#when inanimate objects win

[trashytracktales]

Have you seen the video of Lando walking into the wall 😭😭😭 I’m sorry pookie but I can’t stop laughing when I see new angles (please ram me like that and fuck me stupid sir)

GIRL THE THUD?? It echoes in my soul lmao. He walked into it with the full force of someone who’s never had a thought in his life 😭💀

[uhhhhhhhhh-ummmmmmmmm-trollge]

Hidden Lesbians attack

[lilacs-stash]

You guys know Taco manipulated Mic for money right? Like, you guys know that's what happened. She was literally just in it for the money?

[sixeyesonathiel]

satoru gets jealous of inanimate objects.

why is the pillow getting more hugs than him? why is your phone funnier than he is? why does the blanket get wrapped around you instead of him when he’s literally right there, built like a heater, available and desperate for affection? he’s six feet of love-starved muscle, and you’re choosing a glorified sack of cotton over him?

it’s not that he’s dramatic (he is). it’s not that he craves your attention like it’s oxygen (he does). it’s just that he knows he can do it better. he can be softer than your pillow. warmer than your blanket. funnier than your timeline. he has jokes, okay? and arms. and a body that you used to cling to like a koala in your sleep, so what happened to that? what changed? was it something he did? is this punishment? have you… outgrown him?

“you haven’t hugged me all day,” he sulks, chin digging into your shoulder, arms wrapped tight around your waist like a vice. “you hugged that stuffed animal for a solid ten minutes. is he funnier than me, too? is he taller? stronger? does he have an eight-pack?”

“he’s a bunny, satoru.”

“a ripped bunny, probably. emotionally intelligent. good with taxes. i bet he remembers anniversaries.”

he would know. he bought it. it was one of those claw machine wins at the arcade on your second date, the kind where he burned through twenty dollars like it was pocket lint until he finally, triumphantly, fished the floppy-eared thing out by the foot. he made you name it. declared it your shared child. called it his competition from day one. satoru even gave it a tiny ribbon scarf, because he said it needed to look presentable when it went toe-to-toe with him for your affection.

he was all smiles and smug winks back then—thought it was funny. he’s not laughing now.

because here he is, years later, still glaring at the bunny across the bed like it wronged him personally. like it’s out here stealing his wife. he swears it watches him with beady little judgmental eyes. plotting. scheming. waiting for the right moment to hop in and take his place.

“do you love it more than me?” he deadpans, already pulling you into his chest like he doesn’t want to hear the answer. dramatic gasp. “oh my god, you do. you love the bunny more. i’m losing to polyester stuffing.”

you roll your eyes, but he’s already burying his face into your neck, all whiny and clingy and hot breath against your skin like a puppy who hasn’t seen you in years. he makes a noise when you finally stroke his hair, a pleased little hum, arms squeezing tighter like he’s won a prize. like he’s claiming you back from his fuzzy rival. his biggest nemesis to date.

“this is better,” he mumbles. “way better.”

(pillow: -1. bunny: forever suspect. phone: on thin ice. satoru: smug as hell and back in his rightful place—in your arms.)

[yougavememyopia]

18+ NSFW, but it's clothed, sub yandere, mean afab reader, he falls between your legs and y'know, "master," degradation

Clumsy yandere, who constantly looked at you with lovesick eyes. Following you everywhere and basically worshipping the ground you walked on. Every item that you touched was sacred, added to his little shrine. Every angle of you was a picture in his poorly made scrapbook.

He'd accidentally bump his drink into random nobodies while he was busy trying to get a sniff of your divine scent. Frustrated that his clumsiness led him to losing sight of your fleeting figure.

You tried your best to ignore him. The loud thud of him falling over objects or his small "oof" when he bumped into walls never went unnoticed by you.

He'd instinctively apologize to the inanimate articles and walk away awkwardly. Ashamed of the attention he drew to himself.

You finally decided to confront him, getting tired of watching him trip over his shoelaces and timidly fleeing the scene. "What's the matter with you, huh? Why are you such a fucking klutz?"

He had no idea how to answer that. It was as if he was cursed to be so uncordinated ever since he was born. He chuckled and shrugged you off with a joke about bad luck. Hand brushing against yours while you helped him up. He had never felt so warm— his cheeks flushed scarlet as a heat wave traveled through his body, building awkward sweat.

You didn't understand how you managed to make his knees buckle with your mere presence. He'd trip over nothing, ending up injured at your feet. Looking up at you with glistened eyes and a dumb smile. It took everything in you to not step on his pitiful face.

"Guess you could say... I, uh, fell for you?" His laughter triggered another eye roll from you. It was truly pathetic how he thought that he could win you over one day. After all, his luck was bad. Very, very bad.

He kept getting caught by you doing the most unhinged things. Sniffing your dirty laundry. Stealing your useless trash. Lurking around your place at strange times.

Denying the truth from you always got him nowhere, so he'd try to confess over and over of how much he loved the little things about you. Sounding incoherent as he stumbled and jumped between words.

"I just can't– s-staying away from you is– I mean, I am sorry... a-a little? But you're like my master. N-no, wait, I... I didn't mean to say that–"

Loud drums of his heartbeat banged in his ear every time your eyes met. The repulsed look on your face making his stomach twist with glee. You were looking at him. Paying attention to him. He didn't deserve any of it. He truly didn't.

“I didn't do anything terrible this time! Just stole your straw. Is that bad?" He'd say in an ashamed voice— head down, eyes studying the ground. His sweaty, shaky fingers fiddled with each other as he waited for your verdict.

You forced him to throw the object in the bin. He felt orgasmic as you lectured him about his creepy behavior. The pure displeased look on your face giving him a high. Only if you knew the thoughts going on his head, you'd slap him without hesitation.

He had a detailed diary about all the little things about you that he loved. Each physical and personality characteristic was intricated in unusually specific details. Of course, his terrible curse led him to accidentally lose it at your place the first time he broke in.

Not only did he get an injury collapsing on your floor— running away when he heard your security system— but he also exposed you to his most disturbing private thoughts.

Pages and pages of your name and doodled hearts. I love you's and perverted fantasies written all over. Scribbles of how he wanted to carve your name into his skin with a knife. Feel you inside his veins. Finally belong to you and only you~♡.

You were disgusted. Particularly grossed out (and a bit turned on) at all the sexual positions he wrote about. The shameless smut written like he had already experienced it. Most of it about rough punishment that made your mouth agape.

No matter how hard you tried to avoid him after that, he was always there. With a weary expression and a bruised body. His fearful gaze had changed to something cloudy and crazed. Like at any point, he would break.

The tension between you grew each day, and so you invited him over to talk. Feeling the need to do something about the lustful glances exchanged.

Then he did it again— ruined everything with his clumsiness. He brought over a drugged drink. Your favorite flavor with an addition of something that'll aid in kidnapping. Before he could hand you it over, he collapsed on you. The cup spilled and flooded the ground, turning the tiles slippery.

When you opened your eyes, you found yourself to be okay. Sighing relief as no weird cliché kissing moment happened. Instead, warm breaths fanned your thighs. The clumsy yandere faced with a sight he had only imagined.

Your smell flooded his nose, and his eyes shut in ecstasy. He felt as if this was the best thing that could ever happen to him. Happy that his luck led him to the source of your scent. Moaning loudly without intent.

"I-I'm so sorry-" You could barely hear his muffle words, the vibration of his voice sending shivers right through you. Your thoughts unclear with the feeling of his mouth moving on your crotch. "S-so sorry."

"Nngh—" You let out a noise from the simulation. He wanted to move away but found himself unable to find the strength to. Your mind became hazy. A hand reaching down to hold his head there, earning a small whimper from him. "You... already made a fool of yourself. Use that mouth for something better and show me how sorry you are."

