#whispered_incorrect_quotes

[whispers-of-lilith]

Law: "I don't need a vacation."

You: "And yet your eyes have their bags packed and ready to go, captain."

[whispers-of-lilith]

You: I don't know, sometimes I just feel like doing something stupid, ya know?

Gojo: I'm stupid, do me.

[whispers-of-lilith]

[At the store]

Sanji: Excuse me, this lovely companion of mine lost their moss-headed boyfriend, can I make an announcement?

Worker: Uh, sure go ahead.

Sanji: *dramtically clearing his throat at the pa system* goodbye you little shit.

You: ...I knew I shouldn't have let you make the announcement.

[whispers-of-lilith]

Toji: "I like my partners submissive."

You: "Tf am I submitting to? Poverty from your gambling addiction?"

[whispers-of-lilith]

You: "Hey Law, truth or dare?"

Law: "Truth."

You: "When was the last time you slept?"

Law: "...dare"

You: "It's been 42 hours, go to sleep."

Law: "I don't like this game."

[whispers-of-lilith]

You: You're the most jealous man I know.

Shanks: You know other men?

You: Shanks... the crew is *mostly* men.

Shanks: *Desperately trying to hold back tears*

[whispers-of-lilith]

You: "I love you–"

Gojo: "I love you t– wait, why does it sound like you're not finished?"

You: "I love you– but sometimes your brain is so empty that they try to open a spirit halloween in it."

[whispers-of-lilith]

You: Hey babe, can you help me rearrange my room later?

Toji: How 'bout I rearrange your guts later instead?

You: Why are you like this...?

[whispers-of-lilith]

Y/n: *painting Kids nails for the third time that week* "I swear, if you chip the polish again, I will lovingly cut your other arm off."

Kid: "Yeah, yeah, sure thing sweetheart."

Also Kid: *literally chips his freshly painted nails in a fight the next day*

Y/n: *is on the ship, nowhere near the fight* *squints eyes* "Something just happened..."

[whispers-of-lilith]

Vash: Relax and be a good proton

You: What?

Vash: Stay positive love! *finger guns*

[whispers-of-lilith]

You: "Okay so, a group of fish are called a school."

Luffy: *nods furiously*

You: "But they're just fish, right?"

Luffy: "Mhm, mhm."

You: "So you can't catch them, claiming to be their 'teacher' because you want them to learn how to cook themselves."

Luffy: "WHAT DO YOU MEAN-?!"

[whispers-of-lilith]

You: "Why do you look extra angry today Sugu?"

Suguru: "I'm just thinking about that one time 10 years ago when I fell off a swing at the park & some kid had the audacity to say, 'what season is it, Fall??'.

You: "uh..."

Suguru: "You know, I'm still looking for that kid."

[whispers-of-lilith]

Chopper: How do you make square shaped balloons?

Luffy: Blow square shaped breaths.

Law: *Looking into the camera like the Office* Everyday... every damn day, we stray further and further from god. *sobs*

[whispers-of-lilith]

Y/n: *talking with Nami about a 401k and other work related things.*

Zoro: "Why would anyone want a 401k? That's way too far to run if you ask me."

Y/n: *looks at Zoro incredulously* "...what?"

[whispers-of-lilith]

*Cuddling with Vash*

You: "Hey Vash, it's been a while since we last - you know - smashed."

Vash: *excitedly getting up like a golden retriever* "Oh, yeah! You get ready and I'll be right back!"

You: *strips while waiting for Vash to come back*

Vash: *walks in with his GameCube* "I'm so hyped, I haven't played smash in forever, do you want the purple or silver controller-...?"

Also Vash: *notices you're naked* "Well... I'm not sure why you would want to play Smash Bros. naked, but I like your enthusiasm!" *finger guns*

[whispers-of-lilith]

Shanks: "Hey Beck, would you still love me if I was a worm?"

Benn: "No."

Shanks: "But- I'd still love you if you were a worm..."

Benn: "That's nice, the answer is still no."

Shanks: *proceeds to pout for the rest of the day until Benn gives him the best dick down as an apology for saying he wouldn't still love him if he was a worm.*