that much. I’m ridiculously good at this, I swear. It feels stupid to brag about farting skills but trust me, as soon as I finish ripping one of my huge farts, my body is already brewing the next one. I got a quick reload.
Tom’s face was shaking and this time, for real, he almost choked on my gas, as I felt him move. And when even Tom, who’s usually stone-cold while working, flinches, I know I did a good job.
I saw Greg talking to his assistant: he seemed angry. In that moment, behind me, the fake door of the fake living room opened without warning. Was this an unscripted moment?
I stopped farting and turned around, kind of forgetting that I was sitting on Tom’s face.
Someone stepped into the set, another man, around my age, tall and skinny. I couldn’t see his face as he was wearing some kind of black ski mask. His clothes were as casual as mine (a red t-shirt and a pair of blue skinny jeans).
He didn’t look friendly, yet the moment he saw me, he kind of froze on the spot for a few moments.
Is Greg making a farter-slasher movie all of the sudden? Not that I’d complain! Sounds camp-y enough to me.
I gave an inquisitive look to my director-friend, who promptly stopped filming.
“C-cut!” he yelled. “Alright, we got our first farts.” he said, as he walked towards me. “N-now, make room for the other farter of this session.” 
I gave him a puzzled look. “Other farter?”
“Duh!” Greg replied, as he pulled me out of the set, impatiently. “You thought you were the only person capable of ripping ass?”
Honestly, kind of?
I mean, I don’t think about farts 24/7, but I do know that I’m pretty good at it. Ask Tim.
“Are you replacing me?” I bluntly asked.
Not gonna have a fight over… farting, that’s for sure. And I’m not even mad, I was just taking those extra bucks for granted.
“Don’t be jealous.” he replied, as he let me sit next to him, next to the director himself, as if I was one of the crew.
I watched as this masked guy stepped on the couch and squatted over Tom’s head, just as the poor guy was getting used to fresh air again. I guess this is his lucky day, assuming that he does have the kink.
“Action!” I almost went deaf when Greg screamed that.
The masked guy was basically another master and he acted accordingly.
“Here you go, fag. Got something for you to taste…” 
The fart that followed was very loud and echoed in the whole warehouse. On one hand, when I’m not the one torturing a poor soul with farts, yeah, it’s pretty gross. On the other, as a man, I gotta tip my imaginary hat to a fellow talented farter. The blast was nowhere as long as mine, but holy shit.
This other “master” was way more dominant than I was, way more natural I’d say.
“If you wanted a master, you could just ask…” I whispered into Greg's ear, sounding way more flirty than I intended to be, which almost made me laugh.
“You can’t be a master like him.” he firmly replied. “You’re too nice.”
Should I be offended? I really don’t know anything anymore at this point.
“Fire in the hole!” the masked master yelled, just as he ripped another loud fart down Tom’s throat.
I admit this guy’s voice sounded quite familiar, despite his best effort at trying to sound much deeper.
“Do we know this guy?” I asked Greg. The question almost startled him.
“Uhm. No idea.”
Ok, liar ahead. Clearly we know this guy then.
I will get to the bottom of this… after I put this masked guy to his place.
POV: Tom
Fuck. 
Dave’s farts were already impressive, but this masked guy’s blasts are really hard to endure, really pushing the limits of my kink. Those farts sound utterly gross, almost wet, and they smell horribly. I like working with Dave because, among other things, his roaring ass is loud but when it comes to stench, I can easily inhale those.
This guy… I have no idea who he is, Greg refused to introduce us for some reason, but I decided to trust him: I think I made a mistake. The rough surface of his skinny jeans is almost scraping my face.
Another fart erupted right into my nostrils, renewing the already terrible stench. It smells like… spoiled milk? I don’t know, it’s nauseating, I feel like I’m drowning in a sewer. I’m always very calm and composed when I’m… working, but I wasn’t ready for this I admit it.
“You’re such a bitch, I knew you couldn’t handle it.” the man said, ripping another loud, short rip.
If this guy doesn’t get up soon, I’m probably gonna choke in my own puke.
“Alright, that’s enough, get the fuck out of here.”
I heard Dave say, walking towards us, and I was relieved.
The masked man got up, my eyes adjusting to the spotlight shining over the set. I took a deep breathe of (relatively) fresh air, but anything was better than that. 
I managed to recognize Dave’s silhouette, towering over me.
“That was cute. Now let me show how a pro does it.”
Great. I’m basically the city you see in the background of kaijū movies while the monsters fight each other. You know the city, right? The city that usually gets completely leveled by the huge creatures?
I guess that’s my role for today.
Let’s get it over with.
As I said, Dave’s farts are huge but I’d take anything over that other guy’s gas.