"...really? T-thank you! Thank you so much." That was all he needed to stop hesitantkng and create a wet stain on the fabric of your front. Whining each time his tongue felt a little bit of your private through the pants. He wanted nothing more than to rip your clothes off and taste you. "Please... please give me a chance to worship you like you deserve it. Keep me as a toy to use whenever you please. Please master-"

"-shut the fuck up already! I have no interest in you gross fantasies." You tugged on his hair and forced his flushed face to get as close as possible. His breathing hitched while you grinded against his tongue, making his pants feel tighter. But all his focus was on your voice. "Just make me come, you worthless creep."

Oh, how he loved when you spoke to him with such disgust in your tone. He wanted to serve you as best as he could, so maybe one day, he'll finally get the privilege of being praised.

[hebezuart]

Dark World designs for the Ghost Cousins, based on a story idea/half AU type deal I've been cooking up! More details under the cut ;)

Basically, after Tenna and MTT get a lot closer in the Light World, Tenna manages to convince him to create his own Dark World. Both because Tenna would really like to be able to interact with MTT properly (not being an inanimate object), but also... maybe Tenna will get to see his friends again. He's loved the companionship MTT has given him, but he can't help but feel like something's missing...

However, upon this Dark World being created, not only does MTT get trapped inside, but his cousins as well. Mads happened to be possessing a Mew Mew doll she'd found (stolen), and ended up entering the Dark World with that form. Blooky stays a ghost, of course. But, with MTT... Tenna, in a desperate attempt to win over more of his favor, pulls some metaphorical strings to have MTT's Dark World form draw from the various designs he's sketched out, buried deep in his closet...

The Dark World they enter, similar to what happens with Susie in Chapter 4, ends up being a... twisted and off-kilter version of TV World. This time, since it takes place inside the Ghost House, more specifically MTT's room, it's much more music themed, given his fascination with music videos. I'll be calling this place MTV World to differentiate.

Here, now that MTT has been given a proper body, Tenna starts bombarding him with a little too much attention. Throwing him in front of a roaring crowd, hot spotlights down on him, everything that he thinks MTT has been yearning for for years now. Which, yes, is technically true... but to be smacked in the face with it so suddenly? It's paralyzingly terrifying for him. He's never felt fear like this before, and can't do anything but freeze up on stage, the audience still raving. He's able to break away and run off stage, but he's verging on a full blown panic attack. Tenna, a little clueless and wanting to keep the crowd loud, simply takes his place on stage as MTT vanishes.

MTT can, to a degree, understand where Tenna is coming from with all of this, but Mads can definitely not. She curses about how they never should have let that thing into their house, to do such a terrible thing to her cousin, and now she wants payback.

...Blooky is along for the ride.

So, the Ghost Gang ventures through MTV World, playing through lots of minigames and music-themed challenges. MTT throughout tries to convince Mads that Tenna didn't mean any harm, but she's really not buying it... she wants to smash his stupid screen in. Blooky's mostly concerned that this might make them late for work tomorrow.

---

Some design notes about each of them:

MTT I struggled with the most, wanting him to look similar but not identical to his Undertale counterpart. His suit is reminiscent of his box form, and I thought he looked very cunty with the Rouge the Bat style boots. His weapon is a polearm, specifically a voulge, striking a perfect balance between 'keeping your distance' and 'getting just close enough to attack'. It's a metaphor for his anxiety and shyness. Super deep, I know.

Mads was honestly pretty easy, I just invoked Surge the Tenrec and a general boxing theme. Her brass knuckle boxing gloves have paw pads on the palms.

Blooky's design is referencing both the top hat they have in Undertale, and when you listen to music with them and trip out into space.

[chondrichthyes-x-mantodea]

Sooooo as someone going into fields that contain biology I think it's time we talk about how we see it from a fully male perspective. It's gotten to the point for me that I cannot listen to men talk biology, specifically reproduction. When we talk about male competition, we talk about it as "the right to mate". However this sees reproduction as a sentient, default specimen (male) doing to the secondary, inanimate vessel (female). In reality males fight for the CHANCE to win female attention. Females will forever be more selective sexually in the majority of animals. This is because females expend more energy in reproduction (the simple fact eggs are the larger gamete). Even in most fish, where care is commonly paternal, you will find heavy selection on the female side. Females are not fought over like an object to earn or "inseminate" the pure attention we give is what's fought over. Females almost always control their species. Look at tiger endlers. It may seem like the males harass females, but females actually CHOOSE exactly which sperm they concieve with and retain sperm for up to a year (trust me I have SEEN it myself). There's also this notion that males are all about genetics while female is about love or is about being a vessel. That's laughable. Females want their genetics to succeed just as much as males. They just dont have to fight as much because they have the limited gamete, its not a competition to be chosen when the other sex is unlimited. And the way we talk about paternal vs maternal. Paternal animals are all about "self preservation" but maternal animals are robots to their love. Dont get me started on how people act when I tell them my betta males do the incubating. We like to see it as a male competing to spread his genes and not a female choosing to complete her genes with the perfect individual. Every time someone tries to symbolize sex this shit comes into play. Male is the default that uses female as his tool. Be it describing it as penetration, fertilization, and much more. On the topic of "fertilization" did you know that the egg chooses the sperm? Did you know eggs are more complex than sperm? Did you know that eggs are not infertile without a sperm they just arent a embryo? We see female as defined by male, made valueable by male. A vessel filled by male. I think it's time for females to realize that nature is actually quite female centered. Hopefully as we get more women in this field, that will change. Because right now I'm starting to learn that a lot of science is worded in a way so males can cope with actually being quite lesser than females and at our disposal.

Edit: thanks for all the attention everyone! I've always wanted a space I could talk about this sort of thing. Glad to know I'm not alone on this. Trying to be in this field as a feminist can be insufferable

[ddarker-dreams]

yan anaxa, mydei & phainon — handling jealousy.

It doesn’t take much to rouse Anaxa’s possessiveness. 

As a rational man, you’d expect him to operate on cold logic, but he’s prone to bouts of passion. Bizarrely, a person flirting with you is a pardonable transgression. He can’t fault people for succumbing to biological urges. What he can (and does) find fault with, however, is when others monopolize your time. He’s devised a simple system for issuing judgment. By his estimate, no one aside from him should take more than five minutes of your time. Anything beyond that is excessive. After all, he fulfills every role. Colleague, teacher, lover; he’s the complete package! So why would you need anyone else? 

Anaxa considers it a personal insult if you indulge others past their allotted time. This is made worse if you’re enjoying yourself. Why not tell him to leap into the black tide if you think so little of him? Despite the creative ideas swirling in his head, he won’t enact revenge on the guilty party. Instead, he hunts you down afterward. You’re then lectured on your ‘unbecoming conduct.’ He acts like people who seek your company are contagions you must avoid, lest you catch their stupidity. It’s best to let him finish his diatribe. Interrupting him will not go over well for you. 

Comparatively, Mydei is the most forgiving. 

People know to leave you alone. They assume their life would be forfeit if they so much as glance at you the wrong way. Mydei might not be the monster others assume him to be, but that doesn’t stop him from utilizing this misconception. Contrary to public perception, he won’t extinguish bloodlines over some youth trying to win your favor. No, stuff like that doesn’t get under his skin. It’s your former attachments he struggles with. The fact others hold a special space in your heart that’s permanently closed to him hurts more than a knife through the chest. 

He can protect you physically from threats, but he lacks what it takes to truly put you at ease. Try as he might to make himself less intimidating, you’ll always fear him. While this has its merits — such as discouraging subterfuge — he dislikes the terror in your eyes. In an ideal world, he’d prefer to see you smile or hear your laughter. Whoever brought you joy before earns his silent loathing. Mentioning them in passing guarantees putting him in a pensive mood. Mydei’s difficult to read, but with enough observation, you’ll come to recognize the correlation. 

If Phainon could, he’d handcuff your wrists together so you’d never be apart. 

Fortunately for you, the tricky logistics have dissuaded him from this plan. Your luck ends there. He always finds ways to hover around you, absorbing your attention like a sponge. Phainon’s reputation precedes him — in public, others are remiss to interrupt your outings when you’re together. They’d feel bad intruding on what little free time the Deliverer has. You’ll feel alone while surrounded by swaths of people who think they’re doing you a favor. Owing to this, there are rarely situations that could lead to him experiencing jealousy. 

