#why can’t I just be a girl with a job!

[livvyofthelake]

saw a tiktok that was like. Daily Affirmations: my work crush doesn’t like me. and now i’m like wow i wish i could send this directly to all of my new high schooler coworkers. who are all really annoyingly obsessed with our one male manager because he’s The Chill Manager. you may have seen me refer to this man before (it’s different when EYE love him because we are the same age. the high schoolers being obsessed with him is weird as hell and he DOES need to stop encouraging this) back in winterspring i was doing a lot of opening shifts with him and i was joking that we had the king and lionheart dynamic. which was real at the time but not so much the vibe now just because like. the vibe has shifted idk i work different shifts there’s different other managers i’m technically promoted there’s all these new people i don’t care about. the vibe is different. anyway. don’t care for these high schoolers and their obsession with him. especially because they’re like actual assholes sometimes to my friend managers… (they used to just work here and then two managers left and they got promoted) (i also technically got promoted at the same time but they rank above me and do more shit that i don’t want to do so like. obviously i’m not bitter or jealous about it. like if i had to manage a bunch of teenagers that didn’t respect me i might cry every single day) (which is happening to one of them fr. they’re literally such assholes to her sometimes it’s crazy like she’s not even as mean to you people as she should be…) not to side with like. The Man or whatever but unfortunately i’m not a teenager with a part time job i go to when i don’t have soccer practice so i cannot relate to the proletariat in this situation… like i knowww they’re seeing my girl as Bitch Manager and it’s making me hate them soooo bad. like you idiots can’t even fold jeans correctly!! i hate you!!!!

[kelin-is-writing]

Everyone, remind me to not trust my dad’s relatives with food and parties because they can’t do even that much the right way. The peoples are so questionable 💀

[hannagoldworthy]

So. This got photographed, because I finally blocked the IP address (bye Felicia) but I can’t stop laughing at how little this “anon” has bothered to disguise her writing style. Oh, this asker uses the word Kenobist like it’s a clever insult and writes like Sheev Palpatine having a quick fap over his own perceived superiority between meetings, just WhO cOulD iT bE?

(Golly gee whiz, Domina, that “block” didn’t last very long. I’d bet my left buttcheek you don’t know where the block button is, just as you don’t know how to work the tag or content filters.)

But thanks for confirming that you’ve never darkened the doorstep of any university with a decent engineering department, if any university at all. Nor have you ever spoken with an engineer, because if you had, you’d realize that a decent majority of engineers have Big Himbo Energy. The engineering fraternity house at my college looked like the house in Flubber before the dean made them take their little machines down. I briefly dated an engineering student with a 4.1 Honors GPA who bought a shitbox car and souped it up to drive in drag races on weekends; I broke up with him after the first date because he drove the car up to my parents’ house and showed it off to my entire family while it was literally smoking and leaking oil on their driveway. A meteorologist - basically a weather engineer - who worked with my father once ran out, bare-headed, into a storm of golfball-sized hail because, and I quote him verbatim, “HOT DAMN I WAS RIGHT, LEMME GET A SAMPLE!”

And…you’re saying that’s NOT Anakin Skywalker? “Modified the Twilight until it was practically unflyable for anyone but him” Anakin? “Ran face first into a lightning attack because he didn’t think his strategy through” Anakin? “Did not realize his wife was pregnant after regularly SpaceTiming her for months, lifting her up and twirling her, AND full-body hugging her” Anakin? “Had a prophetic dream where Padme was still having labor pains after giving birth to one baby and interpreted that to mean she was dying and not GIVING BIRTH TO THE OTHER TWIN” Anakin? THAT Anakin, from the high canon Lucas movies, which you have most definitely watched front to back?

You underestimate the power of your own blorbo, Domina. Anakin Skywalker can be both a mentally unstable himbo AND an engineering prodigy, and in fact, HE IS. And I would think that his number-one stan would be the first to point out that those two very different facets of his personality lend depth to his character. But, then again, I am talking to the idiot who drags Obi-Wan Kenobi into every conversation, even in other fandoms, and then accuses everyone ELSE of being obsessed, so I suppose I should not expect that very basic level of perception from you.

Oh, and also? Thanks for that extra boost of motivation! Now my plans to get my computer fixed have been moved up, because I intend to write even MORE Himbokin Skywalker, just to spite you! Mission Failed Successfully, HUZZAH!

[wearingmysweater]

just spent $100 on 5 seconds of summer self titled merch…

[twelve-kinds-of-trouble]

why does the economy hate girls who hate maths </3 I am sorry but I am so so stupid

[yourheartinyourmouth]

guys tell me i’m being silly for being disappointed that i didn’t get a call back today for a job i applied to friday

[steviescrystals]

i am experiencing emotions rn and idk what they are :)

[recallthename]

.

