#which includes them as petty rivals for like 2 days as kids

[ballisters-lawyer]

Do I write a short few chapter homoerotic sparring fic to motivate myself or do I just jump straight into “a little death” and make you guys wait a bunch until we finally get to the homoerotic sparring?

[shycoconutt]

I Found My Light: Chapter 3 (Kakashi x Reader)

Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3

A/n: Sorry for the delay! Wasn't sure where I wanted to go with this but it came to me in the shower (as all good ideas do). Hope you enjoy it! This story is far from over.

Summary: You attend the group training session where, to your dismay, Kakashi is in attendance.

Word Count: 1800

Warnings: fem!reader, SFW (but won't be in future chapters), violence, angst

Fanart!: Please check out this fanart inspired by this fic by the talented @szamasza <3

If this training session goes like any other typical training session, you are in for a long one. Training usually begins around mid-day and lasts several hours until everyone feels like they’re on the brink of death. Then, when face down in the dirt, Asuma tries to convince everyone to head to the bar on the main street that gives discounts to shinobi. After a few minutes of resounding I’m-too-tireds and maybe-next-times, everyone gives in and spends the remainder of the night into the next morning crammed in a booth getting absolutely sloshed.

This night was like any other night, except not because your anxiety was at an all-time high.

Kakashi showed up about an hour into training, aloof as ever. You were deep in your spar with Genma when you saw him out of the corner of your eye. Genma must have noticed your distraction, as he didn’t hesitate to spit his senbon at you with full force. Luckily you were refocused in less than a second and caught it between your fingers.

“Nice try, buddy,” you teased him, “It’s going to take more than that to throw me off.”

Genma raised his eyebrow at you. “I don’t know, (y/n), you seemed a little distracted,” he teased.

And just like that, you were back at each other’s throats.

Kakashi ended up finding a spot sparing Gai. Typical of him, as usually Gai is the only one who can keep up ability-wise. Although, Kakashi hasn’t seen how much you’ve grown and a part of you is hoping you’ll get a chance at him. You still have yet to use your chakra sword-whip, your most brutal weapon, in front of your fellow shinobi. It’s remained in its sheath strapped across your back, waiting to be used against the most brutal opponent.

“Alright, alright,” Genma pants, curled up on the ground holding his left side where you just landed a forceful kick, “Please show me some mercy, (y/n).”

“Only if you admit that I’m a better shinobi than you in every way,” you say smugly, crossing your arms across your chest.

“Yes, you are a better shinobi than me in every way. You're stealthy, quick, strong, intelligent, adaptable, beautiful, and, most of all, kind. Which is why you’ll give me my senbon back.” He pleas, still laying on the ground with his hand out to you.

“Mmm, fine,” you tease, pulling the senbon from your hair where you used it to hold it in a bun. “It does make a great hair accessory though. I think I might have to get one for myself.” You help Gemma back up to his feet and stick the metal needle back into his mouth.

He gives you a smirk, still grasping onto your hand. “You should see my collection. I have at least two hundred of these,” he boasts, taking the senbon out of his mouth to twirl it in his fingers. “I‘ll make sure to pick one out for you.”

“I would be honored.” You smile warmly, squeezing his hand.

At this moment you could sense a set of eyes staring at you from the other side of the training field. Well, one eye, you should say, as Kakashi is staring directly at you while he holds Gai in a headlock. His expression is unreadable as his eyes flicker from you to Genma and then back to you. You could swear that you saw his shoulders drop a bit before he brought his attention back to Gai who is currently struggling to breathe in his grasp.

“Ka-ka-shi-ple-ase-le-t-me-go-” Gai gasps, holding onto Kakashi’s arms currently wrapped around his neck. Kakashi’s eyes widen when his attention is brought back to his opponent and he immediately releases Gai from his grasp. With a thud, Gai drops to the floor and sucks in one big breath.

“Are you trying to kill him?!” Kurenai yells as she runs to tend to Gai who is sitting on the ground rubbing his neck. Everyone else on the field stops what they’re doing when they notice the commotion and circle around Gai wondering what happened.

“I’m sorry-” Kakashi starts, hands back in his pockets still staring at Gai wide-eyed.

“Apologies are unnecessary my rival!” Gai cuts in, still gasping for air. “Flashes of my youth came to me as I was falling out of consciousness. It reminded me how much there is to live for. I thank you for the near-death experience, Kakashi!” Gai quickly recovers and stands up, dusting the dirt from his green jumpsuit. “You win this round, but I wouldn’t get used to it!” Gai challenges, holding out a hand for Kakashi to shake.

“Yeah, sure Gai.” Kakashi agrees sheepishly, accepting Gai’s hand.

“Damn, Kakashi.” Genma starts, a smug smile pulling at his mouth. “The Anbu made you a pretty ruthless fighter, huh? I didn’t realize friend-killer Kakashi applied to us too.”

You could hear everyone in the circle try to hold in their gasps after registering Genma’s statement. Kakashi’s whole body stiffened and you could see the appearance of a grimace form under his mask. He is visibly uncomfortable. Yet, instead of looking at Genma who just addressed him, he is looking at you.

You suck in a breath, feeling terrible for Kakashi. Rumors spread, nicknames are formed, it’s all a part of being a shinobi. But “friend-killer Kakashi” is on a whole other level of petty.

That jerk.

“Are you fucking kidding me, Genma?” You turn to him and yell. “What makes you think you can say shit like that?”

“Oh c’mon!” Genma retorts. “We were all thinking it! This is the first time he’s been back training with us since the Anbu. You’ve heard what people have said about him. I’m surprised one of us isn’t already dead!”

This time no one was able to hold in their reactions as gasps escaped everyone in the circle.

You are fuming.

“Actually, Genma, the only one you should be worried about killing you is me because I am a second away from shoving that stupid senbon down your throat.” You take a step forward, challenging him.

“Hey, hey,” Genma retreats, taking a step back with his hands up in defense. “I was just trying to look out for us, for you especially. I mean out of all of us, you should be the most concerned. You know, with the whole situation that happened with Ri-”

You close the gap between you and Genma in seconds, grabbing the collar of his vest, you yank the senbon from his mouth and hold it against his throat.

“If you finish that sentence it will be the last words you ever speak.” You threaten. “You have no idea what you’re talking about. You have no idea the details of what Kakashi has been through. What Rin went through. What I went through. It isn’t your place to speak about a situation you know nothing of. So do us all a favor and shut up.” You let go of his vest and shove him back a couple steps.

“Wow, damn, okay, sorry.” Genma apologizes, a hint of annoyance in his voice. “I was just joking around. There’s no need to be so serious about it, (y/n).”

“My hand went through Rin’s heart,” Kakashi speaks up from his silence. “There’s nothing to joke about.”

Hearing Kakashi speak this hard truth sends a sharp pain through your heart, and you instinctively grasp onto the part of your shirt lying over your chest.

You turn and look back at Kakashi, who meets your eyes.

Pain.

So much pain.

You turn to step towards him, but he’s already retreating from the circle.

“I think that’s it for me today guys. I’ll catch you around another time.” Kakashi says as he turns away from the group giving you one last glance. Heading towards the forest, he reaches around to his pouch and pulls out his Icha Icha novel, bringing it in front of him to pick up where he left off.

After a few silent beats, Asuma claps his hands together to bring attention to him.

“So,” he starts, “drinks anyone?”

Everyone immediately becomes more relaxed now that the focus has shifted. You, on the other hand, are feeling so tense that you start to hear ringing in your ears. You get that Asuma is just trying to relieve the tension in the group, but you can’t help but be annoyed that he’s trying to move on from what just happened so quickly.

Kurenai meets your gaze and can read your annoyance. She gives you a pleading look that says drop it for now, (y/n).

Everyone in the circle, including Genma, give a resounding “yes” and head in the opposite direction of Kakashi back towards the village. You're left alone standing in the middle of the grounds as they make their way out.

“(Y/n), are you coming?” Kurenai calls out to you.

You contemplate for a second and begin to wave her off.

“I think I’m going to stay here for a minute. You guys go on ahead, I’ll meet up with you later,” you reply. Honestly, you have no intention of getting back together with them, as any place where Genma is hanging out is the last place you want to be.

“Okay,” Asuma shouts back at you, “we will be at that one bar on main.”

“As always.” you joke back, trying to sound light-hearted.

Once they are out of sight you turn to look back at the trees that Kakashi exited through. You have absolutely no idea where he could be headed to or how fast he could be traveling through the trees. It might be a waste of time to head out after him. After all, if Kakashi doesn’t want to be found, you have no chance of finding him.

Feeling slightly defeated, you plop down to the ground and sit criss-cross in the dirt. You sit up straight and put both of your hands palm-up on each knee. Taking a deep breath in, you feel the breeze rustle through your hair. Taking a deep breath out, you hear the sound of the trees flowing in the wind.

If he wants to talk, he will come to me. In the meantime, I will meditate.

The next time you open your eyes, it’s dark out.

Damn, how many hours have passed?

You close your eyes.

More time passes.

The next time you open your eyes, Kakashi is sitting a few feet across from you mirroring your position.

His eyes are open.

As if your thoughts are mirroring each other as well, you both speak in unison.

“I’m sorry.”

[bewaretheidesofmarchyall]

Soulmate Shenanigans Part Two (Electric Boogaloo)

Good morning (or at least, I’ve started writing this in the morning! Who knows when I’ll complete it)!

I’m continuing my Soulmate AU Tomfoolery (you can find part one here)

Prompt #2

There is a timer that counts down to when you will meet your soulmate.

Warnings for death mentions, and temporary major character death

World Building

Everyone blames the mad scientist.

Which is fair. When someone makes billions of clocks in about a weeks time, each declaring when everyone in the world (including people who wouldn’t be born for decades) would find their soulmate, it’s considered to polite to stick around to answer questions

Instead, Logan disappeared to who-knows-where and left everyone else to pick up the pieces. 

Rude.

Ever since the early 1910′s, the clocks have existed, one for each person. When any kid is born, the first thing a new parent does is rush to the register to see when they’ll meet their soulmate. It’s a big deal.

If your child isn’t going to meet their soulmate in the next 13 years, they are told the exact number on their 13th birthday

Philosophers have been enraged by all of this. Is free will a thing? Is existence a lie?

Non-philosophers will often close their curtains when they see a wandering philosopher, which are easy to identify by their look of abject confusion and plucked chickens.

Characters

Remus: Remus pretended that he didn’t care about who his soulmate was when his 13th birthday rolled along. He wasn’t the best actor.

His brother seemed happy when he found out that it would be sixteen years until he found his soulmate. 29 wasn’t a bad age at all, considering that some people would have to wait until they were old and in a nursing home, or would never even meet their soulmate at all.

Remus waited for his parents to tell him. They gave each other nervous looks, and he was convinced for a few seconds that he didn’t have a soulmate after all.

The actual answer was much weirder

526 years. 526 years until he met his soulmate.

Remus said a silent thank you to his soulmate for making him functionally immortal. After all, that meant that he’d survive until then!

HE WAS IMMORTAL

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Now, whenever someone would try to say something like, “Why do you like serial killers? Planning to become one?”, he could just look them dead in the eye and say,

I’m going to outlive you, Brian

(On an unrelated note, Brian disappeared a few months later. It actually wasn’t Remus’s fault, surprisingly. One minute, he was at a museum, the next, gone)

Remus would be fine with never finding his soulmate, honestly. Connection is nice, but being eldritch is more fun.

Virgil: Virgil didn’t want to be immortal

Sure, he wasn’t a fan of dying in practice, but in theory he didn’t want to live to over 250!

His family and friends were going to die, and he’d have to live through it. And for what? To meet a soulmate? Who gave a fuck? Virgil had never wanted a romantic relationship in his life, and he didn’t think that a 526 year wait was going to change that.

He was determined to find his soulmate early so that he could live a normal life like a normal person who doesn’t cause additional distress to the wandering philosophers.

 Plot

It was easy to find Remus. Local Child Will Live To Over 500 makes a good headline, and Remus wasn’t one to shy away from attention.

When Virgil was 16, he packed his bags and ran away from home to go meet his soulmate. He didn’t ask Janus how he got the bus tickets, but he did ask him to tell his parents that he’d be okay.

Virgil knocked on the door, and waited. Someone who looked almost exactly like the news site photo answered. The conversation went something like this:

Virgil: So, YOU’RE Remus McFricking Sanders-

Roman: Nope, not him, whatever he said isn’t my fault.

[Roman slams door]

Virgil was pretty sure that he had, in fact, met Remus, and he was just being annoying. Roman believed that his brother had just manage to piss off yet another person.

Virgil retreated to a restaurant, and looked up the photo on the news article, just to make sure. No denying it, that was him! Same eyes, same hair, same general face-wait. 

Remus had a nose that had obviously been broken at least once. The guy who’d greeted him at the door had definitely been in less scrapes than his soulmate.

Whoops.

Meanwhile, Remus had a plan to avoid Virgil at all cost. Virgil had tried to shy away from press attention, but he tracked down a photo eventually. 

And when his brother told him that some emo with “awesome” eyes had turned up on the doorstep looking for him, he had a bad feeling.

Well, spooky boy wasn’t going to cost him his long future.

And so the dance began.

In one corner, Virgil, who had spite, stubbornness, and a deadline on his side (he had to get home to his parents eventually)! Never discount a spiteful Virgil!

In the other corner, Remus, who has nothing on his side but fate. Fate, however, has a sense of humor, and Remus read enough old myths as a child to know that whatever happens can’t be changed by petty human actions.

Virgil tries breaking and entering many times, each failing in a more ridiculous way. He is a careful, but Remus is practically Kevin McCallister in terms of traps, and he fails to meet his soulmate face to face all day and all night.

They do get to have some verbal exchanges, which are pretty much

Virgil: You think you want the existential hell of immortality??

Remus: Oh, fuck off, I’m going to have the best vampire aesthetic!

Virgil: The vampire aesthetic is wonderful, but can we do everything for aesthetic?

Both at the same time: Yes. Yes we can.

And then Virgil is herded out of the house by Remus’s pet rats.

However, the final encounter goes a little differently. No witty quips, just Virgil picking the lock of yet another window, and then a very specific sound.

Have you ever heard a stubborn emo get pulled into a portal in the spacetime continuum?

It’s a distinct sound that is along the lines of loud crash-The fu-whirring noises-nyoom-eerie silence 

Remus didn’t give a second thought before diving into the portal after him. If he had, he would have thought hey, this’ll probably bring us face to face, something I’ve been avoiding or maybe jumping into random portals in a stupid idea or I’m going to grab a weapon before just running at it. But his first impulse was to make sure his snarky soulmate hadn’t died, so into the portal he went.

The Year: 2550

The Portal: Glows a lot, thank you for asking

The Reason: A mad scientist has only one thing left to lose, and is terrified as it slips away

Logan: Logan was a geek at heart. He loved science, in both theories and practice. He probably should have toned down his obsession with Nikola Tesla. He wanted to travel to the sky, and touch the stars, and watch time like a film reel. 

Time travel was his passion. If people could travel across the physical seas, why not the metaphorical ones of time?

It was pure luck that he actually figured it out, but figure it out he did. Logan loved his creation.

He wanted to create a million inventions, but more importantly he wanted Patton to see them all.

If there was one thing he loved more than science, it was him. 

The two kept each other from drifting off into the stars, or sinking into the dirt because they’re too afraid of being rude. One of Logan’s favorite memories was he and Patton running through the St. Louis fair, giggling at terrible puns and sharing a quick kiss out of sight, before catching the next exposition. 

Patton was kind, and caring, and knew how to talk to people to get them to like him, and was just good. He was good. 

Logan dealt only in facts. And it was a fact that it would have been better, more fair for Logan to have died in the fire.

It was a fact that he didn’t (even though it felt like it sometimes). It was a fact that Patton had been the one to notice the smoke. It was a fact that the love of his life waited for a few seconds in the doorway, trying to call the cat out. It was a fact that, after Logan was out of the house, he turned around to see the doorway collapse. 

He found a way back into the house, but it took too long. 

Fact: Humans can only endure severe smoke inhalation for a few minutes before dying.

Logan took one look at his time machine, somehow still undamaged. He’d never tested it before, but he really didn’t have a choice, so he kissed Patton on the forehead and stepped into a portal.

Back To The Plot

Virgil and Remus immediately knew that they were in the 26th century. 

How? There was a sign!

Hey! If You Happen To Be A Time Traveler, This Is 2550! Check In With The Lord Cerebrum To Know More, Unless You Don’t Have A License, In Which Case

You Know What Happens

They don’t have much time to mull over this before Remus tries to murder Virgil. He’s not IMMORTAL any more, and it’s not FAIR, and it’s all HIS fault!

This is where we enter the Rivals To Friends (While On The Run From Time Management) section

Remus and Virgil have many adventures escaping from Time Management, while learning to appreciate the other as a friend. They are platonic soulmates, after all!

But Time Management is nothing if not patient, and the boys are caught eventually (you know how it goes. You forget to check around for listening ears, you use 21st century slang, and suddenly a single “yeet” and a “same” get you dragged before the Lord Cerebrum)

A Handy Dandy Guide To The Year 2550 (transcript from the Handy Dandy Infomercial Station)

Hey, time travelers! I know that everyone likes zipping around the time-stream and seeing what the fates throw at them to keep them from murdering their grandpa, but we have to do this by the Rules!

If you break the rules, you know what happens

The Year 2550 is protected by Logos Industries’s time dilation filter, to ensure that no one gets the wrong idea about going free range!

If you have a license, just proceed to the Lord Cerebrum to get your stamp of approval and philosopher disguise for the maximum positive effect! After all, Logos Industries needs funding to protect us all!

If you don’t have a license, you’ll see the Lord Cerebrum too!

Have a Handy Dandy Time :)

Back To The Plot

The boys are led through a menacing government facility, taken to see the Lord Cerebrum. They try to ask questions, but Time Management is rather disinterested in their fleeting existence, so nothing much gets answered.

The final destination is a computer room, where the Lord Cerebrum sits. His form was half hologram, half skin, his age unchanging for 526 years, and recognizable at first sight to Remus

Lord Cerebrum, aka Brain, aka Brian: Hey, Remus, what exactly did you say about outliving me?

Brian: Brian was a dick. There’s no other way to put it. 

He and Remus used to be friends, sticking brand new phones in water to see what would happen and planning out pranks (they made their history teacher think that she was being haunted by the ghost of Charlemagne!), but things changed, and by 8th grade his dickishness was on full display

It was really easy to get away with being cruel to Remus. He naturally unnerved people, and anyone in a position of power immediately knew he was trouble (which was true), so when there was a conflicting story between a star student and the kid who poured ketchup in the principal’s desk, you can guess who’d always get believed.

Brian was a dick, but he was 13. He could have grown later in life, regretted his ways (or at least stopped), but instead he touched an antique time machine on a museum tour of the Clock House (home of Logan, the famous inventor of soulmate clocks). 

He’d been planning to snap off the handle and pin it on Remus (or maybe Roman for variety), but instead

Crash-what the-whirring noises-nyoom-eerie silence

And Brian arrived in the year 2520, the first of many time travellers.

He became a celebrity. The parts of him lost in the wormhole were quickly replaced with state-of-the-art holograms, and his fame went to his head.

Thirty years of good marketing later, he was the Lord Cerebrum. And when a desperate mad scientist came crashing through a portal of his own, it was easy to get him to work for him under the promise that Brian would let him save his “Patton” once he made some technology for him.

He recognized Logan from the museum. He knew who’s fault it was that he was trapped travelling through time, whirling through the portal, praying and promising and in the end just screaming. Brian knew who was to blame for the fact that he couldn’t tell how much of his body would stay when the power went out.

So the tasks got longer and more complicated, Patton dangled like a carrot over Logan’s head. 

Fact: Logan would never win, and someday Brian would get tired of this game and there would only be one genius left in 2550.

Back To The Plot: Virgil punched the Lord Cerebrum in the face. He didn’t know all of the context, but his best friend seemed not to like the guy, and he seemed evil, so he punched the overlord in the face.

Brian was offended, and abandoned all plans for a monologue in favor of leaving them to die.

The most fitting way to do away with a time traveler is to send them everywhere at once. It’s an awful death, one where molecules are slowly lost as the traveler in question hits walls and trees and memories.

The duo managed to survive five or so timelines, before the machine miraculously shut off. A mad scientist ran into the room, unscrewed the vents in the walls, and told the teenagers that they’re late.

Things are explained as they escape the facility.

Things

Logan needed a way to break the time dilation filter. He did the math (which he tried and failed to explain to the boys), and it was determined that Remus and Virgil had the most butterfly effect capabilities to influence this particular event

Basically, removing them from the timeline changed things just enough for Logan to find the chink in the filter’s armor. 

The duo’s job is done, and Logan is only sorry that he didn’t find them earlier to get them home.

Back To The Plot

Everything seems like it’s going to be fine, and the duo are almost able to go home, when the Lord Cerebrum finds them.

CLIMATIC SHOWDOWN

An Ending

In the end, Brian is sent to the 22th century, the year where nearly all of humanity were turned into giant rats for some reason

Logan found his way back to the 1910′s, and used the 26th century technology to heal his love. The time machine burned in the fire. Good. Space travel was where it was at, anyway.

Virgil had so much explaining to do to his parents

Remus knew that no one would believe him. Roman did.

Virgil and Remus stayed the closest of friends. They dressed up as vampires for Halloween. They stuck together. They got to grow up. 

More soulmate shenanigans, amiright?