The same can’t be said for inanimate objects. He’s gifted you an assortment of items in line with your interests, so that when he’s away, you can entertain yourself. When he returns and you don’t put them down, he can get a bit prickly. He’s been counting the days until he can see you again, only to lose to a book. Why read epics, when he can regale you with his equally thrilling adventures? It’d be obvious and reflect poorly on him as a man if he tossed out these belongings. This leaves him to compete with your hobbies for your attention, to varying success. 

[desigal-26]

Because I believe that no one acknowledges the fact that Oscar has won such beautiful trophies

Pretty Trophies

Oscar Piastri x Female!Reader

He had pretty trophies, but none compares to her

‘“You’re the best prize I’ve ever gotten,” he whispered, like it was a secret just for her. “For all the years I’ve struggled. For the pressure, the sacrifices, the doubt. For the late nights, the empty airports, the near-misses. You are the thing I never saw coming. And nothing I’ll ever win on track will feel as important as winning you.”’

Warnings: Reader gets a bit insecure—but no worries, our Osc is there to handle everything. Just Fluff.

Word Count: 1.2K (I know, it’s short)

Oscar sighed contentedly, pressing his back against the hotel room door as it clicked shut behind him. For a moment, he let his eyes fall closed, allowing the events of the past few hours to settle around him like soft, triumphant waves.

He was leading the World Driver’s Championship.

The first Australian to do so since his own mentor — and now manager — Mark Webber.

Five wins in eight races had earned him 186 points and a ten-point lead over his teammate. The numbers were surreal. Clean. Ruthless. Beautiful.

But for tonight, Oscar didn’t care about standings, margins, or strategy. Not now. Not after a day like this — a day that had meant more than just a P1.

This win had been personal.

His young sister, Eddie, had flown in for the race, her bright grin beaming down from the garage. And sitting in the paddock, heart in her hands and eyes full of pride, was the woman he loved — attending her first race of the season.

He had made sure to sign the champagne bottle in both of their names, a quiet little gesture captured on camera — though it took fans a while to decipher what it meant. And by the time they had… it was already making the rounds on Twitter, Instagram, and F1 Tumblr edits with captions like “soft launch of the century.”

But none of that mattered as much as the woman sitting on the bed in front of him now.

He opened his eyes, and the moment he did, the tired, composed exterior of a race-winning driver melted into something far more vulnerable. Something real.

There she was — his girl — perched cross-legged in one of his shirts, her gaze soft as she studied the newly acquired trophy resting in her lap. Her fingers traced the sharp, intricate lines of the Circuit de Barcelona-Catalunya like it was something sacred.

Oscar’s breath caught a little. Not because of the win. But because of the look on her face.

That reverent little smile.

The shine in her eyes.

The faint pink in her cheeks from when Lando had teased her about being “Oscar’s Lady Luck” in the media pen.

She was his calm in a storm, the quiet balance in his fast-paced world. Before her, he didn’t believe in luck — only in precision, data, and consistency. But then she arrived like a quiet miracle — a soft summer breeze across his sunburnt skin, a snowfall that whispered instead of screamed. Something divine choosing to belong in his world of rubber and fire.

The bed dipped slightly as he settled beside her. He didn’t speak — he just watched. Not the trophy. But her.

“You’re staring,” she murmured, eyes still fixed on the curves of the trophy.

“You’re staring too,” he countered, voice low.

“At an inanimate object,” she said with a shrug, finally glancing up — her lips curved in a smile that made his chest ache in the best way.

With a sigh, she gently placed the trophy on the bedside table, her eyes flicking back to his. “I’ve got what I really came for anyway,” she whispered, voice playful, and edged closer to him with a mischievous twinkle in her gaze.

“You’re thinking something,” Oscar observed, eyebrow raised.

“Am I?” she whispered back, nose brushing his as she pressed a featherlight kiss against its tip.

He immediately scrunched his face, caught off guard, which made her burst into a giggle — full, warm, and alive.

“You love doing that,” he groaned, though the corners of his mouth curled helplessly into a smile.

“I just love your nose scrunches,” she said matter-of-factly, her voice all sweetness and mischief. “They make you look like a golden retriever.”

He rolled his eyes, but his hands had already moved — one sliding around her waist to pull her against him. She yelped in surprise, half-laughing, half-gasping as she landed in his lap, hands pressed to his chest.

“Careful,” she warned, voice breathless. “You’re still a national treasure right now. Must protect the asset.”

“I’ll risk it,” Oscar murmured, brushing her hair gently off her face. “Besides… pretty sure you’re the one who brought me luck today.”

She tilted her head, smiling softly, eyes locked on his. “Then I guess you’ll have to keep me around till Abu Dhabi, huh?”

He didn’t even blink.

“Long after that,” he promised.

She giggled softly, still caught in his embrace, before her eyes flickered toward the gleaming silver resting on the bedside table.

Then, in a voice barely above a whisper, she said, “You love collecting pretty trophies, don’t you?”

The question caught him mid-movement. His fingers paused where they’d been brushing the curve of her back, his brows knitting in faint confusion. He tilted his head to the side, an amused quirk in his lips.

“What?” he asked, genuinely puzzled.

She grinned and gestured lazily toward the Spanish Grand Prix trophy. “I mean, just look at that. And the rest of them. Last year’s Hungarian GP, this year’s Chinese, Saudi Arabia…” She wrinkled her nose in mock frustration. “And I know I’m forgetting a few. Maybe Bahrain?”

Oscar chuckled under his breath. “You’re not wrong,” he murmured, his eyes warm as they studied her.

She shifted just enough to rest her chin against his chest, her voice still playful but quieter now — edged with something she didn’t name.

“You like collecting beautiful things. Earning them.”

Oscar didn’t speak at first. He just looked at her, really looked — the way her lashes fluttered, the way her mouth tilted into a half-smile even as her eyes held something a little more fragile. A little unsure.

And then he gently tilted her chin up so her gaze met his completely.

“I do like collecting beautiful things,” he said softly, voice slow and certain. “But those trophies? They’re just metal. Stats. Symbols.”

His thumb brushed against her cheek, the gesture unbearably tender.

“You’re the best prize I’ve ever gotten,” he whispered, like it was a secret just for her. “For all the years I’ve struggled. For the pressure, the sacrifices, the doubt. For the late nights, the empty airports, the near-misses. You are the thing I never saw coming. And nothing I’ll ever win on track will feel as important as winning you.”

Her eyes widened slightly, the air catching in her throat.

Oscar smiled gently, forehead brushing against hers.

“I’d give up every podium for you. No hesitation.”

The silence that followed wasn’t empty — it was full. Of meaning. Of weight. Of promises unsaid but deeply understood.

She opened her mouth to say something, but emotion clogged her voice, and instead, she leaned in — pressing her lips softly to his. It wasn’t rushed or fiery, but reverent, like she was answering with everything she couldn’t put into words.

When they pulled apart, she whispered against his mouth, “You make it very hard to stay composed, Piastri.”

He smirked. “Good. Because I’ve been completely ruined for composure since the moment I saw you in that bloody paddock sundress.”

She laughed, her face buried in the crook of his neck now, and he held her tighter, as if the world could melt around them and he’d still be exactly where he wanted to be.

With her.

His real victory.

[writeriguess]

Can you please write Bakugo x Short Reader, who always has trouble reaching tall shelves and stuff like that, he always finds it very cute and has to make himself not to show a smile when she requires his help. Maybe sometimes he just picks her up to help her reach stuff and always teases her about it. Thank you!

Just Ask, Shorty

It happened again.

You stood in front of the kitchen cabinet, glaring at the top shelf like it had personally offended you. Your fingers stretched as far as they could, the tips just barely grazing the edge of the cereal box you wanted. You refused to get the stool. That thing only reminded you of your constant struggle against gravity, and you weren’t about to let an inanimate object win today.

