#what will i do about work on tuesday??? and my dr's appointment???

[warrenwaskilledbyadeer]

What am I supposed to do

[mynameismckenziemae]

In Case You Didn’t Know

Part 8

(previous part here, next part here)

Jake ‘Hangman’ Seresin x OFC

Summary: Bradley greets you at the airport and you find something interesting while packing up Jake’s apartment.

Warnings: 18+ MDNI, this one gets a bit kinkier 😏🥴smut, mutual masturbation, toy use, ass play

•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•

“How much stuff do you have in San Diego?” You ask as you towel-dry your hair.

“Not much, mostly just clothes. The apartment came with furniture and never felt like getting my own. Guess even my subconscious knew I wasn’t planning on staying there long-term. I asked because I really just want you to come with me and meet the crew.”

“Good, your clothes should fit here, unless you have more than me. I wasn’t sure how we’d fit furniture though. And of course, I’ll come,” you smile. You’ve seen pictures but were excited to meet the people you’ve heard so much about.

He’s stuck on the first part of your reply. “You want me to move in?”

You nod. “I do, if you want to. I love waking up to you every morning. Even if you do hog the covers.”

“Do not,” he argues, snapping you with his wet towel.

•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•

Jake: I told her about the job and moving back home. She asked me to move in…like fully move in since I’m already basically living here.

🐓: Nice! Is she coming with you to get things settled here?

Jake: Yes. I ordered the ring today, it should be here by Tuesday. Are you sure you don’t mind recording? My ma will kill me if she doesn’t see it. She’s already mad she won’t be there. 🙄

🐓: I’m sure. I love your mom already.

🐓: Almost as much as your sister 🥵🤤

Jake: 🖕🏻

•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•

Jake brings you a beautiful bouquet of flowers on Wednesday, the day before you leave when he comes for his last appointment to be cleared with Dr. Hayes.

“Oh they’re beautiful, thank you,” you say, kissing him on the cheek, smiling at the blush that spreads over his face.

“Beautiful flowers for my beautiful girl,” he replies. You roll your eyes but smile.

“I think Hayes is ready for you,” you say, leading Jake to his office.

•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•

“Everything looks great, Jake. You’re cleared to get back to it,” Hayes tells him as he signs the forms. “Char told me you’re moving back though?”

“Yeah, after I get everything taken care of in San Diego. I took a position as an instructor in Kingsville, so I should be home most nights, other than short trips for training. The accident not only scared me but made me realize what’s really important,” Jake answers as he puts his shoe back on.

“I’ve never seen her happier. She hasn’t been herself since her mom got sick and then passed away. It’s so good to see her smile again.”

“Yeah, I agree. Can you keep a secret?” Jake asks as he gets off the exam table to sit in the chair by the desk.

“Yes, unless it’s something bad. My loyalty lies with Charlie,” Hayes says seriously as he continues working on the endless forms, but his lip quirks.

“It’s not. I’m gonna ask her to marry me when we’re in California,” Jake smiles.

Hayes drops his pen. “Oh man, that’s great! Congratulations!” He grins, clapping Jake on the back.

“She hasn’t said yes yet, but thanks,” Jake laughs.

“She will.”

•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•

The flight to San Diego is uneventful and the first thing you see by the baggage is the uniformed man with a mustache that you’ve heard so much about holding a bright pink sign that reads, ‘Welcome Home from Rehab Jake! Your Sex Addiction Doesn’t Define You!’

“For fucks sake, Bradshaw,” Jake mutters when he’s close enough to read it.

You laugh and meet Bradley in a hug. “I’m Bradley or Rooster. Nice to finally meet you, Charlie.”

“Nice to meet you too, thanks for helping him get to me,” you reply. “I love the sign.”

“Yeah. Real funny. Did you manage to think of that one yourself?” Jake says, cracking into a smile before he hugs him too.

“Nah, good ol’ Google helped me with it,” he grins.

Bradley drives the two of you to Jake’s apartment, helps get your bags inside, and opens the windows to air out the stale space while Jake changes.

“He looks so much better than when I dropped him off at the airport. Not just the injuries, he looked haunted almost. I would’ve flown with him had I known the idiot was going to take an Uber to your house,” Bradley says with a sigh.

“He sure does, I’ve never seen him look the way he did when he showed up on my doorstep. It’s not your fault, thanks for getting him as far as you did,” you smile.

“So tell me about Emma. Jake won’t give me anything, I think he’s just trying to be a protective big brother, but-“

“He’s not. He’s protecting you,” you laugh. “Emma is an amazing woman, but she’ll eat you alive. She’s a large animal vet. She’s wild, fun, incredibly smart, and a fiercely loyal friend but has no interest in relationships,” you smile sadly, remembering how gutted Emma was after her breakup with her high-school sweetheart. Something more had happened but she never would talk about it.

“Hmmm,” Bradley hums as if he’s undeterred.

“I’m good to go, you’ll be okay here for a bit? I’ll ride with Bradshaw but my truck’s in the garage if you want to go anywhere,” Jake says entering the living room.

“No problem, I can start packing for you…” you trail off as your mouth goes dry when you see him in his service khakis.

He smirks when he watches you look him over, eyes lingering where his biceps strain against his sleeves.

“I’ll uh, meet you outside. Not to be a cockblock but Cyclone’s expecting us in 20 minutes. See ya later, Charlie!” Bradley says as he shuts the door, noticing the heat in your gazes.

Jake grips the back of your neck and drags you to him in a rough kiss. “You looking at me like that does things to me, Charlie,” he murmurs against your lips.

“Like what?” You smile at his growl.

“This,” he groans as he brings your hand to palm his erection.

“Mmmm, I’ll take care of this later, I promise. You better go though, don’t want to leave on a bad note,” you say, pulling back from his lips and giving him a final stroke of your palm.

“Yeah, you’re right. Fuck,” he sighs, combing a hand through his hair before adjusting himself and heading to the door. “Love you.”

“Love you too!”

•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•

It doesn’t take you long to get his belongings into boxes before you move to the bedroom to pack his clothes. You smile, even though he’s been gone for several weeks, it still smells of his cologne and a hint of leather.

After you have his clothes put away, you check the drawer of his nightstand. You laugh (and blush) at what you find; a half-empty bottle of lube, tissues, expired condoms, a stroker toy, and a picture of you. It’s from a few summers ago when you went with your mom and his family up north fishing. You’re standing with your back to him at the edge of the dock, in a cheeky bikini, laughing at something he said.

It’s a cute picture, but the crinkled corner and the fact that it was hidden with those other items tell you exactly what he was doing while looking at it.

You take a picture of it, along with the other things you found, and send him a text.

Charlie: Found this picture of me hidden in your nightstand with some other interesting items. Did you use a PG-13 picture of me to jerk off? You do know PornHub is free, right? 😂

Jake: …no comment.

Charlie: I want to watch you use the toy. Like right when you get home.

Jake: Jesus. Okay. How do you even know what that is? From your sex books?

Charlie: You do know PornHub is free, right? 😏

Jake: Thanks for that visual. I’m hard now.

Charlie: 😘

Jake: We should be wrapping up here shortly, see you soon.

Charlie: I’ll be here waiting on your bed, touching myself.

Jake: Fuck. Don’t you dare stop before I get there.

Charlie:🫡

•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•

Jake bursts through the front door exactly 23 minutes later, and you’re nearing your second orgasm as he enters his bedroom, nearly tripping when he tries to get out of his pants.

“Don’t break your other leg,” you smile, sighing when you circle your clit faster, bringing yourself to the edge again quickly as you feel his eyes on you.

“Fuck!” You cry, arching your back as he leans forward, pushing your hands out of the way to lick your arousal, flicking his tongue over your clit. That’s all it takes for you to come apart with a drawn-out moan.

You have to stop him from going back for more. “I want to watch you now.”

His eyes close with a shudder. “Okay.”

•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•

“You are so fucking hot, Jake,” you breathe as you watch.

His eyes fall shut with a grunt at your words. His back is against the headboard, his hand fisting his cock. You’re kneeling between his legs, running your fingers over his thick, muscular thighs.

You lean forward like you’re going to kiss him but duck your head right before his lips touch yours to flick your tongue over his nipple. You smile at his frustrated sigh.

You tease his nipples, alternating between them with your fingers and mouth; pinching, biting, twisting, sucking. You commit to memory what elicits the best sounds before pulling back to hand him the lube and the toy.

“Do you want to see my collection when we get back? I haven’t needed any of my toys since we’ve gotten together but I think it’s only fair since I get to watch you.”

“Hell yeah I do,” he pants before he pushes into the lube-slicked toy with a groan

“Feel good?” You ask, biting your lip.

“Not even close as good as you, but yeah.”

Excess lube slides down his shaft, giving you an idea as you collect some on your finger.

“Can I try something?”

“Anything your kinky heart desires, sweetheart,” he replies.

You encourage him to scoot down further and bend his knees. Your left hand cups his sack as your right brushes the sensitive skin below and he jolts when your lubed finger finds his hole.

“This okay?” You ask when you lightly circle the tight ring of muscle.

“Mhmm, just surprised me,” he chuckles, but it turns into a moan when you lightly press.

You continue for a few minutes, circling and pressing, circling and pressing. “Still okay?” You ask as you push your finger in, letting him get used to the feeling.

“Yeah, still-holy shit!” He gasps, gripping the base of his cock to stave off his orgasm. “Wait-just…give me a second and do it again.”

“Found your prostate,” you smile, kissing his knee and rolling his balls in your left hand again until he relaxes.

His back arches when you press brush over it a second time, “Fuck! Please, again?” He rasps, tears are beginning to leak from his eyes.

His head drops back against the headboard as he jerks himself faster, the toy making lewd squelching sounds when you press gently once more. You whimper as you watch him cum with a broken sob.

•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•

A/N: no comment 🥴

As always, any interaction is appreciated but I love hearing what you think in comments/reblogs.

Tagging:

@mamachasesmayhem

@its-the-pilot

@dizzybee03

@sweetwhispersofchaos

@shanimallina87

@blindedbythelightt

@getmyprettynameoutofyourmouth

@lexixstewart

@phoenix-rising-starbird-one

@mrsrobertfloyd5

@charmedkim

@k-k0129

@bellaireland1981

@hookslove1592

@amiets2

@nero4te

@eli2447

@atarmychick007

@vixenobrian

@86laura11

@hisredheadedgoddess28

@dempy

@angelbabyyy99

@buckysteveloki-me

@djs8891

@mizzzpink

@daggerspare-standingby

@mrsevans90

[oneforthemunny]

hi! this is so silly lmao but my birthday is on tuesday the 21st (barf im turning 25) BUT if your requests are open, i was wondering if you could do a little eddie blurb (any one of the eddie’s i love them all sm) dealing with the readers birthday and how she doesn’t want to make a big deal of it (she secretly wants to but shhh) because aging is freaking her out but eddie makes it special and calms her down (this is soooo not self indulgent at all not in the slightest that would be soooo silly and crazy)

so sorry if this request is like so vague i’m just going through it fr! i love your work ive been binging it so much lately. no worries at all if you can’t get to this. okay i’m going to shut up talking now. love u!

happy happy birthday!!!! i've been saving this one for you <3 also 25 is so fun!!! anything but 23 truly. for this... i'm going with mafia!eddie lol. hope you enjoy!!!