[dungeonsanddragonsfifthedition]

I don’t know your d&d characters but choose anyone for 1, 4, 34, 60, 75, 89

oc questions!

under a cut!

what’s a unique skill they have? is there any reason why they can do it?

ori’s medical/first aid skills are by-and-large ahead of the curve because of her training as a youth? but also she’s meshed that training with a lot of self-taught stuff, which makes her techniques very different than anyone else. she’s special <3

anthe is very good at. okay i don’t think she thinks this, but. her magic is more drawn from her concern for people around her and her own feelings than from her faith in the gods. i’ve sort of talked before about how anthe’s faith in avandra is largely performative--she wants to do her family proud! and she wants the gods to approve of her for their sake. but. yeah.

des is really good at mediating arguments, just by nature of their vibes. they’re just chill and they’re good at comforting people!!! like that’s their right is the thing. +11 to persuasion for ten minutes every short rest <3

are they a good gift-giver? what do they tend to give as gifts?

ori’s not a gift giver. i think... the sort of gifts she does give are practical in nature--information to help somebody, medicine, a weapon. that’s how she works. oritrauma definitely includes a thought that frivolous gifts only lead to emotional endangerment. maybe she will draw something for people in the party. she has before but then she’s burned the pieces out of embarrassment before giving them away.

anthe LOVES gift-giving. mostly she gives out spell components or flower crowns or little tiny crafts. cooking/baking is her main mode of gift-giving, though. also spells!!! when she uses spells 2 help people (outside of like. healing. that’s her job.) that is very much a mode of gift-giving for her, too.

des will make little metal trinkets for people! they give out gifts when they can, y’know? it’s not their top priority in a friendship or other relationship at all, though.

what’s their favourite drink? (coffee, tea, juice, hot chocolate, soda, etc)

all of them. all of them drink herbal or floral tea that they make themselves. this is one of my constants. in terms of alcohol...

ori goes for mead, usually, if that’s an option, or a nice red wine. but she’ll drink anything. anthe likes extremely sweet mixed drinks that get her drunk fast, but will also drink anything. anthe would drink absinthe on a dare. and des doesn’t drink much? but when they do, it’s usually beer or rum. nothing strong.

what sappy thing will they cry at? (romance movies, cute cat videos, etc) would they deny crying about it later on?

ori is the type to cry at romance movies. easily. she will deny it.

anthe cries at animal friendship videos. and the like. openly. in front of everyone.

des cries at kids’ cartoons. they won’t deny it, but will point out everyone else who is crying.

is there anyone they consider their rival?

ori has no rivals. that’s dumb. maybe her brother, when they were kids, but only in a loving way.

anthe’s is... ziggy? i guess? it’s way past rivals for her at this point though, like. she’s genuinely angry at him and will be for a long time.

des doesn’t do that shit.

what would they get into a petty argument over?

ori will get mad about extraplanar minutiae, like. she will argue the facts about demons versus devils versus fae versus versus versus all day long. the terminology matters to her.

anthe argues over everything, always.

des doesn’t get petty. let it go, man. it’s all chill over here.

[busterofbeing]

Ranking The Page Classpects

I'm going to do my best to rank all the page classpects, from best to worst. Fair warning: most of these classpects are pretty bad. When making this list, I sorted out the bad from the awful and started putting the worst ones on and work my way up. If a classpect is high up, it doesn't mean it's good; it just means it sucks less than the ones below it.

Here's my take on page class. First: the page starts off weak, but if they manage to reach their true potential they are "second to none". This is stated in canon. Second: the journey of a page typically takes the entire session. Of the pages we've seen, they're journeys haven't been the best; Jake didn't reach his true potential until his fight with LE (or before [S] Game Over in the game over timeline), both events happened the last day or well after the last day of the session. Tavros, the page of breath, didn't realize his true potential until he was dead. Yeah. We see Tavros rally the troll army to fight LE with just his friendliness, charm and flexibility (part of the breath aspect); a feat that only Aranea, a troll with eons worth of mind control practice could achieve. Keep in mind a page reaching their full potential applies to the emotional side of them as well; not just the fancy powers they get. Horuss, the page of void, never realizes his full potential. For this list, I ranked under the presumption that it generally takes a page almost the entire session to realize their true potential, if they manage to at all. Third: Pages are challenged by, yet embody their aspect. Jake has a good-natured demeanor and is positive, yet he can't see possibilities to escape his relationship with Dirk, and isn't optimistic about the ones presented. Tavros leads without realizing it during the afterlife and is pretty flexible, yet has a tough time changing throughout Hivebent and literally could not move, all parts of the Breath aspect. Horuss is certainly a void player, but is challenged because he sees everything, and can't embody or focus on nothing. Part of the page's journey is to overcome their emotional challenges, meaning they start off challenged by their aspect in some way. Fourth: The Page serves their aspect or serves through their aspect for themselves (this is probably the most widely debated point here). Lastly, a page can weaponize their aspect. Okay! Now to the list...

1.) Page of Rage 2.) Page of Life 3.) Page of Hope 4.) Page of Void 5.) Page of Time 6.) Page of Doom 7.) Page of Mind 8.) Page of Light 9.) Page of Space 10.) Page of Heart 11.) Page of Blood 12.) Page of Breath

1.) Page of Rage

I put this for number one because it seems to be the least problematic of the bunch. Rage-bound can be dangerous, so a person challenged by rage likely wouldn't be a problem to the session. A Page of Rage might start out as a pacifist, and part of their journey is learning when to step up for themselves and fight. As for powers- we know Gamzee (a non-god tier) delivered the most powerful blow to the Black King, so Rage-bound are capable of dealing massive, if unpredictable damage. A PoR would no doubt deal insane damage once fully realized.

2.) Page of Life

I’m gonna say it, probably the worst life classpect besides maybe bard. They'll go through most of their session as an okay healer- maybe they can heal wounds or injuries at best. As a person, they would either be bad at helping and taking care of people, or they help in the wrong way. They would probably be annoying to deal with in a session- whenever they try to help, they just make things worse or make people upset. a PoL would need to learn how to take care of people and actually build them up. Fully realized, however, they would be the best healer in the game. They'd certainly be capable of revival, and could rapidly heal, especially themselves. A passive self-regeneration ability? A fully realized PoL would be a very useful ally in the fight against the Black King.

3.) Page of Hope

Jake showed us a PoH can still be hopeful, although maybe not the best source of hope and trust. Either way, the PoH doesn't seem to be a nonconstructive classpect. At their worst they might selfish or bad at having hope (especially for themselves, as Jake showed dealing with his Dirk problems). Jake also demonstrated a fully realized PoH can be deadly, apparently rivaling the power of the green sun when Jade attempts to overpower him. Not too shabby.

4.) Page of Void

As Horuss himself states, this is a confusing classpect. How does one realize the full potential of nothingness? A PoV would likely start out confused about who they are or what they want to be, and their biggest problem is that they see infinite possibilities and are overwhelmed, again, as Horuss himself states. A PoV would need to learn to be okay with not knowing every possibility, and would need to learn how to "void out" possibilities and find out what their strengths are. Think of a kid who has no clue what they want to do or be when they grow up. A fully realized PoV would have excellent voidy powers, easily become invisible and untraceable. They'd be able to create a sort of void cloud (if that makes sense) around people, although it would be stronger with them. Black holes are also a possibility.

5.) Page of Time

A PoT would likely start out either being way too violent and selfish and/or would struggle with accepting the end of things. If they got a grade on an assignment they felt they didn't deserve, they'd be the ones to argue a better grade, even if they've been told it's final. The journey of a PoT would force them to accept the inevitability of things, and would challenge them to be less violent in their reactions and use their time powers for good, and not petty or zealous reasons. Their time powers in question wouldn't be great. Perhaps they can only travel forward or back in time by only an hour? The biggest problem would be their mastery over their powers. Being violent, selfish, and inexperienced brings plenty of danger to other players (revenge?), and could create many doomed timelines if the PoT wasn't careful. A fully realized PoT would be an excellent fighter, maybe they could even go back in time and fix all their mistakes they made with their powers? Either way, their powers are more potent when they benefit the PoT rather than other players.

6.) Page of Doom

This is a tricky one. Being challenged by doom could mean the PoD is always doomed and must overcome said doom, or they simply aren't doomed and need to accept doom. Combined with fully realized powers, this makes the PoD a personified nuclear bomb, at least in my opinion. Using doom as a powerful weapon could be really good against an impressive foe, or could wipe out the players or even part of a session. It's very unclear which would be the case, so I stuck this classpect in the middle of the list. Another interpretation is that they serve themselves with doom. This could manifest as using doomed people/players to get what they want, which is basically slave labor. Not cool.  Very unpredictable, the co-players must be very wary of a PoD. 

7.) Page of Mind

Alright, here's where the mediocre gets sucky. A PoM would be challenged be decision-making and logic. Maybe they like thought and logic, but aren't good at it. Think an enthusiastic but bad chess player. Or perhaps they might be decent thinkers, but they're too indecisive to put that mind power to use or can't make decisions quick enough. Either way, they wouldn't be constructive to the session because they either can't think/strategist or they can't because they don't know which option they should pick. A fully realized PoM would be an excellent strategist (picture Ender from the Ender series), capable of finding weak points, using strategy to maximize damages, and being able to predict an attack. Powers would include said prediction, maybe they'd be able to visualize the field and how their strategies would play out before they make a move?

8.) Page of Light

 Uy. I don't like this classpect. A light player is valuable because they can provide information, critical to a game like SBurb. Being a PoL, they'd be challenged by light and would either not be able to get information, or wouldn't understand and apply it well. Because this is an active class, they wouldn't be inclined to share this information or their insight with the team. They might also be unlucky. A PoL might also struggle with being in the spotlight; maybe they have stage-fright? Maybe they don't handle attention well and are insecure? A PoL will need to become comfortable with having attention and dealing with it accordingly. A fully realized PoL would have great powers and could get very lucky. The informational part wouldn't be as useful. What's the use of a walk through if you don't get it until the final boss? Eh, they might be able to adapt to what's going on in a battle and fight according to that info.

9.) Page of Space

A PoS would be challenged by space, let's start there. This applies to personal as well as physical space. A PoS might be very disorganized, and/or would have serious issues with *personal space*. Get it? The space aspect, as alternate Calliope tells us, is a lonely aspect. A PoS might have a tough time balancing "people time" and "alone time", and not being able to get help or be left alone (whichever is the problem) would pose a challenge to a PoS. The really bad thing about this classpect is that a space player is required in a null or fruitful session, and is responsible for breeding the Genesis Frog. I don't know about you, but I wouldn't want a disorganized person literally challenged by space to be handling the creation of a new universe. The saving grace is that a PoS would be very powerful, rivaling or surpassing Jade's powers (remember she gained the power of the green sun!). Emotionally, a realized PoS would be able to manage their space and personal space well. They'd be able to benefit themselves by being organized and having more/less alone time.

10.) Page of Heart

Challenged by people skills and the self. Their classpect literally means "to serve the self". A PoH would be very obsessed with building up their image and reputation, but would be horrible at dealing with relationships. They wouldn't be kind, and changing would be hard. Because of the fact they will serve themselves, and aren't very good at it, they're nonconstructive to themselves as well as their co-players. A PoH would need to learn to be themselves in order to build their reputation, and that in order to be emotionally stable they'll need to be willing to change and also be open to others. In terms of powers, we don't have much to go off of. Maybe they can fake fake their identity to get behind enemy lines and gain an advantage? Their source of strength would be their own soul, so being emotionally healthy (hard in SBurb) is quite necessary in order to be a good PoH. Overall, an unhelpful class that doesn't have a big payoff when they reach their full potential.

11.) Page of Blood

Oh boy. I've been waiting to roast these last two classpects forever. The PoB is a VERY bad classpect. This is a leader aspect, meaning a PoB will likely be the leader in a session. Here's the problem- they're a page. They're inherently challenged by being able to lead and unify. "Serving themselves through unity" would manifest itself as a PoB wanting to delegate tasks or organize people to benefit their own desires or agenda, which could be very detrimental when playing SBurb. A PoB might even drive people away rather than bring them together. A PoB would need to learn how to lead, and how to lead and unify well. Fully realized, a PoB would basically be a powerful army general. Their fully realized blood powers would likely grant their teammates major power boosts, which could be very useful, especially if they're powerful to begin with. This would make the PoB a personified mega-steroid. In terms of combative powers, we actually have no clue what the powers of a blood player are, so I can't say.

12.) Page of Breath

AKA: The Roast of Tavros. This classpect. This. Classpect. It suffers from the same problem PoB does; you're not going to be a good leader throughout the session. And what's the point of an awesome leader if you're not going to actually get the awesome leader when you need to, you know, LEAD A SESSION?! At least you might have a good leader for the final battle and into the new universe, if you made it. The double whammy to this classpect is that being a PoB, they would struggle with change. Pages need to change to realize their true potential. A Page of Breath is bad at changing. DO YOU SEE THE PROBLEM HERE!? This is easily one of the worst classpects, it's very design has such anti-synergy that will make a PoB fundamentally useless. A PoB would need to learn to be flexible and actually accept change. Being challenged by movement, they might be slow or bad at moving. As stated earlier, Tavros starts out without the use of his legs, literally embodying this fact. A fully realized PoB would be a great leader. They would be very fast and great at moving (Tavros dances when he dumbfounds Vriska), and would have powerful windy powers. Does it make up for the journey? ... The answer should be painfully obvious.

Thanks for listening to my ramblings. I put a lot of thought into this list and the classpects, I hope you enjoy! Leave your thoughts in the comments!

[iohourtime]

Moeyo Ken (Burn! O Sword) - Novel Recap 2

This is the second part of the recap of Moeyo Ken, which will be adapted into a 2020 movie directed by Harada Masato. I will talk about the characters as they were described in the novel in more detail. If you want to learn more about the background of the novel and a brief description of the plot, please click here for the first post. This post will have spoilers.

The Characters

I am going to go with this order instead of the order of the cast list: Oyuki (Shibasaki Kou), Serizawa Kamo (Ito Hideaki), Hijikata Toshizo (Okada Junichi), Kondo Isami (Suzuki Ryohei), and Okita Souji (Yamada Ryosuke).

Oyuki

She was an original character created by Shiba to serve as the love of Hijikata’s life. Historically, there were no records of Hijikata forming deep attachments with any women. She followed her late samurai husband from Edo to Kyoto to learn to paint, so when he died, she continued to live there. Hijikata literally stumbled into her small apartment after a fight and fell in love immediately, but he treated her with respect (i.e. he didn’t immediately try to sleep with her). He viewed her as more than his wife1 and even took 2 days off to spend some time with her. (The man never took time off.) She was strong willed, kind and loved Hijikata, but that was pretty much her whole storyline. Based on filming reports, it seems like Harada is bringing her character into the story much earlier than the novel, and she's number two on the cast list, so maybe she has a bigger role in the movie.

Serizawa Kamo

He was the first commander of the Shinsengumi. Serizawa Kamo was not his real name and there were rumours that he was hiding from something. Kamo means duck, actually, which was an odd choice. Anyway, although his gang occupied key positions within the group, Hijikata made sure the real operational power rested with the Vice Commander and the team leaders, which were mostly filled with Kondo’s gang. Hijikata also asked Kondo to play a fool in front of Serizawa's gang so they wouldn't suspect the eventual coup.

Serizawa was crude and petty. One time, he killed a sumo wrestler because the guy took his preferred spot or something petty like that. He also fired a canon at a rich family's mansion to get protection money from them. The Bakufu was horrified and secretly told Kondo and Hijikata to get rid of him, not that they weren’t already plotting to do so. Okita once made a strange comment2 about how Serizawa might be the most “innocent” of them all, and director Harada said he wanted to explore that in the movie. I don’t know what to make of it since Serizawa was portrayed as a brute in both novels. Perhaps Okita meant he had no agenda? I don’t know. That Souji was a strange boy.

Anyway, Kondo’s faction made one of Serizawa’s right-hand man commit seppuku for failing the bushido. This move weakened Serizawa's faction and although he was angry, he did nothing to retaliate or protect himself. On the night of Serizawa's assassination, the kill squad disguised themselves as ronin and surprised Serizawa when he was being amorous with his mistress. They also killed anyone who might recognize then. After Serizawa’s death, the other 3 members were either killed in a fight or forced to commit seppuku.

The Trio

The Shinsengumi was really controlled by Kondo and Hijikata, though no one wanted to admit it. Since Okita had them wrapped around his little fingers, he was the big boss! (Kidding 😁) Taking both novels into account, I think Kondo was the face of the group, Hijikata was the guy who got things done, and Okita was the guy who knew everything including gossips, but only dropped cryptic hints when it was warranted.

Warning: major spoilers coming up.

Hijikata Toshizo

Hijikata Toshizo started off as an aimless punk (a baragaki) who dreamed of becoming a samurai. He even wore his hair pseudo samurai style, which was not what farmers did back then. He was rather handsome with cool and refreshing eyes and women loved him. He loved to sleep with women who he perceived to be above his social status. The first few pages of the novel were rather shocking to my modern sensibilities - his conquering of this priest’s daughter was straight up rapey, even though the reader was reminded that it was how things were back in those days and the girl subconsciously expected him to drop by or some $hit like that. I don't know why Shiba put in this fictional detail because it's unnecessary to the plot. Even if it presented a contrast to the man he eventually became, it's not like Toshizo didn't already do a lot of questionable things early on. Perhaps he hated Toshizo? 😅

Anyway, he started an affair with a woman with status he met during a temple (sex) festival3. Unfortunately, when he got caught sneaking out of her room one night, he accidentally killed a well known swordsman. This incident drove the story in the Hino arc as Shichiri, a member of a rival dojo, seeked justice for the dead (really an excuse to get rid of a business rival). Toshizo got into a few battles of wits & strength with Shichiri, through which we learned that despite Toshizo being a farm boy, he was a natural born strategist who specialized in guerilla warfare.

The Shinsengumi gave Toshizo a life purpose and allowed him to show off his organisational management skills. At that time in Japan, military and police organizations assigned two people doing the same job. Toshizo recognized the inefficiency in the structure, especially if they needed to mobilize quickly, so he borrowed from the French army and introduced this revolutionary idea of having only one person in each position and splitting up the group into teams with different responsibilities that report up to an executive branch. Yes, it sounded logical now but it was radical back then! The most important thing was that he transferred the real power to the vice commander level.

Toshizo was gruff, undiplomatic, and ruthless in achieving his goals. He did come up with the harsh Shinsengumi code after all. In fact, Souji once told him that the Shinsengumi members kind of hated him. Even Souji hated him for a minute because of Yamanami. But as Toshizo told Souji afterwards, he chose to be hated. He just wanted Shinsengumi to become a force to behold and for Kondo to succeed as its leader, so he took on the bad guy disciplinary role in order that the members would continue to love and admire Kondo.

Toshizo also hated the academic type, so he butted heads with Yamanami and Ito. His distaste and distrust were partly born out of his own lack of education. He felt that educated people only knew how to talk theory and kiss ass, and they impeded his ability to do real work. (And jealousy?)

In the battle of Toba-Fushimi, even though the Bakufu suffered a huge loss, Hijikata’s squad was the only one that managed to do some damage against the modern Western artillery. The Bakufu started to notice Hijikata’s military prowess and eventually made him a vice commander in the army. He really came into his own in the northern arc after Kondo was gone.

The continuous battles and deaths really took a toll on Toshizo. Earlier in the novel, while strolling with Souji, he said he liked spring. Souji commented that people who liked spring tend to place their hopes and dreams in tomorrow. Yet in Toshizo’s final days, he told one of his underlings that he only fought for today. In one memorable scene before the final battle, he saw the spirits of his friends in his room. They all looked tired to him. Knowing it was time to end so everyone could rest, he sent his page Ichimura Tetsunosuke4 and Saito Hajime away on missions, saving their lives so they could pass on the stories of the fallen brothers. For Toshizo, instead of surrendering, he chose to face his enemies head on - fighting for the Shinsengumi and going out in a blaze. He was killed by a bullet5.

As Shiba himself said, Kondo was a hero during the peaceful times, but Hijikata was a hero during chaos. As much as the Shinsengumi was born in the wrong time, Toshizo was in his element. I'll let Toshizo himself summarize his world view with what he told Souji:

_"This is a sword. A sword is made by a craftsman to kill. The sword's characteristic and purpose are both simple. It's just like the military strategy books describe, its only purpose is to defeat the event. But look, look at the pure beauty. A sword is more beautiful than a beautiful woman. When I see beautiful women in front of me, I won't feel nervous. The beauty possessed by a sword could melt the stone heart of a man, and took a strong hold of him. That's why our purpose needs to be pure, our thoughts need to be pure. The Shinsengumi can only exist for this integrity. Souji, for me, no matter how the world changers, or whether Bakufu admit defeat and surrender, if I have a single breathe left, I'll persevere. Can I waver like Kondo? Up to now, I've covered my hands with blood to protect Shinsengumi. Serizawa, Yamanami, Ito… they all did by my hands. Why did I kill them? When they died, they were all facing death without wavering. If I waver now, then how do I face them in the afterlife? The journey of a man - is to create beauty, my own beauty. This is what I firmly believe." _(A very dude thing to say. 😏)

Kondo Isami

Kondo Isami was Toshizo's best buddy, or “sworn brother”. He was the fourth master of TRR. According to other people's description, he was a true leader, easygoing and generally loved by the squad. I didn't see any incident in the novel that supported that except for his command over the Ikedaya mission and what others said about him.

He was an uneducated farmer, so he loved hanging out with the educated people, yet he got jealous of them when they became more popular than him. Unfortunately, he was also very susceptible to flattery, so he tended to keep sycophants around him. Once he got a taste of success, he started politicking with the Bakufu, keeping mistresses and dressing above his station, and was quite concerned about status. So perhaps he would have been a good leader in peaceful times, he really came apart when things turned, making bad decision after decision. In other words, I kinda hated this novel's version of him. (I think he's normally portrayed in better light. 😅) Actually, I think Shiba disliked him too, as his depiction in both novels were not flattering. He was basically a fool who thought he was clever. Again, this may not be how he was in real life.

While Kondo might seem like a forthcoming guy, remember how he conned Serizawa's gang into believing he was weak and foolish. He also fooled Ito by pretending to become Tobaku, when he was just trying to get him drunk enough to be assassinated by Hijikata's team.

As the Shinsengumi grew, Kondo and Toshizo's vision started to diverge. Kondo cared more about becoming a daimyo (a feudal lord with land) while Toshizo wanted to expand. Kondo was so blinded by the land the Bakufu promised that he didn't realize they were going on a hopeless mission to take Koshu. In the end, Kondo and Toshizo parted ways in Nagareyama due to ideological differences: Kondo wanted to surrender and Toshizo tried to get Kondo to go with him.

Toshizo: When we were on the rise, you were such a great leader; now that we were going down, you changed and no longer want your dream.