With a deep breath, you prepared to jump—only to freeze when a familiar voice rumbled behind you.

“You look like a damn idiot.”

Your shoulders stiffened, and you turned your head just enough to see Bakugo leaning against the doorway, arms crossed over his chest, definitely trying not to smirk.

“Shut up, Katsuki,” you huffed, returning your focus to the shelf. “I got this.”

Bakugo made a low sound in his throat—something between an amused scoff and a chuckle. He knew damn well you didn’t ‘got this.’ And, honestly, he found it absolutely adorable watching you struggle, even if he’d rather die than admit it out loud.

“Yeah, sure,” he muttered, pushing off the wall. “Move.”

You didn’t move. Instead, you stubbornly hopped, fingertips brushing the box just enough to nudge it further away.

“…You’re doin’ this on purpose, aren’t ya?”

“No!”

He rolled his eyes before stepping up behind you. Before you could protest, his hands gripped your waist, and in one smooth motion, he lifted you up like you weighed nothing.

“K-Katsuki!” you squeaked, flailing slightly as he held you effortlessly.

“What?” he snorted. “You wanted the damn cereal, didn’t ya? Hurry up before I drop your ass.”

You grumbled under your breath but grabbed the box, feeling your face heat up. The worst part? This wasn’t the first time he’d done this. If anything, it was becoming a regular occurrence. And he always took the opportunity to tease you about it.

Once he set you down, you spun to face him with a glare, only to find his usual scowl in place—but his eyes held something softer, something amused. You knew he was holding back a smirk.

“I hate you,” you muttered.

“Pfft, yeah right,” he scoffed, ruffling your hair before walking off. “Just admit you like bein’ picked up, short stack.”

You grabbed a kitchen towel and threw it at him. He dodged without even looking back, laughing as he disappeared into the living room.

…Yeah. You were never going to win against him.

[tacticalprincess]

Pet desk gf with Konig pretty pleasee!

this with gamer!könig! he’s already suffocatingly clingy and obsessive over you as it is, so the fact that you willingly sit with him for hours while he games is everything he could’ve asked for. he can get fully submersed into whatever violent shooting game he’s into that month without worrying about your whereabouts or wellbeing, knowing you’re in the safest place you can be; right where he can see you. and plus, you make much better use than any of the other inanimate objects you gifted him to decorate his gaming setup, sitting pretty on his strong, broad lap while you sporadically feed him snacks you put together, rubbing his back and clinging to his burly arms.

he can tell when you get horny and achey from watching the way his jaw clenches in concentration, the way his fingers and biceps flex as he plays, from the way you start to huff and squirm for his attention. depending on how generous he’s feeling that day, he’ll either shut you up by bouncing his knee, letting you rub your swollen clit red and raw on his thigh, or with a few thick fingers stuffed inside your greedy, slick pussy, all without looking away from his screen. if you need something in your mouth, you’re always welcome to crawl under the desk and help yourself, so long as you’re not interrupting his gameplay.

cockwarming him is a special occasion — and one that almost always ends in your sore, stretched out pussy being pounded mercilessly after he turns off his computer. whether that be happy and victorious after a win, or aggressive and brutal after a rage quit. he’s broken countless keyboards and monitors by fucking you harshly into them, or throwing them off the desk in the heat of the moment, too eager to release all his pent up frustration inside your warm, welcoming cunt. and you lay back and take it like the good little toy you are, the best stress reliever he could ask for <3

[lee-laurent]

Juno - Nico Hischier

Summary: nico and aj hughes have a little bump in the road

content: pregnancy, angst, a tiny bit of fluffy

wc: 5.1k

notes: wellllll, first fic back! i don't think it's my best work, and i apologize for that, but i have to ease myself back in somehow. missed this... hope you guys like it :)

Was it possible for an inanimate object to mock you? Because that stupid, white stick definitely felt like it was mocking her.

AJ didn't move. She sat on the closed toilet lid, hoodie sleeves tugged over her hands, foot bouncing like it might help tap the panic out of her bloodstream. Her stomach had been unsettled for days--she'd chalked it up to stress, bad takeout, the air of New Jersey finally hitting her Michigan immune system.

But somewhere deep down, she'd known.

She'd known the second she stood in the drugstore, hand shaking as she reached for the most reliable looking test. The second the little screen blinked to life, then filled in the lines with cruel clarity.

Two months.

She did the math without meaning to. That first night at Nico's after the Devils' win. White wine, soft kisses, and the sound of his laugh in the quiet of her apartment. She'd thought she'd taken the pill that day. She always did--or, usually. But "usually" wasn't enough, apparently.

She pulled out her phone and stared at it. Her thumb hovered over his name in her messages for a few seconds before she actually typed anything.

AJ: can you come over? Nico: be there in 10

She blinked fast, trying to fight back the tears. It wasn't that she regretted it--not Nico. Not this. Not entirely.

But her life had just split into two timelines. Before. And now.

The knock at the door came much faster than she had expected. AJ opened it, and there he was--messy hair, hoodie pulled over his head, expression shifting to worry the second he saw her face.

He stepped in, closing the door behind him. "Hey, what's wrong?"

She didn't say anything. Just turned and walked to the bathrom, grabbed the test off the counter, walked back, and held it out like she was handing over something radioactive.

Nico took it without a word. Looked down. Looked up.

"You're--" he started, then stopped. "You're pregnant?"

She nodded once. Her throat felt too tight to speak.

He set the test down slowly, gently, like it could shatter into a million pieces. The he crossed the space between them and wrapped his arms around her, pulling her into his chest like it was the only thing that mattered.

AJ let herself sink into him. Her hands twisted in the fabric of his hoodie. Her face pressed against his shoulder.

"I don't know what I'm doing," she said into the silence. "I'm twenty-one, I just got here, I feel like I've barely figured out how to be an adult, and now--"

"You're not doing this alone," he said, quiet but firm. "You hear me? Whatever you want--whatever you need-- I'm here."

His hand slid up her back and into her hair, grounding her.

She swallowed hard. "I haven't told anyone. You're the first."

He pulled back just enough to look at her. "I'm glad you told me. I mean it."

AJ searched his face. "You're not... mad?"

Nico's expression softened--that Nico kind of soft, the rare kind, the one she only ever saw when they were alone. "No, AJ. I'm not mad. Scared, maybe. But not mad. I love you. That's not changing."

It hit her again--just how deeply she felt for him. And how complicated that love had become.

She gave a short laugh, a little watery. "Guess this means we have to tell people."

Nico raised an eyebrow. "You mean tell your brothers that I've been sneaking around with their sister and now she's pregnant with my baby?"

She smacked his chest lightly. "Don't say it like that."

"I'm just saying, might wanna let me wear my helmet for that conversation."

AJ rolled her eyes, but the tension in her chest eased a little. It always did around him. That's what scared her most, maybe--how quickly she'd fallen, how easily he made the rest of the world feel quiet.

She pulled herself closer again and closed her eyes.

"We'll figure it out," Nico said, his lips brushing her hairline.

"I know," she whispered. "I just... I didn't expect my life to look like this."

"Neither did I," he said. "But if it's with you, I'm good."

~~

AJ was once again staring at the contacts on her phone.

She'd already texted her mom. That had gone okay--better than she expected, actually. Ellen had taken a pause, sent back "we'll figure it out" in a way that AJ knew was in that steady, calm mom-tone that she didn't appreciate nearly enough growing up. They called for almost an hour after. AJ cried. Her mom didn't.

But this... this was different.

Telling Quinn meant telling a brother. And while he wasn't in the same post code as Jack and Luke, he was still protective. Still a Hughes boy. Still going to have feelings.

She hit the FaceTime button before she could talk herself out of it.

It rang twice.

"Hey," Quinn said, propped up against a headboard in a hotel room. His curls were messy, and he looked like he'd just gotten back from a morning skate. "What's up? You good?"

"Yeah," AJ said automatically, which was a lie. She tucked her legs underneath her on the sofa. "Kinda. Sorta. No."