"Baby," Eddie hummed, rounding the corner with a telephone note in hand. "Rosie said you got a call to confirm your appointment with Dr. Crothers?" His eyes met yours carefully, bleak, but scanning.

"Are you feeling alright?" He pressed, looking at you through the bathroom mirror. Your rigid posture, how you froze- even for just a moment- when the name was mentioned. Eddie didn't miss it.

"Yeah," You nodded, fingers brushing over your brows, smoothing them into place. "I- It's not that kind of appointment."

Eddie paused, waiting for you to continue. "What kind of appointment it is then?" He pressed, voice even and calm. "You're- You're not-"

"-No." You shook your head quickly. "No, I-I'm not. It's just for botox, Ed." The heat rushed to your cheeks, head ducking down to your chest.

"Botox?"

"Yeah, just a little bit. I-I read that you're supposed to get it early before you start really showing signs of aging, and it will help you not look so old in the future." You were rambling, heart buzzing furiously.

"You don't look old, baby." Eddie shook his head lightly, shoulders dropping.

He knew what this was about. You'd been off since the start of the month- your birth month. A whole month where all Eddie wanted to do- and did do- was spoil you, smother you in affection and drown you with gifts. Instead, you'd been cold, reserved.

"You don't have to do that." Your voice was soft, eyes dropping to the counter. "I'm twenty five-"

"-Exactly." Eddie rolled his eyes, scoffing lightly. "What's the matter? You're still young. Still hot." He muttered, tattooed hands brushing over your jean clad ass, squeezing your right cheek gently.

"Stop." You giggled gently, his lips finding your neck, nose buried in the perfume soaked skin- perfume he'd just bought you- lips sucking playfully at the sensitive skin.

"What's wrong?" Eddie muttered, arms heavy around your waist, an anchor that pulled you into him, steadied you. "Why are you being like this?"

You let your head rest against his shoulder, deflating in his hold. "I just feel weird." You mutter. "Getting older is weird. I still feel like I'm seventeen sometimes."

"Well, I'm glad you're not." Eddie snorted lightly, grinning at you through the mirror, squeezing your sides to make you squeal. "Glad you're twenty five. I hope you always get older with me."

You blushed, head lolling to the side, looking up at him. "You're sweet."

"I mean it." Eddie muttered, nose brushing over yours. "Not everybody gets to get older. A lot of people around me would've given anything to get older, keep having birthdays. It's not a bad thing."

You knew he was talking about his mom, maybe Jacob- his old business partner and friend.

"Besides, on birthdays," Eddie grinned, pulling away gently. "You get gifts."

"You do that all the time." You mumble, letting him pull you out of the bathroom, tugging on your hand, leading you to the stairs.

"Yeah, but not like this." Eddie grinned, that glint of devious excitement in his eyes, leaving you spinning.

He covered your eyes with his hands, a side stepped kind of dance into the sitting room, off of the garage.

"I told you not to get me anything else." You laugh, hands on his wrists to steady yourself while he guided you. "You already got me too much."

"Yeah, you're gonna like this one though, baby. Promise." You could hear Eddie's smug grin through his tone. "Alright, Gare."

There was a shuffling, a grunt of struggle from Gareth, and for a second- you really were clueless what Eddie could have possibly gotten you.

Then you heard it.

The faint whine of excited struggle.

The gasp that tore from your chest had Eddie flinching. You shoved his hands off your eyes, blinking to clear your vision, when you saw Gareth.

Standing in the middle of the room.

Wrangling a squirming, excited puppy in his arms.

"You-You didn't." Your hands flew to your mouth, eyes shining up at Eddie. He stood proudly, smile beaming with joy.

"The shelter in Bedford called last night. Gareth went and got him this morning." Eddie shrugged. "Happy birthday."

You took the excited, squirming puppy from Gareth, a sweet, baby Doberman that looked just like his brothers but with floppy ears that were too big for his size- it made your heart melt.

"Oh, look at you. You are so precious, yes you are." You cooed, nose nuzzling into the soft fur. The puppy whined excitedly, licking at your cheeks, clawing up your shoulder to get closer to you.

"He's so sweet!" You squealed, hugging the puppy closer. "You're so sweet." You look at Eddie, love drunk and starry eyed.

"Anything for you, beautiful. You know that." Eddie muttered, finger hooking under your chin, pulling you in for a sweet kiss. Well, part of a sweet kiss, until the puppy was licking at the both of you. Eddie snarled, wiping his face dramatically, your pouting glare stopping him from snapping.

[50calmadeuce]

Ch. 23: The Holidays

Warning: Mention of miscarriage. Some chapters have sex.

Disclaimer: This is a work of fan fiction using characters from the Top Gun: Maverick world, trademarked by Paramount Pictures Corporation. I do not claim ownership of the characters and the world that I am borrowing.

The story and situation I am creating are a work of my imagination and I do not ascribe them to official story canon. This work is for entertainment only and is not a part of the storyline.

I am not profiting financially from the creation and publication of this story, but I do hope it gives you happy thoughts.

These stories are my own, so please do not take them and use them for yourself without my permission. If you see them somewhere else, please let me know. :)

Three months had swiftly passed since Jake's departure, and now Thanksgiving was upon you. You managed to hire an assistant for the winter months, a move that significantly alleviated the burden of your grant work. Additionally, your employer brought on a paid intern to work alongside you. After revealing your pregnancy to them, your boss showed incredible understanding and support, making your professional life much more manageable during this pivotal time.

On Tuesday, you had plans to fly out to Jake's parents' house, a trip that also included a meeting with Dr. Colson at the school to discuss the grant. At this point in your pregnancy, you hadn't started showing visibly, and you hadn't shared the news with Jake or his parents yet. However, you noticed your clothes beginning to fit more snugly around you. Jake knew about your trip to his parents for Thanksgiving and was also aware that his parents would be flying up to spend Christmas with you. This series of visits was imbued with anticipation, not just for the festive gatherings but also for the moment you would eventually decide to share your pregnancy news, adding another layer of significance to these family reunions.

As you drove to the doctor's office for your monthly baby check-up, these thoughts swirled in your mind, intertwining with the everyday realities of pregnancy. You had entered your 14th week, and thankfully, the morning sickness wasn't too severe, though it had a knack for surprising you at the most inconvenient moments. This period marked the beginning of your second trimester, a time when many expectant mothers start to feel better, but you remained vigilant, aware that each day could bring its own set of challenges. The anticipation of the upcoming family gatherings, the necessity of revealing your pregnancy to Jake and his family, and the practical considerations of managing work commitments with your condition were all prominent on your mind as you navigated the road to your appointment.

Parking your F-250 in the hospital parking lot, you felt a mix of excitement and anticipation wash over you as you made your way to the entrance. Today was not just any ordinary visit to the doctor. You had been given the option to find out the sex of your baby during this appointment, and you had eagerly agreed. As you walked towards the entrance of the hospital's entrance, your excitement grew. This pregnancy was a week longer than the last one and all of your appointments showed great progress.

Lying on your back on the examination table, with a full bladder which is often recommended for better ultrasound images, you awaited the procedure with a blend of nervousness and excitement. The ultrasound technician applied warm jelly to your belly, a sensation that was both strange and comforting. As the tech started moving the ultrasound probe across your stomach, the cold of the gel was quickly forgotten, replaced by the anticipation of seeing your baby on the screen. The room was filled with the soft hum of the machine, a backdrop to the extraordinary moment unfolding.

"So, what do you think it is?" the ultrasound technician inquired, her eyes still focused on the monitor as she maneuvered the probe.

You gave a small shrug, mixed with a hopeful smile. "I, personally, think it's a boy," you said, the words carrying your wishful thinking.

The technician continued her scanning, her movements precise. "Well, as soon as...oh! There we go! You're correct! You're having a boy!" she announced, a note of excitement in her voice matching your own.

"Really?" Your smile broadened, a mixture of surprise and joy lighting up your face.

The tech adjusted the screen slightly, orienting it so you could have a clear view. "See, right there. That's a little penis." She pointed out the defining feature with professionalism, yet her tone carried a hint of shared joy.

Looking at the screen filled you with an indescribable feeling. You and Jake were going to be parents. The reality becoming real again.

That evening, you made your way through the mudroom and entered the kitchen, where Chuck was busy preparing dinner.

"How did your appointment go?" he inquired.

"It went quite well," you responded.

"Did they tell you what it is?"

A smile spread across your face. "It's a boy."

Chuck's smile mirrored yours. "Doc, that's fantastic news! The Lieutenant is going to be over the moon!"

"I know, I'm so excited. It feels surreal that this is happening again."

Chuck walked over and embraced you. "You're going to be an amazing mother."

After the embrace, you let out a sigh. "Now, the question is, how do I tell Jake's family without them spilling the beans to him?"

Chuck pulled back slightly, the corners of his eyes crinkling as he pondered your question. "Well, knowing them, keeping a secret might be a bit of a challenge. But maybe we can turn this into something fun, a kind of game."

You looked at him curiously, intrigued by the idea.

"How about during Thanksgiving you come up with a game?" he suggested. "We could say it's just to catch up, nothing out of the ordinary. And during the gathering, we give them a 'mission' – they have to come up with the most creative way to keep the secret from Jake, making it a bit of a competition among them."

You couldn't help but laugh at the thought. "That could actually work. They love a good challenge. But what about when Jake finds out? Won't he feel left out?"

Chuck nodded, considering. "We make sure that the reveal to Jake is something special, just between you and him. That way, the family gets to have their fun, but the most important moment remains intimate and personal."

"That's a great idea," you agreed, feeling a weight lift off your shoulders. "It keeps everyone engaged and makes the reveal to Jake even more memorable."

"Exactly," Chuck smiled, returning to the stove.

Pulling out your phone, you said, "I'll look up some bakeries and figure something out." Pondering for a moment, you added, "Maybe some Thanksgiving cupcakes, but with blue icing or a blue filling?"

"That sounds like a fantastic idea!" Chuck agreed enthusiastically. "So, when they unwrap them or take a bite, they'll be curious about what's going on."

Glancing at your watch, you noted it was Monday, and you weren't scheduled to leave until the following Tuesday. There was hope you could find a bakery in time. "I'm going to make some phone calls," you announced and made your way to the office to start the arrangements.

That following Tuesday as you disembarked from the plane, you made your way towards the waiting area where you knew Jake's mom would be waiting.

"Y/N!" she called out, spotting you in the crowd. She quickly moved towards you.

You both shared a warm embrace.

"It's so good to see you," she said as you both stepped back from the hug.

"It's great to see you too," you responded, the warmth of the greeting easing the fatigue from the journey. "I've been looking forward to this visit."

Jake's mom, with her ever-present smile, linked her arm with yours as she started to guide you through the bustling airport. "Have you heard from Jake?"

"No. It's been a couple of weeks. I know he's been doing some pretty intense training, so I'm not surprised. He did say he was going to try and call on Thanksgiving."

"That's good to hear," she responded, pausing with you in front of the baggage claim area.

Her expression held a mix of understanding and concern, a sentiment shared by families of those in demanding professions. "I'm sure he'll make the call. Jake knows how important these moments are, especially around the holidays."