Kondo: That's right. I don't want to be remembered as a traitor. I'm not like you. I understand the meaning of greater good.

Toshizo: The power structure changes with time, but isn't surrendering shameful for a man? Win or lose, it's not important. As a man, it's most important to follow one's dreams or die trying.

Kondo: For me, it's more important to follow the right path. Even though we had been comrades in battle forever, did we ever really had a common goal? Let's go our separate ways now.

Toshizo: I don't care. You're coming with me.

Kondo: Thanks for being there for me, but Toshi, please set me free. You built Shinsengumi and made me the commander, but looking back, the Kondo Isami then didn't feel like me. Let me go.

With that, Kondo left. Toshizo didn't chase after him but vowed to keep pursuing his dream. Shortly after, Kondo was captured and executed by the new government. So for someone who was concerned about his name, it was a sad way to go.

Okita Souji

Okita Souji was one of the youngest members of Shinsengumi. He was technically Toshizo’s senpai at TRR since he started learning kenjutsu at the age of 9. He first showed up in the novel when Kondo asked him to investigate Shichiri's dojo. Here was what Shiba casually mentioned in the first 4 pages he appeared.

“Okita bit down on his cute lips and grinned” [while telling Toshizi he was dumb].

“This young man of around 20 looked quite handsome in this outfit” [thought Toshizo].

“Okita was very well spoken due to his good upbringing and he also had a face as beautiful as that of an irokoshou*”, [Toshizo thought as he watched Souji greet the enemy].

_* A koshou refers to a page for a general. They are typically younger boys (15 or so) and were sort of like their personal assistants. An irokoshou was the type of page that also serviced the general sexually… so they tend to be extremely beautiful. _

So, Shiba really wanted the readers to know how good looking Souji was above all else. The novel likely solidified Okita Souji’s short, pretty boy image6 in popular media for decades.

Souji was said to be very innocent, childlike, and polite. When he wasn't working, you could find him playing with children who lived near Mibu Dera. He was smart as well. In the Hino arc, whenever Toshizo started describing the plan of attack, e.g. if Toshi said “you three go to this bridge in the cover of darkness”, Souji would immediately know what strategy he was going for.

Souji's swordsmanship was explained with an anecdote. Toshizo and Souji were challenged by Shichiri to a 2-on-2 duel. Toshizo knew Shichiri would try to lure them into a trap, so he planned a sneak attack. Souji was naturally nervous as he had never killed before, yet he still managed to kill 3+ of the 20 or so enemies. After they escaped, Toshizo was dumbfounded when he noticed Souji didn't get a single drop off blood on his clothes after killing all those people with a sword.

Souji didn’t seem to have any ambition. He was just following his “brothers” when he joined the roshigumi. In his own words, "I'll follow Kondo and Hijikata-san even to hell, although it would be nice if we are going to heaven." What Shiba emphasized in the novel was Toshizo and Souji's bond. In my opinion, Toshizo loved and spoiled Souji unconditionally and unlike most people, Souji could say anything to Toshizo and get away with it. Some examples:

"If you have time, you should read more books, then maybe you can become a good strategist too." That came after Toshizo started laying out his battle strategy.

After Toshizo explained why he chose to be the bad guy, Souji apologized, "I'm too dumb. I didn't know you did all that so the guys won't have to hate Kondo-san." Hearing this coming out of Okita's mouth, Toshizo felt like he was being teased. [Souji added], "Of course, it is also a personality thing."

I guess Toshizo couldn't get mad when Souji said this stuff while “tilting his cute head”. It is always a bit unclear if Souji just had no filter or if he was throwing shade.

Here is one of the most famous HijiOki scene from the novel. Toshizo might be your typical macho man, but he had a secret. Once a month, he would lock himself in his room and everybody would freaked out because they didn't know what he was up to. Except Souji of course. He knocked and cheekily listened to Toshizo frantically tidying up. Souji casually walked into the room and snatched the "Hougiku collection of haikus" from its hiding place. Yes, Toshi wrote spectacularly bad haikus under the pen name of Hougiku (this actually exists)7. Even though Toshizo was embarrassed, he still waited expectantly for Souji's critique of his new work and lit up when Souji said one of them was OK. (Pretty low standards. 😅)

Hijikata opened up to Souji about everything, especially matters of love. When Toshizo got back to HQ after getting injured and meeting Oyuki, Souji went to see him right after the doctor left.

Souji: You got me all worried!

_Toshizo: Sorry… I almost didn’t make it back. But Souji, I think I have fallen for a woman. _

Souji: Eh?

Toshizo: Don’t tell anyone, especially Kondo.

Souji: Then why are you telling me?

Toshizo: You are different.

Souji: Why am I different? Please don’t make me your love counsel.

Toshizo: Ha ha. You are!

I think Shiba intentionally got us to like the cute, childlike, and slightly devilish Souji to make the next part hurt. Souji did not die in battle. Instead, he spent a couple of years wasting away due to tuberculosis. Back then, tuberculosis was basically a death sentence. Once you contracted the disease, it was just a question of how long you have. Shiba didn’t go into details in Moeyo Ken, but in Shinsengumi Keppuroku, after about 2 hours of intense fighting at Ikedaya, Souji started coughing blood. Of course, he was such a badass he managed to chop off his assailant’s head before passing out8. The first time we saw him cough blood in Moeyo Ken was when he chased after Yamanami. (His illness was foreshadowed early on.)

Yamanami Keisuke decided he was done with the Shinsengumi. As you may recall, leaving the group was punishable by death and Toshizo was not going to make an exception. Even though Souji looked at Yamanami like a brother, Toshizo sent him to bring Yamanami back. For the first time in the novel, Souji looked horrified but he still complied. He set out on horseback but because of the cold winter air, he started coughing. He saw the blood on his gloves and thought "I'm going to die soon", though not with sadness or fear. He never seemed too bothered by his own mortality. Souji found Yamanami, who simply said had Toshizo sent anyone else, he'd kill him. Souji told Yamanami he could kill him and make a run for it. Perhaps Souji knew he was going to die anyway and was willing to let Yamanami escape? It didn't matter. Yamanami accepted his fate and asked Souji to be his second for his seppuku.

Souji was basically bedridden in the second volume, rapidly losing weight because he couldn't eat properly. He stopped taking all medicine except for Toshizo's family medicine because Toshizo told him those were effective. Like all fictional characters, as he got sicker, he grew more beautiful and "translucent" (透明感). One thing that never changed was his brilliant smile. He was so blasé about his inevitable death that Kondo found it fascinating.

He still had some pride though. When Yamazaki died, the squad decided to give him a funeral at sea and Souji went with them. He insisted on walking up and down the stairs by himself because he didn't want people see the captain of the first unit be so weak that he needed to be carried. At that time, he already lost half his lung capacity, so even the simple task of walking was a struggle. That didn't stop him from teasing Toshizo when he got a chance.

Perhaps nobody saw the end of Shinsengumi better than this dying young man. The night before the Toba-Fushimi battle, Toshizo went to see him. After talking, Souji suddenly looked at the ceiling and said "Youth is over." Was he talking about himself, or about the many Shinsengumi brothers who would die in the upcoming battles? Toshizo cried.

Even when he was sick, he still worried about Toshizo's love life. 😅 He made sure Toshizo knew Oyuki had moved to Osaka so he could see her. Before he died, Souji also asked a friend to look after Oyuki and made sure she could go see Toshizo in Hakodate afterwards.

Souji spent his final days back home. His sister, Mitsu, tried to stay with him for as long as she could but her husband would be transferred to Edo at any moment. When that day came, she would have to say goodbye to her baby brother forever. That day eventually came. When Souji heard the news, his face was crestfallen for a second before regaining his trademark smile. He held out his now bony hand for Mitsu to hold, but she didn't understand. The siblings talked about some trivial things and their parents. Suddenly, Souji asked, "When dad died, I was just 5 or 6. When I die, will I see them there?" Mitsu finally understood why he wanted her to hold his hand. "Don't be silly. You still have to get better and get a wife." Souji didn't answer. He just asked, "after I'm gone, will there be anyone to light an incense for me (i.e. remember me)?"

Around a month later, they found him dead, collapsed in the hallway, clutching his favorite sword. Legend said he was trying to kill a black cat (a bad omen) but instead, he lost his life. He was buried in the family plot in Tokyo. The following obituary was written about his short life.

"Okita Souji Kaneyoshi studied under Kondo Shusuke, the 3rd heir of Tennen Rishin Ryo since a young age and shown some talent. When he was 12, he faced Oahu Shirakawa Abe clan (?) in a duel and won. He made a name for himself in that clan.

Souji, formerly Sojiro Harumasa, later changed his name to Kaneyoshi. In the 3rd year of the Bankyu era, he joined the newly established Shinsengumi. At the tender age of 20, he became the assistant to the vice commander and captain of the first unit, participating in many missions.

_Unfortunately, life wasn't fair and he was not able to live to an old age. On the 30th day of May in the 4th year of the Keio era, he regretfully passed away." _

He was 24. Even though Kondo was executed a month before, he never found out about it. He died still believing his two “brothers” were alive, still fighting for their dreams.

Okita Souji in Moeyo Ken could seem a bit one dimensional - cute, cheerful, childlike. But was he? Souji was also the captain of the first unit, who probably had one of the highest kill count in the squad. Perhaps his desire to do anything to protect his beloved “brothers” outweigh his gentle nature. As so little was known about Souji, it would remain a mystery.

Notes

Back then, many marriages were arranged so the relationships might not be that great. Guys with Hijikata's rank typically had a mistress or two. Kondo had 3 separate households in Kyoto. ↩︎

In Shinsegumi Keppuroku’s “Assasination of Serizawa Kamo” chapter, which Harada mistakenly attributed to Moeyo Ken in his director’s comment on the movie’s website. ↩︎

Supposedly people in that period were pretty open about sex. So there were these festivals held at the temple where you could look for willing partners. Then they turned off the lights and you get down to business in the dark with the partner of your chose earlier. ↩︎

He was 15 when he tried to sign up with the Shinsengumi before the Toba-Fushimi battle. Although Hijikata knew he was lying about his age, he kept Ichimura as his koshou (page) because he looked like Souji. 😏 ↩︎

There is some debate as to whether the bullet came from the enemy side or his own side. ↩︎

There is very little known about Okita Souji as there were no photos or drawings. There were some fake photos online plus a drawing of what they thought he looked like based on pictures of his grand-nephew, although his family said he didn’t look like that painting. In some records, it was said that Okita was tall, his face was like a flounder, and he slouched, although he had a friendly smile. In another account, he was small and cute. In live action shows, he is generally depicted as having the Samurai / bald hairstyle. ↩︎

Here's a sample: "Even if a single plum flower blossoms, a plum is a plum." Yeah, I’m not sure what that means either. https://mag.japaaan.com/archives/27079 ↩︎

Apparently, once you start to cough blood, you don’t have long to live. Ikedaya happened a while before Souji’s death and since then, he participated in a few other missions, so it is quite unlikely he passed out due to TB. It is generally thought that he passed out due to an unrelated illness or heat stroke. ↩︎

[hethrewmyheartinthecut]

THE PHOENIX WILL RISE  (2/?)

<< ALFIE x TOMMY. SCI-FI. PAIN. >>

twelve days before.

“Dad, I’m hungry,” Charlie whimpered. A few years ago, Tommy could have just told him that it would be over soon, but at all of eleven years old, Charlie was too smart for that now.

Tommy looked at his watch and found it entirely unforgiving. He longed to get up out of those awful low theater seats, walk out of the building, and take a cab to the White Pony, but he knew it was not to be. He could picture the perfect meal in his mind, could nearly smell it. Simple but good, a fish pie, some beer, and Charlie getting exactly the same...well, not beer. Tommy had started drinking already at that age, but he had a feeling that Grace wouldn’t approve of it, and he found it difficult to argue with his wife now that she was dead.

“Dad.”

“I know. Here, read the program.” Tommy handed over the program in all its pink and black glory. New Birmingham Tenth District Elementary School Aishe Day Performance, it said in overwrought curlicue letters on the front page. Clearly some teacher had repressed years of creative instincts only to unleash them all on a piece of paper whose sole purpose was to list the names of children that everybody already knew were there. “Tell me which families make the biggest showing. Rank them.”

Charlie squinted at it. “Rank them how?”

“Whichever family you think has the most power over the production.”

The dark-haired woman sitting to him shook her head. “Jesus, Tommy.”

Tommy said nothing. It was always only a matter of time before Esme found some fault with his parenting, and he had found that the best way to deal with it was just to ignore her. If he was making a life-threatening mistake she’d escalate to shouting, which is the point at which he’d stop ignoring her. In the meantime he liked to think he got on pretty well.

The game he’d devised had Charlie engaged for a good five minutes. “Is it a trick question?” Charlie finally asked, looking up from the rows of names.

“No.”

“Do you have an answer in your head?”

“Yes,” Tommy lied.

“Hm.” Charlie went back to studying the list of names with such intensity that Tommy regretted making the game up at all. Charlie had what Tommy called his mother’s determination and what Polly called his father’s bloodymindedness. Perhaps Charlie would have a better time if he were more like these other children, easily pleased with a friendly compliment or a rubber ball. But no, his great love was tackling challenges as small as a wooden puzzle and as large as a draft horse, and Tommy found some small measure of comfort in that, in knowing that he wasn’t alone in the restless turnings of his mind. It was selfish, but he liked that he could look at Charlie, with his brown bangs a little too long and his tiny forehead screwed up in thought, and understand the rhythm of how his mind was feeling out the problem.

Some time later—would they never start the fucking show?—Charlie looked up and grinned. “I have it.”

“Go on, then,” said Tommy. He tried not to smile too wide, thought it was a little idiotic to appear that indulgent in public, but fuck he loved the way Charlie’s blue eyes would light up when he smelled victory.

“The Markowitz family has the most children in the show, with thirteen. But only Solly and Miriam can act, so most of them are things like Viridian soldiers, because it doesn’t take any talent to wear green and hold guns and look evil. They don’t have the most power out of the production.”

“All right,” said Tommy, who was already enjoying this immensely.

“We have a decent showing, mostly because Katie got the role of Aishe, but also because Jimmy got to be an evil Viridian politician, and yell about how the Jews and the gypsies are fomenting a culture of crime and blah blah blah in the valley.”

Tommy raised an eyebrow. John Junior, affectionately known as Jimmy, had his father’s smile and his mother’s spirits, and was about as far from a politician as anyone could be, even if you excluded his youth.

“He’s really good. You’ll see. But ultimately, I think the Amiel family has the most power over the production, as you said.”

“Family of prodigies, is it?”

“No. But Mr. Amiel is the principal, so he could cancel the whole show before it’s begun. Power.” Charlie grinned up at him, and Tommy grinned back before he could catch himself.

Esme reached over and hit him on the shoulder. Before he could object, she gestured behind them, to the theater’s main entrance.

Tommy turned, and all his satisfaction melted away. He swore. “He doesn’t even have children.”

“Guess we know why the show’s late,” Esme murmured, as they both watched Alfie Solomons saunter down the central aisle. “Couldn’t start without him.”

“I tried to convince the school board to stop taking his donations, last term.”

“And they laughed in your face?”

“Something like that.”

“Should we be worried?”

“No. Half the City Council’s children are in this fucking play. If he does pull anything, it’ll be nothing short of a coup.”

“Are we quite sure he’s not about to try to overthrow the government?”

“We’re sure there’s nothing we can do to stop him now.”

Charlie darted out of his seat, but Tommy’s reflexes had been perfected long ago, and he collared his son almost without looking.

“No,” Tommy said.

“I wouldn’t even talk to him! I’d just pick his pockets.”

“He’s eaten smaller boys than you for breakfast.”

“Really?”

“No, but don’t go stealing from Alfie Solomons without a grand plan.”

“Simplest plans are the best. It’s when you get complicated that you get fucked.”

“Don’t go quoting Aunt Pol to me.” Tommy plopped his son back down in the little theater chair.

Charlie sighed. “Will the play at least start now?”

“I think so.”

And sure enough, immediately after Alfie had politely evicted someone from the front row and settled himself down, the lights dimmed.

Alfie had made all his rivals stew in their boredom for an extra twenty minutes with some of their kids whining beside them and some of their kids probably pissing themselves from stage fright. Tommy had to hand it to him; even for an international arms dealer, was a whole new level of particularly petty assholery.

Once the curtain lifted, though, Tommy’s annoyance melted away. It was genuinely hilarious to see all the three and four year olds lined up, wobbly and blinking in the stage lights, trying to remember the appropriate words and motions to some song and dance about Death Mountain. Not that the song called it that, of course; to be politically correct, the school had dutifully stuck to the rebrand, and the song, thanking Mount Ilia for making the valley a good place to grow various different crops. Notably, it did not mention that the way that Death Mountain had done that was by exploding in a cloud of volcanic ash and destroying everything in the valley below, including all its previous inhabitants. But maybe that wasn’t age-appropriate.

Somewhere in between the verse about grain and the verse about apples, Oliver, Esme and John’s youngest, got tired of the dancing and decided to sit down. Very neatly, cross-legged, he spent the rest of the song singing heartily, but not even trying to make the right motions with his arms. Occasionally he swiped his curly brown hair out of his eyes with one pudgy little hand, but that was it, despite the silent gesticulating of his young teacher, who was clearly trying to motion him to get up. When the song ended, most of the kids filed out, but Oliver stayed sitting, so the poor woman had to get up on stage and pick Oliver up to make way for the next scene. From far down the Shelby row, Arthur laughed so hard over it he sounded nearly hysterical.

Then came the prime attraction, the Aishe Day reenactment. A rather impressive number of students dressed in green, red, and yellow, and representing armies from Viridian, West Celas, and Erles, milled about on the stage shouting and brandishing some of the most unconvincing gun replicas Tommy had ever seen. Among them was Karl, who as one of the oldest Shelbys, had participated in more Aishe Days than he cared to remember and appeared bored out of his mind. Tommy didn’t blame him; at that age, he had spent most historical reenactments in a similarly sullen state.

Finally, the Viridians “won”, represented by all the red and yellow wearing students dropping dramatically down onto the stage, and a handful of the students wearing green ripped off their green shirts to reveal blue or orange below, apparently representing the Jewish and Romani people that had fled afterwards. Tommy was getting bored again. Last year’s play had had much better production values.

But then came Jimmy, all dressed in green. Even frowning, he still reminded Tommy of a much younger John, especially considering the way he gestured with great enthusiasm as he gave his speech. At first, said speech was standard fare about how the Viridians couldn’t trust New Birmingham and all those Jews and gypsies and their illegal buildings and the way that criminals were fleeing from law abiding countries to blah blah blah, but as he really got into it, Jimmy began to get extemporaneous, and pretty soon he was bellowing improvised political invective with a viciousness, filth, and speed which frankly impressed his uncle very much.

He glanced down at Charlie to see how Charlie was taking this. Far from being disturbed by his cousin’s unexpected aptitude for mimicking one of the most renowned racists of recent history, Charlie appeared completely enthralled by the way that Jimmy was getting away with saying things that otherwise Esme would have washed his mouth out for.

Esme noticed it, too. When Jimmy was finally waved off the stage by a red-faced teacher, she leaned over.

“Hey.” She tapped Charlie on the shoulder. “If you weren’t homeschooled, you could be up there right now. Tell your dad to enroll you next year.”

Tommy didn’t even look away from the stage. “Fuck off, Esme.”

“Bite me, Tommy.”

“Fuck off, Aunt Esme.”

“Oi!” said Tommy.

“Sorry,” Charlie muttered.

Esme raised one eyebrow, but nobody could withstand a solid fifteen seconds of Charlie giving them the puppy eyes. She relented, mussing his hair. “You really are your father’s son.”

“You lot, shut up,” Polly whisper-hissed. “Katie’s on soon.”

That Katie was, and for all the chaos and embarrassment that previous Shelbys had caused the most important school performance of the year, John’s daughter more than made up for it. From the moment she stepped on the stage, all eyes were on her. Despite the truly awful props and set, her determined gray eyes miraculously lifted Aishe’s story out of the ridiculous and into the captivating. Read on a page, her little opening monologue about how worried she was about her family back home in New Birmingham would have come across as trite, but the way she delivered it, it reminded Tommy of his first few nights away from home, trying to fall asleep in the barracks and missing Arthur’s familiar snore.

The beats of the story were familiar to everyone: how Aishe had stolen some of the most important weapons research from under the nose of her employer; how she had brought them to New Birmingham; how, at the age of only twenty-three, she had flown to the top of Mount Ilia, deposited the pulse technology that blanketed the valley in a protective signal-blocking shield, keeping New Birmingham safe from the Viridian threat. With her plane thus disabled, she tried to descend the mountain on foot, and died in the attempt. When the boy who played the radio operator tried to contact her and received no response, Tommy could actually feel his throat tighten up. Fucking hell, an emotion. Who knew that thirteen-year-old Katie could do something to him that getting shot in the arm couldn’t even manage anymore?

When the curtain went down, most of the audience was still stunned, but Arthur, never one for hesitation, immediately began clapping.

“On your feet!” he roared, and there came the standing ovation.

As the applause eventually died down, Tommy felt Charlie tugging at his sleeve. He bent down, a little worried that his son would actually demand to attend school after all. But no.

“Can we eat now, Dad?”

“Yes,” said Tommy, a split second before Principal Amiel took the stage.

Amiel was a rather slight, balding man with the thinnest of wire reading glasses, hardly imposing, but his voice, when he spoke, held a surprising amount of authority, low and grave and measured. “Thank you, everyone, for coming today to share in the celebration of our city and its history.”

A few parents began to sneak out the back door, evidently wishing to skip the patriotic speech and get their children.

In response, Amiel raised his voice, just a little. “I would especially like to thank our guest, Mr. Solomons, for supporting our school in so many ways.”

Jesus Christ. Tommy could hear Esme make a noise of disgust, and for once, the two of them were in agreement. Amiel had always been a brown noser, but this time he was so far up Alfie’s ass that he must have been bumping into Alfie’s fucking liver with his forehead.