Quinn sat up straighter. "What happened? Did something happen?"

She took a breath. "I need to tell you something, and you have to promise not to freak out."

"You know saying that just makes me want to freak out harder, right?"

"Quinn."

"Okay, okay." He held up his hands. "I'm chill... I'm chill."

AJ exhaled and rubbed her fingers along the seam of her hoodie sleeve.

"I'm pregnant."

Silence.

Quinn blinked. "Like... you're pregnant."

"No, Quinn, my imaginary friend is. Yes. Me."

He leaned back against the headboard, eyes wide, running a hand down his face. "Holy shit."

"I know."

"I mean--like, wow." He wasn't yelling. He wasn't even mad. Just surprised. "You're sure?"

"Two tests. Same answer."

"Okay," he said, nodding slowly, like he was still catching up. "Okay."

"I didn't mean for this to happen."

"Obviously."

"I'm not... I'm not freaking out exactly, but it's a lot. I didn't know who to tell after Mom, and you felt like the least terrifying option."

"I'm honoured," Quinn deadpanned, then softened. "No, seriously. Thanks for telling me."

She looked down at her lap. "I'm keeping it."

"Alright."

"That's all you're gonna say?"

He tilted his head at her. "Do you want me to scream or something?"

"I don't know. Maybe?"

He gave her a small smile. "AJ, if you want to do this, I've got your back. Full stop."

The tightness in her chest eased.

"But I gotta ask," Quinn continued. "Does the guy know?"

She nodded. "Yeah. I told him right away. He's... he's in it. He wants to be there."

"Good." A beat. "Are you gonna tell me who it is?"

AJ hesitated. The silence dragged.

"Oh my god, is it someone I know?"

Her face gave her away before she could even lie.

"Wait. Is it someone Jack and Luke know?"

Her silence deepened.

Quinn's eyes narrowed. "Jesus Christ. It is, isn't it?"

She tugged the sleeve over her hand again. "Don't say anything. Please. Not yet."

Quinn groaned and threw his head back. "AJ."

"I'm serious. I need a minute before the chaos starts. I'm barely holding it together as it is."

He looked back at the screen, more serious now. "Fine. I won't say anything."

"Thank you."

"But you have to tell them eventually. Jack's gonna lose his shit."

"I know."

"And Luke..." He trailed off.

"I know," she repeated, quieter this time. "It's gonna hurt him."

"You're like his other half," Quinn said simply. "He's gonna feel it."

AJ nodded. Her eyes stung a little, but she blinked it back.

"I didn't mean to keep this from them," she said. "It just... happened fast. And then I was in it. With him. And it felt too good to wreck by dragging my brothers into it."

"Yeah, well," Quinn sighed, "you kind of wrecked it anyway."

She smiled despite herself. "Thanks for the pep talk."

"Anytime."

~~

The first time she saw Nico Hischier in person outside of hockey, AJ was standing outside her new apartment holding a box of wine glasses and pretending she didn't want to throw up from nerves.

Not because of him--not just because of him--but because this was it. New city. New life. No roommates. No college safety net. Just her, a freshly printed finance degree, and six-month internship at a firm in downtown Newark.

"You're sure you don't want help unpacking?" Jack had asked when he dropped her off, eyes darting toward the building like he didn't trust it. "I could come up for a bit."

She'd rolled her eyes. "I'm not twelve, Jack."

"Okay, but if your place sucks ass, you can come crash with me and Moose."

"Appreciate the vote of confidence."

He'd ruffled her hair and left after swearing he and Luke would drag her to dinner sometime soon.

That was two hours ago. She'd only gotten one box up the stairs before someone knocked.

She opened the door expecting a neighbour or maybe a building manager.

Instead: Nico.

AJ blinked. "Oh."

He smiled, easy and lopsided. "Hey."

Her stomach did that fluttery thing it always does in those kind of situations.

"Jack said you were moving in today. Figured I'd say hi. Offer some help."

"Oh, so you're the welcoming committee?" she teased, stepping aside to let him in.

"I take my job as captain very seriously."

He walked in like he'd been there before--which made sense, she guessed, since the team had a couple players in the complex. Still, something about Nico made the space feel smaller. Or warmer. Or both.

AJ wasn't sure what she'd expected from him in person after weeks of casual DMs--little things like "you'll love this coffee place" or "this street sucks at 5pm"-- but the real thing was... different.

He was taller than she remembered. And quieter. And still standing there.

They unpacked a few boxes together. He found her coffee mugs and made a whole show of inspecting them like they were the most important part of the kitchen.

"You drink too much caffeine," he said with mock judgment.

"You sound like Luke."

"Well, maybe he's right for once."

That made her laugh--a real one. And he looked a little too pleased about it.

At one point, they reached for the same picture frame and their fingers touched.

Just for a second.

But the air shifted.

It felt like some sort of shitty rom-com moment.

AJ looked up at him. Nico looked at her. Neither moved.

She cleared her throat first. "So... I guess I owe you a coffee now?"

He smiled again, slower this time. "Guess so."

~~

They tried, for maybe two weeks, to keep it casual. Friendly.

They got coffee. They "ran into" each other more often than made sense. He helped her build a desk. She brough him cookies from a bakery she found. One night she came over to watch a movie and ended up asleep on his couch-- when she woke up, he'd covered her with a blanket and left a glass of water next to her.

By the time he kissed her--a soft, stupidly gentle kiss outside her building after walking her home--neither of them pretended it was still casual.

They didn't label it right away.

But AJ knew what it was. What it felt like.

Warm. Solid. A little terrifying.

She hadn't told anyone. Not because she was ashamed--but because it felt like the one thing in her life that was completely hers. No brothers. No media. No pressure.

Just her. And Nico.

And for a while, that was enough.

Until it wasn't.

~~

Jack had Quinn on speaker while making eggs--half-listening, half-focused on not burning his food.

"Tell me again why you voluntarily live in Canada in the dead of winter," Jack said, flipping on of the eggs with a little too much force. "It's like Antarctica."

"It builds character," Quinn replied dryly.

Jack snorted. "You need less character."

"Oh, I'll remember that next time you call crying about your power play minutes."

"Shut up," Jack grinned. "Anyway, how's the team?"

They talked hockey for a few minutes. Coaches, line changes, whatever. Just brothers being brothers. Jack tossed some toast in the toaster and leaned against the counter, phone still propped beside the stove.

Then Quinn said it. Casually. Mid-sentence. Like it wasn't a bomb.

"...and last time I talked to AJ she seemed good. She said the morning sickness was starting to ease up, so that's a win, I think."

Jack froze. "Wait. What?"

Quinn didn't even pause. "What?"

"What did you just say?"

There was a silence. Then a quiet, cautious: "... nothing?"

"Quinn."

"Shit."

Jack straightened up, heartbeat in his ears now. "Morning sickness? Are you kidding?"

Quinn swore under his breath. "Dude. I thought--"

"You thought what?"

"I thought you knew!"

Jack's hands clenched around the edge of the counter. "Knew what, Quinn?!"

There was a beat. Quinn's voice was lower now. "She's pregnant, Jack."

Jack stared at the stove like it had betrayed him. "She's what?"

"I thought she told you--"

"Well, she didn't!" Jack snapped, the volume of his voice bouncing off the walls of the kitchen. "Jesus Christ."

"Jack--"

"Who is it?" Jack's voice dropped to a growl. "Who got her pregnant?"

"I don't know if that's--"

"Quinn."

Another pause. Then Quinn said, carefully, "That's her story to tell. Not mine."

Jack's jaw tightened. "Unbelievable."

"Just take a second before you--"

"I've gotta go," he muttered, and hung up without waiting for Quinn to stop him.

~~

Jack slammed his bedroom door harder than necessary.

Luke looked up from the couch, startled, a protein bar half-open in his hand. "You good?"

Jack didn't answer, just pacing the room.

"Jack?"

"She's pregnant," he snapped.

Luke blinked. "Who is?"

Jack stopped. Turned. "AJ."

Luke's face went blank. "What?"