As you waited for your luggage to appear on the conveyor belt, she continued, "We all miss him terribly, but knowing he's out there, doing what he loves and is passionate about, makes it a bit easier to bear."

Your luggage arrived, and together, you maneuvered it off the belt. With everything gathered, you followed her to the car, the conversation flowing effortlessly between you. It was comforting, this sense of family and connection, especially with Jake away.

As you settled into the passenger seat, Jake's mom glanced over with a soft smile. "So, tell me everything. How have you been? And how's work?"

The drive to their home provided the perfect opportunity to catch up, share stories, and for a moment, bridge the gap Jake's absence had left.

The following day, you made your way to Texas A&M to catch up with Dr. Colson. Upon your arrival, he welcomed you warmly, and you both embraced in a heartfelt hug.

"Y/N! It's so wonderful to see you!" He examined you from head to toe. "You seem different somehow, or is it just me?"

You couldn't help but smile, the secret you were keeping making his comment feel even more poignant. "It's good to see you too, Dr. Colson. And maybe there is something different," you said, your smile broadening as you spoke.

Dr. Colson raised an eyebrow, his interest clearly piqued. "Oh? Do tell. I hope it's good news."

Taking a deep breath, you decided it was as good a time as any to share the news with someone who had been a mentor and friend through many significant moments in your life. "Well, it is actually. I'm expecting," you revealed, watching his reaction closely.

The look of surprise quickly morphed into one of pure joy. "That's wonderful news!" Dr. Colson exclaimed, embracing you once again. "Congratulations! I'm so happy for you. How have you been feeling? And how does Jake feel about it?" he asked as he pointed to the chair for you to sit down in and you did.

"Jake doesn't know yet. I don't want him to worry like he did last time. Luckily, the grant was substantial enough that I could hire a few interns, and my job also brought on an intern."

"That's fantastic news. I'm pleased to hear things are progressing more smoothly than before."

"Me too."

"Well, now onto some business," he said, pushing a file across the desk towards you.

You picked it up, opened it, and after reading through it, looked up at him perplexed. "This is Dorian's research," you stated, a mix of confusion and curiosity in your tone.

Dr. Colson nodded, his expression becoming a bit more serious. "Yes, it is. I wanted you to take a look at it because we've realized that a lot of the work in the book was actually yours. I'd like you to review his work. Now, this will require you to spend a few weeks in Wyoming, but that's all. The university will cover all expenses."

"I'm not concerned about the money, Jason," you replied, meeting his gaze.

"I know that," he acknowledged. "Your concern is more about Dorian."

"It's not just that," you continued. "I'm also worried about how Jake will react. He was so relieved when I decided against taking the grant in Wyoming and you offered me my current grant." You set the folder back on his desk.

"Just give it some thought, Y/N. If you choose not to go, I'll completely understand. But I have to be honest, Dorian's work hasn't been up to the mark this time around," Dr. Colson said earnestly.

You inhaled deeply, exhaling slowly. "I'll think about it," you assured him, the weight of the decision settling on your shoulders. Standing up, you sought clarity on the timeline. "When do you need an answer by?"

"As soon as possible, I'm afraid. I'm aware the holidays might complicate things, but we need to keep moving," he explained.

"Can you send me what you have so far? I can at least start looking at the numbers," you suggested, hoping to make an informed decision.

"Gladly," he agreed with a nod, acknowledging your willingness to consider the request.

"You owe me, Jason," you half-joked, pointing a finger at him to emphasize the point.

"Don't I know it," he responded, a mix of gratitude and acknowledgment in his voice.

Later that evening, you entered Jake's parents' kitchen, carrying a box brimming with cupcakes. Cindy was the only one around.

"Y/N, you really didn't need to bother with dessert," Cindy remarked as you set the box on the counter.

"It's no trouble at all. Take a look—they turned out really cute!" You opened the box to reveal adorable turkey-shaped cupcakes peering up at you.

Cindy leaned over the box, a delighted smile spreading across her face. "Oh, these are just wonderful!"

"You should try one," you suggested, reaching in to pick up a cupcake and handing it to her. "I had one on the ride home."

Cindy laughed, taking the cupcake from you. "I shouldn't spoil my appetite, but who can resist something this cute?" She admired the detail for a moment longer before taking a small bite. Her eyes lit up, confirming her approval. "Delicious! The frosting is just the right amount of sweet." She inspected it closely, then her eyes widened at the sight of the blue filling. "Y/N, it's filled with blue. I think they made a mistake."

"No, the blue is intentional. The ultrasound tech confirmed it last week," you explained with a smile.

Cindy paused, processing the information. Realization dawned on her face as she looked up at you. "Y/N…are you…?"

You nodded enthusiastically.

Cindy's eyes widened in shock and delight. "OH MY GOD!!! I'm going to be a grandma again!?"

"Yes, you are!" you exclaimed, sharing in her excitement. Cindy rushed over and enveloped you in a warm, tight hug.

"This is such wonderful news!" Cindy said, pulling back slightly to look at you with teary eyes. "How are you feeling? Tell me everything!"

You laughed, thrilled to finally share the news. "I'm feeling good, a little tired, but it's all worth it. I wanted to wait until I was sure to start telling everyone."

Cindy wiped a tear from her eye and shook her head in disbelief. "This is just the best news. Jake must be over the moon!"

At the mention of Jake's name, you stiffened, and Cindy picked up on your reaction.

"Y/N, you have told him, haven't you?" she asked, her voice tinged with concern.

You shook your head. "No, and please don't tell him."

Cindy’s expression shifted from excitement to confusion, and then concern washed over her face. "Oh, honey, why haven't you told him? What’s going on?”

You took a deep breath, knowing that explaining this was going to be as hard as deciding to keep it a secret, even temporarily. "I've been trying to find the right moment. With everything going on at work and him being deployed, I just didn't want to add more to his plate until things settled a bit."

Cindy's expression softened as she reached out and took your hands in hers, her touch warm and reassuring. "You're afraid of what happened last time, aren't you?"

You nodded, the weight of your worries momentarily pressing down. "I love him, but what he did hurt. I've taken all the precautions this time. I have interns helping me, but I know Jake still thinks I shouldn't be doing my job."

"How far along are you?" Cindy's voice carried a mixture of excitement and concern.

"Just hit four months this week. Chuck has been helping me a lot too," you replied, grateful for the support.

Cindy's eyes shimmered with a mix of emotions. "Four months… you've been carrying this secret along with everything else." She paused, her gaze intensifying with empathy. "You're doing incredibly well, but you shouldn't have to do this alone. Jake needs to know, not just because it's his right, but because he might surprise you. He loves you, and he might just be scared too."

You felt a tear slip down your cheek, touched by Cindy's understanding. "I want to tell him. I really do. It’s just… every time I think about it, I get so anxious. What if he reacts badly again?"

Cindy squeezed your hands, a determined look setting on her face. "Let’s not assume the worst. He’s grown since then, and so have you. And if he reacts poorly, you aren’t alone this time. You have me, Chuck, and the rest of your family and friends who will stand by you no matter what."

Taking a deep breath, you nodded, feeling a surge of resolve bolstered by Cindy's unwavering support. "You're right. He's supposed to be calling on Thanksgiving. Maybe if we all tell him, it won't be so bad."

Cindy nodded encouragingly. "That sounds like a good plan. Having everyone there might make it a more celebratory atmosphere, and it’ll show him that you’re not alone in this. It’s important he sees the support system around you."

You felt a little more confident with the idea of having the support of the whole family when you shared the news. "Thank you, Cindy. I don’t know what I’d do without you."

Cindy smiled warmly. "You'll never have to find out. Just remember, whatever his initial reaction, it's just a moment. It will pass, and we'll deal with what comes after together."

Tags: @buckysteveloki-me @bellyliveslife @tgmreader @86laura11 @dizzybee03 @kmc1989 @guacam011y @nerdgirljen @hookslove1592 @dempy @djs8891

[starman-jpg]

Better to Die Numb, Then Feel it All

WC: 1.9K | TW: alcoholism

I have no idea where this idea came from, but 5 hours later, here's this piece.

I actually do not know much about alcoholism. Diane is based off of my own therapist and how she has helped me through difficult times.

This also not beta read, its 1 am, I need sleep. Hope you like this

Title from "Growing Sideways" by Noah Kahan

No one seemed to realize how Steve had changed.

His hair is grown out and hasn’t been styled for months. The bags under his eyes keep getting bigger after every sleepless night. He’s lost a couple pounds and sticks to wearing baggy sweaters and sweatpants. And he drinks. A lot. Even at his peak of high school popularity, he never drank as much as he does now.

Everyone tries to bring it up, but he shrugs them off and redirects the conversation. And every time, the person takes the bait and plays with it. He’s out of the spotlight until it gets brought up again, but he can do the same thing. Over and over again. Works every time.

He knows what he’s doing is unhealthy. But he can’t stop. It’s impossible. 

It all hit rock bottom when he screamed at Eddie. His Eddie. His perfect, beautiful boyfriend, Eddie, merely suggested Steve get help. Steve yelled, trying to convince Eddie (and maybe himself) that he was fine. That he doesn’t need Eddie’s help and he should just leave if he doesn’t want to "see Steve drink himself to death".

So Eddie left and didn’t come back. The days turn into weeks with no response from Eddie.

After a month, he finally reached out for help.

He ended up running to the Hopper-Byers house, sobbing. When the door opened for Joyce, he fell into her arms and begged her to help him. Hopper talked to Owens and got the help Steve needed.

"And now, I’m here." Steve shrugs, picking at his sweater, slowly lifting his head to see his therapist, Diane.

Diane was a sweet lady. She was in her late 40s with shoulder-length, sandy brown hair and a pair of square, black-rimmed glasses.

She smiles sweetly and says, "I’m glad you are here, Steve."

Steve shifts uncomfortably, bringing his knees to his chest. Well, I wish I could say the same." He mutters before realizing she heard that. "Sorry, I-I shou-"

"No, no. Don’t say sorry. You have nothing to be sorry for."

"Were you not listening to what I said for the past 15 minutes?"

She softly laughs, saying, Yes, Steve, I heard you. Those things were not great. But considering what you went through in the Upside Down, I can see why that happened."

Steve looks at Diane in shock and says, "Y-you know? About the, uh…"

"Upside Down?" He nods, and she smiles, saying, "Yes, I know. I was one of the many scientists working under Dr. Owens. My focus was more on the psychological effects of the Upside Down. I also happen to be a certified therapist. So, when Dr. Owens asked for my help with an Upside Down survivor, I gladly took it."

"An ‘Upside Down survivor’? Is that what we’re called?"

"Unfortunately, yes. We don’t exactly have the correct term to refer to you all as."

Steve slowly nods, putting his feet back on the ground. "We just call ourselves the ‘Party’ as a whole. But then, if we’re split up, each group has their own name." Steve smiles slightly and says, "Like in 1985, my little group was called ‘Scoops Troop’. Because me and my best friend Robin worked at Scoops Ahoy before—well, y’know."

"I do know." She quickly writes in a notebook before turning back to Steve and asking,  "So, the Party? Tell me about them."