“This year, he has blessed our school not only with his general support, but also with scholarships for a number of students, some based on need and some on particular gifts. Tonight, we would like to highlight one of these students by inviting the winner of the Alfie Solomons Patriotism In Writing Essay Contest to read their piece. Miriam, will you please come to the stage.”

A girl of about fifteen, with two long braids, walked slowly down the center aisle, blushing furiously. There were multiple papers clutched in her hand. Multiple sheets of paper.

Tommy was going to kill him. That was simply what he was going to have to do.

“Dad,” said Charlie. “Food.”

“I know,” Tommy said grimly. “I know.”

When the girl began to read what was essentially a policy paper, Tommy’s eyes just about rolled into the back of his head. There was no originality to it; it was just the common argument for sending the army to remove the pulse technology from the top of Death Mountain. Blah blah blah, wireless technology was the future, blah blah blah, falling behind other countries, blah blah blah, an economic necessity, blah blah blah blah blah blah blah. Couldn’t Alfie have picked something entertaining, at least? Though, from the Cheshire grin he wore, he clearly was entertained well enough.

The speech dragged on, and Tommy imagined Arthur in his less-than-sober days, who would probably have leapt up and started shouting only two sentences into this speech. If we get rid of the pulse, every other country can fly over us and bomb us into fucking rubble, he’d say. Probably wave his arms a little too. Maybe point. Arthur did love pointing at people for emphasis. But of course you don’t care about that, do you, Mr. Solomons? You don’t give a shit about soldiers like me, hell, you’d love a fucking war, arms dealer like you. Make a fortune out of it! You fucker. Spittle flying, more likely than not.

Tommy amused himself with wondering who would win in a fight. Alfie had a weight advantage, but he had the bum leg. Same height, and they were both, to put it delicately, mental. He decided that if he were laying odds, he’d make them damn near 50/50, probably favoring Alfie. Alfie had the edge of quicker thinking, not to mention a clearly sadistic streak, if this endless speech was anything to go by.

Far down the row, there was a stirring, and he looked over. A boy with the recognizable gray cap of a mail runner had passed Polly a letter. WAs this some new policy he’d not been informed of? He’d heard of immediate deliveries to people’s houses at nighttime, but this was something else. Polly’s face as she read the letter made his stomach drop. There was a moment of pure dismay, and then the mask slid into place. They were in public, and he could not reach over, grab her, and ask, but in his head he went through all the people that could be dead. It wasn’t a child, wouldn’t be, not with that reaction. Uncle Charlie, maybe? Johnny Dogs?

Polly handed the letter down to Esme, then got up and started to leave the theater, just as Principal Amiel suddenly interrupted the girl on stage.

“I apologize,” he said, “but there is something important I feel we must speak about. Please have a seat, Miriam.” There was a faint tremor in his voice, though he spoke far more quickly than he usually did. The girl gladly fled the stage. Amiel gripped the microphone tighter.

“On this day, of all days,” he said, “We must think on the nature of our city.”

Esme was reading the letter now and she was worse than Polly at keeping a stone face; the fear was there. Up in the front row, Alfie was reading a letter too. Tommy hadn’t seen who passed it to him, but fuck. Fuck.

“Less than seventy years old,” Amiel went on, “In the shadow of Mount Ilia, poorer than the surrounding countries, created by all the people not wanted elsewhere. And yet we are not fragile. New Birmingham will remain for generations to come for the same reason that it has survived thus far: because we are a people familiar with sacrifice.”

Tommy could taste the bitterness of adrenaline, and he hadn’t even seen a fucking gun yet.

“Because, when the moment comes, we can work as one to save ourselves. Because Aishe alone could not have done it without the thousands of troops, some veterans and some conscripts, who fought on the ground even as the pulse shielded the sky. Because we fight together.”

Esme had tangled one hand in John’s hair, John had no idea what was happening, but they were kissing passionately and Tommy couldn’t stand it anymore. He snatched the letter out of her hand.

“If we can keep our heads,” Amiel said urgently, “if we can think in a crisis, if we—”

The sirens went off. The theater erupted.

“KEEP YOUR FUCKING HEADS.” That was Alfie, roaring into the microphone. He had bounded up onto the stage and snatched it from Amiel’s hands. “Stay fucking seated. You’re not children. We’ve been drilled on this. Half of you are in the fucking army, so try and fucking act like it.”

The crowd settled somewhat, such was the power of the man’s voice.

“Troop transport should be here shortly, and we’ll all get our marching orders then. For now, stay in your fucking seats. The last thing we need is some kid trampled.”

Kids, Jesus. Tommy crouched down and put a hand on Charlie’s shoulder. “Are you all right?”

Charlie met him with an intolerably familiar look. He had his mother’s green eyes, and they were now looking at Tommy with pride trying to cover up the fear. “Are we gonna die, Dad?” he said. “I can take it if we are. I just want to know.”

“No. No, you’re going to be fine.”

“That wasn’t what I asked.” And God he was his mother’s son, he truly was, all the more because looking at him, Tommy couldn’t bear to lie, not like this.

“I love you, all right?” His son’s eyes had begun to fill with tears. “Look at me. Charlie, I—”

“Orders from the Commander: all soldiers in transport, special troops included, guard reserves included.” Tommy looked up. Alfie had another letter in his hand, was reading it out. “Transport is out front, doesn’t matter which company you’re in, we’ll all get sorted at the base.” There was a sudden surge of movement in the school theater seats. “Oi!” Alfie bellowed. “I want to see some orderly fucking exits.”

All around them was a press of bodies, motion, a thousand voices. Tommy had to raise his voice to be heard.

“I have to go. Be good for Linda and Arthur, all right?”

Charlie grabbed his sleeve. “Dad, wait.”

“I have to go. Come on, here.” There was nothing else he could do; he lifted Charlie wholesale and handed him over to Arthur.

“I’ve got him, don’t worry,” Arthur said gruffly. “Kill a couple of em for me, will you?”

Tommy tore himself away, tried and failed to ignore Charlie yelling “Dad!” after him.

He pushed his way into the aisle, which had swelled with dozens, maybe hundreds of other people, other soldiers, and fuck it was strange to think of them that way when some of them were still in stiff ties or high heels but they were and this was it. Polly he couldn’t see in the crowd, but John and Esme were just ahead of him, holding hands, John not paying any attention to where he was going, but letting her steer him as he leaned over and half-shouted into her ear. The expression on John’s face cut through the panic enough to make Tommy’s chest ache. Esme was in their one and only armored tank division, would be first on the front line. John was in the infantry.

Outside the school was pure chaos. A few dark cars with their own sirens blaring sped away, likely taking city councilmen, dignitaries, advisors, maybe even Polly to meet with the mayor, but on the whole it was massive, monstrous dark troop transport units, and people piling into them like sardines into a can. In the shuffle, John lost sight of Tommy and Esme. Not that it would matter, he tried to tell himself. If it was to be a fucking war, they’d all get split. None of them were in the same division, and yet—

The flow of people took him into one of the transport units, and he fumbled with the letter in his hand. It was hard to read in the press of people all around him, but the message on it was simple.

CLASSIFIED

To: City Council, Commander’s Advisors, Division Leaders

From: City Commander, Mayor

Mount Ilia, Code Orange. Eruption expected in fifteen (15) days. Capitol ASAP.

“Oi!” a familiar voice said.

Tommy looked up into the bearded face of Alfie Solomons.

“Where’d you get that?” He was peering down at the paper, and before Tommy could react, had snatched it away and was tearing it to pieces.

Tommy let it go. Better that then have another soldier read it and panic.

“Fucking hell, you Shelbys you do share and share alike, don’t you. Classified materials and all.”

The door closed behind them, and in the ensuing darkness, Tommy could feel the unit begin to move, the press of bodies round him the only thing keeping him up.

“You’re reserves, is it, Alfie?”

“Fuck no. Army. Where’d you think I got the fucking limp from?”

In the hubbub of voices, Tommy felt sure he could still hear Charlie calling after him. He closed his eyes, tried to focus. “Army? Impossible.”

“Better believe it, mate.”

“If you were in the Army, you’d never let the lot of us hear the end of your great fucking sacrifices.”

This would set off Arthur’s PTSD, Tommy was fucking sure of it. Linda would have that handled, maybe, but then there was Charlie for her to take care of and all of John and Esme’s kids, not to mention Linda and Arthur’s own and none of their houses had enough beds for that and—

Alfie’s voice was right in his ear, murmuring something. Something about war, and often, and don’t.

Tommy shivered. Even if Linda did manage to sort all those things out, the best would be to get the children out and soon. Did Polly still have contacts with Erlesian smugglers? She had to, the last deal had been less than two years ago. But then Polly was likely in the Capitol now and lost to everything but strategy. There was no way Linda had the connections to smuggle that many children across the border. And Ada, where was Ada when the sirens went off? Was Karl’s school doing an Aishe Day celebration then, or had they maybe done it in the morning, and if they had, where was Freddie—

“Oi.” That was Alfie, much louder now. The unit hit a bump in the road, jolted, and his beard scraped at Tommy’s cheek.

Tommy flinched away. “What?”

“You didn’t hear a word I said, did you. What are you?”

“I’m fine,” Tommy said through his teeth.

“No, what’s your rank?”

“Sergeant Major.”

“Then I outrank you.”

“Congratulations,” Tommy snarled.

“Pull it together, Shelby. That’s an order from a superior officer. Look at me.” Tommy did, but in the darkness, there wasn’t much to see. Suddenly, one big hand grabbed him by the collar, pulled him in. “We’re going to need every last soldier. Last I checked, you were a soldier. Yeah? So pull it the fuck together.” Alfie released him with a pat to the shoulder, or maybe it was a slap.

“Yeah,” Tommy got out. He hated that it was coming from Alfie, but the man was right, of course he was. He’d done this before. Breathing, that was the key. Breathing, and thinking through the parts of a handgun. Simple, methodical. How he would clean it. How he would take it apart, and put it back together. Metal only, no people. Metal only…

Eventually, his stomach settled. He felt he had to prove that it had. “Alfie, about that scholarship speech.”

“You liked that? I wrote it myself.”

“I hope, from the bottom of my fucking heart, that you die slow.”

Alfie laughed. He seemed to shrink from Alfie Solomons down to a man when he laughed. It was the way he laughed, too loud and too big and too long. Too too much. Maybe Tommy wasn’t the only one in the conversation who had to count out his breathing.

“You too, Shelby,” Alfie said. “You too.”

.

.

.

the other chapters: on tumblr • on ao3

lmk if you want to be added to the tag list or removed from it:

@twistedrunes, @transtommyshelby, @pure-bastard-extract, @whentommymetalfie, @darkandstormyslash, @toyhto, @birminghamblinders, @clearblue99, @mafaldaz

[aion-rsa]

Vigil Episode 3 Review: For Bros In Peril On the Sea!

https://ift.tt/3n6thLy

This Vigil review contains spoilers.

Well, that got complicated fast. After two action-heavy instalments bracketed by exhilarating ‘Brace! Brace! Brace!’ emergencies, episode three switched gears for some old-fashioned gumshoeing that left us with a truckload of information and new characters. If anyone felt like requesting a paracetamol from the medical officer after that one, you’re not alone. Best check it for tampering first though, eh? Wouldn’t want to end up like Burke – in a body bag, being slid in and out of a torpedo tube every two minutes like a human swanee whistle.

Silva was right; Burke was poisoned. And the chief suspect for his murder is currently… Chief Petty Officer Glover, aka the Coxswain with the dragon tattoo. Experienced crime drama viewers knew that Shaun Evans’ character was entirely too inoffensive and omnipresent not to be suss. He’s lurked fuzzily in the background of every scene since the start, proffering cups of tea, kind words and jokes about Ryanair, when all along he’s been up to his neck in this whole conspiracy. Probably. 

What, exactly, is the conspiracy? This info-heavy episode filled in a lot of the blanks. HMS Vigil’s bad boy reputation came from a missile servicing visit to Florida 18 months earlier. You know how it is on shore leave. Everybody has a few drinks, things get a bit lairy, you let off some steam… Except in this instance, the steam was let off a malfunctioning nuclear reactor cooling system minutes away from a meltdown to rival Fukushima, and it cooked two men alive. The Navy covered it up by dumping their bodies in the sea, but Burke knew the truth and was preparing to blow the whistle.

That’s one theory. Another is that Glover saw Burke off because he was blackmailing the Coxswain over his affair with the crew’s medical officer. On that thumb drive was an incriminating sexy photo of Doc Docherty that Burke had stolen from the married-with-kids CPO’s phone. That’s right, after all the fuss Glover made about not setting foot in the women’s bunk room, it turns out he’s no stranger to entering illicit places, including Lt. Tiffany Doherty. She was the one who sourced the wee to fake the tests to clear the names of the pisshead crew (that Jack built). But was she pressured into it and if so, by whom?

Read more

TV

Vigil Episode 2 Review: Deeper into the Conspira-Sea!

By Louisa Mellor

TV

Vigil Episode 1 Review: A Top Twist On the Trid-ent Tested Murder Mystery

By Louisa Mellor

That’s the question both Silva and her onshore counterpart Longacre were asking this episode. Their investigation is taking place in stereo, once on land and once again at sea. The two detectives are chasing the same information via different leads, and usually reaching a simultaneous shared conclusion thanks to a series of cutesy lovers’ riddles. It’s a plot necessity, of course, and on paper, probably felt like an innovative genre twist. As a viewer though, it feels not unlike having the same radio station playing slightly out of sync in different rooms of the house, which may explain the need for paracetamol.

Episode three introduced us to several new players. With the addition of two MI5 agents and local electioneering politician Patrick Cruden, there are now four major powers in play and at each other’s throats: the Navy, Police Scotland, the British intelligence service, and Holyrood. Five, if you count the Dunloch peace camp. Six, if you count the US Navy, who should probably come first if we’re ranking by firepower. The Russians aren’t involved as far as we know, because that secret shadowing boat turned out to belong to the Americans, but give them time. The US boat’s gone now, but was likely there as a result of the hushed-up scandal at Port Havers. 

It’s a lot to keep in mind at once, with the sheer volume of new revelations (the Florida deaths, the Coxswain’s dirty business, Jade being the secret lovechild of the anti-Trident Scottish MP…). Add to that DCI Silva’s personal tragedy, which is causing her to go wibble roughly every fifteen minutes, and Vigil has its plate full. I don’t blame Silva. I’d go wibble too if I’d packed three days’ worth of knickers for what turns out to be a three-week stay. More pressing is her soon-to-be lack of anti-depressants, which doesn’t bode well for anybody hoping her mood would improve.

Though reasonable considering the pressure she’s under (both hydrostatic and otherwise), Silva’s brusqueness is starting to feel a little repetitive to watch. If she had an ally in the boat, perhaps Suranne Jones could show another side to the character apart from the one that marches around making demands and, like a Big Brother contestant, saying that she didn’t come here to make friends. With Glover on the suspect list, there’s now nobody to reveal that different facet – only the misery flashbacks to step-daughter Poppy being torn from her arms. After talking Gary Walsh (Daniel Portman) down from his suicide threat, perhaps there’s kinship to build there? 

If the first two episodes made you feel like you were on a ride at Alton Towers, this one was more akin to doing a hard Sudoku, with lots of potential scenarios to keep in mind at once and plenty of notes scribbled around the margins. Who leaked Burke’s death to the press? Who spiked Burke with LSD? Who made Doherty cheat the drug tests? Is Longacre’s nice boss (Gary Lewis) to be trusted? And weren’t they all singing that hymn a wee bit loud for a top secret silent running submarine? Until next week. Dismissed!

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Vigil continues next Sunday the 12th of September at 9pm on BBC One.

The post Vigil Episode 3 Review: For Bros In Peril On the Sea! appeared first on Den of Geek.

from Den of Geek https://ift.tt/3kZw2vw

[themattress]

Pokeani: The Evolution of the Heroine

In the beginning, we had Misty. In the original Kanto Saga, she was co-Gym Leader of Ceruelan Gym alongside her three older sisters, but left home to become a better Pokemon trainer. She had a very spunky, fiery, bold and irrepressible personality, feeling both over-the-top and cartoony to fit the tone of the show yet also very human. She was a three-dimensional character who viewers came to know and love, and to this day, many miss her.

But with that said, Misty had three problems with her portrayal.

1. One of the most relatable things about Misty - her family issues with her sisters - was also one of the weakest since it was barely ever focused on beyond being the motivator to get Misty started on her journey. We don’t see much of her sisters beyond two episodes, we don’t hear much about them beyond Misty’s petty younger sibling jealousy toward them and their petty older sibling mistreatment of her, and the nature of how they came to be Gym Leaders and what happened to their parents, which should be a big part of this conflict, is never elaborated on.  Misty was hardly alone on this - Takeshi Shudo said on his blog that he wasn’t allowed to go into depth with the three main characters’ backgrounds and how they affected them. It’s surprising that he was even able to get away with having it said in the show that Brock’s parents were deadbeats, although this also hurts Misty since it comes up right before the conflict with her sisters does, which now looks especially weak by comparison.

2. Misty could have a bad attitude and the show didn’t hold back in showing her character flaws. Again, this was a strength for the character, as it just made her that much more human and realistic. The problem came when the show didn’t always properly address these flaws in the way it should have. Nowhere is this more apparent than it is in her dynamic with Psyduck. She hurls both verbal and physical abuse at the poor dumb Pokemon constantly, and unlike Ash, Psyduck can’t actually respond in kind.  The show ignoring that she could just store it at Professor Oak’s laboratory, or even just release it if she’s that aggravated by it, only serves to make her look much worse than I think they were intending to make her look. It’s very telling that her relationship with Psyduck is now shown as a loving one in her recent two-part return guest appearance - years later, the show’s writers finally realized that this was a problem.

3. This is the big one: after the Kanto saga, Misty’s development path just...stopped. She still had three and a half years left on the show as a main character, yet the writers had no solid direction left to take her in. Suede brilliantly sums it up in this video, although he’s a little off in saying that getting Togepi was the peak of her development - “The Misty Mermaid” was actually the peak, since it finally had her sisters giving her the acknowledgement she always wanted. After this, there was no reason for Misty to stay around for the Orange Islands and Johto, yet she did and became a boring shell of her former self, always just sitting around holding Togepi. I’m baffled as to why people were so upset when Misty finally left at the end of the Original Series - it was long overdue, and Brock should have stayed gone with her.

So yeah, at the start Misty may have had the most vibrant personality out of any of the Pokeani’s heroines, but by the end she had one of the weaker development courses. 

Enter May in Advanced Generation (Pokemon the Series: Ruby and Sapphire). Her personality may have been a tad more trope-y than Misty’s (it’s basically a typical Shojo heroine personality to balance with Ash’s typical Shonen hero personality), but it was also engaging and interesting in a way Misty’s had not been in years - being both as spunky, bold and passionate as Misty was in her prime while also being very insecure and vulnerable. 

More notably, May’s development path was excellent. She starts off not particularly liking Pokemon, making her feel like the black sheep of her Pokemon-oriented family, and only uses a Pokemon journey as an excuse to fulfill her true goal of seeing the world. But after getting into contests and becoming a Pokemon Coordinator, May develops a genuine passion for Pokemon.  Her self-confidence and her self-doubt ebbs and flows at realistic moments, and through her career as a Coordinator she starts to tackle tougher personal issues such as the reason she came to dislike Pokemon in the first place, and even a budding romance with her main rival Drew. She began the series as a newbie whom Ash had to mentor, but in the series finale she goes toe-to-toe with Ash in battle (which ends in a draw), all while exuding a much more mature demeanor when compared to how she was like at the beginning. She still stands tall as one of the most dynamic characters in the whole Pokemon anime franchise.

Next came Dawn in Diamond/Pearl (Pokemon the Series: Diamond and Pearl), who can best be described as May-Lite, or Diet May. Like May, she also seeks a path as a Pokemon Coordinator, although in her case she wants it from the start since her mother was a famous Coordinator. She takes the typical Shojo heroine personality that May had up to eleven, being more cheerful and self-confident while insecure and self-doubting at the same time, more ditzy, more girly, more fashionable, and more prone to fanservice moments.  But sadly, her development path was nowhere near as successful as May’s was, and for two big reasons. 

The first is that her character arc peaks before her story arc does. Her story arc peaks at the Grand Festival in episode 177, and concludes along with the series in episode 191. But her character arc, centered around the self-doubt and depression she develops as a result of not being as skilled a Coordinator as she thought she’d be due to her lineage, wraps up in episode 79, with 112 episodes still left to go. That’s not as bad as Misty, but still pretty bad.

Second, and worse, is that Dawn is a static character. Her bout with self-doubt and depression comes and goes, as if it was only there to give her a character arc in a perfunctory way, and Dawn is left exactly the same as she started the series. In fact, we get flashbacks to Dawn’s early childhood, and she’s the same even then: just as nice and perky, with the same “No need to worry!” catchphrase. There is not the same sense of newfound maturity about her at the end of the show like there was with May and even Misty, she never changes her appearance in any way like Misty, May, Serena and Lillie do, and when she returns for a while in the next series, her Pokemon team has not changed in any way either, setting her apart from Misty, May and Iris in a negative way. Her post-series special episode doesn’t even do anything important or interesting with her, when even Brock’s did for him! Yeah, she grows into a stronger Coordinator. Doesn’t make her a stronger character.

In Best Wishes (Pokemon the Series: Black and White), the new heroine is Iris. Iris can be best described as like Misty with a less engaging personality but a much better development path. Like Misty, the anime version of Iris is in a place prior to her position in the games, and we get to see her grow into that position. Like Misty, she leaves home to become a better trainer, specifically of a certain Pokemon type (Dragon-types, in this case). Like Misty, she has many character flaws such as a hypocritical pseudo-maturity front, a quick temper, and being snide and argumentative toward Ash. Like Misty, her character arc peaks at a point before the League tournament.  And like Misty, she even has a phobia of a certain Pokemon type (Ice-types, in this case). These are the similarities, now let’s look at the differences.