"She's pregnant, Luke."

Luke just stared at him, like the words hadn't landed yet.

Jack kept going, too fired up to stop now. "Quinn let it slip on the phone before you got home. Just-- casually. Like we were all in on it. Like we all knew."

Luke stood slowly. "Wait. She told Quinn?"

Jack's hands went to his head, gripping his hair like it might help him think. "Quinn. And probably Mom. And who the hell knows who else."

Luke's voice was quieter. "But not us."

Jack looked at him. "Not us."

A long beat passed between them. Jack's anger was hot, restless. Luke's was colder--the kind that sits heavy in your chest.

"She's my twin," Luke said, barely above a whisper. "She's supposed to tell me everything."

"I know."

"No, like-- everything. We've never not told each other something. Not like this."

Jack didn't say anything. There was nothing to say.

Luke sat down, slowly, like the news physically drained him. "She couldn't even text? Call?"

Jack leaned against the wall, breathing hard. "I'm going over there."

Luke looked up, surprised. "Now?"

"I need to know who the hell got her pregnant."

Luke didn't stop him. He just nodded, quiet and distant, eyes fixed on some invisible point on the floor.

"Let me know how it goes," he said, and unwrapped the rest of the protein bar with a kind of numbness that hurt more than any yelling ever could.

~~

Jack didn't knock.

He didn't even hesitate. Just buzzed into AJ's building, took the stairs two at a time, and slammed his fist against her apartment door like it had done something to someone he loved.

It wasn't AJ who opened it.

It was Nico.

Standing there barefoot, in a t-shirt and joggers, hair still damp from a shower.

Jack froze for maybe half a second.

Nico's eyes widened--just slightly--and then he stepped back like he knew exactly why Jack was there.

"Jack--"

"How long."

Nico sighed. "Come inside."

"No. How long."

Nico looked him in the eye. Calm. Controlled. Not trying to fight--but not backing down either.

"Three and a half months."

Jack let out a laugh that had no humour in it. "Are you serious?"

"I didn't plan for this to happen."

"Oh, that makes it fine then."

"Jack--"

"You got my sister pregnant."

AJ's voice came from the hallway before Nico could answer. "Jack--stop."

She was in an oversized Devils hoodie, eyes wide.

"You're dating him?" Jack pointed like he couldn't believe what he was seeing. "You didn't think to mention that before this happened?"

"It wasn't just some hookup," she snapped, stepping between them. "You think I'd do that?"

"I don't know what to think, AJ," Jack fired back. "You're my little sister--"

"I'm twenty-one, not sixteen."

"Yeah? Still feels like you went behind my back."

"I did," she said without so much as flinching. "We both did. Because we knew you'd react like this."

Jack turned to Nico, furious now, there was practically steam coming out of his ears. "You're the captain. You couldn't have come to me? Said something?"

"And say what?" Nico said, his voice tight. "Hey, Jack, I'm in love with your sister, don't punch me? Come on."

Jack's breath caught. "Youre what?"

AJ went still.

Nico looked at her, then back at Jack. "Yeah. I'm in love with her. I didn't mean for it to happen, but I'm also not gonna apologize for it."

Jack didn't say anything. His jaw was tight, his fists tighter.

AJ stepped forward. "I get that you're mad. I do. But this isn't about you, Jack. This is my life."

"You lied."

"I protected something that mattered to me. Something I wanted to figure out on my own before the three of you tried to take it apart."

For a moment, nobody moved.

Then Jack shook his head, slow and hard. "You should've told me."

"I know," she said quietly.

Jack glanced at Nico one last time--something unreadable in his eyes--then turned and left without another word.

~~

AJ stared at the ceiling from her spot on the couch, curled under a blanket she wasn't really using. The apartment was dark except for the kitchen light. Nico had left to give her space--not because she asked him to, but because he knew she needed it.

She'd said she was fine. Lied straight to his face with a soft smile and a kiss on the cheek.

She wasn't fine.

Jack had barely been gone two hours, but it felt like her whole world had tilted sideways. The yelling still echoed in her ears. The hurt in his voice. The look on Nico's face when he told her brother he was in love with her.

She hadn't heard from Luke.

That was what ate at her most.

He always texted her. Always checked in. Even if they were under the same roof growing up, even if it was dumb meme or an "omg look what I saw". And now? Radio silence.

When she finally worked up the nerve to call him, it rang.

And rang.

She was just about to hang up when it clicked.

"Hey."

His voice was weird. Not cold. Just... tired.

AJ closed her eyes. "Hey."

A pause.

"Jack came home quiet," Luke said after a moment. "Didn't say anything at first. Then he sat down and told me everything."

AJ swallowed. "Yeah."

Another pause. Longer this time.

"You told everyone but me."

It wasn't accusatory. Just honest. And it cracked something in her chest.

"I didn't mean to," she said quietly. "I just... I didn't know how to tell you."

"I'm your twin."

"I know."

"You've never not told me something before."

"I know, Luke."

Her voice caught. She hated how small it sounded. "I wasn't trying to shut you out. I'm scared. And everything is happening so fast, and it felt like if I said it out loud to you, it'd make it feel more... real."

"It is real," he said. "You're pregnant, AJ."

"Yeah, I know that."

Luke was quiet again. She could picture him--sitting on his bed, phone pressed to his ear, hair messy, that look on his face like he was trying to solve a puzzle with pieces missing.

"I'm not mad," he finally said. "As stupidly cliché as it sounds, I'm... disappointed."

That word hit harder than all of Jack's yelling.

"I'm sorry," she whispered. "I didn't want to hurt you."

"I know."

"I should've told you."

"You should've."

Silence again. But not as tense this time. Just heavy.

Then Luke said, "Is he good to you?"

"Yeah... he really is."

"Then okay," Luke said. "That's all I need."

Tears slipped down her cheeks before she could stop them.

"I love you, you know," she sighed.

"I know," he said, voice a little thicker now. "I love you too, A."

~~

Practice was brutal.

Not because the drils were any harder than usual, or because they'd run extra conditioning, but because the tension on the ice was thick enough to skate through.

Passes from Jack came half a second too late. Luke missed a read he never missed. Nico's jaw was locked the entire time.

They weren't talking. Not really.

Not unless they had to.

Coaches noticed. A couple of teammates noticed. But no one said anything out loud.

Until the end.

Everyone was stretching, cooling down. Nico stood near the centre ice, stick resting against his shoulder, eyes locked on the Hughes brothers like he was deciding how far he could push before snapping.

Jack skated by, muttering something under his breath--something sharp, just loud enough for Nico to catch.

That was it.

Nico dropped his stick to the ice with a clean clack and turned.

"Enough."

Everyone froze. A few heads turned. But Nico didn't care.

He skated over to Jack, calm but ice-cold.

"I don't care what's going on between us off the ice. But here? This is my team. And if you've got a problem with me, you deal with it when we're not wearing the same logo.

Jack's jaw clenched, but he didn't answer.

Nico didn't let it go. He looked at Luke, too. "Same goes for you."

Luke met his eyes, didn't say anything--just gave a single nod.

Nico's voice dropped lower. "You think I don't get it? I do. But we've got a job to do. And I won't let this mess fuck it up for the rest of the guys in this room."

Jack finally spoke. "Hard to play with someone you don't trust."

"Then get over it," Nico said, deadly calm. "Because I'm not going anywhere. And neither is she."

Silence.

Then Nico turned and skated off the ice like the conversation was over.

Because it was.

~~

Nico knew it was coming.

The second he saw the text from Jack--"you home?"--he knew this wasn't going to be about hockey. Or anything that could pass as casual.

Still, he said yes.

So now he stood in his apartment, arms crossed, watching Jack and Luke walk in like they were there on official business. Not as teammates. Not even as friends.

Luke looked tense. Jack looked like he hadn't slept.

"Water? Coffee?" Nico offered out of habit.

Jack ignored it. Luke shook his head.

Cool.

Nico leaned back against the kitchen counter. "So... what do you want to say?"