I quickly took more deep breaths… before letting Dave sit on me again.
POV: Dave
“That was cute. Now let me show how a pro does it.”
I don’t know who this guy is, but if he really wants to do this, a fuckin’ fart challenge, then he’s gonna get blown away.
Well, not him, rather, my good pal right here on the couch.
“Alright…” I whispered to Tom. “Get ready bro. I’m gonna rip some huge ones and act like an asshole for a bit.”
I earned a puzzled look from him. “An asshole?” he paused for a moment. “But… you’re too nice.”
Oh great, now the sub tells me how lovey-dovey I am, perfect!
I stepped on the couch, not caring how my feet was crushing Tom’s chest, and squatted over his face, my fabric-clad anus tickling the tip of his nose. As I said, I’m always brewing a big one, and having a quick cheeseburger before coming here surely helped.
Once again, effortlessly, my ass started roaring, loud and unstoppable. As I kept pushing this one out, I maintained eye-contact with the mysterious masked challenger, who could only watch haplessly as I showed him what real talent looks like.
“Open wide, fag. This is far from over.”
Tom took it like a champ, inhaling deeply for the camera -I don’t even know if we started filming again. 
All I know is that my farting skills are a sight to behold… and to sniff, in Tom and Tim’s case at least.
Ahah… I’ll never understand this gross kink, but I gotta admit, if I had this fetish, and my best bro and roommate was, well, me, I’d probably be as thirsty as Tim is. So yeah, in a disgusting way… I get it.
And just like that, 12 seconds passed. Long, but not as long as my best ones, I can do even better than this… but I play fair so, after brushing my sweaty sweatpants ass on Tom’s face, I stood up and crossed my arms, eyes glued on my rival. 
“Your move, beanpole.” 
It’s ridiculous how seriously I’m taking all of this, but I can get quite competitive.
The masked master laughed and… lied on the floor. He held one leg up… that’s a position I’m quite familiar with. Surprisingly enough, he started sucking air in, right through his jeans. That’s a great talent I gotta say, I thought I was the only one who could fart on command so easily. 
A worthy opponent, at long last!
After a few seconds, the man stood up, proud and tall and, just like I did earlier, treated Tom as if he was part of the couch, and sat on his face. His eyes glued on me, I could tell there was a smug mile making fun of me under that ski mask.
The fart that followed was quite impressive and loud, but still not as massive as the ones I’m able to produce. This guy was good, no doubts about it. I’m pretty sure Tim would fall in love with him (the thought of that made me visibly laugh, putting a dent in the menacing aura I was trying to convey).
You know what, fuck this. It’s not worth it. 
But since I’m already here, and I’m able to rip huge farts both naturally and on command, I guess I could simply… well… join the fun, you might say.
I’m sure Tom will understand.
POV: Tom
The masked guy’s fart, despite being on command, was as foul as the one before. Dave’s blasts weren’t a cakewalk by any means, and they’re still much louder, deeper and stronger overall, but whatever this guy ate was doing numbers in his stomach. He was wearing a pair of skinny jeans but he could very well be naked for how much my nostrils were burning. 
The stench of Dave’s previous farts mixed with the rotten eggs-flavored gas this guy’s anus was blowing in my face and, truly, I started to think that this was a big test that Greg set up just for me, for some insane reason. If I survive this, I’m gonna kick his ass.
After around 9 seconds, the flatulence’s loudness faded out, essentially turning into a classic silent-but-deadly.
The man raised his ass just a bit, to make sure I could breath a bit of fresh air before the next one.
I turned my head and I could see Dave approaching the couch again.
Okay, it’s the other kaijū’s turn I assume.
Funnily enough, this is actually good ne-
...
Wait.
Why isn’t the other guy stepping aside?
“If it’s a show you want, Greg, a show you’ll get.” Dave boasted.
The farter above me finally moved, but just a bit, his ass still covering half of my face, hovering over my mouth.
The reason he moved, however, wasn’t altruistic by any means: instead, he had to make room for Dave’s ass, which ended up being planted directly onto my eyes instead.
Just... just fuckin’ do it you gassy bastards.
“Hey fag, it’s your lucky day.” the masked guy said.
“Good thing you have two nostrils: one of each anus.” Dave said.
Whether they were improvising or not wasn’t important, because their asses certainly weren’t.
Dave’s ass started speaking first, erupting his deep warm gas into my eyes. Mere seconds later, the other ass started talking as well, its fart being more high pitched. The sounds mixed together like a symphony and after a few moments I couldn’t tell which anus was being louder, ‘cause they both were. 