With Iris, we end up getting a very clear backstory that very clearly informs and explains her present-day motivations and character flaws. We get a defined term for what it means to be a “Dragon Master” - not someone with a lot of Dragon-types or even the strongest Dragon-types, but someone who has the best empathetic bonds with Dragon-types, whether it be their own, other trainers’, or wild ones, and this is something Iris makes visible progress in throughout the series. Her flaws are called attention to and she develops past them, losing her pseudo-maturity and gaining real maturity that includes accepting that she’s still a child who enjoys doing childish things, and her “What a kid!” verbal ribbing of Ash becomes more affectionate than mean and eventually all but disappears altogether, she still gets some interesting footnotes to her character arc after it peaks, and she even manages to overcome her irrational phobia of Ice-types. And she also has a rival who helps her develop, and she gets to participate in several tournaments (even winning one!), and the dysfunctional relationships she has with certain Pokemon of her’s (Excadrill and Dragonite) are ones that change for the better, with both her and them being able to come to an understanding. 

Iris’ development path comes second only to May, which is because the change in her character isn’t quite as obvious and pronounced, and her character arc isn’t really sustained throughout the entirety of the series like May’s was. She’s still a top-tier heroine, and it’s a shame that so many misogynistic fans fail to appreciate this because they’re too busy crying about how she calls their beloved self-projection character Ash a kid and undermines all his “growth”. And this immature fan reaction is probably a big part of what led to XY’s Serena.

Let’s just get it out of the way - Serena’s the worst heroine the franchise has ever given us.  Her character is Dawn taken up to eleven just as Dawn’s was May taken up to eleven, her story arc is lame since being a Pokemon Performer and participating in showcases is a blatantly watered-down version of what May and Dawn already did, and most importantly, her character arc is atrocious to the point of being offensive.  She starts as a girl who is obsessively in love with Ash because of one random childhood incident that Ash doesn’t remember, joins his traveling group without a clearly defined goal and is clearly only in it to get into Ash’s pants, and when she finds her goal, it’s still largely motivated by the desire to appeal to Ash and get him to return her affections that he remains expectedly oblivious to. 

You would expect her to eventually develop a true passion for showcases like May did for contests, and realize that Ash is a lost cause romantically and just stay his friend.  But nope!  In the end, she rejects the offer to be tutored by a professional Performer and outright quits showcases altogether, suddenly deciding that now she wants to be a Coordinator and do contests in Hoenn!  And in case there was any doubt as to what motivated this turn, her last scene has her telling Ash that she will “become a more attractive girl” in doing this, and that “you are my goal”.  It’s all for the sake of getting Ash’s attention, just as it always was. 

Beyond the obviously sexist tone of this - Serena’s whole character arc revolving around getting a guy to fall in love with her - the worst part is that Serena doesn’t even love Ash.  She loves an idea of Ash, a fantasy in her head, an idealized version of Ash she conjured up based on one random incident in her childhood that clearly meant nothing to Ash even if it somehow meant the world to her. In a telling moment, when Ash actually begins to express self-doubt and feel down, does Serena comfort him?  Nope, she throws snowballs at him because he’s breaking her flawless mental image of him and she wants “the real Ash” back!  This is never called out, and she’s framed as in the right, with Ash even thanking her for it!

The nail in the coffin would be her trainer record - she only gets three Pokemon, and gets the dubious honor of being the only heroine to never lose a battle solely because she barely ever battles, and the opponents she’s given are the absolute weakest possible, like her loser rivals or the inept Team Rocket. So yeah, the Pokeani fans can keep their waifu. She sucks, hard.

Now in Sun and Moon (Pokemon the Series: Sun and Moon), we have Lillie. Yes, Mallow and Lana are also regular female characters, but it’s very obvious that, like the source material games, Lillie is the lead heroine for this series. And like the games, she’s one of the best-developed characters in the franchise. Not only is her personality very fleshed out and lovable, and as relatably human as Misty in the Kanto saga, but her character arc, centered around a past trauma leaving her unable to touch Pokemon even though she loves them, has been done exceptionally well, just recently coming to its touching conclusion. And the best part is that this doesn’t mean Lillie is anywhere remotely close to finished, since she’s about to reinvent herself just like in the games, and be set for a new character arc focused on growing stronger as a person and a trainer. She’s up there with Iris, and is closing in on May! She may end up as the Pokeani’s greatest heroine, following up from the worst, which is helped by actually having a female head writer in charge for once. So here’s to you, Lillie!

[fandomsandfeminism]

JRR Tolkien, master of modern fantasy, held a deep, undying dislike for the Bard of England. Let's talk about why and how it impacted his writing.

Transcript: 

Alright, listen friends. I am not a complicated person with complicated hobbies. If you asked someone to name 3 things I like, they would be totally in  the right to list “Anime, Shakespeare, and Lord of the Rings.” So today we are going to talk about the intersection of two of these excellent things.

No… not Anime Romeo and Juliet…..though….I mean, it is a good show...t fixes some of my complaints about the original….maybe next time.

No, no, today we are going to talk about how JRR Tolkien absolutely freakin hated Shakespeare and that’s why Eowyn is a badass.

So, let’s start by talking about Tolkien. John Ronald Ruel Tolkien was born on January 3rd, 1892. The Hobbit was written in 1937, after he had served in world war 1, when Tolkien was 45. The Lord of the Rings was written in stages, the last book being released in 1949, when he was 57. So for most of his life, Tolkien was not “the guy who wrote Lord of the Rings.” Instead, for most of his adult life, Tolkien’s claim to fame was his research, translation, and annotation of Beowulf. (Yes, the Beowulf that your well meaning 12th grade English teacher will force you to read.)

You see, Tolkien was a professor of English and Literature at Oxford. Fun fact, he also worked on the Webster dictionary (specifically on words that began with W with a germanic origin. Dictionary writing is apparently very specialized.) He gave lectures and did research on ancient English literature and language as his specialty.

And let me make something clear. As a person who is academically trained in English literature, this ensures 2 things are true about Tolkien: 1. He was a huge nerd. And 2. He had Opinions.

-

And Tolkien hated Shakespeare. Hated him. You see, Tolkien believed that too much time was spent in English Literature departments reading and studying Shakespeare. But before you leap to agree with him, know this: It was his opinion that a well rounded student of literature should spend little to no time reading ANYTHING more modern than Chaucer. Yeah, the Canterbury Tales, Chaucer. That’s right kids, anything more modern than 1478 was hip modern dribble unworthy of serious study. (Can you imagine what Tolkien would think of modern lit classes these days? Ha.)

But more than that, Tolkien believed that fantasy inherently could not be adequately represented on stage, and that any attempt to do so was fundamentally flawed. (This is where I point out that there are several stage adaptations of Lord of the Rings, including a musical version, all of which are pretty bad and all of which Tolkien would have hated)

He also took objection to Shakespeare drawing on Greek and Anglo-Saxon inspiration for his fairies and elves, rather than what Tolkien saw as a more refined and authentic source: Norse and Celtic traditions.

Tolkien looked at Shakespeare's elves and fairies in A Midsummer Night’s Dream and felt that these corrupt, diminutive depictions of elves were horrible. They weren’t REAL elves. They didn’t act the way REAL elves should act! Like I said, the man had Opinions. Strong opinions about...elves.

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And that brings us to Macbeth. Set aside Tolkien for a moment while we go into some backstory about The Scottish Play.

Macbeth is arguably Shakespeare’s bloodiest tragedy. First performed in 1606 (Well after our Tolkien approved literary cut off of the 1470s) it follows the story of a well respected general Macbeth. One day on the road he comes across a trio of witches who give him a prophecy. Invoking the greek tradition of the 3 fates and greek prophesy, this premonition is destined to be true. They tell Macbeth that he will be king.

Macbeth relays this information to his wife, Lady Macbeth who...basically bullies him into regicide and murder so he can, in fact, become King. She tells him that she’s more of a man than he is because he’s pussyfooting around multiple premeditated murders of friends and allies.

She eventually kills herself out of regret and guilt. Oops. In the midst of all this killing and mayhem, Macbeth seeks out the witches again and asks them for more prophecy. Will he remain king? Will he be deposed, as he deposed the last king?

First, they tell him to beware his rival Macduff. Second, they tell him that no man born of a woman will kill him. Third, they tell him he will be safe until the great Birnam Wood comes to the castle. He feels pretty safe, since two of these three seem pretty impossible. All men are born of women and forests don’t generally go walking around.

In the end, just as with all prophecy, these things come true. Kind of. Macduff reveals that he was born via C-section, which, apparently counts as “not being born from a woman.” And a whole bunch of soldiers use branches of the Birnam forest to disguise themselves as they march on the castle. Macbeth is killed, and thus this tragedy of lust for power and greed has its tragic end.

-

Now, despite your English Teacher’s most persuasive arguments, your future does not ultimately hinge on your ability to read and appreciate Macbeth. It will help you understand all the allusions in Hocus Pocus, and will probably strengthen your, ya know, general reading comprehension and cultural awareness, but ya know, you won’t die without it.

And Tolkien hated Macbeth. Specifically, he really took issue with, what he felt, was a cop out with the final 2 prophecies. He felt that the loopholes about c-section and camouflage cheated the audience, and he was not having it.

So. Lord of the Rings. Tolkien’s excuse to write entire languages and genealogical histories with a loose thread of plot to move from one intense exploration of some odd bit of lore to another. Along with satisfying his need to write a new mythology for England and be the world’s biggest linguistics nerd, Tolkien was also able to address and ultimately fix what he saw as these flaws in Macbeth.

The first is the prophecy about Birnam forest marching on the castle. Rather than have the ~bullshit~ loophole about normal everyday soldiers using branches as camouflage, Tolkien looked that plot point in the eye and declared ENTS. Living, walking, actual tree people. Screw Shakespeare and the limitations of the stage. He could actually have a forest rise up and march on a fortress if he damn well wanted to. And so he did. The ents attack Sarumon's tower in stunning fashion. The man inside the castle, corrupted by a lust for power, is defeated.

The next, and ultimately coolest, is Eowyn. Specifically Eowyn’s duel with the Witch King. Take a minute and picture that scene in Return of the King. The Witch King stands over Eowyn on the battlefield, all confidence and radiating evil, and he declares “No man can kill me!”

The Witch King is, also, Macbeth- a human king driven to acts of evil by his lust for power. In Macbeth the “no man born of a woman can kill me” is solved by...c-section apparently not counting as being born? Tolkien looked that plot point dead in the face and threw Eowyn at it. SHE is no man. She, a woman, breaks that prophecy is a much more satisfying and less bullshitty way.

-

So yes. That’s how Tolkien wrote one of the greatest scenes in modern fantasy just to pick a fight with William Shakespeare. Bonus fact, years later CS Lewis would similarly pick a fight with Tolkien because Tolkien had said that electric lamps had no place in fantasy. CS Lewis responded by putting a damn lamppost in the middle of Narnia just to mess with him.

In summary: Authors are petty and I love them.

So yeah. Thank you for watching this video! This channel is still really new, so I always appreciate comments and likes. I’ll be sure to see yall down in the comments. And as always, if you enjoyed listening to this queer millennial feminist with a BA in English, feel free to subscribe.

[auburnfamilynews]

Jay Biggerstaff-USA TODAY Sports

Take a look at my preseason thoughts on the league and how Auburn’s SEC schedule looks for the upcoming season.

Happy GAMEDAY everyone! Now that we’ve gone through the rosters, the non-conference schedule and other basketball nuggets, it’s time to look at the SEC Schedule and offer some predictions for this year. I can’t wait to look back on these predictions in March and see how wrong I was about this season. I went game by game picking all the games and this is how I “think” it will turn out this season. I’ve listed everyone’s KenPom rankings as well and Auburn will begin at #22 in the KenPom rankings.

Florida 15-3

Kentucky 15-3

LSU 13-5

Auburn 12-6

Tennessee 10-8

Mississippi State 10-8

Alabama 9-9

Missouri 9-9

Arkansas 8-10

Ole Miss 8-10

Georgia 7-11

Texas A&M 4-14

South Carolina 3-15

Vanderbilt 3-15

Saturday January 4th

3:30PM, SEC Network

at Mississippi State Bulldogs

Last Year’s Record: 23-11 (10-8)

KenPom Ranking: 53

Preseason Media Prediction: 7th

My Projection: 6th

Leading Returning Scorers: Tyson Carter (10.4 PPG), Reggie Perry (9.7 PPG), Nick Weatherspoon (9.6 PPG)

The Bulldogs lost their top 2 scorers in Quinndary Weatherspoon and Lamar Peters and will play without Nick Weatherspoon for the first 10 games of the season. This is now Reggie Perry’s team as he was named Preseason 1st Team All-SEC a few weeks ago. They have great size at every position on the floor and in the game in Starkville last season, they took advantage of it. This will be a good challenge for Auburn getting out of the gate in SEC play.

Wednesday January 8th

8PM, SEC Network

Vanderbilt Commodores

Last Year’s Record: 9-23 (0-18)

KenPom Ranking: 148

Preseason Media Prediction: 14th

My Projection: 14th

Leading Returning Scorers: Saben Lee (12.7 PPG), Aaron Nesmith (11 PPG)

It’s a whole new era on the West End of Nashville. Jerry Stackhouse will make his SEC Coaching Debut in the Jungle. There’s nowhere to go but up for the Commodores after the team posted the first winless season by a team in the SEC in over 60 years. Darius Garland played just 5 games before an injury sidelined him and he went on to become the 5th pick in the NBA Draft. The Dores never recovered from losing their starting PG last year.

I think you'll see improvement from Vandy this year as the team had a solid recruiting class including the son of NBA Hall of Famer Scottie Pippen, Scotty Pippen Jr. Nesmith was named to the 2nd Team All-SEC squad.

Saturday January 11th

5PM ESPN/ESPN2

Georgia Bulldogs

Last Year’s Record: 11-21 (2-16)

KenPom Ranking: 55

Preseason Media Prediction: 9th

My Projection: 11th

Leading Returning Scorers: Rayshaun Hammonds (12.1 PPG), Tyree Crump (9.1 PPG), Jordan Harris (7.8 PPG)

Nicolas Claxton went to the NBA or else I think this team would be a Top 4 or 5 preseason pick. The player to watch for Georgia though is Anthony Edwards, and this will be your only chance to see him play in Auburn. Ranked #3 in Rivals Top 150, Edwards, an Atlanta native, elected to stay home for at least a year as he looks likely to jump to the NBA after the season. Fellow freshmen Sahvir Wheeler and Jaywkon Walton also look to make a big impact in their 1st year in Athens. Tom Crean’s squad looks likely to take a step forward after a 13th place finish in the league last season.

Wednesday January 15th

8PM, ESPN2/ESPNU

at Alabama Crimson Tide

Last Year’s Record: 18-16 (8-10)

KenPom Ranking: 70

Preseason Media Prediction: 6th

My Projection: 7th

Leading Returning Scorers: Kira Lewis Jr. (13.5 PPG), John Petty (10.2 PPG), Herb Jones (6.4 PPG)

Whether you want to believe it or not, Alabama made an outstanding hire getting Nate Oats from Buffalo. Oats has won everywhere he’s gone and quite frankly, the recruiting battles between Oats and Bruce Pearl will be ones to watch. The biggest wins for Oats was convincing Kira Lewis, John Petty and others to remain in Tuscaloosa. In addition to Lewis at the point, they added James “Beetle” Bolden, a grad transfer from West Virginia to the backcourt who has shot 40% from 3-point range in his career.

Last year, Auburn swept Alabama. The 2nd loss was a crippling blow to the Tide’s NCAA Tournament hopes. I’ve seen Alabama predicted to finish higher than Auburn by several people and this team, on paper, looks like a NCAA Tournament team. It’s gonna be difficult to sweep Alabama this year but at this point, we’ll have a good idea of where each team stands.

Saturday January 18th

12:30PM, CBS

at Florida Gators

Last Year’s Record: 20-16 (9-9)

KenPom Ranking: 12

Preseason Media Prediction: 2nd

My Projection: 1st

Leading Returning Scorers: Noah Locke (9.4 PPG), Keyontae Johnson (8.1 PPG), Andrew Nembhard (8 PPG)

I think Florida will win the SEC this year and the addition of grad transfer Kerry Blackshear from Virginia Tech is a big reason why. Combine that with the additions of highly rated freshmen guards Scottie Lewis and Tre Mann, along with Andrew Nembhard and several others returning to Gainesville and you’ve got the makings of a potential Final Four squad this year.

Geoff Burke-USA TODAY Sports

Kerry Blackshear

Auburn hasn’t won in Gainesville since 1996 and until beating the Gators twice last season, hadn’t won against Florida since 2009. This will be one of the most difficult games of the year for Auburn.

Wednesday January 22th

6PM, ESPN2/ESPNU

South Carolina Gamecocks

Last Year’s Record: 16-16 (11-7)

KenPom Ranking: 69

Preseason Media Prediction: 10th

My Projection: 13th

Leading Returning Scorers: AJ Lawson (13.4 PPG), Keyshawn Bryant (9 PPG), Maik Kotsar (6.7 PPG)

Remarkably, South Carolina was 16-16 overall last year and finished tied with Auburn for 4th in the SEC. The non-conference schedule was brutal last season for them is a big reason why but they surprised some folks in league play, as is typical of Frank Martin teams. Chris Silva is now playing for the Miami Heat which means he won’t be able to torment Auburn this season. Last season in 2 games against the Tigers, Silva scored 59 points and grabbed 25 rebounds.

This game is also not in Columbia which has been a house of horrors for Auburn the past 2 years. This team will e primarily led by a group of sophomores this year led by Lawson who elected to stay in Columbia for at least another season. With Silva gone, all eyes will be on Lawson if the Gamecocks hope to finish better than 16-16 this year.

Tuesday January 28th

8PM, ESPN/ESPNU

at Ole Miss Rebels

Last Year’s Record: 20-13 (10-8)

KenPom Ranking: 60

Preseason Media Prediction: 8th

My Projection: 10th

Leading Returning Scorers: Breein Tyree (17.9 PPG), Devontae Shuler (10.3 PPG), Blake HInson (8.3 PPG)

Terence Davis is gone but Breein Tyree and Devontae Shuler return to Kermit Davis’s 2nd Ole Miss squad that made a surprising run to the NCAA Tournament last season. A team that was picked to finish last in the league last year, finished 7th in the league but were blown out by Oklahoma in the Round of 64.

Kermit also had Auburn’s number last year sweeping the season series and executing a game plan of slowing the game down, and making tough shots late in the shot clock in both meetings.

Saturday February 1st

5 OR 7PM, ESPN

Kentucky Wildcats

Last Year’s Record: 30-7 (15-3)

KenPom Ranking: 2

Preseason Media Prediction: 1st

My Projection: 2nd

Leading Returning Scorers: Ashton Hagans (7.7 PPG), Immanuel Quickley (5.2 PPG), Nick Richards (4 PPG)

P.J. Washington, Tyler Herro, Reid Travis, Keldon Johnson and others are gone but Ashton Hagans and E.J. Montgomery are back for Year 2 in Lexington. After admitting that they didn’t take Auburn seriously in the Elite 8, Coach Cal will have his kids ready for this one.

Jay Biggerstaff-USA TODAY Sports

Ashton Hagans

This year’s talented freshmen crew is led by Tyrese Maxey, the 10th ranked recruit in America. Kahlil Whitney (14th), Keion Brooks (29th), Johnny Juzang (34th), and Dontaie Allen (68th) make up the talented group of freshmen Coach Cal put together this year. Like last year, they also added a grad transfer, Nate Sestina, from Bucknell. He averaged 15.8 points and 8.5 rebounds a game for the Bisons.

Depending on how things are progressing in the season, this game has a primetime television slot and could very well be Auburn’s 1st Basketball College Gameday appearance.

Tuesday February 4th

6PM, SEC Network

at Arkansas Razorbacks

Last Year’s Record: 18-16 (8-10)

KenPom Ranking: 44

Preseason Media Prediction: 11th

My Projection: 9th

Leading Returning Scorers: Isaiah Joe (13.9 PPG), Mason Jones (13.6 PPG), Jalen Harris (7.6 PPG)

I think the Razorbacks are better than 11th and Eric Musselman is a big reason why. He is doing phenomenal work with the fanbase and is building a heckuva recruiting class for next season. In fact, Musselman and Pearl are battling for several guys in next year’s class inclduing Chris Moore and Jaylin Williams who spent their weekend on the Plains.

But as for this year’s team, they have to first and foremost replace Daniel Gafford. That won’t be an easy task but Isaiah Joe appears ready to be the next star in Fayetteville. Joe had a great freshmen season knocking down 113 3-pointers last season, 2nd in the SEC to Bryce Brown (of course).

Michael C. Johnson-USA TODAY Sports

Isaiah Joe

Saturday February 8th

11AM, ESPN/ESPN2

LSU Tigers

Last Year’s Record: 28-7 (16-2)

KenPom Ranking: 38

Preseason Media Prediction: 3rd

My Projection: 3rd

Leading Returning Scorers: Skylar Mays (13.4 PPG), Javonte Smart (11.1 PPG), Emmitt Williams (7 PPG)

There was a lot of things going on in Baton Rouge towards the end of last season. Will Wade was suspended by the school the day before the regular season finale against Vanderbilt as part of the FBI Investigation and didn’t coach in the postseason. Wade was reinstated in the middle of April and remains on the Tigers sidelines. Wade has turned around the LSU program in short order since taking over in the Bayou and has a solid group returning this year.

However, last year’s SEC Regular Season Champs visit Auburn without Tremont Waters as he’ll now be Bryce Brown’s teammate on the Maine Red Claws in the G-League. LSU has however added Trendon Watford, a highly touted kid out of Birmingham who spurned Alabama to go to Baton Rouge.

Wednesday February 12th

6PM, ESPN2

Alabama Crimson Tide

Auburn has defeated the Tide by an average of 20 points over the past 3 meetings inside Auburn Arena.

Saturday February 15th

5PM, ESPN2

at Missouri Tigers

Last Year’s Record: 15-17 (5-13)

KenPom Ranking: 39

Preseason Media Prediction: 13th

My Projection: 8th

Leading Returning Scorers: Mark Smith (11.4 PPG), Jeremiah Tilmon (10.1 PPG), Javon Pickett (7.7 PPG)

No more Jordan Geist, no more Porters, it’s a new day in Columbia but here’s another team that I think will be better than their preseason prediction. Mark Smith and Jeremiah Tilmon return to bolster the Tigers frontcourt and they got several contributions from their freshmen last year.