Jack didn't waste time. "We want to know what your endgame is."

"My what?"

Luke shot Jack a look. "Dude."

"No," Jack said, eyes still locked on Nico. "Seriously. What is this, Nico? You're the captain. She's my sister. His twin. You really think this wasn't gonna blow up?"

"It wasn't about what I thought would happen. It was about how I felt about her."

Jack scoffed. "So what? You fall for her in secret and decide to roll with it?"

"She's not just your sister, Jack," Nico said evenly. "She's her own person. And she's not some mistake I made on a Friday night. I love her."

Luke flinched a little at the word. Nico noticed.

"Sure I didn't plan it, but I'm not walking away from it."

Jack shook his head. "You should've come to us."

"And said what?" Nico asked.

"You lied to us."

"No. I kept it private. There's a difference."

"Feels the same."

Luke finally spoke up, voice low. "You knew how close we are. You knew what she means to us. You could've told us. Trusted us."

Nico looked at him. "She asked me not to."

That landed.

Luke leaned back against the arm of the couch, expression unreadable now. "That sounds like her."

Jack didn't look as forgiving. "You don't get to stand there and pretend like this didn't break something."

Nico didn't flinch. "I'm not pretending anything. I know what this did. I know how it looks. And I still chose it. I chose her."

None of them moved.

Then Jack mumbled, "This doesn't change anything for me."

"I figured," Nico shrugged. "But it will eventually."

Luke stood up. Jack didn't.

"We're going to dinner with our parents this weekend," Luke said flatly. "They want you there."

Nico blinked. "They know?"

Luke nodded. "Didn't AJ tell you? They know everything."

Jack grabbed his jacket, "Doesn't mean we're cool."

Nico didn't stop him. "I wouldn't expect you to be."

And just like that, they left.

No shouting. No fists. Just the sound of a door shutting a little too hard.

~~

The restaurant was nicer than AJ had expected. Low lighting, white tablecloths, the kind of place where the menu didn't list prices and the waiter knew everyone's wine preferences before they even ordered.

She'd picked a black sweater that was just loose enough to hide the ever so slight bump but still nice enough to pretend she wasn't spiraling internally.

Nico looked good. Clean, simple. Button-down shirt, nervous smile. He kept checking in with her with little glances and thigh-squeezes under the table. She squeezed back every time.

Jack hadn't looked at either of them once.

Luke had, but barely.

Ellen and Jim, on the other hand, were warm as ever--acting like this was just another family dinner. AJ didn't know if that made things better or worse.

"So," Ellen said, smiling as she set her napkin on her lap. "How are you feeling, AJ?"

"Good. Tired. Hungry, like, all the time."

"Growing a human'll do that," Jim added, reaching for his water.

"And your internship?" Ellen asked. "Still liking it?"

"I love it. They've been super understanding. Said I could move into a full-time position after the baby comes if I want to."

"That's incredible, sweetheart."

AJ smiled softly. Nico planted his hand gently on her thigh again under the table. It grounded her. Always did.

Then Jack spoke.

"Wild how everything's just working out, huh?"

AJ stiffened.

Ellen turned her head, calm. "What was that?"

"Nothing," Jack muttered, stabbing a piece of asparagus to get out his frustration.

Nico stayed quiet. But the shift in his posture was subtle. Straighter. Steadier.

"So, Nico," Jim said. "You excited to be dad?"

Luke's fork paused halfway to his mouth. Jack set his down completely.

Nico didn't flinch. "Yeah. I am. I never saw this coming, but... I am."

"You sure about that?" Jack asked, too casually.

"Jack," AJ warned.

"No, I'm serious," he continued. "Because being a dad isn't just about showing up to ultrasounds and holding her hand when she's scared. It's real. It's hard. And it's not going away."

"I know," Nico said calmly.

"You think you know."

"Jack," Ellen said sharply.

He didn't stop. "He kept it from us. They both did. And now we're supposed to be cool with it?"

"We're not asking you to be cool," AJ said quietly. "We're asking you not to treat us like we're something that you have to fix."

That shut him up for a second.

Then Ellen stepped in. "Jack. Luke. I understand this was a shock. I understand you're upset. But I also see how much Nico cares about your sister. I see how calm she is around him. How safe."

Jim added, "You don't have to approve. But you do have to support her."

"She's not a child anymore," Ellen said. "You don't get to decide who she loves. You get to show up for her. That's your job now."

The silence at the table was thick. But different this time.

Jack didn't say anything else.

Luke looked at AJ and gave her a small, apologetic smile.

And Nico--Nico finally exhaled. Just a little.

~~

The lights were off in the exam room, just the glow of the monitor and the hum of machines filled the space.

AJ lay back on the table, shirt bunched up around her ribs, fingers curled around Nico's hand. His thumb traced slow circles over hers.

"You ready to see your baby again?" the tech asked, cheerful in that calm, practiced way.

AJ nodded, still stunned that they were there again.

The image flickered to life.

There it was. A blurry, perfect mess of movement. Tiny limbs. A strong heartbeat pulsing in the room.

AJ didn't cry. She thought she might, but she didn't. She just stared, wide-eyed, overwhelmed in the best way.

Nico was the one who squeezed her hand tighter. "Hi, little one," he whispered, like it was just for them.

Outside in the waiting room, Luke sat hunched in a chair, scrolling aimlessly through his phone. Jack was next to him, arms crossed, eyes on the floor.

Neither of them spoke.

When the door opened, AJ stepped out first. Her cheeks were pink, and she looked lighter somehow. Not nervous. Not afraid.

Nico followed behind her, one hand on her back, the other holding a small printed photo--the ultrasound.

AJ held it up. "Wanna see?"

Luke stood up first. He crossed the room and took the photo carefully, like it might crumble if he breathed too hard.

He stared at it. Long enough that AJ started to wonder if she'd misread everything.

Then he smiled--just a little--and handed it back.

"They've got your nose," he said quietly.

AJ laughed, "Our nose."

Luke nodded, eyes flicking to Nico for a second. He didn't say anything. Didn't need to.

Jack stood slower.

He didn't ask to see the photo. Didn't speak right away either.

But before they left, he reached out and clapped a hand on Nico's shoulder--quick, a little stiff. But real.

"We good?" Nico asked softly.

Jack's jaw ticked.

Then he nodded. "We're getting there."

[weirdmarioenemies]

Name: Gummy Worm

Debut: Real Life

Usually, on a Friday, we would have a post about something not from Mario, but from a game nonetheless. But I've been thinking about gummy worms. And I want to talk about gummy worms. And I can do whatever I want!

Gummy worms are a wonderful, wonderful creature! A bit difficult to categorize, from a creature standpoint. They are inanimate objects, but based on creatures, giving them immediate creature character. They're not fictional creatures, since they're real! They exist in our realm alongside us. Quite a puzzle, isn't it? (it isn't)

Gummy worms are thought to have originated as Trolli's Squiggles, which still exist today! It's unclear WHEN exactly they were created, but they were brought over to the United States from Europe in 1981 (worms of all kinds love to be introduced to the United States from Europe), gaining notoriety after being featured in Ghostbusters. Americans only just found out about these things, and they were already charmed to the point of putting them in a feature film. That's how delightful these things are!

Of course, I have my own ideas. How strange that we don't exactly know when gummy worms were created. Almost as if they weren't created. Almost as if they slithered through a portal out of the Candy Dimension, where everything is made of candy, of course. There, gummy worms naturally burrow through soil made of crushed cookie bits. Yes, they poop out nutrient-rich cookie crumbs that help jelly beans and other candy plants to grow extra healthily. Of course they do. What do you take me for?

I think the most ICONIC gummy worms are easily the two-toned sour ones! There we have our three iconic characters: Blue/Pink, Yellow/Red, and Green/Orange. These seem to have originated as Trolli's Sour Brite Crawlers, and by now you may have noticed that Trolli doesn't tend to actually use the term "gummy worm" in their branding! Mercifully, the term "gummy worm" remains public domain, for us to frolic around with until the end of time!