And that’s how these appointments worked. Every Tuesday, he pulls up to Diane’s office and talks to her. About the upside-down and all the head trauma. His fears and his hopes He even talked about his childhood and how his parents were always gone.

Although not all of the appointments were that easy,

He made a deal with Diane. If he could go a week without drinking, she’d tell him one thing about her. (It was weird how he was pouring out his heart and soul, but he didn’t know a thing about her.)

"Steve…" 

"I saw him yesterday when I went to pick up Max for a sleepover." He sniffled. "Max was talking with him, and he looked so happy. And I thought about how I could never make him happy." He sighs, wiping his eyes. "I tried to wave. He turned his back and walked back inside. I dropped Max off, and then I remember being in a bar. Ordering a drink, which turned into two and..."

He can’t stop the tears this time. "I’m sorry. I-I failed. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry." He hides his face behind his hands as he sobs.

He hates that he failed. He’s so used to being the screwup, and this one time, he knew he could make it. He only had one more day. He could’ve made it. Even with all the close calls early in the week, he managed to push them down.

He wanted to prove that he could do it.

He needed to prove that he could do it.

"It’s okay, Steve. It’s okay." Diane softly soothes.

"I failed though. I drank." 

"That’s okay-"

"It’s NOT okay! How could you say that?" He yells.

"I did not expect you to win this challenge."

"So, you’ve already given up on me? Fucking great! My own goddamn therapist doesn’t even believe in me." He stands up, pacing the room and biting his tongue. He didn’t want to say anything he’d regret.

"I did not expect it because it’s not that easy. You expected to give up drinking and suddenly be cured? That’s not the problem."

Steve stops, slowly turning around to look at his therapist. "Isn’t that the problem? The drinking? Isn’t that why I’m here?"

"The drinking is how you deal with the problem. And you’re here because you want to be better, right?" He slowly nods, sitting back down on the couch. "Then let's figure out the problem."

---

Steve kept up his appointments. Never missed one.

Everyone could see how he was becoming Steve again. He made amends with the kids and with Robin. He never realized how he pushed her away along with everyone else.

When he showed up on her doorstep, paper in hand, to make amends, he was bombarded with a hug and the gentle sobs of his best friend. His other half His Platonic soulmate with a capital P Steve explains what he’s been going through and how he's getting help.

"I’m 4 months sober, so that's good."

"That’s so good, Steve. I’m so happy for you." She hugs him and doesn’t let go for quite literally hours. They caught up. There were two months without his soulmate; he needed all the details. e

Robin plans a movie night at his house (typical). She invites the kids, the teens, even Hopper and Joyce, who politely decline but still drop off El and Will.

Everyone was there, except Eddie. He wasn’t surprised. If he were Eddie, he wouldn’t want to see him either.

But, of course, Eddie needed to make an entrance. The front door slams open (the door handle definitely leaves a mark on the wall) as Eddie steps in. He’s as beautiful as always. His worn-out Metallic shirt with some black jeans His hair was tied back, showing off his jaw and neck.

Steve nearly forgot how to breathe. How did Eddie still take his breath away?

Everyone greets Eddie with smirks, hoisting up sodas for the kids and beers for the adults.

Steve felt his stomach drop to his feet. He hasn’t kept alcohol in his house for three months now. There was a bottle stashed in the back of his closets "in case of emergency". He threw it out after calling Diane one night during a particularly horrible day.

Robin must sense his discomfort. She grabs his hand, squeezing once before asking Eddie for a soda. Jonathan, Argyle, and Nancy Eddie handed out the sodas to the kids with loud pleading from Mike for just one beer, which Nancy was not having.

He hears the familiar sound of a can opening and watches as Nancy takes a sip from her can. He didn’t think this through. He forgot that even though he stopped drinking, that didn’t mean everyone else did as well.

"You want one?" Steve snaps out of his thoughts, turning his head to Eddie holding up a beer can.

Steve stares at the can wantingly.

He knew this was going to happen. Everyone didn’t really notice how bad Steve’s drinking was. They just knew he drank a little more than usual. He should’ve said no alcohol was allowed. He should’ve just told everyone how bad his drinking was, and now he’s sober.

Eddie must take his silence as a yes, because he’s holding out a beer to Steve.

This is it. He’s going to break his sobriety because the literal love of his life is handing him a beer.

Shit. 

He’s going to have to call Diane and explain how much of a failure he was. He can’t even be properly sober.

But she would calm him down and repeat a million times how he wasn’t a failure. He knew that recovery would be hard, but he still decided to do it. And how he’s made it four months now without drinking. And how that is such a big step alone in his recovery. That he did the right thing by calling her.

"Steve?" Robin’s soft voice breaks him out of his thoughts as she gestures to Eddie.

Steve looks over at a confused Eddie, still holding out the beer.

"Oh, um, I’m good."

Eddie has the decency to look surprised as he retracts his arm. "You’re good?"

Steve stops to think. He’s sober. He’s happy. He’s recovering.

He has Robin by his side. And Diane is just a phone call away if he needs her.

He might not have had Eddie. He might never have Eddie again. But he can live with that. Eddie deserves to be happy, and if that’s not with Steve, that’s okay.

He smiles and nods, saying, "Yeah, I’m good."

Eddie smiles slightly at Steve, puts the beer back, and grabs two sodas. Eddie places the drinks down and hands a soda to Steve before sitting on the other couch. Steve looks ahead as the movie starts, but he can’t help stealing glances at Eddie.

And it gets better when he sees Eddie stealing glances himself.

--- 

He told the Party that night about his recovery. That he’s 4 months sober. It’s a tough process, but he’s going to see it through.

The kids hugged him, then unanimously agreed to throw out the rest of the beers. The adults agreed to stop drinking even after Steve’s loud protests that "it��s fine if they drink, just maybe not around him?"

It was a little easier to stay sober after that night.

Months pass. Steve’s still sober. A whole year now.

No one left his side, not once. Not even Eddie.

After 7 months sober, Steve took a chance, asked Eddie out, and was pleasantly surprised when Eddie said yes. They’ve been back together ever since. Eddie is his #1 supporter.

Three months later, Eddie told him, "I love you," and he felt the same spark he felt back then.

One year later, Steve and Eddie move in together in a small house near the trailer park.

Two years later, Steve and Eddie get married. Not officially, but who needs some bullshit government papers when they’ve already been to hell and back with each other?

It hasn’t been an easy road. Recovery never is, but he has Eddie. He has Robin. He has the kids. He has Hopper and Joyce. He’ll be okay.

After all, Steve still sees Diane. Every Tuesday. 

[marcholasmoth]

OSRR: 3666

today started out better than yesterday. then it quickly went downhill.

i went to lunch with my mom at our usual tuesday spot, and i got the fish and chips because that's how i was feeling, but before i could do much of anything, the pain once again resumed and it wiped me out to the point where i couldn't finish my fish :c

and if that was how i felt with a full night of sleep, how much worse would've it been if i hadn't?

unfortunately, we had more to do.

we stopped at home and mom grabbed some advil from inside, and we were on our way. mom and i went to walmart and i got my undercut touched up. we went to a farm stand for pastries. we stopped by the shop so james could look at mom's car, and then we drove home. i had my doctor's appointment at 2:50, so i went over by myself and was able to talk to my doctor about the cortisol thing.

provided i can wake up early enough, ill be heading over there first thing for a blood test because the morning is when both cortisol and testosterone are at their highest levels. if anything's off, we'll try something else and if that doesn't help, it'll be off to an endocrinologist for me. and thankfully, dr. k was extremely receptive to all of it. he even said it would potentially explain a lot of things, and he agreed with me.

it's really nice to be listened to by a medical professional.

get yall a dr. k.

then i spent the rest of the afternoon on the couch under a quilt as i watched tv with my mom.

mom went upstairs to rest because her kidneys were hurting her, and she ended up napping for a while. i watched episodes that weren't important while i crocheted.

james made dinner when he got home. he's one of the hardest working people i know.

it was a new recipe - i'm not sure what to think of it. it was french style hunter's chicken, which i'm not sure if that means anything, but it was. interesting.

after dinner i went back and sat on the sofa, still pained, but a little easier because of the protein. i still think i'll end up eating an enormous burger and chocolate shake tomorrow to help.

damn.

anyway, i'm excited to see joel tomorrow. i'm not thrilled to go to work. but honestly i was thinking about the convention and how absolutely ready i am to demand time off or quit. like either they let me do what i want or that scrounge to find another analyst and everyone still there gets shafted. like, fuck around and find out how willing i am to let this whole place burn.

damn.

when did i get so angry?

probably when i had to become a mediator for people's feelings, or when i got written up for a decision that no one else agreed with despite past experiences. or probably when our supervisor got changed and now we get thrown under the bus instead of defended. fuck that. fuck that so hard. fuck.

fuck.

[smalife1234]

This is our THIRD weekly smiles!!

What made me smile this week?

Monday, 8/12/24 - today is the dreaded doctor appointment but the one where we finally find out about my endocrinologist!! As most of you know, my endocrinologist left because of health issues or just because of retirement on the 8th, and we decided to meet at the next Dr appointment if we could find an endocrinologist in Asheboro that would fit me for a while! Sadly, we got news that I could get a new endocrinologist, but it would still be in Greensboro since none are in Asheboro! Which is disappointing! Then after that news, we checked height and weight! Sadly I lost weight and didn't gain any height :/ at my last endocrinologist appointment, which was May 8th, I was 99.12lb. Now I am 98lb so I'm back down a pound and a half! Which is a bummer. Then we needed three shots, one shot for a strain of meningitis, another for something else, and then a finger prick to test cholesterol! The finger prick didn't hurt at first until we put Gauze on my finger and a bandaid and those shots made our shoulders all sore which sucks :( but I'm happy to have it over with and I'll be having another one in September! Whoo appointments! I'm happy that the rest of the day is just doing dishes and chilling and some editing, but I'm smiling nonetheless!

Tuesday, 8/13/24 - today we are going to our grandma's house! In the morning, we woke up to sparkling water and yummy Takis and a good ol gallon of milk, wishing it was that restocked when we came back from Grandma's, but that's ok! We chilled until Grandma and Grandfather picked us up! We sat and chilled and watched Subway Surfers ads. Sadly, our arm soreness is not getting better. It's even worse than yesterday. Earlier this morning, Matthew was putting on my shirt, and it hurt, which was not fun, so thankfully, we're taking it easy! When we get to Grandma's house we will have a yummy turkey sandwich! With mayonnaise! It was very yummy, and then after that, we played uno for a while, and we had a fun time. Now we're chilling on the exercise bike for a few and did a few miles! Then, after that, we enjoyed a yummy dinner of ham, potato salad, creamed cucumbers, and macaroni and cheese! It tasted great, and then Matthew finished his last mile on the bike. After a little while, we got an ice cream sandwich, which was good, and then we went to bed at 10:00 p.m. The whole day made me smile!

Wednesday, 8/14/24 - today, we woke up around 8:00 Am and went upstairs to some yummy French toast. We ate it, and it was so yummy! Then we chilled downstairs and waited for our friend to get out of the shower so far just sleepy but enjoying the quiet morning later into the day we went outside and picked blueberries and took down the fence around the Berry it was hard work but we got to have it all rewarded with spaghetti 🍝 with some zucchini and Italian sausage! It was very yummy paired with our meal was a yummy sprit after our meal, we chilled for a while and watched Instagram reels. It wore us out, but tomorrow will be a less busy day! And currently, we're having ice cream sandwiches! Also very yummy! Now we're chilling watching ads on our tablets. Today was very tiring, but a good one made me smile!