Injuries really derailed Mizzou last year but as we’ve seen, there’s been one team picked very low by the media who ends being the surprise team. I think it could be Mizzou this year.

Wednesday February 19th

6PM, ESPN2/ESPNU

at Georgia Bulldogs

Auburn has won 4 straight against the Dawgs, the longest winning streak against Georgia since winning 12 in a row between 1976-1980.

Saturday February 22nd

11AM, CBS

Tennessee Volunteers

Last Year’s Record: 31-6 (15-3)

KenPom Ranking: 20

Preseason Media Prediction: 5th

My Projection: 5th

Leading Returning Scorers: Lamonte Turner (10.9 PPG), Jordan Bone (10.6 PPG), John Fulkerson (3.1 PPG)

Auburn plays 2 of their final 5 games against Tennessee this season with the first being in Auburn. There’s a lot of pieces off both teams that are no longer there and this will be a very interesting game from the sense of all the new pieces who look to make an impact.

Grant Williams, Admiral Schofield, and Jordan Bone have all departed Knoxville. This year, they will need Jordan Bowden and Lamonte Turner to take a step forward. They do bring in highly touted freshman Josiah James, the 14th ranked recruit who will be asked to be a big part of Rick Barnes team in his first season on Rocky Top. A lot of predictions have this team high but others have this team on the bubble. How these 3 develop will go a long way in determining if Tennessee will return to the Big Dance.

Tuesday February 25th

6PM, ESPN/ESPN2/SEC Network

Ole Miss Rebels

Breein Tyree is the SEC’s leading returning scorer from last season.

Saturday February 29th

2:45PM, CBS

at Kentucky Wildcats

Auburn has not won at Rupp Arena since 1988.

Wednesday March 4th

6PM, ESPN2/ESPNU

Texas A&M Aggies

Last Year’s Record: 14-18 (6-12)

KenPom Ranking: 58

Preseason Media Prediction: 12th

My Projection: 12th

Leading Returning Scorers: Savion Flagg (13.9 PPG), Wendell Mitchell (13 PPG), TJ Starks (12.3 PPG)

We’ve looked at every team except for the Aggies who will be the opponent for the final home game for Austin Wiley, Anfernee McLemore, Danjel Purifoy, Samir Doughty and J’Von McCormick. Buzz Williams takes over for Billy Kennedy in College Station and a change was sorely needed. Buzz was the primary target for the Aggies and they got their man. He did a terrific job at both Marquette and Virginia Tech, getting the Hokies a basket away from the Elite 8 last season, losing to Duke in heartbreaking fashion. This will be The Aggies will visit Auburn for the first time since handing the Tigers their only home loss of the 2017-2018 season.

The Aggies do return 5 of their top 6 scorers so perhaps this is another team that could surprise in Year 1 of the Buzz era.

Saturday March 7th

11AM, ESPN/ESPN2

at Tennessee Volunteers

These two schools meet in the season finale at 11AM, for the 2nd straight year, this time in Knoxville.

Thomas J. Russo-USA TODAY Sports

Jordan Bowden

To close, it’s been 213 days since Auburn has played a Basketball Game but we’ve made it! The wait is over as Auburn takes the court tonight at 8PM against Georgia Southern. I’ll have a preview of tonight’s game out later today.

from College and Magnolia - All Posts https://www.collegeandmagnolia.com/2019/11/5/20942380/sec-schedule-preview-season-predictions

[itsworn]

Rare Lightweight 1964 Plymouth Belvedere Still Hits the Track with Mucho Gusto

Like many of the local kids his age, George Edwards was a car crazy juvenile who was just itchin’ to get behind the wheel of his own potent ride. His dad was in the trucking business, and good ol’ pop saw fit to feed George’s passion for horsepower by buying the teenager his first ride at 14. Still too young to legally drive, George settled on turning wrenches on his “new” Model A, and waiting it out until the great state of Pennsylvania would finally let him get a driver’s license to call his own.

In the meantime, George obtained another ride, a ’48 Ford coupe, which he quickly turned into a stock car to race at the local circle track. Since he was still under age, he had to watch another guy drive his racer around the track while he manned the pits. But relief was just around the corner, as the young gun would soon turn 16, and with that celebrated day, his world would become a much happier place.

With license in hand, George hit the strip running. He realized that living life a quarter-mile at a time was what he wanted to do. So he built up a succession of hot rides, starting with a ’35 Ford sedan, which he raced C/Gas solely at his local track, the Pocono Drag Lodge, in nearby Bear Creek, Pennsylvania. Next in the garage was a stout ’33 Ford coupe, which he bought as an unfinished project. He turned it into a nasty C/A class car, which he raced till the fall of ’67.

A Yenko would soon follow, and became his weapon of choice out on the dragstrip. That car would see him through the next four years out on the quarter-mile, and it even accompanied himself and his new bride on their honeymoon, lighting up the rear tires at Cecil County Dragway along the way. Talk about a marriage made in hot rod heaven.

Light Reading George retired from racing in 1972 to keep on his family life and work. He tucked away his racers and held on to them over the years, to remind him of those great days that were now behind him. But something strange happened to him 30-odd years later. He started to get the itch to get back out on the quarter-mile again; and it was a persistent prickling that George knew that he just needed to scratch.

So in 2008, George decided it was time to go fast again. He had a few speed-demons in his collection, but he wanted something new, something different. He had always admired the super stock racers from the ’60s, and thought that might the direction to go in. “Every racer from the ’60s dreamt about owning or just racing one of those drag monsters, especially the factory lightweight ones,” says George.

It was a weekend at the Atlantic City Auto Auction that George’s life changed for the better, a case of “divine” driving intervention some would say. “I didn’t know this particular car would be there, but I guess it was just love at first site,” says George. The car that became the apple of his eye was certainly one of the finest, baddest, and most interesting of the drag wars of the mid ’60s, a ’64 426 Stage III Belvedere lightweight racer, proudly named The Reverend Mr. Black.

This particular Belvedere is certainly a rare ride, a factory race car specifically built by Chrysler to take on Ford and GM out on the country’s 1320s and do it in style. This was one of only 50 lightweight Belvederes built that year, and this one luckily survived the rigors of quarter-mile life, and did it with most of its original drivetrain intact. Only the original rear had been swapped out for an improved Dana 60, still stuffed with beefy 4.56 gears. The 12.5:1 compression, dual-carbureted Max Wedge was still there, and shifted by its original 727 transmission.

So, knowing this was the car he truly “needed” in his life, he sought out the owner and started the ball rolling. Turns out the title bearer wasn’t in the best of health, and really needed to see the car go to a new owner. So George hashed out a deal with him without the car crossing the block, and claimed her as his own. Before the first gavel fell, George already had the car packed away and ready to head to its new home. “Automobiles of this pedigree do not come around often, so I just had to buy it,” confesses George.

Mr Black’s Story The Ebony-skinned coupe had been raced since new, taking on the moniker “The Reverend Mr. Black” after the Kingston Trio song of the same name. Having other racer cars prior to this one, the original owner Howard Williamson dubbed it “III” as it succeeded two other Plymouths of the similar breed. It was purchased new at Powell Plymouth in Jacksonville, Florida. It was in the southeast where the car did most of its damage on the local dragstrips in its early years, preying on the meek Brand X rides that took him on. It won the SS/A class at the ’65 NASCAR Drag Racing Winternationals and even match raced against Richard Petty in Albany, Georgia, and beat “The King” to the finish line.

The car was decked out from the start the way any racer should. From birth, it possessed the 12.5:1 high-compression Super Stock 426-III powerplant, fed by a pair of Carter AFB carburetors on an aluminum cross-ram intake. A stout 727 TourqueFlite did the shifting via the Chrysler pushbutton system (the last year for those controls), and it fed a stout 8 ¾ rear out back stuffed with 4.56 gears. It was also decked out with other divine goodies from Mother Mopar, including a dual-breaker distributor, heavy-duty radiator, and rear located 90-amp battery.

With the purchase of the 12.5 compression engine, you also could order the Light Weight Package, which Mr. Williams did. That option consisted of an array of front-end panels built from aluminum. These included the hood with scoop, fenders, front bumper and supports, and radiator air shield, stone deflector, crossbar, and vertical support brace. Even the carpet was of a lightweight fabric to help shed a few more pounds.

These factory racers were just that, a complete package ready to hit the track with owner’s needing just to “tune and gas-up” to dominate the strip. But there were several modifications made to this lightweight from the start by Williamson. The 12-point rollcage was a must for safety precautions. Dodge van seats replaced the originals and continue with the lightweight racer theme. A set of headers was added to get rid of the spent gases.

All this godly-goodness led to some low e.t.’s and high trap speeds. Williamson held onto the car for a few years, and then passed it on to a small succession of owners, each of whom continued to bring Mr. Black to the track, and thrash any Brand X racer that dared line up against it. More mods were made to the car at this point, including the Dana 60 with Strangle axles out back, a floor shifter between the seats and mini-tubs out back. Skinny mags were added up front, and wide steelies were placed out back — shod in 32×14.5-15 slicks.

These Mopar lightweights continued their quarter-mile domination that its predecessor Plymouth and Dodge racers forged the years before it. The Reverend Mr. Black carried on over the years, taking on comers at tracks across the east. In the mid ’80s, the car was stripped down and the paint refreshed, with the painter recreating its complete graphics package. It then moved on to a small collection in New Jersey, where it sat for a few years, decommissioned from racing with less than 1,000 miles showing on the odometer. The last in line was the gentleman that George ended up purchasing the car from.

King George and the Reverend Once in Edward’s possession, the car got a few new add-ons to help out its time on the track. One key ingredient added by the new owner was a new powerplant. Worried that his thrashing might damage the Max Wedge, he built a new one up from period-correct parts. “I ran the car hard for two years and, as most drag racers, wanted to go faster and also I didn’t want to hurt the old bullet,” Edwards says.

The new powerplant is a stroker motor from Carolina Machine in Johnston, South Carolina.  It’s a 522ci beast based on a 440ci block that’s pushed the dyno to 640 hp at 5,500 and 690 lb-ft torque at 4,400 rpm. It uses a repop cross-ram intake (a Mopar Performance piece which differs slightly from the original) and OEM AFB carbs. It also has the original oil pan with the tie-rod cutout. “My goal was to have the car run a consistent mid 10s, and I’ve accomplished that. Anything more would be tough on the drum brakes,” Edwards admits. Other changes include a transbrake for take offs, a new torque converter to improve 60-foot times, and 4:10 gears to keep the rpm down through the traps.

Future Plans George is smitten with his Mopar ride, and it makes you wonder why he didn’t race more Pentastars back in the day. Having owned only Fords and Chevys over the years, he has now realized that he had missed something. “My one regret is that I only wish I could have owned the Reverend when it was new. It would have been very exciting driving it back then.”

Well, luckily George is making up for it now, hitting the local nostalgia drag races, and thrashing the competition whenever he gets the chance. The 50-plus-year-old ride shows no mercy to its rivals, and dishes out a fiery “sermon of speed” whenever it hits the 1320. Like the rear trunk panel says; “The Reverend Black is Back … and is he ever MAD.”

Fast Facts

ENGINE TYPE: RB Wedge Head, steel block BORE x STROKE: 4.35 x 4.375 BLOCK: 1974 440 ROTATING ASSEMBLY: Scat Crankshafts Stroker crank, forged rods and pistons CYLINDER HEADS: Edelbrock Max Wedge heads COMPRESSION: 12.5:1 CAMSHAFT: Comp Cams solid lifter roller cam VALVE TRAIN: Hughes solid lifter roller rockers INDUCTION: Mopar Performance crossram intake/stock 2×4-bbl Carter AFB carburetors OILING SYSTEM: stock EXHAUST: restored vintage Hooker 2 ¼-inch headers IGNITION: stock tach drive distributor with MSD two-stage ignition box COOLING: stock radiator FUEL: Holley electric fuel pump OUTPUT: 640 hp, 690 lb-ft torque ENGINE BUILT BY: Carolina Machine Johnston, South Carolina

DRIVETRAIN TRANSMISSION: 727 TorqueFlite three-speed auto CONVERTER: Dynamic Converters 9-inch 3,800-stall SHIFTER: Winter Racing floor shift STEERING: stock manual FRONT BRAKES: stock drum REAR BRAKES: stock drum ROLLBAR/CHASSIS: custom cage/Dana 60 rear with 4:10 gears stock springs

WHEELS & TIRES WHEELS: 15×4 American Racing (front) and 15×12 steel (rear) TIRES: 28×4.5-15 Moroso DS2 (front) and 32×14.5-15 Dragway Special slicks (rear)

INTERIOR SEATS: Dodge A100 van seats INSTRUMENTS: Stewart-Warner 9k cable tach WIRING: stock

The post Rare Lightweight 1964 Plymouth Belvedere Still Hits the Track with Mucho Gusto appeared first on Hot Rod Network.

from Hot Rod Network https://www.hotrod.com/articles/1964-plymouth-belvedere-still-hits-track/ via IFTTT

[thisdaynews]

Breaking News: Emmanuel Macron tackles France’s poverty problem

New Post has been published on https://www.thisdaynews.net/2018/09/12/breaking-news-emmanuel-macron-tackles-frances-poverty-problem/

Breaking News: Emmanuel Macron tackles France’s poverty problem

Emmanuel Macron may have declared war on poverty, but in the poorest towns of France there is little love lost for the ex-banker slammed by critics as a “president of the rich”.

Just south of the gleaming architectural treasures of Paris lies Grigny, a town emblematic of entrenched urban poverty in a country that spends more on social benefits than any other in Europe.

The statistics on Grigny’s massive housing estates, a jump-off point for newly-arrived immigrants from west Africa and elsewhere, make for grim reading.

Nearly 45 percent of the town’s 30,000 residents live below the poverty line, surviving on less than 1,000 euros ($1,150) a month. Unemployment is chronic and most teens drop out of high school before their final exams.

Last year, a fire in one of the grim tower blocks of Grigny 2 — one of Europe’s biggest housing complexes, with 17,000 residents — exposed the fact that slum landlords had crammed some 80 people into six squalid apartments.

Another estate, Grande Borne, is notorious as the site of an attack on police in 2016 when youths firebombed officers in their car, badly burning two of them.

Situated 25 kilometres (15 miles) from central Paris, Grigny is the kind of place that shouts “no-go zone” to US President Donald Trump.

But it is more drab than dangerous.

Cafes and supermarkets are few and far between. The only stores doing a roaring trade in the dilapidated shopping centre are money transfer centres where migrants queue to send cash home.

Towns like this will be on Macron’s mind when he launches a highly anticipated plan Thursday to reduce the ranks of the poor in France, which have swelled by a million to nine million since the financial crisis a decade ago.

A self-described centrist, he has attracted criticism over his 16 months in power that his policies — including tax cuts for the wealthiest — have left the poor behind.

France spent 57 billion euros on welfare in 2016 and Macron has expressed frustration at the “crazy amounts of dough” spent on benefits without producing results.

The biggest problem, he argues, is “inequality of opportunity”.

“Depending on where you are born,” he told lawmakers in July, “your fate is often sealed.”

His plan focuses on boosting social mobility and early intervention, by for example providing free school breakfasts for children living in poverty.

‘Social apartheid’

In Grigny, even Macron critics like the Communist mayor Philippe Rio agree that local children need all the help they can get.

Only 25 percent of students pass the high school exam that paves the way to university — far below the national average of 80 percent.

Rio wrote to Macron after he was elected last year, pleading for financial aid for a suburb he says is the victim of “social apartheid”.

A few months later, 150 French mayors descended on Grigny to condemn cuts in government funding to municipalities that they said would hurt the poorest.

Rio expects few improvements from the poverty plan, coming from “a government whose very DNA is anti-solidarity”.

A large majority in Grigny voted for Macron in the second round of last year’s presidential election, mainly to block his far-right rival Marine Le Pen.

But residents feel he has done little to improve their lot.

“At the time I was really pro-Macron. I voted for someone young, dynamic, charismatic — who promised things and made you want to do something,” says mother-of-two Odile Kitenge, director of an association that helps women find work.

These days Kitenge feels “disillusioned”, saying the government has “clearly been abandoned” Grigny.

Practical solutions

An energetic 29-year-old who wears two rings in her nose and her hair in a colourful head-wrap, Kitenge is the kind of self-starter that Macron champions.

Born to Congolese parents who were rarely around — her mother was a cleaner and her father a security guard — she crashed out of school and dabbled in petty crime before straightening herself out and finishing her studies.

She thinks practical help, like more spaces in the creche, would greatly boost employment in Grigny.

Juliette Perchais, a French teacher at Grigny’s worst-performing middle school, believes solving many of the town’s deep-rooted problems would require radical change.

Last year the 29-year-old crowdfunded a trip around the world, visiting innovative schools from Sweden to India.

She came back brimming with ideas — but more aware than ever that France’s teachers are woefully equipped to deal with kids whose parents juggle several low-paid jobs.

Some parents struggle to communicate in French, let alone help with homework.

Aside from inadequate teacher training, Perchais thinks Grigny’s problem is one of disastrous urban planning that has left poor immigrants ghettoised.

“It’s not right that in our school we only have students with the same living standards and ethnic origins,” she said.

“It really feels like we’ve been locked away.”

[captain-unlikelynutbouquet-blog]

Car insurance help please?

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I was hit by a woman in a parking lot. In Texas where I live, certain parking lots are no fault zones if they are private property. I was in one of these no fault zones. I was uninsured at the time. She had Uninsured Motorist Protection as part of her insurance policy. I suffered no damages to my vehicle or person. She suffered $1500 worth of vehicular damage. Her insurance company paid for her damages. I was backing out of a parking space and she came flying around the corner and messed up the entire passenger door of her car on my rear bumper. Like I said I received no damage to my vehicle since I was the one barely moving. She called the police immediately after this minor accident took place. I was not cited on the ticket I received for any accident, only for no insurance. The officer informed me verbally that the accident was my fault only because she had the right of way but that there was nothing they could do about it because of the no fault zone policy. Anyway, now her insurance company is coming after me to collect payment of the $1500 they paid for her damages. I have not agreed to pay this amount because it was a no fault zone and I don't feel I should pay for it. She should not have been going that fast in a busy parking lot with a car full of kids. Although the unofficial technicality states that I was at fault, legally no one was at fault. Her insurance company is also threatening to have my license suspended if I do not pay the amount specified. I did not think that they, as a private company, had the power to have that happen. I've never been in this situation before and need an answer as to whether or not the insurance company can do that or if its just some kind of scare tactic to jolt me into paying but really has no merit behind it. Someone please help!""

How do I prove auto insurance to MN DMV?

My license is revoked and I need to prove to the state of Minnesota that I am insurable. I do not have a vehicle to insure right now, and don't understand why it would be necessary to get insurance for any period of time since I don't have a vehicle, but it is mandated by the state that I prove I have insurance. All the insurance companies I have talked to say that I need to have insurance for a year or the state will take my license again. Is there a way around this or is there an easier way to prove I am insurable without having to pay $1200 for a year of insurance when I don't even have a car?""

What is the average car insurance for a 16 year old?

I'm 16 years old, and just passed my drivers license test. I live in Washington State and am going to be driving a 2002 Hyundai Elantra. Does anyone know how much I could be looking at for insurance monthly? (my mom is currently insured with Progressive) -Thanks""

Car Insurance in CA - Question?

If my dad added me onto his insurance policy (Farmers) on one of our family cars, am I allowed to drive the other car as well? I believe that both cars are under the same policy, since the insurance company asked my mom which car she was driving when she was making a claim. Would I be allowed to drive both cars?""

Trade Cars and Transferring insurance?

Okay so I have a 1966 Thunderbird that I recently got running and insured in order for me to drive it around to sell it. Now I have a man who wishes to trade me for a 64 Thunderbird + $ however the 64 Thunderbird is not quite in drive able condition yet. Since I just purchased the insurance and plates for a whole year would it be possible to transfer the insurance to the other car with little to no cost?

How much will my car insurance be? 17 year old male?

I have been waiting forever to hear back from the insurance company with my quote and it got me curious on how much the average is for a 17 year old male who does not have the best grades but has a clean record and never been in any sort of trouble. I understand you cant know this from just guessing but I was just looking for some estimates so I had an idea on how much to safe for. Thank you to who ever answers!

What Exactly Is Life Insurance?

What I mean is... If my Mom has life insurance on me, then when exactly do I receive the money? And can I spend it on whatever I want??""

The supposed 40million that don't have Health insurance..how many?

How many don't have it because they don't care to have it? How many don't have it because they can not find an affordable insurance plan? How many in this 40million number are not legal citizens? How and who came up with this number?

Car insurance help please?

Hello I just turned 17 I want to do my driving test soon .. And I already have a car .. so I just want to know soon as I pass my driving license How much will insurance cost . - Peugeot 107 - 1.1 - 2008 Straight answers only please .. and can you please suggest cheap insurance company's or ways to make it cheaper .. thank you ..

How much money can I save on my car insurance after completion of the pass plus course?

Give me examples of how much you have saved or a friend or something

How can i get my insurance company (Infinity) fix my car ?

Hey i just got into a car crash last month and i've been calling my insurance company to come fix the car.. but all they'v been doin is taking pictures and asking questions about how i crashed.. and its been a month already and they haven't done nothing all they say is that they'r gona let me know whats gona happen later on, thats it... Any ideas ?""

How do I get the rest of the money for my car that insurance wont pay for?

So I purchased a 2012 Dodge Avenger from Carmax and made the mistake of not getting Gap insurance. Two weeks later a girl ran a red light and totalled my brand new car. Her insurance is only going to pay 16,800 when i paid 19,400 with tax title and license. I dont think i should have to pay money out of pocket for someone elses mistake. What can I do?""

Cheapest and reliable car insurace company?

how has the lowest quote out under normal circumstances? i know they categorize it based on age,sex, etc. just tell me who has the cheapest insurance.is it really GEICO?""