[roseworth]

i just want to know what the batfam fans who don’t read comics that say things like “why do they never do this in canon 😣” think the comics are actually about

[mcnuggyy]

how to be normal about my cousins 4 year old dragging my plushies across the dirty floor while I broom and mop the kitchen

[my-chemical-rot]

I’m several weeks late but to celebrate finally getting my driver’s license I’m gonna spend a frankly ridiculous amount of money on a single (1) beverage

[lilgynt]

naturally i’m gonna be very upset at 6:09 am after an all-nighter over my brother and his actions

[fingertipsmp3]

I wish I had a gun so I could shoot something that is not alive

[bluebellthesponge]

still can’t believe i spent time always every couple of months just trying to see how long i would leave my nails alone to grow for (usually at most i think i left them to grow for three months)

[ramonathinks]

tags: older reader x younger satoru gojo, squirting, slight overstimulation, oral (f), smut | gojo satoru

note: i actually don’t like this fr but lol

you’ve never had a real orgasm. not at all in your almost 33 years. no man has ever even almost got you there. but you didn’t know that, you thought you had one before. feeling a bit good and then the feeling disappeared. you were… satisfied maybe? but it was always like this with guys your age.

so you knew why it was different with satoru. but man, it was different. really different.

he was 6’7, had a pretty long and girthy cock between his legs and always had a goofy smile on his face. he was 25 and for some reason… he was interested in you, instead of the younger and presumably prettier girls in the office.

from the moment he transferred to your department, he was in your face and trying to get your attention. it was always something with him — picking up some coffee for you, walking you to your car, and flirting.

it was always something small… a whisper in the ear to praise you for the good job on your presentation or a hand on your lower back.

it was supposed to only be dinner. yet here you are, with him in your bed and his mouth on your cunt.

“you’re delicious.” he mutters, lapping at your folds, stretching your lips open so he can get every bit of wetness spilling out of you. he was avoiding your flit, getting closer and closer before he moved away to focus elsewhere. kissing the trail of wetness on your thighs or dipping his tongue back inside of you. your stomach clenched and you could feel more wetness spilling out and that’s when his lips met your clit — a tiny kiss before he rubbed his face into you and sucked hard enough to make your toes curl.

he can barely wait anymore, he climbs off the bed before removing the last layer of his clothing and rubbing his aching leaking cock against your folds. pushing in, you both moan.

“you’re so fucking tight,” he hisses, moving his hips back and forth, inching himself in. he’s holding back, seeing your face twist between pain and pleasure.

“please i—” your brain is fuzzy and feels like mush, you can barely think. he’s so big and just from what’s inside, he’s close to digging you out.

“shhh… you don’t have to beg senpai. i’ll give it to you right now,” his face is still wet with your juices as he speaks and he releases a short moan feeling you around him. “feels so good already—” he says.

pulling himself al the way out just to slam back inside of you, before he slows down so you can feel every inch of him. speeding his pace so his tip can just almost touch a spot that you never had touched before… a spot you didn’t know existed, but knowing that he was close to something and feeling it .. did something to you

“sator—ahh!” your thighs are shaking and you feels big pressure in your insides that make you try to move him off of you. “i feel like ‘m going to…” he’s slamming into you with one hand on your clit as if he knows what you’re going to say.

a squirt of wetness flows as he keeps moving inside of you and you can see that wetness on his lower half but he doesn’t seem to mind it; his face is in pure bliss as he stares back into your eyes. he pushes on your stomach more, more wetness leaking onto your sheets. your eyes are rolled back but he grips your thighs and forces you to sit on top of him.

“can’t-”

“but you will, right… for me, senpai?” and it was something about him calling you senpai again that made you squirt more uncontrollably, splashing more than just a stream. he grabs your ass and grips it hard, pulling you up and down his cock. your insides tightened around him and you unconsciously rolled your hips a few times.

you could feel a wave of everything washing over you, his cock hitting a different part deep inside you, which made your back snap and you wrap your legs around him even more, cumming in his lap with a big moan; a mixture of both cream and squirt soaking his lap.

“i’ll make sure you never forget who made you cum this hard.” he kisses you, grabbing your jaw so that you can open your mouth before he spits in your mouth and you groan, sinking your nails into his back.

you wake up late, almost in the middle of the afternoon, wrapped in your sheets and satoru gone. you aren’t so surprised but you put your robe on and walk down the stairs.

you hear talking or a bit of arguing.

“listen kid, im not leaving my daughters with you. now tell me—” you freeze at the voice of your ex and you see a fuming satoru.

“no you listen—”

holding the robe even more tightly together, you walk towards the two men to make your presence known. “c’mon girls, there’s food on the table.” your daughters race to the kitchen.

“wait babe, i made that for us—” you shoot him a stare and satoru shuts his mouth.

“thanks for dropping them off, have a good day.” you shut the door and sigh. “why didn’t you wake me?”

“i tried but you were so worn out. i guess i overdone it…”

“you guess? i never came in my life and you…” you whispered, feeling dizzy thinking about last night.

“let’s get you something to eat.”

[jelly-o630]

Men would rather punch the ‘lanes merge’ sign in the drive through at chick-fil-a then go to therapy