Thursday, 8/15/24 - we woke up around 8:00 Am and didn't shower since we had taken two showers yesterday from all the hard work! We went upstairs to find yummy blueberry pancakes 🥞 sitting there and a fried egg 🍳! We sat down and got a glass of milk! And then our friend kept coughing and it made us laugh! My wife Emmie burped so disgustingly that it made us start dying in laughter! Until Grandfather came into the room, we were still dying of laughter. We hid our laughter from Grandfather. Willam was dying with his cup of milk. I was just trying to answer his remarks, lol! We still were dying after he left, lol. We then went downstairs, where I worked on weekly smiles! And then we chilled for a very long time just watching Instagram reels after hours of watching Instagram reels lol we headed upstairs around 3:00 P.m. to prepare a Mexican stew-type dish that contained green pepper onions hot pepper flakes and other seasonings we headed downstairs where we hung out and chilled until 6:00 Pm where we had the yummy stew surprisingly for having beans (which I don't like because of the texture) it tasted pretty good! It was great. Sadly, this is our last full day at Grandma's. That didn't make me smile, but the awesome day certainly made me smile!

Friday, 8/16/24 - today is the last day of Grandmas :( which sucks but we had a wonderful time! This morning we woke up to more blueberry pancakes 🥞 🫐! Yummy we talked a little about some vitamin gummies that me and our friends have to take since we're low on our vegetables! But that's ok. We headed downstairs, where I took my shower first. It's always nice to take a warm shower even though I can only feel it on my neck, my head, my top hand, and half my thumb. Fun :) now we're packing up and ready to leave around 1:00 pm! Before leaving, I was looking at old photos of me when I was first injured, which was almost 3 human years ago on September 1s,t, perfect for SCI awareness month! I saw how much strength I had originally since my SMA wasn't in effect and I didn't have ALS! It's always super cool to hear about my strength and see my strength back then it made me smile! Then after that, we had a yummy lunch, a yummy turkey sandwich with mayonnaise! It tasted great, and then we headed home, where we enjoyed new songs! That we never listened to. We said goodbye to Grandma and Grandfather! We had a lovely visit and it was amazing! But now we're home enjoying listening to music and watching many things! We're having fun. The first night at home made me smile! Later that night, I overheated, which sucked, and then during the night, something almost fell on me! Don't worry I'm fine now! It didn't make me smile, but the rest of the day did!

Saturday, 8/17/24 - today, I woke up and chilled. I woke up pretty early! Then I found out that our vitamin gummies had come in so I had to give one a try. We don't take two since we're underweight! But they weren't bad; they just had a slightly different texture than normal gummies. Overall, they were pretty good, and hopefully, I will enjoy a new flavor of gummy tomorrow! After that, I chilled until I started my chemo at 9:00 Am. During chemo, I watched reels and listened to good music! I Watched some Owl House and then got some brunch (breakfast for dinner). I had a sausage biscuit and eggs with ketchup (don't hate me..). After a while, I was done with the dishes, but two big knives almost cut my big toe. I'm thankful those knives didn't cut my big toe! And I also had esophagus surgery which sucks, but thankfully, I didn't experience any pain! Today made me smile!

Sunday, 8/18/24 - today, I woke up latish around 9:00 P.m. I watched a couple of shows and chilled the majority of the day. We finally got Luz into some jeans, and I got a cool new fancy outfit! It certainly made me smile! Although our friend Emmie overheated and needed the emergency aid bag which sucks since I had overheated ok Friday :( that's the rough part of being a Quadriplegic and then we took the second vitamin gummy! I tasted a new flavor and it might be my favorite so far! And currently, we're listening to music, and later on tonight, we're going bowling 🎳! With our friends but I'll go ahead and post this weekly smiles now so I won't forget 😅! But hitting the third weekly smiles! made me smile! Have a great day everyone!

What made you smile this week?

Img desc #1: shows Doc and Emmie at an event. Emmie, seen right of the image, is wearing a black short-sleeved shirt and grey jeans with black shoes! Emmie's arm is resting on the side of Doc's electric wheelchair. Emmie is in her manual wheelchair doc, seen on the left of the image, smiling in a pink long-sleeved shirt and beige colored pants paired with dark brown shoes. Doc's atrophied hands are resting on the joystick of her electric wheelchair.

Img desc #2: Luz, her friend, is smiling while wearing a sleeved grey jacket over her white short-sleeved shirt paired with her shirt is her grey pants. Luz is wearing a cross necklace and is in her pink manual wheelchair.

Img desc #3: doc is seen with her head tipped back off of the brown headrest of her electric wheelchair docs right arm is seen propped up holding the right side of the purple pants that's on doc, doc's left arm is stretched out Infront of her doc is wearing a black short-sleeved buttoned up shirt and overly large purple pants that weren't sized down to her size!

Img desc #4: doc is seen in a comfy seat. Doc is frowning while wearing a grey shirt and grey sweatpants. Her atrophied arms are resting on her lap near her phone. It is dark in the room.

Img desc #5: doc is seen smiling away from the camera. She is wearing a pink long-sleeved shirt paired with a dark blue bowtie. She is wearing beige colored pants and dark brown shoes.

Img desc #6: doc is seen smiling at the camera while wearing a pink long-sleeved shirt paired with a blue bowtie. She is wearing beige colored pants and dark brown shoes.

Img desc #7: Emmie is seen looking down at the camera with a funny stare. She has a fork in her mouth, and there is a bowl of pasta. In front of her, she is wearing a white Hawaiian-themed shirt and grey shorts (covered by the table).

Img desc #8: Emmie is seen in a car. She is smiling with sunglasses on. She is wearing a white Hawaiian- short-sleeved shirt and grey shorts. On her lap is a red bungy cord she uses to go to the bathroom and her grey adaptive fork (since she has no finger function).

Img desc #9: doc is seen in a red short-sleeved shirt. She is staring at a lamp while near her laptop. Her Atrophied wrists are on top of each other, and the thumb of her left hand is near a blue cup that has a red straw in the cup she is giving a blank expression.

Img desc #10: doc is seen laying in bed with a white short-sleeved shirt that has colors and words on it but is mostly covered up by Doc's arms being crossed over her chest along with her white short-sleeved shirt she is wearing black/grey shorts she has no socks or shoes on and is laying near a white lab dog and giving a bright smile towards the camera moments before doing a Catheterization or overheating!

[wanderlust1979]

Rating:

PG-13

Fandom:

The Rookie

Relationships:

Tim Bradford/Lucy Chen

Characters:

Tim Bradford Lucy Chen John Nolan

It’s a Tuesday like any other, except it isn’t. Lucy has an OB appointment in a couple hours. The Dr.’s going to check everything is progressing as it should. They are also going to find out if they are having a boy or a girl. They talked about not finding out, like Angela and Wesley did, but they’ve both decided to forgo waiting and find out now.

Tim’s nerves are on edge. He and Lucy haven’t told anyone yet. Well besides Grey, who was ridiculously happy for them and has had Lucy on special assignment since her 6 week checkup when Dr.s suggested a lighter work load for her pregnancy. Everything had been good, not great, with the pregnancy and they were listening to their Dr. and taking advise seriously.

There was a high profile political figure in town this week so it was all hands on deck. Tim was going to have to miss the appointment today and it was killing him. Lucy assured him it would be fine and deep down he knew it would be, but he hates not being there for her. Not being by her side and holding her hand when the Dr reveales their child’s sex to them.

Tim was pulled from him thoughts when he and Nolan got a call over the shops radio. Shot fired, officers in distress and RA requested to scene, along with additional units. Tim and Nolan jumped into action.

——————-

3 hours went by in a flash. Once things had calmed down enough for Tim to take stock of how much time had passed. “Damn” Tim cursed as he realized he has missed a call from Lucy.

“You good?” Nolan asked as he looked over at Tim after he had spoke.

“Yeah,” Tim said in frustration “just missed a call from Lucy.” He was annoyed with today.

“How is Lucy? Feels like I haven’t seen her in weeks.” Nolan asked

Tim smiled to himself “She’s good. Killing it on special assignment.” Their own private joke, him and Lucy. Yeah she was on special assignment, but the real special assignment was their baby.

“Hey give me 10 minutes, I’m gonna give Lucy a quick call before we head back out.” Nolan nodded to Tim as he walked off towards the shop to wait for Tim.

Tim pulled up his FaceTime app to call Lucy. After a couple rings her beautiful face came up on his screen. “Hey baby, sorry I missed your call, we were on call.” He quickly followed up with “it’s all clear, Nolan and I just came in at the end to help clean up a little mess. All good!”

He didn’t miss the quick look of relieve that passed Lucy’s face. She worries when she wasn’t on his 6.

A soft smile speeded across her face as she held up an envelop in front of her face. “What you got there?” Tim asked with excitement in his voice.

“I didn’t want to know 1st. I had the Dr write down the sex of our baby so we could find out together.” She watched Tim’s save go through a range of emotions.

“I love you!” Was his response.

A smile to match his own appeared on her face. “I love you too!” She waved the envelop around. “Should we look?” She arched her eyebrow in question.

“YES!” He said with a bit too much excitement, but he didn’t care. He was dying to know.

Lucy used her phone hand to help hold the envelope as she opened the envelope. “You know it doesn’t matter, either way, boy or girl, we’ll love this baby,”

“But?” Tim prompted.

“But, do you have a preference? Do you want a boy vs a girl or vice verses?” Lucy bit her lip nervously as she waited for his answer.

He gave her a smile that said, she was a silly women, “No. whatever this child is, girl or boy, it’s ours. It’s a piece of each of us. I will love it with every fiber of my soul.” His mind is flashing images of him and Lucy and this unknown baby. The future they will have. The love and life they will share. He can feel himself tearing up. He shacks his head to get his focus back. “Ok, so open it. I’m dying to know.”

Lucy smiles at him, following his train of thought. Wanting what the same things he does. Knowing what he’s thinking, where his mind had gone. She pulls the slip of paper from the envelope and tears of joy spring to her eyes as she registers what she’s reading. She turns the piece of paper she’s holding towards Tim. “Our little girl is going to be the luckiest little girl having you as a daddy.” Tears are streaming down her face.

His breath catches in his throat. A girl. He’s gonna be a dad to a little girl. His little girl. His and Lucy’s child. He knew, he just knew this little girl was going to be beautiful like her mother. He could see her now. His heart was growing in his chest, in excitement and in love.

“Sergeant Bradford we’ve got a call!” Nolan called from the shop.

Tim grimaced, “Baby I gotta run, we’ve got a call. I love you. I’ll see you tonight and we will celebrate!” Tim’s rushing now, knowing he has to take the call. “I love you baby. You have made me the happiest man alive!” He smiled at her, it’s filled with so much love he thinks he might burst.

Lucy is smiling at him like a dope, “I love you too Tim,” she sobers slight, “be careful. Tell Nolan I’ll kick his ass if anything happens to you, even a small scratch.” She’s smiling at him at the end of the conversation.