One of my favorite things about Gummy Worm is that it's a celebration of the humble Worm. Isn't it so wonderful that there's an animal that is a near-featureless tube squirming in the soil beneath us? I'm sure you've wanted to eat one before. We all have. I love you, Worm, but you win the number one most slurpable animal award. We silly humans aren't supposed to eat raw worms, though, because of disease and parasites. Skill issue, I must say. Moles eat them with aplomb! When people do eat worms, it's after cooking them, but at that point they're not wiggly and slurpable anymore... there must be a better way (it's gummy worm!)

When doing research for this post I was kind of taken aback when learning worms were chosen for the candy's shape for the "gross" factor. I genuinely forgot anyone thinks that about worms! That's just a little thingy! Barely any features to be repulsed by!

Gummy Worm is basically the perfect Thing to me. It's worm, it's sweet treat, it's whimsical, it's everything! And we don't have to be limited to the kinds that are marketed to us, because you can make your own gummy worms if you want! You can make them realistic colors! Even realistic flavors, if you know what a worm tastes like... I don't, but if you are friends with a mole, you could ask.

There are big gummy worms, which is wonderful, but it's not enough. I think these should be available as pets. A three foot long gummy worm that is sentient, loves you, and never dies. Until that happens, I am happy to live in a world where gummy worms exist, and are beloved!

[radioactive-yuri]

one thing that never fails to get to me about alien stage is the differences in how the characters are treated by their respective alien guardians. something about it just feels so realistic.

mizi is treated like a beloved pet. they give her toys and love her and cry when she's sent away, and she cries too, because she's genuinely attached to them.

sua is treated like a part of a collection. made to fit her owner's aesthetic, a dozen young girls all dressed in white. as a child, she grows detached, almost like she believes herself to be an inanimate object too.

till is treated, unfortunately, the way a lot of misbehaving pets end up being treated. sold with a discount, physically abused, kept in restraints and a muzzle because of his rebellious behaviour.

ivan is spoiled but never really nourished, he's rewarded with special treatment because of his good behaviour and talents, but in the process is isolated from his peers.

luka is treated somewhat similar to sua, but taken to a new extreme. he's raised specifically for the purpose of winning alien stage, he's trained not to feel fear or empathy while on stage. his eating is controlled entirely by heperu, who gets to decide every other aspect of his life as well.

[xo-adeline]

Could I request Isagi, Chigiri, and Kaiser getting jealous of their s/o's plushie collection of them?

-> Definitely didn’t write this when I should have been doing my photography work ✋ but whatever I mean I was literally just sitting outside so decided to make the most of it

Isagi

-> Having a famous football player as a boyfriend was nothing to sneeze at, I mean the paparazzi and the fact that he was never really around, but the good thing was there was a lot of merch of him all over the internet, and one day when you were alone in your moods you decided that you were gonna get some of the merch you found and eventually you had a whole collection of stuff

-> It wasn’t until much later that Isagi finally got home from one of his games and came to visit you just to see his normal spot, cuddling with you was now filled by one of many plushie versions of himself

-> Merely chuckled and took a couple of pictures at first before trying to take it out of your arms but that’s when he realized that you were not letting it go, and that’s when he started to get a little jealous of Mini him

-> It wasn’t until the morning that you realized that he had gotten home and were super excited to see him only for him to be a wee bit upset and wouldn’t tell you why, but you figured out pretty fast when he kept side-eyeing the plush versions of him sitting on your bed and desk

-> That’s when you got to laugh and hug him while assuring him that they were not there to replace him, but just to keep you company when he wasn’t around.

-> But knowing him he just suggested that you should just call him wherever you were about to go to sleep so he could still be with you no matter the time difference.

Chigiri

-> MAN IS SIDE-EYE CENTRAL OVER HERE

-> Will REFUSE to tell you why he’s so upset even after coming home to you after winning a game

-> He will never admit to being jealous over an inanimate object, but he knows on the inside that he may or may not see it go flying out of the room later on

-> When he got home and saw you cuddling with a tiny version of him all while reading one of the many books from your bookshelves and surprisingly in where he would normally sit, he was a little pissed

-> It wasn’t until you decided to go to bed and through finding out by his side eyes that he, in fact, did not think plushie was a good replacement as you phrased it, you decided that instead of cuddling up to him like you normally would you instead cuddled with the plushie which only made him roll his eyes and end up throwing it somewhere else in the room, saying something along the lines of why would you need a stupid not real version of him when he was here right now

Kaiser

-> Definition of LE GASP

-> How could you cuddle with a mini him when perfectly good-sized him was right in front of your face?! Ness would never

-> Would throw it and cuddle into you the second he could get his hands on it, no matter what you were doing. Studying? Not more important the love of your life (as he likes to call himself)

-> Will steal all of them and hide them in places where it’s either out of reach from you or somewhere that you will never find no matter how hard you try (Petty Bitch)

-> Refuses to tell you where they are until you either reject giving him cuddles or kisses

-> Another one who will throw them if he finds you cuddling with them when you could totally be cuddling with him, a disgrace really

-> May or May not get a call from Ness later on shaming you for making Kaiser upset with a plush version of himself

[h8aaz]

𝐈𝐍𝐓𝐑𝐎𝐃𝐔𝐂𝐈𝐍𝐆 . . .

steel intelligence — ❝ HELMET .ᐟ READER ❞

★ meet star . . . she was originally the protector of soldier boy's very violent, very impulsive, very high brain—sitting over his head and shielding him from attacks upon his cranium. her name comes from the gold star that sat directly in the middle of her hunter green form, right above the eagle with open wings to view soldier boy's matching colored eyes.

shimmering n shining ! . . . star always makes it known that she's entered the room—unintentionally, of course. the miniscule gold flakes scattered across her skin catches the light in every direction, and if she turns too much, she could probably blind someone. doesn't help that she has one of the prettiest and brightest smiles possibly known to man.

brains of the operation ! . . . when she was transformed into a human by vought, she was given more knowledge than what she had gathered from soldier boy, seeing as he was borderline fried every second of the day. due to this hyper-intelligence, she's very calculated, contrasting to her gruff supe's impulsiveness. her planning and his disobedience causes too many arguments for the boys to handle—but she always wins at the end of the day.

dearest ben ! . . . she was the first part of his suit to be finished, meaning she's spent more time dealing with his brash nature than the rest of his vought-made suit. she knows how to deal with him more than anyone, knows more about him than anyone, more than he'd like to admit. despite her past memories as his helmet, and the major mistreatment that came with being an inanimate object owned by him, she loves him. she never stopped, even when she was told he was 'killed' by the russians (she never believed that for a second). but ben loves her back. and when he told her, she began to rant about how the beginning of their feelings came from some weird attachment issue from their past together, and that they should acknowledge that; but he got fed up so fast, saying she was spewing "made up shit" and excusing his behavior with "i'm not a fuckin' pussy, star. i don't get attached to shit, that's fucking stupid."

she's the woman ! . . . star is one of the few good things to come out of vought. she's a natural protector, indestructible because of her past form, insanely smart (not sister sage smart, but damn near close enough), and she's the perfect, most loving companion anyone could ever ask for. she's there when you need her, and even when you say you don't, she's still in your corner rooting for you. she's the opposite ben never openly wanted but constantly craved in secret, and now she's here, and she's real.

READ STAR'S NOTES !

coming soon . . .

GABS YAPS .ᐟ . . . okay this is my last !reader (for now??) bc i'm at SIX READERS LMFAOO like i need to be stopped someone shut off my brain PLEASE!!

once again, CREDS TO @daylighted FOR CREATING BABY!READER AND THE OBJECTS!READER UNIVERSE!! love u sm dahlia 🩷🩷

layout inspo from @titsout4jackles !!

special tags: @sunsbaby @starzify @soldiersgirl @bejeweledinterludes @littlesoulshine @deansbeer @titsout4jackles @daylighted @bluemerakis @j2archives @legalmente-loca @immodestly-marina

added tags: @lunaleah

dividers made by me !!

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