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thedreadvampy · 2 years

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Losing my shit about this article in which a transphobic Tory was so busy panicking about existing in the vicinity of a Trans that she almost certainly misheard "jeans" as "penis" and decided that not only was this a problem with the other woman, but also that the world must be informed of this pressing danger.

"a trans woman! I had to stand directly behind her....I thought, 'this is going well', I'm handling The Situation fine'..."

translated: I saw a tall woman with broad shoulders. How would I get out of this alive? I thought. she has a PENIS. PENIS PENIS PENIS. through some force of PENIS I mean will I managed to PENIS behave normally towards her. My hands were PENIS PENIS PENIS shaking as I tried to dry them. summoning up all my PENIS courage I said 'dryer's crap innit'. she turned to me and said " yeah I'm just goiPENIS PENIS PENIS"

It's been a week and I'm still shaking. This proves trans women are the problem and I'm not weird. I'm fine. It's fine. If you think about it I'm the hero hePENIS!!!!!

very this

#red said #it's just. I'm obsessed.#everyone on Twitter is saying 'never happened' and i think they're wrong #this absolutely did happen and she's been obsessing over how vindicated it made her feel enough to WRITE AN ARTICLE ABOUT IT #because she MISHEARD SOMEONE IN A CASUAL CONVERSATION #i lay out my reasoning thusly: if you were INVENTING a scary trans woman in bathroom story out of nothing. why would it be this?#why would you go with 'we had a banal conversation until she said a sentence that makes no sense and that no human has ever uttered #but which does coincidentally sounds almost exactly like a mishearing of a very NORMAL thing to say in the circumstances #then she left and nothing else occurred'#if you were going to INVENT a story you would probably make it MAKE SENSE or SOUND THREATENING #i truly believe this is a very authentically told account of what she thinks happened #because who would. by means other than mishearing. think 'I'm going to wipe my hands on my penis' makes any sense at all.#a) 'I'm going to dry my hands on my genitals' says the presumably fully clothed woman #b) who then proceeds to leave without doing anything threatening #c) WHO SAYS PENIS THREATENINGLY? sorry it's writing out 'penis' repeatedly that made this jump out to me but like. who says that?#you might hear someone talk casually about their dick or cock but i stg it's only doctors and TERFs who casually use the word penis much #it's so. clinically descriptive. it's a weird use of language. but it IS. something you could plausibly mishear from 'pants' or 'trousers'

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klanced · 8 days

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“Keith is not a tsundere he just sucks” you know and understand more than a simple mortal mind could ever dream

i feel like a quintessential part of understanding keith's character is realizing that he is generally okay at socializing with people (he just doesn't like dealing with strangers), but there is something very specific about lance that makes keith fumble every single interaction they have

#klance #voltron #idk how to best word this but i think that keith is genetically preordained to fumble every bad bitch he meets tbh #like keith is a hothead but lance is the only person who consistently baits him into making a snarky response and its sooo funny-#-if you interpret it as keith having a crush on lance and him having no idea how to have a normal conversation with his crush #i think this is the funniest way to interpret all of keith's antagonistic barbs towards lance #i firmly believe keith has 0 rizz and negative aura and it is only by the grace of god (lance also being a weirdo and having terrible taste #that keith and lance were ever able to get together. they are freak4freak if you will. keith's rizz would not have worked on anyone else #also keith is excruciatingly aware each time he fumbles lance & he goes to bed every night agonizing over the terrible choices he's made #'WHY DID I SAY THAT WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME' <- one of keith's daily affirmations #otp: we are a good team #ask #anonymous

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ruporas · 1 year

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hello there, angel

[ID: Digital illustration in color of Vash and Wolfwood from Trigun Maximum. Vash is sitting facing the viewer and holds a rose between his clasped together hands, but he’s looking to the left, upwards, at Wolfwood, with an awed expression. Wolfwood hovers over him with wings sprouting from his back. He has a cigarette lit between his lips, his arms and legs are crossed, and he looks back at Vash with a neutral expression. The both of them are covered in a blue shadow, casted by Wolfwood and his hovering form, while warm light hits the back of his wings and over Vash’s legs. Small feathers sits next to Vash. End ID]