He’s smiling at her now too. “I always am!” He sends her a wink before ending the call and walking to the shop.

As he slides into the drivers seat of the shop and turns the vehicle on he absently says to Nolan “ Hey, when you thought about learning how to braid hair.” He sees confusion on John’s face. “Before you knew if Henry was a boy or girl” a look crosses John’s face as he remembers a comment he once made to Tim as they were riding together his rookie year. John nods his head in affirmation. “How does one go about learning to braid hair?”

Tim is pulling out into traffic as John begins to speak. “Back then, I’d probably have had to have my wife teach me.” John continues to think fondly of that memory and the possibilities that could have been.

Tim is focus in the here and now, “yeah but today I’m sure there’s some video online I could watch” he says forgetting he isn’t with someone who know about Lucy’s pregnancy.

John looks over at Tim in confusion, “I guess. But why would you need to learn how to…” realization washes over John. “Oh, my, sir, congratulations!” John finishes with a smile on his lips.

Tim looks over a John and smiles. Probably the biggest smile Tim has ever shown in his whole life. “Thanks man!”

Don’t worry he will continue to smile like that from now on.

[loveandscience]

been in and out of intense anxiety the last couple days, so maybe writing it here will help

Okay so my old dentist who I loved retired, and gave his practice over to a new guy. Tuesday, I went to try out the new dentist and very loudly in the next room while I had my teeth cleaned, he was telling someone how they didn't need a crown or something because God designed the perfect teeth system?????

And as soon as he introduces himself to me, he out of the blue goes on about a "beautiful sermon I heard" on the way to work, and how this really ill woman had so much faith that she would just get better, and that she "touched Jesus" and was instantly healed. I'm sitting there with his sharp tools in my mouth and he's going on a religious rant and what the fuck am I going to do? He does tell me I have 2 cavities, then overcharges me for the cleaning and "exam."

Decided I really needed a new fucking dentist, and thankfully my friends suggested some to try. So Wednesday, I called a place and they got me in, and they were so nice and professional and I really liked them! They did another exam on me and apparently the last dentist (maybe the one before, too) had missed an entire fucking dead tooth???? It's been discolored for years but old dentist never thought it was an issue... Apparently it's dead and needs a root canal. Who the fuck knows how long it's been dead. Terrifying. Also they say it's 3 cavities not 2.

Anxious about the root canal, I've never had one, and it's so expensive. The same day I have my root canal, I also am driving somewhere I've never been an hour away to see my new liver doctor, and that's also terrifying.

On top of those expenses, I'm hoping to sign kiddo up for Brazilian Jiu Jitsu lessons bc I think it'll be really good for them and they are really interested.

But I've also had several clients transition to every other week or end, which is good they're doing better. I also have less income though so need to market again for new clients. Husband was planning to increase his income by taking classes paid for by work, but the classes are taking so long that I wouldn't be surprised if it takes all year, which is not what we'd hoped for a timeline.

Pet Day at kiddo's school is coming up and last year's Pet Day, we brought our cat who ended up dying shortly after. He had cancer which obviously wasn't caused by Pet Day, but I do think he picked up a virus which might have exacerbated the cancer. I'm planning to make sure every kid sanitizes their hands before touching the cat we bring this time, and bringing the young healthy one instead of the old frail one. Still some anxiety.

Wanted to take kiddo to this snow place in FL this weekend, but tickets plus parking are 100 dollars, yikes. So been incredibly anxious about that. Just before clicking buy I checked and it's supposed to be thunderstorms that day, so texted the friend we were planning to go with and hoping we can put that off... Really anxious they might have already bought tickets even though they said they'd wait til after I bought ours (maybe they could pick up on my anxiety around committing, idk).

So the common theme, laying these all out, seems to be financial. Which is sad, because I wanted to scale back on work and be able to rest more and focus on my health, but with husband not likely to be making much more money any time soon, it means I need to work more hours. Which is hard with the amount of dr appointments I'm going to have to be having.

At least... I got a little while of getting to work out almost daily and rest up.

[hillhouses]

-.-

i’m so nervous about this dr’s appointment on tuesday ): i’m mostly worried that they won’t be able to tell me anything or that they’ll outright say it isn’t what i think it is which means starting back from square one and still having to deal with all of this pain while not knowing what causes it. and i know i’m more than likely going to need a follow up appointment to do bloodwork as the best case scenario and surgery as the worst case. i’m just so anxious and i hope what’s wrong with me is what i think it is but also i don’t because that’s such a terrible illness. but i’ve had so many consistent symptoms for so long and they’ve gradually gotten worse which is. the definition of a chronic illness. and all of my symptoms can be ticked down a checklist. i’m just so so scared. and on top of this i’m drowning in work and responsibilities that i don’t even want anymore and having to reassess what it is that i’m really passionate about anymore. and i have $20 in my account and don’t get paid for 2 more weeks lol. i just want everything to stop

[vividfantasydreamer]

One Shot? Idk

“Yeah..yeah I know I’ll be there soon.” I reply hanging up the phone as I pull into the parking lot; I was having a bad enough day as it was my washer broke last night, and I nearly got t-boned this morning by two assholes street racing. Only to be followed up by a call from my doctor that I need to see him immediately. I push through the glass double doors. It was a small but comfy clinic thankful for my job’s insurance to pay for it.

“Ally! I didn’t expect to see you today.” Tina greets me as I walk up to the desk. “What brings you in?”

“Er…Dr.Vin asked me to come in..? He said something about it being ‘urgent’.” I say showing her the appointment confirmation text message “I was supposed to come Friday but he decided to move it.” I shrug, she hums tapping away on her computer.

“Ah, yes I see it now. It was updated a few minutes ago. Sorry about that, I will let him know you are here.” I nod taking a seat in the waiting room this clinic only had four doctors and four nurses, twelve rooms total to call it a clinic might be generous but I have been coming here since I was little. Most of the doctors here know me like family. It's something I always loved about this place.

“Hey, when did Virin get back I thought he left to go do some contracts across the country years ago.”

“He came back about a month ago.” Tina replies tapping her nails on the desk “I’ll be honest I thought I was seeing ghosts when he walked through the door. You can’t just up and leave like that I was planning his going away party!” she moans. I chuckle as she pulls the folder out, taking a seat next to me to show me. “See! He was supposed to get this big party with all his patients! And he was supposed to get drunk.”

“He’s not a drinker.”

She sighs “A girl can dream can’t she?” I snort shoving her gently, Tina had drunken blackmail on just about everyone that’s ever walked through those doors; lord only knows how a party girl like her got to be a psychologist.

“You’re terrible.” say ruffling her hair; she grabs my cheek pinching it.

“What did your mother tell you about respecting your elders?” she asks I whine begging for her to let go when someone coughs off to the side.

“Viin.” I greet waving at him the woman now has both cheeks “Aoww, stup.”

“Tina, please.” Virin walks up to us removing the womans’ hands “I’m sure Ms. Bell is busy; we shouldn’t keep her.” with a pout Tina returns to her desk.

“Fine, but you owe me a drink. We were having so much fun.” she says as i’m lead into the back.

“So your finally back? Hah, never thought i’d see you again, figured you went off to go be some big shot doctor.”

“And leave behind my favorite patient? Never.” he answers as i’m lead into the farthest room, the clinic was strangely empty today, Roe, Wix and Mander seem to be the only ones here. “Please get up on the table.”

“Favorite you say? Even when I vomited on your new shoes?” I jest, hopping onto the exam table looking around the room. It looks different…i’m not sure how but it’s just enough to put me off.

“You were sick it’s understandable.” he says taking a seat in the rolling chair, he logs into the computer.

“H-hey, um by the way where’s Ava, and Lulu? I know they usually work tuesdays right? Or are they sick?” I inquire, looking around the room hoping to find what feels wrong.

“No, they were just given the day off. It’s a slow day so we didn’t see any reason to keep them here.”

‘I guess that makes sense.’ I shrug “But then why have Dr. Mander and everyone else here then? Surely you guys could do with a day off as well.”

“How considerate of you.” he smiles still looking at the screen “Don’t worry we all love our jobs so there is no such thing as ‘over-worked’.” 

“Oh, okay.” We spend the next few minutes in silence, the room fairly well insulated from the noise or lack-there-of from the corridor outside. The room has a large wall sized window to look out into the small garden the usual roses and lily’s grow there, climbing ivy tangles it’s way up the bricks of the building giving it an almost fantasy-esk look. “So, uh…what is so urgent? I know I was feeling a little under the weather a while ago but Dr. Roe said he would get back to me with the results.” I get no answer from Virin as he continues to type away on the computer, after a few more minutes I clear my throat hoping to get his attinsion. “D-doctor?” still no answer.

‘Am I really that soft spoken? I know he can hear me. . .have I gone mute?! No, wait, not possible, I'm stupid.’ I clear my throat again this time he hums his acknowlagement.

“Soo, why am I here again? If this can wait until friday I don’t mind, I have some vaccinations set up for them as well.” I say the silence is starting to get awkward.

“Sorry, I was distracted.” he apologizes rolling over to me “To save you time we can do the shots today.” I grimace a shiver going up my spine.

“I’d rather not. I-”

“You don’t like needles, I know. But the sooner this gets done the sooner. I was just looking up your medications, Dr. Roe prescribed you clomid to help with your fever?”

“Yeah. Must be new. I never had to take that antibiotic before. Didn’t think an ear infection got that bad.”

“They can get far worse, if it gets bad enough it can cause you to lose hearing in the effected ear.” virin continues as he rolls over to me “I’m going to take off your shoes.” he says I nod letting him slip off my tennis shoes sliding them next to the exam table.

“So I guess the scan came back pretty bad then?” I remember three weeks when I was here Roe had pushed for a scan of my inner ear before saying something along the lines of ‘Good thing we caught this.’ before sending me home with a months’ worth of antibiotics.

“Yes.” he replies as dr. Wix walks in with a tray of needles. “Perfect timing. I was just about to start the exam.” the brunette said putting on his stethoscope, he slips his hand under my shirt. “Breath in.”

I do as he instructs, Roe sets up a small rolling metal table with the tray one of the needles looking particularly scary. I wave him hello as I go through the motions of my exam.

“You sound alright.” Virin says putting down is stethoscope “Say Ahhh.” I open my mouth as he depresses my tongue, the taste of wood assaults my taste buds as he looks around inside my mouth. “Perfect. You're doing great.” I nod keeping an eye on the syringe tray, ust being in the same room as those things makes me uncomfortable.

“Hey, uh…maybe we can do this another time. I- uh…i’m not feeling too hot.” I say, roe walks over to me climbing onto the table as well strong arms wrap around me pulling me close to his body.

“Your five months past due of these, I know you don’t like needles but you need these to stay healthy.” Virin reasons as I try to wiggle free of roe’s grasp.

“I havn’t had to be held down in ages, Vin. Come’on maybe only two today?”

“You’ll be fine.” Virin says Wix and Mander coming in as well. “Thank you for your help guys.”

“Causing trouble as usual Abs?” Mander jokes moving to grab my legs, I can feel myself starting to panic as virin upcaps the first needle.