I became part of the couch as those two asses kept crushing me, farting loudly. My face couldn’t endure that barrage of farts any longer, as the farters kept cycling between either loud series of farts, or single long ones. The stench... I felt like they were taking a shit on me, I could taste that thick gas and even guess what they ate for lunch.
It was getting hot, too hot, and I started breathing more heavily, which only meant I got to ingest more of that poisonous gas. 
And yet, my massive boner betrayed my disgust.
While my eardrums were getting crushed by those farts, I could still manage to recognize Dave’s fart being the loudest: the man found a worthy opponent, sure, but he still owns the crown, no doubts about it.
“And for the big finale…” I heard the King say.
Dave lowered his sweatpants, exposing his sweaty bare ass (the masked farter kept his jeans on instead), and ripped a short, yet very loud toot, drops of sweat being blown onto my face and teary eyes (for the smell).
The two remained there for a few seconds, finally in silence from both ends, letting me inhale those last particles of gas, even though I’m pretty sure my skin merged with their farts on sub-atomic level, then they finally got up and shared a high-five.
Much to my surprise, the two men then turned back to me and helped me sit down, and they both high-fived me as well.
I guess a fart master is nothing without someone willing to sniff it all.
I appreciate the respect.
The mutual respect.
POV: Dave
After taking a much-needed shower and putting my civilian clothes back on (my usual dark brown hoodie and a pair of loose jeans), I cleared things up with Greg. 
He admitted he messed up things up with the schedule, and that indeed there was another “master” audition today, but he really enjoyed our improv and filmed everything, and thus the editors are pretty satisfied with what we managed to film today.
He also told me that, indeed, the mysterious farter is “a common friend” who didn’t want to be recognized.
No hard feelings with Tom either, obviously.
Now, time to tie up one last loose end.
I went outside, on the back of the warehouse, where I knew I could find my masked rival. He was checking his phone sitting on a shabby couch, an old prop that the crew moved here after they bought a new one for the set.
Basically, glorified comfy garbage.
“Hey, fire-in-the-hole-guy! I knew I’d find you here… that’s there they put the trash after all.” I said, with a smug smile.
The man shook his head and laughed. “Greg told you?” he asked.
I walked towards the couch and sat next to him, wrapping my right arm around his shoulder.
“You thought I woudn’t recognize your beautiful eyes, Adam?” I joked, acting all flirty (and hopefully annoying).
He  punched my shoulder and took his mask off.
Indeed, it was Adam all along.
He laughed a bit more.
“I didn’t know you were working with Greg.” he said. “Finally, you can make money from the one thing you're good at!"
“Very good at.” I corrected him.
I was going to fart to prove my point, but Adam seemed worried about something.
“I kind of needed those extra bucks you know...”
“Why is everything gravitating towards farts lately…” I thought out loud.
“What was that?” he asked.
“Nothing, forget about it.” I quickly said. “Extra bucks you said?”
“Yeah, as gross as it sounds, I thought I could make some quick money out of… whatever Greg’s doing here.”
“Hey, not judging bro!” I reassured him. “I mean, I’ve been doing this for a couple of months.”
“Does Dana know?” he asked.
“Nah, I didn’t tell anyone. Not even Tim, he’d probably be jeal-“ 
I bit my tongue just in time, even though I didn’t really think he’d get jealous. I was just trying to make a joke I swear!
“Jealous?” my friend inquired. “Jealous of what?”
“…Uhh… jealous of my success, obviously!”
Adam didn’t seem too interested in the conversation anyway, luckily enough, so he didn’t find anything suspicious about my not-so-harmless joke about my roommate.
“That’s envy, not jealousy, you idiot.” he observed.
Never mind.
A few dozens of seconds of silence followed. Adam wasn’t exactly a talkative guy, and he does have a job and all, but if he needs extra bucks, maybe I could help.
“I’m sure we can arrange something with Greg.” I stated.
“Mh?” 
“Yeah, you can fart on Tom on Tuesdays, while I can do it on Wednesdays.”
We stared at each other for a few seconds before bursting into laughter.
“I can’t believe we’re talking about this.” Adam admitted.
“Yeah.” I patted his shoulder. “From great farts, come great responsibility.”
We remained there, on that smelly (not because of us) couch, for a few more minutes, as if all that fart-talk was the most mundane thing in the world.
“Doing something tonight?” Adam asked.
“Dana and Tim are out of town, so probably nothing. You?”
“There’s a good pub a few blocks from here. Care for a beer?”
“Always.” I simply said, as we both stood up, and started marching towards our new destination.
“Easy bro.” Adam said. “I’m not gonna drag your drunk ass back home.”
“I can handle way more beer than you, pal!” I said.
“Yeah, in your dreams maybe.” he replied.
“Alright. Ready to lose against me for the second time today?” I threatened him.