#vashwood #vash the stampede #nicholas d wolfwood #trigun #trigun maximum #this is not meant to mean anything btw i just wanted to draw wolfwood as an angle #i love angel and follower depiction but i also think wolfwood is just the most angelic human being ever #he was sent to guide him... he protects him... he Saved him #i mean they both just think of each other as the most good they've seen in the world in a really long time #and in turn makes themselves coil and feel a little more disgusted with themselves. but they're also so Good to each other that they can #start to believe that they can be that good too.#they love each other so much and theyve never loved anyone else like this before so i can just imagine the heights their love can reach #endless pouring of affection in a way they can only keep to their own chest in fear they'd never be able to let go otherwise #that is to say i just feel like they'd worship each other and it's probably excessive but i feel like they both really deserve it #i did not even mean to go on that tangent but back on topic -- i just love angel wolfwood depiction in a way that's Normal......#need more of vash saying cheesy shit like youre my light wolfwood!!!! and wolfwood beating the shit out of him like WHAT ARE YOU SAYING!!!#which is why i have a tablet in the first place. my mission in the world...#ruporas art

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dreamydelite · 3 months

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empty glory

#yugioh #ygo #seto kaiba #art #artists on tumblr #kaibas a v tragic character to me #dude always strives to be the best and only concern himself w the future #he has fought tooth and nail to be a respected duelist and business man yet it seems to me like he doesn't believe he is #yes hes an arrogant prick and extremely set in his ways but thats bc he has to be #nobody has ever supported him or believed in his skills and that kinda sticks w you man!#yes i know mokubas there but that doesnt change the fact he had to take care of him at a young age #its fun to say that he needs to chill out (which he does lol) but i dont think hes ever 'chilled out' a day in his life #bro simply doesnt know how to #and when he comes across people who are everything he wishes he could be and could never attain he just #acts like a total bastard lmao #at the end of the day he has everything he can ever want but never what he needed #also perspectives a bitch why did i do this to myself

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bluespiritshonour · 6 months

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here's 18-19 year old aang sketches. been hearing aang is ugly discourse—no he ain't. he was just 12.

#i really wanted to take part in zukaang bingo but the urge to art struck me a little later #i still might make something else later #enough art for now #i'd try to participate in maiko week but i'm not sure #it's smack in the middle of end semester exams #ink blot #avatar fanart #avatar the last airbender #atla #artists on tumblr #fanart #avatar aang #why did i never use the pencil brush before?!?! i seriously have a personality flaw where i just don't explore stuff.#can you believe i've been using the same fucking brush for lineart ever since i started digital art?#anyways! i don't know how the pencil brush would feel like if i go for colours but this is impeccable.#I have more control over stuff and i love the result #so #i have promised myself i'd be fucking off this hellsite because i have a huge backlog of work that needs to be done #and i'm presently suffering from “can't help but art”. so #yeah. y'all would probably see me around maiko week. byeee!#if i deprive myself of drawing for too long it bursts out of me like this where i do nothing but draw #not healthy at all

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iwasbored777 · 1 year

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The worst thing Miguel and Jessica did to Gwen wasn't even threatening to send her home if she ever visits Miles, it's forcing her to choose their side during the chase scene and make Miles never want to see her again and once the chase scene ended they kicked her out. That's the kind of evil that the Spot was trying so hard to become.

Edit: just in case you forgot - they knew that prison and dead dad were waiting for her when they send her back home

#they're both cool and all but how shitty do you have to be to do this i couldn't believe it when i saw it #it wasn't even bc she was arguing they just didn't want her why didn't they kick anyone else out who helped him #i used to think that they might ever work together sometimes but i don't actually want it #they gaslight her and told her to follow the rules and when she did they kicked her out anyway #that's so bitchy #i just know that if she had anywhere else to go she wouldn't be a part of their cult anyway #and the worst thing is that the fandom blames her for everything #gwen stacy #spider man across the spider verse #i don't want to tag miguel and jess i don't want to start a fight or anything #across the spiderverse #spiderverse

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demadogs · 2 months

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stranger things season one 2016 was so fucking incredible. it exists as an entirely different entity to me than the rest of the show. you literally just had to be there. to this day nothing has ever come close to the amount of universal love for a fictional story that stranger things first received. ive been chasing this high for eight years.