“Haha y-you know me, always on the move.” I say through gritted teeth trying to squirm free; Wix holds me from the side.

“Just relax. It’ll only take a second.” Mander reassures as I being to thrash, their holds tighten as I try to escape virin calmly watching from the side until I tire myself out.

“Hey- guys! Come on~ you know this dosen’t have to happen. Right…Right??” I plead panting “We should do this a different day! Sounds good to me!” Virin sticks me as I go to take a breath. I must admit i’d never noticed how strong these guys were under their clothes but being presses into roe’s front I could tell he was ripped. It probably paid when they had to deal with patients like me.

“There’s only seven, you’ll live.” Wix comments her  grip suffocating.

‘SEVEN!? OH, no, no, no I do NOT need that many.” I rebuttal, mander now putting his full weight on my legs. Before I get a chance to protest Virin sticks me with another, my body starting to feel heavy.

“Guys, guys I think i’m going to pass out.” I pant my heart still racing ‘Oh how I wish I already was, this would go quicker then.’ Roe leans back pulling me down with him, the next shot I can see out of the corner of my eye the needle is large far larger than anything they’ve ever used on me before. I feel lightheaded and weak but I still fight i’m able to pull one of my legs free and kick mander in the shoulder; but he barely reacts my blows landing but they don’t seem to be doing anything. “Please….let..me…” The pain from the next shot hurts, it hurts alot but words fail me as the world starts to fade in and out. Wix is the first to let go of me the fight leaving my body as I being to fall limp.

“Good girl, sleep. Don’t fight it.” are the last words I hear from Virian before passing out.

=================================

“Virin, your going to get us in trouble doing that.” Roe says sitting up he places their darlings’ body on the table. “She damn near had a heart attack.”

“She’ll be fine.” Virin says as he goes to wash his hands, Wix digs through her pack finding the pill bottle.

“She’s taken most of it.” She says counting the remaining pills “Twice a day? Really? Poor thing must be dying of heat.” she scolds tracin her hand up abby’s stomach.

“Won’t matter soon.” Mander butts in undressing her “We’ll have to burn these.”

“Tina-” Wix starts before the woman in question walks in.

“Don’t worry, I’ve taken care of everything.” she says leaning on the door way “You guys sure played the long game on this one. My offer still stands.”

“We can condition her ourselves.” Virin says bundling their darlings clothes into a bag “How is your sweetheart doing by the way?”

“Fine, he had this crazy idea that I was drugging him to make him more compliant.” she groans, it did pain her slightly to know that Abby would be a completely different person when she saw her again but understood where they were coming from. “Think I can get one last goodbye?”

“We’re not killing her.” Wix says playing with their darlings hair, pitch black strands slip between her fingers.

“I know, I know.” Tina sighs pushing off the doorway “But we were friends still.”

“You aren’t having a change of heart are you?” Roe asks raising his brow at her “You know-”

“I know, you don’t have to remind me.” she says backing off “Sorry, forget I said anything.”

“We should close the clinic for today.” Virian suggests the other agree forcing Tina to leave the room. She just had to lock the door there were no other patients today, it was a special day after all. It was their darling’s ‘gotcha day’. After closing out the lights she says her goodbyes and leaves.

“Looks like our little girl had plans today.” Wix says showing the others the recent text messages.

“Who’s that? I haven’t see his number before.” Virin says squinting at the screen.

“Liam, you’ve been gone to long Vin. he’s her long distance boyfriend.” Roe comments “This would be their tenth year dating.”

“That’s a long time….Shame.” Mander says stretching “He’s not good enough for her anyway. But just be sure to get him out of the picture.” he bends down, nosing their between thor darlings legs.

“Restrain yourself. This is no place for that.” Roe reprimands, Wix heads to the security room to wipe any video evidence. “Help me get her wrapped before we head out. She’s going to be very confused.” Mander helps in securing their darling, Virin giving one last injection before they nestle her into the back of Wix’s blacked out car.

“Everything’s taken care of.” Wix says getting into the driver's seat, Virin sliding into the passenger seat. They drive off towards Viran’s house, the perfect place for them to start their life.

[arkhai]

From the Archives: Two Tales of Revolution

I have many, terribly conflicting personal feelings about Independence Day, but I thought I'd take a moment, for those of you who are interested and looking to read some history today, to share some of my recent archival work related to the American Revolution and the beginnings of the war for independence. Below are two different accounts of the same event, which was the March 7th sacking of the British vessel The Fortune, which ferried trade goods across the Atlantic. By this time the Boston Tea Party had already been carried out, but smaller attacks on shipping brigantines and warehouses continued for several months afterwards. You may find the attackers' M.O.s familiar.

The first excerpt is comprised of two entries from John Adam's diary, one of decent detail and from the day before the incident and one from afterwards, its body suspiciously short. The second is a lengthier insurance statement recorded by Ezekiel Price, a Boston notary and insurer, who dealt with the aftermath of the destruction. What are the purposes of each entry? What function do they serve, and what do their authors want us to know (or to not!) about what took place? It is my hope that when you read, you think about whose perspectives our history books record, the process of mythologizing national history, and how we might capture what the Revolution more broadly meant to colonial residents and British subjects across the Atlantic who had a stake, but perhaps not a say, in the direction the colonies that became America would take.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

1774 SUNDAY MARCH 6TH.

Heard Dr. Cooper in the Morning. Paine drank Coffee with me.

Paine is under some Apprehensions of Troops, on Account of the high Proceedings, &c. He says there is a ship in to day, with a Consignment of Tea from some private Merchants at home -- &c.

Last Thursday Morning March 3d. died Andrew Oliver Esquire Lieutenant Governor. This is but the second death which has happened among the Conspirators, the original Conspirators against the Public Liberty, since the Conspiracy was first regularly formed, and begun to be executed, in 1763 or 4. Judge Russell who was one, died in 1766. Nat. Rogers, who was not one of the original's, but came in afterwards, died in 1770

This Event will have considerable Consequences. -- Peter Oliver will be made Lieutenant Governor, Hutchinson will go home, and probably be continued Governor but reside in England, and Peter Oliver will reside here and rule the Province. The Duty on Tea will be repealed. Troops may come, but what becomes of the poor Patriots. They must starve and mourn as usual. The Hutchinsons and Olivers will rule and overbear all Things as usual.

An Event happened, last Fryday that is surprising. At a General Council, which was full as the General

Court was then sitting, Hutchinson had the Confidence to Nominate for Justices of the Peace, George Bethune, Nat. Taylor, Ned. Lloyd [Lyde], Benj. Gridly and Sam Barrett -- and informed the Board that they had all promised to take the oath.

The Council had the Pusillanimity to consent by their Silence at least to these Nominations.

Nothing has a more fatal Tendency than such Prostitution of the Council. They tamely, supinely, timorously, acquiesce in the Appointment of Persons to fill every executive Department in the Province, with Tools of the Family who are planning our Destruction.

Neighbour Quincy spent the Evening with me.

1774. TUESDAY MARCH 8.

Last Night 28 Chests and an half of Tea were drowned.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

{Province of the 

Massachusetts Bay 

Boston} By this Public Instrument of Protest be it known and made manifest that on the Eighth day of March A.D. 1774 in the Fourteenth year of his Majesty's Reign Personally came and appeared before me Ezekiel Price notary and tabellion public by Royal authority admitted and sworn Dwelling and practicing in Boston aforesaid Benjamin Gorham Master of the Brigantine named the Fortune Reuben Hall mate George Towns and Thomas Stanley Mariners belonging to the said Brigantine who manifested and Declared upon Oath-

That on Sunday the sixth day of March instant the said Brigantine arrived in the harbor of Boston aforesaid from London in Great Britain Laden with Goods and Merchandize upon Freight- that at about eight of the Clock in the Evening of the next day the said Brigantine being then at a Wharfe in Boston aforesaid a great Number of Persons all of whom were unknown to the appearers and many of them disguised and dressed and talking like Indians armed with axes and Hatchets with force and Violence entered on Board said Vessel and demanded of the mate to show in what part of said vessel a quantity of tea was stored which he refused they immediately with force and Violence broke open the Hatches of said vessel and forced the Mate down into the Hold and proceeded to romage the Hold and to hoist Twenty eight Chests and an half of Tea upon the Deck of said Vessel and then with Hatchets axes clubs etc. and broke open the said chests of tea and emptied & threw the same tea over the side of the Vessel into the Water and likewise hoisted up several Casks of goods and a quantity of Hemp upon the Deck of said Vessel and the appearers know not but that other parts of the Cargo may have been destroyed on board or thrown over in the water or carried away from said Vessel at the time aforesaid- And the appears add that during the time the said Persons were on Board said Vessel doing the damage aforesaid they used their utmost endeavors to prevent the same but the greatness of their Number and their being Armed as aforesaid rendered every Attempt fruitless some of them were Wounded in their aforesaid Endeavors and Attempts. 

Wherefore the said Appearers in behalf of themselves and the rest of the Mariners belonging to the said Vessel also in Behalf of the Owners of said Vessel Freighters and all others any wise interested or concerned in said Vessel or her Cargo or any part thereof have desired of me the said notary of protest. I Do therefore hereby solemnly Protest against the said Persons who entered the said Vessel with force and Violence as aforesaid broke Damaged and Destroyed the Tea aforesaid or any part of the Cargo after said for all losses Costs Damages and Disappointments which has happened or accrued or which may happen or accrue unto any person or persons any wise Interested or Concerned therein-

Benj. Gorham

Reuben Hall

George Towns

Thos. Stanley

Thus Done and protested in Boston aforesaid the day and year aforesaid- In promisiorum fidem

 E.Z. Price not. pub. 

Boston March 8th 1774 recorded 

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Excerpts from Adams' diary courtesy of the Massachusetts Historical Society.

Excerpts from Ezekiel Price's records courtesy of the Boston Athenaeum, which houses Price's notary books. I am grateful for both their immense efforts in protecting these documents, as well as their efforts to ensure that they remain accessible to both scholars and the public.

[six-of-ravens]

well, as far as I can tell I'm not getting my period and I've been eating enough protein, so I'm forced to assume the stress of Everything is what's making me nearly cry at 10am on a Tuesday.

just a big circle of:

-> need to make sure I'm a good employee bc there are soooo many tech layoffs now

-> prices going up so need to keep a well-paying job to maintain basic fucking freedoms

-> parents keep making appointments they can't get to (dad in my hometown instead of a city hospital, mom having to have recurring appointments during the time when everyone's working bc the dumb clinic is only open till 2:30)

-> dad has discovered if he moans about how hard something is going to be for weeks eventually I'll offer to do it just to shut him up, I know there's probably no alternative to me, but I wish he'd just ask like a fucking adult

-> need to accommodate those without making my boss mad or making him think I'm taking time off to interview at other places, unsure if telling him I'm helping my parents out makes this better or worse, bc he definitely doesn't come from a "my parents are in their early 60s which means they're basically my children now" family

-> also need to book my own appointments which are usually rare and easy to schedule but have backed up due to being sick and having to reschedule, and also having my prescription run out for the first time in 1.5 years and having to find a new family dr

-> repeat ad infinitum

[fowlofprey]

You stare down at your fairy communicator, inverted into your palm. You've been sitting here for quite a while now, ever hesitant to input the contact information for the call that you must make.