How much would like insurance cost for my 60 year old mom?

i will be paying but is it based on her income? im looking to buy anywhere from $100,000 - $1,000,000 life insurance she suggested i do but i have no idea where to start and what are some legit real life insurance companys? thanks""

Which insurance covers hymenactomy? ?

hi i want to know which insurance covers hymenactomy? i want to know if someone had it done and was covered by insurance and if so which one? i dont have one right now and i dont want to get one that will give me problems with covering the payments. thanks .

What car is cheap to insure for a first time driver?

im learning to drive and need some help in what car to insure. It has to be fairly big ish because im quite a big person. Any ideas. And if so what insurance companies are good for first time drivers

""Is it possible to buy a car insurance without owning a car, and then use it for renting a car?""

I live in India and frequently travel to USA. And when I go rent a car, pay almost double the rental because I have to buy all the coverage. I was wondering if it is possible for me (or my company) to buy some sort of protection policy, using which I can rent the car and not have to buy insurance from them.""

Which is cheapest car insurance in new york?

i want to buy a car but i know the insurance of the car is very expensive. I will like to know if there is a car insurance that i can afford.

Help me find affordable health insurance in ny state if i am not poverty level?

Help me find affordable health insurance in ny state if i am not poverty level?

Health insurance for green card holders?

My father in law is a green card holder for 3 years and just turned 65. I don't think he's eligible for Medicaid but would he be eligible for medi-Cal benefits (he's a california resident)? Any recommendations on where to get reasonable insurance policy?

Confused.com removed cheapest quote?

The other day I tried to get car insurance quote online using confused.com. The cheapest quotes were from admiral, elephant, and bell, the cheapest being around 2000 (i'm 17). However I realised afterwards, that there were some minor details in the quote that needed changing. So I changed them and now, none of these insurers show up in the results, even if I go back to the original quote settings. The cheapest quote is now like 5000. Why is this?""

""How much should $25,000 worth of life insurance cost for a healthy 44 year old non-smoker male?""

weekly,bi-weekly, yearly...whatever?""

Comprehensive car insurance?

my girlfriend and i both have comprehinsive car insurance on our seperate cars... does this allow us to drive each others cars too? i dont know if theres an age limit to it? im 21 shes 19 thanks anthony

Cheap insurance for new drivers? Please help!!!?

Hi guys, I really need some help. I'm just pricing up car insurance, I currently have a provisional licence and i take my driving test next week, I'm doing insurance quotes for a 2005 volkswagen polo s 55 petrol 3 door Manual car, and I've being looking at prices for provisional drivers and newly passed drivers and the prices are ridiculous. Provisional is coming in at approx 1300, which I can cope with for the year but as soon as I pass my test BAM! prices are looking at about 2,700. I've done everything right according to the advice in the internet, we have a secure garage, off-road parking, during the day it will be kept in a secure office car park. I've tried confused.com, comparethemarket, confused.com, gocompare etc and the prices between provisional and full licence are topping 1,200 in difference. Does anyone know of any websites designed for new drivers or maybe places i could look and get quotes which aren't on comparison websites? or maybe any tips that I could use to reduce the quotes because they are ridiculous. We've added on two drivers with over 30+ years each on and also my boyfriend with 7yrs no points. all have no convictions, record, points etc. Thanks :) Kirsty""

Would insurance for a small SUV cost much more than insurance for a pickup truck?

I am thinking about buying a used 2WD CRV, or something of that nature. I am wondering if insurance is typically higher on that type of vehicle.""

Cheapest car insurance for 18 year old ?

H there, once again i ask for thy help!!!>.. < ... so here i just bought a 2002 VAUXHALL CORSA 1.2 SXI BLACK, 1000 pounds, 90k Miles, im on a provisional license, hoping to pass by january. I will do aorund 6k a year miles. car will be used to get to uni, work and commute for shoping. thanks""

Can a college student go back on her parent's insurance?

I am a college student and in 09 I went off my moms health insurance and went on my work ins. If I move and leave my job I may be left without ins is it possible to go back on my moms insurance? I heard you can stay on your parents ins if you are a college student until you are 26 not sure if I can go back though.. Any info will help!

Can I own a car without insurance in NY?

I recently moved to New York from Illinois due to family issue. I am overwhelmed by the heavy traffic and how difficult it is to drive in NY. Fortunately the public transportation is convenient enough so I don't bother driving my car at all and about to sell it. However, my insurance is about to expire in days and I won't be driving this car until someone buys it. The car is registered in Illinois. Can I still keep my car in NY without insurance? What do I have to do with my license plate? What procedures do I have to follow if I sells my car in NY? I've been working very hard try to earn enough money to put my family together, any pennies less to spend is very helpful to my current situtation. Please if anyone can answer it! Much appreciated.""

Auto insurance quotes in New Jersey?

Hi, where can I get auto insurance quotes for New Jersey area? I need to compare quotes online and hoping to save some money. Currently I think I'm paying way too much for it.""

How much over your medical bills cost will an insurance company pay you after a car accident?

How much over your medical bills cost will an insurance company pay you after a car accident?

Best way to buy health insurance?

I had health insurance, up until Sept., when I could no longer pay the expensive ever-increasing policy. I now have a job, but it does not include benefits. Can I buy health insurance online? I mainly want a low-cost policy that would cover accidents. Thanks for any advice!!""

Car insurance extremely high?

i am 17 i haven't bought i car yet, and i have not passed my test, but i have tried to check how much my insurance will be once i have passed my test, i have done checks on small cars e.g vw polo, corsa, Nissan micra's etc but i have not found a quote under 1,700 i cannot afford this price, is there any cheaper insurance companies, or am i just going to have to save up 4 a long time.""

How can I get affordable Medical Insurance for my family?

My wife and I are hoping to have another child soon. Were getting alot of our debt paid off since I am working overtime. However our current Insurance doesn't offer maternity ...show more

How much should I ask for the compensation from insurance?

I had a car accident and the fault side's insurance compay paid for body repair ( abuot $960 in their recommanded bodyshop ) and also the rental (my car is still in bodyshop). I am not sure if I need to ask some compensations for diminished value of my car and also missed work hour on dealing with the accident. I never done this before. My car is 1997 Toyata Collora and the private value from KBB is $3185 (for good condition), some people said the compensation for diminished value could be 40% of the KBB private value, which to me is 3185 x 0.4 = $1274. They are going to replace the right fender, repair and repaint the passenger side door. So I want to know if I ask for $1274 from insurance is fair. I hope anyone can give me some advises on how to deal with this. Thank you!""

Car insurance help please?

Hello I just turned 17 I want to do my driving test soon .. And I already have a car .. so I just want to know soon as I pass my driving license How much will insurance cost . - Peugeot 107 - 1.1 - 2008 Straight answers only please .. and can you please suggest cheap insurance company's or ways to make it cheaper .. thank you ..

Business names?What is a good name for an insurance agency?

What is the best name for an insurance agency

Car insurance? Who is covered? Who is responsible?

Okay I had a question about car insurance... I am on my grandfather's car insurance plan- I live with my boyfriend. I believe I am the only one insured to drive the car....My boyfriend's mother and step-father don't have a car right now and often times ask to borrow my car- I've been letting them until it was brought to my attention that they may not be covered in that car? Does this mean I would be responsible for anything that happened? Or would they? If another car was at fault for the accident what would happen? Anyone know how this works?

""If I get liability only insurance, and somebody else crashes into me, will I get my car repaired?""

My grandma recently gave me a 2005 civic as a gift. Its great but comprehensive insurance is $230 a month. Ive looked around and thats about as cheap as it gets (I am a teenage male that's why its so expensive, despite my flawless driving record). I have been considering getting liability only insurance for a month or 2 because I need to get more hours at work to be able to afford comprehensive. If I get into an accident thats not my fault will i be out of luck or will the at fault driver have to repair my car?""

How much should I expect to pay for car insurance?

I am a 16 year old male in Texas. Having a sports car, being a male, and a teen, approximately how much am I looking to pay a month? What would be the cheapest insurance to have?""

""Automobile incident question. Who pays, the business or insurance?""

Im just curious, if a branch of a tree hit my car and cracked it moderately, and i was parked at the parking lot of a gym, does the damages get payed by my insurance or from the gym? If my gym tells me that the insurance pays for it, should i demand the gym to pay?...since my insurance cost might increase because of this incident.""

Whats your average price car insurance group 12 and Road Tax?

im planning on getting a car lexus is200 in a few months time and wanted to know how much you guys/girls pay monthly or yearly only on insurance group 12 and on road tax. Im 19, passed a month ago. planning on putting the car in my dads name and me as the driver. Dads a good driver had no past accidents (not sure if you need to know that). Thnxs""

I just got my license and have no insurance..?

no car yet but will soon have one...what do you recommend?what will be cheaper to get my own insurance or be put on my parents...

How much will car insurance go up for getting 2 points?

How much will car insurance go up for getting 2 points?

Cheap uk car insurance for a learner driver ? any good companies ??

question for pps in uk my husband just bought a little fiat punto got a provisional licence and wants 2 learn to drive in it we new to all this any idea what kind of cover he needs and any good not 2 expensive companies to try for insurance , hes 44 so not a young lad who wants to race about , he has a brother in law and m8 who both have full clean license who have offered to put the L plates on and take him out at weekends on a quite road to get some experience as well as having driving lessons too when he knows the basics , but we looked on nhet at diffrent insurance companies and they all so diffrent as anyone got any experience of whos the best company or comapnies to try thank you also whats diff with any driver or 1 driver and theres 3rd party etc , like i say we really are all new 2 this any info will be well appreciated thank you""

How much is motorcycle insurance?

If your 18 with no wrecks or tickets and the bike's engine is a 440 (not fast). Any cheap insurance companies?

""Receiving life insurance prodeeds, and my chapter 7 bankruptcy?

Can the trustee take my money that I will be receiveing from my moms life insurance policy?

Estimated car insurance premium for a Camaro/Corvette?

I am looking to buy either a 2002 Camaro (5.7L V8) or a 2000 - 2002 Corvette (5.7L V8). I am wondering how much insurance will cost me. The detailed information and questions are as below: 1. Age: 34 2. Have been driving in the States for little less than 4 years. No accident at all. Only one speeding ticket about 3 years ago. (I had been driving for 10 years in Seoul, Korea with no accident at all, but it didn't count) 3. I used to drive a 2007 Toyota Tundra (5.7L V8), which I sold a few days ago. I paid about 450 dollars/6 months for full coverage. Questions: 1. How much would it cost me if I buy either one mentioned above? (even ballpark number would be appreciated) 2. Do year and purchasing price (or resale value) affect premium? For example, buying a 2008 brand new Corvette or a 2000 used Corvette makes a difference? 3. I know it would be higher to have a sports car, but do my age and driving record affect premium? If yes, how much do they affect?""

Which cheap car insurance companies send the documantetion by Email only?

NOT by post, by EMAIL only""

How can i get car insurance on a car that is not in my name or my husbands name?

Our car (or my husbands car you might say) is legally my father-in-law's because its registered in his name. My husband's car insurance is also under his father, but his name is on his father's insurance policy. (so its my husbands car insurance, but his father is the main one on the policy... he's under his fathers car insurance more or less) The car is registered in Georgia, and the insurance is an out-of-state insurance from Georgia but it insures us down here in Florida (where we live). He has Allstate insurance. How do i come about getting car insurance on our car? I'd have to get it myself... i don't think they want me going under their policy (or whatever it is you call it)... id have to get it on my own. Would it cost a lot more because i'm doing it this way?""

""Insurance problem, auto?

recently took a new job in Canada as a social worker and tried to add business coverage on my vehicle. I was told by my insurance company that this would be commercial because there is some risk I would have kids in the car. I called another company who told me it is just business. The initial company is cancelling my policy as they do not offer commercial insurance which they claim I require. They are not cancelling it for any negative reasons but will this cancellation show up and effect my rates even though it is not my fault. I tried to add the correct insurance but they did not have it so they are cancelling me. Other companies say I do not need commericial coverage so I should be ok with business but because there is a this cancellation I worry. I know if you have a cancellation for things like non payment or tickets it will impact you but what about this?

Can you pay for Car Insurance in monthly instalments by direct debit using someone else's card?

I want to take out car insurance in my name but I do not have a debit card, can I use my mother's account to pay in monthly installments? All the insurance companies I have tried so far will only take a payment for the full amount and will not spread the payments by direct debit if the card is not in my name. Can anyone please help as I only have a post office account and am unemployed receiving benefits so cannot afford to pay the lump sum and have been turned down for a bank account as I have a poor credit rating.""

Does getting a quote mean that I now automatically have Insurance?

I just recently bought a car, I am 18 and I am pretty unfamiliar with how owning a car works (this is my first car). Now since I am so young I would just like to see what prices each insurance company will get me. Now my question is as soon as you accept to get a quote does that mean that they will automatically insure you. Because I want to get as many quotes as I can but just so I can make a decision between different Insurance companies, not so they can automatically insure me just because I requested a quote.""

""Im 21years old,male with a mazda miata 2001. My auto insurance to too high. where can I get cheaper insurance?""

Im 21years old,male with a mazda miata 2001. My auto insurance to too high. where can I get cheaper insurance?""

Where is this affordable healthcare Obama is talking about?

Private insurance is very expensive. No one is telling us where to find an affordable plan. I do not have anything right now because I lost my job and to get the insurance I would have to pay over 4 times what I was paying when I worked.

Can Anyone please tell me where to get cheap car insurance for my 17 year old son who has just passed his test

He Has A ford fiesta and the best third party only quote was 2898.00 .

Insurance premium increase of 50%?

I had an accident with my RV that was about $1,200.00 on my side and very minor on the other vehicle. The accident was considered my fault and being 1 point and my first ever in over 32 years of driving. My insurance company now has increased my premium about 50%. I am in California and would like to understand the criteria for this increase. It looks like the company will recover the full amount paid in the next premiums. Where can one go to understand this? Thanks""

What ia a good affordable health insurance for children?

What ia a good affordable health insurance for children?

I am in texas and want cheap auto insurance (liability)?

I only need what texas law requires (liability) have 2 accidents 1 moving violation my policy doubled please help me find better deal

Can auto insurance keep policy after being told to drop?

Switched insurance companies. the original insurance company WOULD NOT CANCEL the policy. Is this illegal?

Can I be added to a auto insurance policy?

Im shopping around for a car and insurance policy. The car would be brand new with only me as the owner. Because I have never had insurance under my name and am under 25, it is very expensive. I'd like to know if my dad, who has multiple vehicles, would be able to add me to his policy for my car that is not under his name. I'm not sure if that makes sense. Basically, I'd like to get his discount by having his name and mine on the insurance policy, although the car title is only in my name. Thanks for any help! (1 month I pay is the same as a 6 month payment for him. Lot of money)""

Car insurance help please?

Hello I just turned 17 I want to do my driving test soon .. And I already have a car .. so I just want to know soon as I pass my driving license How much will insurance cost . - Peugeot 107 - 1.1 - 2008 Straight answers only please .. and can you please suggest cheap insurance company's or ways to make it cheaper .. thank you ..

Price of insurance on a scooter for a 17 year old?

Ive been looking at a Pulse Lightspeed 2 125cc Sports Scooter Automatic Twist and Go, is it a good first scooter for a 17 year old and how much is the insurance around. If not a good scooter could you give some examples of good ones in the comments.""

How much does an accidet impact your car insurance?

If you had a slight bump with another car down a one track country lane. And you both claimed on insurance and the damage was about 200. When you next go and insure yourself how much more would it be approx. If you were 18

CAR INSURANCE question?

Ive just been made a fiance manager at work and my car insurance has gone down in price ! Can anybody tell me what kind of jobs make your car insurance reduced in price and why ?

Cheapest Japanese cars to insure for a 16 yr old?

Before you tell me that I need to call the insurance company to get a quote, I just want an estimate and I will provide as much information as I can. I live in Wisconsin, my parents have a clean driving record, and I was thinking a Civic. What do u think insurance might cost for a 16 yr old (I KNOW it will be expensive).""

Insurance for provisional drivers?

Hi all I am looking for a cheap insurance deal for one month (not a year).I hold a provisional driving license and want to practice using my husband's car. Do you know of any Insurance Companies that do this kind of service? Thanks

What are some A rated insurance companies? or how do I know my insurance company is A rated?

Is their website that shows A rated insurance companies? I use a small independent insurance broker that represents several insurance companies. The broker is Control Insurance Inc and the auto insurance is Safeway

What is mortgage insurance?

When having somebody co-sign for a morgage with no $$$ down, how does mortgage insurance work? 1) Is it required? 2) Is it permanent? 3) Is it like a car insurance policy - where the money is paid, and if the insurance is never 'claimed' then the money is gone? 3.5) Does a mortgage insurance payment go towards the principle price of the house?""

Is it possible for me to have insurance in Texas and currently live in Arizona?

I have a Texas license, but I currently live in Arizona and am looking to buy a car . Would I be able to purchase an insurance policy from Texas and have everything be sent to my ...show more""

What is the cheapest car insurance in queens ny?

What is the cheapest car insurance in queens ny?

If I get a ford mustang (2000-2006) and get put on my grandmothers insurance would it be cheaper?

I heard it would be cheaper to have me on her insurance because she's older and has a clean record. And I'm pretty sure it varies by state. I live I'm SC

Can I be under my parents' insurance under a different state?

I am a college student with a permanent address in Illinois, but I am in California for college. I am planning on getting a car in California. Can I get insurance under my parents' policy? What is the cheapest way of doing so? Should I register the car under their name or my name?""

Can I drive my car without my name on the insurance?

My husband and I own the vehicle and we have insurance on the vehicle with only my husband's name. Will I get in trouble driving it, even though the vehicle s under my name but not the insurance. This is mainly due to price of insurance. Me being on it will sky rocket he insurance.""

What does comprehensive coverage mean as far as insurance?

What does it actually mean regarding medical insurance AND with car insurance? What kind of things do they cover?

Insurance premium increase for life insurance.?

Can my insurance company increase premiums (from $175.29 a quarter to $331.86 per quarter)when ever they wish? I retained my group life insurance for myself ($70,000)and for my husband ($50,000)after leaving my employment 15 years ago. Connecticut General(CIGNA Group) recently increased the premiums to the amount specified and said if we did not like it we could cancel. I've paid so much money into these policies and I do not wish to cancel now. There's no cash value on either one. We are in our fifties and preparing to retire and will not be able to afford premiums this high. What can we do, if anything? Any light you can shed on this issue is greatly appreciated. Thanking you in advance for your time and assistance.""

Car Insurance Quotes?

Need help with some insurance quotes. Looking to pay cash for a car maybe a 2001 impala, 2000 honda accord, 2001 toyota camry. Need a couple of estimates on how much insurance would be. Driver is over 25, clean driving record, female driver. Lives in Florida. Thanks""

Where to have my car insurance?

My insurance is up for renewal soon and I have a little dilemma. 4 days a week I work away from home living with realatives close to my job and the other 3 days I am at home. not the best situation but as I can't take my kids out of school I have to go where the work is. Now If I insure my car at my realtives address it is 200 cheaper then at my family home but can I legally insure my car away from the family home.

About how much will my auto insurance be a month?

im about to turn 16 and im getting a 2010 camaro ss. and i dont care for yalls opinions u dont need a car that fast or ur spoiled just answer the question and i live in texas

How much does car insurance cost for a 19y/o?

Hey, I just wanted to know what is the avarage cost of car insurance in California( San Diego) for a 19 yearold female and college student""

Does getting car insurance quotes lower your credit score?

I was wondering if getting multiple insurance quotes can significantly lower your FICO score due to inquiries..especially if you have a limited credit history..

Can I get insurance and buy a car using Irish drivers license living in New York?

I will eventually sit the test and get a NY drivers license, but in the meantime can I buy a car and get insurance based on my wholly clean Irish driving licence?""

Where i can get tips of cheap auto insurance?

Where i can get tips of cheap auto insurance?

Question about car insurance?

I called up my car insurers the otger day to change my circumstances (Recently become unemployed) and they proceeded to tell me that car insurance is more expensive if you don't have a job, why is this and how in gods name is that fair, surely if anything car insurance should be cheaper for those who struggle to pay bills as it is, instead of increasingthe bloody premium, I was lucky enough to have the charge waved however how the hell are people on benifits expected to afford to run there cars? Lol really they are just making it harder to find work due to only being able to find jobs locally, is it just me or does this sound unfair?""

Motorcycle insurance prices in uk at 17-19?

Hello, I really want to get a motorcycle at the age of between 17 to 20 (preferably 17-18) but I was wondering how much it would cost for the insurance of a brand new Yamaha r125 and a Kawasaki Ninja 300 at each age between 17 to 20, thanks guys and it would clear some thoughts on how much it would be, what age seems good. I really want to get a bike before uni.""

Can I insure my boyfriends car in my name and him as a named driver?

We are trying to get the cost of his car insurance down and realised if we insure it in my name and add him as a named driver it is much cheaper. Is this allowed even though I have my own car? currently live seperately but due to move in together in 3 weeks.

Do i need condo Insurance?

I have a condo in a six unit building in south florida that is being rented out. The building is insurance by the HOA master policies (windstorm and liability). My question is do I still need to insure my unit? Thanks.

Car insurance help please?

Hello I just turned 17 I want to do my driving test soon .. And I already have a car .. so I just want to know soon as I pass my driving license How much will insurance cost . - Peugeot 107 - 1.1 - 2008 Straight answers only please .. and can you please suggest cheap insurance company's or ways to make it cheaper .. thank you ..

https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/allstate-car-insurance-cheaper-than-geico-zerneisen-sasha"

[junker-town]

The 101 best moments of the 2016-17 NBA season

The long NBA season produced so many incredible moments. Here are our favorites.

The 2016-17 NBA season ends on Wednesday. Well, the regular season ends. The playoffs begin on Saturday. We tend to remember seasons by what happens in the postseason, even when the 82 are filled with surprise and wonder.

This year we decided to celebrate the regular season at its close, before the playoffs wash our brains with new achievements. We’re taking a moment to acknowledge the amazing things that happened over the last six months before we devour and catalog what happens over the next two.

These moments are listed in NO PARTICULAR ORDER, and we apologize if your favorite moment (or team) isn’t represented. Please share those moments in the comments! We’re sure we missed some. With 1,230 games to recall — not including Wednesday’s finales — things are bound to fall through the cracks.