#ik theres a lot of young fans of this show that are teenagers rn and listen #if you were too young to watch this when it first came out I DONT THINK YOU REALIZE HOW HUGE IT WAS AT THE TIME #THE FIRST TEASER FOR SEASON TWO LITERALLY PREMIERED DURING THE SUPERBOWL #THAT ALPHABET WALL DID SOMETHING TO OUR BRAINS AND CHANGED THE WAY WE MAKE AND CONSUME SCIFI FOREVER #i genuinely believe that scene of joyce looking around at all the lights is one of the most iconic scenes in tv history #like i cant even explain it to you we lost our fucking minds over this show it was unlike anything anybody has ever seen #this was such a pivotal memory of my junior and senior year year of high school #everyone was wearing merch my teachers would gush about it in class everyone tuned in to watch the cast on fallon it was EVERYWHERE #and do not even get me started on halloween that year oh my god #it was just so fucking fun i miss it #just rewatched s1 and all i can think about is 17 year old me losing my fucking mind #its such an amazing season #i do understand why some people say they wish it stopped at season one im glad they didnt but i see where theyre coming from #stranger things #byler

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mrdompler · 3 months

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zoey actually DID get run over by that bulldozer but she made a miraculous recovery because charlie prayed every day for her

#smiling friends #charlie dompler #smiling friends zoey #actually. i haven't checked out smiling friends fics yet so stop me if it happened already but that would make an awesome fic i think #the bulldozer accident. charlie is distraught and inconsolable he can't believe this happened why couldn't he do anything why did it have t #happen to her #and it was like after they had an argument or something so he's like extra fucked up about it he's horrified about those being the last #words they ever said to each other #but like you know they get a happy ending i feel like there's probably a few fics like that but she does not come back

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pinacoladamatata · 4 months

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both hands full....

#john hancock #hancock fo4 #fallout 4 #im. making a character sheet for my ss and ofc he's in it #*grabs your face with both my hands*#look i also obv dig the lovable rogue thing he's got going on but we Need to talk about how npcs are afraid of him/#/say he holds a grudge/call you crazy for even thinking about pissing him off #like why? what did he do? aside from hang a man from a balcony. there had to be....more......#i crave more violence #did i ever tall yall about the headcanon i have about his missing toe....#i believe he was like. betrayed and captured by raiders for a minute and they tortured/cut off his toe before he got loose and killed them #and returned to goodneighbor and like. committed atrocities against the judas-esq person that stabbed him in the back #like fed them to supermutants levels of fucked up or something #anyway :)#pina art #i spent like thirty minutes trying to get this sketch to not crap itself when pasted to tumblr #and it still did. fuck me.

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xehanortsreport · 6 months

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the subtle resignation in his expression at even bouncing with the context of his final words kinda destroying me ngl

#the face of a man who is too far gone and knows it #like...hate him all you want but it is genuinely tragic to get to a point where you hate where youve ended up and it's too late to go back #you did it you fucked up you made your bed and now you gotta lie in it #a waste of nearly 100 years of living! you cannot punish this man more than he has punished himself #xehanort lived his life believing he'd get a redo at the very end and when it didn't happen and he died like everyone else he was doomed!#he neglected every friendship he ever had in the hopes he could just remake them once he was god king and start over!#but he couldn't and didn't and by the time he realized it it was far far too late #why did i put all of this in the tags? well. that's our spicy secret.

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worstloki · 2 months

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Fortesa Latifi, We Were Young

#web weaving #kudos to @abby118 for posted the 3rd image up. it was very inspiring(TM) so i stole it #webweaving #i just. idk i just wonder if Loki genuinely felt unloved while being raised #''no matter how much you claimed to love me''#like they made claims. they weren't telling the truth #they didn't love him but they loved thor #why did they love thor so much that there was none to spare for him?#i wonder if he thought like that at any point #if he saw thor's banishment to midgard and considered for even a moment that maybe thor wasn't loves so much either?#that they both pulled the short straw #except loki knows why he knows what he did wrong and that can't be corrected exactly #but he can still taint thor #he can say to thor's face that banishing thor strained odin so much the old man passed away and have it believed #would loki ever believe such a thing if it was said to him?#that his parents cared to that extent?#did they ever #thor's humility arc too... he really had his brother lie to him. and then his brother was gone. no answers about why.#a father who would banish him a mother who wouldn't speak up when he was banished #he wasn't loved as much as he thought. he wasn't as perfect as he thought and that cost him his brother?#it cost him too much to learn an old lesson he should have known #do you think thor resented loki for that too #i think they should have complex emotions @ each other about how they were raised. btw