"If I don't do it now, then I never will," you mutter to yourself, brows knitted tightly in frustration with yourself.

The fingers of your other hand are tapping rapidly on your leg. Without at all intending to, your subconscious, focusing on the movement to distract yourself from the task at hand, begins counting to the rhythm. One, two, three, four, five, one, two, three-- no, stop that right now, you forcefully interrupt that train of thought before it becomes too much, horrified with how easily you've managed to slip back into that habit, if even for only a moment.

The fear that the compulsions could become truly uncontrollable again is what ultimately pushes you to finally make the call.

You sit in silence for a few moments more while the communicator connects to its target, and you suppress a sigh of relief when the face of one Dr. Jerbal Argon appears as a hologram in your hand.

"Hello, Artemis," says the doctor. "I wasn't expecting a call; what can I do for you?"

"Good morning, Doctor," you greet him in return. "I, ah... I know that our next appointment is not for some months, but..." Dr. Argon nods encouragingly, patiently waiting for you to continue. You sigh and wring your free hand through your hair, trying to find your words and make sure that they make sense. Trying and failing not to count them. "...I'm afraid I may be beginning to feel ill again."

Ten words. That's good. No, that's bad. You told yourself to stop counting, so why did you do it anyway? Your fear and exhaustion must be clear on your face, because the good doctor looks sympathetic when he voices what you didn't say.

"So you'd like to come in sooner, then, I take it?" he asks, and you nod wordlessly. "Alright. Can you tell me how bad it is right now?"

You nod, again, before you remind yourself that you need to actually answer this question. "Yes, of course. It's not as bad as it was at its worst; the most debilitating symptom as of right now is the anxiety-- it's driven me to insomnia."

You hear the sound of typing as Dr. Argon nods along. "I see. And what about the other symptoms? The paranoia, the compulsions. The delusions, are those back?"

"Only the compulsions. I've managed to keep them under control for the most part, but..." you force yourself to continue the sentence, "it's becoming harder."

More typing. "Okay," the doctor says. "So it seems like you should come back in as soon as possible, before your symptoms get much worse. Let me check what my earliest availability is..." There is even more typing as he checks his schedule. Some clicking, and then a sigh. "It looks like I'm all booked up for this week. The earliest I can get you in is... next Tuesday, at ten. Will that work for you?"

"Yes, that will be fine. Thank you, Doctor."

He nods. "Of course. And in the meantime, do your best to take care of yourself. You mentioned insomnia; that's likely exacerbating all of your other problems. Try your best to get some rest, even if it's just lying down and not sleeping. Anything is better than nothing."

You nod.

"And I'll let you know if I get any cancellations to see if I can get you in sooner, alright?"

Another nod.

"Well, then. I'll see you next week, if not sooner. Stay safe, alright?"

"I will. Thank you."

"Bye, then, Artemis."

"Goodbye."

After the call, you're feeling even more exhausted, somehow, but relieved all the same. It's good that you managed to reach out, you tell yourself, as you return your communicator ring back to its proper position on your finger. You'll be feeling better again soon.

A knock at your door startles you from your thoughts. "Yes?" you call.

It's Butler who opens the door. "I've just come up to tell you that breakfast is ready, sir."

"I see, thank you. Allow me to get dressed, and I'll be right down."

Butler nods, but doesn't go anywhere just yet. Concern is drawn plain on his face.

"...Yes, Butler?"

"Oh, it's nothing, it's just..." he pauses for a moment, seemingly searching for the right words. "Are you... doing okay, Artemis?"

The half-smile you'd plastered on your face with Butler's arrival drops with a sigh. "You heard my call with Dr. Argon, didn't you," you say.

"It was hard not to," he says in defense of his eavesdropping. "But it's not just that. We've all noticed you haven't quite been yourself recently. You're quieter than usual, and no offense, sir, but you look dead on your feet."

Your humorless laugh does nothing to ease Butler's worries. "Has it really been that noticeable? Well..." you stand, and motion for Butler to close the door behind himself, which he does.

"Truthfully, no, I'm not feeling well," you continue as you meet Butler where he is, and place a reassuring hand on his shoulder. "But fear not, my friend, for I will be myself again soon." You hope that the smile you give him reaches your eyes, but something in Butler's expression tells you it doesn't.

"If you say so," he says with a sigh of his own. "But you know that you don't have to keep these things to yourself, right? You can talk to us, Artemis. We'll understand."

"Of course. I know you will. I just don't want to trouble you all with my own problems, that's all." It sounds unconvincing even to you, but still you turn towards your closet and open it to choose an outfit for the day, an admittedly transparent attempt to end the conversation. "Now, if you'll excuse me..."

"You wouldn't be troubling us at all," Butler begins to reply, but knows that you're done talking as soon as you've turned around. He sighs again. "Alright, I'll see you in a bit, then," he says, and then leaves you alone once more.

[tenacioustragedyobject]

Hey friends!

Good news!

Tl;dr I got my Testosterone!!!

I thought you guys might want to know about the process I went through to get it because it was a hassle and a half! Before I start, I had some issues with Planned Parenthood but I am not trying in any way to condemn them. People make mistakes which is fine and I just happened to be on the end of that.

So, first off, I made an appointment with Planned Parenthood to start HRT. The staff was wonderful and worked with me to get the dosage I wanted. Awesome!

So, they sent the prescription off to my pharmacy, told me it'd be ready that day, and I went that evening to see if I could pick it up.

Pharmacy tells me there's no prescription in the system for me and that I need to call my prescriber. I call Planned Parenthood and the person on the phone tells me there's been an error and that it was never sent over, then they switched me to another person who said they did send it over and I needed to talk to the pharmacy. Okay…

So, I go back to the pharmacy and talk to a different person who says they do have it on file and it'll be ready in 40 minutes. Great! Twenty minutes later, the pharmacy person says that they can't fill it because insurance hasn't approved it. Okay…

So, I call insurance and they tell me that I need prior authorization from my primary care doctor (not the person who prescribed it). Well, my doctor's office is closed for the night but I can send a message on the app and they'll get back to me when they can.

So, I leave a message and the next morning a nurse replies that they can do it but they may need to refer me to endocrinology which could take a week or longer.

So, I wait the rest of the day and then the weekend (they're closed on the weekend) and on Monday I get a call from a different nurse who basically told me that they can't give me prior authorization because they didn't prescribe it in the first place. Okay…

So, I call back my insurance for clarification and they tell me that the prior authorization can be from my primary care doctor OR the doctor who prescribed it.

So, I call Planned Parenthood again and they send it off to the prior authorization department and tell me it could take 24 hours to get through to insurance and insurance told me it would take 24 hours to approve once they got prior authorization so that's another couple days I need to wait. Okay…

So, on Tuesday, I get a call from my dad who's at the pharmacy asking if I have a prescription that requires a needle and I'm like yup 👍 and he's like cool, I'm picking it up for you right now. Yay! I have a really long day and don't get home until like 9pm and when I get home I find the needles and syringes at my spot at the table, but no testosterone.

Now, the tricky part here is that I haven't actually told my family yet about the testosterone so at this point idk if my dad picked it up and is deliberately hiding it from me, picked it up and put it somewhere weird accidentally, or didn't pick it up at all or what. And I'm tired as all hell cause I usually go to bed at like 9pm and it's been a long day.

So, next morning, I call the pharmacy. They're still waiting on insurance. Okay, disappointed, but at least my dad didn't do something uncalled for.

So, I wait and wait and then on Friday I get a call from Planned Parenthood that my insurance denied me. Fuck…

But! The person from Planned Parenthood tells me that I do have other options! After talking with them I decide that um actually fuck insurance, I'll pay out of pocket for it I don't care. (Yes, I recognize that I'm privileged to be able to do that)

So, then they tell me that they need to slightly change the prescription to make sure the pharmacy will actually have it. Okay. Also, they're sending it to a different pharmacy so I can get it cheaper. Awesome!

So, I go to that pharmacy later and they don't have it. They have nothing on file for me. So I wait a couple days and still nothing. Call Planned Parenthood again, and it turns out they didn't send it to a different pharmacy, they sent it to my normal pharmacy who didn't call me to say they had it cause they thought it was waiting on insurance. Okay.

So, this morning, I go to my normal pharmacy and I ask for my prescription, they say it's waiting on insurance. I ask if I can pay out of pocket since my insurance is definitely not covering it. They say sure!

So, finally, they gave it to me! I had to pay more than I was expecting to pay but I got it and I can finally inject it tonight!

So yeah, it was a long process with several ups and downs and so many phone calls. But! I got my testosterone! It is in my grubby little hands and I get to take my first dose tonight finally!

And it is 100% worth the wait. But! I shouldn't have had to wait! We shouldn't have to jump through hoops to get HRT. I have never had to do this with any other medications!

Anyway, thanks so much for reading my rambling and I hope you have a lovely day and get any and all medications you need today!

[cocoelle]

Dr. Turner: It’s a pleasure to meet the both of you. Have a seat please and tell me how I can help you today.

Kane: We want to start a family.

Dr. Turner: Well you’ve come to the right place. So I like to know a little about my clients that I am going to help. Can you tell me a little about yourselves?

Morgan: I have a weekly podcast that I do, so if we are lucky enough to have a family together I would only have to work 1 or 2 days out of the week.

Dr. Turner: Wonderful, having a podcast sounds like an interesting job. What about yourself Kane?

Kane: Well to be completely honest Dr. Turner I’m a recovering addict, but I’ve been sober now for a little over two years. Recently due to some difficult circumstances, I realized that I was missing something in my life, and that was starting a family with the man I love.

Dr. Turner: Then let's see if we can help you both with starting a family.

Dr. Turner: The first thing we would need to discuss is which one of you will be the donor? Then they would have a fertility test done, just to make sure everything is good.

Kane: Well we have discussed this Dr. Turner and did a little research on our own and we were wondering if you offer split-cycle IVF?

Dr. Turner: Yes if that is something you wish to do that option is available. Now will you need help finding a donor and a surrogate? Or do you already have someone in mind?

Morgan: No that is something we would need some help with.

Dr. Turner: Now would you prefer an anonymous donor?

Morgan: I think we would prefer an anonymous donor.

Kane: Is there some sort of book we look through to pick a surrogate?

Dr. Turner: No haha, I would ask you both some questions. For example how involved you want to be with the pregnancy, like going to appointments and such. But that would be our next appointment if you wish to continue the process.

Kane: Yes we definitely want to continue Dr. Turner.

Dr. Turner: Fantastic I look forward to your next appointment with us. Joseph will set up an appointment for your fertility tests and next appointment with me. Joseph will also give you an information package on what to expect in the coming months.

Morgan: Thank you so much, Dr. Turner.

Receptionist: Ok we can have you come in on Friday at 2:15 for your fertility tests. And Tuesday at 11:30 for your next appointment with Dr. Turner.

Morgan: Dr. Turner said you would have an information package for us?

Receptionist: Yes, here is your information package. We will see you both on Friday.

Kane: I think that went really well, what do you think babe?

Morgan: Yeah it did go well hun. I can’t wait for the next step. Let's keep it to ourselves for now though ok?

Kane: Of course babe.

Previous / Next