“Lose?” he scoffed. “It was literally just far-“ 
I cut him off by ripping a huge, natural blast, staring at him with a smug grin. The fart easily echoed in the alley and I’m pretty sure they heard it downtown. It was short and sweet, you might say.
4 loud, proud seconds.
“I’m sorry.” I said. “You were saying?”
Adam laughed in response. “Fine, you won whatever that was back in the warehouse.” he admitted. “But I’m still not gonna drag your sorry drunk ass back home later.”
You know me, I’m a chill guy, but if you tease me, I can get very competitive.
I again wrapped my arm around his shoulder: “If it’s a show you want, Adam, a show you’ll get.”
Nah… maybe I’m too nice.
The End
83 notes · View notes
imdead770 · 7 months
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curtis sister!reader hcs?
(idk dude, with the gang or just with the curtis')
The Outsiders x Curtis Sister!Reader
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Authors Note - I don't know exactly what you meant, so I'm just winging it. Enjoy! Ps: I did the whole gang, so some of these are platonic (because their you're siblings, duh) P.P.S: You're Sodas twin, it's just easier and you're in a better age range. Yeah.
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Darry Curtis -
Since Darry is more laid back on Soda, I think he'd be laid back with you, too. Only difference is he's way more protective of you. Only thing is he has no idea what to do with you since you're female. He tries, though. Like if some guy broke your he'd beat their ass. Anytime a new partner comes he gives them the dad-style lecture. Pretty much the ideal big brother.
Sodapop Curtis -
Well you are twins, so it's only logical you're close. If I'm being honest people have probably thought you two were dating. Like you're both hot as hell. So everything someone asks you both are like 'Ew, we're literally siblings.' You two are basically joined at the hip. Not like matching outfits close, you two have different lives, but you and Soda tell each other everything. Since you both have middle child problems, it makes sense. Basically you 2 are besties.
Ponyboy Curtis -
Literally talks to you about everything. Girls? He comes to you. School? He comes to you. You're like the one big sibling he can open up to. Somethings he tells Soda, others he tells you. He finds comfort in you since you kind of remind him of mom. No one else sees it, but he does. You two argue, he's your little brother, it's only logical. Mostly about really stupid shit like he ate the last piece of chocolate cake pr something. But despite that you two are really close. Yahoo.
Dallas Winston-
Since he comes to the Curtis house a lot, he sees you a lot. And since your Sodapop's twin, you're hot as hell. You can see where this is going. The gang caught on whenever Dal would start inviting you to hang out with them. Or if you'd leave and he coincidentally had to go meet Buck at the same time. Anyways you're dating, he treats you as nice as Dallas Winston can. Darry hates it. Of all the nice boys you could've dated you picked the one most likely to break your heart. He's caught Dal sneaking in at least 5 times. Anyways Dal treats you pretty well, so eventually Darry treats him like he used to. It takes a while, though. A lot of glares.
Johnny Cade -
He met you whenever you wandered into the kitchen for something. The whole gang waved like you were a normal occurrence, so Johnny went with the crowd and waved back. He almost fell off the arm of the couch when you smiled and waved back at him. Honestly, your siblings were all for this. Johnny's the sweetest thing alive, he's your best option. Heck, Soda probably set you two up. Once you two started dating Darry didn't really care. It's Johnny, he had no reason to threaten him with a loaded shotgun. Johnny still gets nervous around Darry, though. Plus one time Pony walked in on you two kissing and it was awkward for them for like 4 weeks. Other then that it's like you aren't even a Curtis sibling.
Two-Bit Mathews -
He met you whenever you came out to hang out with the gang since you got bored of studying. He cracked some jokes like he usually does, but once he realized you thought he was funny, he made a scary amount of jokes, even for him. The gang noticed it, Darry was already like 'fuck no'. He's practically an alcoholic, you're too good for him. Somehow he pulled you, and Darry isn't as protective, but he still glares. Like if Two-Bit invites you to a party, somehow Darry pops out of thin air and glares. It's scary. But eventually it just becomes normally and everyone's okay with it. Anytime Two makes a dirty joke Darry silently threatens him with his life, though.
Steve Randle -
You came over to DX one time to ask Soda what he wanted for dinner. Instead you were met with Steve, who had no idea you were Soda's twin sister, and started hitting on you. Eventually Soda, you two talk, Steve connects the dots. He doesn't care though, he keeps flirting with you everything he sees you. Eventually you two start dating. Soda thinks it's weird, like his best friend is literally dating his female self. Steve didn't see it, though. Darry isn't too strict, I mean sure Steve's a dumbass but he doubts he'd hurt you. So no one really cares except Soda. He'll never see you or Steve the same.
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