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unordinary-diary · 1 month

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Blyke and John: the Followup

In my last entry, I pointed out the similarities between chapters 249 and 121, but I had hit the image limit and wasn’t able to embed screenshots. I got around this by linking the chapters, but this is probably my favorite parallel, and to do it justice I think I need to really put them next to each other.

(121) (249)

It’s the same fucking scene but backwards and in a different font.

They’re the SAAAAAAAAAAME!!!!!!!!

This was definitely on purpose. Shit like this ^^ doesn’t happen by accident.

#unordinary #blyke unordinary #john unordinary #you know you’re deep in when you think you’re editing your draft and you’re wondering why the pictures are formatted all weird #Then you scroll down and realize you’re looking at the actual episode #i clicked the wrongfucking tab #T_T #I’m actually insane because when I first realized how similar Blyke and John are I denied it #I was like “nah but they’re nothing alike”#what was I on #girl wtf #AND NOW IVE MADE FIVE WHOLE ENTRIES ABOUT IT #I don’t think i’ve ever made more than one entry about a topic before #The most boldfaced lie i ever did tell myself apparently #Analysis #Blyke and John parallels #i can’t believe i just made an actual tag for that #How many times am I gonna write about this?#this one better be the last #But Really I’ve got no idea what essays my future brain has in store #Speaking of which. Essays is apparently the proper term for what I make #I’ve been calling them “little literary analyses”#which is also true #but I was trying to find a term for fan-nonfiction #nonfiction fanwork #like this #meta #and my brother was like: “you mean an essay?”#Yeah i guess that is what I mean #I like fan-nonfiction better though

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danandfuckingjonlmao · 24 days

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dan and phil are like jesus in that they’re dramatic ass fruity men in their 30s always going like “i am making this SACRIFICE for THE PEOPLE” and everyone is like “no one asked you to do this in fact we’d all rather you just did not do this” and they’re like “IT IS TOO LATE NOW YOU HAVE TO LIVE WITH THE CONSEQUENCES THIS IS WHAT YOU WANTED” and we’re like “no no we didn’t want this actually and you made this decision with your whole ass adult brain you truly could have just not done this and we’d all be better off for it but now we all have to suffer because YOU refuse to say no to shit” and i think that’s ridiculous stupid annoying awful beautiful

#/j #dnp #jesus did NOT have to die on the cross like pilate gave him so many outs and he was like ‘noooo i have to be a martyr’ and that’s #why pilate washed is hands of him #he’s like ‘this bitch is too messy i don’t wanna be involved’#good for him #dan and phil #‘oh we HAVE to do this thing for this sponsor oh we HAVE to do this really gay embarrassing coupley thing on the gaming channel’#i swear someday they’ll be like ‘this video is sponsored by dragon city so we’re gonna be doing the chapstick challenge!!’#‘can’t believe you guys and dragon city and the whole world literally begged and forced us to make out for a video but here we go 🙄🤣’#if i ever saw that shit in a video i would immediately click off unsubscribe block them report them delete my youtube account #move change my name get a fake id go off the grid and try to start over somewhere else #i know there are some of you freaks who actually wanna see them kiss but seeing that is genuinely my biggest fear lmao #like gross rosa those are our dads #actually dan feels like my cousin and phil feels like my cousin’s husband if that makes sense #i was 16 when i started watching so they didn’t really raise me maybe that’s why #dan howell #daniel howell #phan #amazingphil #phil lester #danisnotonfire #yeet my deenp #yeet my deet #danandphilgames #d&p #dip and pip #hbdnell

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rabbits-of-negative-euphoria · 9 months

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you are pitting Jesus and Santa Claus against each other. I am acknowledging Santa as both a mythic symbol of Christ and a cultural legend based upon a real man whose faithfulness to Christ was used by God to grant common grace not just to the people of Myra but throughout the entire world. we are not the same.