But we are confident these 101 unforgettable moments are worth remembering. They are sorted into convenient (and sometimes overlapping) categories and numbered. We apologize to your phones and hope you enjoy.

DAGGERS

Let’s open at the close with the most memorable daggers of the year.

1. James Harden’s sprinting game-winner

Harden is an MVP favorite, so he leads the list. This slaloming full-court, one-man fast break sealed a win for the Rockets ... whether Nene held a Nugget or not.

2. Serge Ibaka’s no-look, game-tying bank shot

You’ll never see a weirder clutch shot than Ibaka putting it off the glass without looking, to send it to overtime.

3. Giannis Antetokounmpo’s buzzer-beater at Madison Square Garden

The only thing better than The Greek Freak’s shot is Carmelo Anthony’s reaction to it.

4. Kawhi Leonard’s seven-second MVP case

Kawhi buried a clutch jumper and then smothered James Harden on the other end to seal a win for the Spurs. This had people speaking in tongues and denouncing the entirety of Houston.

5. Kyrie Irving’s game-winner on Christmas Day

After hitting the dagger that gave Cleveland its first championship in decades last June, Kyrie followed it up with a turnaround fadeaway over Klay Thompson to beat the Warriors on Christmas. Golden State has nightmares about Uncle Drew.

6. Dion Waiters beats the Warriors

The best dagger of the year, and not just because of the shot. It’s the triumphant pose that really sells it. Business is booming on Waiters Island.

GOOSEBUMPS

We experienced some special emotional moments together this season.

7. The Paul Pierce tribute in Boston

The Truth is playing his 18th and final season in the NBA. There hasn’t been too much pomp ... except in Boston, where Pierce received an appropriate hero’s send-off.

8. The Roots' Basketball History Musical and All-Star intros

This was a damn cool moment that was uniquely NBA in every way.

9. Joel Embiid celebrates T.J. McConnell's buzzer-beater

#NBAVote Joel Embiid http://pic.twitter.com/bNzIpcAub7

— Christian Crosby (@ChristianCrosby) January 12, 2017

There hasn’t been a whole lot for the 76ers to celebrate in the past few years. So to see Embiid’s ecstasy after McConnell beat the Knicks was refreshing and heart-warming. And it gave us one of the greatest photos ever.

10. Coaches speak out

There isn’t really a good category for this one, but it was rather surreal and, for the majority of NBA fans, refreshing. It helped define the league, given the silence of management in other major American sports. Here’s Paul Flannery’s Shootaround on coaches speaking up in the wake of Nov. 8.

11. DeMarcus Cousins and Joel Embiid become BFFs

In a season rife with beef, two talented big men found friendship and mutual respect. There is hope for America.

12. Russell Westbrook and Kevin Durant share one more alley-oop

One of the dominating storylines at the All-Star Game was the opportunity for Durant and Westbrook to reunite on the West team. Would Steve Kerr play them together? (Yes, of course.) Would they acknowledge each other? Would Westbrook feed Durant for a transition alley-oop? He did, and the world reacted like the Berlin Wall fell. The reaction from the other West All-Stars was worth the price of admission.

13. Drake + Doris

The Raptors annual Drake Night turned into an evening of Canada’s favorite son wooing ESPN’s star broadcaster Doris Burke. It culminated in Drake asking DoBu to dinner on live television and Burke later accepting on Twitter. Basketball and romance — all in a night’s work for the Toronto Raptors.

14. Tim Duncan’s jersey retirement ceremony

Everything good about the Spurs is on display here.

15. TNT’s emotional Craig Sager tribute

The world lost a bit of color in December when Craig Sager died after a years-long fight with leukemia. TNT paid tribute to the beloved sideline reporter with a five-minute eulogy narrated by Ernie Johnson.

16. The Sager charity shootout

Two months later, on All-Star Saturday, the NBA put together a special moment starring DJ Khaled, Steph Curry, Candace Parker, Reggie Miller, and others. The purpose: raise $500,000 for the Sager Strong Foundation. Curry couldn’t hit a halfcourt shot in street clothes, so to punctuate the moment, Shaq lifted up Sager’s youngest son for an assisted finger roll.

WTF

The NBA stays weird. Note that the LMAO category has plenty of items that could double in this category.

17. The Warriors’ bizzaro groundbreaking ceremony

Golden State officially began work on its new arena in San Francisco in January. The Warriors don’t do anything boring these days. So of course, the ceremony featured dancing construction workers and excavator ballet. YES, EXCAVATOR BALLET.

THE CRANES ARE DOING A SYNCHRONIZED DANCE WHAT IN THE HELL IS GOING ON http://pic.twitter.com/VfbbcsFGx5

— Courtney Cronin (@CourtneyRCronin) January 17, 2017

18. Lance Stephenson returns to Indiana

The Pacers had a blasé season ... until Lance Stephenson blew into town in March. In his first game back in Indianapolis, he led a stirring comeback, insulted the Raptors with a garbage time layup, acted like he had no clue why they were so mad, and earned Paul George’s highest praise. It was better than MJ in the 4-5.

19. The great NBA potato mystery

In March, various NBA players began receiving personalized potatoes in the mail. Of course, it was viral marketing. For two days there, you had internet writers going full Rust Cohle.

20. The NBA’s Flat Earth Society

Just before All-Star Weekend, Richard Jefferson and Channing Frye revealed on their podcast (which was a revelation in itself) that Kyrie Irving believes the Earth is flat. Most of All-Star Weekend, thus, was filled with serious questions about Kyrie’s beliefs — Adam Silver even had to respond to it during a press conference! — and jokes at Irving’s expense. Shaq later pranked everyone by claiming he too believes the world is flat.

BEEF

If there was one constant this season, it was BEEF. Everyone’s so mad at each other all of a sudden.

Mark D. Smith-USA TODAY Sports

21. Russell Westbrook vs. Zaza Pachulia 22. Kevin Durant vs. Andre Roberson 23. Steph Curry vs. Russell Westbrook and Semaj Christon

Let’s get the NBA’s biggest running beef out of the way with these three critical moments. When the Thunder visited Golden State in January, Zaza put Westbrook on his tail and the OKC star vowed retribution. In Durant’s highly anticipated return to Oklahoma City, ex-teammate Roberson got into his face and butted heads with him. Durant missed the second game in OKC due to injury, so Semaj Christon and eventually Westbrook mixed it up with Curry. I’m starting to think there’s some bad blood here.

24. Serge Ibaka vs. Robin Lopez

Ibaka and Lopez almost traded punches in a late-season battle between the Raptors and their arch-rival Bulls. Luckily, both whiffed and so each were only suspended a game. This could have been much more notorious.

25. Jusuf Nurkic vs. the Nuggets

Denver traded the Bosnian Beast to Portland — its closest rival for the No. 8 seed in the West — and Nurkic immediately became an All-Star-caliber player. He groaned at his diminished role with the Nuggets, so when the Blazers freed him, he made sure to remind Denver what it was missing. At the conclusion of his epic revenge game against the Nuggets in March, he wished his old team a “happy summer.” Savage.

26. Charles Oakley vs. the Knicks

Knicks owner James Dolan had Knicks legend Oakley booted from a game, arrested, and banned from Madison Square Garden over some personal drama between the two. The entirety of Western civilization took Oak’s side; eventually, the league tapped Michael Freaking Jordan to broker a cease fire.

27. C.J. McCollum vs. Chandler Parsons

We hit the lottery by not signing you https://t.co/eSiBaNT061

— CJ McCollum (@CJMcCollum) January 28, 2017

These dudes had such a petty social media fight that the league had to send a memo to teams telling everyone to chill their Twitter fingers.

28. JaVale McGee vs. Shaq

There’s actually nothing funny about this one. The Warriors and both dudes’ moms got involved. This was definitely a season in which beef went a little too far.

29. LeBron vs. Charles Barkley

LeBron had enough of Chuck’s chatter and produced the research to bear. He brought up Barkley spitting on a kid and throwing a dude through a window! So of course, Chuck announced that the feud was over. YEAH it is, buddy. It’s over.

30. LeBron vs. LaVar Ball

Oh, God. LaVar Ball. LaVar talked about how Lil’ Bronny won’t ever measure up to his dad because NBA stars can’t raise talent like LaVar did. Big Bron snapped back. This is the closest he’s ever been to old-man status and it’s just great.

31. DeMarcus Cousins vs. Meyers Leonard

Now this is a great beef. Inexplicable, even to the parties involved.

32. Funeral Game

Speaking of inexplicable, Wizards vs. Celtics came out of nowhere to become the fiercest team rivalry in the league. John Wall did not appreciate getting booped by Jae Crowder, and next thing you know, the Wizards are wearing all black to a game in January to signify the Celtics’ “funeral.” Needlessly intense, like all good NBA beefs should be.

DRAMA

A close cousin of BEEF is Drama, from the courtroom to the locker room.

33. Palace intrigue in Lakerland

Jeanie Buss hired Magic Johnson, fired her brother ... and then her brother tried in hilariously inept fashion to replace her as the controlling owner of the Lakers. She sued, her brother disappeared, and all is now well in Lakerland. What a weird family.

34. The night Boogie got traded

DeMarcus Cousins had a strange All-Star Sunday, playing only two minutes as trade rumors swirled. Immediately after the game, as he faced the media scrum, a Kings PR staffer apparently whispered in his ear that it looked like he was going to be traded. The news broke less than an hour later.

35. Kevin Durant’s return to OKC

We covered the beef involved above, but the scene in Oklahoma City was something else. The cupcake shirts and signs, the chants, the boos.

36. The Bulls’ Instagram saga

Dwyane Wade and Jimmy Butler decided to trash their teammates in the media ... so Rajon Rondo (whose current role in the NBA is apparently to cause havoc wherever he goes) lit them up on Instagram.

DUNKS

Be honest, this is what you came for. Enjoy.

37. Willie Cauley-Stein on the Celtics

38. Terrence Ross 360

Holy cow! Terrence Ross throws down a 360 degree jam http://pic.twitter.com/HbeUfuJoJS

— CSN Northwest (@CSNNW) December 27, 2016

39. Sam Dekker on Enes Kanter

You have to click through for that one because Vine died for our sins. But YO.

40. Andrew Wiggins on JaVale McGee

A better look at Andrew Wiggins' monster dunk! http://pic.twitter.com/OHGPXFDyBV

— NBA (@NBA) November 27, 2016

41. Zach LaVine on Alex Len

Another Vine, so click through. But trust me: Do it.

42. Russell Westbrook dagger dunk on Clint Capela

43. Larry Nance Jr. on Brook Lopez

44. Larry Nance Jr. on David West

Here is the Dunk of the Year by the Dunker of the Year. To my knowledge, Nance has still not apologized to West for his incredible disrespect. This is unacceptable.

LMAO

Here at SB Nation, we like to laugh. (You’ll notice that this is the biggest category.) The NBA came through for us this year.

45. The Lakers thought LeBron was praising D’Angelo Russell (he wasn’t)

When social media goes wrong.

46. SI’s Sam Hinkie 2.0 story

This brilliant Chris Ballard profile fueled two weeks’ worth of Twitter takes. I treasure this story like the beautiful young child it is.

47. Steph Curry and Draymond Green wearing cupcake shirts

After the Warriors bludgeoned the Thunder in Kevin Durant’s aforementioned return to OKC, Curry and Green acquired cupcake T-shirts ... and wore them in the postgame.

48. Michael Jordan trashes the Warriors to their owner’s face

During a meal while NBA owners negotiated a new collective bargaining agreement, the Hornets’ boss, who once won 72 as a player, trashed the Warriors’ empty 73-win record to Golden State owner Joe Lacob’s face because his team didn’t win the ring. MJ never loses.

49. JaVale McGee made Draymond Green-Face blankets

No one has more fun than the Warriors. Speaking of which ...

50. Steph Curry loses Marcin Gortat

Curry won’t be the MVP again, but he has some magical moments.

51. Steph Curry lays down to avoid a poster, fails

One of the funnier subplots at All-Star was Giannis Antetokounmpo playing way harder than anyone else. So when Curry was back to defend a Giannis break, he decided to avoid posterization by literally lying down. Giannis got him on a putback, like, a minute later anyways. Sheesh.

52. Steph Curry slides on the floor after a chest bump

This is my nominee for NBA Meme Material of the Year.

53. Kyle Lowry and DeMar DeRozan on the Jumbrotron

There’s no friendship in the NBA more special than the one between Lowry and DeRozan. This moment captures that perfectly.

54. Epic Warriors jokes hit Jeopardy!

NBA Twitter denizen Loren Chen made it to Jeopardy! and delivered some high-profile meme jokes at the Warriors’ expense.

55. The Cavaliers’ Halloween party

As if the Warriors-Cavs rivalry needed more heat, LeBron had jokes for Golden State at his Halloween party. They have gravestone cookies for Steph Curry and Klay Thompson!

56. Dion Waiters forgets a quote he wanted to share

To be fair, Dion Waiters is too busy HITTING DAGGERS to remember stuff.

57. Shaq tackles his co-workers

When Randy Moss visits Inside the NBA, Shaq takes the opportunity to do what he wants to do every week: tackle Charles Barkley and Kenny Smith.

58. The Spurs retire Matt Bonner’s flannel shirt

Respect.

59. Festus Ezeli’s locker room speech gets shut down

Maybe the funniest scoop of the season from ESPN’s Chris Haynes:

After suffering a [...] loss to Milwaukee, Ezeli, in street clothes, addressed the team in the locker room with a stern speech centered on playing with urgency, sources told ESPN. Then two games later, after a crushing defeat in Memphis, Ezeli once again started giving a team speech, but he was cut short.

McCollum interrupted Ezeli in midsentence and told him that was enough, sources told ESPN. [...] Players were desperately pouring out every ounce of effort trying to change the trajectory of the season, and being lectured by someone who wasn't even playing wasn't received favorably.

60. MUSECAGE

What the hell are we doing here ESPN http://pic.twitter.com/10SHUqOrIv

— CJ Fogler (@cjzero) March 26, 2017

Kobe Bryant is getting even weirder in retirement. This is a snip (via @cjzero) from his education puppet show/horror film, which debuted in the middle of the day on ESPN and is intended for children.

61. "Keep Calm Like Kristaps Porzingis"

Latvian music video of the year every year for the rest of Porzingis’ career.

62. LeBron dancing like nobody is watching

... because he thinks that nobody is watching.

63. Mo Speights ethers the Clippers (he's a Clipper)

After a horrific loss to the Warriors, Speights, then brand new to L.A., implored the Clippers to stop being the Clippers.

64. Sweater Mom vs. Gold Suit Man

CHRISTMAS SWEATER MOM VS GOLD SUIT MAN DANCE OFF http://pic.twitter.com/F4WJZibHFh

— the geek freak (@rachaelhoops) November 27, 2016

65. The bonkers Nets vs. Clippers double overtime game

Nothing about this game made sense. Nothing.

66. J.R. Smith mid-possession dap

J.R. Smith stopped playing defense so he could say hello to his friend Jason Terry on the bench. The other team scored.

67. Klay Thompson living the best life

No one enjoys his awesome NBA life more than Klay Thompson, which is odd considering he so often looks grumpy. He enjoyed a mid-interview beer, showed off his paper plane engineering skills during a press conference, and brought his very good dog to work.

68. Obama cracks a J.R. Smith joke

The Cavaliers hustled to visit the White House two days after the election. Once there, No. 44 got in a crack on the Clown Prince of the NBA.

69. Zaza Pachulia’s erotic celebration

Zaza smacks his own butt and dances. Go Warriors.

70. Devin Booker gets ejected but still signs an autograph for a fan

This was overall the chillest ejection ever. Booker gave the ref a thumbs up, said bye to his homies, and signed a card for a fan on his way out.

71. Marc Gasol's billion dollar strut

I want to apologize.... TO ABSOLUTELY NOBODY!#GrindCity http://pic.twitter.com/JN6p8YdV0G

— Marc Gasol (@MarcGasol) November 17, 2016

72. Human Hungry, Hungry Hippos

This apparently existed out there in the world before this year, but the Cavaliers brought it to NBA intermissions and the world was never the same.

73. The Grizzlies’ mascot strips to "Pony"

For your viewing pleasure: @grizz dancing to @Ginuwine's Pony. http://pic.twitter.com/uySCMjagfT

— Memphis Grizzlies (@memgrizz) November 9, 2016

Grizz, the Memphis Grizzlies mascot, stripping to Ginuwine’s “Pony” is squarely in the middle of the Venn diagram that constitutes SB Nation’s wheelhouse. It gets better on every viewing, too.

74. Sam Dekker’s doink

Dekker almost had the Dunk of the Year, but he succeeded in winning Doink of the Year.

75. The Lakers' failed tank job

It’s difficult to understate how hilarious the Lakers’ failed attempt to lose to the 60-win Spurs in the final week of the season was. L.A. played Metta World Peace 17 minutes and still won!

76. Kemba Walker shimmies ... while his shot clanks

Here’s the blooper of the year. Kemba takes the classic Nick-Young-celebrating-a-miss moment and revs it up by giving us a shimmy.

AWE

We all crave moments that take our breath away. Basketball provides.

77. Russell Westbrook's 45-foot nutmeg bounce pass

I mean ... what? What? How? I don’t think I watched a highlight more times than I watched this one in 2016-17.

78. Anthony Davis' record-destroying All-Star fourth quarter

For 55 years, Wilt Chamberlain held the record for most points in the All-Star Game with 42. Davis destroyed it by double digits when he dropped 52 at home in NOLA in February. Those 52 points included 36 off dunks. It was that kind of All-Star Game.

79. Steph Curry’s impossible layup

Curry and the hoop must have a telepathic relationship or something.

80. John Wall between the legs pass on the break

We saw Westbrook go between someone else’s legs on the break. Wall does it to himself. Magical.

81. Steph Curry hits 13 threes in a game

The dude hit 13-of-17 from deep in a game back in November. If there were any questions as to how he’d play with Kevin Durant, he answered them. (We kept asking, nonetheless.)

82. Kyrie Irving fakes John Henson off the court

Best handles in the NBA.

83. The Knicks and Hawks go to four overtimes

This game included multiple clutch Carmelo Anthony shots, Paul Millsap playing 35 straight minutes and a full 60 overall, and a bonkers fourth overtime. The Hawks won, but isn’t it the journey that counts?

84. John Wall Shammgods Al-Farouq Aminu

If anyone can compete with Kyrie on insane handles, it’s Wall.

85. Kristaps Porzingis’ one-handed block

It’s too bad this only registers as a blocked shot in the box score. I feel like the Nets should have lost points when Kristaps did this.

86. Kris Dunn dribbles around Shabazz Napier

This is a dribble equivalent of a poster dunk. So much disrespect. Poor Shabazz is left having no idea what has occurred.

87. The Warriors score 149 in regulation

... and they didn’t even break a sweat! In fact, Steph Curry, Klay Thompson, and Draymond Green all sat the fourth quarter.

88. Serge Ibaka Revenge Game

Serge actually got a perfectly respectful welcome back to Oklahoma City in his first game there after being traded to Orlando. But he was not respectful to the Thunder, scoring a career high and hitting a game-winner.

89. The Cavaliers’ White House mannequin challenge

Cleveland recruited Michelle Obama to participate in the best sports Mannequin Challenge during that meme’s run. What a way to cap eight years of basketball being the official sport of the White House.

90. Isaiah Thomas becomes a Boston legend

Isaiah has been incredible all season, but it was in January where he became the King in the Fourth with a string of clutch performances, including this game-winner against the Hawks.

91. Klay Thompson's 60 in 29 minutes

When you play with Steph Curry and Kevin Durant, you get clean looks more often than usual. That doesn’t mean that scoring five dozen in less than a half-hour of play is anything less than insane. Klay is my top candidate to drop 75 in a game in the next five years.

92. Westbrook's 57-point triple-double against the Magic

This was the individual performance of the year for me, edging the next moment on the list. The Thunder, fighting for favorable playoff position, trailed the Magic in the fourth. Russ took over and sent the game to overtime with a game-tying triple. He ended up registering the highest-scoring triple-double ever.

93. Devin Booker's 70

The young Booker became the sixth player ever to score 70. Sure, he did it in part because the Suns intentionally fouled the Celtics in garbage time to get the ball back for Devin. They still count. Booker is super legit.

94. Giannis Antetokounmpo covers 45 feet in one dribble

How?!

95. The LeBron vs. Paul George duel

As LeBron and the Cavaliers prepared for the playoffs and PG and the Pacers were fighting just to make it, the duo had an epic duel that eventually ended with a Cleveland win but an Indiana moral victory.

96. The Warriors vs. Rockets thriller

Houston’s signature win of the season came in the best game of the season ... and the first one that kept everyone up way too late on a weeknight. We had a James Harden triple-double, a Kevin Durant explosion, and a Draymond Green kick — pretty much everything you could want from Rockets-Warriors minus Patrick Beverley ending someone’s season.

97. Marc Gasol’s no-look outlet

This was the season in which Marc’s latent swag came into full view.

98. James Harden's wild no-look lob

This is one of those plays that looks so pretty in realtime and then completely blows your mind when you slow it down and see what happened. It’s a perfect symbol of the extraordinary season Harden had.

99. An impossible Warriors fast break

Steph Curry just throws it up & KD flushes it home! https://t.co/BFKnzbfVnn

— NBA TV (@NBATV) December 6, 2016

Eighty feet without the ball ever touching the floor, and after it leaves Draymond Green’s hands, it never even touches someone whose feet are touching the floor. Unreal.

100. Kevin Love outlet to LeBron for the tie

This incredible play sent an incredible game between the Cavaliers and the Wizards to overtime. In case you’d forgotten, Love can pass as well as any big man and LeBron is cold as a Popsicle in Nunavut.

101. THE BEST MOMENT OF THE NBA SEASON

And finally, the best, most appropriate moment of the 2016-17 NBA season: Metta World Peace hitting a free throw and declaring to all who care to listen: “I love basketball!”

Metta World Peace just loves basketball https://t.co/1jjdkANloe :: @TheCauldron

— SB Nation NBA (@SBNationNBA) November 2, 2016

Thanks for spending the regular season with us. Stick around for the playoffs, too. It’ll be great.